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harrysrealgf · 2 years

Text

CINEMA

frat!harry x reader

summary: you and harry go watch a movie in theaters and rumors start going around in your college.

warnings: smut, 18+, slight sexual assault, public(ish) sex

--please be nice, I don't know how I feel about this bc I don't like writing smut!

—————————🌷🌷🌷—————————

Harry was a stereotypical frat boy. He practically fucked the whole school. You still thought he was cute. You had to pretend you hated him though.

After you told your friends you thought he was cute they all said the same things, “He just wants to fuck,” or “He has 300 different STDS,” He was super cute and your friends couldn't deny that. He wasn't even cute, he was drop-dead gorgeous.

If he hadn't fucked almost the entire population of the school, you would fuck him.

You were in class and of course, you got teamed up with him for a project.

“Y/n and Harry,” your professor announces.

“Who's that?” He questions.

Your teacher points to you and you put your head down.

He taps his friend's arm with the back of his hand and smirks.

“Dudeeeee,” you whispered with your head still down.

After class, Harry came up to you.

“So, can we go to y’dorm?” he looked at you with lustful eyes.

“Oh absolutely, wouldn't want to sit on your cum stained, STD infested bed.”

“Y’wish your cum was stained on m’bed,” he sneered. “but just so y’know, I don't have STDS. I got tested last weekend.” He mocked.

“Mhm. And what does that say about you that you had to get tested?” You joked.

He rolled his eyes playfully, “Can I get y’number though? Y’know so we can talk about the project.” He grinned.

“Yeah.” you gave him your phone.

—————————🌷🌷🌷—————————

Harry: hey ;)

Y/n: don't do that

Harry: sooo can I cum over 2nite ;)

Y/n: ummmmmm if my roomies ok w it!

Harry: u shuld make sure she's not there 2nite

Y/n: kk

“Ally!” You called your friend you were blessed to have her as your roommate too.

“Hey!”

“Guess who’s number i got?” You bit your lip.

“Justin Timberlakes?” She joked

“Harrys.”

“Ooh shocker.. You know he just wants to get in your pants?”

“No its for a project.” You corrected her.

“He still wants to get in your pants,” She giggled. “He tried to get in mine,” she said softly.

“Okay, but he's so hot.” You smiled.

“You do you hon.”

“Well, could you make sure you’re not here from, tonight to tomorrow?” She fake smiled.

“Actually yes I could, but make sure his dick doesn’t get anywhere near my bed.”

“Will do!”

—————————🌷🌷🌷—————————

There was a knock at your door. You got up from your bed and closed your laptop.

You opened the door to see Harry.

“Hi.” he says.

“Hi.” you move out of the way for him to walk in. “So my roommate says not to get your dick on her bed,” you shake your head. “But I told her nothing was going to happen.” things got awkward, fast.

“I mean...” he grinned.

You hit his chest. “Harry.”

“I'm jus’ saying! Y’are very beautiful... And a little birdie told me that y’thought I was cute...” his finger grazed over your lip. You were so close to giving in.

“N-no. H, no.”

“H?” he repeats. “I like that.” he bit his lip.

“Harry no stop.” you removed his hand from your face.

“I'm not gonna be one of these girls you fuck and forget about. We're here to do a project and that's it.” you walk and sit on your bed.

“Y’not one of those girls though.” he followed her to her bed and sat beside her.

“Then prove it. You didn't even know who I was.”

“Fine. Go on a date with me.” he sounded so serious but you knew he wasn't.

It took you a while to process that. “What?”

“Please. I know you like me ‘nd... I wanna take y’on a date.”

“You don't even know me though,” you said softly

“Then let m’get to.” you nodded.

“Fine. When?”

“Tomorrow at 8.”

“Where?”

“The movies?”

“What movie?”

”The Titanic’ is in theatres again... Wanna watch that?” he was serious.

“Sure..” you sounded unsure with your answer but you didn't believe him.

“Then it's a date.” you nodded. You smiled slightly. You just couldn't believe it.

—————————🌷🌷🌷—————————

The day went by very fast, and before you knew it, it was time for your date.

Harry came and picked you up from your dorm. You and he were dressed casually.

I'd been like 20 minutes into the movie.

His hand went on your thigh slowly and you wanted to tell him to stop, but you didn't. He started to go up more and more until he was slightly touching your clothed core.

“Harry stop,” you speak softly. You weren't sure if you actually wanted him to stop.

He starts to rub you slightly.

“H.” you whisper. He still doesn't stop.

You slap his hand and stand up.

“Y/n, come on. Sit down.” he whispered.

You rolled your eyes and walked out.

You waited in the lobby for someone to answer your call.

Harry came out of the theatre and came up to you.

“Y/n I'm sorry.” he apologized

“Go away.”

“Please y/n. Let me take y’to your dorm.”

“That's the least you could do.”

You got into his car and he drove you back to the dorms.

Before you opened the door to get out he stops you.

“I'm sorry y/n. I like y’and I was just scared. I haven’t been in a real relationship since like middle school.” he really did sound sincere but you didn't believe him

“Whatever.” you leave the car and slam the door shut.

The next day everyone was looking at you weirdly. You instantly thought of Harry and he probably said something about you.

And you weren't completely wrong.

“Is it true?” some girl came up to you.

“Is what true?”

“You sucked off Harry at the cinema?”

“What?” you felt betrayed. “Who's saying that? Because its a not true.”

“Harrys telling everyone.”

A random frat came up to you and said “Me next?” he made the hand gesture of sucking.

You rolled your eyes and went to finish your day.

After the day you went to go look for harry.

You found him in an empty classroom almost looking like he was waiting for you.

“What the fuck are you doing telling people I sucked your filthy cock?”

He smirked at your dirty mouth.

“Don't know what y’talking about.” he lied.

“No, what is wrong with you?! Just because I wouldn't let you touch me in a public movie theatre gives you no right to make up rumors about me. Now I have multiple people coming up to me, giving me dirty looks, just because you think if stoop down that low to have your std-infested cock in my mouth.” you finished. Harry hasn't fucked anyone in weeks since he met you. He liked you a lot and he was just scared he wasn't lying but he didn't have to do it like that.

“If y’weren't such a goddamn bitch all the time I wouldn't have to.”

“You didn't have to in the first place!” you scoffed and rolled your eyes. “I fucking hate you.”

“Y’hate me?” he got closer to you. “Y’hate me?” he let out more sternly.

“Yes,” you said certainly.

“Fine, hate me all y’want. But I want you t’remember this the next time y’decide you hate me.” he kissed you deeply. You actually really enjoyed it. Maybe it was all this pent-up sexual frustration you had in you, or maybe it was just the fact you still liked Harry, but you didn't want him to stop.

You kissed him back and he removed your jeans and then your panties.

“I could feel y’getting so wet for m’at the movies, poor baby was just humiliated... Weren't you?” you nodded.

“I haven't fucked anyone since we started this project weeks ago. Y’know that right?” you shook your head. He removed his skinny jeans and boxers.

He put two fingers in you as you moaned. He put you on a table and fingered you more.

“Fuck, H.”

“Y’still hate me, baby?”

“So fucking much.” you moaned. “Fuck I'm gonna cum... H please more.”

“Y’want more fingers or m’cock?” he teased

“Y-your...” you moaned as you were about to cum. He could feel you clinching around his fingers and pulled out.

“My what?”

“Your cock... Please,” she says shyly.

“Hmm...” he thought.

“Please, Harry. I want your cock so bad.” she whimpered.

“What a good girl y’are. Begging for m’cock?” he shook his head.

He slowly entered his cock into you. He moaned as he did it faster.

“Oh God.” you were moaning because it felt so good, but hearing Harry moan made something inside you go crazy. You loved men who were loud in bed (even if we were in a classroom and not a bed)

“Y’cunt is so pretty.” he moans again “Prettiest pussy v’ever fucked.” you grunted madly.

“Because all you do is fuck sluts.” you said annoyed as he pounded into you harder.

“Should I have been fucking y’this whole time instead?” he bit his lip.

“Yes. It's so good.” you moaned.

“Yeah? Who's making y’feel this good hmm?” he teased.

“You.” you squeal.

“And who am I?” he licks his lips

“Harry.” she tries

“Try again.” he snickered

“D-daddy...”

“That's fucking right. Still hate me?” he asks while she whimpers and moans under him.

“Depends...”

“This is my fuckin pussy. Understand? No one else can fuck it but me.” she moaned louder.

“O-only if th-thats my cock.” she squeals. “Fuck I'm gonna come daddy.”

“Me too. Cum on m’cock baby.” she moans louder.

She cums on him and he pulls out and cums on your stomach.

You sat up “Th-thank you, H.”

“Anytime, just uh-- give me a call. And I meant what I said by the way. I really do like you, m’just not used to relationships.” he said putting his pants back on, and so did you.

“Is anyone in here?” a janitor said. The door was locked so she couldn't come in.

You and Harry look at each other and laugh.

#harry styles #harry styles x y/n #harrys house #harry styles x yn #harry x reader #harrystyles x reader #kyle spencer x reader #Spotify

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udunie · 4 months

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in your sdv fic obsessed with the way Harvey’s given Sebastian a reputation as a dirty slut that he’ll never be able to shake. pondering the way he might feel when he hears the story/him maybe not even trying to refute it because what actually happened is kinda worse and maybe does make him a dirty slut. things being done to him justified by keeping him from gagging for it elsewhere and maybe he’s refuting it in the moment but if he does get them to let him go he’s so horny that he goes back to them afraid that without them he will start doing that type of thing and hurt people he cares about. it’s so good to think about

same asked about sdv fic you’re probably not going this route but what if slimes through his esophagus makes it harder for him to talk and with enough repetition completely mute. they could tell him that it’s worrying how birthing the slimes had changed his digestive system and they feared it wouldn’t work at all unless he had slime colonies constantly breeding in there. he could even return home to his basement newly friendless and light sensitive and maybe even grounded if people talk to Robin right and maybe get more acquainted with Demetrius’s home setup. Demetrius seems to me less understanding of uncooperative subjects than Harvey. maybe Linus hears about the std and talks to Harvey and is either roped back in or tested and reassured he didn’t get a std from that nasty slut.

Oh yeah, he will NEVER wash of the stigma Harvey just fucking casually put on him. Like, I love stardew valley, but if you think jodi and caroline wouldn't fucking ostracize him (and make everyone else did it too) you're just plain wrong lol

Pierre wouldn't want him in the store - it would scare away the customers. Gus wouldn't want him in the saloon - you can't have someone with a habit of catching infectious diseases anywhere near food, of course. We all know what Lewis thinks about the 'youth' and this would just confirm it. Clint would constantly harass him to make sure he's never anywhere near his precious Emily. Haley would feign throwing up whenever he saw him in the street, Abigail would feel cheated and disgusted that he'd led her on while fucking men on the side... Sam would probably be the only sympathetic person in theory, but he's a good big brother, he has to make sure he doesn't bring anything home that could hurt his little brother, you know.

Basically he wouldn't be welcome anywhere in town...

If he ever gets out of the clinic in more-or-less one piece, he will not really have anywhere left to go??? It would probably be much, much better for him not to get out of there...

(I actually had this... half-formed idea for the end, where the wizard gets involved??? Like, he keeps an eye on Pelican town for sure, so he would find out about their efforts. He wouldn't be concerned by ethical implications, but he would offer his services in an exchange. Harvey and Demetrius would help him breed some prismatic slime - using the jelly he got form the farmer - and he would use the Dark Shrine of Memory to delete Sebastian from the memory of everyone in town except for him, Harvey and Demetrius...)

#prompt box

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astrophileagain · 1 month

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texts i wish i could have sent

- [ ] 10/30

there’s no nice way to go about it so i’ll just start

i don’t think we should see each other anymore

the red flags i tried to ignore are ones i’ve learned to accept and it doesn’t make me a happy.

to start

you have always affiliated me as some gross party girl because i did what any normal 21 year old used to do at 22- party and drink. yet my body count has been only 3 and youre the one who gave me an std. how can it be my fault when i regularly get tested was regularly seeing you and youre excuse “i been had it”. i was even nice enough to ease your mind and say sure ill take half the blame but you would have never found out unless i gotten tested.

you say you hate a woman that brings up old stuff yet you normally bring up the passing of your dog and once brought up the ER shorts situation. Both which you falsely recalled. I didn’t know you when your dog passed, and i never asked you to come get me cause i was uncomfortable

i’m constantly left on seen and when we’re together you are constantly on your phone- even when you drive

every trip we been on i planned im confident enough to say most every date we been on i’ve planned and or payed

2 years. I’m no where near your girlfriend. Why should i keep waiting. Your excuse is you’re not the man you want to be yet. that’s fine, but i don’t even see the effort.

You don’t make me feel beautiful, you don’t give me reassurance. I’m just a girl you go eat with, have sex with, and hang out with after 10. i try to have conversations with you, ask you what romance is to you tell you i’m proud of

you. i’ve never heard you even say anything positive about me not fucken once

You make jokes about meeting your family yet every family affair i know you’ve gone too i’ve never been brought around.

my birthday. you’re response “i asked you multiple

times” really? you asked once. maybe twice. last year you texted me right at midnight and even picked me up. it doesn’t make sense.

i try to make myself important to you when im not at work or doing things

i always keep you in mind to give you some of whatever i cook

always make my parents aware your the man im with and hype you up

always remind you im here with open arms

it feels like you just hate me and when i ask you for time it’s a burden to you

you make me feel bad for not sleeping over even though you know i’m punctual about work

you say you can’t find the friend in me that’s so insulting i’m always there when you call when you want to hang when you need something i’m down for all the things you want to do but i guess im not a friend

you’re sweet when you want to be but i need a man who’s sweet to me all the time.

i need to accept im not the woman you want. you say you know what your willing to put up with” do you? do you really? i been nothing but amazing to you and you still have reason to complain, your occasionally nice to me

i have reason to complain, just swallow the truth.

i have a lot of my own issues and i feel like i can’t bring it up cause then i have this gut feeling you’ll just leave cuz you don’t wanna deal with too much

like yea who fucken does but you won’t bring peace to the table either i’ve learned that

like when we’re together and you’re on your phone like mad crazy but can go days without talking to me

- [ ] 11/14

or when you just have too much pride n can’t comfort me makes me feel like you genuinely don’t want me like it cost you nothing to say some nice things here and there

u just think i’m dumb financially

comments about me not going to the gym like i get it i’m not skinny enough for you or they body you want you’ve mad that so clear with your condescending comments

i get being busy/tired. like i completely understand. but .. if you could also be understanding to the fact that it makes me feel incredibly bad im just as busy then i check my phone to see like not one word from u but i guess you’re just too busy🤷🏻‍♀️.

i don’t mean to catch you off guard or anything but i been thinking on whether we should continue this..

i have no idea what’s happening to us or what’s going to happen. and if you’re not in it or even willing to be, then it’s not fair to me for me to exist only at your convenience. hearing you say you weren’t sure if you saw a future with me broke my heart. cause the whole time i did n i feel so led on. so i hope you understand the pain im feeling. cause i really don’t want it to end but i can’t force you, i can’t make you, and i wouldn’t want you to feel that im pressuring you too.

in my lifetime i wanna be treated like a girlfriend and asked to be one cause i’ve never had that, and it’s been 2 years already, no disrespect but it’s silly

i know what i want too. i said what i wanted to say and maybe not all of it that night but i’ve explained to you that i do put in a lot of effort maybe too much, i take accountability for the times i could have been better too

sorry for this hope work is good to you today hopefully not a crazy day

We’ve never exclusively defined us. I have been faithful and committed this whole time, with no reassurance from your end about you doing the same until just now. This is why I think a label was important because whole time I’m acting out my role and going above and beyond.

You telling me you been locked in is reassuring and that’s kinda what you don’t normally give me. It’s rare that you reassure me. I never ask you for 24/7 anythint. My job on your sideline is to just support you and hope we have a day off together. All the couple like things we do i initiate and im glad you recognize it because we should be sharing that weight. But if we are able to hang out i have to drop what im doing cause who knows when i’ll see you next and it feels like i just chase.

You said it yourself. You don’t know if you see me in your future, you don’t think you have a friend in me. As I mentioned over the phone, that’s really confusing to me. You say you wanna be there for me but when I opened up in the past I go right back to bottling it up.

I think in this moment I just need a mental break.

I think in the moment I need to put myself first.

way to make sure I’m trying to make you happy and although i don’t always succeed in that i continue to try. it’s clear i feel for you more than you feel for me.

I tell you I’m proud of you, tell you how hard working you are, I remind you how handsome you are, i support the paths you consider taking career wise. I always respond n im always willing to be there when you ask. i don’t feel like i hear you say positive things about/to me. i only get it when i express im feeling down. if im being honest you just don’t sound like you care if i stay or go, that’s really worries me.

You’re telling me you can’t give me what I want. I never asked you for the world.

We don’t see each other often, and I go out of my way to do couple type things because I want our time together to be meaningful and memorable. Yea our time is memorable still -when we don’t do those things- but you can also agree that neither of us get out the house much for fun things. That’s why I wanted to go on the trip- all we do is work.

It’s the small efforts I ask.

In the end I will always support you and cheer you on no matter what. Whether I’m in your life or not.

I want to work things out. I hope you can understand why I asked if you wanted to continue this, it’s because i feel lost and confused . i’ll always wanna work towards something more with you. It wasn’t a threat, or an attempt to start an argument. i like when we can talk things out and not result with an argument.

at the moment though, I just need a mental break.

Yea it’s a dumb question, it’s a dumb question that means a lot to me. It’s not about that completely. I go out of my way to make sure I’m trying to make you happy and although i don’t always succeed in that i continue to try.

I tell you I’m proud of you, tell you how hard working you are, I remind you how handsome you are, i support the paths you consider taking with your career. I always respond n im always willing to be there when you ask. i try.. it seems like you just don’t sound like you care if i stay or go

You’re telling me you can’t give me what I want. I never once asked you for the world. just small amount of effort… when do i get those words of affirmation in return?

I go out of my way to do “couple things” because I want our time together to be meaningful and memorable. Yes our time is still memorable when we don’t do those things but you can also agree that neither of us get out the house much for fun things and we don’t see each other often. That’s why I wanted to go on the trip- all we do is work.

In the end I will always support you and cheer you on no matter what. i’ll always want to work towards something more with you.

at the moment i wish my head could stop being filled with thoughts, i want a mental break.

- [ ] 11/30

tired of feeling like all i do is fucken bother you

i promise i won’t bother U no more

. i’ll just shut the fuck up about everything from now on.

- [ ] 12/6

i feel so terrible

like i mean nothing

ever since i brought up wanting more it’s like he actively removed himself from making time with me

i can’t help but feel there’s another woman he’s talking too. i am not trying to be accusatory but what other reason would it be that he would want so much space from me and never tell me who he’s with. i don’t think im being irritation all

he doesn’t call he don’t make plans won’t even tell me sweet things anymore…

i don’t know whats wrong with me. to the point he don’t even check on me like he can’t afford to wanna be there for me.

i can’t go to him, cannot rely on him. it’s confusing

“wanting a supporting gf” while he gets where he wants to be. i get that and partially stupidly agrred to do that, but the fact that i never got asked and the fact that i receive no support in all of it either. not even verbally. he just expects me to have it all together too. i need some space. it makes me wake up 10 time thru the night and i can’t ever sleep. i laugh. all he wants is peace yet he brings nothing but pain.

11:46 he still hasn’t said a word to me. i think, i think im afraid i should ghost first but whats the point. why cant it work? i dont think it will. if another woman is filling my shoes, he should feel bad. i’m trying. he doesn’t support me and wants me to continue to please him . i hate this dynamic. i had a weird feeling since yesterday. like just say something… you’re slow lol.

i want to text him that im done. i’m just done. how many times do i need to ask? but this is irrational, like a whole day? not a single thing? who are you with…. then i find out your following some girls spam account that obviously flaunts her body all over social media. well what if i did that? i can’t help but wonder when im going to be asked to be a girlfriend when am i gonna matter when am i gonna be treated good is this just a test is he just a lesson is he ever gonna get it together

who is he sleeping with and getting tested and then seeing me to make sure he doesn’t get caught again idk i can only have my doubts at this point

i think im gonna send this

i dislike it when you pretend as if i’ll get to see you ( even if it’s just to spend a little time together) meanwhile you’re totally aware i won’t get any of your time

i respect you having plans elsewhere im not entitled to any of your time but be upfront. i sat by the phone thinking maybe he’ll text me if he’s up for it

really- it hurt my feelings. please don’t play with my feelings like that. it’s retarded that i have to ask.

it’s been on my mind all day. i’m not looking for an argument. i’m just really tired at this point and had a bad day at work n the last thing im trynna do is take it out anywhere i know im better off asleep

hope your days better than mine and work is easy on you. i’m off to bed goodnighty

really i feel like such a burden to you

i won’t bother you with anything anymore

i tried my best to say how i feel instead of bottling it up but i know it for sure ruined your day so just ignore me per usual

just feels like we’re falling apart and you’re totally ok with it everytime i try to explain how i feel it’s like it worsens everything it’s just the same old same old no one bothers to hear me out

sorry if that came out blunt but i am trying my best to say how i feel and not bottle up but that’s how i feel this isn’t the first time you mis lead me as if you know im always available to you just feels like continuous playing with my feelings

oh i always go on night walks but i know you work and don’t want you up at 5 am with me especially if you go off the night like 1 am

Yea your right you never said yes. I understand but “pmu” jokingly it happens so often i don’t think you realize how often

i was at home like ready to go with my shoes on waiting for a response to the “really” text thenyou to go silent . that’s what im talking about. not necessarily costco .takes 2 seconds to say sorry kari im not up for it im w my friends etc .

how can i explain like im a mouse and your a cat and you just push me back and forth and back and forth idk how to explain it

my point is i dont ask for your time for things like “a simple walk” because 90 percent of the time you don’t think im worthy enough of your time it’s like why do you think i should continue to ask when the answer i get from you is silence or no

i go on a night walk 3 nights out of the week

we have gone on hikes n sorry i work mornings like that n don’t have set sched so i can’t always go

but it’s not like you’re making the plans either.

this is funny to me because like i could say the same - what about things i like. do you know of things i like? i go on short walk after work by myself a few times a week- but you’ve made me afraid to ask you for time cause i know the answer is no

sometimes if i have extra money i’ll take a pilates class. did you know besides “running errands” i like to take a pilates class

do you think i want to go to costco and also stand in a long line? no i dont but i was already planning on going and thought to be considerate to see if you’d wanna join to grab something you might need. the whole point was the “pmu” don’t say it if you dont mean it that’s really all it is. not about the cont

painting, painting, painting, painting, making playlists/music, walking at my park, cooking, going to the track, yoga, sometimes i scrape up extra money for pilates or a dance class if i can afford it. i read a lot, listen to audiobooks too. i like museums, site seeing at those. i like learning, always wished i would’ve minored in astronomy or physics. i like seminars of that, even a youtube ted talk will suffice.

just because they’re not always physical activities doesn’t make them less valuable to me.

how do you think it felt when i made you a playlist and asked for one in return and you just said “yea im not the type to just sit there and make one” well im not always the type to do certain things too but if my partner asked for me to venture out/ try it im open to it. just hate bringing it up, cause i get rejected and i can only handle so much rejection.

you have no agenda to care for me so instead i will do you the favor and remove myself completely from your life. i bet you posted 10x over the past 2 days, bet you texted your group chats 10x and i bet there’s other stuff on your phone and socials you partake in that really- i don’t want to know about. it’s not fair that i seen you go thru relationships on socials and made them your gf in a matter of months AND you’ve told me you have as well. While i sit here and been nothing to you for over two years. you’ve made it clear verbally and through your actions that you see no future with me or care for my existence at all.

i hope my absence brings you nothing but peace. and i hope you better yourself

enjoy today with your cousin not sure if that was a lie or not since you have lied to me in the past about your whereabouts.

don’t sweat me leaving too much, it was your decision. and don’t forget to get tested regularly- don’t want another woman being treated the way i was. take care.

you assume i like to drink because that’s all you knew of me BEFORE you knew me. i still can’t believe you stand by that assumption about me because in the 2 years i’ve been with you- i don’t go out the way i used to. at most it’s brunches.

maybe you just didn’t hear me because i’ve brought all my interests up before… yea we have differences. but for example if i hated hiking- i would still do it because you wanted too, because i care about you and i know it’s a good time when we’re together. i guess i just thought you would be open to do things i like too.

as for the sleepovers i’ve been dying for you to ask me. but you don’t because you made the assumption that i hate it. when i said i only am uncomfortable when i have work at 8 AM and i have a fear of rolling up late to work, because i can’t afford to lose my job over attendance. i wanted you to be understanding of that. i am a punctual person. you tell me to somewhere at X time and im 10 minutes early that’s just who I am.

my only message to you was that please don’t have me waiting on edge because if you say to pick you up im readily available to make time for that. but i can see now that bringing up how i feel- causes you to completely ghost me for like 3 days now? 2? idk. i went to a bridal shower this weekend. and the whole time im internally suffering at an event i shouldn’t be because you wanted to not talk to me. you shouldn’t be afraid to talk to me. i won’t ghost you or not provide you with any info i have.

i agree. i feel disconnected but it’s not something we can’t work thru. i think you and i both make assumptions about one another instead of addressing each other directly. wish i wasn’t ghosted for nearly 3 days but i understand being someone who needs time to collect their thoughts. i def would have appreciated a text saying you’re not ghosting me you just need time because i’ve felt sick to my stomach all weekend about this n felt like i couldn’t truly be with my family on sat.

i have mentioned all those interests of mine in the past. so it broke me a little inside just now to read that was allll news to you.

i personally believe you view me as a “drinker” because that’s all you knew of me BEFORE you knew me. which yes i was going out a lot at the time . but in the 2 years we’ve been together i haven’t gone out like that because i don’t see the reason to anymore unless you’re out with me.

With the exception of brunches/get together for family/friends bdays. you need to let go of that idea of me. theres also an assumption that i hate sleeping over. never have i said that. maybe the assumptions was made bc im punctual about work and my time - that i dislike being over, when really i love being with you and sleeping next to you . punctual is just who i am. so if i open at work i rather be home already since im up and out the door 5 AM sometimes 6 AM. i feel bad cause then i have to wake you up super early to walk me out and i hate that because your usually deep in sleep at that point. and idk if its okay for me to go out by myself like im just not sure. if i dont have work im more than excited/ happy to sleep over. i dont hike the way you do because i cant always go in the AM and sometimes when im off its already dark im not a pro like you but i like going. and if i was someone who truly HATED hikes, i would still go if it meant something to my bf because i wanna spend the time w him and he likes it, i guess i just thought you would’ve done the same for me.

hope your days good too love you

so heartbreaking that you can go all day updating your stories, texting other back i bet - and honestly god knows wat else you are doing without my knowledge

and then me the pain in your ass is here at home just sick to my stomach over a guy who won’t claim me or even bother to fix our problems. you don’t even like me i guess, saying you love me just has to be a lie. i should’ve know from the beginning, esp when you said your life’s more peaceful without me on socials- i just can’t believe you. it’s my fault for being so stupid and believing you believing that you care when you don’t i’m stupid

listen - we should just split up. because im tired of your lies. in your eyes you’ll be happy that im gone. good thing you didn’t bring me around i guess. less of a hassle.

the problem is so much bigger. you don’t love me. if you did i wouldn’t be just your little side piece. why do i have to be your quiet hidden gf who supports you while i get no benefit in return. all day i bet you’ve posted and texted your chats and god know what else you do without my knowledge. im stupid, for me to be okay for so long being hidden from your socials and family, to never be actually claimed. im stupid, im stupid for believing you. i guess this is me breaking it off because i want a man that cares about me. sorry for wanting the bare minimum. sorry for wanting to work out our issues. i know the next going to get everything i wanted from you.

take care, i hope my absence brings you nothing but peace. now you can relax and do all the things you find fun and interesting

i can say i truly did love you, i loved you more than you say you did, i love you still but you don’t treat me right. i know i love you because i’ve been crying all day trying to find the courage to send this.

i cant believe you once said you saw me having your kids to fast forward you see no future with me all cause i wanted to talk thing .

if you can leave my window trim outside and i’ll just pick it up. don’t leave anything else or don’t leave it i don’t care abt it i guess . have a blessed holiday. i love you. bye bye .

behaviors so weird you can go long hours without acknowledging my existence

i give and give and just get “ i’m locked in / i want a supportive gf “ while i get absolute nothing in return not even the bare minimum bf stuff and it’s christmas eve n you can’t even drive to pick me up last night n not grateful i still send you pics n it’s the only time i get a response with some emotion for gods sake grow tf up already

so you just don’t want to do anything bf related at all got it understood go ahead and leave me alone from here on out hope my absence gives you nothing but peace and finally your biggest problem will show herself the way out cause i’m done i’ve hit my breaking point

it’s upsetting cause i bet my life your next girls gonna get everything i basically begged two years for it’s not fair everyone gets you but me lol but i hope you man up for someone eventually and wish you the best

bruh you can’t tell me me merry xmas lol and u can’t say i can do it too i put in 99 percent of the effort in this situation ship while u do nothing but make me feel like shit and then go and take NO accountability you think your perfect you think your the number one trophy

i don’t do well during the holidays so im gonna continue to sleep

funny cause i started doing it yesterday

. i convinced myself you were different. i’m dumb. excuses are all i hear now.

if a man doesn’t wanna spend the time on me i should be smart enough to just leave. im not worth your time. you see no future with me. me

leaving would be a huge relief to you. just apparently from the screenshots i just been your side piece or something. it’s makes sense tho. never met family / friends . never been posted. don’t have me on socials. not a gf.

not sure how these girls find me. im gonna

go ahead and respect

myself.

it eats me alive every night. how much you don’t want me. i’m tired of trying. tired of messages of some

yeaaaaa. seeing you still liking women’s selfies or thot ass pictures and still following them. makes me feel so bad. i’m getting off social because of you. lol you don’t have to understand. i actually don’t care if you don’t understand. not like you ever put yourself in my shoes to understand anyways.

so i guess this is really the thing that marks it done for me. i’m done. over likes. its so funny to hear you say you hate your phone and then you like every goddamn selfie you see.

you do not respect me. and i can’t take it anymore for my well being i have nothing more to say anymore. you continue to do it. okay. i won’t tolerate you disrespecting me anymore.

i hate to do this over text i wanted to do it in person and attempt to talk. but there’s no changing your mind on the matter.

i don’t want you acting different like you said i make you do.

i really don’t want to stop whatever it is we have, but i can not continue either. you continue to like women’s selfies and follow a bunch of thots. it’s disrespectful- end of discussion on that for me.

i have to rebuild my confidence because your actions make my confidence so low. i want a guy who only has eyes for me not random gorls on instagram that don’t even follow

you back

. and for my sanity- i just can’t do it. at some point i have to respect myself. i’m crying as i type this. cuz you’re all i had. but it’s torture.

the only thing that replays in my head is you letting me know you never took me serious and you never will. i love you so much it hurts, this hurts. i can’t believe im doing this. but i feel like i mean nothing to you. why should i stay where i am not wanted

before you start with excuses let me stop you. no one said delete your account. so don’t throw a fit. you have like ten and god only knows what your doing on those.

i don’t care if she’s your friend. you are

protecting their feelings over mine.

i’m sorry. i can’t take it. i’m miserable knowing im not what you like.

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tavarillasgalen · 9 months

Text

i literally keep crying today, and i think it's such a mix of emotions, of both the complexities of the holidays, anger at myself/my ex, and gratitude for all the ways my life has changed for the better this year.

i saw some journal prompts about writing down all the bad in a year to release it and then doing another about all the good, and i think... last year, there was so much bad. it was honestly one of the worst years of my life. but this year.... i think the good will far outweigh the bad.

but as far as bad things that happened this year:

i stayed with my ex for a whole month and a half past his dropping the bomb that he's actually NOWHERE NEAR done with his license, when he had led me to believe he almost had it and we could move this year. i stayed even though i was so bored, the relationship made me anxious, i wanted to die, etc.

my first personal trainer quit :( i really liked working with him. but he was working 2 jobs, his mental health was struggling with all the work, he was growing to hate the gym, he was worried he wasn't spending enough time with his girlfriend, he was struggling with most of his clients canceling all the time (like my current trainer does to me now lol), and he mentioned how he was getting paid a fraction of what i was paying the gym to have a trainer. so, like. i was expecting him to quit, and i'm really proud of him for doing what was best for him. but i'm just sad because he was an excellent trainer. he told me he'd let me know if he ever does training on his own again.

i just made a post about this, but my current trainer is... well. idk. when we were set up together, i thought she would be a perfect fit, even better than my last trainer. but then... she cancels so much, she treats me like i don't know things, she repeats herself so much, she does 40 minutes of training when i pay for 60, and all the other things i mentioned in the other post... it's.... i've grown to dread our sessions together.

my horse's old stable.... this was... huge. so, after last year when they were making me out to be a drama queen for telling them that it's unacceptable for them to steal my horse's toys, for them to move her stall without telling me, and all this, this year, they... fired the cowboy who was in charge of taking care of the horses. so. they didn't clean her stall. or turn her out. or even give her all of her meals. i had to go do that even though we were paying them for full care. like, the horror of when i went to go see her on the weekend only to see that her stall looked like it hadn't been cleaned all week... i was FURIOUS. we had to move her because we could no longer trust them to even feed her. i can't believe they're still in business.

loud coworkers who act like you're the problem for needing the office to be quiet in order to concentrate on your work and for not liking to hear shit-talking.

annoying coworkers stay annoying.

people in general treating me like i am stupid.

people trying to put me down and brush off what i am good at/have accomplished.

that one ballet guy who somehow knew where my little brother goes to school... he seemed perfectly nice outside of that, but that was when i was like, okay..... time to find a new ballet studio, lol.

the retinol uglies. those weren't fun. thankfully, they only lasted a month.

i somehow got an STD???? when i went to my yearly wellcheck and the test results came back and the doctor asked about if i'd had any sexual encounters recently, and i was like... only ever with my ex, and i don't even know if we had sex at all in the month and a half leading up to the breakup. so... not sure how that happened, unless he was cheating on me or something.... thankfully, it was super easy to treat, like, it was gone in 2 weeks. but just... how the fuck did i even get that.

my car got a flat tire - which kind of turned out to be a good thing because then it got new tires, and it was likely going to be due for new tires this year anyway.

general mental health struggles, lol

general struggles that come along with not being paid enough to be able to live on your own.

a fantasy photoshoot i had scheduled had to be cancelled because the photographer got covid

i was supposed to go to comic con with another person i'd met the year before, but she left me high and dry, so i had to do the thing alone while also being like... what's wrong with me, she said she'd be happy to go with me, she said she'd meet me here, she said she was on the way, and then... ghosted. so that didn't feel good.

as you can tell, i'm kind of reaching for straws a bit here, lol.

#personal

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solianin · 1 year

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Treatment of sexually transmitted diseases

This is the kind of question I'm interested in about sexually transmitted diseases. I need to get tested. I want to see all the clinics where it is possible to do it. A friend suggested a clinic where to get tested for stds near me https://easystd.com/std-testing It seems to be a normal option, but I'm worried that the result is reliable. Maybe I should also look for a place where I can get tested for stds so that there are no mistakes.

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rapidtesting · 4 years

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4uhealth · 3 months

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Comprehensive Full Panel STD Testing: What You Need to Know

In today's world, sexual health is an essential aspect of overall well-being. Regular testing for sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) is crucial in maintaining sexual health and preventing the spread of infections. One effective approach to this is through comprehensive full panel std testing near me. But what exactly does this entail, and where can you find reliable testing near you? Additionally, with advancements in medical science, pharmacogenetic testing has become a significant tool in personalized medicine. Let's explore these topics in detail.

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lowpricedlabs-blog · 4 years

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3 Top Thoughts on Over The Counter STD Test

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allthingsfangirl101 · 2 years

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Different Kind of Passenger Part 2–Kurt Kunkle

Part 1

Recap: The feeling Kurt got when the girl smiled and said his name was the same feeling he got when one of his videos went viral.

Usually, he would be taking his passenger the wrong way. For some reason, he continued driving this girl where she wanted. Out of all the people who have gotten into his backseat, what was stopping him from hurting this girl?

He couldn't help but watch her jog up the steps into her apartment building.

Kurt didn't know who that girl was. What he did know was that he had to see her again.

Kurt nervously chewed on his thumbnail as he waited for her to walk out. Over the last month, he hasn't been able to stop thinking about that girl. Because of the rideshare app, he was able to get her name. With her name and the address where he dropped her off, it wasn't hard to find her.

And he found her.

He found her online. He found where she worked. He found her friends. He found her family. He found where she hung out. He found the bookstore she always goes to after work every Friday. He even found where she takes her walks during her lunch breaks.

Kurt checked the clock on his dashboard to see that Y/N would be taking her lunch-time walk through the park any minute now. He got out and tried to act casual as he walked over to a bench and sat down. He pulled out his phone, trying to look like he wasn't waiting for her.

His eyes glanced up, continually looking for her. When he finally saw her, one sentence kept repeating in his head:

Please notice me. Please notice me. Please notice me. Please notice me.

"Kurt?"

His breath got caught in his throat when she said his name. Kurt looked up, unable to stop the smile that formed when his eyes met with her gorgeous Y/E/C eyes.

"Y/N, right?" He stuttered.

"That's me," she smiled her bewitching smile. "You drove me home from the bar after I found out my boyfriend was cheating on me with my best friend."

"Oh yeah," he scoffed. "Whatever happened to them?"

"Ironically enough," she laughed as she sat down next to him, "they both got an STD. From each other."

"That's perfect," he laughed. He stopped and turned toward her. "Wait. . ."

"I got tested," she instantly said with a small giggle, "and I'm clean. He must've gotten it from some stripper he was lying about."

"I'm sorry," he sighed.

"Really?" She smirked. "I'm not."

Kurt hesitated before asking, "I know this is kind of straightforward, but would you like to go to lunch with me? It doesn't have to be today. I mean. . . It could always be. . ."

"As luck would have it," Y/N chuckled when Kurt struggled to continue, "I'm on my lunch break and the store-bagged salad I brought is nowhere near as appetizing as a burger."

Y/N stood up and turned toward Kurt expectantly. "Are we going or not?"

"Yeah," he stuttered. "Totally."

Kurt wiped his hands on his jeans as he quickly stood up. His heart was beating hard against his chest as he started walking next to her. The heart attack he was having got worse when she wrapped her arm around his.

The two went to a small diner and spent an hour laughing, talking, and getting to know each other better. The more he got to know Y/N, the more Kurt wanted her.

His heart sank when she looked at her watch. She looked back up at him with apologetic eyes.

"I should be getting back," she sighed. "I'm sorry, Kurt."

"It's okay," he smiled, not wanting her to ever feel guilty. "I understand. Can I walk you back?"

"I'd love that," she giggled.

As they left the restaurant and walked back to the park, Kurt kept thinking about how Y/N said she'd love to have him walk her back. Not like, but love.

He finally refocused when they got to the park. He looked over to see Y/N in her head.

"You okay?" He asked.

"Yeah," she said with a smile on her face. It slightly changed when she added, "Just wondering if we're. . ."

"If we're what?" Kurt asked, trying to hide how eager he was.

"If we're ever going to see each other again," she sighed, looking up at him with an adorable blush on her cheeks.

Kurt's laugh made her cheeks brighten and her look away. Kurt reached up and gently grabbed her chin, turning her toward him.

"I'd like to see you again, Y/N."

"We could always message through the drive share app but it would be easier if I had your number," she smirked. She grabbed her phone and handed it to Kurt.

After he put his number into her phone, he opened her Find My iPhone app and shared her location with him, leaving it on. He then quickly closed the app and sent himself a text.

"Did you forget your number?" She teased when he finally handed her phone back.

"No," he awkwardly laughed. "I sent myself a text so that I would have your number too."

"Smart guy," she giggled. Before heading back to work, Y/N stood on her toes and kissed his cheek.

"See you around, Kurt."

"I'll make sure of it," Kurt mumbled once she was out of earshot.

* * * * *

The night was slow. Kurt tried to find another passenger, but he couldn't stop thinking about Y/N. He instantly grabbed his phone and started tracking her.

Y/N was at a bar. Kurt hoped that she was with friends. Female friends. The idea of her being with another guy made him tighten his grip on the steering wheel.

He clenched his jaw as he started driving to the bar. He pulled in and had to force himself to calm down before getting out. He walked into the bar, looked around, and instantly found Y/N.

Kurt let out a deep breath when he saw her with her friends. They were at a table, not far from the bar. He hid in a booth across the bar. She couldn't see him, but he could see her.

He sat there for two hours, watching Y/N and her friends. Y/N was a slow drinker compared to her friends. She only had two by the time her friends had at least double that.

Y/N was walking back from the bathroom when some guy walked up to her. Kurt couldn't hear what the guy was saying to Y/N, but he could tell that she didn't like it.

When the guy grabbed Y/N as she tried to walk away, Kurt stood up. He started running when the guy dragged Y/N into the alley. By the time Kurt got there, the guy had Y/N pressed up against the side of the bar and was kissing her neck. She was trying to get him off of her but he was too strong.

"Hey!" Kurt yelled. He ran over and grabbed the guy's shirt, yanking him off of Y/N.

"Kurt?" She stuttered as he protectively stood in front of her.

"What the hell, man?" The guy scoffed. "My lady and I were just trying to have some fun."

"She is not your lady," Kurt said through his teeth. He calmed down a little when he felt Y/N step closer to him, grabbing his arm.

"Get lost," Kurt warned.

"Or what?" The guy smirked. Kurt stepped away from Y/N, getting in the guy's face.

"Or you'll deal with me," he threatened. "And you won't walk away from it."

Kurt turned around, grabbed Y/N's hand, and pulled her out of the alleyway. He kept his grip on her hand as he led her to his car. He didn't let go until he opened the passenger car door for her.

When he got in the car, he drove off. He didn't say anything as they got away from the bar. Y/N looked over and saw him tightly holding the steering wheel. Her heart sank when she saw his knuckles turning white.

"Kurt?" She whispered. "Will you pull over? Please?"

He let out a shaky breath as he pulled into the parking lot of a neighborhood park. He threw the car in park, struggling to calm down. Y/N reached over and grabbed his hand.

Kurt looked over at her to see her smiling at him. He couldn't help it when his eyes drifted down to Y/N's lips. He quickly looked back up at her but she saw it.

They leaned in, their lips gently touching. Kurt deepened the kiss by cupping her cheek in his hand. He had to force himself to slow down. If he wasn't careful, he'd get out of control. Fast.

Y/N broke the kiss, both of them breathing heavily as they pressed their foreheads together.

"Thank you for interfering," she whispered as she leaned back.

"I'm just happy I was there," Kurt said softly. He clenched his jaw as he thought about what would've happened if he hadn't been there. "If I wasn't. . . He would've. . ."

Kurt closed his eyes, imagining what he'd do if that asshole ever got in his car. He was brought out of his daydream when Y/N reached up and grabbed his face.

"But you were," she said softly. "You stopped him, Kurt. You saved me."

"I had to save you," Kurt said under his breath.

"Why?" Y/N asked with an innocent smile.

"Because," he stuttered." I had to because. . . Because. . ."

"Because?" She teased as she scooted as close as the armrest would let her. She pressed her forehead to his, softly rubbing her nose against his. She smiled as she said what he couldn't.

"Could it be because you, Mr. Driver, have feelings for someone you drove?"

Kurt's heart jumped into his throat. He scooted closer to her, wanting nothing but her.

"Could it be you have feelings for someone who drove you?"

Y/N smiled as she climbed over the armrest and straddled Kurt's lap. He laughed as he wrapped his arm around her waist. She leaned in and pressed her lips to his. Kurt couldn't help but moan as their lips started moving in sync. This kiss wasn't as innocent as the others.

Y/N broke the kiss, both breathing heavily. The tension between the two was thick. Y/N leaned back and smirked up at Kurt.

"Would it be so bad?" She teased. Kurt let out a deep grunt that sounded more like a moan as he grabbed her, tightly massaging her hips.

"I guess not."

#kurt kunkle #spree #joe keery #joe keery imagines #joe keery x reader #joe keery POV #steve harrington #stranger things #Walter keys mckeys #free guy

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mercy-burning · 3 years

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Your Favorite — Part 2

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!Reader Summary: Y/N and Spencer decide to keep seeing each other in secret. Category: SMUT (18+) Content: Adults w/ age gap, cockwarming, heavy petting, penetrative/unprotected sex, breeding kink, oral sex (both receiving), degradation, exhibitionism, fingering, cum play maybe? Word Count: 7.5k

PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3 | MASTERLIST

NOTE: This is... *nervous laugh* this is pure filth. Like... It’s nothing but sex scenes, y’all. Buckle in. (Also the end is a lil angsty so watch out hehehe)

———

JULY 8th

"You're sure you guys are okay without me for a little while?"

I love my mom. Really, I do.

But if she delays her bath for any longer than one more second, I'm going to burst into flames.

Thankfully it seems that Spencer is patient enough for the both of us. "Positive. You deserve to relax a little. Go. Take your bath, we'll be fine."

Mom looks to me for extra reassurance, and I give it to her with a nod.

"Okay. I'll try not to be too long."

She turns and kisses Spencer, long and lovesick, and I want to barf. What's even worse is that when she pulls away and pats my head before retreating up the stairs, he's smiling. And he's supposed to, I know that. Part of him obviously cares about my mom, and even if he's only fucking me on the side, the fact remains that he goes to sleep next to her. That's the way it has to be.

But it still makes me incredibly envious.

It's a problem.

Mom is upstairs now, but our rule is that unless we know for certain that she's not coming into sight or earshot anytime soon, we remain distant.

Still, I make my distaste for their affections known. "You guys are gross..."

Spencer laughs, his hand sneaking over the couch cushion and grazing the end of my skirt. "Jealous, are we?"

Of course, I have to make it difficult for him. "You're a genius, you tell me..."

"Hey now... You're lucky I'm giving you any attention at all... Besides, you know the rules."

I glance over at him, practically crumbling apart at the seams under his intense gaze. It's one I've gotten used to as of late, one that rivals every smile I've ever seen him give my mother.

"Doesn't make it any easier," I mumble, glancing down at where his fingers are still toying with my skirt.

"I know..." He reaches out and touches my hand, and my skin tingles. "Come here."

Even though I can hear that the bath water has only just started running from below, I comply all the same. I scramble off the couch and return on his lap, straddling him and nesting my fingers through his hair while I lean in to kiss him.

He welcomes me with open arms and an open mouth. The moment our tongues brush, I sigh and melt into him, needing desperately to be as close as possible. Our kisses then are languid and wet, and soft. We don't want to get carried away in case we need to be alert and jump apart, so it's best to keep our bodies controlled.

But as I'm learning, around Spencer, controlling myself is painstakingly difficult.

A whine escapes me when his right hand slips under my skirt and rests along the inside of my thigh, and I shift, silently begging him to give me more.

"So impatient..." he mumbles over my mouth.

I pull away and slide my hands down over his neck and shoulders, my hips rolling forward as I pout. "I haven't had you all week. I'm lonely..."

It's true.

Once all my STD tests came back clean and I got my birth control figured out and solid, the first thing he did was tell my mom he wasn't feeling well and texted me the address to his apartment. And after I told her I was meeting up with a friend, I drove over there and got my brains completely fucked out. We spent all day under the sheets, on the couch, over the kitchen counter, and then on the floor, until I had to go home and pretend like it never happened.

Since then we'd only slept together once, and that was just over a week ago, quickly while Mom ran to the store for an onion of all things. And then Spencer had been busy with consulting on new cases that his old job wanted a little help with, and once he had free time, Mom insisted they go on a date weekend.

I pout harder, stomach churning at the memory of the look he gave me before they left—a silent, sweet goodbye that had left me empty and wanting.

But he's just amused.

A smirk ghosts over his lips, red and a little puffy from the pressure of my own against them. "So I definitely can't trust you to be quiet enough to fuck you properly..."

That warrants another whine and another roll of my hips, and I can feel his hand gripping my thigh a little tighter.

"Please... Spencer, I need you..."

His name rolling off my tongue must be what makes him give into me, because I barely have time to react before he's kissing me again, using both of his hands to lift the back of my skirt up and knead my ass.

"Wait... Are you wearing..."

I grin over his lips, wiggling my ass into his touch and utterly turned on by the fact that he knows what underwear I'm wearing just by touch.

"Mhmm," I answer, nipping his bottom lip. "Your favorite..."

The sound that rumbles in his chest as he crashes his body against mine has to be the sexiest thing I've ever heard. He's obviously trying not to be loud, but it's hard, and that makes the sound strained. He really wants this, wants to keep me, and to do that he has to refrain from going absolutely primal right now. He has to do anything to keep this quiet.

So he pushes me off of him, and I pout, thinking he's given up until we can get a true moment alone.

But I know that isn't the case when he spins his finger and then starts undoing his pants.

"Turn around, sweetheart," he huffs, slipping his pants and underwear down just enough that his erection emerges free. "You're gonna sit here, keep quiet, and keep my cock nice and warm, understood?"

Don't have to tell me twice... I'll fucking take what I can get.

So I spin, back up, and move all my clothing to the side, my skirt lifting as I nestle into Spencer's lap and hold my panties to the side. He laughs at my eagerness, though he isn't laughing much longer once I sink down onto him and get in real close. His hands come out to grab my chest and pull me flush against his own.

The way he stretches and fills me has my eyes rolling back, a long, happy sigh falling from my lips. I wish I could say I'm being dramatic about it, but I'm really not.

I'm genuinely relieved and satisfied with the burn.

"There's my girl," Spencer muses through a sigh of his own, his breath fanning gently over my neck right before he gives it an open-mouthed kiss.

His hands slip under the baggy sweater I'm wearing and run along the planes of my stomach, then up and up, taking the fabric with him until it rests above my bare chest. Being exposed like this, right in the middle of the living room while my mom is just upstairs, excites me more than I think it should.

While Spencer kisses and licks at my neck, his hands now gently kneading my breasts, I squirm.

He doesn't like that very much.

"Ah-ah," he warns, squeezing me tight and pulling me into him more. "Relax..."

He hooks his legs around mine then, spreading them apart and somehow filling me deeper. I whine, leaning my head back onto his shoulder and trying not to roll my hips.

Instead, I settle for clenching myself around him, and that seems to be the right move.

"Atta girl... Lay back and relax... Just feel me filling you up nice and slow..."

"Mmmm," I respond in kind as his hands loosen and glide down my body.

He's light with his touch, though the kisses on my neck feel hungry, and his cock feels heavy and thick inside me. It's a beautiful contrast, really, making me feel so full and yet so light, like I'm a raincloud.

Soon his fingers dip under my skirt and cover my hand, which is working at keeping my panties off to the side. He traces the curves of my fingers with his own, mumbling praises and scattering kisses along the side of my neck. And I'm distracted enough that I almost don't feel his other hand make gentle contact with my clit until I gasp from the sharp sensation.

I can feel his smile against my skin as he starts rubbing in slow, precise circles.

"That feel good, princess?"

"Uh huh," I breathe out, trying to keep still. My other hand digs into my knee in hopes that I can stay grounded and focused on keeping still. But despite that, I'm feeling rather calm. Satisfied...

Right where he wants me.

"Mmm..." He hums happily into my skin, continuing to kiss my neck while working my clit.

And I have no idea how long we lay there. It feels like it could be hours.

The TV is on, but we're not paying any attention to it. In the back of my mind I know that Mom could be done with her bath at any minute, but it's been too long without Spencer inside me... And even though he's not actually fucking me, just having him this close and feeling him touch me, fill me, breathe me in...

God, I never want it to stop.

I'm almost on the verge of coming, but he removes his hand from me and slides them up my stomach again.

I whine at the loss of orgasm, but he pays it no mind. "Here's what you're gonna do. You're gonna start moving..."

I start to get excited, wiggling in his lap a little.

With a dark laugh, he brings his hands to my breasts, kneading them gently and nipping my earlobe. Getting my attention...

"But you're not gonna stop until I fill that slutty little cunt with my cum, got it? I don't care if you come more than once. I don't care if you come at all... I don't care if your mom comes down here and sees..."

I swear I almost come on the spot from his words alone.

And then his voice is somehow even darker, seeping through my skin and settling into the very deepest parts of me.

"You will not stop until you make me come, am I clear?"

I wouldn't deny him if I could. I'm so damn whipped by this man, so eager to please and be near him that he could ask me to do any fucking thing on the planet and I would.

My rational brain might have second-guessed that feeling if it hadn't been horny as fuck...

And so I get to it, maneuvering my hips and working Spencer's cock like my life depends on it. And honestly, it kind of does, because if my mother comes down and catches us I'm dead.

Despite the urgency, though, I relish every second of it. I try to remember every sensation vividly because I don't know when I'll get to feel it again. So every time I sit back down on his dick, I clench it on the way up, because I know that drives him wild and it also means I get to feel him grab me tighter.

I can't see him, not even really when I turn my head, but I can picture how he's probably biting his lip, trying not to be loud. His eyes are probably shooting daggers at the ceiling, praying to the heavens above that my mom won't come down.

But it looks like the heavens above have decided to damn us to hell.

That unmistakable sound of the drain in the tub rumbles through the ceiling and down the inside of the walls as the water travels through the pipes, and my heartbeat races faster than it ever has.

Spencer tugs my hair then, pulling my head to meet his shoulder once more. "You better hurry, little girl..."

That's when I finally come. My cunt throbs and shakes around him as I bounce as quietly as I can. His grip in my hair is tighter, urging me to keep going, and the sharp sensation seems to extend my orgasm a little.

I whimper and whine as I feel it, and that seems to be what does him in.

"Fuck, Y/N, that's it... That's my girl..."

Four more bounces from me is all it takes, and then he's holding my hips in place. He grunts as quietly as possible into my shoulder and fucks into me slowly, filling me to the brim with his cum and breathing harshly into my skin.

I can hear Mom walking around upstairs, most likely getting dressed, which means she'll be down any minute...

"Time to get up, princess," Spencer whispers a moment later, letting go of my hips.

I turn my head into his neck, whining. "I don'wanna..."

"I know, I know... But you have to."

I know he's right. But I can't just get up and lose him so quickly. I want to hold on for as long as possible.

So I tilt my head up and bring his lips to mine. Thankfully he doesn't reject me, instead returning my affections and sighing into my mouth. He's still sheathed inside me, and I can feel his cum very slowly starting to drip down.

I have to get up now...

My mouth reluctantly parts from his and pouts. I expect him to return it with a sad smile, but his lips are rather mischievous.

He smirks, lifting me off of him and quickly pulling my panties back in place. His cum instantly soaks into the thin, lavender fabric, and it only reminds me of his absence.

But then Spencer spins me around on the heels of my feet and presses his hand firmly to my clothed, sopping wet cunt under my skirt, rubbing it in and making me whimper out at the overstimulation.

"I missed you," he whispers sincerely. Sweetly...

I can't help but smile as I lean down to kiss him one more time.

"I missed you, too."

JULY 23rd

I've been looking forward to this weekend since Mom brought it up after her bath—A call from work. A weekend business trip across the country.

She would be gone for almost a whole week.

Spencer's already started on his coursework for the next school year so he'll be busy most days, but at night? That's when he's all mine.

The only hard part about this, really, is containing my excitement. Just yesterday Spencer got me alone and warned me that I better keep my cool and be patient. Though, the way he said it was hardly a bad thing considering it gave me an excuse to feel his hands on me, even in the laundry room where, more or less, this had all started.

Even now I can still feel their warmth and their heft as they grope and paw at my breasts while he attacks my neck with sloppy kisses.

But right now he's not here, and as much as I can't wait to spend the week with him, my mom is also going to be gone for that long.

Just because I'm fucking her boyfriend on a regular basis doesn't mean I don't still love her.

Though, the thought of it all makes me a little uneasy—I don't know what the future holds. I know Spencer obviously cares about my mom, but if it really gets to a point where they've been together long enough, would he ever marry her?

And then what?

It's one thing for him to be my mom's boyfriend, who doesn't live here and only stays when he can... But it's a whole other one to be my stepfather. And what if my mom wants to have another kid?

No.

I'm not even going to think about it... If it ever gets to that point, then we'll deal with it, but right now I've only known Spencer for nearly 2 months, and it's way too soon to be thinking about any of that right now.

"You gonna be alright without me for a week?"

I curl into Mom's side, laughing and thankful for her distraction. "I spend almost a whole year away at college without you, I think I can survive five days."

"Ugh, don't remind me. I wish you could just stay here with me forever."

"Ha, no you don't. I'm a menace."

"Only when you eat all my food and then complain that you're starving..."

My eyes roll affectionately. "Mom. That was one time, and I was fifteen and dramatic."

She kisses the top of my head and then rests her chin on it. "Then my point stands... You were only a menace when you were fifteen. Now you're an angel."

I can tell she's sincere, and when I tell her Thank you, it feels incredibly deceitful—Especially when she starts humming my favorite song and brushing through my hair with her fingers, just like she used to do to get me to sleep as a kid. The foggy feeling it sends through my bloodstream reminds me that I'm definitely not the same person I was back then.

Although, it is true that some things never change, and within minutes I'm soundly asleep in my mother's arms.

———

When Spencer and I are sending her off at the airport the next morning, my heart thrums wildly in my chest.

"You have Spencer's number in case of an emergency?" she asks me in a haste.

"Yes, Mom. For the thousandth time, I have his number, and I have Grandma's number, and I have just about every other number you've ever given me for emergency contacts."

She gives me The Look.

"Yes, I have it. And I'll be okay. I love you."

"Oh, I love you, too," she says, pulling me in for one last breath-reducing hug, though, that's not truly what knocks the breath from my lungs.

She goes to Spencer next, reaching up to give him a goodbye kiss. I'm expecting it. I'm okay with it.

But this is unlike any other kiss I've seen them share, and it admittedly makes me jealous.

Spencer almost has her off the ground, pressing her close to him and kissing her deeply. Her hands weave through his hair as he tilts his head, and this time I can see his tongue slip into her mouth.

"O—kaaay, my eyes are burning... Thank you for that..."

I know I can get away with that because it's a completely normal reaction to seeing your mother make out with anyone, so I don't feel bad about it one bit. And I especially don't feel bad about the warning look he gives me over my mom's shoulder when she comes to give me another hug.

But then she's gone, and minutes later we're leaving the airport parking lot, and I can't seem to shake my jealousy. Even when his hand rests politely on my knee.

The whole way home I only barely acknowledge his presence, giving him half-hearted smiles and remaining mostly still when he glides his hand higher up my leg. By the time his fingers slip under the hem of my skirt, I think he knows something is up, because it stops there.

He waits until we get in the house to bring it up.

"Y/N, are you okay?"

I plop myself down on the couch with an overexaggerated sigh. "Kinda..."

I know Spencer used to be a profiler, and really, it's not that hard to figure out what's wrong with me. But it's still a little scary how easily he just knows.

"You know I had to," he says, walking over and standing in front of me. "Keeping up appearances and whatnot."

He's right. And it's a consequence of what we've decided to do, so really I'm in no place to complain.

Still, I reach out and pull him in by the belt loops, leaning my face in rather close to his crotch. "You know... Actually, I think you just like making me jealous..."

The smile that dances over his lips is amused and downright sinful. "Oh?"

"Mhmm," I drawl, sliding my hands to the front of his pants and rubbing him through the fabric.

He laughs. "Yeah, you are pretty cute when you're all huffy."

With big eyes and a fluttering in my stomach at the way he looks down at me, I feel that pressing of jealousy start to lift off my chest. I know that within an hour he'll have me pinned under his body somehow, and the thought allows my response to come out clearly and without question.

"So how are you gonna make it up to me?"

———

We're already out of our clothes by the time we make it upstairs. And when we finally get into my bedroom, I'm about to shut the door and then Spencer stops me.

"No one's home, sweetheart... Leave it open."

He takes two steps and has me in his arms, his hands sliding down my back and resting over my ass. And when he gives it a squeeze, he grins down at me. "You're gonna be loud for me, understand?"

"Hey, that's on you," I tease, wiggling against him. "You want me loud? Make me loud."

His grip on my ass gets tighter as he pulls me closer, and I yelp out. "Don't challenge me, little girl... You'll regret it."

I laugh then, calling back to his earlier statement. "Aw... You're pretty cute when you're all huffy..."

"Alright, fine."

The next thing I know, I'm on my knees, and his hands are rooting in my hair. The rough carpet underneath me already burns, but I know in the end it's gonna be so worth it.

Spencer brings me close to his exposed crotch and tilts my head up to look at him. "I'm gonna fuck that attitude right out of your pretty little mouth, got it? And you're not gonna do a damn thing but take it like a good girl."

I would have asked him if that was a threat or a promise if he hadn't immediately shoved his dick in my mouth. It has me wet in an instant, the way he just pulls me onto him and starts fucking my face with an urgency that seems to contradict all the time we have. He needs me now, with no time for teasing or pleasantries, and I fucking love it.

Which is why I do as I'm told, enjoying every second as he holds my head still and snaps his hips forward, his velvety smooth cock gliding over my tongue and down my throat with ease. It doesn't take long for my eyes to water, my vision going blurry and my body growing hot. My face is angled straight ahead, but I still find a way to look up at him, and from this low angle?

It's the best thing I've ever seen.

No matter how many times I've been on my knees like this, staring up at Spencer as he loses himself at my hands (or rather my mouth, if you want to get technical), I swear I could never tire of it.

His eyes are glaring down at me as he concentrates, his arms are out in front of me as they hold my head in place, and his pubic bone and sculpted hips are right there, moving ferociously in front of my eyes. He's so deep in my throat for a few seconds, holding me down while I gag around him, that my nose is buried in the soft trail of hair that gathers on his skin, and I want to stay there forever.

But my gag reflex isn't much durable for more than fifteen seconds, much less forever, so I have to pull back.

Spencer pulls me off of him completely, a trail of spit following my lips and then detaching until it lands along my chin. I blink away some of the tears that had gathered in my eyes and pout up at him.

"What's the matter, sweetheart?"

"You're supposed to be making it up to me..." My voice is scratchy and a little hoarse now, but I know it'll probably be worse if Spencer really thinks he can make me as loud as he says (which I truly don't doubt for a second).

He tugs me up by the hair, and I whine as I get to my feet, my knees aching already. And then his mouth is on my cheek, gently kissing away a tear. "Aw, I thought you liked having my dick in your mouth..."

"I do..."I giggled a little, nestling into his body and feeling his erection, now slick with my saliva, press up against the inside of my thigh. "But I like it better in other places..."

"Mmm, you're right... I do, too..."

I certainly hadn't been expecting that answer.

But it doesn't surprise me when he walks us over to the foot of my bed and pushes me onto it. "Hands and knees, princess."

My knees still burn from the carpet, and I'm sure this squeaky-ass mattress won't alleviate the pain at all, but if there's one thing I've learned since having sex with Spencer it's that pain is all part of the pleasure.

So I don't question it. My limbs submit to his simple command, and once I turn away from him and perch myself on my hands and knees, I can feel him climbing on the bed and crawling up the backside of my body. His hands roam my ass and my waist, and within seconds he has his cock nestled against me.

He moves nice and slow at first, dragging the length of him through my slick cunt and ghosting the skin of my backside with his hands.

"Remember... Nice and loud, okay? Wanna hear how good I make you feel."

Like I could ever deny him. Even though I like to tease him and push his buttons, I couldn't think of a single thing in the moment that I'd ever deny him.

So he finally pushes into me, stretching me out well and good, and a low groan slowly rolls off my tongue like a waterfall. And I'm not doing it for his sake; It's like he draws it out of me like a syringe, and I'm utterly powerless against it... Against him.

Like I need a metaphor to explain how I'm well and truly his bitch...

"There she is..." Spencer breathes, reaching the very deepest part of me and staying there. "There's my obedient little girl... Tell me what you want."

I turn my head to get as good of a look at him as I can, and give him the pout to end all pouts. "I want you to fuck me, hard... Please?"

His answer is a gentle push forward, his body leaning over mine to take my hands and pin them behind my back, which pulls me up towards him so that my back is nearly flush with his chest. His hands are so big that one of them is able to hold both of my wrists while the other gathers my hair and tugs.

I feel like I'm being held by a bungee cord, especially when Spencer starts snapping his hips and pounding into me roughly. My knees are pushing into the springs of the mattress and lifting again with each thrust, and I can't help the stream of whimpers and shouts that escape me at the whole experience.

He lets go of my hair in favor of reaching around and palming my left tit, his pace never faltering for a second. Everything he's doing is precise and swift and so fucking good that my eyes can hardly stay open.

"I'm hearing you, pretty girl, but I don't think you're quite loud enough..." he grumbles in my ear, letting go of me and gently pushing me back down on the bed. He slips out of me and I whine at the loss, but I don't have to worry about it much longer when I feel him lay down over top of me and slam into me hard.

I yelp out, my hands reaching out and clutching the comforter for dear life. Spencer's hands, meanwhile, push up off the mattress on either side of my hips to lift himself up, and then he's grabbing my waist and pushing me into it while he fucks me.

When I instinctively shove my face down and try to muffle myself, though, one of his hands leaves my waist and comes up to tug my hair, pulling my head up. His hips pause, pressed deep into my backside, and I can feel how he's struggling to keep still.

"Uh-uh... No one's home, princess... Let it all out..."

He pulls back and plows into me again, and this time his pace is frustratingly slow. With each slam forward my voice grows louder, begging him for more with incoherence until I start to feel myself grow tense with pleasure.

"You're almost there, baby, I can feel it," Spencer breathes. His voice is far away, and I wish he was closer, his breath on my neck and his lips not far behind. But for now I gladly settle for his hands, tight and bruising on my hips, and the force of his pelvis as it collides brutally and wonderfully with my ass.

What finally brings me sweet release is the sound of him grunting out one word. A command. And once again it's like I'm powerless under his spell.

"Come."

I do, and he fucks me thoroughly through each wave. Even once I've finished, he chases his own orgasm for minutes.

By the sounds he's making and the way his hips falter here and there, I can tell he's close, but he wants to make it last. I want to tell him that we have all weekend, to maybe tease him a bit, but I'm so fucked out and incoherent that I couldn't have said a single word if I tried.

So I lay there and take it with a weary smile on my face, ever the whiny, whimpering mess that I am, and patiently wait for the moment he decides to let go.

And when he does, it's the most glorious feeling in the world. I'm tired, yes, but never tired enough to lift myself and wiggle my ass back into him, clenching myself around him and relishing in the way he grunts out my name. He empties himself into me, and I hum, positively satisfied and warm.

Before I know it, I'm sinking down within the comfort of my blankets, and I rest my head in my arms, the pillow still a little too far out of reach. And though I'm content, I still whine out sadly when Spencer retreats and leaves me feeling empty.

I'm about to tell him to get over here and cuddle me when I feel his weight redistribute, and it isn't long before he has his head between my legs, his tongue acting as a net for the cum that drips out of me. He barely touches me, only the tiniest of flicks with the tip of his tongue darting over my skin. I can't tell if I'm thankful because of the relief or if I want the burn to go on forever.

In the end, I don't really have a choice.

He pushes his tongue up, sweeping over my dripping cunt and cleaning me up. Suddenly his mouth is everywhere, making the most delicious sounds and bringing me closer to another orgasm, and all I can do is let it happen. My weary smile is joined by a fluttering pair of eyelids and a string of whimpers that are so small they don't dare drown out the words Spencer is grumbling between my legs.

Some of which, I can hear, sound out, "Another one..."

His finger adds to the mix, coming up and rubbing my clit in tight circles as he finishes cleaning up the mess he made, and within seconds I'm a writhing mess at his undoing.

I'm not sure how long it lasts, only that one second I'm tensing with another orgasm and the next I'm having my limbs moved.

Spencer is beside me in an instant, his face coming into view as I feel my breathing slow to a steadier pace. The longer I wait, the more focused I am on his features, soft and even a little concerned as he strokes some of the hair from my face.

"How are you feeling?"

The smile that beams across my face is just about the most natural thing I'd ever felt. And it seems to bring out those bright glints of adoration in his eyes that only ever serve to make my heart flutter, which makes what I tell him even more true.

"I'm happy."

JULY 27th

Waking up to Spencer next to me, while a daily occurrence these past few days, is still possibly the most surprising and comforting feeling in the world.

Our bodies never part. From the moment we lay down to sleep until the moment we wake up and decide it's time to start doing necessary daily things, not one inch of skin is untouched. Even when showering.

I think back to yesterday morning, where he dragged me out of bed because he had to pee and didn't want to leave me. I was slumped over the backside of his body while he went and then in his arms again while he ran us a shower to wake up.

It brings the widest smile to my face, however sleepy it may also be.

"What are you smiling for?"

I squint one eye open and see that Spencer is staring at me. I hadn't expected him to be awake.

"Just thinking about yesterday..."

He tightens his grip on my waist and pulls me even closer, my face instantly drawn to the crook of his neck. "Mmm," he hums as I nestle in and press a sleepy kiss to the bare skin at the column of his throat. "Which part?"

"Our shower."

I feel his thumb then, rubbing back and forth over my hip as clearly as I can feel him smile against the top of my head. "That was fun, wasn't it..."

"Mhmm," I agree. My lightly tongue traces over his collarbone before I kiss it again. "Our shower is much better equipped for sex than yours."

"So... What you're saying is that shower sex is out of the question this morning?" he confirms with a laugh.

"That's exactly what I'm saying..."

"Well then, princess, what uhh... What alternatives do you think we should try out?"

I start to laugh when he pulls my leg up over his waist and hoists me over on top of him. My face remains buried into his neck, though I trail my lips up and up until I reach his jaw.

"Hmm... What if I just ride you and see where it takes us?"

When my lips finally reach his cheek, Spencer shifts and captures them in a long, butterfly-inducing kiss before pulling away with a smile and brushing the hair from my face. "I think that sounds like a wonderful idea."

It helps that I can already feel him hardening beneath me, and from the moment I felt his hands on me, I'd been aroused.

Though, as soon as I line him up and get ready to start our morning the right way, his phone rings on the bedside table. I'm tempted to keep going, but he half pushes me off of him when he reaches and reads the name.

"It's your mom."

That instantly kills my mood.

With a dramatic sigh and a pout, I hop off of him and curl up under the covers, letting him answer.

"Good morning," he chirps rather happily, and I try not to imagine my moms smile on the other end of the line. Thankfully I can't hear her, but I can still see Spencer smiling as he greets her and goes through all the pleasantries that come with a long distance relationship; I miss yous and how are yous...

I wonder if he really does miss her. He must, at least a little, right?

I'm staring straight ahead now, picking at my nails while I wait for them to finish talking, but something feels off.

I can feel Spencer's eyes on me.

But then he asks, "What are you wearing?" through the phone with a voice so playful and seductive, and I snap my head around, glaring at him.

"Really?" I mouth.

The smirk on his face makes me want to chuck his phone across the room.

"Mmm," he hums, looking me dead in the eye. And the next time he speaks, I swear he's talking directly to me. "Why don't you take it off... I want to talk you through some things..."

I know my mom is hearing the roughness in his voice through the phone, but right now I can see his eyes, hungry as they rake over my body once I slowly peel the blanket away and reveal myself to him, and I know that his main goal isn't to get my mom off.

It's to finish what we started before she'd interrupted.

"Touch yourself for me, baby? Nice and slow. Just relax..."

He softly crawls over to me, keeping the phone to his ear with one hand while the other takes my knees and spreads them apart.

I start to touch myself as instructed, but he swats my hand away and winks, nestling between my legs. I lean up on my elbows and tilt my head, wondering where he's going with this, when he leans his other cheek into my thigh.

"You know what I'd do to you right now If I was there?" A small pause. And then, "I'd use my fingers to slowly stretch you open... Feel you contract around me..."

His fingers do exactly like he says, and I have to stop myself from making any sound. The evil grin growing on his face as he does it all makes it even harder.

"I'd finger-fuck you nice and slow," he continues in a voice just above a whisper. "Until you're begging me for more."

When his eyes meet mine, once more I want to lean forward, snatch his phone, and smash it on the floor. I want him to utterly devour me, without any interruptions or avoidances at getting caught.

But he's such a fucking tease.

Mom must be talking on the other end, because Spencer is silent, slowly fucking me with his fingers and watching them intently as they disappear inside me. Entranced... The thought of her speaking to him and holding his attention makes me jealous— Sure, he's fucking me right now, but really, she's the one calling the shots.

I lean my head back in frustration, letting out the tiniest of whines and grinding my hips up into his hand, hoping and pleading for more.

A low laugh leaves him. "Please, what?"

It's not lost on me that my mom must have asked for more from him at the same time I did... It cements just how absolutely fucked this whole situation is, and yet I can't help but clench around his fingers in earnest, silently pleading with him to go on.

He removes his fingers from me and I sigh out, trying not to disrupt their call.

"And... How would you like me to fuck you?" he asks, looking at me with an evil grin and knowing damn well I can't actually answer.

After he gets her answer, he climbs up on his knees and spreads my legs further, throwing one of them up on his shoulder while he leaves the other on the bed. Since he only has one hand to work with, he gestures to it and I help him out, lifting my other leg up to my chest and holding it with one arm to let him get inside at a good angle.

"Yeah, and how do you want it, baby?" He lines himself up with me and very slowly sinks the head of his cock in, holding it and running his hand along my stomach. "I'm thinking... I'd like to fuck you so slow you're practically writhing beneath me..."

I stick my tongue out at him, and then without warning he slams into me. I bring a hand to my mouth and bite down on my finger, trying not to make a sound.

"You're gonna be patient... And you're gonna let me take my time... Until you're nice and desperate... Whining out for me like a good little whore..."

Each sentence is punctuated with another thrust, hard and deep, followed by a short pause, and it's all I can do not to cry out his name and beg him to go faster.

Mom must be talking on the line again, because Spencer doesn't say a word as he fucks me. His pace doesn't pick up or slow, and his own self control starts to recede—I can see it in his features. I can also feel it in the way his free hand grips my leg. He wants to go faster, he wants to lose control, and this is killing him just as much as it's killing me.

But then he pants into the phone, his voice breaking a little as he pauses and rolls his hips into me, slow and burning. I whine into my hand as quietly as possible, and he asks the question that will seal my fate.

"Where do you want it?"

I wait, clenching around him and praying for the result I want.

And then he laughs. "Yeah? You like when I paint you with my cum, huh?"

I shake my head, silently begging him to resist and stay inside me, but he only shrugs as if to say, Sorry about your luck, and then pulls out, leaving me whiny and desperate.

Just like he said.

And then, he comes all over me, stroking himself fast and hard. Even though I've still yet to feel any sort of relief, seeing him in front of me like this, feeling his warmth dance across my skin in warm spurts, and hearing him groan out as he watches my body gladly accept it all...

It's quite honestly the most satisfying thing I've ever seen.

I can't say I'm not happy, though, when he slumps down and pants, sighing out a few goodbyes to my mom and then tossing his phone on the floor when she hangs up.

He smiles at me then, and I pout.

"You're evil..."

"Mmm, you love it," he drawls, leaning down and starting to dart his tongue over the mess he made on my stomach. Meanwhile his finger finds its way inside me again, and I feel myself start to turn into a writhing mess once more.

And he's right.

I do love it.

JULY 29th

Approaching the front door with Mom in step behind me, knowing that Spencer awaits for her on the other side isn't what makes my heart jump out of my chest.

It's the look on both of their faces when they see each other.

Though I push Mom forward to go see him, it nearly breaks me seeing her run into his arms. He picks her up and spins her around, reminiscent of their little moment at the airport, and the pure happiness on her face specifically makes my stomach twist.

This time it isn't jealousy.

It's guilt.

She's... incredibly happy. I don't think I've ever seen her this happy before. She's positively beaming as she hugs him tight and buries her face into his chest.

And when he looks past her head and looks over at me, I feel it.

The heartache.

Spencer's eyes burn holes into my own, and fill them with a sympathy that makes me feel more wounded than comforted.

I wonder then if he can see it on my face; The way I'm trying not to break down and cry... The way I'm only holding myself together by the weak smile I'm wearing, both to assure him that I'm fine and also to feign happiness for my mother, rather than the aching envy and sadness that festers within every crevice of my soul.

I offer to grab more of Mom's things from the car and dart right back out the door to avoid them for a little while. Maybe to also get some fresh air, even though I'd just been outside less than a minute ago.

After flinging open the trunk of the car, I take a deep breath and squeeze my eyes shut, feeling my chest start to tighten at the realization that I might be starting to fall in love with him.

A man who isn't mine, and who could never be.

———

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