#wow every time i type this out it feels like im making no sense and this is no exception /lh

[mollyolikeme]

Thoughts as I read TSC: A Stream of Conciousness Part Two!

Filthy Spoils!

classic kevin.

LOL keep saying i see how much you bench as if thats an indicator of someones ability to kickass

HA! i always forget about the sixteen hour days shit, i cannot, i find it too fucking funny it's fucking impossible. mfs would be DECEASED. like DEAD.

they are so hardcore this fantastical has me CACKLING every time

like a ken doll!

BLONDE.

ill advised thoughts....

uh oh jean, your crazy is showing.

goddamn. to hate but need. complicated and absolutely screwed up relationship dynamics are fascinating.

okay, i like to rag on our beloved kevin (because its fun and easy) but like props where props are due. i know we didn't get to see his transition from raven to fox but i honestly think the boy would have handled it a lot better than jean jean morose over here. boy isssssss messed up.

foreshadowwwwww SWIM SHORTS!

dangerously low? dangerous for who jean?

do not be slut shaming, lucas. thats fucking gross of you and i'm not even gonna mention the nonconsensual factor...........

oh. my. word. its not funny but i feel the morbid sense to laugh at the ravens dropping like flies.

bad therapist. you cant force it. where is Dobson?

OMG LOL i summoned her!

dont you worry about kevin babe, the foxes got him

thats two hands on chin! thats two!

he's got a big dick! lololololololol boys not tryna be gayyyy

oh the heat! the HEAT! yes jeremyyyyyyyy

fear of water.

what happens when he losses his grip......i want to see you lose control......... hi familiar phrasing and trauma, i ADORE you.

in my head, jean has a very french tsk of his tongue reaction to almost everything people do around him.

yesssss the foxes ARE synchronized.

you tell him jeremy! none of his raven intentionally injuring people bullshit

omg were gonna get a little kevin trip to cali! reunion of the abused buds! (again gotta take the morbid hilarity into account for my health)

LOL wheel throwing! Patrick Swayze where are you?!

not the self flagellating notebooks he kept.....

oooooo intense. it all comes to the surface. the truth will always come out.

this is clever, gives just enough info about the ravens without explaining the crime side of things. go nora.

okay damn lucas.... issues buddy. dont be comin after jean jean. you'll regret it.

chin grab number 3! this time by jeremy 🤩

omg cuuuuuuuute little motorcycle ride and seashell gifty

again. uh oh jean. your crazy is showing to the coaches now. this truth is really spilling out the cracks

pause.......... guys my sanity........ my INsanity upon reading this........... im losin it! ......... okay resume.

morbid laughing morbid laughing morbid laughing fuck fuck fuck

yo. to somehow make me feel like neilio's story is a positive tale................

wow lucas. doubling down are we. his character does have a very difficult truth to come to terms with. its fuckin rough and a hella interesting arc.

you should call dobsonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

OH SHIT! neil's here! Thats not good news for you jean!

fy faen neil. you're kind of a gangster babe!

oh. dead sister. so sad. (typing it out like that looks sarcastic. It's not.)

yaaaaasssss thats the smart mouth we know and love! telling an agent he parked illegally!!! ahhhhh lolololololoolol

OMG Neil!!!! sweetheart! you care so much! awwwwwwwww wow nora seriously, what. a. treat! he cares about his buddy jean.

jeremy...... you got it so bad hun. always with the 'what do you need?' like just promise yourself to him forever and ever.

CHIN!!!!!!!!!! FOUR TIMES NOW.

woah Jer.

i like that jean actually doesn't like exy. such a good contrast to neils pov obsession.

im curious where this whole 'its not freedom its a pretty cage' thing is gonna go. like, yea i dont think you'll ever be 'free' free jean. but honestly this is pretty damn close. professional athletes lives are very straight forward. and if youre that good, fuckin easy.

[askwalmartniko]

"updated concept art" — ooc 3

i don't draw that much, but i was able to get some designs out. i can also talk about each of their personalities, and sure, you can ask niko's parents for something!

though i may not be able to promise like, drawings on everything.

walmart niko:

basically, i kinda wanted to self-project a bit more. walmart niko is a lot more mellowed out but still retains their moral compass, however they just act more lazily (like a cat).

they actually have their hair dyed, and their natural colour is this dark auburn, after their mom. they started dying their hair because they'd see their dad with it, and they wanted to act after him in a way.

they have glasses because they're sensitive to sight, and mainly they have problems with getting adjusted to colours. they get eye strained easily, and mainly because it's just hereditary and also. cat. i kinda wanted to also project how i'm sensitive to certain sensory stuff and wow, cats do have enhanced hearing and other senses!

anyways, they have glasses (also i kinda wanted walmart niko to be unique shhh). they are really crafty and take after both their mom and dad. dad introduced them to games and internet and stuff because he was super into it, and he knew that he couldn't spend time with niko that much, so he wanted to introduce them to something he always had a knack for.

they always hung out with their mom due to this, and they know how to do a bunch of things. how to sew a button on, how to tell if the bread has risen correctly (is that a thing idk i don't really make bread), etc. etc. plus is also great with children and stuff due to taking care of their neighbours.

niko's mom/hazel:

i'm still so indecisive on a name, but i can call her hazel as a placeholder for now.

okay, like i know some stuff with the technical canon nightmargin niko whatever lore but this is the WALMART AU.

tbh im making this up like fnaf lore. but basically like she met her husband because he was on a business trip to their village and all because he was doing something from another place and they got together (may explain why he has other connections outside of their village).

pretty big into agriculture but i feel like she may have wanted to be a rancher but she's like. southern mom. i'm kinda taking inspo off of caroline from sdv but anyways she just wants the best for her kid and all and shes a great mom i'd say. she supports her child's stuff and allows them to talk about it whenever and has drawings all up on their fridge. she's the type of mom to worry about picture day and spend a lot of money on those small photos and embarrass you about it whilst she gives one to every relative of yours

anyways now she works around and like does stuff like iron peoples' clothes, and also cleans and just does housework because of them moving. she preferred whenever she was able to work more with crops and also just in a community, but it's hard for her sometimes now to put emotion into her work.

she's the reason why niko knows a lot of well, basic stuff i guess but it's still very useful. also she's pretty crafty and intuitive! just like her kid. makes clothes and stuff.

niko's dad/ed??:

okay so like i was watching markiplier right (well, listening to his podcast or whatever) and that just happened i'm so sorry. he's like, really into technology and games and introduced niko to them, so they have a pretty good understanding of digital literacy even at a young age. he's a gaymer wow.

he does work a lot because he does care and hopes that, one day, he'll be able to not have to go away so far for conferences and meetings and will maybe be able to own a family-ran store that he'd see around their home village.

he's helped niko on really hard levels in the hit game super mayo bros and helped on difficult gyms in pokeymans. but has also helped with niko's problem-solving stuff due to this exposure to everything. also is somewhat the reason why they need glasses.

i will post cute art of niko's dad and mom together but yeah like they're still happy and all but it's just hard sometimes for 'em.

[bentosandbox]

I don’t know if anyone had asked this yet but I wanna know your opinions on vernal wind(after reading ur qiubai skin review) and what do you expect the story to go on after the event?

WOW sorry i took so long to reply this the next sui story already came out (although i haven't read it yet) but i did just finish reading silberneherze and it reminded me of vernal a lot so i finally managed to frame my thoughts(?) also did i review her skin i can't find the post so sorry if i repeat anything ive said before lol anyway

disclaimers: 1) didn't reread before typing this so i prob forgot a load of stuff 2) subjective as hell

Vernal was so aarhhhhgggg not bad but it was so... Traditional Wuxia which I thought I would be happy to read but bruh. they played every trope a bit too straight imo. i think the main thing that stuck with me was the crazy levels of filial piety which isn't a bad thing per se but come on. waaifu's dad. shakes my head i think ya01 should have destroyed him. i think wei should also have been bedridden bare minimum or something from the early encounter just from main story karma. only rat king gets to go scot free cause hes actually a nice dad to lin so i guess it makes sense she's like no no 'i'll continue the family business' i remember reading the story for the first time and being like (woozy emoji) over lin saying she'll take over because it was so.. girl youre probably not even 25 yet and you just put on some heavy af shackles which was so very 'the Right thing to do' great character flaw(?) for someone supposedly morally 'Not Good' i suppose

this avengers ahh looking CG... everytime i think about the context its just SIGH they really just girlies gang up!! and then Ya just 'aight cya' maybe im just salty du yaoye isn't in it and still isn't playable just undercooked as fuck banger image but weak setup and payoff there was no satisfaction to be gained other than 'nice art' (for me)

like... basically every girl in the picture's main motivation in the story is related to some guy which was so zzzzz to chew about when thinking about a bigger picture. actually maybe even every woman even jieyun's teacher i think only lin gets to go off the hook because of that lungwrath scene (probably my fave part of the event) so pathetic... so human... ok i know im bias

Chongyue: honestly i was kinda zzz-ing at the boss fight idk i guess there is a kind of 'damn even now when fighting he's alone lol' but other than that i was just like 'okaaaaay'

anyway silver lake spoilers below

leto's dad sucks but he's still at least 50 times better than waaifu's and i feel like degenbrecher is in a similar place where chongyue was except she basically goes idgaf and i enjoyed that very much

and just the littlest thoughts on Here A Peoples Sow (will they fix this title for global) because... funny i said how vernal was so 'traditional'. they literally flipped 男耕女织 (Men Till and Women Weave) basically feudal era? traditional division of labour with Shu and Jie lmaoooo

[tiredgoodomensfan]

GOS2 opening title analysis

spoilers ig?? idk

AAAAA S2 CONTENT YIPEEE

so, again, this is gonna be long, rambling, and will prolly make 0 sense so stick with me here I'm feeling a lot of feelings. im gonna go thru each thing in as much depth as possible so buckle up, this is gonna be like twice the size of my poster + hillywood dissection.

OK THE WAY CROWLEY LITERALLY CRAWLED UP FROM HELL TO MEET W AZ IS LIKE :((( and like on their way out from the tunnel thing I saw like a figure with wings?? I reckon it might be Micheal (the angel not the sheen) but I'm not 100% sure. whoever it is, they're holding a box or smth?? so do with that what you will idk

Im pretty convinced we might be getting Moses stuff, cuz the shining light at the top of the hill? seems like mt siani (sianai? idk) and the fact we haven't seen that type of light before and Moses is supposesdly the only person to have a direct face-to-face interaction with god makes me think we'll be getting stuff from that era (catholic upbringing coming in handy for knowing this stuff) ALTHOUGH, there are lots of animals, and they seem to be like in pairs as well?? so maybe more Noah and the arc? which like MAYBE ALL THE FANFICS ABT THEM COMFORATING EACH OTHER ON THE ARC WILL COME TRUE??? YIPEE!!

ok everything bursting into flames is a lil random but after a while of thinking, maybe sodom and gamora? (idk how to spell that either) which like, MORE SANDALPHON?? Don't get me wrong, hate the guy, he's awful and creepy, but he's SUCH a good villain. the actor doesn't get enough props online for how well he plays him. sandalphon had like 3, maybe 4 mins of screen time in s1? and from that, he's become one of the most HATED characters in the entire fandom. That is just like, wow, well done, I hate the character you play, but that's because your acting is amazing. ANYWAYS, sodom and gamora. aziraphales gonna be having some *feelings* about that, because why would heaven hurt all those people? even if they were sinners? similar to noahs arc situation with Crowley giving the most comfort this time <3

WOOOO GOTHIC SHIT!! the pickled herring cart makes a return and it is as confusing as ever. they're in a graveyard, so that's fun times. maybe more hell? cuz that's where they met up when the antichrist got delivered. anyways, does anyone know the period this is meant to be in? it's gone out of my head. anyways, I tried looking up pickled herring carts to see if they had any significance thru history but na. like they were there, and popular, but no, no huge significance. ALSO, in the graveyard, they go past a gravestone with 'every day' written on it??? girl wtf does that mean?? the running theories I have so far are that it's either like, the death of the everyday, meaning that what they used to do (hate each other??) isnt.. happening anymore?? idk?? or that it's just Neil being edgy and emo. my bets on the latter (love u mr. gaiman <3) ALSO ALSO OH MY FUCKING GOD?? Another one of the gravestones says JANE AUSTEN ON IT!! ARE WE GETTING JANE AUSTEN CONTENT??? OMFG??? YIPPEE!! maybe we'll get to see where az gets some of his first editions from :D aslo rq, religious imagery in the background, an angel carrying a cross, more heaven looming over Az?? ALSO HOLY SHIT?? I just accidentally paused it at onde of the graves and i swear it says 'here lies *insert another couple words here* BEELZEBUB?? HUHHH?? is that gonna be the explination for beelzebubs new corparation?? but that wouldnt make any sense?? idk atp but that gravestone DEFFIENTLY SAYS BEELZEBUB

(if you think this is long pls know we're 22 seconds into a 1:44 video, i want lying when I said this was gonna be BEEFY)

SO. HELL. WOOO!! more hell content which could go one of three ways. either we get more goofy Crowley giving more presentations, CAN I GET A WAHOO?? or we get him being given more assignments and we get more of an idea of the whole structure of hell, uncomfortableness but nothing horrendous. OR ALL THE ANGST FICS COME TRUE AND WE SEE CROLWEY GETTING BEAT INTO A PULP BY HIS SUPERIORS!!! maybe all three! can't wait to see :D but as much as my angst-craving self would love to see the last one, I think the reality is it's gonna be the first two. it looks like there's a desk and office chairs, so we'll probably be getting scenes that are like the equivalent to what we see of aziraphale and the archangels in s1

so we already knew we were getting more ww2 scenes but.. MORE WW2 SCENES WAHOO!! maybe we're getting post-church scenes? tender love confessions in the back of the Bentley? or maybe angst? maybe edosian orchids 901s (I LOVE THEM SM) fic about Crowley having a breakdown after being forced to report on the horrors of war will come true? or maybe one of them has to conscript cuz... idk dude just cuz. The bomber plane makes me think of the blitz so maybe Crowley is comforting Azi while they hide from the bombs in the shop? whatever happens, ill love it :D

a quick google told me fuck all about the ladies of camelot, just that theyre often overshadowed by the guys. WHICH LIKE WTF?? anyways, apparently its like king arthur times, so maybe we see the arrangement being born?? YIPEE. other then that, they seem to be like a dance group? so like, idk? could be suppourting acts maybe? could the merlin fandom help with this maybe? whats goin on with the ladies of Camelot my dudes.

MAGIC AZIRAPHLE MAGIC AZIRPAHLE MAIGIC AHVDSAKJ YAY!! I love the idea of aziraphale pulling a snake from his hat as part of the act and Crowley pretending to be pissed but internally freaking the fuck out because 'HOLY SHIT HES HOLDING ME HES HOLDING ME HES SO SOFT WHAT THE FUCK'

I HAVE. SO MANY. THOUGHTS. ON. SPACE. SO, SO HEAR ME OUT RIGHT, SO, the only time space has been mentioned really is when Crowley was talking abt how he made certain planets and the Alpha Centauri stuff. SO MAYBE WE'LL BE GETTING SOME PRE-FALL CROWLEY?? cuz like, the only thing close to space is heaven, but that's meant to be transcendent, and by definition exists outside of space and time. SO THEREFORE, PRE-FALL CROWLEY?? PLEASE?? NEIL IM BEGGING, IM ON MY KNEES, PLEASE!!

the... the hearts.. the love hearts.. the.. the hearts falling from the sky when they.. when the.. when... DNCBKHFVYEWIQUKLDWHJNX I'm feeling such normal feelings rn haha. anyways they're in love and :D the way they're sat on the roof together as well? like aw :( the jukebox and the vinyls (are those vinyls?) make me think more 60's content? and the Bentley as well? friendly reminder that Crowley goes too fast for him!! maybe we'll see him drinking himself into oblivion after he gets brutally rejected by Az :D oo or maybe him contemplating offing himself with the holy water! or maybe more lighthearted stuff, like the discovery of the queen curse :)

(also OO ninas shop!)

the lifts make me think more heaven content, which we knew was happening anyway but I'm thinking more Az giving reports and getting verbally abused and humiliated :D also, the steam makes me think industrial revolution for some reason? idk tho

THE ARRIVAL. is that the title for ep 1? Probably. but on the posters there's like a locked box? (getting fnaf 4 flashbacks) i've no clue what that means, like at all. but its prolly smth!

and thats it! this will probably be updated and edited, but these are all my thoughts as of the day it was released.

if you read this, there must be smth wrong with you mentally, but me too, me too. give me any thoughts you might have, ill be really interested to hear them! (these guys have consumed my brain)

friendly reminder that it'll be quiet, gentle, and romantic. and they like holding hands!

[piviani]

jungwon positive and negative traits

( disclaimer: please do remember to take my readings with a grain of salt. i am in no way a professional tarot reader and all of this are alleged and is for entertainment purposes only. )

positive traits

nine of pentacles - queen of cups - knight of wands - knight of pentacles in rv - queen of wands in rv

so lets start off with the nine of pentacles, according to it—jungwon is someone who is confident and independent in a good way. he is an hardworking person, might not back off easily even though everyone or everything is getting in his way. he believes he can make it. jungwon is someone who has a wide perspective, but not only that, he is also as well someone who understands the hard work of people— how people got to where they are now, knowing him himself also as well experienced it. one thing about jungwon is he always appreciates what he currently has, but that doesnt mean hes already content with it though.. however he is grateful and so, he continues to dream and strive for it. and that’s actually great. jungwon is also as well someone who comforts you. if we put it simply, hes sort of a .. soft person, and like friend who always comforts and supports you in every way. your healer and your armor. its like youre just.. simply sitting there and he immediately asks you what wrong. like he can sense it already just by the look of your face 😭 he is also as well calm—like the little waves of the sea and the wind of the sky. (wow yeah the contrast with the QoC and KoW lmfao..) ok lets move on! with the KoW.. yeah he is also energetic too.

jungwon is someone who knows how to sense the atmosphere. he can be calm at the right time, and he can also as well be energetic at the exact time. someone who probably says, “Lets do it!” with a thumbs up that immediately turns into a fist and just randomly takes your hand and run (with you) lol like . . just energetic. might be the joker in a class if he feels like it. hes such a positive person with others, always there to comfort everyone. (but yeah .. if alone :/ a type of to think negative to himself. thats the problem with him ig..) but yeah lets move on again! with the KoP in the otherhand, he is ambitious, protective and driven person. the type to take risks. (but he needs to tone down this a bit though because being too ambitious can fail you.) and ouu if we think it through he might be the type of person who believes with the word yolo too. and last, one of his traits that’s considered positive is, again, he knows himself. he knows what his wants and needs are. exactly thats right. he is aware. he is also not the type to be affected easily by the opinions of others. not to back off easily. though he might prefer to be in sidelines instead to taking the spotlight. a lowkey person.

note: um someone tell him to be cocky because ??? i would be cocky as hell if i were him im being honest /hj

negative traits

the star in rv - ten of cups i n rv - the tower - eight of cups - three of wands

his negative traits in the other hand is he thinks negatively. (this is not surprising anymore tbh) might suddenly leave you with so many unanswered questions. jungwon is someone who judges, or criticize his own self. a sort of a perfectionist. (this is probably due to his virgo🧍) he also as well someone who lack of confidence at times. self doubt is very prominent. kind of hypocrite too . . like your friend who gives you hopes and thinks positively for you, and is always there but erm with their own self.. which is confusing like what. but theres this saying, its easy to say but hard to do lol buuuttt moving on, he also as well constantly picks up even a little bit of his mistake. jungwon is the type of person who just suddenly disconnects with people out of nowhere, no matter whom.. may be his friends or family. he just disappears and abandons everyone. sudden mood changes always happens too. one time hes all smiley and giggly and the minute hes just sooo quiet and just stares at the wall. he isolates and might neglect his own needs even. always turns his back around and leave. he feels like something is still missing in his’, which he always seem to be in-search for. trying his best to not feel his own existence. avoiding the problems and all that shit instead of choosing it to solve . . jungwon always seems to feel empty to be honest.

[ reading was made in aug 7, 2022. ]

[almalvo]

STAR TREK: DISCOVERY | S1E10 "Despite Yourself"

[I will react to each episode individually and in full, raw reception and then post as is unrevised here onto my tumblr for the full span of every and all NuTrek episodes and series that have been and will be released. If this falls under your field of interest - I welcome your company in joining me. Enjoy the ride.] -------

wow first time the android dint have a bass sfx XD saru's tendrils - oml when he covers them is kinda cute i like owosekun's hairrr vulcans with weapons powered? bruh r we in mirrorverse we're in mirrorverse. 100%. yup. it was obvious from the end of last episode esp with 2 DISCOs showing mhmm. yeah these cuts need improvement still but alright bring it DISCOs turn for mirrorverse antics. lets go. haha this ep writen by someone named "sean cochran". zefram? jkjk tribble backk so cute give me one i wonder what its name is

ok this spinning scene of lorca and burnham and saru talking is spinning way to fast for too long how long are we going to keep spinning. its actually making me busy and hte cuts are not consistent in momentum so it didnt feel seamless it sholdve been takien in one shot and the camera needed to stop WAY sooner. thats how you wouldve actually shot a scene of that type. but "idk" ig, im just a mortal 😭 OK STAMETS. NOT ME SENDING PEOPLE 10 METRES AWAY FROM A TAP OF A FINGER sylvia saying "oh my god" then resuming like nothing happened was such a fast tone change i see those piercing marks on doc's ears. i always get this thoght of, whenever i see that on someone, im like BRUH PUT THEM BACK IN some of these camera ratios, rule of thirds, etc., are like. not done great? idk the eye is not reading the shot how it should a lot cuz the entity is not in an advantageous spot onscreen. tyler is going THROUGH it. damn. i think tyler's actor does well with representing traumatic fear oh interesting. i love these tactile sounds like the sound of the device tyler is wearing on his hand to control the ship's arm i like lorca's rbf XD

shit. poor tyler. thats never ok. her violating u like that. ugh. this makes me uncomfortable oh interesting. oo his klingon inflections are so good oh shit this is a weird scene its such a MIX of implications i like the acting i it actually it felt actually kind of complex, though the idea is simple nice this was actually decently shot. i like the way tyler's hair sits on his head haha looks nice nice swoops man these inconsistent camera transitions (one pose in the last cut, but a diff pose in the other) tylers acting doing p well actually his emotional expression is p decent yeah good ash x burnham is still an f no for me feels so empty it prob always will to me oo the gore effects of the cuts on hishand from the broken glass look relaly good faceless emperor. im so curious who.

"mirror disco". yess. ooo what do their mirrorverse selves look like SYLVIA. oml oh my god oml this is coo,ll oml SYLVIA LETS GO BEAT HER ASS. NOOOOO WHAT THE HECK HECK HELL HOLD YOUR HORSES?? WHAT THE CRINGEEEE oml please sylvia pull through lorca coaching her lmao WHAT THE FUCKGKKHKH O9H NMY GODDDDDD CHIEF ENGINNEERRRRR AND LORCA DOES A PASSASBLE SCOTTS ACCENRTTTTT????@?!??! YOURE FUKCING KIDDDIDNGGGG GET THE FUCK OUT OH MY GODDDDDDD/???? LORCA I MIGHT LIKE YOU MORE OML H GHGJAIHO THIS PREMONITION FUC KKKKKKKK lorca has a type of voice that sounds nicer when its quieter if that makes sense? it almost sounds strange when he yells? idk maybe its just me or maybe thats the way audio was edited oml the way saru was saying "well thats not very clever" was so emotive its beautiful oml their uniforms are oml so cool man the mirror badge man ill say not to be a shit but i love to always see this TOS/star trek root-type episodes where they reminisce on such a classic trope from og trek - but at the same time, i wihsh trek didn tdo it so much to just solely rely on TOS to make its relevance stronger, no matter how sensible that seems? while star wars feels preety big and expansive and busy with a lot of overlapping lore star trek is literally just "TOS, the expanded version" it feels so small. in that, nigh everyhing will forever and always just be/because of TOS. and i love tos. dont get me wrong, its my all time favourite forever. but trek i feel like never can develop significantly newer stuff? OH MY GOD USS DEFIANTTTT LOOK AT HERRR god i cant wait to see this ship design.. but yeah idk if people understand what i mean. that something so ideologically massive as trek is so small as a creative work in its "relevant lore". sure tng has its things, so does ds9, voy, ent - but it all comes back to tos. which is a double edge sword. a good thing. but also a bad thing. for if it were without tos, then much of trek doesnt really hit like that. yes be great hubby hugh love your mans ?? oh for a second i was like his eyes oh wow seeing sylvia with sstraight hair oh wow it compliments her head and face shape ngl she looks great in the armour. they all do ooh lorca in a leather jacket and black t shirt? okok works on him oooo sylvia lets GO GET IT YES KILL IT BRUH DO IT DO IT oo this dark lipstick works great on burnham oo i wonder when we will see sylvia really a captain

wtf. lorca for real? yo ujust did that to yourself? for blood? bruh we couldve done make up also yes of course, big runny red line down side of face. oooooooooooooooo MEAN BURNHAM lorca is an oddly good prisoner. hmMmmMM damn yall sass. ugh i really really really want more trek games. is he not human. is tyler not humnan. is tyler not originaly human. SO TYLERS A FUCKING KLINGON? i love his look of dejection hes relaly good at it. dude. hes a fucking klingon UH UHHHHH UHHHHHHHHHHHH??????????? DID YOU JUST FUCKING KILL HUGHHH??????? WHAT THE FUCK????? WAIT GAY COUPLE IS GONE DEAD NOW ITS OVER??/ WHAT I THOUGHT I THOUGHT STAMETS AND HUGH LAST LONGER? WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK? IM SO CONFUSED?? WHAT THE FUCK? WHY DID HUGH HAVE TO DIE ESP LIKE THAT? WHAT THE FUCK. what the actual fuck. its always the poc who dies. fuck you. idk. if he rly died or what. but fuck you. and trek still in the closet fuck this internalised homophobia. its been 6 FUCKING DECADES. GET OVER YOURSELF. KIRK AND SPOCK FUCKING EXIST. JUST COME OUTTA YOUR RAINBOW DOORS & BE DONE WITH IT. FUCK. (and no im not condoning invasion of privacy of one's sexual/gender orientation at all. i just mean if you said your gay. then own it. cuz trek has said it. its called seasons 1-3 of TOS, TAS, ST I-VI, AOS I-III. so own it. fuck.)

burnham does this role relaly well in a way she fits THIS mirror burnham more than her default. also damn lorca hahaha what i say, he gets kicked around a lot but its intersting that hes cap in this kind of role damn burnham you angery. i like this gold foil look on their armour. oo get him burnham get him get him decent choreo ooo ok ok yeah decent choreo oh yeah oooo nice i love this blade design oh shit burnham sonequa did well in her reaction to stabbing him. u can read the shock aand regret in her eyes forget klingons mirorverse starfleet is literally death. bat'leth? more like batshit. also this bridge oo whoa her bridge is on the bottom of her ship ooooo her warping oooo captain burnham but not how i thoughbt itd happen i feel like sonequa is better in this its crazy i feel like her as mirror self is better?

yes those HIGH boots sharp black and gold ugh. i love love LOVE the art department behind DISCO. hmm i feel like i see definite glimpses and glimmers of really quality stuff and quality delivery in this show but htey are very sporadic. spaced apart y inconsistencies and discrepancies. i think this sho wcouldve been much better ash and burnham - im sorry but who actaully, ACTUALY cares about them together. snoreeee s n o r e e e e e e um. lorca. is actually getting tortured. dude whta did i TELL yall. hes literally the one who gets pissed on fr fr 😭 damn. seeing lorca screaming. damn. id be surprised. but then again. he gets bashed all the time so. eh. ngl i feel like lorca gon die. but i wonder how.

damn.

[imlostinthedistance]

214 Times

I can talk about things for hours so I honestly hope you are ready for this.

There are many good things in life, and one of the good things in my life is music, all types of music (except EDM sorry lol). I would have to say my favorite artist is Mac Miller, but my favorite song is HONEST by Baby Keem.

Baby Keem also known has Hykeem Carter was born on Oct. 22 2000. He's a libra and I can tell cause he's always right. He gained recognition when ORANGE SODA first came out. I remember that song being a song of the summer.

Let us focus on the true subject though:

HONEST

HONEST appears on his second studio album "DIE FOR MY BITCH", its the second song.

The beginning beats feel like my heart pounding, it makes my entire body slow but also float to a different headspace. This song makes me feel comfort, sadness, happiness, and laughs.

Every single time I listen to the song it feels exactly like the first time I heard. I get those exact same feelings I got the first time, every time I hear it. I somehow know every single word.

There are so many lyrics that tug at me so much so I'd like to share them:

"half-past tweleve, I was all alone, I can't be compromised

fuckin' on my ex, we aint apologize"

This lyric wow. It is the truth. The whole truth, and nothing but the entire truth. That's all I gotta say.

"cause im way too young and you always right"

Again, wow. I have heard those gut wrenching words come from my mouth and the mouth of exes. It hit me somewhere I didn't know existed. I can just hear my ex saying that and its kind of funny because I am always right and we were just 19 year olds.

"the little arguments always start the fight"

I felt this, I felt it to the core of my entire existance. Arguing is exhausting but geez, having every little thing become an argument is draining. It hurts when a relationship goes through that, but both parties have to grow.

"be honest, honest cause im honest, honest"

That lyric is simply self explanatory. Baby Keem is so relatable what I would do to have a conversation with him.

"youre not who i love, huh i just need to pass the time, huh'

Saying those things to someone is one of the hardest truths I have ever had to say. I dont like lying and I dont like wrong impressions. In truth to not be a person who does this, heal.

"I treat my lil orange like a hellcat"

I LOVE THIS LYRIC. Cutest lyric in the whole song, it alludes to his song his song ORANGE SODA. An orange soda brand is... Crush. I want to be treated like a Hellcat.

Those are just some examples of why this song is so good. To me he is a relatable lyrical genius.

I have seen him perform this song 3 times live in less than 6 months. I traveled down to Miami to see him. Any chance I got I take, Baby Keem's words hit my soul like a truck full of fireworks.

I listened to this song:

122 times on Apple Music

and

92 times on Spotify

I listened to it 214 times. Basically listened to that song once a day for 7 months. 10 hours, 617 minutes.

Crazy, but the song is just that good.

Every single break up, this is the first song I listen to. It can speak to a lot of different circumstances. Its a song that not only is relatable but the beat and the bass and vocals.

His voice is so clear but you can hear how he feels. Hearing him perform it makes you feel warm, he makes the lights a beautiful sunset orange. He makes sure to let you sing it. He knows this song touches people.

The beat and the soothing ooohs, over it give me a feeling of swaying. Just way to the beat and let him talk to you about his shitty love life. It gives a sense of comfort that he has a shitty love life like I have a shitty love life so I am not completely alone in these feelings.

[saetoru]

stemming off that last ask/discussion, my unpopular opinion is that somehow authors are entitled to write what they want and have creative freedom for things like personality and backstory up until it gets to physical traits...and i feel it kind of seems hypocritical?

once again im adding a readmore bc i talk so much wow i need to actually stfu

ok i will preface this by saying everything i say is meant to be good natured !! and this is just all meant to be simply discussing stuff—im only saying this bc im gonna get into a race related convo briefly

but i think like i said in the last discussion—there is no inherent way to make personality a blank slate or completely neutral. every course of action / decision the reader makes in a fic will indicate something or another of their personality—and there will be loads of personalities it doesn't fit with it, so it is essentially impossible to write reader in a manner that applies to everyone. and since reader's actions and thoughts and dialogue are necessary to make a fic a fic, there is no avoiding having traits for them so it should be fair to let the reader have development in character / let the author explore giving reader complexities. but physical traits hold little to no importance to the plot / the development of the plot (at least most of the time) so it is unnecessary to include (again, most of the time). at the end of the day, there is no 100% way to make x reader content applicable to everyone in every way, but it is still self insert you should still try to make it inclusive where you can—which most of the time ends up being physical traits.

now that being said it's still true tho that u as a writer can write reader however you want—meaning you can cater to specific physical aspects such as a specific race, body type, gender, etc. BUT you should always tag that so ppl are aware from the get-go that they might not identify with the reader of this fic

but i do want to point out that there is also slightly a different conversation that needs to take place when the physical traits describe white / eurocentric features. again, you can honestly write reader to have blonde hair and blue eyes if u rly want—as long as you tag it properly, but writing a white coded reader is far different than writing a poc coded reader. whiteness is the default in a LOT of society and poc representation lacks incredibly so someone writing a poc coded reader for representation's sake is not necessarily the same as someone just casually writing reader to have pale skin and blushed cheeks bc one is trying to offer more representation and one feeds into a societal pattern of making white ppl the majority / default and forgetting poc exist in the process

ANYWAY THATS JUST MY TWO CENTS I TALK A LOT JASKDHS MY BAD IM HIGHLY OPINIONATED

i think the main thing is u are allowed to write reader how u want both personality wise and physical trait wise—but it is your responsibility to tag accordingly when necessary so it doesn't rope ppl into reading a fic and then feeling included halfway through if that makes sense

[sanchoyo]

arc v 31-40 thoughts. um. um well, yes………these kids need therapy, to preface this…holy shit ? wow. a lot happened in this stretch of episodes, answered some questions and raised 4000 more. anyway.

-SHINGO TRYING SOOOOO HARD TO BE COOL BUT BEING A MASSIVE DORK IS JUST ENDEARING ME TO HIM SO MUCH MORE. HES LIKE SHOOTING UP MY RANKING. which right as im typing this on 31, is yuzu, shingo, sora, masumi, reiji, and michio as my favs (probably in that order, too. im just as shocked sora got up so high, considering i was ANNOYED when he showed up first LMAO his friendship with yuzu is so endearing tho…)

-new opening! interesting imagery in it, but def liked OP 1 way more song-wise. -_-

-every word out of shingo's mouth im like . yeah ok im loving him hes SO funny JSDHFJK . his deck is furry samurai too, which is. well. its very good.

-reiji seems more concerned with his own goals to see yuya as a proper rival! I think he just sees him as the son of someone he admired, and someone of interest bc of pendulum! I dont think he thinks of this 14 yr old as a threat to his status or anything! which is the usual ygo rival MO…feels like shingo really is that rival character, which makes more sense to me given my expectations for a rival lol! 31-32 were the eps that made me start rly like yuya more (not that I disliked him before! just…he felt more like a protag when he started getting super into it!!! yes show some passion tomato boy!!!)

-wasnt too crazy about the new outro, either (the visuals were nice at least!)

-ok shingo is def the rival, right? right. a lil gay with it. theyre so CUTE firing each other up so much, its actually pretty fun and theyre both having a good time getting the crowd worked up together…wholesome! like, very very wholesome! 32 might be one of my fav eps, along with the yuzu/masumi 2nd duel…

-cannot fucking explain the drop in my stomach when getting to an episode just titled 'neo heartland city' and nothing else. NO NONOONO. NOT MY FUCKING CITY WITH MY FUCKING BLORBOS. EVEN IF ITS SOME KIND OF AU SITUATION IM SO SCARED.

-called it with the masumi being some kind of brainwashed to think shun was always lds! me and yuzu are on the same page

-ok seeing heartland city field spell was DISTURBING LIKE WATCHING A ZOMBIE OF A LOVED ONE BEING REANIMATED. all of the charas are calling it futuristic.. so is... is arc v chronologically in the PAST???? are all the dimensions also on different YEARS or??

-christ alive! reiji is doing the heartland city field spell on PURPOSE TO UPSET SHUN??? 'he should be happy' BITCH HE ISNT HAPPY. SHUN IS A HEARTLANDER. WHICH I ASSUMED BC XYZ, BUT YEAH. YEAH. WHAT HAPPENED BUDDY TELL ME!!!

-oh god

-oh god

-oh god. what the fuck, sora.

-ok. well. i knew this would happen. could not have predicted HOW or the fucking tone shift. I have whiplash. this was hard to watch, I literally had to keep pausing to get up, pace, breath, then come and sit again. several times. the actively being super fake from sora, trying to be cheerful and nonchalant and a bit bratty but still trying to hype the crowd, then the gradual, then frantic build up to someone clearly UnWell and Maniacal and SADISTIC and DESPERATE to Say the Least...insanely well done, hard to watch bc it HURTS. LIKE.

-what the hell, sora. -what the HELL. its not like I ever ENTIRELY trusted him, but my GOD. the execution was flawless

-'hunting you all is FUN and not hard at ALL and I LOVE IT' OK???? 13 YR OLD LOVES GENOCIDE. AND THE OTHER 14? 15? YEAR OLD CLEARLY TRAUMATIZED. BUT IN A RESISTANCE OF SOME KIND. COOL COOL COOL. ALL MY FAVS ARE PROB DEAD OR IN CARDS AUGH.

-both of them need therapy. this whole ordeal, soras scary creepy faces, making children cry, using the scariest creepycute monsters ive ever seen? endears him more to me somehow. hes a littol fucked up actually…more than expected…I can VIBE with that. I LIKE characters that are a Little Fucked and yugioh has NO shortage of them. might have to swap around that fav charas order list immediately.

-I felt bad for shun the entire duel, my god it was cruel of reiji to pull this field up! its! fucking heartland city! AAUGH IM SAD TOO, SHUN.

-fucking . horrifying how desperate sora is to win. shun is fighting for resistance and for survival, sora is trying to prove he can easily 'hunt' xyz users…which, he obv Cant Easily Do, he gets Squished, loses, passes out and has to go to the hospital. thru out this ordeal yuya and co are becoming progressively more horrified, but still care for their friend! awful awful painful to watch. but also, they might be the only ppl sora has in this dimension and I think. i think we can Fix Him. hes YOUNG we can FIX that mindset, right…or am I being too optimistic. idk the way it was framed and how much yuzu and yuya care abt him…I feel like he'll be helped (I hope??? child soldiers bad)

-the next ep opens with yuya, gongenzaka and yuzu actually TALKING ABOUT ALL THIS, swapping info, and thank GOD for that!!!! I felt like yuzu was the only one of them involved heavily in the main plot for a while there!!! yuya was actually pretty serious about it, which is Nice to see (again, hes starting to feel more like a 'protag' to me now…)

-sora and yuto confrontation leads to an escape from the hospital and a duel, of course…that shun doesnt WANT to continue bc sora is obviously! hurt! and yuto isnt HEARTLESS. sora is desperate to Prove Himself (making me wonder if academia punishes ppl who dont…do well or agree to help them…) and fucking yuya finally steps in to help. altho given the context clues. well buddy it doesnt sound like soras on the Correct Side! it sounds like! hes the bad guy here! (or, raised in that mindset at least, not the main bad guy but def needs to be treated carefully) n u shouldnt be dueling yuto at all bc u dont understand the situation!! AUGH. I GET it tho, the little blue freeloader has been eatin pancakes with u everyday for how long,, hes grown on ME TOO SO I CANT SAY ANYTHING. AUGH.

-sora got Sucked Back to fusion dimension bc his identity was compromised. THATS why he couldnt tell anyone! actually very understandable.

-yuto and yuya stopped their duel, realizing they have absolutely NO reason to fight, and yuto was very reasonable and explained everything! im shocked at the straightforward answers to a lot of my questions (I still have a lot more…interesting yuya's dimension is 'standard'…hm)

-they analyzed soras memories without consent while he was unconscious………………dude. dont DO THAT!!!

-banana hair is here! on a bike! I'm a lil confused at synchro's role in the war? they were recruited by fusion?? to help crush xyz?? or just yugo was?? or its a misunderstanding somehow bc they both seem to think the other stole something (someone, right?)... is my ASSUMPTION (at the start of 37 as I type this) which is…ok, reiji's dad is behind it for Some Reason. Why? why just target xyz?

-also where is dm in all of this? (…ok I have a THEORY with NO basis, that arc v/standard dimension is the direct branch of dm but years later. NO basis for this but it would explain where dm fits in, maybe? like arc v being an alternate branch instead of gx, and gx being the actual odd one out on the timeline?? I dont KNOW yet. I think zexal implied 5ds never happened at one point, right?? VERY confused LMAO)

-yugo? (sub says HYUGO which is very funny to me, I know theyre all yu-boys tho. cant fool me) is SILLY.

-ok, theres def four yuya-lookalikes (and yuzu, based on the ruri stuff). I've seen their designs before so I knew that obv, and one for every dimension. why…? whenever they summon their lil dragons and those start resonating they start to go. um. murder-y! yuya snapped yuto out of it, but STILL. I'm assuming this has something to do with…why theres four lookalikes, and yuzu and yuya's Magic Accessories. somehow. I assume maybe…not everyone has alternate dimension counterparts, maybe the accessories have a lot to do with it (~dimension magic~ ??) and them being too close starts to make them go a lil. crazy. (like. saying destroy everything jkdafjk) bc theyre all diff versions of the same person? like just born into diff dimensions. (insert trust no one not even urself memes here lol) and they have diff personalities based on their diff lives/families ofc…this is my theory For Now. lets see yuzu and ruri get close together to see if they also go crazy or What. I Am Waiting

-….yuto didnt DIE die just now right? he vanished. maybe he went back to his home dimension. it LOOKED like a death scene, but my god its ep 37! out of 150ish! he was set up as a main player right?? hes not DEAD dead??? yuya passed out for TWOOOO DAYS AFTER WITNESSING THIS???? he has the constitution of a sickly victorian maiden. (but also, is he just in his room and NOT A HOSPITAL??? HES IN A COMA!!! take him to the hospital tf!!! why are they entertaining meirus crystal spiritual healing!!! )

-oh my god YUZU is the one the bad guy wants? shes an important PIECE. NOT YUYA. AGAIN MAIN CHARACTER STATUSSSS I KEEP SAYING IT BUT. SHES SO IMPORTANT. (can I assume this shadowy bad guy figure is reijis dad? like thats gotta be, right)

-omg last yuya lookalike from fusion dimension is SQUIRRELY EVIL YUYA. I love this flavor of character I can tell just from his vibes hes fun. and hes pink and purbly. good! (LMAO at them translating his name as joeri. its yuri right? theyre all yu-names, furthering my idea theyre all the protags of their dimensions lol)

-…i forgot the maiami championship was even happening LMAO would yuya and yuzu just not have participated further if he stayed in a coma??

-….sora being like 'PLEASE PLEASE LET ME GO BACK TO STANDARD I WANT TO MURDER REFUGEES FROM XYZ SOOO BAD' while on some kind of medical table is. so. like do I laugh or cry about this KJHJSDJ

-SORRY BUT YAIBAS 4 SECOND LONG DUEL?? WAS SO FUNNY. GUY WHO JUST BEATS THE SHIT OUT OF YOU WHILE PLAYING A CARD GAME. SURE!!! OK. guess THATS not against the rules! THEY HAD TO CARRY HIM AWAY ON A STRETCHER. and yuya duels this dude next…I hope yuya returns that energy LMAO

-HEY what the HELL yuya is not responsible for your issues kachidoki LMAO how is it his fault he was having fun with his dad as a kid and you werent?? big jealousy match (also, what the hell @ his sensei telling him he wont have 'childish or fun' duels…when he looked like, 5? HES A BABY AND ITS A GAME SIR)

-'so far you've been walking a sunny path without a single shadow' my god dude, just bc yuya SEEMS happy doesnt mean he has no problems? he HELD A BOY WHO DIED(?) IN HIS ARMS 2 DAYS PRIOR TO THIS DUEL. HES GOT AN INTER-DIMENSIONAL MYSTERY ABOUT HIS LOOKALIKES. POTENTIAL DIMENSIONAL WAR TO DEAL WITH. HIS DAD WENT MISSING WHEN HE WAS A KID!! HES GOT!! PLENTY OF ISSUES!!!

-just as I type that. yuya is having a fucking TRIP about yuto and. looks fucking POSSESSED. RED EYES GLOWING HAIR UP. DID YUTO POSSESS HIM?? WHAT THE HELL. yugioh standard I Guess but is yuto for real just a spirit now?? LIKE, did he ACTUALLY KIND OF DIE DIE. UNSETTLED. (yaaaay xyz protag moment tho ^_^) I guess protags going dark/having a dark side IS ygo standard, theyve all been there! (I mean, ik about vrains, go rush or sevens yet…but up until arc v its been a consistent!) yuto was def not THAT level of scary tho (except when the dragons were resonating and he was all 'destroy everything . um.)

-lmaoooo kachidoki rly got what he asked for. he said ur gonna taste the darkness. and YUYA WENT FULL RUTHLESS SCARY MODE. GOT EM SO FAST. yes yuya everyone is scared of you a little bit HOWEVER consider that I LIKE scary characters who are a Bit Fucked up. keep it up bestie

-my god reiji is basically holding shun hostage, not letting him do anything, or not telling him abt yuto's duel disk being found….mean!

-we're 40 eps in and I still have SO many questions. however we must pause the plot for MAGICAL IDOL GIRL DUEL. SHES SO CUTE!!!!! girl duelists > everyone else. of course we dont get to see yuzus duel, we cut to reiji dueling some rando guard of not yuzu's while not yuzu stands to the side. very cool how they keep not letting the girls do Anything

-reiji is like 'yo why da hells there (2) of yuzu too' me too bud go solve mysteries for me scooby doo!

-very nice how reiji is like 'seal this area and dont let anyone enter until I say so' while theres danger, like, feels like he actually gives a shit despite his cool and levelheaded personality, which is nice. hes not gonna be my number one probably, but I do rly like him as a character so far… (except when he chose heartland field for shun, that was FUCKED up and I still cant tell if he was being sincere in thinking shun would like it or purposely being an asshole…)

-oh my god its not ruri this girl is named serena. JSDFKDJF WELL. IN MY DEFENSE. I MAY BE STUPID. I was prepared to type a full paragraph abt how its so scary academia seems to have taken ruri and brainwashed her so she'd think she was on their side,, and serena. is not ruri. theyre two diff characters. like I thought they were the same person. omg. I was just abt to type 'how does anyone genuinely mistake yuya for yuto theyre SO different looking' then I DO THIS. incredible! thats a great stopping place LMAO

[voidflower]

that one post got me thinking about pillow princess ed, a topic near and dear to my heart, and i typed the following directly into the chat box with my bestie. i now present it to you completely unedited becase i have to get ready for work but i need to share. SO. have a very scruffy fic idea.

im just thinkin. okay so blackbonnet havr been fuckin for a Bit but they still havent got all the kinks (heheh) worked out

and ed has settled ecstatically into fuckin with the first partner he's ever had who doesnt expect and demand him to do all the fuckin work and be scary about it while he's at it. he is Thriving. stede is insane and bossy and feral and ed sometimes thinks about it and only barely restrains himself from giggling in front of the crew.

wait. why is he holding back? can a man not giggle while thinking of his boyfriend railing him? he's fuckin blackbeard, fuck that! it's not like anyone on this crew would give him shit, anyway.

MEANWHILE. stede is Perishing. because he is convinced he is very very bad at sex because why else would ed be just... *laying* there!!

ed is clearly enjoying Just Laying There but stede cant see that cause he got Trauma

and all he can think of his mary at the conception of their children, tight lipped and absent in spirit if not body. it's not like stede had been really in the room either. and he'd tried to be gentle, to keep from hurting her, to not be... cruel about his husbandly obligations. and mary hadn't complained, just grimly acquiesced to the demand for bonnet heirs from their parents.

she'd just. lain there. every time she tried to participate (already not very often; he got the sense she had been rather ashamed of wanting to. er. participate at all) it had just made it exponentially harder for stede to. do his job, as it were. rather the opposite of harder, in fact.

so his traumabrain is Convinced (tm) that he's making no better of a showing at sodomy than he had at husbandry and ed is just being kind about his utter inadequacy in every regard and--

being stede, he is not one to let crippling self-doubt stop him from charging full-bore into the damn thing. no, he's one to let crippling self-doubt sabotage things he's already started in a fit of divine audacity.

he is NOT going to do that this time! he is learning! he is adapting! he actually verbally expresses his feelings on occasion! olu had asked if he was doing alright the other day while glancing at ed and stede hadn't even said no! he had, in fact, said, "oh, you know. the usual stressors in a new relationship. nothing that can't be mended!"

and olu had looked dubious but had said, "well. alright, then. if you've got it handled." and was that... respect? something close, at least? wow!

and then olu had hesitated and added, "i wouldn't pry, you know, but your relationship with the captain is kind of a security risk factor around here, so. we thought maybe we should check up on things."

that had prickled at stede a little. "edward and i just fine, thank you! a little trust would be appreciated, you know." ed wasn't some kind of steel trap ready to spring closed at the slightest wrong touch. he was a kind, lovely, understanding man who layed there all limp like a doll while stede buggered him and it was still the best sex stede had had by orders of magnitude.

"...sure, captain, but.... you get marooned once, yanno. it can be kind of hard to trust again."

stede had deflated at that, thinking of ed all alone all night on a dock, alone, alone, gradually realized he'd been... stede had abandoned him. how stede knows ed loves him but isn't really sure just yet if ed *trusts* him anymore. maybe he's so wounded by stede's abandonment that he doesn't feel like he can speak up when he hates everything stede is doing to and in his beautiful, beloved body!

oluwande had sighed. "talk to him, captain."

"...you're right, you're right. i will."

stede is going to. he is going to bring it up. he is going to start a difficult conversation with his partner, ON PURPOSE. he's abandoned the aristocracy, so there's no call continuing to dance around every issue like it will disappear if looked at in the light!

he's going to be more like ed, who just says things when he's upset, even when it's visibly difficult for him because he is courageous and strong-hearted--

(at no point does stede make the leap to 'and therefore if ed had a problem with the sex we were having he, unlike me, would actually say something.' empathy machine out of service)

anyway uh fuck theres a plot probably? some kind of plot? they work it out and then theres smut with pillow princess ed the end

[devilscastle69]

Hi, I just wanted to say I've seen a few of your posts recently and I just wanted to send internet hugs (if you like them). It sounds like you've been going through a hell of a lot and it makes so much sense that you're tired and overwhelmed and struggling every day.

When it comes to struggling to relating to people a) it makes so much sense, because you weren't given the chance to, but b) it's okay to have highly specific interests and not want to go outside of that. Lots of people do, both neutotypical and atypical. And as long as it's what you enjoy, that's all that matters. Some people might struggle with it, but that's a them problem, not a you problem. In your life, what you enjoy is the most important thing.

The crying when you were young and praying to go to purgatory, and knowing things were wrong but other's not? That sounds really hard, like you could tell there were dynamics going on and were trying to navigate them. Maybe you were better at spotting patterns so knew where to tread (again, sometimes people call this an autistic thing, but lots of people do this too), or maybe you just have higher anxiety than others and that was what drove everything. But your family sounds really hard, expecting you to just put up with homophobia instead of standing up for you. It kind of feels like your mum went back on accepting you, too, taking it okay one day and screaming at you a few days later. That's exactly the type of thing that you could have known would happen when you were younger, so you tried to not be the thing that would get you yelled at or excluded.

It sucks getting to this point in your life without knowing who you are, especially when it came with so much self-hatred, but I want to tell you that a lot of people love their 30s because they learn more about themselves and stop self-destructing and actually start living how they want to. Would it help to try and consider everything you've been through as an experience that taught you something? It sounds like you were just desperate to try and get things right and that's what lead to the self-hatred, but you shouldn't be blamed for trying to survive. And now, instead of continuing to feel self-hatred, you can actively choose to be nice to yourself, show yourself the compassion I know you show your friends ���� you're not wrong for standing up to your mum and sister, that means that you're standing up for yourself, and your younger self would be so in awe of you for doing that 💚 sorry for the long ramble, feel free to call this weird from a stranger on the internet💚

tysm anon <33 i remind myself a lot that im in a much better place than i was even a year ago like physically, emotionally, spiritually, but sometimes things happen and i feel overwhelmed. im also still trying to stand up for myself appropriately and i was upset bc i was actively trying to communicate how i was feeling without like trying to blame her and she exploded probs out of guilt or confusion or grief or outright denial & it was really viscous and hurtful! but im def trying to work on getting my brain to be like "wow!!! that really sucked!!! fuck that!" instead of "i want to kms!!!! fr this time!!!" (it's never all the way fr but it feels fr in the moment) my fam is complicated and the dynamics are pretty fucked and ik why they are that way but knowing that doesnt fix anything bc itd be even worse attempting to point it out bc i have a pretty good idea for how itd go unfortch.

anyway appreciate the thoughts and support. i do go to therapy and do the self care i think it was too many events all at once. <3 hope u have a great day/night/etc.

[mindovermatterismagicc]

finally the time i can write on here as youre asleep.

you look so beautiful tonight

i just miss you so much and everything been happening lately has just confused me so much. for you it might have been that you dodged a bullet by not coming here but what about me? what have i done to be receiving this? like just one day of all that excitement and joy for what? i saw that being stolen right from my own hands. like why, what have i done to deserve it and all the times you couldnt come here before? im not saying its your fault baby i know you try your best each time but when will i be capable enough of getting it. im just so tired man, ive been looking forward about it since the initial month we started talking but till this date even after fasting for it and doing as much i could, you decide to steal it right from my hands all between a span of a day? why god why.

its the voice in my head, what do you mean im not ready still what the fuck is to be ready to literally her come see me for days. why do i have to be ready for that like how does that make sense. what do you mean when the times right? 9 months. how long are you going to make me wait? and forget waiting why would you give me so much hope each time and take it all away like why the taunting, i feel so humiliated.

if youre reading this baby this was just a monologue of me and the voice in my head please ignore this last paragraph

but yeah, man is greedy, its true. im a greedy man but im a greedy man for the things i love, well ofcourse every man is like that but whatever. i want to take a moment to just rewind and stop crying and begging for a second. im typing this at 1:33am on 11/10/2023 as i watch you sleep. you, its you. youve been my dream girl for years, 3 years ago i wish i could be in this position and 9 months ago i just wished i could see you once. wow. years ago i just wised someone would love me and now that i have that i beg that it be physical, atleast its something but like damn. im a loved man, a girl i love so much, loves me too. wow. i love you so much baby. but then its like if i had to wait 3 years just to get love, ill have to wait for it be physical too, its that i know that day would come but the thought that when will kills me.

i just want to cry in your arms, i just want to ball my eyes out i just want your arms to wrap around me and say its all okay im here now, im typing this and im crying on the inside but i cant find the tears for it just today.

im sorry this isnt a physical relationship i know you stick w touch a lot but i wish baby, i wish, and i hope everything i give you is enough just please dont leave me. im so scared.

i love you so so much.

i miss you and well here it goes another post to the mindovermagic account on which vivaan begs to see her but like all the previous 72 posts and months of wishing, another one down the hole. when will it ever be enough? 100? probably not then too but my fingers hurt.

fuck man, another post. i feel like a speaker with a stuck audio. i just want to see you and ill do anything to do so, just please the next one not be false hope, only give me a sign if youre really going to make it happen, im tired of the heartbreak.

[berryunho]

pls i typed that ask at like 4am after the show i’m so surprised i got that many details bc half of the show feels like a blackout i literally ??? have videos of wooyoung that i don’t remember taking so when watching those i was like ah. wooyoung bias indeed i love him <3 AND LISTEN I GET WHAT UR SAYING but the loyal lifestyle just. isn’t for me. i’m loyal to atz only (not even) bc hj would k word me for LoOkInG aT oThEr OpPaS but. wooyoung. is a menace. he deserves the slander sometimes /lh

AND ! no one gets me the way san does bc WOOYOUNG’s hair is black when i wanted oreo but san did everything my delusional little brain manifested (aka wear the outfits i wanted him to) like ?? there is no way there won’t be an era of me having san as my bias </3 like listen.. i don’t wanna be delulu and stuff.. even tho i might be a little.. but a while ago i said i wanted san to wear sage green for a layout that i never even made.. n literally the next day he was on the radio or something wearing a green cardigan.. tell me he’s not meant to be my bias u literally can’t

also when i first started stanning atz it was wooyoung who pulled me in !! and weirdly i stayed loyal for a LONG time even when hongruella looked THAT fine during the last tour (literally. saw hongruella in the flesh on my bday. imagine. how did i stay loyal) but i always thought it was a bit weird?? bc i usually gravitate towards the introverts for literally any group/artist (tho i.. only stan atz rn.. oop hongjoong u better jot this down rn i am the most loyal atiny ever/j) so i thought it was a little bit out of order for me to like and stay loyal to THE extroverted social butterfly.. but then my bias line was completed with both infps aka my mbti.. and it suddenly made sense dhsjsh i just ! gravitate towards san a lil now AND ESPECIALLY AFTER THIS CONCERT he’s truly one of my fav comfort ppl like.. he said something and immediately after i was like WRITE THAT DOWN!!! and opened my notes app to write it down LMAO my friend was like wtf are u doing and i was like uh. comfort words??

last thing before i nap… san shyly dancing to cyberpunk for us again during the concert.. take my heart RN sir it’s literally! urs ! and thanks hwa for making that happen i died a lil

anyway i’m good and i hope you’re good as well <3 mwah mwah -san anon

HI !!!!

4am !!!!??$))(# wow you were quite coherent for 4am im also surprised LOL BUT THATS SO FAIR I GET IT ADJKFLASKJF its inevitable to jump around when you're a kpop stan like when 8 lovable men are presented to you .... why have only one bitch when you can have five ! KJLFDKSJAFSLJKDF

PLS THE MANIFESTING AKLDFJSKDFJ i love it i am a huge fan of being delulu i think life is too boring if you dont let yourself have a little joke around every once in a while AND BELIEVING THAT COINCIDENCES ARE MANIFESTATIONS.... IM HERE FOR IT !!!

eheheh i enjoy learning this lore about you san anon... i agree you are very strong for being loyal despite hongruella on your bday like .... thats crazy .... like i got my american ass on an airplane and flew to germany last may to see hongruella in the flesh .... in a completely loyal to yunho way of course ! JAKDJFSDFLJK BUT omg that actually is pretty interesting !!! id say yunho very much falls in line w my usual bias "type" lol but its funny bc that Type is just. the Opposite Of Me. BUT ANYWAYS hehe i get it ! all of them are just so ... <333 and literally why have i never thought of busting the notes app out that's actually so smart oh em gee ....

but ehehe san is so funny like how are we gonna be shy sir !!! after everything !!! hehe i hope your nap was good <3 im quite good ehehe a little bit nervous ........ but overall good hehe anything else exciting going on in your life san anon? hehe mwahhhh

[mossible]

ALRIGHT i’d like to preface that this is most likely gonna be really rambly (mostly due to excitement), but i promise that some questions will be sprinkled here and there as well, just bear with me LMAO ANYWAYS

with that out the way, i just finished reading all the chapters you’ve released of Cracked Snowglobes so far, and WOW you’ve done such an amazing job with it!! seriously, the way you’ve characterized everyone, especially octavio, just makes my heart sing. i feel like nintendo’s slept on developing octavio within splatoon’s story modes when there’s SO much available that they could work with, so reading your interpretation is such a fresh breath of air. what inspired you to write it from his perspective?

also, i love how splatoon’s silliness and flair is still present without interrupting the genuine and heartfelt scenes; the story naturally ebbs and flows (sorry not sorry :)) between the two wonderfully, it’s really a treat to read. speaking of the pacing, you’ve done the cuttletavio content SO WELL. i really appreciate the seeds you’ve planted throughout the story, because it creates a solid foundation for their relationship to grow from and, well, make their development believable! after all, the two of them have been through a LOT, so it makes sense that’d it take a while to work through it all.

before i finish, here’s some misc. questions for you! what have you learned about yourself while writing this fic? did of any scenes leave you stumped on how you were gonna approach it? what’s your greatest strength and weakness as a writer? and lastly, what’s your favorite scene you’ve written so far? feel free to answer as many or as few of those questions as you’d like!

thank you so much for the time and effort you’ve put into the fic so far!! it’s evident you’ve done your research, and i can’t wait to read what comes next! wherever the story goes, i’ll be there for the ride!! :))

OMG HI!! sorry this took like a day to get to but holy shit this is such a thorough and well thought out ask im like. in awe thank u so much for sending all of this in

if i thanked you for every incredibly kind thing u said throughout this entire ask i would fr be typing for like. hours so i will consolidate that all here; THANK U SO MUCH FOR UR KIND WORDS OMG !! i am so glad that youre enjoying the fic so far, and that you think so highly of it ?? i am absolutely blown away every time yall give me such encouraging feedback like this thank u so much!

ok on to the questions though!

what inspired you to write it from [octavio's] perspective? ok well funnily enough, you sort of answered your own question, (at least, the second half of what my reasoning is lol,) in the paragraph before you even asked it nintendo has ABSOLUTELY slept on octavio's more indepth nuances, i totally agree! i think to fully contextualize why i chose to write his perspective specifically, i do need to let myself be a little smug and say that i just so happened to revisit and reread Dissonant Melody in its entirety this summer, long before the b-sides were ever being posted. it. oh my god it fuckign awoke something in my brain and gave me cuttletavio brainrot BAD up until the new game was released and even then that absolutely did NOT help considering how our beloved dj got such an awesome spot in the limelight during the final boss. to summarize, though, i decided to stick with his pov partly because i felt i was not alone in my own personal sentiments over him and how silly and interesting of a guy he is, that others would also probably enjoy to see his pov, (as well as the octarian pov as a whole,) quite a lot. the other part is just that i had baaad brainrot and also that he is so silly and i wanted to write him interacting w cap'n more. bc, again, nintendo!!! youre sleeping on these two!!!! quit making us writers and artists do all the work for you tell us what they were like before the war!!!

ok i said i wouldnt repeat myself over and over again thanking you but!!! ahhh im so glad that the humorous beats i wrote landed. ive genuinely always been someone who cannot handle something serious without it being just a little silly and goofy on the side, just to make it feel. believable i guess? that the world isn't as dark as it sometimes seems? that and just. most people who know who i am as a person know where a lot of my influences lie and that a lot of it is in comedic source material, so there's that as well.

what have you learned about yourself while writing this fic? did of any scenes leave you stumped on how you were gonna approach it? i am going to lump these two questions together bc i think my answer will go hand in hand. i have been very much humbled to the fact that i am naught but a humble young adult who has yet to truly drop the young part and quote, unquote, "grow up" as they say. …by which i mean; my scope of the world is very very limited, and for as much research as i am able to do about a fictional, sci-fi-esque, futuristic society dominated by evolved mollusks, there is just as much real life experience that i feel would change the entire trajectory of this fic, were i to have it under my belt. perhaps some future plot points i have prewritten would theoretically play out much differently? perhaps some characters would be characterized differently, leading to said different plot points? perhaps, we will never know… perhaps, though, there are some experiences that i will never feasibly be able to live through to then incorporate into my writing. like living for over a century to reunite with my scorned, ex-whatever the hell these two are! specifically addressing the second question with that in mind, i can say, without spoilers, that there is indeed a scene that i'm working on right now funnily enough that is. stumping me quite a bit. i'll let your mind and the context i provided before to fill in the blanks on what could possibly be in store that i'm trying to figure out how to approach next.

what’s your greatest strength and weakness as a writer? and lastly, what’s your favorite scene you’ve written so far? i'll group these last two questions together as well because i have both a short and a long answer to at least part both of them; DIALOGUE!!!! i adore writing dialogue so much i love it when characters interact and say things and when i am able to study and practice their vocal quirks and nuances in such a way that it paints not just a picture of two plot devices talking to move the story along, but two very much matching or opposing sides to a discussion that has been thoroughly baked into the narrative. that and i like making nintendo characters say things that the NA localizers would never have the balls to make them say. not just in a swearing way but in an actually natural and not trying-and-failing-to-be-hip-with-the-kids type of way. (sorry NA team i still love yalls work but sometimes it doesnt seem like yall even read the JP text at all </3) to answer the second half of the question though, i do think that my weakness is feeling a bit too comfortable writing dialogue and the like. as someone who got got their start in writing from roleplaying online, whether as canon characters or ocs, i can say for certain that it is physically impossible for someone to perfectly mimic how a character acts in canon, down to a T. you can absolutely get close, don't get me wrong! but everyone's always going to view their fave or their muse in a different light than how someone else views them. humans are perfectly imperfect, and the things that we create and put out into the world are equally such. there are most definitely a lot of times where i will let my own preferences and biases for how a scene should play out cloud my judgement, and, as a result, i write myself into a future plot hole when it comes to consistent characterization. still love dialogue though <3 speaking of things i love! that last question… hmm… i think i had the most fun writing callie's final scene in chapter 3, but genuinely everything that involved the octarians in chapter 2 is a close close close second! esp stella's little scene. i talked about this a little bit in the comments on ao3, but, without spoilers i can absolutely promise yall that she is coming back. she has evolved from just a side character to my dear sweet little scrumply munchkin she is my scrimblo. sorry shes just really fun to think about and im excited to write her more </3

[lee-minhoe]

Hi!!! Omg its been a minute, my weekends are so busy I can never get time just sit down and type these out im sorry Mel. But omg yesss that video of Minho showing Jeongin the dance is one of my absolute favorite videos! Especially because it really shows how soft he is for Jeongin, even when he’s not getting something or messing up Minho is endlessly patient but also teases him about it.

I totally get trying to like just one group, especially when they have so many members. Every group I liked when I first got into Kpop I was like ok its JUST going to be this one… these two…. Just these three and now I think my wrapped said I listened to like 200 Kpop groups this year lmao. All your groups are suchhh good choices I stan most of them too! I think p1h is the only one I haven’t really listed to  yet, mostly cause they debuted at the beginning of the huge jump in groups debuting that’s happened over the last few years, and I find them all so overwhelming. But omg I love flying, I really feel like they don’t get talked about enough when it comes to really good bands, hun is my Bias and they’re just a really silly group, I’m sure u’ll love them when u learn their names! Ok I listened to those nine.i songs and consider me sold omg?! Crazy that I’ve literally never heard of them before, like not even in passing, but I thank you for sharing because im hooked now haha. I totally get you on the gg thing, I like a few ggs a lot but I never ned up really following their regular content for some reason, and most I can only name a member or two just because I don’t get the consistency of seeing their faces all the time like with the bgs I stan. 

Ok what are some of your favorite colors or aesthetics? Also are there any looks/eras for Minho that are your favorites? (so I can start working on your present 🤭)

-🍒

omg i read your first sentence "it's been a minute" and idk if you're an nct fan but i immediately thought of mark's rap in misfit hahaha vampire mark my beloved

no worries about the later reply, i hope you are doing well <3 and yes one of my fav things about lino is how you can see he changes the way he acts based on who he's with, like he is savage with seungmin but so soft with lix 🥺 (and jeongin too)

omg 200 groups on your spotify wrapped??? wow HAHAHA i love that <3 i remember when i first got into kpop in 2020 and my wrapped started saying that kpop was my top genre of the year and i was like oh no haha but now im like whatever i fully embrace it, 90% of my listening is kpop (maybe higher if you also count like krnb/k-indie and stuff lol). it's part of my personality now 😂 what was your top artist? and yes n.flying's music is so good!! i love the kbands :)) when i learn their names i will let you know who becomes my bias LOL. why is hun your bias hehe

YEAH THE NINE.I SONGS ARE SO GOOD i love the rock sound (?) in the songs, and the boys are such cuties too. they debuted earlier this year so it makes sense not a lot of people have heard of them yet (i only found them because i was listening to this k-rock playlist on spotify hahaha), but i think they have potential if they keep going in this direction ^^ i'm looking forward to seeing where they go

my top favorite color is blue 💙 i also love pastel colors in general!! oh and favorite minho looks/eras.......gosh where do i start hahaha 😂 hmmmmm well i really like the thunderous and maniac eras for lino!! let me list some of my favs (this might get long lol)

this thunderous outfit

this thunderous outfit 2

lino was so hot here lol

gods menu

literally any of the all in outfits

any of the maniac outfits LOL

in general i love when he wears a button down shirt and or suit lmaoo and when he has a bw cap on 🥴 or when he smiles hes just the cutest 🥺 honestly anything lino related and i will melt, i am very easy to please hahahaha