#week picker

[mercuriobebop]

Day 1 of Sapphic Disco Week - Favourite character: Lilienne the net picker. I find her very beautiful and charismatic, she stayed in my thoughts a lot after my first run

[kaijukebox]

Sapphic Disco Week: Day 1 - Favorite Female Character

Lilienne Carter save me, save me Lilienne Carter, save m

[doddsmountain]

Late for the first of the Sapphic Disco week D:

Anyway… 1. Favourite female character, Lilienne Carter!

[mochimouiemarty]

check the spread

—

ive had this idea since last year (december)

featuring!!!! Alejandro by @sanudefinitelyhasadhd !!!!

first time drawing vro, sorry if I got anything wrong rghshfhsbf

dont mind the messy background and the uncoordinated colors, my brain is mush, and everytime I try to draw I am mentally cupping the remains like a thirsty traveller on a dirt road who has finally found a small murky pond

[notvil]

my potential wips are: yandere, freak, scary guy deku; caregiver, objectification adj guy deku; rodeo cowboy guy deku; ovipovi, fae guy deku.

[the-uncanny-dag]

Sapphic Disco Week Day 1 - Favorite Female Character

Lilienne Carter. I'm so fucking normal about her @vickriarts

Original image by J.C. Leyendecker

[sunrise-parabeiium]

lilienne my BELOVED

ignore the bad anatomy i was trying to rushh.. shhhh

[siliconesausage]

Sapphic Disco Week - Day 2

I did do day 1 but didn't post it because I'm shy. Here you go! Thanks to Vicki for organizing this :-)

[microwavepopcorn]

[ghostalmost]

i know i should probably still be touching my two week old tattoo as little as possible, but the lines are slightly raised and they feel SO COOOOOOL

[loststarphounix]

less than 3 weeks to go!

the devas are already getting prepared. which one dressed up best?

[eunuchve]

tags: mdni, smut, dragon!morax, MONSTERFUCKING, rut/mating cycles, predator/prey, double dragon cocks, double penetration, CERVIX FUCKING, size kink, mentioning pregnancy, mating, bro has a worship kink, breeding kink hints (he's in a rut dont hold it against him) a.n: (what have i done) this is the first porn with plot I've written and I gotta say; it is damn long.... happy valentines my dears, enjoy! pairings: zhongli x afab!reader

Lord Morax is a god; but he is more than that, he is an adeptus. illuminated beast. this fact needs no introduction, everyone knows. 

so when he took leave to a remote part of liyue somewhere, unknown to even his retainers, no one dared to bat an eye. the rain has fallen heavy, the season has become damp, and the scheduled time is near; Rex Lapis will have his rut.

it didn't take long for people to figure out the reasons for his absence; not when the lord became increasingly unfocused during stately meetings a week prior or when his eyes would turn to slits with a whiff of a woman's perfume for a month’s time.

You, the lone herb picker of a local pharmacy, didn't know any better when you stumbled upon a large hollowed-out cave that wasn't supposed to be there. you are familiar with the terrains, hell, you know it like the back of your hand -- so imagine your surprise when you find a nesting dragon inside, heaving, grunting alone; its horns glowing with a bright amber before its head snapped to your directly, eyes instantly turning to slits.

at first, you stumble backwards, watching as the figure slowly but surely towers over your frame; your neck cranes to meet its molten bronze eyes. it didn't take you long to realise whose privacy you had so ungraciously barged into; your mouth dries and you dropped your basket full of violetgrass, your heart beating out of your chest before your feet finally got some sense and took running to the woods. 

'fuck fuck fuck.'

you are going to die- you are so sure you are going to die. when your feet stumble and trip over branches and air, when you can hear him gliding through the sky; undoubtedly searching for you. The sounds of his scaled body burst through the leaves of the ginkgo trees, or of his deep, rough growls that echo through the forest. With every heavy step you take, you can feel him getting closer and closer. The thrill and fear mix inside of you, your body stirs with blood coursing through you. Weirdly amid the fear you feel-- somehow excitement came into the mix; something about your life being in the mercy of a chase?

Why is he there again? Rut? So will he fuck you or will he kill you? You certainly prefer one to the other. 

Your legs continue to run, even as you trip and fall, or when you stumble upon a rock or two; searching for an exit to a nearby village or open path; but no matter how far you run you can't seem to find the correct way. Your eyes scanned all directions before your body was suddenly pinned down under a sudden force and unmoving weight.

The paws of a creature so large that it covers your entire back, its talons digging into your back. The smell of freshly dug earth and exotic spices violates your nostrils and your heart can't help but thump against your chest just a little faster. You turned your neck, finding the dragon’s face mere inches from yours; his hot breath grazing the exposed skin of your neck. 

“Please don’t kill me.” god your voice sounds so desperate; with a hint of a broken whimper- even you are embarrassed by that fact. but your god didn't seem disturbed, instead he let out a low grunt, before hissing back a reply.

"don't beg."

"...huh?"

"don't." he spat the word, seeming holding something back. "beg."

"b-but--"

he didn't let you finish, picking you up by the scruff of your neck before throwing you to his back. he flew you back somewhere, you didn't care to notice since most of the flight back you are scrambling for something to hold on to; whether it is the golden spines or his actual body.

by the time you both arrive at the entrance of the familiar cave, he has waited for you to get off his back. you inclined, of course, shakily getting a feel of the ground below, catching your breath whilst adrenaline courses through you. once you get a feel yourself, your eyes travel to him, catching his large form walking slowly to the back of the cave.

"you won't kill me?" you find yourself asking; his head then slowly turns to you before, a visible look of confusion etched on it.

"Why would I?" his deep rough voice replies. he is definitely holding something back, the way his lips parted a bit to let steam out of his mouth, the sharp teeth that are visible from them make you gulp the pooling saliva in your mouth.

"Because... cave..."

weak reasoning, you'd have to admit, but if he won't kill you then you'd have to be sure of the other possibility. "then would you fuck me?"

the look on his face deepened before his head hung low, and a soft whisper came to you for a reply. "what makes you think of that?"

"It's your- Rex Lapis it's your time of..."

embarrassed, incredibly embarrassed; that's the feeling you felt, with the heat of blood rushing to your cheek and thumping heart against your chest only enforcing the fact.

"it is time for my rut, yes," he confirmed, his gaze thrown to the floor, avoiding your figure, "but I am not one with lost senses; sleep, it is night, it will be safer to leave in the morning."

you nod weakly, shuffling your way to the walls and plopping down on the dirt before curling up. the heat in your cheeks refuses to prevail as you watch him walk back, his long tail moves with each step he takes, the tuff at the end resembling that of golden clouds.

"My lord why are you moving so far away?" you asked, instantly biting your lip the moment that question escaped your mind, realising how desperate you sounded with that pretence.

"your arousal," he states matter of factly. "you. I can smell it."

you look at him wide-eyed, your face now comparable in its heat to the sun, your lips agape.

"it's safer for you this way," he continues.

"do you not want to?" archons you are greedy aren't you. "your rut- I can.. help..."

"I doubt it." his voice is precise, he says it like it's a fact, not even letting you have a space to express your desire. "they are the size of your thigh and their length..."

"I can try." bold- now you are being too bold. the size of your thigh he said? now you can feel your ears getting heated up from the shame. your thigh now pressed together as you imagine him inside of you; a second pass and your arms no longer placed nicely on your lap, instead instinctively protecting your chest.

his gaze looms over you, his snout now only a hairsbreadth away from your neck; a long deep breath he takes is audible before he groans out a reply.

"Do not test me human," something inside of him is threatening undone, you know it, "I will breed you till your womb is full and your consciousness lost-- if that is not what you desire then stay quiet and sleep; I shall bring you the village in the morning but until then speak not of this."

you gulp, now your lips parted before you crane your neck and place a shaky kiss on his scaled cheek, the heat of his body contrasting the cold of your flesh. "... that is what I desire--"

with that your clothes are torn apart; the valuable silk you spend months of your wage on is gone and your naked skin is exposed. the cold air hardened your nipples and he took notice, his head travelling down, his long forked tongue lapping sweetly onto them, earning your strangle out a moan.

"getting aroused from a chase," he breathes out, almost teasing you; hot breath contrasts that of the cooling saliva on your perked buds, sending vibrations down your spine. "thinking you can take a dragon's cocks, wanting to be the mother of my offsprings -- what bold actions you possessed."

you let out a whine, his tongue now travelling down, ever so subtly closing down to your cunt. you pressed your thighs together; embarrassed, already feeling your arousal seeping out of you before his claws forced them wide open, earning your moan.

"you are pooling my dear," he almost chuckled, his eyes narrowed as he licked his lips, his breath now grazing your quivering folds, unexpected whimper broken out of you.

"please?"

with that word you can feel the air snap hotter, his eyes now meeting yours; his form towering over you before he chuckle, training down kisses, his tongue now making sure you are covered in his scent.

"didn't I tell you not to beg?" his claws hold your thigh open and he took a lap of your cunt, almost smiling at your taste. "do you know why my dear?"

"n-no--"

your moans escape, feeling his tongue entering you, fucking you, stimulating your walls, not letting you escape. you arched your back, biting your lips as another whimper persisted. you feel his hand moving, now pressing his claws to your other hole, expecting you to open up; and you let him, your holes now stuffed full of him before you feel his tongue slip out of you, your whine tells him as much about what you want.

"Because if you beg..." he now moves his hands to your ankles, folding you in half and you watch helplessly, his two golden cocks decorated with geometric lines and veins on either side, one on top of the other- he does not lie, the size of those things are comparable to your thigh, its length will most likely penetrate your womb- "I will answer."

he chuckles subtly, aligning his cocks to both of your holes, its weight now pressing down on you, precum leaks out of them, lubricating you further.

"i am a god, my dear; I always answer."

with that he presses his cock head to your holes, hoping both of them will ease up. you moan his title out, causing him to snap his head to you, making him greedy.

Your little groan and hiss only help you muster up the strength to let loose, feeling your holes easing up before they let his cockheads in, making your chest heave.

he grunts against your neck; and you feel his teeth subtly tracing your shoulder, little nips that satiate his hunger, burying his head in its crook.

"Celestia." the way you feel around the tip of his cock is incomparable; the dragon finds himself clenching down his jaw, controlling his urges to slam you down to its hilt. "you are made for me my dear."

he grabs a hold of your hips, and you feel him sliding you down. you let out a low moan, your back still arched as you feel him inside of you more and more. the burn from the stretch doesn't scare you, even if you feel like you are being split in two- you only know the pleasure that waits for you not so out of reach.

not even halfway and you already feel him brushing against your cervix, your broken moan coupled with the way you rolled your hips almost makes him snap. his other cock too now deep inside of you- almost too deep; you feel the pressure against your throat, feeling his cocks twitch, almost making you jolt, your hand searching from his arm, nails now digging into his scales.

he looks at you, his parted lips letting out steam before his uneven breathing stops to let him speak. "I shall move now."

you look at him, biting your lips and nod firmly, affirming your readiness. you feel him trying to go out of you, your cunt and hole tightening around him, almost hungry before he slams into you, earning your cry of pleasure.

it persists; he goes out of you before he slips inside, messaging your walls before they tightened around him again, hungrily seeking him, your face now fucked out with pleasure, feeling him abuse your holes.

"I'm not even all the way in my dear." he almost smirks, you can see it. before you know it, you suddenly feel him picking you up, your walls being freed from his cocks, suddenly empty and you whine; letting him flip you to your stomach and holding your ass up in the air.

he marvels at the sight, seeing both of your holes gape yet clench down on nothing, it almost made him giddy.

"my beautiful follower," he mused, his claws now digging into your flesh before you feel his cocks lining up with your holes again; embarrassingly you can feel your cunt relaxing, ready to take him in once more. "will you be my mate now darling?"

"yes!" your desperation stays, you want him inside you so bad, "please Rex Lapis please!"

you didn't know what did, but you certainly awaken something in him. he brings you up in the air before slamming you down on his cocks, your walls now taking him fully, your stomach bulging out with his shape. your breath knocks out of you; you can feel him all the way in your womb, your hand can't help but trace the raised flesh, your spine almost shivering from the sensation.

"keep begging."

that sounds like an order; even your now fucked out brain knows that. so like the good follower you are you follow that order.

"Please make me your mate," you choke out, his slow rhythms that know your breath slowly but surely going faster, brushing up against all your pleasure spots, making you roll your eyes to the back of your head. "please please please please I wanna- I want--"

he chuckles, the way you mewl your pleas, the way your warm flesh tightens around him; he can even feel your walls hungrily sucking him in so nicely. in his mind he is thanking Celestia; because fuck, you are a masterpiece.

"a human could die from this," he grunts out, going in and out of you with an inhuman pace, your cunt and hole loosening with his movements. "not you my dear; you are made for me."

you whine from his statement, the bludge he created only drives you to the edge, feeling something inside of you tightening, your nails digging into his scaled flesh, your face supported by his nose. "R-rex Lapis i- my-- i'm--"

"you want to cum my dear?" he almost teases you with the question, his cock brushing, bullying your g spot, making you dig your nails further, your head could only nod desperately at his question. "hold it, you could only cum when I do."

you whine out with his order, and he lets out a subtle groaning with it, chuckling at your reaction. his hand moves down, large talons brushing against your hard clit, teasing the nub; knowing exactly what it will make you do.

you wrapped your arm around his neck, his golden mane brushing against your flesh so softly; and your tug your face on them, muffling out your long moan and desperate cries.

"fuck- please lord mo- morax- r-rex lapis please- i want- i wanna- please please please-"

he kept his word, his face moving and kissing your neck, feeling you move your pelvis to fit him better, your inside hungrily brushing against his shaft. his brow knits, he feels himself almost coming undone.

"now."

with a final thrust, he fills both of your holes with white ropes of cum, you yourself arching your back, feeling your orgasm hits you harder than ever before. he hear your pants before he coils around you, closing gaps between the two of your while still being inside of you, wrapped up by your own warmth.

"i shall make the wedding preparation after the season's over," he breath out; your mind finally able to join the sentence together before you move your head, repeating the most important word again.

"wedding..."

"of course my dear," he kisses you, his snout pressed against your jaw before he tugs his head onto your collar bone. his hand travels to your stomach, rubbing the visible buldge that only grows with his cum, almost making look pregnant.

"the little ones will be coming soon."

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Even if you think AI search could be good, it won’t be good

TONIGHT (May 15), I'm in NORTH HOLLYWOOD for a screening of STEPHANIE KELTON'S FINDING THE MONEY; FRIDAY (May 17), I'm at the INTERNET ARCHIVE in SAN FRANCISCO to keynote the 10th anniversary of the AUTHORS ALLIANCE.

The big news in search this week is that Google is continuing its transition to "AI search" – instead of typing in search terms and getting links to websites, you'll ask Google a question and an AI will compose an answer based on things it finds on the web:

https://blog.google/products/search/generative-ai-google-search-may-2024/

Google bills this as "let Google do the googling for you." Rather than searching the web yourself, you'll delegate this task to Google. Hidden in this pitch is a tacit admission that Google is no longer a convenient or reliable way to retrieve information, drowning as it is in AI-generated spam, poorly labeled ads, and SEO garbage:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/05/03/keyword-swarming/#site-reputation-abuse

Googling used to be easy: type in a query, get back a screen of highly relevant results. Today, clicking the top links will take you to sites that paid for placement at the top of the screen (rather than the sites that best match your query). Clicking further down will get you scams, AI slop, or bulk-produced SEO nonsense.

AI-powered search promises to fix this, not by making Google search results better, but by having a bot sort through the search results and discard the nonsense that Google will continue to serve up, and summarize the high quality results.

Now, there are plenty of obvious objections to this plan. For starters, why wouldn't Google just make its search results better? Rather than building a LLM for the sole purpose of sorting through the garbage Google is either paid or tricked into serving up, why not just stop serving up garbage? We know that's possible, because other search engines serve really good results by paying for access to Google's back-end and then filtering the results:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/04/teach-me-how-to-shruggie/#kagi

Another obvious objection: why would anyone write the web if the only purpose for doing so is to feed a bot that will summarize what you've written without sending anyone to your webpage? Whether you're a commercial publisher hoping to make money from advertising or subscriptions, or – like me – an open access publisher hoping to change people's minds, why would you invite Google to summarize your work without ever showing it to internet users? Nevermind how unfair that is, think about how implausible it is: if this is the way Google will work in the future, why wouldn't every publisher just block Google's crawler?

A third obvious objection: AI is bad. Not morally bad (though maybe morally bad, too!), but technically bad. It "hallucinates" nonsense answers, including dangerous nonsense. It's a supremely confident liar that can get you killed:

https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2023/sep/01/mushroom-pickers-urged-to-avoid-foraging-books-on-amazon-that-appear-to-be-written-by-ai

The promises of AI are grossly oversold, including the promises Google makes, like its claim that its AI had discovered millions of useful new materials. In reality, the number of useful new materials Deepmind had discovered was zero:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/23/maximal-plausibility/#reverse-centaurs

This is true of all of AI's most impressive demos. Often, "AI" turns out to be low-waged human workers in a distant call-center pretending to be robots:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/31/neural-interface-beta-tester/#tailfins

Sometimes, the AI robot dancing on stage turns out to literally be just a person in a robot suit pretending to be a robot:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/29/pay-no-attention/#to-the-little-man-behind-the-curtain

The AI video demos that represent "an existential threat to Hollywood filmmaking" turn out to be so cumbersome as to be practically useless (and vastly inferior to existing production techniques):

https://www.wheresyoured.at/expectations-versus-reality/

But let's take Google at its word. Let's stipulate that:

a) It can't fix search, only add a slop-filtering AI layer on top of it; and

b) The rest of the world will continue to let Google index its pages even if they derive no benefit from doing so; and

c) Google will shortly fix its AI, and all the lies about AI capabilities will be revealed to be premature truths that are finally realized.

AI search is still a bad idea. Because beyond all the obvious reasons that AI search is a terrible idea, there's a subtle – and incurable – defect in this plan: AI search – even excellent AI search – makes it far too easy for Google to cheat us, and Google can't stop cheating us.

Remember: enshittification isn't the result of worse people running tech companies today than in the years when tech services were good and useful. Rather, enshittification is rooted in the collapse of constraints that used to prevent those same people from making their services worse in service to increasing their profit margins:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/03/26/glitchbread/#electronic-shelf-tags

These companies always had the capacity to siphon value away from business customers (like publishers) and end-users (like searchers). That comes with the territory: digital businesses can alter their "business logic" from instant to instant, and for each user, allowing them to change payouts, prices and ranking. I call this "twiddling": turning the knobs on the system's back-end to make sure the house always wins:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/02/19/twiddler/

What changed wasn't the character of the leaders of these businesses, nor their capacity to cheat us. What changed was the consequences for cheating. When the tech companies merged to monopoly, they ceased to fear losing your business to a competitor.

Google's 90% search market share was attained by bribing everyone who operates a service or platform where you might encounter a search box to connect that box to Google. Spending tens of billions of dollars every year to make sure no one ever encounters a non-Google search is a cheaper way to retain your business than making sure Google is the very best search engine:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/02/21/im-feeling-unlucky/#not-up-to-the-task

Competition was once a threat to Google; for years, its mantra was "competition is a click away." Today, competition is all but nonexistent.

Then the surveillance business consolidated into a small number of firms. Two companies dominate the commercial surveillance industry: Google and Meta, and they collude to rig the market:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jedi_Blue

That consolidation inevitably leads to regulatory capture: shorn of competitive pressure, the companies that dominate the sector can converge on a single message to policymakers and use their monopoly profits to turn that message into policy:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/06/05/regulatory-capture/

This is why Google doesn't have to worry about privacy laws. They've successfully prevented the passage of a US federal consumer privacy law. The last time the US passed a federal consumer privacy law was in 1988. It's a law that bans video store clerks from telling the newspapers which VHS cassettes you rented:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Video_Privacy_Protection_Act

In Europe, Google's vast profits lets it fly an Irish flag of convenience, thus taking advantage of Ireland's tolerance for tax evasion and violations of European privacy law:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/05/15/finnegans-snooze/#dirty-old-town

Google doesn't fear competition, it doesn't fear regulation, and it also doesn't fear rival technologies. Google and its fellow Big Tech cartel members have expanded IP law to allow it to prevent third parties from reverse-engineer, hacking, or scraping its services. Google doesn't have to worry about ad-blocking, tracker blocking, or scrapers that filter out Google's lucrative, low-quality results:

https://locusmag.com/2020/09/cory-doctorow-ip/

Google doesn't fear competition, it doesn't fear regulation, it doesn't fear rival technology and it doesn't fear its workers. Google's workforce once enjoyed enormous sway over the company's direction, thanks to their scarcity and market power. But Google has outgrown its dependence on its workers, and lays them off in vast numbers, even as it increases its profits and pisses away tens of billions on stock buybacks:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/11/25/moral-injury/#enshittification

Google is fearless. It doesn't fear losing your business, or being punished by regulators, or being mired in guerrilla warfare with rival engineers. It certainly doesn't fear its workers.

Making search worse is good for Google. Reducing search quality increases the number of queries, and thus ads, that each user must make to find their answers:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/24/naming-names/#prabhakar-raghavan

If Google can make things worse for searchers without losing their business, it can make more money for itself. Without the discipline of markets, regulators, tech or workers, it has no impediment to transferring value from searchers and publishers to itself.

Which brings me back to AI search. When Google substitutes its own summaries for links to pages, it creates innumerable opportunities to charge publishers for preferential placement in those summaries.

This is true of any algorithmic feed: while such feeds are important – even vital – for making sense of huge amounts of information, they can also be used to play a high-speed shell-game that makes suckers out of the rest of us:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/05/11/for-you/#the-algorithm-tm

When you trust someone to summarize the truth for you, you become terribly vulnerable to their self-serving lies. In an ideal world, these intermediaries would be "fiduciaries," with a solemn (and legally binding) duty to put your interests ahead of their own:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/05/07/treacherous-computing/#rewilding-the-internet

But Google is clear that its first duty is to its shareholders: not to publishers, not to searchers, not to "partners" or employees.

AI search makes cheating so easy, and Google cheats so much. Indeed, the defects in AI give Google a readymade excuse for any apparent self-dealing: "we didn't tell you a lie because someone paid us to (for example, to recommend a product, or a hotel room, or a political point of view). Sure, they did pay us, but that was just an AI 'hallucination.'"

The existence of well-known AI hallucinations creates a zone of plausible deniability for even more enshittification of Google search. As Madeleine Clare Elish writes, AI serves as a "moral crumple zone":

https://estsjournal.org/index.php/ests/article/view/260

That's why, even if you're willing to believe that Google could make a great AI-based search, we can nevertheless be certain that they won't.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/05/15/they-trust-me-dumb-fucks/#ai-search

Image: Cryteria (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:HAL9000.svg

CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en

--

djhughman https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Modular_synthesizer_-_%22Control_Voltage%22_electronic_music_shop_in_Portland_OR_-_School_Photos_PCC_%282015-05-23_12.43.01_by_djhughman%29.jpg

CC BY 2.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/deed.en

[intheupside]

Survey Says: Guilty pleasure TV?

A lot of people aren't too proud of some of the TV shows they may watch, whether it's some bad reality show or a teen drama.

I wanted to know what Penguins players' guilty pleasure TV shows were for this Survey Says, and it turns out there's a lot of reality TV fans in the locker room (or now formerly of the locker room, in the case of some of the recently-traded). Here's what they all said.

Owen Pickering: I love "Gossip Girl." I'm so into it right now. I started two weeks ago and I'm two seasons in. It's so good.

Matt Grzelcyk: "Love Island," but the U.K. version. My girlfriend started watching it, and it's one of those where you don't want to admit, in the background, but then you start asking questions a little bit. Then I just watched the whole season. That's one I hate to admit.

P.O Joseph: "Gossip Girl" is great. "90210," "Californication," "Entourage," those are just some.

Marcus Pettersson: You know, I do watch "Love Island." My wife has probably watched "One Tree Hill" 100 times, I have watched that with her. So maybe "One Tree Hill" or "Love Island." We also watch "Paradise Hotel," a show in Sweden.

Sidney Crosby: I don't watch any reality TV at all, I barely watch shows. I don't have any guilty pleasure ones.

Drew O'Connor: I don't like the reality ones as much, I'll watch once in awhile. Probably "New Girl." If I need something to watch, I'll throw "New Girl" on for a couple episodes.

Sam Poulin: I'm watching "One Tree Hill" right now. I'm not obsessed with it yet, but it might become like that.

Vincent Desharnais: I really like the comfort shows like "The Office," "Friends," all those shows I can binge watch over and over again. I know all the seasons.

Ryan Graves: I used to like "The Bachelor," but I haven't watched that in years. I actually like "Big Brother", too. But the ones now are trash, like "Love Island" and those ones. No good. I liked "One Tree Hill."

Bryan Rust: "Friends." It's on Nick at Night still, for like three hours a night. It's played on repeat basically every night.

Phil Tomasino: I'm not into that stuff, reality TV, you know? Honestly, I don't have one. I'm a very serious TV show critic. I don't have a stupid one. I watched "Too Hot to Handle," the first season. Didn't watch it after, so I wouldn't even consider that a guilty pleasure.

Matt Nieto: I'm watching "Love Is Blind" right now, that's it right now.

Boko Imama: "South Park." Just a nice little background show that I like to have on.

Joel Blomqvist: One of those "Love Island" shows back home, or something. I've watched a season.

Jesse Puljujarvi: (Equipment manager Jon Taglianetti chimes in, 'He watches the Mormon wives show.') NO! I don't have any.  

Kris Letang: Does it have to be tacky? "Lucifer."

Tristan Jarry: Probably "Yellowstone," or any murder mystery show. I watch a lot of those on the plane.

Blake Lizotte: It's not really guilty pleasure, but I'd say "Friday Night Lights."

Alex Nedeljkovic: I used to watch "The Bachelor." Maybe "How I Met Your Mother." My wife's into that Vanderpump show. 

Jack St. Ivany: Oh, "Gossip Girl." We watched it in college, like all our roommates did. We acted like we hated it but I loved it. It was a great show.

Kevin Hayes: I don't watch it anymore, but my favorite show growing up was "One Tree Hill."

Noel Acciari: "Below Deck," all the charter ships and sailing.

Valtteri Puustinen: I watch so many Finnish TV shows, not much from the U.S. or Canada. One Finnish TV show, I've been watching all my life. It stared in 1999, and I've been watching it maybe 20-something years -- It's "Salatut elämät" (a Finnish soap opera that translates as "Secret Lives")

Anthony Beauvillier: "How I Met Your Mother," and "One Tree Hill."

Rickard Rakell: I watch "Paradise Hotel" right now. It's a Swedish reality show kind of like "Love Island."

Ryan Shea: I have seen "Love Island" a couple of times, it's so catchy. At first I watched it because I thought it was kind of crazy, the whole concept of it. But it's actually catchy.

Cody Glass: "Gossip Girl" is a big one. I've been grinding "How I Met Your Mother." And "Ted Lasso" is always a feel-good one.

Michael Bunting: I was actually huge into "Love Island" in Toronto, a lot of us would watch that. I'm kind of off of it now. But you know what? The last one I watched was "Love is Blind."

Erik Karlsson: I watch all of them. "Love Island," "The Challenge" is really good. I stopped watching "The Bachelor" and "Bachelorette," I'm over it.

tanger watching lucifer and erik watching ALL the reality tv shows is so on brand

[ilikeweedalot]

SOMETHING THERE R.S

There's something sweet and almost kind But he was mean and he was coarse and unrefined And now he's dear and so unsure I wonder why I didn't see it there before

It started small. Things a normal person would probably not notice, honestly you wouldn’t too if he hasn’t been your roommate for the past 5 months.

These past weeks you rarely wake up to inhumane cussing in the next room at 3 in the morning, there hasn’t been any noise complaints, the dishes were always clean, and no rogue boxers in your shared space. One would be relieved in this type of changes in their roommate’s behavior, if their roommate wasn’t Sukuna.

What the fuck is going on.

You were worried as hell. This type of thing doesn’t just happen on a random Tuesday. It’s either he’s up to something, or is extremely sick and counting his days.

So far, today has got to be the most astonishing yet. You came home to a paper bag of takeout on the table from your favorite restaurant.

Grabbing a pickle picker (the first thing you grabbed) you started to poke the bag, half expecting it to explode on your face. But it didn’t. There was no explosion, no rodent jumped out and attacked you and gave rabies. Nothing. It was just a normal bag of takeout.

Taking it as a sign to snoop on what’s inside. There were two boxes and bunch of side dishes.

After staring at it for what felt like an eternity, you come to a conclusion that it was probably for someone else. It checks out. He was practicing for having someone over. You head to your room to shower and take a well deserved rest. After the day you had today? It’s rightful that you get a 12 hour sleep.

Time flew by as you lay in bed. Cozy and wrapped like a burrito in your favorite fuzzy blanket that just spent ten minutes tumbling in the dryer when you heard the front door open, signaling you that he’s home. You paused the video you were watching to listen, probably for a second pair of footsteps, although you can’t really call the sound of his footsteps ‘footsteps’, more like stomps.

Can’t contain the giggle that slipped as you imagine him stomping of clouds carrying a huge bat chanting “FI FI FO FUM I SMELL THE BLOOD OF A MISERABLE YOUNG ADULT”. You were so lost in your thoughts that you didn’t hear him walk to your door, only realizing when you jumped as he knocked three times.

He paused, waiting for you to answer before he tells you what he wants to say. Likely to ask you to leave for the night so he can spend time with a special someone.

“Yeah?” You called out, not moving an inch from your cocoon

“You didn’t eat the food.”

Okay pause. Maybe you misheard?

“Huh?”

“The fucking food, on the table. Why’d you not eat?” A speckle of irritation ghosting his tone.

“I didn’t think it was for me…” Now sitting up, you look at the door.

“Who else would be for?”

Flabbergasted. That’s what you are. Absolutely in shock.

He bought you food. Your rude, mean, and bitchass of a roommate deliberately bought you food.

He must need something, right?

Hesitantly, you open your door. Sticking your head in the gap, you see Sukuna wearing a white tank in the kitchen taking plates from the cupboard then setting it out om the round table. You watched him take a pair of spoons and forks and placed then on the empty plates.

He must’ve felt your eyes on him. He lifted his head and for a moment, your eyes met.

You swear on your life his ears turned red for a millisecond . Why the fuck did they turn red?! Did he need something huge?

Seeming to notice the panic that was starting to form in your eyes, he took a deep breath and took a seat on a dining chair.

“Get your ass here and eat with me.”

It wasn’t a request or a question, it was an order.

Stepping out of your bedroom you walked to the table and took a seat in front of him, where he set your plate. The food was good, good enough that it masked the awkwardness from the silence matched with the clinking or silver on ceramic.

You finished first. You thought leaving now would be rude while he’s still eating. So you just sat there. Watching him. The intensity of panic rising again in your chest. The question of ‘what the fuck does he want from me’ building up; making it harder for you to breath.

“You look constipated” Breaking the silence, he eyed you up and down.

At the moment you didn’t know what happened, a perfect scenario of losing control over your own body.

“What the hell do you need from me?”

For a moment, Sukuna was taken a back by your sudden statement but regained his composure quite quickly. He sighed, placing the spoon and fork down.

“I don’t need anything.”

“Liar.” Mentally cursing your mouth for not having breaks, your eyebrows furrow and your lips press into a line. As if that’s going to stop you from talking.

“Wha- i’m not lying” at this point, at this point his own eyebrows met and his forehead creased, mimicking yours, a look you know all too well.

“Then what’s up with the sudden nicecapade?”

“What?”

“You’ve been nice for weeks now! You haven’t been yelling or mean or a bitch!”

He looked at you in disbelief as if you just insulted his ancestors.

“You’ve been totally nice, like- like a saint even! Okay maybe that’s an overstatement. But you get the point, right?”

Your rambling trails off when he stands up from his chair. You fear you may have offended him to cause this reaction.

Eyes following him as he walked, shock envelopes you when he stops beside you.

Things moved too quickly. One minute he was pulling back your chair and trapping you in his arms, the next his lips were on yours.

It was chilling, like ice sliding down your back. His lips were soft, not like what you were expecting, his kiss sweet yet thrilling.

Your hands unknowingly placed themselves around his neck when his head started moving. You weren’t still processing the series of events but your head moved along with his. It’s like your body knows what it wants even if you don’t yet. He was a great kisser. It felt like you were meeting a person you’ve known all along.

As his kiss deepened your hands travels to his locks, fingers curling them, occasionally pulling. You can’t deny it, he’s an amazing kisser.

He pulls away, his eyes trailing on your lips. Both of you were panting, dizzy from the best kiss you most likely ever had.

“You’re a little slow, huh?”

That’s when it struck you. The person in front of you was Ryomen Sukuna. He may look the same, but he’s totally different from the guy you thought you knew.

Hi there! I apologize for grammar and spelling mistakes, this is actually my first fic and english isn’t my first language. I hope you enjoy!!! Thank you for reading💖

[microwavepopcorn]