#when i always promised myself i'd never do either. clearly i'm too fucking stupid to even fulfill that

[detransdamnation]

God, I miss my hormones. If there was even one purely positive side effect of all those years taking the works, it would be the mood-stabilizing effect they had on me. August and September have always been my worst months emotionally and this is my first time trying to get through them without the hormones. I'm alive but that's about it and I don't even know how I made it that far. I'm not even dysphoric right now, at least not any more than I normally am. I'm just... here. I feel nothing and everything all the same. Everything hurts. Nothing does. I fill myself with hope and let it trickle out of my ears. The only three constants in my life right now are these: the craving of poison, the longing for rest, and the nostalgia for the days when I already had both.

[helloalycia]

teenage dirtbag [four] // wanda maximoff

summary: Things finally explode between you and Nate, and Pietro decides to get to the bottom of whatever is going on between you and Wanda, though in usual Pietro fashion AKA not subtly at all

warning/s: none.

author's note: this is very beefy, i must admit, but i think you'll all enjoy the outcome 😂💘

part one | part two | part three | part five | masterlist | wattpad

Dinner with the Maximoffs wasn't as strange as I envisioned. Her parents were sweet and the twins did their best to make me feel comfortable. Wanda still seemed mildly frustrated whenever Pietro and I would talk though, and I figured she may have thought I was lying when I told her I didn't like him like that. I hoped that wasn't the case.

After dinner, Wanda took me upstairs to show me her bedroom. I'm not sure how to describe it other than it seemed so Wanda.

"I'm guessing red is your favourite colour," I said when I saw the hints of scarlet in her bedroom. On her walls, in her bedding, on her pillows. Just like her car and her jacket, they were all bright and very her.

"Great observation, Sherlock," she teased with a sly smile.

I returned the smile, sticking my tongue out at her playfully, before having a walk around and coming across her massive CD collection and CD player. Her music taste was actually quite similar to mine, which I definitely didn't expect. It just made her ten times more attractive to me which wasn't good, but oh well. I was here for a good time, not a long time. And my crush on Wanda Maximoff would surely be the death of me.

"D'you have any CDs at all?" she asked, joining my side when she noticed me staring at the shelf.

I crossed my arms, glancing at her. "Don't get me wrong. I'd love to collect them, but it's just so much easier to have Spotify, y'know?"

My intention wasn't to make her laugh, but God I was glad I did when her eyes crinkled and the sound rang around the room, making my heart pinch with adoration.

After giving me some of her pyjamas, the two of us got ready and brushed our teeth before I realised she wanted me to share bed with her.

"You wanna watch some TV before bed?" she asked, clearly not registering my hesitance to slide into her Queen-sized bed.

I swallowed hard. "S-sure."

She turned on the TV at the end of her bed as I slipped in beside her, still a bit rigid as I kept a fair distance from her.

"What you feeling? Comedy? Drama? Horror?"

"Anything is fine with me," I said, still tense.

She hummed in acknowledgement before leaning down on her pile of pillows behind her, edging closer to me. My heart was hammering in my chest as her hair tickled my arm from where she was laying.

"You comfortable?" she checked in, leaning backwards so her head was upside down to see me. "I have more pillows if you need them."

I offered her a small smile, hoping it disguised my nerves. "I'm good."

She nodded before flicking through the channels and eventually settling on reruns of The Office. It took time, but I eventually overcame my initial shock of sharing bed with the girl I had a major crush on and instead relaxed, getting comfortable under the covers.

After watching some TV, we called it a night and fell asleep quite quickly, the day taking its toll on us. For once, I wasn't panicking about doing something stupid. I simply fell asleep, trying to ignore the heat she emanated from beside me.

It was a peaceful night – her bed was super comfortable – and I woke up to the sound of Wanda moving about in her bedroom.

"Shoot, I'm sorry, did I wake you?" she asked when she saw me moving about under the blankets. I tried to blink away the sleep as she continued, "I was gonna wake you soon. School starts in an hour."

I rubbed my eyes, yawning, before sitting up and seeing she was practically already dressed. That meant she would have been up for a while, meaning she would have seen me fast asleep. God, I hated when people saw me sleeping. It always felt so weird.

"It's okay," I got out tiredly, before running a hand through my hair.

"You sleep well?" she asked, spinning around in her chair, her makeup half done. "I tried my very best not to use you as a teddy bear."

She was joking, but I felt my neck grow warm at the thought and damn, it was just way too early to be flustered.

"Yeah, I slept great," I settled, feeling her gaze on me. "Thanks again for having me over."

"Anytime," she said, and something told me it wasn't just a friendly response but that she actually meant it. Maybe it was the kind smile on her lips as she said so. "Just like last night, if you wanna use anything in the bathroom, go for it."

I gave her a thumbs up, taking a moment to wake myself up a little more, before heading to the bathroom to brush my teeth. When I returned to Wanda's room, I saw she'd already made the bed and had laid my clothes on top of it.

"I've got a shirt you can borrow," she said when I grabbed my jeans.

"Oh, I can just wear the same thing again, it's no biggie," I told her, already grabbing my shirt.

She pouted before grabbing a shirt from her closet. "Just hold on. You'll love it."

In no time, she came out from her closet and held out a Paramore tee shirt on a hanger towards me.

"I got it from the last concert I went to," she explained. "I thought you'd like it."

I couldn't help but smile at the thought. "Wow, Wanda. Really? You don't mind?"

She nodded, shaking the shirt as emphasis for me to take it. I did, having a look over it and smiling to myself.

"I'll wash it and give it back to you tomorrow," I promised, taking it off the hanger and holding it with my jeans. "Thanks."

"You can keep it," she said, scratching the back of her head apprehensively. "I've got loads."

"Oh, no, I can't do that," I began to deny, but she shook her head.

"It's fine, I'm giving it to you," she said, before smiling sweetly. "I'm sure you'll look better in it anyway."

Again with the warmth spreading up my neck...

"I doubt that," I quipped with a small smile.

"Go! Go get changed," she said, already pushing me towards the door. "I'll meet you downstairs for breakfast."

I snickered, letting her shove me into the hallway, before heading into the bathroom to get ready. The shirt was oversized, so there was no need to be worried it wouldn't fit. It was actually really nice, plus I liked it that extra bit more knowing Wanda gave it to me. Though I knew I wouldn't keep it. It was hers and she was just being nice.

When I finished making myself look presentable, I headed downstairs and found the twins at the kitchen counter, chatting between themselves. Their chatter ceased when I walked in, with Wanda biting her lip and looking me up and down with satisfaction.

"I was right," was all she said, making me nervous. "You do look better in it than me."

—

The day after that, I did as I said I would and returned Wanda's shirt to her, washed, folded and ironed. Knowing she wouldn't accept it without a fight, I left it in her bag when she wasn't looking during class.

I should have expected her to approach me at my locker afterwards.

"It was supposed to be a gift," she said, and I saw her pretty face reflected in the mirror hung inside my locker.

I turned around, already knowing what she was talking about.

"I told you I couldn't accept," I said politely, giving her a small smile. "I appreciate it though." She seemed disappointed which obviously didn't help with my feelings for her, so I took a leap and added, "Maybe I can get my own at their next concert. In the summer, right?"

She picked up on what I meant and smiled, stifling a laugh. Running a hand through her hair, she met my gaze and I found myself frozen in place as always, unable to look away. I wondered if she knew what she was doing when she did that, knew that she was giving me heart palpitations every time her lips turned into a playful smirk and dark eyes studied me curiously.

My eyes drifted to her lips subconsciously and she must have put on some lip balm or something, prior to finding me just now, as they looked shiny and pink and just so damn kissable. Nate was one lucky guy.

—

Having faced issues with Nate three times now (AKA the three times he happened to launch a football at my head), I'd figured I wouldn't be seeing the last of him. He was a dick, meaning he had a natural inclination to piss people off, particularly me. But I never thought he'd go for Y/BF/N.

We were chilling by our lockers, chatting about his film project, when his books suddenly got knocked out of his hands and he was shoved against the lockers. I straightened up when I saw it was Nate, looking pissed off as he had Y/BF/N's shirt bundled in his fist.

"What the hell are you doing?!" I shouted, trying to shove him off, but he merely pushed me back.

"This isn't your business," he said to me before glaring at Y/BF/N, who was quiet with panic. "You. You've been hanging around my girlfriend and I don't like it."

The colour drained from Y/BF/N's face as Nate slammed his hand to the lockers beside his head, startling him.

"I want you to stay the fuck away from Wanda!" he ordered, and students were starting to pick up on the fight that was clearly about to break out. "You fucking hear me, you nerd? Stay the fuck away!"

Poor Y/BF/N nodded his head, eyes avoiding Nate's. Meanwhile, I was angrier than Nate probably was. Y/BF/N had done nothing wrong. Maybe Nate had just seen Wanda hanging with me and because Y/BF/N was always with me, assumed the worst. Either way, this was no way to handle the situation and I was not gonna let this dick threaten my friend.

"Get the fuck away from him, Nate," I said through gritted teeth, glaring a hole into the side of his head.

Nate barely glanced my way. "I told you this isn't your business, honey."

"Five seconds," I said, standing behind him as a crowd began to form. "You've got five seconds or I'm gonna kick you."

He seemed to ignore me as he tightened his grip on Y/BF/N's shirt, only pissing me off more.

"Five," I began to count down, the grip on my books tightening with nerves and anger. "Four."

He still didn't look my way, just kept slapping Y/BF/N's face to scare him.

"Three, two, one," I said quickly, tired of giving him the benefit of the doubt.

Without waiting anymore, I kicked him between the legs with full force, watching as he instantly let go of Y/BF/N and doubled over. Everybody began to laugh, some making 'ooh' noises, but the consensus was clear – it definitely sucked to be Nate right now.

I tried not to laugh as I watched his face scrunch with pain, turning red. I was starting to appreciate my choice of wearing my doc marten boots today.

"No more balls for the guy who keeps throwing them at my fucking head," I got out, jaw clenching.

He looked up, his face crossing with realisation as he recognised me. In response, he glared in my direction, but it didn't faze me.

"Come on, Y/BF/N," I said, looking to my startled friend. "Let's go."

"What on Earth is going on over here?!" a teacher's voice rang out in the distance, and I groaned internally.

When I turned to leave, I heard Nate from behind me, grunting with dissatisfaction.

"Fuckin' dyke," he mumbled under his breath, and I paused, clenching my fists.

"Y/N, don't–" Y/BF/N tried to stop me, but I was too pissed to care.

I spun around and punched Nate square in the face, feeling good as his smirking face scrunched in pain and his back hit the lockers from the impact.

"Woah!" a teacher came out of nowhere, shoving herself between us and pushing me away from him. "What the hell is going on here?!"

I shook my hand to ease the pain on my knuckles, though the pain couldn't stop the grin on my lips as Nate raised his hands to his face, holding his busted nose. Students were going crazy, egged on by the potential fight, and for once, I didn't mind the attention. Nate had that coming for a while now.

"Everybody back to class! Now!" the teacher yelled, glaring all around her, before her eyes settled on Nate and I. "You two. Nurse's office now."

Nate glared at me behind his bloody nose and, once again, I tried not to laugh. Y/BF/N patted my back, amazement written on his face, before letting me leave with the teacher and an unusually silent Nate.

—

Kicking Nate in the groin and punching him in the face wasn't something I did to get attention, yet that's exactly what happened. Word of the incident spread around the school quite quickly, so much in fact that even students from other grades became aware of the situation and were approaching me to tell me how awesome I was. The whole thing was definitely strange, but I could tolerate it.

What I couldn't tolerate was having Chemistry after lunch and wondering if Wanda knew.

Would she hate me for punching her boyfriend? I wasn't sure. I just knew that when she walked into class and sat next to me, I felt everyone's eyes subtly watching us as if waiting for her to explode at me.

I'd been given an ice pack for my bruised hand after my visit to the nurse's office earlier whilst Nate had been treated for his broken nose (the fact that I'd broken it was hilarious to me, since I knew I wasn't even that strong). The principal had a very angry yell at us both in his office, neither of us willing to reveal the premise of our fight, before giving us detention every day after school for two weeks straight as punishment. Of course, Nate got his two weeks at a different time to mine for fear I'd punch him again (he definitely didn't like that, but he couldn't exactly say that to to principal).

I didn't bother using the ice pack in Chemistry for fear Wanda may ask what was up. I successfully managed to hide my hand and as a second surprise of the day, Wanda mentioned nothing about the incident. Not one thing about her boyfriend, about Y/BF/N, about any of it. I thought she might hint at it, trying to get me to bring it up. But she didn't which made me think she actually had no idea it even happened. Had anyone told her? Had he told her? Nah, probably not. His fragile masculinity probably caused him to change the story to something else so he didn't look like a wimp in front of his girlfriend.

Whatever it was, I was safe for now.

Thinking I'd got away with a confrontation from Wanda, I went about the rest of my day as usual. Well, that was until I was replacing some books in my locker at the end of the day and saw Wanda at her locker behind me, arguing with– yep, you guessed it. Nate.

Y/BF/N was collecting some books from his own locker beside me and we both exchanged looks as we saw the two lovebirds in a heated argument. Just when we were about to leave, someone cleared their throat from behind us, making us turn around.

Wanda was stood there, backpack hanging from her shoulder, beside Nate, who looked like he would rather be anywhere else but here.

"Hi," he started quietly, making Wanda clear her throat. He glanced at her before looking to Y/BF/N. "Look, man, I'm really sorry about earlier. I was wrong about what I said. We cool?"

I tried not to laugh at the way Nate was being forced to apologise by his girlfriend. Y/BF/N glanced to me with questioning eyes, so I simply shrugged.

"I guess...," he finally answered Nate, still a little awkward.

Nate nodded before looking to me. He still had his reservations, judging from the twitch in his expression, but for Wanda's sake, he kept his cool.

"I'm sorry for treating you badly," he said reluctantly. "With the football and just generally."

God, it was so hard not to laugh in his face right now. His nose had gauze taped to it and it made him look like an idiot. I fake coughed to disguise my smile, before meeting his gaze.

"It's, er, cool," I said, not in the mood to be an arsehole to him, even though he deserved it. I'd punched him – I think we were equal for now.

He nodded, before staying quiet. Glancing to Wanda, he waited for her to say something. She rolled her eyes and nodded for him to leave. When he was gone, she sighed tiredly.

"I only heard about what happened after Chem class," she said, mainly to me, a guilty expression on her lips. "I'm so sorry he acted like a jerk."

I chewed my lip, unsure what to say.

"It's okay, Y/N here took care of it," Y/BF/N said, smiling with amusement at me. Okay, well now she definitely knew.

"Yeah, sorry you felt you had to do that," she said with a grimace. "I guess he deserved it though."

"Kind of," I agreed, before noticing the regretful frown on her lips. "He apologised though. It's already happened. I kinda broke his nose... No point in dwelling on it."

She smiled, though it didn't reach her eyes. "Yeah..." Her eyes fell to my bruised hand before lifting it gently. I winced at the ache, but let her hold it, studying the purple bruise painted across my knuckles. "That looks bad."

It felt good punching him though, but I wasn't about to say that since it was her boyfriend I was talking about.

"It's alright," I said dismissively, shrugging. "Nate kind of got it worse. I'll live."

The pad of her thumb stroked the bruise gently and I held my breath, the feeling of her hands holding mine sending shivers up my arm. Her eyes flickered to mine, softened with guilt, before she let go of my hand.

"I should head home," she said after a pause. "I'll see you both tomorrow."

"See you tomorrow," Y/BF/N said for both of us, sensing my loss of words.

Wanda held my gaze once more, eyes half lidded as they glanced down. Before I could even question what she was looking at, she waved goodbye and left.

"She's either starting to realise what a dick her boyfriend is or she's just really into you," Y/BF/N said, patting me on the back. "Maybe both, who knows?"

—

"You definitely cheated," I told Y/BF/N once we finished yet another round of air hockey. "Nobody wins six times in a row like that!"

He laughed at my expression. "Tell me, dear Y/N. How would I cheat? The concept of the game is simple, really. It's not my fault you're terrible."

I rolled my eyes lightheartedly. "Seventh time's the charm. C'mon."

He chuckled, about to put more money in the machine, before his eyes got distracted by something behind me. "Well, would you look at that. The Maximoff twins are here."

"Very funny," I said with a knowing look. "You can't throw me off like that. We've established I'm already terrible. Now c'mon. Let's go!"

"I wish I was joking," he said, shaking his head.

I scoffed, not believing him, and turned around to prove him wrong, but I was surprised when I saw Wanda and Pietro walking into the arcade we were in. They seemed to spot us instantly, waving in our direction before approaching us.

"Fancy seeing you here," Pietro teased with a smile as they stopped before us.

I cracked a smile as Y/BF/N joined my side. "We're hanging out. And you?"

Wrapping an arm around his sister's shoulder, he tugged Wanda close to him. "Sibling bonding time."

Wanda rolled her eyes at his childishness, but I could tell she found it endearing all the same.

"Well, if you want, you can hang with us," Y/BF/N offered, and we all looked to him, myself raising a brow his way. He seemed to sense my reluctance, it egging him on as he grinned at them. "Y/N doesn't mind. Do you, Y/N?"

I swallowed hard as I looked between the twins. "'Course not."

And that's how I found myself playing arcade games with the Maximoff twins that Saturday afternoon. It was actually pretty fun, with Pietro being as competitive as I was and Wanda being the sweetest loser with everything she played. It was so adorable, but I ended up letting her win some games of skee-ball just so I could see that cute nose scrunch of hers as she realised she'd won.

"You gonna let me win like that, too?" Pietro caught on as he took his sister's place in playing against me. He had a mischievous grin on his lips and I felt my mouth go dry at what he was implying.

"You wish," I said, playing it cool, though I wondered if he cared that I clearly let Wanda win. He wouldn't read into it, right?

Pietro took his go as he spoke. "So, I heard what happened with you and Nate at school last week."

I closed my eyes, cringing at the reminder. Pietro merely laughed.

"You kicked him super hard, right?" he asked excitedly. "I heard his face went so red with anger that you could fry an egg on it! And don't forget that punch, goddamn what I would pay to have seen that!"

"Pietro!" Wanda scolded from behind us as her and Y/BF/N played air hockey. "Don't be a tool!"

I felt my face heat up with embarrassment as Pietro continued to laugh. Y/BF/N joined in whilst Wanda tried to hide the smile dancing on her lips.

"You're not even together anymore," Pietro called to Wanda between laughter. Wait, did I hear that right?

"You and Nate broke up?" Y/BF/N asked with disbelief. "Our grade's 'it' couple broke up?"

Wanda ran a hand through her hair to distract from her flittering eyes. "He treated you horribly last week. Both of you." She glanced my way before looking at her shoes. "He was a jerk. It was long overdue... Also, I would have broken up with him there and then had I known what he'd said to you. I'm sorry he said what he did."

She stared at me with apologetic eyes and I wasn't sure what to say or do other than nod awkwardly and look away. The fact that she'd broken up with him put a smile on my face though.

"I just think it's awesome," Pietro admitted, before saluting playfully to me. "Thank you for your service. I knew you were awesome, but this is a whole new level."

I sighed, attempting to hide my smile, before straightening up to play. Pietro and I played some skee-ball before I decided to have a go at the claw machine. Wanda was at the one beside me, attempting to win herself a fluffy black cat plush toy. She'd had three goes before giving up, admitting to defeat.

"Typical Wanda," Pietro teased. "Giving up when the going gets tough."

She punched him in the arm, making him jump and rub it. That elicited a smile from her, making me laugh at their immaturity.

"How about Wanda and I go and get a table in the diner next door whilst you finish up winning whatever it is you're trying to win?" Y/BF/N asked, looking to me, as if assigning blame.

"I already told you, I'm not leaving this machine until I win at least one thing," I stated stubbornly.

"The amount of money you've put into the machine won't make up for whatever you win," Y/BF/N teased with amusement.

"Just go," I said, waving my hand dismissively. "I'll be there soon."

"I'll wait with her," Pietro said, resting a hand on my shoulder, making me shrug him off jokingly. "See you soon," he added with a laugh, to his sister and Y/BF/N.

When they left, I looked to Pietro with an amused smile. "I don't need you to look after me, y'know."

He shrugged and looked through the glass of the claw machine. "I know. But I stayed to give you some advice, princess."

"Oh, really? And what advice is that?" I asked, before putting some coins in the machine to have another go.

"People usually tend to win these things for people they like, right?" he asked, nodding to the plush toys in the machine.

"Or for themselves," I corrected with a curious smile. "Take Wanda for example. How badly did she want that cat?"

He crossed his arms, smiling with amusement. "You could win it for her, y'know."

"What?" I asked, half paying attention as I attempted to grab a teddy bear.

"Win the cat for my sister and give it to her?"

I ended up dropping the teddy from the claw as I looked to Pietro with shock. He laughed at my expression, leaning against the machine.

"You do like her, right? Otherwise this is awkward," he added as an afterthought, looking down and smiling to himself.

My jaw hung open. "I– er– I never really– I don't–"

"She must definitely like you," Pietro noted, glancing at me.

I licked my lips as I found my words. "Did she," I cleared my throat, "did she say something?"

"Well, no," he said, "but she looks like she wants to murder me every time I hang out with you."

"That's just a coincidence," I said, shaking my head and looking back to the machine. "She's not–" I thought about, before shaking my head again. "No."

I appreciated Pietro's help, but Wanda definitely didn't like me like that. She was just protective of her brother and friendly to me. It didn't mean anything.

"Look, you don't have to listen to me," he said, straightening up and looking at the machine as I slotted another coin in. "But you could give it a shot. See what happens."

I glanced at him, his blue eyes watching me knowingly, a matching smirk on his lips.

"Fine," I gave in, hoping it wouldn't backfire. "Let's see what happens..."

[the-avengers-ate-my-tongue]

The Storm

Summary: You work with Jack Crawford and Alana is your cousin, both of you live together for a long time. She gets caught up with a flat tire far away and asks you to let Will in, for he's expecting her. A storm is coming, and she keeps taking longer and longer to show up. Will the universe conspire in your favor?

Pairing: Will Graham x reader

Warnings: swearing, insinuation of smut, fluff.

Word count: 4.328

A/n: I'm starting to consider changing this tumblr for a Hannibal one, mostly Will Graham, so some requests from other fandoms would be nice haha hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing ♥️

*not my gif

There wasn't a thing such as a boring day at the BAU. 

At least not when you're part of Jack Crawford's crew. There was always an interesting case to focus on, a disfigured body to study the reason of death, it was always a thrilling hunt for evidence. The best experience I've ever had so far in my career, and I could only thank my cousin Alana for putting me on the Guru's radar. I was a great crime scene investigator, albeit a little younger than people gave me credit for. I taught people not to underestimate me over the years, though. I got here by my own effort, being a tenacious, hard-working woman who wouldn't get a no for an answer. 

I got along well with my crewmates, Beverly Katz, Brian Zeller and Jimmy Price, though our relationship hardly extended for life outside work. Except for Beverly, we went out for a couple of beers sometimes, she was fun, witty and I really liked our conversations. Jack was the big boss, and that was it. I had a lot of respect for him, and I knew he didn't regret bringing me to his team, I could see it in his eyes in the first case I've got. I was very cunning when I shared my insights about the cases, sometimes I saw things no one else could, no one but…

Of course, I was far, far away from being a Will Graham. But ever since I was younger, I've had this sort of intuition that helped me to solve problems, I would solve riddles easily and when people asked me how I got to the answer, I wouldn't know the steps, I just knew deep in my bones I was right. That happened a lot when I was growing up and was even stronger now that I knew how to use it. It was some artifice of my inconscient, something I could always count on. It included everything in my life, math, logical thinking, riddles. My brain picked things I couldn't perceive clearly, bringing them to the clear waters of my conscience. 

Will Graham was a curious man. He intrigued me from the very first moment I saw him at the house of one of the last victims of The Minnesota Shrike, Garret Jacob Hobbs, now dead. He was practically hiding in a corner, his eyes closed behind the lens of his glasses, dark wavy hair, jawline for days. He seemed highly focused until Beverly started to talk to him, pulling him out of his daze. He could barely look at her, or at me, and although he looked socially awkward and troubled, he still managed to look like a daydream. I studied every inch of his face, lowering my gaze when he seemed to get uncomfortable, after smiling lightly. I was a bit shy myself. I lived with Alana and, when I got home that night, I absentmindedly asked her about that curious handsome man who seemed to be out of place, yet so connected to that scene. She started to talk about him, but stopped once she noticed my interest. Then, she told me he was a very unstable person, that she wouldn't even be alone in the room with him because of her professional curiosity. As time passed and he solved more and more cases, I could see how people looked at him like an attraction of the zoo. However, not me, and later, not Beverly. Brian didn't seem to like him very much, I could see. Envy, perhaps? Nevertheless, the more I saw Will, the more intrigued I got. He avoided eye contact like the plague, but as I was always friendly and tried my best to treat him like a normal person, not focusing only on work, dead bodies and serial killers, I saw more of those beautiful blue eyes. He knew I was Alana's cousin, and I sooner realized he had a fling for her. 

And boy, did that break my silly little heart. I wasn't surprised, though. Who could blame him? Alana was amazing. I never felt resentful for that, but as time passed, I started to detach from the idea of Will being somewhat more than a simple acquaintance. That afternoon, I was going home from work when I got a call from Alana.

"Speak fast, I'm driving." I said, keeping one hand on the wheel and the other holding my phone.

"You're going home? Great. I invited Will so we could talk about a profile I'm building, but I got caught up here. I already spoke to him, he's almost there, can you let him in? He said he'll wait, and I'll be home in about fifty minutes, no more than that, hopefully." She said in a hurry, and I felt my cheeks burn a little. Will and me? Home alone? 

"I…" I hesitated, chewing my bottom lip nervously. "You won't be long, right? Heard on the radio there’s a storm for later."

"I won't, promise. Just let him in, he's already aware I'll take a little longer to be there. See you soon. Thanks, Y/n!" She hung up, not leaving me any time to answer. I put the phone down, still chewing on my bottom lip. I could feel excitement rising on my stomach, making me feel slightly nauseated, and noticed my hands starting to sweat.

Please. That was ridiculous. What was I, a teenager? I was a grown-up, well-succeeded woman, for God's sake. I rubbed my hands on my jeans, driving a little faster than I usually did almost unconsciously. I got home after twenty minutes, parking outside the pretty house. Will was already there, leaning against his car, so lost in his thoughts he barely noticed I'd arrived. I looked at my reflection at the mirror hurriedly, fixing my hair, pinching my cheeks to look less pale, brushing my eyebrows with my fingers to make them look neat. I wasn't even wearing any lipstick today. It had been a long day at work. 

I opened the car door, exiting the vehicle, the noise from shutting the door finally bringing him out of his daze, and he finally seemed to notice me. He smiled lightly, lowering his eyes. He had his glasses on, but as soon as he saw me, he took them off, hanging them on his shirt.

"Hey, Will. I hope I haven't kept you waiting too long. There was a little bit of traffic." I justified, walking to the porch and waiting for him to follow me. 

"Y/n. Not at all, I just got here. Alana explained what happened, thanks for coming to let me in. Hope I didn't ruin any appointment you may have had." He waited until I unlocked the door, and we finally were engulfed with the warm air of the heater.

"Nope, I was coming home, no appointments lost. Please, come in. I'm not sure you've ever been here before, but make yourself home." I hung my trench coat, sighing with the pleasure of being home. I loved the atmosphere of that place. "Can I get you anything? Water, soda, beer…"

"Thank you. I'm fine. And no, I haven't been here before." I held back the temptation of saying "good", biting my bottom lip as I watched him sit on the couch. I just stood there for a while, not sure of what to do next. 

He frowned a little, probably thinking why I was acting so weird, and that made me nervous, because it was just an easy step to realize my silly crush on him. Did he know? What if Alana said something? Said something? For fuck's sake, he was Will Graham, he could probably see that written across my stupid face! Shit, he knows. I'm making a fool of myself. Why do I even…

"Is everything okay?" His voice startled me a little, pulling me out of my neurotic breakdown, and I wondered how my facial expressions looked. Was I blinking only one eye like the stereotyped madness of cartoons? I certainly didn't look normal. I cleared my throat, laughing lightly.

"Yeah. Yeah, I guess I'm not really used to having people over anymore. I've been working a lot lately. People are dying like flies." I sat on the armchair in front of him, sighing. 

"What we do can be overwhelming sometimes. What we see every day. It just… stains you." He said, with a dark look on his serious eyes. 

I nodded. I felt that way sometimes, but I was used to it. I stopped feeling that sense of inadequacy on my chest years ago. 

"I guess you just begin to cope with it, though. Our brain adapts to that harsh reality. But it's always nice to vent somehow. What do you do in your free time?" I asked, wondering if I was getting too personal. Did I sound like I was probing to ask him out?  I felt my face getting warm. Damn it.

Either he didn't realize, or he was just too chivalrous to point, but he didn't mention anything.

"I fish." He said, simply. I nodded with a light smile.

"And you play with your doggies." I pointed, smiling wider. I loved dogs. He'd mentioned them before, so I just brought the subject up, trying to shift the attention from me to them. Will smiled back, his eyes with a subtle glow. He really loved them, and that was so sweet. "Fishing sounds nice. Unfortunately, I could never. I'm too restless. I'd probably startle all the fish and wouldn't catch anything."

He laughed, and that was the first time I ever heard that sound coming out of him. I felt like I was someone deaf that was able to hear the sound of Mozart's symphonies for the first time, and I just knew. There was never detachment from the idea of Will being more than an acquaintance. It was tackled down inside my brain somewhere, for the brain tends to adapt to harsh realities, but it was still there, just waiting for some incentive. 

"It's just a matter of training, getting used to it. I could teach you someday… if you want." He blinked a few times, as if he was surprised with his own boldness, smiling lightly. "And you? What do you do to vent?" He asked, seeming genuinely interested.

"Well, I read a lot. Maybe I could read by the riverside while I watch you fish." I said, shrugging with a subtle smile.

"It's a date, then?" Will inquired, making me mortified. Caught me by total surprise, and when I was about to say something, my phone rang.

"Excuse me." I answered the phone. It was Alana. "Hey. We're already here waiting for you."

Not that I wanted her to arrive any time sooner, but she didn't have to know that.

"You won't believe me; I've got a flat tire. There's a guy helping me out, I was lucky, I'm in the middle of nowhere. But I'll get there in about fifty more minutes, more or less. Can you put Will on the phone? I'll explain everything to him."

"Do you need one of us to pick you up? I'm sure he wouldn't mind, I wouldn't…"

"No, he's almost done. Thank you. Let me talk to Will, I'll be there soon. The storm is about to catch me, I wanna hurry."

I sighed, grimacing at him. 

"She wants to talk to you." I passed him the phone, studying his expressions while he talked to her. As I looked at the window, I could see the dark clouds gathering up, making the end of the afternoon murky. The storm was about to hit hard. I could see a few thin drops of rain starting to wet the glass.

"I can stay a little longer, no problem. I'm being well attended." He traded looks with me, biting his lip slightly. "Okay. I'll see you soon, Alana."

He gave me the phone, but Alana was already gone. I put it on the coffee table, getting up.

"I think I'll pour myself some wine. Do you want some?" I asked politely. "It's one of the fanciest ones; Hannibal gave us a bottle when we dined at his house a few days ago."

"Yes. Thank you." He waited for me to come back with the beverages, and I did my best not to spill anything, sitting on the couch beside him while I gave him the glass. "So you're acquainted with Dr. Lecter?"

"Oh yeah, he's an old friend of Alana's, sometimes he invites us to dinner. He cooks the best meals I've ever had in my entire life, so I don't exactly decline the invitations. And he's one of the most brilliant people I've ever met, so it's always interesting." I took a sip of the crimson liquid, moaning low in pleasure. Good wine. I preferred a good cup of hot oolong, but it was impossible not to appreciate the quality of that drink. 

A few glasses after and a lot of talks about dogs, fishing and other hobbies, he finally felt safe to bring back the topic. The rain had started really pouring, the now thicker drops hitting the windows loudly. Alana hadn't called again. It was nighttime now, the sky seeming to be darker than usual. I was low-key worried about her, but the conversation was too great to interrupt. She was a good driver. She would be just fine. 

"I've been seeing Hannibal Lecter in his office. Not exactly his patient, though. A courtesy of Jack Crawford to keep an eye on the coping of my brain functions." He sounded a bit bitter, drinking a few sips of his wine.

I could see he didn't like therapy. Must be hard with someone with a mind like his.

"You know, sometimes, Alana psychoanalyses me. Like, she doesn't even notice. It's cute, but sometimes it creeps me out." 

"She has a professional curiosity about me, but she's too polite and considerate to let it slip out. We've never even been alone in the same room together."

I held back a bitter comment, not wanting to talk shit about my cousin, but he saw it right through me. 

"Sorry, I didn't mean to put you in a complicated position."

"I know. You're sweet." The word slipped through my tongue before I could contain it. Will blinked a few times, seeming surprised, and I felt my cheeks burn, starting to stutter. "I meant… I'm sorry, did I make you uncomfortable?"

"No, no. It's just… no one's ever called me that before." It was my time to get surprised. He didn't seem to be complimented much, and that just made me flabbergasted. I couldn't be the only one who saw how fantastic Will was.

"... Ah. Well, some people are just shy. I'm shy as hell, don't even know how I had the nerve to say that, it's probably the wine starting to kick in. Hope I really didn't make you uncomfortable, though. Don't need to be polite, it's okay to tell me."

"Actually, I'm curious to know what else you think of me. I sense it's not the only word you have to define me." He sounded bolder, and his eyes were on mine, giving me shivers down my spine. 

"Well… I think you're too exceptional to be defined with a few words. You're… Kind, brilliant… I see how seeing what you see, doing what you do, how it wrecks you sometimes, and you just keep doing it because you're saving lives. That's so selfless, Will. That's…" I was going to say more, but at that very moment, a loud thunder just made the house practically tremble, and I let out a real inelegant weep, coming closer to Will and holding his arm firmly, my fingers grabbing on the fabric of his shirt. He could've thought it was an artifice to get closer to him, but he could see how frightened I was, trembling like a cornered wild little beast. I hated thunders, fireworks, anything loud. Feeling ridiculous, I released his shirt, apologizing with embarrassment.

"It's okay. It's just noise. I'm here." He put some of my hair that had fallen to my face behind my ear with such a tenderness that I felt my stomach twitch, realizing suddenly how close we were. He was looking at me as if it was the first time he was actually seeing me. 

The phone rang again. Alana! I grabbed it from the coffee table, turning to face Will. He wasn't avoiding eye contact anymore, his pupils were dilated. My breathing was accelerated, and I knew it had little to do with the thunder.

"Lana, is everything okay?" I asked with genuine concern. "Are you close?"

"Ah, Y/n. I'm so sorry. I don't think I'll make it in time, I'm driving slow, the roads are slippery because of the storm and it's pretty foggy. I'll stop at a motel and spend the night, or at least wait for the storm to pass. I'm so furious with myself!"

"It's okay cuz, do what's safer for you. I'm sure Will will understand. I'll pass him the phone." I gave him the phone and he talked to Alana for a few minutes, but I wasn't listening. She'd ruined the moment unintentionally, and now he was probably going home. When would I have an opportunity like that again? 

"Okay. Don't worry. I'll see you tomorrow. Bye, Alana. Take care." He gave me the phone and I put it on the coffee table again. Before any of us could say anything, another thunder cracked the sky, and this time, Will held me so I wouldn't be afraid. The lights went out, and he held me against his chest protectively, making me smell his aftershave and some perfume. He smelled so good. For a moment, I just stood there in his arms, feeling his warmth, his breath, the steady beats of his heart. 

I moved away just a little to see his face, very close to mine, but it was so dark I could only see shadows. A lightning lit up the room and, just for a little moment, I could see his gorgeous eyes staring at me. After a soft touch of his thumb on my lips, he finally kissed me, so gentle, like I could break as fine china with any rougher move. I touched his neck with both my hands, playing with his hair, feeling how soft they were. He pulled me closer, his hands on my waist, and the kiss started to get deeper, voracious, as if we were hungry for each other. Maybe the wine was helping to raise the lust; all I know is that I've wanted that to happen for a long time. Will's kiss was everything I imagined it would be, but entirely different at the same time. All I could say was that he was great at it. His hands traveled through my body, and I grabbed his hair, pulling it slightly. That made a low growl echo through his chest, and I started to feel my body fervent as a bonfire.

I couldn't say much because I was breathless and I didn't want to stop what we were doing, so a single word left my lips as I kept my forehead on his.

"Stay."

Will bit his lip, kissing me again, and that was all the answer I needed.

xx 

Morning. Thin sunrays illuminated my bedroom floor through the curtains, waking me up. The storm was gone. I haven't had a nice night of sleep like that in ages. I looked at the other side of my bed and there was Will, sleeping heavily. It wasn't a dream, after all. Last night really happened. I smiled, staring at the roof with disbelief in my eyes.

I stared at him for a few seconds, unsure of what to do. Should I just let him sleep? He looked so heavenly, his hair was messy, his breathing steady, he seemed so less troubled than he usually was. I touched his hair lightly, caressing it with tenderness, and he started to move. I could see his neck, and a few hickies we marked on his albescent skin. That made me blush a little bit, and I laughed silently. 

He opened his eyes while I still touched his hair, but I didn't stop, and he didn't seem to want me to. We stared at each other in silence for a few moments, and he smiled, a different smile than the usual ones he gave me.

"Hi." He said, pulling me closer by my waist, stroking the skin under the sheets. I pecked him on the lips, then kissing his forehead, his cheek, his jawline. 

"Hey there. Good morning. I'm starving, are you having breakfast with me?"

"Actually, I gotta go home. Feed the dogs." He said, stroking my nude shoulder with his finger.

"Of course. Your dogs. I won't keep you then, poor babies must be so hungry." I kissed his cheek and was about to get up when he pulled me again, gently kissing my lips. I smiled, probably looking like an idiot. A joyful idiot. "I'll let you get dressed. I'll be in the kitchen."

I dressed up in my long and black robe, smiling at him before I left the room, going to the kitchen, where I started to make some french toasts. After a few minutes, I heard the front door open, and an exhausted Alana came in, her hair frizzy and her coat looking still a bit wet.

"Oh, Lana! Go change, you'll get a cold!" I stopped what I was doing, going to her and helping to take off her coat.

"That storm was a nightmare. I swear I won't ignore the warnings ever again. I'm so sorry, I had no idea it would get this bad, yesterday was one of those days where everything just goes wrong. Hope Will arrived well at home, did he seem disappointed or annoyed before he left? I was so inconvenient…"

I didn't even have time to answer, because Will opened my bedroom door, coming out while buttoning his shirt, suddenly realizing Alana was there.

"Oh." Alana said, looking so flabbergasted I almost laughed at her. Will rose his eyebrows at the sight of her, seeming a bit unsure of what to do or say. I wasn't planning for her to find out like this, it was a bit early, I wasn't expecting her to arrive so soon. "Hi, Will."

"Alana. Hi." He avoided looking at her, staring at me, and his eyes immediately softened. I smiled, he smiled back, and that was it, Alana was forgotten.

"Off you go to feed your children." I joked, biting my bottom lip. "I guess I'll see you later, then."

"Definitely." He simply said, kissing my forehead while caressing my hair, certainly a little embarrassed to kiss me in front of Alana. "See you later, Y/n. Bye, Alana."

"Bye, Will." I waved with a soft smile, and he grabbed his jacket, leaving the house.

My smile grew larger and I left my head fall back, squeaking low in commemoration. What a night! What a morning! I never thought I would thank a storm so much, let alone a bloody thunder.

Before Alana could say anything, I realized Will had left his glasses at the coffee table, and I picked it up in a hurry, bursting through the front door and calling him before he left, waving in front of the car.

"You forgot your glasses!" I said, and he opened the car windows, raising his hand to pick them.

I leaned against the car window, putting the glasses on him, and kissing his lips fiercely. He moaned in surprise, holding my face to deepen the kiss. After a moment, I pulled away, appreciating the view of his lips so reddish. 

"Go back inside, it's cold." He said with a cheeky smile, and before I could say he actually made me hotter, he took off with the car.

I went back inside, where Alana was waiting for me with her arms crossed. 

"What the hell did you do to Will Graham?" She asked, sounding severe, but a smile was trying to escape her lips "I mean, besides trying to suck his soul with your mouth a few moments ago."

"Oh, shut up!" I laughed, blushing violently. "You made that happen, you know? Thank you. Was that a set up or did the universe actually conspire in my favor?"

"I wish I'd planned this. That would mean I would've had a plan b and I wouldn't have stayed at that disgusting mote… Y/n, you're full of hickies, I can't believe you!"

"You're starting to sound like my mom, Lana. I'm gonna wear a turtleneck, don't worry, I don't want Beverly all over me like a bloodhound and Brian and Jimmy's witty comments today. In fact, keep it to yourself, okay? Will's discreet. I won't even tell Beverly, if she finds out, the whole bureau will know, hell, maybe even Freddie Lounds."

"I told you to let it go, Y/n. Will's very unstable right now. I… I only want what's best for you." She said with concern in her bright blue eyes. I sighed, walking to her and kissing her cheek with affection.

"You're a good cousin. But I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself, okay? Unless this isn't only about me, unless it concerns something else." I raised an eyebrow while staring at her, more confident that I've ever been. "Is there something you wanna tell me?"

She hesitated, clenching her jaw, but never spoke. 

I smiled, tapping her cheek very lightly in approval.

"I gotta get ready to work. Wanna grab lunch with me later?" I asked in a casual tone, a cynical smile on my face. She shrugged. "See you later then, cuz."

[shnuggletea]

InuKagWeek 2020

Alright, to those of you still here, thank you! To those of you who left... eh, it's your choice. Anyway, here is chapter two day two of InuKagweek 2020! Loyalty. @inukag-week thanks for the poster art and here’s my day two! Still working on my own art for this piece. Something I was working on a while ago and quit. Hence why Kagome looks way better if you ask me. Thank you @petri808​ for showing me a few tricks for my posts on tumblr!

Chapter 2 of 8 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8

Fanfiction link HERE

AO3 link HERE

Or if you’d rather, just reading reading!

Loyalty

If I'm being honest, I never had a job in food service. But I had to assume they were all the same mostly. Things like learning the names of the drinks and the regular customers as well as how to handle a tray filled with heavy things were to be expected. However, given my place of 'work', getting grabbed, touched, and pinched wasn't. Two weeks later and I was as used to it as you could be. When you go from living in a girls home, sharing a room, and counseling sweet innocent children to your own space in a mansion and bringing drinks backstage to the dancers, it would never feel normal.

The girls were nice enough though and I never saw Inuyasha which I was fine with. Mostly.

I'd even made friends with most of those that worked there. Some were just there to strip and make money so a little inexperienced waitress wasn't worth their time. Which was fine. But my favorite was a girl named Sango.

Her eyes brightened at the sight of me, a smile on her pretty face as she paused in putting on her fake lashes. I handed off the other drinks, giving Sango her whiskey sour last. "Oh, I do love the nights you're working Kagome."

"Which is every night?"

Sango giggled, taking a sip and moaning her appreciation of the flavor. "Yes. But you are so quick with our orders. The others take forever."

"I just don't want you guys going without some liquid courage. I couldn't do what you guys do."

Sango tisked her tongue at me as I leaned against her vanity table. "It's not that bad. I mean, the audition was a little awkward."

"Audition?"

Sango went back to her makeup, lining her lips with a dark red lipstick. "Yeah. Having to get naked in from of the boss? That was nerve-wracking, wasn't it? Naomi told me she had to do the same thing even as a server. You had to too right?"

I shuttered. So everyone had to do that? Inuyasha had slept with every single girl in this place as an audition? Was that what that was? I lost my virginity to a man like that?

I swallowed my disgust and the rising vomit in my throat, suddenly feeling a desperate need to get checked for STDs because he definitely didn't wear a condom with me, and pushed off the table. "I should get back to it."

"Yep yep. Don't want the boss to catch you slacking!"

As if he could, he was never here. Too busy 'auditioning' more girls. The only one here every day, giving me a hard time, was Koga. He was always somewhere around the club, waiting to bark at me for doing something wrong or touch me. It was never in an inappropriate place but it was still unwanted. A hand on my shoulder or a push to my back. Once, he patted my butt and I nearly tore his arm off. He hasn't done it since but I see him do it to the others all the time.

Returning to one of my tables, I leaned in to be heard over the loud music. The girl on stage now was talented for sure so I was always surprised when anyone gave me their attention over those on stage. Probably thanks to the required low cut top I had to wear. It wasn't even a top really, it was a vest and I barely fit in it. There definitely wasn't room for a bra. And the pants sat low on my hips so my skin showed all the time. Every time I leaned over, I waited for a breast to fall out. Not that anyone would mind, save for me.

Plastering a smile on my face, I listened as the guy I was attending rattled off a drink order as slowly as he could to keep me there longer. It was a struggle to keep my fake smile up. He finally finished, certain he was touching himself under the table the whole time, I fled to the bar. Far from safe, it still had fewer men ogling me at it.

I rested, waiting for my order and Naomi stood next to me. "Hey, Kagome? I'm not really sure I should say something but...there's a guy here who keeps sitting in my section and watching you."

I suppose stalkers were a normal thing here. It didn't mean I was okay with it. "He's watching me? With that going on?"

I thumbed towards the stage as Sango did a super sexy split on the pole. Not sure what I'd do with myself if I was ever that sexy but it was nice to dream. "Well...I've only been here a few days but yeah. I wasn't going to tell you until I was sure. I mean he's far less creepy than the other guy that watches you…"

"There are two guys watching me?!"

She grabbed my shoulders to reassure me. "I'm not really sure! I haven't even been here a week yet. But it seems like this guy is definitely here to watch you. He sits in the corner booth in the back so he can see you but you never seem to see him…" I gently pulled from her hold and made the quick decision to face the creep. "Wait, Kagome!"

I waved back to her, heading off towards the mentioned table. "Don't worry, I won't get you in trouble."

I didn't have to go all the way to the table, figuring out pretty quickly who it was. Shaking my head and growling a laugh in irritation, I walked right up to Inuyasha who looked a little taken aback that I seemed to notice him. Crossing my arms over my chest served two purposes; hiding my overexposed breasts and showing him how pissed I was at him in general. How the hell did Naomi not know who this was? She auditioned for him last week!

Setting his drink down carefully, he cleared his throat over the loud music and adjusted his seat. "I just wanted to check on you, that's all. See how my investment was holding up."

That wasn't good enough for me and I told him as much by not changing or saying a thing.

"This is my club, damnit, I can come in and do whatever the fuck I want."

"Yes you can, Boss," Koga said, coming up from behind out of nowhere. "Everything up to your standards?"

There was something about Koga. He said one thing but clearly felt another. Inuyasha had to be ignoring it, no way he missed the indignation in Koga's demeanor. "Everything is fine, Koga. Except for your customers getting too handsy with the wait staff!"

To my added irrigation, Koga put his hands on my shoulders as if to hold me steady. Never did I ever need another to keep me steady or still and now wasn't the exception. I glared over my shoulder at him but he ignored me. But then his hands popped off me as if burned and I turned back to Inuyasha who looked ready to kill someone. And that someone was Koga so he stepped further away from me.

"I'll..uh...I'll see what I can do about that, Sir."

Just the two of us again, I turned to leave but Inuyasha called out to me again. "Looks like you're blending in here. A real chameleon or just within your element here?"

Turning on my heel, I stormed back up to his table. Leaning over I put my finger as close to his face as I could. "I survive. It's what I've always done and those girls back at the home wouldn't if they were tossed out on the street. So remember that when you think I'm okay with any of this. With you, this place, getting my ass grabbed daily, or even going through your audition. I'm a survivor and I will survive this."

He had backed up a little in his seat but I'd rid the distance in an instant. Big golden eyes danced between my finger, eyes, and lips. "I can see that." I slowly removed myself from his bubble and he crossed his arms over his chest like he was the one wronged. "I said I was sorry the other night. I lost control and took things too far…"

"Do you say that to all the others too? Is this your blanket apology for using women the way that you do?"

He had been looking toward the exit but snapped back to me with my words. "What are you talking about?"

I huffed, pissed to the point of tears. "Fine. Play dumb. Stop coming here and watching me. I'm not going to screw up your stupid club."

He tried to say something but I really wasn't interested. It wasn't like we didn't live together, not that I ever saw him at home either. If he really wanted to talk to me, he could do it there.

I caught Koga grinning at me as I stormed away, feeling Inuyasha's glare on my back. All I could think was that I really had fallen into a den of demons somehow.

oOo

Checking every day, every hour, I didn't see Inuyasha return. A week had passed and he hadn't come back to the club. Meaning things went back to the way they were, not seeing or hearing from him at all. This time I was glad.

That is until I got to work on another Friday night.

The place was packed and Koga was far too pleased about it. "Kagome you're going on stage tonight."

"Wait, what?!"

"We're short-staffed and I've gotten requests. So you're dancing tonight. Be ready to go on after Kiki."

I was numb, staring at my reflection at the vanity that Sango let me use. She was doing something with my hair but I felt none of it. The only man I'd ever been naked in front of was Inuyasha and I was fine with that. It was a livable condition to my servitude. But now I was going to be naked in front of a ton more. As I said, the place was packed tonight so easily 50-60 people were going to see my bush.

"It's not that big a deal, Kagome, I promise."

"That's easy for you to say! You can dance! And you're super sexy."

Sango sat down beside her and frowned. "You're sexy!" When I frowned in return, she kept on. "You are! Plus, dancing isn't so bad. You're alone and no one is touching you. It's easy to pretend you're just dancing in front of your mirror. Stay out of the champagne rooms though. They touch a lot in there."

I'd heard about those rooms and had stayed clear the entire time I'd worked here. But I was a server. As a dancer, if someone paid to take me in there, didn't I have to go?

The question was bouncing around in my brain when the door to the dressing room slammed open. Inuyasha took a quick look around and when his eyes landed on me, they went from bronze to molten metal. The others squealed and ran while I was frozen in my seat, Sango stuck by me even as he stormed up and ripped me up from my seat. The only thing he said or did before dragging me out was grab a robe and throw it at me.

"Cover yourself."

In the bra and panty set I had worn there that night, cause no way in hell was I borrowing from anyone else, it was nearly my turn to go on but Inuyasha was taking us towards the exit. Koga stood near it, shaking with anger and...fear?

"I told you. I fucking warned you. She's not to go on the fucking stage. Ever. She can't even dance!"

"Look, I got requests, what was I supposed to do…"

"Tell them to fuck off, that's what! Jesus, what the hell do I pay you for?! When some asshole with a few bucks tells you what to do and you listen to them instead of me?"

Koga's head hung low but I didn't feel any pity in the slightest. "Sorry, Boss."

Inuyasha still had my hand in a death grip but he put his free one on Koga's shoulder. It was the kindest act I'd ever seen him do. "If anyone bothers you, you call me. Got it?"

I didn't get to see how Koga reacted, Inuyasha pulling us out into the night. He stopped, only to wrap his coat around me before shoving me into his car. The ride was silent until I could take it no longer. Anger was surging in me. Sure, he saved me but who asked him anyway?!

"I don't get you at all. You put me in a strip club to work but then get pissed because people want me to take off my clothes?"

"You're a server."

"IN A STRIP CLUB! What did you think was going to happen?!"

"I thought you'd do your fucking job!"

A dark laugh escaped my lips and Inuyasha turned to glare at me. "My fucking job? Interesting words coming from you. Considering you bought me to fuck you."

"I told you, I'm sorry. I didn't mean for that to …"

I wanted him to stop apologizing because it made the loss of my virginity a regret to him. I didn't regret it, I had enjoyed it until he opened his fat mouth! "It doesn't change a thing! Your apology doesn't change that night and it doesn't make my hymen magically grow back! And it doesn't change your complete lack of care for my feelings on the subject either!"

"Lack of care?!"

"I know I should be thankful...that things could be a lot worse…" I really tried not to, because I didn't want to give him my tears, but I couldn't stop them either. "But it's hard to feel anything but resentment when I went from being surrounded by angels all day to working for the devil."

I cut my sobs off after five escaped and Inuyasha listened to each one. It made me wonder if he got off on them until he spoke again. "The devil huh? That's how you see me?"

Nothing more was said even as we split off to our rooms. The devil going silently into his and I could honestly say for the first time that I hated someone. Cause I hated Inuyasha.

oOo

I half expected Inuyasha to show up at the club again the next day. But with him nowhere in sight two hours in, I considered him a no show and went about business as usual.

Sango was happy to see me, jumping up as soon as I entered the dressing room while everyone else seemed surprised to see me as well. "Oh man, last night was intense. You're okay, right?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Inuyasha is just...weird…"

"Weird? I thought it was hot as hell. I wish I had a boyfriend that protective. I was wondering why you were just a server all this time but now I get it…"

"Wait," I stopped her ramble with a gentle hand in her face, "that guy is not my boyfriend."

"Huh? Then who the hell is he? The way he dragged you out of here I thought for sure he made you quit…."

"What the hell do you mean, who is he? He's the boss!"

Sango's face and those eavesdropping around us twisted in confusion. "No, Koga's the boss."

I looked around, finding faces that agreed. "Wait...so when you said you auditioned for the boss…"

"Yeah, Koga. He made us all strip for him in his tiny little office. I was scared he'd do more but that was it."

I felt faint, my head getting light and my breaths feeling shallow. "But I thought… Inuyasha…."

"Kagome? Are you alright?"

Sango was holding me up off the floor and I gripped her shoulders tight. "Yeah, I just… need some air…"

If she didn't have her first set in five minutes, I was sure Sango would have gone with me. As it was, I wasn't sure I wanted the company anyway, following her finger to the back door of the dressing room.

It was freezing out, middle of January, and snow falling lightly from the black sky above. The cold helped my brain though, forcing the sticky feeling inside it to freeze so it would function.

So when Inuyasha said he was sorry...what had he said? He didn't mean to, that he lost control. Did he never intend to sleep with me? He was Koga's boss but not the boss of the other women? How did that make sense? It was if he had some kind of loyalty and he was actually showing it to me but I didn't understand or know how to take it.

Damn, now I hated him a little less.

"Hey."

So lost in thought, I missed the guy standing nearby, smoking. He took a step closer and I took a step back. It pushed me into the dark and him into the light. The bright red bulb at the end of his cigarette as he took a long drag and then tossed it. His features were sharp and dangerous looking, even with his long, wavy locks that softened his appearance. It was his eyes really, they were dull and lifeless and set on her.

"You're...Kagome right?" I really didn't like that he knew my name. "I'm a bit of a fan of yours. I'm Naraku."

He stuck out a hand but I refused to remove mine from their wrapped position around my chest. Naraku chuckled as he dropped the offer, digging in his pocket for something so I took another step back. A new cigarette and lighter in his hands, I still didn't relax, trying to slide towards the door. If he noticed, he said and did nothing as I grabbed a hold of the handle and pulled with all my might. But the door didn't budge.

"It's locked from the outside. Usually, the girls leave something to block the door but I guess they didn't tell you about that, did they?" he was grinning while my skin was trying to find a new home far from him. "Why don't you dance? You have a killer body and are so damn sexy. Does Inuyasha have a reason for not letting you? I must admit, it has me curious about your relationship to him."

"We don't have a relationship past employee and employer."

He shook his head, clucking his tongue at me. "Koga is your boss. Or...isn't he?" I fidgeted, looking for a way out. "Oh...I see… you belong to Inuyasha, don't you? Just what is your title then?"

My only choice was to walk around the building to the front, which I was about to do when the door popped open and Sango's head appeared. "Kagome? There you are! Sorry, I forgot to warn you about the lock…"

I was breezing past her, not worrying about the slip-up and Sango was glaring at Naraku. "If you ever want a change of pace, Kagome, let me know."

The door slammed heavily behind us and I couldn't be happier. Sango was still looking behind us as if Naraku had a key he forgot to mention. "You should stay away from that guy, Kagome. I'm not sure why he's even allowed near the building."

"Why do you say that?"

She looked back at me, her face pale. "Well...he snaked away a few of the girls that worked here a few years ago to work at his house or something. He promised them more pay and no stripping. But the last I heard he was sleeping with all of them and only some of them were willing."

I didn't bother hiding my disgust, nearly vomiting on the dark tile below us. Sango looked sick too. We were making our way back towards the front, Sango required to 'meet and greet' after her show and get tips. I was supposed to get tips too but I think they all went to Inuyasha or something. They could all go to the home for all I cared, I was loyal to the cause.

Naomi ran up to us as soon as we made it out of the hall and into the main floor. "Kagome, someone is here for you."

If it was Naraku again, I was just going to slug him and call over Koga. But it wasn't him. It was Mother Kaede.

And Naraku shows up, so you know there's going to be issues. Drama. Angsty drama. Weeeeeee...

[punkscowardschampions]

Jac & Jude

Jac: I know this is probably weird Jac: or just an unwelcome sight, my name in your inbox Jac: but if/when you have some time to spare, I'd like to talk, if you're willing Jude: whatever you heard I didn't do it Jac: We could workshop that but no, that's not what it is Jude: 🗨 about what then? Jac: Um, if I've gotta summarize it in a message Jac: the past 2-ish years? Jude: bit late to start 🗨 now but if you wanna not be 🤐 Jac: That's okay if you want it that way now but I can offer you explanations, if you want that too Jude: 10/10 opener Jac: Thanks Jac: though if you're saying it's as believable as your 'I didn't do it' I take some offence Jude: ⚽️ 🏀 🏈 ⚾️ 🥎 🏐 🏉 in my court is top for novelty value alone Jude: power might go to my head 🤯 Jac: get your kicks where you can, honestly Jude: 😜✌ Jac: You'll let me know then? Jude: [lowkey ages later] Jude: 🗨 if you still wanna Jac: Okay Jac: I appreciate it, hopefully you will too Jac: that's all I want really, so, obviously I'm the one that owes you whatever you need to hear but if you wanna give me an indication of where to start, it might be easier for us both Jude: idk where it even started Jac: for me, I'd say when I started to be friends with Savannah, at the start of transition year, and it really got real at the end of that year Jac: but maybe before I was slacking too, that's definitely possible Jude: it ain't a job Jac: no, I meant that it is work though, maintaining good relationships and being a decent sister, work that I wasn't putting in Jude: I've always been hard work for you, soz like Jac: It certainly wasn't your fault Jac: or what I was trying to allude to Jude: 🗨 or not goes both ways Jac: Okay, you can think that, you don't have a lot to suggest otherwise, I see that Jude: you talk to Jess cos he does your head in less than me, since forever Jac: In general, me and Jess have more in common than we do, I think Jac: but I didn't talk to him for the whole first year either, and I only did at all in the second because he did me a favour in a way I couldn't Jac: but I might have to go back to explain that in a less vague way Jude: go where you wanna, it's your 📖 Jude: I'm 👂 Jac: I'm not telling it for me Jac: but alright, I'll just do it Jac: so, Amelia was in love with me, it wasn't reciprocated, and she couldn't be my friend any longer, I lost her Jac: then what happened to Isabelle happened and I lost her Jac: and also Savannah at the same time Jac: and what happened to Is fucked me up, as well as the shit people were saying about it, about me around it Jac: it all got on top of me, I didn't cope with it, I took that out on a lot of people, you were one of them Jude: nowt I don't already know Jac: Right Jac: well I didn't know you knew that, so I felt I should tell you Jude: everyone knows about the 😍💖 Jude: I missed Sienna too & there's no way what happened to Izzy wouldn't fuck you up Jac: okay Jac: well it was rough, for a time there, and I didn't really have anyone to help me deal so I did some bad and stupid shit that didn't just affect me Jude: yeah Jac: and I'm sorry about that Jac: for however that affected you, at all Jude: alright Jac: and I only talked to Jesse because something really bad happened and he was there so I had no choice, really Jude: what was it? Jac: I don't wanna make you feel bad Jac: just to say how bad it was, like I'm being dramatic or whatever Jude: you can't just drop that something really bad happened & then not tell me ?? Jac: I had to have an abortion Jude: fuck Jac: I know that's a lot Jude: idk what to say Jac: You don't have to say anything Jude: ??! Jude: yeah I do, we can't just leave that there Jac: You don't have to like, try to make me feel better though Jac: I can talk more Jac: it was last christmas time Jac: and yeah Jac: it was the hardest thing I'll probably ever have to do Jude: Christmas Jac: yeah, great timing, right Jude: who was it? do I know him? Jac: no, it was some guy at some party, complete accident Jude: I'm never hooking up with anyone ever Jac: I wasn't being as careful as I could've been Jac: I was on the pill, I am, but I was sick so Jude: if it happened to you, it could definitely happen to me Jac: no, I wasn't being safe at all, I wasn't like me Jac: you wouldn't do that Jac: not like you shouldn't be careful yourself, of course, but I'm not trying to fear monger Jude: why? Jac: because I didn't feel well Jac: or like protecting myself from bad stuff Jac: but it was a wake-up call Jude: are you better now or what? Jac: I'm trying to be Jac: I wasn't trying at all back then Jac: but I am now, and part of that is reaching out, so you really can ask anything Jac: if you want to Jude: I don't think you should go if you're not Jac: I think University will be good for me Jac: I have stopped doing a lot of the things I was already, and I'm trying to do more things that I should again Jac: the fresh start, getting to do what I want to do, that's been keeping me going Jude: but it's really far away Jude: what if Jac: I don't want you to worry about me like that Jac: I'm not about living like that now Jac: if I had to stay here, I'm not saying I would go back, but leaving is a good thing Jude: you were though & you're not gonna have anyone to help you deal there, that's why you said it got bad before Jac: I still don't have friends here Jac: I have a better chance to make new ones when we're all new, you know Jac: but it was all the stuff that was too much that made it all happen Jude: it feels like a 🥉💡 Jac: Why? Jude: cos you said it was the only thing keeping you going so if it goes wrong Jac: but it's not going to go wrong Jac: you know academics have always been where I'm most comfortable Jude: yeah but Jac: I worked really hard for this, and I've always wanted it Jac: I can swap Universities, if I need to do that Jac: and I would, if things weren't working Jude: promise Jac: I promise Jac: I don't know how I'll reassure you on this, apart from getting there, and then checking in Jude: then do that Jac: I will Jude: okay Jac: I'm not going to go back there Jac: I want to be better, and that's half the battle, right Jude: true Jac: I have to get out of here Jac: you'll feel the same when your time comes too Jude: it's not bad for me here Jude: I get why you wanna leave & Jess has gotta for the ⭐dom but I'm all good Jac: you want to see the rest of the world too though Jac: not stay here forever Jude: I'm not gonna 👀 sod all from a lecture hall Jude: & a basic bitch gap year ain't no mood Jac: I'm gonna be in Edinburgh, a whole new city to explore and make home Jac: you have to go somewhere you wanna be Jac: and then you'll have good money to see enough of the world and not have to do it with pretentious gap year people slumming it in hostels Jude: I just don't know where I'd wanna be Jac: you still have time to figure that out Jude: but I won't have my pick like you Jude: not 🤓 enough Jac: you can still pick a city, lots of bigger places have lots of different Unis Jac: even if the Uni isn't like ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Jac: the place can be Jude: you're right, I've slummed it on loads of school trips & it's still been 🥇 Jac: and I'm not calling you stupid, you can get into wherever you wanna, with the work Jude: tah, don't be calling me thick 🤣 Jac: just so you can't call me out later, of course Jude: probs won't be going to Spain though I ain't getting any 🏆 in that class Jac: you usually get a year abroad if you want it Jac: still chance for some sun, sea and sand Jude: 😝 Jude: can't be tamed, the teacher'd be fuming to find out I'm in Barcelona loving the 🎨 Jac: you can fluff your first year Jac: get it out of your system 😏 Jude: yeah? Jude: I thought that was a rumour to 🎣 out dickheads Jac: I think if you totally tanked it, they might wanna get you gone Jac: but I don't know if they technically can Jude: watch me test it 😏 Jac: 🙄 Jac: 🤞 you change your mind in these interim years Jude: they'll be like oi you piss off & I'll be like nah mate!! 😜✌ Jac: 😂 Jac: good luck with that Jude: I've got this Jac: No doubt Jude: you can still have kids later if you want, can't you? Jac: It shouldn't have had any effect, like that Jac: I don't think losing a baby does, usually, unless it goes really badly and that didn't happen Jude: yeah, you're not Amelia's mum Jac: yeah, I'm clearly fertile Jac: so unless the karma is I'm not later Jude: thank god Jac: I don't know if I'll ever want to do it again Jude: idk if I want kids either but we might Jude: like ages from now Jac: yeah Jac: It was just a lot to go through Jude: did they knock you out to do it? Jude: that must've been scary Jac: I took the tablets Jac: did it at home Jude: here Jac: yeah Jude: shit Jac: I told Jess, so he stayed with me Jude: I'm glad Jude: he's the one I'd tell too Jac: Poor him Jude: I do tell him stuff, I'm sure he's gutted about it Jac: I just meant it's a bit rude of us to put it all on him Jac: I'm sure he isn't gutted Jude: yeah but he won't be around for it soon Jac: you can still talk to him Jude: nah, he'll be proper busy 🤠🎤🎵🎸 Jac: you can still blow his phone up Jac: he'll get back to you Jac: beside, you have friends too Jude: I can handle it, I've got mates, mum & dad & obvs me Jude: he's earned a break Jac: yeah Jac: no doubt he'll be grateful Jude: for sure Jac: 👍 Jude: I mean from me, not you Jac: no, I know what you mean Jac: I've put him through enough Jude: nah, I have Jude: you were really going through something Jac: Are you okay? Jude: yeah Jac: Good Jac: like you said, you can handle it Jac: not going to start demanding you tell me things Jude: it was just a weird time Jude: is Jac: yeah Jac: I know Jude: I didn't know what to do & like I always know about myself Jude: things ain't usually confusing Jac: I'm sorry Jac: for making shit harder for you, you didn't need that Jac: a lot of it was too painful to talk about Jac: like, I couldn't Jude: & you don't have to, not to make me feel better Jac: I wasn't intending to make you feel shit Jac: but I also didn't do anything to go out of my way to do the opposite either Jude: you made loads of people feel shit, I'm not special Jude: or probs even top 5 Jac: I did Jac: it was easier Jac: than questions and concern Jac: for me though Jac: not you lot Jude: you can't be selfless all the time Jude: everyone's a selfish dickhead when they're 💔 Jac: I didn't have to be quite so selfish Jac: that's a lie, I did feel like I had to at the time, or I wouldn't have done it Jac: but that doesn't excuse it as alright Jude: it wasn't alright Jude: but none of us are saying it is Jac: it means you get to react how you wanna now Jac: even if that ain't alright either Jude: bit late to 🥊 Jac: you could try it Jac: you needn't think I'm just gonna take it though Jude: I got my own room out of it, if I do a OTT 🚪 slam you'll get the point Jac: you get your own room regardless now Jude: & this time I can actually chuck your shit out without mum or dad having a go at me Jac: if you want Jude: it'll be gone soon as you have 👋 Jac: that's fine Jac: I have the things I need Jude: I won't ask you to help me start the wall mural as a bonding activity, you're alright Jac: would be counterproductive Jude: yeah you'd only fuck up my artistic vision Jac: naturally Jude: if Amelia weren't so in love with you she might've bothered to teach you how to 🖌🎨 instead of being convinced you were 10/10 as you were Jac: I'd hate to steal your thunder Jude: the competition'd be a right laugh Jude: I wouldn't mind it Jude: how you get better anyway Jac: It's one way Jac: I've always been peerless so I wouldn't know but Jude: 🙄😏 Jude: when Sav left, she gave you a 🏃 for your 💰 before that Jude: 🤓🥇🏆 Jac: True Jude: I wonder where she's going Jac: Bath, probably Jac: unless she changed her plans Jac: or got into Oxbridge Jude: that 1st bit don't sound like something she'd do Jude: maybe her Catholic school was top notch though Jac: I doubt her dad was going to risk sending to another shithole Jude: I don't get why he sent her away at all Jude: there's gonna be lads like that at parties a few hours from here just the same Jac: Yeah well, it was a convenient excuse for what he probably wanted to do anyhow Jac: and I doubt she was allowed to go to many parties after that, wherever she was Jude: he's a twat for not caring what Sav & Sienna want, I wouldn't let him tell me nowt Jac: you wouldn't have much choice Jude: 😬 Jac: clearly their mum didn't argue loads for them to stay so Jac: that's that Jude: yeah but he could've stayed closer & still had them live with him Jac: well there's no point pretending he isn't a twat, for the sake of this convo Jac: maybe he had a job offer, I don't know Jude: 🤷🏼 Jac: anyway Jude: ?? Jac: I don't know Jac: is there anything else you wanna know Jude: does it get any worse? Jac: no, that's the worst Jude: then you can tell me if there's anything else Jac: I mean, it wasn't so much what I was doing or did Jac: you know the rest, the drinking and partying and obviously the sex Jude: it was a bit hard to miss Jac: yeah Jac: it was what it was Jude: I don't blame you for wanting to go, you won't get a fresh start here after what all that was Jude: you were my sister before far as the 🗨 went now I'm yours Jac: well, I want to go anyway, always have Jac: I don't care what people think Jude: good job none of us are that bothered, with Jess blowing up an' all Jac: you can't be responsible for what people say about anyone but yourself Jude: I know Jude: dunno if the other two have their heads round that yet though Jac: well I'm sorry for what people might think or say about you because of me Jac: we're all going to have to make changes, because of Jess' lifestyle now Jude: there ain't no might about it, they do 💭 & 🗨 Jac: then I'm sorry Jude: don't bother being, it don't matter if you are & people have always 🗨 bollocks Jude: if it ain't you it's Jess or mum being a model, whatever else there is Jac: well I still am Jude: I can't change your 🧠 Jac: just because people talk, doesn't mean I have to give them more to talk about Jude: you won't be, you'll have pissed off to do your psychology degree, getting to just be you somewhere else Jude: like I'll get to just be me if I go far enough away too Jac: Yeah, that's generally why people do it Jude: even if Jess gets well famous in the next couple of years, still a common enough last name Jude: I should be able to do my own thing Jac: exactly Jac: private profiles, the whole deal, it's just what you'll have to do Jude: not gonna wish he fucks it, that'd be a bit rude Jac: Of course not Jac: it doesn't mean it won't be hard Jac: people already know you're related, you've been at gigs and stuff Jude: something else I can handle Jac: doesn't mean you can't feel a type of way about it Jude: it's what he wants to do Jac: Yeah Jac: but how do you feel about it? Jude: idk nowt's really happened yet Jude: it might get weird Jac: Yeah Jac: I get you Jude: I don't wanna be famous & especially not just for being his little sister Jac: yeah, I'd hate that as well Jac: people speculating 'round here is bad enough Jude: but maybe it'll help with my 🎨 Jude: not being a total unknown Jac: maybe Jac: but you wanna know you earnt recognition for your ability, not who you're related to Jude: all I know is if people start asking for 📷 I'm gonna have to look 11/10 every day Jac: 🙄😂 Jude: even for school! oh my god that'll be knackering Jude: I'll have to get up early Jude: tah for that, Jess Jac: people at school already have loads of embarrassing pictures Jac: at least you'll know where they've come from Jude: my mates won't do that, so yeah I'll know WHO they've come from Jac: you never know Jac: it changes people Jac: and not just the person it happens to Jude: what so I've gotta keep my 👀 on everyone? UGH Jac: I'm not trying to be dramatic Jac: but you hear about it Jac: people selling you out, for their own fame or 💶 Jude: you're not wrong, I'm just not chuffed to have to walk on 🥚 Jude: be a right laugh that will Jude: but whatever I ain't gonna whinge to you Jude: that'd be a bigger pisstake after everything you've just said Jac: can't say I blame you Jac: you can talk about whatever you want Jude: to loads of other people, not you Jac: if that's how you want it Jac: not because you think you can't Jude: it's how it is, you've got a lot on Jac: You can still talk to me Jac: regardless Jude: changing the habit of a lifetime of you telling me to NOT, that's like another fresh start Jude: so nah, not really Jac: that is what I'm trying to do Jude: & I'm here for you if you want but I don't need it from you Jude: like I don't need Jess to rush back from gigging how we said earlier Jac: Alright Jac: that's how we'll go forth then Jude: 👍 Jac: See you later then Jude: 👌✌

[shawnpetermuffins]

Dancing On My Own

Summary: We have a little best friends turned lovers thing going on here because why not.

Request: this lovely angst was requested by @it-isnt-in-myy-blood and I hope it's what you wanted.

Warnings: angst, with a fluff ending because again, why the hell not?

A/n: this ending sucks, I'm so sorry.

***

"Please come. It's my birthday party you have to," Brian begged over the phone.

"Bri, no. I can't."

"You mean you won't," he sighed. "If I told you Shawn was going would you come?"

Damn him for using my one and only weakness. "I hate you."

"I'll see you tonight." He hung up before I could change my mind.

Here's the thing. I hate parties. I hate bars. But I love Brian. And I love Shawn. We've been friends since I could remember. All of us, Brian, Shawn, Matt, Ian, and me. It's us. But I've always been the closest to Shawn, which is great, except I've also been in love with him since we were sixteen. And I didn't realize it until he had a girlfriend and it was too late to do anything about it. Now we're twenty he's been touring the world and I still love him, and he still doesn't know.

So you can imagine the immense, aching pain I felt in my chest when I saw him behind the bar talking to a girl in this dress that left very little to the imagination. (Definitely not something I could ever rock.) She was beautiful, I will give him that. Her hand is permanently on his bicep and she's laughing at everything. And she leans forward every time giving him an optimal view of her chest. As if being six foot two doesn't already give him that chance.

And yeah, I know it's stupid, but I gotta see it for myself.

"You look like you need a drink," Matt wrapped his arm around my shoulders and handed me his glass.

"What is it?" I brought the brim of the cup to my lips.

"Seven and seven."

I nodded and downed the rest of the drink, which was only about a quarter of the glass. I coughed in my elbow, hating the burn in my throat. "I need another drink. You want anything?"

He furrowed his brows and looked over at the bar where Shawn and that girl were somehow even closer than earlier. "I'll get it. What do you want?"

"Strongest thing you can get me."

He gave me a sad smile but nodded anyway and made his way across the floor.

Instinctively, my eyes wondered to Shawn who was now dancing - grinding, actually - with her. I glanced down at my feet, clad in heels and bright pink nail polish.

"Hey, you doing okay?" Brian showed up at my side a few minutes later.

"Yep."

"You're not. What's wrong?"

I sighed, "Brian, I know you wanted me here for your party, and I love you. But do you see what I see?" I gestured over to the newly found couple. "I can't watch that."

"Are you ever going to tell him?"

"Tell who what?" Matt found his way back to us and gave me a shot and a lime. "Tequila," he said when I looked at him confused. "Anything tequila is your drink tonight. "

I nodded, "sounds good." I swallowed the harsh liquor and quickly bit into the lime. I placed the lime in the glass and set it on the table next to us.

"Now are we gonna tell who what?"

"Is y/n ever going to tell Shawn that she's in love with him?"

As if on cue, we all looked over at them and I wish I hadn't because the sight was awful. Shawn's tongue was down her throat and his hands were on either side of her waist, and I thought I might throw up.

I'm in the corner, watching you kiss her. Oh oh oh. I'm right over here. Why can't you see me? Oh oh oh.

I'm not drunk enough for this, I though. And the guys must have thought the same thing because Matt handed me his still full glass and I drank it all in one gulp, wincing at whatever it was. I didn't care. I just needed to drink. Without another thought, I took Brian's beer and brought it to my lips. Now let's be clear. I don't drink often, I've never seen the point. Sure I'll have a glass of wine with dinner here and there, and sometimes a rum and coke if I'm out with the guys. But only ever one. However, in the last ten minutes I have had four different types of alcohol and I didn't plan on stopping there.

And I'm giving it my all, but I'm not the guy you're taking home... I keep dancing on my own.

I was just about to take my fourth shot when Shawn and his new accessory made their way over to us. He had lipstick smeared all over his neck and jaw. I was disgusted.

"My god, I hate tequila," I mumbled, but grabbed another glass. Shawn stopped me.

"How many have you had?" He asked over the music. Brian and Matt eyed me while I stood in front of my best friend, decently smashed, but somehow still not drunk enough.

"Well I can still see straight, so not enough." I gulped yet another glass and Shawn just watched me curiously.

"The cake's coming out," Brian placed a hand on the small of my back, probably to distract me from the girl clinging to Shawn's side.

I plastered on a fake smile and we all started singing "happy birthday" when we saw the lit up cake.

I just want to dance all night, and I'm all messed up. I'm so out of line, yeah.

"Happy birthday, to you!"

She claps with her arms still wrapped around his bicep and I roll my eyes. She's clearly never heard of personal space.

Some upbeat R&B song from the early 2000s blared through the speaker and she gasps. "Shawn, come dance with me!" She drags him back to the dance floor and I slump back into my seat, taking the last shot on the table.

Stilletos and broken bottles, I'm spinning around in circles. And I'm in the corner watching you kiss her, oh.

I can only watch for a minute before that familiar promise of tears stings my eyes and I have to rush out of the bar before I fully break down. The guys all call after me, trying to get me to stay, but if I was in there one more second I would surely break.

So far away, but still so near. The lights come up, the music dies, but you don't see me standing here. I just came to say goodbye.

I'm leaning against the wall of the building, tears blurring my vision, sobs wracking my entire body.

"Y/n?"

Shawn. I straighten up quickly and wipe at my eyes. "Oh, hi."

"Honey, what's wrong? Why'd you run out like that? Did something happen?"

I scoffed. "Surprised you noticed."

"Of course I noticed. I've been watching you all night. You don't seem like yourself."

I shook my head, "so you can watch even with your tongue down another girls throat?"

"What does Quin have to do with anything?" He threw his hands up.

"Just forget it. Forget I said anything. Go back inside. Go be with Quin."

"No. My best friend is crying and I'd like to know why. You think I haven't noticed that you've been checked out all night. Or the past few weeks, actually."

"I don't know what you want me to say." I shrugged.

"I want you to talk to me," he begged. "Why don't you talk to me anymore?"

"Because I'm in love with you!" I blurted out. "There. Are you happy? I'm in love with you and that's why I can't talk to you because you have a new girl on your arm every time we go out and it fucking hurts to see that, Shawn!"

He stopped and stared at me for a while. "Why wouldn't you tell me?"

"Why wouldn't I tell you? Because we've been friends since we were kids. I didn't want to jeopardize our friendship."

"How long have you felt this way?" He stepped closer to me.

"That doesn't matter."

"Yes it does."

"Fine," I crossed my arms over my chest. "Sixteen"

"So, you've kept this from me for four years. And you never thought, 'hey, you know, my best friend might want to know that I'm in love with him.'"

"You had a girlfriend! Then you were touring the world. And now you're sleeping with every girl you can get your hands on, but not me. Never me. Am I not good enough for you, Shawn?"

"Y/n, you are the only girl I have ever been able to keep in my life. You're too good for me, let's be completely fucking honest. I can't give you the attention you need and deserve. I'm never home."

"You think I don't know that? I know you're never home, which is why, even though I hate bars and parties, I still go out so that I can see you. I love you, Shawn. And I hate seeing you with other girls. But I know that we can't be more than friends and after this, we probably can't even be that, eh?"

He ran his hands through his hair, "let's do it."

"What?"

He reached for my hands, "look, I can't promise to be the greatest boyfriend in the world. But I can promise that I'll do everything in my power to make you happy. Because I do love you, so much. And if you're willing, then I want to do this. I want to be your boyfriend. You're my best friend, y/n."

"I don't want to lose you if we break up."

"Then we're best friends first. Boyfriend and girlfriend second. Nothing has to change other than the label."

"You sure you want this? I'm kind of a handful."

He chuckled, "I know, hon."

I hit his arm playfully, "Ass."

"I like yours."

My cheeks flushed pink and I wrapped my arms around his torso, burying my head in his chest. But he picked my face up by my chin.

"Hi," he said simply, a smile transforming his face.

"Hi."

I didn't have time to blink before I felt his lips on mine. And this - even just the slightest peck - was definitely worth the four year wait.

"I think I'm dreaming," I mumbled against his lips.

"Not dreaming, darling."

"Then I'm just really drunk."

"That you are. Let's get you home, eh?"

I nodded, "I should go tell the guys that we're leaving. Don't want them worrying about me."

Shawn looked behind me and rolled his eyes, "I think they already know."

I turned around to see Matt and Brian standing in the doorway. Matt quickly ducked back inside when I caught him. Brian was pulled in screaming, "FUCKING FINALLY!"

***

A/n: I hate the ending, actually.

[helloalycia]

worth the wait [two] // daisy johnson

summary: same as the first chapter – it was too long to post in one so this is the remainder of it!

part one | part three | part four | part five | part six | masterlist | wattpad

"What do you think?"

I raised an eyebrow as I poked my head inside the van, glancing around at the cramped space that had stupidly been turned into a living space. There was also, weirdly enough, a computer in the corner which made absolutely no sense.

"I think I have no idea what I'm looking at," I admitted, before looking to an excited Skye beside me. "What is this?"

She bit her lip to contain her grin as she patted the van's door proudly. "This is my new rig."

I almost laughed. "You're kidding."

Her smile lessened. "I'm not."

Now I definitely laughed. "Skye, c'mon, be serious. Whose van is this?"

Her smile disappeared as she clenched her jaw with annoyance. "It's mine. Sorry it isn't fancy enough for you, your majesty."

When I realised she was serious, I lost my smile and looked between the van and her. "Skye, where the hell did you get a van? You can't even drive!"

Clearly holding in her anger, she began to push past me and slide the doors shut. "He said you wouldn't get it," she mumbled to herself, but I heard.

"He?" I questioned with raised eyebrows. "Who the hell is he?"

"Miles," she snapped, stopping moving and looking to me. "Miles is the one who got me the van. He said it was a bad idea to show you and clearly he was right, Y/N. You took one look at it and laughed. He was right."

I smiled tightly, trying not to get worked up at the mention of Skye's new friend. She'd befriended this 'Miles' guy within the past few months and wouldn't stop meeting with him and his friends. He was in the grade above us, but just like her, he'd skip class and do God knows what.

Ever since she'd been hanging around them, she'd been standoffish and distant. She wouldn't contact me as much when she ran away, and she'd been skipping school more often than usual. They were clearly a bad influence on her, but she reassured me she was in control of her own life and knew what she was doing. Being the idiot I am, I fell for her pretty smile and convincing eyes, but this was getting too far now.

"No offence, Skye, but I wouldn't start listening to a guy who can't even make it to class on time," I said to her with a hint of annoyance. "Why do you need a van anyway?"

"Why not?" she countered with her arms crossed. "I thought you'd be happy that I'm finally taking responsibility. Growing up."

My expression softened. "I've never once said that you had to do either of those things."

"You don't need to say it," she mumbled, looking down at her shoes with a frown. "I know you think it. Everyone does."

I stepped forward, resting a hand on her shoulder and finding her eyes with mine. "Where is this coming from? Skye, I have never thought that. All I've ever wanted for you is to be safe and happy. I'm just worried."

She shrugged me off. "Well, now you don't need to be. I've got this."

"You're seventeen, you should be in school studying, not staying in a van," I said tiredly. "You've been missing so much. How are you gonna graduate?"

She avoided my eyes. "That's another thing... I've been thinking and, well, I don't think I want that."

I widened my eyes with disbelief. "What?"

Still avoiding my eyes, she continued, "I don't think I want to graduate."

I was too surprised to find words so quickly. I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

"How can you not want to graduate?!" I asked suddenly, finding my words. "It's what you do! It's what we all do!"

She met my eyes with apologetic ones. "It's what you do, Y/N. I don't want to be at a place that makes me feel like shit. I can't keep pretending I fit in when I don't."

"This isn't you," I told her sternly. "We were supposed to graduate together. You're not stupid, Skye. I can help you study. You can't just give up."

"I'm not," she said with certainty. "I finally know what I'm doing. That's all."

I squeezed my fists together to contain my frustration. "And what's that?"

"The Rising Tide–"

"For fuck's sake!" I cut her off, before hitting the van door with frustration.

"Miles has taught me a lot!" she defended. "They do a lot of good, Y/N! I just want to be apart of something bigger. Something that can help me help others. And something that can help me find my family. My real family."

I clenched my jaw, knowing I was too late in convincing her otherwise. Whatever Miles and the others had told her about their stupid hacking group had worked – she was dropping out of high school and there was nothing I could do to stop her.

"You're gonna be going to university and we both know I can't afford it," she said gently. "We couldn't stay together forever, Y/N. And my foster family definitely don't care what happens to me. I don't fit in anywhere."

I looked to her with glassy eyes. "You fit in with me. You always have."

She pursed her lips as she stayed quiet.

"I'm sorry I didn't make that clear enough," I added bitterly.

"That's not it and you know it," she muttered, shaking her head. "I have to do this. I have to figure myself out. Alone."

I felt stupid for letting her do everything she did leading up to this point. If I had just tried a little harder, maybe things could have been different.

"You're not alone though, are you?" I asked rhetorically. "You've got your new pals at the Rising Tide. It's their damn fault you're doing all this."

"They're not as bad as you think!"

"You've changed because of them!" I argued back. "They created a barrier between you and I. It's because of them that you've... that you've..."

"What?" she snapped, glaring at me. "That I'm finally thinking for myself?!"

I swallowed the lump in my throat and straightened up. "Forget it, just– forget it. I've got a midterm to study for."

She snickered harshly. "Of course. Don't want me slowing you down."

I stayed quiet and turned around to leave. I couldn't see past my anger as I left her with her stupid van. 

Of course, the two of us had been friends for a lot longer than that silly argument, so I was quick to realise how much I actually cared about her and her life, and wanted to apologise for how harsh and unsupportive I sounded.

The next day after school, I decided to head over to her foster family's place to hopefully talk to her. I'd had enough time to think about it and knew I was a lot more levelheaded now that I'd had some space.

I knocked on the front door and waited before an older blonde woman answered. I recognised her as Skye's foster mum, Sally.

"Hi, Mrs Collins," I greeted with a smile. "I'm looking for–”

"Mary doesn't live here anymore," Sally cut me off instantly, surprising me.

I had almost forgotten that Skye's foster family knew her as the name she was given by her orphanage – Mary Sue Poots.

"She doesn't?" I asked with confusion. "But I thought–"

"Goodbye, Miss Y/L/N," Sally interrupted, before slamming the door in my face.

I blinked with confusion before turning around and walking down the steps. It had been a while since I last visited Skye at home. In fact, she made sure I never visited her at home. I guess now I knew why. But then where the hell was she living?

As I walked around the neighbourhood trying to think about where Skye could be, I saw a familiar van parked up on the side of the street and put the pieces together.

Guiltily, I approached the van and sucked up a deep breath before knocking on the side. It didn't take long for the door to slide open and reveal Skye herself.

"Hey," I said quietly, noticing her surprised expression. "Can we talk?"

She licked her lips nervously and nodded, before moving to the side to let me in. I climbed inside and watched as she shut the door before settling on the seat in front of me. I looked around and realised the little details I hadn't noticed yesterday. The little things that made this place Skye's and nobody else's.

"I'd offer you a drink, but I don't have any," she joked to lighten the mood, and I couldn't help but crack a small smile.

I breathed out before meeting her eyes. "Skye, I'm really sorry about yesterday. I shouldn't have reacted like that. If I had known that this was your home, I–"

"You didn't know," she said, shaking her head with embarrassment. "I didn't want you to know. It's my fault."

I pursed my lips, watching as she looked away with pink cheeks. It hurt me to know that she was embarrassed when I didn't care about any of this, I just cared about her.

"I want you to know that I respect your decision to join the Rising Tide," I said gently, making her look up. "If it's what you want, you should go for it."

"It is," she said with certainty.

I chewed on the inside of my mouth before asking, "Is there no way you can finish high school though? Graduate with me?"

She shook her head. "I don't want to, Y/N."

"But that's the bare minimum," I pleaded. "Hacking isn't a lifestyle. You need to work, too, and I can promise you that most places won't look to hire a high school dropout."

She leaned back in her seat and shrugged nervously. "Miles isn't graduating either. And he's got some friends who haven't graduated. They're all doing fine."

I looked down and pinched the bridge of my nose to contain my frustration. I promised myself I wouldn't argue with her, but the mention of her other friends was like a trigger.

"What now?" she asked with annoyance, realising I was annoyed. "You clearly have something to say about them."

"It doesn't matter," I said, biting my tongue.

"Sure it doesn't," she played along.

"It doesn't," I agreed.

"Yeah, and the Hulk isn't bright green," she said sarcastically.

I looked up and glared at her. She stared back challengingly, practically daring me to speak. So, I did.

"Your new hacker friends are the reason you're making these choices," I told her straight. "They're the reason you're making a huge mistake. The reason you're dropping out. And for what? So you can hack like them?"

She rolled her eyes. "I know you look down on us, but we're more than that."

"Skye, I don't give a shit about them!" I shouted without meaning to. "I only care about you!"

"Then stop talking crap about my friends!" she returned angrily.

"Why do you care about them so much?!"

"They gave me a place to stay when I had nowhere! They made me feel like I belonged!"

I frowned, anger replacing with hurt. "I always offered you a place to stay. I only ever wanted you to be safe. You never needed to be different with me. You belonged. Always."

She swallowed hard and looked away from me ashamedly. "Well it doesn't matter anymore. I'm leaving."

I breathed out deeply. "School? Our town? Leaving what?"

"All of it," she said quietly. "I don't expect you to understand."

I looked down to my fumbling hands, a tear slipping from my eye. I had never felt so angry at someone before in my life. She was treating me like I was a stranger, as if I wasn't somebody who knew her inside out. She was treating me like she treated everyone else except her new friends. And I couldn't deal with it anymore.

"Fine," I said, before moving to open the door. I jumped out her van and didn't spare her a glance as I said, "Have fun with the rest of your life. Sorry I didn't care enough."

She didn't say anything and I didn't expect her to. With a broken heart and headache, I left and didn't bother turning back.

—

"What do you mean she's run away?"

"I'm sorry, Y/N," Mr Lock said apologetically. "Her foster family got the note this morning. They're doing what they can to find her. She always turns up, you know that."

I knew her family didn't care if she was gone or not, so I knew Skye definitely wouldn't be found. Unlike usual, Skye hadn't contacted me before leaving, so something told me she wouldn't be turning up.

Our argument was over a week ago and I hadn't seen her since. It had been eating away at me the way we'd left things, but I couldn't find it in myself to face her. I had no idea what to say anyway. And I wasn't sure when she was planning on leaving, so I didn't think it was important right now. Clearly, I was wrong.

"I just thought you should know," Mr Lock said with a nod. "The police will come by soon to get a statement from you."

As usual. Except this time, I actually had no idea where she was.

I nodded, my mouth going dry. "Thank you... can I go now?"

He nodded hesitantly. "Of course."

I left his office and headed straight outside behind the bleachers where nobody could hear or see me. The first thing I did was try to ring Skye, but there was no answer and no way to leave a voicemail. I tried several times, hoping she'd pick up, but she didn't. And that's when I remembered the burner phone.

Immediately pulling it out, I turned it on and saw the message from her appear on my screen. I was quick to open it, my heart racing like it did every time she ran away. I knew she wasn't coming back this time though.

Hey, Y/N. I know you probably hate me, but I felt like I owed you this. I said I was leaving and I have. I can't tell you where. And I'm not good at goodbyes. I've had too many of them and I couldn't bring myself to say it to you. I'm sorry I pushed you away. I never wanted to, but I guess some things are inevitable, huh? I've managed to do it all my life, this isn't any different. I'm just sorry if I hurt you in the process. Anyway, this is pretty long and I don't even know if you read it, but yeah. I'm sorry. I wish things could have been different.

The text ended there and I found myself rereading it to myself over and over, her words imprinted in my mind. I knew we'd argued and exchanged hurtful words, but I never in a million years thought she'd leave without saying goodbye. I thought I meant more to her than this. But no. I was just another foster family she ran away from. And I wasn't so sure I'd see her again.

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: [Morning after the snap incident] Janis: I can't fucking do this, I can't be around her Jimmy: come out Jimmy: I will too Janis: 🚬 break? Janis: someone's getting smacked otherwise Jimmy: & my teacher won't even hear me go so fuck it Jimmy: gimme a sec Janis: God bless that deaf bitch Janis: wish I was, soz Diego Jimmy: how shit is it? Jimmy: 1-100? Janis: can't be anything but 100 Jimmy: let's go then Jimmy: we don't need to be here Janis: I really thought she'd stay home Janis: how can she sit through this but not when they all were talking about me Jimmy: fuck knows Janis: this is a fucking joke Jimmy: least Mia ain't in your class Jimmy: her smug face is Jimmy: you'd knock her out Janis: do you think she put her onto this or Janis: how is she this stupid, Jesus Jimmy: I bet she weren't like 👎 Jimmy: Or OMG BABES NO!!😱😱 or whatever Janis: 🙄🙄 Janis: never mind whatever the fuck he actually said Janis: got the gist Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: it's bollocks Jimmy: that he said it & she fell for it Jimmy: what they're all saying now too Janis: it'd be alright if she just hated me this much Janis: whatever Janis: but it ain't alright she's this fucking thick and gonna just let herself be treated like this by him and everyone else laughing rn Jimmy: you should tell her Jimmy: nobody else is gonna Jimmy: it don't have to be now though, doubt he's going anywhere yet Janis: I tried Jimmy: alright Jimmy: like I said, fuck it then Jimmy: you did your bit Jimmy: let's go anywhere else Janis: there's nothing I can do Janis: if she wants to be this much of a fool then why should I care Jimmy: fuck knows what she wants Jimmy: but yeah, there's nowt else you can do Janis: Attention Janis: that's why she ain't crying now Jimmy: 🙄🙄 Jimmy: she's getting it Janis: yeah Janis: but us too Janis: who asked Jimmy: I'll knock him out again however much attention I get Jimmy: worth that Janis: if I have to see him again Janis: swear Jimmy: is he that much of an idiot? Jimmy: proper question Janis: definitely Janis: why else would he do all this Jimmy: then he'll get what he fucking gets Janis: yeah Janis: ugh fuck this Janis: I'm out Janis: do you have painkillers too by any chance Jimmy: 'course Jimmy: never know when my dad's gonna kick off, do I Janis: 😞 Janis: fuck all of this Janis: let's go Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: nobody's at mine til tonight Jimmy: we can go there for now Janis: yeah Janis: good Jimmy: 🐶💕 will sort you out Jimmy: you'll be alright Janis: just distract me okay Jimmy: I promise Jimmy: challenge accepted, okay Jimmy: always Janis: thanks Janis: seriously Janis: as if this wasn't shit enough Janis: I'm sorry Jimmy: it's nowt Jimmy: I love you Jimmy: I wanna do more Jimmy: leave it out with your sorry too Jimmy: you ain't done nowt wrong Janis: what can I say then Jimmy: just come with me Jimmy: it's alright Janis: okay Janis: I love you Jimmy: I'm outside your classroom Janis: ready to run Janis: undoubtedly calling the behaviour team rn Jimmy: I'm about ready to kick the door in & shit everyone up Jimmy: probably shouldn't but Janis: 😂 Janis: that'd be pretty funny Jimmy: then I'll do it Jimmy: owt to cheer you up, girl Janis: you're so cute Jimmy: [does the thing cos little shit] Jimmy: 💕 Janis: [run boys run 'cos not allowed to physically stop you leaving] Jimmy: [🚬 when they a safe distance away lol, he'd pass it straight to her cos gentlemanly] Janis: ['you're the best'] Jimmy: ['you'] Janis: [shakes head like nah] Janis: already feel better for not being in there Jimmy: ['you are'] Jimmy: 👍 Janis: hey Janis: come here Janis: [kisses please] Jimmy: [says ILY out loud after & then more kisses after that just because] Janis: ['I missed you'] Jimmy: [says it back because obvs same] Janis: why is everyone shit but you Jimmy: everyone's a dickhead Janis: [nods] Janis: why can't everyone be you Jimmy: only one of me, soz Jimmy: but I am all yours so Janis: yeah? Janis: say that again Jimmy: [says 'I'm just for you, baby. All yours.' in her ear] Janis: [makes an oh noise legit] Janis: I'm yours Jimmy: [cue even more kisses cos can't not when she's so hot like] Janis: you're Janis: a very good distraction Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt Jimmy: I accepted the challenge Janis: [look of love] Janis: I'm glad you did Jimmy: I weren't gonna say fuck you Janis: long as you do, say what you like Jimmy: [is giving her such a sexy look] Jimmy: come here Janis: [does] Jimmy: [a really hot make out sesh like imagine he's pushed her up against wherever & everything it's a mood] Janis: ['We should go'] Jimmy: [just nods cos what are words] Janis: can we walk yours from here? Jimmy: yeah Janis: first Janis: just Janis: more Jimmy: [does because no arguments here ever but especially right now] Janis: [being really extra 'cos the frustration in general rn] Jimmy: [likewise cos 1. challenge accepted and 2. living for it shamelessly like soz everything is shit but not for how hot this is] Janis: ['you're the only thing that matters'] Jimmy: ['you'] Janis: ['this, then...show me'] Jimmy: [yet again where are you lads cos there's no stopping him rn makes me lol] Janis: I wish this was all we ever had to do Janis: none of the other bullshit Jimmy: right now it is Janis: [holding his face to hers 'promise'] Jimmy: [says it back obvs & seals it with a really good kiss for emphasis] Janis: [taking his hand 'cos come on lads] Jimmy: [walking & handholding as per] Janis: never been gladder you live so close Jimmy: never been gladder that we're going to mine instead of yours Jimmy: never been glad actually Jimmy: until today Janis: seriously Janis: Ian ain't a 'come home for lunch' type is he Jimmy: [lols because so much no & shakes his head] Janis: 🙏🙌 Jimmy: we're lucky if he comes home for tea Jimmy: loads of time Janis: again, glad rn Janis: take as long as we can get Jimmy: you've got forever, remember Janis: [smiles] Janis: 'course 👻 boy Jimmy: I love you, alright Janis: I love you Janis: do you ever think like Janis: how this happened Jimmy: 'course Janis: it's fast Janis: isn't it Jimmy: I don't know Jimmy: shit happens fast Jimmy: it can change in a second Jimmy: just the one Jimmy: someone's there then they aren't or you've got nowt then you do Janis: yeah Janis: guess I'm not used to good shit happening that fast Janis: the bad stuff, all the time Jimmy: me too but Jimmy: again, I'm glad Jimmy: like you said Janis: yeah Janis: shouldn't question it Janis: just Janis: enjoy it Janis: right Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: & let nowt ruin it Jimmy: ever Janis: [nods] Janis: it's the only good thing right now Janis: I need to keep it Janis: and you Jimmy: me too Jimmy: I tried so fucking hard with my ex you know 'cause I thought it were Jimmy: but it weren't Jimmy: you're different Jimmy: this is Janis: not like you're alone in that, remotely Janis: can only end one of two ways, when you think about it Jimmy: I didn't wanna think 'bout that though Jimmy: the end Janis: who does Janis: enjoying it whilst it lasts, the moment, the journey, whatever Janis: I'm the weirdo because I don't let myself 'cos I can't think of anything but Jimmy: you are a MASSIVE weirdo, always saying it me Jimmy: but I get it, I think about that loads too & the start Jimmy: how it did, what I did, what I could've Janis: yeah Janis: just Janis: yeah Janis: least this didn't start too fucked up Jimmy: it was always good Jimmy: just Jimmy: I couldn't tell you Janis: it made it less complicated, I think Janis: least we had a label even if it was fake, like Jimmy: & it's not like you were gonna come into the CG order a coffee & I could Jimmy: or at school Janis: I get it, I'm an unapproachable bitch Jimmy: it's not you Jimmy: I don't do that Jimmy: I don't let myself with any of that shit Janis: girls come to you, yeah Janis: bit of a brag but I'll allow it Jimmy: [nudges her playfully] Jimmy: that weren't what I meant but alright yeah Janis: [nudges back] Janis: I know what you meant Jimmy: 'course you do Jimmy: it's the same for you Jimmy: it's on our terms or nowt Janis: exactly Janis: usually the latter Janis: easiest for me Jimmy: why that lad's crying Jimmy: that & I hurt him Janis: 😂 yeah you did Janis: & he has to fake date my sister Jimmy: at least it was fake for us both when we did it Jimmy: or she's more convincing than either of us were, I don't know Janis: nah Janis: I mean it's mutually beneficial 'cos she's getting the attention she wants Janis: but she clearly thinks he likes her too, whatever he's said to win her 'round Jimmy: nah she ain't getting the attention from you Jimmy: that's what she wants Jimmy: like you're gonna beg her not to do it Janis: 🙄 Janis: yeah 'cos I well loved him Janis: girl code, babes Jimmy: it ain't about him Janis: he'll be 💔 Jimmy: sure he'll be relieved Jimmy: easier to drop her when you don't come running in a bit Janis: honestly Janis: give it up already Janis: if you knew me at all Janis: how are we thinking this'll work Jimmy: I get it Jimmy: I'd do anything to make you pay attention to me if you weren't Janis: yeah right Janis: you just wanna fuck indie Janis: i told you no Jimmy: I mean it, I would Jimmy: & yeah obviously I do, she's really fit & decent to chat to Jimmy: older woman too so 💕 Janis: shut up Janis: you're a dickhead Jimmy: alright I'll just here me & my thoughts, not chatting just 😍😍😍 over her Janis: I'll just be leaving Jimmy: [pulls her close to him] Jimmy: you can't, you promised Janis: I can do whatever I want Jimmy: go on then Jimmy: do whatever you want Jimmy: right now Janis: ['yeah right' and drops his hand and keeps walking] Jimmy: [offers her a 🚬 which we know is a ploy to make her come back lol] Janis: [smoking in silence] Jimmy: don't be jealous Jimmy: I wanna fuck you too Janis: actually piss off Janis: not in the mood Jimmy: come on Jimmy: don't be a dickhead Janis: don't talk to me Jimmy: don't ignore me Jimmy: how about that Janis: why would I want to talk to you rn Jimmy: 1. 'cause I wasn't serious & you know that so 2. why wouldn't you Janis: I said, I ain't in the mood Janis: just leave it Jimmy: no Janis: You're so fucking annoying Jimmy: You are Janis: no I ain'r Jimmy: yeah you are Jimmy: what's this mood for? Janis: what you think Janis: you ain't stupid Jimmy: you ain't Jimmy: so stop Janis: I'm going for a run Jimmy: [stands in front of her & looks at her like stop it woman] Janis: [raises her eyebrows like are you serious] Jimmy: talk to me Jimmy: this is bollocks Janis: I've told you already Janis: got nothing else to say about it Jimmy: fuck's sake Jimmy: I didn't bin off school for you to ignore me Jimmy: tell me what's wrong Janis: Jesus, listen Janis: you've pissed me off Jimmy: you've pissed me off Jimmy: so what Janis: so I want some time to myself Jimmy: piss off then Janis: trying to Janis: [moves past him] Jimmy: [keeps walking like alright then] Janis: [going to the park obvs] Jimmy: [is going home obvs] Jimmy: at least take the dog with you if you're going Janis: Polite Janis: but I will Janis: she's probably desperate Jimmy: 👍 Janis: you bringing her or what Jimmy: I'm going home Jimmy: give a shit about her Janis: well no shit but she'll be there Janis: you want her walked, could at least drop her Jimmy: like I said, give a shit Jimmy: you're the one all 🐶💕 Janis: you know she needs walking or you wouldn't have said so just do it Jimmy: you're doing what you want & I'm doing what I want Jimmy: which don't include ferrying the dog about Jimmy: come and get her if you're bothered Jimmy: or don't Janis: fine Janis: I won't Janis: ain't my dog Jimmy: 👌 Janis: be stubborn and give yourself more work to do later Jimmy: I ain't giving myself nowt to do Janis: Cass then Janis: worse, whatever Jimmy: [shrugs] Janis: [🙄] Jimmy: I ain't meant to be here right now she ain't gonna miss what she weren't gonna have Janis: whatever, you'll be the one in the house with her when she's going mental Jimmy: yeah I will Jimmy: so you can leave it out Jimmy: not your dog or your problem Janis: I can have an opinion Jimmy: & I can ignore it Jimmy: loads of that going on Janis: sure you can Janis: and I'm not ignoring you Jimmy: [🙄] Janis: I listening to everything you had to say Janis: not my fault it weren't funny Jimmy: not my fault you brought her up Jimmy: or take everything really seriously Janis: yeah well you know what to do if you don't like it Jimmy: do I? Jimmy: what the fuck is that then Janis: you're doing it Jimmy: you're doing it Janis: I'm going for a run Jimmy: I got that the first time you said it Jimmy: & I get why Jimmy: even though it's bollocks Janis: how is it bollocks Jimmy: you're pissed off at me for nowt Jimmy: that's bollocks Janis: well sorry but that's how I feel Janis: what you want me to do about it Jimmy: I've told you Janis: talking isn't gonna help when you're just telling me I'm wrong Jimmy: It ain't my fault that you are Janis: see Janis: why Janis: why would I do this with you right now Jimmy: why would I wanna fuck someone else Jimmy: never mind your sister Jimmy: sort yourself out Janis: hold on Janis: you gave the reasons lemme scroll up Janis yeah obviously I do, she's really fit & decent to chat to older woman too so 💕 Janis: there you go, welcome Jimmy: & I've given you loads more reasons why I wouldn't Jimmy: why don't you trust me Janis: it ain't about trust Jimmy: why don't you believe me then Janis: what's to believe, you said what you said Jimmy: I've also said that I don't want anyone else & I fucking love you Jimmy: loads of times Janis: yeah Janis: they don't cancel each other out Jimmy: yeah they do Janis: I don't think so Jimmy: well what the fuck do you want me to do? Jimmy: I can't keep defending myself for something I ain't done & wouldn't Janis: I ain't asking you to Jimmy: this is such bollocks Jimmy: whatever Jimmy: go Janis: fine Jimmy: 👍 Janis: fuck off Jimmy: fuck you Janis: you Janis: you started it Jimmy: you did Jimmy: it ain't my fault everything's shit Jimmy: don't take it out on me Janis: yeah well you're meant to help Janis: not add to it Jimmy: you added to it Jimmy: just let it go Jimmy: it was a stupid thing to say, alright Jimmy: but like I said, you brought her up Janis: like I didn't know anyway Janis: you didn't have to say it Jimmy: it ain't even about her Jimmy: it's about you reckoning I would Jimmy: that there's something to be jealous of Jimmy: yeah, she's fit & not a total dickhead, but that don't mean owt Jimmy: loads of girls are Jimmy: I'm with you Jimmy: I want you Janis: Then go talk to them Jimmy: shut up Jimmy: I don't want to Jimmy: I wanna talk to you, you dickhead Janis: you haven't tried Janis: so go Jimmy: stop Jimmy: I've been with other girls, you know that Jimmy: there's nobody like you Jimmy: & I've never felt like this Janis: [is just looking at him like] Jimmy: [all the intense looks from him too like BELIEVE ME BITCH ILY] Janis: can we just Janis: forget it Jimmy: I don't know Jimmy: can you? Janis: alright, if I wanted to talk to a teacher I'd go back Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: I'm being serious Jimmy: are we gonna have to keep doing this or what? Janis: just don't say stupid shit again and we won't Jimmy: alright Jimmy: challenge accepted Janis: I'm being serious Jimmy: me too Jimmy: I didn't mean to kick all this off Jimmy: I say stupid shit sometimes Jimmy: but I'll try not to Janis: whatever, it's done with Jimmy: okay Janis: I don't wanna fuck you still though Janis: sorry Jimmy: then don't Janis: I can't Jimmy: so it's not done with Janis: it is Janis: just Jimmy: it isn't Jimmy: there's still a problem Janis: I just don't feel great about myself right now that's all Janis: that ain't all you is it Jimmy: no Janis: no what Jimmy: it's not me Jimmy: do you want me to beat the shit out of that lad again? Jimmy: 'cause I will Janis: no Janis: it's not gonna stop him doing what he wants Jimmy: I meant what I said earlier, owt to cheer you up Jimmy: anything for you ever Janis: you just can't fix this Janis: but it's nice that you care to try Jimmy: I can't fix anything Jimmy: escape, remember Jimmy: that's all there is Janis: yeah Janis: the foundation of all solid relationships I'm sure Jimmy: never seen one Jimmy: I'll let you know if I ever do Janis: 👍 Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: where are you going Jimmy: home Jimmy: unless you're gonna run around my garden we gotta part ways Janis: bye then Jimmy: yeah Janis: [skip 'cos nothing to say] Jimmy: ? Jimmy: what was that? Jimmy: too much of a queue Janis: yeah something like that Janis: don't worry 👍 Jimmy: don't be a dickhead Jimmy: you know you can go to the front Janis: wow, perks Jimmy: 👍 Janis: plenty overpriced coffee places in this town Jimmy: & you walked into mine so Jimmy: what is it? Janis: now I need a reason Janis: soz, didn't know I had to book in Jimmy: to walk in & straight yeah Jimmy: out* Jimmy: bollocks don't you have a reason Jimmy: go on Janis: you know I don't even drink coffee Janis: what you think Janis: I was there to see you, dickhead Jimmy: I know that Jimmy: & now you don't wanna Jimmy: so what's wrong? Janis: you're busy Jimmy: & Janis: and Janis: it's not that important, obviously Jimmy: whatever Jimmy: piss off again then Janis: don't talk to me like that Jimmy: at least I'm talking to you Jimmy: this is just bollocks Janis: to tell me to piss off? Janis: yeah no need Janis: message received loud and clear Jimmy: to tell you to stop Jimmy: this Janis: what have I done? Jimmy: what have I? Jimmy: why don't you wanna see me or chat to me Janis: you've got plenty of people to chat to Janis: you're fine Jimmy: shut up Jimmy: none of them are you Jimmy: I miss you, alright Janis: nah you don't Jimmy: yeah I do Janis: yeah right Janis: well I came to see you not the other way 'round Jimmy: It ain't my fault that you went for the world's longest run Jimmy: right past my house & away from me for ages Jimmy: just finished, did you? Janis: shut up Janis: that's just an excuse Janis: you're over 'chasing' me Janis: fine Jimmy: you shut up Jimmy: I waited for you Jimmy: you never showed Jimmy: if anyone's over this it's you Janis: well how was I supposed to know Janis: I'm not a mindreader Jimmy: nah, just my girlfriend Jimmy: why would I want you around? Jimmy: what the fuck Janis: you said you were going home Jimmy: you said you were going for a run Jimmy: so I was waiting for you at home Jimmy: weren't invited, was I? Janis: no Janis: whatever, this is all beside the point now Jimmy: for you, maybe Jimmy: I got your message loud & clear is the point Janis: no, yours Jimmy: what have I done other than let you go on a run? Janis: you tell me Janis: actually don't Janis: don't need to hear Jimmy: what the fuck are you on about? Janis: you're loving getting consoled, don't lie Jimmy: the dog's the only one missing you other than me Jimmy: so nah, I ain't Jimmy: she can piss off too Janis: yeah 'cos that's what I meant Jimmy: what then Jimmy: you gonna say I'm flirting with customers now Jimmy: 👴👵💕 Janis: don't take the piss out of me Jimmy: I ain't Jimmy: I'm asking Jimmy: what's your issue? Janis: how fast you're moving on Janis: that's my issue Jimmy: 1. didn't actually realise you'd dumped me, tah for letting me know Jimmy: 2. I ain't moved on to nowhere or nowt Jimmy: 3. fuck you Janis: I haven't but you're fine and I'm Jimmy: stop saying I'm fine Janis: saying what I saw Jimmy: soz for not crying into the lattes Jimmy: trying to keep my job Janis: stop taking the piss Janis: I'm trying to talk to you properly Jimmy: stop telling me I'm not being serious Jimmy: that's how I feel Jimmy: like shit Jimmy: but I'm working so I can't just Janis: don't say it like that's what I want to see either Janis: you don't have to fucking Janis: flirt with your coworkers though that isn't part of the job description Jimmy: sort yourself out Jimmy: I'll say it again & mean it as much if not more Janis: fuck off Janis: patronizing prick Jimmy: it ain't patronising to tell you that you're acting mental right now Jimmy: it's how it is Jimmy: I can't talk to someone I walk with now? Jimmy: since when's that been part of the deal Jimmy: work* Janis: there's talking then there's that Janis: I know the difference okay Jimmy: nah you don't alright Jimmy: she has a boyfriend she lives with & who dropped her in Jimmy: I have a girlfriend who's a massive dickhead but I love Janis: doesn't mean you can't fancy each other Janis: does it Jimmy: It means I fancy you Jimmy: more than anyone Janis: okay Jimmy: just come back Janis: I can't Janis: I feel stupid now Jimmy: please Jimmy: I can't do this without you Jimmy: any of it Janis: can you come outside Janis: just for a second Jimmy: I'm due a break Jimmy: you can have 10 minutes Janis: okay Janis: hold on then Jimmy: alright Janis: I don't think I'm far Jimmy: 👍 Janis: I'm sorry Jimmy: me too Jimmy: I really am Janis: you shouldn't have to be Janis: you didn't do anything Jimmy: I should've dragged you back with me Jimmy: or called Jimmy: or owt else so you know that I didn't want you to fucking go Janis: it's okay, I was telling you to leave me alone Janis: you didn't have much choice Jimmy: but you also told me not to let nowt ruin this Jimmy: I fucked up Jimmy: & I'm sorry Janis: I promised too Janis: so Janis: my fault Jimmy: yeah but like you said, I was supposed to make shit better not worse Jimmy: my fault Janis: you do Jimmy: ask yourself how you feel right now Jimmy: it ain't good Jimmy: so nah Janis: only because I kept myself away from you and I convinced myself of Janis: all kinds of shit that isn't true Janis: it wasn't you Jimmy: just take the apology Jimmy: I need you to Jimmy: I need you Janis: alright Janis: do you take mine too Jimmy: 'course Janis: okay good Janis: come out then Jimmy: [does] Janis: [reunited and it feels so good] Jimmy: [longest hug ever excuse him] Janis: ['I missed you so much'] Jimmy: [says he missed her too & loves her so much & just is not letting go and ugh] Janis: ['I love you, I'm sorry I'm so stupid'] Jimmy: [all the reassuring words & touches 'cause you're so not stupid babe we get it] Janis: ['don't dump me'] Jimmy: ['don't you dump me'] Janis: [shakes head, 'I would never, you'll have to dump me, sorry 'bout it'] Jimmy: [shakes own head & is just looking at her like] Janis: ['but not now, please'] Jimmy: ['not ever'] Janis: ['have to kill me then'] Jimmy: [looks at her like challenge accepted & gives her SUCH A Jimmy: KISS] Janis: ['I really fucking missed you' and more 'cos duh remember you only have 10 minutes lads] Jimmy: [if there was ever a time for the pulling her closer thing it's during this make out so] Janis: [all the ilys] Jimmy: [and all the I missed yous & need yous & sorrys too] Janis: ['can I see you properly after work?'] Jimmy: ['Yeah. But stay too, just for a bit. Just'] Janis: [nods, stroking her thumb over his bottom lip] Jimmy: [is 😍 but also a soft boy trying not to cry cos thank fuck everything is okay again] Janis: [little kisses all over his forehead, cheeks, nose etc] Janis: ['I'm really not gonna let it happen again, I swear'] Jimmy: [nods cos what are words but also I believe you bab] Janis: [hugging 'til he has to go] Jimmy: I don't want to Janis: I know Janis: make me a smoothie, I'm staying for a bit, remember Janis: just also not getting you sacked from this one Jimmy: 👌👍 Janis: [one last intense kiss 'cos you dramatic] Jimmy: [just giving it everything like its gonna be years before you can do it again & not hours] Jimmy: alright Jimmy: come on Janis: [handholding walking in bitch] Jimmy: [walks her to the blatantly best seat for being near him and squeezes her hand before letting go & leaving her there but all the looks as he makes this smoothie bitch] Janis: I forgot to say Janis: you look even better in this uniform, bt Janis: w Jimmy: yeah? Janis: mhmm Janis: [obvs looking back] Jimmy: did you dress up for me? Jimmy: 'cause you look Jimmy: [indecent looks rn excuse him other customers its not for you] Janis: [😳] Janis: obviously Janis: told you I was coming here to win you back Jimmy: its Jimmy: it would have worked Janis: would have? Janis: 💔 Jimmy: if you'd just come in & Jimmy: I don't know what your plan was Janis: 🤷 Janis: maybe I'll tell you Jimmy: [brings her the smoothie even though he's not a waitress lol & all the eye contact & lingering hand touch when] Janis: ['tah' 'cos what else can she even rn help] Jimmy: [says 'enjoy' in such a voice like how dare you boy] Janis: I take back what I didn't say Janis: you are flirting with the customers if that's how you're doing it Jimmy: [lols from where he is back at the counter oh boy working hard as per yeah] Janis: 😏 Janis: you're cute Jimmy: you're hot Jimmy: & I just Janis: focus, babe Jimmy: I am Jimmy: on you Jimmy: [sends her a fire sext cos any excuse for a throwback] Janis: this is how trouble starts Jimmy: I've told you before, I'll get in trouble for you Janis: I know Janis: but I've gotta be good for you right now Jimmy: you are Jimmy: you're the best Janis: you Janis: even if you are making me miss you more than I already did Janis: which was so much Jimmy: it just wasn't long enough Jimmy: we need more Jimmy: of everything Janis: yeah Janis: when are you working to, actually Jimmy: 3 more hours Janis: ugh Janis: well, could be worse Janis: lasted this long without actually dying Jimmy: & I'm already dead me Janis: they'd probably recommend a ☕ Janis: but I know the truth Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: you know what I need, girl Janis: are you planning on being this distracting the whole time? Jimmy: It ain't my fault if you're easily distracted Jimmy: [gives her A LOOK as if to prove it cos little shit] Janis: it's entirely your fault Janis: thank you Janis: own it Jimmy: you Jimmy: looking like that Jimmy: making me just want Janis: Jimmy Janis: you can't tease me for 3 whole hours Jimmy: don't challenge me Janis: I can't take it right now Janis: I just Jimmy: let's think of a plan Jimmy: there's gotta be a fire alarm we can set off or some shit Janis: 😂 Janis: better yet, I'll just start a real fire Jimmy: probably don't burn down my livelihood Jimmy: much as I wanna be with you right now Janis: spoilsport Janis: but fine, I'll sit here and drink my drink Janis: 😇 Jimmy: & think of a plan to get me off early Jimmy: I'm serious Janis: 🤔 me, on it Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: tah nerd Janis: shame all your grandparents are too far north to kill off Janis: 'less you can cry hardcore on command, and you know, bit of a rep to get Jimmy: & already 💀 Janis: your boss don't need to know that Janis: that's 4 funerals you can 'go' to, play your cards right Jimmy: an evil genius you Jimmy: why are we pissing about though let's just kill Ian Janis: two dickheads, one stone Janis: like the way you think, boy Jimmy: & there's my mum too Jimmy: add her to the fake funeral list Janis: oh yeah Janis: 'less she's gonna show up at some point, give the game away Jimmy: not here Janis: that works then Jimmy: like I said, add her to the list Janis: 👍 will do Janis: you aren't deathly allergic to anything they might have here, by any chance Jimmy: if I say I am that'd probably get me sacked Jimmy: health & safety gone mad, like Janis: ah true Janis: too risky Janis: just have to fake a medical emergency and put you as my contact Janis: bye mum and dad Jimmy: 👋 Jimmy: soz but not really Janis: lmao this is when I tell you I've got a life-threatening illness Janis: #trapped Jimmy: 👻 club Jimmy: first rule, you gotta be dead or dying so Janis: this is what they make lifetime movies about to scare suburban mums Jimmy: 😂 Janis: #goals always you Jimmy: 💕 Janis: also good smoothie Jimmy: won't tell you it's basically off the menu from here Jimmy: don't wanna 💔 Janis: 💔 my heart too Janis: don't feel special now Jimmy: baby Jimmy: it's still got secret ingredients Jimmy: don't need 🎻🎻 Janis: 😏 hmm Janis: might survive then Jimmy: you have to Jimmy: you've promised Janis: obvs I'm a well untrustworthy bitch though Jimmy: bit late to let me know that now but Jimmy: alright then Janis: like you didn't Jimmy: I trust you with all my heart, you know Janis: shh Janis: don't be so cute Jimmy: could be taking the piss Jimmy: what do you know, girl Janis: it's still cute Janis: and everything, obviously but we don't need to bang on about it Jimmy: 'course not Jimmy: everyone knows we're #goals Janis: sick of how #goals we are Jimmy: you are or the 🌍 is Janis: 🌍 Janis: never me, idiot Jimmy: good Janis: you know how much I love you don't you Jimmy: yeah but Jimmy: say it though Janis: Jimmy, I love you so much I feel like Janis: not loving you is impossible Jimmy: don't not love me Jimmy: ever Janis: I can't, I mean it Janis: but I don't wanna either Janis: it's just Jimmy: I get it Jimmy: I do Janis: it's a lot, right Jimmy: yeah but Jimmy: it's meant to be Jimmy: so that's good Jimmy: it means it's real Janis: it is Janis: that's good then Jimmy: if we're not scared we don't care enough Jimmy: that's what I reckon Jimmy: & if we don't feel like we're gonna 💀 then we're not 💕 enough Janis: I'm alright going with that too Janis: better than admitting we're actually mental or whatever Jimmy: we're that too Jimmy: massive fucking weirdos Janis: [lols from her table] Jimmy: [is heart eyes cos] Janis: should I go walk the dog to kill some time Jimmy: I don't want you to go but Jimmy: you should Janis: I'll come back Janis: promise Jimmy: okay Jimmy: [comes & gives her keys purely so he can touch her again when he does] Janis: [tries to give him a restrained goodbye kiss] Jimmy: [goes for it because he's not gonna get sacked just for that] Janis: 💕 Janis: now I get to see my real bae Jimmy: at least let me finish saying bye before you're thinking about her Jimmy: bit rude Janis: 😏 Janis: okay you can continue Jimmy: no, I can't Jimmy: not how I want Jimmy: so to be continued, baby Janis: 😍 Janis: alright, make it hard to move when I gotta walk out Janis: see how it is Jimmy: #goals Jimmy: as always Jimmy: but seriously Jimmy: I already miss you Janis: I miss you more, trust Janis: try not to lose your dog whilst I'm shamelessly distracted, like Jimmy: & I'll try not to get sacked Jimmy: again Janis: [tattoo insta] Janis: is she actually serious Jimmy: ? Janis: [sends it] Jimmy: shit Jimmy: why Janis: because she's that much of a fucking idiot Janis: because she wants as many shitty tattoos with shitty people as she can Janis: I Janis: Jesus! Jimmy: him too Jimmy: I know he's got some already but Jimmy: fucking hell Jimmy: where'd they even go to get it done Janis: I know my mum didn't do it, that's for sure Janis: probably made my brother 'cos who's believing she's close to 18 Jimmy: yeah exactly Jimmy: & he don't look like he is either Janis: more than her but yeah, probably not Janis: it's so stupid Janis: how long has it even been Jimmy: a week? Jimmy: I don't know Janis: actual joke Janis: 'cept they're taking it too far and no one but him is laughing Jimmy: 🙄 Jimmy: should've hit him harder Janis: I should Janis: for fuck sake Janis: so what, this is real now yeah, we're all just pretending Jimmy: where is he? let's go knock him out Janis: ha Janis: with my sister, not that he wants to be apparently Jimmy: at yours? Jimmy: easy then Janis: nah Janis: I'm at home Jimmy: bit rude of 'em not to be in smacking distance Janis: seriously Janis: she's gonna be in for it when she gets home though Janis: my big sister's here and she's fuming Jimmy: I can guess which one Jimmy: giving out those #mumvibes Janis: yeah, not your fave so you don't have to rush over Jimmy: she's still hot though Jimmy: let's not be hasty 'bout this Janis: funny 🖕 Janis: if you can calm my ma down you're welcome like Jimmy: I'd have a crack at it Jimmy: ain't got much experience though Jimmy: mine was Jimmy: never calm Janis: yeah Janis: she ain't really Janis: but not like this Jimmy: tell her at least she ain't married to Ian or never been Jimmy: comforting that Jimmy: for all of us Janis: ew Janis: enough incest flying 'round here Jimmy: is there? Janis: ugh, right Janis: could've got away with that Janis: someone would say it eventually Janis: my sister, the mum one, married our cousin Janis: I know Jimmy: fuck Jimmy: you're not taking the piss right now, are you? Janis: sadly not Janis: 😑 Jimmy: how did that come about? Janis: that's what we'd like to know Janis: well everyone is #overit now 'cos how this family does Jimmy: & they're like married & shit? Janis: yeah, kids and everything Janis: it's fucked Jimmy: not to be that dickhead but Jimmy: is that allowed Janis: apparently so Janis: who knew Janis: had a quick google of that beforehand I guess lads Jimmy: well shit me Jimmy: you really are living that 🍀 dream Jimmy: I'm #shook rich girl Janis: shut up Janis: it ain't me it's just my family Janis: I told you they're fucked, hardly the worst Jimmy: do you want me to come over, for real? Jimmy: for you Jimmy: not them Janis: yeah Janis: I'm trying to talk to her but Janis: you can imagine how well that's going Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: I'll be there in a bit Jimmy: soon as I can Jimmy: thank fuck I opened at work this morning Janis: 👍 Janis: better if you miss the hysterics Janis: would if I could but you know Jimmy: owt else I can do? Jimmy: it's so fucking Jimmy: caught me unawares but Janis: 'less you've got a laser you're probably good Jimmy: I'm just pleased to see you, babe Jimmy: nowt like that in my pocket soz Janis: 😂 Janis: you're such a dork Janis: thanks Jimmy: mr 😎 me Jimmy: you've got the wrong lad again Janis: come over anyways, yeah Jimmy: alright Jimmy: but I ain't getting a tattoo done Jimmy: don't like you that much Janis: don't be that 😎 Janis: only one it couple at a time, please Jimmy: it would help me remember your name though Jimmy: sort it out, Grace, you've really fucked me over Janis: you ain't putting my name next to barrys Janis: not 2nd best ever, tah Jimmy: ❌ his out first Jimmy: you know you're 🥇 Janis: that'll look like maybe you thought that was my name Janis: like whoops, take 2 Jimmy: it would suit you Jimmy: really pretty Janis: 😏 Janis: so elegant Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: spare my blushes when I call his name out too so Jimmy: tah Janis: hmm Janis: so accomodating me Jimmy: must be why I miss you so much right now Janis: yeah? Jimmy: unless you can think of any other reasons Janis: if anyone's out here listing what's so missable about me, it should be you Jimmy: maybe when I get there Jimmy: if you're Jimmy: nice to me Janis: you know you're the only person I'm nice to Janis: you should feel special, baby Janis: you are Jimmy: you Jimmy: nobody even pays me Janis: if that was your subtle way of asking Janis: rude, at this point Janis: tbh Jimmy: I ain't asking you Jimmy: but like if you fam really wanna be #extra Janis: don't worry Janis: all eyes on princess grace rn Janis: you won't be getting a look in Jimmy: 👍 Janis: not with me though, obviously Jimmy: if that was your subtle way of binning me off Jimmy: try again Janis: I meant the opposite Janis: can have my full attention if you're distracting enough Jimmy: when aren't I? Jimmy: not even a challenge Janis: was only a maybe earlier Jimmy: come on Jimmy: you know how much I want you Janis: Good Janis: 'cos before this drama I was so bored without you Janis: and now I just need to Janis: not think, for a bit Jimmy: easy Jimmy: I'll make you not think for as long as you need Janis: I love you, yeah Jimmy: you'll love me more in a bit Jimmy: I promise Janis: I know Janis: can't lie and say you've ever let me down there Jimmy: ain't about to start now Jimmy: you might think about me though Jimmy: that alright? Janis: I always think about you so Janis: just gimme something really good to remember later Jimmy: you're still be feeling it later Jimmy: least I can do Janis: I need that so bad right now Janis: always Janis: I wanna feel you all the time Jimmy: me too Jimmy: not just saying it 'cause you need it Janis: good Janis: don't Janis: you have to want it just as bad always or there's no point Jimmy: like I said, you know how much Jimmy: I really want you Janis: yeah but Janis: I like reminding Jimmy: you can have 'em all Jimmy: physically Janis: just no tattoos yeah Jimmy: 💔💔 Janis: 😏 so gutted I know Janis: just aren't that #goals Jimmy: 🎻🎻 gonna make me 😢 babe Janis: you wish Janis: if you like pain that much I can think of plenty other ways to get you there Jimmy: go on Jimmy: I'll be there soon Janis: 😂 Janis: maybe I'll tell you when you are then Janis: if you're nice Jimmy: the deal is, you're nice to me & I'm nice to you Jimmy: that's it Jimmy: remember Jimmy: so it's up to you, girl Janis: I'm always nice Janis: what are you talking about Jimmy: best behavior 😇 you Jimmy: for now Janis: what about later Jimmy: 😈 please Janis: easy Janis: gimme a challenge Jimmy: patience Jimmy: there it is Janis: wow Janis: call me out Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: I like it Jimmy: you Janis: I like you too Janis: too much to worry about being hard to get or some stupid shit Jimmy: nowt turns me on more than how much you want me Jimmy: that's too much Janis: handy Janis: 'cos I ain't tryna hide it Janis: I wanna turn you on Jimmy: just not right now yeah Jimmy: I'm surrounded by people Janis: 😇 still Jimmy: 👌 Janis: even if it is hard work Jimmy: I get it Janis: nah Janis: always 😈 you Janis: leading me astray Jimmy: you're the #confirmed bad influence, babe Janis: only if you wanna side with Ian Janis: dog 💕 me Janis: she can be trusted Jimmy: you're definitely a bad influence on her Janis: 💔 Janis: how could you Jimmy: how could you Jimmy: one job Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Janis: fine Janis: imma ignore you and focus solely on my dog training career Janis: bye Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Janis: you asked for this, boy Janis: questioning my dedication Jimmy: what if I asked for the opposite Jimmy: what are you gonna do? Janis: you didn't though so Janis: speak up Jimmy: alright Jimmy: I'm saying it Jimmy: gimme all your attention like you said Janis: okay Janis: could've thrown in a please but Janis: easily persuaded Jimmy: baby please Janis: 🤤 Janis: now you're just spoiling me Jimmy: I want to Jimmy: I miss you Jimmy: it's taking ages to get there Janis: don't it always Janis: amazed any potential suitors make it to the door Jimmy: that don't make me used to it Janis: I know you remember how best to pass the time Jimmy: tell me Jimmy: I wanna spoil you, I told you Janis: make a video for me yeah Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: alright Janis: I can watch it later Jimmy: you better if I'm putting all this 🥇 effort in Janis: promise Janis: I wanna watch it whilst you fuck me Jimmy: You're 💀 me Jimmy: you're so Janis: too much? Jimmy: perfect Janis: you Jimmy: you Janis: I can't even think about how good you must look right now Janis: but it's all I can think about Jimmy: [sends her some selfies cos nice like that] Janis: be here now Janis: like right now Jimmy: send me a 🐎 or car, rich girl Jimmy: even one of them cows would do Janis: they are fans after last time so Janis: probably make that happen Jimmy: they would be if they could see me now Janis: 😍 Janis: I can always take you to see 'em later Janis: feeling like putting on a show for more than me and the bus Janis: don't let the #fame go to your head, babe Jimmy: who could refuse an offer like that, babe Jimmy: especially 'cause you know I ain't letting anyone on this bus know owt Jimmy: it's all for you Jimmy: 🥇 Janis: just Janis: say that again Jimmy: what Jimmy: that it's for you? Jimmy: you know it is Janis: you know I like hearing it though Jimmy: you can hear everything when I get there Jimmy: I know you like that too Janis: you just know everything I like Jimmy: so far Jimmy: forever's loads of time Janis: you reckon I'll get bored? Jimmy: might do Jimmy: only so many times we can call Pete to spice things up for us Janis: 😏 Janis: know you two think you're special but Janis: whole world of barista boys out there Jimmy: good job 'cause Barry'll be 💀 can't rely on him either Janis: 😂 Janis: why it's so sensible going for an older man Janis: more sensible going with 👻 boy though Jimmy: I ain't giving you 🏆 for falling for me Jimmy: just good sense that Janis: hmm Janis: 👌 Janis: feels it Jimmy: bring more enthusiasm when you show me in Janis: make me Janis: you here though Jimmy: I will Janis: promises promises Jimmy: just telling you what's about to happen Jimmy: preparation if owt Jimmy: want you to be ready for me Janis: stop being hot when I'm trying to come get you Jimmy: this is nowt Jimmy: & why you gotta be ready Janis: I ain't ready Janis: wasn't Janis: for how much I want you Janis: all the time Jimmy: now who's being hot Janis: I mean it though Janis: I didn't know I could need anyone this bad Jimmy: me either Jimmy: you know I mean that too yeah Janis: yeah Janis: it is a bit different though Janis: you're special, I mean that too Janis: even if I thought someone was fit or whatever I'd go there and it'd just be Jimmy: you didn't feel nowt at all? Janis: like Janis: obviously physically, it's happening, even if it's not incredible it's still you know Janis: but I couldn't get out of my head Janis: idk Jimmy: why me then Janis: don't say it like that Janis: not like I planned it Janis: I thought it'd be same as usually, too Jimmy: I don't mean it like Jimmy: it's just Jimmy: you're so Jimmy: with me Janis: I dunno Janis: maybe 'cos we both knew it was fake from the off Janis: 'cos everyone else is pretending too Janis: but you have to pretend you ain't and work out if the other person still is so if it turns real for you, you know to hide it if it ain't for them Janis: it's a minefield init Janis: it took that away Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: I get it Jimmy: before I came here I felt like the only one of my mates being real about owt Jimmy: & Ian ain't been since who knows when Janis: yeah, exactly Janis: everyone bullshits about everything Janis: all the time Janis: why was I gonna opt-in for some more when I could do it better alone Jimmy: I'm so happy I met you Jimmy: that literally sounds fake but Janis: gonna say, don't start now Janis: sounds dead lick arse but Janis: you're just, real, as well Janis: I knew that at least before I knew you Jimmy: there's none of that bollocks with you Jimmy: it's why I could ask you do this Jimmy: not why I wanted to though Janis: why didn't you like Janis: freak out more Janis: when you knew I wanted it for real Jimmy: I'd done all that when I reckoned you didn't Janis: yeah? Jimmy: talked myself out of loads of shit then & before Jimmy: you reckon that was the first thing your sister had left at the CG? Jimmy: it was just the first time I went for chatting with you Jimmy: *some of her shit Janis: oh Gracie, how shaming Janis: still Janis: cheers for that, babe Jimmy: not forgiven for near throwing up on me but Jimmy: she did alright there Janis: you're such a baby 😂 Janis: but I like you anyways Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: you love me & I'm 😎💪 Janis: yeah, I do Jimmy: come here & show me Janis: how could I refuse an offer like that, babe Jimmy: you can't Janis: I don't wanna Janis: I wanna show you everything Jimmy: I need to see it Jimmy: & feel it Jimmy: every sense actually Janis: fuck Janis: yeah everything being you sounds pretty fucking good right now Jimmy: it'll be better than good Janis: I know Janis: what I don't know is how we're getting back to my room when I'm already so Jimmy: they're all inside Jimmy: let's be outside Jimmy: for a bit Janis: not just a pretty face Janis: but Janis: [comes into view and runs at 'cos no chill with this hello] Jimmy: [let's give them a sec to be extra af] Janis: [going hard with showing 'cos what a frustrating day in general and then you've got yourself all worked up oh lads] Jimmy: [likewise cos he's got one job which is to distract her & he REALLY wants to do it at this point] Janis: ['I've been thinking about you, about this, all day'] Jimmy: [when you're trying to be like yeah me too but it's basically just a moan though cos] Janis: [just nods 'cos same babe and gets them somewhere vaguely out of view/earshot of the house if you please] Jimmy: [very appreciated, takes this moment to send her the video as promised before he gets too distracted to remember] Janis: [sits in his lap 'cos always but facing him and not away] Janis: ['I want you to watch me watch you'] Jimmy: [his turn to just nod but the LOOK he'd give her though bye] Janis: ['feel me, Jimmy'] Janis: you said I had to be ready so see how well I did for you Jimmy: [says fuck softly & with feeling cos damn okay] Janis: how do you look that good Janis: better than I even imagined, God Jimmy: it's how you make me feel Jimmy: I was thinking about you & I just Janis: [in his neck, kissing and sucking and biting etc 'cos making her need a moment] Janis: what exactly where you thinking about me Jimmy: you were with me Jimmy: I always want you to be Janis: that's why you're eyes are closed Janis: you're pretending it's me Jimmy: yeah Janis: shit Janis: that's so Jimmy: you're so Jimmy: it made me just Janis: just like Janis: this Janis: [copying the video] Jimmy: [making all the noises he couldn't make then cos he had to be more stealth] Janis: you can have your eyes open this time too Janis: I'm here, baby Jimmy: [the eye contact though bitch] Janis: You feel even better than you look Janis: it's making me feel even more Jimmy: it's Janis: ['all for you'] Jimmy: [has to kiss her very intensely cos dying] Janis: the way you bite your lip Janis: [does it but on his not her own] Jimmy: [thank god she got them out of earshot cos so about that] Janis: [😏] Janis: your lips are very biteable, I agree Janis: [rubbing them softly with her thumb for that moment] Jimmy: you're nowt like you were in my head Jimmy: you never are Jimmy: you're so fucking Jimmy: I can't capture it Janis: but you've got me Janis: so you can keep on trying Janis: and I can keep being better and better Jimmy: challenge accepted, yeah Jimmy: but there's no better for you Jimmy: you're already the best, I mean that Janis: [pushes her thumb into his mouth a little with a smile, running it over his teeth and pushing it a bit further every time and just being hot af in general] Janis: the best for you Janis: you need me, don't you Jimmy: [sucking and biting on her thumb as and when & generally also being hot af about it while also saying how much he needs her] Janis: [moaning 'cos 'you look so fucking pretty when you do that' and sucking on his fingers to taste herself] Jimmy: [being loud af as usual and saying her name a lot] Janis: I wanted to make you cum with the video but Janis: it's really fucking hard to be this close and not just Janis: have you inside me Jimmy: we can do whatever you want Jimmy: I'm supposed to be spoiling you Janis: you are Janis: just fuck me, like you wanted to when you were touching yourself Janis: do it exactly how you were thinking Jimmy: like I've wanted to all day Jimmy: been thinking about all day Janis: how do you even get any work done Janis: when all you really wanna do is Jimmy: there's no second goes by when I don't wanna fuck you Jimmy: unless I am Janis: me either Janis: everything else seems like an even bigger waste of time now Janis: school, other people Janis: I just want this Jimmy: it's just white noise Jimmy: you're the only thing with sound & colour Janis: [the NOISE bitch] Janis: baby Jimmy: I really fucking love you Janis: I know Janis: and I feel it too Janis: You're all that matter to me Jimmy: like I said, I don't see anything or feel it Jimmy: nowt registers Jimmy: there's just you Janis: ['I- I better make sure it feels as perfect as it possibly can then'] Jimmy: ['you are baby' in such a voice with such a look] Janis: oh God Janis: you make me feel Janis: so fucking Jimmy: I'm not gonna stop until you cum all over me Jimmy: it's all I could think about before Janis: it is not going to take long, keep fucking me like that Janis: let me give you everything you want Jimmy: take everything you want too Janis: I am Janis: I don't even know how I can you're so Jimmy: you're unbelievable Jimmy: that's how Janis: ['you' but you can imagine how it's coming out rn] Jimmy: [says it back & likewise oh you two] Janis: so I'm gonna cum all over your cock but where are you cumming for me, baby Jimmy: where do you want me Jimmy: you said you've been thinking about this all day too Janis: well Janis: when I thought about it Janis: you bend me over and finish on my ass Jimmy: [just a noise of absolute agreement coming from him rn] Janis: ['you want that too, yeah?'] Jimmy: [says yeah & we know how it sounds & that he's gonna keep saying it a few more times with some swearing thrown in for emphasis of course] Janis: [goes harder as a result 'cos feeling how hard he's feeling it too] Janis: fuck baby Janis: you really want it Janis: make me cum for you Janis: you've got me so close, Jimmy Jimmy: [goes harder himself as a result of her being the hottest ever & OMG the intense eye contact goodbye] Janis: [all the I love yous rn] Jimmy: [& all the kisses cos overwhelmed] Janis: [imma let you finish lads] Janis: that was Janis: so good Janis: you're so good Jimmy: you are Janis: I missed you Janis: [cuddles] Jimmy: I missed you so much Janis: you should stay forever Janis: like this# Jimmy: that's the deal, baby Janis: good Janis: probably laws about keeping sex slaves Jimmy: [little lol] Janis: [feeling them dimples] Janis: you're so cute Janis: but hot too Janis: not fair Jimmy: that's why I'm #goals Jimmy: but it's only fair Jimmy: you're cuter & hotter Janis: [makes psh noise] Jimmy: take the compliment Janis: I'm not not Janis: I'm just disagreeing that you're not cuter and hotter Janis: that's all Jimmy: shut up Jimmy: you're so beautiful, alright Jimmy: there's no comparison Jimmy: & so sexy it's like Jimmy: indescribable Janis: you make me feel it Jimmy: you were before me Jimmy: school's shit but not that shit that I'll just draw anything Jimmy: anyone Janis: [😳] Jimmy: [all the kisses] Janis: you thought I was hot Jimmy: I ain't legally blind or owt Jimmy: you are Jimmy: but yeah I thought about you Janis: I thought about you too Janis: could pretend it was new boy shine though Jimmy: likewise Jimmy: all you paddy's are new to me Janis: exactly Janis: good cover, give us that Jimmy: 🥇 always us Janis: I'm just glad you asked me Janis: not some other random Jimmy: I weren't gonna ask anyone else Jimmy: I didn't need to ask you Jimmy: I just Janis: wanted to fuck me Janis: understandable 😏 Jimmy: I didn't know that was gonna happen, bighead Jimmy: but I'd get to kiss you at least Janis: what happened to taking the compliment? Janis: so fickle, you Janis: [but kiss, duh] Jimmy: that only works when I'm saying you're fuckable Janis: you saying I ain't now Janis: mean Jimmy: I'm saying I didn't know if you were gonna be when we signed up to fake date Jimmy: could've been a constant nightmare you Jimmy: instead of only sometimes Jimmy: [but kisses] Janis: please Janis: you knew I was 😎 Jimmy: alright yeah Janis: 😂 only Janis: *joking Janis: your crush wasn't that blatant actually Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: It weren't no crush Jimmy: I just didn't reckon you were an utter dickhead Jimmy: I've been wrong before though, it's alright Jimmy: I ain't 💔 Janis: [smacks him like oi but also loling] Jimmy: [makes a big song and dance like ow but also loling & then more kisses cos he loves it when she lols or smiles] Janis: whatever anyway Janis: you looooooove me Jimmy: I really love you Janis: how much Janis: right now Jimmy: [kisses her like this much] Janis: not bad Janis: gonna best myself, obviously Janis: [goes in harder] Jimmy: [a noise into her mouth] Janis: [smirky af] Janis: you wanna stay out here for a while longer Jimmy: do you? Janis: [nods and is hiding in his neck] Janis: I can't deal with them and this any more than I already have Jimmy: you wanna go? Janis: maybe we can go out Janis: or just Janis: not be here Janis: we can walk though, I don't have a plan Jimmy: shower with me first Jimmy: I've made a right mess of you Jimmy: & I'll sneak you in Janis: oh yeah Janis: [imagine lmao] Janis: that would be good right about now Jimmy: come on then Janis: come this way, can use the one in here and not be disturbed Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: [handholding & off they go]

[punkscowardschampions]

Jimmy & Janis

Jimmy: What it is, right, your twin left her coat at CG earlier & it's my neck if it's not back in her hands by me next shift Jimmy: pass it on Janis: Hmm Janis: Are you sure you've got the right person here? Jimmy: Grace Cavante is your sister isn't she? One of Janis: Unfortunately Janis: No doubt she'd rather you gave it to her yourself and that feeling is mutual, like Janis: Get a clue, lad Janis: couldn't be less obvious 'less she left her knickers Jimmy: Stop your chatting, a sec Jimmy: nowt's mutual that's why I'm asking you to get it, not her Jimmy: The resale's nowt either, I had a look Janis: You're in my inbox? Janis: Knew you were lost Janis: Poor Gracie, first you pie her then you call her cheap, gutted Jimmy: I've been round your family tree about 4 times Jimmy: Can't call myself lost Jimmy: You gonna grab this or nah? Janis: Unlucky, but I ain't gonna cry for you Janis: Wrong twin, again like Janis: What's in it for me? Already told me I can't flog it Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: well I'd shout you a muffin but if you're anything like her, I'll be the one eating it when you don't & I'm watching my figure meself Jimmy: guess the pleasure of my company works if you are? Janis: Tell you ain't from 'round here Janis: No 🍀 Janis: Nothing like her Jimmy: sounds more like my luck's finally in Jimmy: got enough stalkers Jimmy: more than I've done shifts Jimmy: what you want then, other twin? Janis: Not that I doubt how special you are Janis: I completely do, by the way Janis: You get to thinking how you can make me having to fucking regale every detail of this frankly riveting convo to my sister worthwhile and I'll get to walking, yeah? Jimmy: You wound me, girl 💔💔💔💔 Jimmy: I sought you out, whereas she's been in my inbox unread since my moving in date, that'd do for starters Janis: If the situation's a dire as you reckon, you'll have plenty consolation, boy Janis: Welcome Janis: State, honestly Jimmy: You're my consolation if you do me this delivery Jimmy: feeding me to the wolves in lipstick if you don't, basically Jimmy: 'ave it on your conscience if you want, mate Janis: Fucking Hell, if I start atoning for all her cringe or offering myself up as 'consolation' to every lad she makes a tit out of herself in front of I'll never get anything done Janis: Ugh, alright, brains, do your job for you as well, shall I? Just put your mate's number on her to-go 'stead of yours, yeah? Jimmy: alright but how many of 'em are coming to you direct for help, I'm making myself look as much of a tit here, aren't I? Jimmy: brutal you Jimmy: newbies don't have mates to throw under buses Janis: Well, don't be fooled by how available I seem Janis: phone never stops, like Jimmy: I'll find another way then Jimmy: if you stop by for coffee I'll misspell your name like we never chatted, don't worry Janis: Barista bants, how cute Janis: Whatever, it's on my route, I can get it tomorrow AM Jimmy: what you prefer, Janet or Janice? Let me know Janis: 😑 Janis: If you want my sister to ride you, keep on taking the piss, she'll love that, like Jimmy: if you want me to be nice to you, keep using your sister for that A+ excuse Jimmy: 'cause nah, there's nowt more appealing than her getting on her bike Janis: Ha, fuck off, you're the one with a tips jar and manager to keep happy, dickhead Janis: I'm not saying she's not fussy, I'm just saying it might take me several cups of coffee to give you enough 3rd degree burns for her to be #overit Jimmy: funny Jimmy: & im just saying I'd rather give me ex a bell & have her do her worst ruining my life long distance Janis: Worth a shot then, isn't it? Janis: Just try and be less Janis: this Janis: she might reckon you're a changed man Jimmy: is it gonna change your sister's mind about me if I do? Jimmy: 'cause her mates have homewrecker written all over 'em Janis: It was a poor choice of friendship tat, yeah but they ain't the brightest, bless Janis: idk, probably help if the girl was real, mate Jimmy: she is real but shes also real far away Jimmy: & really hates me Jimmy: that's mutual unlike the attraction your little twin is harboring 💔 Janis: 💔 Janis: fuck someone here then, ain't gotta be all 💕 just look enough like it that they write you off their hit lists, yeah Jimmy: proper romantic you Jimmy: I'll go back to the drawing board if its all the same Jimmy: don't need another lass falling for me, do I? Janis: 🙄 Janis: If I had such an easy out, I'd use it Janis: fucking blood ties, such bullshit, along with romance but there we go Jimmy: Easy? yeah alright, Juliet Janis: Not saying you've gotta off yourself with the poor bitch, steady on, though peak 💘 so it is Janis: You're either a 😻 magnet or you ain't, can't have it both ways Jimmy: I just wanna be left alone Jimmy: shouldn't be a lot to ask but until I master leprechaun for fuck off, it apparently is Janis: Preaching to the choir...nah, fuck that, preaching to the big man himself Janis: You work it out, you've got my details now you fucking stalker so hmu then and not before k Jimmy: you know the saying, get stalked enough, become fucked off enough by it to become the stalker Jimmy: or summat Janis: Tragic Janis: No doubt you coulda been something, kid Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: still could Jimmy: if you help me Janis: I don't know how to make a latte, soz Jimmy: not a requirement of dating me, and yeah, my boss is gutted Janis: you what? Jimmy: go out with me Jimmy: you said yourself it don't have to be a love story Janis: um yeah but you should both at least be somewhat into it, ideal world Janis: know you already called me out as the romantic here but Jimmy: nah, you're what I need Jimmy: I won't get tempted Jimmy: keep it easy, like you also said Janis: 🖕 Janis: Like I said, show me how it's worth my time and I will Jimmy: your sister would hate it Jimmy: not like I'm asking you to marry me, you look enough like her that'd be like asking myself to honeymoon in Vietnam Janis: You're a cunt, also, obviously not well-traveled Janis: say what you like Janis: it would be amusing to piss her off and I'm always up for finding new ways Jimmy: so you in? Jimmy: 3 date minimum Janis: You mean I actually have to spend time with you? Jimmy: as long as people think you are, do what you want Janis: Fill your boots Janis: but don't just be saying I let you finger me on your lunch break, like, that isn't working on anyone, least of all my sister and her stupid mates Jimmy: come get your sister's coat and we'll make the magic happen Jimmy: coupley pics and #s will work Jimmy: all they do is sip & scroll Janis: How magical can you really be, then? 😏 Janis: Fuck it, worth it just to piss her grafting you down the drain Jimmy: I'll fake rock your world, Jasmine Janis: Sure 👌 Make me forget my name half as many times as you have and you'll have fucked enough brain cells out to make me a thick Northern twat, clearly Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: hope you're a better actress than you are sweet talker, love Janis: That ain't the one, fucking hell Janis: pick a better petname if we ain't taking time to remember Jimmy: let me know what you want me to call you Jimmy: Baby, right? I bet you're one of them girls Janis: 😒 Hilarious Janis: My daddy issues are pretty non-existent, soz to report Jimmy: what then? Jimmy: Can't call you Juliet if you aren't ride or die for me, darling Janis: I'm remember your unfortunate accent now Janis: it's probably best you don't speak Jimmy: strong, silent type Jimmy: Alright Jimmy: 👍 Janis: It's your fantasy, kid Janis: Big yourself up however you gotta Jimmy: fantasy? nah Jimmy: necessity Janis: You've not gotta warn me Janis: Not swooning over this chat Jimmy: 💔 Janis: We're all gutted Janis: push that down and smile for the 'gram Jimmy: 😁 Janis: That's the spirit Jimmy: I know yours is more 😏 Jimmy: control yourself if you can, Jenna Janis: Make no promises to control myself so Janis: 👊 behave or deal Jimmy: make one or its off Jimmy: your sister & his mates break enough of my boundaries Janis: If the problem is they're swinging for you, I'm gonna go right ahead and victim blame Jimmy: probably keep that off the 'gram, girl Janis: We laying down ground rules here and now, yeah? Jimmy: you got something else on? Janis: It's the Easter hols Janis: so no Janis: fuck all Jimmy: then may as well Janis: Alright Janis: No posting without getting the other's go ahead first Jimmy: done Jimmy: same goes for agreeing to go somewhere/do something as the power couple we're pretending to be Janis: 'Course Jimmy: & if you tell your sister summat let me know too 'cause she loves questioning me over her coffee Janis: Ha Janis: I do my level best to avoid her but easy Jimmy: you're not gonna brag about what a good boyfriend I am 💔 Janis: We'll have to work out how good you are first, like Jimmy: good enough that I'm off limits your sister & her mates Jimmy: no more no less Janis: Can do that Jimmy: don't fall in love with me for real, can you do that? Janis: 😏 Are you for real? Janis: Ego to go with the accent, is it Jimmy: just checking you're not like your sister for real Jimmy: could be protesting too much for all I know Janis: And this could just be a really bad come on for all I know Janis: we'll have to trust on this one thing, deal? Jimmy: Yeah Janis: Sorted Janis: Make me sound good, as I will be for you Jimmy: how good? Jimmy: nobody knows my dating history, what's yours? Janis: Likewise Janis: all you gotta do is make it realistic enough that people stop asking if I'm a dyke Jimmy: Easy Jimmy: Are you a take it slow girl or hook up on date 1 type? Janis: Won't be getting that graphic on the 'gram, leave it out Jimmy: But it won't stay on the 'gram, will it? Jimmy: People chat Jimmy: what reputation do you want? Janis: Probably better to not be a slag init Jimmy: but don't be keeping me waiting too long if you don't wanna sound gay Janis: alright, irresistable Janis: 2nd date, like Jimmy: 👍 Janis: I ain't, by the way Jimmy: Don't matter Janis: Does Janis: Who needs the pressure of being a beard? This ain't what this is, got it Jimmy: It'd be less pressure, probably Jimmy: you'd be better at faking it Janis: Sorry to disappoint you and all the girls 😒 Jimmy: if its the only time you're gonna, I'll cope Janis: Naturally Janis: Aim to please Jimmy: save it for the 'gram, Judith Janis: Reckon I'm being nice rn? Janis: Poor boy 💔 Jimmy: nice matters less than gay Jimmy: Don't wanna be your mate Janis: Good thing too, aiming to please here, keep up Janis: just saying, starting to doubt how 😍 they are now Jimmy: come see for yourself Jimmy: I'm working as we speak Janis: 😏 Wow so hot Jimmy: it could be if you're ready to kick this off Janis: Why not? Janis: Sooner we get it done sooner we'll see results Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: Laters, babes Jimmy: Cute Janis: That's why you're with me Jimmy: I'm not yet Janis: You're gonna be salty 'cos I won't ride you in your hipster hangout today? 😂 Jimmy: I'm getting paid to be here, you're the one hanging out Janis: I'm picking up the bitch's coat, piss off Jimmy: You could do that when we close Jimmy: You're coming to see me Janis: You do this much? Janis: Suspiciously good at it Jimmy: Which bit? Janis: The bit where you fake a relationship Janis: Good tactic to get bare girls, like or what Jimmy: You're my first 💕 Jimmy: don't let it go to your head, Josephine Janis: as much as that'd get 'em throwing out the #goals Janis: secret's safe with me, boy Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: don't have to go to these lengths up north Jimmy: girls just get if you're interested or nah Janis: 💔 it's a shithole, mate Janis: didn't you get told before leaving t'mines Jimmy: must've had too much coal in my ears or summat Janis: Don't know what you got 'til it's gone Janis: interested and interesting bitches included, obvs Jimmy: not only a pretty face you Jimmy: got it going on in your head too Jimmy: lucky me Jimmy: 😍😍😍😍 Janis: Yeah yeah Janis: Better take back what you said 'bout the leprechauns now you're coming up 🍀&🌹 Jimmy: if you save the humble for the #s I'll think about it Janis: Never been accused of being humble Janis: I guess the gay or nay is more pressing Jimmy: never checked a mirror or nowt, neither? Janis: 'Course, gotta spot myself at the gym, ain't I Jimmy: you can agree you're pretty then Jimmy: not an ugly duckling story either Janis: What's it matter, like Jimmy: im not fake dating one of them girls Jimmy: hates herself but still takes selfies Janis: that's another rule? i'll be thinking on my next then Jimmy: Can't prop up your self esteem Janis: Don't worry 'bout me, fake worry or otherwise ain't necessary Jimmy: I won't Jimmy: all worried out Jimmy: fake & real Janis: 🎻 Jimmy: customer service deserves a pity orchestra Jimmy: alright for you, rich girl Janis: I'll hire one out for date three if you earn it Janis: so 💸 Jimmy: just gimme the money Jimmy: if this was a naff teen rom com, I'd charge per date Janis: If I was richer, older and lonelier, you mean Janis: and you were desperate enough to be a rent boy Janis: you'd actually have to put out though so let's not Jimmy: only if I wanted top money Jimmy: the in it for the chit chat option would be more than I make at CG Janis: Then I hope to fuck you're a better fuck than you are bringing it with the chat, darling, no one is paying for this Jimmy: I'm not trying to impress you Jimmy: pay me and I'll be charming Janis: I'm not trying to pay Janis: Not that hard up, but tah Jimmy: don't complain about what you get then Janis: You ain't telling me what I can and can't do, babe Jimmy: I'm telling you I'm not here to listen to you whinge, babe Jimmy: Get a real boyfriend for that Janis: Have you tried talking to any of my sister's mates Janis: I really think it'll solve this whole thing Jimmy: I talk to 'em every shift Janis: That's not real Janis: that's wage slave robotics Jimmy: neither is this Janis: Whatever, do this at them then Janis: However fit you are, it ain't worth all this Janis: though, probably had worse, hm Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: bad boy baristas are this year's...whatever last year's fad was Jimmy: whatever I say that's brutal I'm playing hard to get Jimmy: 🎻 Janis: 🤢 Ick Janis: last year's fad was the clap so like, careful Jimmy: I repeat, you're what I need Jimmy: nothing else has worked Janis: 😍 Janis: I said yes, didn't I Janis: it'll be sorted Jimmy: are you on your way? Jimmy: 'cause it won't be 'til then Janis: Keen Janis: Yeah, though, gimme 10 Jimmy: try and look like someone capable of getting my attention Janis: I'm not giving myself a shit fringe for you Janis: get some taste Jimmy: you don't know my tastes, Joanne Janis: I can guess Janis: and be right Jimmy: go for it Jimmy: try Janis: any bitch described in any indie song ever Janis: not like other girls 'cept like all the other girls at the shitty pub/gig drinking pints 'cos you'll think it's dead cool, like her tongue piercing and real leather jacket Jimmy: thats racist Jimmy: just 'cause I know all the lyrics to Wonderwall Janis: 😂 Janis: like glass, boy Jimmy: I hope you're better at pretending to know what I like Janis: I know I ain't wrong but you can have the automatic upgrade for free Jimmy: Funny Janis: What, now I'm TOO confident? Jimmy: Nah, too obvious Janis: Err, me or your lack of taste? Jimmy: you Janis: How Janis: Fucking cheek Jimmy: You've pulled the first cliche you could out of your arse Jimmy: is how Janis: I'm sooooo sorry Janis: sure she seemed really special and unique at the time Jimmy: I'm sorry that you're just like your sister Janis: Now who's chatting out their arse Jimmy: still you Jimmy: she don't know me either but she reckons she knows my tastes too Janis: and you don't know me, you barely know the bits of her she wants you to, like Jimmy: I'm not trying to even fake know you Janis: Mutual, hence idc what you fuck Janis: and it was a joke, fucking hell boy Jimmy: funny you Jimmy: like I said Janis: So you keep saying Janis: go do some work, i'm just killing time on the bus Jimmy: I'm working harder than you Jimmy: this chat is a slog without all the coffee I'm slinging between the lines Janis: Do one then? Save it for the 'gram, rule no.1 Jimmy: 👋 Janis: 🖕 Jimmy: 💕 Janis: what do you do that isn't shit coffee there Jimmy: drinks or food? Janis: Drinks Jimmy: shitter tea, tasteless milkshakes & minging smoothies Janis: 🙄 Joy Janis: if you can make the smoothie at least healthy as well as minging, do that Jimmy: I can make it taste alright if you keep that off the 'gram Janis: That's big talk, babe Jimmy: secret menus aren't just for starbucks Jimmy: I'm here all day I have to make some shit edible for myself Janis: Fair Janis: I'm willing to be impressed by the smoothie skillz at least Jimmy: Challenge accepted Janis: I'll be brutally honest, idc if you are bae Jimmy: calling me bae is more brutal Jimmy: hate that Janis: 😂 awh bae Jimmy: leave off, Jill Janis: hot and cold, you Jimmy: 💔 Janis: tell me 'bout it Janis: planning our fake breakup already Jimmy: Are you? Janis: that's the fun bit, right? Jimmy: make me look better than my ex did and it'll be a start Janis: i'll break your heart Janis: that's the reputation i'll take Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: steady Janis: 🤷 Janis: i want what i want boy Jimmy: you think you're having my heart? how many dates we going on? Janis: work fast Janis: faster than i'm letting you Jimmy: up yourself you Janis: rich 😏 Jimmy: yeah you are, don't rub it in, girl Janis: I ain't though Janis: like you said, her coat's shit Jimmy: means she's got shit taste not a lack of funds Janis: You can't be rich with 10 kids Janis: trust Jimmy: you could Jimmy: could be a princess for all I know Janis: 😂 what kind of deep cover is this Janis: living in this hole Janis: going to that school, sure Jimmy: #humble Janis: funny Janis: you wish Jimmy: Why? Jimmy: I don't care what you are, do I Janis: 💸 and clout would be an undeniable bonus, regardless Jimmy: I told you, I wanna be left alone, clout is the opposite of that Jimmy: & I don't need your money, girl Janis: Okay so you can't be bought, get you Jimmy: that's not what we're doing here Janis: I know Janis: Serious Janis: you're just easy to take the piss outta Jimmy: piss off Janis: I'll turn around now, like Jimmy: go on then Jimmy: I'm not having the threat of you walking hanging over me head Janis: So serious Janis: Not a princess with a driver, there's no changing the bus route on the rest of this lot now Janis: no matter how moody you get Jimmy: I've got a kid sister I ain't babysitting you too Jimmy: Be serious Janis: Yeah yeah Jimmy: Or call it off Janis: Nah Jimmy: It's not a yeah or nah question Jimmy: it's me saying don't half arse fake dating me Janis: I ain't going to Janis: like you said, this ain't real, and ain't how it's gonna be but can't prove that 'til I get there Jimmy: 👌 Janis: That ain't a response either Janis: I ain't the only one with something to prove Jimmy: Show your face & I will Janis: Try not to look too disappointed Janis: don't doubt some of your fangirls will be watching Jimmy: How many times do you want me to tell you you're pretty when nobody's listening? Janis: Shut up Janis: That ain't what I meant Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: See? Don't start Janis: 😍 only dickhead Jimmy: calm down, dickhead Jimmy: I've got this Janis: First time, you admitted as much Jimmy: Faking it, yeah Jimmy: I've done it for real, that's harder Janis: You reckon Jimmy: I don't care what you think so yeah Jimmy: As long as it looks good it don't matter if it is Janis: That's same as the real thing let's not lie Jimmy: Nah Janis: Agree to disagree, darling Jimmy: Disagree and tell you to shut your face, Jodie Janis: Save it for your ex, Romeo Janis: 💘 such a romantic Jimmy: If I was, she wouldn't be an ex, would she? Janis: Giving you benefit of doubt Janis: LDR never works, you're a 15 year old boy Janis: got like what, 13 more before you find the one, isn't it? Jimmy: what makes you think long distance is what ex-ed her? Jimmy: I never said that Janis: Guess not Jimmy: You don't have to fake knowledge about me Jimmy: nobody's asking who came before Janis: You don't know girls if you think that Janis: undoubtly scoping their profiles as we speak Jimmy: don't doubt they have but they won't find owt Janis: not gutted for 'em Jimmy: only yourself Jimmy: you'll have to keep faking knowing everything Janis: suits me fine, boy Janis: the truth don't interest me none Jimmy: spoken like a decent liar Janis: you know it Janis: truly your lucky day Jimmy: 😍 Janis: Ready? Jimmy: If you are Janis: Fuck it Janis: Why not Jimmy: see, romance ain't dead 💕 Jimmy: how could I refuse? Janis: in it for the smoothie Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: got time to spit in it still Janis: Don't you dare Janis: Will actually fuck you up Jimmy: Get used to it, you're gonna have to kiss me Janis: Disgusting Jimmy: Sweet talking again Jimmy: Jeez, June, steady on Janis: You're the one bringing up necking when I've not even got in the door Jimmy: Are you ready or aren't you? Janis: 'Course I am Jimmy: then I can talk about it, can't I? Jimmy: it's too late for a no kissing rule Janis: If that's how you deal with bricking it Jimmy: piss off Janis: Too late now, babe Jimmy: it's not Janis: ? Jimmy: we don't have to do this if you're shitting yourself Janis: bitch, please Jimmy: I'm not gonna be your bitch, babe Janis: Not the pet name you want then? Jimmy: 🖕 Janis: Have plenty of time to think on it when you're swooning 😉 Jimmy: It's so funny that you believe you'll able to think on anything Janis: 😏 Mhmm Janis: catch me mentally writing my shopping list to pass the time during Jimmy: You aren't even a good liar in private Jimmy: We're doomed Janis: Shut up Janis: Not seen such a romance since Kate and Leo Jimmy: 🎻 doomed, mate Janis: you wanna go down with the ship so bad Janis: drama 👑 Jimmy: I want you to put your riches where your big mouth is Jimmy: Stop your chatting and come on Janis: Keen as Janis: I'm nearly there, stop pining, it's embarrassing Jimmy: You're such a dickhead Jimmy: Maybe I should just date your sister Janis: Go on Janis: I ain't gonna save you from the literal slag pile of exes, you ain't deserve it Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: you don't deserve me Jimmy: well snide you Janis: You love it Jimmy: not having my 💘 Joan, I told you Janis: i don't want it Janis: just gonna 💔 it and bounce Jimmy: 😂 Janis: k i'm coming in guard your 💘 and 👀 'cos i look 🔥 Jimmy: I'll judge that Janis: you forgot what we're doing here or what Jimmy: If we're dating you gotta bring it as my girlfriend Jimmy: so nah Janis: 🙄 Janis: 'cos you look so fit in your stupid uniform 👌 Jimmy: We're meant to be improving your rep not trashing mine Jimmy: & yeah I do 👌 Janis: Really? Nothing to do with how scared you are of these crazy bitches k Jimmy: fed up ain't scared Janis: still Janis: you need me Janis: don't forget it, pal Jimmy: I won't if you don't, mate

[punkscowardschampions]

Bea & Buster

Bea: Buster, I appreciate you were doing Rio a favour but you need to go back to School, yesterday, like Bea: You've missed enough time as is Buster: She isn't ready yet Buster: I can't just leave her here Bea: I'm not asking about her, Rio can and will make her own plans Bea: This is about what you need to do Buster: I need to stay here Buster: I'm getting my work sent. It's fine Bea: What's going on here? Bea: Rio is perfectly capable of being on her own, and assuming that's why she needed to leave town, she doesn't need you there Buster: You just said it's only what I need to do that matters Buster: And I told you Buster: End of conversation Bea: You need to go to school Bea: Not up for discussion Buster: No, I need not to fall behind, which I'm not Buster: Why does it matter? You never normally bother to keep tabs Bea: Don't talk to me like that when you've given us reason to need to and you've always benefitted off our parenting approach before now Bea: What aren't you telling me, Buster? Buster: How exactly have I given you reason not to trust me? Buster: If I'm not telling you something, there's a reason Bea: When you may or may not have impregnated that girl Bea: is reason enough, no? Buster: When she took advantage of me, you mean Buster: Everyone else understands how fucked up that was, why don't you? Bea: I understand Bea: I also understand how you got yourself in the situation that was even a possibility Buster: So it's my fault for getting wasted Buster: Really nice, mum Bea: That isn't what I'm saying or what we're talking about Buster: What then? Buster: Let's not waste each other's time, shall we Bea: You're not too old for a slap Bea: But you are too old to behave like this Bea: Right, what's going on with you and Rio? Buster: I already told you why we're here Bea: Not what I asked or meant Bea: but your avoidance will speak for you if you don't chime in Buster: What do you want me to say? Buster: You clearly think you know something as things stand Bea: The truth Bea: I want to hear it from you Buster: I can't Bea: Oh God Bea: I don't need to hear the ins and outs but I'm right, aren't I? Buster: Nobody's in the headspace for this right now, mum Buster: Can't you just forget it Buster: Whatever you think Bea: No, I can't Bea: if I could I would Bea: what are you thinking Bea: you're only going to make things awkward for yourself Buster: Whatever you're not thinking, that's what I'm thinking Buster: 'Cause this isn't what you reckon it is, alright? Bea: So you're not sleeping together? Buster: Yeah but Bea: I knew it Bea: well, on both your heads be it because this won't end well Bea: I don't have to tell you how stupid it is Buster: I shouldn't have to tell you that I don't care, but I will if you need to hear it Buster: It's not stupid to us Bea: Evidently Buster: Don't Buster: You don't understand Bea: What don't I understand? Buster: I love her Buster: No, we love each other Bea: Don't joke about things like that Buster: I'm serious Bea: What Bea: No Bea: You better not be Buster: I am Buster: And she is Bea: When did this happen exactly Bea: how Buster: When did we get together or when did I fall in love with her? Buster: As for how, as you'd realized you must have some idea, yeah? Bea: When do you think you fell in love Bea: I do have some idea as for when it first started, I'm sure Buster: Maybe when I was a kid Buster: I've been fighting it for so long, I don't even know Buster: But we said it at Granddad's birthday Bea: Don't be ridiculous, that's a childhood crush Bea: How do you even know, you're so young Buster: You do know how much a hypocrite you're being, right? Buster: Shall I break the news to dad that you don't love him or would you rather Bea: This isn't about me and your Father Bea: it's different, you're different Buster: Maybe but I'm not a child Bea: No Bea: Just Bea: like you said, no one needs this Buster: We aren't going to tell anyone Buster: Else, I mean Buster: Someone else might but Bea: Well who the hell else knows Buster: Chloe thinks she does but I sorted that Buster: The main problem is that Drew knows for sure Buster: So far he's only told Indie but I doubt he's in any mood to keep our secrets now Bea: This is ridiculous Bea: Lord Buster: I'm sorry Buster: Not about me and her but that he can be the one to out us, especially right now Bea: No, I'm sorry for you Bea: because you have no idea how difficult you're making things for yourself Bea: it's you two that'll get hurt Bea: it might make a few people uncomfortable but really, not our business who you decide to bed in general so Bea: can't you just stop Buster: I get what you're saying but I do know how hard its already been Buster: And what it's already been like trying to act like we don't feel this way Buster: That really hurts too Buster: So no, we don't want wanna stop Buster: We wanna be together Bea: But how do you suppose you're going to do that if you're not going to tell everyone and live open and honest Bea: It won't work Buster: The same as we have been Buster: We will tell everyone, just not yet, like Buster: Unless Drew does and we have to Bea: You aren't going to have a choice Bea: he has no reason not to Bea: and that will taint how this is percieved, like it or not Buster: I can't make Rio tell everyone now, mum Buster: She doesn't even wanna go home as it is Bea: So let Drew speak for you? Buster: You know I don't want that Bea: I know Bea: I can't promise you he won't Bea: and I fail to see how you can assure that either yourself Bea: either way, you'll be forced to react somehow Buster: I've hurt him before, if I need to I'll do it again Bea: That's neither sensible nor practical Bea: though I see the appeal Buster: Tell what to do then Buster: If you were me, how would you handle it? Bea: You have to own it Bea: or else everyone else will decide what it is for you Bea: personally, I'd want to say before he did but if she can't then Bea: she can't, simple as Bea: but she isn't planning to stay in Skerries forever is she Buster: Obviously not Buster: She's coming back to London with me Bea: Nice of you to run that past me Bea: it's only my house, like Buster: She doesn't have to stay there but she's still coming Buster: I could hardly run it past you when I've only just convinced her myself and I didn't expect to have this convo Buster: What could I have said, exactly? Buster: She needs me, it's that simple Buster: If you don't like it, you don't like it Buster: I don't care Bea: You'd be running it past me when she was suddenly there Bea: Talk whatever shit you like we're not quite that checked out Bea: You're 18, you have no business doing anything like this, especially when your priority is where you'll be come October Buster: I have no business doing what, being in love? Buster: Or trying to take care of Rio after months and months of Drew's bullshit? Bea: Of moving her in! Bea: That's too far Buster: Then we'll go to a hotel Buster: It's not the first time Bea: You're going home and you're focusing on your exams Buster: I'm focusing on my exams regardless Buster: But I'll be staying with Rio, wherever that is Bea: Fine, it's your life Bea: but I don't have to fund it Bea: we'll cover the basics but that's it Buster: Fine Buster: I'm not doing this for a holiday Bea: If she's really coming to London then she can stay whilst she gets sorted with what she's doing but you aren't just moving her in Buster: That was never my intention Buster: I'm not trying to use this fucked up situation to my own advantage like that. Give me some credit, Jesus Bea: I didn't say you were Bea: I'm telling you to not get carried away, or try to tell me how it is in my own home Buster: What do you think is going to happen? Buster: I'm just trying to look after her Buster: I thought you'd be happy about that much Bea: Obviously I care about Rio and her wellbeing Bea: I just don't want you to get caught up in this because it's been so intense thus far Buster: I hear you but you have to understand that I'm deep in this Buster: I love her Bea: I know Bea: but you have to understand your sister also believes she's deeply in love with her straight married teacher so Bea: you and your cousin? I was hoping we'd be able to skip this conversation Bea: forgive me Buster: I'm sorry, mum Buster: It's not like I wanted this to happen, okay Buster: I tried really hard not to want it or let it Buster: For years I couldn't even be in the same room as her, do you have any idea what that's like? Bea: I know you didn't Bea: It Bea: it is what it is Bea: it's a shock but, if it can't be helped then it can't Buster: I know I keep letting you down Buster: But don't hate me, yeah? Buster: Or her Bea: I don't hate you Bea: either of you Bea: It isn't even that it's strictly a bad thing Bea: just a complicated thing, okay? Buster: Yeah Buster: Everything's a mess Buster: But she's the only thing keeping me sane through any of it Bea: Are things really that bad? Bea: I know the Chloe situation is stressful but Buster: It's not just stressful, what she's capable of is scares the shit out of me Buster: Add all the sneaking around and having to handle everything Drew's been trying to do Buster: I don't get to be honest with anyone about basically anything Bea: No, sorry, I shouldn't have worded it that way Bea: That is a lot for you to shoulder Bea: but the Drew stuff is over now, he's finished Bea: and you can talk to me and your Dad, I know you probably don't want to, about many things, but you always can Buster: It's not over for us 'cause he knows and whether he says anything now or not, there's the threat of it until we can speak for ourselves like you said Buster: It's another thing hanging over me while the Chloe thing still is Bea: That's why I really don't think you should wait much longer Bea: Easier said than done, I know but it probably would be easier than the stress of this Buster: But if I rush her into this and it goes badly with everyone else it'll ruin everything Buster: I can't lose her Buster: Not 'cause of him Bea was timed out 87 minutes ago Bea joined the chat 86 minutes ago Bea: Everyone will be alright Bea: Especially her family, they're pretty progressive Buster: Are you gonna tell dad about this? Bea: I don't have to Bea: It's up to you Buster: Please don't Buster: He'll look at me like I'm a massive fuck up again Bea: Oh, Buster Bea: Look, you can't help what you feel Bea: all you can do is work out the best way to handle it and move forward Bea: I won't say anything, period, so don't worry about that Bea: if this is what you want, then we'll both be happy for you, as long as you are Buster: Yeah? Buster: She makes me happy Buster: I know I need to handle it better though Bea: Yeah Bea: You don't need to have everything worked out, okay Bea: but you know, it helps if you can at least act it to the world Buster: Well, if nothing else, I can do that, like Bea: I know you can Buster: I love you too, you know that, yeah? Bea: Of course we do Bea: and we love you Buster: I swear you won't always have to deal with shit like this from me Bea: You're a teenager, it's what you're meant to do Bea: Don't worry about us, we're big enough and ugly enough to handle whatever you reckon you've got, that's our job Bea: Don't forget that, I know we aren't always there but we are, yeah? Buster: I do know that Buster: I just didn't always want it but Buster: I'm tired now, I'm so tired of acting like this all the time Buster: Not gonna let my guard down to the fucking world, like, what you said was right but Bea: I get it Bea: It's not a crime to want to work some things out on your own but you don't need to be isolated when that's no longer what you want Bea: It's normal, well, normal for us Buster: It's not always a bad thing Buster: I'm not trying to say you fucked me up, don't worry Bea: I'll just mark it down as another teenage cliche if you do, cheek Buster: I save those for Nance Bea: I'd tell her you said that Bea: but I've been enjoying the lack of squabbling and bitching lately Buster: Yeah, well I can't promise anything after she finds out everything I'm not telling her Bea: It's like you said Bea: she took advantage of you, and has been playing mindgames ever since Bea: your sister will understand only too well what she's capable of Bea: again, going to be a shock but she isn't going to blame you Buster: It'll be alright Buster: Whatever I have to do Bea: Yes Bea: Good Buster: Thanks mum, seriously Buster: I wasn't trying to turn this convo into you talking me off the ledge, like Bea: No need Bea: If you say you've got School handled, I believe you Bea: just keep me in the loop of what you're going to do next, yeah? Buster: I will Buster: We are coming back soon, I'm working on it Buster: What's it like there? Do I even wanna ask Bea: I know Bea: She's on autopilot now, which is good for the baby but any time I try to make her talk she just reminds me of stressing the baby so Bea: she's shutdown, frankly Buster: She's due soon Buster: Fuck knows if that'll be better or worse Bea: She feels most comfortable in medical settings Bea: I don't want to go there with how you can lose control in birth because well Bea: She just falls back on what needs to be done, always has Buster: Is she still home? I won't bring Rio to ours if you want Ro there Bea: No, she won't leave, her whole birth plan is in Dublin, you know how rigid she is Bea: I'll be staying here with her for a bit Bea: she'd already nested heavily, with his crap out there's barely a trace of Drew so Buster: Okay Buster: What about dad? Bea: He's already back in London Bea: he finds all this difficult, and Ro Buster: Who can blame him? Bea: Well, exactly Bea: but as I said, you're welcome to both go back there, I can warn him if you like but he'll be busy and you know he's not one to ask questions Buster: I can handle it Buster: You've got enough to do Bea: Alright Bea: I'll be commuting back and forth but I probably won't have much chance to check in at home Bea: but you know where I am Buster: Yeah Buster: And you can call me whenever, like Buster: I'll answer Buster: Except if I'm at school, 'cause you know, really important stuff Bea: Watch it Buster: Look after yourself too, mum, yeah? Bea: 'Course Buster: Then we're done Bea: There are more socially acceptable ways to end conversations, you know Buster: As well as less socially acceptable ones Buster: But fine Bea: Goodbye, Buster Buster: See you around, mum

[punkscowardschampions]

Buster & Rio

Buster: I need to talk to you Rio: Sounds serious Rio: Go on Buster: I am being Buster: So can you really talk right now or not? Rio: Yeah, I can Rio: What's wrong? Buster: Everything Buster: I should do this over the phone at least, I'm sorry Buster: Fuck Rio: Are you okay? Rio: Just, start from the start, yeah? Buster: No, I'm not Buster: But it's my own fault Buster: I fucked up so badly last night, babe Buster: I slept with someone at the party Rio: Oh Rio: Fuck Buster: I'm sorry Buster: I didn't mean to Rio: Of course not Rio: High, yeah? That makes it alright then, fucking hell Buster: I mean, yeah, I was wasted Buster: Not an excuse just a fact, like Rio: Right Rio: I don't know what to say to you Buster: You can say anything you want Buster: Just talk to me Rio: I don't want to Rio: because it's just words, yeah Rio: and I've told you so much said so much oh my god Buster: It's not Buster: It's how we can fix this Buster: Please Rio: You don't get to dictate how we fix this Rio: not when you've just fucked it Buster: Then tell me what to do Buster: Or what to say Rio: Is there anything you can say that'll make me not feel like the biggest fucking idiot? Rio: If not, don't even bother Buster: I don't know Buster: But I'll try Buster: I'll do anything Buster: 'Cause I'm the idiot, not you Rio: Why Rio: Why did you have to ruin it Buster: I don't know why Buster: I don't remember why Buster: I don't remember anything Rio: That's fucked, Buster Buster: I know Buster: So was I, I was so drunk and so high Buster: And I just Buster: Well, it apparently happened Rio: She shouldn't have done that, whoever she is Rio: but shit, things like this are going to keep happening if you don't sort yourself Buster: I shouldn't have done it either Buster: She must've been wasted too, like Buster: It was that kind of party Rio: Whatever, I'm not telling you how to feel about it or what to do but it's dubious ground Rio: you're lucky it's you that is on this side of it, what if a girl woke up feeling this unsure about you Rio: could be a totally different story Buster: What are you saying? Buster: I wouldn't do that to any girl, even Chlo Rio: I'm not saying you would but put yourself in risky situations then you can't control what's said Rio: Jesus, Buster Buster: It's only a risk to me and you Buster: Everything else is fine Rio: Thank God! Rio: You're so stupid Buster: Whatever Buster: I deserve that Rio: Yeah, you really do Buster: I love you Rio: Don't Rio: don't do that right now Buster: But I do Buster: And I miss you Rio: You don't get to say that Buster: I just want you to know it's still true Buster: Nothing's changed Rio: It has though, hasn't it Buster: No Rio: It has Rio: I can't Buster: Don't say that Buster: I made a mistake but that's it Buster: One mistake Buster: I'll make it up to you Rio: You wanna make it up to me? Don't put yourself in this position again Rio: that's all you can do Buster: Okay Buster: I won't Buster: Everything's been so fucked and when you couldn't come it got more of a mess but I'll handle it better Rio: I don't wanna hear that right now Rio: I can't be responsible for the shit you wanna pull if this is it Buster: I'm just trying to explain Buster: It's not like that Buster: I didn't want any of this to happen Buster: I wasn't trying to get back at you or whatever and I'm not trying to blame you Rio: Get back at me? For what? Rio: What the hell have I done Buster: I'm just saying I didn't go out intending to fuck someone 'cause you weren't here Rio: Good to know Buster: Rio Buster: Come on Rio: What Rio: What do you want from me? Buster: Forgive me Buster: I fucked up and I'm sorry Buster: But you know what you mean to me Rio: I do Rio: and maybe I'm just confirming myself a moron all over again but I believe you're sorry as well Rio: but I'm not going to just roll over Rio: act like it never happened Rio: I can't Buster: You're not stupid and I'm not asking you to act like one by being my doormat, yeah? Buster: Just let me prove that I did the wrong thing but everything doesn't have to be ruined 'cause of a stupid night I barely remember Buster: Give a chance Buster: to me and us Rio: Alright Rio: but you give me time Rio: and space Buster: You can have anything you want Rio: Why her Buster: I don't know Buster: She must've been persistent 'cause I remember her trying to kiss me and me pushing her away earlier on Buster: She's always hanging around Rio: All it really takes right Buster: What? Rio: It's what you like, someone that'll do all the chasing, all the work, you've always said it Buster: Yeah but that's not what this is Buster: I don't like her Rio: It's my mistake for convincing myself I was any different Rio: Now it's not easy enough what's the point yeah Buster: No, your mistake is trying to convince yourself of that Buster: You are different Buster: And I'm different 'cause of you Buster: You know that Rio: I don't know what I know now Buster: Bullshit Buster: It's never been easy either and I've never cared Buster: I love you Buster: I want to be with you Rio: Stop Rio: I love you but you're hurting me so just Buster: Alright Buster: I'll stop Rio joined the chat 3 hours ago Rio: Fuck Rio: Maybe that's what we should just do Rio: it's clearly too hard Buster: Don't Buster: Don't give up Rio: I can't and that's the fucked up thing Rio: You knew that Buster: Yeah, I fucked up Buster: How else can I say I'm sorry? Tell me I'll do it Rio: You can't Rio: it is what it is Rio: can't unfuck her Buster: I know Buster: Can't we just start over from now? Rio: What Rio: you reckon it'll never happen again or that's how it is from now? Buster: Of course it'll never happen again Rio: You didn't even know it had happened this time Rio: how are you promising that Buster: I won't get that wrecked any more Buster: Easy promise Rio: Is it Rio: Don't chat shit 'cos you think it's what I wanna hear Buster: Don't be like that Buster: What, like you've never gone and got fucked up and made mistakes? Come on Buster: It's not like I'm taking the family junkie role over Rio: Shut up Rio: I'm not saying I haven't but that doesn't mean you get a get out of jail free card, or that I fucking expected one Rio: that ain't how life is Buster: I'm not asking for one Buster: Fuck's sake Rio: You are though, you want me to be over it now Buster: That's not what I'm saying Buster: I just don't want us to be over Rio: We aren't Rio: but I Rio: I don't know Rio: I can't be this jealous and angry and hurt Rio: I don't need this Buster: Alright Buster: What do you need? Buster: Like I said, you can have anything Rio: I needed you, you fucking prick Rio: that's all I ever asked for Buster: But I'm still here, I swear Buster: I know I hurt you but I won't ever do that again Rio: How did you not get how serious I was about this Rio: Why would you say all that shit and turn around and do this Buster: I didn't get anything last night, I was barely upright Buster: If I was thinking it wouldn't have happened Buster: 'Cause I mean everything I've said to you and I know you do too Rio: Yeah, well you can think on it now, like Buster: What can I say? If everybody knew then they could have stopped me Buster: But it's all just banter to them now Rio: Yeah, your friends are shit Rio: and like I said, it's dubious it went down when you were so gone Rio: but what can I do about either of those things Rio: I can only react to it all after the fact Buster: Well, yeah, same Rio: You can do more about it than I can Buster: And I've said I will Buster: But I can't undo it now either Buster: I wish I could Rio: I know Rio: Me too but that ain't happening Buster: So what? Do you want me to go? Rio: Don't put it on me to decide Buster: But it is your decision Buster: I don't get to make it Rio: Well I don't want to Rio: Fuck you for making me Buster: I'm not making you do anything Rio: Well you are Rio: I can't just do nothing now Buster: Babe Buster: I don't know what else I can say or do at this point Buster: I can't come and see you if you want time and space Buster: And I can't keep repeating myself 'cause you'll think I don't mean it Buster: So yeah, you have to do something, but you can do whatever you want Rio: I don't want this Rio: There's no option I want so don't act like there is Rio: just, look after yourself Rio: leave me alone Buster: I know Buster: And I'm so fucking sorry Buster: Please talk to Indie if you don't wanna talk to me Buster: At least she knows and she can look after you for me Rio: How can I? Rio: Just confirm what she reckoned Rio: have her thinking I'm that fucking dumb that I'd risk fucking my life up just to get fucked and chucked Buster: Someone else then naming no names Buster: Whatever Buster: But she wouldn't think that 'cause it's not true Buster: You know that, yeah? Rio: I can look after myself Rio: Always have Buster: Stop Buster: I know you don't want me to keep saying it but I still care about you Buster: You don't have to bullshit me, Rio, nothing's changed that much Rio: Maybe but I still have to bullshit everyone else Rio: that can't change Buster: Yes it can Rio: Oh yeah? Rio: Where do you suggest I begin? Rio: With the abusive stalker ex or the casual incest Buster: Frankly, either or Buster: But don't call us casual Buster: You're the only girl who's ever been more than that to me Rio: Fuck's sake, Buster Buster: What? Buster: It's not my fault you don't want your family to know the real you Rio: Can you blame me? Rio: The fucking state of affairs, they don't need that Buster: What about what you need? Buster: Why don't you care? Rio: I'm fine Buster: Bullshit Buster: I did it, I know you're not Buster: Don't lie to me Rio: Whatever Rio: it's exhausting, I'm tired Buster: That's my point, you've gotta lay your head down somewhere, babe Buster: Why not your family, you don't wanna tell them about us in case you lose them, if you're keeping them you might as well get something out of it Rio: If I don't know what to do Rio: Why would any of them Rio: I wouldn't wish this shit on anyone, never mind them Buster: There's enough of them to run a poll if you want Buster: Christ sake Rio: Don't joke Buster: I'm not Buster: Open up to someone besides me, yeah? It's not rocket science Rio: Yeah no, you made it clear you're over it Rio: You going to too, or nah? Buster: Stop saying I'm over it Buster: And do what I say not what I do, like Rio: Thought so Buster: Don't Buster: I don't know how you can say that other than to hurt me back, never mind think it seriously Rio: I don't know Rio: What are we doing Rio: I mean, seriously Buster: I don't get to answer that Rio: Right Buster: I love you so much and maybe that's the problem Buster: maybe it can't work 'cause I miss you too much and it's always gonna be a mess Buster: But I'm always gonna try anyway Buster: You said that it's gonna be so good so soon, you believed it and so do I Rio: But until then Rio: this isn't going to work, is it Buster: I want it to Buster: And I always get what I want, so yeah, it will Buster: But it's not just me Rio: You're an idiot Buster: Yeah, I am Buster: Still yours though Rio: I love you Buster: I love you too Buster: I've waited years for you, I'll do it again if that's how long it takes for you to also not hate me Rio: Okay Buster: Okay

[punkscowardschampions]

Nancy & Rio

Nancy: Not to be weird, because I obviously don't mind if so, but are you wearing my clothes in your latest insta pics or have I lost my mind? Rio: Oh my God, sorry! Shoulda said before putting that up Rio: casual single white female situation Rio: I was in London and I had to stop by yours to avoid a real walk of shame... whole 'nother story, assumed it'd be alright 'cos you know, you weren't using 'em? Shipped back fully dry cleaned, swear down Rio: Not to drop him in it but shamelessly will, Buster said it'd probably be alright too lol Nancy: Well we have the brunette and redhead thing going on, already. Just don't murder me like Nancy: It's more than okay. They look great on you and they are just sitting there Nancy: Keep them if you want Nancy: I'd rather you than one of Buster's 'guests' Nancy: Did you talk to him? Rio: Last time I check, no feelings of murderous jealousy towards you Rio: Even if you do have a killer clothes collection Rio: You're too sweet! I'm nowhere near statuesque enough to rock it for serious but it was fun playing dressup, not gonna lie Rio: A little bit, yeah, as much as you can with him Rio: Has he reached out to you yet? Nancy: We should go shopping then. I'm not flooded with other offers or compliments right now Nancy: He did try but I didn't answer the call. I didn't know what to say, you know Nancy: Do I want to know what he said about me, if anything? Rio: Absolutely, always up for a style update Rio: and I promise to stay away for the red box dye Rio: Rihanna 2010 I ain't Rio: That's fair, I remember he mentioned that too Rio: He said a lot of things, some of 'em stupid which don't bear repeating but I could tell he was worried about you, checking you were okay, like Nancy: Oh god Nancy: I should've answered I just couldn't Nancy: I've already broken my own heart there's no handling if he decided to do it for me too Nancy: It was like I already hear what he was going to say Rio: No one is judgding you for not Rio: He's been guility of being unavailable for less Rio: You're more than entitled to take your time with this Rio: Let him cool down too, I put him right where I could but Rio: He's stubborn Nancy: And he thinks I'm as cringey as everyone at school does, right? Nancy: I knew it Nancy: I can't blame him really Rio: But that's nothing you don't know, you feel the embarrassment, I don't get why people think they're being clever pointing out as if its not your first hand experience Rio: He asked if you were coming back Rio: which he clearly wants, even if he's not gonna outright say that Nancy: I thought he might be on my side since he always goes after what he wants Nancy: Maybe he is though, if he does want me home Rio: Yeah, there's definitely hypocrisy otherwise Rio: I'm not gonna commit him to either side from a conversation relayed but I don't think talking to him soon will make it any worse Rio: Hoping he said all the dumb shit he needed to me instead, like Nancy: Was he such a prick to you? I'm sorry Nancy: I can't go back until those girls are far away at uni Nancy: Do you think we could convince him to come here? Team effort to get a visit? Rio: Not all bad Rio: and nothing I can't handle Rio: Yeah, reckon I might've met some of them last night Rio: and I feel you Rio: Worth a shot, I threw it out there that maybe if he came it'd make your 'rents coming less of a shitshow Rio: try and hold him to it Nancy: The ringleader is Chloe, with an accent over the e. You'd remember her if you did Nancy: It wouldn't surprise me if she was still hanging around him and his friends, she always did fancy him Nancy: Okay. I'll try Rio: Oh my God, her?! Rio: If she gave me daggers any harder I woulda been bleeding Rio: Such an unlikely candidate, no offence Chlo hun but total Rio: always the girls with the least going for them, honestly Nancy: That's her specialty Nancy: What's it say about me that I used to think we were actually friends once Rio: She looks like she can play nice when she wants to Rio: with your Brother, like you said Rio: Ugh Nancy: Yeah. She didn't want to play nice after I came out but she did a convincing enough job before Rio: Bet she thought you were in love with her and everything? Rio: What a cliche mean girl Nancy: Oh she went one better and told everyone I made a move of her, which even I wouldn't Rio: Oh, don't flatter yourself Rio: What a cow! Yeah, she's not changed at all then, obviously I avoided her best I could but she was way too happy about my drama Nancy: Like I know what I did with Sian was bad but Nancy: Please, I do have some standards Nancy: What happened with you? I didn't even ask. What a cow I am Rio: Yeah, she's not a catch, whatever way you're swinging, sorry to be a bitch but you were first gurl and that's always gonna be a turn-off Rio: Oh nah, nothing major, well, it was very dramatic but over it whilst it was happening so I'm not bothered Rio: Curtis went with me and then decided to get all huffy and try and make me leave early 'cos I was 'dancing too sexy' or whatever Rio: when I wouldn't he literally left me there, considering he drove us over, he had the hotel key Rio: Cue mad rush trying to find a place to crash and a way back Rio: Safe to say he's chucked Nancy: Oh my god! There's no words for how out of order that is. What an utter prick! Nancy: Buster better have offered you my bed Nancy: I'll kill him if he never Rio: Oh yeah, he did Rio: Offered to pay the way back but I thought that was too far Rio: Between taking your bed and clothes, like, need to at least try and sort half of it myself, like! Nancy: At least he's not a total prick himself ALL the time Nancy: Remembering some of how he was raised now Nancy: Are you in London rn still? Rio: Yeah, I'd say we can give him that Rio: Will go to his head but what you gonna do Rio: I am Rio: Toying with staying for a bit but I'll defs get in more shit for doing that for going with Curtis in the first place so Rio: Should probs get the soonest flight back now Nancy: My bed and wardrobe are yours if you are staying Nancy: Did you see my mum and dad? Nancy: While we're mentioning being in lots of shit, like Rio: I appreciate it, Nance Rio: I did my best to avoid then, and succeeded, thankfully, not really the vibe I'm looking to give out to the olders like Rio: Buster didn't seem keen to talk to them either, so they may very well be on the warpath towards Dubo and you...Soz to confirm Nancy: Care to teach me some of your ways before they end my life? I'd REALLY appreciate it tbh Nancy: Fantastic. That sounds accurate Rio: Umm, get them drunk and they'll be sleeping as you sneak about like Anne Frank? Rio: ORRRRR, whilst they're mid-air, come back to London, ha Nancy: Get mum REALLY angry Nancy: Nice subtle nod to my gayness with the Anne Frank ref though Nancy: And you're definitely onto something with getting dad a drink Rio: Say you're coming to rescue me, I can be FAR more dramatic about this breakup than I'm really feeling Rio: edge of fucking tower bridge like Rio: of course, all bisexuals are upheld in the highest esteem in my household Rio: especially brave little jewish girls Nancy: Good plan, if I can be this dramatic about a non-break up then we can make this believable I'm sure Nancy: Take the heroics from my brother too, always great Nancy: I see the bed and clothes gesture and I raise you Rio: Everyone loves a bit of sibling rivalry put to use Rio: get us both off the hook in one fell swoop Rio: Only flaw in the plan is Chloe with the accent Rio: Going to have to work on that so she's outta the way by the time you get here Nancy: I'd suggest taking her to the bridge and pushing her off but I don't need to go to prison Rio: If you thought the gay jokes were bad now Nancy: Exactly Nancy: And nobody needs a rebound that badly, least of all me Rio: They say some people go to Prison for the roof over their head and three meals a day Rio: wonder if anyone has ever gone in purely for the pussay Nancy: As a vegetarian I feel I'd have to Nancy: If only casual sex was my thing. Wouldn't have got here Rio: Yeah, it ain't for everyone Rio: at least you didn't get to fuck her, THEN catch feelings Rio: that'd be even shittier like and what happens to so many girls in our year when they do the 'casual' thing Rio: no wonder they're being salty little bitches about it Nancy: But that way it wouldn't have been all in my head Nancy: Maybe they have a point, I don't know Rio: It wouldn't make this bit any easier Rio: the actual heartbreak shit Rio: the people being cunts, less so Rio: but they'll find any reason, someone else will be the target next week, like Nancy: I know you're right Nancy: And I don't want her life ruined so Rio: Yeah, but you gotta think about you and your life too Rio: She's fine Nancy: Don't rub it in, please Nancy: I feel like my life's over Rio: I know sweets Rio: but it ain't Rio: you'll just keep going Nancy: I know I will, but I don't want to. Like I know she couldn't love me but I still want her too Nancy: It hurts Rio: Its going to Rio: for a while yet Rio: revel in it Rio: how unfair it feels Rio: 'cos its not a sexuality thing, if you were straight or she was gay or whatever the fuck, when you feel like you love someone and they just don't back Rio: that's gonna hurt regardless of the how you got there Rio: its not just because she was a teacher, everyone's been there, like Rio: Promise Nancy: I wish everyone saw this how you do Nancy: You're the best Nancy: June too but he doesn't get this bit yet Nancy: Though he can appreciate the wonders this will do for my art Rio: Gotta suffer, might as well get paid for it Rio: or A's Rio: at the very least Rio: I don't know, Junior is so guarded, I wonder if he ever will, not that I wish that bit on him but you've gotta go through it so its better to get it over with really Nancy: Especially because my Irish grades are gonna take a dive Nancy: I think he will Nancy: He just needs the right one to fall for Nancy: I appreciate how that sounds coming from me rn but Rio: Oh the awkwardness of that first lesson back is gonna be Rio: I'll deffo come Home by then Rio: I hope so, I know he's not happy hiding who he is, so I don't think he's content being alone forever, like, either Nancy: Oh god please do. I'll need all the help I can get Nancy: He won't be. He's a catch. I keep telling him Rio: Pretty sure push it any harder and I'm being dragged back by my hair lmao Rio: Totally, he just needs to get a lil confidence Rio: Not a complete personality change but just enough to give him that push Nancy: We're working on it Rio: Yay! Shame we can't be real speedy about it, get him getting a man to distract all the attention from you like Nancy: That's okay I wouldn't wish it on him Nancy: I can handle it. Sort of Rio: Yeah you can Rio: You've got this Nancy: So our brother keeps saying. But he makes it we because he's everything Nancy: *your Rio: Y'all are cuties Nancy: If you could use your influence on my brother to make him bearable I'll be your best friend Rio: I definitely cannot make promises there Rio: He goes out of his way to be un Rio: but he's alright really, I think lol Nancy: I'll have to take your word on that Nancy: Until I talk to him myself Rio: Let me know how it all works out like Nancy: Definitely

[punkscowardschampions]

Rio & Buster

Rio: McKenna, don't suppose you've got my debit? Checking around before I cancel it Buster: Hang on, I'll have a scout Buster: Not seeing it Rio: Great Buster: Want me to call the club? They might have it Rio: Don't bother, place was so sketchy they'd probably just keep it themselves if it wasn't knicked by a random Buster: I can't remember Buster: Where were we? Rio: Gonna get far calling them then weren't ya? Rio: Krystle Rio: first in a series of bad ideas Buster: Weren't complaining at the time Buster: I remember that much Rio: Speak for yourself, dickhead Rio: that was probably some other bitch you're 'fondly remembering' over there 👌🍆 Buster: Give me some credit Buster: Even if a thief has fucked yours Rio: What, not working on your overall score last night? Buster: Wasn't in the mood strangely enough, almost like I'd been at a funeral Rio: 🙄 what a terrible inconvenience for you Rio: not what she woulda wanted for you, respect the dead's wishes Buster: Too busy fulfilling the wishes of the living Rio: Sure, didn't need that much convincing Rio: Didn't fuck my brains out, lad Buster: I'm not the one acting like I did Buster: It happened I'm not gonna cry about it Rio: Fucking should Rio: Your Ma certainly would Rio: mine too if she weren't otherwise engaged Buster: Fuck that Buster: She's got room to talk Buster: Her and my dad grew up together just like we did Rio: Hm Rio: True enough, McKenna Rio: just following family tradition of being fucked up Buster: Following in my parents footsteps like a good lad Rio: well, I'd suggest you find another cousin to maintain the legacy with but if you go near any of them I will kill you myself Buster: Nice to know that's what you think of me Rio: Did you expect a different reception? Rio: What the fuck Buster: Don't drag them into this shit, alright? Buster: We did it. Us Buster: I'm not collecting cousins Rio: I'm not saying I didn't but I know my reasoning Rio: Why did you? Buster: 'cause I wanted to Rio: No shit, I knew that, I was there, remember? Rio: but why, and fuck it, don't need to tell me but ask yourself maybe Buster: I don't know what magic words you're expecting Buster: It's not that deep Rio: Don't be stupid Rio: I want to know what's wrong with you Buster: Ain't nothing wrong here Rio: Fine Rio: Whatever helps you sleep at night, McKenna Buster: I can pay for a shrink, Cavante, I don't need your amateur attempts Rio: So can I Rio: Dunno if the funds will stretch for all 9 of us though Rio: Spare a thought Buster: I already do Rio: Does your philanthropy know no bounds? Rio: Feeling the love Buster: Surprised you've got room next to the guilt Rio: what the fuck are you saying Buster: Such a big mistake, yeah? Rio: yeah, what else could it be? Buster: A good time Buster: They're in short supply around here right now Rio: Whatever you say Rio: Not like this kind of thing isn't what got me here in first place Buster: Drew being a perv had nothing to do with you Rio: You're wrong Rio: hardly one-sided either Buster: Yeah it was Buster: Everyone knows that Rio: I thought he was hot, I'd say as much, I flirted with him Buster: Even if you were wet for him you'd never have gone there Buster: You wouldn't do it to Indie Buster: She idolises that cunt. Or did Rio: Wouldn't I? Rio: Think what you like, I don't wanna talk about it anymore Buster: We don't have to, but come on, Rio, it ain't about what I think Rio: No, it ain't Rio: Don't matter what any of us think or say Rio: too late Buster: It's his fuck up Buster: not yours Rio: and where the fuck is he then? did you see him at the funeral crying his heart out? Rio: 'cos I fucking didn't Buster: No Buster: I wish I had, I'd knock him out Rio: Lol Rio: no one would be rushing to stop you Buster: Good Buster: You at home? Rio: why? wanna come round and meet the parents? Buster: Of course Buster: Parents love me Rio: you love yourself Rio: and stop trying to make me laugh Buster: Yeah, and? Buster: I'm not trying anything Buster: Natural gifts, babe Rio: Everyone's got to have something they're good at, suppose Buster: Man of many gifts Buster: Won't rub it in though Buster: Sore enough today, aren't ya? Rio: Don't push it, McKenna Rio: what I should have said Rio: nothing but grazes from the wall, handled worse Buster: I'll wait 'til tonight if you don't like it in the cold light of day Buster: Since you were saying everything but then Rio: and you've never said anything you regret in the moment, eh? Rio: must've said something to Chlo you didn't mean for her to be so 😍 Buster: What's the point if it worked at the time Buster: She heard what she wanted to hear, I never lied Buster: I'm not gonna feel bad for how she interprets things Rio: Heaven forbid Buster McKenna ever feels bad about anything 😜 Buster: Why should I? Rio: If you've done something wrong Rio: but fair on her, not saying otherwise there, she's clearly a 🐰🍲 Buster: Like I said, ain't nothing wrong here Buster: Cheers for the backup on that though Rio: Perhaps not in your fam Rio: but people as a whole would disagree there Buster: I can't speak for anyone but myself, babe Rio: You're seriously infuriating Rio: But I'm sure you already knew that 😏 Buster: Today I'm actually not trying to be Buster: It is what it is I guess Rio: Old habits Rio: Wouldn't be right if you were nice all of a sudden Buster: Yeah Buster: And I do aim to please so Rio: Thanks Rio: for not falling back on cliches 'cos you don't know what else to say Buster: Again, gimme some credit like Rio: Nah Rio: give you an inch, like Buster: Can't argue that, good as I am at it Rio: tell me, had you considered a career in law? 🤔 Rio: how's uni going anyway? Buster: Acing it as per Rio: 🙄 Glad I asked Rio: still, nice to be near Jay, less desirable to be near her Ma but what you gonna do Buster: Too right Buster: I've got her for a few days when I go back Buster: Chlo is treating this time in Dublin like it's a holiday and reckons she deserves one Rio: Naturally Rio: everyone knows how rowdy Irish wakes get Rio: practically Ibiza with the lads Rio: at least you actually enjoy having your kid around so not the punishment she intends it to be Buster: Exactly Buster: You can come see her if you're that way Buster: And want Rio: Better not, eh Rio: Cute distraction, as she is Buster: I'll pass it on Buster: She don't hold a grudge for long yet Rio: she can't even hold her own head up Rio: come for me when you've got object permanence, babe 😂 Buster: Made you laugh Rio: You're baby-brained, McKenna Rio: telling me you've got my nose in a sec Buster: You'd fall for it Rio: Fuck off 😂 Rio: Might not be a Mum but I've got 9 youngers I've been entertaining since the cradle days Rio: 10 if you count Indie Rio: well, back down to 9 now, ha Buster: How is she? Rio: Fucked Rio: Not only is her Dad worse than she let slide already Rio: well, you know Rio: Hi sis, bye sis Rio: I'm doing my best to look after her but Buster: If there's anything Buster: Call me, yeah? Rio: Yeah Rio: Got a cape? Buster: I'll splash the cash this afternoon Buster: Consider it done Rio: fit the ego Rio: oops i meant alter-ego Buster: Nah you didn't Rio: Nope 😘 Buster: I'll let you go and cancel your cards then Buster: Unless there's anything else Rio: One last thing Buster: Go on Rio: Reckon we're going to hell? Buster: Fuck that Buster: There's no god to judge us Rio: I'd like to think so Rio: so, just this once, take your word on it Buster: I won't tell anyone it's alright Buster: You can carry on letting everyone know I talk shit Rio: And who's rep are you really protecting there? Rio: Sneaky Rio: I see you Buster: You always have done Buster: Doubt yourself on whatever else you want but that's not up for debating Rio: Too right Rio: Buster I Rio: Never mind actually Rio: you can go Buster: Fuck off leaving me hanging like Buster: What? Rio: Hang on Rio: Just debating if I lie or that's even more shaming Buster: Just tell me Rio: I wanna see you again Rio: before you go Buster: I'll be there Buster: Where are you now? Rio: Sofa surfing Rio: Come get me Buster: Text me the address Buster: I'm getting in the car Rio: On it Buster: See you in 10 Rio: Hurry Rio: no don't Rio: that was a fucking stupid thing to say Rio: be careful, okay? Buster: I promise you