#yeah i wanna go from fighting the de rolos to fucking the de rolos

[vethyourhalflingmother]

Beau, Vex, Keg

Slow Burn: KegFake Date: BeauEnemies to Lovers: Vex

[your-turn-to-role]

Top 5 critical role npcs who are family members of player characters

you know i’m kind of honoured by how well you lot know me, all the questions i’ve got today have been so targeted at the shit i’m into

but oooooohhh, this is a question

like there’s a space for family members who i love

and there’s also a space for the ones who are complete dickheads or outright villains but are interesting, or have interesting scenes (thoreau lionett, syldor vessar, kevdak, a lot of the trickfoots)

but just going with that former question....

5. Cassandra de Rolo

her and percy have the best relationship, for starters, i love the very careful mix of “we lost all our other family and you’re all i have left and you’re the most important person in the world to me and i love you” but also “you’re my sibling and i cannot stand to see your face”, it makes for the funniest scenes, percy hugging her and her fighting him off, cass mocking percy after they get back in search for bob, the whole thing after his resurrection... it’s wonderful.

but also just on her own merit, this girl has been through a lot, like... losing your whole family when you’re only 13 or so (a lot of people seem to forget she’s the youngest de rolo), hiding in your own house and hearing them torture your brother, helping him escape only to get shot down and nearly die, wake up and be told percy’s dead too, you really have nothing left. living in the same castle as the murderers for your entire teenage years, watching as they slowly kill your city, mind controlling you into helping. being freed from that and suddenly instated as the leader of the city, just barely an adult and not trusting any of your own decisions but knowing that everyone relies on you, and you can’t let them down. and fucking doing it, like, cassandra is so fucking strong, barely anyone even knows she’s struggling. more hugs for cass pls she’s real good and didn’t deserve this

(also, rogues. are my fave.)

4. Velora Vessar

god i wish we could have seen more of her. i know they can’t do anything about the technical difficulties but the fact that her first scene gets cut out is an endless source of frustration, i want to see the child!

but what we do have is wonderful, she’s so cute, i love. both of the twins are so soft around her which is a side of them i love seeing, and also like... her and her outdoorsy nature and her owlbear and her just lowkey encouraging the twins’ rebellion by being a rebellious child and her pretending to be the twins and just aaaaaahhhh

she’s also like... somewhere between fjord and caleb’s age (which is kind of weird to think about but also you can reverse it and think about how during the vox machina campaign fjord and caleb were this tiny), so she’s high on the list of characters i’d like to see return in campaign 2, it probably won’t happen but like... i wanna know what velora’s like now

(rogue! rogue! rogue! rogue! rogue!)

3. Calliope or Clarabelle Clay

yeah, i really can’t pick on this one. i mean this space is kinda for all the clays, because i adore this family and everything about it, but particularly the sisters. calliope because we saw the most of her and her relationship with caduceus which is also great (like, i love endlessly loving sibling relationships as much as the next person but sibling relationships with taliesin’s characters are just so antagonistic in the funniest way, the scene with cad and calliope and the pool? perfection), and clarabelle because she’s small and weird and likes bugs and i adore her

2. Marion Lavorre

i love that there’s a mother in this show that isn’t dead? and is a good mother? of the very few mothers in dnd that are alive, most of them aren’t great people, or at the very least, enabling a very not great father. but marion is just so wonderful, i love her so much. i also love the fact that like, she’s a sex worker and everyone knows this but no one thinks less of her for it, she’s incredibly highly respected and everyone loves her, and while she may be a single parent of a daughter she wasn’t prepared for, she’s given that daughter more love than like every other parent in this show combined. takes no shit, is incredibly respectful of whatever jester wants to do with her life, jester can talk openly to her about anything, there’s no judgement, just support. also like... has fears, struggles to leave the house, but isn’t looked down on for that either

(also i just adore seeing her interact with the rest of the mighty nein, it’s so funny)

1. Kaylie Shorthalt

it’s funny considering scanlan is pretty low on the list of my favourite characters, not because i don’t like him, just, he’s not much my type and everyone else i like more. but seriously i would watch a whole show just for kaylie. i love the way matt plays her, i love her personality, i love her character arc and development, i love what her presence does to scanlan’s character arc and development, i love that she’s a tough street-wise gnome girl who will beat your ass in a bar fight but also is a violinist (and like, fiddler style, i say this as someone who plays the violin and also has a bit of experience with most instruments, that is one of the hardest things to learn in music, it requires so much patience, dedication, and precision. fiddlers get a reputation based on the style of music they play of being like... easy going laid back jokey people but legit if someone can play a fiddle well they are every bit as professional as a goddamn orchestral pianist), as well as pretty good in most other instruments. this girl will 100% cheat you out of money in a gambling game but also you could put her in a music school and she’d show up almost everyone there, i’m not kidding.

her dedication and skill is also pretty clear when like... her and scanlan left for a year to figure themselves out and returned as crime lords running half of ank’harel.

and then she decides what she wants to do with her life after vecna’s gone and scanlan’s no longer in danger is go to school, because she never finished school, but not just to learn, specifically to prove she’s better than rich kids

(and probably beat up one or two i’m sure)

seriously she’s the best

[nochiquinn]

liam’s one shot: don’t awoo $350

I'm sorry how long now

ugh, I still need to watch handbooker

"just two hours of going through matt's tablet"

erica's hair is super pretty

datemate has already ordered both the pins and the wildemount dice

BUT NOT THE MAP I'm getting a divorce

non-descript third-party red licorice

oh good yay more live shows that makes me excited

(I'm SORRY they're hard for me to watch and I get grumpy about having to miss an episode because of stupid brain reasons)

it's okay laura me too

half my inbox is just password reminders

is this canon now, will there be werewolves in the next campaign guide

(there's gonna be a next campaign right)

everyone: super intent on the story laura: ipad

travis please use that voice the whole time

"katerine" oh good I'm prepared to double-take the whole time

okay I take it back if they do that the whole time I'm not gonna make it

"oh, we're people"

"YOU'RE DOING IT, PETER!" that's a fucking reference

yeah travis' voice is going to end me

"oh, that's bad"

"I seem to have tripped"

this door is blocked from the other side

I mean who doesn't have a room full of bodies in their chapel

oh the whole chapel is the room of bodies

lands one punch either side of the doorframe

mala: "they defeated the hardest boss: a door"

"are you gonna barf" "no. I have. allergies."

discord: yes, there's a fjord mustang in the driveway

"are you a real weapon" "YES"

"29?" "FUCK" 

now you know how matt felt about vax

"I sense sarcasm from you, brother"

discord: fresh prints of bel-air

"that would require you to help other people"

motherfuck, erica was emily kaldwin, how did I not know that. my reputation as an imdb addict is slipping

is it sentient

"I don't wanna wolfsplain to you" 

laura and erica get in an actual fistfight at the table

"where is your wisdom?!" "hang on lemme check my sheet"

#areyougonnabarf

that is the best way for them to have that knowledge

how does a wolf even ride a horse

discord: god goldilocks went on a bender and just destroyed this keep

paintings of women from marquet

"he's full of shit he killed them all"

"I speak elvish" "that was our secret twin language"

"why do you pretend you have an accent"

"jelly won't serve you here" erica: why

"I turn into a wolf" "aaaah"

travis: werewoooooooooolves

WOLF ART

slapdick humor

into the woods~

meta were-pigeon

nervously eating red vines

where's my map cam, gimme

maaaaaap

I kind of like how liam tracks initiative

"help me, spirit of matt"

suddenly the fight in the de rolo crypt

skeletal accordion

it lasts until you shit

LIAM

NO

hole in one

"I'm in it. I'm doing the things."

"pull a taliesin" samuel

twin rage

skullcone

bonus noogie

"FUCK HIM AHP" in the pious snob voice is killing me

"to grab her. violently."

"restrain her head. then rip it off."

"thank you." "thank the moonweaver." a million eyeroll emojis

mala: if you have to ask, you're the nerd

"I like her better than you, you big dweeb"

"I believe you, because we are married"

oh wow portia's just about to do a whole death huh

"I cast - " "disembowelment"

"I'll pray for you"

liam. liam stop.

"it's always an elf"

"'free' 'naked'"

"our entire family down here" "not anymore"

bye laura

"THAT HAPPENED NO TAKEBACKS"

just barrels down the hallway, sets off every trap

they're gonna have to fight alfor and grenia aren't they

I take it back they're gonna have to fight jean-biev

(I am almost definitely spelling that wrong)

and then lucius murders them all

secret xhorastian sibling?

(say that three times fast)

DORKS

I would like to awoo

"keg is aroused"

LIAM NOT YOU TOO fucking 1 am initiative rolls

[looks directly into the camera] this is gonna be a total shitshow

GOOD JOB BENNY

"NO ONE LOOK AT ME" also me when I make a mistake

trolololowolf

it's a beholder

actionactionaction

Fuckit Rule

TJ looks like he wants to interject

"WHAT FUCKIN GNARLY TEETH YOU HAVE"

laura: I become jester when I'm nervous

travis: STOP BEING A BUZZKILL AND CLAW PEOPLE

CALLED IT

discord: legendary grandma

jump up on the grandma's back

sam when being offered red vines is me when being offered red vines

"I don't barf in wolf form"

THREE WOLF MOON

"I did not know she could do that" in the tiniest voice

"no opposable thumbs" "but big!"

HASTED DIRE WOLF

"I would like to back up. Because she's terrifying."

"she makes it" "of course she does"

"tj's notes are color codeeeed" what are we, animals?

"I didn't choke him to death, I ripped out his throat"

"shit. balls." now she's getting in the d&d spirit

Invisible Fuck Todd

"what is it with the butt, guys"

wolf grandma beyblade

GEEK AND SUNDRY WHY POOP SELF NOW

I CAME TO TWITCH BC ALPHA WASN'T WORKING

honestly it feels like the twitch streams even have better video quality

lawrence remains wedgie-free

wouldn't it be something if he'd downed himself to amplify that

this is the book caleb bought isn’t it

something of the crick

COURTING. Courting of the Crick.

wandering burners

I’m glad erica kind of loosened up over the episode, she seemed super nervous at first <3

[curriebelle]

Do you have any guesses at the new campaigns character classes? I think Travis will go with matts werewolf homebrew, and Laura will do wizard with a familiar.

Ummmm I’d say I have more hopes than guesses! :P I’ve heard some rumours around, but mostly these are just Things I Would Be Most Excited For:

Travis - Yeah I’d love for him to play the werewolf blood hunter :’D I think it would be particularly rad if he built a Dex-based character so he could kinda take over the scouting/sneaking role from Liam (he’ll also probably want the Dex so he can use ranged weapons, because Grog not being close enough to hit shit was his main frustration late in the campaign). He should DEFINITELY play someone smart so we can all see how evil and cunning he really is~! mwahaha. I have a feeling he could easily be party leader if his character was permitted the intelligence to make decisions. The only thing I know for sure is he’s not playing a monk, because Matt joked about his new character not being able to move 50 feet in a round like Grog could, and monks get speed boosts. And like - even if he’s not a blood hunter, I’m expecting a werewolf plotline B)

Ashley - :( because of Blindspot commitments, I have a feeling she’ll be a class they can afford to lose, so to speak. VM always hurt without their cleric, but like, think how fucked they would have been without their Designated Transportation Druid or That Guy With the Lockpicks? So maybe she could just be something rad like a Barbarian??? :P She’s such a sweetheart I think I’ll enjoy her regardless, though c: 

Laura - the rumour I heard was that she was thinking about playing a cleric, but that was from a single comment on one of my posts and I’m not sure where that rumour comes from? Though I think she’d make a fantastic magic-user c:  I like your familiar idea, in which case maybe she’d be a good warlock, especially because then she could have one of those rad upgraded familiars warlocks get c: but then again, I get the feeling they all wanna try something as different as possible. I’d just love for her to be a charisma-caster powerhouse. Sorcerer would be pretty neat, but I’d punch a giraffe for Laura Bard-ley

Liam - I honestly have no fuckin clue whatsoever :’D maybe he’ll go full paladin, just to see what that’s like? I could see him being a magic-user (though not a cleric because he did that in the last oneshot and I have Another Choice for who I’d like to be the cleric) because whenever he uses magic he’s very, very smart about it. Also he should be married to Sam’s character. So maybe he’d end up being a lil bookworm wizard? FUCK THAT’D BE CUTE. LIAM FOR BOOKWORM ELF WIZARD.

Marisha - A STRONGK WOMAN \o/ I don’t even care which kind I just want her to fuckin ELBOW DROP ON ANOTHER BEHOLDER \o/ Momma Currie wants her to be a barbarian. I think she might roll monk because nobody’s rolled monk yet? And I know she wants to play someone who’s not so much the moral core of the party, so she might be a pretty good choice for The Rogue (cuz you always need one). Or she could try one of the specialty Unearthed Arcana Fighter builds and just have a real cool backstory to go with it. Honestly, I really don’t care what she picks specifically I just want her to be Strongk.

Taliesin -  That’s who I want to play the cleric. Some people would love to see him go warlock, but I think he won’t because that’s what we all expect him to do … :P I’ve listened to a lot of interviews with him because I think he’s basically a genius, and he once said that a character should embody a question you want answered, and if you have an answer ready, you’re not asking a good question. I think he stumbled upon a pretty good question in Percy’s back-and-forthing with the gods and I’d love to see him explore that more. Like if anybody at the table were to pick a super interesting god and have a very interesting relationship with them, it’d be Tal. In that same vein, paladin would also work. Either a cleric or a paladin would be quite a departure from Percy’s damage-dealing role, and there were a handful of fights where he was just useless, which seemed to frustrate him quite a bit. Clerics are never useless :P Also, as a side note, I would like somebody at the table to play as a different gender from their own, and I think Tal could pull that off best. I mean Liam did great as Jayne so now I want somebody to COMMIT TO THAT SHIT. :D I think Marisha’d play a good dude character but I stand by my earlier verdict. She must be Strongk Woman.

Sam - I honestly have a hard time imagining him as Not a Bard, which is hilarious because he’s the only one who spent a long time as a character other than his first. Sam seems to pick classes based on a funny character concept and then eventually digs deep into their psyche and finds the horrible sad traumas motivating the laughter, so…I could honestly see him being a barbarian too, tbh :P but I think he might miss the versatility of spellcasting? I’d say he’d make a fun druid if I didn’t want them to go druidless so people appreciate Keyleth even more retroactively they could play a very different kind of game. Honestly, I’m more excited to see Sam’s concept than his class, because with his insane creativity the class itself is almost a moot point :P

So the party I built through this little exercise is bloodhunter, temporary barbarian, bard, wizard, cleric, monk/rogue (that’s a RAD multiclass btw), and ???Sam??. A little more fragile than before maybe, but about even on the sneakies and the spells c:

Other things I would like:

- meet a bb quarter-elf de Rolo

- Zahra and Kash’s kid is Around being Hot and Grumpy

- Gay

- I want somebody to play a warlock of the archfey pact but when I think about them each individually I have no idea which one I’d pick :’D Probably Laura or Sam. Either would be rad.

I like guessing, but I won’t really care whether I’m right or wrong on any of these because no matter what they pick I’m sure I’ll love the shit outta them :’D I love these guys so musch…../sob