#yearning Wilhelm

[wilhelmsbee]

S1 Wilhelm vs the Gay Allegations…

[life-imitates-art-far-more]

Wilhelm Kotarbiński (1848-1921) "The Dance" Oil on cavas

[xxbeyondangelsxx]

Simon & Wilhelm ● "You are the bane of my existence.. and the object of all my desires.“

Source: Young Royals S2/Netflix

[acolyteszn]

The way they hold each other.... how they look into each others eyes.... how they breathe in sync..... oh they're literally soulmates

[backwaterheroics]

take this to elmyra and say it's from me. — kunsel

party favors → ☆ @sentmail

Cold dread overtakes him, sinking into the soles of his feet and climbing up to settle hollow in his chest.

Not because the request comes from Kunsel, a man whose very presence forces him to face the mirror shards of himself and never see his own face looking back, always other people. Stolen facets, shoddy mockeries—a disregard to which Cloud didn’t even know he was giving. But that’s no excuse, that’s never an excuse.

It’s not because the request is to hand off something to Elmyra, a woman who shares his grief and can no longer muster the energy for anger or hate. Someone who, because of Cloud, had her child stolen from her. She has every right to condemn him, to demand retribution, to curse and scream and scorn him, find him worthless and despicable. Instead she lets him share her space, quietly and never for too long, but—— they found an accord, with one another. Cloud thinks it’s because she’s a mother.

No, it’s not because it’s Kunsel or because it’s for Elmyra.

Kunsel almost begrudgingly has passed over some random roughshod crystal bauble. It’s not valuable, it’s certainly no treasure, nothing to be turned into cash for hard times. If he turns it this way and that, maybe squints his eyes a bit, it looks somewhat like a bear...maybe a Bagnadrana.. or a Dorky Face.

Whatever it is, Kunsel is tight-lipped, obviously uncomfortable. Cloud doesn’t want to know how he knows Cloud goes to Elmyra’s on a somewhat regular monthly basis. (to pick up flowers, to take to the lakeshore in the ancient forest. to offer apologies, ask for forgiveness and penance he doesn’t deserve.)

But it’s Kunsel to Elmyra and the only common ground there is Aerith. He’s not stupid, he can make connections.

This is something he doesn’t know. A part of Aerith’s life he can’t ask about. Can’t talk to her about. Can’t share with her. He’ll never know and he doesn’t have a right to know.

It weighs on him, this yearning. He craves any part of Aerith still left in the world. His memories are faulty, His heart even moreso. What tangible evidence is there of Aerith’s regard for Cloud? for Cloud’s regard for Aerith?

There’s just a grave.

But here Kunsel is with something, because he was precious to her and her to him, and there’s proof. Here in his hands. a little unremarkable trinket, obviously beloved and being passed on to a mother who would cherish it even more than a friend.

A friend…. or…..

Kunsel is right about him.

He doesn’t know anything.

“Yeah, alright,” Cloud agrees and can’t meet Kunsel’s face. He stows away the piece in a secure compartment in his pack where he keeps his spare materia, then turns away to fix a crate of packages onto his motorcycle, feeling his eyes burn and his shoulders curl. “I’ll give her your phone number too, in case she wants to reach out. She got a line recently, so—-“

[heartbreakprincewille]

Love how Simon's feelings for Wilhelm were explored in S2. How Simon was as caught off-guard by the intensity of his feelings for Wille as much as Wille did with his feelings for Simon. How he was in denial for most of S2 that he can feel so much for a boy who hurt him so much. How that same boy can renounce a throne for him if Simon wishes him to. How Wille's "all the people are fake, but I like you and that is not fake" is etched in every moment of Simon's yearning. How Wille is so infused in his system that he subconsciously tries to recreate their moments with Marcus, as if Wille is the blueprint of everything he ever wants.

Just Simon's feelings about Wille.

[justfriendsbestthings]

People: Simon doesn’t love and yearn for Wilhelm as much as Wilhelm loves and yearns for Simon

Meanwhile Simon:

[couturefaith]

wille: “I’m your only son, papa! can you see me?!”

such an amazing line + amazing yet heartbreaking delivery from edvin ryding. all wilhelm wants is to be loved and seen for who he is (as a person, not a prince). his parents are still foolishly incapable of loving him how he deserves. I think this is also what wilhelm yearns for when he says he wants “a normal life”…he wants a family who cares about him. the beautiful twisted irony of it all, most people would at a surface level believe wille has everything (like august believes) because he is a crown prince but in reality, he wants what everyone wants and aside from simon, he has never had anything to or for himself. as a spare, he was secondary to erik…after his late brother, he is still secondary but to the crown which is probably the ugliest truth in all of this…to feel like he is never good enough to his own family.

[grapehyasynth]

au where wilmon don't get back together in the finale, and simon finishes out school in sweden but then moves abroad, tormented everywhere by lost love and strangers' stares and an overall sense of betrayal and rejection by this country he'd never felt totally welcome in. wilhelm tries to be the crown prince but the problems only fester, eating away at his every happiness. at twenty, he steps down from the role. a month later, he goes to visit simon - simon, whom he's barely spoken with in the last three years; simon, who is a depressed shadow of himself, if felice's information from sara is to be believed. wilhelm joins for a small midsommar picnic with a few other swedish expats simon has befriended in his city. one of his friends' daughters makes flower crowns and wille sits beside her on the grass, letting her place finished crowns on his head and around each of his wrists. simon watches and feels a stirring of something, a yearning for home, an understanding that sweden was more than the people who made him feel unwelcome, a hunger for garden parties and pizza on the football sidelines and his mother's hugs. and when he looks at wille, pink in the late evening sun on this longest day, he has to ask himself if all these feelings belong to a past version of himself, or if they remind him of moments he felt most himself

[theaviatorthatcouldnotfly]

no because ex-crown prince wilhelm of sweden once threatened to topple the entire monarchy whilst crouching on a table with his head in his hands because his ex-boyfriend was on a karaoke date with someone else and you’re here crying and yearning for a person who won’t even text you back?

[gatheringbones]

["There's a growing body of published work, including both personal accounts and scholarly research, on how the suppression of non-normative embodiments for the sake of compliance with standards of neuronormative performance (a compliance toward which the neurodivergent are relentlessly pursued throughout their lives) does profound psychological harm to neurodivergent people and is strongly correlated with depression and suicidality. The dominant culture, in other words, pushes neurodivergent people to prioritize passing for "normal" at the expense of their own well-being, mirroring the way that queer people have traditionally been pressured to stay closeted. In the emerging discourse on this issue, the suppression of non-neuronormative embodiments is commonly referred to as masking, and the reclaiming of those embodiments is referred to as unmasking. So it would be entirely accurate to say that neurodivergent unmasking is a form of neuroqueering (one of the most vital forms, I'd argue).

The sort of bodily unmasking I'm talking about here, the reclaiming of previously suppressed ways of moving, can be intense and profoundly transformative. When the suppression has become ingrained unconscious habit (as happens especially when suppression begins in childhood), it's maintained in large part by the layers of deep, chronic unconscious muscular tension which Wilhelm Reich referred to as character armor. Character armor is the bodily component of repression: it serves not only to block the spontaneous performance of various bodily movements and self-expressions, but also to block access to the feelings, yearnings, organismic impulses, and psychological capacities associated with those movements and self-expressions. The process of recovering one's capacity for spontaneous neuroqueer movement is thus deeply and inseparably entwined with both the process of liberating oneself from the chronic tensions of character armor, and the process of recovering and cultivating modes of self-attunement and embodied expression from which one had previously been cut off by those tensions.

The neuroqueer project of reclaiming specific hand movements and stims that one was forced to suppress in childhood is a doorway to broader vistas of neuroqueer practice: in working to reconnect with those movements, one is also reconnecting with and cultivating one's attunements to the inner stirrings, inclinations, and impulses from which such movements emerge. The cultivation of this attunement can develop over time into a vastly expanded repertoire of spontaneous self-expression and a greater capacity to creatively reshape ourselves. Neuroqueering at its best is not only a creative defiance and subversion of both neuronormativity and heteronormativity, but also simultaneously a path toward living more authentically and creatively than the strictures of normative performance would allow."]

nick walker, from neuroqueer heresies: notes on the neurodiversity paradigm, autistic empowerment, and postnormal possibilities, 2021

[reunionatdawn]

My Analysis of the Best Paired Endings in 3H (Part 2: Dimitri/Byleth)

Despite the popularity of some of Dimitri's M/M ships, he seemed to be a typical heterosexual man to me. However, his straightness was actually part of what made his character so interesting, ironically. He spent his youth absorbed in masculine activities like hunting, training, and practicing with the sword.

He was willing to TRY and take Sylvain's advice to pick up girls. But he was very inexperienced with women. Chivalry definitely promotes homoromantic social bonding among men. And perhaps because of that very male-dominated culture he grew up in, he deeply yearned for a relationship with a woman.

The tagline for the game was, "Sweet memories twisted by time's cruel hand". Dimitri's feelings for his stepsister may have been only puppy love, but it was his first time emotionally connecting with a girl. It was one of his sweetest memories. That was why Edelgard's betrayal hurt him so deeply. The emotional core of AM is Byleth taking the spot in Dimitri's heart that Edelgard once held.

The developers did not want to write an entirely different script just to accommodate male Byleth. So, they just took out the Goddess Tower scene, S-Support, and paired ending. The loss of which are a huge detriment to the integrity of the story. Dimileth is just as "canon" as its counterpart Edeleth. I don't even think AM's story or Dimitri's redemption make sense unless there was a romantic connection between those two. Dimitri's Goddess Tower event even foreshadows that specific scene, proving that the moment Byleth reached out her hand was written with romantic undertones.

Byleth being female is an integral part of the story of AM. If Byleth represented the divine masculine in CF, then it follows that she represented the divine feminine in AM. She was a vessel for the soul of the goddess, but more importantly she was a human who could directly intervene in the world and support people with her own flesh and blood.

Dimileth is often criticized for being a simple "fixing the bad boy" straight girl fantasy. But it's less cliche than people give it credit for. Byleth and Dimitri are an interesting blend of masculine and feminine qualities. Byleth is a silent protagonist, but I could tell that Dimitri enjoyed her dry sarcastic sense of humor. She was not a typical healer or pegasus knight like most FE love interests, but a deadly mercenary. She was meant to be similar to Glenn, which is why Felix sees her as his rival.

She serves the role of being Dimitri's sword and shield and stood at his side and protected him during the final battle, filling the knightly role Glenn would have if he had survived (and the role Felix serves in Hopes). She was the Seiros to his Wilhelm. Dimitri is one of the very few male characters that Byleth will give her mother's ring to when she proposes. Yes, it is a woman's ring that Dimitri wears. In fact, Dimitri's whole character arc is about rediscovering and embracing the softer feminine qualities he had as a young boy.

The Professor taught Dimitri how to live. In AG, Dimitri told Shez that from the moment he was born, he never felt like his life belonged to himself. He overworked himself because it was the only way he knew how to live. After Duscur he lost everyone, including his best friend, and his life belonged to their ghosts. The only time he could imagine being happy was upon his death, having devoted his life to forming a peaceful kingdom full of joyful citizens. He yearned for someone to stand by his side and give him a reason to live for himself.

I've seen many people online criticize Dimileth because they say Dimitri already had plenty of people that he was close to in his life and his non-Byleth relationships should have played the biggest role in his redemption. But I disagree. The story made it quite clear that Dimitri's support system was totally inadequate for his emotional needs and could not have pulled him from the abyss.

He was not actually all that close to his childhood friends, even before the Tragedy of Duscur, and he did not confide in them about what he was feeling. He said Rodrigue was the only person outside the castle he was close to. Rodrigue obviously cared for him, but he had not seen Dimitri in two years prior to the academy. Dimitri and Dedue shared a very powerful bond. Losing Dedue was the cause of Dimitri’s initial descent into savagery. But Dedue still insisted on being his vassal instead of his friend and equal.

Felix was obligated to fill the role due to his bloodline, but he did not WANT to be the person Dimitri unburdened his heart to. He was constantly irritable and losing his patience in Azure Gleam. Glenn was one of the ghosts who shadowed Dimitri's every move. And Felix said that since Glenn's death, "his memory has followed me around like a shadow." He hated acting as his brother's replacement. In their AG A-Support, it seemed like he was pretending to like the idea of being the right-hand man because of how dependent Dimitri was on him. We see a direct parallel of that scene in AM where Dimitri is hallucinating in the chapel. While Felix certainly felt compassion for him, he was very eager to foist the role of confidant onto Byleth.

Without anyone to lean on, Dimitri acts pretty monstrous. For five years, he tortured and killed people brutally, as if they were not even human. He threatened to kill Randolph's friends and remove his eyeballs before killing him and we can probably assume that he actually did that sort of thing to his other victims. I related so well with Felix because I felt the exact same mix of disgust and pity towards him.

I didn't ship Dimileth because I self-inserted onto Byleth and I wanted to marry him. I just wanted Byleth to accept him. And I don't find it difficult to believe that she would. Because before she was the stand-in for the goddess, she was the Ashen Demon who cut people down with no emotion. She only began to smile when she started teaching his class. He offered his shoulder to lean on when she lost Jeralt, something the other two house leaders didn't do.

The main ideological conflict between Edelgard and Dimitri was how much they are willing to compromise and accept the unacceptable. Dimitri seemed to understand that Edelgard had legitimate issues with the Church of Seiros as well as the existing world order. But he thought that total destruction of that system would require too much sacrifice. It was an interesting moral quandary.

And honestly, there was no easy answer. In an ideal world, there would be no false religion and no such thing as nobility, period. Even most of the nobles in the cast would have been happier to just be regular people. AM certainly doesn't end in a utopia or anything (although it's less status quo than AG). It was about the characters compromising and making concessions with an inherently unjust system because perhaps taking innocent human life is wrong even if it's for a just cause.

The Crest of Blaiddyd is associated with Strength. The Strength Tarot card is the Major Arcana of inner strength. It represents mastering raw emotions in order to bring calm to yourself or a situation. Dimitri was born on the winter solstice making him a Sagittarius, which is a masculine fire sign symbolized by a centaur. The horse portion of the Sagittarius symbol is unruly, relentless, beastly, and strong. The human portion is wisdom-seeking and rational. Dimitri's character arc was about overcoming his anger and hatred and becoming the wise "Savior King" who could reach out his hand to his mortal enemy.

Byleth & Dimitri The marriage of the newly appointed Archbishop, Byleth, and Dimitri, who officially ascended to the throne of the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus, further delighted the people amidst the celebrations of the end of the war. Continuously seeking a better future for Fódlan, they pursued their ideals, gradually reforming the traditional political systems and the structure of the Church. They upheld their roles as leaders of the Church and the state, engaging in intense debates at times. However, when they went on long rides or hunting trips alone together, they wore not the faces of the Archbishop and the King, but those of an ordinary, loving couple.

JRPGs are known for "killing god". AM ends not with you destroying the church but becoming its leader. The people of Fódlan paid lip service to the goddess, but they actually revered Nemesis and the 10 Elites. So much so that Rhea had no choice but to refer to them as heroes and Crests as gifts from the goddess. Fódlan is a patriarchal land. Faerghus especially so.

With Fódlan unified under Faerghus, Byleth acts as the divine feminine force who will change that society from the inside out, just as she did her husband. Is rulership by a benevolent monarch and a matriarchal pope a good enough ending? Well, that's for the player to decide. But I found it to be the best ending, both for Fódlan and for Dimitri and Byleth themselves.

[maleyanderecafe]

I Tamed My Ex-Husband's Mad Dog (Webcomic)

Created by: CMJM / Jkyum / Jagae(Art)

Genre: Fantasy

I did see this one floating around for a bit, and it is actually pretty good. I generally think that revenge reincarnation stories are a lot better than just general isekai stories because there's a very compelling motive for the female lead in them. The yandere has a bit of an age gap initially with him being a child and the female lead being an adult (though I'll be honest, I've seen and read far, far worse), but does have a time skip to when he's no longer a child. As of currently writing this there is about 30 chapters out right now.

The story starts out with Reinhardt Linckle crying over her recently deceased father, whom she had a strong bond with. Michel Allenkeith, or Reinhardt's husband tries to break off their marriage, with Reinhardt enraged as he was the one who essentially sent her father to his death. The two were engaged to marry every since they were young, but they never really loved each other, with Michel in love with another woman. Reinhardt ends up stabbing Michel in the leg, as she regressed back in time so that she could properly get revenge on him. As a result she is banished to the freezing lands of Luden to die in the cold. The mercenary that brings her to exile attempts to rob and sell her, but is saved by a child. While initially very wary of him, he realizes that he is indeed trying to help her and the two head to Luden to get supplies. Initially he seems reluctant, but as Reinhardt does essentially control this region now (as it's where her mother was born) she gets right into taking care of the people there so they are protected and well fed. Reinhardt finds out that the child that she picked up is Will Cohlonna, the "mad dog" of Michel in her previous life, the one who single handedly wiped out various armies, and decides to use him to get revenge on Michel.

Soon after, Reinhardt gets a visit from a childhood friend (and her first crush) Dietrich. Reinhardt asks Dietrich to help train Wilhelm to become a knight as currently they have a huge shortage of knights (and to later use him to help get rid of Michael), to which he agrees. He's able to convince Wilhelm to fight for Reinhardt's sake (as he has an obvious crush on her). Reinhardt eventually gets Wilhelm to fight for her and gain land so that she can get more resources (after a time skip) giving him the sword that her father has and wrapping a piece of cloth around the handle so that he will always remember her during this time. She ends him and Dietrich out to war so that they can get the land that they need. After a couple of years, Wilhelm and company return successfully, but unfortunately, Dietrich dies during this time. Reinhardt is distraught by the death of Dietrich, but is able to find comfort in Wilhelm, who yearned to see her while he was at war, always thinking about her. We learn that while preparing for the war that Reinhardt sent him on, Wilhelm overhears other soldiers talking about Michel's marriage to the new princess and makes fun of Reinhardt, leading to Michel killing all those who were involved with the mockery. He states that he was killing them for blasphemy against the royal family. Eventually, with Wilhelm's help, Reinhardt is able to attack the nation that cast her out, allowing her to start her revenge on Michel.

Storywise, there is actually quite a lot of political things going on when Reinhardt reaches Luden, especially since at that point people there were basically starving or getting attacked, so she has to find various ways of feeding everyone and, most importantly, getting actual knights to make sure that they are protected. All of this while also planning to invade Michel's country for revenge for her father. Reinhardt really lives up to her name as her character is very put together and ready to do whatever it takes to get her revenge. There were some concerns about Wilhelm and Reinhardt considering that he's about 16 initially and Reinhardt is 22, but considering how fast they had the timeskips and the fact that in the novel it's revealed that Wilhelm also regressed (and is actually older, mentally), it's not too big of a problem, and Reinhardt doesn't really see him as other than a cute little kid until after the timeskip. Works out, I suppose in the end. Wilhelm also looks a lot younger and smaller because of his malnutrition which probably adds to the problem. Anyways, the story is pretty well put together and interesting, seeing how Reinhardt survives and the kinds of tragedies she has to go through, losing not only her father but also Dietrich later on and how vile Michel is, making the eventual revenge on him that much more satisfying.

Wilhelm as a yandere really lives up to his name as the Mad Dog in the previous life. He seems to be able to take down armies on his own even at a young age, being very strong and very loyal just as he was before, only now Reinhardt is using this for her benefit, which he seems to be very aware of in the future. That's not to say that the two don't have affections for each other, but he does know that he is being a tool for Reinhardt and even seems to be content so as long as he's always by her side. It does make me wonder if he somehow got Dietrich killed though considering how jealous he was of him when he first came and saw how close his relationship with Reinhardt was, since we don't actually see him die other than in retellings from other people. He does seem pretty unrelenting to anyone who dare disrespect Reinhardt, killing even the own knights in his army without a thought for disrespecting her. Considering that the also never stopped thinking of her while he was out at war, being very protective of his sword (killing a barbarian he was going to bargin with for touching his sword for instance), it's safe to say you do NOT want to do anything bad to Reinhardt. I can only imagine that it can only escalate from here, considering that Wilhelm is also the bastard son of the king, meaning that Michel could very easily be dethroned if the information were revealed. I am curious what might happen after the entire revenge portion is done, or even just how the relationship between Reinhardt and Wilhelm will be afterwards.

Overall, a very solid beginning for a webcomic. All of the characters are pretty interesting and likable (well, the main characters, I suppose) and the plot seems to know where it's going so it's exciting to see what might happen next. If you are interested in this, please check it out, it is a good webcomic.

[caramelpenguin]

He doesn’t think he’s ever met someone who’s tried this hard to be his friend. Wilhelm waits for him after lessons and choir practice, always making sure there's a seat next to him at workies, or they both move to different seats. He’s almost afraid to tell Rosh that the Prince isn’t what he expected, that he’s actually a little quiet and slightly awkward and his autumn eyes hold an undercurrent of yearning. It’s also very nice to have a friend at Hillerska, so Simon overlooks the weird airiness in his stomach.  He’d be lying if he said it’s not nice to have someone who cares.

I have fics planend for Simon's month but they're not gonna be posted on the days they were meant to be posted because they're not finished😭don't we love when life decides to throw some things your way?

[im-a-king-baby]

hi ! first of all; i read ELYN over the easter weekend and stayed up till like five am waiting for it to get happy so i could sleep (i gave up) and i loved it so so much. It just feels like such a tangible, realistic outcome for them (if we ignore s3) it made me ache in that exact anxious yearning way the actual show does. Big ask and 100% appreciate it if the answer is no but are you planning to write more for them in that universe? Would love to see them when Wille is at university, or see Wille simply make some (oblivious?) uni friends, or see Sara and Simon interact again or honestly literally anything and everything.

secondly, and who knows maybe (probably) you’re aware of this but the photos/images in the fic do not appear as images but just as a text/error box? Is that intentional or did they break? I kept finding myself curious as to what image was put with the chapters haha

Hi!!! I hope you had a good easter... and went to sleep at some point... 😅

Thank you for alerting me about the images! I was not aware of that :( Although I guess that makes all those hours hardcoding the text threads and tumblr posts so they would work without images worth it 😂

I have gone through it all again and updated the image links so they are working for me now (let me know if they're still broken for you?).

There's nothing in them that's required to follow the fic, you just get to judge the time I spent procrastinating by making album covers and then sorting all the random pop songs I'd invented into albums (something that was definitely vital even though no one but me cares about the difference in vibe between Simme eras 🤣).

If you are just interested in the art, these are the 4 covers I used in the fic:

Sadly this fic was always destined to lose canon status after season 3 (although I am going to keep believing August's arc could go the ELYN route until proven otherwise).

Regarding sequels, prooobably not? Sorry :( I have more notes for Simon pov scenes during and before than anything set after because I'm not sure what more I have to say, (other than wanting to write something of ELYN Wille with Edvin's new haircut but basically all I've got is this:

For a moment Simon thinks Wilhelm isn’t even here, then the bleached blond head turns and it’s Wilhelm’s face and Wilhelm’s eyes and Wilhelm’s mouth dropping open in surprise at seeing Simon in the doorway. “You’re here,” Wilhelm says. “How are you -?” “You cut your hair.” It’s dumb. Obviously. But Simon hasn’t slept and Wilhelm’s hair is almost white, sharp and bristled, and Simon wants to touch it, to see if it hurts. “I…” Wilhelm hesitates. “There were always rules about my appearance, about how I was allowed to look, and I thought…” he reaches a hand to his hairline, his face falling a little. “Do you hate it?” The bristles give under his fingers, impossibly soft. He looks older, but also somehow younger, like he’s reclaiming the rebellious teen years that the crown never let him have. “I want to kiss you,” Simon says. The coffee shop is full of people. At least four that Simon can see are looking at them, not even trying to be subtle. There’s a camera tilted in their direction, but it’s not close. “Can I kiss you?” “I-” Wilhelm starts doing the same glance - who’s watching, who’s filming - then seems to catch himself, snorts a soft laugh and pulls Simon in. It's too short for Simon to catch hold of, but he can run his fingers through it and it's soft or ghost them over to catch the sharp edges of the tips, and it's Wilhelm and he's here, they're both here. And they're going to be okay.

<3

[heartbreakprincewille]

I want August to be envious of Wille living his best life with Simon out of the shadows. I want him to be exasperated from all his attempts to cover up his crimes, and look up and see Wilhelm free from facades and lies, living his truth and wonder if that peaceful feeling will ever come to him. Not to a degree that he tries to disrupt Wilhelm's peace once again, but boy do I want him to yearn. I want Wilhelm to flourish in his joy and August regretting the mess that he made of his own life.