#yes this album mixes in all these genres | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sefinaa · 24 days

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❝𝐏𝐀𝐂: 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐩𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐮𝐞 𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐜 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐫. 𝐈 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐟𝐭 𝐬𝐨 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫.❞

If you were a song album, what songs would you have?

🐇₊ ⊹ . 🤍 ʚїɞ Masterlist Subliminal Channel Tips

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PAC summary!

ִֶָ☾. Detailed.

࣪ ִֶָ☾. What song titles would you have?

࣪ ִֶָ☾. What genres would it be?

࣪ ִֶָ☾. Why the titles, genres, and what is the meaning of the album?

࣪ ִֶָ☾. Channeled songs.

Moodboard | Divider

Pile I

What song titles would you have?

Three of pentacles reversed.

‘’She was a sexy star.’’

‘’Paint, paint, calm the little one, once a star.’’

“Mad crazy, what a hottie.’’

‘’Butterflies were my favorite, are you one too?’’

“Cute, cute, I'm so cute, yes I am.’’

‘’What did you think would be fair?’’

‘’Alone working tonight.’’

“Gonna have fun being busy with tears in my eyes.’’

“Swift in the rain, nowhere to be seen.’’

“Lost and hurtin’, at least I have you now.’’

“Kiss my ass already.’’

What genres would it be?

The lovers reversed

Rock, pop, or a mixture of those two with folk.

Why the titles, genres, and what is the meaning of the album?

A lot of you like to mix and match your aesthetic and personality, not for the sake of others but because you believe it helps you heal from certain situations. The problem comes from your limited knowledge about how your mind works and what works best for you. As you go through a situation, you become lost around yourself and detach from parts of yourself. And as things keep occurring, you keep removing who you once were. There were times you sought to bring yourself back again, but the fear of remembering the past has eaten you. You are scared to see your past again. People think you move on fast, but that’s a lie; you have not moved on from the past, you ran away. Your past is your reminder for your faults, and you beat yourself up. You have become your own shamer and decided it would be best to have this personality of yours. Yet, you are struggling to show compassion for others despite going through with what they did. You went through the same thing and yet shamed them for it while ultimately doing the same thing with yourself. You kind of have this mindset of, I don’t remember it, but I will act like I did and move on with my life. I don’t think you see it or understand that it’s damaging your heart and mind. You have embraced your darkness.. But that’s all there is to your personality. A lot of you have family members who are concerned for your outbursts and rebellion. It’s completely new to them, and instead of explaining your reasonings.. Which you have no idea about, you push them aside and cause ruckus for everyone that adores you. You only have qualities of your darker sides; some of your lighter sides are trying to come back into your life, but you have kicked them away. You were insecure with them and believed your darker side was better, yet they were equally the same. People have too many misconceptions of the light side being weak and the dark side being stronger when it doesn't matter. When you have a balance between them, you become stronger. You are naturally confident, you can show love to others without becoming the victim of toxic people, and you mind your business. You become intelligent and cunning, but never use it for ill intentions. That was something you wanted, but believed the darker parts of yours were your friend. In a way they are, but you have used those parts in the wrong manner.

A lot of the song titles were focused on confidence and loving yourself, but some of them were also gloomy. Do you see the meaning behind those titles? “What did you think would be fair, alone working tonight, gonna have fun being busy with tears in my eyes, swift in the rain, nowhere to be seen, and lost and hurtin’, at least i have you now.’’ Sure, you ooze natural confidence, but at what cost? The cost of being alone, sobbing yourself at night, wishing you never did this to yourself, and losing yourself in the process because your past hurt you too much? Our past helps us not make the same mistakes again; making the same mistake isn’t a bad thing. It’s beautiful if you see it from another perspective. You need it to see it from a healthy perspective. Yes, the mistakes we make hurt us, but without actually understanding where the mistakes actually came from.. Or why it was caused in the first place, or even how you can learn from it.. You can never truly grow and become a butterfly.

And once you are able to heal from this and bring yourself back from it, you will genuinely tell those who have hurt you to ‘’kiss your ass already.’’ This is why your genre was rock, pop, or with a mix of folk. You will have a lot of spirit during your growth and healing journey, as folk music is relaxing with some beats going up at different moments. That's how you have felt with your journey. It feels chaotic sometimes, and sometimes you wonder if it's worth it in the end. Yet you know in your heart it's worth having the hope you have been painfully crushing and grabbing on since you were a kid. Don't feel the need to grab on that hope; let it go and allow it to come into your body naturally.

Three of cups.

You are also swimming around the surface of finally getting where you have always wanted to, but you must take that final step. Something felt missing with your reading as I finished hearing your channeled songs. You have people who want to see you blossom and have your true self back. But are you ready to become them? Are you ready to move past and stop idolizing your darkness and learn that having some light to you isn't a bad thing? That it’s rather beautiful. Are you even ready to embrace yourself once more and become a butterfly? Are you ready to create a beautiful masterpiece through your love for music, or would you rather keep composing the same music and making the same mistake without a potential to grow into a beautiful composer?

Channeled songs

It girl - Aliyah’s Interlude (before healing)

Harpy Hare - Yaelokre (after healing)

Masterlist ʚїɞ

Pile II

What song titles would you have?

‘’Fast and furious.”

‘’Come on the top.”

“We ride it all night till we party till death.”

“Kill the lady, she done no wrong.”

“Murder on my mind, can’t stop it no more.’’

‘’Soak it all up, we wildin’ all night long.’”

“I’LL KILL YOU ALL TONIGHT! Maybe a bit later, I’m a bit lazy, so tired.’’

What genres would it be?

Queen of swords.

Phonk, and some metal. I also hear elegant pop. Pop music that sounds way too fine and elegant. You ooze the feeling of showing too much natural confidence, and people think that you are playing around.

Why the titles, genres, and what is the meaning of the album?

The chariot reversed, ten of cups reversed, knight of cups reversed, six of swords reversed, and two of wands.

You have gone through a period of pain. People have made you doubt yourself, and you were surrounded with people who adored manipulating you. People thought you would be easy to manipulate because you appeared weak, when that was far from the truth. However, those that were closest to you knew that people were like that with you, and instead of showing genuine love for you, they let it happen to you. Even though you were able to deal with most of the social manipulation, you still had to deal with the betrayal. And those feelings have caused a lot of anger surrounding your heart. Sometimes you think about hurting the people that were closest to you, but then you remind yourself that you want to do better and be better. To be on top and work hard to achieve your desires. But sometimes those thoughts reappear and make you think otherwise. And then you beat yourself up on it when it’s not necessary. You are allowed to feel anger, and you are allowed to feel like you deserve justice. You can feel these thoughts. But you have to remind yourself how deserving you are to feel these emotions and talk about them with yourself so your mind can stop overriding itself from how you are harsh with yourself. Stop allowing yourself to nitpick everything about yourself; would you do it to your favorite character? A lot of you love anime and have a crush on a fictional character, and you fantasize they can never do wrong with you. Why don’t you make that into a reality with yourself? Do no wrong to yourself and show yourself some compassion. Show the love you needed as a kid to yourself.

With ten of cups reversed and knight of cups reversed, tarot tells me that you are causing yourself resentment with yourself. You keep insulting your future self. You keep making yourself feel anger because you are adamant that if your future self does something different, they are useless, a c*nt, or they won’t gain your love. The thing you must understand is that just because your present self wants this in the present moment does not MEAN your future self is interested in that. People always grow out of their shells, and your future self will do the same. They will want things differently because they learn things differently. They know more about what they want in their present moment because they were able to grow. Don’t you seek that growth, or are you too scared of change and desire to stay where you are? Daydreaming about these fictional characters because you are too scared to face reality. The idea of escaping feels better to you, yet it drains you. That’s why your genre would be PHONK or metal. Aside from the actual genre, understand it from a literal direction. Phonk is different rhythms and beats combined to make something sound good, but there is no voice. You lack voice with yourself as your mind has already become chaotic because you won’t do the things you actually want and instead procrastinate it and wonder why things are not changing. And metal would be screaming. You are screaming to yourself, hence the murder parts in the title for the things you want, but it goes in vain because you want things to be summarized. You want things to be done in a flash so you do not actually have to do the work. Your attention span to your life has worsened so much, not because you use your phone so much or your gaming devices. But because you don’t even listen to yourself. Your friends hurt you; you knew people treated you badly—how about yourself? You think it’s okay to be an ass to yourself just like those that hurt you? Be kinder to yourself and become your own best friend. If you don’t, you will only get hurt at the end, just as knight of cups reversed says.

Six of swords reversed says the same thing here. You know you must make a change in your life, but you won’t because you fear finding purpose in your life. You must understand you make your own purpose, your own destiny, and you can make your own choices. You cannot control external factors, only internal ones. So learn to take care of your thoughts and become the best person for yourself. Learn to become brave to face your fears and use your comfort character to help you do the things you want. Take baby steps in becoming productive, and don't push yourself on day one. Think about an anime. At the start, it’s usually calm, sometimes boring, but it never truly gets into the climax. This is where you will learn to figure out what routine you want and what works best for you. Understand what you want to do with your life and how to make sure you relax and take care of your needs. Removing people that do not serve you no longer, removing attachments, showing kindness to yourself, etc. Then comes a situation occurring during the anime that will finally lead to the climax. But this is where you must take the leap, take a risk, and go for what you want. It could be finding a lover that suits what you want just as your comfort character or fictional crush. It could be finding better friends, learning to fall in love with yourself, learning how to cook or go to your dream school, maybe a dream school or college, etc. And then finally the anime goes to its climax, and it becomes very interesting. Yes, there are ups and downs, but it’s interesting, is it not? This is where your ups and downs will occur, but since you are already well equipped with what you did previously, you are able to handle it because you have learned to be courageous, just as the two of wands show. Maybe a situation occurs and you do not like it and want to relapse into the same situation, but don't. The ending is finally coming, and it’s usually peaceful; if not, there is always a cycle that must end before peace comes.

Channeled songs

Hold up - Beyoncé

XO - Beyoncé

Masterlist ʚїɞ

Pile III

What song titles would you have?

‘’I don’t want to do this.’’

“It’s too much work—wanna procrastinate.’’

“Something is dark within’, whatcha got for it?’’

“Shadows.’’

“Ocean consumed us. It consumed you, didn't it?’’

What genres would it be?

Dark metal and Gloomy Pop with a hint of rap.

Why the titles, genres, and what is the meaning of the album?

Ace of pentacles, three of cups, six of wands (reversed), king of cups, and temperance (reversed).

You recently went through a breakup with someone abusive.. to a certain degree. Others have blamed you as the bad person even though you know it wasn’t the truth. You saw through their lies, and you saw how others had pinned you to be bad. To others, how can your ex be someone good if they were this innocent or shy angel? “It’s simply impossible.” The idea of doing revenge on them crossed your mind, but you have pushed it aside each time. Now, you are struggling if you should do it or not and are looking for answers everywhere and decided to ask a higher being you believe in or trusted tarot readers. However, they keep giving you answers you don’t want, so you cuss them out, moving on to the next. Listen to them.

I am not saying revenge is not the answer; I am not saying anything. I would rather speak to you in an unbiased manner. What is revenge for you? Revenge can be a revenge glow-up, finally having your dream life, or it could be hurting the people who hurt you or killing them. Everyone has a different meaning for revenge, but what does it really mean to you? Ace of pentacles talks about a new beginning, why don’t you use this opportunity and make a name for yourself? Stop procrastinating the things that have scared you and go do it instead. Sure, it will take some time disciplining yourself to get into that mindset, but in the future, you will thank yourself. The titles I channeled for you all aimed to someone else or something else. What are you hiding from yourself? What are you so scared to admit to yourself that you have to hide in the shadows?

There was a moment of happiness for you when the relationship occurred. You gave them the world, always healed for them, always did better for them, and wanted to have a common goal with them. But instead of a common ground with them, what did they do to you? Used you to ruin your reputation and then run away when you mentioned that goal. And now the people you loved turned against you, and you have nothing now.

Nothing to lose.

You have nothing to lose, so why don’t you give it your all and gain something this time? You are at a point where you can do whatever you want because there are no consequences. None at all. What did you want so badly during your relationship that you postponed it for their sake?

With six of wands (reversed), the card focuses on how you should not expect success each time. You have tried to reach for what you want, but each time you did, you didn’t set realistic goals. You expected a better outcome each time but never learned your lessons. Sometimes people become too excited because they have opportunities to grow and get to a better environment, but they forget how hard it is to get there. To get where you desire, you might have to hike for hours upon hours to see a beautiful sunset or view. Some people would call it dangerous and stupid, some would say it’s a waste of time and others would find it to be a great idea. Focusing on someone’s ideals isn’t what you should thrive for. Thrive for what you want instead. Learn to stop caring about what others’ say about you.

I am aware that everyone says it all the time, but they never give the person a direction to start, so when those thoughts arise, simply tell yourself that you do not care. That you do not care what others say to you. Keep saying this as doubts appear, and you will start to believe it. And as you do this, allow yourself to do the things you want to do again, but without any expectations. Set realistic goals. Let’s say you want to get an A on your chemistry exam. What goals do you have in mind already? Why not just strive for a B? Maybe a B is average or not good enough, but your knowledge is not based on a letter; it’s based on what you know later on. So maybe you didn’t do so well and got a C because of nerves and failed your goal. So what? Get back up and do it again until you get your B and then strive for a B+. Eventually, as you do it, you will understand you are capable of doing better and improving; you will learn how to be kinder to yourself and also learn better for the future.

As for why you have those genres or titles, it’s rather self-explanatory. To explain it shortly, you didn’t want to do something again because of your fear of failure and the expectations you had. (’’I don’t want to do this. It’s too much work—wanna procrastinate’’). Your abusive ex made your life a living hell, and you tried to help them become better as you were healing yourself to do better for them. You gaslighted yourself, thinking it was your fault when it was theirs. (“Something is dark within’, whatcha got for it?’’). The ocean ‘’consumed’’ the both of you, when in reality it was just them and their dark soul. It made you think worse of yourself, and you became more sensitive to the world. Letting people walk over you and make yourself start prioritizing others, thinking that is what was necessary when you were genuinely perfect the way you were when you had already healed. (“Ocean consumed us. It consumed you, didn't it?’’). Dark metal and gloomy pop is how you have been feeling lately, and your mind has been running in circles trying to understand everything, which is why rap was added. Taking those genres in a literal fashion instead of what it truly is about.

Since the meanings are self-explanatory, I do want to add something from my side. None of it is channeled, and think of it as a small message from me to you.

Sometimes we know what is best for us, and we try to strive for it. Sometimes we think it’s the final answer, but it usually isn’t. You can keep looking for answers, but it will consume you and make you drown for more. Sometimes peace is better than knowing the answer. Having peace of mind is better than knowing the answer. We don’t know why people who are like your ex do the things to us, but what I have learned is that they are hurting, but they are taking it on the wrong people. Sometimes you want to help them improve and change, and they become triggered, so they lash on you. Know that it’s not your fault for what they did to you. Just because they were hurting doesn't mean you deserve what they did to you, and you never will, not even for your past and the guilt and shame that is still lingering on. People can be assholes and never go through trauma, or they can be ones and go through one, but sometimes they go through something and it changes them for the better or for the worse. Don’t focus on the other person in this aspect; think about what you would do with that experience, and if it does occur to you, have faith in yourself to handle it just like you would have thought. You had a rational mindset during it, and it was unbiased, and maybe it wasn’t the same understanding, but it was still unbiased of how you would handle it. Even when situations like those don't arise, instead of listening to your heart in those painful moments. Take some time to think and then address it. Even if they ridicule and make fun of you because you are not talking or answering back, know that you are being rational and won't have any regrets in the end. Those tips have been helpful for me, so I would hope they would do the same for you.

Take care of yourself, and don’t blame yourself for that scumbag’s wrongdoings.

Channeled songs

Friends - BloodPop and Justin Bieber

In the Shadows - The Rasmus

Masterlist ʚїɞ

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marshallsgirl · 7 months

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Marshall revealing his new song to Y/N

Pairing: Eminem x Fem¡Reader

Warnings: 🔞 MATURE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK

Recommended song: Remind Me - Eminem, In Too Deep - Eminem

Author's note: Hey, guys! I was so bored and I wrote this. I may delete it later or idk. Hope you all enjoy it. I love you guys so much! Sending all of you a warm hug🫂🤍

■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■♡■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■

"I have a surprise for you" Marshall said to me as he enter the living room. Inmediatly I turn off the tv and give all my attention to him. "Guess what" he said.

"What?"

"The song is complete!"

"Whoa baby!"

Here's the thing. He told me he was writting a song about us, but that's it. He didn't talk about ever again. Even if I asked him about it he had changed the topic. So, I was very nervous about it. Because this has happened before. It was with the Revival album. That one song called Remind Me. That one was for me. I still remember when he show me that song.

" did you...That's my fav rock&roll song!" I said when I heared the beat.

"Yeah, that's the song you kept singin' and singin' while you're cooking" he said wanted to laugh at me.

I loved that song. Perfect combination but it was crazy. I mean...he did that for me? He united rock&roll and rap that was so crazy.

"Damn, that's crazy babe" I said.

"See y/n, u make me do things I normally wouldn't do"

"Awww, I love it and I love you baby!"

So, this time I was really nervous because I've been singin' a lot and very different genres. And Marshall...Well, he is so crazy. I didn't know what to expect.

"Are we going to the studio?" I asked him ready to go change if needed.

"No, let's just get in the car". So, we got inside his car. "Are u okay?" suddenly he asked me.

"Yeah, I'm good! I need to hear your song!"

I got too excited and I get very excited when I'm nervous I don't know why, but It's like I got a lot of energy all of the sudden. Anyways, so he says:

"Okay, okay but you need to know that I just got the final mix and I haven't heard it. I mean I know the entire song but I didn't hear the final mix yet" he explained.

"Omg..."

"What?"

"Wait, let me just make myself comfortable" I said while adjustin' my seat a little bit.

At this point he doesn't even hide that he's laughing at me.

"Ready?"

"Yeah, ready"

"Wait, look at me" he ordered and I obey. "I love you"

"Okay, now play the song!"

"Yo, say it back!" he replied.

"I love you, babe!"

And so the music started and he is lip singin': "This could never work, " is what we said at first. But whatever this is, it's working. But we're in two different worlds and (yeah) I'm not your husband (nah), you ain't my girlfriend. All I know is that (what?) When I'm with you, I'm a different person, yeah. And I ain't never met a chick as perfect. Girl, you're a ten, so here I am (yeah)

I literely screamed and Marshall had to stop the music.

"No, keep it goin'!" I argue.

He laughed and let the music continue: ...Can't tell if I'm cheating on her with you or cheating on you with her. But really, nobody's at fault, can't help who you love. Hope they don't ever hear us talk

'Cause we both are getting sloppy. Probably subconsciously part of me's hoping we get caught 'cause I'm not happy here (nah)

With her. Rather have you (yeah) Rather have me too. 'Cause you're not happy there (you're not happy there) With him. Rather have me (I know, but) We just in too deep (I'm in way too deep)

Marshall started singin' it out loud and I was vibin' with it the whole time. It was a good damn song. Honestly, I loved it. It truly was about us, about the start of our relationship, but there were a few things that weren't true like me havin' a wedding ring. It should say: I got a wedding ring. So it's her instead of you.

"That's it. What do u think?" he said not being able to stop smilin'

"Please, play the song one more time"

And he started to laugh again.

"Marshall!"

"Are for real? Did you loved it?" he was surprised.

"Yes, I love it!"

"Y/n..." he laughs again.

"Marshall! You're being so freakin' annoying. Play the song one more time!"

"Yo, you are just sayin that. You didn't loved it!"

"What? I do love it! Marshall!"

"Okay, okay"

He played the song again.

"I'm gonna cry" I said.

"Yo, you're hillarious!"

"That song is good as hell!"

#eminem #eminemslimmarshall #marshall mathers #slim shady #the real slim shady #rap god #eminem pics #marshall mathers x y/n #marshall mathers x reader #marshall mathers imagine #eminem imagine #eminem x reader #eminem x y/n #eminem x you

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ferrstappen · 2 years

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loving him is red l Charles Leclerc Imagine

a/n: it’s been YEARS since I've written something but I have too many ideas and time so I'll give it a try again <3 any feedback is appreciated and than you for reading <3

also, of course the only song I could think of is Red by Taylor Swift (taylor’s version ofc)... I mean... how could I not?

genre: fluff.

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x female singer!reader.

summary: Charles’ girlfriend receives her first Grammy for Song of the Year, sadly enough the inspiration behind the song isn’t able to make it to the ceremony.

“This feels so wrong, I should be there to support you... You’re always here for races and shit” Charles said while watching her get ready on a fancy hotel room, meanwhile he was stuck in Maranello.

“Please don’t, it’s pre-season and all that, you know they needed you there today. Plus, I'll be home by tomorrow so we can celebrate... or you can console me since I'm probably losing anyway.” (Y/N) quietly said the last part while sipping some expensive sparkling wine her assistant brought to the room.

“You are not losing! Babe, how many times do I need to tell you that?” Charles sounded truly exasperated with his girlfriend, like he truly had told her many many times.

Truth be told, she never thought she would be considerate at all. Yes, her label had submitted her second album and the first single of the record, but they were almost obligated to do so, it was an unspoken rule in the music industry that you just had to do the entire “for your Grammy consideration” portfolio if you wanted to be taken seriously, but (Y/N) never really thought the song she first released from her album would be such a hit.

Honestly, they just were words her heart could think of whenever she saw Charles, because he truly was red... In the way he wore the color so proudly, from the way his car was always a shiny red even when he was driving it in the driest of the deserts, to the way he loved her so passionately, fearlessly and undoubtedly... He was red.

It never made sense to her that millions around the world would mix her lyrics on Ferrari t-shirts or that fans would wait for Charles on the stands with bright red lyrics of the song.

He loved it, by the way. He would flush a bright red whenever someone on the grid teased him about it, pretended he was shy about everyone knowing those words were for him, but his heart would sing a little every single time he listened or read the verses meant for him, just as he would make sure the camera would capture your cute face over FaceTime when he got a podium and you couldn’t be here, or how he made sure to tell you his best joke when you’d arrive to the paddock holding hands, loving the way the photographers captured your laugh and the glint in his eyes just by being the reason of your smile.

He had the superior relationship and he just knew it, and he made sure the rest of the word knew it as well.

“So, are you finally going to show me the dress?” Charles said while putting his headphones on to ignore the world outside of his driver’s room.

She cheekily smiled. “No, not really” She told him, earning a dissatisfied groan from him.

“Then when do you want me to see it? On TV like the rest of the world?” He argued, his accent getting thicker.

“Actually yes, that’s exactly what I was thinking.” (Y/N) was going to keep talking, but her assistant let her know the dress had just arrived and they needed her full attention.

“No, I heard that! You can mute me and I’ll just watch over here!” Charles pleaded, earning a heartily laugh from her girlfriend.

“I’m so sorry, bebé. I have to go, but you can watch me on TV though!”

Charles sighed, unable to hide his grin. “You know I'll be glued, I don’t care about the time or anything,” even through his noise-cancelling headphones he could hear a big commotion outside his room, meaning someone would come knocking on his door soon. He took a deep breath before focusing his eyes on his muse again. “I love you so much, chérie. I’m so proud of you and whatever happens tonight doesn’t change that. Please whatever you need I'll have my phone at all times, I’m capable of stoping the car in the middle of nowhere and you know it,” they both laughed. “I’m right there with you, I love you.”

She repeated the same words over and over again, feeling a bit numb as several people helped her fitting the red Maison Valentino dress to perfection. It was a whirlwind from there, the last glance she took of herself in the mirror was to make sure the small prancing horse shaped stud earrings, a nod to her man watching on tv.

As if writing a Grammy nominated song and almost an entire album about him wasn’t enough...

Her hands couldn’t help the tingling on the palm of her hands, her body knowing she was missing her other half; he always needed to fix his tie or style a stubborn strand of hair, and it always calmed her nerves to take care of him.

Back in Italy, Charles was anxiously watching the TV in front of him, some friends, including Carlos, were sitting around the living room, mindlessly chatting about some of the artists performing on the Grammys, what were the plans for the night, the next Real Madrid game...

But Charles eyes were trained on his girl smiling in front of the TV, feeling giddy as she gracefully walked down the carpet on her silky red dress, eyes shining and smile intoxicating.

The night flew by and Charles swore he could feel your hand squeezing his as they announced the category he had been waiting for. Harry Styles was on the stage with the envelope.

Everything went by so quickly, Charles didn’t notice his friends had shut up and were with their eyes trained on the TV. They all collectively gasped when the brit announced Red by (Y/N) as the song of the year.

Then it was just noise; from the TV, from people cheering on the theatre as she hid her face on the palm on her hands, to the living room where Charles had rose to his feet hugging everyone around him.

To anyone on the outside it would’ve seemed like their country had won the World Cup.

“God, I don’t know how to begin,” She shakily said while holding the gramophone. “I know I’m supposed to say that this is for my fans and my label and everyone who believed in me, and it is but...” She smiled to herself. “This is for you, the inspiration behind every word, every verse, every note. My incredible boyfriend who makes my heart sing and my life happy. They haven’t invented the words to tell you how much I love you,” She could feel tears building on the corner of her eyes, until she saw a stage producer informing she only had ten seconds left to wrap up her speech. “God, just ten seconds? Thank you so much to everyone, Char I love you with my entire heart, and thank you to everyone for this I’ll always have this moment in my heart, even after I’m gone I’m sure this is gonna be engraved. Thank you!”

The camera captured her glistening eyes as she smiled through the lens. Charles had unshed tears as his heart was beating loudly. Only seconds passed until his phone was vibrating with an incoming FaceTime call.

“So... Did you like the red dress?” She joked and he laughed through the unshed proud tears. He never knew he could feel so much pride and love for another person.

He chuckled. “I loved it, and I love you so much words cannot explain. Fuck, how come I wasn’t there?”

Their love was red.

#charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc fluff #charles leclerc au #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc one shot #charles leclerc x you

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jealousmartini · 2 months

Text

KPOP DR INTRODUCTION

Old opening intro:

" Don't freak out! We are O.M.G! "

New opening intro:

" 6 friends and a dream! We are O.M.G "

╭╔═════════════♱═════════════╗

[ # 000 :: O.M.G's ORIGIN STORY ] small print

O.M.G, is an originally animated six-member girl group created in late 2013 by Lucia Martinez, or better known as "Keisha" from her character in O.M.G, under her youtube channel "Envious Martini" accompanied by her 5 other girlfriends for fun. They would post a lot of vlogs, grwm (get ready with me's), mukbangs, reaction/commentary, and livestreams, of course, none of these posts were ever serious. And a lot of their videos would be clipped to be used as memes that would instantly catch fire, and their faces would soon be very recognisable. In fact It wouldnt even take long for O.M.G to earn a lot of attention from Korean and Western K-POP fans when "Molly (claimed song!! playboi carti)", which is a scrap unreleased track by the way, would randomly go viral at 2.3 million views on youtube and Envious martini would begin to grow a humble following of 430K followers for their music, art and shitposts.

All music production, concepts, and choreography were created by Keisha with the help of the 5 girls behind the scenes. For example, in order for Keisha to be able to animate the choreography, the girls would make dance routines together, figuring out positions and record it for Keisha to take as reference. This also went for vocals and rapping. All girls played their parts accordingly to how they felt comfortable and were suitable to each member. And then it would be in mid-June of 2014 that the girls would decide to bring Keisha's art to life and replace the characters of O.M.G with themselves.

And in 2015, after being invited to many interviews and talk shows and entering many survival shows and competitions, it would be one competition show in particular, held by JYP which O.M.G would win, where they would officially be adopted under JYP entertainment and debut as a JYP girl group in the same year. But it wasn't until 2016 after much debate surrounding the group that O.M.G. was finally recognised and accepted as a KPOP group.

[ # 001 :: ALBUMS ]

[ disclaimer!! claimed songs are highlighted, and said songs most likely sound slightly different in my dr because of personal taste.]

Core genres :: KPOP, EDM, JERSEY CLUB, POP-ROCK, SYNTH, ELECTRO-POP, CONTEMPORARY R&B

Core aesthetics/concepts :: GIRL CRUSH, Chaotic academia core, Y2K, Girl-next-door

Themes :: Teenage years/Nostalgia, Self discovery, Love/self love, Random stuff

(2013) Mini album 1 :: Superstitious

Tracklist :: "track no.1", "track no.2", "track no.3"

(2014) Mini album 2 :: Lawfully Wedded Wives

Tracklist :: "What's your number", "Molly", "Greedy hearts", "girls never die", "heaven sent", "kinda miss you rn"

(2015) Debut Album :: Oh My Gosh

Tracklist :: "OMG", "Magnetic", "Ditto", "Lucky girl syndrome", "Dalla Dalla", "Woo! Ah!", "ETA"

Debut song :: Ditto

(2016) 1st Single :: Princess Sickness

(2017) 2nd Album :: New Region

Tracklist :: "La di da", "Supernova", "Crush", "life on Mars" , "JOYRIDE",

(2017) 3rd Album :: GINXED

Tracklist :: "Girls on wings", "LOOP", "Serotonin", "WOW", "Bitternes, the disease", "Yes, and?", "Charmed", "LOVE DIVE", "Accendio"

(2019) 4th Album :: Hopscotch

Tracklist :: "Six of em", "1 on 1", "Now what", "Super mario", "Jersey Girls", "Sir mix a lot", more to come...

(2019) 5th Album :: Joyride

Tracklist :: "Insidious", "It's my turn now", "Trance", "met her on the internet", more to come...

(2021) 6th Album :: TOTALLY MAXED OUT

Tracklist :: "I'm your magical girl", more to more...

[ # 002 :: SOLO PROJECTS ]

(2019) Debut Solo Single :: "Make way"

(2021) 1st Solo mini Collection :: Come again?

Tracklist :: "It's my turn now", "He ate my heart", "WTF?"

(2023) 4th Solo Single :: "My Chemical Romance feat. Megan the Stallion"

(2024) 5th Solo Single :: "ABCD feat. NAYEON"

(2024) 6th Solo Single :: "Boohoo"

(2024) 7th Solo Single :: "New Woman feat. CHAE KYUNG"

╰╚═════════════♱═════════════╝

╭╔═════════════♱═════════════╗

[ # 000 :: BASIC INFO ]

Date of DR :: ??/04/2017

Name :: Lucia R. Martinez

korean birthname :: Hwang Chae-Kyung

adopted name :: Lovely adopted surname

nicknames :: Kyu, Kyungie, Keish/Keesh, Chae-Bae, Vivi

Stage name :: Keisha/Kyu

Title names :: THAT girl, Mother Rabbit, Millionaire Maknae, KPOP's Princess, KPOP's Darling, KPOP's first Black Idol, KPOP'S secret ACE, KPOP's curly head, KPOP's BEYONCE

Positions :: Producer, Main/lead singer, main dancer, sub rapper, visuals, maknae, center maybe??

Date of birth : 20 / 06 / 1997

Age :: 19

Hobbies :: Music production, drawing, dancing, singing, baking, gaming

Languages :: English, Korean, Spanish, Portuguese, French, Mandarin Chinese

Ethnicity :: half puerto rican, half korean

Representative animal :: red panda / puppy / Bunny (I can't choose rn guys)

Representative colour :: orange

Representative dessert :: cookies and brownies

Fanbase name :: charmings

Training period :: ?? months

Company :: JYP

Group representative colours :: Blue and Pink

Brands :: Vivian Westwood, Diesel, Juicy Couture

[ # 001 :: FUN FACTS ]

She is older than Jungkook by 4 months. He knows this but still chooses to not use honorifics sometimes.

She is close friends with NAYEON, Sana, Chaeyoung, YOONGI, JIMIN, JUNGKOOK, Namjoon, J-hope, TAEHYUNG, Jin, BANGCHAN, Felix, Hyunjin, YUNA, Jennie, Jisoo, Tsuyu, WONYOUNG, YUJIN,

No one knows this yet but she has a crush on 6 of the idols listed and 2 of the highlighted names are part of the six, the other 4 are not

The red panda is her animal representative because there was a video circulating of her dressed up as a mascot for her highschool as a red panda and break-dancing

Speaking of dancing, she has mastered multiple dancing styles like house, vogue, street dancing, belly dancing, Jazz, Latin, Club, Jersey and Freestyle. She's got her own signature groove 💃🏾 🕺

She is the first kpop idol to be the ambassador for Vivian Westwood, Juicy Couture and Diesel

[ # 002 :: CONTROVERSIES AND SCANDALS ]

Next post...

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#kpop shifting #shiftblr #desired reality #master manifestor #law of assumption #4d reality #shifters #loa #shifting #drself #loa blog #reality shift #reality shifting #shifttok #shifting blog #shifting community

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dalamjisung · 11 days

Text

A muted shade of green ✧ Chapter 4: Pushing the limits

genre: mostly fluff... with a tiny bit of angst because I just can't not write angst LMAO

word count: 5861

pairing: reader x spencer reid

description: for once, you have a good day. and you feel untouchable. until, that is, you're not.

a muted shade of green masterlist

previous chapter // next chapter

author's note: sorry for the delay on the update, but it's finally here! I'm excited to see this story evolving! what are you excited about with this chapter? Let me know in the comments! <3 if you want to join the taglist for this series, please let me know in the comments!

It’s weird to think that once upon a time, you lived in New York.

You had always loved the city in all its might. A lot of people complained about the grey, tall buildings, but you used to think that the colour suited you. That the lifeless of it all didn’t really matter, because life was all over New York City. The bustling of the people, the voices and languages mixing in every block, the smell of food from the falafel carts in every corner; sure, the city was dead, but my god were the people alive.

You were alive, back then.

So much so that you think you might have attracted the dead, because the night you met Josh was a night you felt invincible. You felt like you had enough power in you to light up the entire grid of the city that never slept, so when he approached you, with his light blonde hair and bright blue eyes, you were up for the challenge. Even your friend was impressed when you didn’t coil away from his eager hands, and maybe she regrets it now– maybe she curses herself for not pulling you away from him, for not stoping you when you left with him. Maybe she hates herself for what she let you do back then, but the truth of the matter is that even if she had tried, you don’t think she would’ve succeeded.

Josh was different than most guys you knew, but that didn’t mean much– your aversion to human interaction had always plagued you when it came to romance and friendships. Alas, you found your similars; you met people who loved book just as much as you and you found your place with a selected few. You didn’t mind, not having all that many friends when you had an amazing handful instead; they were all loyal, understanding, and kind, much like you.

Meaning that Josh wasn’t. But you didn’t know that at first, too blinded by the flowers, and the expensive dinners, and the beautiful gifts. Whenever you remember them– the moments, the memories, the things– you’re washed by a sense of shame and embarrassment unlike anything else you felt before. You’d like to stand up for yourself and deny it, deny all of it, say you’re not materialist like this, but that would be a lie. You are a bookseller, for crying out loud. A collector. For you, mementos mean something; the feeling of something familiar in your hands, be it the weight or the texture or just the shape, enough to bring back moments that are long gone in the hands of time. Objects and souvenirs are the next best thing you have to a photo album of memories that can’t be captured by a camera, and you are not ashamed of it.

What you are ashamed of was how easily you fooled yourself for him. For Josh. It was all those damned fairytales you’ve read growing up, it had to be. Or maybe it was his friends and their comments of how perfect you two were together. Whatever it was, it had to be something. You’d hate to believe that you were shallow enough to endure him on his worst days just because of the things he gave you on his good days.

Naturally, Josh was a much more extroverted personality. Keeping up with his social life was exhausting. Every night there was something to do, a dinner, a party, a meet-up. And those weren’t all that fun, either, though you learned to fake it pretty well. During these public appearances, you let yourself believe that yes, you two were this amazing power couple. You allowed yourself a moment to push away from all the regret and just enjoy the small things– the touches, the fleeting kisses, the loving nicknames. Because you knew that once you got home, all of that would fade and disappear until the next event you’d be forced to attend.

The question that most people asked was why did it take so long for you to leave him, why did it have to be that bad before you allowed yourself to go; and the answer was always the same: you don’t know. You don’t fucking know why you stayed with him, you don’t know why you loved him, you don’t know anything except the fact that you did– you did stay, you did love him, you did everything you wished you hadn’t. And it still led you to that night, to that rotten smelling taxi, to you crying in a red eye flight, to you landing, lost and hurt.

Because that night might have been the first time he laid his hands on you, but you doubted it would be the last. And it was up to you to do something about it.

————————————

“Y/N? Are you up?”

It’s a rhetorical question more than anything– you’ve been awake all night and Spencer knows. He blinked awake with every twist and turn, and in the morning, when his alarm went off, you were stiff on your side, trying to pretend you’re asleep.

This has nothing to do with him. Last night, things ended in a positive note. After he showered, he came to bed to find you still wearing his FBI hoodie, and the smile on his face was enough to have you smiling too. You fell asleep to the sweet sounds of him reading you The Illustrated Man. Ray Bradbury is a common name in your guys’ conversations and it’s cute how he spends almost fifteen minutes looking for one of his books in the mess that are his shelves. According to him, they used to be alphabetised by author’s last name, much like in your store, but because of the time you’ve had in there, things have gotten a little… messy. You have a habit of reading different things at the same time and Spencer finds that adorable, even if it breaks his system with how you leave books scattered around the house.

“Yeah,” You call back, meeting his eye when he pops his head through the door. His hair is pointing in all directions, and you can smell food coming from the kitchen. “Are you cooking something? Spence, you said you don’t cook, what are you doing?”

“I’m a thirty year old man,” He said, laughing at how you push the duvet away so desperately you trip on it to run to where you assume the fire is. “Careful! Oh my god, Y/N, you’re breaking my heart here, I’m not burning anything!”

It’s not your fault that your mind immediately goes to the worst case scenario. From all the stories you’ve heard, all the ones that ended in disaster were set in his kitchen. “Spence, you could’ve woken me up,” You shake your head when you see that he actually just made toast with butter and jam. “I would’ve made you something to eat.”

“You’re not my maid,” He says, standing behind you with his hands in his pockets and this is when you notice– he’s wearing sweatpants. Previously, when he was sick and you brought him medicine, he was wearing casual clothes too, but you were too busy fussing over him to fully appreciate the beauty that is Casual Spencer. His grey sweatpants and crumpled white t-shirt are enough to have you blushing and averting your eyes. In your store, he is excited. At home, he is relaxed. Those are two different things in the best of ways. “And I wanted to… talk.”

Immediately, you have alarm bells ringing in your head and he notices it. It’s kind of funny, how you learned to read Spencer while he is reading you– you know when things set him off when his eyes widen a little, like a little tell he does every time. Maybe you’re better at this than you think, proud of yourself when he immediately waves his hands in the air, a desperate gaze in his eyes making you snort. “No, no, no,” Words fall from his lips a bit too fast for you to not trip up on them. “No, it’s nothing like that! It’s nothing bad, I just want to know how you’re doing and… check in on you.”

“You want to check in on me?” You shouldn’t sound this enamoured, and you hate yourself for it. For the first time, you two are having an open conversation about what is happening and you want to make sure you’re present and paying attention.

“Of course I do,” His mumbling is barely audible from the living room, but when he yelps ouch and turns around with a plate of toast and coffee, you hear him loud and clear. Words mean a lot for someone like you, someone who lives off of them, but actions might just mean more because of who they are coming from. Because of his shy nature, when Spencer is direct and a bit more abrupt, it means something– it means that he is angry, or happy, or emotional, or dedicated. You like that he is dedicated about this; about you. It’s selfish in nature, but it’s true– him making you breakfast, him fussing over you, him trying… it’s all just Spencer’s way of showing that he is serious about this, and you don’t mind one bit. “Here you go. Eat up.”

Instead, you show him you’re serious too. You smile, and wait until he has grabbed his own food and joined you on the couch, to start talking. “Spencer, thank you,” You whisper, looking down at the little space that keeps you two apart as a reminder: things might be getting better, and they might be on the mend, but there is still a long way to go for things to get great.

Surprisingly enough, though, it’s quite easy to forget about Cat Adams when she’s not harassing you with unwanted gifts or letters, and it feels quite powerful to do so. Just like how easy it was to forget Josh when he couldn’t call you anymore, or touch you anymore, or scream at you anymore. What felt like the weight of the world on your shoulders now is simply the touch of a butterfly, floating away as soon as the moment of overthinking and anxiety is done. Some days, it lasts longer than others, and those are the bad the days. But on the better days, the ones that you are able to busy yourself with your store, your crush, your family; yeah, those are the days that Josh and Cat simply can’t get to you.

Today is a better day.

Hell, you might even dare to say that today is a good day, and more and more, you realise just how rare they are. So for today, you don’t allow the ghost of past and future lives to haunt you. For today, you’ll enjoy the blessings of the present.

“Thank you for… helping me through all of this,” You continue, sipping on your coffee to try and keep your hands busy and away from his. After you got a little taste yesterday, feeling the warmth of his palm enveloping yours, you can’t help but want more. You want more touches, more smiles, more sneaky glances. You just want more Spence, however you can have him. “You didn’t have to help me through it all like this. And you certainly didn’t have to come back in the middle of a case just because of this whole mess. So thank you. This really means a lot. You… You mean a lot to me.”

“Y/N, I didn’t come back because of this situation, I came back for you.”

All air is knocked out of your lungs when he says that. In a very Spencer fashion, he doesn’t say it like a confession, like it’s a secret he couldn’t keep it inside anymore. This is nothing more and nothing less than a fact, like all the many others he has told you in your year or something long friendship. He came back for you, and the Earth is round. He came back for you, and the Russian Orthodox Church excommunicated Tolstoy. He came back for you, and Plank’s constant is a fundamental universal constant that defines the quantum nature of energy and relates the energy of a photon to its frequency.

Simple as that.

“I came back for you,” He says again, nervous finger ripping his toast apart until there is no longer a toast there anymore, just bits and pieces of what it once was. Cleaning your hands from crumbs and butter, you gently extend your arm, wanting to show him support in the best way you know how to. But then you remember: Spencer is a germaphobe. He’s reserved and he prefers to wave rather than shake hands, and you pause, hand hovering over his in unsureness. Just as you’re about to pull away, he moves, a flash of limbs and plates that leaves you not time to react.

Spencer is fast and it actually surprises you to see the clumsy man being so agile. He takes a hold of your hand and the familiarity of it all spreads a blush through your body. Even if he had stopped then and there, giving you just this little taste of affection, you would be happy. The way your cheeks flush to that rosy tone he loves so much and never says anything is enough of a hint to how you’re feeling, and this time around, Spencer wants to push the limits just a little bit, just a little more. And it’s obvious by the way his eyes shine with a mischievous glimmer of intent, grabbing you into him until your bodies crash together.

This is the first time you two hug. It’s the first time your arms go around his shoulder, and it’s the first time his arms hook under yours. Spence hugs you like he needs to hug you, face rubbing on your neck like he’s trying to bury it there and hide from the whole world. Like you can actually protect him, and this time, you actually think you can. Your hands move up and down his back, a soft touch for the man that hated them so much. Sadness sweeps through you when you think about little him, avoiding touches and waving from afar instead. “Spence…” You mumble, pushing away for a second to try and talk to him, but he is quick to hold you in place.

“Stay,” The way his voice breaks off makes you hug him even tighter. “Please. I… I’m happy you’re here.”

“Spence, what’s going on?” Maybe it’s good that you can’t really look eye to eye. Those honey orbs, always so shiny and expectant, render you defenceless every time.

He takes a moment to answer and you know he’s thinking, the machinery in his head whirring to lifer. “When you called me that night, I think my heart stopped. I thought… I thought something had happened to you, and I couldn’t… be there. I couldn’t be here. And it broke my heart, because this is my fault. It’s my fault that you’re scared and that your entire life changed, and I’m just really sorry, Y/N.”

That is a hard pill to swallow. You knew he was feeling guilty; you know more about Spencer than he thinks you do– but what you didn’t know was that he was feeling bad. “Spence, I’m okay. And I’m safe. All because of you. I… I’ve been doing some research, and I know this is not usually something that would take priority for the FBI, considering that besides a note, Cat hasn’t really done anything to me, and if it wasn’t because of you, I’d probably be going through all of this alone.”

“You are a priority to me.”

“I know that now,” You whisper, shaky fingers raking through his hair in a desperate attempt to calm him down, praying, begging, hoping he won’t ask you to stop. “At… first I did blame you a little. Like, not blame you, but… it was like I couldn’t separate you and what was going on and I was angry and upset and I’m sorry too. I pushed you away when I think we both needed some support from each other, and I didn’t mean to make you worry even more, you have to believe me, I swear!”

You don’t know when the roles reverse, but it’s like a war of tug, sometimes you pull and sometimes you get pulled, and right now, Spencer is pulling you into his arms with the strength of a man who needs you. “No, Y/N, no no, you don’t have to apologise! This… God, this is a mess.”

Chuckling with him feels better than chuckling at him, and you take the moment to just enjoy the feeling of being in his arms with no rhyme or reason. “It really is, but it’s our mess and I think that, all in all, we’re dealing with it quite well, Spence.”

Everything about that moment is soft. The light is trying to come through the curtains and you smile to yourself. Spencer has always been stubborn about sunlight and he prefers the apartment on the darker side, but you can’t help but let your fingers move from his shoulder, dragging the tips all the way from his shoulder, down his arm, and extending to the end of the curtain, hooking them on the corner and raising a little bit. “It’s a nice day out…” You mumble more to yourself than him.

“Do you want to go out?” Spence asks, raising his head away from your shoulder to look at you, but you just shake your head. “What do you want to do? I have the day off today, so we can do anything you want, I swear.”

“Hmm, can we go to the store?” Sure, it’s not the most exciting thing ever, but you miss it. You miss your books that you keep in a special corner behind the counter, and you miss the deliveries that are probably pilling up with your neighbour. The question is more amusing than anything, though, because you know the answer already.

And him shaking his head only confirms your theory. Even though you know, you’re still frustrated. “Spence, please…”

“Y/N, your house is above your store,” He does seem to be upset with his own answer, and though that does not make you feel any better, you at least know he understands where you’re coming from. “We can’t risk it right now. Cat just sent a note straight to your address, and we don’t know if she knows you own the store or not, or if she has a partner working with her from the outside, or–”

“I know, I just– I don’t want to lose my store. It’s all I have.” The way your fingers fidget, playing with each other in a familiar nervous manner that you’ve surely picked up from him, has Spencer reaching out to hold your hands with both of his. It leaves you a bit breathless to notice just how big his hands are, covering yours completely.

“You will not lose your store. I will not let that happen. But I think this could be a good chance to maybe think about a hiring a manager or a helper for a while. Temporarily! Just until we can make sure that you are safe.” Without noticing, his thumb slides over the top of your hand, a calming back and forth that eases the frown on your forehead when you think about a stranger at your store. “Just someone to be with you when the store is empty, Y/N.”

Logic is on his side, as usual, and although you would never consider this under normal circumstances, you are reaching a point in which there are no other options. “A couple of days ago I sold out of stock for the first time since opening the store. I’m finally turning profit after being barely able to keep the place afloat. I love my daily routine there. I can’t let her take this away from me, Spence.”

“And she won’t. But don’t you think the help will be good? With new stock coming in and the reading events you wanted to prepare, having a trusty helper will save you some stress. And we’ll have Penelope run a check on every candidate!”

“I don’t know… is it fair for me to get someone involved in… this?” He instantly knows what you mean. “Can I think about it?”

“Of course you can. I understanding this was not in your plans, and I know you love your job and your routine and we’ll make a new one for you! We’ll create a schedule and we’ll alternate days so that you don’t have a predictable location and-and we can make it a fun thing, you know? Creating the week’s schedule, like the Sunday crossword! We could do the schedule on Saturdays and the crossword on Sundays– what do you think?”

You think this is a plan. A future plan. A future plan that is reliant on the fact of you still living in his apartment and part of you hates it, because part of you, a big part of you, wants to go home and stop feeling like such a burden to him. But then there is the smaller part of you; the part that likes waking up and hearing his hoarse voice first thing in the morning; the part of you that feels spoiled with the breakfasts in the couch; the part of you that hasn’t really been loved in a while and really missed it. That is the same part of you that swoons every time he smiles at you, and you nod, and nod, and nod. “That sounds perfect,” You whisper, looking around the living room and seeing this future he talks so much about. It truly does sound… “Perfect.”

That afternoon, he helps you write a job ad for a store manager. It’s fun doing this with him because you get a chance to pick that brain that always amazes you so much. “No, no, you should give them a feel for the store,” The way his breathing hits the nape of your neck with every word he says while reading over your shoulder makes you shiver. “Oh? Are you cold?” What you miss is the the little smile he gives you from behind, turning to quickly grab the blanket you left on the armchair to cover your shoulders.

“But I don’t want them too comfortable, it’s still my store,” You grumble, leaning back without even thinking about it. You are both by the kitchen counter, and you’re sitting on a stool with Spencer right behind you, so when you fall back, arms curling around your body and wrapping the blanket tighter around you, you fall right onto his chest. The shattered pieces of that wall you two had between you two lay on your feet, no completely gone but simply lowered; the jitters of having him so close, the anxiety of maybe having him pull away, the strong beat of his heart right on your back. It’s all there, and it all amplifies when his arms wrap around your waist. It’s too careful, the way he holds you; too light and gentle and oh so slow. You just want him to hug you like he did before, to show you more of that hidden strength he kept suppressed all the time. Spencer is not dominant by any mean, but he isn’t someone to be walked all over, either, and the more that Cat pushes you, the more you are starting to see him push back.

And you love when Spencer push back.

“Okay, focus!” His voice snaps you back to reality, so close to your ear and his chin digging on your shoulder. It’s cute how he likes to fit his face in the little nook of your neck, between your cheeks and shoulders, and it’s… oddly intimate. The kind of intimate that makes you tense up a little just at the thought. “Hey… I know this is a big step for the store, but I’m proud of you. It’ll be great to be able to share the responsibility of the place with someone else. A team is not so bad, Y/N.”

If he is any indication of what is like to have a partner, if having Spencer by your side and ready to back you up is a little taster of what being on a team is like, then he might just be right. “I know, I just… this is my baby, you know? I moved to Washington with a backpack and an email from the agent to lease the place and there is a lot of effort and emotional energy and money that went into this!”

“You moved to Washington with just a backpack?”

Curiosity is a natural response for a man like Spencer. He is curious about virtually everything and anything, and it makes your heart beat faster, every time, when he asks something to you. It feels like a sign of trust, that he is willing to actually learn from you, to listen to you, and to store all you say into his hungry brain. This time, however, when your heart speeds up, it doesn’t have those same palpitation of adoration, those same butterflies fluttering in your stomach. Instead, it feels like there’s a rock, heavy and cold and hard, being thrown around your gut, all sharp edges and precise hits. “I, uh,” Immediately, you want to move– you want to push your hair back or scratch the mysterious itch on your nape or rub the tension off of your forehead– but then you remember that he is an avid reader. And that, apparently, you are his new favourite book.

You try to play it cool, hand coming back down to the laptop’s keyboard to type out some basic information on the store and the schedule. “Yeah, it was a weird time,” And that’s all you say on the subject, even if the way he squints, those molten brown eyes running over every inch of you that you’re sure he has committed to memory, tell you that he has gotten much more information than you were willing to give. “Okay, I think it’s ready?”

He knows what you’re doing, but he doesn’t care. Uncomfortableness is written all over you, from how your shoulders hunch forward to how you stick your hands between your thighs to stop them from fidgeting. Spencer is very careful of your self-awareness. He has seen you shut down before and he knows the telling signs– you pull away, withdraw back and back and back, until you disappear in the background of your anxieties. The last thing he wants is for you to not speak to him again, arms squeezing you a bit close in fear that you might just get up and leave him behind again. Having you sit on the armchair, so close yet so far while he slept in the couch next to you, had been hard. Incredibly hard. And Spencer isn’t sure he can handle that again.

So he lets it go.

He hums, and nods, and lets you think you’ve fooled him. He lets you think that you’ve successfully whisked his attention away from the topic he wants to chat through and dissect so badly. “Looks great,” It’s cute how fast he reads the ad, and before you can overthink about it, he clicks ‘send.’ “Spence! Oh my god!”

“You weren’t going to do it,” He laughs, shaking his head and turning the stool so that you two are face to face. “I’m sorry you have to do this.”

“It’s okay,” You whisper, breath hitching on your throat with just how intensely he’s looking at you. There is tension between you two, strong and growing, and it’s not the first time you’ve noticed it.

Sometimes, you think that this weird connection dates back to the first few months you knew each other. At first, it was about stupid things like what authors were truly considered cult or what were the best tropes. Banter, with Spencer, was always fun, like a little debate filled with smiles and giggles and… privacy, almost. Intimacy. It’s like every time you two talk a bubble forms around you, and no one can steal his attention. He is present, at all times, and it makes you feel like you matter; it makes you want to be present, too, happily listening to his rants and lecture with attentive eyes. Sometimes, you even pulled out a little notebook after he was gone to work, noting down the facts you’ve managed to remember, and whenever you were a bit bored, you would pull your notes out and read them over, smiling at the memories of him. The memories of him that are now locked in the drawer behind your counter. “Fuck.”

“What?”

“I need to go get some stuff from the store,” You mumble, looking up at him with begging eyes. “I know you said to keep out, but please, Spence, I need more clothes and I need my things.”

It doesn’t take much convincing to have him ready to go, and you are almost giddy at the sight of Spencer in jeans. Everyone can, or at least they should, see beyond the slacks and the sweater vests. Underneath it all, you know there is a man who needs some tender loving– you know there are scars, maybe visible, maybe not, but it doesn’t matter. Without his tie and his button ups, Spencer is just like any other guy, and the walls come down. Right now, he is Spence, your favourite customer and the guy that makes your heart beat faster, and you kind of love that you get to leave Agent Reid behind for a day or two.

“Let’s go, Spence!” You call, excited to get out of the house for a bit. The fresh air coming in from the open window teases you enough to have you stomping, shouting for him again. “Spencer!”

“I’m coming, I’m coming,” His laughter echoes in the apartment and you smiled when you see him grabbing his phone and keys.

This is too good to be true. It has now been eight days since the initial package you received in Spencer’s name, and as much as you know his intentions are good, you do wonder if maybe he is going a little overboard out of guilt. “I’m so excited to go to the store with you again!” You shriek, going down the stairs with him in tow. You’re not really looking where you’re going, constantly turning back to look at him just to catch a glimpse of that adorable smile he tries to hold back.

“Y/N, watch out–“ In all fairness, Spencer tries to reach for you and hold you back, but the moment your feet touch the ground floor, your body hits another with such impulse that you sway back into Spencer’s hands. “Are you okay?”

“Yes, yeah, I’m–“ Turning to the person, a young woman with an expression of as much shock as yours, you immediately start to apologise. “I’m so sorry! Oh god, I’m so sorry, I–“ “Don’t worry at all,” She smiles and picks up her boxes again. “I couldn’t see because of the boxes, it’s my fault.”

“Are you moving in?”

You know that tone of voice. It’s stored in your brain as the tone of voice you never wanted to hear again, after hours of it back at the BAU office. “Hey, come on,” You whisper, allowing him lightly.

“Yes! I’m moving into apartment 13. It’s nice to meet you, I’m Abigail. Do you guys live in the building?”

“Oh, I uh, I’m just–“

The way he slips his hand in yours, fingers folding with yours. “Yeah, we live upstairs,” He says vaguely, slowly continuing to walk own the hall. “We’re a bit late, but it was great meeting you Abigail. See you around.”

You barely have time to wave before he has you out in the street, phone out and ready to go. “Sorry, I just need to call Garcia for a second. Go ahead, yeah? I’m right behind you, I promise.”

Under his watchful eyes, you take the lead in making your way to the bookstore. The sound of his shoes crackling in the sidewalk behind you is comforting. “I’m going in, just call out for me when you’re ready, okay?”

As soon as you get inside, it’s like you’re home. The books are everywhere, and you feel their warm embrace as they whisper stories in your ears. You’re like a hurricane in there, moving around with such trained expertise that no one could ever contest that you belong there, in your sacred place. Your backpack is by the counter, slowly filling up with books you want to take with you, and you enjoy the fact that Spencer is busy to check your emails for online orders and stock. So far, no big losses have taken place and you’ve only been closed for a couple of days, but you are realistic about the future of this place and you know this cannot continue. The more you see the store suffering from all of this, the more you agree that having someone mind the place while you’re out might be a good idea. Hesitancy still swirls in your heart, but you’ll do anything to avoid the heartbreak of losing your bookshop.

You don’t turn around when the bell rings. “Spence, I might need a couple more minutes–“

“We got to go. I’m sorry Y/N, we need to go, grab whatever you can.”

A sharp exhale escapes you like a knife just wedged itself in your lungs. “What’s going on?”

“Officer Kaper just called for backup,” Everything is fast again, moving forward, forward, forward, and Spencer knows how overwhelming this must be, specially after the slow and soft morning you two had, but he is working on a one track mind. He needs to get you out of there.

“Backup?” Cars honk while you two cross the street in a hurry. “Spencer, stop running, stop! What’s going on?!”

He doesn’t answer you until you’re both in his apartment, door locked and phone in hand, nervously squeezing it while he paced around.

“Spence,” You call again, careful with how you approach him when he is trying so hard to keep control of himself. “Spence, I– What’s going on?”

His eyes tell you everything. In those whiskey coloured pupils, you see the hurt and the pain, and you see the hesitation. One hand moves to push his hair back, frustration lacing every movement he makes, from walking to the couch and letting his body plop down to how his head hangs low.

“He’s on his way to the hospital. His house got broken into and… we have no confirmation, but we think it’s–“

“Fucking Cat.”

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tenchikotheartist · 8 months

Text

Frick it, we ball

KISMET HEADCANNONS for some future fan stuff I wanna make... Goes with this post kinda

Under a cut because it's LONG (the fixation has been REAL)

Gen

They band was formed shortly after the events of Trolls 1. It's the only way they make sense in my mind's timeline.

Branch was trying to get more involved with Troll village without relying on Poppy to connect him with people. He formed his own group of friends, and they became Kismet after realizing how much they enjoyed harmonizing/performing together.

These guys give me frat boy energy for some reason. They just collectively become more chaotic when they're around each other. Yes, even Branch. He and Hype play hot potato with the braincell because otherwise, nothing would get done in this group.

As they got to know one another, teasing one another became their primary love language. Lots of jabs and quips will fly among them when they're together, but they each know it's all in good fun.

Branch

Branch kept his involvement in the band a secret because, well...y'know. He has complicated history with being in a boyband, so he wanted to explore his feelings about Kismet without being bombarded with input from people outside the group.

He's fond of his friends and genuinely enjoys being a part of the band though! He just wants to be sure he's a part of this boy band because he's happy being with them and not because he's trying to recapture something he'd lost 20 years ago.

At first, the others were (understandably) hurt by Branch's desire to keep his place in the band a secret, but after he explained his reasons, they were willing to support him.

They were absolutely thrilled when he finally becomes open about the band though!

During the secrecy period, when he performs in Pop Village, he hides his identity behind a disguise that somehow works (Branch, every time it works: "wtf????"), and he goes by a stage name.

Hype

Officially the group leader, but he's more of a mediator than anything. He relies on the rest of the group to give their input for any big band decisions, but he coordinates band meetings, schedules gigs, and works out compromises if there's any group conflicts.

He and Branch had been childhood friends before The Incident(s) estranged them. Back in the Troll Tree, they'd been neighbors whose parents (Branch's grandma; Hype's mom) set up on frequent playdates, so they'd been really close.

They reconnected after the events of movie 1, Hype introduced Branch to Trickee and later Boom. Trickee brought in Ablaze and the rest was history.

Hype is a social butterly but he's otherwise one of the more calm personalities in the group. He feeds off of other people's energy and is a bit of a people-pleaser. Luckily, he's pretty good at finding the right crowd to run with, otherwise he'd probably land in so much trouble.

Boom

Hype's cousin, and a big party person! Before the band took off, he DJ'd at a party venue in Pop Village. That same place was also where Kismet got their first gig!

He loves loud music and flashy parties where he can shine on the dance floor and make memories people he may only know for a night.

Peak ADHD Energy™. He's a chatterbox. He has no volume control. He tunnel visions so hard, he becomes that B99 headphones meme. The man has cool guy syndrome, no doubt about it!

For the creation of the Band earliest albums, Boom took charge as the producer. He loves messing with music, mixing and remixing sounds on his free time and experimenting with the genre.

Trickee

A thrill-seeking menace to society. He's adventurous and loves taking huge risks for the adrenaline rush. He's the type of guy who would go down a waterfall in a barrel or ski down a dangerous mountain just to see if he survives it.

Everyone in the band is in agreement about protecting Trickee from his own shenanigans. They are 70% of his self-preservation senses.

He also loves a party scene and can often be found with Boom leading the charge towards any good time.

You know that sense of dread before performing in front of a crowd? The way your belly flips and your heart races and you're sure you're shaking hard enough for everyone to see? Trickee lives for that shit when he's in the band. The jitters can get to him, for sure, but afterwards, the man is LIVING from coming out alive on the other side, and he's sharing that thrill with everyone else in the band!

Ablaze

A Rock Troll who has lived among the Pop Trolls since he was a teenager. He stumbled across them while looking for a place to belong, and despite what he was raised to believe about Pop Trolls, he came to love their warmth and friendliness. So he moved in and let everyone assume he was just an odd-looking Pop Troll.

He an Trickee are housemates (podmates?)--not for romantic reasons but because they're longtime friends. When Trickee moved out of his family's home, Ablaze invited him over, and they liked the living arrangement enough to keep it permanent.

At first, Ablaze isn't open about his identity as a Rock Troll, but as he grew closer with the other members of Kismet, he came out to them. By the events of Trolls 2, he's open about being a Rock Troll.

Ablaze's personality sits somewhere in the realm of both chaotic and laid back. On the outside, he's usually pretty chill, but if Boom or Trickee have trouble afoot, Ablaze is usually there egging them on in the background, much to Branch's dismay.

He becomes extremely energetic when he's performing. The more exciting the song, the more vibrant he becomes! The energy is one of the reasons he loves pop music so much, but he can also get hyped from performing rock music. He gets kinda intense though lmao.

The first time the rest of Kismet sees him jamming to rock, they're like "OH. He's definitely a rock troll O_O" They support their rock-n-roll brethren 🤟😔

He has a special interest in fire, particularly fireworks. Back in Pop Village, he even made a business of it, making small rockets, sparklers, and other celebratory items for all your Pop party needs.

Anyway that's all the headcannon stuff I'll share for now. Hope y'all liked reading xD I'm really hoping my attention span will stick around long enough for me to share more in the future, because this fixation has been A Time™/pos

#dreamworks trolls #trolls #trolls branch #trolls hype #trolls trickee #trolls boom #trolls ablaze #kismet #trolls kismet #kismet cc #kismet cd #headcannons #tenchiko has spoken #no art #apologies for any misspellings or the like #I really wanted to info dump before I make more stuff to throw in the queue

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xoxo-ren-xoxo · 3 months

Text

A Popstar Grian AU - Ari AU (Part One)

Or, @angeart and I put Grian through a lot of pain for no good reason.

Hello! Like two people showed interest in my post about Ari AU, thus here we are. This is not really a 'fic', but it isn't a short summary either. Let your mind go wild. Let your imagination be free. Read my words, boy.

This is Part One. Part Two is here. Part Three is here. Part Four is here. Part Five is here. The tag for this is #ari au.

But before we start, some introductory things you should know.

This is scarian. Don't read if you do not like scarian.

Grian uses he/she pronouns and is transfem genderqueer, I tend to default to she as it helps differentiate her from other characters a lot, but I mix it up.

I somewhat based this AU on attitudes towards celebrities / stars from the 2000s - present day, so this can be read as a period piece in some ways... This concept started with the song 'The Fear' by Lily Allen. I recommend giving it a listen.

This is the "real world", so no hybrids, no respawn, no "code", etc.

CONTENT WARNINGS for this Part: stalking, physical assault, attempted sexual assault, drugging, mentions of vomit, hospitals, me autismposting about music genres.

You can always stop reading! The AU starts out pretty tame and gradually gets, well, worse. But I promise it has a hopeful ending! Eventually!

(also please ask me questions, send ideas, reblog, comment, etc. because I love this AU a lot) (and thank you to Ange for enabling me and adding amazing scenes to this au)

Album One: ‘Sunshine Sedative’

Grian, better known by her stage name ‘Ari’, is a popular singer-songwriter embarking on a world tour to promote her latest album, Sunshine Sedative. The album is indie pop-y and bright, exploring themes of romance, self-empowerment, and subtle references to gender and sexuality. Grian’s style on-stage is hyper-feminine, flashy, and fashionable. He’s known to be a bit prickly, demanding, and stubborn off-stage, slow to warm up to the people around him.

The tour bus carries both Grian and her key crew. Pearl (marketing, PR and organisational work), Impulse (costumes and tech), and Mumbo (tech assistant and main contact for Grian’s manager). Though Grian likes to self-manage, preferring to do her own make-up and plan the set-lists for her own shows.

Recently, Grian has been running into some issues with stalker fans and online haters, receiving some threatening messages on social media. Mumbo tries not to let him doomscroll on his phone too much, even going so far as to confiscate the phone while on tour. This is Grian’s biggest tour- no one was prepared for her to become a star or “indie darling” type- and the fans are… a bit crazy.

After the anonymous threats, Grian agrees to get a bodyguard. This is where Scar comes in. At first, Scar is a little terrified. The company he works for advised him not to annoy or upset Grian, and to always call her Miss Ari. Never disagree with her or do anything he isn’t contracted to do.

Scar throws all of this out of the window pretty fast. Yes, Grian is especially difficult when they first meet, but Scar can tell it’s because Grian is stressed. About the tour, about the fame, about the threats.

A show results in Grian getting a sore throat, and Scar offers her some tea with honey, rambling on about how his mother used to make it for him when he was sick. Grian begrudgingly takes the tea, and tells Scar to just call her Grian from then on. She’s not a fan of the blurring of her private and public life.

Eventually, Grian gets bored enough to rant to Scar about how Mumbo won’t let him use his phone anymore, and Scar offers to sneak it back to him. They have a laugh scrolling through celebrity news and playing silly games together. Then they get found out and both get a stern talking to from Mumbo and Impulse. (Pearl laughs at them in the background).

As Grian’s tour starts selling out, more tour dates are added, extending their time on the road. Scar continues to sneak Grian’s phone to her, pushing her to have fun rather than scroll through hate messages. It seems like a peak moment for Grian, delighted by the idea that she has so many fans, and beginning to develop a bit of a crush on Scar. Grian even starts acting a little nicer.

Tabloids and Stalkers

The fame comes with more caveats than Grian anticipated. One day, while Scar and Grian are reading some dumb article on Grian’s phone, she receives a random message from a burner account. It’s a picture of Grian, through a hotel window, half dressed. Grian recognises the hotel, one they stayed in a few nights ago just to get away from the tour bus.

Someone knew she would be there. Knew what room she would be staying in. There is a vaguely ominous / threatening message attached. It makes Grian never want to step foot outside again. It makes her feel sick. Suddenly she can’t focus on anything around her.

He has a panic attack.

Later, as Grian is pacing the floor of the bus, he’s told not to make an announcement about the stalker. She decides herself not to go to the police, and, after some hesitation, not to cancel the tour. They can’t disappoint all those people.

Over the next few shows, Grian gets closer to Scar. Both because they get along so well, and because Scar is there to protect her. He's clumsy and funny and once he starts talking about something he likes, it’s hard to get him to stop. Grian finds him incredibly endearing and, more importantly, incredibly safe.

But things are bad. Grian can’t even go to a public bathroom without Scar checking to make sure no one is waiting for her. He feels constantly watched, constantly on-edge, constantly afraid. The paparazzi don’t exactly make it easier.

Tabloids love Ari. She’s a superstar, a real diamond in the rough who came from nothing. They’re obsessed. Anything she does in public can make a tabloid front page. As the tour goes on and her songs rocket up the charts, it only gets worse. The flashes of the cameras have started to scare him.

Scar is an angel, dealing with the paparazzi professionally and confidently. He stands in front of Grian and chases the cameras off. But it feels like they can’t go anywhere. They can’t do anything. Even when they stop at another hotel, Grian can’t tell if the people outside are stalkers or journalists.

The pictures on the tabloid front pages are no longer stunning shots from the shows, but rather blurry snaps of Grian trying to escape the cameras. Images of Grian, wide-eyed and scared by the surprise of a camera flash, before she could put on a fake smile. Grian, through a window in the parked tour bus, with teary eyes. Even private moments are no longer private.

Media outlets start to pay for more intimate photos- anything the journalists might get fired for trying to snap themselves. It gives the stalkers (there are certainly multiple, now) more incentive. Grian keeps the curtains closed in every building he visits, and draws the tiny blinds on the bus.

Relationship Goals?

In the meantime, Grian’s crush on Scar is getting more obvious, but she’s afraid to say anything. Dragging Scar into this, with all the harassment he would face if they revealed they were together, isn’t what Grian wants. She flinches away when Scar offers a comforting touch, not wanting to risk a photograph.

Scar is the one, then, who takes the initiative. He sits with Grian on her little fold-out bed at the back of the tour bus, all curtains drawn and the door closed. He holds her close and tells her firmly that no one is going to see them here. They're traveling at 50mph on a motorway and no one can even see through the windows anyway. And that's maybe just enough for Grian to let himself lean into Scars touch. Admit his feelings.

There’s a sense of shame he's carrying with them. He shouldn't have fallen for his bodyguard- someone who has to stay with him, contractually. She tries to say as much, going on and on about all the terrible risks Scar is bringing to himself by dating her, but Scar cuts Grian off by kissing her, anyway.

As soon as the media gets a hint of the relationship, things seem to go downhill. Diehard fans don’t react kindly to Grian’s choice of man, especially the ones who want to have her for themselves. Someone throws something at Scar when Grian is leaving a show, hitting him on the head. It isn’t a bad injury, but it bleeds a lot, and Grian only feels worse about it when Scar insists he’s okay.

Actual Bodily Harm

The fans seem to get more… intense. Stalking and threats of harm increase, while the fans' behaviour at shows seems to get worse. As the tour is nearing its final few weeks, people start to throw things onto the stage. The first time it happens, Grian cuts the set short without anyone really noticing. The next time, someone throws a glass bottle, and she walks off.

He tries not to make a big fuss about it, simply leaving without playing a single song. She feels awful, of course, for leaving the normal fans without a show. Perhaps they should refund the tickets, or something. She doesn’t even notice the glass shards in her foot until Scar points them out, horrified.

Pearl convinces Grian to take a picture of the injury and make a PSA post on social media. Even when the adrenaline wears off, Grian’s resulting breakdown seems subdued.

No one throws anything at the next few shows, except for a trans pride flag. Grian wears it as a cape, and feels amazing, for once, hearing the cheers and screams of joy at the gesture. She loves that she can be a symbol of hope and love for so many people. It’s even enough of a boost to get him acting more like himself again in private: mischievous, bright, and creative.

It is near the end of the tour when things go completely, utterly wrong again. Grian and the crew all go to a bar after a show, to celebrate the last week of the tour. Three more shows, and then it’s over. Grian is in somewhat normal clothes, compared to his usual getup, but still puts on his persona just in case they've been followed by the paparazzi (again).

Everyone's having a nice time, drinking a little and hanging out. As always, it is nice to be getting away from the bus. Pearl and Impulse buy far too many shots, much to Mumbo’s dismay. Grian laughs and jokes and raises her voice, not caring if she’s croaky the next day.

He doesn't notice someone watching him from across the room. Doesn't notice them slip something into her drink when she goes up to the bar. She pays for another pint, and they strike up conversation. Giddily, she chats with them, rambling about how good life has suddenly become. As he sips his drink, he doesn’t register how focused on him they are. How their dark eyes don’t leave him once.

It’s fine, until she stumbles, on the way back to the booth everyone's sitting at, and the stranger catches her before she can fall with strong arms. They're talking, but Grian isn't really listening. She’s nodding along and mumbling about needing to get back to the booth. Back to her friends.

It feels wrong. They keep hold of her shoulders. They're saying something about getting her home safe. Something about how they've been waiting for this…

He realises what’s happening far too late. Panic clutches her chest for a split second. Long enough for him to call out for Scar. She's already being manhandled out of the door before Scar comes to her rescue. Thankfully, by a miracle, close enough to hear the cry for help.

Grian knows something happens to the stranger, because they're on the floor and bleeding. Voices buzz, muffled, around Grian. There are more hands on her. She doesn’t like it. Her head hurts. Scar’s hand is bloody as he hugs her. Grian passes out.

Hospital Visit One

The crew, quite obviously, take Grian to the hospital. He was drugged, and it’s clear what the perpetrator wanted to do. It shakes them all, left wondering whether the creep knew who Grian was, or just randomly targeted a drunk stranger on a night out. Either way, none of them want to go near a bar any time soon.

On the way to the hospital, the press capture pictures of Grian unconscious, or half-awake with no awareness, and by the time the morning rolls in, the papers are already speculating about addiction and ‘gone wild’ narratives. When Grian wakes up, still slightly delirious, he's told, hesitantly, by Pearl, that they have to release a statement soon in order to clear his name and control the narrative. Grian can’t find it in herself to cry about what happened.

Before any statements are made, the police come to talk to Grian. They arrested the perpetrator and searched their house, not that it’ll result in much. They show Grian pictures of rope, duct tape, knives, and a poster from her tour.

Feeling numb, Grian takes a moment to go throw up in a bin, then tells her team she wants to make a statement now. She wants it recorded, as she is, now. Pearl and Mumbo try to argue that it really isn't a good idea, without a script and looking… bad, but Scar and Impulse back Grian’s choice. Reluctantly, Mumbo grabs one of the nice cameras from his car- the bus was far too conspicuous to park at a hospital- and they record.

They don't know what Grian’s going to say, but, put basically, the video explains everything that has happened- from the stalkers to the glass to the drugging- and apologises to the fans who did nothing wrong. And even the fans who just wanted to know some gossip, because they weren't really to blame. Then she announces that she's cancelling the rest of the tour.

Mumbo shuts off the camera. Everyone apart from Scar is a bit shocked. Incredulous. Shouldn’t they talk about this? Is it worth it to cancel at the last hurdle? Scar cuts off the protests, pointing out how insensitive it is to try and make Grian perform after everything. Grian stays quiet as Scar somewhat lectures the others. It’s a rambling mess of an argument, but it works. They apologise.

The statement video is posted online, and Grian is left to rest. Scar remains at his side.

Once Grian is checked over and discharged, they get back to the bus fast. She retreats to her closed-off space at the back of the bus, telling everyone to get on with their jobs. Once she's alone, she replays the images the police showed her in her mind. He thinks about what could have happened. He thinks about the stranger's hands on his shoulders and at his hips. She remembers that she started out just wanting to make music, and she cries.

#ben chats shit on the internet #ari au #grian #scarian #gtws #gtwscar #goodtimeswithscar #hermitcraft #hermitblr #hermitshipping #im not gonna tag all the warnings just please be smart about this.#long post #im insane. please reblog </3

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makeitmingi · 1 year

Text

Cause Baby You're My Muse [Chapter 23]

Genre: Romance, Idol!AU, Music, Slight angst

Pairing: Mingi x Reader (y/n)

Characters: Producer!Reader, IdolLyricist!Mingi, IdolProducer!Hongjoong, Idol!Seonghwa, Idol!Yunho, Idol!Wooyoung, Idol!San, Idol!Yeosang, Idol!Jongho, cameo(s) by other celebrities

Summary: You always preferred producing underground, having an unknown face and governed by your own rules. But when you start freelancing for idol groups, you say goodbye to your lone wolf lifestyle as you learn to work with idol producers and lyricists.

Word count: 3.2K

"Hmmm..."

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Your staring is distracting me."

"You're just beautiful."

"Come on, Mings. Be serious." You lifted your leg to lightly kick his thigh. Mingi had told Hongjoong he was going to your place to "work" with you on the new song since he had some lyrics for it. But of course, Mingi was getting distracted by you and that led you to be distracted by him as well.

"Oww, stop with your violence, woman." Mingi swatted your ankle away from him. Now, he was just leaning his head against his hand as he stared at you lovingly.

"Stop staring at me. You're making me feel self conscious." You met his eyes, using two fingers to push his forehead.

"There's nothing for you to feel conscious about." Mingi said in a dreamy tone.

"Now you're speaking nonsense." You scoffed, turning back to your work on the computer. But suddenly, you felt arms around you and you yelped as you were lifted up. Mingi set you down on his lap.

"There. That's better." He nodded proudly in approval.

"How are you going to work like this, might I ask?" You turned to him. He rested his chin on your shoulder, arms reaching around you to pick up his pen.

"See? It's not that hard, baby." He chuckled. You rolled your eyes but didn't protest, continuing to mix the piece of instrumental music that Maddox had sent to you. Even if you acted like you didn't, you liked being close to Mingi.

"Wow, I can just feel all the lyrics coming to me already." Mingi gasped in exaggeration.

"I'm done with you, Song Mingi." You squirmed but Mingi dropped his pen to wrap his arms around your waist more firmly.

"Okay! Okay! I'm sorry, we'll do work. Just don't go, okay?" Mingi coaxed. You gave him a warning look but settled back into his lap comfortably before typing away on your computer.

"Mings..." Your fingers stopped moving on the keyboard, hovering over the keys.

"Yes, my baby?" Mingi hummed.

"Does anyone know? Have you told anyone?" You asked. Mingi placed his pen down, this time gently holding your waist to turn you around so you faced him.

"Yunho knows. But I didn't tell him, he deduced it himself. That boy... He's known me for too long and knows too much about me. He knew about my feelings for you before I did. I trust him not to tell anyone." Mingi said, his fingers interlocking behind your back to support you so you wouldn't fall..

"Okay. If you trust him, I do too. And I know Yunho is a good friend." You smiled.

"He is. I trust him with my life." He pressed his forehead against yours. You reached up to caress his cheek, making Mingi inch forward just a little to kiss you.

"We won't tell anyone else until we're ready. There's no rush." Holding your hand, he kissed your knuckles.

I'm just so happy to finally be able to call you mine. That's all that matter to me right now." Mingi whispered as he hugged you. You chuckled as your cheek pressed against his shoulder.

"I'm yours too, you know that right?" He asked.

"Yes, along with many other Atinys out there." You pulled away, a mischievous smile on your face as you teased him.

"You know that's different." It was now his turn to roll his eyes. After you gave him another quick peck, you turned back around to face the desk to finish your work. With the songs for the next Ateez album confirmed, there were deadlines to meet.

"Once the lyrics are in and the instrumental is approved, we can start the actual song recording. I'm excited, I've never actually been there for the live recording part before." You said.

"Really? But you've been a part of so many hit songs." Mingi blinked in surprise at your words.

"Yeah but that's companies buying beats, melodies, instrumentals off me. This time, I'm really a part of the whole process." You shrugged.

"It'll be a new experience for sure." He patted your head.

"I know you guys are just as chaotic and loud in the studio. Eden already warned me." You scoffed. But secretly, you were used to it and wouldn't have it any other way.

"Wait, let me find some food." You stood up and walked out of the studio to the kitchen.

You hoped chewing on some food would keep you more focused. But let's be honest, the reason why you couldn't focus was because of the 1.84m male that is glued to you at the hip. That very male shuffled out a few minutes after you, leaning over your taller frame as you cut some fruit.

"You're always towering over me." You scoffed.

"But I like it this way." He placed his chin on the top of your head for emphasis. His entire body wrapped around yours, embracing you in his warmth and scent.

"What snacks do you want? I got some in the cupboard there. Or you can have some of Haneul's snacks." You said.

"No, I don't want to face her wrath." Mingi chuckled.

"She's 5..." You tilted your head back to look up at him. Mingi shrugged but went to the cupboard to get a box of crackers. You placed the sliced fruit into the bowl to make some sort of fruit mix.

"Can I have a seaweed popcorn too, please?" You asked, taking out a tray and small bowls.

"Sure, baby. Let me do it." Mingi opened the small bag for you, emptying the snacks into their own bowls.

"Let's go." Mingi held the tray in one hand and the other held your hand to go back to the studio. Back you were on Mingi's lap as you worked. Mingi had a soft smile as he watched you focus on your work. The slight frown on your face showed how serious you were.

"Something's not right." You went to your shelf to take your metronome. Mingi respectfully remained quiet as you wore your headphones, exposing one ear to hear the metronome.

You tapped your finger lightly over the mouse, closing your eyes to visualise the instrumental at the different layers.

"A HA!" You yelled, making Mingi yelp.

"You could have given me a heart attack!" Mingi placed a hand over his racing heart.

"Your heart is healthy and fine." You tapped his chest before quickly going the point where you found the error in case you lost it. You pulled up the layer to make the edit.

"Solved it?" He asked.

"I hope so." You put your headphones back on and played the track from the start. As the song played to the end, you had a satisfied smile on your face. Now, you could schedule the recording with all the Ateez members. You opened the chat page and sent out the recording dates.

'Oh, there will be extra recording sessions too. Hongjoong and Jongho for adlibs, Seonghwa and Yunho for back up harmonisation. - Prod. Indigo'

'How about a week from now? - Wooyoung'

'Sounds good. We'll dedicate half a day to the recording. Do the solo recordings then the group parts. - Joong'

'Seonghwa hyung is gaming beside me. He just said he's good three days after the group recording. I'm good on that day as well if you can make it? - Yuyu'

'That's good with me. - Prod. Indigo'

'Seonghwa hyung! Stop playing your game and reply Indigo yourself! - San'

'Anyway, Indi. Jongho is recording now. When he is done, I'll get his schedule and get back to you for the adlib recording dates. - Joong'

"Looks like we're going to be busier once we start the actual recording sessions." You sighed as you booked the recording studio and blocked out the dates in your calendar. Mingi hummed in agreement, glancing at all the coloured blocks on your calendar.

"That means we're not going to be able to have many chances to hang out." You looked at him.

"Don't worry about that, baby. Hmm? We'll still see each other. And I've said before, you shouldn't have to stress about us." Mingi brushed your hair back.

"As long as you're taking care of yourself, I'm content. That's all I want." He added.

"You too. Don't overwork and always camp at your studio." You put your arms around his neck.

"Coming from you?" He raised an eyebrow.

"You know I thought we were having a moment and you just ruined it." You scoffed and retracted your arms. But Mingi stopped you by abruptly standing up, carrying you with him. You instinctively wrapped your arms and legs around him as you squealed, worried that you could fall.

"I won't drop you, baby." Mingi laughed. He supported you with his hands under your thighs.

"I'm still scared." You said as you clutched onto him. That was when Mingi suddenly jumped, acting like he was going to drop you, making you shriek in fear.

"MINGI!" You cried out.

"Okay, okay. I'm sorry, baby." Mingi put you down with a cheeky smile on his face to say that he wasn't sorry at all.

"You're not sorry at all, Song Mingi." You glared at him, storming away from him.

"No, no. I'm really sorry." Mingi chased after you. When he finally caught you, you were on the phone with Wooyoung. Apparently he found out Mingi was "working" at your house and was upset the invitation was extended to him.

"We're just going over some lyrics." You chuckled. Mingi rolled his eyes at how dramatic Wooyoung was. But that didn't stop him from pulling you to him, burying his face in the crook of your neck.

"Don't let him come." Mingi whispered. The warmth of his breath against your ear made you shiver.

"N-Next time, I promise, Wooyoung." You spoke into the phone.

"Wooyoung, stop disturbing us. We're trying to work." Mingi snatched the phone from you. You could hear Wooyoung's outraged yelling but Mingi just hung up on him.

"Mings! That wasn't very nice." You scolded with wide eyes. Now you were worried Wooyoung might suspect something.

"Whatever." Mingi looked away from you, not feeling guilty at all. You moved yours arms off him and stretched your limbs.

"Are you still angry with me?" He asked but you just shot him a look and walked away. His eyes followed you as you went to lie down on your bed to rest.

"Come on, baby. Don't be angry anymore, please? I was just playing. Your reaction was too cute." He whined. Mingi's hands planted beside your head as he hovered over you to try and get your attention. All the while, Mingi maintained his smile as he looked down at you. He leaned down to try and kiss you but you blocked him.

"I'm going to nap." You stated.

"I like that plan." Mingi stole a kiss before gently laying himself down over you, resting his head on your chest like always.

It was hard to remain angry at a person like Mingi. Or maybe it was just because you had feelings for him and knew that you couldn't stay angry at him.

"You're lucky I love you." You whispered with a scoff, reaching down to hold Mingi's hand. He knew you thought he had fallen asleep but Mingi couldn't help the smile at your words.

'Love' or saying 'I love you' was still something you and Mingi had yet to really say to each other directly.

DING DONG DING DONG

You and Mingi got up to the sound of the frantic doorbell. Mingi kept you behind him as he slowly appraoched the door. He turned back to ensure that his whole body was shielding you, just in case there was danger behind the door.

"Open up!" At the familiar voice, you and Mingi relaxed, letting out sighs of relief. Mingi ran his hand through his hair to get rid of his bed hair while you ran to the bathroom.

"What are you guys doing here?" You heard Mingi open the door.

"Where's Indigo?" They all ignored him, pushing him aside to enter your home.

"She's in the bathroom." Mingi informed coolly. He noticed that the boys all had bags of food and drinks with them. They spread it out on the coffee table.

"Hey, everyone. What are you all doing here?" You blinked as you came out, wiping your wet hands with a tissue.

"We thought we could celebrate now since we don't have schedules tomorrow. We got food and drinks." Seonghwa explained. He wrapped his arms around you to hug you and you did hug him back but shot Mingi a shocked look. Mingi shrugged, completely unaware of this sudden surprise visit to your house.

"I told you we should have called before coming, hyungs. We just self invited ourselves to her house, all 7 of us." Jongho facepalmed while shaking his head.

"It's okay. I didn't have a chance to clean up though." You rubbed the back of your neck.

"Your house is already so clean." Yeosang assured.

"Luckily you guys brought food. I would be worried if you came over for dinner and my fridge isn't stocked." You chuckled, looking at the large amount of food they had brought with them.

"I missed you!" Wooyoung hugged you, rubbing his cheek against your lovingly.

"You just saw me two days ago." You laughed. Mingi glared at his group member, feeling uncomfortable with how close and long Wooyoung was holding you. He had never felt like this before, especially to someone that's practically his brother.

"Uh, Mingi. Could you help me take the plastics out?" Yunho cleared his throat, noticing how Mingi was staring.

"Sure." Mingi grumbled and went to his best friend.

"Your jealousy is really obvious." Yunho whispered softly. Mingi looked at Yunho, he didn't agree or deny it. He did his task and went to get rid of the trash.

"Can I get some plates and cutlery?" Mingi asked you. You stepped away from Wooyoung and San to help him in the kitchen.

"Here you go." You handed it to him.

Of course Mingi knew where everything was in your house but he was supposed to act like it was his 'second/ third' time coming over so he couldn't act like he could take things on his own.

"Indigo, ready for a live version of that Wanteez episode you like?" Jongho laghed, pulling out the soju bottles. San cringed while Yeosang had a worried look on his face. No doubt, he was one of the ones that remembered the events of that night. The other person being Yunho.

"I thought Mingi was sober... Guess he wasn't." You chuckled, taking out some shot glasses.

"I know how to act sober." Mingi corrected. Once you had everything, you sat down together. You tried to make it look like a coincidence that you sat beside Mingi by 'wanting to sit with Seonghwa'.

"Glasses up!" Yunho said.

"Indigo should make the toast." San suggested. Everyone turned to you as you tried to find the words to say.

"I don't know what you say during a toast... But thank you for all your hard work in producing the track and working with me. This is just the start of our rewarding journey. To us!"

"To Indigo!" The boys and you clinked shot glasses. You downed the alcohol in one shot.

"Let's go, Indigo!" Jongho said in English, making everyone laugh. He refilled your glass like how he constantly does with Mingi.

"Yah, don't go too fast and pressure her into drinking more. We've barely even got the chance to start eating." Mingi scolded. Thankfully, Seonghwa nodded in agreement so it didn't look like Mingi was being too protective of you.

"We're ready to pass out here." Seonghwa chuckled.

"Sure. But I don't think I have enough blankets for everyone though." You giggled.

"When you're blacked out drunk, having a blanket would be the least of your problems." Wooyoung pointed out. You took some rose tteokbokki in your plate to eat.

"Eat more, drink more!" Hongjoong said as he took a chicken wing. With you drinking, Mingi drank slower. He wanted to make sure you were okay and be sober if he had to take care of you after.

"Indigo's the one trying to get Hongjoong hyung drunk." Yunho pointed, laughing as you filling Hongjoong's glass.

"What?! Don't accuse me, Yuyu!" You glared in feign offense from his accusation.

"Indigo, don't regret it when they start singing. It'll be too late by then." Yeosang warned. You giggled as clinked glasses with Wooyoung to take another drink. With everyone getting slightly intoxicated, they didn't notice that Mingi was periodically adding food to your plate.

"Make sure you eat too." Mingi told you. You nodded obediently and ate. Seonghwa put a glove on to make the mini rice balls for everyone. He put one in your mouth.

"It's good." You covered your mouth as you chewed.

"You eat so well~" Seonghwa had a slightly crooked smile on as he patted your head with a clean hand.

"He's gone." Wooyoung stifled a laugh with his hand.

"Don't speak such nonsense, Jung Wooyoung. I'm fine. Refill my glass." Seonghwa held out his glass. Jongho gladly refilled the shot glass, all the way to the top.

"Stop giving him so much." Yunho slapped the maknae's shoulder. Yeosang sighed as he took more food to eat. San, who was being quiet, slowly chewed on his rice cake. He reminded you of a sloth, making you giggle.

"What's so funny?" Mingi leaned down.

"San's chewing the tteokbokki like a cute sloth." You giggled. The red faced male had a distant look on his face as he ate.

"I want a seaweed roll." You pointed. Mingi picked it up and dipped it into the spicy rice cake sauce before feeding it to you. He wiped the sauce at the corner of your lips.

"Thank you." You smiled as you chewed.

"You're welcome." Mingi smiled back. You were slightly tipsy as well that made you have this dazed look. Mingi thought you were adorable.

"Yeosang, are you not going to drink?" Hongjoong asked as he took a shot. Yeosang shook his head.

"I already had three, that's enough for me. Someone needs to remain sober to take care of you guys." Yeosang raised an eyebrow.

"Fine by me." Hongjoong shrugged. That meant he could let loose and drink too, without needing to keep an eye on the others. He refilled his glass to take another shot, reaching over to refill Seonghwa and your glass to.

"To our favourite child." Hongjoong toasted with you and Seonghwa, both having your arms around each other happily.

"To our best child." Seonghwa added, nodding in agreement.

"HEY!" There were protests coming from the others in the room despite being influenced by alcohol. But it was ignored as the three of you shared the toast and downed the shot.

Series Masterlist

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aois-amaterasu-painting · 2 months

Text

Black B- PASS- Special Issue - The GazettE - NINTH Reference book - (part 3 - Members interview translation)

■ Interviewer: Finally... after three years, a new original album!!

Aoi: Why are you trying to force the excitement? (laughs)

■ Interviewer: Please don’t tease me (laughs). Since this band interview will introduce the magazine, can you tell us your first thoughts upon completion?

Ruki: First thoughts? All I could think of was "death." There was nothing but death (laughs).

Uruha: (Laughs)

■ Interviewer: Death, you say (laughs). So you felt utterly spent.

Ruki: It felt like a posthumous work.

Reita: (Laughs) When it was done, it felt like, “Ah, we made it through.” When you’re extremely sleepy, it’s like…

Ruki: Turned to "nil" (laughs).

Reita: Yeah. And it’s amazing we finished in time.

Ruki: Anyway, I was thinking, "We have to make it in time!" But even when we did, it didn't feel like we could take a breather.

Kai: That's true. There was a sense of relief, but also a feeling of, “Did we really do everything we could?” (laughs). Now that some time has passed and I’ve listened to it repeatedly, I feel like we made a good piece of work. Of course, there were no issues (laughs).

Uruha: For me, after the mastering was finished and I listened to the final version, my first word was, “Fast.”

■ Interviewer: What do you mean?

Uruha: It’s about 45 minutes long, but it felt shorter. Like, “That was quick.” Even though we spent so much time on it, I thought, “Is that all?” (laughs). There was a sense of ephemerality in those 45 minutes.

Ruki: Your words just summed it all up... Thank you very much.

■ Interviewer: No, we’re not done yet (laughs). What about you, Aoi?

Aoi: If I only talk about the moment we finished... it was like I passed out, and then it was over (laughs).

Reita: That’s right (laughs).

Aoi: But everyone really did their best. By the end, everyone was working purely on willpower. The mixing took a long time, working from noon to morning, and then starting again at noon. But those behind-the-scenes stories don’t really matter to the listeners.

■ Interviewer: Since you’re all saying it was that tough, does that mean this was the hardest production process ever?

Aoi: The production process seems to get harder each year. Not just the music, but everything we release takes a considerable amount of time.

■ Interviewer: In recent years, it’s not just about judging the music but also doing more hands-on work yourselves, right?

Aoi: We want to release something we think is cool... because we are people who want to show everyone something we find cool. It’s a natural flow for it to take time. It’s not about how others evaluate it, but about showing everyone what we think is good. We want people to listen and feel it, so we get particular about it regardless of the time it takes. Of course, the workload varies, and we hardly saw each other towards the end, but being together for 16 years made it possible... Is it okay if we wrap up here?

■ Interviewer: Hahaha! So, we're still in we're still in the introduction part (laughs).

Ruki: Please structure it with bold letters like this.

Reita: Shall we move on to the personal interviews then? (laughs).

■ Interviewer: No, no (laughs). Let's go back to the topic. the GazettE is often seen as a band that emphasizes its worldview, but you are also a band that follows what you want to do at the time, making you quite free. From "TOXIC" to "DIVISION. BEAUTIFUL DEFORMITY," and "DOGMA," what direction were your desires headed in with "NINTH"?

Ruki: "DOGMA" was a conceptually strong album, so the songs had a certain direction. This time, we wanted to show that this is our ninth album, something that reflects our journey from the first album to now. Rather than focusing on a musical genre, it’s more about showing our life perspective—something that reveals the history of the GazettE.

■ Interviewer: So it’s a condensation of the GazettE’s trajectory.

Ruki: Yes. We’ve done many things to get to this point, and now we’re straightforwardly showing that. Without aiming for a particular image or how we want to be seen, we wanted to say, “This is the GazettE now.”

■ Interviewer: When this kind of guiding principle—being both a theme and not a theme—was presented, what did you all think?

Kai: It fit perfectly with being a theme yet not a theme. However, we didn’t specifically discuss it like we did with the "DOGMA" concept.

Ruki: Yeah.

Kai: It wasn’t something that could be understood simply. I kept wondering if there was something more to it. Of course, I knew it was our ninth album, but I initially thought the title “NINTH” was temporary. But when it was officially decided that the title would be “NINTH,” my thinking shifted to what RUKI mentioned.

Ruki: Regarding each song, I think we were talking about their positioning in live performances, whether they were fun, intense, or whatever.

■ Interviewer: I see. So, while it's full of aggression, there are also ballad-like, melodic, and melancholic songs.

Uruha: Yeah. At the initial stage, it was like deciding a setlist, keeping live performances in mind. That was always the foundation. Since the previous work "DOGMA" was such a strong image-driven project, we knew we weren’t going in that direction again. We thought it would be natural to go in a more straightforward direction this time. So, we naturally came up with songs while considering live performances. As the songs gradually came together, we sometimes felt a certain atmosphere was missing and created new songs to fill those gaps. But the basic approach was natural.

Aoi: So, while we were mindful of live performances, there wasn’t a clear overall vision. It was more about putting out songs and adjusting as we went along. Even when you talk about a “live feeling,” there are many different forms that can take.

■ Interviewer: So, as time passed, "NINTH" gradually took shape, and everyone started to share a concrete overall vision at the same time?

Uruha: Well, we might not have had a clear overall vision until the very end (laughs).

Aoi: Yeah, I think we didn't have one this time.

■ Interviewer: That’s surprising. Didn’t that make it more challenging?

Ruki: There was the difficulty of creating songs that fit, but we weren’t particularly aiming for a unified world view throughout the album. When you listen from start to finish, the flow was already good. It’s because we had “DOGMA” that we ended up this way. Instead of a single story like “DOGMA,” this album is more purely about the current the GazettE.

Aoi: That's right. It's different from saying we have no concept.

Ruki: Exactly. If you ask if there's no concept, it's more like, "Hmm..."

■ Interviewer: So, because you have 16 years of experience, you can naturally express what’s inside and shape it into an album?

Ruki: Yes… So, it was like making a typical album. Creating a piece with a beginning, middle, and end. The title reflects this too. It's not about having some big overarching theme, like the title suggests, but rather each song has its own world, expressing what "the GazettE of 2018" is about, I suppose.

■ Interviewer: I wonder if there's a deep meaning behind the word "NINTH" here.

Ruki: Well, that might have been typical for us in recent years. But honestly, I can't really say anything much about it this time (laughs).

Reita: Haha, yeah, that's true (laughs). Also, we've always been conscious of making something that shines in live performances, but I feel like that standard keeps getting higher each year. So, this album might just be a collection of things that meet that standard.

■ Interviewer: When the songs started coming together, did you all naturally understand and play them in sync with each other?

Ruki: How was it?

Reita: In terms of being in sync... This time, we really only gathered for pre-production at the very beginning (laughs).

Uruha: Well, there were parts that went smoothly and parts that were challenging. But we introduced a system for smoother data exchange this time, which made interactions between members less stressful than ever before.

Reita: Yes, we’re fully modern kids (laughs). It was very convenient.

Uruha: In the past, we’d email files, and if you missed the email, it could be a problem. This time, we had a place where the latest data was always available, so we just had to check there.

Ruki: Certainly, when the members gathered, there was always the task of taking something home with you, so the process of finalizing things was probably less than usual.

Reita: And (with emails), sometimes when you tried to download the data, it would already have expired.

Ruki: That happened a lot.

Reita: But that doesn’t happen anymore.

Uruha: It's hard to ask for a resend, so sometimes you just had to wait for the next one (laughs).

All: Hahaha!

■ Interviewer: You wouldn’t have to say, “Send it again,” which can delay things (laughs).

Aoi: Haha. But, it's really convenient, huh? Especially because corrections could be made quickly.

■ Interviewer: It seems like this approach really suits the current state of the GazettE. Just from this segment, it sounds like everything went incredibly smoothly, but...

Ruki: Actually, it was quite difficult (laughs). Especially the process of producing the songs. It’s like harvesting vegetables.

■ Interviewer: I see, starting from planting the seeds.

Ruki: Yes. And the cooking after harvesting is quite challenging too, waiting for the final product to be good.

■ Interviewer: So here we have 12 carefully selected masterpieces.

Ruki: Yes. There were some songs that weren't completed until the very last moment to ensure they were satisfactory. It's like that song from “Kiteretsu Daihyakka” - “What happened to the cabbage?” (laughs).

■ Interviewer: Which song was completed at the very last moment?

Ruki: ……………… Oh, it just smoothly went by. (laughs).

Reita: Ahahaha!

■ Interviewer: Oops, I should have reacted more! (The interviewer was not familiar with the opening theme of “Kiteretsu Daihyakka” called "Cooking March")

Ruki: It's okay. The 11th song, "ABHOR GOD."

Reita: That one was tough.

Ruki: It's the crucial part that leads towards the very end.

■ Interviewer: I heard that the whole band composed this song together, which is rare for the GazettE.

Ruki: Yes. Because I was working on the lyrics, I wasn’t able to join the band for that part.

Reita: Well, he was kind of like remote control (laughs).

Uruha: There were about three different versions... no, maybe more.

Kai: Yeah, there were more.

Reita: And in the end, it mutated suddenly.

All: Hahaha!

■ Interviewer: I see (laughs). The sing-along chorus “Wow - Wow” is also fresh for the GazettE.

Ruki: I recorded that part after everyone had already heard it. I didn't have time to let them hear the demo, so I presented it after recording it, saying, "Here it is." On the contrary, I was curious about how the four of them had created it together. When I asked Uruha, he said, "REITA jumped around..." and "We made it so that it would be jumpable."

Reita: Well, I just jumped around. And the next day, I had muscle pain.

All: Hahaha!

Aoi: I watched the process closely without getting too involved.

Ruki: This part was handled by Kai, this was what REITA mentioned, parts where members were involved are well reflected, I think.

Reita: When I sent the data and asked, “How is it?” RUKI responded with, “How do you all feel about it?” (laughs). He wrote something like, "Are you guys having doubts?"

Uruha: Well, we were (laughs).

Reita: RUKI probably had a different idea in mind. It wasn’t quite that… more like…

Ruki: Well, rather than different…

Kai: It was more like I received directions from RUKI saying, "I want it to feel like this," so I gathered up those keywords and started thinking from there.

Ruki: I thought it should be fun and intense, but the first sounds that came were quite maniacal. I thought, “Oh, maybe they’re struggling with it.”

All: Ahahaha!

Aoi: Especially these two (URUHA and KAI), they really felt responsible (laughs).

Uruha: We felt it, we felt it.

Kai: Yeah, yeah, yeah (laughs).

Ruki: When the song started to come together, it was quite dark at first, which made me feel a bit down.

Reita: (laughs) Sorry about that.

Ruki: There was just one phrase, an intro part in the original song. I personally thought, "Oh, that's good." So, I called and asked if it would be okay to use that as the intro.

Aoi: The rest was no good (laughs).

Ruki: No, no (laughs). We kept that part and just made the tempo a bit faster.

Uruha: Speeding up the tempo was tough.

■ Interviewer: That’s really a collaborative process for a song.

Ruki: If you say so (laughs). It might look like we flipped the table.

Reita: It felt like someone just ate the strawberries off the shortcake.

All: Ahahaha!

■ Interviewer: I see (laughs). That fun atmosphere can be felt in the sing-along parts.

Ruki: I thought it would be good to have that kind of vibe.

Aoi: So, it’s not us but the audience singing that part?

Ruki: I didn't think about it that far. Do you think they’ll sing it? In our case, even if we include such parts, our fans don’t usually sing along.

Reita: That’s true.

Ruki: It's like with "Maximum Impulse.” The members' faces just get redder and redder.

Reita: Yeah, especially me (laughs).

Aoi: Oh, I need to listen to the new chorus parts.

■ Interviewer: Yes, the new work seems to have a lot of chorus parts.

Ruki: We’ll verify it during rehearsal.

Aoi: Are there any parts that seem too difficult?

Ruki: I don’t think there were any.

Reita: Well, you say that every time (laughs).

Aoi: Sometimes, if the rhythm is completely different while playing, it’s the most tricky part.

■ Interviewer: I see. The new album also features melodious and emotionally charged songs with a straight beat, like "UNFINISHED," which might not have been possible in the previous album. Were you concerned that such impactful songs might overshadow others?

Ruki: No, not at all.

Aoi: Oh, we have a new perspective here.

■ Interviewer: Oh, really? (laughs) Did you also have the intention of showcasing the original coolness of visual kei, which is your forte?

Ruki: No, we didn’t have any intention of appealing outwardly. We just did what we thought was cool at the time. Things that might have seemed unconvincing or outdated before now feel better. We’ve always thought it’s better to be a band capable of various types of songs. After “DOGMA,” people might have assumed we’d continue in a certain direction, perhaps towards a more metal sound, but we didn’t think that way at all.

■ Interviewer: So, it wasn't intentional.

Ruki: Even if we’re good at something, it’s not intentional. On the contrary, sometimes we intentionally avoid certain things. During “DOGMA,” we purposely didn’t include audience singing parts. So, this time, it's more standard, I suppose.

■ Interviewer: Understood. And this time, you released the music video for "Falling," the practical opening track, ahead of the album. This is unusual for the GazettE, but it seems to show your unwavering confidence in the band now.

Kai: We weren’t particularly conscious of confidence in the band, but when RUKI created “Falling,” we all recognized it as the prologue of "NINTH." We felt it was the beginning.

■ Interviewer: Ah, so it's similar to the fans' perspective.

Kai: So for me, during the process of creating the song, I listened to "Falling" with the mindset that this is the prologue.

Uruha: And by not selling it, but instead choosing to release it for free, I think it definitely increased awareness. I think "Falling" was good because I heard that the evaluation of the song was high, which raised expectations for "NINTH." So, that song became a very good introduction, and I hope the album will continue to surprise with different approaches from "Falling" to "UNFINISHED." It feels like it was well-calculated, so it's ultimately alright.

■ Interviewer: Showing a glimpse of the album in advance didn’t have any negative impact; it made it more effective.

Uruha: Exactly. The album doesn’t continue with the same type of songs, so there’s no disappointment.

■ Interviewer: Aoi, how do you feel about the songs lined up in the album?

Aoi: There were parts where it was difficult to grasp the overall picture until it was completed, but the final result is very satisfying. Honestly, I didn’t expect it to fit together so well, but it turned out to be an album with a solid story.

Reita: Yes, it’s easy to listen to and has everything. We will perform other songs on the tour, but there won’t be any sense of discord when they’re combined, and I think this is the current ideal form of the GazettE.

Kai: As for me, the process was unusual and we were pressed for time, so I had mixed feelings. There were moments of anxiety, but also relief when it was finished. This album is packed with those feelings, and it’s different from anything we’ve done before. The process felt simultaneous with our emotions, rather than trying to catch up with them. The songs felt like they progressed alongside us, and I felt that strongly this time. It’s quite refreshing.

■ Interviewer: I see. How about you, Ruki?

Ruki: I poured a lot into each song, so I can’t look at them objectively yet. I have strong feelings for each song. But I can say that I put everything into it. Even though we were pressed for time, there was no compromise. It was a situation where we either compromised or didn’t sleep, and I think we managed to push through to the end. This applies to the staff and engineers as well. If I were in their shoes, I would have definitely quit. Normally, engineers don't stay overnight.

Kai: Haha, they might have felt like we were punishing them.

Ruki: So, I think what we've done up to this point won't happen again, and I feel like this album embodies that dedication.

All scans are from The Archive (rad-is-more) Interview translation is ChatGPT.

#the gazette #ninth #interview translations #ninth reference book

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slexenskee · 1 year

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Running List of No Scrubs Albums

Because even I can't keep up with them anymore lol. I'll update it as I go. Also yes there are 6 official albums with 6 songs each... because Gojo is lame lol. And yes the acoustic albums are 5 songs... because he's extra lame

Spotify Playlist

update as of 09/18/23 bc I'm a f** scrub with commitment issues clearly

1. Thanks, I Hate it Here:

The 2nd album by release order, but first in chronological order of when they played them live. Yes, Gojo was feeling himself in his classic FOB phase real hard on this one lol. I find the evolution of FOB's discography IRL to be really fascinating, so I wanted to emulate it in the fic. This album is almost entirely FOB because Gojo realized flopping around bands and genres was difficult for the rest of his band, so he decided to first focus on one kind of ‘sound’ until they got used to playing together.

Critics will later call it a bit unpolished and juvenile in comparison to the refined sound, themes, and quality production of later albums, with it's younger and simpler narratives. Thematically it tends to resonate more with a younger crowd, which people accredit to Ru-kun's assumed age of writing at the time (late teens). In other words, it becomes the quintessential 'middle school glory days' playlist for an entire generation of No Scrubs fans.

A Loaded God Complex - (Sugar We're Going Down) FOB

Reinventing the Wheel to Run Myself Over - FOB

In Too Deep - Sum 41

Homesick at Space Camp - FOB

A Little Less Sixteen Candles - FOB

Dance, Dance - FOB

2. Good News For People Who Love Bad News

This was No Scrubs' first album ever released on a streaming platform, but it compromises songs more from their 2nd live setlist chronologically. A cult favorite amongst the fans, this album is fun and bratty with a combination of punchy pop punk lyrics, theatrical narratives, and catchy hooks that become unanimous with the band's dramatic flair. No Scrubs always had a rep as an underground alternative band with petty delinquent vibes, but this album definitely solidified them as the patron saint of all the edgy and misunderstood goth punks.

At this point the band had been together for a few years and Gojo definitely felt satisfied with the way the band was coming together and wanted to throw in some more famous mid 2000s pop punk bands into the mix.

Nobody Puts Baby In The Corner - FOB

I'm Not Okay (I promise) - MCR

In One Ear - Cage the Elephant

But It's Better if You Do - Panic!

I Write Sins not Tragedies - Panic!

Jesus of Suburbia - Green Day

3. Death Before Decaf

After playing up the 'pop' quite a bit in the last album, No Scrubs digs deep into some gritty grunge roots with their third album, full of noisy amped up rock anthems. Thematically it was considered their strongest album at the time of release, with intense vocals and lyrics covering dark and personal topics beneath the guise of their distinctive and iconic instrumental riffs. The juxtaposition between the catchy sing-along hooks and the depressing deeper meaning to the words made this album an instant classic. It remains a fan favorite of music critics for Ru-kun's scorchingly honest handling of raw and deeply personal themes like suicide, depression, and substance abuses. After the identities of the band members became public, it became a hotly debated album amongst No Scrubs fans, who consider it a cathartic outlet for a lot of the trauma that turned Ru-kun into a villain, but also a worrying one full of suicidal ideation, alcoholism, drugs, and child abuse.

On his part, Gojo was feeling nostalgic for his youth and felt it an affront that the likes of Nirvana and Weezer had never been experienced in the MHA universe. He gets asked about these songs a lot, specifically about Today, Semi-Charmed Life, and Say it Ain't So, which all seem to allude to a dark history. He often tells people Semi-Charmed Life is one of his favorite songs ever, which doesn't help matters, and also alarms several psychologists, who worry he's romanticizing what was clearly a very unhealthy time in his life.

My Own Worst Enemy - Lit

Today is the Greatest - (Today) Smashing Pumpkins

Smells Like Teen Spirit - Nirvana

Come As You Are - Nirvana

Say It Ain't So - Weezer

Semi-Charmed Life - Third Eye Blind

4. Glass Onion Heart

Aka the "Baby boy who hurt you???" album inspiring sexuality crises across the world

Glass Onion Heart feels like a wild card of metamorphosis from No Scrubs' prior albums, with the addition of more electronic, pop, and synth instrumental mixing. Combined with the explosive and flashy tour that accompanied the album's release, it felt like a radical departure from the band's classic garage-band sound, into a more streamlined, pop format.

The album was met with divisiveness from fans, not helped by the news of the band's breakup following the album release and subsequent tour. While many adored the new direction, long-time fans mourned the loss of the quintessential indie and underground 'No Scrubs' aesthetic, especially when faced with the thought of their final album. Nonetheless, it was the band's most popular album at time of release by a wide margin. It certainly helped the album's popularity that Ru-kun did the entire tour in drag.

At this point fans the world over became intrigued by No Scrubs and their burgeoning fame, prompting Gojo to name the album 'Glass Onion' after the Beatles song of the same name, because there is no deeper meaning to any of his songs, he's literally ripping them off from bands that don't exist. Fans spend way too long trying to figure out who this album was inspired by - who could have possibly broken their precious Ru-kun's heart?? - and as we enlightened No Scrubs fans know, it was no one. Literally no one. Gojo just really liked this femme fatale vibe, and decided to cross dress the entire tour because of it.

Tokyo - The Wombats

Dance Floor Anthem - Good Charlotte

Thanks for the Memories - Fall Out Boy

I'm the Leading Man - (This Ain't a Scene) Fall Out Boy

Moving to New York - The Wombats

Misery Business - Paramore

5. Infinity on High

Hailed as a return to the unfettered, unabashed, anti-establishment garage-band jam-session appeal that had people flocking to No Scrubs in their heyday, this album made an intense splash as No Scrubs' Comeback Album. Despite the return to their signature gritty rock sound, this album was in fact the most produced of any of No Scrubs' albums. This album marks both the return of No Scrubs as well as their launch into global superstardom.

Ironically, Gojo named this after his favorite FOB album (I mean it IS called Infinity lol) despite not including a single FOB track. Fans widely consider "Island in the Sun" to be specifically about Hawks, which Gojo never confirms or denies (although he definitely did think the similarities to their island mission were amusing). In reality, the song that reminds him of Hawks - and himself - the most is Mayonnaise, which might be why it's one of his favorites.

Holiday - Green Day

Cherub Rock - Smashing Pumpkins

Cool Enough - (Mayonnaise) Smashing Pumpkins

1979 - Smashing Pumpkins

Island in the Sun - Weezer

Wake Me Up - (Wake Me Up When September Ends) Green Day

Bonus: Don't You Know Who (I Think) I AM? Acoustic Album

The first of Ru-kun's unexpected - and according to Makoto, utterly unplanned - acoustic albums, this bonus LP was met with delight and excitement from fans after Ru-kun had teased its release on Twitter. The intimate and personal nature of the simplistic mixing gave this album a cult following, and brought in a new segment of music fans that No Scrubs' music normally didn't appeal to.

Nobody Puts Baby In the Corner - Fall Out Boy

Grand Theft Autumn - Fall Out Boy

My Heart is the Worst Kind of Weapon - Fall Out Boy

Notion - Rare Occasions

No Such Thing - John Mayer

Bonus: Take (Me) With a Grain of Salt

Despite the critical acclaim this acoustic album (and the full band versions eventually released afterwards) it was met with a lot of incendiary response at the time of its release. No Scrubs had finally achieved global stardom and was regularly topping hit charts across the world with the release of their album Infinity on High - and while music critics unanimously praised the EP as a worthy contender for Album of the Year, it was generally acknowledged truth that the album's popularity was owed in no small part to lead singer Ru-kun's sudden infamy that coincided at the same time.

The unfathomable depths of Ru-kun's new celebrity status in parallel to the band's brand of off-label, anti-establishment themes created friction within the fanbase. Many accused them of taking advantage of the current media coverage to promote sales, which bassist and band leader Makoto clapped back as 'just doing smart business'. In general, consensus was positive towards the sentiment; capitalizing on Ru-kun's fame and releasing an album in parallel to his identity reveal was just genius marketing.

However the timing of the release of Ru-kun's second acoustic album kicked up the discourse once again, with fans decrying the release as 'a fake sellout' aimed to exploit current gossip trends. However the album's drop was sudden and unexpected - with little to no pre-release marketing - lending credence to the narrative that Ru-kun wrote this album under the emotional duress of his personal life at the time.

Due to the staggering popularity of the acoustic album, the band eventually recorded and released a B-Side with full band versions.

Disenchanted - MCR

Stay Together For the Kids - Blink-182

Iris - Goo Goo Dolls

How's It Going To Be - Third Eye Blind

All These Things That I've Done - The Killers

#fic may death never stop you #music recs #mdnsy art

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cherrylng · 1 month

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Muse interview - Matt Bellamy [CROSSBEAT (March 2000)]

“My most fundamental motivation for going into music was to give eternal life to human emotions.”

Muse, a trio of explosive lyricists who mix cross-cultural blood with modern sensibilities, have finally landed in Japan! Matthew Bellamy's spirituality, the heart of a band that respects Radiohead but aims to be ‘somewhere different’. Interview: Sumi Imai

“I think music is best listened to when you're alone. Because it's music that makes you connect with something beyond the material.”

Muse, who hail from Devon in south-west England, were discovered by Maverick in the US as ‘promising newcomers’ and signed independently, followed by individual record deals in five countries around the world, including the UK, Germany, France and Japan, making their debut on an international scale not seen in recent years. Now, Muse is coming to Japan! At just 21 years of age, their first album ‘Showbiz’ strikes the listener's soul raw with instinctively stirring dramatic sounds and melancholy melodies. Matthew's (vocals/guitar/keyboards and lyrics/composition) singing, which is sensitive yet expresses emotions that seem to rise from within, dark, edgy and loud guitars, and melancholic and beautiful melodies have often led to them being described as ‘the three-piece Radiohead of the new millennium’, but of course they are no mere followers. Their music has the shadowy danger and tension of Radiohead, the dynamism, drive and gloss of Mansun (for the second album) and the bare intensity of Nirvana…… They create a unique "Muse world" by weaving in exotic elements (including flamenco-style guitar!). At the age of 14, Matthew joined the band of his secondary school classmate Dominic (drums). Two years later, Chris (bass) joined the band, which became the original Muse and continues to this day. We caught up with Matthew after he had been back home for a while, amidst a packed schedule of European tour dates.

You have always liked Spanish and South American music, as well as classical and choir music. I think that this diversity of musical influences is what sets Muse apart musically from other bands. 「Yes, that's true. Since I was a kid, I grew up listening to all kinds of music, regardless of genre. When I first learnt to play guitar, it was blues and slide guitar, and I started to get into rock when I was 13 or 14. When I graduated from high school, at the age of 17, I spent about four months travelling around Europe on holiday. I wanted to learn a lot of guitar music there that I wasn't used to hearing before. I went to Greece and Italy just to listen to the different kinds of folk music from different places. It was an experience that opened my eyes to the possibilities of what I could do with the guitar. I also used to play classical music like Rachmaninoff and Chopin on the piano. So maybe I'm trying to fuse all kinds of music.」

You started your first band at the age of 12, and it all started around the same time (1991 or 1992?). Was it grunge or something like that? 「Oh, no, no (laughs), it was actually a jazz-ish band.」

Oh, really? 「I was playing the piano in a boogie-woogie or rock ‘n’ roll kind of way. Then I started playing electric guitar and joined Dom's (Dominic) band. His band was so cool at school, everyone wanted to be in it (laughs).」

Wow (laughs). I heard that they played songs by Mega City Four and Senseless Things. 「Yeah, Dom's band used to play that kind of stuff, and we used to cover other British indie bands like Ned's Atomic Dustbin and Wedding Present. I started learning those songs when I joined that band.」

I see. By the way, you said, "The only bands that really mattered in the 90s were Nirvana and Radiohead during 'The Bends' era. What made these two bands stand out was their pure vulnerability in exposing themselves and innovation". You seem to be obsessed with ‘innovation’, but if there was a ‘new sound’ that Muse could present to the current scene, what would it be? 「Well, I'm not very good at describing what I do in words (laughs). But…… When I mentioned Nirvana and Radiohead, I think I was trying to talk about the ‘guitar music’ they produced. In terms of guitar-based music and its development, from Jimi Hendrix, Elvis, the Beatles and the Who to the Sex Pistols…… I think they're important bands to put in that queue. But yeah, it's hard to talk about ourselves because we're just starting out (laughs), we've got a long way to go.」

So what do you want to create in the future? 「I want to be honest about what I feel at the time. This time I've incorporated classical piano music and organic Spanish elements, but I want to combine these atmospheres in modern rock. There are so many different kinds of music in this world. Music has a long, long history. Different countries have different music. I think it's important to keep an open mind and listen to everything, to get in touch with what's happening in the world, past and present, and to develop what you create.」

I see, I understand. By the way, when UK bands expand into the US, the usual pattern is for them to establish themselves in the UK to some extent, then play small shows in the US…… But you guys are doing a big expansion on your own with your record company in the US. Many of your favourite bands - Nirvana, Primus, Rage, Smashing Pumpkins - are from the US, but do you think success in the US is important for you guys? 「Hmm, it's a challenge for us. It's a big country and I think it takes time to become a thing. The fact that the US music scene/rock music has been so creative for the last five years or so is what I'm really interested in. I think the next couple of years are a good time to bring song-oriented music to the US scene. There's been a bit of an emphasis on heavy metal music over there for a while now. But (success in the US) has never been the most important thing for me. I'd rather be successful in my home country, the UK, than the US.」

I see. But when you went to the US, you were greeted with limousines and champagne, which is unbelievable hospitality for a new British band. 「Hahahahaha (laughs), yeah, yeah.」

When it comes to being treated so well since your debut, do you take it easy and think, "I'll just take what they give me"? Or do you always calmly tell yourself, "Don't get carried away by this. Keep your feet on the ground"? 「Yeah, I don't think we take the situation too seriously. So it's more like ‘enjoy it while you have it’. We know it's all just for the moment, it won't last. We know it's just to make a good impression on us. We know we haven't earned it yet. Anyway, we don't even know if that's what we really want to get. It's just a bit of fun. It's not like I believe life should be like that or anything.」

Hmmm… that's rather cool (laughs). By the way, what ambitions did you have when you were 16, when all three Muse members were together? 「At the time…… I was like, "We're going to be the biggest in the world" (laughs), hahaha. But that kind of thing changes as you get older.」

And now? There are bands like Manics [aka Manic Street Preachers], who made their debut with the enthusiasm of "We're going to be number one in the whole world" (laughs), and then there are bands like Elastica, who say "If we can do what we love, sell 10,000 copies of our albums, and can make a living, that's enough". 「Yeah, it's possible for those two extremes to coexist inside of you. For example, to put it in an extreme way, a part of me thinks, ‘I'm happy just to exist’. Music gives me so much joy that I enjoy just being able to spend time with it, to focus on new ideas and creating something. My main motivation for continuing with music is to keep having the opportunity to create new things and to communicate with other people through it. I think that's the most important thing. There is more than one way to maintain that situation. I think I'd be just as happy if I could just make a living or if I was the most famous person in the world.」

But when we get too big, for example, there are some things we can't control. Like the suffering that fame brings, not to mention the example of Kurt Cobain…… 「Yeah……」

Also, I don't know if you've seen this, but from the Radiohead documentary video— 「Yeah, I've seen about half of it.」

From that you can also get a sense of the kind of madness they put themselves through. Do you have any fear or preparedness for that sort of thing? 「It's easy sometimes to take your situation and everything too seriously. It's easy to get depressed and wallow in self-pity, but I think that's boring. For example, I don't think the situation in that video was actually as bad as it appears on the screen. I think they were deliberately shot to look like they were in a bad situation in order to portray the image they had at the time. I know, I've been on tour for a long time now, and it's actually not that bad, I enjoy it. I mean, I try to enjoy it as much as I can. That's what life is all about. I don't feel the need to dwell on the bad aspects of it, because it's the most enjoyable experience of my life, even though I don't like some of it. I don't think that feeling will ever change.」

One of the unique characteristics of Muse's music is that it is full of deep, intense and real emotions - in the overall sound, in your guitar and piano, and of course in the songs. 'There are many ways that people do and create music - as a means of self-expression, as a means of communication, as a therapeutic role, etc. What is the greatest significance of music for you? 「Well, I guess…… The most fundamental motivation for me towards music was to give eternal life to human emotions. I mean, the feeling that after we die, the feeling remains in the world. That's the first thing, or in other words, I believe in the existence of the soul. Sometimes people can be confused by the body. They feel frustrated by the material world. Art and music express our emotions and show us that there is more to life than material things. Music is a way of connecting with people in a different way beyond the material world.」

You mean a spiritual way? 「Yeah, I think that's probably what it is. I think art exists to express what we feel inside and to communicate with people beyond natural phenomena, if there is such a thing as spirituality. Everyone expresses themselves in different ways, but most of the songs on the first album are about my relationship with the outer material world.」

Hmmm. On a different note, there have been a lot of comparisons to Radiohead, but I was impressed by how you coolly analysed and answered, "Well, I don't mind, I've never really been a fan of Radiohead. If you think about the fact that Thom Yorke was influenced by Jeff Buckley and that our album was produced by John Leckie (who produced ‘The Bends’), it's an understandable comparison." I think there are a lot of bands who, when they're as young as you are, would be very dismissive, but you handle it well, probably because of your own respect for them. 「Yeah, it's certainly partly because of the respect for what they've achieved. And I understand the comparisons for the reasons I've just mentioned. But the comparisons don't mean that we're treated as a copycat band.」

Yes, that's right. When you said that, you also said, ‘But if you see us live, you'll see that Muse is more of a rock band’, 「Yeah, it's just that if you see us live, you can better understand what we actually sound like as a band. On the record we're more experimental, we use different instruments, we sound like a five or six-piece [band], but live it's just the three of us, and I think the emotion hits you harder. And we're definitely from a different generation (to Radiohead)…… So I think we're appealing to a different generation.」

Oh, a different generation…… So what do you actually think of 'OK Computer'? Considering the sound and structure of that album, I thought that what you said earlier meant that yours is a more straightforward and powerful rock. 「I think 'OK Computer' is a good album, I just don't listen to it too intensely. It probably didn't have the same influence on me [as 'The Bends']. Maybe it's partly because I listened to 'The Bends' at a certain time of year that it appealed to me more clearly. I think 'OK Computer' is a good album, but it doesn't resonate with me the way 'The Bends' does. I think it's probably a generational thing, an age thing.」

Oh, I see. Well, this is just my personal impression, but I feel that Radiohead's sound is largely a journey of self-exploration towards inner chaos, while Muse's sound is more outward-oriented with ‘the intention to connect with the listener’. The guitars and singing seem to speak to us. For example, in your live performances, are you conscious of the presence of the listener in that sense? 「Yes, for example, I've loved going to gigs since I was a kid, and the most exciting thing was when a singer would perform to me as if they were talking to me. I'm very conscious of people as 'individuals', not as a ‘crowd’, and I try to be conscious of that. I try to imagine that I'm part of the audience, and I try to put myself in their shoes. I think music, especially albums, are best listened to when you are alone. Because music makes you feel you are not alone and connects you to something beyond the material. I don't think Muse's music is appropriate to play when you're all gathered at a friend's house having a drink and having a good time. I don't think it's the right music for that kind of background music. I think it's more the kind of music that you can listen to when you're alone and feel something different…… I mean, I hope so (laughs).」

Translator's Note: The earliest Muse interviews that can be found in Crossbeat and Rockin'On were all released on their March 2000 issues, with INROCK only releasing theirs on April 2000. But out of three, I think Crossbeat has the best early interview by far, thanks to how good of a journalist Sumi Imai is. Their interviews just reveals Matt and his bandmates in a way that most other western music magazines and newspapers don't.

Or it's just because Japanese interviews tend to reveal the conversation of questions and answers as it was recorded back then, so there's no backfilling of sorts at all.

#Matt Bellamy #Dom Howard #Chris Wolstenholme #Muse #Muse band #Showbiz era #my scan #translation #interview #CROSSBEAT #CROSSBEAT March 2000

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