#yandere steel ball run

[thornybubbles]

You Give Love a Bad Name (Yandere Diego x Backstabber Reader)

NOTE: I didn’t write anything for the entire month of October and I feel awful about that. Imagine me, a lover of horrifying JoJo fanfics, not writing anything for the Halloween season! Unforgivable! So I’m gonna try to make up for it all this month starting with this story. Please accept this as part of my apology! 

NOTE 2: I don’t know why I keep pairing poor Diego up with criminal Readers. It's an aesthetic, I guess. 

Warnings: YANDERE, possessiveness, very dark themes and implications, degradation, violence towards Reader, threats, and other forms of unpleasantness. Also Reader is kind of an asshole. I head canon that yandere Diego is a lot wilder and meaner than regular Diego (not that regular Diego was nice). No smut!

Diego hated himself for letting you into his heart. He wanted to hate you, but he couldn’t muster the proper level of emotion. He loved you. He loved you dearly, and that was the problem. You had somehow wormed your way into his heart. You were so sweet to him the day the two of you met. He’d been injured and you showed up out of nowhere wanting to help him. He shooed you away, his pride and distrust of other people preventing him from accepting help from anyone. You insisted and he bellowed at you, demanding that you leave him alone and mind your own business. You started bawling then, not because of him yelling at you, but because, in your own words, 

“I can’t bear to leave you like this! You’re bleeding so badly! Please, please let me help you!” 

He sneered at you telling you to just shut up and aid him then. Anything to stop your infernal squalling. How your demeanor changed. You were so happy that you’d been allowed to help him, smiling sweetly as you bandaged his arm. You looked so cute that he couldn't stand to look at your face. You didn’t ask him questions about how he got injured or pry into his personal affairs. Instead you talked about how you’d been a long time fan of his and had followed as many of his achievements as you could. You told him that this was the first time you’d been able to actually watch a race that he was in and you were so excited about that. 

Diego was used to having fans that adored and worshiped him, but you were something else. No other fan could point out maneuvers that he used to achieve his victories, but you did. You didn’t just adore him for his achievements alone, you actually studied his methods. You told him that you became a fan because you wanted to watch him succeed. Never in his life had Diego felt so… supported. Others had been lured to him for his looks, charm, and achievements alone, but you seemed drawn by merely adoration of him as a jockey and your joy at watching him win. 

It flustered him and he hated that. Diego Brando was the one that flustered, not the one who got flustered. 

How dare you make him feel like this…

Thereafter you became an absolute pest. He saw you nearly everywhere he went and he didn’t know how to feel about it. He jokingly accused you of stalking him and the shocked and ashamed look on your face had him laughing. Finally he had made you blush, and it was the loveliest sight he’d ever laid eyes on. You had him, fully and completely, and he found himself looking forward to seeing your excited face in the crowds. Seeing you like that, waving at him from among the rabble, it never failed to have him smiling. You were like a rare jewel shining through piles of trash. Your very presence made him feel uplifted. Even when he wasn’t doing well in the race, you were there to offer your support. 

“So what if you lost your place!” you said. “You’re Diego Brando! You’ll do what you have to to regain your spot in the race and gain five more places in the process! Nobody can keep you down!” 

Then you’d hold your little fist in the air and cheer and another crack would form in the shield that Diego had put around his heart. 

Some time after that, you confessed to Diego. You told him that you’d had a crush on him since you first saw his picture in the newspaper, but meeting him in real life and seeing his feats for yourself, actually getting to speak to him in person… it turned your crush into full blown love. Many women confessed their attraction to him before, but it was always limited to his looks or fame. Other than his mother, no one had ever said they loved him before. It shattered the shield around his heart completely and he went weak in the knees. 

He confessed his own love for you that day, unable to hold back his feelings anymore. He’d given up on ever feeling loved again after his mother’s death. He’d given up on love in general. Love was a weakness after all. It made people do foolish things. Made them sloppy and stupid. Love could destroy a person’s life. How he wished that he’d remembered all that later… when you betrayed him. 

It happened not long after he obtained Scary Monsters. He was so eager to go and show it to you. He longed to see your shocked face become an expression of amazement and adoration. He wanted to stand in place and watch as you marveled at his new power. He wanted to see the glimmer of tenderness in your eyes as you stroked his face and whispered words of encouragement. 

“Look at you, Diego! My God! You’re unstoppable now!” he imagined you saying. 

But you weren’t there. He couldn’t find you at the checkpoint. He searched the inns, saloons, shops of the town, but you were nowhere to be seen. He started asking the other racers if they’d seen you. No one seemed to know who he was talking about. Dread filled his heart to bursting. Where were you? Had something happened? Were you ill? Injured? Lost? Had someone done something to you? He’d bloody murder anyone that laid a hand on you!! Desperate, he started asking the townsfolk in hopes that one of them knew something. Fortunately, most of them seemed to know who you were, but the looks they exchanged with each other when Diego mentioned your name told him that something was wrong. Very wrong. 

The townsfolk had a very interesting story to tell about you. Con-artist. That was the word they used to describe you. They told him about all the other men that you had warmed up to, how they all found themselves in the same predicament he was in. They told him about how you would seek out wealthy, famous, desirable men and make them fall for you. Then, when they least expected it, you would rob them and leave them with empty wallets and broken hearts. Diego could have massacred the entire town right then and there. He didn’t want to believe that they were talking about you. Not his sweet, innocent darling! Not the angel that was always there for him, uplifting him, encouraging him, loving him… He wouldn’t believe it. He couldn’t believe it. He ran back to his hotel room and searched through his belongings. It wasn’t true! You wouldn’t do that to him! Not to him! 

Half of his money was missing along with the necklace that he’d bought for you. You’d been kind enough, at least, not to rob him completely blind. How had he not noticed that his money bag was lighter than usual? When did you even have time to do this? You must’ve snuck into his room when he was practically tearing the town apart looking for you. You must have been lying in wait, watching for the moment that he left his room so that you could slip in and help yourself to what didn’t belong to you. Diego searched his bag again, hoping beyond hope that he’d just miscounted his cash and misplaced the necklace… and he found the cute little message you’d left for him,

“It’s been fun, Diego, but I’m afraid it’s time for me to head out. No hard feelings, handsome! Don’t be too mad at me!” 

It felt like the room had fallen away, leaving him in a black void and the only thing he could see was the letter he clutched in his trembling hands. His mind was racing with all manner of dark and murderous thoughts. It had all been a lie, a cruel, hateful lie! He never meant anything to you at all. He was just another mark for you, wasn’t he? Another notch in your damned belt! He should have known. He should have been able to see through your act. He’d imagined you to be some kind of jewel amongst filth, but he forgot that ALL humans were filth! Well you certainly reminded him of that, didn’t you? Diego’s fury-fogged gaze dropped to the bottom of the letter where you had the utter nerve to leave a mocking lipstick print on the paper. 

You sealed your fate with that little stunt. 

Diego held the note close to his face and breathed deep of your scent. He hadn’t fully grasped all of Scary Monsters abilities just yet, but he did know how to utilize its heightened sense of smell. He could smell the oil in your lipstick and the hint of your breath still lingering on the paper. You’d had tea instead of coffee that morning. He also caught a whiff of your perfume. It was the one that he’d bought you, imported from France and very expensive. At the time he thought you were worth it…

…Your scent was fresh. Very fresh. You were still in town. You hadn’t left yet. 

Diego slammed the door to his hotel room open, startling a young woman with a cart full of food trays. He sniffed at the air frantically, looking for all the world like a wild dog on the hunt. The woman started to speak to him, to ask him if he needed anything, but when he turned his yellow-eyed gaze on her, the words caught in her throat and she could only let out a tiny peep of surprise. His expression was that of a feral beast and he was panting ragged breaths as if he’d been running for miles. He sniffed the air a few more times before rushing past her. The woman pressed herself against the wall, barely avoiding being knocked down as he rushed down the corridor. She stared after him in confusion. She recognized him of course. Most of the hotel girls knew of the famed Diego Brando, but she was fairly certain that his eyes weren’t yellow. 

Was it even possible for humans to have yellow eyes? 

-----------------

You sighed as you climbed into the stagecoach that was to take you out of town. You felt a little guilty, you had to admit. Diego seemed so enamored with you, much more so than you expected of him. Watching his haughty, bitter demeanor melt into something soft and loving kinda had your heart pounding. It was a shame you just didn’t feel the same way. You would never forget that story he told you about his mother. You really wished that he’d never opened up that much to you. Poor Diego. He would be devastated at your betrayal, no doubt. Knowing that would eat you up inside, but you were sure that the fat stack hidden in your bag would ease your heartache. 

“Hello, dearie.” 

You were not expecting to ever hear that voice again. You looked up to see Diego staring at you with a blank expression from the seat across from you. When did he get into the stagecoach with you? Was he already in there waiting for you? 

“Diego!” you said with a start. 

“I got your note,” he said, holding up the note you’d left him and giving you a joyless smile. “I couldn’t let you leave without saying goodbye in person.” 

Your eyes darted around the inside of the coach, looking for anything you could use to bend the situation into your favor. Diego kept talking. 

“I was so worried about you, sweetheart.” he said with a mock pout. “I couldn’t find you anywhere. I was afraid something awful happened to you.” 

Your eyes fell on the bandages on the sides of his face. Was he injured? It didn’t matter. It was something you could use. Show him sympathy. Make him forget his anger and remember how good your hands felt against the skin of his face. That’s usually all it took for most. 

“Diego, what are those bandages for? Did you hurt yourself?” you said, giving him a pitiful look of concern. 

You reached up to him, hands coming up to touch the bandages. Your fingers had barely grazed the gauze of each bandage before Diego uttered an inhuman growl, 

“Keep your filthy, thieving little rat claws to yourself!” 

You pulled your hands back as if he’d tried to bite you, and held your arms to your chest to protect them. 

“Diego, please, you don’t understand…” you began but he sharply cut you off. 

“Oh, yes. Let’s hear it! Tell me all about what I don’t understand! What sob story will it be this time? Will it be the one about your dying aunt who was like a mother to you? Will it be about how you want to pay off your father’s gambling debts? Or will it be the one about you needing money to send your younger siblings to school? Or maybe it will be the one about buying shoes for orphans? Does that cover everything or will I be getting a new story this time?”  

You gave him a pleading look and tried to think of something, anything to tell him. You didn’t know what to do or say. Most of your victims were too busy wallowing in heartbreak to bother confronting you. Diego was the only one that went so far as to track you down. It was unexpected, but it wasn’t a scenario that you were completely unprepared for. 

“Floyd, Fleetwood, The Allman Brothers, Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young…” he listed off the names of some of your previous victims. “Do those names ring any bells? Including me, was that the full list of your targets or am I missing some?” 

He was, actually. He left out Morrison and Dylan, but you weren’t about to correct him. While he fumed you reached into the hidden pocket on the inside of your shawl and grasped the grip of your pistol. 

“How did it feel to know that you got one over on the great Diego Brando?” he asked. “Did it give you a little thrill? Did it give you your adrenaline fix? Did you have a laugh or two at my expense?” 

“Diego, please. I wouldn’t have done it if I hadn’t needed the money!” You pleaded in a last ditch effort to sway him. “I’ve fallen on hard times!” 

“Hard times?” Diego scoffed. “I doubt that you’ve experienced any hardship more serious than deciding what to have for breakfast in the morning!” 

His eyes darted to your throat for some reason. He thought he saw movement there but he wasn’t sure. He tried to focus his blurred vision on the glimmer of something around your throat. Ah. You were wearing the necklace he bought for you. He smiled bitterly at the sight of it. 

“The necklace looks lovely on you, dear. I was trying to keep it a secret from you until I was ready to give it to you, but it seems you’ve gone and spoiled the surprise. It goes well with that new outfit though. Blue was always your color. Tell me, did you buy that with my money?” 

You drew your pistol and aimed it at his chest. 

Diego’s instincts kicked in at the sudden movement. He saw something shiny in your hand, but couldn’t quite make out what it was. Though that newly awakened, primitive side of his brain was screaming at him that what you held in your hand was a weapon and he was in danger. 

You didn’t want to do it, but he’d cornered you, and cornered rats have a tendency to bite. You barely had time to cock the gun before Diego slapped it out of your hand with a speed you hadn’t expected from a human being. The gun flew out of the window of the coach and you heard it clatter against the ground a moment later. It’s a wonder it hadn’t gone off. The state of your gun was the least of your worries as Diego swung backwards with the same hand that had knocked the gun out of your hand and backhanded you across the face. You let out a yelp of pain and shock and shrank in on yourself, curling up in the seat and shielding your head with your arms. You could feel your hair dangling down in your face. Diego had slapped you so hard that your hair came undone. You could feel blood trickling out of one of your nostrils and you really hoped he hadn’t broken your nose. Your face stung like hell. 

You felt yourself being grabbed by the shoulders. You shrieked as Diego yanked you up to face him, pulling you out of your protective ball. 

“D-Diego! Please! Don’t h-hurt me!” you begged. 

“Hurt you?” Diego said, voice suddenly sounding deep and distorted. “Hurt you? After what you did to me, I should KILL YOU!!” 

His voice came out in a roar that shook the coach and vibrated throughout your entire body. 

You were crying now, sobbing and pleading for him not to kill you. Diego just stared at you with wild eyes. The color of his eyes seemed off and his pupils looked odd. You don’t know if what you were seeing was the result of the abject terror that Diego had instilled in you or if there was something strange going on with his face. The corners of his mouth seemed to shift under the bandages and stretch up the side of his face far further than they should go. His lips, and patches of skin around his face and neck seemed oddly scaly. And his teeth… Why did they look so long and sharp? 

“W-what’s happening to y-you?” you asked. 

He didn’t answer your question. He was too busy panting like an animal and being hypnotized by the trickle of blood coming from your nose. 

“Does it make you feel accomplished, knowing you humiliated me like that? I can practically hear everyone laughing at me behind my back. How they’ll look at me when I pass by and whisper to each other about how I fell prey to a con-artist and then they’ll snicker like schoolchildren. I won’t allow it. Do you hear? I won’t allow you to add me to your lists of conquests! You won’t place me on your trophy shelf! What’s worse is that you have the nerve to pull a gun on me! Were you thinking of adding murder to your list of crimes? I’ll kill you first! Love, you have no idea how hard it is for me to keep myself from biting your pretty head off…” 

You sobbed as you listened to his mad rant and watched at his face and body continued to contort into something monstrous. 

“Please don’t kill me…” you sobbed. 

Your plea seemed to snap him out of whatever daze he was in and his eyes lifted from the trail of blood from your nose to your tear-filled eyes. 

“I can’t…” he whispered. “I should. Believe me I’m angry enough… but I don’t think I could ever live with myself if I ripped you apart like I want to. And prison’s too good for you. You wouldn’t stay there long anyway. You’d just flutter your lashes at the nearest gullible guard and you’d be back on the streets in no time without ever going to trial. Isn’t that right?” 

“Diego… you’re hurting me…” you said in a pained gasp. He was gripping your shoulders so hard. 

“Oh poor thing.” He mocked. “Well you hurt me first, you lying, conniving little harlot and, believe me, you’ll pay for it! I’m not letting you go… I still want you. Damn my own foolish heart, I still want you. So you’re going to stick by me just like you used to. But you’re not getting out of your punishment. As much as I love you, I won’t let you get away with what you did to me. I want you at every checkpoint singing my praises louder than ever before. I want you throwing yourself at my feet even if it means kneeling in filth. I want you to do it where everyone can see you, so you can see what it feels like to have everyone laughing at you. You’ll be at my beck and call, my personal servant. If I can’t have you as my lover, then you’ll be my dog! You’ll grovel before me, beg for my attention, and my kindness, and I’ll give you none of it until I think you’ve earned it! That’s right, there will be no more perfumes, jewelry, or fancy clothes for you. From now on you’ll have to earn that, too. I’ll show you exactly what it means to fall on hard times!” 

This couldn’t be happening! Not to you! You were supposed to be on your way to the next town and the next poor sap to con. You weren’t supposed to be here now in the clutches of a madman who seemed to be turning into a monster. 

“Don’t think for a minute that you can run either.” Diego continued. “Try to escape and I’ll find you. I’ll hunt you down just like I did today, only when I find you again I will kill you! I’ll kill you and anyone you try to get help from.” 

“Please, Diego,” you sobbed. “I can pay the money back! I can--!” 

“This isn’t about the damned money!” he thundered. 

You cringed at his tone, afraid that he’d hit you again. 

“I can make it up to you! Please, Diego! I’ll do anything!” you said, hoping beyond hope that he would listen to reason. 

Diego grinned revealing rows of jagged, animalistic teeth. You just stared at them, unable to believe what you were seeing. 

“Good. Glad to hear it.” he sneered. “You can start by giving me a little kiss.” 

You stared warily at his mouth and wondered if he could actually bite off your head, like he’d suggested before. 

“Well?” Diego growled, impatient with your hesitation. 

You leaned forward and planted your trembling lips against his. The skin there felt rough and leathery. You didn’t have time to think about it as Diego abruptly dragged his tongue across your face, lapping up the blood from your nose. You groaned in disgust and Diego chuckled. 

“Again. Kiss me again and this time do it like you bloody mean it!” 

You obliged, pressing your lips against his and his mouth all but engulfed you as he turned the simple kiss into a full on make out session. You whimpered pathetically the entire time. 

Diego pulled away, his face back to normal. 

“Well, that’s a start.” he quipped. 

------

Diego walked out of the stable after putting Silver Bullet away. Like clockwork, you shoved your way out of the crowd and landed on your knees at Diego’s feet. He turned, giving you a blank look. You didn’t look up. You didn’t want to see that triumphant look in his eyes. You also didn’t want to see the looks of disgust and pity on the faces of the crowd. It was bad enough that you could hear the things they were saying about you. 

Pathetic.

Desperate. 

Filthy.

Annoying. 

At every checkpoint, Diego had you playing the part of his pitiful little fan that followed him everywhere he went, desperately seeking his attention. It was beyond humiliating, but you didn’t have a choice in the matter. Diego warned you that if you wanted to eat today, you’d better put on a good show like the obedient little dog you were. 

“You were wonderful out there today, Diego!” you said, using the tone you’d always used on him back when you were trying to win him over. 

Laughter erupted from the crowd and your face heated up. You lowered your gaze even further so that you were staring at the mud that stained your knees. Diego ignored the crowd and tenderly grasped one of your hands. He pulled you up from the dirt, earning a murmur of adoration. 

How kind he was to give that filthy street walker even a modicum of his time. 

“You don’t look like you’ve eaten in a while,” He said in a soft tone that had tears forming in the corners of your eyes. 

He was horrible. The living definition of a monster. How could anyone buy into this act of fake kindness he was putting on? He used a thumb to wipe the tears from your eyes, smearing some of the caked up dirt on your cheeks. 

“Don’t cry, now. Let’s get you fed.” 

He pulled you along and you followed behind him, head lowered. Diego had ruined you. The days of holding your head high were long over. You would never get your dignity back after this. The only thing that concerned you now is whether or not Diego would let you sleep in a hotel room or stick you in the stables tonight.

[abbacchiosbelt]

M-2 for Johnny Joestar?

CW for yandere content, manipulation, mention of misogynistic behavior, and allusions to violence. 18+ only.

Prompt: “If you leave me now I’ll die. I can’t survive without you.” 

It hadn't been a mistake to participate in the Steel Ball Run. The money, even outside of first place, would have been life-changing. It had been a mistake, though, to ride alongside Johnny Joestar and Gyro Zeppeli. The two of them attracted trouble like nothing else, and you were forced to become tangled up in their web.

It was you who they turned to after another fight to patch up their wounds. It was you who fielded their fighting and complaining. Despite how much you took care of them, they showed you little respect. Gyro brushed aside your knowledge and would often imply you were the reason for their bad luck... But if you tried to set off on your own, Johnny would beg and plead for you to stay. He'd tell you that Gyro really did appreciate you, and like a fool, you'd believe him. They took advantage of your kindness and used the harsh nature of the race to goad you into staying.

You stayed, then. Convinced yourself that they were right and that their protection was a reward for you taking care of them even though they were perfectly capable of doing it themselves.

You stayed with them and watched Gyro die; watched as Johnny killed Funny Valentine and protected Lucy Steel. You watched, too, as your chance at winning whilst Johnny fought for his life. You don't know why you stayed... you could have taken off in the confusion. Could have potentially placed in the Top 5, but instead, you'd followed Johnny to the end.

You'd followed him home at his request, waiting for him while he returned Gyro to his homeland.

And here you were, 2 months after Johnny had returned. You were standing above your bed, frozen, with your suitcase open in front of you.

Johnny was standing just inside the doorframe, his grip on his cane white-knuckled. His pale, freckled cheeks were flushed pink with frustration, and his lips were downturned into a pout you'd grown very used to.

He'd caught you trying to leave.

"Going somewhere?" Johnny's voice is cold when he speaks. It scared you, honestly, how cool and collected he was when he was angry. You would have liked it more if he had pleaded and cried, but this... This was scary. He takes a step forward, cane tapping against the floor, and you flinch. Johnny scoffs. "Really? Scared a'me?"

You turn to face him, your lips were drawn in a tight line across your face. "No," you lie. "Just startled me. I thought you would be too tired for the cane today." Johnny had been able to regain some strength after the 'miracle' at the end of the race he refused to elaborate about. He'd go until he was tired, though, and you'd encouraged him to use his chair if he needed it. Pride kept him from taking care of himself, and he expected you to keep an eye on him instead.

"Nah." Johnny steps forward until he's directly next to you. Without a word, he sits next to your suitcase on the bed and begins to take what clothes you'd managed to pack out one by one.

His silence unnerves you.

"Johnny, it's not what you think." You start, knowing it was a lie. "I just... I want to see my family. It's been over a year now." You pause, and then continue, hoping to appeal to him. "I need to see them. You get it, right?"

Johnny freezes and slowly turns his head to look at you. "Is that so?" He stares at you and narrows his eyes. "Did you forget? I'm your family now. If you went..." Johnny's expression turns from anger to sorrow. "I'd be all alone again."

"Johnny..." You call his name softly. You knew what he was doing, but you felt powerless to stop it. "I'd come back." Another lie. "It'd just be for a week or so."

It'd be permanent.

Johnny gives you a long, hard look before he stands from the bed. He wraps his arms around your waist and forces you to sit on the bed, stepping in between your legs so he can look down at you. He holds your gaze until you avert your eyes, anxious.

"Look at me." Johnny says. He brings one of his hands up to cup your cheek, calloused fingertips skimming across your skin. There's a look in his eyes now that you can't quite place, and somehow, they look different. "If you leave me now, I'll die. I can't survive without you."

Your stomach drops. Johnny had said many things... but he'd never threatened that. You feel frozen under his touch, his thumb stroking soft lines across your cheek. "I... Johnny..." You struggle with your words, unsure of what to say. What could you say?

"All I need 'ta hear is that you won't leave me." Johhny brings up his other hand so that your face is cupped on both sides. It feels patronizing. "You're not going to go now, right?" Johnny pinches your cheeks and grins. His sudden shift in mood meant that he knew he'd already won. Of course you wouldn't go. How could you, after that?

"I won't leave you." You affirm, leaning away from his touch. Johnny drops his hands from your face and instead sits back on the bed, his body pressed up against yours. His arm comes to wrap around your shoulder, and you're suddenly reminded of the preternatural strength you'd seen from him more than once. A chill runs down your spine. Would he ever hurt you...? You swallow, your throat suddenly dry, and add, "I'm not going to go."

Johnny sighs in contentment, accepting your answer. The arm around you squeezes gently as he leans in to lay his head against your shoulder.

"Glad ya know you're all mine."

[dollface-yandere]

"only one bed?" you're kidding."

yandere! diego brando x reader

warning; non-consensual touching, yandere and dark themes, suggestive touch, blackmailing, inappropriate use of stand, probably ooc, scratching, kicking

prompt; you stop at a hotel for rest before the next segment of the race. unfortunately; there's only one bed, and you really, really hate the man you're forced to travel with.

"that'll be.." the receptionist at the hotel paused to look you in the eyes. "oh, could i ask real quick? the sign outside says the competitors from the race are allowed free lodging.. that is still a thing, no?"

diego put one hand on his hip and turned his heel, his other arm reaching for his pockets. you stood anxiously next to him, teetering up and down on your toes waiting for the lady to assign you a room and give you the key.

you kept yourself reminded of how he treated you earlier that day. the toe of his leather boots roughly dug into your cheek, rubbing a combination of dirt, sand, and gravel into your face while his other foot weighed down on your back to prevent you from standing back up.

his rough voice quieted down for that moment. he removed his foot from your back, kneeling down to your eye level, grabbing a fistful of your hair and pulling your face up. he brought dry lips to your ear, keeping his voice low so that if anybody did find you two, nobody'd see.

your eyes widened while he whispered in your ear your biggest secret that you hadn't told any other racers. you still don't know how he found out. was he spying on you the previous night? or did he pay someone to figure it out and tell him?

the receptionist's voice seemed to have brought you back out of your trance. "my apologies, i should have known you were racers! theres one last room, it should be a double bed. the number is 115, on the third floor. and, here are your keys."

she stuck out her hand, holding a keyring with a singluar key on it. the key appeared gold with the numbers "115" engraved into the dirty, worn brass.

with each step up the stairs, you felt uneasy. all you wanted was to get a room and get to bed. diego took his sweet time unlocking the door, too. after what felt like 5 minutes, you sighed in relief, even if it only took one minute. you and diego entered the room. everything was perfectly decorated and pristine. one slight issue; there was only one bed.

"no goddamn way," you huffed out and paused, dropping your belongings on the floor by your feet, "no way am i sharing a bed with you."

there must have been a mix-up. the lady downstairs said there was only one room left with two beds. it appears she was wrong, because you and diego stood before a hotel room with not two, but one single bed. the registration counter was closed now, you were lucky enough to get a room before she closed up for the night.

now, it's 10:34pm. you've been arguing back and forth with diego about sleeping arrangements for 2 minutes now. "i'm not gonna share a bed with you. horses will fly before i lay next to your stupid ass."

after arguing and arguing, you found yourself lying on your side facing the wall, while diego stared up at the ceiling. you could feel him shift positions. "what are you doing? just go to bed." a hand with.. what felt like much longer nails than diego had, rested on your waist, moving up and down your sides.

"don't be like that." he trailed his hand up your body for another minute until you had enough. "damn it, stop that! i can't sleep with you doing.." your voice stopped suddenly after you turned around.

he looked.. different. his nails were more like sharp claws, his tongue was unusally long, and a bandage peeled off his face to reveal a long slit from his mouth through half of his cheek. sharp teeth replaced his usual straight, normal teeth.

"what's the matter? i thought you wanted to sleep." diego smirked with confidence while he placed another hand on your shoulder, his claws scratching into your skin while you stared in horror.

[urfaveisayandere]

Gyro Zepelli from Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure: Steel Ball Run is a yandere!

Requested by anonymous!

[the-illiterate-pirate]

JoJo Masterlist

* = Nsfw

° = Angst

× = Yandere

≈ = Family fic

© = Crack fic

Robert Speedwagon

• If I Was Your Vampire

Dio Brando

• In Due Time°

• Shame on the Night*

Joseph Joestar

• In-A-Godda-Da-Vidda°

Caesar Zeppeli

• In-A-Godda-Da-Vidda°

Pillarmen

• Pillow Talk

• Coddling Santana and Wamuu (HCs)

• Pillarmen with a child "hostage" (HCs)

Wamuu

• Love Machine*

Crusaders

• Them falling in love (HCs)

• Singing "Tequila" on karaoke night (HCs)

Jotaro Kujo

• One Shot, 2 Shot ©

• Bring on the Night*

• Feel Good Inc.

Mohammed Avdol

• Burnin' for You

Terence D'Arby

• Holding on to You*

Josuke Higashikata

• Don't Stop Me Now

Rohan Kishibe

• Finding out their S/o is pregnant (HCs)

Akira Otoishi

• Pepper

Hayato Kawajiri

• A Little Bit Off Today ≈

Yoshikage Kira

• Beggin'*

• Modern Love*

Guido Mista

• Looking for a Kiss*

La Squadra

• Japanese Mythology HCs

• Seducing La Squadra* (HCs)

• NSFW headcanons*

• No Rest for the Wicked AU HCs

Melone

• Him with your pet tortoise (HCs)

Diavolo / Vinegar Doppio

• Head Like a Hole, Ch. 1

Weather Report

• Selkie out of Water, Ch. 1 || Ch. 2 || Ch. 3 || Ch. 4

• Dancing in the Moonlight

• Canned Heat

• Electric Love ×

• Dad Report ≈

• Dreams of a Samurai*

• Cold as Ice

• What's New Pussycat*

• Finding out their S/o is pregnant (HCs)

• S/o is on their period (HCs)

Emporio Alnino

• Thank You (for sending me an angel) ≈

Narciso Anasui

• Dating HCs

• S/o is on their period (HCs)

Jotaro Kujo

• Drive*

Enrico Pucci

• Fallen Angel*

• Lady in Red*

• My Light*

• Saints an' Sinners*

• Take Me to Church*

• That's Life

• Finding out their S/o is pregnant (HCs)

• S/o on their period (HCs)

Johngali A.

• White Room*

Thunder McQueen

• SFW & NSFW HCs*

• (You) Shook Me All Night Long*

D an G

• SFW & NSFW HCs*

Donatello Versace

• To Heal*

Perla Pucci

• General platonic HCs

Gyro Zeppeli

• Hayloft*

• Hayloft II*

• Kickstart My Heart*

• Whole Lotta Love*

Diego Brando

• Moonage Daydream*

Sandman

• Tell Him That His Lonesome Nights Are Over, Pt. 1 || Pt. 2*

Mountain Tim

• Save a Horse (Ride a Cowboy)*

Funny Valentine

• Cupid's Chokehold ×

Oyecomova

• Oye Cómo Va*

Blackmore

• I Surrender*

• Twisted Nerve ch. 1

D-I-S-C-O

• Dating HCs*

Josefumi Kujo

• Dating HCs (Ft. Kira)

Jobin Higashikata

• Hard Lovin' Man*

Aisho Dainenjiyama

• Keep On Loving You

Tooru

• Can't Help Falling in Love

• Bad Case of Lovin' You

• Tooru HCs* (SFW and NSFW)

• Yan!Tooru HCs*

• Doctor play with Tooru* (HCs)

• Tooru x Nurse!reader*

Paco Lovelantes

• Good Old-fashioned Lover Boy

[ravenzeppeli]

Pissed Off |Yandere Diego Brando x Reader|

Warning: strong language, spanking/whipping, nudity, sexual remarks, yandere. MA.

         The room was silent, so silent that you felt yourself growing extremely uncomfortable as Diego’s cyan eyes stared into your soul. His eyes were hard, hands balled into fists at his side. He stood across from you, the unmade queen size bed that the two of you shared behind him. He was pissed, his fists beginning to shake - you couldn’t help but look away, feeling as if you’ve crossed a serious line in your relationship.

         Suddenly, the silence was broken by a laugh - his laugh was dry, loud, his beaming laugh echoing off of the thin eggshell painted walls. “It’s funny how you always test me, so funny!” He exclaimed suddenly, the sudden base in voice causing you to flinch. “Why don’t you come over here? Let me get a closer look at what my girlfriend decided to wear out without my knowledge!”

         You didn’t move. You didn’t want to move towards him because you knew that he was upset. He was possessive - not only did you leave without telling him, but you also were wearing tight pants and a shirt that was showing a little too much cleavage. In your defense, you didn’t know that he would be coming home early today.. he came home three hours earlier today, something that he never does.

        “I paid people to watch you. The funny thing is that you do this at least three times a week. You could go out with me - when I get home I would love to go anywhere you’d like!” He exclaimed even louder, his bare feet padding against the hardwood floor, coming towards you. “You didn’t even cover yourself up. You just let men stare at your ripe breasts on full display because that corset is definitely doing it’s job!” His voice switched, thick bitterness now coating his tone as he stood in front of you, looking directly at you. “Anything you want to say to me, my girlfriend?”

         You let your head raise, his face inches away from yours - Diego wasn’t an extremely tall or buff man, but he was still just as intimidating, maybe even more so. “I’m sorry, Diego, I wasn’t doing anything wrong, though! I was just going on walks, nothing more than that, I swear to you.” You weren’t running around cheating. You just wanted peace. Time out of this house.. was that so wrong?

         He shrugged his shoulders, “do you think that I care? You broke my rules. That’s what I care about. And you know what I gotta do when you break the rules, don’t ya?” He questioned, his hands lowering, and you heard it.. you heard that damned doing, him unfastening his thick leather belt. Fuck.. could you avoid this? Shit, you kind of liked it when he spanked you. It was nice having someone in control of your life for you.

        “You spank me when I break the rules, but can’t I get a warning?” You questioned, getting a scoff in response, his belt being pulled from its loops, the leather gently hitting your leg. “How about I spank you for being an annoying boyfriend? How would you like that, bitch?” You snapped suddenly, being offended by his scoff but you already regretted what you said by the sudden stiffness that formed in his body, his hands folding the belt in half, smacking your clothed behind with one swift smack, causing you to crash into him, a pained groan escaping your lips. “Ow, I’m sorry alright?!” You cried, only because you knew that you fucked up bad.

          His other hand fiddled with your pants button, snatching your pants down, revealing that you weren’t wearing any underwear. “Is this some kind of joke?! Why aren’t you wearing any undergarments?!” He snapped at you, grabbing you by your waist and dragging you over to the bed. “I’m going to beat your ass, that’s it! You are going to get it proper, you disrespect strumpet!” He threw you on the bed, and before you could even position yourself, he let you have it - and he let you have it good. He was going to make sure that his anger was felt.

           The belt violent cracked down on your bare bottom, landing in the center of your ass and making a loud pop sound when it met your skin, and you couldn’t help but to let a loud gasp escape your lips. It hurt - he always warmed you up before he stared so you weren’t used to such brutality. The second hit came crashing in the same spot, and you let your hands shoot behind your bottom, protecting the newly bruising area from his harsh blows. “P-please, w-wait!” You cried out, your hands rubbing at your flesh- ow, your cool touch only made it sting worse.

         “Oh no the fuck you don’t,” he snapped, his other hand grabbing your wrists and pinning them behind your back. “Don’t you make me tie you up and wet your bottom, I can make this punishment much worse then it already is if you don’t obey me! You knew that you would get in trouble!” The belt crashed down on the same area twice, causing tears to practically spill from your eyes.

        You blinked roughly, the salt from your tears stinging your eyes, but that was the least of your worries. You felt it - a purple bruise forming on your ass. It hurt. It hurt so bad that you immediately regretted testing him. “P-please, I’ll.. I’ll listen!” You cried out, a choked sob escaping your lips when the belt crashed down on the area just below the bruise twice, leaving behind a string just as severe. “It hurts, please!”

        “You damn right you’ll listen, sneaking around for two months behind my back deserves a punishment like this!” He screamed, landing a sharp smack on your sit spot, your body jerking up from the pain. “You promised me that you weren’t sneaking off, you lied to my face for two months! I waited for you to be honest, but you never were, so now I’m going to bruise your ass up like I never have before!” Two more smacks were landed on the sit spots, each one harder than the last.

          You felt as if you were going to go mad - this wasn’t the spankings that you were use too, he was never this hard! You didn’t like this, but you weren’t supposed to.. this was a punishment, an actual punishment that really fucking hurt. “I’m sorry that I lied, I’ll never lie to you again Diego!” You told him, and you meant that.. you didn’t like being punished so harshly but he did warn you.. you should have listened to his warnings.

          “Don’t worry, my lovely, I know that you won’t! If you do, a fresh switch will be going on your wet bottom, and I’ll do it right on the front porch so that the neighborhood sees! I’ll strip you naked and let them watch, make sure the husbands bring their wives so they learn to listen!” Diego screamed, the belt now covering every inch of your ass in a repeated motion - he just kept getting angrier. “You will know your place as my girlfriend, and you won’t leave without me! You won’t dress improperly!”

        You wiggled violently against his grip, but he was stronger than you. It was like he had some other force working with him to keep you down. “Okay, okay!” You cried out, kicking your legs, making sure that out didn’t accidentally kick him because then all hell would break loose. “It hurts, my ass hurts! I can’t take it, I’ll be good! I WILL LISTEN!” You screamed, and with that, you heard the belt drop. Good.. it was over, but he wasn’t moving. You had a bad feeling suddenly..

            

            “I will not be lied to anymore.. I refuse to allow it.” Suddenly, his palm crashed down on your raw and sore ass with all off his strength, a loud pop sound filling the air. No.. no more, you began to sob, words not being able to come out of your mouth. “I love you, and I will protect you.. from you. I deserve a thank you for punishing you, don’t you think?” He questioned, letting his palm crash into your left cheek, the pain causing your entire body to have a severe shake.

         You couldn’t fight back. You had to give him exactly what he wanted. You knew he was crazy going into this, so this was your burden to carry. You loved him, and because you loved him as much as you did, you found yourself obeying him. “T-thank you for punishing me! I-I love you too, I’m so sorry, Diego!” You showing thanks sounded more like begging. You just wanted him to stop.

          His hand crashed against your backside once more before another laugh escaped his lips. He landed next to you, sitting down on the edge of the bed as he freed your arms. He leaned down, placing a kiss on your lips. “Perfect, now get up and stand in front of me. Have your bare bottom facing me - I’m not done with you yet. After spankings come time outs.”

       You listened, quickly standing up and walking in front of him. You were quick to turn your back to him, not wanting him to see your face anymore due to how badly you were sobbing.. and this just made it worse because it wasn’t over yet. Why couldn’t it just be over?

         “Bend over and put your hands on your knees, I want to sit here and stare at your naked bottom. I also see that your pussy is wet, I’ll have a good view of that too as you’re bent over. You know I like this punishment the most.. so go ahead and bend over for me,” Diego told you, his hand smacking your left cheek. “You’re so cute.. thinking you could get away with lying to me. I bet the thought of lying will never cross your pretty little mind again.”

         You bent yourself over, placing your hands on your knees and closing your eyes. You had a long and humiliating night ahead of you.. Diego was on a warpath and you were the only thing in his path. You and your lies, you definitely wouldn’t be lying to him ever again. You would listen to him, and you would avoid these situations.. but were they unavoidable? You didn’t know.. but you had a bad feeling.

[thatonegirl322]

A yandere Gyro and Johnny pairing fighting off a yandere Diego and Hotpants or maybe Valentine?

IM SORRY I TOOK SO LONG I HAD NO IDEA WHAT TO DO WITH THIS.

' = thoughts

" = speech

-----------------------------------------------

As Y/n walks in a old 1800's western styled town she questioned her life and why she's still a big jojo fan.

Y/n plops down on the sandy ground and sighs.

" I'm tired of having to walk a mile, Im just gonna rest for a little while"

1 minute

2 minutes

3 minutes

" NOTHINGS HAPPENING IM SO BOR- is that a tumble weed!"

Y/n runs up to the mini sized tumble weed and grins.

" I've always wanted to throw a tumble weed at someone!"

Y/n grabs the tumble weed and puts it in her bag that she conveniently has on her.

' Welp, I guess it's time to walk until something interesting happens.... again'

Y/n gets up and pats off sand off her sweat pants.

' I wish I had my phone and some headphones'

" Darling? Is that you?"

' Oh shit it's the zesty ball cowboy, don't look behind you y/n, don't look-'

" Ummm no this is Tyrone" Y/n says in the deepest voice she can muster.

A different voice cuts in

" Y/n get on one of our horses now"

' That's definitely Johnny I can recognize that painfully blunt voice from anywhere'

" M-kay'"

I turn around and walk torwards them.

"Which horse should I get on?"

" Mine!" Gyro says.

" Wait what? She always goes on your horse Gyro it's my turn now"

' You know what since Johnny has a big ass- uhhhh i mean nice personality I'll ride with him'

" I'll ride with you this time Johnny" Y/n says as she smiles

" WHAT!?" Gyro exclaims doing his cursed shocked face.

I walk to Johnny's horse and after two embarrassing tries I get on behind him.

I wrap my arms around Johnny just incase the horse hates me.

" Where are we even going?" Y/n asks

" Were going to continue the race"

" Wait- how far are you into the race!?-"

" Johnny and Gyro, I haven't seen you in a long time" Valentine says as he comes out a carriage 5 feet away from us.

' How did none of us hear that loud ass carriage' Y/n thinks

" Johnny, Gyro, I think we should leave he's way too American-"

Tusk Act 4 and Ball Breaker come out of there Users backs.

" Hiya" Y/n says as she waves to the cute stands.

They excitedly wave back

' Wahhh~ so cute!'

Funny slowly stride's torwards us

" Hand Y/n over please, if you do that I will spare you and you make have a chance of winning the race"

" I would appreciate if I had say in this please!" Y/n says as she deadpans.

" No! We're not handing her over to you, you bastard!" Johnny Yells

" Fine, be that way then" Funny replies as D4C comes out

" You know, I could just runaway and leave Valentine to chase me, Then you guys can finish the race without me nagging you"

" NO!" Gyro, Johnny both yell

" Fine then, I was just trying to help" Y/n says as she rolls her eyes

' No matter what Y/n I'll always be with you, even if I have to kill a few bastards to keep me with you" Johnny thinks as he Glares at Valentine

Johnny puts hand into a hand gun position and aims it at Valentine.

' I'll Die before I'll let anyone take you away from me, Y/n' Gyro thinks

Gyro takes out his steel ball and focuses on trying to find the golden ratio on Valentine.

" Don't worry I got this guys!"

Y/n opens her bag and takes the tumble weed out.

' A tumble weed......?' Johnny and Gyro both think.

Y/n throws the tumble weed at Funny. It lands directly on his and hits his eyes.

" Augh!-"

" GO BEFORE HE OPENS HIS EYES"

Johnny and Gyro quickly make there horses get away from Funny Valentine.

" HAHHA THATS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU GET FREAKY WITH LITTLE GIRLS LOSER"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

IM SORRY THIS WAS JUST SO RANDOM-

I hoped you guys liked this love ya'll!

[shineonyoucrazyyandere]

Bad Horsie - Yandere! Johnny Joestar x Reader x Yandere! Gyro Zeppeli

Reader’s horse has a stand and of course is protective of their owner, both Gyro and Johnny fume over this as this animal blocks them at every move. This was supposed to be a joke post for April fools awhile go, less comedic than I was intending so it’s not gonna be right on April fools. Horse’s name : Bastille

Stand : Bad Horsie (Namesake ; Steve Vai - Bad Horsie)

You and Bastille probably had one of the strongest bonds one could possibly have with each other. Even Mountain Tim himself made an observation of this, which made you proud. Your father had given him to you a few years prior to entering the Steel Ball Run. A horse that was supposedly stubborn with other riders, just happened to click with you. So, you made sure to treat him right, give him the love he deserved and the both of you could communicate with grace.

Something that came heavily in handy in this arduous journey across the United States. Though it wasn’t just the two of you alone not like you thought it would have been. You wished it was that way, but life had thrown you a terrifying hardball consisting of two racers. The British born Johnny Joestar and Italian Gyro Zeppeli, who you only had considered allies to get you through this disaster of a race.

Bastille was your rock keeping you sane around those two, their romantic interest suddenly blossoming in a hell-scape of stand users. Your lovely horse knew this, the nervousness in your heart as you handled the reigns. He’d always eyeball the two of them when they were camping down for the night or when you hit a checkpoint. So he made it known to you to give as much pets as you wanted.

However as the trek went on, the atmosphere became suffocating. Bastille could feel it even as the two of you kept in sync, trying your best to either ride behind or in front of those two men. As much as there was to worry about venomous snakes or other apex predators, they seemed easier to deal with in this scenario. Perhaps this horse couldn’t get the complete situation down, but if you were in danger it would help instinctively or otherwise.

You knew your lovely companion had a stand but never divulged this to the men you were traveling with. You felt rather guilty relying on your own horse for protection, but if he wanted to you knew there wasn’t stopping him. Just retroactively planning things carefully so you and him could cross that finish line.

While you tried to keep your distance from these two, as much as they would allow they would take advantage of this to talk about your horse. This was literally the only reason for the past few weeks that you managed to get any kind of break. They knew for certain your furry friend knew this even if you didn’t consciously realize.

“The way their horse acts it’s interesting isn’t it?” Gyro said breaking a small silence the two of them.

Johnny’s blue eyes glanced over briefly “It’s not too hard to differentiate, horses do have emotions but I can tell there’s something more to him”

Gyro nodded along “How long have you been suspecting him being something more?”

The blond admitted he couldn’t shake a certain feeling from the very start of the race. Gyro’s eyes in turn widened a bit before resettling.

“Tch…so I’ve been getting dirt flung in my face on purpose by that cheeky prick for a little while now” The male smirked with a small gleam of his teeth.

Joestar himself sighed, he was frustrated by Bastille himself. He never really counted on being on the defensive against a horse of all things. Considering they were chasing corpse parts, this should hardly be any surprise to either of them. Johnny would never hesitate in taking a humans life to keep you to himself, Your horse complicated things for the race at least.

“Think it has a stand?” Gyro tossed another question out “If he wants to protect them that bad, I can’t rule that out as an impossibility”

“Wouldn’t be surprised, y/n loves that horse to death and of course they wouldn’t bother telling us about it”

“Damn, that’s true…” He clicked his tongue in annoyance, not for the potential fact your horse could’ve helped during certain face offs. Or the fact it was only focused on you and vice versa stung his heart. You’re cute trying to hide everything from him and Johnny though. As for Bastille, he wasn’t about to let a damn horse of all things keep him away from his darling.

The two of them decided to stitch together a timeline of sorts of your mighty steed’s actions. Johnny recalling a few times during the night he’d see your horse move it’s pitch closer when it could tell when he was staring at you during the night. Not to mention the close proximity of blocking his view of you by the morning. Or it pulling back when if felt your discomfort at him getting close to you while running.

Biggest thing Johnny had happen to him was almost having his head crushed in. He’d admit he was being nosy in attempting to get a hold of a diary you had, just to see if you were trying to write something to a potential significant other. Which he’d promptly burn without care if you had one if he had actually gotten a hold of it.

Gyro on the other hand had as he said dirt flung in his face various times. The intense flirtatious comments he’d make occasionally would sometimes occur. Almost getting knocked off balance if you tensed up enough. Or his belongings on Valkyrie getting strewn about, to distract the Italian from being in your presence. Or somehow slipping into a waterhole even though he knew for certain he had good balance and grip.

Johnny wouldn’t lie, he kinda chuckled at that last one at the time.

In literally any normal scenario anyone would take a hint. But Johnny and Gyro didn’t quite see it as protecting you. They were pouncing for more attention from you than they already greedily lapped up.

That evening when you all decided to pitch up camp for the night however would unknowingly unravel everything.

That evening you were the one to start the fire, the wood and kindling already gathered. You felt nervous that you weren’t able to catch another respite from these two. Keeping you right in their line of sight. Sighing you informed Gyro the fire was ready and he decided to start dinner with steadfastness. However he insisted you help him this time around.

“You know, that horse of yours sure does love you” Gyro abruptly brought up while tending to cutting up something with his knife.

“uh yeah I’d think so?” You do your best to shrug off the comment

“Something seems interesting about yours behavior wise” He responded cryptically.

“What’s your point?”

A smirk rises on his face, his green eyes cutting into your own.

“I’m just saying your horse seems to act on things with purpose”

You could feel your heartbeat race a bit faster than usual, this wasn’t the first time but this was a little different. A snort came from the distance, Bastille looking to your eyes clearly disgruntled. Shortly after you saw Gyro pointing towards him.

“There’s only so many times something could be an accident, and you know it don’t you?”

You swallowed nervously when Gyro projected his voice a bit louder. You knew who he was referring to, and when his eyes settled down back to yours you went cold.

“It’s not very nice keeping things from your lovers you know” Your eyes darted over to Johnny whose own stare was ice cold.

“Now, I’m a little more forgiving than Johnny is…Bastille would probably be dead by now if we weren’t searching for the corpse parts or were in a race” Something you absolutely took to be true when you saw the blond facing down an enemy.

Out of the corner of your eye you saw something pierce the ground, causing Bastille to move erratically in dodging. Quickly rising to your feet to attempt to assist him. But the sensation of a steel ball on your leg made you twist in a way you never felt before. Gyro quickly sought to catch you and hold you back into his vice grip.

“Bastille stop! Stop!” You shouted as he stomped his hooves aggressively, knowing he would try to attack Johnny. Gyro too if he hadn’t been so preoccupied. It pained you to say such a thing when you knew for certain they started this on purpose.

“You could give it up all right now and try to fight Johnny and I off, abandon the race completely” The Italian man stated with smugness.

“But I’ll make sure you’re unable to run in anyway I can” He hummed “I can hurt you just enough that I need help you like I do Johnny~, but not enough to disqualify you from the race”

You bit your lip as he squeezed his arms closer around your body.

“So what’ll be? Can’t wait to hear your answer”

[princelylove]

some sbr (and phantom blood!) thoughts for you in general, your highness, if you'll take the words of this lowly peon-- i've been watching some documentaries on the gilded age recently, and a thought came up on me; how would the blorbos of the sbr and phantom blood era handle the societal expectations of the era? like, they can't really be affectionate or anything in public, so i feel like some of the pda/jealous ones would really struggle. plus, it would be inconvienent for them to talk to darling, especially because an engaged couple or even just two single people weren't really allowed to commune with eachother in private in anything other then social occasions. it's a fascinating dilemma, really, and i'd be fascinated to here about how some yanderes from this time period would handle this stuff. your ever faithful, ever loyal, ever miserable peon-- 🌸 anon

Warning for discussion of gender roles, brief homophobia mention I'm not sure if you can count it really, typical yandere things.

What a good ask, peon. When I think of the old American west, I tend to think of those old cowboy movies focusing on the wild west. What a wild three decades. 

We have to consider where exactly they are in the world, and their social standing. Frilly fan language means absolutely nothing to someone who grew up on the streets- Although Dio has studied aristocratic courting rituals religiously. England and the US are different culturally, and the south is very different from the west and north. 

The Gilded age takes place from 1877-1900-ish, doesn’t it? Steel Ball Run takes place right in the middle of that, starting in 1890 and ending a year later. I tend to think of the Steel Ball Run cast as living in the ‘wild west,’ which takes place generally from 1865 to 1895, so it’s perfectly lined up. Phantom Blood’s main story is in 1888, but considering it’s entirely in England, it would be considered late Victorian era rather than the Gilded age. The entire concept of a débutante is so horrifying in a yandere context. If I’m misremembering and the entire concept of presenting a young lady to society for the purpose of marrying her off is not in the late Victorian era, or any of the other information I just presented is incorrect, ignore the inaccuracy. Débutante is used in a gender neutral way here I pinky swear.

Jonathan takes the entire courting process very seriously. Not that he’s any good at formalities, but there’s an attempt. The concept of marriage being something romantic was very new in the Victorian period- but not a foreign concept to Jonathan in the slightest. He grew up with a loving family, his future spouse should be the love of his life. It was generally important to the male identity to be educated, do a sport, and be a gentleman- Jonathan fits every one of those requirements. By all means, he fits in. The only thing stopping him from never getting a second glance is how eager he is to please his darling. “It’s odd how that boy follows his darling around like a dog all day.” is a common statement from those who recognize him happily trotting down the street to go see you- that’s right. He’ll walk instead of taking a carriage. He doesn’t want the visit to feel so formal, he really just wants to spend time with you, even if you aren’t out in society yet. Jonathan thinks it’s going to help his chances of being formally introduced to you when you really become a débutante- but it is not. Gifts, flowers, attention, it all comes off as too much. He mopes a bit when his efforts are proven to be futile, but that doesn’t mean that he’s discouraged. Well, it doesn’t matter, he can always just propose. Why would your parents turn down a proposal from a Joestar, who can take care of you forever? 

Erina tends to be rather shy. She sincerely prays that she’s caught your eye- and does just about everything she can think of to get it. She’s quite the stalker. Your interests are her interests! She’ll show up at any sport you play just to watch you and show you she’s right there to support you, even if she avoids directly speaking to you for quite some time. It’s improper, and she doesn’t want to come across as needy, or socially inept. She can hope, though. Maybe if she just keeps showing up in places she knows you’ll be. The best day of her life is likely the day you come to a débutante ball, assuming you’re of the same social class. She hovers quite a bit, and takes a moment to beg whatever God is out there to introduce you to her. When her wish is granted, she clings to you for the rest of the night, regardless of what is and is not appropriate. 

Dio is a man obsessed with social standing. When you’re denied something for so long, it’s obvious that you’d become infatuated until you get it. Dio’s temperament is closer to obsession; Even when Dio reached his comfortable spot, he still wanted more. He actually takes courting rather seriously in his youth, he does it the proper way. He waits until you’ve been formally introduced to society, and makes his initial move. Just one dance will do. He doesn’t want to come off as desperate- Despite being at every single ball you’ve ever attended, sans one or two for his reputation’s sake. He’ll only visit your home on the proper days, always brings gorgeous, full bouquets, and leaves within forty-five minutes. He’s not about to take up your entire afternoon, but he’s not about to let another suitor talk your ear off for that long, either. Whatever hobby you’ve taken up is his greatest interest for today’s conversation. When you see him in public he’ll offer a polite smile, but nothing more. Of course, this all goes out the window when he turns, since he can just take you with absolutely no repercussions. 

Johnny is always going to treat the world like it’s Danville, Kentucky. His stay in England didn’t have any effect on him development-wise, he sounds like he’s from Kentucky still, too. All that bullshit about waiting around for the chance to dance with his darling is his own personal nightmare- and it isn’t going to happen anytime soon. He has a bit of a ‘modern’ take on dating, if you could call it that. He’s not as obviously affectionate as someone like Gyro, but it’s not like there’s a lack of it. He’ll hold his darling’s hand while you wait in line, he’ll whine until you sit with him on his horse, he can’t sleep unless you’re right there… Johnny’s pretty forward, regardless of what society deems is fine. He’s a good boy, especially in his prime- there’s no reason for your family to not like him. If your family isn’t accepting of him… he doesn’t really want their blessing, anyway.

Gyro has adapted fairly well to life in America, but not when it comes to the culture shock of not being able to cling to his darling constantly. Whether or not his explanation of how being overly affectionate is the norm back home is true is up for debate. He loves to hang on his darling- putting his head on top of yours while you try to talk to some poor stranger is one of his preferred pastimes. Gyro does plan on returning home eventually, but he has some things to do here before he can- one of those things being finding a way to take you back with him. Gyro’s not really put off by getting told to stop, truly, what are you going to do about it? Are you going to get in the way of him and his darling? Don’t be stupid. Gyro will listen to his darling’s request to not have as much pda if you genuinely compromise with him. No pda, but full access to you in privacy? Cool, cool, we’re never going out again. Gyro gets his fill in little ways, he wants to at least hold hands, or be able to put his hand on your waist. You’re seriously denying him what he needs because it isn’t “socially acceptable”?? You’re being ridiculous. Gyro won’t humor silly courting rules because it’s what you’re used to, he’s right here, you’re right here, if the only thing between you is some traditions, then Gyro has nothing in his way. 

Firstly, Hotpants does not really acknowledge societal norms. She’s taking on the “man’s” role in the relationship anyway, so if her darling is feminine, it could pass as a “typical” relationship, as long as she’s presenting herself in a masculine way. She gets weird looks when she goes to get dinner for the two of you- she catches, you cook. People often try to haggle her when she needs to buy new gear, it’s annoying. It’s actually a giant pain in the ass for her, but it’s worth it if it’s to provide for you. Hotpants isn’t really interested in the whole courting process, she’s very quick to snatch her darling up and lock them somewhere safe, even if you're not sure who she is. You can play housespouse for her while she takes care of what she needs to, you’re being given the easy life, is it really that bad? She’s not even forcing you to be affectionate with her- just stay put and listen to what she tells you to do. You can even write to your family, if you want, just know that she’s going to skim it over to make sure it’s appropriate. You’ll even have some time alone while she goes out for the day- interrupted by the sound of her boots and the sight of her jacket hung up by the door. When you are eventually let out- Likely to transport you somewhere else, I cannot see Hotpants letting her darling back out again- she’s a bit cold, but firm. If you can be trusted to sit still, she’ll let you ride her horse while she guides it. If you cannot, she’ll ride with you, arms around your sides.

[yanderes-galore]

Yandere! JoJo's Bizarre Adventure Masterlist

(Parts 1-8 + Games)

Part 2 - Battle Tendency

Yandere! Part 2! Speedwagon Prompts 6 + 8 (Romantic) [GENDER-NEUTRAL]

Part 3 - Stardust Crusaders

Yandere Alphabet - Jotaro Kujo (Romantic) [GENDER-NEUTRAL]

Yandere! Noriaki Kakyoin Concept (Romantic) [GENDER-NEUTRAL]

Yandere! DIO with Minion! Darling (Romantic/Platonic) [GENDER-NEUTRAL]

Yandere! DIO with Joestar! Darling (Platonic) [GENDER-NEUTRAL]

Part 4 - Diamond is Unbreakable

Yandere! Okuyasu Nijimura Concept (Romantic) [GENDER-NEUTRAL]

Yandere! Yoshikage Kira Concept (Ft. Killer Queen) (Romantic) [GENDER-NEUTRAL]

Part 5 - Vento Aureo/Golden Wind

Yandere! Dragon Rider AU! Diavolo with Dragon Rider! Darling (Romantic (Diavolo)/Platonic (King Crimson)) [GENDER-NEUTRAL]

Yandere! Narancia Prompts 3 + 10 (Romantic) [GENDER-NEUTRAL]

Yandere! Narancia Ghirga Concept (Romantic/Platonic) [GENDER-NEUTRAL]

Yandere! Diavolo Concept (FT. Doppio) (Romantic) [GENDER-NEUTRAL]

Yandere! Guido Mista Concept (Romantic/Platonic) [GENDER-NEUTRAL]

Part 7 - Steel Ball Run

Yandere! Johnny Joestar Concept (Romantic) [GENDER-NEUTRAL]

Part 9 - JoJoLands

Midnight Revelations - Yandere! Dragona Joestar Short (Platonic -> Romantic) [GENDER-NEUTRAL]

[thornybubbles]

Yandere JoJo Headcanons: What Makes Them Dangerous (Johnny Joestar)

Johnny’s dark determination coupled with his need to maintain his delusions are his most dangerous traits. These two factors cause Johnny to be a yandere no one wants to trifle with. His Stand, Tusk, is one of the strongest Stands there is and his ability to use Spin adds a double whammy of danger to the mix. Once Johnny has decided that you and him are a couple, that’s it. You just ARE a couple. He doesn’t care if you agree with him or not. Rejection? Don’t be stupid. No really, Reader, don’t be stupid. Rejecting him will stir up the seeds of resentment in him and believe me when I say you don’t want that. Having Johnny obsess over you is one thing, but being on his bad side is a recipe for disaster. 

Keep Johnny happy, Reader. That’s your best bet for survival. Why did I say “survival”? Why do you think? Johnny doesn’t have very many people left in his life and he’ll cling to anyone that is still sticking around. He has some extreme abandonment issues and they only get worse if something happens to Gyro. If it ends up with just you and Johnny left to deal with Valentine, Johnny’s fragile hold on reality will snap. 

The time to escape him is long, long passed by this point. Now you’re stuck with a Johnny who views you as the love of his life and believes you to feel the same. Even if you don’t, you’d better keep that to yourself. Johnny doesn’t want to hear it. Does Johnny actually love you? Well, he certainly thinks he does. Even if it isn't what a stable minded person would call love, Johnny still has an extreme attachment to you. Whatever the case, his main goal now is to keep you safe from his enemies and if that means locking you away somewhere that no one will find you, then so be it. You will live out the rest of your days with Johnny as he forces you to pretend to be his little lover. And you’d better play along, Reader. Stand up to him or ruin his fantasy in any way and he’ll make you regret ever having been born. If by some EXTREMELY slim chance you manage to escape him, prepare to live the rest of your life on the run. You will go mad from the paranoia of never knowing just when he’ll catch up to you (and he WILL catch up to you). Once he finds you again, he’ll make sure that running away never crosses your mind ever again. I’d wish you luck, Reader, but if you managed to get Johnny as a yandere, then your luck has run out. 

[normalaboutfugo]

YANDERE JJBA X READER MASTERLIST

TW :: yandere tendencies, obsessiveness, kidnapping, the whole thing yk?, both platonic and romantic under the cut.

✭ — PHANTOM BLOOD

nothing here yet..

✭ — BATTLE TENDENCY

nothing here yet..

✭ — STARDUST CRUSADERS

nothing here yet..

✭ — DIAMOND IS UNBREAKABLE

nothing here yet..

✭ — GOLDEN WIND

platonic yandere don giorno x sibling reader

✭ — STONE OCEAN

nothing here yet..

✭ — STEEL BALL RUN

nothing here yet..

✭ — JOJOLION

nothing here yet..

✭ — JOJOLANDS

nothing here yet..

[duskoon]

Jojo Bizarre Adventures Masterlist + Character list:

• Anything related to JJBA and the characters I am willing to write for would be listed here. If there is any character not mentioned here, you can always request for them.(Including sentient / Automatic stands, like: Anubis. Or manga characters, but be warned for spoilers.)

• Characters in italicised bold means I am mostly invested in them, but that doesn’t mean I won’t write for the others. (R) stands for Romantic, and (P) stands for platonic.

• Minors are aged up to 18+. Also some characters like Josuke have 4suke, that refers to Josuke from part four. While 8suke, refers to Josuke from part eight. You can clearly *Ahem* see which parts are my favorites 😏.

Part 1: Phantom Blood:-

• Jonathan Joestar (R & P)

• Erina Pendleton (R & P)

• Dio Brando (R only)

• Will. A. Zeppeli (R & P)

• Robert E. O. Speedwagon aka. Best wifey (R & P)

• Strazio (R & P)

• Bruford (R & P)

Part 2: Battle Tendency:-

• Joseph Joestar (R & P)

• Ceaser Zeppeli (R & P)

• Lisa Lisa (R & P)

• Rudol von Stroheim (R & P)

• Suzi Q (R & P)

• Kars (R only)

• Esidisi (R & P)

• Wammu (R & P)

• Santana (R & P)

Part 3: Stardust Crusaders:-

• Jotaro Cujoh* (R & P)

• Muhammad Avdol (R & P)

• Noriaki Kakyoin (R & P)

• Jean Pierre Polnareff (R & P)

• Iggy (P only)

• DIO (R only)

• Vanilla Ice (R & P)

• Hol Horse (R & P)

• Telence T. D'Arby (R & P)

• Daniel J. D'Arby (R & P)

• N'Doul (R & P)

• Mariah (R & P)

Part 4: Diamond is Unbreakable:-

• Josuke <4suke> Higashikata* (R & P)

• Koichi Hirose* (R & P)

• Okuyasu Nijimura* (R & P)

• Rohan Kishibe (R & P)

• Yukako Yamagishi (R only)

• Tonio Trussardi (R & P)

• Yoshikage Kira <4ira> (R only)

• Keicho Nijimura (R & P)

Part 5: Golden Wind:-

• Giorno Giovanna* (R & P)

• Bruno Bucciarati (R & P)

• Leone Abbacchio (R & P)

• Guido Mista (R & P)

• Narancia Ghirga* (R & P)

• Pannacotta Fugo (R & P)

• Trish Una* (R & P)

• Diavolo / Vinegar Doppio (R only)

• Cioccolata (R only)

• Secco (R only)

• Squalo (R & P) ~ Yandere! Tiziano and Squalo with a foster child! Reader [W.I.P].

• Tizzano (R & P) ~ Yandere! Tiziano and Squalo with a foster child! Reader [W.I.P].

• Risotto Nero (R & P)

• Formaggio (R & P)

• Illuso (R & P)

• Prosciutto (R & P)

• Pesci (R & P)

• Melone (R & P)

• Ghiaccio (R & P)

• Sorbet (R & P)

• Gelato (R & P)

Part 6: Stone Ocean:-

• Jolyne Cujoh (R & P)

• Ermes Costello (R & P)

• Emporio Alnino (P only)

• Foo Fighters (R & P)

• Weather Report (R & P)

• Narciso Anasui (R & P)

• Gwess (R & P)

• Enrico Pucci (R only)

• Donatello Versus (R & P)

• Rikiel (R & P)

• Ungalo (R & P)

• Johngalli A. (R & P)

• Sports Maxx (R & P)

• Thunder McQueen (R & P)

Part 7: Steel Ball Run:-

• Johnny Joestar (R & P)

• Gyro Zeppeli (R & P)

• Lucy Steel* (R & P)

• Diego Brando (R & P)

• Hot Pants (R & P)

• Mountain Tim (R & P)

• Funny Valentine (R only)

• Scarlet Valentine (R only)

Part 8: Jojolion:-

• Josuke <8suke, Gappy> Higashikata (R & P)

• Yasuho Hirose best girl (R & P)

• Rai Mamezuku (R & P)

• Jobin Higashikata (R & P)

• Joshu Higashikata (R & P)

• Kei Nijimura (R & P)

• Hato Higashikata (R & P)

• *Daiya Higashikata (R & P)

• Mitsuba Higashikata (R & P)

• Kaato Higashikata (R & P)

• Karera Sakunami (R & P)

• Yoshikage Kira <8ira> (R & P)

• Josefumi Cujoh (R & P)

• Toru (R only) - General Headcanons [W.I.P].

• Yotsuyu Yagiyama (R & P)

• Aisho Dainenjiyama (R & P) - General Headcanons [W.I.P].

• Wu Tomoki (R & P)

• Jojo Bizarre Adventures rightfully belongs to Hirohiko Araki.

[mothwingwritings]

OK I am going to try and take a stab at this lol

I have been wanting to attempt a prompt list for awhile and we are reaching a follower mile stone and I kinda want to do something fun to celebrate, so HERE GOES NOTHING!!! ᕕ༼⌐■-■༽ᕗ

I am for a limited time taking requests ONLY for this THIS yandere alphabet prompt. <3 I will only accept characters from Baki, Tokyo Revengers, and Jojo's Bizarre Adventure (up through Steel Ball Run, I have not read Jojolion and on yet).

Feel free to drop me a line if you are so inclined. Just include your character and what you would like me to answer! B) Also if it takes me some time to respond I apologize, life mishaps are a thing and stewing on the perfect response usually does take me some time. (づ ᴗ _ᴗ)づ♡

Let's have fun! :D

[the-illiterate-pirate]

I suppose I can publish this a little early hehe

Happy Valentine's Day, you love birds! I come baring a special gift, very indulgent and dedicated to a friend, but I wanted to share it with everyone. Hope you enjoy! <3

Cupid's Chokehold

Warnings and Notes: fem!reader, mentions of eating food (specifically pork) near the end, negative thoughts towards the reader, maybe not the most yandere piece you'll read but warnings still apply for violence and blood, but mostly fluff. And finally CHUBBY VALENTINE SUPREMACY

The president's mood was lifted immensely when you were in the room with him. Even when you were doing something as childish as taking enjoyment from the fat in his cheeks.

He allowed you to sit with him in his chair, feet kicking off the other of his lap while you massaged his face. Valentine took great joy in the feeling of your warm hands, his heart silently swooning from your touch. Everything felt soft like bird feathers, and it was another tug at his heart strings. If only things were different. If only he wasn't the president. Maybe he could indulge in your sweet touch for all of eternity, without interruption.

"Excuse me... Sir?"

"Hm? Oh, my apologies, I forgot you were here." Valentine hummed nonchalantly, carefully taking a hand in his to point his attention at the man in front of him, bored looking, rubbing his thumb against the tendons in your hand. The other man dressed in a fine suit watched, nervously clearing his throat. "Y-Y'see sir, there's a... Problem with some of the other guards here in the building. They've been saying some questionable things, I was hoping we could speak more privately–"

"Dear, please stop." Valentine interrupted to speak to you yet again, giggling with his face cupped in your hands once more.

He gently took them in his his, kissing the insides of your cool, soft palms, swiveling in his chair away from the desk. He lightly pushed you out of his lap to stand on your own feet, "Go, try some of the foods our chef brought up for us."

Pouting cutely, you did as told. But not before adding a sweet kiss to Valentine's forehead. "Okay~."

His soldier caught the dreamy smile on his president's lips. His relationship with his first lady was one for the papers. A true power couple. In all honesty the lonely soldier was quite jealous of the sweet lady his president Valentine was blessed with. But his stress was running high. And his very dear president was not listening to a damn word he had to say. "Mr. President...?"

"Yes, my apologies... What was it you were saying?"

The soldier sighed. "Right, sir. It's a very sensitive topic I need to speak with you about. I'm trying to word this delicately... I've heard conversations between guards lately... And–"

"Cheesecake?"

"No, thank you. Wait. Is that strawberry?" Valentine closed his eyes, delighted in the soft, creamy taste of the airy desert. You took immense joy in feeding him small bites of the cake, prompted by a soft noise any time he opened his mouth for more.

He looked so sweet in the moment, staring into you as if you were the only thing that mattered to him. His lips tasted like the sweet cake, promoting giggles from you as Valentine covered you in kisses up to your forehead down to your lips.

"My love, you taste sweeter than anything else." He sighed against your neck, tickling your skin with his pointy nose. You add a big smooch on his face, squeezing his squishy cheek while you cooed, "My dear Valentine~."

The nameless soldier had enough. He stood, fists clashing against the wooden desk, finally at his limit. "President Valentine! This is serious!"

"You're still here?! Spit it out already! Can't you see I have more pressing things to attend to?"

"Sir, just last night I overheard two guards arguing about the first lady. They... They said she wasn't fit to marry you."

At the pang of your fork falling to the floor, the room went dead silent. You were horrified, the hands just holding your soon-to-be husband coming up to hide your mouth. While Valentine didn't share your fear, there was a look of muddled disgust and questioning on his face the guard before him confused with terror.

As Valentine thought of a new plan, you had excused yourself to hide your sorrow away in the corner of the president's room. Valentine barely heard what the other man had said. Once the words left the soldier's lips the blond was already getting out of his seat, quickly making his way to you, placing gentle arms around you to console you close.

"Oh, Dear, please, look at me. Don't let two insolent fool's words hurt you, you know it isn't true."

But you were unconsolable. His gloved hand moved to cup your face, tenderly, but you refused. You turned away, masking your sobs behind your shaking hand. Valentine saw the light of the window reflected in your glassy, wet eyes and something sparked within him.

"But Valentine. What if what they say is true? What if this just happens to be our first of hearing it, but the rest of your men agree? What if I am unfit to be their first lady...?"

He quickly silenced you. "Stop! Of course you'll make the perfect first lady! Please, don't let an idiot's mocking get the best of you!"

Your meek eyes turned down. His hands, they held you firmly, but so softly. No matter how abrasive he was, Valentine always treated you gently. Even as his anger flew wildly he found it in himself to comfort you as well as he could.

Even so... You couldn't bear to let him treat you in such a way. Did you really deserve it? To feel his kind hand on you? "I don't think I can, Valentine. If my own people don't like me, how can I ever stand next to you as your wife..? Someone like you... They deserve better than something like..." Valentine couldn't hear another word.

His hand grabbed your chin. He forced you to look back up at his piercing eyes, and he stole a kiss. Plush lips against yours, so warm, a comfort you couldn't find anywhere else than him. The sweet taste of your shared dessert lingered, combined with the salt of your tears. He didn't pull away until you had to, gasping for air.

"No more... You're not in the right state of mind, my heart. Let's rest. Afterwards we can settle this with calm minds."

"A-A nap..? Maybe...Maybe you're right. I may feel better after some rest." Valentine rested a hand on the small of your back, easily guiding you to the bedroom off to the side of his office. You wandered off to open the door, anxiety ridden hands fumbling with the knobs until he opened the door for you. The presidential bedroom was dark and warm, inviting you in easily with the promises of an undisturbed nap.

"I'm right behind you, dear. I'll be with you shortly."

You nodded along without saying a word. You trusted him. You gathered yourself and made it to the bed, as the president turned an angry glare at the guard still at his desk. The soldier was frozen in fear. His president took cold steps towards his seat, and he didn't move. His presence overwhelmed the officer in question, not able to do a damn thing until the president's hands came down on to the chairs armrests with much force, where he jumped slightly.

"You will tell me the names of the two guards you heard over sharing. Next, you're going to leave this room. Understood?"

The younger man nodded, "Y-Yes, Mr. President." He took a deep breath before continuing, "Their names are Officer Paul and Officer Art. Badge numbers are..."

Valentine took into great detail what the man below him said. He already knew of Officer Paul, a nasty bastard who talked too much and never knew when to shut up. He was good at his job and that was why he stayed. Officer Art he couldn't put a finger on. But the president would figure it out soon.

"Good work. You're dismissed." Valentine let go of the chair and proceeded to make his way to your shared bedroom. The other man sighed in relief of finally getting away from the president's rage. In all his six years of working for Funny Valentine, never before had he seen him like this. Valentine was always level headed. Even in dire circumstances, he was calm, collected, and as sharp as a bayonet. There was something bubbling from underneath the surface now, something nerve-wracking.

"Mr. President, what are you... What are you planning on doing to those men?"

Valentine stopped walking, hand on the doorknob. "What I do doesn't concern you. You'll be paid handsomely for your work here, but now you're free to leave."

It was simple; treason is punishable by death, of course. But Officer Miller was a good man, he didn't need to know he had the blood of two men on his hands. Valentine will settle the score with them later, for now he had a very troubled fianceé to console. And console he shall.

A woman like you didn't deserve to have her heart played with. You were perfect, for all Valentine cared. You held him dearly, despite his round appearance. Of course he didn't care what he looked like, but it was nice to hear you enjoyed the squishy parts of his body, along with everything else. It was easy for you to steal his heart away. Call him a fool, but someone like you helped him believe in something as childish as love at first sight.

He was there with you as you fell into slumber. His hand on your head, gently stroking your hair. He watched your eyes close, they were still red, but hazy with sleep rather than tears.

He couldn't help himself. Valentine leaned down to place a chaste kiss on your crown, whispering to you before he moved. "Don't worry your sweet head about any of this. You'll make the perfect wife, I know. And once you wake, this will all feel like a bad dream."

"F..Funny..? You're not leaving, are you..?"

"Of course not, dear." He lied through his teeth without a shred of guilt. "I'll be here with you, sleeping beside you."

Finally, he saw your smile again. It warmed his heart to see such a sweet, tired looking thing. "I love you, Valentine."

"And I, you, my sweet girl." One last kiss to your temple, and he watched you fall asleep. For good measure he stayed like this for a few more minutes, watching your breathing move your sleeping figure and rubbing his thumb against the knuckles of your hand. Once he was sure your breathing was deep and slow, he silently left into the night, with you in his heart, and murder in his mind.

Against a wall a soldier stood. Late at night, her eyes drooped with the heavy need to sleep. She was alone. No one else to keep her company in this corner of the building, on this lonely, quiet night.

She yawned into her hand. Just as the woman blinked away tears she saw someone approach from her left, another guard to relieve her off duty.

"Ah, Officer Paul! Thank goodness, I was feeling like I was just about to pass out where I stood." They gave each other a short salute, Paul taking the younger woman's place against the wall. Just as they swapped places her shoulder collided with his. A quick sorry was said, but the girl quickly skittered away to find her sleeping quarters. She missed the irritated sneer he gave her backside, and couldn't hear the curse he spoke underneath his breath.

"Fucking bitch."

He squared his shoulders, firearm secure in his grip, and Officer Paul got ready for a very long night with a hangover.

No one else was here with him. There was no moving air, not a soul to stir up a current, but Paul was keenly aware of the fluttering flag next to him. The end of the flag just inches off of the floor lapped at the turning corner of the next hallway in an odd way. A strange miracle maybe. Or maybe this place was haunted, that'd give Paul something to care about.

So fixated on the flag he looked up just in time to meet the eye of his superior. Clad in pink and about a head shorter was his president. "Oh, Mr. Valentine. What brings you here?"

Valentine hummed before speaking. "I thought a stroll around my building would help me relax, I was having a rough time falling asleep."

A strange reason to explore the forgotten corners of the house, but Valentine was his own man.

"Officer Paul is it? I did come to find you because I had a very important conversation to have with you."

The man, taller than his president by a head, finally turned to give the blond his complete attention. "Yes, Mr. President?"

What happened next, Officer Paul wasn't sure how to explain. Valentine stood still, his eyes unfeeling as he watched a hole form in the officer's body. As if a fist had been punched through his abdomen, but there wasn't anything Paul could see. Whatever it was went right through him, keeping him from bleeding out and trapping him on that invisible force like a fish on a hook.

Valentine walked closer as the officer doubled over in pain. On his knees, Valentine could stare the younger man dead in the eye, that emotionless stare now replaced with rage. "Did you really think you could get away with speaking ill of your president's wife?" He asked in a cold tone.

Paul was lifted up until his feet couldn't feel the ground. He choked up red, blood staining his chin and splattering on Valentine's cheek as he backed Paul into a corner and a nearby door. It didn't affect him. He continued to talk.

"You are out of your mind if you thought for even a second you could get away with it." Paul only coughed up more blood.

Valentine said nothing as he took the door in his hand ready to slam it against Officer Paul's weak bloodied face. He looked him in the eye one final time before sending him away with the ability of his Stand, never to be seen again. Even as his blood boiled over what the man had said, Valentine steeled himself and took a breath. He still had work to do.

Valentine turned back to look over the crime scene. Apart from some blood in the carpet everything was right. Valentine sighed, even after he disappeared he still caused trouble. Oh, well. Valentine would stage it as an attack. He'd wound himself and say Paul disappeared after he was let go. Later he'd get a maid to clean this up, the first person he needed to see next was Officer Art.

The next morning when you woke up the room smelled of sweet syrup and freshly cooked meat. A window was open, the curtains pulled to allow fresh air and a soft ray of light to illuminate the room. At your bedside was a moving tray, decorated with silver platters and a lovely candle burning bright. Just as you twisted away to stretch you noticed who had woken you. Valentine watched you with a soft look on his face while you stirred and stretched and rubbed away the tiredness from your eyes. Once you were settled you quickly found yourself taken into his gentle arms, squeezing you close with a kiss on your brow,

"Good morning, my love."

"Good morning, dear."

Once your mornings were said Valentine moved away to start preparing breakfast. You watched in amazement as he took off the lids to the platters, a soft but equally excited "dojyaaan~" was heard. The plates were all stacked high with bacon, sausage, pancakes, eggs, everything to make up a complete breakfast. With warm syrup and juice to top it off. "All of this food for me?" You asked in awe.

"Well, for us. I still haven't eaten yet, but I wanted to spend the morning of Valentine's day with you."

"My stars! It's Valentine's Day already?!" You took the plate he offered reluctantly. The food looked delicious, but you only looked at it with sadness. "I was supposed to have something planned... But I've been so busy, and with last night's fiasco..."

Valentine silenced you with a light kiss. "Nonsense dear, you don't need to plan anything," He placed a cup full of your favorite juice on the nightstand beside you. "Getting to be with you is perfect for me." And finally he got into bed next to you. "Speaking of last night. How are you feeling? You slept straight through the night, I'm guessing it helped some?"

You nodded, swallowing a hunk of pancake before answering. "Yes I feel much better. Looking back on it, I think I might've overreacted... I'm sorry."

Valentine waved you off after setting down his coffee. "Nonsense. What happened last night was unacceptable, but it's been taken care of." Nothing else was said after that. The memory of last night still made you uneasy, but not as bad as before. Had you overreacted? What was the right reaction to being called a poor wife to the president? And what did he mean by "take care of"? Did he fire the poor soldiers? You remember a glimpse of yesterday night. Late after midnight, just for a moment he was missing but you fell back asleep before it bothered you. Valentine had always been a poor sleeper, thinking about it now, though, that might've been his opportunity to strike. You continued to eat. Your overthinking let your eggs get cold.

Valentine did his utmost best to make breakfast perfect. Never for a second did your cup run dry, or your plate have empty space until you had to pry him away from the food cart. You both were cuddled together now, bellies full and happy with utensils and plates pushed aside, just for a second while you indulge in his presence. It was one of those domestic moments you didn't get often. You'd have to milk it while you had the chance.

"This morning has been perfect... I don't want to leave bed for a second." You snuggled closer to him, head tucked between his arm with your hand playing with his chest. He was warm and soft, and so were the blankets. You had to fight off your drowsy urges, lest you fall back asleep.

Valentine chuckled, the vibrations jostling you lightly. "It has been... Although, there's one thing I almost forgot to give you."

Unfortunately, he moved to get out of bed. You watched him move back to your side, confused with an eyebrow arched. Valentine patted off his pink suit, before offering you his hand and pulling you up to sit at the foot of the bed.

"What's this all about, Funny?" You ask, rubbing away the sleep in your left eye.

"Something very important." He says getting on his knees. He gripped a hand in his, looking you in the eye. Just before eating he took off his gloves. The skin underneath was soft, he liked to moisturize often to keep them baby smooth. They were warm, and you felt safe being held in them and looking into his adoration filled eyes. "My dearest Y/n. I love you, truly and with my entire heart. With you, my heart is clear, and there is no one else who can do the things you do to me. But yesterday I was reminded of something. In every sense of the word, except by law, it feels as if we've been married to each other for a very long time."

He let go of your hand to retrieve something from his inner coat pocket. A small, velvety box. At your feet, with you towering above him like a beautiful angel, he showed you vulnerability as he opened up the box to reveal a beautiful engagement ring.

"Will you do me the honor of marrying me, and becoming my Mrs. Valentine?"

Your hands were thrown to your mouth to stifle a gasp. You took in the scene: your boyfriend on his knees, staring up at you with hopeful blue eyes. The ring was gaudy, the diamond in the middle taking up far too much space in the tiny box. But in its extravagant way it reminded you of your boyfriend. No, your fiancé.

"Oh, Funny, yes of course I'll marry you!" You fall into his lap, him catching you with ease, he held the ring in a death drip while you proceed with smothering his face in kisses. No one but you two existed, there was no one and nothing stopping you from doing as you pleased in the security of your bedroom. He kissed you back with fervency, placing his hot lips against yours, tasting like sweet alcohol with the same effect on your body. Your hearts hammered together like wild birds in their cages.

"I love you, my dear, sweet, Mrs. Valentine."

You giggle against his mouth, the sound exciting his pumping heart more. "I love you too, Mr. Valentine."

He kissed you again, "You'll be mine forever, right?"

You held him closer, arms wrapping around him in a gentle hug while you rested your chin on his shoulder. "Yes... Till death do us part, isn't that right?" Yes. He liked the sound of that.

He held you back. No matter what, Valentine would make sure you stayed by his side. Even if he had to fight tooth and nail to keep you there. He planted a final kiss on your lips.

[stupid-sloot-headcanons]

i just finished steel ball run for the first time and id love to know your thoughts on funny valentine not headcanons or yandere thoughts just your opinions on him as a character because i thought as jjba villains go he was pretty interesting

I still think that the crown for "Villain you can argue did nothing wrong" in JJBA goes more to Pucci, but I like Funny Valentine a lot as a villain! Great design, great reveal as to how his Stand/goals/plan work, and [MASSIVE SBR SPOILERS] I love that the big final move Gyro and Johnny do...doesn't fucking work. It's one of the best parts of Steel Ball Run imo. He's also really fun to play as in ASB and EoH (tho I haven't checked him out in ASBR)

Were it not for the fact that he (and his wife, aka the worst lesbian rep we could've gotten thank you Araki very cool) are peds that try to get with 14 y/o Lucy, I'd say he's a perfect morally grey villain. Wanting to sleep with a kid tho isn't morally grey, so he falls short of that moral grayness argument compared to like. Part 6 DIO or Pucci imo. But you don't need to be entirely morally grey to be a great villain, like that's why Yoshikage Kira's the shit