#with a few people hearing it and coming to the internet to spill their findings i very much believe that couldve been the same

[teratosfavouritesnack]

witchcraft - demon summoning - suggestive themes

You've been so lonely for far too long. You're tired to be on your own. The yearning you feel for a loving hand, a passionate embrace is overwhelming and it grows heavier day by day. You've come to a point where you can't go on with your day without breaking down, disheartened by the lack of companionship in your life. You feel pathetic... but you also know you can't go on like this any longer.

People have disappointed you far too many times you'd bear to count. You've lost faith in them; in finding a good lover, a partner for life among men. That's why you eventually decide to rely on the dark arts to fill your loneliness and quench your desire.

You've been meddling with spells for a few months now. You wouldn't call yourself a witch exactly, not yet at least, but you're not a total newbie either. It was quite easy for you to find the spell suited for your not so peculiar situation, and although it requires a level of expertise much higher than what you possess, you decide to give it a try anyway. You need to give it a try. What's the worst thing that could happen? It all might simply misfire and you'll end up all alone again. That's what you dread the most.

You gather all you need for the spell and prepare yourself for the moment that could possibly - hopefully - change your life forever. Sitting cross-legged on the floor of your room, you scatter pictures you've gathered from magazines and the Internet on the ground; they portray all kind of people with physical traits you find beautiful and attractive, traits you'd like your companion to have. Then you add a handful of herbs - cinnamon, dandelions, hibiscus, ginger, lemon balm - and a piece of clay, before you shuffle all the ingredients together. The second step is to chant your purposes. And so you sing at the top of your lungs putting your whole heart into it. Your purposes are sincere and deeply felt. You're sure the spirits will sense that and will grant your wishes. You're sure of it.

The flames from the candles placed all around your room start to tremble, casting elongated shadows along the four walls. You can hear disembodied voices chanting back at you. You can feel them inside you, rising, growing, demanding something. They don't speak your language and yet, you know precisely what they ask of you. To fully bond the companion to you, you must mark it, claim it, make it yours. You need to put your very essence into it. And so, without hesitation, your hand slides under your dress, coming into direct contact with your already dripping wet folds. You came prepared to not waste time. You gather your fluids and then drag your slick fingers all over the pictures. Then you collect saliva in your mouth and spit it out on the clay. Lastly, you grab a pin and draw a drop of blood from the pad of your finger, spilling it on the herbs. Once you've smeared your bodily fluids all over the ingredients, you close your eyes and resume your chanting. It only takes a minute until you hear the voices answer once again. They sound louder this time; booming voices that reverberate through your ribcage making you shudder, but not in fear. A smile blooms on your face, your body tingling all over. It's such a pervasive and elated sensation... almost like an orgasm.

The flames of the candles tremble again, harder than before; you can see them dancing on the walls through your closed eyelids. The air around you grows dense. The room seems to move, as if you're stumbling through the dark, intoxicated and almost blinded. Your chest tightens and you feel like you can't breathe anymore. There's no oxygen in the room. It's like everything is on stand-by, waiting for something to happen. For someone to come. Your body shakes, lungs straining, screaming for air. Your eyes snap open and you watch wide-eyed as the room spins all around you, faster, faster, until it abrutly stops, blowing out the candles and leaving you nauseous and dizzy.

A shuddering and loud gasp falls from your mouth as you find yourself able to breathe again. Your hands collide with the floor before you as you quiver and pant heavily. You're sure you almost got yourself killed. Something must have gone wrong, you must have made a mistake at some point... You don't know! You can't see anything, you can't hear anything. You grope blindly at the mess you made to cast the spell; the clay is still just a piece of clay. It should have changed by now! Moulded into the spitting image of your perfect partner. But instead... everything is as it was. It didn't work... You almost died for nothing. You can feel your thoat clenching, your eyes stinging with upcoming tears... It didn't work.

But then... you see something that makes you freeze. Two glowing eyes staring at you from the darkness. They stand low in a corner of the room just opposite you and almost look feline-like. For a moment you think you might have crafted a pet companion instead and you feel some relief in that notion. But that relief is quickly replaced by horror as you hear a grave warm voice booming from the darkness and turning your blood to ice.

"Is it you? Are you the mortal who summoned me?"

"S-s-summoned?" Your voice is as thin as a sheet of paper as you echo back the word. There was no mention of summoning or anything related to that in your spell. Well, not that you remember of... "I wasn't... I didn't-"

The eyes glow brighter as the voice cracks into a laugh, seemingly amused by your reaction.

"You reek of ignorance and..." You hear sniffling. "Foolishness."

You watch paralysed as the eyes start to ascend, rising higher and higher, until they come to hover at least two meters from the floor. What is that?

The voice laughs again, mockingly. "What's the matter? Why so shocked? You haven't seen anything yet, my dear fool."

So it sees you. Whatever that is, it can see you through the pitch black darkness that has swallowed up your room. You have no words. No words to describe what's happening right in front of your eyes. This isn't what should have happened. This is far from the idyllic ending you prospected. Your beautiful, perfectly crafted lover should be standing before you now, ready to cherish you, adore you, worship you...

"I'm afraid you made one too many mistakes to hope to attach your frivolous fantasies on me."

You're speechless. Frozen in terror. Barely able to breathe.

What have you done?

What have you... summoned?"

You can't see it, but you can feel it. You can feel the energy coming off of it. It's powerful. Way more powerful than you. You can't even compare to it.

The glowing eyes seem to silently appraise you, staring straight at you as they hover by the ceiling. You feel bare under such an intese and probing gaze. It's as if it can read your every thought, your every secret, your every desire. It's like it knows you, everything about you. But you don't know anything about it.

"You did manage to do something right, however." It announces, its tone still laced with the taunting edge it had before. "The hardest thing to accomplish, nonetheless."

You jolt as the eyes seem to come closer, to approach you. If you weren't already sitting down, you're sure you would have dropped on the floor by now.

"You... bonded me to you. Marked me. Claimed me. I am yours!" the voice booms, echoing through the room and sending your heart into a frenzy.

"You can't command me." It adds, its tone less harsh but stomach-churning nonetheless. "However, I will serve you."

You gulp as the eyes move even closer, so close that you have to crane your neck up, unable - even if willing - to tear your wide-eyed gaze away. You're not sure what it's saying. Its words make little to no sense to your fuzzy mind. You can even barely hear past your thundering heartbeat. But you believe you picked up on something; apparently, you didn't completely mess it all up. In your ignorance, your foolishness and hastiness, you managed to bond this... creature to you even though you won't have any control over it like you would have had on a clay dummy brought to life. This is a sentient being who will willingly - as much as a summoned creature might still be able to willingly do anything - serve you.

Gods. You can't wrap your mind around this intricate mess... You screwed up, that really goes without saying.

"H-How?" You manage to stutter out in a whisper, finding your voice again, even if only a thread of it. Despite your wobbling legs you're able to pull yourself up and stand somewhat still in front of the dark. "The bond... I mean... How did I manage to...?"

The glowing eyes follow your every move, twinkling slightly in... amusement? Scorn? Disdain? Surprise? You wish you knew.

"Your essence." it answers, placidly. Its tone so warm it nearly has you melting in a puddle. "It was too sweet, too delicious. Powerful." Its voice grows agitated as it adds, "I can still taste it on my tongue."

You gulp. Your essence...? Your... bodily fluids. On its tongue. Too sweet? Too delicious?

Oh.

You can clearly feel it. Yes, rising in your belly. A hot fizzling sensation starting to pool there. It's different than usual. It's a mix. A potent, overwhelming mix of fear and arousal.

You hear that sniffling again and before you have time to react, you find yourself engulfed by darkness, clenched in an unvisible but very tangible grasp. A low rumbling growl vibrates against your chest, reverbereting through your stomach and settling straight in your core.

The glowing eyes are mere inches away from your face now. They bore right through you, sending thrills coursing along your spine. How you're still managing to breathe and mantain your consciousness is beyond you.

The creature sniffles again. Your eyelids flutter and your breathing falters as you feel something akin to a warm breath tingling the side of your neck.

"I am driven by it." It whispers upon your skin, making every hair stand on end. Your knees buckle under you, your body shuddering in ...pleasure? Terror? You can't separate the two anymore. You can only focus on the clench tightening around you as if to support you, and on the wet feeling of something long and forked lapping at your neck, traveling along your collarbones, up your throat, stopping just a breath from your mouth. Your soul has positively left your body.

You're but putty in the darkness' hold.

"I will need to feed on it. Every day. Until your last breath."

Claws settle at the nape of your neck, scraping at your scalp and tangling in your hair while keeping your head still.

"But..."

The forked tongue trails the outline of your quivering bottom lip, making your breath hitch. The glowing hypnotic eyes seem to brighten even harder, filled with pure hunger as they stare down at you.

"Let's start with now..."

🪷. You can leave me a tip on ko-fi if you want to support me

[pedrostylez]

How The Crow Flies - pt. 8

Javier Peña x fem!reader x Frankie Morales crossover

Word count: 3.4k

Chapter Summary: You return to the apartment Javier set you up in, and find him waiting for you

Chapter Warnings and Disclaimers: 18+ only. I am not responsible for what you read on the internet. You have been warned! Locations and descriptions of places may be inaccurate in comparison to each story (Narcos and Triple Frontier). Timelines are obviously different between the two stories, so we are going to meet in the middle and say we are in the early 2000s. These are not necessarily canon characters in regard to how they act, how they treat people, and their current relationships. Hurt feelings, mentions of violence, hitting, slapping, mean words (again we got a Capricorn reader who maybe feels bad for putting Javi in this situation) mentions of fucking others, some jealousy, Javi big time emotionally damaged, shower fingering sort of smut as a way to make it up to reader, DUBCON mentions and references

A/N: Thank you guys for being patient. Honestly, February has been one of the worst months ever for me on a personal level, and so writing has both been difficult and all I would rather do. I'm thinking about how best to write the next 2 chapters, and part of me thinks I can really just have it be 1 more...we will see! If I have missed any tags for trigger warnings, please let me know and I will fix it. Thank you for reading!!!

Taglist: @thevoiceinyourheadx @suzdin @survivingandenduring @bariskaplans @inept-the-magnificent @casa-boiardi @paleidiot @darkheartgatita @missladym1981 @mellymbee

It’s all mostly a blur.

Driving up to the apartment and noticing Javier’s vehicle parked in the driveway. The tuft of his hair poking over the top of his seat, lolled to one side as if he was asleep. 

The sun on your face as you slide sunglasses over your eyes, warming your skin as you unlock the front door. 

The way Javier’s car door shuts behind him, calling your name and following you into the apartment. It’s like you barely hear him call your name as he trails you up to the doorway.

Staring at Javier and seeing only Frankie, wondering what he is doing in the moment is the only thing you can think about. The ghost feeling of Frankie’s lips on yours as he whispered a goodbye to you just a few hours ago. His smile as he pulled you back to him, telling you to not come back to the jungle unless it was to “ruin these assholes’ day.” The way his thumb and finger pinched gently at your chin when you rolled your eyes; the way he couldn’t stop looking at your mouth until he finally leaned in to kiss you again. 

You couldn’t get those things out of your head. Swirling, swirling, swirling around as you walked around your apartment and began sliding things into cardboard boxes. 

The way Javier asks where you have been doesn’t really register. 

No, nothing is really memorable until his fingers grasp around your wrist and spin you around to face him. His eyes, not trained on your face but on your shirt, welling with tears. “What happened to you?”

It was all just noise until he says that. You blink, shaking your head and pulling your wrist out of his grip. He follows you, hesitant but determined as he speaks again. “Please, hermosa I-I’ve been so worried–”

“You blew my cover.” It spills out of your mouth, holding your hand up toward his chest to silently tell him to stop moving. 

He pauses, visibly paling and mouth agape like a fish. It was hard to surprise him–you had come to know that over the months of working with him. Right now, you have somehow done so, his eyes searching yours desperately for an answer. 

He blindly is reaching for the wall behind him, his knuckles flushing white as he squeezes at the door frame his hand landed on. “What?” He hiccups, looking you over and eyes continuously going to your shirt-over and over and over. 

You set the cardboard box down in your hands-half full of the trinkets he had told you to decorate with. You have this urge to suddenly go back to your own apartment. “You called me so many times that I was cornered, and I had to say who I was to not have my neck sliced open.”

It feels like a bit of an exaggeration at this moment, especially after this morning with Frankie. But it is the truth-you do not doubt that if you hadn’t said who you were, that Frankie would have killed you in that moment. 

Javier’s eyes flash back to your shirt again, and you finally look down. You find your shirt stained with dried blood, likely from the cuts that Frankie put there. “Did…d-did you get hurt?” His voice is barely above a whisper, hands releasing the door frame to run through his hair.  

You look back down to the task at hand, placing drinking glasses into the box. This overwhelming feeling of annoyance starts to course through you, hands beginning to shake as you stack each glass. The clinking, the piercing sound of glass on glass starts to rub at your bones unpleasantly. 

You close your eyes to try and recenter yourself, Javier’s pleas fading to the background again as he asks more questions. A loud crash has you opening your eyes again, glass shattered at your feet from where you’ve missed the box. Breaths come heavy, your chest rising and falling more rapidly as your anger comes to a head. “I had a fucking knife held to my throat because of you.” 

It comes barreling out of your mouth, the same way you said your cover was blown, but more angry. You’ve whirled around to him, clenching your jaw and lifting a shaking finger. “And it’s your fucking fault!”

Javier shakes his head adamantly, sniffling and blinking rapid to hold back tears. Brokenly, he asks for you to wait, to hold on before flying completely off the handle. 

You can’t help how you’re still shaking with anger, stepping forward to give Javi a shove to step away from you. “You called me so many times that I was backed into a corner, had a knife held to my throat!”

“Please, baby you weren’t coming home–”

“I had to say I was DEA! This is your fault! You called when Frankie–”

“Frankie?” His hands have clasped around your wrists now, the sadness and worry swiped away from his face in an instant. You realize your mistake, naming Frankie out loud as the person that discovered who you were, instead of one of the security guards. “What the fuck was Frankie doing keeping you an extra day? What were you doing together?”

You scoff, attempting to pull away from him but his grip tightens. Javi’s eyes are wild with anger, searching for answers he still can’t seem to find. “That’s none of your fucking business.”

“It is my fucking business when you’re getting threatened by some drug addict that was practically fired out of his little squad he was in with Santiago Pope.” He snarls, releasing your wrists and looking around your apartment, pacing. “Really? None of my concern? Are you fucking serious right now?”

“I’ve gotten a lot of information from him.” You attempt to sound secure in your answer, clearing your throat to have it come out louder than before. You didn’t know that about Frankie. “He wouldn’t have known or found out if you hadn’t been calling me over and over.”

Javi has the audacity to begin laughing, scratching at the back of his neck and glaring in your direction. “What, do you keep me as ‘PENA DEA’ on that phone? Are you that fucking stupid?” He’s reaching into his back pocket for his cigarettes and lighting one, blowing smoke directly in your face to piss you off.

You reel back, surprise overtaking your insecurity about Frankie’s past with another slew of anger.  “Are you stupid enough to call me over and over and not think that maybe I was busy gathering information? Like that maybe they are getting raided today? Right now!”

Javi stubs out the cigarette on the counter, watching the plastic burn slightly before throwing it into the sink. “Right now?” He asks, watching your single nod in defiance. He runs his hands through his hair again, not able to hold back the groan of frustration.  “And you didn’t think to come back sooner? To call me on the way? You waited until you were here?”

“They aren’t after what we’re after–”

“Stechner has been on my ass since I’ve had you on this. He’s sniffing around for a mistake, and you’re prancing around being an actual fucking whore?” He yells, face heated and eyes wide to take you in. 

And what can you do, exactly? Lie and have it be another argument? Not say the truth and have him know that you have, in fact, been sleeping with your own informant? Instead of a shrug, or an apology, or an admittance, you pull out the only thing in your arsenal that you can think of. “How is that any different than what you did before?”

He shouts as if pained by your words, hunching over himself before standing straight to point a finger at you. “I can’t believe you!” 

Now it’s your turn to laugh, your hand rubbing at your forehead.  “What were you actually fucking expecting right now, Javi? You asked me to sleep around with men for information that wasn’t even part of an active mission. And then you blew my cover, and had the audacity to yell at me!” You screech back. 

When he doesn’t respond immediately you’re back to pushing him, wanting him out of your space. You want him to leave, to leave you alone.

To his credit, Javier takes your shoves, your slaps, and only closes his eyes to breathe deeply through his nose. You wonder briefly if you are going to leave a bruise on him. 

He opens his eyes and stares at you, waiting patiently for your shoves to reduce to almost nothing. When he speaks it comes out calm, ready to try again. “You could have called me. Before you stayed the extra night, after he held a knife to your throat-you should have called me if you needed me.”

If you needed me. “I don’t need you.”

The pain in his eyes is apparent, reaching for you again to hold you steady against him. He furrows his brows, shaking his head and desperate to get his point across to you. “You don’t get it.”

You shut your eyes, refusing to look at him. He gives you a small shake, sighing deeply.”You don’t understand how terrified I was? After we fought you haven’t spoken to me, or called me back and I’ve been barely holding it together.” You go to interrupt him, but he continues. “I thought I lost you last night. Thought you were trapped, or hurt and…I shouldn’t have called you so much that it put you in danger, but if you had just told me what was going on–”

He sighs heavily, clasping a hand around the back of your neck to hold you still as his forehead presses to yours. “I need you.” A whimper bubbles out of your chest, listening to his rough swallow. “This isn’t about the money, or the side mission. I need you; do you understand?”

You open your eyes, watering and wide as you stare him down. You’re searching, trying to see if he’s lying. “You can’t guilt trip me.”

Javier holds his breath, pulling you impossibly closer. Your chest is pressed to his, and you’re sure that he can feel your heartbeat through the layers of clothing, pounding. “I’m not. Please, hermosa hear me.” 

It’s quiet between you, your breath puffing over his face in humid clouds. You soften slowly, tension leaving your body until you’re leaning all your weight against him. You can’t help it; you’re trying to understand. He was concerned, worried, not thinking as a boss, but as someone that cares for you. He sighs, wrapping his arms around your shoulders to hold you close to him. “I thought I lost you, baby. I’m sorry.”

You’re silent for a while longer, nodding when you finally decide. “I’m sorry.” You whisper against his chest, hands grabbing at the fabric. “I should have called you back.”

Javi hums, rubbing his hand down your spine gently. You pull away from him, sniffling and looking up to his face. “There’s a whole team of them…just raiding the place for money. There won’t be any proof they were there.”

Javier nods, pressing a kiss to your forehead in acceptance. “Let them take the money.”

Javier ushered you out of the apartment quickly, packing what boxes you’ve started into the back of his car and promising to stop by at a later time to get the rest of it. 

He’s such a fuck up. 

He thought he could handle this months ago, when he first met you and got you involved in this side mission. He thought that you would give some intel, they would do a raid, and that would be the end of it. 

He was sorely mistaken. 

You’re next to him in his car as he pulls away from the apartment, and his hand slips over yours. You’re stiff for a moment before looking over at him and sighing, squeezing his fingers in reassurance. “You’ll never have to do that again.” He promises, and he’s not sure if he’s promising never to do undercover again, or to being away from him. 

He doesn’t want to define it in case you don’t want the latter. 

Javi keeps quiet when you don’t respond, squeezing the meat of your palm in his and rushing to his own apartment. He hadn’t told you explicitly but he was not going to leave you alone to your own devices; the dried blood on your shirt had him spiraling enough that he wanted to watch over you tonight. 

He has so many things he wants to say, but none of them come out as he unlocks his door and takes your bag for you. He wants to ask if you’re actually okay, if this is what you expected, if you were still mad at him. Were you just appeasing him to stop arguing, or were you genuinely sorry? What happened with Frankie beyond a knife to your throat that made you not tell him what was going on?

None of it comes out as you tell him quietly that you are going to take a shower. He just nods, watching you step away from him and shut the door softly behind you. No, nothing comes out of his mouth until a few minutes later after the water has started, that he hears deep breaths and sniffles echoing off the tile. 

He didn’t want to push you, but the sound of you crying was something he couldn’t handle. It urged him forward, lightly knocking on the door and calling your name. When you don’t respond he opens the door, eyes falling to your defeated figure in the stream of water. 

“Are you alright, hermosa?” He asks, watching as you step away from the water to glance at him. Your eyes are red, waterlogged and shivering as you nod at him. 

“Y-yes. Yeah.” You sniffle, shaking the water from your head and attempting to cover yourself. “I’m fine.”

Javier pauses, stepping forward to close the bathroom door behind him. It’s hot in the bathroom, humid clouds floating from the shower head to him and fogging the mirror. It makes it harder to breathe, but he doesn’t mind if he gets to be closer to you. Javier observes you, not letting his eyes wander much until you face him fully. He can’t help but let his eyes fall to the neat lines across your chest and collarbone, red and angry staring back at him. “What’s that?”

You look down like you weren’t aware you had cuts on your chest, dumbfounded for a moment before you give a noncommittal shrug. “Just a few scratches.”

Javi shakes his head, stepping toward the glass shower door and popping it open. A closer look is all he tells himself, just to inspect that they are fine and that you won’t die from bleeding out in the middle of the night, or of infection at a later date.

His hand reaches out tentatively, running his finger across one of the marks and looking up to your face to watch for a reaction. When you don’t have one, he sighs and let’s his eyes settle on yours. “I’m sorry.” He whispers, his thumb drifting up to the skin covering your pulse, rubbing back and forth as soothingly as possible. 

“You don’t need to be.” you say just as quietly, lifting a hand and resting it on his chest. The water on your hand seeps through his shirt, leaving a hot brand on his skin.

Javi’s throat closes, emotions running high. “I should have protected you.”

You shake your head, chastising him. “There was nothing more you could have done, Javi.”

He winces, pressing himself further against you. His shirt is fully soaked now, but he doesn’t care. “I shouldn’t have let you go in the jungle.”

“It’s okay, Javi.” You pat at his chest, pulling your hand away as if you’re only just now realizing that you’ve gotten his clothing wet. His own covers yours, bringing it back to the imprint you’ve left–he wants to feel you against him.

“Please, forgive me.” He begs; he knows he’s begging. He doesn’t beg as far as he is concerned, but something in him is crumbling. He leans forward and presses his lips to your skin, above your brow, your cheekbone, your jaw. He breathes heavily in your ear, shutting his eyes tightly.

He feels your slight nod, a quiet “I forgive you, Javi.” and he’s choked up with tears. He’s rushing to join you in the shower, a couple buttons popping off his shirt as it slides down his arms, your fingers going for the button of his jeans. 

Once he’s fully naked and pressed against you, the water is beating down on his back, your fingers drawing gentle shapes up his spine and his face resting against your shoulder. If he opens his eyes, he can see the cuts directly in front of him, and it makes him shutter more. “I’ll make it right, I promise.”

“There’s nothing to make right.” You sigh, tapping with only your index finger as you think. “We’ll raid Lorea, and it will be over.”

He nods, pressing his lips to your collarbone and feeling the mark from Frankie’s knife. He wants to punch himself for not telling you sooner about what he found out. About how Fransisco Morales was a drug addict, that he was not mentally in the right place the last time he was in the military. It feels suffocating, knowing that you had been around him, speaking to him, fucking him. 

How did it all go so wrong?

His hands drift from your shoulder blades, down to your hips and give you a squeeze. “Let me make it up to you.” He gruffs, finally making eye contact with you. He sees your confusion, your sudden realization of what he means.

“You…you don’t have to.” You say quietly, letting his fingers drift to the curve of your stomach. Watching him, carefully assessing. 

“I want to. If you want me to?” He watches your pupils blow wide, interest peaking as his thumb brushes through the patch of hair above your center, moving down, down, down. 

You sigh heavily, swallowing and nodding again. Javier is convinced that if he can make you feel good like he knows he can, then maybe you’ll actually start to forgive him. Even if it’s slowly. His fingers drift between your folds, up and down as lightly as possible. You squirm against him, spreading your legs just enough to let his knee hold one to the side. 

Javi looks down, leaning a bit away to get a better look at you while his other hand is still wrapped around the back of your neck, soothing circles into your jaw. “You’re so pretty, baby.” Javier growls through clenched teeth, letting a finger swipe quick circles over your clit. 

You pant, reaching a hand out to his bicep and squeezing. No response, just the acknowledgement of your moan is all that he needs. 

A single finger is pressed into you, curling over and over as his eyes flick back up to yours. He’s desperate to watch you unfold, feel you pulse around a finger, anything to give him the approval, the want that he desires. 

You’re quick to finish, his thumb brushing back and forth over your clit while his finger curls inside of you, his eyes on yours as he talks you to completion. “So fucking perfect, in my place, taking what you want from me.” He whispers, pressing his lips to yours as if to seal the deal between you. 

When he pulls away, your eyes opening and half lidded in exhaustion, he reaches for the shower knob and turns it off. Javi helps you out of the shower, drying the both of you efficiently before guiding you into his bedroom where he’s already placed out clothes for you to sleep in. “I’ll be in the kitchen, if you need something, okay? Get some rest.”

He waits for your small smile and nod, hanging by the door for a moment to see his shirt fall over your torso before heading to the kitchen. He planned to stay up for the rest of the evening and through the night, planning this raid on Lorea and letting you finally get some rest. 

[chosos-mascara]

｡˚۰˚☽ K I N K T O B E R D A Y 17 ☽˚۰˚｡

Camboy (Part 2) - Giyu Tomioka

read part one here

cw: masturbation, exhibitionism, getting caught, creampie

Unable to stop yourself watching his content, you find out Giyu had used something of yours for one of his videos.

minors+ageless dni. 3.9k words

It hadn't just been a one time thing. 

You'd told yourself, you'd believed yourself when thinking you wouldn't do it again; it was just a heated moment of misjudgment, a thrill you'd found yourself partaking in. When coming down from the climax you'd given yourself that night, you slept a little restless, though found comfort in knowing you wouldn't partake in something so perverse again. He was your roommate, after all. 

But late at night, you'd toss and turn, an ache between your legs you found yourself unable to extinguish, even with all the filth you'd be able to find on the internet; nothing gave you the electrifying buzz of watching Giyu's videos, knowing he was only a room away from you. You'd become intoxicated by the way his body jerked against himself, the way his hips had swayed as he relieved himself from all pent up frustrations and anger in the world; cumming with whimpers and gasps leaving him, all while being documented and uploaded onto the site.

Closing your eyes you'd find yourself clenching around empty space, unable to help the need tto hear his groans again, watching his seed spill onto his own hands, or the flesh-light you'd become accustomed to through viewing his videos, previously unaware of its existence within your home. Your favourite videos had come to be the ones involving pillows, his thrusts into the folded cushions becoming weaker, voice strained as he spilled into the creases of the fabric. When he'd posted the video, your heart had fluttered, remembering how his duvet had been hanging up to dry in the lounge of your home, knowing that he'd had to wash his sheets due to his cum coating them. 

It had been a month since his account had been brought to your attention, and with the two new additions he'd added shortly after your discovery, you'd had to have watched each video multiple times, now able to memorize your favourite parts from each video, your thoughts throughout the day tainted with the obsession over the black haired male you'd lived with.

You'd engaged in a little more conversation with him, making an effort to wedge yourself into his life, even if small steps at first. When passing in the hall, you'd stopped pressing yourself against the wall to avoid coming into contact with him, instead edging slightly closer as to feel his arm slip over yours, or from time to time, knocking on his door and asking if he wanted to come to the store with you, or join you on a study session in the library. 

He'd decline most of the time, being a recluded male, but your heart raced on the few times he'd taken up your offer, usually to get himself a snack or two while you'd done a small grocery haul, the pair of you enjoying the comfortable silence you'd shared while walking down isles. 

You'd done well to hide the way being in his presence had made you feel; he was like a celebrity to you, but had been none-the-wiser of your own indulgences. When his blue eyes peered over you, your knees grew weak, an innate throb at your core as you'd been able to recall each sound that would tumble from his lips while in his most intimate moments. Giyu hadn't any idea that his anonymity had been breached by you, though you'd never tell a soul about it. If you had, you'd also be admitting to borderline perving on him, and give up on the thrill of knowing something he'd been so oblivious to. He'd stated in his bio that he'd gotten off to the thought of people watching him, which would always replay in your mind when watching one of his videos for the umpteenth time. 

Once eating dinner, and settling into bed, your routine hadn't quite ended yet. Grabbing the new vibrator from your nightstand (due to the amount you'd been using the old one, you'd felt it had been deserved), you brought it to parted legs, ready to finish the night before sleeping. Thankfully, Giyu had been out with a friend, so you'd had the house to yourself. 

You opened up your phone browser, searching his username into the bar and eagerly hitting 'search', pressing onto the profile. All dignity had left you at this point, and you'd fully accepted your actions each night, no longer locking and unlocking your phone in anticipation, guilt riddling you as you'd thought of actually doing it again. Instead, this was just a part of your day. It's possible your speed at discarding all morality had been alarming, choosing to chase an orgasm over actually considering if your actions were correct in a societal sense, but at this point, you were past caring. 

Clicking the videos tab, you clicked at the toy, waiting until the buffering screen had subsided to actually place it onto yourself, but once you'd skimmed over a new addition to the channel, you'd bolted upright. Were your eyes deceiving yourself? A new video, only thirty seconds long, filmed in portrait instead of his usual landscape angle, his erection in the thumbnail from his own point of view. Usually he'd had the phone propped up on something, and taken an artsier format, but this had been purely to capture a moment he didn't want to forget. The title - 

'cumming on my roommates panties' 

Mouth ajar, you sat in awe, thumb hovering over the video. You'd turned the vibrator off as you'd used both hands to steady your shaking phone in your grip, heart racing against chest. Eyes moving over the title again, and again, you'd let the idea marinate for a few seconds. Surely, it had been staged, he'd probably bought a pair of underwear from the local department store and used this as a rouse for the video; a risque title earning a few extra views.

Clicking, you waited for the image to load in. The short interval between tapping the video and it coming onto the screen had felt like a minute, but had probably been only a second or two. It began, and you searched over his torso, eyes resting on the erection he'd been stroking, his hand moving slightly to hold pink cotton over the end of his cock, hips jerking forward as he came into them. 

You were in locked position, watching events that had already occurred, playing aloud the breathless gasps commentating his orgasm, before bringing them away from himself to show to his phone camera; evidence to his claim on your clothing before ending the video. 

You weren't sure how to react to the content you'd just set your eyes upon. It was highly unlikely he'd guessed you were watching his videos, which left the conclusion that Giyu had felt some sort of desire toward you - desire that you'd reciprocated. Collecting your thoughts, you'd been left to wonder on the whereabouts of said garment. You swallowed, standing and pulling up your pyjama bottoms, deciding that today, your orgasm would be due to a physical part of Giyu - not just a video recording. He was out, and you'd had a good guess that he'd have held onto the underwear, knowing that if he'd have washed them, there was a chance you'd have seen, and questioned why they'd been in the machine at the same time as his own clothing. 

Maybe it had been more wishful thinking than anything, wanting him o have held onto the soaked piece of fabric as it would prove to you he'd had a little more interest in you than one, fleeting moment. Rather, an attraction to you. 

Thus, your mission began. You rushed to his bedroom, ready to complete your desire as quickly as possible, before the boy would return home. He'd already been gone an hour, so you'd presumed you'd had another hour at minimum to find your high, and return the panties to their resting place before he'd arrived back at the apartment. 

You glanced over the furnishings, only familiar with the layout due to his videos - you'd only step foot within the confines of his room twice, once being to return his laptop, and the other during the short tour he'd given you when moving in. 

His room was kept neat, bed made, dust free shelves above decorated in small plants, an arrangement of nick-nacks between, a desk on the opposite wall housing books and papers, a few camera lenses and his laptop. You exhaled a shaky laugh as your fingers traced over the closed computer, knowing that the very device had began whatever the fuck you'd call this. 

Walking toward the bed, you'd decided to start there, kneeling at the carpet to bend onto all fours, glancing over the boxes he'd shoved beneath, though upon inspection, they'd been filled only with university materials, thus unhelpful. 

Next had been his wardrobe, a slim black piece that held his daily essentials, the few jumpers he'd rotated through the week, pairs of trousers to accompany them, a shelf for toiletries and drawers beneath to accommodate his own underwear. A twang of hope sprung through you as you'd searched carefully through his boxers, wondering if he'd have thrown in yours too, but the storage device had been nothing more than a red-herring. You placed any disruptions to the garments back to how they'd been before, not wishing to leave evidence of your investigation. 

The desk was the same story, only filled with stationary used for his studies. Sighing, you'd felt defeated, turning on heel to leave, before your eyes set over the bedside table that had yet to be searched. This had been the most probable answer, as you'd kept anything relating to self indulgence within your own, a final piece to the puzzle you'd haphazardly thrown together. 

You sat on his mattress, nausea coating you as your hand reached to the knob of the top drawer, pulling it open. The familiar feeling of your arousal had pooled at your pussy, unable to breathe as your eyes ogled the contents. 

Crumpled within the front drawer, between tissues, condoms, and lube, had been the pink cotton you'd been searching so hard to find. Lacing your fingers around the garment, you picked it up eagerly. They'd still been stained in the dried residue of Giyu's climax, as you'd been hoping. 

Pressing the cotton flush to your cheek, you'd been unable to contain your excitement as you tumbled back to lay on his bed. Heat flushed through you as you felt yourself pining over the male you'd cohabited with, a deep inhale through your nose bringing you to realise that the duvet that had laid beneath you had smelled like him. He'd slept under these covers each night, crisp sheets now crumpled under your weight, his scent radiating from them to meet with your nose. You couldn't help yourself - laying on the covers that you'd watched him spill onto, cum soaked cloth clutched between your fingers, you'd have to relieve the tension building in your stomach, now. 

You grasped at your chest as he had his own in his videos, sliding your palm under the top you'd been wearing to feel skin. Shudders ran through your lungs to press out trembling whimpers, slipping down yourself and resting fingertips at the waistband of your pyjamas, slowly tracing down to soothe the ache between your legs. When your hand reached the desired place, you'd felt just how sodden you'd been. 

There was a chance this was the wettest you'd ever felt yourself, easily able to slip not two, but three fingers into your cunt with ease, rolling up against your own hand as you gripped the fabric in the other, pressing it deeper into your cheek. Your back arched, head tilting to fall onto it's side, the scent of the male you'd shared a space with lingering in your nose. Eyes closed, you pictured his cock in place of your squelching fingers, a cry of pleasure, his name under the breaths you haphazardly took.

Perhaps the fact you'd been a mess of moans had been the reason you hadn't heard the front door open. It was possible it had just been due to the quiet nature of Giyu, but you were completely unbeknownst to the sudden presence in your home - his figure nearing close to the edge of his bedroom door as you'd been knuckle deep inside yourself, writhing up on his bed.

Giyu noticed his bedroom door had been wide open, not how he'd left it before leaving, and he felt his eyes widen as he'd grown closer, remembering what he'd hidden within the drawer of his nightstand. His pace had slowed, creeping to lean into the doorway. His eyes scanned the room, and the fear he'd felt building in his chest quickly turned into shock, seeing his roommate a heap on his own bed, hands moving beneath the cotton of her trousers. 

Eyes squeezed shut as to compliment the screwed up face you'd been pulling at your pleasure, had gripped your underwear in hand, he fixated on you. Giyu's fear had been replaced with confusion: how had you managed to come across the cumrag he'd used last night, and how upon finding it, were you not completely mortified? Instead, pleasing yourself, so deep within your own mind you'd not even noticed the shift in the room, the fact you'd had company. 

Giyu felt the blood rush to his dick as he watched you squirm under your own touch, bringing a palm to clutch at the growing member in his trousers. He was adamant on remaining at the doorway, and simply watching you, until he'd heard his name tumble from your lips. 

He couldn't help it. 

"What're you doing?" Giyu's voice filled the air that had previously held the sounds omitting from your self pleasure - he'd meant to ask the question a little more seductively but it had ended up coming out as if he hadn't been completely amazed by the show you'd unknowingly put on for him. 

You opened your eyes, hurriedly removing your hand from yourself, gasping loudly. Your jaw moved as you racked your brain for an excuse, anything to help sell a story, but as seconds passed, you'd realised there was no way out of this. You'd allowed your arousal to get the better of you. 

If you'd have been thinking straight, you'd have felt less embarrassed - it was Giyu who'd not only taken your underwear, but came on them while filming himself doing so. But in the moment, you'd felt a twang of shame, unable to move as you fought your inner thoughts to give him some sort of response. 

During your battle within your mind, Giyu had walked closer to you, towering above your sweating body that had been almost rocking from anxiety - eyes sporadically searching around the room, parted lips allowing panicked breaths to escape. He reached out, placing his fingers under your chin to bring your gaze to his. 

All worry you'd had washed away when your eyes locked with his. His blue orbs radiated one thing - lust. 

"How'd you find them?" He asked, but as you fought against his grip to shamelessly look anywhere but his face, you watched realisation hit him. His eyes widened in horror, mouth agape, as you spoke one word: "GTom."

He let go, stepping back to think of how you'd possibly found his account. He'd posted the video in question less than 24 hours ago, which would have made it was likely you'd gone on to his account multiple times after finding out about the acts he'd posted online. His brows furrowed in thought as he searched for any explanation, finally remembering the fact you'd worked on his laptop around a month ago. 

How often had you checked his account? Maybe it had just been a coincidence, maybe you'd just searched his name and it'd happened to be shortly after he'd posted the video - one he'd been debating deleting for the past few hours, as it'd felt like he'd crossed a boundary. 

"How often?" That was all that he managed to choke out, still filled with surprise from the newfound revelation he'd uncovered.  "Do you really wanna know?" You'd asked, hoping that there was a possibility he'd just drop the question and move on. But, fate hadn't been on your side as he'd nodded, lips pressing into a line as he awaited your end of the conversation.  "Uh," You swallowed. "Every day." Bringing your hand to your neck, you let out a sigh, bowing your head and closing your eyes. Accepting that you'd probably be kicked out anyway, you decided to come clean.  "When I first saw it, I couldn't get it out of my brain - it was like an intrusive thought that I needed to act on. But, then I couldn't stop, and I had to watch them every evening, nothing else was even close to your videos." 

Hearing you admit to your self indulgences should've disturbed the male, but when he'd stroked himself, watching his movements in the phone screen as he'd recorded each session, he'd dreamed of women, like you, getting off to him. The thought of you unable to contain yourself over videos of him had him bricked up in seconds, almost salivating at the thought of you reaching orgasm over him each day for the past month. He was an exhibitionist, a shy one, but he was infatuated with the idea of being watched - the fact he had been within the safety of his own home had been intensely amorous. 

You were getting ready to stand, but hadn't managed to, instead finding yourself pushed back down to the mattress. Giyu had his hands interlaced with the hem of your trousers, pulling them down with ease due to the elasticated waistband. You were exposed within a millisecond, folds glistening with the slick arousal you'd been coated in, as you'd realised your panties had still been in a ball in your fist. You gripped onto them tighter as Giyu brought your hips to the edge of his bed, unleashing his erection and stepping out from the slacks he'd been wearing. He held onto your thigh with one hand, fingers reaching to run down your slit, pushing two into you quickly. 

The feeling of fullness caused you to squirm; his fingers were much thicker than your own. You fought the urge to fall limp, pressing yourself up to lay on your forearms, immediately setting your eyes on his hard dick. 

You'd never thought you'd be able to see it in person, learning the ins and outs of how he'd looked through videos, completely unprepared to have him between your legs. Air hit you as he removed his fingers, reaching over to grab something from the drawer you'd just retrieved your underwear from. He pulled out a gold packet, bringing it to his teeth to rip open.  "No," You whined, scrunching your face up. "Wan' feel your cum." You'd complained, causing a laugh to leave his mouth, your heart skipping a beat at the smirk you'd never seen before.  "Are you on birth control?" He questioned, eyebrow raising. You nodded, biting a lip and spreading a little wider, as if to entice him into you. 

It seemed to work as he tossed the packet, lining up his thick girth to your soaked hole, pushing in. 

You wailed, back hitting the padded cushioning beneath you once more and arms coming to your sides, gripping the blanket. He was big, but you'd known that already. You had faith you could accommodate his size, though the way you'd clenched around him had felt like you were being filled to the brim, the idea being enough to let a hum escape your lips. 

You managed to let go of the duvet, bringing a finger to rub circles over your clit as Giyu worked in and out of you. You watched as his stomach had sucked in just before he'd moaned, head tilting back, but eyes renaming on his cock disappearing into you. His movements were just like in his videos, only now you hadn't had to imagine yourself as his hand, instead able to accommodate him in real life. You were the reason he was hard, and edging closer to coming undone. 

You rubbed faster as he'd found his rhythm, mouth ajar while quiet groans graced your ears.  "You look so good-" Your words had been cut short by a squeal overcoming your ability to talk, a bout of pleasure coursing over you. Giyu moaned in response, a loud whine similar to that in his solo sessions, cock twitching in your walls, rolling into you once more. Your words of encouragement were far from lost on him, for Giyu had enjoyed appraisal more than most.  "M-more." He thrusted deeper, rougher with you as he felt himself spasm, barely able to focus on your body on his bed, only able to feel your tight cunt milk him. 

"I love your videos~" You hummed as he pummeled into you, slapping echoing from impact of his balls hitting against your ass. Squirming in his grip, you felt your own high coming closer, rubbing faster over your clit. "Your cock is so perfect - ah!" Your head rolled back, eyes closing as you'd began to talk through your teeth. He gripped your spread thighs harder, a clear indication of how close he'd been. "It fills me up so good, G'yu!" His name had been another moan for you, a scream pelting from your throat, your hips pushing upward to have the backside leaving the bed. 

For a second, your hearing went. There had no longer been the sound of his body on yours, his guttural moans as he chased his orgasm, only a ringing in your ears. Your body twitched, creaming over his cock while you'd screeched so loud the neighbors would most likely be putting in a noise complaint before the end of the day. It was only upon regaining your senses a few moments later that you'd felt a new sensation - that of liquid, coating your groin, and Giyu's stomach. 

"Fuck!" You'd stuttered, but the male pounding into your pussy couldn't have cared less about your shock, tipping over the edge and allowing his own orgasm to occur. He too had felt as if his body had ascended further than earth itself as he pummeled his seed deep into your walls. If not for his eyelids squeezed tightly shut, you'd have been able to watch as his eyes crossed through his peak. The man's sounds were that of music to you, and only when he'd let out the last few sloppy thrusts and pulled himself from the grip you'd had around him, did you take a moment to breathe again. 

"Did I squirt?" You panted, in shock at his sodden core, a clear liquid reflecting over the definition he'd had over his stomach. He nodded, taking a towel from his wardrobe to wipe over himself.  "Haven't you done that before?" Giyu asked as he handed the towel over to you, torso now dry. You shook your head in bewilderment, as he'd let another chuckle leave his mouth.  "I'll have to help you do that again, then." His promise wasn't lost on you, for you'd no doubt be coming back into his room the next night to chase your release once more. 

[lindszeppelin]

Omg Omg Omg. First off, loving all of the anons popping off today. I’ve been sleuthing for a few weeks (more on that below) and was already a fan but today feels like justice.

Second, I especially loved hearing about that tweet about an actress losing roles to Kaia Gerber. Not bc it’s a good thing bc it’s too real!! I’m also in the industry and am likely not up for her roles (slightly different demos but not by much) so I can’t commiserate too personally but I have tea anyway bc boy do I know people who have had the misfortune of dealing with her in one way or another.

-The reason not a ton of tweets like the one mentioned exist is because people who work in the industry have to unplug. Going on Reddit or something to read about show business gossip is not the relaxing time it is for those not in the industry, ya know? And the last thing you wanna see online is some untalented offspring eating at Nobu or shopping in Beverly Hills while having access to roles and directors and more while we go unnoticed in our acting classes and- if we’re lucky- bit parts on shows or landing that tampon commercial 😖. Social media users also cling to their favorites with rabid fever, so why risk getting our experiences gaslit bc some fan thinks we’re “haters” or strangers who lie on the internet. Also, some stuff is too specific to a project and it’s unsafe to spill tea ( either bc it’s too identifying and we can’t burn bridges or bc of contracts stipulations-sometimes you can’t say ANYTHING about a project until it comes out and even posting anonymously isn’t necessarily safe.) That said, with the strikes I think more of us are bored and online more and- speaking for myself- am looovvvving finding content like your blog and some other sources bc it’s validating to see not everyone thinks Kaia Gerber is a great actress all because her mom is famous or whatever. Like we in the industry have issues with her, but when she keeps getting cast in things it messes with our sense of reality ya know?

- I know writers who are FURIOUS at their words being spoken by these nepo “actors.” Writers rarely have power with castings (unless maybe they wrote a movie that they are directing or created the show and are the head writer. And even then there’s sometimes other political stuff at play…it sucks) so it’s heartbreaking to actors when parts go to people who can’t even act like humans. Look, I’m not saying American Horror Story is amazing and hasn’t gone downhill, but it started fine until they kept doing stunt casting and jumping ship! (Again, writers only have so much power. They take the jobs they land, but the show runner decides where the plots and themes of a season are coming from. Meaning many talented writers write for bad projects bc they a) have to take a job and b) can only do so much depending on what’s outlined for the season- if that makes sense.) Hollywood is brutal but seeing some famous spawn phone in the work and bastardize their words and plots is just the sour cherry on top. Every writer I know HATES, nay RESENTS Kaia Gerber the most out of alllllll the little nepo babies bc of how truly awful she is. If they ever get to rise up in the ranks and get more power (like becoming a show runner), they all hope to have enough power to blacklist that sorry excuse for an “actress” from their projects as revenge. And frankly, best of luck to them and I hope they succeed.

- Kaia is also not exactly as warm and friendly to everyone on sets unless you’re, you know, Laura Dern or of some importance to whatever the project is. She’s not a bitch throwing cell phones but she does not give a fuck about anyone not in power…and it shows. I sadly know a few people who had the misfortune of working with her and she was not interested in having real talks with anyone not important. Multiple sources from multiple projects have told me that. Only unkind people act that way bc they can’t keep up a facade when under the stress of filming. And I’m not talking one or day off days…consistently uninterested in anyone who does not have power. Many people more famous than her treat everyone the same on sets…just saying. People need to stop assuming she’s nice bc she what, doesn’t act like a total brat on red carpets? Everyone can act nice when there’s a camera around, c’mon people. What you see in interviews is not reality!

- Responding to another anon, sure Austin should join the strike pickets. He doesn’t have to post on social media but others would do it for him and it would show support, even if it’s a touch performative so many week in. (I know this is an Austin safe space so I’ll refrain on saying more.) That said, I’ve picketed a bunch and have yet to see a celebrity. Most days it’s the actors and writers who are not famous striking, but when famous ones show up it makes the news and genuinely helps with morale. Yes, of course sometimes they show up but not even close to as much as the little people do. I wish more famous people would, but when the nepos don’t…it’s even more insulting. They literally bought their way into much of their success (even if bribes don’t happen for roles c’mon, do you know how expensive a publicist is? We know all about the nepos before they hit the catwalk or land their first role bc they hire people to do PR, which gives them an even bigger leg up in addition to the connections they already have). These nepos do not care they are out of work bc they have other things they can do and still have financial security. It’s just insulting. And I think the original anon was speaking to Kaia mysteriously making news for walking her dog when she has a movie coming out she can’t promote. I’m not sure but I don’t think Austin has any movies for a moment so it’s not as egregious that he isn’t doing that this week ( unless I’m missing something, which I may be bc I don’t follow him much). The least these nepos could do is support the little people who are actually impacted by the strike. It’s proving how little they care about the industry and how unaware they are or how hard it is (we’re striking because we’re not being paid enough!) One social media post is a joke- especially since she was on one of the few projects that got an exemption!! She can’t act, she gets to act in the strike anyway (with exceptional people, btw), and then goes to Nobu instead of the picket lines? Please. That’s how I read the original anon at least (and loved their support so thanks if you see this!) and I don’t care for the second anon picking a weird fight about it. If Austin has struck work then fine, they’re right, but if not it’s not the same thing- at least not at this moment.

TL;DR- Thanks for all of the posts today. It was a good and validating read after a hard summer. Keep sharing why Kaia needs to be canceled! I don’t even believe in cancel culture and think it rarely sticks, but I’m willing to make an exception for Cindy’s entitled spawn who brings absolutely nothing but headaches all around. If nothing else, let’s encourage her to go back to school if she’s so “scholarly” with…is it romance reads in her book club? I genuinely don’t understand it and don’t want to but geez, that girl needs perspective outside of Hollywood for a few years and I hope she gets it somewhere (school or otherwise) bc that’s genuinely the best thing that can happen to her. I pray for the day she stops getting cast and my friends do instead.

omfg anon, whoever you are, i love you endlessly and i honestly don't have any words. this post should be sent around to the ENTIRE FANDOM because some people need to wake up.

am i shocked that people in the industry are fed up with kaia? absolutely not. i have read a couple of small blind items in the past that have mentioned her bitchy behavior. and while there weren't many of these accounts coming forward, it was those in the whole pile of good publicity surrounding her that always stood out to me more. it's so easy to fake being nice when you want to rub elbows with important people to get a foothold in the acting door.

im also so incredibly sorry that you and your fellow actor peers are even going through this strike right now. it's horrific and it should never have happened. it's the little people that already struggled to get jobs in the first place to get by that worry me more than some A list celeb that can't work on another movie but can chill in their nice house until the strike ends.

people that have creative type jobs and that work for their passions are always getting shafted by society. we shouldn't have to suffer because we don't want the typical corporate career. too many actors work their asses off to go to 100 auditions and are lucky to book maybe one thing in a blue moon while working day jobs at cafes or something. im sure it can feel depressing and degrading. you guys just want your big break, and to pay the bills while working your dream job. and im sorry that people like kaia gerber steals the work from right under your feet without a second thought. AND she butchers the roles she in, making the whole thing a farce.

im so glad you decided to come over here and talk about your experiences. honestly i hope more of your actor and writer friends speak out about the injustices. if you don't have a blog of your own i'd suggest making one now to document your feelings. who knows, it might get around and in the right hands of people to promote it ona grander scale. the regular media is barely covering the strike as it stands. we need to see that you guys are continually being shafted left and right.

and hey, i hope that more A List celebs picket with you guys on the front lines. it helps to make the headlines. thank you again for your commentary <3

[stay-frosty-royal-meme-tea]

Goncharov (1973) Sentence Starters

(Note:  Goncharov is a fake movie created on Tumblr and the joke went wild, as Tumblr jokes are apt to do.) Feel free to change pronouns and the like as needed! Quotes have been gathered from a few corners of the internet!  I’ve only been able to mark @/girlcaligula as the creator of many of these quotes, so if you’re the creator, just shoot me an ask and I’ll add you to these credits! If you want your quotes removed, also shoot me an ask and say which quotes are yours and i’ll remove them!

When I first married you, [name], I was nobody.

When I walked towards you at the altar, I felt that was the moment I would finally become someone real enough to have flesh and blood to call mine.

You needed for me to love you.

My inability to be loyal to you, [name], is what saved me.

I started being [name], at being myself, not upon falling in my role, but at the discovery of an unwillingness, of an inability.

And all I became was your wife.

Of course we’re in love.  That’s why I had to shoot you.

If we really were in love, you wouldn’t have missed.

You need the fear of God put back into you, [name].  I will come back when you find it.

You will have to tell them I am sorry, for I have no sorrow left.

People like us?  We don’t get happy endings.  We just get to keep going.

From now on I am already dead, my heart left there beside him.

Can you hear it?  Can you hear the ticking of the clocks, [name]?  I always thought... no, nevermind.

And so I come to the end of my life.

Make sure they don’t serve tortellini at my ceremony.

Oh, now that is a meatball that knows how to treat you right!

I would say it was time well spent if the last I ever saw was you.

There are many men and many guns in this world, but yours is the only one I care to be at the end of.

With you, things are warmer.  Stay by my side, [name].

Have you ever thought about all the blood?

This world is nothing.

We discover a cause, fight for a cause, we die for a cause and then? Then what? We rot for a cause? We are eaten by the worms for a cause? We are forgotten for a cause?

I have tried so hard to be the person I was supposed to be, just to discover I don't have in me to be anything at all.

The blood that we shed, the blood that is spilled from us, the blood we eat in public and the blood we throw up in the indecent privacy of our shame.

The party needed for me to believe in the cause, so I did.

[scary-senpai]

Saw this on reddit and sorta thought of you, I kinda want to hear your thoughts on this theory because I think it's pretty neat:

Ooh! Thank you so much for sharing this with me, Thoughtful & Cherished Internet Stranger! That’s an interesting theory, for sure, and I had some fun thinking about it... haha, I’ll be honest, you did inspire a headcanon where Saitama, Garou, and Genos are all kids on the playground acting out the most amazing fight they can come up with and Saitama tells Genos he has to play dead for the whole scene because “you already got to fight Garou, now it’s my turn, and you keep interrupting my imagination with your stupid facts!” Anyway, it was the bit of levity I needed before getting my heart ripped to bits again. So, thank you for that--you were an unexpected muse!

While I am holding out that we’ll get a cheeky, in-canon explanation for the re-draws (it’s on my bingo sheet!)--or maybe Murata/ONE will eventually spill the tea on what exactly happened with this panel--I’m hesitant to say that the past few chapters have taken place in Garou’s imagination. If Garou happens to be thinking aloud, he’s painting an awfully specific picture full of characters that definitely exist outside his imagination (like God and Blast) , even though Garou hasn’t met them yet. Garou would also be telling a story that relies on information he doesn’t have (the way God operations, and that Genos is Saitama’s disciple). It’s implied that in Garou’s heart of hearts, he understands that his quest for ultimate evil is destined to fail (and possibly a thinly-veiled suicide mission), but the last couple of chapters portray an exceedingly specific type of failure through a series of complicated & unfortunate events. I realize this ask came in before the latest chapter dropped, but if all this were happening in Garou’s imagination, then I’d also expect him to be less surprised to suddenly find himself in outer space.

...I could imagine Saitama telling this story to Garou, though. Like, perhaps he’s eaten the weird pickled egg things in the upper left and he’s just spent the last couple of chapters tripping balls as Garou morphs into his Final Form, which is Mom Friend :-/

In any case, Garou doesn’t look like he’s ready to talk in this panel. There’s no indication that you asked me this question because I majored in feelings Social Work/Psych, but I’m going to get up on my little mental health soapbox anyway, because if I’m out here voluntarily writing entire thesis statements for serotonin Fanciful Internet Points, I may as well slip in something that is actually true and helpful so I feel better when my predictions go horribly wrong.... anyway, what we’re learning now is that talk-therapy is actually counter-indicated for some folks, particularly people that have experienced trauma (like Garou has). This is because when you recall a painful / unpleasant memory, the same neurological channels activate as when you initially experienced that thing, meaning that you’re literally reliving that moment--in which case, you tend to trigger a fight-or-flight response, or shut down.

That’s what I see when I look at this panel--a person who is so overwhelmed their body has shut down to protect them from the pain that’s coming. I think Saitama might have had better luck just lying down beside Garou in the water as a silent-but-comforting presence rather than planting him on one side of a table and asking him to share. I understand the rationale (visually being equal, the metaphor of coming together and seeing each other face to face) but that setup of having someone staring at you while you try to bare your soul can actually be super uncomfortable/intimidating. There’s a reason “this character turned their face away” or “they turned aside” is such a powerful and significant action when you encounter this in a story/stage direction/shot. It’s a moment when a character hides/shields themselves or their companion from an unpleasant truth. For better or worse, there’s some agency in having the freedom to move your body that way. And if you notice Garou’s posture from the start of his interactions with Saitama, Garou almost never faces Saitama directly—Saitama stands wide open but Garou keeps his body angles to the side (like he’s halfway towards a fighting stance)—essentially making himself smaller, ostensibly so there’s less of him to hit, even early on in the scene when he dismisses Saitama as a non threatening, low ranking hero.

All that being said, I do understand the appeal of this theory. I want everybody to come home in one piece after having learned a valuable lesson about friendship/teamwork/etc. But that’s kind of the rub, and one of the reasons why these sort of plot twists are inadvisable: when something happens in a character’s imagination, there are no stakes and no risk. It’s hard for a general audience to get invested in the journey when a narrative is framed that way--and it’s also harder for a character to learn from scenarios they’ve independently fabricated… because if they had that kind of foresight, they generally have all the knowledge they need to be successful, and since plots usually hinge heavily on character growth, a character knowing all there is to know about their situation usually signals the end of the story.

Now don’t get me wrong, there are exceptions to everything—I, for one, would love to know how much forethought Garou put into this whole ultimate evil thing, but I’d be content to know what he daydreams about, and since you planted that idea in my brain I’ve had a little fun imagining how one might implement that. But while there are no hard-set rules to storytelling--only tools--this kind of plot twist feels like something that would get nixed by an editor/producer/other commercial stakeholders because it is generally regarded as heavy-handed, if not cliché.

BUT. I do think we’ll get some sort of battle that takes place in Garou’s mindscape--a bit like Mob Psycho (Mob vs. Minori)--confirming his demons and making better choices to come through to the end. I suspect that’s separate from the Saitama battle. While I’m sure Blast has a cure for Garou (assuming Saitama doesn’t punch the Devil out of him, first), it seems like part of Garou’s battle needs to come from harnessing his own willpower and fully committing to his “true self” (if there even is such a thing--as humans, we’re all just a mess of ever-changing electrified brain meat)... since temptation (to inflict pain on others, to obtain power) got him into this mess, it follows that resisting temptation would get him out of it.

So, thank you so much for the ask! I really enjoyed thinking about this, and I hope that doesn’t come across as disheartening or anything :-/ I have been very, very wrong about things before, especially the Magnus Archives! I am actually a fan of stories that frame low-stakes situations in high-stakes ways while still encouraging character growth! I’m thinking of Community, where the episodes lovingly and expertly spoof things Mad Max or Spaghetti Westerns through a campus-wide game of “The Floor is Lava” or “Paintball,” respectively. Even if the setup is clown-shoes, the character’s emotions are usually real and that’s what really carries the plot through. In “The Floor is Lava” episode, Abed tries to prolong the game forever because he knows that when it ends, his best friend Troy will be leaving community college to go on his next adventure. The ending is Abed and Troy coming to terms with that, and it does actually make me tear up when I watch it... or here’s another classic Troy and Abed moment where the writers mash up the traditional zombie movie (“Troy! Be the first Black man to make it to the end!”) and splice it with a heartfelt star wars moment (“Abed, I love you.” “I know”) and even though (in theory) it’s a moment of life-or-death self-sacrifice, we just know and trust that everything will turn out okay.

so yeah, if we did have this as a plot twist, then I think ONE/Murata are one of the few folks I’d trust to pull it off in a satisfying way. ONE, in particular, is a breaker of tropes and for sure, this arc has taken us to some wild and unexpected places, so, who knows?

[deiongill]

I couldn’t find the power to focus on the conversation in front of me. My thoughts kept moving from corner to corner of my mind, creating questions that all of a sudden I needed answers to. The what-am-I-doing-all-of-this-for style existentialism started to boil over and spill into wherever my moods are kept and arranged. I got caught in the loop again, and it was dragging me out of the moment. The loop is something that I’m assuming almost all of us have become familiar with in one way or another, especially if you’re a creative person looking to share your work and yourself with the internet. It’s the mental cycle of losing your sense of meaning, just to find it again, just to lose it again, and so on in a matter of minutes or hours. Your work or art goes from being a precious gift to mankind that you’re sure will solve all war and hunger in the world, to an absolute waste of time that no one will ever give a shit about ever. Funny enough, with a few turns around the bend of your own self-talk you manage to find a way to make it make sense again and instill a sense of confidence in what you do and who you are, just for it to spin right back around the block to absolute despair in an almost hilarious fashion. How does this even happen? For me it starts with two words: Vanity Metrics. I’ll spare you the cliches that I’m sure you’ve heard enough of before to know you don’t want to hear about it again, and just give you a raw account of what I experienced and felt today. It was hardly an enjoyable process, and I don’t think I necessarily solved the issue by the end of it either. But I think I spiraled far enough down that rabbit hole to notice some things that I think are out of place in my life. 

Like I said, it started with vanity metrics. The view counts, likes, streams, followers, the good stuff. I guess I should say lack thereof, because the feeling I felt and the thought that came to mind was a dissatisfaction that it seems I’m doing everything I’m doing in a bubble or echo chamber, and have felt that way for a while. Now I know damn well I have no one to blame for that but me, seeing that I’m absolutely terrible at sharing myself and my creations on social media and have only dropped two songs in my new chapter of total artistic freedom (that’s a story for another day in the near future), but I am a human being so I felt what I felt. The feeling was pointlessness. I’ll make my case by asking this question: If everything I’m making and sharing goes unnoticed other than by the people I already know personally, why not just keep it to myself and share it with those people when I see them? Not a very fun question to toy around with in your mind obviously, as that can lead to some pretty dark places when it comes to the idea of pursuing your artistic visions and dreams. But if I’m being completely honest my mind goes there a lot, and I have to do the work each time to crawl my way out.

What came next was the simplification process. I needed my mind to stop spinning out of control, so it was necessary that I simplified what I was feeling into the most straightforward explanation I could present to myself. 

“I feel like I’m not connecting with people.” 

“I feel like I don’t know if this is ever going to go anywhere.” 

“I feel like I’m letting myself down by not being where I want to be.”

There’s a part of me that creeps in around this point that starts to shift the perspective, because it’s almost funny to hear myself say these things when I look at it from a logical point of view. How many songs have you put out again? Only 2? Okay. When was the last time you really put yourself out there consistently? Right. How do you expect to be where you want to be at the beginning of your journey? You need to think clearly Deion. I understand the feelings, given your history and all the work you’ve put in behind the curtain, but showtime is a different type of time. It’s okay to be where you’re at. It’s also okay to feel so complicated about where you’re at. It’s all okay.

That was a beautiful thing that just happened there. I just parented myself. Even while typing that I felt a fatherly presence within my being, correcting my course and nudging me in the right direction. But I need to be honest; that doesn’t solve the problem. It’s just an anxiety reliever. So what’s next? Go deeper. What’s the core problem here? What’s at the center of it all? How do I find the solution in this? I’m going to break down those three feeling sentences from above and put together a puzzle to figure this out in one move. 

“I feel like I’m not connecting with people.” 

“I feel like I don’t know if this is ever going to go anywhere.” 

“I feel like I’m letting myself down by not being where I want to be.”

Connecting with people by going where I want to be.

I don’t know if that conclusion will make as much sense to you reading this as it does to me, but I also have an entire lifetime of experience as Deion to add everything up and know that this is what I’m missing out of life right now and understand how that’s connected to my internet woes.  This is what it boils down to: I’ve grown out of my environment. I don’t feel connected to it anymore. It’s a little abstract and hard to explain from my perspective because I don’t necessarily mean my friends or the people I work with creatively. I guess it’s more about the places I go, the people I come across in passing, the circles and environments I encounter through my creativity and passions… It’s the pockets and corners of the world I connect to. It all feels stale right now. It’s very much time for me to make a change in that, and place myself in a new space where things are fresh, inspiring, and feel like a fit for the person I’ve become. To bring it full circle, I think that’s where I’ll connect more with people, I think that’s where my creativity and career will start to find its way into the world how I’ve wanted it to, and that’s where I’ll find myself in a place I want to be. I think that’s how I’ll learn to solve my vanity metric problem. When my life and what it’s connected to feels far more valuable than social and monetary numbers, I’ll start to forget about them. I’ll find my way out of the loop.

[bluewinnerangel]

.

[salvatoreren]

so

i just finished the song of achilles today

i know

and let me just say it felt amazing

I mean i feel that a lot for most books, as soon as I close them and finish them I do a big breath of fresh air like wow i did it, i finished it, that ending was amazing,

I love that Patroclus had a moment in the battlefield, I was so happy with it and was blown away by this quote

"I am relentless, unerring, skirting buckles and bronze to tear flesh that spills red like the jagged puncture of a wineskin. From my days in the white tent I know every frailty they have. It is so easy." - Patroclus, page 330

Love that

And to be honest, I didn't cry all that much than I was expecting to, I mean I did cry when Achilles mourned for him but only a few, it was probably because it was 2am and I had hope to listen to its last few pages with Achilles Come Down but yk the internet was real fantastic that moment

I'm so glad Briseis told Achilles the shit he deserved to hear, because god the people back then were just so prideful ugh

Speaking of Briseis, I found her death to be surprising and unfair because she was just saying the truth then she was killed by Pyrrhus and her body was never found, and god I hated Pyrrhus in his short time appearance in the book he was such a stuck up

And finally regarding the ending, I absolutely loved it and I found myself surprised actually even though before i kept peeking at it, I was surprised to have a Thetis and Patroclus scene and I loved it, like Thetis found herself comfortable? With a mortal aside from Achilles, because even though I hated her for being so mean to Patroclus, I find it understandable because you know what Peleus did to her, like they should have let her be instead of forcibly making her a mother but ugh yk it's the old times, but yeah love that she was the one, who distrusted Patroclus, buried them together

While I didn't tear up the ending but I knew it was something I was meant to cry at because Patroclus remembering Achilles was so real? I felt so sad about it? My mind just conjured up those memories he was describing, which is one of the more reasons why i loved the ending because like i said the feels and if a book gets an intense feeling out of me then it works, it's great well at least to me

I'm so happy I got my sister to buy this book because ugh it was so beautiful, descriptive, romantic and educational actually, it gives me so much insight about the war and their relationship, I love Patroclus and Achilles so much,

Side Note: In my interpretation, what if Achilles Come Down isn't about telling Achilles to come down because he will kill himself but Patroclus telling him to come down from their tent which is up above because he has to fight and not remain prideful or sum, idk it's just something i thought about

[teddy06writes]

I feel there isnt enough sapnap x karl x quackity x reader, so can I request sap x karl x quackity x y/n where everone js tired at the end of the day, and despite having separate rooms, they all collapse together in one person’s bed

sapnap x karl x quackity x reader (HOLY SHIT THE POLY SHIP REQUESTSSSSSSS)

Trigger warnings: swearing

premise: vidcon pannels and meeting fans can be tiering, and maybe by the time the day is done you and all of your crushes collapse into bed together without realizing until the next morning  ¯\_ (ツ)_/¯

“Blep” talking

‘blep’ thinking

(y/n/n)- your nickname

(y/s/n)- your screen name

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ah vidcon, a content creators dream, or worse nightmare, or in your opinion, wild trip that lasted three days.

~~

It was your first time seeing anyone from the Dream SMP in a while, and your were practically buzzing with excitement by the time you were getting off the plane in California.

You fiddled with your carry on as you made your way towards baggage claim, grinning upon hearing a yell of “Oh my god is that (Y/n) from the internet!?”

You turned to see Alex standing just outside the gate he’d landed at, quickly you ran to hug him, stomach filling with butterflies at his touch. “Wait it’s Alex from the internet!”

You both laughed as you pulled away, starting back to baggage claim, “Are you excited for vidcon?” He asked.

“Yeah, what I’m not excited for is having to share a house with you idiot for a weekend.”

He scoffed, “What do you mean? It’s gonna be fun!”

“Oh yeah, the entire SMP together in one house, is such a good idea. It’s gonna be chaos!”

“That’s the fun part!”

“I like to sleep at night without being interrupted by random screaming and stuff.”  You argued.

“I’m sure there won’t be random screaming.”

“You seriously underestimate Tommy.” By now you had made it to baggage claim and began to look around for the right carousel.

You split up, planning on meeting back by the door to wait outside for Bad, who had arrived the day before and was picking people up, a few at a time.

After waiting at one carousel for a few minutes your suitcase came rolling out, but as you went to grab it someone else grabbed it from behind you, a familiar voice drawling, “Hey, hey.”

Grinning you turned to see Nick smiling back at you, “Hey yourself.”

He hugged you, and again your stomach filled with butterflies.

Pull away you smiled, “Come on, I think I left Alex just over there.”

Grabbing your suitcase in one hand, and his hand in the other you tugged him off toward where you’d left Alex, calling, “Alex look who I found!” as soon as he was in view.

Nick dropped your hand to grab Alex’s to pull him into a hug, and you found yourself fighting a grin at how red Alex's face turned.

“Bad texted me that he’s almost here!” You announced after checking your phone.

“Who else is he picking up?” Nick asked.

“Uhhh,” You pulled the messages back up, “Karl and Fundy, and then Wilbur is supposed to be getting another rental car and driving the rest of the Europeans when they get here, minus George cause apparently he also flew out early.”

You all headed out towards the pick up area, weaving through the crowds of people you felt Nick grab the back of your shirt, and when you looked back at him in question he muttered, “So I don’t lose you Idiot.”

All you could do was hope your face was clear of any blush as you smiled back.

You all ended up stood near the curb when a voice cut through the chatter, “Hey gu-uys!”

“Karl!” The three of you exclaimed as he ran through the crowd towards you.

Upon reaching you he some how managed to get his arms around all of you enough for a group hug, and you laughed, “Shouldn’t you be at the other gate?”

“Yeah, but I thought I saw you guys so I came over here, and I was right!”

Alex cocked an eyebrow, “What if it wasn’t us?”

“uhhh, I dunno, awkwardly ran at random people?”

You all laughed, and Nick scoffed, “You’re ridiculous.”

After a few more minutes of waiting, a car slowed near the curb, Fundy’s head practically falling from passenger window, “I’m looking for some youtubers, dumb American ones, you seen any?”

Bad smacked him, “they aren’t dumb, hey guys!”

You waved at them as the guys started loading their suitcases into the back of the car, and after Karl insisted he take yours as well, you slid into the back seat, “What’s the house situation like?”

“It looks like just about everyone will get there own room,” Bad reported, “But Tommy, Tubbo, Ranboo and Purpled are sharing the room with the bunk beds, because Clay designated it as the kids room.”

You snickered as Alex climbed into the back next to you, leaving Nick and Karl to take the spots in the middle row of the van.

“And obviously cause Kristen’s coming she and Phil are sharing, and then Eret said he, Puffy, and Niki would take the room with the double beds,” Fundy offered, “Which means the rest of us should get single rooms.”  

Alex elbowed you, “Told you wouldn’t get stuck with random screaming.” 

“Oh there's still time for that.”

~~

After getting to the airbnb and racing Fundy for one of the bigger rooms that was left (it was decided Phil and Kristen would get the master bedroom, and Clay had already claimed the biggest guest bedroom), you dropped your suitcase in one corner and brought your toiletries bag in the shared bathroom between your and Nick’s rooms, before flopping back onto your bed. 

No more than three minutes passed before Karl wandered into your room, flopping down next to you, “Ranboo and Sam are making nachos, and Dream and Nick found a foosball table in the garage, so a mini tournament is being organized if you want in.” 

“Foosball?” You questioned. 

“Yeah, it’s gonna be fun.” 

You allowed him to tug you up, and followed him down from the left hall of bedrooms, through the living room and to the connected garage where George was yelling over everyone to try and form teams. 

“Me and (Y/n) are a team!” Nick announced, grabbing your hand to pull you towards him. 

“Okay, that leaves Big Q and Karl as the last team for now! When other people show up they can join.” George announced. 

The rest of the day passed in a blur of foosball games, nacho’s nearly being spilled everywhere and the rest of the people arriving. 

~~

The next day was the first day of vidcon, and after getting dressed in some casual clothes you grabbed your laptop and headed out to the living room, mostly empty in the quiet house, with the exception of Tubbo, who was flipping through tv channels, and Phil, who was tinkering around in the kitchen. 

“So what’s your plan for the day?” Tubbo asked, finally having settled on a baking show. 

“Uhh, stress about the panel until it’s time for the panel, hang out, maybe find a pizza place, you?” 

“Me and Tommy are just gonna wander the convention center most of today cause I don’t have anything until the meet and greet tomorrow, then when he has to go I think me, Ranboo and Fundy might be going to mess with dream george and sapnap during the dream team panel. What’s you first panel about?” 

You glanced back down at your laptop, “It’s listed as ‘small creators with a big part’” 

From the kitchen you heard Phil chuckle.

“Oh cool.” Tubbo smiled, turning back to his show. 

You looked back down at your laptop, reading over the possible sample questions and discussion topics, you wanted to be mentally prepared for this.

At some point, as the rest of the house began to stir Alex shuffled out from the hallway and plopped down in between you and Tubbo on the couch, throwing his legs up in your lap.

“Good morning.”

He groaned, “Why is it so early?”

“It isn’t,” you laughed, flicking at his forehead, “Your just jet lagged.”

“Is there coffee here?”

As if on cue Nick, who had come over from the kitchen, offered him a mug, “Phil made a big ass pot of it.”

“Oh thank fuck!” He took the cup greatfully.

Nick smiled, handing you the other mug before going back for his own as Karl flounced into the room and plopped down on the other couch, “Good morning!” 

“Morning Karl!” You smiled. 

“oooo, are we watching cake wars?” He asked excitedly. 

Tubbo nodded and launched into an explanation of what had happened so far in the episode. 

Eventually everyone woke up and was gathered around in the living room and kitchen, drinking coffee and tea as they planned for the day. 

“Well if most of us have different things planned why don’t we just plan to meet back up here before dinner?” Niki suggested. 

A half asleep Wilbur nodded, “Sounds like a good idea.”

Techno snickered at his grogginess, elbowing him lightly, “I guess the first panel really will be sleepy boys inc.” 

If Wilbur had been fully awake he probably would’ve elbowed him back, but instead just muttered, “Shut up.” 

“Okay! So we meet back here for six yeah?” Bad asked. 

Everyone nodded, and disappeared back to their various places around the house to get ready. 

Back in your room you put your laptop away and got the last of your things ready for the panel, even though it wasn’t starting for a few hours.

“(Y/n)! Your panel’s at 12 right?” Nick half yelled through the open bathroom doors. 

“Yeah?”

“Okay cool, do you wanna come with me, Alex and Karl? Apparently Jimmy and all them just got in.” 

“Sure.”

You had talked to the famed, ‘Mr. Beast’, a few times, and had even been in one or two of his gaming videos, so before you knew it Alex was stealing the keys to one of the rental cars and you were off. 

“Yeah we just left the airbnb.” Karl, said into his phone. There was a pause before he said, “Oof, I’m glad I came out early then.” Another pause and then he laughed, “Nimrods. We can stop for food if you want?” 

A few minutes later he ended the call, leaning up between the front seats, “The gang requires food, we’re taking a pit stop to taco bell.” 

“Taco bell? At 9 in the morning?” Alex questioned. 

“Yeah apparently the nimrods forgot to get food before they left the airport, and now their stuck in traffic. We’re gonna meet them at the hotel.” 

You chuckled, “Sounds like a Jimmy move. Let me guess, they forgot because none of them slept and they took a red eye?” 

“What the fuck is a red eye?” 

You looked back at Nick, incredulous, “You don’t know what a red eye is? Oh my god you privileged fool!” 

Alex snorted, “It’s a really early flight Nick. Like, a you get to the airport for 11pm, and end up eating breakfast when you get to the other airport, flight.”

“Or, a get to the airport for anytime between 11pm and 4am and regret your life choices while waiting for your plane.” You offered. 

“In other words, hell.” Alex finished, pulling into a drive thru. 

“Yikes, why would anyone do that?” Nick asked. 

“It’s cheap.” Karl said. 

“Planes are less crowded, so are the airports.” Alex added. 

You smiled, “I do it for the feeling of a lineal space. There's no vibes like airports from 11pm to 4am.”

They all laughed, and Karl quickly unrolled his window to order an ungodly amount of food. 

~~

Unsurprisingly,  after that the day passed in a blur, the panel going pretty well, and then the impromptu meet and greet outside the meeting hall, trying to make it through the convention center with Clay and Nick without being mobbed, and then suddenly everyone was back at the airbnb getting ready for dinner. 

“(y/n) you bitch why are you taking so long in there!” Tommy yelled through the bathroom door. 

“I’m trying to fix my hair from when you threw water at me prick! There's five other bathrooms in this house go find another one!” You yelled back. 

Distantly you could hear Bad yell, “Language!” 

“Everyone is in the other bathrooms!” 

Giving up on your hair you set the brush back down and recapped the container of paste, turning and opening the door to your room, “Alright, fine.” 

“That wasn’t that hard was it?” Tommy asked, moving past you into the bathroom. 

“Don’t touch my stuff.” You instructed, striding out of the room and down the hall. 

Out in the living room Eret was humming as they cleaned up the last of the later Tommy had gotten everywhere as the rest of the group started to assemble. 

Once everyone was finally ready, and the final arguments of who would take which car, you were shoved into the back of one of the vans with Karl and Alex, making all of the anxiety that had dissipated after the panel came flooding back, especially when Nick, who was sitting on the bench seat in front of you, turned to join the conversation. 

The night was spent trying to keep blush off your face whenever Karl’s knuckles brushed yours, when Nick’s arm found it’s way around the back of your chair, or when your and Alex’s knees bumped. 

‘God’, you had thought, ‘this is like some romcom shit.’ 

After Tommy’s fail attempt to steal a set of car keys and try and drive home  -Phil smacked him upside the head, Niki snatched the keys from his hand, Kristen started to lecture him, all while the rest of you laughed your asses off- The bill was paid, and everyone piled back up into the cars, already starting to plan a movie night. 

Upon getting back to the airbnb, you headed back to your room to change back into the hoodie and comfortable pants you had been wearing earlier, heading back into the living room in time to steal Punz’s seat on the couch with Nick and Karl. 

When Alex squeezed into the spot between you and Nick, you could’ve sworn you saw Techno smirking and Puffy waggling her eyebrows toward you, how they found out about your stupid group crush you had no clue, but then Clay and Skeppy started to argue over what movie to put on. 

Tubbo ended up taking the remote from Clay, and from where he was sitting In front of one of the couches, tossed it over to Phil on the other side of the room, who said, “We’ll do a vote then!” 

A movie was selected democratically, some cheesy action movie began to play, and at some point you half turned, propping your legs up across the boys laps as Alex maintained a running commentary on the movie, just loud enough for you and Nick to hear, and Karl absently traced small shapes into your ankles. 

~~

The second day of vidcon was the most hectic, with you, Nick and Alex were going to watch the Mr. Beast panel Karl got to be a part of, plus both the dream smp panel and the meet and greet later in the day. 

You had woken up to Karl and Alex jumping on top of you, “Wake up! You’re gonna be late!” 

You groaned, struggling to shove them off, “What time is it?” 

“8:27.” Alex said, sliding off your bed. 

“Fuck,” You muttered, “Get off me, what the hell happened to my alarm?” 

“You left your phone in the other room, when it went off it woke us up.” Karl explained. 

“He means it woke him up and he felt the need to wake me up,” Alex complained as you sat up now free of the people laying on you, “Why the hell is your alarm set so early?” 

“It’s not early, I just wanted to be able to get ready without being in anyone’s way.” 

Karl nodded, “Makes sense.”

“C’mon, let’s give them time to get ready.” Alex grabbed Karl’s arm, half dragging him out of the room.

You quickly got ready, pulling on a nicer button down, plus a jacket that was one of the first from your new merch line.

You finished your hair, plugged in your phone and headed out to the kitchen where Fundy seemed to be attempting to make pancakes, dragging Karl into the process as well.

You sat down next to Alex and Ranboo, “How long do you think until they burn the house down?”

“I am not going to burn the house!” Fundy exclaimed.

You reached over and turned down the heat on the griddle, “Well you were gonna burn something.”

Ranboo snickered, “They aren’t wrong.”

“Shut up Ranboob!” Fundy retorted.

They continued to bicker as Tubbo emerged from up stairs, shoving Fundy out of the way to take over the griddle. “You’re all ridiculous.” He muttered.

“Yeah no shit.” You sighed.

“Language!” Bad yelled from the dining room.

“French!” Eret called back as she entered the kitchen, “Morning guys!”

“Morning!” Tuboo chirped, starting to flip some of the pancakes. 

“It’s panel day!” Tommy yelled, charging down the stairs, “Those best be chocolate chip Tubbo!” 

Karl held up the bag of chocolate chips he been scattering into some of the pancakes, and Tommy grinned, “Karl my man!” 

~~

Once breakfast was eaten and the dishes cleared everyone loaded back up into the cars to head to the convention center, everyone splitting up again, planning to meet back in the right area in time for the full panel. 

Karl headed off to meat with Jimmy and the guys as You Alex and Nick took spots in the audience. 

Once they took to the stage Nick leaned over and elbowed Alex, “Bet you 10 bucks when they open for questions you don’t go up just to flirt with Karl.” 

Alex glared at him, “10 bucks isn’t worth it.” 

You held back a laugh, “I’d throw in another 20.” 

Alex considered this with a sigh, “Deal, but only if we get milkshakes later.” 

You and Nick agreed, and soon enough when they opened up for audience questions Alex started to stand up, but immediately sat back down blushing slightly, “No.” 

“Damn.” Nick sighed. “We’re still getting milkshakes.” 

Once the Mr. Beast panel had ended you all went to meet up with Karl and head off to the dream smp panel. 

2 o'clock rolled around and the panel moderator began to announce everyone, one by one, and you managed to force down your anxiety, taking your place on the stage between Karl and Nick when the mod called, “(y/s/n), one of the first people to actually join the dream smp.” 

You sat down, smiling at the audience and quickly sneaking out your phone to take a quick video of your friends and then a pan of the crowd to put on twitter later.

Once everyone was on stage the moderator looked up and down the long table, “Wow, there are a lot of people on stage right now, is this everyone from the server?” 

Clay nodded, “Just about, we have a few others, Alyssa, Callahan, Ponk and Antfrost, who had other stuff going on, but for the most part, this is everyone from the server.” 

“This is honestly incredible, how, how are you guys all feeling about being here? I know this is the first Dream SMP panel, but you guys have been to vidcon before right?” 

“Most of us,” George laughed, “I think the only one who hasn’t is (y/s/n), there first ever panel was yesterday.” 

The mod looked over at you, “So, how does it feel to be at your first vidcon?” 

You laughed nervously, “Well, I mean, I’ve been to vid con before, but I was always out there in the audience, it’s- it’s pretty nerve wracking to be up here.” 

The topic shifted and after that things seemed to move more quickly. 

In the blink of an eye the first hour and a half was spent and people from the audience began to ask questions. 

“Wilbur, as the main writer for roleplaying on the server is it hard to keep track of character specifics and story arcs or is it all just written in with the scripts?”

Someone asked.Wilbur hummed, “Well I guess in part it’s written in the scripts, but I think I should turn this question over to (y/s/n), they’ll have a more interesting answer.”

Everyone turned to you. 

“Well, in my mind it isn’t all that hard, but I am literally the kid who memorized long monologues for fun.” You chuckled, “Once the first revolution arc started and the server really started to turn to roleplaying I started a google doc that now gets updated constantly. I have running tabs on current arcs, details on arcs that have ended and then there's detailed character descriptions. 

“I don’t necessarily write down bits to add while I’m streaming or anything, but most of the time it has to be the middle of the night or I won’t file anything correctly.”

Nick chuckled, “I have seen the document, it is terrifying.” 

“Didn’t someone open it to see you updating in the middle of the night once?” Ranboo asked. 

Alex nodded, “Yeah that was me, it was very traumatic, like, I blinked, and then there was another fifty words on the page.” 

You dropped your head in your hands, “It was the night after the whole election thing! Techno joined the server and then I had to add a whole ‘nother character profile, and he and his stupid English major were making things complicated!” 

“Listen man, I just wanted to make sure I had a backstory that fit into the story line, ‘s not my fault when Wilbur lets Dream have partial control of thing the storyline ends up non cohesive.” 

People laughed, and the topic was changed with the next question.

~~

Two and a half hours later, an extra hour after the panel was supposed to end, (there was just so many extra questions), you headed off stage, and were all rushed across the center for the meet and greet, which had been pushed back in time with the panel.

You felt bad for making the fans wait, but the organizers assured you that it was fine, most of the fans had been at the panel anyway.

In the big open hall the orginizors spilt everyone up into groups of threes and fours, the way fans could move down the line and see everyone.

Inevitably you ended up with Karl, Nick and Alex, at the end of the long sections of people.

“Holy shit man, how is it already 6?” Alex asked.

“Who knows.” Nick muttered glancing down at his phone.

“Dude this is supposed to go for like three hours too.” You complained, rocking up on your heals to look down the line, seeing the first groups of people starting to move past Tommy, Tubbo and Fundy.

“We’ll be fine! It’s always fun to meet fans!” Karl said, though he did look slightly wary.

After another three hours of talking to fans, signing things, and taking pictures the last group of people finally made it to your section.

“Hey! They saved the coolest for last!” The boy exclaimed.

“Hell yeah they did!” Alex half yelled back, some how still managing to keep up the enthusiasm.

“Here, let’s get you guys all in a picture together!” His mother said, motioning for you to all stand together. You slung an arm around the kids shoulder, smiling at the camera. “

“Okay serious question time, which one of us is the best?”

“Uhh,” the boy looked from person to person, “probably you (y/s/n), your contents really cool but your under rated.”

You grinned, offering him a fist bump, “ha! See that’s the third person in the last hour!”

Karl scoffed, “but I got like six people over all.”

“I only got five.” Alex pouted.

You rolled your eyes as the boy asked, “So if you guys are in a poly relationship on the server does it create problems with your friendship in real life?”

You all froze, except for Nick who somehow seemed to know this was coming, “Well, in game and out of game relationships are different, sure you can ship all you want, but that doesn’t mean stuff actually happens in real life.”

The kid nodded, “Cool, hey I saw your stream like, during quesrentine, just a question, how many people have tried to fight you today?”

You laughed, “at least 15 took pictures with him squared up.”

A few minutes more and the kid was gone, being ushered away by his mom, and you glanced at your phone, “holy shit it’s already 9:15.”

“Where did the time go?” Kale asked incredulous.

~~

After meeting back up with the rest of the group you all headed off to terrorize a McDonald’s, drawing a lot of attention from random fans as you all scarfed down food.

By the time you got back to the Airbnb it was nearly 11pm and everyone was exhausted.

After quickly getting ready for bed you a collapsed.

~~

The next morning you woke up, and for a moment worth your eyes still closed you were perfectly content with the warmth pressed agasint you.

Then you came fully too, realizing that, no, you weren’t fully swaddled in your comforter, you were laying in a bed with other people.

Opening your eyes you blinked away sleep, looking down, confused to see Alex asleep with his head on your chest.

Turning your head you saw that it was Nick on your other side an arm wrapped around you both.

Karl was half sprawled across all of you, similarly to the airport, as if he could hold all of you at once. You sat in shock for several moments before realizing you were in fact, trapped in bed.

Alex’s fingers were tangled with yours, Nicks nose was pressed into your neck, and you could have sworn Karl shifted in his sleep, as if to get closer to you.

‘Well,’ you thought, ‘might as well make the most of it.’ As settled back down to fall back asleep.

~~

Once you had all woke again, no one spoke as they headed back to there own rooms, and your crossed back through the bathroom form Nicks.

~~

The rest of the day past, still no one speaking about it, and that night you found yourself laying in your own bed, wondering why it felt so wrong.

There was muffled whispers from Nicks room, and you quietly got up, moving into the bathroom to hear better.

Unfortunately for you Nicks door to the bathroom was still open, so you couldn’t eavesdrop as planned.

Karl and Alex were both sat on the bed next to each other as Nick paced. “What’s going on?” You asked quietly

“Would- would it be weird if we cuddled again?” Alex asked hesitantly.

“We were debating asking you.” Karl admitted.

Nick nodded, “You don’t have to, it’s just- we-“

Quietly you crossed the room, climbing into the bed instead of answering the question outright.

~~

“Is- I- am I stupid, or is this something?” Alex whispered.

Vidcon had ended and even with the long weekend everyone was staying in California the time had gone all to fast.

You, Alex, Karl and Nick had continued to cuddle every night, still not talking about it during the day.

“Do you think it could be?” Was your only response, continuing to card your fingers through Karl’s hair.

“It seems like it already is.” Nick said.

Karl yawned, “I think I’d like it to be.You nodded,

“me too.”

“Me too.” Nick agreed.

Alex smiled, “I guess it’s decided then.”

The dark room was quiet another moment before you snickered, “It’s cannon irl now guys. What will the fans think?”

[hornime]

for your viewing pleasure | suna rintarou x gn!reader

camming was addicting in a way; he could be as lazy as he wanted with it and people would still lose their minds over the tiny crumbs he left them. it was suna’s sadistic little game, and he loved it.

warnings: 18+, college au, camboy!suna, male masturbation, mentions of drinking

w/c: 1k (this was not supposed to get this long oops)

a/n: no because suna is literally the perfect candidate for camming. he’s so fucking effortlessly sexy that it pisses me off but i KNOW i’d be pressing that follow button in half a heartbeat.

for your viewing pleasure: part one ↓ | part two

“fuck.” suna let out a guttural groan, his right hand moving rapidly along his shaft as he braced himself on his other forearm, naked body splayed out on his white bedsheets. “my hand feels good ‘round my cock but i’d rather it was you,” he grunted out to no one in particular. he took a shaky breath. “hngh, you know, if you were good, i’d cum inside. you’d like that, wouldn’t you? stupid whore, all desperate for some cum.” a few thrusts later, his stomach clenched and balls tightened, cum spilling heavily from his blushing tip. “oh god,” he moaned, “feels s’good.”

as he recollected his thoughts from his heart-pounding release, he reached forward and clicked the red button on his phone, stopping the recording. after playing the video through to ensure that nothing above his neck was in the frame, he posted it on twitter with a suggestive caption and headed to the shower. this was suna’s almost-nightly routine: film something filthy for his almost forty thousand followers and bask in the strange satisfaction of thirsty comments praising his cock and begging to get fucked. camming was addicting in a way; he could be as lazy as he wanted with it and people would still lose their minds over the tiny crumbs he left them. it was suna’s sadistic little game, and he loved it.

looking back, it’s almost inevitable that he started filming his solo sessions for attention, and eventually for some side cash. 

suna was always good with cameras—throughout high school, the miyas consistently kept him on his toes; he was constantly anticipating an opportunity for the perfect shot of osamu getting a set straight to the face or of atsumu getting tackled in retaliation for said set. just like on the court, he was observant: he always knew the best angles, the best lighting, and the best positioning, all coming together to form the perfect picture. 

and as for the porn part, well, he was a teenage boy once. he’d watched his fair share of erotic videos on all kinds of sites before stumbling upon the vast expanse of homemade clips on twitter, instantly understanding the appeal. a few months after he turned eighteen, he made his own account, figuring that he might as well use his cock for something other than his own pleasure. his peers always gave him hell for his apathy, especially in bed, but on the internet, strangers were in awe of just how little he cared—and how much hotter that made him.

by the time he reached ten thousand followers, he’d opened a venmo, making a few hundred dollars within a week. this isn’t too bad, he thought to himself. i could definitely get used to this. and he did, establishing a pretty solid side gig as a college student that could always use some extra cash.

speaking of college, suna wasn’t really one for parties. in fact, him attending the same party you were, being in the same room you were, and overhearing the only possible conversation that could possibly interest him, were all by complete coincidence. but damn, if he isn’t glad the fates aligned in his favor.

suna, in typical wallflower fashion, was standing against the wall, solo cup in hand, not doing much other than observing those around him and occasionally indulging in the flirtatious glances of a few other partygoers. thinking back, he wasn’t sure how he got so close to you and your friends, or why he was so keen on hearing what you had to say to them. all he knew then was that you were a familiar face from one of his classes, and you were irritatingly attractive. he could probably point to at least five different posts on his account in which he was thinking of specifically you, a person of definite sexual interest, while masturbating.

you’d been drinking, undoubtedly to the point of being tipsy, because there was no way you would’ve been talking about porn, especially at that loud of a volume in the middle of a party, sober. the few beers you’d downed had comfortably warmed your body, making your brain a little fuzzy and your actions a little more reckless. so when your friend had brought up the subject of pornography, you were quick to jump in.

“ya see,” you slurred, “for all the good stuff, ya needa be on twitter. your first mistake s’gunna be going on pornhub or xvideos or some dumb shit like that. you gotta be looking for the good kush on twitter. the homemade stuff. s’authentic and real.”

suna raised a brow at that, taking a short sip of his drink, curious as to what you were going to say next. 

“and once you’re on twitter, you gotta find some good,” you waved your hand vaguely, “content creators. ya know? some accounts you can rely on for all your needs.”

your friend asked you a question that suna couldn’t make out through the reverberating bass of the music.

“me personally? all right. this is my biggest secret, like, this guy is the holy grail of twitter porn. the user is...” 

suna nearly spit out the alcohol settling on his tongue as the username of his secret account escaped your lips. holy shit, he thought to himself, trying to control his quickening pulse. the idea of you using him to get off was way more arousing then he thought it could be. did you ever time your orgasm so that you both were cumming at the same time? did you stare with envy at his hand, wishing it was you? with nothing but your imagination and your fingers, did you pretend it was him looming over you, making you feel good?

his cock stirred impatiently in his pants. shit, i’ve got to chill the fuck out.

“i’m telling you, this man has the prettiest cock i’ve ever seen. like, you guys know, i hate sucking dick. ‘s the worse thing ever ‘cus their balls always smell like old cheese. but for this guy,” you rolled your eyes back dramatically, “i’d get on my hands and knees immediately. t‘so long and thick and curved and pink,” you gushed. “and his voice is so hot. i’d let him do anything to me.”

suna smirked from behind his cup. he likes you. maybe if you play your cards right, he’ll let you suck the pretty cock that you adore so much. and maybe if he plays his cards right, you’ll let him record it so he can watch it whenever he wants, and show off to his followers what a cockhungry slut you are.

making solo porn was getting boring, anyway.

>> part two 

© property of hornime 2021. do not plagiarize any of my writing and do not repost/copy my writing onto any other sites.

[ptergwen]

Could you write a fic where Tom is in an interview and talking about the reader as his current gf and also being his first love/childhood love?

woah i wrote kind of a lot like we got DETAILED here 😭 have fun

tom’s love life has been the topic of many conversations over the years. he’s gotten countless questions about who he’s dating and what he looks for in a partner. you’d think the hype would die down at some point, but no. even more rumors have begun to spiral as he promotes cherry.

thank the nosy interviewers for that. they’re taking all their chances to get up close and personal.

“so, let’s talk about love,” an interviewer prompts tom one afternoon. he sits up straighter in his chair, expression serious. “sure, let’s.” “what do you think about it?” she’s being vague so she’ll get the most clickable answers. “do you mean, like, in this film? or just in life?” tom wears a curious smirk now. he glances off to the side, where you’re sat watching.

you’ve been sitting in on his interviews as of late to keep him entertained. as much as the movie means to him, he gets bored of answering the same questions about it. having you there to snicker at his jokes or blow him kisses really livens things up. it’s been that way since you were little. you’re always cheering tom up even if he doesn’t realize he needs any.

“both,” the woman replies, mirroring his cheeky smile. “right, that’s what i thought.” tom clears his throat and raises an eyebrow. “so i’m not mistaken, love in my own life?” “anything you feel like sharing.” she beams into the camera while he nods to himself. you give tom a little smile of approval, which he catches from the corner of his eye. he chuckles at the gesture.

“easy enough. i’ll start with cherry, then,” he decides, getting back into the movie. the interviewer nods for him to go on. “you know, cherry’s always been kind of unlucky in the relationship department.” tom pauses for a moment to collect his thoughts. “until he meets emily, and things are still a bit complicated with her. i’d say it’s the same way for me.”

you jaw drops off camera, tom doing his best to stifle a laugh. he’s the biggest tease to walk this earth. “oh, that can’t be right,” tom’s interviewer insists with a mischievous grin. “you’re one of the most eligible bachelors out there.” “not exactly eligible, actually,” he mutters and twiddles his thumbs in his lap. a smile creeps onto his face.

she doesn’t miss that. “you do have a special someone after all?” tom squints at her through the screen. “after all? who’s been asking?” he jokes, the woman laughing like it’s the funniest thing she’s ever heard. “everyone has. the entire world.” you make wide eyes at tom. he’s never given many details about his dating life before, so this is a big step to take.

“well,” he starts, glancing over at you subtly. “yes, i’m a taken man.” “by who?” the interviewer blurts. she’s the first person to get anything out of him. “um,” tom breathes out an awkward laugh. you mouth it’s okay to him, ready to give the people what they’ve been craving.

you’ve had this conversation with tom a couple of times. he’s never wanted to put any pressure on you about going public, so it’s been your call if and when you do. now, you’ve made it.

“my, uh, my best friend. it’s not harrison, for those of you who know him.” tom bites back another smile. you sport one of your own, the tips of his ears turning red. “does this best friend have a name?” the woman questions. he looks to you again for your permission to say it. you think about it for a few seconds, then you give in.

“it’s y/n. you might recognize her,” tom explains, shifting in his chair. “she’s been on my instagram a few times, other stuff like that,” the interviewer makes a mental note to insert his posts of you in the video. “yes, yes. i think i do. you said she’s your best friend?” she clasps her hands. he’s fully blushing now, you giggling quietly at the sight.

“since secondary school, yeah. we met in one of our classes. english, i believe,” tom hums. “i was sitting alone, so she came and sat next to me.” he’s grinning at the fond memory. you feel your face starting to get hot. “how sweet. it seems like you became fast friends,” the woman suggests, throwing more questions out.

“what happened that turned your friendship to a relationship?”

it was when you were two wiser and more experienced adults that you and tom came to understand your connection. there was one moment specifically that turned you from friends to something more, though. tom will share that story with his interviewer, since it seems like she’s into the gossip.

“we didn’t seal the deal until a couple of years ago.” tom breathes out a laugh at what he’s about to say. you’re well aware of it, rolling your eyes playfully. “but, there was a moment when we were kids that i knew i really liked her.” “please, spill,” tom’s interviewer happily requests. he gladly obliges.

“y/n asked me to practice kissing with her because she liked some other bloke.” tom whispers to his camera, “which wasn’t true, by the way. we’ll get to that.” you silently groan and throw your head back on your chair. he shoots you a wink before continuing. “she wanted to go out with him, and said it was a best friend’s job to help her... prepare.”

you press a kiss to your middle finger and stick it up at tom. “precious,” he sarcastically mumbles in response. “what happened next?” the woman reels him back in. tom focuses on the screen again. “right. so, i did some research on how to kiss.” he shakes his head at his former self. “i really should’ve been studying for my A levels or something.”

“when i’m all ready, i invite y/n/n over so we can ‘practice’.” tom makes air quotes around the world, you murmuring, “i hate you,” only for him to hear. “i don’t know what website i used, but it was clearly awful.” he holds a hand up to pretend it’s your face. “i went in, and i just, like, stuck my tongue down her throat. like this.” he’s recreating the moment, you cringing at the vivid image you get.

“oh, no. what did she do?” the interviewer gives tom a pained look. “she nearly vomited, is what she did. ran home right after.” tom puffs air out of his cheeks. you press your lips together in satisfaction. “anyway, we’re reminiscing on it a few years later, and y/n/n tells me something very interesting.” leaning forward, the woman gestures for him to say it.

“i was the bloke she was gonna ask out, but my terrible kissing skills, or lack thereof, scared her off.” he exchanges a knowing look with you. his interviewer gasps. “i was like... are you fucking kidding me?” he only mouths the fucking part even though it’s getting bleeped. that makes you snort. “there’s a turning point, there’s a turning point,” tom reassures everyone.

“i told her i’ve gotten better since then, and we should try again if she wanted.” the interviewer puts a hand on her heart. “did you?” tom lets out a content sigh. “we did, and then we had a long talk about feelings and all that shit.” you make a heart with your fingers for him. he puckers his lips to mime kissing you, without tongue. “we’ve been together ever since.”

“what a lovely story. thank you for sharing that with me,” the woman butters him up more. she gets another idea. “now that you two are official, do we get to meet her?” “you kind of have,” tom retorts, but still checks with you. not expecting anything to come of this, you only shrug.

“i’ve noticed you looking off camera quite a lot. is y/n there?” his interviewer points out, much to both of your surprise. you’ve been at this for weeks, and she’s the only one to say something. “uh, she is,” tom finds himself admitting. he’s a terrible liar, so he almost had to. “tell her to come say hi!” the woman pushes. you look horrified when tom peeks over.

“no, no. i don’t wanna put her on the spot,” he brushes it off. “she’s a bit... camera shy.” “come on, just for a second!” she persists, waving you over like she can see you. this lady is starting to get on your nerves. “you just told me about that steamy kiss of yours. what’s the difference?” tom quirks an eyebrow. “i don’t know if-“

he stops mid sentence when you appear next to him. it’s to shut the interviewer up. although, you might as well reveal yourself before paparazzi do it.

“never mind,” tom grins a toothy grin up at you. “you wanna have a seat, darling?” “happy to,” you hum as he pats his knee. you take your spot on his thigh, an arm slinging around his neck. he wraps his around your middle. the interviewer is so stunned, she’s finally out of things to say. this could quite literally break the internet.

your voice a low whisper, you speak into his ear. “i can’t believe i’m doing this. you should’ve stopped me.” tom squeezes you closer and tilts his head to the side. “what if i didn’t want to?” “my god.” you plant a quick kiss on his cheek, leaving tom’s mouth hanging open.

“there’s your thumbnail.”

[parkers-gal]

breaking the internet... again T.H.

summary : baby holland breaks the internet (requested)

wc: 1100

part one

—

Twelve days ago, baby Scarlet Holland was born. The process left you both healthy, and you and Tom could not be happier, but people would start to notice you without your bump and instead with a baby attached to you.

"Tommy!" you called.

"Coming," He said, bringing in some hot chocolate to where you were seated on the bed. Scarlet had a crib set up next to your bed, despite having a nursery. She used it, of course, but during the day, you felt better when she was close.

"I was thinking," You said. "We should.. tell our fans about Scarlet."

Tom nearly spilled his drink when the words left your mouth. "Love..." he started. "You know what happened last time we announced something baby-related."

"Yeah, yeah!" You puffed, chuckling. "But I need to leave the house some time!"

"It's safer if you-"

"I can't even go on a walk?" You asked, pouting. "Tommy, I know with the covid and everything, it's safe for us at home, but there's nobody around when we take walks -- except for the paps!"

Tom laughed at you, running his fingers through his curls as he nodded along with you. "You're right," he concluded. "When should we?"

"Right now."

Tom rolled his eyes playfully before taking his phone out of his pocket. You had picked yours up off of the nightstand, before the both of you decided which pictures to post.

"I hope you know you're not gonna be able to use your phone for the next couple 'f hours," he said, breathing out a laugh.

"I doubt that's gonna happen again," you said. "Lemme see your phone."

And then you were prepping his post. You captioned it "Project completed✅🤍👼" before handing him his phone back. When you were certain both posts were ready, you were counting down again, just like you had months prior.

"Now!" You both said, giggling as you each hit the send button before tapping out of the apps and shutting off your phones.

"Now we wait," Tom smiled to you, grabbing your hand and kissing the top of it. The action made you blush, and you could only nod in agreement.

***

Only three hours had passed, but Harrison was knocking at your door.

"Thomas!" he said, coming in. You had come downstairs to see the boys in the kitchen, and you sat on the counter watching them. "You guys broke the fucking internet! Again!"

"Wha-" you started, but Haz kept going.

"A heads up would've been nice! Remember? My games!" He said, jokingly angry.

Tom's eyes were wide -- as were yours-- as the both of exchanged a glance before ultimately laughing at Harrison.

"I'm sure it's just Instagram, H," You said.

"Yeah," Tom agreed, leading him to the door. "Now, go exercise or something. Take a break from your phone," Tom said, shutting the door and turning around hug you.

You two were slightly swaying, your face in the crook of his neck as he held you close.

"I really love you."

"I really love you," you said back.

***

About an hour later, Sam had called Tom.

"'Ey, mate," he started. "Erm- I don't know if Harry told you, but the Brother's Trust website is down... again."

Tom sighed, "What? What happened this time?"

"It crashed.. again."

"I thought we reprogrammed it so that it wouldn't crash again."

"Well.. we did. But there's so many people on it, and so many people trying to get on it, that we can't actually fix it until the load lightens."

"So what, it's just gonna stay down?"

Sam forced out a laugh," Yeah, man. We can't do anything about it, right now."

"Alright," Tom said. "Thanks for letting me know."

And then, Tom was making his way back to you. You had a questioning look on your face, and Tom answered your silent question.

"Website's down again."

"Ohhh," you said, ruffling his hair as he laid on you, hiding his face in your neck. "My, uh, my merch site went down too, and my main streaming website."

Tom looked up at you, before returning to his position and laughing from your collarbone. You were laughing with him, too.

"My manager is freaking out," you went on. "She's hilarious when she's trying to do everything at once."

"Mhmm," Tom said, leaving messy kisses on your neck. "When do you wanna check the socials?"

"Right now?" You said.

Tom mumbled out an agreement, but made no move to get up. You only laughed at him, deciding to wait a little longer.

***

It was six o'clock by the time you two checked your phones.

"Holy shit, Tom. I've got 35 million likes," you laughed at the number.

"My followings went up by seven million," he replied, laughing along.

"Oh, lemme check-" but you cut yourself off, because the app had kicked you out. You glanced to Tom, to find the same confused expression that fitted your face. "Oh no."

"We couldn't- no, we don't have that much- it couldn't have happened again!" Tom finally finished, frustrated at his stumbles and stutters.

"Tom, I think we-"

"No! Nope!"

"But Tommy-"

"I said no!"

"But-"

"No!"

"I just-"

"Y/N stop it!" he whined, falling into your embrace and once again hiding his face in the crook of your neck. You laughed at him, despite Tom's whine about it.

"Such a big baby," you said, playing with the hairs on the nape of his neck.

"'M not," he grumbled.

"Are too."

"Am not," he said, nuzzling further into you.

You giggled again, rubbing his shoulders. "Tommy?"

"Mm?"

"We broke the internet again."

***

The next morning, the two of you had woken up in hopes that the apps and websites would be up and running again. Your new, limited-time-only merch that had just released was sold out and , unfortunately, backed up your website again.

Tom's Brother's Trust plan for a virtual interview had been postponed because the website just wasn't cooperating. Tom wasn't too bothered, but you supposed he'd never hear the end of it from his brother's. They were due round next week, so you'd find out.

Instagram was up and running, but quite slow. Your excitement blocked out any frustration from the app, and Tom was not different. The two of you were excited to see what the fan's had said.

A few read:

OH MY GOD BABY HOLLAND!!!!!💛

TOM IS A DADDY NOW??? MY HEARTAIHUFAGIU❤️❤️😩😩

Congratulations🥺🥺🥺

Y/N !! A MOM!! I CANNOT HANDLE THIS INFORMATION

lets discuss who the baby is gonna look like.. tommy or y/n???? xxx

You giggled at the responses, hearting and replying to the ones you wanted. Tom was doing the same, replying to his castmates and school friends. You had done the same, a few artists who had previously done collabs with you --or wrote and produced songs for you-- commenting and tweeting their replies.

"Love," Tom said. "They say she'll look more like me."

You gasped dramatically before clutching your chest like your heart was physically hurting. "Well," you breathed out. "They think she'll have my voice."  

Tom's jaw hit the floor at your response. "Y/N!"

[jamespotterthefirst]

Admission

Open Heart, Book 1, Chapter 13 Retold through social media posts and messages All posts here

Warning: Language and implications of adult activities

_____________________________________________________ Posted at 5:59 PM

_____________________________________________________

Sent at 6:35 PM Nurses’ group chat named “Tea Spill”

_____________________________________________________ Sent at 6:40 PM EMT group chat named “10-04”

_____________________________________________________

Received at 7:03 PM From: Rafael Aveiro To: Lilac Allende

_____________________________________________________ Received at 7:46 PM From: Ethan Ramsey To: Lilac Allende

_____________________________________________________

Received at 7:57 PM

_____________________________________________________

Voice call from Ethan Ramsey to Lilac Allende at 7:57 PM Duration: 8 minutes

Lilac: Hey. Ethan: Hey. [Long silence] Lilac:... Ethan? Is everything alright? Ethan: I wanted to apologize to you…. For slamming that door in your face. With the news about Naveen… [silence] Ethan: It wasn't my most gallant moment. After you left, I realized you had also received terrible news of your own. You needed me and I wasn't there for you. For that, I'm truly sorry, Lilac. Lilac: Ethan, I don't blame you for being in that state of mind, but thank you for the apology. [Distant chatting and laughing] Bryce: [in the background] The Haupia has arrived! Sienna: Yum! I've always wanted to try it! Jackie: That's store bought and you know it, scalpel jockey. Ethan: Busy? Lilac: No, just my roommates getting dinner ready. [Chatter grows distant. A door closes] Lilac: I'm all yours. [Long silence on Ethan's end] Lilac: Ethan? Ethan: I'm here. You should go be with your friends. Lilac: It's fine. They'll understand— Ethan: I insist, Lilac. I'll be fine. I promise. Lilac: Liar. Ethan: [chuckling] Fine. But I still insist you go and have a good time. Lilac: Can I check on you later? Ethan: You don't have to. Lilac: I want to. And I'll try my best to help you take your mind off everything. Ethan: That sounds… ominous. Lilac: [laughing] You'll have to find out. Ethan: I'm sure I will. Lilac: Bye, Ethan. Ethan: Bye, Rookie.

_____________________________________________________

Posted at 8:36 PM

_____________________________________________________

Received at 9:16 PM From: Naveen Banerji To: Ethan Ramsey

_____________________________________________________

Received at 9:32 PM From: Zaid Mirani To: Ines Delarosa

_____________________________________________________

Sent at 11:38 PM From: Lilac Allende To: Ethan Ramsey

_____________________________________________________

Sent at 12:22 AM From: Lilac Allende To: Ethan Ramsey

_____________________________________________________

Received at 1:31 AM From: Ethan Ramsey To: Lilac Allende

_____________________________________________________ Received at 1:49 AM From: Ethan Ramsey To: Lilac Allende

_____________________________________________________

Received at 1:58 AM From: Lilac Allende To: Ethan Ramsey Duration: 36 minutes

_____________________________________________________

Received at 2:34 AM From: Lilac Allende To:  Ethan Ramsey

_____________________________________________________

Received at 2:21 AM From: Ethan Ramsey To: Lilac Allende Duration: 1 hour, 23 minutes

_____________________________________________________

Received at 3:44 AM From: Lilac Allende To: Ethan Ramsey

_____________________________________________________ Posted at 5:45 AM

_____________________________________________________

Interview recorded for official purposes Present: Harper Emery, Elijah Green Time: 8:45 AM

H. Emery: Thank you for seeing me today Dr. Greene. Please come in. I trust you know why I called you into my office today?

E. Greene: If this is about the lunch thief that's been striking for the last few days, then I'm glad it's finally getting addressed.

H. Emery: Lunch...thief?

E. Greene: Someone's been stealing people's lunches from the lounge. It's getting ridiculous.

H. Emery: I… No, Dr. Greene, that particular incident is not why I called this meeting. Although, I will inform the Senior Resident about the issue. I called you today because I want more information on Dr. Lilac Allende.

E. Greene: What about Lilac?

H. Emery: I understand you two are friends?

E. Greene: Yeah, she's a good friend.

H. Emery: Dr. Greene, I'll get straight to the point. I am conducting an investigation to determine Dr. Allende's involvement in the death of Teresa Martinez. Do you know anything about that?

E. Greene: Sorry, Chief Emery. I'd say I know even less about what happened to Mrs. M than you do.

H. Emery: Hmmm. Do you recall the day Mr. Declan Nash visited Edenbrook for a meeting with me?

E. Greene: Yes, ma'am.

H. Emery: You came to me claiming that Dr. Mirani needed immediate help with a VIP patient. But when we got there, there was no Dr. Mirani and no problem. Why did Lilac Allende ask you to get me away from Declan Nash?

E. Greene: Lilac? She had nothing to do with it, I got the idea to rescue you all on my own!

H. Emery: Rescue me?

E. Greene: Dude seemed like a creep. I thought you could use a break.

H. Emery: (Stunned silence) Thank you, Dr. Greene. That was incredibly thoughtful if a bit unorthodox.

H. Emery: However, I ask you to refrain from intervening during any of my future meetings, no matter how distressed you believe me to be.

E. Greene: Loud and clear, Dr. Emery.

H. Emery: What else can you tell me about Dr. Allende?

E. Greene: Lilac's a cool roommate. Living with her is fun when she gets all my pop culture references. Even if she does believe Mean Girls was the best movie ever made and quotes it constantly. She used to live in LA and has all kinds of crazy stories. Do you want to hear about the time she met Samuel L. Jackson?

H. Emery: … No, thank you, Dr. Greene. I think I've heard enough. [End of recording] _____________________________________________________

Sent at 9:01 AM From: Eduardo Ortiz To: Veronica Ortiz

_____________________________________________________

Sent at 9:10 AM Residents’ group chat named “Boston Tea Party”

_____________________________________________________

Sent at 9:16 AM ICU Nurses’ group chat named “kiss our assessment”

_____________________________________________________

Sent at 9:17 AM Interns’ group chat named “Bop to the Top”

_____________________________________________________

Sent at 9:20 AM EMT group chat named “10-04”

_____________________________________________________

Sent at 9: 23 AM Surgeons’ group chat named “Cutting Edge”

_____________________________________________________

Sent at 9:25 AM From: Harper Emery To: Ethan Ramsey Status: Unread

_____________________________________________________

Sent at 9:25 AM From: Lilac Allende To: Ethan Ramsey Status: read, unanswered

  _____________________________________________________

Interview recorded for official purposes Present: Harper Emery, Jackie Varma Time: 10:05 AM

H. Emery: Dr. Varma, thank you for joining me. Do you know why I called you in today?

J. Varma: No idea.

H. Emery: I know you're busy with your caseload so I'll cut to the chase. What is your relationship with Dr. Allende?

J. Varma: We share a bathroom and an internet plan.

H. Emery: You're not friends?

J. Varma: Dr. Emery, I applied here to learn to be the best doctor, not to compete for Edenbrook's Friendship Awards.

H. Emery: I see. So there's nothing else you could tell me about Dr. Allende?

J. Varma: To be honest, she's indistinguishable from my other roommates. They're all distracting loud noise through the wall of my room as I'm trying to study up for my patients. The few times I saw her outside the apartment were a few rounds at Donahue's across the street, when we are all new and in that honeymoon phase. But unless you want to know her drink order, I have nothing.

H. Emery: That won't be necessary.

J. Varma: Is there anything else, Chief Emery?

H. Emery: I suppose not. You may return to your duties. _____________________________________________________

Interview recorded for official purposes Present: Harper Emery, Sienna Trinh Time: 10:25 AM

H. Emery: Good afternoon, Dr. Trinh. Thank you for meeting with me. Please have a seat.

S. Trinh: The pleasure is all mine, Dr. Emery. What can I do for you?

H. Emery: I'd like to talk to you about one of your fellow interns today. People tell me you are close to Lilac Allende.

S. Trinh: We're both dolphins not sharks, so we got along right away.

H. Emery: You're both… what?

S. Trinh: Neither of us are interested in screwing over other interns to get ahead. Lilac's a very moral person.

H. Emery: And how do those morals apply to Dr. Allende's patients?

S. Trinh: She definitely wouldn't screw over a patient either.

H. Emery: Can you say that with absolute certainty?

S. Trinh:  Cross my heart and hope to die. I've seen how kind Lilac is in all aspects of her life. But she is the most passionate when it comes to her family, friends, and patients. Lilac has a good heart.

H. Emery: Noted. Thank you, Dr. Trinh. Anything else you'd like to add?

S. Trinh: Yes. I hope you don't mind me asking but… where did you get those earrings? They're gorgeous!

H. Emery: Oh. They were a gift from my mother.

S. Trinh: They're stunning. You look great in them!

H. Emery: Thank you, Dr. Trinh, that's very sweet.

_____________________________________________________

Interview recorded for official purposes Present: Harper Emery, Landry Olsen Time: 10:50 AM

H. Emery: Please come in Dr. Olsen. Take a seat.

H. Emery: Before we begin, it is my duty to let you know our conversation is being recorded for HR and any other parties who might request it in the future.

L.Olsen: ... O-other parties? Like the authorities?

H. Emery: Possibly. Depending on the findings of the investigation. Are you alright, Dr. Olsen?

L.Olsen: I— Shouldn't I have an attorney present, then?

H. Emery: There's no need to lawyer up for this, Dr. Olsen. I only have a few questions about an intern you're in close contact with. Shall we get started?

L.Olsen: Sure.

H. Emery: Dr. Olsen, what is your relationship with Dr. Allende?

L.Olsen: We're roommates.

H. Emery: You're not friends?

L.Olsen: No.

H. Emery:  …

L.Olsen: I mean, y-yes. You could say that.

H. Emery: Can you tell me more about Dr. Allende?

L.Olsen: I've rarely seen her these past few weeks. Been studying up for our fellowship competition.

H. Emery: The one Dr. Ramsey used to be in charge of before he quit?

L.Olsen: (long, stunned silence) Dr. Ramsey quit?

H. Emery: That's right. Just a few hours ago.

L.Olsen: Does that mean the diagnostics team—

H. Emery:  —will probably be disbanded, yes. Unless Dr. Mirani or Dr. Hirata wish to continue the competition for two spots. Knowing one of them, she will refuse.

L.Olsen: (more silence)

H. Emery: Dr. Olsen, are you certain you're alright?

L.Olsen: Y-yeah.

H. Emery: Given that you live with her, do you know of any involvement she may have had with the death of Teresa Martinez?

L.Olsen: I've already given all the information I have, Dr. Emery.

H. Emery: Very well. Thank you for meeting with me today.

_____________________________________________________

Posted at 11:13 AM

_____________________________________________________

Sent at 3:23 PM Interns’ group chat named “Bop to the Top”

_____________________________________________________

Received at 6:16 PM From: Alan Ramsey To: Ethan Ramsey

_____________________________________________________ Received at 11:10 AM Group chat named “who tf is Martha” Members: Lilac Allende, Sienna Trinh, Elijah Greene, Jackie Varma, Landry Olsen

_____________________________________________________

Posted at 9:00 AM

_____________________________________________________

Posted at 11:58 AM

_____________________________________________________

Posted at 1:14 PM

_____________________________________________________

Posted at 1:39 PM

_____________________________________________________

Posted at 4:49 PM

_____________________________________________________

Sent at 4:55 PM

_____________________________________________________

Posted at 6:16 PM

_____________________________________________________

Posted at 6:30 PM

_____________________________________________________

Posted at the following day at 10:13 AM

_____________________________________________________

Sent at 10:39 AM From: Lilac Allende To: Bryce Lahela

_____________________________________________________

Posted at 12:03 PM

_____________________________________________________

Sent at 12:41 PM From: Bryce Lahela To: Lilac Allende

_____________________________________________________

Posted at 3:56 PM

_____________________________________________________

Published at 5:00 PM

_____________________________________________________

Received at 5:43 PM Nurses’ group chat named “tea spill”

_____________________________________________________

Author’s Note: Thank you if you read this monster.

A few notes:

A HUGE thank you to everyone who read, liked, and/or commented on the last chapter of this. I just realized I never replied. Forgive me. My brain is all over the place these days. I’m trying to be better. I am appreciative forever and ever for all the support you guys have shown me.

  The same goes for “Burgundy”. I will absolutely reply to everyone but I realize it’s been a while. I don’t want people to think I’m being rude and ignoring their lovely words of support. Anyway, I ramble.

 Regarding this chapter, I decided to add that Ethan x MC steamy texts scene because I was feeling self-indulgent lol. But also because I figured he knew he was leaving Edenbrook the next day after he told Naveen.

  MC didn’t sleep with Bryce in the on-call room (even though she does in the actual game for me lol. Couldn’t have her do it after that phone scene with Ethan)

Sorry for any mistakes or typos. Tumblr will not let me edit a massive post full of code like this. It will let me make all the changes and then not save them. Sigh. I expect nothing from this site and I am still let down.

Thank you so much, as always! Everyone has been so lovely to this series and it means the world!

Much love, Bree ____________________________________

*tagging separately because this post is ready to burst with code

[vannybarber]

Make Up Your Mind

Summary: You're ready, but Chris is making it seem like he isn't.

Words: 1.4k

Warnings: angst, SMUT, swearing, implied smut, insults.

Your body finally acknowledged the soreness between your legs when you get up to move to Chris' bathroom. You reach for a wash cloth on the rack and clean yourself up. Chris follows behind you with a shit eating grin on his face, clearly reminiscing the previous events.

Chris and you have been friends for about 2 years after working with him in Knives Out. You guys' childish personalities clicked right away and were literally each other's best friends. Only about 7 months back, you boldly told him that you wanted to fuck him. He was nothing less than down and you guys have been friends with benefits ever since.

Well up until recently. You both started acting like real couple. Going out to nice restaurants, touching in public, spending nights at each other houses and visiting each other's families. You both were enjoying the feeling of being together all the time, even without an official label.

Being around him so much grew out even more feelings. Not friendly feelings. But more intimate and longing feelings. To be with him. As his girl. More than just a friend to talk to. More than a nice body to play with.

There had been too many internet speculations asking why you guys don't just date already. Hell, you were asking the same damn question. But unfortunately, you know why. And you hate it.

"That little freaky number you did in there was something else, Y/N. 'Thou art truest freak' in the words of Shakespeare." He laughs, watching for your reaction. You just look at him smiling and shaking your head. The things that come out this man's mouth. You know damn well Shakespeare never said that shit.

"I told you from the start, boo. I know how to put it down." He eagerly agrees, hanging his wash cloth up and checking his fingers.

You observe him through the mirror. His bushy auburn eyebrows furrowed together while he picks at his nails. His sharp narrow nose that you feel against your right cheek everytime you guys make out. His beautiful red lips you've felt in many places on your body, preferably in places your eyes can't see. And his eyes. The ones that hold so much purity and happiness. Those perfect eyes.

This man is everything you want, but he just wasn't ready. That's the catch. That's the thing you absolutely hated. He had major commitment issues and people around you had more of a chance in anything than him ever settling down. It literally caused you physical pain. Because you couldn't change his feelings, no matter how many conversations you guys had or how good you fucked him.

Walking back into the room, you grab your bodycon dress you came over in and put it back on your body. You gather all your other articles of clothes throwing them into your handbag and take it out into his living room. He follows behind you in his grey sweatpants and dark green t-shirt. He always looks so perfect.

You flop on the couch and turn on the T.V.

"You wanna watch The Little Mermaid again, boo?" You turn around looking at him, seeing him raid the cabinets for snacks.

"Do you even have to ask me that?" He yells back when he finds his chips. You chuckle and start the movie.

"NO DON'T START IT YET I'M NOT READYYYY!"

"THEN GET YOUR SLOW ASS OVER HERE!" you yell back at him. His level of immaturity isn't even visible because of how high it is. It's unmatched.

After a few moments, he finds his way on the couch next to you with your double stuffed Oreos and apple juice, passing it to you. He had his veggie sticks cause he's so damn picky.

You both get comfortable and turn your attention to the movie.

After some time, it's the scene were Sebastian is encouraging Eric to kiss Ariel. You wish the real Sebastian would come over and convince Chris to be with you. Maybe he'd listen. Just the thought irritates you.

You huff lowly in annoyance. Chris notices but doesn't say anything. You always got frustrated at this part cause he took FOREVER to finally kiss her. So he brushes it off. Nothing he hadn't seen before.

While the movie was playing, you were getting even more frustrated in that moment. Chris had his arm behind your back and hand resting on your hip, laughing at Flounder. It was like he was playing a game with you that he didn't know he was even apart of. You shifted away from him a little. You hated feeling this way.

Little to your knowledge, Chris was watching you in the corner of his eye. He watched you as your mind raced and move constantly. Your eyes move around a lot when you think hard. He knew something was up.

"Jellybean, what's up?" You turn and look at him, pushing away the feeling the nickname presented you inside. He gave it to you after you bought him a Starburst jellybean gift basket to celebrate the end of you guys' filming.

"What do you mean? I'm fine" you lie right in his face. Like a complete idiot because he can see right through you. You turn back to watch the movie, but he grabs the remote and pauses it.

You roll your eyes, knowing very well he isn't letting this go. Why do you find yourself in these situations? You always end up fishing for trouble and you're not even using bait. It just comes to you. You scratch your head trying to come up with a way to dissolve the situation.

"When are you going to stop trying to lie to me, princess?" Another name he gave you. You prefer it over 'jellybean'. It made your body flutter even more. But at this point, you were tired of faking. Tired of covering up your feelings. Tired of being less than what you wanted to be to him.

Wasting no time, you take a deep breathe and spill.

"You know what Chris? I like you. There. I said it." You slap your hands down on your lap as you spoke.

"And I don't mean as a friend or as a fuck buddy. I've felt this way for a very long time. Even before we started having sex. I thought us doing this would make us closer, possibly forming a relationship."

You glance at him and continue when he doesn't say anything. He just looks at you.

"But it hasn't gone anywhere. I'm tired of faking my feelings towards you. I'm tired of coming over here acting like I just want sex when I want more. Way more."

By the time you finish, your head is down and your fingers are playing with the end of your dress. You cannot bring yourself to look up at him. You couldn't bear the rejection. All you hear are his quiet breaths. You fucked up.

Chris is a real talker. He could talk his ass off for hours into the next day. The fact that he isn't saying anything right now has you absolutely terrified, but ultimately embarrassed. You did this all for nothing.

"Y/N, I- I don't...uh" he stumbles over his words. That's all you needed to hear. You didn't need to bathe in it any longer.

You jump up off the couch, not forgetting to grab the cookies and juice, stick them in your bag and head over to your shoes. Chris is right on your tail calling you, trying to get you to stop.

"Hey princess wait" he calls behind you.

"Chris it's fine. I'm just gonna head home. I'm a little tired." Your soreness was the last of your worries, barely even feeling it anymore. You made an absolute fool of yourself and now you couldn't go back. It was a done deal.

"Come on, baby. I didn't mean to-"

"Chris!" You raise your voice at him. He shuts his mouth right away. Your shoes are on and keys in hand. "Its okay. I just don't feel good. I'll call you later. Tomorrow maybe."

You block out anything else he was saying and step out the door heading to your car. He didn't even try to stop you. He fucked up and it didn't need to get messier than it already was. He watched in guilt as you pull out his driveway and down the street.

You drive in complete silence. Normally, you'd be blasting Partition on the way after getting dicked down, but that was not the case. And it wouldn't be for a while.

Part 2 coming really soon 🤩!

[spiked-tea-writing]

and they were roommates?!

SapnapxFem!Reader

Summary: Imagine being in love with your roommate, couldn't be you.

Pronouns: She/her

Warning: Swearing

Word Count: 2.3k

A/n: I don’t watch or know anything, I just like these people and I had a concept. Also, he and Dream aren’t roommates in this for the sake of I can’t figure that out. Also also, my timeline is probably fucked but who cares

The dynamic in the apartment was...interesting to say the least

In the two years of living together, it had shifted a lot

In the beginning, you and Sapnap had been... less than cordial to each other

Both eighteen, fresh out of high school, off to college thinking that you knew everything.

There was lots of fighting, to say the least.

All of the “No it’s your turn to vacuum”, and “I swear to god Sapnap I will punt you halfway across the world if you eat my pineapple again”

The only reason you didn’t slit each other’s throats was that if the other person was dead, who would pay rent?

It was the summer before college started at the time, and you were working long hours minimum wage so coming]’/ home to an annoying prick caused a crap ton of conflict

After a few months of being little bitches to each other, y’all got piss drunk in the apartment and it all just sorta fell apart

Got that good drunk therapy, spilling your deepest secrets

(y’all were underage but shhh)

So by the time college started, the two of you had become actual friends and started enjoying each others company

A few months into the friendship, you encouraged him to post the video of “Minecraft, but it’s Raining Cats and Dogs” on a whim

Lmao little did you know what you had created (we’ll get to that later)

You mocked his train of thought constantly, laughing at the timing of it all.

“Ahhh yes, I am Sapnap, the genius who thought it’d be great to become a YouTuber while in my first year of college.”

He’d always just laugh and roll his eyes, playfully shoving you while stealing your chips.

The next few months were a haze of studying, work, and him.

It was truly a friendship of convenience since you guys were so busy, him starting his youtube career, and you working restaurants, then school on top of that, it was just easy to find friendship in your roommate.

Of course, he had his close friends which he spoke to over the internet, and you had your friends from back home, but as for college, it really was only him.

You guys had a fun time just hanging around the apartment, and it became so easy to be friends with him

And it WAS truly platonic (we’ll get back to that as well)

The best thing he brought to the friendship was his animals

You got on fabulously with Cash and the cats

They were all so cuddly and honestly loved you more than him lmao

You guys were just trying to get degrees and not be too stupid, was that too much to ask???

Well to a certain 2020, it was

The beginning of that year was great.

He was sorta realizing that he liked putting himself on social media, but on top of that, it seemed like a great start to a year.

February brought him to twitch, which you loved

You found it hilarious how he would just sorta play games and have people watch him live.

But you were incredibly supportive, as a friend, of course

He really liked it so, you tried to ignore the shouting at three am, and the loud anthems at night

Sure you’d give him hell in the morning, but why kill his fun?

March started great, as it was his birthday.

You got him a glittery lighter as a gag, but it was the perfect gift for a broke-ass college student

Then a certain pandemic came a-knockin’ on y’all’s door

It was a hard hit on both of you.

An executive decision was made that you two would stay put, but being away from your families was incredibly tough.

That spring was the birth of The SMP.

It brought him so much joy, which in turn made you happier.

The rest of the school year was a blur of zooms and test

Nick nearly killed you on multiple occasions when you made fun of the fact that he was learning computer science over the computer or made him help you figure out what the fuck zoom was since it was tangentially related to his major

“SAP HELP ME YOU SHOULD KNOW THIS ITS YOUR FUCKING MAJOR!!!”

“NO, IT’S- AHHHHHHHHH”

Yall got more than a handful of noise complaints shhhh

That summer was fill was spent trying to fill the time in weird ways

Note to self, he can’t cook (which you learned the hard way)

Yall spent so much time trying to cook and bake, then sweating off the calories working out with The Fitness Marshall lmao

As sucky as the situation was, that summer was so incredibly fun for the both of you, and truthfully the only arguments were about what music to blast

“Y/n I swear if I listen to Cosmicandy one more time I will drown you.”

“Well if I hear American Idiot one more time someone’s knee caps are getting harvested.”

(that argument was settled with Elton John.)

When school started up again that fall, something shifted

After a year of actual friendship, you guys were no longer just friends, and the tension was so thick it could be cut with a knife

You had watched every single one of his streams since day one, but within 2 seconds of his Love or Host, you felt the need to hurl for some peculiar reason

It was bizarre because there was no way you could ever like him, of course not.

Within the apartment, you guys suddenly got a lot more touchy, but only because it was getting cold with winter and all that jazz.

It wasn’t because yall were secretly in love, what is this, a romcom?

The number of times you guys woke up on the couch, definitely not cuddling was too many to count

You started sitting in his room while he streamed, definitely not watching him with heart eyes because of how excited he got

He always had a pot of coffee full and a 6-pack of monster in the fridge since he knew you ran on spite and caffeine, and definitely not so that he could spend more time with you in the early hours of the morning.

The laundry started getting all mixed around, resulting in just sharing any sweats, hoodies, or socks.

The same thing went for food.

No longer was anything labeled with a name, if it was in the fridge, it was fair game (unless there was a post-it because come on, yall weren’t monsters)

But no, y’all were just roommates, not dating, lets make that clear.

Feelings? We don’t know her.

This entire time, his friends have had to hear about you rip.

But they got front row seats to your relationship development

“OMG my roommate is the worst she ate all of the frozen strawberries”

“Y/n kidnapped Storm all day while she studied and I thought I lost the fucking cat asjvdk”

“I had to run down and talk to the landlord because we dropped a pot of pasta sauce all over the carpet and couldn’t get the damn stain out.”

“She is so nice in preparation for a family dinner zoom, she ran out to the local Filipino food place and pick stuff up.”

“Sorry I’m late I overslept and didn’t want to wake up Y/n.”

They weren’t stupid, and could clearly see how whipped he was.

Dream and Geroge teased him about it constantly.

“Woah, calm down Sap, you should probably tell her you love her before you propose.”

“Yeah Dream’s right, it’s kinda weird that you’re living together before ever dating.”

He always flushed and denied it with a shake of his head.

He wasn’t into you, are they crazy?

Quackity and Karl messed with him in more unorthodox ways

There are a solid number of clips where they are fake crying over how he’s cheating on them, and even more tweets to match

It only got worse when you met them accidentally.

He was chatting post-stream on a video channel with George, Dream, Karl, and Quackity, and just his luck, you came into his room.

Like of all the times you could walk in, it was the time he was with his five closest friends but I digress

“Yo I got some extra tips yesterday so I picked up some extra Red Bull if you want to do one of your weird all-nighter streams.”

“Y/n I’m on channel.”

“Oh shit sorry my b. Catch.”

All the guys heard was a thud and a groan from Sapnap as the six-pack hit him in the chest.

Dream was the one to recognize your name.

“WAIT IS THAT Y/N I WANT TO MEET THEM!”

You could hear Dream’s voice through his headphones

“Sap… who is that?”

“No one. I’ll be out in a sec to help with dinner.”

You could hear a British voice come through.

“Oh so we are no one now, huh.”

Another voice piped through.

“Common... ¿Qué intentas ocultar?”

You cut in.

“Your headset it shit my guy. I can hear everything. I’m down to talk to them.”

He let out a groan.

“Fine. But you’re gonna have to do the dishes tonight.”

“Deal. Now move.”

“What? No.”

“Fine bitch.”

You collapsed onto his lap, plucking the headphones off of him.

“Hello, Sapnap’s friends. I am Y/n. A pleasure to meet y’all. Can you hear me?”

You heard a series of laughs through the headset, and a voice came through.

“Yes, we can see you too. I’m Karl, it’s so nice to finally meet his girlfriend.”

A blush rose on both of your faces, and another voice came through.

“Yeah, we’ve heard lots about you. Plus we can’t see your face in that picture Sap sent us. I’m Quackity”

That remark stopped your embarrassment in its tracks.

“What the fuck? How do you guys know me? I’m not even his girlfriend? And what picture?”

Sapnap grabbed your arm to calm you down as another voice cut in, but his one you recognized as his friend Dream.

“Hey, it’s okay. He just talks about you a bit, and the picture I believe was of you holding like three cats with like a red bull can on your head.”

“Jesus fucking christ why do they have that photo??”

He looked guilty but chuckled.

“Because that photo is a damn masterpiece.”

Karl’s voice came back in with a giggled.

“Soooo, Y/n we’d love to hear about you. Specifically anything funny or embarrassing that you have learned by living with him.”

Sapnap let out a groan from behind you as you went off.

“WELL lemme tell y’all, he has no cooking knowledge, well I mean, now he does, but one time, about a year ago, I had I been keeping a pot of water boiling for about an hour, soft boiling eggs, cooing noodles, blanching bok choy, etc. but this fucking genius is like ‘oH tHe HaNdLe Is StIcKiNg OuT. LeMmE mOvE iT wItH mY bArE hAnD.’ Needless to say, he burnt the crap outta his hand and kept the bag of frozen blueberries on it for the entire night. It took me like a solid five seconds to actually help him because I was laughing.”

By the time you had finished that story, you had seen Nick roll his eyes like 5 five times while the rest of the guys were wheezing.

“Yeah, well remember the time you were trying to imitate Rapunzel after we had watched it over Zoom with my sister, and you swung the edge of the frying pan into our head and got a nasty bump on it? At least I moved quick enough to put some ice on it.”

“Ice? It was the damn leftover Slushy that I had been freezing.”

“True, but you got to drink it after, so it was a win-win situation.”

“Sap, I had a bump the size of a golfball coming off of my temple. There was no winning.”

“Fine, you’re just making me sound like such a shit roommate.”

“No that’s not true, you do all of the talking to the landlord, and you at least tried to muffle the noise when you stream.”

“I guess that’s true, but you do like 80% of the cleaning.”

“Yeah but only because you’re working. Plus in the past 6 months, you’ve made coffee every morning, AND made sure I was taking my meds.”

“Those things aren’t that hard and I do it to make sure you don’t die because I lo- care about you.”

“What?”

“What?”

You heard Dream’s wheeze laugh and remembered that you guys were still on call.

“Smooth.”

You both went red, and Sap moved his arm around you to leave the channel.

The next few moments were complete torture, the two of you just sitting in silence.

You were wondering if he meant what he was about to say and he was scared that you had heard it.

He was the one to break the silence. (mind you you’re still sitting on his lap lmao)

“I’m sorry about that.”

You weren’t sure how to respond. Should you ask him if he meant it? Because that wouldn’t be that bad. Or just pretend it never happened. Nah that’d be hella awkward. Or-

“I love you too.”

“You what?”

Wow, okay your brain is being a little bitch rn, but fuck it. Balls to the walls baby.

“I love you, and I have for a while now. I just want you to know.”

You finally looked him in the eye, and he was grinning like the Cheshire Cat.

“Thank god. I love you, and nearly fucking told you for the first time in front of my friends accidentally. Damn, I’m smooth.”

You laughed and he smiled wider.

“Can I kiss you?”

After a quick nod he swooped in and holy hell his lips felt great. His arm wound around your waist and your hands made their way to his jaw as he pulled you closer to him.

The only thing playing in your mind was “and they were roommates”