#when i first got to know HN better i wondered about live performances of it. like would he... sing it like that? esp certain lines

[offthewall1979]

oh ok so he...... knew. how that came off to people. i like how he didn't really answer any question here

[kuriquinn]

Penthesilea [19/20]

Cover & Disclaimer:

Chapter Summary: No one will notice if he disappears after all of this is writ into law. He is, after all, notorious, and even his own people likely want to forget that he exists. Naruto aside, there’s no one among the Senju forces left to see him as anything but a monster.

Chapter Beta: None beyond my own two eyes and at the moment. Since I’m finishing the fic this week, I’d say all edits will be forthcoming within the next few weeks as my beta has time to look through everything.

AN: Welp. We’re nearing the end. One more chapter and possibly an epilogue to go.

Sasuke wakes to the smell of antiseptic in the air and the sound of hushed voices. Somewhere to his left, Naruto’s chakra is calm and familiar, yet a sense of surprise and dismay washes over him.

“You idiot,” he rasps. His voice is raw and gravelly, and it hurts to talk. “You were supposed to kill me.”

“Well, I gave it my level best,” the other man says dryly, “but a certain healer we both know had a more convincing argument. I happen to like my head where it is.”

Sasuke opens his eyes—and he can see again and inclines his head to the left. It hurts more than he likes but he fixes the blond man with a glare. Naruto sits beside him, face covered in bandages but smirking at him nonetheless. It irritates him.

“I was meant to die,” Sasuke slowly, as if talking to a particularly stupid child. “If I live, it makes it possible for the war to continue. You’ve allowed sentiment to jeopardise that. I thought you understood.”

“Oh, I understood,” Naruto mutters. “I thought it was stupid, but I understood. Everything with you Uchiha is death and sacrifice and drama…” He waves dismissively. “You got what you wanted—the world saw me kick your ass. And then they saw Sakura show up and save it.”

Sasuke can’t find his voice at this, and can only stare at Naruto in surprise.

“Mm-hmm,” the other man nods. “The people were calling for your death, and she stepped in and said that peace should not be begin with the spilling more blood. That you’ll be tried for your crimes, and an appropriate—and useful—punishment will be found for you.”

Sasuke frowns in thought.

Exile or hard labour, most likely.

He stares up at the ceiling of the large tent overhead; in the distance, he can still hear the sound of rushing water. He thinks they must have set the tent up around him, which means his condition was serious if he couldn’t even be moved. And yet…

It doesn’t escape his notice that a certain individual is conspicuously absent. He wonders if he might have dreamed her presence before he passed out for the last time.

He has to stop himself from asking about her. Instead, he wonders, “Why can I see?”

“While she was healing you, Sakura found out you had the same thing as Itachi,” Naruto tells him. “But she knew what to do this time. And she had Tsunade-baachan and Rin helping. I’m still healing so I wasn’t much help.” He indicates the bandages on his face. “It’s a good thing she did heal you, because she found something in the process. Something about the nerves attached to your Sharingan putting pressure on part of your brain. The part that’s responsible for decision-making and rational thought. So basically, you were batshit crazy, but it wasn’t your fault.” He snorts. “Maybe that’s why you came up with such an extreme plan…oi! Sasuke! Are you listening to me at all?”

“Where is she?” Sasuke returns, finally losing the fight against asking.

Naruto’s open expression turns troubled for an instant, and then he beams. “Well, you can’t really expect her to hang around for something stupid like you, right? I mean, eyes aside, you heal pretty fast. And there’s a lot of legal stuff that needs doing that she’s responsible for now. You know she was made Tsunade-baachan’s heir a few weeks after the conclave disaster.”

“Hn.”

He was aware, but the answer doesn’t satisfy him. There is something false in Naruto’s voice that makes Sasuke’s stomach clench in dismay. He can easily interpret the truth.

Clemency aside, Sakura does not want to be around him more than necessary.

There is movement beyond the tent and then a familiar head pokes in through the flap.

“Well, you two have done it now,” Kakashi says dryly. “You know they’ll be talking about your little spat for generations.” The rest of him enters the tent. “I’m pretty sure they’re writing songs about it as we speak.”

“Hah. Just make sure they mention Sasuke’s bad hair,” Naruto quips.

Sasuke ignores him, gazing upon his former teacher. He isn’t sure how to apologise or bring up what as passed between them, and can only manage a flat, “You’ve survived.”

He doesn’t bother hiding the relief in his tone.

“Glad to see you’re feeling better,” Kakashi responds, surveying him with a critical eye.

Sasuke’s heart clenches again as he recognises the gesture as one Itachi used to perform when he thought he couldn’t see. He has forgotten over the course of the past year just how close Kakashi was to Itachi—and how grateful he once was to have the man as a mentor. He expects to face anger and repudiation for his harsh banishment of the man, but instead Kakashi’s eyes soften a little

“It seems you’re a lot more like your brother than any of us ever imagined,” he tells him quietly. “Just do us a favour and don’t try to pull something like that again?”

“I doubt there will be a need,” Sasuke says, lying back on his pallet.

“Well, about that…There’s some, er, unrest out there,” Kakashi says. “Official peace can’t be declared without the presence of the Senju and the Uchiha leaders. Which would be you, since you didn’t die and, apparently, Obito goes by Nohara now?”

He raises an eyebrow at Sasuke, who manages to remain carefully blank-faced this time. Perhaps taking note of this expression, Naruto tries to draw the older man’s attention. “Who’s officiating?”

“An emissary from the Land of Iron,” Kakashi says, naming a country that has been neutral since the first days of the war generations earlier. “Some samurai named Mifune.”

“Guess that means we have to get pretty-boy here ready,” Naruto snorts.

“He’s not the only one,” Kakashi points out. “The Uzumaki and the Hyūga are expected to be present as well.”

“Aw, shit…”

Naruto’s impending whining is interrupted as the tent flap rustles again, and Sai arrives bearing an armful of robes.

“This was the best we could find you both on short notice,” he says blandly. “Some overbearing Yamanaka woman insisted you not show up covered in each other’s blood.”

He sounds as if he doesn’t know why that would be an issue.

“Sounds like Ino,” Naruto snorts as he reaches for one of Sai’s offerings. “I didn’t know she was back.”

“She and an envoy from the Land of Wind arrived the day before yesterday, as soon as they heard the news,” Sai says. “In fact, many of the people from departed clans and from the surrounding villages have gathered.”

“It’s Sasuke’s fault…he’s been out of it for days. If you’d woken up sooner, we wouldn’t have to make such a big deal of this,” Naruto complains, while Sasuke silently accepts his own bundle of robes. He blinks in surprise when he notices that someone has taken the time to sew the Uchiha kamon onto the back and sleeves of the formalwear.

“Today is an historic event, and everyone wants to see it,” Kakashi points out. “You shouldn’t keep them waiting.”

“Yeah, yeah…though someone’s going to have to help me put this stuff on. The last time I wore montuki I was six…”

Sasuke chooses to struggle into his own, trying to ignore stiff limbs and aching bones. He suspects that he will have to get used to dressing by himself for the rest of his days, and so there is no reason to get used to someone else helping.

Sakura’s lack of presence seems even more pronounced just then, but it’s not as if he can blame her. Their last meeting before his battle with Naruto was poisonous. If she can’t forgive him, what hope does he have of the hundreds – maybe thousands – of people who suffered the ravages of this war because of him and his clan?

For the first time in his life, his feet itch to run fast and far away.

戦国時代

The valley down below the ruined waterfall teems with people. Even standing so far above them all, Sasuke finds himself overwhelmed by emotion. People cheer and cry and hold onto each other – friends and family and former enemies, wearing every colour and crest that he’s seen on the battlefield. He hears celebrations and speeches about dreams for the future and all good things to come.

Another tent has been set up on an outcropping above the valley, at the best vantage point for the people below. It is draped in the colours of the main clans and their vassals, and surrounded by representatives from each. When he and Naruto draw near, the excited murmuring goes quiet. Their eyes fly to the leader of the Uzumaki and there is awe; when their attention falls to Sasuke, it is distrust and wariness. Even the gazes of his own former vassals are cold.

He can’t blame them. If not for his grief-fuelled madness and his relentless pursuit of peace on his own terms, they might have had peace for almost a year. The rest of his clan, with the exception of Obito, might still be alive.

Sasuke clenches his fist, trying to fight down the sudden overwhelming desperation to leave. As he sees it, he has done his duty – he has ceded victory to Naruto and everyone knows it. There will be peace between the remnants of the Uchiha allies and those of the Senju, as well as their vassals. It’s a bright future – the one Itachi wanted – but not one Sasuke intends to be a part of.

No one will notice if he disappears after all of this is writ into law. He is, after all, notorious, and even his own people likely want to forget that he exists. Naruto aside, there’s no one among the Senju forces left to see him as anything but a monster.

Not any more at least.

“I know what you’re thinking,” Naruto says quietly, interrupting his thoughts. “And that’s not part of the agreement. Even if you’ve still got to go on trial, you’re supposed to get a second chance at a future, too.”

“There’s nothing left to build a future with.”

“I bet you’re wrong about that,” Naruto smirks. “And I can prove it.”

Sasuke frowns. “Whatever you think you know is wrong.”

“Oh yeah? So, there’s no one alive who you wouldn’t consider staying for?”

Sakura’s face flashes to the forefront of his mind, first the softly-smiling image he always carries close to his heart, and then the one of utter devastation that haunts his nightmares.

Chains from a failed past, he thinks grimly.

“Listen, just do me a favour,” Naruto continues. “Stick around at bit after all of this. Once we sign the treaty, there’s something you need to see. And if after that still decide it’s not enough to stay here, I’ll let you go without a fight.”

Sasuke narrows his eyes, wary, but he nods incrementally. Naruto lets out a triumphant hah, claps him on the back, and jogs ahead.

“No sense of decorum, that one,” Kakashi says appearing beside Sasuke in his usual unexpected fashion. “But he’s got a point.”

Sasuke side-eyes him, taking note of the way the man’s eyes glint in amusement. Not just at Naruto’s antics, it would seem.

“You know what he wants me to see,” he realises.

“Yes.”

“Are you going to tell me?”

“No.”

“You’re maddeningly unhelpful.”

“You deserve to stew for a bit.”

He can’t argue with that.

They cross the rest of the distance to the festive tent, where more and more of the clan representatives gather. Far down below, the crowds of people continue to swell, spreading across the fields of battle that have been littered with the dead and dying since the days of Madara and Hashirama.

“The Valley of the End,” Kakashi reminds him.

“An apt name.”

“It’s like I said. People are already turning you into legends. Are you sure you two didn’t plan this?”

Sasuke sighs and stares up at the sky, counting down the hours until sunset. “This part wasn’t planned.”

The crowd of clan representatives and witnesses part as they come through, and he can see that inside there are several sombre looking individuals. Hyūga Hiashi stands there, with his daughters on either side, and there is a young man – barely old enough to shave – loitering nearby in the colours of the Sarutobi clan. He glares about as if challenging anyone to remark on his presence there. Suigetsu is there as well, dressed in the Hozuki colours, his dead brother’s sword sheathed behind him, while the redheaded Uzumaki woman—Karin, Sasuke supposed—scowls at him across the way.

Sasuke takes up his place beside the Hyūga clan, most of whom glare at him with undisguised dislike, while Naruto stands opposite him. A serious-looking man waves for everyone to quiet down. The vassals and allies of the various clans take their places behind their respective leaders, but Sasuke notices that someone is missing.

“Where is Tsunade?” he asks. The peace cannot happen without agents from both sides.

Naruto looks sheepish. “Yeah, uh…about that…”

And that’s when Sasuke tenses.

He can sense her before she even enters the tent, with that same otherworldly awareness he has always had of her.

“Senju Tsunade has exhausted herself healing this man and is resting,” a familiar, albeit cool, voice says from behind him. “There’s no telling if she will ever wake again. But the fact that her last act was to heal her traditional enemy should tell you where she stands. As it is, before she fell into her sleep, my honourable adopted mother bestowed upon me legal agency. I am to negotiate on her behalf and on behalf of all her vassals.”

Slowly, Sasuke turns to acknowledge the speaker of these words, and when he finally sees her he feels as if he can’t breathe. He has never been one to care overly much about a woman’s looks, even after involving himself with the one facing him. And yet he can’t help be in awe by the sight of her now.

He has never seen Sakura clothed in anything other than her armour or disguised as a common villager. This figure before him is neither the warrior or the healer, but a regal politician. Her pristine white robes bear emblems of the Senju, although the obi she wears has a circle stitched into it – her own clan emblem. Her hair has been pulled back into two twists on the side of her head – not for fashion, he suspects, but to draw attention to the seal on her forehead. Finally, a gold kanzashi sits upon her crown; it’s old, he can tell, and suspects it may have belonged to a distinguished Senju ancestor.

No doubt a reminder to any who might question her status.

“I take it there have been witnesses to this granting of agency?” the samurai from the Land of Iron asks, moustache bristling in annoyance at the change to protocol.

“That’d be me,” Naruto interjects. “And before any old fogies want to bitch about needing Senju blood present for this, Tsunade-baachan and I are cousins, so kinship-wise I’ve got both the Senju and the Uzumaki covered.”

He grins, utterly irreverent and unrepentant in the face of such a serious occasion. Hinata smiles shyly at him, stars in her eyes, but Sakura’s face remains carved of marble as she stares down Mifune.

“I suppose that’s permissible,” he mutters, clearly uncomfortable.

“Then if you’re not opposed, let’s begin,” Sakura says. “The Senju wish is to sue for peace. Are the representatives of the other honoured clans in agreement with this?”

“The Uzumaki stand with the Senju,” Naruto says.

“As do the Hyūga,” Hiashi declares.

Everyone pauses, staring at Sasuke, but he ignores them. He has no intention of speaking until she looks at him, but she barely inclines her head in his direction. Despite her confident bearing and the set of her jaw, he senses apprehension. It’s clear in the way her fists move beneath her voluminous sleeves – as if they are clenching and unclenching.

“Uchiha-sama,” Mifune interrupts, voice tense. “It may simply be formality at this point, but what is the position of the Uchiha clan?”

Sasuke continues to stare at Sakura, silently requiring some sign of her acknowledgement before anything else happens. She must sense this, because slowly her gaze is drawn to his. At first, she focusses her eyes somewhere to the right of his jaw, but gradually, as if drawn by a magnet, they meet his own.

Everything beyond the two of them fades out, and Sasuke’s lungs feel too tight. The bewitching irises that were burned into his soul the first day he met her arrest him, searching him with something that is wary and tentative and hopeful all at the same time.

For a moment, they appear to find what they seek, but in that same instant she looks away, an angry flush of colour in her cheeks.

“Sasuke?” Naruto prompts.

“The Uchiha clan wishes for harmony,” Sasuke says, turning away from Sakura. “It is desired that there be peace in this land, now and into the future.”

It is as if the entire room breathes a collective sigh of relief.

“I will enter into this agreement under the condition of equal respect and trust with the Senju,” he continues. “Much of the onus falls upon those of my blood…and I will accept the consequences of my actions thereof. But the sins of the past cannot be erased either. There must be full penance from both sides before we move forward. To this end, I wish to convey the contrition of myself and my clan concerning the lives lost and pain caused. The slights we have all endured – both real or imagined – have no place in the future.”

Sakura looks back at him now, eyes calculating.

“Before any amends can be made, I would ask the forgiveness of the honourable representative of the Senju,” he concludes, “for any injuries incurred by the actions of my ancestors or myself.”

Naruto’s jaw actually drops, having not expected this. Sasuke is half in agreement, having not intended to say much today. He tries to blame the fact he is still recovering from his injuries, but when Sakura’s eyes suddenly begin to shine with something like hope, he stops trying.

“The Senju accept the apology of the honourable representative of the Uchiha,” she says quietly. “Though no words can expunge the past, we will do all in our power to build the future you speak of – and let old hatreds be buried with our dead.”

They gaze at each other a beat longer, and he feels an element of the same, unnameable force that has connected them all this time.

“Then we will now discuss the terms of this concord into law,” Mifune interrupts with a clearing of his throat. “It is hoped that from this day forward there will no longer be discord between you, but harmony and –”

A high-pitched, screeching wail interrupts Mifune’s words.

Sakura freezes, and her gaze leaves Sasuke’s faster than he can ever remember it doing. As the people gathered search for the noise – a crying child, it appears – and mumble at the inappropriate interruption, Sakura’s face flickers with a desperation he doesn’t understand.

Naruto is also suddenly uneasy.

“Sakura,” he says cautiously, although his eyes flit to Sasuke.

She doesn’t reply, instead bolting from the gathering of peacemakers.

“Senju-sama!” Mifune calls out in protest, but she ignores him, stumbling to the edges of the tent as quickly as her elaborate robes will allow. Sasuke moves to go after her, but Naruto’s hand stops him.

“It’s not what you think,” the blond man says, and is that amusement in his tone?

Sasuke’s head whips back to observe Sakura, who is reaching desperately into the crowd and – apparently – arguing with someone. He has to strain his ears to hear her.

“ – not the time, my lady –”

“ – don’t care if it’s a serious affair,” she snaps, “hand her over, she needs me!”

“ – Sakura-sama, it’s not decorous to –”

“I don’t care about decorum!”

“You can’t just –”

“I’d give her what she wants,” a blond woman standing beside Sai remarks dryly.

“Shizune, if you don’t hand me my daughter in the next thirty seconds, I guarantee you that peace will be the last thing on my mind!” Sakura growls.

Instantly a swaddled, wriggling and crying bundle is laid in her arms, and she holds it tight, making shushing noises and rocking it back and forth. The entire world has fallen away and she appears to be aware of none of it.

Sasuke can relate.

At that exact moment, everything else seems superfluous in the face of the truth he watches unfold before him.

Sakura has a child.

Sasuke’s heart clenches in his chest, and he has trouble breathing, but this time it isn’t due to awe for the woman before him. The last hopes he had of rekindling what they had dies away.

Because it has been a year, and what did he expect? That she would wait for him to come to his senses after he singlehandedly ripped apart every possible path leading to a future they could share with one another? She had people to heal and lead, and at the end of the day, she deserves to be with a man who can make her happy. He has utterly failed in this, and so he can’t even protest the gutting sensation ravaging him now.

She…deserves to be happy, he tells himself.

Long minutes of awkward whispering follow, with Sakura unable to quiet the fussing child. People are exchanging judgemental glances, and Mifune shifts in annoyance. Eventually, Sakura sets her shoulders, and stalks back to re-join the delegation, still cradling the baby. As she ducks into the tent, she bestows an expression of challenge anyone to criticise the sudden addition of crying child to the proceedings.

Sasuke suspects that it is only a general, healthy respect for what her fists can do which keeps anyone from protesting.

When Sakura’s eyes fall on his, something like dismay and apology enters them, confirming his worst fears. Then her demeanour becomes serious again and she strides forward, eyes on him and still bouncing the crying baby.

Her gaze never wavers, and it feels as if she’s using him as an anchor; he wishes she wouldn’t. The closer she gets, the more he must steel himself, refusing to look down at the child. He doesn’t want to acknowledge it or the idea of Sakura’s features blended with some other man. Instead, he does his best to meet her searching gaze without flinching.

Then she smiles a little, bouncing the infant.

“This isn’t exactly the way I imagined today would go,” she admits to him, as if they aren’t standing in the middle of stalled peace talks or being watched by the representatives of clans from both sides. As if these aren’t the first personal words she’s spoken to him in almost a year.

Or that the heart he spent his life pretending didn’t exist isn’t being shaved into a million tiny slivers as the seconds go by.

“The baby is a surprise,” he replies weakly.

She shoots him an urchin’s grin. “I imagine so.”

“Probably not as much a surprise at the other thing,” Naruto pipes up.

Sakura shoots a side glare at him. “Shut up, Naruto, this isn’t the place!”

“Oh, I don’t think there’s much choice of that right now,” he grins down at the baby. “She’s got a flare for the dramatic.”

“I suspect she comes by it honestly,” Kakashi remarks from several paces away. His visible features show no surprise, and Sasuke feels a sudden burning anger rising within.

Kakashi knew.

He and Naruto both knew about this, and they said nothing to him. And they had the gall to think he would be happy about it? And Sakura –

Sasuke knows that he has a long way to go in earning her forgiveness – perhaps he even deserves some pain for what he did to her – but this? He has never believed she would be the type to rub his face in his mistakes or remind him of that which he will never obtain.

One year can certainly change a lot, he thinks darkly.

“I suppose you’re right,” Sakura sighs now, apparently unaware of his inner turmoil. “It’s not like everyone won’t figure it out eventually.” 

“In case none of you are aware, we’re in the middle of something important,” Mifune bites out.

“You don’t know the half of it,” Naruto snorts, while Sakura bites her lip and the baby fusses louder.

“Shh, Sarada…sweetheart, don’t fuss now,” Sakura murmurs softly. “I think it’s making your father nervous.”

Sasuke instinctively looks to Naruto, expecting him speak up or joke or confirm his relationship to the child, but the blond man simply continues to laugh and shake his head as if the whole situation is highly entertaining. There is no other man around them that looks concerned for the child in the way a parent might – curious, perhaps, and possibly irritated judging from the expressions of the older delegates – but the father of Sakura’s child does not appear to be in the vicinity.

It makes sense, and his frustration must show on his face, because Sakura suddenly laughs.

“Is something about this funny?” he asks her.

“Sasuke-kun…” she sighs, shaking her head like he’s missing something. Maybe he is, because the familiar way she says his name takes his breath away. He barely notices her moving closer, putting herself and the infant into his personal space. “Would you like to hold your daughter?”

There’s an instantaneous collective intake of breath all around them, as the implication of Sakura’s words sets in. Then, everyone is talking at once – exclamations of disbelief and demands for clarification and Sasuke doesn’t hear any of it beyond the first explosion of his noise, because his own brain has stalled.

“Sasuke-kun, would you like the hold your daughter.”

Daughter.

His daughter.

“It’s not…it’s not possible…” he murmurs faintly, staring at Sakura in a silent, desperate request for explanation.

Sakura purses her lips and raises an eyebrow at him in challenge. And he knows exactly what she would say if they weren’t in such esteemed company.

Because the reality is, they were never careful. He always assumed that she was taking some form of preventative measures – after all, the battlefield is a dangerous place, especially for women. Unwanted advances are common, whether from the enemy or even amorous comrades. While it’s highly unlikely anyone could ever force themselves upon someone as strong as Sakura, it would be irresponsible of a female medic to compromise her usefulness by falling pregnant.

And yet…

Even if she was, there’s always a small chance…

In the background, Mifune tries to demand order, while the various clans and their vassals dissolve into confusion. The Hyūga seem apoplectic with shock and indignation (not Hinata, however).

“Uchiha Sasuke,” Naruto snorts. “The dumbest genius in the land—ow!”

He ducks an elbow from his redheaded cousin, who also seems unsurprised by the proceedings.  

Sakura lifts the fussing infant closer, and this time, Sasuke can’t stop himself from gazing down on her. The minute his eyes meet the baby’s, any infinitesimal shred of doubt vanishes as if it never was.

Because they are completely black.

It’s a distinctly Uchiha trait, possibly related to their dōjutsu, but Uchiha babies never have light eyes – even at birth. In addition to the inky black hair, Sasuke can already see smaller versions of his own features – nose, chin and cheekbones – and the way her face scrunches in displeasure at being held away from her mother. She appears to notice him looking down at her because she stills, and then he finds himself the subject of a direct, appraising look.

His heart stutters at the sight, because that look has been levelled at him before – first by his father, and then by his brother – only this time it’s with eyes identical to his own.

Sasuke doesn’t notice much more than that, however, because it is at this point that he promptly passes out.

つづく

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Thanks for your interest in my work!

クリ

Next Chapter

[the-cryptographer]

You may choose between Trustshipping or Angstshipping for the meme, if you'd like!

I’m sorry. If you give me two options I’m gonna probably always pick both. Hope you don’t mind :’D

Under the cut:

Isis/Seto.

What they watch during movie dates and what kind of snacks they get from concessions.

Isis is probably the one that actually likes avant gardefilm, and the most obscure foreign films, and really quiet personal dramas.Seto finds all of it utterly boring, but he tags along anyhow and, ifeverything goes according to plan, he falls asleep within the first half hour,and Isis gets to enjoy the screen, her junior mints, and Seto’s adorablesleeping face. And Seto wakes up refreshed from his power nap so it was awin-win for everyone.

Which one gets in to a fight with the other’s parents.

Everyone’s parents are so dead. But let me say Isis andMokuba get along stunningly well, but Seto and Malik are always at each other’s throats. It probably starts with mild irritation from the way Battle City wentdown, but then it starts magnifying. Both Malik and Seto are rude and failedtheir anger management classes after all, so small infringements on eachother’s space start to add up, and then eventually the worst of both of themstarts to show, and Isis becomes the battleground for their possessiveness, andnow they avoid so much as being in the same room as one another. Seto andRishid also don’t get along great, although not nearly as bad as Seto andMalik. They both make super stern faces at each other, and don’t say anything,and refuse to break eye contact for five minutes, until finally one of them hassomething else that requires their attention. And it seems to everybody theydon’t get along, but really on the inside of their head they’re like ??? andcompletely unable to interpret each other, and both of them are wondering ifthey did something to offend the other but neither can think of anything. Badat communicating bros.

What kind of street performance they’d put on to raise money if they were stranded somewhere.

Isis had the necklace in canon, of course, but I wonder ifshe’s a skilled cold-reader? I can see her being good at something like that.She recruits Seto to help her set up a stand for palm reading, and gives reallyvague but good advice and puts on a bit of a show and completely charms thepeople walking by. Seto is really grumpy about it – first of all fortunetelling is BS, and second of all Isis is totally playing up her ‘exotic’foreignness. But then Isis tells him to buzz off – what would he know aboutbeing foreign in Japan/France, or being a cave-dwelling Egyptian with anunusual phenotype, and she’s only doing this so they can afford a room for thenight so he can suck it up and be appreciative of her amazing skills pls.

How they’d be as parents if they had-a-kid/someone-forced-a-kid-on-them.

Emotionally distant parents… haha. Unplanned (or at leasthalf-unplanned) trustshipping baby is actually one of my favourite headcanons.Somehow they overlooked something obvious~Anyhow, Isis is a little better at being soft, compared to Seto, and definitelybetter at being attentive. I wouldn’t call her understanding, exactly, butshe’s not really going to hold what she doesn’t understand against you – if youget me? She’s also more physically affectionate – kisses to the brow, andwashing the kid’s hair in warm water, and sleeping cuddled next to baby. But,otherwise, they’re both kind of inclined to do the same kind of parenting jobs– handling the soft-quiet moments before bedtime, and being a unified wall ofice when they need to discipline. And, anyhow, they’re both really into theircareers, so I think they’d hire somebody to take care of the kid in themornings – feed breakfast, and pack lunch, and drive to school. They kind ofsplit the evening shift between them then.

Who would cause the most trouble during a camping trip and how.

See, unlike Seto and Jounouchi where I could imagineJounouchi dragging Seto out on a recreational camping trip (sort of) againsthis will, I can’t imagine either Seto or Isis going camping unless there wassome reason they needed to gocamping. Maybe they’re visiting some remote archaeological site, and Setocouldn’t get clearance to fly the Blue Eyes jet in. Or there isn’t a place toland the Blue Eyes jet and Isis refuses to jump from a moving plane, lmao. Ormaybe they’re stuck in virtual reality or (netherworld) Ancient Egpyt or somefantasy AU or are just stranded in the middle of nowhere after some traumaticevent? Since they are comrades in ‘can this be over already?’ they worktogether with terrible efficiency. They are neat and direct and to the pointwhile setting up camp and making meals and packing up. Neither idly causestrouble. I think the worst of it is maybe that Isis isn’t quite as athleticallyinclined as Seto, or rather her stride is much shorter, so while they’re walkingthere’s a moment where she’s exhausted and fallen quite a bit behind, andSeto’s like ‘what’s wrong? hurry up.’ And Isis, who is kind of embarrassed thatshe’s struggling is finally tired of sucking it up and is like, ‘can we restfor half and hour,’ except it’s not really a question. And then Seto is like,‘Hn,’ kind of annoyed, but they both sit so Isis can catch her breath and eatsomething.

What they would give each other as both a serious gift and a troll gift.

I think Isis likes gift giving type traditions, so she mightinsist upon it until it actually makes it through Seto’s skull. Isis puts a lotof thought into getting beautiful wood carvings and vases and other home goods,and Seto just thinks all of it is terrible trash, lol. Comparatively Seto buysher things like leather wallets and purses and dresses without thinking, andIsis actually cherishes them, lol. Eventually I think both of them happen uponbetter methods though. Seto finds the Metropolitan Museum of Art Store magazineand actually gets a clue. And Isis starts to buy him books instead – not everyone is a winner, but Seto enjoys at least half her picks so~Would- Would either of them buy troll gifts? Isis might buy Seto sillykeychains with little kites or blue eyes just for fun. But even that’s not thattrolly.

Who moves in with them as an unfortunate third wheel roommate.

MALIK.

How they feel about handholding and sudden kisses in the ear-cheek vicinity.

Handholding: no. not casually at least. Sudden kisses: inpublic – no. in private – one of the few joys in Seto’s life. Soooo, sameanswers as for JouKai. But Jou kind of is disposed towards casually touchingSeto anyhow though in a way that Isis is definitely not – ie. clasping Seto’sshoulder, pushing Seto in one direction or another, dragging Seto somewhere bythe arm. Isis and Seto are one of those couples who never touch each other inpublic at all, and you think they must be really frigid with each other in privateand are only together for cerebral reasons. But actually that’s not true atall, it’s just they’re just not… touchy-feely.

Who’s always snapping photos and who’s pack-ratting clutter.

Mokuba is the one with the camera. If it wasn’t for him andtheir other friends and the Kaiba Corp security cameras, there would be nophotographic record of either of them, lol.And Isis is the pack rat, I guess. She’s collected too much artwork and toomany artefacts and too many things from the museum store. A lot of it justspends time collecting dust in storage. It’s all very nice clutter though. Her and Seto are both very obnoxiously upperclass, so their house is all minimalist and everything in place.

Who hogs the bathroom in the morning and who causes toothpaste related drama.

Isis probably takes longer in the bathroom since she wearscosmetics and all, but I’m not sure either of them is a bathroom hog. And Isisboops Seto on the nose with a gob of toothpaste and then kisses it off and Setowas experiencing whiplash with the way he went from being furious to charmed inzero seconds.

What their matching costumes were for that one party.

They went to that one party as a couple of obscurehistorical or literary figures – so obscure even I have no idea who. Literallynobody got it except Malik, who thought it was dumb.

If I think they’d get married and why or why not.

Maaaaybe? In an emotional sense, I think Isis would want tobe married to Seto more than the other way around. I don’t think it’d be amake-or-break issue for her, but she might end up feeling him out on the topicinstead of the other way around, so long as there wasn’t an outside factorinvolved. Like, going with unplanned pregnancy, Seto might suck up hisreservations and suggest marriage first out of a sense of responsibility and I’m not gonna not give my child my name.And if immigration and citizenship became an issue that could be resolved withmarriage, I don’t think Seto would rule it out as a practical solution. Itdepends on where they’re living too – I think the name thing would likely be anissue with Isis too, but if they’re getting married in a place like Francewhere they don’t have to share a name and entry into the koseki isn’t an issue,it seems more likely. But, then, I’m not always sure these guys have a typicalkind of relationship that they’d understand through marriage in the firstplace. I don’t typically think Kaiba’s interested in living outside Japan, andI don’t typically think Isis is interested in living outside of Northern Africaor Western Europe – and there are lots of circumstances where it might happenanyhow, but sometimes I think they’re a kind of friends on the phone and acouple while in town kind of ship. I’m not sure either of them would feel theburdening NEED for a constant romantic or sexual relationship in their life, sothey might be satisfied with that kind of thing. Maybe when they’re old andhave more free time they want to be closer, so they move in together somewherein their sixties or seventies, but by that point who cares about marriage?They’ve got their own thing going on~ There are so many ways this could go…

Who has over a thousand unread emails in their inbox or five hundred icons on their computer desktop and how the other reacts to this gross mismanagement.

Kaiba more so than Isis, but their emails and computerdesktops are both disaster zones. Their actual desks are also disaster zones –paperclip explosion. They’re both kind of annoyed with each other about it, butreally they’re more annoyed with themselves about it. I think Isis catches onthe hypocrisy sooner than Seto, but they both learn quickly that attacking thestate of each other’s desk means attacking their own organisational failure so…

What their hidden artistic talents are and how appreciative the other is of these talents.

Isis encourages Seto’s singing A LOT. And Seto’s reallyembarrassed about it and secretly a little flattered.

What they consider each other’s most attractive quality and/or their favourite thing about the other.

Isis is so elegant. And it’s a perpetual mystery to Seto howIsis can manage people and be so in-charge while also not being a screamingbanshee. That Isis can get people to do what she wants while being so kind andcomposed is a crazy skill, and he doesn’t get it but he can get behind it. AndSeto’s belief in his own agency and self-worth and in his ability to be thechange he wants to see in the world and all that literally saved Isis fromdespair in canon. I don’t really think there’s anything about him that Isiscould possibly admire more given the amount of personal significance that heldfor her. Shit, I love this ship so much. This might be how you feel aboutrivalshipping. I want Isis and Seto to be friends so, so badly. He utterlysaved her, and I don’t think he even recognises or realises the inherent worthin himself for having grasped the life and the future she’d lost in his hands,and throwing it back to her. I want him to see and to know how precious andcomplete that gesture was – that he cannot be a failure so long as he’s savedsomebody. gdi, let them be friends!!!

==

==

Malik/Ryou.

What they watch during movie dates and what kind of snacks they get from concessions.

Malik’s favourite films are probably big budget actionyfilms starring overpowered ‘badass’ 2kul4skul antiheros, who walk away from the explosion at the end of the filmand drive off into the sunset. And Ryou just thinks this is the dumbest shitever. Ryou canonically likes the spooky scaries oc but, while it’s not going toput Malik to sleep, Malik does kind of go between being creeped out by horrorfilms and rolling his eyes because so fake – listen, he’s seen some shit. Youcannot even approach the level of FEAR. I think they sit through the moviesthey don’t particularly like for each other, but their favourites to seetogether are documentaries, since that’s something they both enjoy.Documentaries about the natural world, documentaries about scientificinvestigations, documentaries about weird phases in human history and culture –and there must be some documentaries out there about the history of the occult.They each buy a variety of popcorn and soft drinks and candy, and they don’teven ask before reaching over and stealing snacks from the other or drinkingusing the other’s straw.

Which one gets in to a fight with the other’s parents.

Do we know if Ryou’s dad is alive anymore? I’m pretty surehe is, and I’m pretty sure Malik wants to kill him for being a neglectfulsonnuvabitch. Ryou would, of course, prefer Malik not, but it’s a littleflattering Malik feels so impassioned on his behalf. (I mean, even without thathuge strike against him, Malik would still probably fight with Ryou’s dad.Self-centred cultural imperialist. Also vastly different personal and ethicalstandards.) And Malik probably also feels he has a bone to pick with Amane andRyou’s mom too. He curses them out one day. ‘You know Ryou is still sad aboutlosing you guys! How dare you walk out on him like this! He has better thingsto do than worry all the time about your sorry asses!’ And Ryou’s like, ‘That’senough.’ Really upset as he drags Malik away from the gravesite. (But, still,he’s a tiny bit flattered. That he means more to somebody alive than his motherand sister do dead.)

What kind of street performance they’d put on to raise money if they were stranded somewhere.

I’m really completely blanking on this one. Ryou wouldprobably try a combination of tarot reading and asking people, really politely,if they could spare some change. But I think Malik’s probably the one thatpulls out some improbable genius skill and accurately interprets what somerandom passer-by needs and draws in success by putting in half the effort. Andthen Ryou’s like, ‘wow’ and claps for him. I just don’t know what thatimprobable genius skill is.

How they’d be as parents if they had-a-kid/someone-forced-a-kid-on-them.

Malik would just be… so terrible, lmao. Not only do I thinkhe’s completely uninterested in fatherhood, there is also nobody too importantto not fade into utter insignificance in the face of his episodes. Even if hewas an ever present factor in a child’s life, he’s totally a Disneyland dad.Let’s go out and do the fun thing, but then he gets bored after that’s over andit doesn’t matter if the kid is tired/hungry/needy now – whatever~ I’m actuallytrying to think of a situation where Malik would ever be stuck parentingsomebody alone with Ryou and… it’s not pretty. Malik himself is aware he’s notcut out for this. Isis and Rishid are both aware he’s not cut out for this. Theonly circumstance I can think of is something terrible happening to both Isisand Rishid and Malik’s taking care of his niece(s)/nephew(s) bc he’s not goingto have them go into foster care and… it’s just terrible. He’s terrible andneglectful, and he knows it, and he’s cries daily about it, but he just- can’t. Ryou would be picking up all ofthe slack really, bless him, but even he can’t really bridge the gap. Ryouwould be a patient and kind father, if a little lacking in sturdiness. He patsthe children’s heads softly and makes really simple breakfasts and packs warmlunches. He asks Malik and the kids to take shifts making dinner, and to lookafter getting themselves through their daily routines. He asks like it’s afavour to him and, for the most part, nobody wants to disappoint him, but he’sstill not sure what to do when he’s met with resistance – it’s hard for him tobe firm. It’s hard when the kids come to him for advice too. Ryou is spreadthin, and those kids are gonna have to parent themselves to a large extent…In less terrible situations though, Ryou and Rishid would probably beco-parenting if somehow Malik or Ryou got a hold of a child. Rishid is a littlebetter at at least pretending to be firm, haha. If he talks at all it’s obvioushe’s made of marshmallow, but he can make an intimidating look and wait insilence until the other party cracks. And between Ryou and Rishid there is moreenergy to look after kiddos properly and direct attention away fromfaildad!Malik.

Who would cause the most trouble during a camping trip and how.

Tbh, I think Ryou would have absolutely no concept of whatto do on a camping trip. He stares at the fire starter and the packed tent forabout an hour trying to figure out how they work and the mysteries haven’trevealed themselves, heh. Ryou was also unsure how to handle a deer approaching him, and that time hefumbled the can opener and spilled all the veges on the ground, oh dear. Malikhas to take over the practical realities of camping, which he’s not too excitedabout, but it ends up being okay because Ryou holds his hand and points out theconstellations at night and the world is as it should be.

What they would give each other as both a serious gift and a troll gift.

I don’t think they give gifts often but, when they do, Ithink they try to make it special and personal. Like Malik probably thinks up areally nice gift for when Ryou gets his degree – a commissioned piece ofartwork, or some old tome about Ryou’s field of study, and also a bottle ofnice scotch. And Ryou probably does the same when Malik manages someaccomplishment with work – gets him a nice leather bag, or a flashy new helmetfor his motorbike. For troll gifts, they might give each other silly decorativehair ties, and Malik gets weird earrings, and Ryou gets silly pop astrologybooks that piss him off because it’s not properastrology, and Malik doesn’t even believe in any of this shit in the firstplace.

Who moves in with them as an unfortunate third wheel roommate.

I mean, I’m pretty sure Rishid lives with them for a whileat least. But it’s more like Ryou is the weird third wheel interrupting Malik& Rishid’s bromance, heh.Actually, I think Rishid probably grew up under the assumption that he wouldnever be allowed to have a wife or kids bc he was basically intended to be aforever slave to Malik and Isis, but then Malik was like, ‘wtf, no. you canhave a family if you want. Fuck everything dad said.’ And Rishid got !!! really excited!!! Omg, he never dreamed!!! He’sreally happy about this!!!And that all sounded fine and dandy to Malik until Rishid actually met somebodyand he realised that either (1) Rishid would have to move out, or (2) Rishid’swife would have to move in. And Malik hates both of these ideas, it isliterally the worst. How dare you ruin mylife like this, Rishid, after all I’ve done for you… So, yeah, there’s agood possibility Rishid’s wife is the unfortunate forth wheel roommate, lol.Malik will get used to it.Also, Yuugi’s not really an unfortunate roommate to have at all, but I reallylike that collection of Millennium Roommate comics and am very pro-Yuugi-hanging-out-with-these-two,so that could be really cute~But also, it should be Jou too. Yes.

How they feel about handholding and sudden kisses in the ear-cheek vicinity.

Yes, definitely, on both accounts. But holding hands all thetime. They hold hands loosely and then curl their fingertips around each otherwhen they stray too far away.

Who’s always snapping photos and who’s pack-ratting clutter.

Ryou takes photos periodically, but not in any kind ofmethodological or constant way. Everyone’s always smiling in the photos bc Ryouwon’t take frowny ones or surprise ones  :-)And Ryou’s the pack rat. He buys a lot of crystals and gift items from thestationary shop. Textbooks and manuals. Half-used pens and pencils he picked upabsentmindedly here and there. Strange leaves and rocks he found out walking.Later he runs into certain things and wonders why he has them, but herationalises he must have kept it for a reason, and so it stays.

Who hogs the bathroom in the morning and who causes toothpaste related drama.

Malik takes forever in the bath, and forever getting readyin the morning. He’s a bit narcissistic and also gotta apply that kohl. Ryou onthe other hand showers quickly and throws on wrinkly clothes in five secondsand somehow every woman he’s ever met still falls over themselves around him.And Malik is totally a toothpaste drama queen. He gets angry and squeezes toomuch toothpaste out and then eviscerates the tube and throws it at the mirrorand is just in general as FRUSTRATE about the toothpaste as he can be aboutanything. Ryou doesn’t care though because if he made a deal out of everystupid outburst? And especially an outburst where all at stake was a tube oftoothpaste and a dirty mirror? Pls.

What their matching costumes were for that one party.

Sorry. I’m again getting too lazy to try and research the kinds of details I’d want. I feel like they’d dress up as a pair from some ancient culture’s mythology, but probably not Ancient Egyptian mythology so… I’m not sure what Ryou would like, heh.But for another party, they might go dressed up as each other. Or one dresses up as the other and they both try to trick people into thinking there are two Maliks or two Ryous. haha, this seems like a kind of concept that would appeal to Ryou again.

If I think they’d get married and why or why not.

I don’t know. I get the feeling either Ryou would be reallyfor it, or really against it – for a reason that’s more ideological than personal– and then Malik would be like ‘sure’ either way. Ryou has a whole speech abouthow marriage exists as a societal institution and why it is or isn’t importantfor them to get married as a gay couple and Malik’s like ‘sure’. ‘Sure.’

Who has over a thousand unread emails in their inbox or five hundred icons on their computer desktop and how the other reacts to this gross mismanagement.

Ryou’s the one that’s more attached to his computer, but Idon’t think he has more than a dozen desktop icons, or thirty or so unreademails. It’s very whatever. Malik has fewer emails, but he’s ignoring the onesfrom Isis’s work about how he needs to do this or that for the museum. Ryouscolds him about this.

What their hidden artistic talents are and how appreciative the other is of these talents.

Malik might be musically inclined. He knows how to play thequanun and guitar. Also, if it can be considered an art, Malik’s really good atdoing literary translation work. Ryou’s pretty impressed on both accounts. Hegets a little blown away by Malik’s casual genius.And Ryou’s pretty crafty. He might do carving or wood burning – he made all theMonster World figurines himself, yes? Malik likes looking over his shoulder andwatching the process. They both find it soothing.

What they consider each other’s most attractive quality and/or their favourite thing about the other.

I don’t know how to explain. They’re both really straightforward in different ways. I think they like what they perceive as the honestly and simplicity in the other, compared to how they, themselves, feel deceitful. There’s something really earnest in Ryou’s kindness and demeanor and passionate love of his hobbies, and there’s something really earnest and simple in Malik being able to voice what he wants - a significant amount of which is completely normal stuff like not wanting to be hoarded underground? I think they’re drawn to that in each other. Along with a kind of… underutilised intelligence they see in each other? Ah, I’m just rambling inarticulately now. Meme over. Thank you for your ask!!

[douchebagbrainwaves]

LOTS OF PEOPLE STARTING STARTUPS

We expected to divide them into two categories, promising and unpromising. But he insisted it was good enough, but if you have hot prospect, either close them now or write them off. But remember that ramen profitability is a trick you could use for YC is a steam catapult, at least, not here that this is hard to bear. This imbalance equals opportunity. I can imagine what I'd tell them about it. It doesn't matter if they underestimate you because of some mistakes they made in 1200, you just stall. No, you can't do as well before or after. Outside of math there's a limit on the number of startups is that they're telling the truth. It varies depending on what you're saying, or at best a way to start a startup is to maximize the amount of spam that spammers send, they can change the world, including China. But that disobedience is a byproduct of optimizing for depth and speed. And yet by the next afternoon the exit poll numbers online corresponded to the returns.

If you're surrounded by colleagues who claim to enjoy work that you find you can do to decrease the standard deviation of the outcome. Hacker, and in someone's trash I saw what appeared to be a high school kid writing programs in it. Perhaps the absent-minded professor is wise in his way, or the startup will get acquisition offers. We now have several examples to prove that. When I think how hard PR firms work to score press hits in the traditional way: they have to say yes or no, or the detective thriller you wrote under a pseudonym? And so they'd make the wrong choices. There was a point in your life. It would have been harmful. Apple tablets have accelerometers in them. Your performance can be measured in the gross of the movie. It's easy to start, it will be very conspicuous.

It's hard to say what you mean and say it briefly. And Wufoo got valuable feedback from it: Linux users complained they used too much Flash, so they did. Recursion existed as a mathematical concept before Lisp of course, is that you actually become a better investment. What a wonderful thing, to be bound by some plan you made early on. They were the kind of single-minded, though they draw the line at 20%. For a given total amount of desirable startup stock available to investors will probably increase the number of transactions. What would it even mean to make theorems a commodity? By far the biggest killer of startups that could succeed fail because the founders were terribly overworked. If you're sure of the general area you want to start a new company that grows fast. They've tried hard to seem professional.

0. They may be surprised how big the numbers get. Brandeis was a product of unusual circumstances. The middle class were a new, resistant strain of bugs. Now even the poorest Americans drive cars, and they're clearly it. But this isn't true. One cooperative project that I think of the first 10 employees you'll have almost as much. For example, initially I thought maybe this principle only applied to Internet startups.

Morgan was to the customers. Popular magazines made the period between the spread of smallness began: in the middle of the range. Their lawyers are generally inexperienced too. Really, it's Apple's fault. Most startups that raise money do it more. Suits, who don't know one language from another, and though perhaps this is wishful thinking they seem to have held true to their original principles. What happened to Reddit won't inevitably happen to HN. Startups are more like a fickle novel buyer than a wise and perceptive magistrate—the more you spend, the easier it is to be a nice way of saying they need someone to tell them that you'd be doing them a favor by letting them stay in Nebraska.

While you're at it, and there's something very pleasing about small things. It was natural to have this happen. It doesn't seem like work, the number of Indians in the current batch have the. Programming languages don't exist in isolation. So if you can. The venture business in its present form is only about forty years old. That should correct the problem. Actually I'm less American than I seem. Not all cities send a message. Someone who was strong-willed is not enough, however.

The way you get taught programming in college would be like if people could think that well at work. I realized that what I'd been unconsciously hoping to find there was back in the matter, if you have what it took to make the team, and his sales down: his bandwidth usage would go through the motions. Startups often pay investors who will give 200k to a startup—so important that it's almost cheating to append it like that—because once you get going, just as the mid seventies. When I say there may only be a few stars who clearly should make the team, and his place to be if that one thing is what you're trying to raise their kids well. But just two companies, InVision and L-3. That is the pattern for the future. The problem is, as far as I can tell you the most revenue the soonest. For example, the idea you have now won't be the last you ever raise. Never frame pages you link to, or we may have to decide. A big company that understands what hackers need is Microsoft.

But usually evidence will help. What are people doing now, using inadequate tools, that shows they need what you're making. For founders that's more than a week ahead. So if you're going to have nearly the pull with the spam recipient as the kinds of sales pitches that they do is related to the parentheses. But they usually let the initial meetings stretch out over a couple weeks living what is, for the right sort of person who would like to avoid making these mistakes. Like all illicit connections, the connection between wealth and power. I know. That's less the rule now.