#while also tying into fells misdeeds!! and its just so good

[deacf-coffee-is-a-sin]

yall i know im late to the party but u HAVE to read 13 storeys by jonathan sims. holy fucking shit this book was so fucking good

[kit-herondale-carstairs]

You and Me, The Moon and the Tides

Kit drummed the fingers of his free hand against the counter he was sitting on while he held a cookie in the other. It was his third of the morning but the only ones who had to know were him and his stomach. Besides, no one made cookies as well as Julian and Kit was determined to eat as many as possible before Ty came back from whatever he was doing in his old room.

It was still strange sometimes, even after several years, to be back in the Los Angeles Institute. Like he was fifteen again, trying not to mourn his father’s death and getting swept up in the maelstrom that was Ty Blackthorn. Kit finished off his cookie and grabbed another, forcing old memories away with a large bite. He was twenty-two years old, not a teenager anymore, and he definitely didn’t want to spend one of the few days off he had with Ty reminiscing on their awkward, necromantic teen days.

“Julian’s going to be upset you ate all his cookies.” A voice, soft and familiar, spoke out and Kit looked up from where he had been staring at a small crack in a tile to see Ty standing in the doorway, his lynx Irene obediently sitting by his right foot. Kit didn’t know why - probably because his mind was still partially stuck in his old memories - but he couldn’t help but be struck quite suddenly with how beautiful the other man was. He was still slighter than most Nephilim - although he had lost some of the delicacy he had at fifteen - but Kit knew, rather intimately, the strength held in his lithe body. He still had a delicate face framed with the Blackthorn dark hair, but his jaw and cheekbones had become more pronounced as he’d lost the softness of children and his gray eyes were as sharp as ever.

When Kit had first seen him after coming back to America when they were eighteen, he had thought Ty had looked the way avenging Angels should look - austere but beautiful, alluring but dangerous. Beautiful in the way a well-wrought blade was as it glinted in starlight.

Of course, Ty’s appearance had been sharpened with righteous indignation and his clothing had been covered with the still-smoking ichor of the demon he’d dispatched just before he’d caught sight of Kit, and it had mellowed out in the months and years since, as he and Kit worked together to overcome their less-than-stellar past and had begun dating. Now, the Ty standing before Kit was softer. Still devastatingly beautiful, of course, but soft in the way he held his body, all confidence and comfort, in the rumpled nature of the worn gray sweater that Kit was eighty percent sure he’d stolen from the bottom of his own dresser in their bedroom back home. Soft in the tussled mess of his hair that, in a rare fit of spontaneity he hadn’t bothered to comb that morning because “you and the wind are just going to mess it anyway, soft in the way his eyes, brimming as always with sharp intelligence, seemed to always soften when Kit was in sight.

“They were for the twins, you know.” Ty continued, apparently oblivious to Kit’s distracted thoughts, as he strode into the room, Irene slinking behind him lithely. The twins were Helen and Aline’s boys, two fair-head, baby-faced five-year-olds. They were sweet but mischievous little fae boys and Kit knew he was in for finding some unpleasant things on his person throughout his stay now.

But no matter. The cookies were worth it. “I didn’t eat all of them. They don’t need much.” He responded, sliding off the counter and turning to brush the evidence of his misdeeds from its surface and to place the lid back on the glass container. “You ready, then?” He added, turning back to look at Ty. The other man had yet to explain why he had insisted they take a portal from their flat in London back to spend the day in Los Angeles. Especially on a day when apparently everyone was busy with something or another - no one had bothered to explain what they were doing or why the Institute stood empty, a very rare event indeed for the bustling Blackthorn family.

“Yes.” Ty responded, apparently refusing to offer Kit anymore information, before bending down and catching hold of Irene’s harness and clipping her leash onto her. Ty hated leashing her but LA had rules and Kit for one didn’t want to have another run in with a mundane police officer about animal safety laws.

Kit refused to be bothered by Ty’s lack of forthcoming. He was like that, sometimes, when he was coming up with new ideas and they weren’t formed enough to share them yet. There were times when Ty would spend days like that, hyper-focused on thoughts only he was privy to, until they finally came together and Kit would be the first to hear all about his discovery about how a mundane serial killer was actually a very clever demon they needed to kill before their dinner reservation about his plan on how he was going to convince their mundane neighbor, a kindly but nosy older woman, to stop snooping around their trash without traumatizing her.

Kit knew that, given a bit of time, Ty would share all his thoughts and plans with him, and he hardly ever worried anymore that if he was not involved every step of the way, Ty was going to go off and do something dangerous on his own. They were partners and Ty would always wind up sharing his plans before jumping in on the risky parts. They weren’t fun to do alone, anyway, as Ty had often impatiently told him when they had first begun working together again and Kit had often let his old insecurities make him mistrustful of Ty’s quiet periods.

Kit didn’t think their sudden visit to Los Angeles or the three days’ of quiet hyper-fixation from Ty had anything to do with an unsolved mystery or pesky acquaintances, but he knew better than to worry too much about it. He was certain Ty was preparing to share it with him, although why they had to visit the beach or stop by the Institute to pick something up first, Kit had no idea. Ty had never made a habit of making a spectacle out of his discoveries before.

They fell into a companionable silence as Ty lightly tugged on Irene’s leash, deemed it acceptable, and made his way to the back door of the entrance, Kit following half a step behind.

The walk to the beach was as short as Kit remembered, although they hadn’t been back to it since Julian and Emma’s wedding two years before. Establishing themselves at the London Institute - which included repeatedly side-stepping old Bridget’s continued attempts to have a Herondale back as the Head, much to Jem and Tessa’s inconsiderate amusement - working with Kieran, Cristina, and Mark to rebuild Faerieland after the Final War, and working with Alec and the rest of the surviving Nephilim and Downworlders to reconfigure the old laws into something distinctly modern had kept them from making frequent visits to their old haunts.

Time apart, of course, did not make the feel of warm breezes on his face or the salty smell of the sea waves all around him any less familiar and Kit couldn’t help but breathe in deeply, basking in the sun-kissed warmth of his old hometown. He and Ty both missed it, even though it had been years since either had actually lived in the city. It was good to be back, even if Kit still had no idea why they were there.

Ty was no more forthcoming by the shore than he was back at the Institute, and their silence continued even as he led them down the beach, Irene making little disapproving mewls as she trotted across the sand. She hated the feel of sand on her paws, Kit knew, and he wasn’t quite sure why Ty hadn’t left her at home or in the Institute.

Questions about Irene’s quickly fled his mind, however, when several tall rocks came into view and it became quite clear where Ty had led them. It was where they - Kit, Ty, and Livvy - had gone to look at the tide pools, the very first time they’d gone to the beach together. It was also where, after the war was over, they had said their final goodbyes to Livvy. She had decided to move on, once Ty - in her words - no longer needed her, and before the emptiness she had seen in Dimmat Tam had any chance to claim her. She had floated above these very rocks, smiling faintly down at them before turning to go across the sea, disappearing in the waves. Kit had stood wordlessly as Ty watched the waves for an hour afterwards and he had held him tight in the shadow of the rocks, when the silence crested and Ty had begun crying.

They, for very obvious reasons, had not been back.

“Ty…” Kit trailed off questioningly, casting an alarmed look at his boyfriend. But if Ty was being overcome with an onslaught of bittersweet memories, he was hiding it well. The only indicator that Ty was thinking about it at all was the way his jaw seemed to clench briefly.

“Come up with me.” Ty told him, after a moment, stooping briefly to command Irene to stay before dropping her leash into the sand. Then he took to the rock, climbing onto the top with all the ease and grace of someone born to battle. Kit, inwardly wondering what the hell was going on, quickly followed. “The pools are still here,” Ty said as Kit crested the top. There was a pleased tone to his voice. “I was worried they wouldn’t be, since it’s been so hot.”

“We came to Los Angeles because you wanted to visit the tide pools?” Kit asked, careful to make sure his voice didn’t betray all the confusion he felt. Ty didn’t seem to be reminiscing on Livvy too much and he hadn’t broken down again since the day of her departure, although Kit knew all too well that he still felt the dull-ache of her loss.

“It’s the first place we went to on the beach.” Ty said matter-of-factly, carefully turning from the pools to look at Kit. Kit’s breath caught despite himself. Ty was smiling at him softly, his whole body illuminate by the sun so that he seemed to nearly glow in the morning light. “And it’s the last place we saw Livvy. It’s an important place for us, don’t you think?” He continued, still smiling that soft, breathtaking smile. Even though he was still confused, Kit could feel his heartbeat pick up, as though it had figured something out before his mind did. It wasn’t necessarily an unpleasant feeling.

“Yeah. It really is.” Kit answered after a moment. Ty’s smile grew as his eyes - nearly silver in the light - caught Kit’s gaze and held onto it and Kit felt his whole body grow warm in a way that had nothing to do with the sun. Ty didn’t often make eye contact, even after all these years, and Kit’s heart hadn’t ceased to pick up whenever he did. Privately, Kit hoped it never did.

“It’s a bittersweet place,” Ty continued, voice still matter-of-fact. “But it’s where I feel closest to Livvy, and I wanted her to be here for this, even if it’s just in my mind.” Kit was still unsure what “this” was but he was starting to get an idea. They had spoken about it, of course, at great length because Ty didn’t want to do anything without a clear plan, but he hadn’t thought it would be anytime soon. He hadn’t thought Ty would beat him to it.

“Ty…” he said again, his voice suddenly breathless, eyes wide. Ty just shook his head.

“Let me speak, please. You’ve always been the one good at putting your thoughts into words, I’d like to be the one to do that for a change.” Kit nearly laughed - trust Ty to be so official in a moment like this. But then Ty swooped down, his knee hitting the ground with a soft thud, and Kit quite suddenly couldn’t find the breath to even gasp. In complete, shocked silence, Kit let Ty take his hand into his own, staring down rapturously at his boyfriend’s face.

“You once told me, in a ring of fire, that you loved me.” Ty began, his pale fingers softly tracing the mark on Kit’s wrist that he’d made years ago. Kit really didn’t think he needed a reminder of that particular memory at this moment but Ty continued on before he could say anything, no doubt sensing Kit’s inherent sarcasm defense rearing up. “I didn’t know, then, what those words meant. I knew, logically, what others meant when they said them to me, but I really didn’t get it. Actions always made more sense to me - Julian giving me toys to fidget with so Diana didn’t get mad at me in lessons, Livvy learning how to use a computer with me so we could solve mysteries together, Dru inviting me to one of her movies even though she knew I was just going to talk about all the inaccuracies. 

Actions were how I knew my family loved me. So when you said them, I didn’t understand. And then you left, and I really didn’t understand. We weren’t talking anymore, and that was one of the worst moments of my life. I had Livvy back, but I lost you. Then you sent me your mother’s necklace. We weren’t talking, weren’t friends, but you’d heard that Livvy and I were struggling and you sent me that necklace. And I understood then, I think, what you’d meant. But I thought it was too late - you were gone and you didn’t answer the letter I sent. 

And then, before I knew it, years had gone by without you. And it was strange, how long it took for me to get used to you not being by me, even though we hadn’t known each other long. And then you came back, and it was like - like the sun coming out after a cloudy day. I had been living fine in shadows but suddenly it was warm and bright again. I thought it would take us awhile to get back to what we had, I was angry - you were wary. But being around you was like reciting the alphabet, it came easy and natural. And when you kissed me that first time in Faerie, when we thought we were going to die, I finally, really understood. And when I told you I loved you on the last battlefield, I meant it. I’ll always mean it. 

The world may not always work in ways that make sense to me. Sometimes it’s too loud. Sometimes words have no meaning and sometimes people say things I’m somehow supposed to get but it’s just’s nonsense. But you, you’ve always made sense to me. I don’t believe in soulmates and destiny, and all those weird true love things that show up in those cheesy movies you like, but I believe in you and I believe in us. Because we make sense. It’s like -” here Ty stopped, just for a moment. He seemed to be struggling for the right analogy, which was frankly shocking because he had been doing admirably well so far, for someone who claimed not be good with words. 

“It’s like you’re the moon and I’m the tides. Without you, I feel strangely weightless sometimes, like I’m moving without purpose. But you draw me towards you, you bring rhythm to my life that keeps me grounded. You draw me back when I’m going too far - when I’m running three days without sleep, you get me into bed even if you have to lay on me like a weighted blanket until I fall asleep.” Kit had only had to do that once, and it had been after a record-breaking two weeks of no sleep except exhausted cat naps right after the war had ended, but Kit wasn’t about to correct him right then. He was finding it hard enough to even hear Ty over the sound of his thudding heart and it was getting hard to look at the other man through a sudden clouding of his eyes that he would later fully admit was the beginnings of tears.

 “And you draw me forward when I need to go - you make it easy to bear when the world gets too loud and even though I can be difficult, you never leave me behind. You are endlessly patient, you are kind and generous, and you are just so good that sometimes it’s overwhelming. But I don’t ever want to draw away from you, I want to be by your side through everything that comes our way. I love you, Kit Herondale. I love you, I love you, I love you and I want to keep loving you.” Through blurry eyes, Kit watched as Ty, with one hand still holding tight to Kit’s, put his other hand to his mouth and whistle lowly over the stone. Within moments, Irene had leaped lightly onto the stone and Kit noticed, rather stupidly, for the first time that there was something gleaming dangling around the clasp of Irene’s leash. It was a ring, of course. Kit’s tears continued to flow more freely as Ty reached over and carefully unclasped her leash, catching the ring one-handed because Kit was now holding his other hand far too tightly to pull away. 

Ty turned back to Kit then and held out the ring. “If you’d let me.” His voice was a whisper, then but Kit heard it easily enough even above the roar of the waves behind them. He was attuned to Ty so completely that he would have heard the whisper anywhere, over anything. 

“Are you fucking kidding?” Kit practically yelled and Ty nearly flinched in surprise. “You’re bad with words? I’m actually crying right now, you - you jerk! What the fuck!” Kit’s rather harsh words - and really, could anyone blame him? he hadn’t expected this when Ty had woken him up that morning- were completely undermined by him dropping down to his knees and swooping Ty into a tight embrace. He couldn’t think of how to put his swirling thoughts into words so he settled for what Ty understood best - he pressed his lips firmly against his and kissed him soundly. 

He still couldn’t think of how to say what Ty made him feel - loved and cherished and happy, always so very happy, were some of them but they weren’t enough to explain how he felt, weren’t powerful enough to encompass even half of his emotions. But he could say one word and, at that particular moment, it was the perfect word to say. 

“Yes,” he murmured against his fiancee’s lips. “Yes, yes, yes.” 

This is also posted on AO3 under GinnyRose.