#wc next gen

[fishbaitslime]

FireRaven hypokits?

i havent rlly thot abt fire/raven much but this DEFOOO made me realize that this ship is very cute lol

in my heart raven and fire had crushes on each other as apprentices and so when ravenpaw ran away from thunderclan, firepaw struggled a lot with staying with thunderclan and he kinda fell into more of a background character while sandstorm filled in his role of savior of the clans, becoming leader and killing tigerstar. once all that happened i think raven n fire reconnected and ravenpaw came back to live within the clan, eventually becoming ravensong :0)

ROBINPOOL is our Leafpool stand-in for this au, and their personalities are fairly similar. The only difference I'd say is she's a lot less outspoken, takes after Ravensong almost entirely and is just very awkward and nervous. She is also named after Ravensong's mother, Robinwing!

FINCHKIT is from the pairs second litter and was raised when Fireheart and Ravensong were both well into senior warrior-hood, now both very confident and experienced parents. He is very chipper and loud, always speaking his mind and doing frankly whatever he wants. He's a bit of a terror lol

SCORCHSTORM is essentially just squirrelflight lol. Her name change because Sandstorm named her "squirrel-" in my heart, and her prefix is taken from Sandstorm! :0) Sandstorm, Fireheart, and Ravensong are all very close friends + helped raise each others kits so I think they recognize she takes after Sandstorm a lot and wanted 2 honor that

requests for warrior hypokits are open! :D

[echoes-in-echoclan]

Oh my gosh y'all... I hate to leave you on a cliffhanger for so long.. I'm so sorry...

Moon 0 

Moon 41.6 - Moon 42.2

[sapling-clangen]

Moon 44

Oh.. That's not good...

Moon 0

Moon 43 - Moon 45

[soupclan]

yay moon 10 yippee. things become more complex 11 onwards ouh. next update? Who Knows !

moon 8- v

moon 9- v

moon 10- v

ok so i think from now on the boring bg colour will at least be coloured according to the season. not including this post oops (moon 8 is leaf-fall, 9-10 is leaf-bare)

and look it's scorchspots finally showing up!!! dogbelly but with short fur . and only miserable encounters apparently ripp

previous - start - next

[rizz-penguin]

Two star trek tng warrior cats :) gonna do lore + dr soong next so i don't forget later

[mossclan-moons]

To celebrate the whole wave of followers I've gained in the past 24hrs... How about I drop the next page a little early? 👀

[newt-clan]

This week is gonna be a rough one guys, yall aint ready😴

[beyuwol]

yuwol decides to try out for next gen.

a part of yuwol doesn't know if he's doing the right thing. he basically signed up for the show in the spur of a moment, not thinking all too rationally. nothing good will come out of this, if his parents found out—when they find out—it won't just be a lecturing phone call. he'd be tainting their name, he'd become an embarrassment to the family; he'd probably become the black sheep. but maybe he's tired of putting up the same tight smile, letting out the same polite laugh, and living day-to-day on mindless routine of lessons and recitals.

maybe he wants to feel something. another reason to live—a chance to fight, to survive. yuwol doesn't think he'd be able to win anything, but this might be his best chance to discover new things about himself, to learn there's something else outside of violin and classical music. there's life outside his monotonous days, yuwol is sure of it now. he could find it in next gen.

and if not, at least he could say he tried.

it's already surprising that he made it past the first round of auditions. he doesn't remember what he filled up at this point, other than submitting a picture of himself. it wasn't very flattering, admittedly. the truth is that if it weren't for the encouragement he received from a certain someone, he wouldn't have gotten to this stage. perhaps yuwol really had been blessed with a lucky charm of sort these days. now that he made it though, it'll be bad if he wastes all this by putting in no effort.

so he does. for once, he doesn't reach out for his violin ( but he does pack it into his bag out of habit, he can't really go anywhere without it—like it's a part of him ). he shuffles through his brain for songs he can perform, without the aid of the violin. he wants to try this stage out with his voice alone, if that's even possible. he doesn't know a lot of songs outside of what his parents shoved down his throat, but ever since his trip to japan his mental playlist has been growing. not significantly, but enough that he finds something to cover out of the confines of his parents' influence.

all he has to do now is... go for it, right?

—

performing is nothing new. he's used to performing even, forced onto stages before he could properly learn how to talk, an instrument shoved into his hands. it was fun at first, until he feels his own soul slowly melting away. and then, he started playing to fill in the void that resides within him, or maybe to chase the feeling of dying. he's trying something different this time; his attempt to live.

the cameras don't shock him, they're there and they're dramatic. yuwol takes a glance at them as he takes the center of the stage, wholly ready for his turn. he can't exactly dance, his only talent lie outside what's needed for an idol. he can sing though, he can lose himself to music, he can collapse into the lyrics that stumble out of his own lips. maybe that's enough.

he leaves his violin case to the side. he can hear his dad scolding him in the background, telling him that he's wasting his time, that he's doing nothing but humiliating the han family. he shuts all that away and focuses on the judges before him. their gazes are sharp, they're probably scrutinizing him in their heads, but they can never scar him as much as his parents has. he introduces himself, and he's already scorching. his parents may be watching.

yuwol taps into that strange burn, the complicated welling inside him—and he sings.

his voice comes out a little raspy, only aiding to the vibes of the song, a certain kind of longing attached to the words forming on his mouth.

don't let me go back to darkness of blue as long as i'm with you

it's a desperate attempt, really. to keep himself afloat, to keep himself breathing, to keep himself above the surface of the water. even singing like this is an attempt to remind himself he's alive, the way his throat is closing in on him and that his vocal chords are working become proof that he does exist. the 60-seconds come to an end very quickly, and they move onto the next segment.

it starts off in a rather comedic manner: “what is the most interesting place that you have been to wearing the shoes that you’re wearing now?”

yuwol blinks, a little taken aback. but he does answer with honesty. he makes sure to keep his ususal smile on his face, the same one he'd use to impress his parents' friends during events. "it's probably... a forest somewhere. i was trying to get myself lost." it's a cryptic response, but maybe that will give him more... personality? he's not sure at this point.

“what was your favorite thing about the last season of next gen?” yuwol presses his lips together. "my friends were a part of it... i was rooting for them. they're my favorite part of last season, but i was also inspired by how they discovered new things about themselves. and how they were resilient in their pursuit of their goals."

the question afterward is to be expected. “what can you bring to the table that we won’t see in any other contestant?” yuwol takes in a deep breath, preparing his answer in this short moment. "i.. live through music." it's an admittance; a confession. "i can play a few stringed instruments, as well as a bit of the piano. i study music composition, i can use my experience in my career as an idol." it's like he's doing a job interview, which isn't too far off the mark.

“what was the first thing you thought about when you woke up this morning?” a random question. yuwol tries his best to recall the morning, which he thankfully still remembers even among the nerves today brought. "the sun is shining brightly today. it feels like my lucky charm isn't too far away. maybe i can get through today after all." once again, his reply makes no sense to anyone but his own self.

“what’s your favorite useless fact?” yuwol can't help himself—a small chuckle escapes him, his faux smile breaks away into a real one; genuine and more vibrant than the last. "someone once told me that when two people laugh together, their hearts are in sync." he laughs a little, small sparks in his eyes. "i don't exactly know if that fact is... well, fact... but a STEM major told me that. they should know more about biology than me."

that's the end of the unexpected round of questions. here is where yuwol has to display a unique skill. his first instinct is to grab the violin from his bag. he debates in his head for a while, and he eventually decides why not? he thinks it'd be ironic, bringing his violin—the only thing his parents loved about him—into an idol survival show—something his parents vehemently hated and found useless. he's supposed to show off whatever he can do.

"not sure if this counts as... unique, but this is what i do to make it through my daily life. i play my violin." he tucks the instrument under his chin, holding onto his bow like he's clinging to his own life—and he plays. he only takes a minute, closing his eyes and letting his fingers do all the talking. in a way, he's singing too—this time, with his violin. a melody flows from his hands, calm and soothing. this is soothing his own nervousness as well.

afterwards, he bows, and returns his violin back into his bag. until he realizes he should probably do something... funnier. something more entertaining? something less boring. "oh, another thing." he grabs a rubber band from his bag too, placing it between his fingers, stretching the object. he aims at a random empty water bottle by the stage, and shoots his shot, knocking the bottle over instantly.

he probably shocked the judges for doing that out of nowhere after a rather peaceful and harmonious violin performance. "that's... another unique skill. i used to do play with my toy violin strings like that when they've snapped." yuwol blinks once more, certain he might've made a weird impression on the judges.

"sorry about that... thank you for your time." he exits feeling a little strange.

but it's not a bad feeling.

[bejaeyoung]

jay auditions for next gen.

there's a lot more that he can do in this life, and jay is aware of that. so he tries to dabble in everything, whether wreckless or not, as long as he gets something new out of it. it's thrilling, in a way, jumping head first into things. as long as it had to do with music though, jay wants in—jay's ready.

honestly, he didn't properly tune in to next gen when it happened. he watched a few episodes, but never went through the whole thing. and yet here he is, having signed up and expecting a call back. it's one way to get his music out there, to gain an even bigger following for people to listen to him. and even if he doesn't make it to the end that doesn't mean he would have achieved nothing by going.

but jay wants to reach the end—he wants to win; his delusional brain is getting in the way of him thinking rationally. go big or go home. that is what's repeated in his head as he prepares for his 60-second audition. that's simple, jay can do what he's been doing all along: performing.

he should probably go all out, then.

—

so here comes audition day, and jay already decided what he wanted to do. it'll probably do good to do a cover of something unusual, so he decided to go with a a song in another language. that can show them he's... adaptable? the truth is he's just doing whatever he wants though. something with a fast beat, and he has a song in mind already. quick pace, but with enough vocal spaces where he can show off his voice to.

he practiced over and over again. day in and day out, even if he's doing something else he's thinking about how his performance will go. now he's here, ready to give the judges and the audience(?) a glimpse of his abilities. he doesn't forget to introduce himself, but it's not his name that matters—it's what he can do.

he sings and he raps, 60-seconds isn't enough but he did the best he can. 60-seconds pass by and his throat is a little tight, but he made it. his body doesn't remain stiff, he grooves to the music, sways and enjoys his time on stage. it's always here that he feels alive—that he can connect with something bigger than him, that he truly feels seen.

it ends pretty fast, and it's time for the rapid-fire questions. he barely thinks about his answers really, always one to run his mouth and keep talking. he's usually the one asking the weird questions, so it's funny being on the opposite end of that now.

here comes his first question: “what was the first thing you thought about when you woke up this morning?”

jay hums, as if he's thinking. he's not. "imagined the audience today are all eggplants so i don't get nervous later." it kind of worked, most of his nervousness are gone now. "i totally didn't do that by the way. i imagined a variety of fruits, not just eggplants." that doesn't make it any more respectable.

next question, he finds a little distasteful. “what would you do if you won ₩1,000,000,000 (~$750,000) in the lotto?” they ask, which causes jay to shrug.

"i don't know, that's a lot of money. i'd probably donate half of it. and the rest can go to my music funds." the answer comes out of him easily. "there's an orphanage i want to help flourish. that's pretty much it though." he thinks of the people back there—the friends he made whenever he was dropped off by his rich parents because they didn't want to parent a troublesome kid. he wonders whether his friends back then are watching him now.

“what two things do you consider yourself to be very bad at?” that's a funny question. jay should probably return it with an equally hilarious answer. "i want to say nothing, but people say i'm horrible at shutting up. but they should see me now, i'm barely going on tangents right now. oh, i guess i'm terrible at math too. why do i have to find the square root of x? that's an alphabet. not a math."

“why do you want to become a kpop idol?” that question makes sense. par for the course in fact. "because i think i can make songs that can capture everyone's hearts. and i want to be able to perform them too. being on stage is fun and thrilling, so i wanna keep doing that until i can't anymore." yup, that's the best way to put it. no filter.

“would you rather go to a tropical island or to the north pole?” back to the comedic questions? jay doesn't mind. "i wanna go the north pole, obviously. i wanna go see my man santa claus. then be one of his elf boys. i wanna bribe my way into the nice list this year." so unserious.

that marks the end of the random questions. it's kind of saddening, jay was having fun answering all those questions. it didn't even matter that there were cameras up in his personal space or that he feels like he's being stared down.

"okay, great. can i borrow your stool?" jay asks as politely as he can. it's not a big chair, just a stool that can be folded. it's light too, which is perfect for the job. the staff nods and he picks up the stool with a hand. yeah, this will do.

what was that avengers line again? right. he takes the stool and balances it with his fingers on just one of its legs. "perfectly balanced, as all things should be," jay speaks, delivery on point, dramatic and showboating. "anyone got anything else they wanna offer me?"

another staff member steps forward, this time with something related to the camera—was it their mini tripod? guess that works. this one is heavier than the last, but jay manages to do it anyway, keeping the item in place and only moving a bit to keep the center of gravity in check. he keeps at it for a good few seconds. "i'm really good at balancing things. that helps me dance." throwing that in there just for fun.

looks like he ran out of time. jay bows and thanks everyone for their time, hoping that would be enough entertainment for the judges and everyone at home who may be watching.

[street-smarts00]

Weirdest Place

Spencer Reid x gen neutral!reader

Summary: The team finds out you and Spencer have been dating during a night out.

WC: 1.1k

A/N: this is yet another fic based on an episode of friends, specifically a scene from the blackout episode but i added a fun twist lol

Tags: conversations about sex but not smut, established relationship between r & reid, consumption of alcohol

After the team was finished at the BAU they all went out to a local bar for drinks. As the night went on JJ and Hotch left to be at home with their kids. With their boss gone and the tipsiness from their drinks, the topic of conversation got more and more inappropriate.

“A boat?” Rossi asked

“Yes,” Derek confirmed

“A boat?” Emily spoke this time.

“Why don’t you believe me?” Derek asked, slightly offended.

Emily raised her hands in defense, “It’s not that we don’t believe you.”

“It just seemed like your weirdest place would be a bit more adventurous based on how you brought it up,” Rossi voiced.

Derek furrowed his eyebrows, “and a boat isn’t adventurous?”

“No it is,” Penelope chuckled before reaching for her drink. Of course, she’d already heard about Derek’s nautical escapades.

Derek directed his attention back to Emily, “And what about you? What’s your weirdest place?”

She leaned back in her seat with a tinge of embarrassment she tried to hide with smugness. “That’s classified,”

Rossi and Derek cringed at Emily’s diversion.

“Oh god,” Rossi chuckled before taking a sip of his drink.

“Do I even wanna know?” Derek asked half joking.

Emily shrugged instead of answering. Derek decided he was better off not pushing Emily to share her story. He then brought his attention to the man across from him.

“What about you, pretty boy?”

Spencer’s head darted to him with raised eyebrows. “Me?”

“You got a weirdest place?”

“I- um.”

His ears started to turn a shade of crimson and he stuttered on his words, or lack thereof since he was caught off guard.

“It’s probably like a library or something,” Rossi jokes, earning a bright laugh from Derek.

Penelope set her drink down, “don’t make him say it if he doesn’t- “

“Actually it was.”

Everyone froze and turned to Spencer.

Emily was the first to speak, “What?”

Spencer shifted in his seat while the courage he had before started to dwindle. His face was now officially turning red.

“Me and um- someone were at the library because I was showing her it’s Edgar Allen Poe collection. Then at some point we ended up in … um the second floor bathroom.”

“Oh my god,” Penelope giggled before placing her hand on her mouth in shock.

“I can’t believe I was right,” Rossi commented.

“I can’t believe Spencer Reid was getting freaky in a library,” Derek said with a humorous grin.

“Shut up,” Spencer squeaked in a high pitched voice.

He hoped the topic of conversation would quickly be dropped so he didn’t have to reveal too much about his love life. But he suspected that wouldn’t happen once you came back to the table.

You and Spencer had started dating a few months prior and wanted to keep things to yourselves. You both intended to figure out the beginning of your relationship without the eyes of your friends.

“The line for the bathroom was so long,” you complained as you approached the table and sat down next to Spencer. “What did I miss?”

“Oh we never heard Y/N’s place,” Penelope excitedly pointed out.

You looked at her confused, “What place?”

“I have no clue how we got here but they all started talking about the weirdest places they’ve had sex,” Emily explained.

“Wow. Well, when I’m done I need to hear all of yours,” you pointed your glass in a motion towards all of them before drinking the last sip.

“I usually don’t venture outside the bedroom but out of the few times I have I think there’s two tied for first place.”

“What’s one of them?”

“Library.”

Silence fell over the group. Spencer’s stomach dropped to the floor at your answer. His face turned cherry red and his eyes remained frozen on the table in front of him.

You on the other hand were baffled at the reaction from your friends.

“What?”

While your eyes scanned the group you were met with relatively neutral expressions that didn’t match the growing tension in the air. All of them looked as if they wanted to say something, but not one of them was ready to speak.

Embarrassment and regret were creeping their way towards you in silence. Your body tensed up and you folded your arms in front of you.

“Come on guys, it's not that weird. It’s not like we were in an aisle, we were in the bathroom,” you tried to defend yourself.

That sentence seemed to spark something in the group. Their body language started to relax but still had a bit of hesitation. They all knew at this point, but they wanted you to confirm it.

“What floor?”

You followed the voice to Emily “Excuse me?”

“What floor was the bathroom on?”

You couldn’t wrap your head around her question.

“Why does that matter?”

“It does, which floor?” Penelope questioned this time.

“Second I think,” you hesitated, still confused.

“Oh my god!” Penelope squealed. “You guys are sleeping together?”

With your eyes wide, face hot, and heart pounding, you stared at her. Trying to figure out how a story like this was one they already heard. You forgot until now that they were already playing this game before you got back.

Turning to the side you playfully smacked Spencer’s arm. “You told them that?”

He gaped at you and grabbed his arm. Face still red of course now accompanied with a crack in his voice. “I didn’t think you were gonna tell them. I thought you would have talked about the other time.”

“Why would I tell them that?” You said in a quieter tone.

“What other time?” Derek interrupted, filled with curiosity.

Rossi pipped in next, “you said two places were tied for weirdest, what’s the other place?”

You and Spencer went quiet. You looked at each other before returning your gaze to the group.

“I think this is a great time to get a refill,” you grabbed your glass and stood up. “Spencer, coming with?”

He quickly scrambled to stand up, “Absolutely.”

The two of you made your way to the bar as your friends all started murmuring.

“So, you didn’t want to tell them you had sex on a plane?” He asked with a slight smirk.

“No, of course not!” You squealed which earned a laugh from him.

“Eventually they would’ve found out we’re dating and I didn’t want them to figure out it was on the jet,” you explained.

“It’s not like any of them were there,” he said before leaning down to kiss your forehead.

“I still don’t wanna get fired.”

[returnofeternity]

synopsis. taking care of natalie after she kills ben.

pairing: natalie scatorccio x gn!reader

genre: angst, comfort, fluff

warnings. mentions of death and blood

wc: 951

· · 𖦹 · ·

you could only hold off misty for so long.

natalie was in there for hours staring at what she had done. ben's sickly face finally looks at peace though, and it eases her anguished heart just slightly.

you could hear her quiet, wheezed sobs for hours, and you weren't ready to see her come out of his shelter, barely able to keep herself upright as she stumbled past the gate. your heart sinks when she rubs his blood on her cheek. all you wanna do is pull her into a hug but misty's sudden yell makes fear coarse through your entire body.

this isn't gonna end well. it was never gonna end well for natalie, but now there's gonna be a huge scene.

"what did you do?!" misty screams at nat, looking at her with the utmost disdain. she pushes your hand away roughly when you try to calm her down.

"misty," you call out her name, trying to get her attention away from nat. it doesn't work. not even when you grab her shoulders to try and turn her to face you. the word "murderer" flies from her mouth and you look toward nat, her face covered in snot and ben's blood.

no, she was doing the right thing.

"it was the right thing to do." nat says shakily, swallowing down her snot. "i'm sorry, but it's true. he was suffering."

you walk up to the group and stand protectively next to nat, glaring at shauna who looks at her with malice. she's acting like she wasn't the first to suggest killing him in the first place. it makes you angry. what makes you even angrier is her barking chihuahua behind her who shouts at nat.

"shut the fuck up." melissa utters.

your arm gets brushed by nat's as gen pushes her from behind, muttering the same words as melissa. as you watch nat fall to her hands and knees, your fight-or-flight response kicks in, and it's fight that wins when it seems like everyone is ganging up on her, starting with van who chastises her. you shout and shove gen back, telling her that if she ever lays a hand on your girlfriend again, she won't have any hands soon.

the chatter in the background as shauna rants to the girls means nothing to you as you kneel next to nat and grab her, helping her sit up on her knees as you brush her hair back.

"are you okay?" you whisper, wiping snot off her lips and attempting to wipe the smudges of blood on her cheek.

she gives you a half-nod, realizing that actually, no, she's not okay.

you tune back into the conversation at the worst time.

"natalie will prepare the feast." shauna says smugly.

· · 𖦹 · ·

nat's not even gripping onto your hand as you lead her back to her hut. she's looking past you when you turn back to glance at her, needing to make sure she's even there in the first place because it sure doesn't feel like it.

you set her down gently on the seat, looking into her eyes and trying to get her to look at you. it only works when you grip her chin, mumbling her name softly as you make her look up.

"nat? natalie?" you mumble, your thumb rubbing gentle circles on her chin. you give her a sad smile when she finally looks at you, hand leaving her chin to rest on her knee, squeezing comfortingly. "i'm gonna clean you up, okay?"

she nods stiffly and wipes at her bloody cheek, lips opening in a heavy sigh. you scratch the side of her head and get up, telling her you'll be back in a minute. your stomach twists when you bump into gen on the way out, glaring harshly at her before you walk to the spot where the water buckets are. you collect one and bring it back to the hut, setting it down next to nat and searching for a rag.

"do you want me to help you?" you dip the rag in the bucket, squeezing some of the water out before dragging it along her cheek. "with...ben."

you're not sure you could do it if you wanted to, even for nat. saying it is one thing, but actually cutting him up? you used to help shauna with some of the animals back at the cabin during the first spring, but that was just cutting up the meat, not actually bleeding them out.

nat's eyes flutter shut as you clean up her cheek, pressing it lightly against your hand as she shakes her head. "no, i can do it. not like shauna'll let you help anyway. it's a punishment."

you hum sadly and twist the blood out of the rag over the bucket before dipping it in again. you wash over her cheek once again before moving to her nose and lips, making sure all the snot and dirt get scrubbed off it.

"thank you." she speaks up. "for looking out all night. misty would've caught me and killed me herself if you weren't out there." both of you laugh lightly, and she grabs your hand with the rag in it and takes it from you to set it to the side. "i love you."

nat looks down as she plays with your fingers mindlessly, her body still trembling from a few hours ago. you bring your hand back to caress her cheek, nat fully melting into it now as she kisses your thumb.

"i love you too." you reply, cupping her other cheek and kissing her. "should probably start getting ready for the feast. let me help you get ready..."

[behaneul]

DISAPPOINTMENT in which haneul gets a call from his mother post-next gen finale

cw: haneul being absolutely torn apart by a single phone call aka parental disappointment used as a weapon

tw: suicidal thoughts/idealization

     “did you really think you had a chance?”

     it’s definitely his fault for becoming careless. he had been so used to all of his phone calls recently being from seojun or other friends, or work, that he had forgotten that he had never gotten around to blocking his mom’s phone number. she hadn’t contacted him at all, aside from once after the first episode of next gen (which he had ignored) and he really should’ve known better than to think that she wouldn’t have watched the finale. 

     she probably had been hoping for him to fail too, if he knew her at all. he knew she tried to live vicariously through him and since she wasn’t a dancer, she was probably upset that he had done so well while claiming he was a dancer instead of using his vocals.

     either way, he had absentmindedly picked up the phone in the middle of prepping to cook dinner, assuming seojun was calling him to let him know if he could come drop over some of the boxes, considering they were mid-moving. or someone else. not her. 

     he almost drops his phone when he hears her voice.

     “mom,” he greets, trying to pretend he hadn’t heard the way she hadn’t even bothered to greet him before going straight for the jugular. he puts down the knife so he wouldn’t be tempted to miss the tomato he was cutting and hit his own arm instead or something. he momentarily entertains the idea, shaking his head as he goes to wash his hands. “how nice of you to call.”

     “what did you think was going to happen on that show? did you think you would woo the judges with your silly little dance and get signed for it? don’t make me laugh.”

     he closes his eyes, breathing in slowly through his nose as he grips the counter, his grip so tight that his knuckles have paled. he’s not sure why she’s so good at saying the exact words that will dig right into his heart and twist and he’s always so helpless to stop them from taking root in his brain for him to overthink for the rest of his life. 

     “not even a hi?” haneul responds through gritted teeth, trying to sound civil. he knows from experience that he can’t talk back or she cracks down harder, and he suddenly wishes that he had moved into seojun’s place earlier, instead of waiting for next gen to end. he doesn’t know if he’ll be okay to be alone after this without wanting to off himself immediately. he’s not sure when his relationship with his mother had gotten so toxic since she had originally been his number one fan, but he knows they’ll never get back to those days.

     “you’re absolutely worthless as an idol. can’t dance, can barely sing after all the money i invested in singing lessons but you spent all your time doing that worthless dancing. what a waste of resources and time. you should give up and come home, maybe we can get you a job at a bar or something and you can sing there at least.”

     her voice is just a buzz in his ear at this point, his heartbeat thudding so loudly in his head that that’s all he can hear. 

     thud.

     thud.

     thud.

     “you can’t even sing right. why did you even try to rap? you can’t do anything right, can you? can’t even pick the right major in school, either. anything for your little dancing right? where did that get you? at the bottom, right? what an absolute joke.”

     “stop.”

     “what?”

     he can feel his heart thudding harder in his chest, tears pricking at the corners of his eyes. his palms are sweaty and he wipes his free hand on his sweats. he’s never talked back to her before, and he never thought that the day would come when he would.

     he’s actually not sure if he can say anything else.

     “stop talking,” is all haneul manages to say next, his voice shaking and he hates it. he hates how she can make him feel so small without even being anywhere near him. she doesn’t even have his address and he wonders if it’s time for him to change his phone number finally. 

     “what did you just say? cho haneul, how dare you speak to me this way?”

     “please,” he whispers, unable to move from the position he’s in, gripping the phone with both hands. 

     “please stop.”

     “you—”

     he hangs up and puts his phone down, staring at his home screen’s wallpaper for a long moment before locking it. it starts buzzing immediately with his mom’s contact showing up and he ends up throwing his phone across the room onto his bed, watching as it rolls and hits the wall. it continues to buzz as he stares at it, waiting for it to stop. it stops after a while, before it starts again. it stops after a while, before it starts again.

     and again.

     and again.

     and again.

     “stop,” he whispers, having ended up on the floor of his studio at some point, the buzzing not fading into the back of his mind like he had hoped but instead feeling like an alarm screeching in his brain.

     “please stop.”

     he’s not sure how long he sits there, arms wrapped around his knees as he listens to his phone vibrate on his bed. it feels like forever. the buzzes go on and on and on in the silence of his apartment. 

     eventually it stops. whether it’s because she’s given up or his phone’s died, he’s not sure. he’s also not sure about whether he feels relief or dread at the sudden silence after the incessant buzzing.

     he’s not really sure how to come back from this either. because, as much as he hates what she had said, he won’t deny that that’s what he was thinking too. when he had dropped from first rank to almost last. from being the team that had been ‘almost good enough to debut tomorrow’ to not being wanted enough by any company to even get a contract.

     no one wanted someone else’s sloppy leftovers, right? he had done well on the show but not well enough. 

     maybe his chance had passed.

     maybe he should give up while he’s ahead and accept that he’s just not meant to be on stage, as much as he wished he could be.

     maybe he should give up while he’s ahead.

     he just doesn’t know how to pick himself up from here.

[echoes-in-echoclan]

New page! Ft. my dog, Lola!

ALSO I forgot to say it but Auburnpaw's bee sting is better!

Moon 0 

Moon 35.2 - Moon 27.1

[sapling-clangen]

Doodle page! I’ve been hit by the post Art Fight art motivation and can’t stop drawing lol

[soupclan]

two more!!! and a blog specifically for this bc. idk, if people r following for kitty content, then this is where it shall be exclusively kitty content!

moon 6- v

moon 7- v

i can't promise i'll be quick with updates, but i will try :]

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[phannetasm]

The rarest of flowers// Alucard x fem!reader

𓆩𓁺𓆪𝒄𝒘: vampire stuff (biting, blood drinking), soft, protective Alucard, minimal religious symbolism, a bit suggestive towards the end. i had such a nice time writing this for Alucard oh my shayla. wc: 2.2k // read part 1

Weeks passed since the fight against Erzsebet ended and peace was restored in Paris. With danger out of the way, Annette and Richter gone and Maria finally settled down at her own place, it was safe for Alucard to return by your side.

He hoped the letter he sent a few days prior reached you– hoped you were waiting for him by the gates of the abbey, ready to depart as he instructed but much to his surprise, when he finally climbed the pathway up the last hill before the monastery and the entrance came into view you weren't there. Alucard's steps quickened instinctively, his fangs baring almost imperceptibly as he inhaled through his mouth, bracing himself for the metallic taste and smell of blood but the air was fresh, clean, bathed in moonlight. So you weren't hurt. No ill fortune had befallen the abbey while he wasn't there to protect you.

The dhampir only picked up a trace of your smell when he was well past the gates of your sanctuary – that faint, now slightly different scent that was still undoubtedly yours. After breathing it from your skin those fleeting nights he could recognize it anywhere. Following your scent, Alucard stepped around the rudimentary graves marked with wooden crosses in the yard, careful as if not to awaken the dead, and made his way behind the church. When his eyes landed on your figure, kneeled under a blooming apple tree his breath hitched, his muscles tensing. He didn't even bother to keep silent as he ran towards you, his boots crunching against the dirt. By the time you noticed him and got up to your feet he was by your side, pulling you in a gentle embrace.

"My sweet, how I have missed you." he whispered against your neck, a content sigh escaping his lips when you returned the embrace. You were real, warm against his cold touch and the frankincense in your hair made him shudder; you smelled so holy, so sacred. He only released you when you called out his name, tilting his head down to meet your gaze and oh you looked at him so beautifully, as if stars had fallen from the sky into your eyes. "It has been so long. I feared you would not make it here." you said softly, threading your fingers through his hair.

"I swore I would come for you and I did. I sincerely apologize it took so long, but there were some things I still needed to set in order." he explained, taking your hand from his hair to press a kiss to your knuckles. "I am pleased to find you well."

Your gaze softened at his gesture, fingers slipping between his pale ones to hold his hand. "Yes, one could say I am well."

"I hope the nuns did not cause you any trouble." he jested, attempting to lighten the mood and you cracked a small smile. Hoisting up your white dress, you took a seat on the ground, patting the spot next to you. "They have been quite gentle, though judging by how eager they were to help me pack for the trip they must be delighted to see me gone."

Alucard sat beside you, brushing the white petals that had fallen onto your hair. The silence of the night was only disrupted by the soft rustle of your dress when you moved to lay your head on his lap. With his back propped against the tree trunk, the dhampir extended one leg out long so your could find a more comfortable position, toying with the strands sprawled across his lap. You could feel his gaze on the back of your head, urging you to turn face him but you kept your back to him, looking towards the church– it's walls almost silver in the moonlight. The cross atop the steeple has long lost its shine, now only casting a long shadow across the grass in the yard. Sighing softly, you folded an arm under your head, burying your face in the crook of your elbow.

The dhampir's hand moved to your scalp, gently caressing the side of your head. He could tell by how tense you were that something was weighing on your mind. Was it his return? Or perhaps you were displeased he had let you wait so long before he came back? His nose scrunched at the thought and he shook his head as if to dismiss his worries. "You seem nostalgic. Is something bothering you, my sweet?"

You shrugged absentmindedly and Alucard couldn't help but huff lightly. You could be so stubborn sometimes...

"If there is nothing upsetting you, dear lady, you'd do well to face me. Two months apart and you greet me with a cold shoulder... It is quite cruel." he chided and you finally complied, turning on your back and gazing up at him. Alucard didn't miss the shadow clouding your eyes, his thumb tracing the shape of your brow, moving down to your cheek. "What is it?"

Toying with the wet blades of grass at his feet, you looked up to meet his gaze again. "What will you do when I grow old?" Alucard's lips parted but before he could answer you continued. "Or if some misfortune befalls me? I am but a mortal, I am bound to perish eventually–"

"Sweet thing, you must not concern yourself with such grim thoughts" he began but you quickly cut him off again, lifting your head off his thigh. "How could I not think about it when in a few decades I will wither and you will be alone again? You cannot imagine how much this thought pains me–"

"The grief will be mine to deal with." he said sharply, obviously distraught by your words. Lifting yourself to your knees, you shimmied closer to him, hands gently tugging at the material of his coat, drawing him closer. "But it does not have to be like this. You could turn me."

The words knocked the breath out of him, brows shooting up in surprise; but only a split second later a dark shadow was cast over his face. How could he even suggest that he would take away your essence, your light and condemn you to a life in the shadows? "Absolutely not." he said stiffly, his composure wavering.

"Listen to me" you argued "We could be together forever, we could travel the world without worrying about me dying or anything else. Do you not want that?"

The dhampir shook his head, his eyes squeezing shut. He needed a moment to recollect himself; your sudden request rendered him speechless. The mere thought of turning you into one of his kind, to drain the life from you– that life that made you so radiant, so beautiful and so you seemed sacrilegious. Nevetheless he could find reason in your logic and perhaps a shred hope too. He had loved and lost so many over centuries, not even once offering to turn any of his lovers. He has been selfless, reminding himself that those people he so treasured deserved to rest in peace, to know the eternal sleep and the Garden of Eden, not roam the earth as devils. Yet, your pleas were weakening his resolve. A more selfish and indulgent part of him reasoned it wouldn't be that terrible if he made you a vampire– his bride in life and death until the end of time.

"You would be hunted down by humans, cursed wherever you go. You will never have a home nor will you feel the warmth of the sun upon your skin again. You will live in the shadows and feed on the blood of innocents. Is that the fate you wish to damn yourself to?" he spoke with feigned composure, cradling your face in his hands. His palms felt cold against your cheeks, your eyes glistening as you nodded your head. "I do not care for other humans, nor for the sun. I only wish to be by your side."

Your selflessness, willingness to give up on life to join him in death was disarming. It warmed his heart in a revolting way, but despite his hesitation, he was but a creature of impulse; turning humans was his legacy, a craving running deep in his blood. With steady hands he pulled you up in his lap, your legs resting on each side of his hips, his hair draping over your frame when he leaned over you. "Do you fully understand what you wish for? What you would give up on?"

The dhampir noticed the shadow of doubt on your face, his head tilting to the side as he waited for your answer. You could sense the change of heart in your loved, the whites of his eye flickering red. Were you certain? Perhaps not fully, but it wouldn't be the first time you did something utterly foolish for love. A sharp hiss left his lips when you nodded, his gaze drifting to the now healed marks on the column of your throat. With a shaky hand he moved your hair over your shoulder and you craned your head to the side, offering him get a better look at your neck. Alucard could see the pulse thrumming under your skin, the vein swelling with each beat of your heart and suddenly you were both aware of the silence surrounding you, as if time itself had frozen. The only sound was Alucard's breath, cold on your skin when he leaned closer, his eyes piercing through yours. "It will hurt, you know?" he hummed, his voice gruff.

"But you will be gentle, right?"

With a last nod, the dhampir swiped his tongue over his lips, dipping his head to your throat. It began with a sting, his fangs piercing your skin, drawing a thin stream of blood but soon enough a scorching pain spread through your body. Choking out gasps, your body shuddered and his hold tightened. His senses were sharper, the sound of your heartbeat rumbling through him, your blood hot and tangy in his mouth. He had fed on enough beings before to know the exact moment when their lives began to fade– a sudden jerk of the limbs, a skip of heartbeat before their body grew limp. Lifting his head from your neck, he dragged his teeth along his wrist, the blood on his lips mixing with his as it dribbled out onto your dress, staining it crimson.

Through your blurry vision you could make out his hazy frame, white hair haloing around his head. Your mouth felt dry, chest tight. It hurt to breathe, hurt to blink, hurt when Alucard's cold blood dripped down your cracked lips onto your tongue and you choked.

"No, no, you must drink." pressed the dhampir, his voice dissonant as if he was underwater. He moved his wrist to your mouth again, jamming it between your lips and pushing your head back so you could swallow more easily. With his free hand he cradled your head, shushing you. He knew how excruciating the pain was, how straining the metamorphosis could be. Your skin grew colder, paler, eyes darker, nails sharper– tearing apart the material of his cape where you clutched onto him. And despite the pained screams and writhes he held you close, pressing bloody kisses to your face. His stomach churned, brows pinching when he felt your fangs growing, dipping into his wrist as you drank greedily. When a soft gust of wind swept through the crown of the tree, white petals clung onto your dark hair like little stars on the night sky. Terrifyingly beautiful, even like this you were enchanting, your lips glistening red when you finally pulled away, breathing heavily.

The wild look in your eyes mellowed when your gaze met his, your grip loosening. Alucard tilted his head to the side, a relieved smile etching itself on his lips. "Just breathe, easy, sweetling. You handled it so well." he whispered, breathing in the blood on your breath.

And then you wrapped your arms around his neck, dragging him on top of you. A hand braced itself next to your head, his mouth meeting yours halfway. You could taste each other on your tongues, teeth clashing, his hands gripping at your dress, your your back, your hips. With a sharp exhale, you slipped your hands along his jacket, tugging him closer. Your dress, now soiled with dirt and blood was crumpled at your hips, the shadow of the cross on the steeple now right over your bodies.

Pulling away for a moment, the dhampir sighed shakily, his eyes drooping as he gazed down at you– so wild, so deadly, so beautiful, still so you. "We must go soon if we want to make it back to the city before dawn." he hummed and you nodded. "We have all the time we need now, don't we?" you whispered back, like a hushed secret, closing your eyes and dipping your head back, open, wanting. Like a flame, you drew him in and he let himself fall into you and all it took was a breathy I love you spilled from his lips to know that he was truly yours. Indeed, you were right- you had all the time you needed, now and forever, finally as one.

tags: @virtuapicklequirkreader @pinkberryfox @nwjsns @mxyarylla @jjjjaneee333