#writevswrong

[writevswrong]

Lithium Update :)

UPDATE:

I’m writing a book. 😳

A big book. So massive it’s turning into a series. Whaaa? Yes. I said it. Ya girl done typed it. 😳😳

My editor says book one is due by the end of September and I want to cry. 😳😳😳

Release date still to come! Same with the cover reveal and giveaways. 😊😊

GIVEAWAYS?!

A few of the giveaways include signed books! See below for just SOME of the books that are included. 😍💖

Children of Blood and Bone by Toni Adeyemi

A Reaper at the Gates by Sabaa Tahir

The Cruel Prince by Holly Black

Iron Gold by Pierce Brown

Things are happening. All is good. I can’t wait to share it with all you lovely people! 

[thebluemartini]

A Monolith Between Them - Part IV {Nessian}

TITLE: A Monolith Between Them

PREVIOUS PARTS: Part I, Part II, Part III

FIC LENGTH: 4 Parts

FIC SYNOPSIS: Post-ACOFAS. After living in the Illyrian Mountains for six months, Nesta decides she wants to perform the Blood Rite. Cassian isn’t too pleased.

*This fic is also posted on AO3 and FF.

TAGGING: @my-fan-side @aelinashgalathynius @acotar-feels @city-of-fae @mindnumbmikey @eclectichollow @strangeenemy @saltierthanthebottomofapretzelbag @fucking-winchester-trash @themoonunderstoodmynightmares @archeron-queen @jadeajibola @endlessworld246 @wolffrising @writevswrong @saltydreamcollector @highladyofidris @allthestarswecansee @tiredbutstillreading @fandoms-everywhere-united

A/N: Hooray! It's the final part...and oh my stars, this final chapter was a total beast to write and edit! It's so long, haha. I feel like I'm not so great at writing more action-y scenes, which is why I was nervous about writing about the Rite in the first place. Hopefully it came out okay! And I hope you enjoy this final chapter :) It’s a doozy!

Also someone letting me know if the tagging actually worked this week?? :)

Part IV - Together

Day Seven of the Blood Rite:

By some miracle, she had made it to Ramiel.

For the past two days, she did not stop despite the fact that her body begged and begged her to. Her empty stomach made it difficult for her to find the energy to go on. The wound in her thigh and the bruises and scrapes on her arms grew more tender and raw as they rubbed against her leather clothing and the stone of the monolith. Her hands kept cramping. Her eyes demanded to be shut. The cold air that blew around her sent shivers through her entire body. That dark voice within her still repeated “You’re weak” over and over in her mind.

However, Nesta remained strong and tenacious.

She still had no idea how much time she had left to reach the top of Ramiel...or if she even had any time left.

Ascending Ramiel was the toughest part yet, as its incline was nearly completely vertical. She had been forced to constantly grab hold of the jagged rocks jutting from it to stay on the enormous stone. So many times, her feet nearly slid out from under her, or her hands nearly lost their grip. Being without water for many hours left her lips chapped and her mouth dry.

She was nearing the top of one side of the monolith. Once she reached it, she would still have to hobble or crawl up the slope to reach the summit and the black stone that she needed to touch to complete the Rite.

Once the top of the monolith was within her reach, she stretched out her arms to grab hold of the edge. Summoning all her remaining strength, she pulled herself up, using her feet to help push herself upward. She managed to get her upper body on the flat surface, where she found a large stone blanketed by snow to grab hold of and help yank the rest of her body up.

Laying on her back upon the snowy ground, Nesta momentarily closed her eyes and panted from the exertion of her climb. It felt like it took an eternity to get that far, and she still had a bit more to go.

Suddenly, the sun that she felt shining upon her eyelids seemed to suddenly go away.

Nesta’s eyes shot open to find a tan-skinned Illyrian male standing before her, eyeing her with a look of disdain. “I’m certainly not going to let Cassian’s whore complete the Rite,” he grumbled and moved his foot to kick her.

Before his foot made contact with her stomach, Nesta turned on her side and tightly grabbed the large stone nearby to hang on. At the impact of his foot, Nesta let out a long wail as the force sent her legs to hang off the edge. Fury raged through her as the male kept kicking at her, trying to knock her off the monolith.

She forced her eyes to stay open as she attempted to analyze his movements. When he wasn’t expecting it and his foot came toward her, she seized his foot instead. The sudden weight upon his foot when he tried to pull it back sent him tumbling to the ground on his back.

Nesta tugged on his leg to help bring her whole body back up on the cliff. She scrambled to stand up and limped away from the monolith’s edge. Her thigh wound felt like it was completely inflamed.

“You bitch,” the male, having recovered from his fall, said as charged toward her and tackled her to the ground from behind. Nesta squirmed face-down beneath him as he moved his hands around her neck in an attempt to suffocate her.

But Nesta was quick to jerk her head back, knocking it roughly into his chin and causing him to release her. She then placed her palms against the ground and popped her upper body up, causing him to slide off her back.

However, now he was on top of her legs, still pinning her to the ground. Nesta tried to kick him, but the weight of him anchored her down and her legs were too weak. He stretched out his arm and picked up a nearby rock and pounded it repeatedly against her booted feet.

As she screamed, Nesta twisted her upper body so she could start whacking at him with her hand, but her hits seemed to have no effect on him at all. There was no strength in her slaps.

He ended up tossing away the rock and grabbing one of her hands when it came at him, tugging it toward himself as he stood up. Nesta quickly turned her body over so she was on her back. But the male came around to where her head was and kneeled one leg down on the ground. He pulled her arm out across his thigh and pushed down on it until a loud pop from her elbow joint was heard. A cry of anguish escaped her lips as the pain surged within her arm.

Dropping her injured arm, he moved to the other side of her, preparing to repeat his previous action on her other limb. Nesta kept her arm against herself and refused to let it be pulled away from her. But it looked like another idea appeared in the Illyrian’s mind, and he decided to head toward her feet instead. When he leaned down to grab them, Nesta kneed his chin, sending him stumbling back. In a quick motion, Nesta unsteadily rose off the ground and onto her now battered feet, ignoring the pain she felt.

He came charging after her once more, looking like he was determined to dive for her legs and hoist her off the ground. Sticking out her good arm against his shoulder, she halted him and curled her arm around his neck. With her arm wrapped around him, she fell back onto the ground, taking him with her. Then, she lifted her knee to smash it into his groin, causing him to let out a muffled yelp. She kneed him between the legs once more with such force that she flipped him over her body. A cracking sound was heard when he collided with the ground upon his back.

He lied there groaning, with his eyes tightly shut. But he did not move. In fact, it looked like he was unable to move.

Nesta tried to catch her breath and steady her racing heart. She gingerly rolled up the sleeve of her injured arm, then scooped up some snow from the ground beside her to hold it against her elbow joint. She grimaced as she did so, but she hoped the coolness of the snow would at least help reduce the swelling.

Looking up, she noticed the sun was setting…

Who knew if this was her final night to make it to the black stone? If this Illyrian male was on the monolith too, it must have been close to the end of the week of the Rite...

With a grunt, she turned her body over so she was now on her knees. The pain within her thigh was still there from the impaled stick, but not as strong as the pain that was throbbing through her arm and her aching feet.

But she couldn’t think about the pain. She had to keep moving. Putting the pressure on her knees and the palm of her unharmed arm, she crawled using three of her limbs.

It was the final day of the Rite, and Cassian was utterly restless.

There was an ache within him that no beverage or tonic could soothe. His anxiety could not be eased, and the frustration and regret he felt toward himself for the past mistakes he’d made with Nesta were at an ultimate high.

He certainly didn’t have any time for the taunts that were thrown his way that day either. As soon as he rose and dressed for the day, he stormed out of his cabin and headed toward the heart of the camp. Along the way, a few Illyrian males cackled and heckled him by asking where the “witch” or his “whore” was, implying that there was no way Nesta would survive. Each of those Illyrians were promptly punched in the jaw and knocked down into the snow.

Once he reached the center of the camp, Cassian paced around the unlit firepit with his fists clenched at his sides.

When he, Azriel, and Rhys had completed the Rite, their touch upon the black stone had immediately transported them back to the middle of their camp. The same would happen for Nesta if she made it.

The aches he felt throughout his body grew stronger. While clutching his stomach, Cassian plopped himself on the snowy ground beside the pit. He sat cross-legged as he prayed to the gods that Nesta was safe and would complete the Rite.

With his eyes constantly scanning the area around him, Cassian waited.

And hoped.

Nesta continued to crawl up the steep incline to the summit of Ramiel. The sky was getting darker and darker.

Her bones kept pleading for her to stop and give up, especially with her body constantly losing its balance and her clumsily trying to hang on. With all her willpower, she resisted that urge by thinking of Cassian’s words.

“Come back to me. Please.”

“Continue fighting and surviving as you always do.”

“Keep going, sweetheart.”

Fortunately, the black stone was in sight. Not a single snowflake had fallen upon it as if its mystical power was shielding it. It had the shimmer of a black diamond, and it served as her beacon.  

She needed to hang on a little bit longer…

But as soon as she passed through a row of pine trees, a gust of freezing wind blew past her that made her look down and tighten her grip on the ground beneath her. She could sense magic thrumming around her and calling to her. It seemed to pull at the magic within her from the Cauldron that had lied dormant for over a year now.

The sky suddenly turned black, causing Nesta to freeze. The wind continued to howl around her, and suddenly a young woman materialized before her.

When the woman lifted her head, Nesta recognized her face…

“Feyre?” Nesta questioned weakly in disbelief.

“I don’t know why I take pity on you. You don’t deserve it. You let me and Elain nearly starve to death, while you sat and did nothing,” she spoke with such contempt.

Elain appeared beside Feyre and nodded along to Feyre’s words. She gave Nesta a scornful look...It didn’t look right to see such a facial expression upon her face.

“And you let me die,” a male’s voice said. Nesta whipped her head to her left, where she saw her father. “How could you do nothing when the king captured me? What kind of daughter are you?”

“You will never be one of us,” Rhys stated as he appeared beside Feyre, along with Azriel, Mor, and Amren behind him.

Nesta couldn’t stop the tears that formed in her eyes and streamed down her cheeks.

She wished she could say these words and scenes were unfamiliar to her...but she had seen all of this and heard all of these words in her nightmares since the war. 

Her nightmares, fears, and insecurities had all come to life before her.

This isn’t real. This isn’t real, she repeated to herself in her head as she closed her eyes, trying to shut them out.

But when she heard the sound of Cassian’s voice, she felt compelled to open up her teary eyes and look behind her to see him.

“How could someone love a selfish and rotten person like you? You’re worthless. I’m only forced to love you because we’re mates.”

Seeing him stand before her and saying these things - even though she knew this was all contrived - still wounded her.

“That’s...not true,” Nesta weakly spoke aloud and shook her head up at him. Sliding her hand within her pocket, she felt around for the letter the real Cassian had given her. When her fingertips found the parchment, Nesta closed her eyes tightly and relished in the memory of what his letter had said.

These past several months, you have been irritating, infuriating, and ridiculous...as well as inspiring, enthralling, and intoxicating.

I am in love with you, Nesta Archeron.

I’ll be waiting for you, ready to not waste anymore time.

Her eyes shot open, and she sought out the black stone. In the darkness, she could no longer see it, but she knew the direction she had to go. With newfound vigor, she rushed forward on her hand and knees.

But as she did so, all the figures around her vanished, except for Cassian.

Now Cassian was flying, when a blast of light powered through the air and hit him square in the chest, sending him to the ground right in front of her. Nesta stopped and stared at him as life left his eyes.

Another nightmare had come to life. But the tears didn’t stop flowing from Nesta’s eyes. Seeing him die before her was a dagger to her chest. All this time, she had feared having these feelings for him because of how that love could make her suffer...but she couldn’t deny it anymore. She couldn’t shield herself any longer.

She couldn’t resist placing her hand against the fake Cassian’s cheek. She half-thought her hand would go through him as if he were some kind of phantom. But he was solid beneath her palm. She could even feel the stubble on his cheek.

This isn’t real. This isn’t real. Keep going.

Suppressing a shudder from what she just witnessed, she continued her crawl toward the black rock. The figures of her sisters, her father, and the Inner Circle all appeared once more, calling after her and yelling at her.

She shut them out and weakly continued her journey, hurting her knees and hand when she roved over jagged rocks in the darkness.

When the front half of her body collapsed to the ground after her arm suddenly gave out from under her, it was then that she could make out that the black rock was a short distance before her. Her body shuddered as she let out a sigh of relief.

But when she tried to move forward, she felt a hand grab hold of her boot, causing her to wince. She turned behind her and saw Cassian was there.

“Why are you leaving me, Nesta? Why are abandoning me and shutting me out like you did after the war?” he demanded to know.

Nesta just carefully shook her head. “I’m not,” she said softly. “I’m not.”

She grimaced when she tried to yank her foot out of his grip, but the apparition wouldn’t let go. She outstretched her uninjured arm as far as she could and lunged for the black rock.

But she couldn’t reach it.

She was so close…

Breathing heavily as the tears cascaded down her cheeks, she thought of all she had endured the past several days. The cold. The stick impaled in her thigh. The hazardous climb. Her broken arm. Her bruised feet. Even her own mind and magic had betrayed her.

This couldn’t all be for nothing.

She wouldn’t let it be all for nothing.

She focused on imagining what could be, if she made it back.

What it would be like to see Cassian again... to tease him as she loved to do...and to also feel him against her.  

She wanted more time in this life. Not just to be with Cassian, but to actually live and enjoy life.

“Why are you leaving me, Nesta?” the apparition of Cassian whined.

“I’m not,” Nesta firmly replied. “I’m coming home to you.” 

Once more, she threw out her arm so far that it was taut and she felt the strain within her muscles. Her fingertips grazed the edge of the stone.

Everything around her faded away in an instant.  

The sun had set over an hour ago...meaning Nesta only had a few hours left to complete the Rite.

Cassian hadn’t left his spot beside the pit. Despite the fact that his body had begun to shiver after the sun descended and the cool winds blew through, he did not budge.

The aches within him grew stronger and in the past hour or so, those aches seemed to move to his head. If he and Nesta were mates as he had suspected...Nesta must have been suffering greatly.

He let out a long, slow breath. He closed his eyes and sent up another silent prayer that Nesta would return.

At the sound of a thump against the ground, Cassian suddenly opened his eyes. He lost his breath at the sight of Nesta appearing and lying in the snow before him. Her eyes were closed and one of her arms was stretched out. Her body was shivering, and her hair was disheveled, with most of the strands having fallen out of its hair ribbon, and her Illyrian leathers were all torn up. But one of her arms...something didn’t look right. And her thigh was covered with a bloodied handkerchief...the handkerchief he had given her.

Tears formed in his eyes as he rushed toward her. “Nesta,” he whispered as he gently ran his fingers through her hair.

Her eyes fluttered open and she looked up at him. Her breathing stilled when she saw him. “Are you really here?” she asked feebly.

Cassian smoothed her hair away from her face. “Yes,” he breathed. Then, without his eyes leaving hers,  he slid his hands beneath her body and scooped her up as he stood. Her face contorted with agony as he did so. He looked at her apologetically and realized he needed to get her to a healer immediately.

“What were your last words to me before the Rite? Before you said goodbye?” she asked seriously as she lifted her hand to his cheek.

“‘Come back to me please,’” he answered softly as he recalled that heart wrenching conversation that replayed in his head multiple times the past few days. “And now you have, but I need to get you -” he began to mutter, but was interrupted by Nesta lifting her head and crashing her lips against his.

He was caught off guard, but once he got over his astonishment, Cassian responded to her delicate kiss. Despite loving the taste of her, he knew they did not have time for this right now. He needed to get her injuries taken care of first. He pulled away and leaned his forehead against hers. “Why do we only kiss when one of us is dying?” he wondered huskily. “We need to get you to a healer.” 

“I don’t want to waste anymore time,” Nesta said honestly while she ran her hand across his jawline before bringing it down to his chest.

“If we don’t get you to a healer soon, you won’t have much time left.”

Flying would’ve been the fastest way to get back to his cabin. But she didn’t enjoy flying, and it would just make her sicker. Plus, he risked jostling her and injuring her more if he flew. Speed walking back would just have to do.

Nesta closed her eyes as she leaned her head against his upper arm, while her hand now gripped onto to the center of his shirt.

“Hold on, Nes. Stay with me,” he said to her, and she nodded.

Cassian began to stride through the camp in the direction of his cabin as he carefully held onto Nesta.

“Now I definitely know something is wrong. I just called you ‘Nes’ and you didn’t bite my head off,” he joked in an attempt to lighten the mood.

She looked pale and kept her eyes closed, but when he briefly looked down, she was smiling.

As they passed a few of the other camp’s cabins en route, the door to one of them suddenly burst open and an Illyrian female ran out. In the light of the camp’s outdoor torches, Cassian realized it was Morwenna, a female he had been training and one he believed Nesta had befriended. She charged toward them, her long dark hair flying around behind her.

“She’s back!” Morwenna exclaimed as she came to Cassian’s side, keeping pace with him. A look of shock and awe was upon her face.

“Yes, but she needs medical attention immediately,” Cassian stated seriously as he continued to plow forward. At Cassian’s reply, Morwenna’s facial expression quickly transformed into one that was solemn. “Morwenna, could you please go find one of the healers and send her to my cabin?”

“Yes, of course,” she replied with a firm nod before darting off in another direction.

Nesta groaned as he strolled through the snow and walked up a small, steep incline. The sound propelled Cassian to move faster. Within the next few minutes, they had finally reached his cabin.

As soon as he entered, he headed straight for his bedroom. Gently laying her down on one side of the bed, he pulled down the blankets on the opposite side. Then he picked her up again to lay her down on the uncovered sheets and brought the blankets up over her body. Nesta opened up her eyes as her head hit the pillow. “Cassian, I need...water,” she requested quietly.

 “Yes, sweetheart,” he called out to her as he rushed out of the room. Very slowly, Nesta sat up and was about to attempt propping up her pillow when Cassian returned holding one tall glass of water and a bowl of beef broth. He quickly handed the glass to her in her good arm and placed the bowl on the stand beside the bed. “Stop trying to move. Let me do that,” he said as he reached behind her to prop her pillow against her headboard.

After a long sip of water, Nesta swallowed. “I thought I told you I don’t take orders from anyone,” she said softly as she leaned back against the headboard and grinned slyly up at him. She took another swig of water.

“And here I thought, considering your state, you would indulge me only for today,” Cassian said as he laid the back of his hand against her forehead. She was burning up. Cassian internally pleaded that Morwenna would be able to quickly find one of the healers.

Nesta gulped. “Never,” she stated, the small grin still on her face.

“Well in between sips, could you please tell me what happened to you?” Cassian requested as he looked at her arm that was out of place.

“I think one of the males broke my arm,” she replied. “Another male impaled a stick through my thigh.”

“What?” Cassian’s eyes widened. Then he carefully pulled the covers off of her and looked back down at the bloodied handkerchief wrapped around her thigh. Very gingerly, he untied it. Seeing the piece of stick that was still lodged within her thigh, he fought to keep his rage under control. The wound looked to be completely infected.

“Forgive me, sweetheart, for being so forward, but may I remove your clothes?” Cassian asked, covering up his concern with his casual bantering. He needed to get her out of her dirty clothes and prepare for the healer to look her over.

After pulling the glass away from her mouth, she nodded. “Usually, you’re so barbaric, I’m shocked you even bothered to ask,” she said sleepily as she rested her head back.

Cassian walked over to the chest at the foot of his bed and opened it, pulling out one of his shirts and tossing it on the bed near Nesta’s feet. “Well, once you’re all healed, I’ll be barbaric and we can reenact a scene from that smutty The Barbarian and the Maiden novel you read,” he said with a mischievous smile.

Nesta nearly choked on her water, causing Cassian to immediately rush to her side out of alarm. Gods forbid he kill her with his sexual innuendos after she survived the Blood Rite...

But she recovered quickly, and her eyes narrowed on him while her lips threatened to break out into a devious grin. “You’ve been reading my books?”

His eyes gleamed when he looked back down at her body to try to figure out the least painful way to get her clothes off of her. “One or two,” he replied casually, but then had to pause their playful conversation and return to the task at hand. “I’m sorry if this hurts,” he stated unhappily, and Nesta nodded in acceptance as she sat her now empty glass down on the nightstand.

When she closed her eyes, Cassian slid his fingers beneath the waistband of her pants and slowly pulled them down past her thighs. Nesta only winced a little when her pants peeled away from her wounded thigh. The wound was all red and had some white spots around the stick that could’ve been puss. Streaks of blood covered her thigh.

“When I’ve fantasized about bringing you to my bed and ripping off your clothes, this isn’t exactly what I had pictured,” Cassian commented with a glint in his eyes to distract her as he continued to pull her pants off of her legs and feet.

A slight blush came across Nesta’s cheeks, but she didn’t open her eyes. He tossed her pants to the floor, then stood beside her again. “I’m going to untie your top,” he informed her, and she leaned her upper body forward to grant Cassian access to her back.

“I never thought such fantasies could become a reality,” she said softly as he began to untie the laces on the back of her Illyrian leather tunic. “I never thought you could ever truly want...me.”

 Cassian’s fingers faltered in their task, and it felt like his heart had been pierced. He took a deep breath before continuing to untangle the laces. “I’ve wanted you for a long time,” he said honestly.

Once he finally finished pulling out the laces, he pulled the ribbon out of her hair and pushed her hair to the side, over her shoulder. Leaning forward, he placed a light kiss on the back of her neck. He thought he saw a slight shiver go down her spine.

Then he went to the front of her body to carefully slide the leather sleeves of her shirt from her arms. A pained cry escaped her lips when it went over her dislocated arm. After he threw it to the ground, he grabbed the bottom edge of her black shirt that was beneath the leather tunic and gingerly lifted it up and over her head. She let out another pained moan when she outstretched her arms above her head.

All she was currently wearing now was a bra and underwear. Out of politeness, Cassian looked away from her body. He swiftly reached for his shirt that he had tossed on the bed and put it on her. It was large and loose and would probably go down to her knees if she stood up.

She leaned back against the pillows and stared up at him as he brought the blankets back over her body. He placed his hand against her cheek. It was the same spot where he had put his hand when he said goodbye to her before the Rite. And now to have her before him after the Rite...He could feel that she really was here. This wasn’t a dream. This time, he leaned forward and placed a kiss to her forehead.

“Cassian, I…” Nesta began to say feebly when he pulled away, but stopped when Morwenna and Leta, one of the Illyrian healers, burst into the room.

He would need to figure out what she wanted to say later. But for now, he was thankful the healer was finally here to take care of her. Cassian stepped away and let Leta look her over. The female pulled back the blankets to analyze her injuries. “Explain to me what happened,” Leta kindly ordered.

 Nesta recounted the skirmishes she endured the past week, and Cassian fought to keep his rage minimal as she spoke. He wished he could break the necks of those snotty males...or at least break something. But who knew if they even made it back...he didn’t know which he hoped for more: that they suffered and perished in the Rite, or that they survived only to return and have to deal with Cassian’s fury.

When Nesta concluded, Leta immediately ordered her to consume the beef broth on the nightstand as she dug through the medicine in her bag. Before Nesta could even attempt to grab the bowl with her good arm, Cassian beat her to it. He picked up the bowl and began feeding her spoonfuls of it.

As she ate, Leta added tonics to heal her and to knock her unconscious into the broth. Once she finished eating, Nesta stretched out her good arm toward Cassian. He put down the bowl and spoon on the nightstand and eagerly accepted her hand in his grasp. “Thank you,” she whispered drowsily.

“Goodnight, sweetheart,” Cassian answered. He brought their hands up to his face and kissed the back of her hand.

Nesta squeezed his hand as her eyes closed, and she instantly fell into a deep sleep. 

She wasn’t sure how many hours or how many days had passed, but she slipped in and out of consciousness.

Most of the time, Nesta was in a deep sleep. But every so often, she’d awake or be nudged awake by Cassian, who would be sitting beside her, ready and waiting with a bowl of broth to feed her containing tonics to help her heal and sleep.  As soon as she would finish, he’d hand her a glass of water to drink.

Too drowsy to speak and too preoccupied with eating and drinking whenever she awoke, words were not exchanged between her and Cassian during the short periods of time she was awake, save for his gentle orders for her to either eat and drink and his whispers of “Goodnight, sweetheart,” when she would slowly fall back asleep. Before she drifted off, she felt him kiss her temple each time.

Overall, her sleep had been dreamless...until one instance where she thought she had woken up on her own. She searched for Cassian, expecting him to be nearby and ready, as usual, to feed her.

But he wasn’t there...instead she found a letter addressed to her on the nightstand. Opening it up, she read through its contents:

Nesta,

I thought I loved you, but I think it was just the mating bond that messed with my brain and deceived me. I don’t love you. I don’t want anything to do with you.

Don’t expect to see me ever again.

-Cassian

The words sent tears streaming down her face, and she felt like she was suffocating.

Gasping for air, her eyes shot open and she found herself still in Cassian’s bed and no letter beside her. In the dim room, she reached her hand out to the side of her along the mattress, hoping to find Cassian beside her to reassure her that what just occurred was just a nightmare.

But her hand never found Cassian’s. She turned her head to find no one was beside her. Hyperventilating, she tried to push away her fears that Cassian really did run off and abandon her. Surely, he was just in the cabin somewhere...

But the nightmare had felt so real...Was the dream actually a premonition of what was to come?

Pushing away her covers, she got up off the bed without wincing.

Looking down, she realized she was still wearing Cassian’s shirt. Stretching out her arm, she found it no longer looked dislocated and didn’t ache. She also lifted up her leg to examine her thigh and saw that her wound was stitched up and healing.

She felt so...brand new. It was as if she had never physically suffered from the Blood Rite. There certainly were benefits to having a fae body….

Determined to find Cassian, she strolled out of his bedroom and headed down the hallway toward his study. Peeking her head around the door frame, she discovered he wasn’t there.

Ignoring her nerves, she went back down the hallway in the direction of the kitchen and the living room. But she still couldn’t find him.

Going to the front door, she turned the knob and opened it.

There, she found Cassian carrying a brown sack and about to take a step up to the small porch that led to his entryway. At the sound of the door creaking open, his head perked up. At first, he was beaming, but in a flash, that beam faded.

“You should be lying down,” he said seriously.

Nesta stepped back, pulling the door open with her to allow him entrance. “We’ve been over this before. You can’t order me around,” she said sternly.

Cassian stepped inside, and Nesta closed the door behind him. She turned around so her back was against the door, and Cassian approached her.

“Where were you?” she asked in a tone mixed with panic and irritation.

“I needed to go buy you some more food. We were nearly out of broth, and I think you’ll be ready to move onto more solid foods soon. Then I ended up flying to Velaris because I remembered there was that one tea you enjoy from one of the shops so I had gotten that too,” Cassian explained calmly as his eyes tried to search hers for...something. “I’m sorry. You’d been sleeping for over nine hours at a time the past few days. I didn’t expect you to be awake so soon. I shouldn’t have gone.”

He was out buying food for her, even going as far to find her favorite tea...to even further take care of her. All her life, she felt let down...especially by men. Her father abandoned her and her sisters, not even bothering to ensure they were nourished or caring that they lived. She thought Tomas Mandray would be the one to help take care of her...but that was all a facade. All he wanted to do was feed his own lustful desires.

After such experiences, she had previously sworn to herself that she would never trust a man again.

But then Cassian came into her life...and had been slowly breaking that resolve down.

Right now, she just needed to feel him and assure herself once more that all of this was real. She needed to truly know that he was before her and really taking care of her and not just part of her imagination. Abruptly, she tightly wrapped her arms around Cassian’s torso and closed her eyes as she laid her head against his chest. Cassian dropped the sack he was carrying to the ground, which made a small thump when it hit the floor. Some items in the bag spilled out and scattered on the floor, but he ignored it. He wrapped his arms around her in return.

“What’s wrong?” he whispered.

“Is that how you always respond when someone shows you affection?” she said, careful to not let any tears escape her eyes. Trying to hide her concern, she continued. “Are you so unused to it that you assume something must be wrong with someone to want to embrace you?”

“This is more of an I’m terrified yet so relieved to see you kind of a hug rather than a Cassian, you are the sun my world revolves around and I just want to worship you constantly hug.”

Nesta rolled her eyes. “I would never hug you like that.”

Cassian pulled back and gripped his hands on her upper arms as he stared her directly in the eyes. “What’s wrong?” he repeated.

Nesta paused, then shook her head. “Nothing.”

Cassian sighed out of frustration. “Is that how this is going to go?” he asked angrily. “You’re just going to shut me out again? If I have to go through that again...I won’t be able to take it. I don’t want you just at arm’s length, Nesta. I want all of you. The good and the bad. I don’t want to be just a meaningless fling for you.”

The old Nesta probably would’ve fired back at him, telling him it was none of his business to know everything and it was presumptuous of him to think she’d want him to be more than a fling. But now...Nesta’s heart raced beneath her chest. She didn’t want to lose him. She was screwing this up. She wanted him more than anything. She needed to be honest with him and fix this. After all she realized in the Blood Rite…

“You’re not!” she exclaimed.

“Then what am I to you?”

How could she even find the words to explain what he meant to her?

“You’re...everything to me,” she finally said. “And that scares me,” she added softly as tears began to form in her eyes. 

“Why?”

She hesitated, but finally decided to bring up her suspicion that they’d never spoken of. “What if these feelings are just because of...a possible mating bond between us? What if this is just one more thing in my life that I have no control over?”

When she mentioned the mating bond, Cassian seemed to go still for a moment, but then shook his head at her. “Remember what I told you? Mates don’t have to care about each other.  As far as I’m aware, Elain still doesn’t seem to have any kind of feelings for Lucien. Rhys and Feyre are an extraordinary case. Do you feel something more than a strong pull to me or more than a feeling of possessiveness? Then whatever you feel is real. It’s not something that’s been forced on you.”

“The thought of losing you...or of you betraying me or disappointing me...it leaves me feeling dead inside. I just don’t know what I’d do if any of that happened, and I couldn’t tell if I truly felt like I couldn’t live without you, or if it was because of some ridiculous bond between us,” Nesta shook her head as the tears continued to fall.

Cassian brought his hands to the sides of her face and started wiping away her tears with his thumbs. “For the week of the Rite, I couldn’t stop thinking about you and worrying about you. I missed you walking into my cabin unannounced and you rolling your eyes at me when I made some comment that you insisted was ridiculous. I missed your glares, your insults, and those rare times you’d give me a small smile. I missed you. I know, without a doubt, my feelings for you are real and are my own. They aren’t because of some possible bond.”

Her heart hammered within her chest. She remembered how it occurred to her during the Rite that she may never be able to tease Cassian again, never get to hear him make a silly sexual comment again, never feel the thundering of her heart when he called her “sweetheart,” and never get to just simply...talk to him.

She had missed him immensely. Even the week leading up to the Rite where they didn’t see each other...she missed him.

Was she relieved that her feelings were indeed her own? Her feelings for him were so overwhelmingly strong that it slightly frightened her.

She took a deep breath. “When I was on Ramiel...something in my magic called to the magic of the monolith. It brought to life all the nightmares I had had in the past year.”

Cassian’s eyes widened at this information.

“And those nightmares involved you saying I was unworthy of love, or you dying by that Cauldron’s blast of light...and they always left me feeling so broken. Then today, I dreamed I woke up, and you were gone for good, claiming your feelings for me were just because of the bond. So when you weren’t here when I really did wake up, I was terrified.”

Cassian continued to rub her face. “I’m so sorry. I know I’ve given you reasons to not trust me by failing to protect you and failing to keep some of my promises...but I’m determined to follow through with my promises now. I will not abandon you.”

Nesta nodded as she grabbed onto his forearms. “I know,” she whispered. “And I’m sorry for the way I’ve treated you and for shutting you out.”

“We both have things to work on,” Cassian replied honestly. “And we can work through them together.”

“Are you sure you want this? That you want me?” she couldn’t help but ask, still feeling skeptical that this was all real.

Cassian sighed. As he firmly held her face still, he looked deep into her eyes. “I’ve never wanted anything more. Don’t let your doubts consume you. They’ll drive you mad.”

“You’re ordering me around again,” she stated as she narrowed her eyes at him, but she failed to be truly stern with him. A smile spread across her face.

Cassian hesitantly smiled back. “But do you want this?” he asked seriously.

While it was indeed a risk to be with him and that she feared where this fierce love would lead her... Who knew how much time she would have left in this life? This life she had never wanted...until now.

Now she had a life where she no longer stood by and did nothing. Now she could actually help other females and train them, help them find a greater purpose that was bigger than themselves.

And now she had the chance to freely love someone without the worries of status and if a man could merely provide for her for the rest of her life. Now she was able to take care of herself, while also being truly loved for who she was.

“Yes,” she replied confidently.

The joy she saw on his face...It sent her heart racing, and she never wanted to see him without such joy again.

“Are you sure you want to risk being with an extraordinarily handsome male who sends your heart aflutter with every touch and will do anything to prove his love for you?”

Nesta rolled her eyes. “Against my better judgment, yes.”

Cassian grinned, then brought his face down closer to hers so his breath brushed against her lips and tickled her nose. “So you admit that I am extraordinarily handsome?”

“Will you just kiss me already?”

Cassian chuckled. “Maybe I should tease you just a bit longer to give you a taste of the painful waiting I had to endure while you did the Blood Rite.”

“Cassian,” she said sternly and leaned forward to kiss him herself, but he dodged his head away from her.

“Have I told you how proud I am of you, my sweet Illyrian warrior, for completing the Rite?”

“No, but you can tell me later and just reward me now,” she requested anxiously as she wrapped her hands around his neck and ran her fingers through his hair.

“I can’t wait to see Devlon’s face when he sees you. And when you start training the Illryian females...I don’t know if I’ll be able to control myself and keep my hands and lips off you,” Cassian rambled on.

“Well, there’s no need to control yourself right now,” Nesta remarked impatiently.

“How are you feeling?” he questioned her sincerely.

“Physically, I’m completely fine. Emotionally, however, I’m so frustrated, I could slap you.”

“Fine. I know how irresistable I am, so I’ll put you out of your misery.”

“How kind of you,” she said sarcastically and groaned at his pompousness, but she was interrupted by Cassian capturing her lips in a kiss, and that groan turned into a moan of pleasure.

The kiss was firmer and more passionate than the two kisses they’d previously shared since neither of them was dying this time. Cassian pushed her back against the door. With something behind her helping to support her, Cassian began to kiss her even more forcefully, as if nothing could satiate his appetite for her.

The passion and the force of his kisses nearly sent her knees buckling. Sensing her falter, Cassian ran his hand up along her thigh, sending an electrifying sensation through her body. His kisses didn’t stop as he lifted her thigh up, then wrapped both of his hands beneath her bottom and lifted her off the ground. His wings flared out behind him, and Nesta lifted both her legs to encircle them around his waist.

When he tried to pull away from her, she wouldn’t let him. Instead, she used her teeth to tug on his lower lip, eliciting a moan from him that sent a delighted thrill through her.

Eventually, Cassian managed to reluctantly pull his lips away from hers. Their faces were only an inch apart as they breathed heavily on each other. He tilted his head up at her, and Nesta rested her forehead against his.

“I love seeing you in my shirt,” he growled. “And I love you, Nesta Archeron.”

“I know,” she answered smugly. “I got your letter.”

“And what did you think of it?”

“It could’ve been written more neatly.”

This time, Cassian rolled his eyes at her.

“It was a bit long too. It nearly put me to sleep,” she added nonchalantly.

Cassian gave her a look to show he was unimpressed with her comments.

“And I don’t think I would’ve survived the Rite without it,” she finished seriously.

The amusement left Cassian’s face and was replaced with a tender expression.

“I meant what I said when I wouldn’t know what to do if you didn’t survive the Rite,” he told her. “The week of the Rite was unbearable...words cannot describe how it felt to see you return.”

Nesta rubbed the back of his neck. “I may have been ill, but I meant it when I said I didn’t want to waste anymore time either.”

“Then we’ll stop wasting it,” he said in a low voice before leaving a trail of kisses along her jawline.

“I love you, Cassian,” she mumbled before pulling his face so he was back to staring right at her. With a deep inhale of his woodsy scent, she fiercely kissed his beaming face.

The End

A/N: Man, writing this fic really took over my life. I'm a bit relieved it's over and will now probably take a break from writing Nessian :)

Thank you SO much to everyone who has read this/liked this/left comments/reblogged this! I hope you enjoyed this final part! I would love to get a comment from you and thank you personally! :)

When I first had this fic idea, I only wanted to write an angsty Nessian goodbye before the Rite and a cute reunion scene between them after Nesta survives the Rite...my how this mini fic evolved haha. I feel like the Rite is probably way more difficult than what I've described... I'm still learning how to write scenes that are action-y and aren't focused on romantic drama, haha. So that's really why I only focused on some days of the Rite for Nesta. :D

Anyway, thanks again! I hope you all have a fabulous day!

[fucking-winchester-trash]

I was tagged by @bluebellflames

rules: answer these 85 questions about yourself and then tag 20 people

last?

drink: fizzy lime water

phone call: boss

text message: boyfriend

song you listened to: At last by Etta James

time you cried: long time ago. I was probably pissed off at someone

ever?

dated someone twice: Yup.

kissed someone and regretted it: Honestly not real- wait yes. Two people

been cheated on: yup. A lot of people suck

lost someone special: Yes

gotten drunk and thrown up: bold of you to assume I can’t hold my alcohol

fave colors? Black. Dark red. The grey color of the ocean right before the sun breaks over the horizon

in the last year have you?

made new friends: yup. High schools pretty cool (plus tumblr)

fallen out of love: most definitely

laughed until you cried: very often

found out someone was talking about you: everyone talks shit

met someone who changed you: nope. And I’d like to dare anyone to try

found out who your friends are: Yes gotta weed out the fake ones

kissed someone on your facebook friends list: yup. My boyfriend

general

how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: Idek. Who actually uses face book anymore besides for messenger

do you have any pets: dog, 2 Guine (?) pigs, a lizard, and just rescued a kitten

do you want to change your name: nah mines okay ig

what did you do for your last birthday: chilled with my best friends and bf

what time did you wake up today: 7:55

what were you doing last night at midnight: i was actually asleep

what is something you can’t wait for: death, KoA the next time i getta hang with my bf (aka sleep at his house)

what are you listening to right now: my unending existential dread

have you ever talked to a person named tom: does a horse count?

something that gets on your nerves: existence

most visited website: tumblr, pinterest,

hair colour: blonde with a little red in it

long or short hair: looong

what do you like about yourself: sarcasm

want any piercings: another piercing in each ear

blood type: not a clue. I’ll ask the vampire(I’m stealing @bluebellflames answer because it’s great)

nicknames: my street name is Tea-Cup..?

relationship status: taken

zodiac sign: Loe bitches unite

pronouns: she/her

fave tv show: Lucifer, I- Zombie

tattoos: none. one day, however…

right or left handed: right

ever had surgery: yup

Piercings: lobes and cartilage

Sports: stairs. CrossFit counts i think

vacation: I’ve been to NYC and NOLA

Tag 20 people

@azrielsiphons @shesells136seashells @house-of-galathynius @librarian-of-velaris @mehlisssa @rhysanoodle @oneday-wewillberemembered @howtotameyourillyrian @rowaelinsmut @sarahjtrash @sparkleywonderful @highlord-tarquin @huntersbright @throneofglasslover @feyrhycien @goldbooksblack @lady-therion @aelin-and-feyre @writevswrong @fireheart-of-your-dreams

(I think that’s 20)

[jr01142]

@valenciaarcana​ @clevercloudpoetry​ @blue-eyes-and-a-broken-heart​ @thematrixhasyouworld​ @devolvingintomadness​ @reydriver​ @hisdarkredemption​ @wtf-idek-man​ @reyloqueen​ @twisted-reveries​ @flaviamitran​ @kenziescott2000​ @the-heir-of-terrasen​ @malecmaybemyotp​ @ifandomus​ @1800-fight-me​ @chlorinewaves​ @captain-book-lover​ @cyracourtney​ @tntwme​ @aaronwarner-willherondale​ @thebackoftheshed​ @thisismeandalwayswillbeme​ @writevswrong​ @vicbournt​ @poldark-things​ @the-other-sam​

[cherrycatexe]

10 songs I'm currently obsessed with

Thanks for tagging me @inquillery you are amazing! So some of my favourite songs right now are

1)For you : This song is so beautiful and it is a song which kinda is significant for me and my someone, so yeah I love all songs which reminds me of him and this one is great!

2)Capital letters: yeah again a song from the same movie I know, but all these songs are just so good!

3)The ones who Dream: oh gosh this song and it's words!! And magically enough I've been tagged by the singer of this song and I'm blessed! Like it brings out the feelings of the characters, if the IC members soo well,😍 first time I heard it I was so overwhelmed that I was about to cry

4)Heart of Steel : it's a Nessian song again by @inquillery and again I was so overwhelmed I cried and that line "oh I wish we had more time..." I got legit goosebumps!

5)How long: Yeah Charlie puth is awesome! I like the tune of this song

6)The wolves: Yeah Selena Gomez is also amazing! And I love this song!

7)Dress : This song has got perfect tune and I really really like this song!

8)Havana: ooh how can I forget that one! I just can't stop dancing to it!

9) Power: oh yes this song! It's just so perfect! Every girl should have this kind of power! It's like no one dominates you and you know that you got the power! And of course I love Little mix!

10) Him and I : Yet another song which perfectly fits me and my boyfriend! And Halsey's lyrics are just perfect! And the video!! Like short girl tall guy, it's also kinda us *giggles*

These were just few of the songs I've been listening to constantly recently, I got more! I'm a big music person! I would like to tag @sail-boat101 @writevswrong @catastrophicideass & ❤ @akgkn ❤

[writevswrong]

Quick sketch of Nesta from an upcoming scene of my fanfic. One of these days I will finish a full digital piece and upload it for y’all. 😂

[dreamilyzealousbird]

Tag game

Thank you for tagging me @lyannablackbeak !!

Rules: answer the 20 questions and tag 20 people you would like to get to know better!

Name: Alexandra

Nickname: Alex, Al

Zodiac: Aquarius

Height: 5'1"

Orientation: straight

Nationality: Mexican American

Favourite fruits: watermelon! 🍉

Favourite season: Summer🏖

Favourite books: acomaf, Harry Potter and the prisoner of Azkaban, Harry Potter and the Half Blood prince, the Hunger games, Flame in the mist, The Star touched Queen and a lot more I can't remember at the moment.

Favourite flowers: zinnias

Favourite scents: musk, sandalwood , and rain

Favourite colours: purple 💜

Favourite animals: tigers and dolphins

Coffee, Tea or Hot Chocolate: coffee

Average hours of sleep: 4-5

Cat or dog person: dog

Favourite fictional characters: Cassian, Nesta (acotar), Hermione (Harry Potter), Nikolai Lantsov (grishaverse), Okami (flame in the mist)

Number of blankets you sleep with: Two

Dream trip: Greece

Blog created: July 2017

Followers: 35

Tagging: @rowaelinsmut, @rhysand-vs-rowan , @manoriantrash101 @writevswrong

[thebluemartini]

A Monolith Between Them - Part II {Nessian}

A/N: Thank you SO much for all the likes and comments!! My heart is warmed :)

TITLE: A Monolith Between Them

PREVIOUS PARTS: Part I

FIC LENGTH: 4 Parts

FIC SYNOPSIS: Post-ACOFAS. After living in the Illyrian Mountains for six months, Nesta decides she wants to perform the Blood Rite. Cassian isn’t too pleased.

*This fic is also posted on AO3 and FF.

TAGGING: @my-fan-side @aelinashgalathynius @acotar-feels @city-of-fae @eclectichollow @strangeenemy @mindnumbmikey @saltierthanbottomofapretzelbag @fucking-winchester-trash @themoonunderstoodmynightmares @archeron-queen @jadeajibola @endlessworld246 @wolffrising @writevswrong

Part II - Weakness

Day One of the Blood Rite:

The day started out simple enough. Right as the sun had begun to rise, Devlon flew Nesta to a neighboring mountain of Ramiel to begin her journey. All of the participants had been dropped off at various points on the mountains surrounding the enormous monolith. If anyone wanted to form a team, they would have the challenge of finding each other. And if anyone wanted to strike down an enemy, they would have to determine if the challenge of tracking them down was worth it. For you only successfully performed the Blood Rite and became a true Illyrian Warrior if you completed the task of reaching the top of Ramiel within a week. If you didn’t...you were left to perish.

It was all a bit uneventful at first. When Devlon had dropped her off, he immediately flew off without a word, leaving Nesta to stare up at the daunting peak of Ramiel.

From what she could see, its slopes were filled with numerous boulders and other jagged rock formations. A layer of snow covered the entire mountain, with some areas more heavily blanketed with it than others.

On the mountain where she currently stood, she was at its midpoint. She would first need to descend this one to get to the base of Ramiel.  

The cold, bitter wind swirled past her, sending strands of her hair flying around her. Not wanting to waste a moment, she had immediately surged forward to begin her descent. Despite the blast of cold air hitting in her face, she could still feel the imprint of Cassian’s warm hand pressed against her cheek.

He had come to say goodbye…

With all of her nerves about the impending Blood Rite earlier that morning, she felt touched and comforted by his presence despite his desire for her not to do this. And that comfort in this stressful, overwhelming time overrode the anger she had felt towards him.

And his words…

“Come back to me.”

A chill went through her...and it didn’t seem to be because of the weather.

Could he have possibly implied -

But no, she couldn’t afford to dwell on his words right now and what they may have meant. She needed to stay focused and remain alert of her surroundings. Plus, whenever it came to trying to figure out Cassian’s feelings, she always ended up feeling like a complete fool.

Pushing Cassian out of her mind, she aimed her attention on the terrain in front of her and continued hiking down.

She wasn’t sure precisely how much time had passed, but it certainly wasn’t long before she thought of Cassian again.

She had discovered a stream amidst the trees and kneeled down to scoop up water to drink. The action reminded her of a scene from a romance novel she had read. In the story, a runaway princess had stopped to collect some water from a stream in a forest. A scoundrel had found her and was willing to help her escape to another town away from her royal duties for a price. But of course, love blossomed between them as they traversed the woods together and shared some steamy encounters.

Cassian gave her that book.

When she first arrived in the Illyrian Mountains, she had been unwilling to leave her room for weeks and refused to talk to anyone. Despite her fury at her situation and at Cassian, the persistent bastard still tried to help her. Knowing she was bored cooping herself up in that room, he would leave a romance novel for her outside her bedroom door each day.

For the first two days, she refused to take the books, not wanting to admit she was miserably bored. But on the third day, she gave in and grabbed all three books that were waiting for her. She read them all within the following days, and each day she eagerly awaited the next book Cassian would bring her.

Somehow, he had picked ones that were of her favorite genre - historical romances. All of them were engrossing and helped her forget that she was stuck in the Illyrian Mountains.

But of course she never told him how much she enjoyed them. She never said anything about the books. And yet, somehow he already knew…

“Nesta,” Cassian called out in greeting outside the closed door to her bedroom.

“What?” Nesta replied, annoyed. She had just reached a dramatic part of the novel Cassian gave her yesterday. She only had a few more pages left to read.  

“Did you enjoy, uh, ‘Seducing the Scoundrel’ last week?” Cassian asked her. “If so, I’ve got the sequel here: ‘Ravishing the Rogue.’”

“Just set it outside the door as usual,” Nesta instructed, acting like she was disinterested. However, internally, she was rejoicing that Cassian bought her the next installment of that series.

“Why don’t you open up the door and get it from me right now?” he asked in a way that told her he had a stupid, silly grin upon his face as he said it.

“Just leave it there. I’m not dressed yet.”

“I don’t mind,” Cassian said flirtatiously, causing Nesta to let out a grunt of annoyance.

“Just leave it there,” Nesta sternly said.

“No.”

“Stop being a buffoon. Just leave it there.”

“I think you need to get out of your room. It’s been over a week. So come get it.”

“No.”

“Then you’re not getting the sequel.”

Nesta let out a huff. “Fine. Then...I don’t want it.”

“Well, if you change your mind, I’ll leave it in the living room.”

“Fine.”

She heard him retreat from outside her door, then a few minutes later heard the sounds of the main cabin door shutting closed. Nesta finished reading the last few pages of her current book before putting it down on the nightstand beside her bed.

Now she didn’t have a book to spend the day reading. And one she desperately wanted to read was just sitting in the living room…

Getting up, she removed her nightgown and dressed for the day. Lately, she’d been spending all her days in a nightgown, but if Cassian was going to make her leave her room, she had to look somewhat presentable if she ran into any of the other females living in the cabin.

All she had to do was just walk down the hallway and into the main room to retrieve the book. It would be quick. She likely wouldn’t have to face anyone. Just run out and come back in.

Slowly, she made her way to her door, which creaked as she turned the knob, and pulled it open. Making her way down the hallway, she entered the living room and searched for where Cassian could have possibly left the book. Walking further into the room, she found the novel resting on one of the arms of the couches.

After she picked it up, she turned around and headed straight back to her room.

But that plan was thwarted by the presence of an Illyrian general. At the entrance to her bedroom stood Cassian, who was leaning back against the closed door with a smirk upon his face.

“I knew you’d be dying to read the sequel,” he commented.

Nesta frowned as she hugged the book to her chest. “Let me back in my room,” she ordered.

“Well, unfortunately, it’s locked. So I think it’s time we go for a walk.”

Nesta scowled. “How is it locked? I didn’t lock it! I didn’t even close the door.”

“Well someone must’ve flown in through your window to lock it and closed it behind him.”

Nesta glared at him. “You dolt!”

“Let’s go. I’ll let you back in once you walk through the camp with me. It won’t take longer than ten minutes.”

Nesta sighed out of annoyance. “Fine,” she relented. “But don’t you dare talk to me,” she demanded as she walked down the hallway toward the main door. Cassian silently followed behind her with a satisfied grin on his face.

  Day Two of Being Without Nesta:

Is she still alive?

Is she safe?

Is she alright?

Has she been attacked?

Has she been able to find food and shelter?

Overcome with worry over Nesta’s well-being, Cassian couldn’t fall asleep. He hadn’t been able to sleep since Nesta began the Blood Rite. Every minute of the past two days, he’d been living in constant wonder of what Nesta was doing and if she was still alive.

Surely, if she was no longer alive, he would feel...something? Being apart from her was already a source of torment, one that was extremely hard to bear.

Saying goodbye to her the day before was painful. The thought of possibly never seeing her again was a stab to his heart. Being separated from her and knowing she could die was suffocating. It felt like a vital part of him was missing, and his soul was constantly calling to hers.

He couldn’t help but wonder if this was how she felt at the thought of leaving him to die on the battlefield against Hybern. He had pleaded for her to go, but she couldn’t.

With a sigh over his restlessness, he left his bedroom to sit on the sofa in his living room. The action didn’t help him to stop thinking of Nesta though because everything had begun to remind him of her. As he stared into the flames within his fireplace, he thought of her fiery spirit that could leave you feeling scorched or warmed. The painting that hung above his fireplace was one depicting the Sidra River flowing through Velaris, which has now become a constant reminder of the place where he discarded his Winter Solstice present for her.

And this couch...

It had been a long day. Cassian had spent most of the day with Rhys visiting various camps, trying to quell their discontent. He was ready to crash upon his bed as soon as he got home.

Instead, he had come home to an unfamiliar sight that delayed his plans of going to sleep instantly.

Upon walking into his living room, he found Nesta sleeping on his couch while the flames within the fireplace had been dying down.

Heading to the fireplace, he added more logs to the fire before turning back to face Nesta. The breaths she was taking were short and shallow. Her face kept turning back and forth. Grabbing a blanket from a wooden chest across the room, Cassian laid it over her body.

“Nesta,” Cassian said softly as he sat on the edge of the couch beside her body and gently shook her shoulder.

Nesta abruptly opened her eyes. First, they appeared terrified at being awoken unexpectedly, but they evolved into a look of relief when she saw him beside her.

“Where have you been?” she asked sleepily as she sat up.

“I was out with Rhys today, talking to camp leaders,” he explained.

“Oh.”

“Why are you here?”

“I...I had a nightmare. It’s stupid. I should go.” Nesta moved to get off the couch, but Cassian halted her and didn’t budge from his seat.

“No, tell me. What happened?”

“Nothing. It was just a dream about the war, and I just had to come here and…” Nesta stopped.

“And what?” Cassian gently asked.

“And see that...you were still alive.”

That was the first time she had just decided to waltz into his home without even bothering to wait for him to answer the door or for him to even be home. It occurred a month or so ago...and what she had said had finally given him hope that she at least cared about him.

In that moment, he didn’t tease her about it, nor try to get her to admit anything more. The walls around her had come down and he didn’t want to see them close up again so soon.

 He’d do anything to see those walls brought down once more. But who knew if there would ever be a chance he could witness such a thing happen again...

  Day Three of the Blood Rite:

Nesta had an eerie, unsettling feeling that she was being watched.

She first sensed it yesterday while the sun was beginning its descent. She thought she heard some footsteps crunch through the snow while she was pulling a pine cone off a pine tree she had come across.

Leaving her feeling uneasy, Nesta decided not to sleep last night. Instead, she felt it best to continue trekking down the mountain in the dark until she figured out if someone was following her or not.

She felt so weak. Her feet and legs were aching terribly. She plopped down on the ground beside a boulder, allowing her legs to lay upon the ground stretched out, while she leaned back with the palms of her hands laid against the ground to support her.

Her belly let out a loud grumble. She was terribly famished. The few pine nuts she found yesterday hardly satiated her hunger.

She knew what it was like to go hungry, considering how her father had been unwilling to take care of her and her sisters for so long. At least with her current situation, she knew she would be getting her next meal in five days...as long as she survived the Blood Rite.

While the mountain was still covered in snow, the skies were clear and the sun gleamed over her. Feeling its warmth upon her face, Nesta closed her eyes and took a few deep, soothing breaths.

When she found herself drifting off, she shook her head and opened her eyes as she attempted to jolt herself awake. But when she did, she found an unfamiliar dark-haired Illyrian male standing over her and holding a stick in his hands that had been sharpened to a point on one end of it..

 Alarmed, Nesta scurried to get up. But with her weak legs, she wasn’t fast enough to get away from him. Instead, the Illyrian grabbed hold of her hair to yank her back to the ground. Nesta let out a yelp as she fell and made sure to turn on her back on the ground. The male immediately pinned her legs to the ground as Nesta squirmed and tried to get out of his grip. He acted quickly, aiming his stick for her chest.

Nesta managed to quickly wriggle her body so he missed her chest. Instead, his stick came crashing down into her thigh.

“AHHHHHH!” Nesta screamed in pain as the stick made contact. The Illyrian first groaned over missing the body part he intended to strike, but then grinned delightfully to himself when he heard her cry out. He crawled over Nesta’s squirming body as she tried to sit up and drag herself away from him.

He already had so much power over her…Her mind raced, thinking of what she could do to get through this…

“You shouldn’t have punched him. You should have slapped him, and then you would have won,” Cassian remarked as Nesta winced while rubbing her right hand. He was leaning against the fence surrounding the training ring where Nesta had just been defeated by an Illyrian male.

All the Illyrian bystanders and her opponent had already wandered off, but Nesta remained standing in the middle of the ring as she contemplated how she could have beat him.

“I didn’t ask for your advice,” Nesta snobbily replied while turned away from him.

 Cassian just smirked as he shrugged. “Just trying to help you, sweetheart. If you won’t allow me to train with you, the least I can do is gift you with some of my wondrous wisdom from my 547 years of life.”

“Wow, you’re so archaic and yet still haven’t grown out of being an obnoxious twit. I’m amazed no one has paralyzed you yet for being so pompous.”

Cassian continued to smile. “Everyone knows if they tried, it would be a losing fight.”

Nesta rolled her eyes, still facing away from him.  “You certainly have a wild imagination.”

Suddenly, she heard him approach her from behind, causing her to turn around. “Well, maybe I need someone to help tame my wild ways…” he said with a glint in his eye.

Nesta shook her head. “You’re ridiculous.”

“You’re the one who’s being ridiculous. You’re not letting the General Commander of the Night Court's army give you advice about your fighting tactic.”

Nesta sighed in defeat. “Fine. What should I have done to win?”

“You’re less likely to injure your hand with a slap rather than a punch. Next time, you need to cup your hand like so,” he said as he curved his right hand. “Then slap it against your opponent’s ear, which could rupture his eardrum and possibly knock him out. It’s even better if you are able to slap both of his ears at the same time.”

The Illyrian pushed Nesta’s shoulders to the ground and his hands made their way to her neck, attempting to squeeze her. “A female will never complete the Blood Rite,” he remarked cruelly.  

But with his head right in front of her, she was given the perfect opportunity. She lifted both of her hands and slammed them against his ears,

Immediately, the Illyrian’s grip on Nesta’s neck slackened, and he appeared dizzy for a second. Nesta managed to twist her upper body away from him before he could collapse on her.

He crashed hard to the ground face down and laid motionless.

With her heart rapidly pumping within her chest, Nesta slowly sat up and took a look at the stick protruding from her thigh. Blood was gradually seeping from the wound.

She couldn’t yank out the stick or else she risked severe bleeding. Instead, she would just have to break off as much of the stick as she could.

Taking a deep breath, she grabbed the stick with both of her hands. One was placed against her thigh to hold the hold the stick in the wound, while the other gripped the stick.. With a cry as the wood twisted in her thigh, Nesta broke off some of the stick.

Suddenly, she heard a groan escape from the Illyrian male beside her, causing her to gasp.

She had to get out of this area as soon as possible.

She attempted to quickly stand up, but the pain pounding n her thigh made her wobbly. Her instability caused her body to come crashing back to the ground. In her haste, she forgot about the big boulder that was near her. Her head collided with the huge rock during the fall, knocking her unconscious.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A/N: So when I first had the idea for this fic, I only really wanted to write what would happen before the Rite and after the Rite, but not really about the Rite itself. But then I was like "Well, I at least have to write a little about the Rite..." so hopefully it's going okay so far, haha. Let me know what you think! And let me know if you want to be tagged!

[theladyofdeath]

You should add @writevswrong to your list! She wrote a wonderful Nessian fic!

added!

[lady-therion]

Bookish Tag

I was tagged by @crazybookladythings - thanks hon! 

P.S. The Secret Garden was one of my childhood faves! 

1) What book has been on my book shelf the longest?

The Princess Bride by William Goldman 

2) What is your current read, last read, and next read?

The Language of Thorns by Leigh Bardugo (current read) 

A Strange Hymn (Bargainer Series) by Laura Thalassa  (last read) 

Godsgrave (Nevernight Chronicles) by Jay Kristoff (next read) 

3) Which book does everyone else like but you hated?

Caraval by Stephanie Garber. I wanted to like it, but man, it just wasn’t for me. :/ 

4) Which book do keep telling yourself you’ll read, but probably won’t?

I would come back as a ghost if it meant I could finish everything on my TBR pile.

5) Which book are you saving for retirement?

All my disposal income goes towards books. All of it.

6) Last Page: read it first or wait till the end?

Wait till the end so I can savor all that sweet, sweet buildup.  

7) Acknowledgements: waste of ink and paper or interesting aside?

Aspiring authors should always read the acknowledgements! They usually contain the names of the author’s agent, publishers and/or editorial team ;0) This comes in handy when you’re ready to query. Also, if the author’s anything like Neil Gaiman or Joe Hill, there’s bound to be a hidden short story in there! 

8) Which book character do you want to switch places with?

Nesta ;) 

9) Do you have a book that reminds you of something specific in your life (a person, a place, or a time)?

The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath always reminds me of my undergrad. Pabs at the pub. Fall picnics in the quad. Late nights at the library. Feeling impatient for the future to start and scared that it would happen too soon... 

10) Name a book you acquired in some interesting way:

We get advanced copies of books at my office all the time. One of my co-workers pushes them in on a big ol’ cart and we all pop up from our seats like book-hungry gophers until we’re called over to check out what’s new!

11) Have you ever given away a book for a special reason to a special someone?

I gave a copy of City of Thieves by David Benioff to a friend who was moving to another country. It was one of my favorite books to read this year and he sent me a picture of it after he was finished—his photo included the book with three eggs. If you’re intrigued, you should definitely read this book. 

12) Which book has been with you to most places?

Deathless by Catherynne M. Valente. Stop everything you’re doing right the fuck now and add this fucking book to your fucking TBR. I plan to buried with this, for goddsake. 

13) Any “required reading” that you hated in high school, but wasn’t so bad ten years later?

I was always the kid who thought 90% of “required reading lists” was both bogus and overrated. Plus, those lists have barely changed for like DECADES and there are so many good books out there! 

14) What the strangest item you’ve found in a book?

I like getting well-worn copies from people who I know were also former English majors. Because then I get to see notes scrawled in the margins like, “This whole passage means SEX” with three underlines beneath it. 

15) Used or New

Both!

16) Stephen King: Literary genius or opiate of the masses?

Trick question. I don’t buy into the “low-brow” vs. “high-brow” debate. Stephen King is a good author because he works hard, produces a lot, and makes readers happy. 

17) Have you ever seen a movie you liked better than the books?

I’ve made the mistake of watching a movie before the book and I’ve regretted it almost every single time. 

18) Conversely, which book should NEVER have been introduced to celluloid?

Twilight by Stephenie Meyer. 

19) Have you ever read a book that’s made you hungry, cookbooks being excluded from this question?

Haruki Murakami almost always makes me hungry whenever he describes food. In the opening passage of The Wind-up Bird Chronicle, he’s got one of his main characters cooking pasta and my mouth literally watered. 

20) Who is the person whose book advice you’ll always take?

Most of my co-workers are big readers (it’s the nature of the job). So I always trust them when it comes to recommendations. :) 

Tagging these lovelies: @aelin-and-feyre; @rhaesgar; @iamnesta; @nestasbucket; @writevswrong; @highladyoferilea; @queen-archeron; @fck-tamlin; @modernbookfae; @fiery-feyre

[cleo-queen-of-pirates]

Get to Know You Questions Tag

Thanks, @spiritedgalaxies & @onceuponabookblr Rules: Answer 30 questions then tag 20 blogs you would like to know better: Understood! Ready, set,… GOOOOOO!!! 1. Nicknames: Fi 2. Gender: Female 3. Zodiac sign: Scorpio 4. Height: 157cm 5. Time: 2.27pm 6. Birthday: November 7. Favorite Bands: 90s stuff 8. Favorite Solo Artist: Jewel, Missy Higgins, Kimbra 9. Song Stuck in my Head: The ‘Letter of the Day’ song from Sesame Street 10. Last Movie I Watched: The Dressmaker 11. Last Show I Watched: How I Met Your Mother 12. When Did I Create my Blog: My best friend @bitofbookishness created it for my Christmas present last year. 13. What Do I Post: Bookish, Cats, Skyrim, Stargate, ballet, pretty things 14. Last Thing I Googled: cast of The Dressmaker 15. Do I have any other Blog: @vala-queen-of-pirates (bookish & pirate), @colourfaerie (book rainbows), @the-writing-squirrel (writing blr) 16. Do I get Asks: Only tags as yet 17. Why Did You Choose your Url: my friend chose it as I like pirates 18. Following: 900 ish (too many?) 19. Followers: 130 20. Favorite Color: green, aqua 21. Average Hours if Sleep: Whatever I can get with a 1 year old 22. Lucky Number: 2,4,11 23. Instruments: Piano, guitar 24. What am I Wearing: Jeans, knitted jumper 25. How Many Blankets Do I Sleep With: doona 26. Dream Job: writer, archaeologist/historian, zookeeper 27. Dream Trip: Tropical or historic 28. Favorite Food: too many to name 29. Nationality: Australian 30. Favorite Song Now: am enjoying Kimbra Now to tag some lovelies! @bookwormbrooke, @gingerbookblogger, @jonnythemadhatter, @writevswrong, @rain221bakerstreet, @the-useless-follower, @myweeksallbooked, @soulofpages, @books-are-my-food, @gluecklicherbaum, @tinybookgirl, @banginbookblog, @pagesinmylife, @beckyinbookland, @lovelifelovebooks, @caitlyn-reads, @abookishreverie, @spiegelgold, @bookswithmichelle, @the-baby-adventures

[0erasurehero0]

Tag Game: post the first line of your work in progress (yeaboi)

Copying the rules from @i-put-the-sass-in-assassin (by the way thanks for the tag!!). Post the first line of your WIP (or any particular line you’re proud of) without context, then tag as many people as there are words in your line- or until you have run out of people to tag if it’s long!! If you don’t have a WIP, share a line from one of your favorite books.

(oh boi here I go) 

Gates of Galilah, chapter one (first line)  (WIP) : A war cry sounded across the lands, a cry laced with pain and a promise. (this is the only one I’m tagging).

My favorite line from my story so far (it’s two lines fight me): “Say hello to the devil for me, Prince Silas.”/ As I pulled the dagger from his heart, slamming the dagger hilt deep into his shoulder, the dying prince locked eyes with me and rasped, “Hello.”

Now for the tagging: 

@i-put-the-sass-in-assassin, @cutiematsuno, @highladyfxyre, @fiery-feyre, @rowan-buzzard-whitethorn, @kitty-aest, @aelin-and-feyre, @a-court-of-ink-and-paper, @writevswrong, @purpleotakutrash, @todaybybryn, @the-bookish-soul, @feyre-fireheartt, @xmindlessrookiex, @the-dark-instruments

I’m pretty sure i tagged as many people as I was supposed to and if I didn’t then oh well. If you were bothered by me tagging you--then oh well I am sorry (message me and I won’t do it again). But if you read this then I appreciate it!

I have 283 pages and 15 chapters, but it needs editing, lol. 

Thanks for taking time to read this. If you have a WIP, do this too. It’s fun.

[writevswrong]

Eris Fanfic * When The Last Ember Falls * Chapter Seventeen

When The Last Ember Falls by L.J. LaFleur

Nesta:

I wandered into the bathing room, everything from the tall ceilings to the copper bathtub mirrored the one in Eris’ chambers. I was thankful it was the same. Despite the incident with Ronan, I still felt safe knowing it was a replica.

Cindra waited outside the bathroom, informing me that she was going to pick out my gown since that’s what a guardian should do. I think she just really wanted to rummage through the wardrobe. Can’t say I blame her. It was packed with everything your heart could ever desire.

I stepped into the dark water, not realizing I was holding my breath. Willing the carnelian light to the surface of my skin, I formed similar patterns that Eris had once shown me. Breathing normally again, I sat down, the corner of my mouth curving upwards. I was still too scared to fully submerge, but this felt nice—really, really nice.

As I dried off, I thought of him. Of our time together since my arrival.  

Then of Cassian and the guilt that was not there.

The guilt that should be there. He was right, I lost him on the battlefield. The one right outside these castle walls. Yet I wasn’t haunted, broken. Why did I not feel broken because of this?

Was it anger that pushed the guilt away? Was it happiness? Either way, I did not want to think of Cassian again. The bastard commander chose his fate, I should be able to choose mine.

I approached the magnolia bedframe where Cindra had laid out two choices. “Thank you for your kindness, Cindra,” I meant every word. She didn’t run from me when I turned into a Gryphon and nearly killed her. She didn’t judge me when I showed up naked and crying for Eris. She didn’t laugh, when I thought her and Eris were…gods, what foolish thoughts plague me.

“Pleasure is all mine,” she flashed a mischievous smile, “it finally gives me a chance to be a woman again.”

“I guess wearing armor all the time would do that,” I acknowledged, attempting to stifle my laughter. I liked her. She was fierce and unapologetic, a fighter.

Cindra bowed her head, guiding me to my options. “I think the metallic one is best but just incase you don’t want to feel too glitzy, here’s another in emerald. You looked gorgeous in the linen option when you first arrived.”

“The one I ripped?”

“Yes. But you still looked good. You have a body, flaunt it Gryphon.”

With a raised brow, I chuckled, “so, it was you, who picked the low-cut dress out?”

“It wasn’t me,” she contested as her eyes bulging, “it was given to me by the Lady of Autumn.”

I reached for the metallic gown, her first choice. Still not believing Eris’ mother picked out such a revealing dress. Why on Prythian would she?  

Cindra had to help me into the copper and gold ensemble. It was form fitting, very, very form fitting. I examined the swooping neckline that connected to the dangling straps off my shoulders. From the beaded bands, a cascade of golden Ombre material fell to the floor. Slits in the fabric revealed my sparkling sleeves. 

She laced up the center of the shimmering bodice with velvet ribbons, making sure my breasts were pushed up more than they have ever been. I blushed at the provocative neckline, by the gods…if I moved wrong I might just fall out.

“If you move wrong, you will fall out,” Cindra warned, finishing with an elegant bow just beneath my cleavage. Her eyes dancing from the sight of me, “just you wait until you see this!” she squealed, dragging me to the mirror. She had me close my eyes while she adjusted the cathedral length train; smoothing out the ripples of fabric. Cindra whispered, “okay, open them.”  

I obliged, not able to recognize myself. Not in a bad way at all but that I looked new—whole. I felt like a star that had fallen from the sky. A walking sun in the land of darkness. Black and blue attire did not do me justice, I decided.

The long sleeves hugged my skin, cut into perfect diamonds that attached to two golden rings on my middle fingers. I looked closer, noticing the rings were engraved in a language I did not know. Bands of perfection.

Pearls and garnets were sewn onto the straps and the train…well, the train had much more material than I originally thought. There was even a bit of swooping fabric that connected the straps. The only open section of the train or cape—whatever it is—revealed my nearly bare back.  

A thin, see-through material covered majority of my spine and ribcage. Looking from my shoulder and down, I self-consciously studied the scar I had received from Tamlin. You couldn’t notice such a hideous flaw in a gown like this.  

Cindra motioned for me to sit at the sunstone vanity. “Do you prefer the golden ribbon with pearls or the copper ribbon with garnets?” She held both of the options up, her brows snapping together as she tried to decide what would look best.

“Pearls, they’re my favorite,” I uneasily shifted in my seat. I wasn’t used to this type of luxury without a price. I wasn’t used to being dolled up by someone else or even attending a ball, not since my time with Ronan. But it was different then, a fight for survival.

My palms grew sweaty as I thought of the amount of people who would be in attendance tonight. How many of them saw me bare before? On the day Beron forced me to have a walk of shame through the throne room.  

She dropped the burnt orange ribbon on the table, “duly noted.” Cindra released my hair from it’s prison of a bun. The cascading waves of gold and brown were amplified by the dress. “So…” she began, weaving the ribbon through my long locks, “he’s quite the High Lord, huh?”

I turned into a column, stiff and heartless, “is this your version of small talk?”

“I was never very good with easy subjects,” Cindra scrunched up her nose, cackling at my resistance.

I swallowed hard, feeling the overwhelming sense of sisterly conversation that I’ve never experienced. “You want to know why I’m here, don’t you?” I questioned, knowing the answer before she could speak.

She shook her head, her mouth twisting, “that’s not—no, no.” Cindra stopped braiding my hair, “yes?”

I pursed my lips to the side, feeling the truth unravel before I could stop it, “I had run away from my family. That’s when he found me, Eris and his brothers.” I dragged my fingers against the countless options of earrings she set in front of me. “I ended up here, afraid and broken.” I chose the dangling pearls that would accent the others on my gown and in my hair. “He saved me. Then he saved me again and again without ever asking for anything in return.”

“Were you here during the war?” Cindra finished my hairstyle with two small braids to keep the ribbon in place. She tucked the velvet strings, displaying my pointed ears.

I saw my reflection, the fae side of me that I couldn’t hide. As a habit, I almost redid my hairstyle, afraid of the past haunting me if I did not cover my ears.

Cindra slapped my wrist before I could do any damage. She attached the dangling pearl earring, careful not to poke my neck.

I knew she was patiently standing by for my answer. Maybe that’s what the Autumn Court is known for? Patience. Or maybe Cindra and Eris knew I would speak if given time.

“Everything,” I replied quietly, feeling the anxiety wash over me. I took a deep breath, noticing that Cindra had stopped, she was waiting for me to either fall apart or keep going. I didn’t want to hide anymore, whether that was from bodies of water or my ears. “He saved my life and Cassian’s,” I finally finished, exhaling the past that threatened to ruin my future.

Cindra added the other earring then went to the wardrobe for some shoes. She hollered over her armored shoulder, “where is this Cassian?” She fetched the low heels, noticing a hair that was out of place from across the room.

I peeked up beneath my long lashes, her fingers working effortlessly as she waited for my reply. “I don’t know,” I responded, knowing that was the truth. I didn’t have a clue of his whereabouts. I hadn’t thought about it much.  

She released her hands from my hair to apply a rosy balm to my lips. Her eyes glimmered with hope and anticipation, “I guess this is perfect timing then.”

“Timing?”

“Well, I do not see Cassian here or your family from the Night Court. I only see you and him. It seems like fate, that’s all.”

I didn’t know what to say, a mixture of feelings clawing to get out.

“I’ve only just become his guardian and I can already see the effect you have on him. I just hope that as he nurses your broken heart back to good health, that you will not break his in the process.” She kneeled before me, slipping on the pair of silky heels.

My jaw tightened as Cindra’s words sliced into my core. I raised to my feet, quickly retying the deep-v bodice. Desperately needing to breathe before I exploded, I needed this off—I needed out.

She was right, he was mending my heart but what about his? Was I hurting him by being here? Was I taking advantage of him and his kindness? Or was this different?

Was there something else?

Cindra stopped my trembling hands with hers. She had to redo the bodice, this time giving me a little breathing room. “For what it’s worth,” Cindra mumbled while stepping away.

I stared up at the guardian, searching for a sign of hope. My flames quickly curled around my fingertips before sinking back into my flesh. Please say something…anything…

“You will break his heart either way in this dress.”

[lockedupinalibrary]

SJM Fandom Podcasts – Week 3

First of all, thank you so much @aelin-and-feyre and for tagging me! I really enjoyed answering these questions!

So I tried recording this, but my accent bothered me too much so I’m just writing this down.

(Warning: there could be some spelling/grammatical errors in here that may be painful for your eyes to read. I’m sorry dear Eyes Of Whoever’s Taking The Time To Read This)

 Who is the best written villain?

Arobynn is a really interesting character. His evil acts are so much more complicated than those of other villains in the series. (Amarantha puts poison in drinks and tortures and abuses people; Hybern is a mass murderer– these are pretty basic evil things.)Arobynn’s actions are way more thought out and stretch over multiple books, what makes his actions so much more interesting to read.

Yes, Maeve is also super complex and soo well written, but that bitch just doesn’t deserve the title Best Written

Who do I hate the most?

Maeve. If someone doesn’t kill her soon I’m going to lose my mind. She’s FAKED A MATING BOND, RAPED at least 75% of her Cadre (these are supposed to be the persons she trusts the most, what the actual fuck is wrong with her??!!), and she has Aelin IN A COFFIN. A COFFIN!!

I hope she dies a slow, painful death.

Who do you love to hate?

I love hating Keir. I hate the guy, but I loved reading the scene where Rhysand hands him his ass and brakes his bones. (?something might be slightly wrong with me?) I also love hating him because his plans never work out the way he wants them to. You want to visit Velaris? Well, have fun being very very thirsty. He’s the most unsuccesfull villain in SJM’s book. I almost pity him. Almost.

Who is the most underrated villain?

Erawan 100%. I never really payed attention to him, because I was thinking something in the lines of “Mehh, Aelin’s gonna kill him soon enough” so well, I miiight have been underrating him.

What theories to you have for these villains in future books?

I’ve never really thought of this before. I hope Meave is killed by Fenrys though. Even though it’s not really mentioned that often in the books, I think he’s suffered the most of Maeve’s abuse.

Do you think they are misunderstood or completely evil?

I think all villains In SJM’s books are pure evil. But here’s my problem, in my eyes, Tamlin is not a villain: he still has some sense left of right and wrong, and in the moments he didn’t, he was mostly suffering from PTSD.  Don’t get me wrong, that is in NO WAY an excuse for the awful things he did to Feyre. This guy is bad and he did some seriously fucked up shit; he’s dominating, abusive and so so much more, but I feel like he’s a victim of the society he lives in and the events in the books. I think being dominating is an actual part of who he is, but I don’t think he could have grown to be so controlling as he is, if he weren’t High Lord. He acts a lot like a spoiled brat who’s never heard the word ‘no’ and needs to get his priorities in order, but I think he might have finally realized that at the end of ACOWAR UPDATE: I'm a monster I forgot what he did to Lucien omg why am I like this?! I really should have explained myself better: I HATE Tamin, but to me he's not a villain. He's an awfull person, but not the "I like seeing people suffer"-kind of villain? (I hope this makes sense? It's midnight and I have no clue where I'm going with this post) .

Different ways people interpret them in fanfiction

I have the brains of a goldfish so I literally can’t remember most titles of the most fanfics I read, so this list is going to be short af

Shadows and Darkness: One and the Same is a fic written by @azrielsiphons and it’s awesome. It features the King of Hybern, but that’s really all I can say without spoiling.

@writevswrong is writing this incredible Nessian fic. Some chapters take place in the Autumn Court and I’m so curious about the way she’s writing Eris at this point.

I’m tagging anyone who wants to participate! 

(there’s no time limit, so you can post it whenever you have the time :) )

[thebluemartini]

Thank you fanfic writers and fanartists!! (especially @writevswrong, @other-mholshev, and @venusmelody <3) 

[sparkleywonderful]

I saw a Nessian fic floating around but it was one its most recent chapter update and I can't seem to find in anywhere.. all I remember about the fic was that there was a gif at the beginning of each chapter. Have any clue which fic this is or who wrote it?

HI Nonnie,

There are two that I know of that are Nessian and start with gifs. 

1. @writevswrong is writing an untitled Nessian piece that is up to 13 parts: FanficNessian The chapter links are at the bottom of each post. Note this is full of angst, but it is nessian so angst is the way to go. 

2. @propshophannah wrote Dark Paradise a true heart wrenching affair with a happy ending. 

Happy Reading!  -Mel