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letsdiscoverkitty · 3 years

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"Life" Update - May 2021

This is the last of the three updates I have to post at the moment. If anyone actually reads these, especially in one go, you really do deserve a medal and I have no idea what I have done to deserve your kindness and support but THANK YOU SO MUCH (to all of you who are here, you are all truly wonderful and amazing) Okay, let's get going....

I suppose the title is a bit, well, overkill. To say that anyone has been had any sort of "life" over the past year would be a huge misuse of the word. The global pandemic has, quite literally, turned life upside down for the vast majority of people and I know that lockdowns, especially in the UK, have meant that anything other than what was deemed "essential" has been off the cards, which has hit us all hard.

I personally found it quite difficult whilst I was in hospital as although on the one hand it was good to know that there wasn't much that you were missing out on whilst locked on a ward with 15 minutes fresh air (if you were lucky), it did make it hard to find/hold onto motivation at times. Coupled with the fear of how my dad's condition would progress, whether he would make it and what sort of home life I would be going back to; the world suddenly felt even noisier than it had before (which I didn't think was really possible). The situation seemed to further heighten my fears as well as add to them. I found my mind was swamped with so many questions and fears, to then be asked about my future/what I wanted to do with my life (that classic question) and what my motivations were to get better, was too much. I fell blank.

I had completely lost myself and any shed of hope that was left inside of me. I tried to put on a smile; paint a different picture to the outside world but inside I was dark. I was hollow. I was empty.

What was the point? You never know what is waiting around the corner; everything can turn upside down overnight. What kind of 'life' would there be going back to anyway? Would it be possible to go to University anymore or would there still be multiple restrictions in place? would that make the huge financial costs worth it? What sort of society will we be coming out of the pandemic anyway? Will we even come out of this? Will people ever go back to offices again? Will we be able to see friends soon or go out to places? What about travelling? Fun? LIFE?

I found depression swamped me more than ever after dad's accident. I was trying to hold myself together for mum but I was losing all hope of anything ever being 'the same' or 'okay' again. In the end, the only reason I accepted the admission was for mum - I wanted to be able to support her with dad in hospital and us not know what the future held; as much as I wished I could be there all the time, I knew in the state I was that I couldn't. Initially I was told the admission would be a short one, that I could then go back home to support my mum through the family trauma...but that 4 weeks soon turned into over 8 months, which I still can't believe.

Gosh, I am sorry, I seem to have got a little distracted. This was meant to be the POSITIVE update. So let's get to those bits...

NEWS ONE: I HAVE A JOB (starting in Sept)

So whilst in hospital my consultant kept trying to get me to think about what I wanted to do with my life (just the small questions you know *lol*) - in her eyes she thought it would be risky to go back to University to do neuroscience/a degree so intense, and that instead I should think about doing something more creative, taking small steps to get a part time job and then go from there - which, as much as I hated to admit, I agreed with. However after one particularly bad run-in with the nutritionist when she decided to tell me that she didn't think I could achieve a life beyond Anorexia (it must have been mid-way-ish through my admission) blah blah blah (I get that she could have been trying to motivate me but there is a way to go about it and then there are ways to really not go about it and she chose the latter). Anyway, I was rather angry/mad and ended up doing basically trying to prove everyone wrong and started doing some research into my different options...

Long story short: I ended up applying to a degree apprenticeship scheme in business management...I've never really considered something like this before, perhaps partially because at school they drilled into me that business was a "soft" subject as it would not be looked upon very highly for Oxbridge applications *rolls eyes*. Thankfully I did a lot of research into Degree Apprenticeships a few years ago so I knew where to look online. Anyway, back to this application. I ended up going through the process/tests, somehow managing to make it through the initial online stages, then just before I was discharged I was invited to a online interview!

I only had a few days to do the interview before it timed out so I actually ended up doing it In the end the day after I was discharged (not ideal) and I was convinced that I had messed it up as it was one of those ones where you get shown the question for around 30 seconds before being given 2 minutes to respond - i.e. stress.pressure.anxiety.stumbling over words. HORRENDOUS.

I somehow passed the interview and the reviews before being invited to an online assessment centre in Feb, which spanned a whole day and included multiple interviews (the first was a strengths based interview with 2 interviewers for just over an hour - yuck!!!) as well as a presentation which we were given 24hrs in advance to prepare for (we were given 4 'topics'/questions and had to answer all of them in a 15 minute window using aids if we chose to, again to 2 (different) interviewers before having a 45 minute further interview - double yuck!)

Dare I say that I actually enjoyed the preparation for the presentation and the interviews?! It was so nice to have a focus and something to be working on that I was actually really beginning to connect with/want/see myself doing. The interviews and presentation themselves? HORRIBLE but the process reignited something within me. After the assessment centre day we were told it could be 7-10 working days to hear back from them - waiting for anything like this is just the worst so I wasn't looking forward to it and tried not to get my hopes up as these schemes are ridiculously hard to get into... Well, I got the call the next day saying that they were so impressed and out of something like 14,000 applications, I was offered one of the spaces on the scheme!! - I honestly still can't believe it and imposter syndrome is v real -

I know at the beginning of this I sounded very blase about the whole thing but as I progressed through the process, as I read more about the scheme and the business and what it would entail, the more I began to get excited. The more I realised how interesting it was and what an amazing opportunity it would be for me.

Despite this, I was also at the time, finishing up yet another an application to University (for the millionth time, I swear I must be a pro at these personal statements by now) this time for psychology and behavioural studies. This was before I got the offer of the degree apprenticeship scheme, which I knew was a long shot with only a handful of places given for thousands of applicants, so I felt I had to keep my options open (Neuro is still an area of fascination to me but not so much with the INTENSE LEVEL of physiology and pharmacology that I was doing at Bristol. Yes bits of it were good and interesting but that degree was ridiculous and, again, I felt far more drawn towards the behavioural studies and psychology when researching into Universities). I ended up getting 3 offers, 1 interview for Cambridge and 1 rejection (ironically from Bristol, even with my recommendation/support being from my previous personal tutor at Bristol!) - so I suddenly had options. And then the offer from the degree apprenticeship came through and there were even more options to choose from.

It honestly felt so surreal (and still does).

In the end, after a lot of thinking and debating and researching and talking, I decided to withdraw my University application and I accepted the degree apprenticeship role. Overall it is such an incredible opportunity that I knew I couldn't turn down, whereas University will always be there. I am actually getting a little excited about it (as well as extremely nervous, but I must say that the company has made a really positive/good impression thus far, even as far as creating MH podcasts with a psychologist for us and offering things like zoom baking sessions!).

So what is this degree apprenticeship? In short, it is a 3 year course during which I will have a Monday to Friday job at the company (for which the office is actually commutable from home - it is about 1hrs drive, which is not the best but it does mean that I can stay at home for at least the first year and there is a train I could get if I was too tired to do the drive all the time. As much as staying at home is not my long term plan it might help with the transition back to work/education to have a bit of stability and the support). During the first 2 years at the company we do four separate 6 month rotations in different areas to get lots of experience (marketing, supply chain, sales etc) whilst in the final year you get to put in a preference for where you would like to work for the year long placement. During this, every 6 or 7 weeks, we have to spend a week at University (which is not in commutable distance at all so the the company pays for our accommodation, travel and food during this time). As far as I have been told, we also get time during the working week allocated to do Uni work as well as our standard 'desk' jobs. Oh and not to mention one of the biggest sellers for degree apprenticeships....the company is basically sponsoring you so pays ALL of your tuition fees PLUS a basic salary! This means that you come out, in this case, with a Chartered business management degree, 3 years of hands-on work experience, as well as you being pretty much guaranteed a job within the company AND no student debt!!! How incredible is that? PLUS one big perk of the job is that they allow dogs in the office - I mean how could I say no to that?!!!!

So yes, by some magical miracle I actually have a job lined up for September! It still doesn't feel real and I am yet to fully process it. They don't know how it will be affected by COVID but the company did continue the programme last year (unlike some that postponed) so fingers crossed all should be going ahead. I have 'met' the other 4(?) who are on the scheme at my office as well and they seem lovely (including one other person who is my age/slightly older - which was such a relief as I was worried about it being only people just out of college).

I realise that it is going to be tough, I do not underestimate that at all, but I couldn't let anorexia still yet ANOTHER life milestone and opportunity away from me. There was a lot of questioning as to whether I should take it or not; I went back and forth between many spreadsheets that I made but I think this opportunity far outweighs going back to University. I have tried that route twice already and had to leave because of everything/haven't really coped (I think in some ways, being at Uni there is TOO MUCH free time and it allowed my perfectionism to run riot as I always felt like I was 'behind' in one way or another?). And that is not to mention that if I was going back to University, I would need to spend another 3-4 years studying, I would leave with little work experience or job in mind at the age of 29/30 with a mountain of debt.... And as I said before, I can always go back to University if I want to in the future/re train if I decide to, but this opportunity with a global company, well, this will never ever come my way again.

So yes that is my BIG BIG news. But I also have one more bit of news....

I'm getting a kitten. Yes, A KITTEN!!!!! I have so much more to say on this but for now you will have to wait and see. Photos will come when SHE does (a couple of weeks now)!!!

#personal #update #long #sorry I am no good at writing short posts anymore #well I never was #but this is my big news #TWO BITS OF BIG NEWS #ive still been baking and crocheting #and have taken up some gardening #and just generally trying to muddle through each day to be honest with you

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shytiff · 4 years

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Small July Wins

1 - atikah and racheel came over, oa webinar (rheumatology), duolingo (DL)

2 - they ended up sleeping over, DL, "attended" pak Kus' webinar just becausee hes my skripsi advisor

3 - a page of padi cbt, idai webinar (respiratory disease in covid era), DL

4 - ran 3 laps in my house complex (afterwards my heart was pounding against my chest), hopecardis webinar (arrythmia), DL

5 - 1 ma article (moluskum kontagiosum), perkani webinar (congenital heart disease), DL

6 - DL, idai webinar (pregnancy and newborn stuff in covid era), put sheet mask on lol i neglect my face a lot lately

7 - accompanied juan with mom to perbanas institute for sbmptn, while waiting we went to lucky cat and imeri to get apd, picked up juan, went to social pot (kokas) afterwards, DL. Lucky cat was empty, the vibes of a cafe felt new to me (it surely has been a while). I felt super refreshed. Did some writing for ma article there. Tried salmon and black olive spaghetti, caesar salad, mom drank piccolo. The spaghetti kinda tasted like mi telor but with salmon lol. Talked and laughed plenty with mom :) i rarely talk with her nowadays. Im glad the awkwardness melted away

8 - videocalled with apa salahku for gaby's birthday, zoom for school prep (covid safety stuff), a bit of cbt padi, DL

9 - negative rapid test alhamdulillah, fk digital (kejang anak), cbt padi, DL

10 - some exercise, talked with shiko on zoom, DL, aand since i started padi CBT i finished 2 tryouts (150 questions). It’s not a lot but Im proud of myself :)

11 - went to tj duren with ara, but while we wait the n95 seller we went to citraland, tried fried salmon roll at shigeru, ended up meeting the guy at cl, afterwards we got pisang goreng madu bu nanik, went to rodalink pesanggrahan, ended up getting seirockya at puri, and then i dropped ara off at tj duren. Theeen i went to devis place to hang out and sleepover. Lots of foods. Delicious "lava cake" made from instant brownie mix. Played werewolf. In the morning i managed to finish the pre and post tests in OCI Covid. Happy tummy and laughter :) i hope i can be more productive after this

12 - DL (thank god i freezed streak for weekend because i completely forgout about it yesterday), during sleepover @ devi’s we watched love for sale, a copy of my mind, and love for sale 2. The frustration is real bruh we rly wanted to know more about Arini. Did UKDMA (2 attempts, score: 24, 58), wrote 1 MA article, sorted my downloads folder a bit. After ‘wasting’ (happy times is never a wasted time but still, there’s stuff to do) my time yesterday i felt more urge to do something useful

13 - actually started my day with DL and padi cbt wow (brain still fresh from sleep), CBD about BPPV with dr Widayat. Since ive experienced one before i asked and asked and asked lmaooo. Packed up some of the stuff for tomorrow, hoping to not forget things. Read the journal for litrev before bed

14 - DL, first day of school after a while -- turns out weight distribution is key to avoid sore butt LOL. You kinda have to also support your body weight on your feet. Theres no sore butt at all during my 50 mins trip (amazing feat if you ask me). Went to poli rhinologi (DPJP: dr niken) she kindly gave me a patient to examine, and casually told me to put anterior tampon. I, who have never attempted it, was holding back my fear of trying something new lol. Alhamdulillah, i can somehow do it (even though one tampon fell, tiffany paboooo). The ppds kindly explained stuff to me and i feel like i shamelessly ask nowadays. Like it would be a waste not to ask something. Next was CBD @ Ara’s, we ate Ayam Bakar Mas Walid. Liqo with kak Kartika.

15 - DL, did litrev in the morning bcs i fell asleep lmaoo, tweaked tumblr a bit (i like low contrast the most), fell asleep while watching larynx anatomy video until 1:30 pm yalll i missed half of cbd. Tried to read stuff for poli larfar tomorrow.

16 - DL, ppds i met today lives in poris and worked at puskesmas kalideres lmaoo. Had a bit of headache and gassy stomach that felt better after sleeping and eating. thank god i was picked up by mom and theres food and stuff. i guess the difference of being at home and kosan is that you kinda remember more who youre fighting for. my mind felt healthy-ish lately, of some sort. but the headache made me sluggish

17 - DL, nevermind about the healthy mind part lmaoo

18 - DL, physical activity, padi cbt (after 200 questions i was today years old when i realized there were answer keys on telegram 👁️👄👁️), read optima tht batch 1 2020. Watched khs playing chess blindfolded against try guys and then i was purely amazed by what the human brain can do. It somehow motivated me to study lol

19 - DL, finished optima pem tht batch 1 2020, made 1 cbd ppt, webinar "holistic skin rejuvenation", free mindset tryout

20 - DL, haven’t got minicex but at least im trying to stay hopeful!1!, read the notes from today’s cbd since i basically only heard the whole thing on my motorbike like a podcast, did nasal irrigation n took a slow release vit c

21 - started the day with some stretches and squats, trying to drink more water!!, listened to kak dela's tips for ukmmpd from mindset, DL, read a bit abt epistaxis, the clear wallet i ordered from china finally arrived, edited 1 buku pld article

22 - was in poli onko this morning w ara, a patients consciousness was decreasing so code blue was activated. Finished poli at 1 am. It's been awhile since I last saw emergency situations. Went to maison weiner, ate almond croissant there and bought chocolate sourdough and chicken pie. Despite not getting minicex, the road home was not hot, the sun hidden away. The wind is breezing, podcast is on, talking about mindfulness. Todays quite a good day. Im healthy, insyaAllah. I hope my family will also stay healthy. Woke up at 11ish pm, DL, made my ppt for lcbe exam ((tomorrow)) til 1 am

23 - DL, lcbe exam with dr arie (turns out he picked epistaxis over sinonasal tumour), met up with racheel devi silvi at mcd and jco. Hojicha oreo mcflurry tasted good. Got lost on the way to racheels house lmaoo. She flies to malang tomorrow. Can i wish for life to stay simple and happy forever?

24 - DL, originally meant to be a minicex session turned out to be story time by dr Ezzy, she told us about cases that she managed, one of them is putting on tracheostomy for a baby with Moebius syndrome that went viral on twitter. We didnt even present our case and she only asked us for the scoring form. Thank you doc our lifesaver :”” after trying so hard for minicex the last 2 days turns out maybe its fated so we can meet and be inspired dr Ezzy. Mom picked me and we went to Maison Weiner before going home. Passed out from 6pm until the morning lmao

25 - a bit of exercise, DL, tried kemonyu.id mentai from duta garden, i’ve had better mentai than it but at least its on promo. it uses butter rice so that’s something new to me. rapat nemo to decide dates

26 - DL, liqo with kak Kartika about things you can do in Dzulhijjah, A2, started reading optima pem dv batch 1 2020

27 - DL, round was cancelled bcs no patient, lazed around and slept and lazed, continued reading pem dv optima, did like a half of 1 pamela reif video and my HR soared in 2 mins lmaoo

28 - DL, finally mustered the will to finish DS etika profesi, finished reading optima pem dv batch 1 2020, 2A, did 1 pamela reif video (titled 10 mins calorie burn that wont kill u), read a bit of my dv notes

29 - DL, ppds at poli were so kind!, ate shabu2 by mom and basically fell asleep

30 - DL, made ppt PKL, alhamdulillah PKL went ok with dr ika

31 - watched annabelle comes home and suicide squad with keisha karin juan, DL, relatives came to our place, ara also came for a sleepover and after i picked her up we went to dajens place lmaoo they set up bbq

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mubal4 · 4 years

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Wrapping It Up – The 4 x 4 x 48 Challenge

We are living in unique times. Interesting way to describe this I guess, but it is unique. Globally, we have pivoted, adapted, and by this time, created some new normals or at least different ways of doing things. Likely, some good habits have been formed and some may have gone back to some old tricks 😊!! I know I have consumed more beer and types of foods over the last two months than “normal.” 😊 It is all good though; based on what I’ve been fortunate enough to see, via social media, Facetiming/Video conferencing with family/friends, or just talking with folks, we’ve been overcoming these “unique” times well. Although changes have been made, one thing that has remained consistent for me is running. Overall, in the last 2+ months I don’t believe I am running farther or more. Like most of our lives, I’ve just changed some things up a bit. Part of that has been due to timing and circumstances with the quarantine and social distancing; some because the type of race I have coming up in July; and part because some shit has just gotten boring to be honest. So, when I saw this David Goggins Challenge video come across my Twitter feed, it grabbed my attention.

You can watch the 1-minute video, but it is basically running 4 miles, every 4 hours, for 48 miles. It was pretty cool how he positioned it too; “if you can’t run, walk; if you can walk; do pushups…….” It seemed like his intent was to just to get people moving, out of their comfort zone, and adapting to the nonsense. Since I am training for a 100-miler I thought this would be a great training exercise for a number of reasons. Obviously, the mile over two days, sleep deprivation, nutrition planning, and one big differentiator, life commitments!!! In the race, I won’t be thinking about family responsibilities, work, or puppy stuff 😊; it is just left foot, right foot. Since I started this on Thursday afternoon, I still had some conference calls to attend, work commitments, and family stuff so it added a layer. That said, as it relates to the family commits, Robin, as per usual, and the girls, sacrificed a ton, not only with dinners and puppy stuff, but, at least for Robin, sleep too. Thursday and Friday nights, I headed out at 1030pm and 230am. The first session each night, Robin was just about headed to bed but at 230am she was sleeping, and I tried to be as quiet as possible, for her, as well as for the puppy too 😊. It was nice to hear on Saturday morning once she woke up that that nights 230am session, she didn’t even hear me leave or come back. Guess all these years doing these crazy things it is good her mind is at ease while I run around Phoenix at 230 in the morning 😊😊😊!! That all said, none of this really came to mind when Robin and I discussed doing it. All I thought was 4 miles, every 4 hours, for 48 miles? I can do that!! So, at 230pm on Thursday, we got things started, easy peasy and session 2 at 630pm was awesome with a sunset, late afternoon run; I was in my happy place. All good. Got back and had a quick dinner (I will get into the nutrition in a moment) and we all were just chilling on the couch. Now, typically, Robin and I are toes up in bed by 10pm so, as my body clock was telling me, right around 945pm I started dozing a bit on the couch; fortunately, I had an alarm set just in case. But the thing was, I was setting an alarm for 1010pm to go out and run 4 miles at 1030pm. Needless to say, as I was tying my shoes, my comment to Robin, “why the hell did I commit to this; this is f#$%ing stupid.” She wished me a “have a good run, I will be sleeping when you get back.” 😊 The thoughts of feeling sorry for myself were quickly gone as soon as I started session number 3 and the night air, cooler temps, and darkness provided a different perspective to my run. I wanted to run around our area of town just to see what was happening, if there was anything happening. Out here in AZ, the stay at home orders are being lifted and there are a couple of restaurants/bars I would be running by so I was intrigued to say the least. There were still a few folks out walking at that time and traffic was light; however, this one bar, about 1 mile from our house, was packed. I guess the regulars were just waiting for things to be lifted. I went by again on Friday nights 1030pm run too and same deal. I giggled a bit but it also gave me a sense of relief that maybe things are working toward “normal.” Also, won’t lie, a beer sounded good at that time.

This is where adapting needed to happen because my body and internal clock was not going to be used to these next 30 or so hours. Running the initial 12 miles from 230pm through 1030pm wasn’t much out of the realm of my comfort zone. Now, I was getting home at 11pm, trying not to wake up Robin and the dog (the girls were still up doing what teenage girls do at that time 😊), getting fluids in, getting cleaned up, and getting things ready for 230am…….& hopefully trying to get sleep. Well, I was a bit amped up from the run so I thought that sleep was going to be tough. I got cleaned up, got plenty of water in me, and then figured I would watch some TV to put me to bed. Well, that worked, and I fell right asleep and woke up about 90 minutes later. Interestingly getting up at this moment and getting out was much easier than at 1030pm. Not sure why but it was. The run, however, was a bit weird and at both 230am sessions. I kept these 2 runs close to the house around this 1.35-mile loop. I didn’t want to stray to for, well, since it is 230am. On the first loop, Thursday, I guess this would be Friday morning, I first heard a rooster crowing!! Yep, a rooster – we don’t live near any farmland. On the second loop, I heard what I thought was a leaf blower…..@ 230am? What the hell? Then, the most interesting thing happened on the last loop. I was on this one road, drive it daily, and I white SUV pulls out of a side street. Okay, at that time of night, could be going to work, coming back, whatever. They pull out but just turnaround and head back where they came. My first thought was that maybe they were scouting out homes/cars to break into or something or, maybe they were just drunk. No big deal. I finished up the run and went home; didn’t think about it. However, 24 hours later, on that same loop at that same time, same car, same spot, pulls out, now we are going towards one another, it stops…………I kept running, faster now and find a dark spot on the road, click off my headlamp and stop. The car was already moving but then did the same thing, u-turn in the middle of the road. This was a bit freeky man and it was on my first loop too. I was running by there two more times. Holy shit right!! Well, nothing happened but it was just some weird stuff. I told Robin yesterday afternoon that I was going to go up there all next week at 230am, dressed in all black and see what happens 😊.

That was pretty much the only excitement of the event. Back to Friday morning, since the nature of this event, getting time on the trails was difficult but did go out at 630am Friday. Got on the trail, got some climbing in and it was a beautiful day. Stopped to take a shot of the trails from the top that I shared above. Also was able to get out on the trails Friday night and Saturday morning. Friday night I was able to meet a nice rattlesnake too!!! By “meet” I mean he was on the side of the trail and scared the poop out of me. I never did see him, just heard him. Not sure if I would rather face the white SUV or the rattler? The remaining sessions were all, pretty much, uneventful; just getting them done and keep moving forward. Overall, it was a great challenge and believe awesome training on many fronts. Although there wasn’t much climbing, it did offer a number of different layers that will definitely help come July. Want to again thank Robin and the girls for all the support, sacrifice, and help they provide me during these nutty things I do. All the folks that reached out via text, calls, or the FB live sessions, thank you very much. Very inspirational and you guys helped keep me going.

Haven’t been much into statistics and stuff when it comes to these kinds of things. Hell, up until January I was still using my 20+ year old Ironman stopwatch but Robin got me this Garmin one for Christmas and it has been fun to sort of geek out with it. So, for those that may be interested, I am providing some “noticings” from the 4x4x48 event. Thanks again for keeping me going and following along 😊!!

· Started at 230pm 5/14 and ended at 1059am 5/16 – total hours = 44.5-ish!

· Total miles = 48.7

· Total running time = 433 minutes (7 hrs 13 mins) – thought this was interesting that it was an exact number. Zero seconds after added up 😊

· Average pace = 8:53 (36:05 average for each 4ish mile session

· Total Vert = 1186

· Sleep = approximately 5 hours total

· 9 shirts & 7 pairs of shorts (yep – reused shorts – easy to do when you jump in the pool after a run), 12 pairs of socks, 3 different pairs of running shoes

· Food intake – 2 strawberry/banana milkshakes, 2 peanut butter/banana Clif bars, 2 apples, 1 grilled cheese, 2 hummus tortilla wraps, approximately a half a box of regular Cheeze-itz (original flavor), couple handfuls of peanut butter pretzels, 1 double expresso Clif bar gel

#4x4x48 - outsidethecomfortzone callousthemind preparethesoul beadaptable

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opepin · 7 years

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nov: week two

13: 5/6 pto day~ it was pretty gloomy outside so i felt a bit gloomy on the inside. kevin went to work and i woke up before he left. i ate another cinnamon raisin english muffin for bfast and then i hopped on my computer to update my tumblr. until i get my new gratitude journal, i am going to continue writing about my day, but i might change it up so that it’s bullet points again. we’ll see. i was pretty productive today. i finally decided on a gratitude journal to try it out and ordered it on amazon. then i chilled and watched some youtube videos and caught up on anime while eating lunch. after lunch, i digested a bit and then hit the gym. i thought i was going to spend it all in the yoga studio but i ended up needing to go to the fitness center so after glute activation exercises, i went across and did sumo squats and deadlifts. my legs felt so weak today. it could have been my form as well because my mind was scattered from going back and forth to the fitness center and yoga studio @_@; i managed to get through all the weighted exercises and then went back to the studio to do a burn out and hip dip exercises. i might have scared off someone in the studio, but i was in the zone so... ahha...

i came back, cooled off and stretched, and then showered and made myself a smoothie. i started prepping dinner and then kevin told me he left the office late so i just made dinner tonight. i made our spicy kale coconut fried rice and it came out pretty good (: i’m so happy with the outcome haha. kevin was also real happy to come home to a hot meal. it was nice. before cooking, i spent some time looking for my chocolate molds. they disappeared somewhere. i don’t know where they are :( i looked in all the small places as well as the storage room and no dice. kevin even looked with me after we ate :( sigh. i’m sad but i hope it will turn up somewhere. we asked the front to check our old apartment to see if we forgot it. i mean, it is transparent right? kevin went for a run after helping me look and i just continued looking until it was time to sleep. i was really bummed so i slept early. lol.

14: i got up at 7:45 am and then did my 30 minutes of stretching. it was nice and quiet in the morning and i felt like doing something but not cardio or anything of the sort. then i changed and made my smoothie for breakfast, said goodbye to kevin, and left for work. only john and haowei were in the office today. cole was waiting for a furniture delivery so he wasn’t in. mmm the moment i got on the train, i felt really sleepy. when i got into the office, i felt pretty kjsfnbkjsdf. i don’t know if it’s the heating, lack of people, etc. but i wanted to go home asap. there wasn’t much for me to do in the morning so i did some testing. then at around 11:50 pm, i ate my lunch and then packed up and headed to a chinatown market to get a carrot for our slaw tonight. i waited 10+ minutes to buy one carrot for 46 cents because the people in front of me chose to buy soy sauce that wasn’t entered into the system yet -____<” i mean it’s not their fault but the two other lines started moving faster after i was boxed into this line...

i got out and then rushed over to south station to get on my train. i waited 7 minutes for my train because it probably had left before i got to the station :( luckily, i got back at 1 pm and phil didn’t ping me about our meeting until i asked him if he was ready at 1:06 pm. we talked about next steps and upcoming sessions and then he went into a meeting and i continued to work while watching an episode of ‘jane the virgin.’ i got my blender bottle in the mail today! i washed the dishes as soon as i could so i could use it after my workout today. i also got kevin a ‘pre xmas’ gift! i saw that there was a christmas caroling and hot chocolate boat cruise so i got tickets for us because last year, he went on a team outing instead of the jazz cruise i booked for us (i took hillary instead because it made sense and we had funn!). so i thought it would be nice if he actually went this time~ hehe. kevin went climbing so after work, i cut up the carrot and cabbage and let it wilt with salt for about an hour while working out. i felt like doing a few cardio hip hop routines, standing abs, abs on a mat, and then ending everything with hip dip / bodyweight butt exercises. it was a good and fun workout. i finished seasoning the slaw after my workout and used my blender bottle to mix my protein with cashew milk. lol, the lid wasn’t locked in properly so i spilled a bit of my expensive af protein on the rice cooker and counter T___T on the bright side, everything was blended perfectly! tomorrow, i’ll try putting in some honey to see if it will mix well or not.

as i finished up with the slaw, kevin came back. we showered and then toasted burger buns, heated up the leftover pulled chicken, and ate small burgers for dinner. we were still hungry and i got an idea to make “curry buns.” i flattened out one burger bun, put leftover curry inside, sandwiched the curry inside and sealed the bread by pinching the outsides, and then pan fried it in butter. well, i did the stuffing and kevin did the pan frying. if we heated up the curry before pan frying it, i think it would have tasted better but it was fun cooking on the spot with kevin :3 <3 we split one and then i had a bite of kevin’s guava strudel while we watched the latest foodwishes video. we want to make his new soup video as well as his hasselback turkey breast video when we come back from thanksgiving. we cleaned up a little and then beat battleblock theater! omg the last few levels are so hard lmao. the ending was trololol but i think there will be a sequel. it was challenging and fun playing with kevin. :) we half-planned what to get our families for christmas (gift baskets for each of us visiting our families from harry and david).

then he gamed and i got ready for bed. this night, i was on my phone later than usual because i was chatting with daniel about working out with him when i get back, michelle about daylight savings dahkness, and chewy about us missing each other and i want to see her and i want to visit her so badly but ticket prices are so expensive from coast to coast T__T and then i did the thing where i stayed up on my phone doing nothing productive. if i got a new phone, i think i would spend more time on it, which is bad. lol. my oneplus one is my longest tech relationship with a screen (lol): 3 years and still going strong (well, my phone’s body is chipping).

15: i’ve been working out when i actually feel like it so i didn’t work out this morning and slept in :) i’m getting back to 7 hours of sleep now (more than once or twice a week)! kevin headed out for work and then i made my breakfast smoothie and started work. i’ve been craving warmer foods because it is colder now but my protein won’t taste as good if i put it in oatmeal or something. hmm, maybe i could just blend milk and protein and then eat an english muffin with pb and bananas on it. it’s a bigger breakfast but if it’s hot, i don’t think i would mind at all :) work has been chill this week because it is nearing thanksgiving and things are winding down for now. this day is a bit of a blur for me. i’m not sure what i did. i stayed at my computer for the most part until kevin got back home. i did talk to phil for a bit and then signed off and hurried to get the chicken thighs into the slow cooker. i didn’t realize it would take 4 hours for the slow cooker recipe. so i chopped up onions and garlic, put in the sauces and spices, and turned on the slow cooker. kevin got back early-ish but it he was in a heated argument with jon about sentencing. -___- this debate went on even after i went to sleep...

i snacked on edamame while kevin angrily typed away at his keyboard and waited for him to go to the gym with me. i knew it would take him more time to stop so i just left and did arms and back. i lifted mostly with 8s and 10s and took it slower this session. my arms are pretty flimsy and i still think my form is a bit off. i’m gonna check with daniel when i come back to chicago. after my workout, kevin was still debating. so i forced him to stop and go run and then i showered and added cornstarch to the thighs before it was done cooking 30 minutes later. i was pretty hungry by the time we ate. while kevin showered and cooked celery, i watched the beginning of season 5 of ‘mind of chef’ featuring ludo. lol kevin could see how excited i was and i kept gushing. i have 2-3 favorite chefs: david chang, ludo lefebvre, and christina tosi. i go nuts when i watch documentaries about them. lol. i now want to go to LA just to try all of ludo’s restaurants. instead of opening a big fancy restaurant, he went for a bit grungier strip malls in LA, which is fascinating. lol ok i’ll stop fangirling. we managed to get in a few games of helldivers before i rq’d and went to sleep because kevin would not stop debating with jon. i slept pretty late at 1 am (my phone dammit). i wrote in my gratitude journal that i just got as well. i want to think more positively. i think after this week, i’m going to stop updating my tumblr for a bit and just write in my gratitude journal.

16: i got up to go to work but after eating breakfast and changing my outfit twice, i really didn’t feel like going. so i changed back into my sleep clothes and worked from home. when it rains and looks gloomy and i’m not sure if my team is in the office, it makes me want to stay home. kevin got out of bed a bit later than usual so he went to work straight away. then i did a bit of work and phil pinged me with a new thing to do so i hopped on that. i worked on that until lunch time. then i ate lunch while watching youtube videos and downloading videos and movies to watch on my flight tuesday morning to chicagooo. after lunch, i anxiously waited for the eggie season ii drop. when it happened, i got a password screen and then all the items slowly came loading in. tbh, i wasn’t impressed :( mindy and i looked at the same time and she said she kind wanted the blur tee and i kind of wanted the oo dang long sleeve but $7 shipping is not worth for two shirts that are a bit pricey. we decided to wait for the next drop and bundle the shirts later. yeah, i had really high expectations. the season is inspired by the 2000s fashion, which i’m not a huge fan of, so maybe that’s why?

after that anti-climatic moment, daniel talked me into trying to bypass the $20 guest pass fee for his gym by live chatting someone for a free pass on his gym’s website. what he didn’t tell me is that they would call me and ask more and try to sell me their membership... man, i can’t lie. i feel so bad about it. :( i’m not gonna pick up sigh. i feel guilty for lying. anyway, i hopped on stand up and finished with the assignment phil gave me. the stand up took longer than i expected but after, i took a break to do some internet errands and stretches while watching more mind of the chef ft. ludo <3 after work, i made rice and chicken thighs for dinner. kevin came home and he made some chinese broccoli. hm i think today, i was feeling pretty moody. i watched some anime probably and some youtube videos while walking around the apartment. kevin went ahead and gamed with the guys. i think it was a pretty typical evening for us. we watched more ludo <3 while eating dinner and i continued watching after. hehe. i love this season.

17: today, i had a stressful day because of work. i didn’t work out in the morning but i ate my breakfast and then asked phil some questions and at the end of the conversation, i felt overwhelmed with the amount of videos i had to remake because of our monthly releases... so right after our talk, i hit the yoga studio. i started out with kickboxing with weights and then into hiit and a bit of legs. i ended up working out for over an hour. then i went back, drank a protein smoothie, showered, and ate lunch. i tried starting on my massive pile of work by figuring out how to streamline this process so that this won’t happen again. i like doing video tutorials but not when i am told i have to redo all the ones i’ve done because of small navigational changes... so i googled, researched, thought, brainstormed, etc about ways i can make this process easier for me and maybe for someone else in the future. i did this for a while alone until i decided to ask winston, kevin, and vivian for their ideas. winston actually video chatted with me for a while and it was nice catching up with him even though no solid solution came up. vivian gave me her best answer, which was plausible but not in the long run. kevin came back home and gave me two interesting ideas, but in the end, i had it in my mind that i had to remake all of them. oh well. it was the end of a week, so i set my mind to rest.

kevin brought me back sliders from his friday happy hour and we ate that while playing pokemon ultra sun and moon! i could have not worked a bit more and started playing but i wanted to start with kevin. we played a bit and then kevin went out for a run and then for dinner, reheated some broth to make korean rice cake soup. we watched ‘mind of a chef’ until i realized, that ludo’s season was only half of the season’s episodes... i forgot that this is how it was laid out after david chang in season 1. so we started watching the ‘best of’ episodes while eating. we ate the rest of our pomelo for dessert. we gamed for the rest of the night happily. we obviously, stayed up and gamed lol.

18: oh yes, we woke up late and we played pokemon in bed until we got hungry. then we decided to be responsible and went to do a quick grocery run. we just got edamame and bananas from bj’s because that’s what i eat on a daily basis lol. we got some ingredients to make caldo verde with the leftover kale in our fridge as well. kevin got me a slice of chocolate cake and some dark chocolate because i’ve been craving it like crazy. i know it’s going to be my time of month when i have a craving for rich dense chocolate cake lol. we also picked up chocolate covered wavy lays chips -- it’s a no. i ate it all but i would not buy again. lol. i would suggest getting ferrero roche instead. well, we got back and kevin felt like going climbing. i think we put everything away and then played more pokemon for a bit and then kevin went out. i tidied up a bit and got myself in the mood for working out. i wasn’t sure what i was going to do but i went to the yoga studio anyway. there was a girl facetiming someone in there... i felt awkward but i just did my thang in the corner while she did that. i don’t think she meant to go into the yoga studio for just that purpose because i heard her saying that he was interrupting her workout session. she left like 10 minutes after i started working out lmao.

i did full body strength today because i won’t have access to weights for most of next week. it was a good workout! i got back, made myself a smoothie, cut the potatoes and onion, and then washed some dishes. kevin got back, we showered, and he got to cooking caldo verde. i was pretty munchy at this point so i kept picking off the sausages lol. the soup turned out delicious! i think we ended up playing pokemon for the rest of the night. well, at least i did. i think kevin stopped and played hots before going to sleep. zzz.

19: today will be the last post before my gratitude journal break. we were bums again :P we played pokemon in the morning and then i was getting cramps and feeling out of it. i think we kept gaming for a while... ryan asked us if we wanted to game with him and terence and we ended up playing gauntlet together. after that, i started cleaning to be productive. at some point, i think kevin went for a run and then i worked out as well. we showered and then kevin made us fried rice with leftovers for dinner. after dinner, we digested a bit and then... hmm, maybe we ate then digested and then worked out, showered, and then cleaned the kitchen. lol. i am updating this on the 21st (when i stayed up to catch my flight to chicago) so i’m a bit out of it and 3 days ago is a lot @_@; anyway, it ended up being a really productive night. we cleaned everything and i got to rest a bit with my cramping and stuff. i tried going to sleep a bit earlier than we’ve been going to sleep because i needed to check in for southwest and get up to see the gymshark sales as well as take a call from kristen. yup. it didn’t feel like tomorrow was going to be a start to a new week aka work. i loved the way we spent this weekend just chilling and enjoying each other’s company. :)

20/21: okay, so that’ll be it for a bit. yesterday and today has been crazy. we spent monday working. i actually came up with a great game plan for the videos currently and worked a bit longer than i expected to -- i was on a grind though! we gamed together after eating dinner and when we left, we thought we had everything down, but when i got to chicago, i realized we didn’t take out the garbage... so i hope i don’t see a million fruit flies when i come back T__T i’m a bit worried but we’ll see! anyway, i stayed up yesterday because kevin’s flight to china left at 1 am and i wanted to go to the airport with him even though my flight left at 5 am. so after he went through security, i headed back to my terminal, brushed my teeth, and found a place to charge my phone. i started watching ‘psycho pass’ and i did stay up for the entire aiport process. i ko’d when i got on the plane. now it’s 10 pm and i am getting a bit sleepy. not sure if i want to do 10-15 minutes of abs anymore and/or play pokemon. i’m kind of ready to sleep. well, talk to you later, tumblr! thanks for being there for me and helping me document my life from sophomore year of high school until a year / two years after college graduation. it’s been real. i’ll be back in some way! <3

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thedivinefish · 5 years

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TGIWednesday with an order of Creepy Halloween and a shot of Mercury Retrograde

TGIWednesday News

Ugh, my least favorite day of the year. Lol. Oh and throw in Mercury Retrograde starting ON Halloween and you have yourself a straight up S-show. Although Friday will be All Saint’s Day so we’ll patch it all back up together to keep moving forward. My attorney friend and I go to the movies weekly and sometimes the trailers for Halloween movies are so bloody and bad he says, “Are you gonna clear us after the movie?” and I always reply, “Nope, I’m doing it right now!” If you watch 'Singing in the Rain' and happy-happy-joy-joy movies it changes your mood for the better... guess what happens when you watch hours of Halloween scary/gory ugh movies? Yep that’s right, you may feel paranoid or road rage-ish all the way home. People often find being Scared equals Excitement… even dress up parties and events are like movies in your mind…….So be careful what you dress up as while taking on that creepy persona can be fun/ exciting/scary, you’ll want to clear yourself as soon as you change out of it! Click below to watch the latest video with me and my friend Marla Martenson with new energetic clearings for all who watch, and spooky good vibes for Halloween & the full moon energy. Watch it here.

TGIWednesday Download

~ RELEASING THE DARK SIDE OF HALLOWEEN ~ (Press play to watch and listen as I fish this for you) Let’s get clear to Yes, unclear to No, running forward to Yes as I say it now. Let’s release ourselves from dark side of Halloween and from the calamities that can come from Mercury Retrograde. Let’s have fun instead, promote peace, calm and grounding. Believe, think, know and feel that I am incorporating the feeling of smooth in my life now. That I am ready, willing and able to stabilize my life and to steadily ascend from here. I will now know when, where, how and why to invite in the spirit of only that which is good. I am asking in all languages and throughout all time lines and so it is now.

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"Hi Jimmy! Wanted to thank you so very much for your help. Listed my house with Kevin the realtor, house went on mls late yesterday, Kevin had an open house today and he got me a cash, full-price offer today!! Wow oh wow!!! Thank you, Jimmy!!" - Karen / Florida "Thank you for the great session today, I was very impressed at how I got results instantly." - Dianna / Montreal

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I've been invited to return to Darius' show on TODAY October 30th at 4PM EDT for a Special LIVE Q&A call and we'll focus on Clearing Dark Energies including a new special process for clearing Halloween, political turmoil, climate unrest, and many other blocks and negativity. This brief process will take you out of the state of fear and into one of grounding and courage. I've enjoyed connecting with hundreds of new people that have found me from the summit and look forward to being with everyone again next week! If you haven't signed up yet or gotten the free welcome gifts - Register here now. EVERY TUESDAY at 9pm EDT - JIMMY MACK HEALING SHOW

Listen Here to Yesterday's replay – Rev Debbie Dienstbier Our resident Trans Medium communicating with your loved ones in spirit. UPCOMING GUEST FOR NOVEMBER: November 5th - Psychic Joanne Leo: Angel Cards, Numerology, Astrology and readings from the heart https://psychicjoanneleo.com/ November 12th - Melissa Parks: Psychic intuitive and radio show host Love Light and Miracles, Iammelissaparks.com November 19th - JoAnn Kisler: Masters Degree in Metaphysics and she believes that its important for all of us to heal from those things that no longer serve us in our life’s journey. an Empath, Intuitive, Spiritual Life Coach, Sound Energy Healer, Breath Work, Workshop Facilitator, Meditation/ Yoga Teacher, and Yhandi Inner Child Healing. www.breathofenergiahealing.com November 26th - Rev Debbie Dienstbier our resident trans medium specializing in communications with your loved ones in spirit. Visit Facebook page.

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The Jimmy Mack Healing Show will have a BRAND NEW call in number & online listening link starting on November 5th. We are moving from BlogTalkRadio to FreeConferenceCall.com. Shows will still be LIVE on Tuesday Nights at 9pm EDT w/replays If you want to Listen in only, go to this website: https://www.freeconferencecall.com/wall/goldylocksproductions OR If you want to call in & ask a question CALL (206) 806-9965 No need to press #1, just dial in and you'll be in the queue. Visit the TheJimmyMackHealingShow.com for a full archived listing & all replays!

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MONDAY NOV. 4th SWANN HOLISTIC HEALTH CENTER TAMPA I'll be doing in-person sessions on Monday November 4th from 10am-4pm at Dr. Charla Tempone’s new office in Tampa. 15 min/$38 and 30min/$68 sessions. **NEW ADDRESS** Swann Holistic Health Center Suite 200 1000 West Kennedy Blvd Tampa Florida 33606 Please call them directly to book if it's not already sold out (813)-873-7773 EVERY FRIDAY at KODAWARI YOGA STUDIOS TAMPA

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Call Kodawari's front desk directly to schedule (813) 773-4017 and pay at the concierge desk... 15 minutes 33$ or 30 minutes 65$. 3965 Henderson Blvd Suite C Tampa (813) 773-4017 http://www.kodawariyoga.com/ Book on Friday November 1st November 8th November 15th November 22nd

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The Certificate of Mastery Program includes 2 best-selling ebooks and 2 clearing audios plus written & video instructions, AND one-on-one time with Jimmy ALL for about the cost of a single 1-hr session! This online course is for anyone who is familiar with OR new to "fishing" and is ready to dive into the deep end & get results that are beyond the ordinary! It includes The Tackle Box & The Dowser's Handbook ebooks PLUS 2 MP3s "Clearing Dark Energies" & "Increasing Your Intuition" to help clear, strengthen and prepare your energy field for optimal “fishing” results. This is a work-at-your-own-pace curriculum that will TEACH & CLEAR you at the same time! In under 2wks you will be finished with the program and ready to fish on your own with greater results! Level II offers Practitioner Certification for those who qualify.

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You will send me a list of the members of your immediate household, and yes even pets, and I will add them to my daily prayers. I will arise daily before you are even awake to start my prayers and also run my intelligent computer software 24/7 deleting the negative and increasing the strength of the positive creating a higher probability of outcomes for you and the family. Each comes with a one-time email analysis print out via the intelligent healing software that I use on your behalf. Most clients have had amazing results and outcomes and I get emails of thanks each and every week!

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OCTOBER 30th "Today I will remain open to what shows up. Even if something seems bad, it could be a sign of the good to come from it. If I see that a topic has reached an all time low, it could be the phoenix and rebuilding that I am hoping and dreaming for today!"

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Find a topic that addresses your issue(s), click on the link to read more. We had a lot of help downloading & channeling these over the years & they keep getting better.

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divinefishingtips · 5 years

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TGIWednesday with an order of Creepy Halloween and a shot of Mercury Retrograde

TGIWednesday News

TGIWednesday Download

From the Fish Box

FREE Weekly LIVE Healings and Messages

JOIN ME TODAY at 4pm EDT - YOU WEALTH REVOLUTION

** STARTING NEXT TUESDAY - NEW CALL NUMBER, NEW LINK **

Live In-Person Appearances

Tampa folks come see me on FRIDAYs - I'm scheduling 15 and 30 minute appointments at Kodawari Yoga Studios from 10am-2pm.

Go deep sea "fishing" with Jimmy!

Level 1 is open to ANYONE at anytime! All Mastery Students: Check your email & Login to view all the newly upgraded content including new books and audios!

LEARN MORE HERE

Receive 24/7 Daily Prayers From Jimmy

I will dial into you daily in the wee hours and make certain that you are a CLEAR YES, UNCLEAR to NO and RUNNING FORWARD before you start your day.

Choose 7 days @$33 Choose 14 days @$66 Choose 30 days @$99

**Can't See The Full Email? Click Here to View Online**

Fish Food

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

Tell The Fish: 365 Daily Inspirations & Affirmations

For those who aren't familiar, here's the list of the MyBeliefWorks™ audio library.

Find a topic that addresses your issue(s), click on the link to read more. We had a lot of help downloading & channeling these over the years & they keep getting better.

Increasing Intuition IRS & Tax Time Love & Romance Money Mindset Moving Forward Pain Relief Pet Healing Sales & Success Sex Sleep Traveling w/Ease Work & Career Weight Loss Youth & Vitality

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365dailyaffirmations · 5 years

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TGIWednesday with an order of Creepy Halloween and a shot of Mercury Retrograde

TGIWednesday News

TGIWednesday Download

From the Fish Box

FREE Weekly LIVE Healings and Messages

JOIN ME TODAY at 4pm EDT - YOU WEALTH REVOLUTION

** STARTING NEXT TUESDAY - NEW CALL NUMBER, NEW LINK **

Live In-Person Appearances

Tampa folks come see me on FRIDAYs - I'm scheduling 15 and 30 minute appointments at Kodawari Yoga Studios from 10am-2pm.

Go deep sea "fishing" with Jimmy!

Level 1 is open to ANYONE at anytime! All Mastery Students: Check your email & Login to view all the newly upgraded content including new books and audios!

LEARN MORE HERE

Receive 24/7 Daily Prayers From Jimmy

I will dial into you daily in the wee hours and make certain that you are a CLEAR YES, UNCLEAR to NO and RUNNING FORWARD before you start your day.

Choose 7 days @$33 Choose 14 days @$66 Choose 30 days @$99

**Can't See The Full Email? Click Here to View Online**

Fish Food

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

Tell The Fish: 365 Daily Inspirations & Affirmations

For those who aren't familiar, here's the list of the MyBeliefWorks™ audio library.

Find a topic that addresses your issue(s), click on the link to read more. We had a lot of help downloading & channeling these over the years & they keep getting better.

Increasing Intuition IRS & Tax Time Love & Romance Money Mindset Moving Forward Pain Relief Pet Healing Sales & Success Sex Sleep Traveling w/Ease Work & Career Weight Loss Youth & Vitality

TGIFunny

Forward

-------------------------------------------------- TGIW newsletter managed by: Sandy Bidinger Digital Marketing Specialist at SMBeConnected Solutions www.smbeconnected.com

Stay connected!

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advancedthetapractitioner · 5 years

Text

TGIWednesday with an order of Creepy Halloween and a shot of Mercury Retrograde

TGIWednesday News

TGIWednesday Download

From the Fish Box

FREE Weekly LIVE Healings and Messages

JOIN ME TODAY at 4pm EDT - YOU WEALTH REVOLUTION

** STARTING NEXT TUESDAY - NEW CALL NUMBER, NEW LINK **

Live In-Person Appearances

Tampa folks come see me on FRIDAYs - I'm scheduling 15 and 30 minute appointments at Kodawari Yoga Studios from 10am-2pm.

Go deep sea "fishing" with Jimmy!

Level 1 is open to ANYONE at anytime! All Mastery Students: Check your email & Login to view all the newly upgraded content including new books and audios!

LEARN MORE HERE

Receive 24/7 Daily Prayers From Jimmy

I will dial into you daily in the wee hours and make certain that you are a CLEAR YES, UNCLEAR to NO and RUNNING FORWARD before you start your day.

Choose 7 days @$33 Choose 14 days @$66 Choose 30 days @$99

**Can't See The Full Email? Click Here to View Online**

Fish Food

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

Tell The Fish: 365 Daily Inspirations & Affirmations

For those who aren't familiar, here's the list of the MyBeliefWorks™ audio library.

Find a topic that addresses your issue(s), click on the link to read more. We had a lot of help downloading & channeling these over the years & they keep getting better.

Increasing Intuition IRS & Tax Time Love & Romance Money Mindset Moving Forward Pain Relief Pet Healing Sales & Success Sex Sleep Traveling w/Ease Work & Career Weight Loss Youth & Vitality

TGIFunny

Forward

-------------------------------------------------- TGIW newsletter managed by: Sandy Bidinger Digital Marketing Specialist at SMBeConnected Solutions www.smbeconnected.com

Stay connected!

Our mailing address is: Clearwater Florida 33756 USA

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cosmosogler · 7 years

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hi guys! i got home after 9. so i am six minutes late starting this post. 10:06 i mean.

anyway god dang it! i forgot my dream again. i think i was thinking about math and statistics though. numbers are super hard in dreams though because all the information changes and melts between instants.

i got up at a reasonable time- 7:40. still got out of the shower super late though. i’m not even sure what takes so long! maybe it’s because i brush my teeth and blow dry my hair and everything in that span of time so it’s not just “hopped in the shower at 7:50 and oH GOD IT’S 8:15.”

i tried to have a bigger breakfast than usual- i had a bagel and some bacon i put in the microwave. and a big glass of orange juice. i watched snoopy roll around in a patch of sunlight while i ate.

then i biked to campus a little late. i was super thankful that the light on the busy road happened to turn green right as i approached. if you miss it it’s a 2-minute wait for the next cycle.

i used my lecture notes today when i started the lab period!!! people started working on their labs while i was talking though and i got a little discouraged. i’ll need to ask for feedback over email i think. maybe it’s still good to lecture so that the people who already know what’s going on can get started while the people who are still a little confused have some basis to start from.

some questions really get me turned around though. i feel kinda stupid when i have to check my notes on the lab to answer a question like “but are the forces REALLY always equal and opposite?” because i think i know an exception but really no i don’t. and then i have to explain why there are no exceptions and i try to draw on some experiences as an undergrad ta but i only remember half-sentences and bits of anecdotes and i have to try to string them together into a coherent explanation that is catered toward intro physics courses.

i’m always exhausted afterward. i really give it everything even though i’m not the best ta.

i got scolded by my supervisor for getting suzanne to help me fix one of the computers when i couldn’t find him. what had happened was, i saw him talking to suzanne out the door earlier since the lab is across from the office. when i needed to find him i checked his office first, didn’t find him, and asked suzanne if she knew where he went. when she said the other side of the building she also offered to take a look because she’d been having a couple computer problems too on monday.

but a few problems i did fix myself fairly quickly. i don’t mind troubleshooting, but sometimes i have to stand there and process information and i get quiet and kind of stare into space and don’t move and then i feel dumb because i’m not actually thinking using any words.

maybe those are less “processing” thoughts and more “racing circular” thoughts.

ehhh afterward i went to my lab office hour. one of my students with the computer issues was in there trying to finish. he didn’t though.

during my office session i received an email from the grad advisor. he said every single first year grad student needed to be at a meeting right now. it was the end of my session anyway so i packed up and went over to the office to see if anyone else had caught the email.

they were actually all discussing it with an older graduate student. jennica was scrolling through every email she’s received on the student account to try and find any previous information about the meeting. there was none.

we talked about it for a few minutes before the older grad student went up to talk to him. jennica and harrison and i went to get some lunch and i picked a smoothie up for rebika.

actually that was funny. i asked her what kind she wanted and she said “i don’t know” so i said there were like a hundred and i would have to pick one at random so she better be okay with kale. she said whatever so jennica found an online random number generator.

anyway while we were out we got another email from the grad coordinator. this one was really passive aggressive and sent to the whole department about how no one showed up and the lady making the presentation had “come all the way across campus.”

i said “???” because this was well after the situation had been explained to him. i’m not sure why he was so mean about it when it was his mistake. we had literally never heard about this before and he told us to be there one minute before it started.

eventually suzanne found a reminder for it on her phone. we had to hack it to find out when she had actually set that reminder to give us an idea of where we might have heard about it.

it was during our “graduate welcome” presentation back in the middle of august. it wasn’t written down anywhere. it had just been mentioned in passing and suzanne made a note of it in her phone because it sounded interesting. not because we knew it was required.

my classmates complained that we’d never gotten any reminders for it but i was more annoyed that we hadn’t received any written notification of the event in the first place.

after that we studied a lot. i talked about some problems, fudged some math on the blackboard, and scribbled some stuff down on the homework problems i’d printed.

harrison has started telling me to “stop talking” whenever i say something depressing. jennica picked up on it pretty fast too.

during coffee/cookie time at 3:30 ish i was chatting with one of the upper classmen aboutttt star trek i think it was. i’ve never watched it but i know... enough to talk about it i guess. i ended up having a fun discussion with taylor about the boundary between sci fi and fantasy when he said star wars was the superior sci fi story.

i said it was based on how heavily it leaned thematically on hard science and logic to inform its worldbuilding. taylor said it depended on the setting.

anyway i was talking to the guy and i was maybe talking about how i’d burned myself on my tea and also spilled some on my shirt because i’d burned my face and flinched violently. i said “thank you for listening to my problems” and jennica was all “don’t get her started, oh god, unless you want to be depressed.”

i laughed and said “hey did i ever tell you about the time i broke my ribs?” and that got, i guess, a surprised laugh out of him. jennica gave me a Look. “just kidding, my ribs were too soft to break then,” i said apologetically-but-not-really.

i really relate to that short homestuck comic about dave talking about how his bro would leave him in the ball pit when they went to the store. except the ball pit was a slab of concrete in a dark room.

ok! i said my last prayers for the physics midterm and then at about 5:30 jennica and i played five rounds of love letters, adventure time edition. we were going to 3 wins and it stayed pretty close. i admitted that it’s a lot more active with three players and four gets to be a little too much. she seemed to like it well enough at least.

then at 6:05-ish i dumped all my trail mix in my mouth and turbo biked over to the drc to take my Accommodated Test in their Testing Facility. i almost got hit by a car while i was in the crosswalk. i was crossing at the same time as another bike, but as soon as he was past and i was approaching the end of the road, a driver slammed on the gas and i had to actually for real hard brake. i stared at her as she passed, she made eye contact with me. i don’t know why she did that if she saw me.

guess i’ll just go screw myself.

anyway i got there about fifteen minutes before the test was gonna start. there was trouble with the check-in devices so i was glad i got there early. i had time to get settled and put my stuff away and brush my hair a little bit to get the helmet tangles out.

then i took the test for two and a half hours! i was allotted three, and my classmates had two, so i think i made good use of the extra time and didn’t panic too hard.

i’d felt super sleepy and lethargic all day. the test wasn’t much better. but... i recognized all the problems at least. and i knew how to start all of them. and i had enough time to finish to my satisfaction.

i’m not gonna say i did well on the test. but i did way better than if i hadn’t studied. which is kind of a given, but. i think i tried more study strategies this time and asked for more help and maybe that made a difference. can’t say. i had no particular feeling about it when i looked over my work. i noted where i knew what i was doing and where i’d forgotten something, and where i’d probably made a mistake but had no idea what to do instead, and i really have no idea how i did.

i think biking home right after that though did a lot toward helping me not die of lack of energy. i had to bike up the big hill because of where i was leaving campus. that was ok though, i got up in no time at all! in third gear, even!!!

then i got home, and took out the trash, and devoured an ice cream sandwich, and then made some dinner. and then i sat down at my desk for 20 minutes, did a little e&m homework, sent some emails, and started writing, and then here i am.

five minutes left. i will try to talk about something good about me.

i uh... i was gonna talk about something ta-related but i can’t think of anything right now that i actually like about my method haha.

i’ve made a lot of progress this last week toward finding a study strategy that works for me. i know i have to use more than one of the study style fields to really learn material. two is good, three is better, four is overwhelming. i know that i am learning material on the backburner even if i don’t consciously feel like i understand anything because i look at some problems and i’m like “oh! i know what that is!”

still having trouble remembering relationships between equations. but i think that will get better the more time i spend looking stuff up over and over. like i really Get the yukawa potential and how that one equation basically provides a link between classical mechanics and e&m, and that’s so cool.

tomorrow i’ve got group therapy and it’s SPAGHETTI DAY. AGAIN!!!!!! but i also gotta start studying for that e&m test on friday. i need to figure out how to do that. maybe i will find and talk to adamya since he was helping suzanne the other day.

ok. it is 10:45. i will stop writing now and meditate for a few minutes and then go to bed. i need to get up a few minutes early to pick up a package. i think it is either the rest of my stuff i’ve been trying to get my parents to send for the last month, or it’s the cat food that i’m glad i ordered when i did and not a day later.

later guys, i hope you are well. drink more water.

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cosmosogler · 7 years

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hi it’s 10:30 so i’ll try to write fast. i’ll have to stop when my keyboard catches on fire though.

actually i don’t know what my max typing speed is any more haha.

last night i went to bed late... i couldn’t fall asleep. then i woke up a long time before my alarm went off so i just watched the sun rise. and by “watched the sun rise” i mean i watched as my window blinds got brighter and brighter and then snoopy started yowling like she does every morning at 5:30 am.

so i was tired and even more incoherent when i tried to teach my lab this morning. i asked everyone to turn to the wrong lab for the first five minutes even though i gave the correct lecture.

after that i actually tutored a few people at the help session for once.

then it was 1 so i had some lunch. then i worked on the classical assignment until 2:45 and turned it in!!! i made a joke to the professor and he kind of laughed at least.

i said “and now i’m going to read the textbook so i’m ready to do the next one on thursday.”

the joke is that they are due on mondays.

then i talked with my classmates for a while, until 3:10 or so. i quickly set up the first problem in my quantum assignment (due tomorrow) and then we all went upstairs for cookies and coffee. i went light on the caffeine and got mint tea instead. i put some honey in because my throat and deep in my chest hurts from coughing all the time. i don’t know if sweet and mint go together that well.

after that it was basically a straight run through from 3:40 to 8:10. i finished almost the whole assignment all by myself though! and i did it way faster than my classmates even though suzanne said i was doing it not the way we were supposed to.

i dunno. she was using something she called “compact form” but the way she and the others did it, it took like four hours. i used the expanded form because i understood everything that was happening way easier (even though it was a lot of writing at first, it all reduced down easily using the hints), and that took me about an hour and a half and i only had to ask for pointers twice to try to figure out what the question was asking for.

but now, like, keegan is asking for help and he’s using compact form and i just can’t read it or figure out what to do next with that. i dunno. i’m glad i could find a way for myself to understand the problem really well but i don’t know how to tell other people to do the really messy intimidating stuff at the beginning. it took me a few tries just because i lost track of how many 2s i was multiplying together sometimes.

i goofed around with suzanne and luis for a while and then at 8:35 i biked home. it wasn’t as... hard as it was the last few days, i guess? like my legs still burned all the way up the half-mile hill and i was out of breath, but also, it was easier to keep going somehow.

haha when i got off the bike though and had to run to the corner store for tissues i got real confused and frustrated that i wasn’t going fast, and i couldn’t go faster by pedaling my legs harder. i’m tired.

when i got home i saw that snoopy had used both her litter boxes today. i am so proud of her. while i made mac and cheese for dinner i gave her a pile of cookies and i brushed her and rubbed her ears for a while. she had a good time.

so then it was 9:40 ish so i caught up on tumblr and my comics and watched like two of the youtube videos i’ve bookmarked over the last week and then i listened to a song i like instead of doing anything. it’s so good though. it evokes a Mood.

now it’s 10:45. i usually get up around 7:30 so i do actually have a few minutes to take a breath...

ok now it’s 10:55 and i subjected my local discord channel to an avalanche of puns.

anyway i ain’t got nothin else today. tomorrow i need to find time to contact the group therapy doctor and see if i’m still... in the group i guess. she didn’t respond to my email last week. i’m going to try calling.

tomorrow is also my mother’s birthday. and i found out i can’t stay home for new year’s because the next preliminary exam is supposed to happen, like, on new year’s day.

(i just looked up “new year’s” and the first autocomplete suggestion was “new year’s puns”)

anyway, it’s 11, i’m going to get ready for bed.

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cosmosogler · 7 years

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considering i went to bed after 11 last night you can imagine how my waking-up-at-7-15 went.

i didn’t feel like working out so i just showered and got ready for the day. i switched the side my hair part is on just because i felt like it. instead of leaving for the department at 9:15 or so i instead decided to finish a comic i’ve been following that ended a few days ago. i was going back through the archives since it was ~120 pages long. it takes so much longer to read than it used to. in general, i mean.

didn’t have time for a taz episode today. i want to get through the live shows before i start the next arc (the suffering game) and each of those are 2 hours long.

i did leave for campus before 11 today though, which was better than yesterday. and i had finished reading a thing before i left so that was even better than yesterday! i didn’t FEEL better than yesterday though. when i did finally get into the office and sit down i had a lot of trouble settling in and getting focused. i still did like 6 work sessions... and i only stayed until 6 or so. i finished reading chapter 1 of my mechanics book, which is what the first homework (due wednesday) is based on. and i finished my quantum assignment (also due wednesday). so i am more than halfway done with the work due this week and we’re not even at tuesday yet. i didn’t start the mechanics assignment, because by the end of the day i was so agitated that i was gonna cry if i didn’t eat something. suzanne drove me home thankfully since i missed the last bus by about 10 minutes. i was going to make it, but then i forgot i needed to pack and kind of just sat there and quibbled over the last quantum problem instead until i realized i had forgotten to leave.

my brain feels... like i pulled something, i guess? like i have no thoughts when i try to think about mechanics. there is just nothing when i try to focus on what the words on the assignment mean. it’s so frustrating! but i really do need to rest.

mental fatigue is a thing i just discovered on google. maybe i knew about it before, but it feels new. even though the feeling itself is not new at all. memory problems, man.

so when i got home i immediately made myself dinner. then i caught up on some youtube videos i’d put in my bookmarks earlier. when it got to be about 9-ish i started working on a budget, now that i know exactly how much each paycheck is going to be.

it’s not much.

i actually don’t know if i will be able to afford both mine and snoopy’s medications long term. rent might be 30 dollars more than i think it is- the apartment’s web site lists a “30-dollar concession” for me that i’m not sure about. i don’t know if it’s from when mom and i accidentally paid a fee twice and now it’s just getting taken out of my first rent payment, or if it’s a monthly thing for some other reason (why is rent 30 dollars more than advertised on their site?).

anyway i made a really nice-looking budget excel sheet with colors and calculator tricks and tables! so at least SOMETHING got done this evening. something, like, work-related and not leisure-related.

tomorrow i gotta teach a two-hour lab, and then i need to call a dentist because my teeth really hurt. and i also gotta meet with my three professors about the accommodation letters, which could take anywhere from 15 minutes to 90 minutes depending on which professors get hung up on it. i already know the e&m professor is going to take at least 15 minutes. not sure if the other two will just say “ok thanks for letting me know” and let me work on my mechanics homework or not. suzanne said the assignment would take all day if i started tomorrow.

i mean, i ain’t really doin anything else i guess. if i finish the assignment i’m just going to keep trying to catch up with the mechanics reading. we’re on chapter 3 of the textbook already. it took me like 4 hours to finish chapter 1.

mom was looking at my medications i had left on my dresser today and i can’t remember if i took my leftover surgery painkillers to the police station or not. if i didn’t... well, mom’s not above “convincing” me i didn’t need stuff that she wanted. i did actually need my pain meds after i had my wisdom teeth out a few years ago but i didn’t have them because mom decided she needed them more! i’ve probably complained about that before though.

guess i don’t have any control over that situation any more. i mean, the “did i take the meds to the police station” situation. but that applies to basically every other situation too.

it’s 10:15 and i’m hoping to be in bed around 10:30 so i should start wrapping up. snoopy’s getting more tolerant of the goopy stuff i gotta give her twice a day. i mean, she won’t take it herself, but she’s willing to take some cookies from me afterward instead of making me leave them on the ottoman for her.

she’s starting to respond to her name and some other words i use. she doesn’t come running when i call her the way ping did, but she does materialize behind me every time i say “cookies.” and when i say “hi snoopy” when i get home she’ll poke her head out from my bed area and meow at me and run over to where i put my keys. and she does look over when i say her name at least. she’s a chill cat. i like her a lot.

i’m exhausted... i wish more grad students would work in the office on weekends. i feel bad pestering suzanne every five minutes when i’m actually working on homework problems. at least i’m extremely confident that my answers this time are actually correct. i’m not ENTIRELY sure what the last problem was asking for writing-wise, but the math is as good as we could get it. it should have taken about 2 minutes but i was so wiped out and hazy by the end of the day that it took over 40 because we were all making it way more complicated than it needed to be.

maybe everyone else was tired too. i shouldn’t keep assuming everyone knows more than i do. i mean... they kinda do. they are in grad classes and i got kicked back to undergrad. but when i explain problems it seems to help people figure out what they need to do. it was kind of like that in undergrad too. people seemed helped by the questions i asked even if it was just because i wasn’t sure what was going on.

it’s not that i hold people to really high standards as much as it is that i assume they are already there and i have fallen behind. i can’t read other people’s minds so i assume they know what they are talking about. but that’s still assuming! so i guess i just suck at not jumping to faulty conclusions.

that’s where i’m at. i’m going to get ready for bed now and maybe i can nab 8 and a half hours of sleep before i gotta teach in the morning. that might help me feel a little better.

i want to make a tofu dish that will be more filling than salad. but it doesn’t seem like the grocery store near my apartment sells any non-premade-freezer-meal soy products. suzanne and taylor suggested trader joe’s but i’m not sure how the cost would work out yet.

night.

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opepin · 7 years

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july: week three

17: i was really awake at 7:15 am when my alarm woke me up, but i went back to sleep for like 5 more minutes to see what i would do in the dream i was having. LOL. well, i got up, did my hiit workout, and i had the hardest time lowering my heart rate so i could stop sweating and take a shower. .___.; after like 10 minutes, i was finally able to do it...kinda, but i had to take a shower anyway and eat breakfast and then get to work on time...ish haha. my heart rate has dropped back down to 53 bpm :) yay, it makes me happy that it’s normalizing again. my face was pretty red and i was still sweaty when i got to the train... it’s okay! i just gotta keep going and wake up earlier to give my body time to cool down. the moment i walked in, cait was like woahhh, where have you been and etc. aw, it was nice welcome back chat with her, raj, joe, and charles. some of the devs weren’t there because they had to go to their client site and everyone apparently, just rolls in later on in the day now :O lol so my not being there is not a big deal :P

i started my work day by filling out an enrollment form for benefits! i’m getting my own dental insurance -- i feel so adult. lol. then i started working on templates mixed in with some internet errands. it’ll be a short week for me because i’m taking the day off to celebrate kevin’s birthday with him on thursday :3 hmm being at the office again is so far, refreshing. i got a good amount of work done and got to catch up with phil after lunch. charles made lunch plans so i went to south station to get food from the taco party food truck but they weren’t there... so i had to do some social media hunting and i found them down the street next to gogi on the block. i got their deep fried tofu and chorizo seitan taco with a side of tortilla chips and pinto dip. mmm. i ate all of that at my desk and i was so fullll. then i ate some of the cherries i brought from home. i ate so much that i was pretty uncomfortable in the tummy for the rest of the day lol.

i continued working until 4 pm and i got real worked up about tax withholdings and allowances because something changed in my paycheck and i was trying to figure out if i needed to fix it... sigh. then i noticed that haowei and charles dipped real quick after coming back from a bathroom break... raj said he hurt physically somewhere and cait, michelle, and i were all worried and watching him lol. then i left to catch the train where this lady (she was injured / had a limp) decided to take the stairs while the braintree train was approaching. the guy behind her turned around and ran down the other side of the stairs and i just stayed behind hoping that i would make it. then she stopped midway... and when she finally got to the bottom, my train JUST left. omg, i was in such a rage. it felt like she did it on purpose because she looked back at me right after the train left and then said nothing and stopped again. i just walked around her. the next train was 15 minutes away and it was flipping packed. i had to be standing behind the most inconsiderate human being. this guy decided that he owned the entire aisle and just let his body hang out 3/4 of the aisle while holding on to the top of the holds. his hand was inches away from my butt and i was putting all my body weight on my still healing foot. i was so ticked off that i kind of pushed him whenever i could and etc but he kept taking up space -_____-” #commuterrage

he left and i got a seat on the train for the rest of the ride. i picked up packages and had to get a trolley because one of my packages was just so freaking heavy. i only realized what it was when i opened it in the apartment... me and my mom got kevin a boos cutting board and i decided to splurge and get him the largest one... i didn’t expect it to be so damn heavy. well, i read 6.5 lbs but it was SO heavy. i decided to hide it along with the boxes (just in case we need to return for a more practically sized one) under half of the bed lol. then i went to play with the new smartphone lenses i got in the mail as well. the wide angle one works like a dream and the macro one is okay... i don’t think i’ll be using that one much anyway. when kevin came back, i debated on whether to keep or return them... i made a snapchat video and asked people and they all said to keep it. i had sort of an anger episode after telling kevin about my day and what i should do about my paycheck stuff and ugh, i just couldn’t not yell and kinda shake things around. i ran around the apartment yelling ‘why ______?! why ____?!?!’

then i exercised while kevin cooked steak for dinner. the video i did was more cardio than strength so i did a lot of cardio today and i was wiped out. i took a shower and then kevin and i ate his deliciously cooked steak topped with the most delicious onion glaze ever. we watched izombie, i cut up all the dying strawberries, we ate them, and then kevin went on a small run. he’s starting to do cardio now and he told me to keep him honest... WILL DO >:D haha. i did my pt stretches and iced my feet while reading a chapter of the journey mapping book. then i brushed and got into bed just right before 12 am. i stayed up relieving an itch to edit a picture i took today with the wide angle lens, updated to instagram, and then went to sleep at 12:30 pm. zzzz. i was working from home tomorrow so i would get enough sleep to wake up at 8 am. :)

18: i woke up at 8 am, did some hip hop cardio, showered, ate breakfast, and woke up kevin. then i started work, got fired up over an article about a girl’s post on linkedin that talked about job rejection (very generic) and how she is now getting job offers and that the linkedin post is now viral -__-”, and then got even more bummed out when i was talking to cole and he revealed that all the teams at t7 will be separated when we move office locations :/ and also that the dev team went to check out the space yesterday and left me in the dark... well, i’m not in the dev team so i guess i have no right to feel sad or left out, right? it’s gonna be an interesting move :/ sigh. i ate lunch while we had our all-hands and then went to pick up kevin’s present from the package concierge :) the packaging for the thing i got him is so on point. i’m so excited to surprise him thursday morning (:

i hopped on a call with phil and dave before stand up and we figured out some things. i pointed out some design details that could be addressed -- i’ve been feeling akjnskdf about my tasks right now because everything feels so disorganized with the new features even though it’s supposed to be easier to use the product :/ well, we figured stuff out, got on stand up, and then i worked on the templates for a bit and stopped because we have a trial with a potential customer tomorrow and we didn’t want to import any unfinished sample journey maps in there if i was working on any. i got pretty tired from everything that happened in the morning so i doodled a bit to make myself feel at least a bit better before taking a nap and then doing my ab workout. after i finished, i took some pictures for pas with the wide angle lens i got and also talked to vivian for a bit on chat. kevin came back early from climbing, showered, and then we cooked right away because both of us were pretty hungry.

i rested my foot while editing my instagram and stuff. my foot started to hurt a bit but nothing is swollen. i may have done too many jumps today and yesterday... we ate dinner while finishing the latest season of izombie?! i didn’t know we went through it all that quick ): now we have to find something new to watch and / or just wait for our shows to come out again. the rest of the night, i did my pt stretches while watching half of an episode of beat shazam and then read a chapter in the journey mapping book while icing my feet. then i got ready for bed and had the hardest time falling asleep... :( i knew i wasn’t gonna get a good night’s rest by the time i did ko...

19: i had a slight headache when i woke up and my foot kind of hurt so i did low impact cardio in the morning. then i showered and ate breakfast. my stomach was cramping a lot so i decided to work from home in the morning and then head over to the office after my physical therapy appointment. i fell asleep trying to wake up kevin LOL but then i woke up and got started on work. i put on the latest world of dance episode and then continued creating templates. my stomach felt slightly uncomfortable the rest of the morning... i ate some plain buns before heading out to physical therapy. i had a bit of a longer session today because it was my last. there was some swelling in my foot again but that’s because i did 2 hiit workouts in one day on accident... i got a good farewell and then walked over to the office. i ate lunch before hopping on stand up and getting on a call. after that, i wrapped up what i did today and then headed out to pick up kevin from work at around 4:30 pm. i looped around to grab kevin a slice of cake from flour bakery and got lost doing that... so i was really sweaty by the time i got to kevin. it was soooo humid and hot today.

we walked to south station because the silver line was working above ground today and it was too hot for that. we got to south station and it was PACKED. we waited for 2 trains and then rq’d and made a reservation at a restaurant on opentable and walked over there LOL. we actually made a reservation for miel, a restaurant i booked for tomorrow’s dinner... so i had to tell kevin and he just laughed and called himself clever... haha. we were the first ones to get dinner and we also looked really out of place with our attire HAHA. we were also super sweaty. kevin got scallops and risotto and i got ratatouille pasta with red wine sangria. the sangria was good~ the pasta was subpar, but kevin’s food was deliciousssss. lol we felt too out of place to ask for the pasta to go in a box so the waiter took it and we never saw the rest again. oh well~ :/ by the time we finished eating, south station was pretty empty. we got home and just chilled out. i didn’t exercise in the evening because i walked like 40+ minutes in the humidity and i sweated a lot. so i just showered and watched beat shazam before hopping into bed at around 12 am. i stayed up to wish kevin a happy birthday of course :)

20: i got out of bed at 10:30 am or so and then set up all of kevin’s gifts on the island, wrote him a card, and made the gifts look presentable LOL. kevin already knew that he was getting a cutting board, but not the skillet and the accessories :) i woke him up at around 11:20 am and then brought him to the island and he was actually so surprised. i thought he knew i was going to get him a cast iron skillet because i’ve been telling him that we should cook steak and etc. haha. he got caught up in reading about seasoning it but then we got ready to leave for brunch at brownstone! the ‘t’ trains got there whenever we got on the platform so we had perfect timing today. we ordered drinks and got delicious egg benedicts and hash. i got the duck and sweet potato hash and kevin got the pulled pork benny. everything was delicious~ they even put a candle in his english muffin LOL <3 we got midday tipsy from drinking and walked around copley mall for a bit before going home.

we chilled on the sofa for a while when we got home. kevin read fanfic while i talked to people on facebook messenger. then we drove to roche bros to get ingredients for steak dinner (: we got back and kevin started seasoning the skillet while i did my workout for the day. he looked so happy with that large af cutting board and skillet. :P i showered and then watched kevin cook. hehe, he looked so happy. kevin had to clean the skillet a bit after cooking so our food kind of got cold but still delicious! kevin made us roasted potatoes, asparagus, and a medium steak with mushroom and onions on top. mmm. we ate while watching ‘quanitco.’ lol i got hooked right at the very first episode and we watched maybe 4-5 episodes after because there is always a twist!!! i got ready for bed before 12 am and then spent the final minutes just cuddling with kevin :3 then i went to sleep. kevin handed me my feet xray bill though and i had to look at it before i went to sleep and it got me so tilted because they charged me more than the received estimate. .__. i spent some time looking up the massachusetts pricing transparency law for health care and just gave up and went to sleep at 1 am. i did not sleep well though.

21: the health care system in america sucks. i woke up in a pretty bad mood because i looked at my x-ray bill yesterday night and i woke up with the same disgruntled thoughts -_- after brushing my teeth, i called them and they said they had no record of the estimate i was given, but they did call to check and gave me 10% off my bill. so i guess it turned out alright because i ended up paying around what i was quoted for, but still, wtf, health care? after that call, i ate breakfast, and started my work day. i felt like i needed to exercise but i needed to get some actual work done today because i feel like i’m lagging behind in some ways. i did a good amount of work and then i fit in a 30 minute oblique workout before showering, washing the dishes, and making sure all is well in the apartment before heading out to meet kevin at the envoy. this meant me stressing out about meeting him later than usual. i did calm down on the train ride there and told kevin how i felt. the overnight bag was hella heavy though so i had to stop on the bridge and rest before meeting up with kevin. my back was soaked when i got there.

we checked in and went to our room first. the room was so nice :) i loved the sliding doors with the antique map designs on them. i really liked the tv and its placement right in front of the bed. kevin and i watched quantico before getting ready to head out to miel for his birthday dinner. it was a nice walk there but our dinner there wasn’t...well, the service was pretty bad and it might be because we used a voucher? but i’m not sure. we got seated outside right away but it took forever for our server (he reminded me of my grandpa) to get our order and get our food out. he forgot to make our sangria and apologized but we were almost at our entrees by the time he remembered. he kept disappearing and attended to other tables before us for some reason too. well, the food was pretty good. we got beef tartare, atlantic sole and gnocchi, steak and frites, and sorbet for dessert. mmm. we had to take our entrees back to the hotel only to find out that there wasn’t a mini fridge. well, our dinner was 2 hours long and we spent more than half of that waiting for our food. :/ so meh. we were really full when we got back so we rested and then got a bucket of ice for our food (didn’t use it though) and then we explored the hotel. they have a fancy af fitness center that we ended up not using.

we walked along the wharf and it was so nice :) then we spent the rest of the night watching quantico. the shower was nice too with the waterfall design and the space. the envoy also has fresh brand shampoo and lotion (ofc i took that stuff when we checked out). we got a vegan almond butter coconut ice cream sandwich before room service closed down for the night and it was DELICIOUS. we stayed up until 4 am and then went to sleep in the comfy hotel bed. what a day. what an experience with kevin (: <3 i hope he’s enjoying his birthday weekend so far. hehe i love spending time with him and staying in nice hotels lulz.

22: we did wake up at 10:15 am and then i ordered room service for us for breakfast. it was so exciting! :) i got steel cut oatmeal and kevin said it did taste better than regular oatmeal hehe. i also got $6 chamomile tea... why is tea so expensive at hotels? we watched an episode of quantico as we ate breakfast and packed. lol i think we’re very lbejafhsjdf about the characters right now. we finished packing and checked out right at 12 pm. then we stopped by starbucks so i could get a drink and get gold status again LOL. we finished the pink drink by the time we got to south station. when we got back to the apartment, i unpacked all of our stuff, chilled on the sofa for a while, and i tried on my warby parker glasses. i hated them LOL. the lenses caused a lot of chromatic abberation and made my eyes terribly small so i was not into them. the frames also felt/looked smaller than they were in the store?? kevin said they looked fine and he still liked them but i was not into them. so i asked him if we could drive over to south end to spectacles and check out their frames and etc.

even though he was tired, kevin agreed and then we left :) so grateful for this bear <3 we found a really good parking spot and then met paul, the owner of the store. he adjusted my glasses for me and checked the prescription and he suggested frames and etc. the moment i walked in there, i knew that i was gonna buy glasses from him and return my warby parker ones. kevin and i had a fun time trying on glasses. kevin was also bummed because we went down to the leasing office to make an appointment to see the apartment with the den earlier that day and she told us that they had someone else sign a lease for that apartment already... wtf? we’ve been talking to her about it for weeks and they mentioned nothing about this until now. i was ajkfnsjkf about it but not as much as kevin. i got these cute round “treasure” glasses and 1.74 high index lenses for $250. it would have cost about the same if i upped the lenses to 1.74 at warby parker as well.

we drove right to kam man because we were hungry and made a makeshift meal plan for the week because we’re leaving on friday. we split a beijing crepe and bought some buns. unff chinese sponge / chiffon cakes are the best. we were in and out real quick. we put everything away when we got home and then kevin played some hollow knight while i watched. then kevin went to cook and i did 30 minutes of cardio. we ate dinner while watching quantico and then kevin went to run in the fitness center and i just did dance cardio in the apartment. this new video is pretty great, but lots of jumping x( i stopped by the center to give company to kevin and then got distracted by talking to daniel about bartering LOL. kevin showered first while i did the dishes haha and then i showered and i think we stayed up watching quantico? maybe we didn’t...but it says on my fitbit that i went to sleep at 2:30 am... he might have gamed while i watched some thing on the ipad. zzz. well, we stayed up because we had nothing planned for tomorrow :)

23: it was our lazy day today. kevin got up at 10 am to talk to priya on the phone and i lazed in the bed until around 10:30 am. i ate a banana with peanut butter and some oatmeal for breakfast while i looked at this week’s coupons and planned my outfits for our upcoming trip on friday! i watched some youtube videos and then crawled back into bed after a bit. after his call, kevin made soup dumplings and i ate some along with leftovers. i did some packing while kevin gamed a bit and then we went to bj’s to use our coupons. we stocked up on a ton of meat and i got more contact solution and lotion~ we also got a 6-pack of lunchables...LOL. right when we got back, we split a pizza and nacho one. mmm they still taste the same. then kevin went to game while i did a bit of cleaning. then we watched a few more episodes of quantico and then kevin cooked japanese curry for dinner. i did 30 minutes of cardio while kevin cooked and then stopped to fold laundry. then we ate dinner and watched more quantico. i also talked to my mom for a bit and she told me to have safe travels~ we also ended up eating 5/6 lunchables by the end of the day and then i did 30 minutes of back and then 20 more minutes of hip hop cardio because i was feeling bad about eating them lunchables LOL. i showered and then got ready for bed and snoozed at around 12 am. wow, we did a lot today :O

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