You sent me an ask so I shall return the favor! What is the most recent Kpop group you’ve gotten into and how did you find out about them? I always love hearing fan “origin stories” lol
Thank you for returning the favor~ That would be The Boyz 🥰💖 I love hearing fan "origin stories" too hehe (This is gonna get long I love them sm)
Anyways I've known about them since debut? I loved Bloom Bloom Pow with my whole heart when it came out and tried to fall for them then- It didn't work. The next time was when The Stealer (TS) came out~ I had watched them perform for Road to Kingdom- because ptg was on the show too- But I really loved TS cb- sm so that I bought the album about 6 mos later with my favorite members as inclusions at the time (Eric, Kevin and Hyunjae). But nothing came about of it even after watching the weekly idol episodes... Then came Whisper era and I ended up biasing Changmin (Q) and loving that song but again nothing came out of it.
(A little backstory is that Changkyun (I.M) got me into Dominic Fike's music-) Thus, when tiktok showed me Juyeon, Changmin, and Sunwoo dancing to Babydoll earlier this year as a dance cover: I fell. And then I finally checked out Watch It~ But Hui had his solo and it distracted me completely from falling further. Then I had gotten sick and decided 'well, what if I watch their content?' And I did... I watched their hello82 interview and their reaction to fanart of them, and lastly their mafia dance. And I loved each sm that I decided to check out more.
It was the first time I had watched their content and wanted to see more. And now, I watch their content almost daily. It's kind of like they revived the joy of kpop for me? My (old) ult of ults has been on hiatus due to the military so it's been stagnant content lately for me. But then they came in like a breath of fresh air- and I simply can't get enough. This month will be 3 mos and I honestly hope I'll follow them for a long time. (I think they're my new ult of ults tbh)
And lastly now here I am as a Younghoon and Juyeon bias (with bias wrecker: Changmin... he's doing everything to be bias again). And with them having a comeback I loved with my whole heart this past month, I think it really solidified them with me. Honestly, I'm so happy with them.
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videogame series’ are so weird, i cant think of any other media that’s like “We know you liked the first one, so we made another one! no it doesnt continue the plot or even take place in the same canonical world, it’s more like a remake. that we did 23 times. and also we change the lore and mechanics and sometimes even the genre each time”
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I was gonna start this post with “…yeah I don’t know how many words this was before I started writing today” but actually docs was being weird and showed me an earlier version of the document when I first opened it so yeah I do actually know and I wrote 2600 words of one of my wips today.
now this long:
apologies though because it’s still not very fluffy
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24 October 2023 - figuring out how to better my situation and the differences between here and the US
it makes sense why jogging and self-care were easier in the US, with the weather being nicer, having a comfortable bed, having a routine built/supported around others, going to sleep early and a more accessible house layout. what I am confused about is why my body decided it was finally capable of going to sleep early?? like my nephew would get ready for bed around 7:30 and be in bed by 8pm and damn I was actually tired at like 9pm as well! like TIRED tired, like "I don't need my sleeping meds bcs I'm just gonna go pass out" tired which doesn't happen? maybe my body was following the signals of the sun and I was seeing people's sleep routine, and it was helped that the house was quiet except for the TV after 8pm. like the house was silent at midnight and there wasn't anything I was wanting to do anyways, since everyone went to bed early I could get sufficient alone-time to regulate myself.
I was taking my xanax in the mornings instead to deal with sensory overload and the anxieties of the day which I don't usually do, so maybe my body was just physically tired of the input it got through the day? Plus since I was going to bed earlier, I was waking up earlier, but that was a positive experience since it would be waking up with the sunlight and things were calm. I guess here, waking up early means the dark, the cold and running into grumpy roommates getting ready for work. Since I was waking up earlier, I also felt more accomplished and could get some things done before taking a nap at like 10-11am instead of in the afternoon since I'd wake up between 5-7am.
I think kind of the only conclusion I can come to here is that it would really help my lifestyle to be able to move out, and to live on a single floor house (or more realistically, apartment) would be a huge factor in feeling good and my motivation. Ideally having 1-2 roommates that followed a similar daily schedule would really help support mine. I realized how confrontational to my physical limitations it is having stairs in the house, whereas I just don't have stairs in the US so it's one less hurdle that I have.
I also realistically don't want to live in the US; between my inability to drive, disability, medical problems (and associated costs) and my city's crime rate, I'm not sure what things I could compromise on or make feasible. I'd also be living with my dad which while nice, would do some seriously crazy shit to my brain and my internalized beliefs. It would also just be a return without actually working towards my own future, besides taking a break from the weight of my own current shit, I'd still have to deal with all of my shit upon returning back to Belgium.
So I guess my plan is still waiting to hear back from the disability office while trying to find something that gets me out of the house daily and establishing routines, but is still accessible to me. Which is hard when I have a baseline of more responsibilities here and the weather is so so cold so my motivation is lower and pain is higher... Hm the conditions do not seem very in my favor!
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