#wow no sad topics in this bio am i feeling okay

[slcwshow]

reading your daily horoscope. making up constellations. going where the wind takes you. life on the road. lazy summer afternoons. a ring on every finger. silver necklaces and patterned shirts. a collage of posters and concert tickets. the alleged van. an impulsive tattoo, given by a friend. talking late into the night. a smoky laugh. the mysteries of the universe. dying your own hair. hands covered in clay. befriending the neighbourhood cats.

statistics.

full name:  felix tagana-aguirre nickname(s): fe (fee) name meaning:  happy, fortunate age:  twenty-six date of birth:  june 29th star sign:  cancer place of birth:  castle village, galdoran current location:  wherever the road takes them (but, like, pelican town) gender:  non-binary pronouns:  he/they sexual orientation:  pansexual occupation:  travelling merchant family:  nicanor “nic” tagana-aguirre (father), sara tagana-aguirre (mother), carmen tagana-aguirre (older sister) education level:  high school graduate (barely) living arrangements:  lives in his van (which is also his shop) loved gifts:  coconut, spicy eel, clay hated gifts:  mayonnaise, coleslaw, raisins

biography.

Felix was born in Castle Village, a distant town known for its community of adventurers.

His mother and father, Sara and Nic, perhaps aren’t the sort of people you’d immediately associate with heroics and monster slaying. They’re both bermuda-shorts-wearing, fanny-pack-owning, glasses-on-a-string-around-the-neck types, aggressively pleasant and unfailingly kind. Their interest is less in killing monsters as it is in researching them, and they established the local tourist trap museum as a means of displaying all they've discovered.

Always an aimless kind of kid, Danny imagined they’d spend most of their life working the desk at his parents' museum, because it was easy and didn't require any major planning on their part. Their mom and dad are very supportive of their youngest child, to the point where it might've actually been hindering their ability to grow as adult, so Felix never felt any great pressure to get their life started.

Ultimately his impetus to leave Castle Village came on the back of the breakup of his first major relationship (they decided to just be friends, which is chill). Felix finally got around to fixing up the old van that'd sat on his parents' drive for the last eight years, and set off on his travels.

They’ve been roaming around the Ferngill Republic for the better part of a year now, collecting things from all over the continent and selling them to the residents of the small towns he passes through. It's a pretty sweet existence, all things considered, and he wonders if he'll ever feel inclined to settle in one place again.

other things.

Felix tunes into Welwick’s Oracle on the radio every day, and always checks his horoscope in the newspaper (even if he doesn’t intend to buy it).

Their van is a complete jalopy, but the exterior is painted with a mural of the night sky, done by their own hand.

He’s a pretty good potter, but would probably be a great potter if he spent more time practising… or if he had somewhere to fire the ceramics he makes.

A not-insignificant portion of the van's interior storage is taken up by tapes. Felix keeps telling themselves they’ll upgrade their music system to a CD player one of these days, but they never quite get around to it.

Even though he's only in town a couple of days a week, Felix is some kind of videogame savant, and currently holds the high score on the Journey to the Prairie King arcade machine at the Stardrop Saloon.

Sincerely believes in all things supernatural, and is very knowledgeable on the topic thanks to his parents.

They’ve played bass since they were a kid, and used to be in a band with their high school friends (they weren’t very good).

[pudgecuddles]

My Content & Boundaries

[No need to be alarmed! Nothing has happened to prompt this, I just figured it was about time that I pin a post like this.]

Welcome to my kink blog! This post is here to introduce myself, disclose what type of content that I may reblog or post here (including trigger warnings) and state my boundaries concerning who I want and don’t want interacting with me or my blog.

Intro:

Hi! I’m pudgecuddles! I’ve been here in the community as a lurker since 2018, and finally got around to making this sideblog about 2 years ago under the handle “prettypudgy”. I changed my username slightly after some twitter douchecanoes took screenshots of my content and made threads mocking it.

I am 24 years old and identify as female. Please use she/her pronouns when referring to me. I won’t be mad at all though if you use they/them or he/him, but I’ll probably just gently let you know what I prefer  :)

I am aromantic/asexual, meaning that I do not experience romantic or sexual attraction to people of any gender identity or expression. I still experience aesthetic attraction, and of course enjoy the concept of weight gain as a kink.

Although I am participating in them, I am not looking for RP partners at the moment!

My Content and the Content I Reblog:

Although I do like fluffy and mild WG content (ya’ll who make that type of content are amazing and beautiful and deserve all the love and reblogs in the world), I do enjoy darker and less popular tropes/kinks as well. Up until recently the majority of the stuff I’ve reblogged has been cute and moderate, but I have been working on my own stories and RPs which happen to be on the more intense/darker side.

My content going forward may include topics such as:

Extreme Weight Gain Immobility Mind Break Pet/Pig Play BDSM Humiliation Manipulation Feminization Dub-Con Watersports Eproctophilia Slob Abusive Relationships (it’s not something I enjoy writing, but I may reblog it)

I will always tag specific topics and tropes that may not be for everyone such as immobility or fart kink stuff. And definitely triggering content such as dub-con or degradation. For example, I will tag it as “Immobility”, “cw Immobility” and “tw Immobility”, in case someone has only one tag blacklisted.

Please keep yourself safe! This community is supposed to be a comfortable, creative area where users can curate a homepage of content that matches thier tastes and respects their boundaries. I will not be offended at all if you decide to block me or my written/rendered content. All I ask is if you’re already an acquaintance or mutual of mine that you let me know before you do  :)  You don’t even need to tell me why, I just don’t want to wonder if I made you mad or were ignoring me on purpose.

Zero hard feelings, seriously! The block button is there to protect you!

Boundaries:

Please do not hit on me, or unexpectedly discus sexual topics without me knowing your age and instigating it. It is different if I already know you and am comfortable speaking with you like that.

Yes: Pudgecuddles: Wow that drawing is ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) You, 18+: Wanna see him get bigger? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

No: Pudgecuddles: Wow! I love your line work! It’s so clean and really compliment’s the shading! You, 18+: Wanna see him get bigger? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

No: Pudgecuddles: Wow! I love your line work! It’s so clean and really compliment’s the shading! You, 16: Wanna see him get bigger? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Yes: Pudgecuddles: Wow! I love your line work! It’s so clean and really compliment’s the shading! You, 16: Thank you so much! ^_^  What do you think about the shape of his hands?

Minors: If you do not have your age, (or at least an 18+ only, or “I am an adult!”) in your bio, I will either ask you for your age or choose not to interact directly with you. This is not a punishment or a personal vendetta. I just do not feel comfortable interacting directly with minors when it comes to NSFW kink content. I am okay with reblogging your content, as supporting those in the community that are still young and exploring their identities in a safe and distant way is very important to me. I am so happy for you that you have found a welcoming and protective space to safely explore your sexuality and discuss your favorite groups. It’s what I wish I had when I was younger.

But I ask that you don’t attempt to private message me or participate in conversations that are sexual in nature.

Bigotry: Do not interact with me, my blog or my content if you do not support all LGBTQ+ identities. This includes but is not limited to: Transgender folk, Bisexuals, Pansexuals, Polysexuals, Omnisexuals, Asexuals, Aromantics and Non-Binary/Agender peeps. TERFs, exclusionists and Battleaxe Bisexuals are not welcome and will be insta-blocked. Same with those that participate in “discourse” on these topics.

If you do not believe that Black Lives Matter or support Donald Trump or any conservative party, politician or policy, please unfollow and block me. They have killed thousands of people and actively lobby against minorities.

This is the only time that I will be political on this blog. I am infinitely more outspoken/advocating on my main, but this sideblog is supposed to be a stress-free, kinky escape from the horrors of reality. I go on my main to reblog petitions, I go on here to reblog erotica.

This does not mean that I do not care, or that I am not an ally or that I enable racists or transphobes. It just means that I recognize that sometimes people get burnt out from constantly being reminded of the policies that harm them, or acts of violence against their race. I want this blog to be an escape, for both myself and my followers.

Hate/Trolling: Hateful or negative comments on me or my friend’s content will get your account blocked. This ranges from “ew” to telling them to kill themselves. This behavior is not tolerable anywhere, and the more extreme comments will be reported to Tumblr staff. Comments saying our content is disgusting will automatically tell me you think it’s hot and are in denial. How very sad. I will dedicate my grossest story to you specifically.

Inter-Community Drama: Mob behavior, brigading, witch hunting, call out posts (vague or by name), vitriolic hate and bullying of any type is something that makes me extremely uncomfortable due to having experienced cyberbullying in the past. Making people deactivate, continuing to attack them after apologies and other related behavior will get you blocked no matter the quality of your content, your standing in the community or our relationship history.

I cannot deal with seeing that behavior and it scares me continuing to interact with those that I learn can so easily turn on their friends like that.

That’s All Folks!

[gins-potter]

Med 6x13 Thoughts

Nat's mum is getting sicker from the Med? *pretends to be shocked*

Will apologising? Who are you and what have you done with my favourite redhead?

Oh Will you really thought she was gonna wanna date you after that? Poor sweet dumb Will

Wait, no Maggie this ep? Sad face

Noooooo Sharon

This is so not the point but Sharon is wearing like converses/sneakers and it's kind of funny

Again kinda off topic but why do they have open lockers in the doctor's room thingo

Yay Maggie!

Waittttttt please tell me that's not Maggie's daughter, or at least if she is, that Maggie doesn't know she is

Ok, that is so her

Smooth Nat... not

That's not creepy at all, Crockett

Is that the same actor who's always played Bert?

Poor Sharon

Another sidenote but Epatha is such a great actress

Of course Will's gonna get into trouble over this

Is this... Dean... actually being nice?

Aaaaaaand of course he ignores April's suggestion

Oh Maggie is so gonna see her again

Altho if anyone could stick to her word about not seeing their bio daughter again it would be Maggie

Crockett don't be an ass

CROCKETT DON'T BE AN ASS

CROCKETT STOP BEING AN ASS

CROCKETT STOP BEING A FUCKING HYPOCRITE

"if you've got a problem with me don't bring it into the medicine" mate you're the one who walked in with a stick up your ass just because Will dared to touch your girlfriend on the arm

"you don't openly contradict me" what like you did?

Crockett my like for you is very tenuous and you're fucking pushing it

Wow so when Ethan suggests the SP tube it's a great idea, but not when April suggest it, I see how it is

Sharon do not walk in that room

Sharon stop walking in that room

Sharon leave that room

I'm trying so hard to feel sorry for this mother but like what the fuck was your son out riding on his own, in the dark, with no helmet

Dean don't go there

There's the asshole Dean we all know and don't love

Dean what the fuck is wrong with you?

"I never suggested that" bro you preempted the whole procedure but commenting on how close April and Ethan are, how is that not suggesting it?

Manipulative little jackass

Awww Bert, I never really liked you but that was cute

Okay I'll give Crockett the credit here, something *is* off with Nat at the moment

Crockett you were really pissing me off like twenty minutes ago and now I kinda feel sorry for you

Wow I am so shocked that Vanessa applied to Gaffney, so shocked

An olive branch from Dean mayhaps?

Deleting footage every 72 hours sounds very unsafe but okay

Nat you're a fucking terrible actor

O shit, that poor mum

I mean she kinda annoyed me but clearly she's doing the best she can

Sharon my motherfucking heart

It's such a small thing but like sometimes when you're down you just need that hand reaching down to help you up

A pretty solid episode

I mean it certainly made me feel things

[cctinsleybaxter]

2020 in books

2020 was a year of changed reading habits; people reading more than ever or not at all, some changing their tastes and others turning to old comforts. While there weren’t any huge overhauls on my end, more free time did mean a total of 32 in a wider range of genres. In the past couple of years I found a lot of the things I read to be kind of middling and ranked them accordingly, but this year had some strong contenders in the mix. With college officially behind me I love nonfiction again, and I really need to stop being drawn in by novels with long titles that ‘sound interesting.’ A piece of advice to my future self: they will only make you angry.

The Good

The Idiot by Fyodor Dostoevsky I loved the BBC radio play when I first listened to it back in 2017, but didn’t know if I could stomach the idea of actually reading the 700-page book, especially since I already knew the plot (spoiler alert: this had no effect and I gasped multiple times despite knowing what was going to happen; Fyodor’s just that good at atmosphere.) The story follows Prince Lev Myshkin, a goodhearted but troubled man entering 1860s Petersburg high society and meeting all of the wretched people therein as he navigates life, laughs, love, unanswerable questions of faith, and human suffering. I care about it in the same way I think other people care about reality TV shows and soap operas. I’m so personally invested in the drama and feel so many different emotions directed at these clowns that it’s like being a fan of Invitation to Love (with an ending equally upsetting to that of the show ITL is from, Twin Peaks.)

Salt: A World History by Mark Kurlanksy I adored this book. The first half reads a little like a Wikipedia article, and I was worried that it was leaning too clinical and would be disaffected with colonialism and indigenous peoples, but even that oversight is corrected for as the text goes on. It’s not going to be for everybody because it really is just the world’s longest encyclopedia entry on, well, salt, but it’s written with such excitement for the topic and is so well-researched and styled for commercial nonfiction that I think it deserves any and all praise it’s gotten. We have to talk about that time Cheshire was literally sinking into the ground, and companies who were over-pumping brine water to steal each other’s brine water said ‘no it’s okay it’s supposed to that’ so were legally dismissed as suspects.

Midnight Cowboy by James Leo Herlihy Cried. 10/10. The plot of Midnight Cowboy is very classic and actually has a lot in common with The Idiot, as 20-something Joe Buck moves from the American Southwest to NYC and meets myriad challenges as a sex worker. I’ve been obsessed with the movie for a few years now and the book made me appreciate it anew; I think it’s rare for an adaptation to take the risk of being so different from its source material while still capturing its spirit. The movie doesn’t include quieter moments like the full conversation with Towny or time spent in the X-flat, nor does it attempt to touch Joe’s internal monologue or his and Rico’s extensive backstories, but these things are essential to the book and are some of the best and most affecting writing I’ve ever read. Finally! The Great American Novel!

The Only Good Indians by Stephen Graham Jones I would firmly like to say that this is probably the best horror novel ever written. The setup is very traditional in that it’s about a group of friends facing supernatural comeuppance for a past mistake, but delivery on that premise is anything but familiar. A story about personal and cultural trauma that raises questions about what we owe to each other and what it means to be Blackfeet, with a cast that’s unbelievably real and sympathetic even at their absolute worst. Creepypasta writers trying to cash in on the cultural mythos of lumped-together tribes wish they were capable of writing something a tenth as gruesome and good as this. It could very well be a movie the visuals and writing style were so arresting, and I can’t wait to read whatever Jones writes next.

Found Footage Horror Films: Fear and the Appearance of Reality by Alexandra Heller-Nicholas This is the least accessible title on the list since it’s a college textbook for people with background in film, but it was so nice to read a woman unpacking film theory with the expertise and confidence it deserves that I have to rank it among the best. I had an absolute blast reading it and am going to have to stop myself from bringing up the horror of 1960s safety films as a cocktail icebreaker.

Blood in the Water: The Attica Prison Uprising of 1971 and Its Legacy by Heather Ann Thompson

The year’s toughest read by far, but also its most rewarding. Thompson uses mountains of documents, government-buried intel, and personal interviews to explain what happened at Attica from beginning to end, and does a fantastic job of balancing hard facts and ‘unbiased journalism’ with much-needed emotion and critical analysis. It’s more important reading in the 2020s than any kind of ‘why/how to not be racist’ book club book is going to be, and the historical context it provides is as interesting as it is invaluable. The second half drags a bit in going through lengthy trial processes with some assumed baseline knowledge of legalese (which I did not have. All that criminal minds in 2015… meaningless), but aside from that editing and prose are some of the best I’ve seen in nonfiction. 

The Bad

The Woman in the Window by A.J. Finn A friend and I decided to read this together because I’m obsessed with how insane the author is and wanted to know if he can actually write.

He cannot.

The Beautiful Thing That Awaits Us All by Laird Barron Barron is an indie darling of the horror fiction scene, so I was excited to finally read one of his collections but can now attest that I hate him. If you’re going to do Lovecraft please deconstruct Lovecraft in an interesting way. I had actually written a lot about the issues I have with how he develops characters and plots, but one of the only shorthand notes I took was “he won’t stop saying ‘bole’ instead of tree trunk” and I feel like that’s the only review we need.

Bats of the Republic by Zach Dodson Look up a photo of this author because if I had bothered to glance at the jacket bio I honest-to-god wouldn’t have even tried reading this.

This Is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone I went in with high expectations since this is an epistolary novella I’d seen praised on tumblr and youtube but oh my god was there a reason I was seeing it praised on tumblr and youtube. This is bad Steven Universe fanfiction. Both authors included ‘listening to the Steven Universe soundtrack throughout’ in the acknowledgements, and to add insult to injury there’s a plug from my nemesis Madeline Miller.

The 7½ Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle by Stuart Turton The premise of this one plays with so many tropes I like that I should have been more suspicious. It’s a dinner party with stock characters one would expect of Clue, and rather than our protagonist being the detective he’s a man with amnesia stuck in a 24-hour time loop. Body-hopping between guests, he must gather evidence using the skillsets of each ‘host’ until he either solves Evelyn Hardcastle’s murder or the limit of eight hosts runs out. I read a lot of not-very-good books, and it’s so, so much worse when they have potential to be fun. This is how you lose the most points, and how I abandon decorum and end up writing a list of grievances: • Our protagonist can only inhabit male hosts, which I think is a stupid writing decision not because I’m ‘woke’ but because wouldn’t it make sense for him to also be working with the maids, cooks, and women close to the murder victim? • Complaining about the limitations of hosts makes some sense (e.g- there’s a section where he thinks that it’s hard to be an old man because it’s difficult to get to the places he needs to be quickly), but one of his hosts is a rapist and one of his hosts is fat. Guess which one gets complained about more. • One of the later hosts is just straight-up a cop with cop knowledge that singlehandedly solves the case. We spend some time being like ‘wow I couldn’t have done it without the info all eight hosts helped gather’ but it was 100% the detective and he solves the murder using information he got off-screen. • The mystery itself is actually well-paced and I didn’t have a lot of issues with it (e.g, there’s a twist that I guessed only shortly before the end), which makes it all the worse that the metanarrative of this book is INSANE. No spoilers but the reveal as to why our unnamed protagonist is even in this situation is stupid. I just know they’re going to make it into a movie and I’m preemptively going to aaaaaaaaa!!!

Trust Exercise by Susan Choi The fact that this was the worst book I read all year, worse even than the bad Steven Universe fanfiction, and it won multiple awards makes my blood boil. I could rant about it for hours but just know that it’s a former theater kid’s take on perception and memory, and deals with sexual abuse in a way that’s handled both very badly and with a level of fake deepness that’s laughable. Select fake-deep quotes I copied down because at one point I said ‘oh barf’ aloud: -I’m filled with melancholy that’s almost compassion. It’s sad the same way. -[On a friendship ending] We almost never know what we know until after we know it. -Because we’re none of us alone in this world. We injure each other.

There are also bad sex scenes that I can’t quite make fun of because I think (HOPE?) they’re supposed to be a melodramatic take on how teenagers view sex, but I very much wanted to die. Flowers were alluded to. Nipples were compared to diamonds.

Honorable/Dishonorable Mentions (categorized as the same thing because, well,)

The Life and Death of Sophie Stark by Anna North This book was frustrating because the first third of it is fantastic. It’s set up to be a takedown of the manic pixie dream girl trope, jumping from person to person discussing their relationship with the titular Sophie, and indirectly revealing that she was just some girl and not the difficult and mysterious genius they all believed her to be. Then in the third act, BAM! She was that difficult and mysterious genius and she’s now indirectly brought all the people from her past together. I wanted to scream the plot beefed it so bad, but the good news is I really liked this octopus description.

It was the size of a three-year-old child, and it seemed awful to me that something could be so far from human and obviously want something as badly as it wanted to get out of the tank.

Radium Girls: The Dark Story of America’s Shining Women by Kate Moore Cool new nightmare speedrun strat is to hear a 2-second anecdote from a documentary that people used to get radium poisoning from painting watch faces, be curious enough that you buy a book to learn more, and be met with medical and legal horror beyond anything you could have imagined. This was almost one of my favorite books of the year! Almost.

Radium Girls is very lovingly crafted and incredibly well-researched; one of those things that’s hard to get through but that you want to read sections of again as soon as you’ve finished. The umbrage I take with it is that it’s very Catholic. The author and many of her subjects are Irish and their religion is important to them, but it casts a martyr-y narrative over the whole thing that I found uncomfortable. Seventeen-year-old girls taking a factory job they didn’t know was dangerous are framed as brave, working-class heroes, but there’s not a set moral lesson to be gained from this story. Sarah Maillefer didn’t make “a sacrifice” when she agreed to the first radium tests, she agreed because she was terrified. She didn’t think she was helping she was begging for help.

The Mushroom at the End of the World: On the Possibility of Life in Capitalist Ruins by Anna Tsing Tsing is an incredibly skilled researcher and ethnographer; there are so many good ideas in this book that I’d almost consider it essential leftist text… if I could stand the way it was structured. Tsing posits that because nature is built on precariousness she will build her book the same way, allowing it to grow like a mushroom, and thus chapters don’t progress linearly and are written more like freeform poetry than a series of academic arguments. Some people are really going to love that, but I’m me and a mushroom is a mushroom and a book is a book. I don’t think in the way Tsing does, and while I tried to keep an open mind it’s hard to play along when something is this academically dense and makes so many ambitious claims. As if to prove how different our structuring methods are, I’ve made my own thoughts into a pros and cons list

Things I liked: • ‘Contamination’ as something inherent to diversity • ‘Scalability’ as a flawed way of thinking (Tsing has written whole essays about this that I find very compelling, but a main example here is that China and the US have come down on Japanese matsutake research for being too ‘site specific’ and not yielding enough empirical data) • Discussing how Americans were so invested in self-regulating systems in the 1950s we thought they could be applied to literally everything, including ecosystems • “The survivors of war remind us of the bodies they climbed over- or shot- to get to us. We don’t know whether to love or hate the survivors. Simple moral judgements don’t come to hand.” • Any and all fieldwork Tsing shares is amazing; I especially liked reading about the culture of mushroom pickers living in the Cascades and their contained market system

Things I didn’t like: • Statements that sound deep but aren’t, e.g- “help is always in the service of another.” (Yep. That’s what that means. Unless an organism is doing something to help itself which then nullifies your whole opening argument.) • A very debatable definition of utilitarianism • “Capitalism vs pre-capitalism,” which seems like an insanely black-and-white stance for a book all about finding hidden middle ground • A chapter I found really interesting about how intertwined Japanese and American economies are, but it tries to cover the entire history of US-Japan relations. Seriously, starting with Governor Perry and continuing through present day, this could have been a whole different book and it’s a good example of what I mean when I say arguments feel too scattered (the conclusion it reaches is that in the 80s the yen was finally able to hold its own against the dollar. Just explain that part.) • A chapter arguing that ‘true biological mutualism’ is rarely a focus of STEM and is a new sociological development/way of thinking which is just… flat-out not true

For all the comparisons art gets to ‘being on a drug trip’ this anthropology textbook has come the closest for me. Moments of profound human wisdom, intercut with things I had trouble understanding because I wasn’t on the same wavelength, intercut with even more things that felt false or irrelevant. I can’t put it on the nice list but I am glad I read it.

[the-first-date]

A conversation with Ashley Pecorelli [25/F/Brooklyn]

Madge Maril: So, first things first, tell us a bit about yourself — hobbies, job, dog.

Ashley Pecorelli: Well! I am a queer mental health counselor-in-training (and hope to make mental health resources accessible to LGBTQ adolescents)! Besides REAL hobbies which I definitely have (?) I enjoy watching Property Brothers with my lil dog, Mitski, thinking about the Twilight saga at all times, and using The Sims to cathart. It is way harder than I thought it would be to write something about myself wow.

MM: Real Tinder bio hours.

AP: So my Tinder bio was most recently (I guess still is) a transcript of the ticket girl video, specifically when she says that she called the police station to see if she could serve jail time instead of paying the ticket. It says all you need to know about me.

MM: I'm going to find this video and hyperlink it. Did tinder work for you? I guess "work" being that you are now in love, as I gather.

AP: https://youtu.be/EujUx_82Bxs one step ahead of you. So I guess Tinder did "work" for me! Although honestly I never felt that it was overtly working against me because when I started using it in earnest, I really wasn't looking for something in particular.

MM: Ooo, I've never thought about tinder working against us. Though I definitely think it has for me before. 

AP: I started using it right after I got out of a long, damaging relationship, dated around a bit and had fun and didn't have fun and then found someone who is also With Her (Ticket Girl). How do you feel it worked against you? 

MM: Oh no, you're turning the table!

AP: Oops.

MM: Honestly, I can readily admit that I download tinder A. way too fast after a breakup and B. to get compliments from men. I just swipe and swipe and swipe.

AP: True, it's honestly the ultimate game. Total sensory overload in one sense but in another sense also total sensory deprivation.

MM: Oo yeah. For me it's complete escapism, and I only really responded to people who were treating it the same way. So no good. But — what inspired you to first start looking for something in particular? I.e. what do you think inspired you to really pursue finding someone?

AP: Honestly, I truly did download it way too fast after a breakup, like the same day hahaha. But I guess for me the breakup was more a final escape and the first time I felt any sort of emotional (and sexual, sadly) agency, so once I got out I wanted to start exploring that as quickly as possible. I really didn't know what I wanted until I started seeing people and seeing things I did like and things I didn't — but the truly WILD thing was, even when a person and I truly just were not a good fit, I saw what healthy romance and sex is SUPPOSED to look like and understood that I had previously had no idea what the bare minimum level of being treated like a human is. Which is pretty sad and dark! But was also really exciting, to get crushes or feel NO spark or make out with a woman in a bar or have someone listen to the album you recommended them.

So all of that, the good and the bad and the platonic and not platonic, was great, in retrospect. But then I met my current partner (lol) and realized that it could be way more than just the bare minimum, and could be something I really didn't think existed. Not just love (because somehow I've never doubted love's existence) but true understanding. 

MM: Damn. Thank you for sharing that. Let's talk about those interactions — the dates. The million dollar question: What do you wear on a first date?

AP: Hell yeah now the JUICY BITS. So on a first date, I typically try to look hot (obviously) but also somehow represent myself to the other person in almost an experimental way. Like I try to put on something I myself would feel really awesome in, and if for whatever reason that's not their idea of hot, fuck them! That's my whole mentality anyway. 

My favorite first date outfit has been my black vintage T-shirt with two dragons dueling over a castle, knotted up to show a bit of not abs-abs, high-waisted black jersey peg pants (that feel like pajamas), chunky black platform boots, and whatever big weird earrings I bought on my most recent whim. If they don't like the dragon shirt, they ain't shit.

MM: Black jersey peg pants? What are peg pants?

AP: It's actually these very particular pants from ASOS.

MM: WOW these are the pants of dreams.

AP: SO comfortable, SO flattering — basically have the look of something Audrey Hepburn would wear but way more accessible and comfy.

MM: The pockets! The high rise! The cropped cut! I get it. 

AP: SO GOOD right???

MM: Do you think you also factor in what the person you're going on a date with will find hot? Do you take into account their age, gender, all that? 

AP: Oh, totally. Honestly most especially with other women, but people of all genders for sure. I think when I go to pick something out I kind of picture what I know about them (however little) and what their sensibility might be when it comes to style and aesthetics and ~hotness~. I also think the more I have felt unsure about someone or the way things are going, the harder I try to almost make up for it.

MM: Completely agree. Dating women ups the ante.

AP: It totally does! And then I think about her and wonder if she's doing the same thing.

MM: Do you wear perfume or makeup on a first date, too? (Also yes... I mean if we're all thinking it then SHE has to be thinking it, too. Right?)

AP: Yes! I wear whatever my signature scent is — I say this because I always have one, but it evolves every so often. My favorite one for over a year now has been from & Other Stories. Makeup wise, I just try to look like what I would look like on the hotter end of the everyday spectrum. Basically meaning... the addition of foundation and multiple shades of eyeshadow. It's taken me a long time to get to this point, but I've become kind of obstinate in that only I am allowed to be mean and critical to me. I can be as mean to myself as I want but either you like what you see or you don't! (Please like me.) 

MM: And that's reflected in your makeup, you think? More so than the clothing? Drop the & Other Stories fragrance name!! 

AP: Okay so it was Fig Fiction, which was such an amazing beautiful warm awesome scent! They discontinued it though (the last time I found it I bought three bottles). Now I use Sicilian Sunrise, which is pretty similar! 

I think yes, more reflected in makeup. Simply because I am almost always going to dress in a way that makes me happy (if I've done laundry recently) but I'm not always going to put on makeup, so the makeup should just be closer to what you're gonna see all the time.

MM: Ok, so then the makeup is on. And the T-shirt and peg pants are on. Is it always the chunky black platform boots? Why? Because that's a constant power move IMO.

AP: The chunky black platform boots are truly ideal for many reasons: They're cute, they're sturdy, they subtly make me three inches taller (I need every inch), they'll hold up in rain or snow, and they'll allow me to do some damage to your face if you turn out to be a creep. And (drumroll) I got them on Poshmark for $10.

MM: No!! Do you know the brand?

AP: You're not gonna believe this but H&M. I do not shop at H&M for many reasons and would NEVER buy shoes from there but I took a shot on these because they were secondhand and they've held up impressively well. Almost everything I own was thrifted for financial and sustainability reasons, but these are truly a marvel.

MM: What does that word mean to you, specifically? Sustainability.

AP: Honestly I do not feel qualified to talk about sustainability at all! But to me, it's complicated. I grew up in a lower-class, financially insecure family while most of my friends were wealthy, so my family would either buy clothes secondhand or from a discount store. As a kid, this was really embarrassing to me to not have a closet full of Limited Too or Abercrombie, which obviously feels silly now. I'm still working class and financially insecure, so it's very difficult for me to buy from stores or brands that (at least claim) to ethically produce clothes because they're generally really, really expensive. That's the case for most of this country, including many people who are way worse off than I am. Thrifting is good for me because it allows me to get clothes when I need them at a low cost while also reducing environmental impact, but I don't think it's reasonable to make a judgement call on what any one person "should" be doing in the name of sustainability. Any one person can do whatever is comfortable to them, we can all try within our means! But at the end of the day, the real damage (and real opportunity for impact) is coming from big corporations and the government's actions. I don't think you can truly think about whatever sustainability means if you're getting mad at someone for shopping from a retail chain because it's all they can afford. Okay that was a lot and I have no idea where I was even going with that, sorry! I feel in many ways not educated enough to have feelings about this.

MM: Don't apologize! There's no set definition for the word, it's unique to all of us. And the Limited Too envy was real. 

AP: Omg especially when they had the matching outfits for you and your Build-A-Bear... I wanted it so badly. BIG topic.

MM: I can't believe it's been an hour!! I'll wrap this up so you can get back to your sorbet.

AP: Omg it has, wow!!

MM: Final q: Did your last first date go well?

AP: My last first date ended with plans to watch the Star Wars Holiday Special together. This year we're going to watch the Star Wars Holiday Special together in our new apartment. I'd say it went okay!

MM: AWW. On that exceedingly wholesome note — thank you for chatting!

AP: Of course! My pleasure! 

[stimmyvillainarchive]

WHY does the android app gotta suck so much, when i click the faq link it just like refreshes the page,,,, this happens with all links in bios on the andoird app :[

NNNN lovin this broke ass app.

I’mma go ahead and paste the FAQ just under the cut, hopefully you should be able to read it now :’))

(FAQ is written by Mod Joker)

“Are requests open?”

We get this ask a lot. And while I don’t mind answering, it does get a lilll annoying sometimes since we’re essentially repeating ourselves constantly. Before you ask, please check our ask box! It will ALWAYS give our request status!

From now on if we receive requests when they’re closed, we’re going to delete the message entirely. You’re free to ask again when they’re open, but we need breaks!

“Can allistic/neurotypical people follow?”

Yes! So long as you’re respectful of stimming and understand it’s not an aesthetic or something to make fun of.

“It says there’s two mods, but I only really see Mod Joker post.”

There is! But Mod Boo is rather, well, shy. We both are, tbh. I’ve just gotten used to talking a lot on this blog. And to tell ya the truth I invited her to mod this with me because she considered making a blog but wasn’t sure how she’d do it, and was worried she’d be too awkward/quiet. But she actually tends to see your messages a lot! She just tends to let me handle things. But if you ever wanna talk to her, just say the message is specifically for her and I’m sure she’ll get back to you. She’s very friendly and tbh one of the best people to talk to!!

“How do you make gifs?”

I use the same method stimmybby uses! His tutorial’s right here!

“How do you make banners?”

I use photoshop and for backgrounds (depending on what type of background), I use paint tool SAI. I made a tutorial on how I do it here!

“Can we use your banners for posts that aren’t stim related?”

Absolutely! So long as credit is given and you’re not in our dni, then use it as you like! Discourse posts, art, vent posts, promo posts, whatever floats your boat!

“Can I use your gif/s?”

As long as there’s credit to us for the gif/s and you don’t apply to our dni, you’re free to!

“How can I credit you?”

There’s a few ways! Such as

- Including the credit in the post and/or under the cut (this is the best way people can access the original post and see the credit!

- Include the credit in the post’s captions

- Include the credit in the tags

- Include a link in the post to another post that has the credits in it

- Saying you got the gif/s from us in the post

“What are bad/wrong ways to ”“credit”“ you?”

- Saying “I don’t own these gifs”

- Saying “credit to the original owner(s)/gifmaker(s)

- Straight up not saying you took these gifs from people/including in no credits

- Claiming the gif/s are yours/you made them

If I see any of these I WILL publicly call you out on it and you WILL be blocked immediately thereafter. That block will not be lifted.

“What does REG mean?”

Reactionary Exclusionary Gatekeeper. Meaning people who try to exclude certain queer people from queer spaces. Such a biphobes, transphobes, aphobes, panphobes, and so on.

“What does TERF mean?”

Trans/Transgender Exclusionary Radical Feminist. Meaning radfems who are transphobic and are violent towards trans people (especially trans women).

“What does SWERF mean?”

Sex Worker Exclusionary Radical Feminist. They’re radfems who try to exclude sex worker from their feminism and often treat women attracted to men as less worthy.

“What’s the ADT community?”

ADT stands for “Actually Dysphoric Trans/Transgender” and was created by transmedicalists/truscum to break off from the trans community. It’s an insult to the trans community, an insult to the creator of the transgender pride flag (it’s removed the white that was there for people who ID as non-binary/outside the gender binary), and is there purely to start drama and create rifts in a community that’s already got enough enemies for simply existing in a transphobic world

“He/Him lesbians don’t exist/they’re transphobic towards trans men”

As a trans man who doesn’t think the world revolves around me and who understands that what lesbians decide to do it literally none of my goddamn business: get the fuck over yourself you whiny pissbaby

“What do you mean by people in the true crime community?”

People who sexualize, romanticize, excuse, and/or support serial killers and their actions/crimes. This doesn’t include people who are INTERESTED in the topic of crimes, serial killers, etc but acknowledging how these people are disgusting and their actions are unforgivable.

“Why are you anti-cgl?”

Cause we hate pedophiles and are decent human beings.

“You’re bigoted to kinksters just like homophobes are bigoted to gay people!”

I hate to break it to ya bud but I’m proudly kinkphobic and you’re a giant homophobe!!

“I’m a SFW cgl(re)/littlespace blog so I’m following/interacting uwu”

No the fuck you aren’t!! You’re a kink blog, there’s no such thing as a “sfw kink” even if you’re remaining two braincells are too busy fighting over the last pacifier to tell you some fuckin common sense. Your ass is getting blocked and I’ll also be using your blog to take a look at the people you interact and block them too just for safe measure! Eat a cactus, fuck nugget

“You hate lesbians if you hate TERFs”

You owe every lesbian an apology for assuming they’re all mysogynistic, LGBT+phobic pieces of horseshit like you are. Eat a dick.

“aces/aros aren’t LGBT uwu”

Wow… that’s so wrong Alexa play Fuck You by Lily Allen

“Me/Someone I know/(insert user/s) has been blocked. Why?”

There can be a number of reasons why you’re blocked, and I’m not afraid to block people as I want this place comfortable and safe for the mods and followers. So there’s several reasons as to why.

- You apply to our DNI (see BYF)

- You’re a (insert harmless children’s cartoon) critical blog (I tend to block those due to them saying LGBT+phobic things)

- You get into kin drama

- You’re an ace discourse, pan discourse, bi discourse, and/or overall REG discourse blog (this does not mean I block inherently block discourse blogs! I block the shitty ones)

- You’re a spam/porn/etc bot (if I’ve gotten this wrong, lemme know! I tend to block shady and empty blogs for this reason unless their desc/url/etc says it’s empty/weird for a reason)

- You’re a blog that frequently posts/centers around one or more of my triggers

- You’re an aesthetic blog (though I tend to soft block for them. But this is NOT an aesthetic blog and stimmy is NOT an aesthetic)

- You’re an “anyone can interact” stim blog

- You’re a stim blog that steals/doesn’t credit the gifs they use

- I feel you and I are going to argue and I’m just saving us the trouble of future unpleasant encounter/s

- You’ve been shitty to my friends or just been shitty to people in general and I’ve noticed it

HOWEVER I’ve made slip ups in the past! If you feel you don’t apply to any of these, you can contact me through my main and ask why. Sometimes I don’t always remember why I blocked somebody (sadly there’s a lot of shitheads on this site I’ve needed to block) or I’ve confused one blog for another person’s blog. Or maybe the person was more chill than I thought. Please contact me yourself rather than ask somebody else to do it though so I can get all the details! Even if I don’t lift the block, I won’t report you for block evading or anything.

“You used to be kidheart friendly and now you’re not, why’s that?”

Sadly, Raven (the creator of Kidhearts) has proven to be a bully sympathizer and feels it’s okay to compare agere to kinks/cgl and sides with regressionuncensored. She condones bullying/harassment/the sexualization of minors and I am not nor will ever be okay with that.

“But Raven sai-”

I don’t care what she says. She made it abundantly clear that she supports regressionuncensored and I don’t care that it came back to bite her in the ass. Bullies deserve no support, no sympathy, no nothing. And if you side with her than don’t come near this blog. This is agere safe and I will not allow people who support sexualizing it to interact. Kidhearts WILL be blocked on the spot, no questions asked.

“I’ve left a community on the dni list, can I follow/interact?”

Yes!

“Why are you anti-(insert thing on blacklist here)?”

Camp Camp: It’s racist + antisemitic

Dragon Maid: It’s pedophilic

Killing Stalking: It’s homophobic, ableist, sexist, perpetuates rape culture, and fetishizes abuse

Your Lie in April: It romanticizes child abuse and it literally starts off with a gross pedo joke when we meet the love interest in episode one

Split: It’s ableist

Hetalia: It’s antisemitic

Harry Potter/J.K. Rowling’s works: Actually there’s nothing inherently bad about the story. I just don’t like it. HOWEVER: I can’t stand J.K. Rowling as she’s a TERF/overall LGBT+phobe, and racist. So none of her creations will be featured here.

Sonic Boom: Nothing inherently problematic. I just can’t stand the show because it just fuckin sucks

13 Reasons Why: It romanticizes suicide and the creators refused to listen to actual mental health experts and have made the show potentially dangerous to anyone who even slightly deals with suicidal thoughts/urges

Detroit Become Human: It’s racist + antisemitic

Voltron: Legendary Defender: It queerbaits/it’s LGBT+phobic

“REG is a transphobic term”

I, Mod Joker, am trans. Try again.

“A-specs aren’t LG-”

*buzzer sound* wrong. So sad for you

“You’re not LGBT+ because you DARED disagree with me because you actually acknowledged that tumblr didn’t credit the community sweaty uwu”

We get this shit because a lot of you assume I’m ace or at the very least a-spec. And… Ya couldn’t be far from it. I’m a pan, genderfluid trans man. Even with all your gatekeeper (sorry, BULLSHIT) logic; I’d still be attracted to multiple genders and not be cis. I’m p queer. So no matter which way you slice it, I’m part of LGBT+. Die mad about it.

“You’re comparing aphobes to TERFs and SWERFs you fucking transphobe!”

Wow I didn’t realize setting boundaries meant that I viewed y'all in the EXACT same light. I’m so glad I have the lovely aphobes that have told my friends that they should kill themselves to set me straight.

Asking people not to interact doesn’t inherently mean I think they’re the EXACT same thing.

“Mod Joker is a gif-thief and reposts people’s content without properly crediting them!”

I have made this entire post explaining that’s wrong. Idrc if the post is too lengthy for you. Don’t talk shit if you don’t even have all the details.

Additionally, if you send me somethin about this in a negative light I’m IP blocking you. One strike and you’re out. If you want to believe people with false info and false accusations then that’s your baggage. Not mine.

HOWEVER if I’ve accidentally mis-credited, forgot to/messed up on crediting a person for their gif/video, or so on let me know! I’ll make mistakes, but I never do it intentionally.