#why whywhy what the fuck what have i done? why do i deserve this? i know i do thats the only explanation why my life is so shitty like this
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#i hate it i hate the way i am so badly#tw vent#vent tw#cw vent#eijrfdngmksdwjnrfgdmfksdlaweqjrgdnfmksajirwnjgefmskd#i fucking hate myself so soso much#god fuck everything fucking#fuck#i hate the way i am i haate that my instinct all the time whenever something bad happens to me is to blame myself or blame menial things l#likd rituals i get to do#i hate that things suck here in this fucking city but things suck so much more back home and i just#i fucing ahte hate it all i fucking hate HATE IT I HATE IT SO MUCH#i just wanna be happy why cant i just be fucking happy#why whywhy what the fuck what have i done? why do i deserve this? i know i do thats the only explanation why my life is so shitty like this#but why. why do i deserve it why does it fucking suck why cant i be happy? there are wors epoeple than meout there im sure but why do they#hy do they get to feel happy and not having panic attacks on the daily and why am i stuck living like this?#why can t i jsut be fucking happy.
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