#xelle.gush

[sealovinq]

i'm so in love rn 😭

[xelles-archive]

ok here she is!!

sjsidifbfdofjgn- 😭😭😭

*cough* anyway. her name is remi denetsosie! she's a bubbly, clumsy, short gal who somehow took interest in me despite fully knowing the fact that i'm considered as some kind of delinquent in our school- and it's exactly why i love her. 😔 she's a cis pansexual and goes by she/her pronouns!

as of my s/i- i can't find a good picrew for him yet but his name is vance nighy. just like i mentioned earlier, he was considered like a delinquent in his school because he always has this snarly look in his face and likes to pick fights. he's a demiboy gynesexual and goes by he/they pronouns!

our dynamic is pretty much like this:

picrew.

[sealovinq]

there is no fucking way a friend immediately got me hooked to a character from a media i've never even seen once by merely showing screenshots

[sealovinq]

thinking. what if i and jose had a beach wedding

[sealovinq]

XELLE OMG HI its been way too long 😭😭 idk if u rmbr me .. previously @/recordplayershipping (scout) !!! i saw u as i was clearin out my discord friends list recently n i wanted to come see how u were doing 🥺 i hope schools going well!!! also take this as a free pass to introduce me to the f/o ur fixated most on rn!!!!!!! <3

HELLO HELLOO!!!! AAAAAAA SCOUT I MISSED YOU SM!!! of course i remember you omg you're literally one of my fav moots /gen i'm sorry if this took too long WAAA i didn't know which f/o to talk about.... and yes i've been SUPER busy with school and it's starting again in a few days so 😭 BUT TYSM FOR STOPPING BY, I HOPE YOU'RE DOING WELL TOO<3333!!!

it's actually been a while since i got a new f/o... but i started rewatching m.lp (my lit.tle pon.y) and am currently around season 5 and erm... ya girl got a crush on one of the main 6 GGRGRBRHRJFJ she reminds me of my partner irl so WIWIWIEIJEJ HAHA NOT SURPRISING....

in reference to that previous post of mine i was actually referring to appl.ejack 🙈🙈 LOOK who doesn't like a masculine woman (mare in this case) who can carry me without breaking a sweat amiright WEEEHEHHEJD.... and the human version (NOT E.QG) fanarts of her DID NOT HELP because they all drew her with a muscular body and i am literally!!! so weak for that!!! HELLO!!! SAVE A HORSE RIDE A COWGIRL 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥

i've made a ponysona too UABAYUSBDHDJ i haven't drawn her with aj as of yet because i suck at drawing ponies 😭 and i haven't made much lore about them either but i just like thinking about them hehehehehe

here she is!! my precious lil gem!! i based her off of the color palette of the beach hehe classic ocean-loving me. she's besties with ra.rity and would often come to her for advice about what to do with aj (pre-dating). again i haven't developed her but she's very Pretty and i love her so so so much. i would love to see her getting introduced to farm life by aj even though she's a bit icky about dirt but she'd do anything for the Girlfriend!!!

speaking of ra.rity i actually kin her! so it doesn't bother me when i see ra.rijack or any other ships involving aj tbh. BUT HELL when i do see ra.rijack I GET SO HYPED BECAUSE WE ARE SO CANON<333!! yes she is holding my waist and kissing me on the mouth yes that is me with the curly purple hair ehe

idk i just love aj a lot 🥺🥺🤧 i love especially how she's so blunt sometimes UABSHDIJD and she's so hardworking and does everything for her friends and such a sweetheart eeuuuuuuehhhh.... i wanna smooch her so badly and make her flustered AWAWWAEAEEEEEE

also i've re-explored my gender and decided i am more of genderfae (basically a gender that fluctuates to any gender except masculine ones, for example i can be feminine or neutral any time but never masculine ones) and have developed an attraction to mascs which aj perfectly fits into... aha <33

i don't think i'd be shipping with her e.qg version. they're canonically high schoolers and usually range around 16-18 but it's not confirmed so it's still kinda weird so i'm sticking to her pony version! og is always the best anyway 😍😍🙏

look at Her and her Handsome Face

SHE!!! 🥺🥺🥺🥺🧡🧡🧡🧡

[sealovinq]

goodmorning i miss jose

[sealovinq]

my girlfriend speaks so much like jose

[sealovinq]

one thing i noticed is that i've never been treated right, not just in romantic relationships, but also with people in general (/nbh), that every time i see my relationship with someone detoriating or at least going through trouble, i always think it would end right there and then. but then you have my girlfriend, no matter how many times i push her away and tell her to leave me because i convinced myself that i give her such a hard time, she sticks and stays, and insists that we fix it together. it's not everyday or even in a lifetime that i could find somebody as persistent as her, and i'll do everything in my ability to treasure her and love her like i've always wanted to.

[xelles-archive]

gushing time babey (may or may not have been inspired by @nougatships)

ok but like. why does nobody talk about jose. like- legit, i don't see anyone talking about how good he looks! all they say is that he's underrated, his item is useless, blah blah. i don't care if he's underrated, you're literally talking to his spouse! talk to me, tell me how he could easily swoon people of all genders and still have a smug smirk on his face even if tons of people are staring at him! he's too overconfident of his status and looks, yes, but do i even get the chance to complain? well, even if i did, i still wouldn't. he is such a handsome man and his loving gaze is just- aaaaaaa. >////>

i don't remember the exact date when he was announced, but it was around early july/late june. when i got the notification of a new survivor, i was intrigued, but that was mostly because i was still interested in idv. and ohhhh boy, little did i know that i would see the love of my life! yes, i fell in love with jose at first sight! his hair- his outfit- his eyes- everything about him seemed so perfect to me. he had all my tastes in one go and i couldn't help but scream to my clanmates about how good the new survivor looks.

just a few days passed and he already has fanart?! wtf?! they didn't even announce his official personality traits or backstory at all! ok, look, when i tell you idv artists are fast, they ARE fast. the first fanart i saved of him was on july 10th, which is our anniversary. the fanart was sent to me by a friend (they must have taken note of my gushing lmao) and i just went !!!!!! aaaaaaa?!?!??!!!?? 😳😳😳

then he was finally released! yay! too bad i didn't have enough clues (game currency) to buy him. soooooo i sacrificed my time to get more clues. i bought him after a few weeks or so. he was officially in my survivor list at august 1st. it was one of the happiest moments of my life. i was probably stimming so much at that time.

GOSH, don't even get me started on his skins. he only has two skins that looks visually stunning (i got one of them a few days ago!) but aaaaaaa, he slays his other skins too. he could wear a torn blanket and i'd still be in love like a helpless puppy.

everyone in my clan knew how big of a simp i am for jose. they always ping me when they find content of him (which is rare because, yeah, he's kinda underrated) and i'm actually thankful for that! i go batshit crazy with emojis, because duh, who wouldn't be impressed by someone who is literally the meaning of charming?! ok, maybe that's just me. but at some point, you gotta relate to that too!

jose was always the one i apologized to — even if i haven't even done anything entirely wrong. i was just.. too harsh on myself. when i catch myself doing that, i always turn to jose, cry, and apologize to him. at that time i didn't know what self shipping or f/o is, but i'm glad i do now. i still apologize to him, but this time, he's actually there to respond to me. he tells me it's okay to make mistakes, whether they be big or small, and he still loves me no matter what. he sees my flaws as perfection and the definition of who i really am. aaaa what the hell honestly! how can he accept someone as shitty as me?! i'm so grateful for his presence and existence, i won't ever stop loving him.

curse my alexithymia. >:( i can't find the right words to express my love to him. i'm much more better with actions. u-u and sometimes i can't even tell what he's feeling or thinking because he always has a bitch resting face. how rude. do you want me to kiss you so i could get rid of that look or what??

intimacy. something jose always likes does to do with me. i get so flustered whenever i feel his hands caressing my body, aksbjdjfbfjd oh my gosh. i don't even want to think about it- AAAAAA.

i've actually never been attracted to those who have facial hair. jose apparently changed that?! his stache looks so nice and neat, oh cheese loowees. it sometimes tickles my face whenever we kiss. A-AH WHAT THE HELL WHY DID I EVEN MENTION THAT HHHHHHH. ō///n///ō

why 😭 does 😭 jose 😭 not 😭 have 😭 much 😭 official 😭 art 😭 i need more!!!!! i mean, his fanarts are probably better because he looks so hot in it- but i want something from the creators themselves!! i wanna know if they actually care about him like i do!

kwjsidjfhfjdjf i could endlessly ramble about him but i don't want to keep you here for too long. i just love him so much, to the point that i would sacrifice every atom for him. y'know, metaphorically. aldhjffjdbhdb. he has helped me a lot through drastic times and i love him for that. he's usually sarcastic, but he tones down his humor in serious situations. he's very straightforward too! it helps a lot because i get to know his opinions on things. yay i don't get struggle understanding him now. but aaaaa everything about him is so perfect?? i couldn't ask for anyone better. he makes me so happy and i love him so much!

[xelles-archive]

you can gush to me any time bruv!! anyways 🎫 here’s a gush pass bc i am Incredibly Intrigued by this new f/o of yours and would love to hear more!!!👀👀👀👀

ksndufhfjdjfnv y'all are too nice to me omg I LOVE Y'ALL /p

@fo-babes @lilacslovers i hope it's ok to tag u guys. 🥺 i don't want y'all to think i ignored ur offer!! i appreciate it tons! :']

also @lovinggreeniehours @jils-stuff @yawnbarn (i hope i didn't bother y'all) bc i want y'all to look at my girl 👉👈

OKAY. OKAY. she's actually VERY, VERY new. like i just made her yesterday while i was taking a shower. and i'm already making up so much scenarios w/ her in my head??? like DEADASS, i already have an idea of how i and she got together. she was always persistent in trying to talk to me even though i push her away every time she even dares to utter a word to me. she has so much dedication and i can't ask for anyone better. I LOVE HER SO MUCH, i'm actually so happy she decided to stick w/ me despite everyone telling her to stay away from me. like, GIRL, you love me that much??? I LOVE YOU TOO. 😩😩😩

she is so DAMN CUTE. i haven't drawn her yet but SHE'S JUST SO CUTE ALRIGHT. her ash blonde (is it ash blonde? idk ejdjbfbfb) hair fits her so well, her little red ribbon is so cute too, and whenever she looks at me w/ those yellow bright eyes, i just melt. she's already cute in terms of appearance but she decided to go overboard with her personality like AAAAA. she is my ray of sunshine and i won't allow anyone to hurt my sugar baby gaaaaahhhh!!!!! if i ever see a single scratch on her, I WILL RIOT.

she is so clumsy and sweet, so kind and thoughtful. she always looked out for me before we even started dating, she used to bring me lunch whenever i don't have the money to buy one or i just straight up forgot. HER COOKING IS THE BEST. after trying out her food for the first time, i asked her if she made any more. when that happened, her eyes lit up and she started to excitedly (AND LOUDLY) ask if i liked it. AND THERE WERE PEOPLE AROUND THE HALLWAY SO YOU'D KNOW HOW FLUSTERED I WAS AT THAT MOMENT- i was trying so hard to shush her but we still caught everyone's attention. you bet your ass that they were weirdly looking at us and internally going like "what the hell is that girl doing with the most intimidating guy in school".

her name is so beautiful. like, just, beautiful. it goes off the tongue so well. remi denetsosie. darling, let me take your surname and replace it w/ mine instead SKSBJDHXBB.

GOD, if y'all ever decide to send me a letter in remi's pov, I'M LEGITIMATELY GOING TO CRY. her voice is the sweetest thing i've ever heard and if i were to project it into a piece of content that i wasn't expecting at all? FNFKFOGKKG I'LL SEE YOU AT MY GRAVE BYE. /s

our height difference actually makes everything better (i'm 6 inches taller than her) because she has to look up at me so innocently and I EASILY LOSE IT. i cover a portion of my face with a hand, look away, and mumble something like "why are you so damn cute" or maybe even "stop looking at me like that". YOU KNOW, THE TYPICAL TSUNDERE STUFF. but then remi smiles even wider and I BLUSH EVEN MORE FURIOUSLY. she unintentionally makes me flustered and i wanna squish her cheeks and place a hard kiss on her lips!!!!!

at times when i'm more comfortable in showing my affection, it's actually vice versa. now it's my turn to make her blush. in ways which i cannot explain because my blog would not be child friendly anymore-

I'M KIDDING, I'M KIDDING. well, partially. ANYWAY it's usually me pestering her w/ kisses and complimenting her in a low voice (she likes it somehow, don't ask). hearing her giggles and feeling her wiggle under me is one of the best things i could experience. it always reminds me that i'm the dom in this relationship WAHAJAJJFNFJ-

she brings me so much happiness, you have no idea. w/ her, i am able to express myself freely and to breathe properly. at my home [tw: abuse mention], i can't even sleep peacefully because my abusive brother would always take out his anger on me. it's one of the reasons why i made that tough persona at school. when i told remi about that, she immediately went to hug me and started apologizing as if it was her fault. i simply patted her head and told her it's okay, and that everything is fine now that we're together. i can't bear the thought of something similar happening to remi, and i need to protect her w/ my whole life if so.

i just- i love her so much. my heart is so full of love for her right now and i don't think i can keep it in any longer. brb gonna give remi thousands of kisses.

[xelles-archive]

is anyone available for me to gush to them 👉👈

[xelles-archive]

if it weren't for my genderfluid ass (i'm still in a boy mood), i could say i'm being extremely gay rn but NO, i'm being heterosexual af but tbh i don't think i should even complain because it's about my girl remi anyway. <3

[xelles-archive]

WHY DOES THE GUY IN THE LOVE STORY MUSIC VIDEO HAVE A SIMILAR OUTFIT AS JOSE????

WHAT THE SHITORJTBIGOGJFJF AKANANAAAAAAAAA

[xelles-archive]

I HAVE ONCE AGAIN GAINED A NEW F/O

[xelles-archive]

why do i get new f/o's every month

[xelles-archive]

i'm gonna set the new f/o aside and watch his source content tomorrow but for now i'm gonna yearn so hard for din