#you can probably play the game without the audio

[homunculus-argument]

I know it would probably be a logistical nightmare to also make this accessible to the actual people represented, but I think it would be cool to have a game where the whole point is that every character has different limitations, that make it impossible or at least incredibly difficult to get past the whole game without switching them every once in a while, and the way you switch is by going to another character and asking their help with something.

Like you start out the game with one character and go "oh huh, the colour sceme of this game is really cool, really interesting use of such a limited palette", play through the puzzles for a while, and then encounter something where you're supposed to arrange some slightly differently coloured puzzle pieces to the right order by shade or something, and it's goddamn impossible. No matter how many methods you try, it's just not clicking, no matter how logical your solutions seem, no matter how clearly they can't be arranged in any other way that'd make more sense.

And maybe you go online to ask people "hey I'm stuck in the colour puzzle, what the hell am I supposed to do to get past this?" and someone tells you to go find one of the other playable characters and ask for their help. Which sounds patronising and stupid but you're stuck so you might as well give it a try. You go to one of the other characters, choosing the dialogue option to go "hey I need a hand with something, I can't do this on my own", and when they go "sure, let's go", your controls now switch to the other character.

And the colour scheme switches immediately. The aesthetic limited palette has changed to a far wider range, there's details in the environment that you hadn't noticed, like the muted faint flowers on the ground are actually bright red, the greyish shirt that your first character was wearing is actually striped with orange and green. The first POV character is colourblind, this whole time you haven't been able to perceive the difference between green and red. Solving the colour arranging puzzle with the other character is a breeze.

And this is the repeating theme of the game - every character has their own limitations, and while none of the puzzles are easy, you learn to think "maybe I should ask someone to help me with this" whenever you've been stuck for an unreasonable amount of time. You need to grab a buddy along for the quests, or you'll need to go back to get one eventually, and the way the game is structured somehow ensures that you can't just tactically dodge the limitation puzzles beforehand. Deaf character's POV doesn't have the audio clues that different pieces of the same puzzle make a different clicking sound, the puzzle with garbled numbers on it stops being garbled when you're not playing the character with dyscalculia.

You slowly get to know the whole cast, and occasionally help them out with things, too. You know which character could probably help with something you're stuck with, but while they'd be glad to come help, they're unfortunately stuck doing some task that could take you 20 minutes but is going to take them all afternoon, and you can offer help. Sometimes the helping-a-buddy-out minigames don't come with any direct transactional reward, you can just help a friend with something just because you can.

And the game's whole goal isn't to just illustrate how different people have different strengths, and sometimes things that are easy for you are hard for someone else, and vice versa, but to condition the player to think "maybe I should just ask someone to help, instead of wasting time struggling on my own."

[catskets]

A more in-depth guide for creating visual novels, especially in the horror, horror-romance, etc circles

Some of you have seen my previous, smaller post on crafting visual novels, especially in this little space of Tumblr that a lot of us have found themselves in. Since that post took off, I've wanted to create a longer guide to help touch on some points I've thought about for the past few months.

In case you've never heard of me, I'm Kat, also known as catsket. I have a Bachelor of Fine Arts in Game Design. I've been making games for nearly 5 years, and I've been doing visual novels more "professionally" for 2. You may know me for Art Without Blood, 10:16, God is in the Radio, or Fatal Focus. I'm here to help you make your first visual novel.

Please note that my advice does not fit everyone, and you may disagree with what I say. That's okay! It doesn't work for all. That's why there's thousands of resources out there.

FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE NEVER MADE A GAME

So, you have an idea for a huge visual novel. Horror, a shady and obsessive love interest, a little bit of woo-hooing. 100k words. Maybe a million. What is this, the 07th Expansion?

I notice a lot of people getting into visual novels are artists first. That's okay! I wanted to do art for games before I realized how much I enjoyed writing. And even less of you have probably touched Visual Studio. Again, perfectly okay. We all start somewhere.

My number one piece of advice? Make shitty games.

What does that mean?! My recommendation to those who have never done games is to make a bunch of shitty ones. Think of a theme, or hell, even join a game jam, where you make a game that fits a theme in a short amount of time. Spend about a week on your game. Focus on making something polished. Polish your mechanics. Polish your output.

I recommend, if you can, to make at least 4-6, if not more, kind of shitty games before hopping into longer projects. Making a game is a skill, just like art, just like writing. And game development is combining ALL of these together into one big soup being stirred by a skeleton hand puppet. You'll get into the rhythm and see what works for you.

It also helps you learn, perhaps, the second most important thing here: do you even like making games? There are cases out there where people have created video games (not saying visual novels) just for clout. That's no fun for you, that's no fun for your players. And you might go through this process and find that you don't like making games. That's completely okay! It's not for everyone.

Also, you can use these shittier games to gather an audience. I've built my audience because, for the past few years, I've been releasing games that slowly give me growing fields of eyes every day. A success story overnight is a rare one. It takes time. It's like building a brand, but you aren't a brand, you're an artist.

REV UP YOUR ENGINES!

Ren'py is the number one engine you will be recommended. It is very beginner-friendly, with lots of tutorials, assets on itch.io to use and download, and support. The engine comes with a few tutorials in the form of games, whose code you can freely browse. This is the engine I use most often. Most visual novels you see are made in this engine.

Twine is a text-based engine that most people use for interactive fiction. You can add images and audio, though, if you don't mind messing with HTML. I use Twine for text games and for outlining for my larger games. Ever played Degrees of Lewdity? Yeah, I know you have. Don't ask why. That game was made in Twine.

RPG Maker has multiple versions and has been used for exclusively VNs if you don't mind fucking around with plugins. It can definitely give your game a super unique feel. I recommend RPG Maker MV, since it has the most resources. This line of engines usually costs money, but it often goes on sale for under $5-$15.

People will recommend TyranoBuilder, but as a user and player, the lack of options and the format the games often come in is just...not fun to navigate. It advertises itself as little to no code, but it's often evident in the final results. Some good games have been made in it, though, so if you want to use it for prototyping/practice, you can. I'm not a fan, but that doesn't mean that fans don't exist! This engine costs money.

Not an engine, but check out Ink! Super useful scripting language that's used for more professional projects.

DEMOS, DEMOS, DEMOS

You've got an idea for a long-term project, and now you want to show it to the world! But wait, wait, don't do that yet!

When should I start advertising my game? This is a personal opinion, but I say that you should not start advertising your game until 50-60% of your demo is complete. Why? As I've discussed with some fans of indie VNs, they can name quite a few projects that have been in the "working on the demo" age for 1-2+ years. I've been in the Kickstarter MMO circles. If you, making a single-player experience with little mechanics to balance and polish (aka a visual novel), are taking that long on a demo, I am going to assume the game is not coming out. There are some games I have seen out here that have been in "working on the demo" phase where I haven't seen a single ounce of what the project will look like.

What should I put in my demo? The purpose of a demo is to showcase the mechanics and the vibes and the mechanics of your game. It's a demonstration. In my last post, I pointed to the Dead Space 2 demo that was showcased at E3 (RIP), that takes place about 2 hours into the story and shows how enemies are defeated, some animations, bits of the story, etc. Usually, because it's less about mechanics and more about vibes, visual novel demos showcase a certain percentage of the full thing (5-10%.) Can you showcase the vibe of the game here and what players should expect? If not, show off another portion.

How long should I work on my demo? Before, I said 3-4 months. That can be true, that can also not be true. Think about how long the demo takes you in proportion to how long the actual game should take you. Don't put too much effort. The demo is to showcase the vibe. It's to see how much the public and fans may enjoy the game.

My game is 18+, what should I do? Make a splash screen when the game is downloaded to let players know your game is 18+. If it's going to contain sexual content, you can hide it with itch.io's adult content filter. Write it on the page itself that your game is for adults only. Don't put your demo behind a paywall. This is genuinely ridiculous. The purpose of a demo is to showcase what a game is like before a player purchases it. That defeats the point of a demo. I've seen this happen, and it discourages players from approaching, especially because most demos never make it past the demo phase. So...I'm paying you $10 for 2-3k words of a game that may never come out?

Should I make a social media for my game? YES! Go for it. These anchors are how people will find your game. Make a Tumblr and open that ask box. Make a Twitter. Go to BluSky. Advertising is not bad. Some YouTubers even take e-mail suggestions from developers. Feel free to shoot your shot. The worst they can do is not respond.

HOW TO SET UP YOUR ITCH.IO PAGE:

Getting your itch.io to a presentable state can be very challenging! There's many ways to do it. I highly recommend using this page image guide for learning how to size your images to make your page pop!

Itch.io themselves has suggested to not publish a page until the game or demo is released. You can make the page and keep it as a draft, but do not publish it until you're ready!

Your cover image is the image that will appear in the search of the website, on any front pages, in collections, and on your profile. What have I seen that works? Key art of one of the characters up close and the title of the game! If you can make it a .GIF, do it! Bitches love .GIFs!

Itch.io recommends 3-5 screenshots on your page. I recommend 1 of these 5 be a .GIF that shows how gameplay feels. This is effective, even for visual novels!

Write a 3-5 sentence summary about your game for the description. What is your story about? What is the draw?

DO NOT BE ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE WHO IS GOING TO SAY "This is not like other visual novels. It doesn't have that cheesy this or that or-" No one cares. Genuinely. You're putting down other games in your genre and elevating yourself to the pompous level.

TAG YOUR GAME! itch.io gives you a list of tags to choose from when you go to tag. DON'T USE THIS! Try to go for more specific tags. Arimia has a very good guide on how to use itch.io's tagging system to your advantage.

GENERAL GAME MAKING ADVICE

SCOPE KNIFE IS SUPER USEFUL! Everyone makes games that are way over their workload. It's okay to cut out features and add them later. Prioritize making a finished game before hitting those stretch goals.

PLAN, PLAN, PLAN! Writing outlines is super helpful. I use Twine for my outlines, because you can connect your passages together and make really well-thought webs.

IT'S OKAY TO ASK FOR HELP! Whether it's from friends, professionals, or anything in-between. They can help with assets, editing, etc.

HONE YOUR SKILLS OUTSIDE OF GAMES! Write some poetry. Do some sketches everyday. Improve on your craft to improve your games

MUSIC IS HARD. THERE ARE RESOURCES. Most of us aren't musicians. That's okay. Make sure the music you get for your game is allowed to be used. You can use anything non-commercial if your game will not cost money or donations. I try to do songs in the public domain or free to use overall with credit if I don't have a musician. Consult the Creative Commons website if you're unsure how you're supposed to use a certain piece of music. If you don't use the right stuff, not only can it put you in legal trouble, but it can put streamers in hot water if they play your game and they can't upload the video because music is copyrighted.

PLEASE, DO SOMETHING ABOUT YOUR UI. Wanna know an easy way to get your game to look more professional? Edit the damn UI for your game. Make a new textbox, even if it's just a black box. Change the font. Eventually, players recognize the defaults and patterns of games made in certain engines and may attribute a lack of UI changes to a developer being lazy. It doesn't take very long to change the colors around and move text! Please do it to add a little pop to your game.

DEADLINES ARE AWESOME. Not everyone works well under pressure, but if you give yourself an infinite amount of time to make something, it'll never get done. Set goals for yourself for how much you can work on something.

IF YOU HAVE TO GIVE UP, GIVE UP. Making things is hard, especially long-term. Emergencies happen, jobs happen, life happens. Let your fans know that a project isn't happening anymore. Don't leave them in the dark. You don't need to tell strangers your medical history or anything, but transparency + honesty are really hot traits. You should use those in your creative work. This is one reason why I advocate for not publishing or advertising things until you know it's stable.

SHOWCASING YOUR CONTENT

People love to see WIPs for games! This is what the devlog is good for! A devlog is a post where a developer talks about and showcases some things happening in the game? What can you add to your dev log?

PERCENTAGES! How much of the artwork is done? How much of this character's route is done?

SNEAK PEEKS AT ARTWORK AND SPRITES!

GIFS! GIRLS LOVE GIFS!

Anything else to showcase your game's content! Posting consistent updates retains and even gains a fan's attention for your work.

RUNNING YOUR TUMBLR

You've joined us, and you've made a Tumblr for your blog! Link it on the itch.io page, so people can come find you after playing your awesome demo!

Do I have to respond to every ask? No. It's your blog. Delete whatever asks you want.

I got a hate comment! What do I do? Delete it and move on. I have a more detailed section on hate below.

I want to interact with [blog]! How do I do that? Reach out to the devs for silly little collabs. If you come onto a developer slightly headstrong, they might feel you are being abrasive or using them for content.

If people make fan content, interact with it! Encourage it! Reblog it. Show your love.

OTHER IMPORTANT THINGS

PROFESSIONALISM IS KEY. These may be pet projects, but you want to appear some level of professional on your actual itch.io page.

Being dismissive of player and fan complaints or criticisms will make you appear childish.

If your game is broken, fix it. I have been told by some amateur developers to ignore game-breaking bugs. It does not make me, a player, want to engage with your content. It seems messy and unfinished.

With the above point, it's 100% okay to have bugs and errors upon release. Every developer and their brood mother has. To decrease these issues, get playtesters. Friends can play your games, spot any errors, and help you point out things that can be improved upon. I recommend having playtesters at every stage of development.

Make sure your game runs before you publish it. Please.

You can still be silly and giddy! There's no reason to not be, especially when you get positive comments! The point of this is to not be outright rude to potential players and fans.

IGNORE HATE COMMENTS. In this case, a hate comment is a statement that contains no constructive criticism and are only here to be insulting or malicious. People are going to leave you with actual piles of dog shit in your ask box. They are trying to provoke you. Giving hate comments any attention, even if you're there to "clap back" proves that they got to you, even if you don't take the hate to heart. They will continue to pester you. Delete any hate comments and ignore them completely. Laugh about them with friends in a private setting, sure.

THINK BEFORE YOU REFERENCE! I know one big thing in this community is adding references to other games in yours, such as plushies of other characters or putting them on posters. The best thing you can do it ask the developer before adding this. How would you feel if some random person you've never met put your character in a video game? Most of us would feel weird and potentially violated. Open communication with devs is awesome. I am usually okay with it as long as someone asks for permission.

As a complete aside, I prefer more tasteful references to other games as opposed to 523482346 plushies and posters. These have been slightly overdone. Why not theme a candy after another game's character? Maybe your characters know each other.

OTHER RESOURCES I RECOMMEND

Devtalk is a server dedicated to independent visual novel creators. You can find jobs, resources, advice, talks, and, like, everything there! Devtalk is super useful. Everyone in there is so cool. They have a really great and comprehensive list of resources that I could not even begin to cover.

Visual Novel Design is a great YouTuber. No other words, check the guy out!

Ren'py and whatever other engine you're using has documentation that's super useful to follow.

Arimia not only has amazing VN resources, especially for marketing, but she also just has? Amazing games that you should check out?

And for a shameless self plug, I'm the lead of Sacred Veins, a collective of devs creating narrative games, whether it be horror, humor, romance, or everything in-between. Come hang out with us!

[vaadazen-codes]

How To Get Started Making Visual Novels

Wanna make a visual novel? Or maybe you've seen games like Our Life, Blooming Panic, Doki Doki Literature Club, etc. and wanna make something like that? Good news, here's a very basic beginners guide on how to get started in renpy and what you need to know going in! Before you start, I highly recommend looking at my last post about writing a script for renpy just to make it easier on you!

LONG POST AHEAD

Obviously, our first step is downloading it from their website

thankfully, its right on the home page of their site. Follow basica program installation steps and run the program. I highly recommend pinning it to your task bar to make it easier to access.

From there, you're met with the renpy app, it's a little daunting at first but let's talk about what all these buttons are for.

Projects

This part is simple, it just lists the current projects in the chosen directory. You probably won't have any in there of your own. You should still see Tutorial and The Question!

Both of those default projects are super helpful in their own ways, i highly recommend testing out the tutorial and playing around with it just to get comfortable with some of the basics.

Create New Project

The first step to actually making your game into a game!

You'll be met with a prompt letting you know that the project is being made in English and that you can change it. You can click Continue.

From here, you'll be asked to input a project name! Put in your games title, or even a placeholder title since this Information can be changed later! (this is also the title the folder will be in your file browser, be sure to name it something you won't overlook)

Now we get to choose our resolution!

If you have no idea what to choose, go for 1920x1080! This is the standard size for most computer monitors and laptops, but it will still display with moderately decent quality on 4k monitors too!

You can choose 3840x2160 as well. This is 2x the measurements of the default, with the same ration. These dimensions are considered 4k. Keep in mind, your image files will be bigger and can cause the game to have a larger size to download.

Now we get to choose our color scheme!

Renpy has some simple default options with the 'light mode' colors being the bottom two rows, and the 'dark mode' colors being the toop two rows.

You can pick anything here, but I like to choose something that matches my projects vibes/colors better. Mostly because depending on how in depth you go with the ui, it minimizes the amount of changes I need to make later.

Click continue and give it a minute. Note: If it says "not responding" wait a moment without clicking anything. It can sometimes freeze briefly during the process.

Now we should be back at our home screen, with our new project showing. Let's talk about allll that stuff on the right now.

Open Directory

This just opens that particular folder in your local file explorer!

game - is all the game files, so your folders for images, audio, saves, and your game files like your script, screens, and more.

base - this is the folder that the game folder is inside of. You can also find the errors and log txt files in here.

images - takes you to your main images folder. This is where you wanna put all of your NON gui images, like your sprites, backgrounds, and CGs. You can create folders inside of this and still call them in the script later. EX: a folder for backgrounds , a folder for sprites for character a, a seperate folder for spirtes for character b, etc.

audio - Takes you to the default audio folder. This is empty, but you can put all your music and sound effects here!

gui - brings up the folder containing all of the default renpy gui. It's a good place to start/ reference for sizes if you want to hand draw your UI pieces like your text box!

Edit File

Simple enough, this is just where you can open your code files in whatever text/code editor you have installed.

Script.rpy - where all of your story and characters live. This is the file you'll spend most of your time in at first

Options.rpy - Contains mostly simple information, like project name and version. There aren't a ton of things in here you need to look at. There is also some lines of code that help 'archive' certain files by file type so that they can't be seen by players digging in code however. Fun if you want to hide some images in there for later or if you just dont want someone seeing how messy your files are. We've all been there

Gui.rpy - where all of the easy customization happens. Here you can change font colors, hover colors, fonts, font sizes, and then the alignment and placement of all of your text! Like your dialogue and names, the height of text buttons, etc. It more or less sets the defaults for a lot of these unless you choose to change them later.

Screens.rpy - undeniably my favorite, this is where all of the UI is laid out for the different screens in your game, like the main menu, game menu, quick menu, choice menu, etc. You can add custom screens too if you want, but I always make my own seperate file for these.

Open Project - this just opens all of those files at once in the code editor. Super handy if you make extra files like I do for certain things.

Actions

last but not least, our actions.

Navigate Script - This feature is underrated in my honest opinion, it's super handy for help debugging! In renpy you can comment with # before a line. However, if you do #TODO and type something after it, it saves it as a note! You can view these TODO's here as well as easily navigate to when certain screens are called, where different labels are (super great if your game is long, and more. It saves some scrolling.

Check Script (Lint) - also super duper handy for debugging some basic things. It also tells you your word count! But its handy for letting you know about some errors that might throw up. I like using it to look for sprites I may or may not have mispelled, because they show up in there too.

Change/Update GUI - Nifty, though once you start customizing GUI on your own, it isn't as useful. You can reset the project at any point and regenerate the image files here. This updates all those defaults we talked about earlier.

Delete Persistent - this just helps you delete any persistent data between play throughs on your end. I like to use it when making a lot of changes while testing the game, so that I can reboot the game fresh.

Force Recompile - Full disclosure, as many games as I've made and as long as I've been using Renpy, i have never used this feature. I searched to see what it does and this is the general consesus: Normally renpy tries to be smart about compiling code (creating .rpyc files) and only compiles .rpy files with changes. This is to speed up the process since compiling takes time. Sometimes you can make changes that renpy don't pick up on and therefore won't recompile. In these cases you can run force recompile to force it. Another solution (if you know what file is affected) is to delete that specific. rpyc file.

The rest of your options on this right hand side are how you make executable builds for your game that people can download to extract and play later!

Sorry gang! that was a whole lot of text obviously the last button "Launch Project" launches an uncompiled version of the project for you to play and test as you go! Hang in tight because my next post is about how to utilize github for renpy, so you can collaborate easier!

[josendlessmonolouge]

Lazy stay at home days with heroes of Olympus boys headcanons

frank, Leo, Jason, Percy

Frank:

i think he probably has some post traumatic arthritis from all the injuries he sustained in the war (just like me frr except I wasn’t saving the world I was just weak) so while he usually likes to be active maybe go for a long run in the morning or go on a hike with you, some days he aches too much to do the active sort of date he prefers. He feels guilty if he spends a day not actively being productive or working out so I think these are probably the only lazy at home days he gets. I think likes to spend days at home days watching sports, or nature documentaries (getting new ideas of what he can transform into) while cuddling. He peppers lots of his own fun facts and dry humor in though. he’s not the best at cooking, as his grandma never cooked, they had a maid who cooked for the family. However, every now and then his mom would bake with him. but he still loves to cook with you. I think he likes to play chess, checkers, and other two person strategy games. Finish the day off with breakfast for dinner. Probably waffles with lots of fruit with some bacon or ham.

leo:

Leo’s ideal stay at home day with his partner? Probably playing Mario cart or Mario party. You, Him, A bowl of guac, an entire bag of tortilla chips. Sitting on the floor playing video games or building legos.. oh man he’d have every Star Wars Lego set. He’s in heaven. I think he lets you play with his hair too. He’s definitely a little spoon/sit on your lap/ lean on you not the other way around. he’s very skinny and pretty bony likely more so than you and doesn’t want you to be uncomfortable. Finish the day off with a fire in the backyard maybe some roasted hotdogs some 80s rock-n-roll CDs playing. I think he’d dance with you, not well at all but he’d try and you would just eat it up. Maybe watch some classic Mexican movies while y’all fall asleep- he’d like that. Tbh I think he just loves 80s comedies.

Jason:

Jason is like Frank in that he struggles to have a day to wind down without feeling guilty. You have to force him to just chill out for a day man. Even so I think his ideal day is pretty structured. Wake up at 6am, make breakfast trying his best not to wake you up too. I feel like Jason loves him some steak and eggs for breakfast, bro was raised by wolves, he also can’t cook that many things… but he tries to make you something too. I think his love language is acts of service, so he makes you pancakes or a smoothie or just something simple that he knows is going to taste good. He wants to workout or train so bad but he knows it’s good for his muscles to have a day off plus he can spend it with his amazing partner. Honestly what he’d like most is doing your hobbies with you. I think he just likes to see you smile.

Percy: Percy needs a day off bro and he knows it. Percy’s idea of fun? Build a pillow fort in the kitchen with a Blue blanket (bare with me), fish patterned blanket on the floor. Man makes the cozy pillow version of the tunnel room in an aquarium. Don’t tell me he doesn’t have one of them y2k fish lamps. He and and you hang out there for the whole day him probably with a shark stuffie in his lap. I think because Poseidon is his father he’s really good at doing sailor’s knots and tying nets, therefore meaning he’s good at macramé and friendship bracelets so I think he’s like to make bracelets with you. Maybe watch some Jeremy wade or romcoms on a lap top. Play some board games. Listen to an audio book while curled up together. Just a nice slow paced day is all he needs

[foone]

My one bit of advice I think every gamer should hear:

GO PLAY OUTER WILDS.

Seriously. It is easily one of my top 5 games of all time, and that's mainly because I'm being cagey about if it's the #1, because it probably is.

It's a game where you're a little alien who is taking their first flight into space, in their little spaceship. You go to space and find a mystery, and have to figure it out.

It's a game entirely about learning things about the world you're in: it's a tiny solar system modeled amazingly well, with varied planetary environments, archaeology, and quantum fun.

It's a game that's hard to talk about without spoiling, because it's about solving the mysteries. There used to be some other aliens here, they're long gone. What happened to them? Their whole society was built around trying to find something: what was it? Did they find it? And there's a weird disastrous event that keeps happening, why? Can you stop it? Should you stop it? Is it connected to the other weird things that keep happening? What happened to that ice planet that exploded with vines? One of the astronauts who came before you was the best pilot who ever lived, but they vanished. What happened to them? And why can you sometimes hear their harmonica over the radio when you point it at your own planet?

The game is wonderful and non-linear and the most unique approach to a Metroidvania I've seen years: it's basically "what if we did the Metroidvania idea but with no items or power ups? What if the thing that you got to unlock new areas WAS INSIDE THE PLAYER'S HEAD?"

Because you don't unlock the next area by picking up the high-jump boots, you unlock it by learning something new. Now you can do something you didn't realize you could before, but now you know you can.

And that's only one of the amazing concepts they stuffed in this game. The itemless Metroidvania, the tiny simulated solar system, the quantum mechanics... Each of these alone could be enough to carry an indie game. They stuffed them all in one game combined with a great story, and that's in a gamewith relatively little dialogue!

There's like a dozen people to talk to, but you spent a lot of time reading conversations left by the long-gone aliens. You get to know them, what they were working for, how they interacted, and what happened to them, thousands of years later. It's less the bioshock style audio-logs, and more like going over bits of ancient writing, making connections and correlations from the fragments you can find.

And don't get me wrong, this might sound like this game is going to be dry and boring: it is so very not. It is a game about mysteries in the void of space, the death of a civilization, and the potentially world-ending dangers that face a living one, and even bigger concepts. It could so easily be a cosmic horror, about the cold death of space and the universe itself, and the nihilism of realizing that even a race that could cross the gap between the stars and bend spacetime to their will... They too died out. If they couldn't make it, what hope do you have, in your little spaceship that's primarily made of WOOD?

And yet... The game is always engaging. It has a few scares, and space is never a safe place to be, but it maintains a sense of humor and wonder. Yes, the universe can be scary, but it's also amazing. And you're just a little salamander-guy who wants to see it all, and figure out all the things. Maybe you don't know something yet, but tomorrow is a new day, and you can go blasting off to another planet, find some writing in a city suspended upside down over a black hole, try to fly into the core of a water planet, dodge giant anglerfish inside the warped space of an exploded planet, and try to explore an ancient city that's slowly filling with sand. It is a game about Things Ending, and it refuses to give into despair. It is one of the most relentlessly optimistic games I have ever played.

And the experience of playing it is so unique. This isn't a game where you could watch a letsplay and only get spoiled on some plot points, it's a game where the fundamental gameplay loop is about learning things. You should try it for yourself. It's got hints and many different avenues to explore (and it even keeps track of them for you, in case you forget!), so you don't have to worry much about getting stuck for too long. You can always put aside a "puzzle" and come back later, after you've learned more. (I put puzzle in quotes because it's not exactly a puzzle game. It's more of a mystery game. You aren't solving a logic puzzle or putting the pegs into the right holes, you're asking "Why is this like this? Where does this go? What is this for?" and then figuring that out from clues)

It's like 25$ on steam, and you can get it for Playstation and Xboxes as well (sadly no Switch version. They were working on one but it seems that version has stalled, with no announced release date)

You can probably get it for like 10$ if you're patient and wait for a sale.

One final note: there's also a DLC. The DLC is fully self-contained, in that you won't miss anything playing the main game without it. It basically adds a huge side-area to the game which goes and fills in some gaps in the history, explains some things, and introduces some more variety to the Outer Wilds universe.

It's utterly amazing, too. It's basically Outer Wilds 2 in everything but name, but it's totally fine to just grab the base game and play that. You can always come back and grab the DLC later if you want more Outer Wilds.

Seriously. To sum up, Outer Wilds is one of the greatest games ever made, it won a ton of awards, and it should have won more. They should invent more gaming awards just to give to Outer Wilds. This is one of the games that is going to be talked about in future "history of gaming" classes and put on lists of the 50 most groundbreaking and influential games, alongside things like Myst and King's Quest and Zork and Mass Effect. It's just that good, that groundbreaking.

[talenlee]

Game Pile: Kentucky Route 0, One of Three Games About America

Script and Thumbnail below the fold!

Kentucky Route Zero is a magical realist point and click game of what I’d normally call Narrative Adventure, which came to kickstarter in 2011, then came out in 2013, 2014, 2016, and 2020, because you can’t have nothing for free, even things you pay for. The game is a text-driven game without any of the trappings of your typical point-and-clicker where you jam a ladder in your pants and try to work out why you want to put green dye in the water fountain. Instead it follows the haunted mind of Conway, a trucky driver and his interactions with small handful of people on a part of the Kentucky Interstate, while he to find the place he needs to do his delivery, despite being utterly lost.

I enjoyed what of Kentucky Route Zero I played, but the thing that stands out to me in hindsight is its sound design. It’s a beautifully defined game, audio-wise, with all sorts of thoughtful foley for its environments, and the way that even the pieces of the interface that Conway interacts with have their own sort of specific authentic sounds, chonks and thunks and ch-zzzzses.

It’s also visually splendid, beautiful in what it tries to represent in the heightened reality of its setting but also the format of a videogame. These places look good from the angle that’s chosen, creating lines of artwork and bars of cages, depending on what you’re focusing on, and by being a fixed-camera story of its type, Kentucky Route Zero takes on traits of theatre, with blocking and careful positioning and timing all making up part of how the story unfolds.

A story I haven’t finished.

See, I don’t feel like playing Kentucky Route Zero Act V.

Sit down, traveller. Let me tell you a story.

There’s a chance you’ve heard this story before. I’ve anonymised it here, not because I think you shouldn’t be able to work out who it is, but because the idea of focusing on the who runs the risk of ignoring the what. Plus, I don’t want to direct anyone to a person who said something stupid and encourage fights. That’s not the important issue.

This is the story of when someone perfectly represented something, and probably never realised it.

You will sometimes hear me talk about the take that ‘there are three games about America,’ with a tone of utter revulsion and derision. This is from an incident back in 2020, when a game developer and advocate for inclusive games, had an opinion, on the internet. This advocate is well-established and has a big audience, but also, he’s crucially, not a white guy, not a Christian guy, and not an American guy. These are factors that play into what he said, which was, in summary, that while Kentucky Route 0 was no doubt phenomenal, he wasn’t interested in playing it right now.

To this, an actual adult responded with:

This is legitimately the worst take you’ve ever had. There are only about three games that are actually American, and this is one of them. Everything else is designed for export. Kr0 is a precious and valuable thing. It is of immense and intense personal importance.

Now, resisting the urge to argue with a tweet, which is just generally a bad practice that leads to doing things like wanting to be on twitter, and setting aside this tweet conflating ‘this is of personal importance to me’ and ‘this should be of importance to you,’ this position describes the idea that there are only three games that are ‘actually American.’

What does it mean to be ‘actually American?’

America is a pretty pervasive presence, if you’re not aware of it. Most people in the world have to know about what’s going on in America. We know about your Presidents and your Senators and your Constitution, to the point where people can be more aware of how your country’s laws work than their own country’s laws. I’ve often seen it held up as an example of how poorly educated people in say, Canada and Australia are that we believe we have, say, a ‘first amendment right,’ but the thing is you have to ask why there is that.

We watch so much American TV.

We listen to American music.

We try to make our news broadcasts look like yours, because that’s what real and legitimate news looks like. We try to retell your stories in our local languages because that’s what real media looks like. Our children sing songs in your accents because that’s the culture that a multi-trillion dollar economy has pumped into the whole world.

America demands we attend their wars and surrender our living to become their dead and when we are done America sells the survivors a cheeseburger.

This is not a remarkable or controversial statement. You must know, this is not even vaguely challenging to know about. Everywhere in the world is replicating parts of the American empire, because America exports and enforces the vision of the American empire. McDonalds may sell curry in India, but it’s very important that the curry being sold is McDonalds curry because that is how you know it’s an American style curry.

What this means is when someone tries to assert there are only really three games about America, that’s a kind of specialised brain rot that requires you to consider games that are very much about America as not being really about America. And thus we see the other thing about America, which is it’s not enough for America to be the most important place in the world that everyone else in the world needs to recognise, but also, most of America is inadequately America for this vision of America. You saw this in the wake of 9/11, and the election of Barack Obama: huge amounts of American media resurged in extolling the values of ‘real’ America, as opposed to the parts of America where the vast majority of Americans lived, which just so happened to paint a lot of marginalised people living in the cities as ‘fake Americans.’

I am not bringing you unique information. This is just obviously true things if you don’t live within the boundaries of an environment that flatters you as the most normal thing in the world. The vast majority of the world is not America. There are eight billion people in the world, more or less, meaning that America is about 4% of the world, and yet, it is catastrophically, overwhelmingly, deleritously the common touchstone for how things are ‘supposed’ to work. This is through media imperialism, which is mostly supported by American companies exporting all their media to foreign markets extremely cheaply.

‘about three games that are actually American.’

This fascinating piece of doofusry still, even now leaves me agog. ‘Actually American.’ Kentucky Route 0 is actually American, you see, as opposed to… what? Is America’s Army one of them? You know, the game financed by the American Army? What about Call of Duty, a franchise that is in part subsidised by American military complex manufacturers? What about Grand Theft Auto, a videogame that tells the rags-to-riches story of American excess in criminality, setting aside the way it’s made by a Scottish company. Actually American, because American doesn’t mean America, it means one tiny little pool of ‘America’ where the speaker can imagine there’s a realness and an authenticity to the America-ness that doesn’t involve all the messy realities of what it is to be America. It’s the towns of hard-working people, that suffer under your particular description of oppression, whether that’s cities full of nonwhite people or corporations bleeding the country dry, always eliding the social cruelties and terribleness of these places, as if giving people money stops them from being bigoted (for example).

This is then used to recruit these poor, superior Americans, the you know, America Americans, whose sufferings are noble and whose authenticity cannot be impeached and they are then used as a defense against criticism of, you know, America. It’s the same speech Charlie Daniels gave about how foreigners may think they could push around Barack Obama (a dude who bombed a lot of shepherds with the most elaborate and brutal military ordinance in the world) but they were going to have a harder time taking on Americans who wrestled alligators, who at this point have exactly zero recorded drone strike kills.

This is because America America isn’t real.

‘Real’ America is a nebulous nothing that you can project whatever you want onto, and which is also not responsible for anything terrible that America does. It’s not the American Empire, it’s not the exporter of culture, it’s somehow purer, better, a sort of individualised folk who are to be protected and extolled, shriven of all the things about America that make it anything but its perfect idealised form of America.

I could go on.

I really could.

This is something that defines the world I have to live in. I speak English. I’m white. I’m from a coloniser state. I should be able to integrate easily and smoothly into the white supremacist capitalist hierarchy of American culture, but we are told, that no, we are not acceptable. We are only valid as long as our differences are invisible. We, a real people, do not get to have opinions on America, because we do not know True America. When you spell colour wrong in a chat message, when your accent isn’t quite right, when you don’t know the difference between junior and sophomore year of high school, then you are shown, you are evinced, and you are made very aware that you are other, you are outside, you are wrong.

And really, there’s no good reason for it. We send our soldiers to America’s wars, we buy America’s submarines, and we sing your songs. Our currency mimics America’s, our culture permeats with America’s, we even have such a crushing inferiority complex about the empire that there’s an academic term for what we feel about our own media compared to the media of the truer, proper empire to which we are vassal.

The term is ‘cultural cringe,’ and it was coined by Henry Lawson, who you, odds on, have never heard of. In 1894, he wrote:

The Australian writer, until he gets a “London hearing,” is only accepted as an imitator of some recognized English or American author; and, as soon as he shows signs of coming to the front, he is labelled “The Australian Southey,” “The Australian Burns,” or “The Australian Bret Harte,” and lately, “The Australian Kipling.” Thus no matter how original he may be, he is branded, at the very start, as a plagiarist, and by his own country, which thinks, no doubt, that it is paying him a compliment and encouraging him, while it is really doing him a cruel and an almost irreparable injury. But mark! As soon as the Southern writer goes “home” and gets some recognition in England, he is “So-and-So, the well-known Australian author whose work has attracted so much attention in London lately”; and we first hear of him by cable, even though he might have been writing at his best for ten years in Australia.

This is imperialism. This is a way in which we have been induced and brought by the empires around us to accept their ways as correct, as the normal, as default. And that is the mindset you must have if you want to look at the breadth of videogames, with their American ideas like health insurance, readily available guns, the importance of freedom, the ubiquity of air travel, the branding and iconography of types of food and the sports metaphors and then say ‘yeah, this doesn’t have anything to do with America, not really.’

Anyway, this thread, this incident, was a big deal at the time, in that there were a lot of people from within the community of game developers and journalists who seemed very happy to line up and get mad at a brown foreigner for being inadequately enthusiastic about the possibility of playing a videogame. But don’t worry, after a day or two, an apology was forthcoming for all of this fracas, by which I mean, the original developer apologised for being so thoughtless as to, again, express honest lack of enthusiasm in a videogame.

For me, this was a kind of break point, where I started just blocking indie devs on sight. I don’t want to know what they’re involved in, I don’t want to promote their work, and I will hold tiny grudges against them that I do not seek to transfer or encourage in others. This was one silly incident in which a lot of people said something silly because they don’t know better, or they’re arseholes.

None of this is fair to Kentucky Route 0. It’s a game with its own intentions and its own perspective. It’s not trying to make this conversation happen. Kentucky Route 0 has been choked and gripped by this position around it, where to talk about an American game, someone put a cross on it that made it the avatar for All Things America. The wild thing to me is that I had, prior to this point, played two episodes of Kentucky Route 0. I thought it was pretty good, and I liked what it did with the negative space of dialogue options – when a character you’re controlling makes excuses, the excuses you choose show you other things you could be making excuses about that you, the player, didn’t know beforehand. That’s some good Narrative Storytelling Design, I like that a lot. But now I can’t really engage with Kentucky Route Zero because the main thing it makes me think about is how this final chapter, meant to round out the game’s story and present a conclusion and a point, became this flashpoint for a lot of people to be very casually racist.

Which kinda poisons the whole thing for me. It’s an authentic thing, I’m sure, it’s a thoughtful thing, too, but the people stepping up to say I should care about it did so in a way that made me hate them.

Any time you see me say ‘three games about America’ I’m talking about this, and the attitude of a particular kind of American that America is, as always, exceptional. It’s real easy to not realise when you’re just voicing your self-centeredness and how easy that is to ignore the opinions of people around you and what they’re saying. This is what I’m talking about when I mention ‘the three games about America.’

[fade for credit text]

By the way, the three games about America are Crash Bandicoot, Sam & Max Hit The Road, and Bust A Move.

[corporatefrog]

꒦‧₊ ꒷ HEADCANNONS: Going on a Road Trip with Kyle, Kenny, Stan, and Butters (Separately) ✧.*

✧.* tags: college au, road trips, ✧.* Charactions: kyle broflovski, stan marsh, kenny mccormick, butters scotch a/n: I drove home to visit family this weekend and the 5 hours drive always drags. so i made up driving buddies to pass the time lol masterlist

Kyle

He definitely drives. Not because he prefers driving but because he refuses the thought of someone else being in control of the car that isn’t his mom (sheila is def a crazy driver but he’s desensitized)

He’s a good driver though. ALWAYS uses a turn signal, even if there isn’t a car behind you

“Kyle we haven’t seen anyone for 20 minutes, why are you using your blinker to change lanes”

“Well i thought i saw headlights in my rearview”

“That’s the stoplight we just passed-”

I feel like he’d love a good road trip. Airports are too stressful and driving means you can chit chat and get actual food and not hear a baby screaming for 3 hours

PODCAST LISTENER

He’s got at least 5 episodes downloaded depending on the genre you want

Like listening to commentary or informative podcasts so you guys can talk about them together

“So I downloaded a podcast about the history of Jeoprady and a few episodes of a JK Rowling audio- documentary- thing.”

“Have I told you that you are the best person ever” 

“Yeah, but you could tell me again”

Kenny

LOVES ROAD TRIPS!

Blasting music! Head out the window! Going 85 on a 55 back road! Let him in the car!

Prefers to be a passenger so he can be silly without risking the car crashing

He always has to stop for snacks at the beginning so you can munch on the way (and because gas station snacks are the absolute best) 

“Corn nuts?”

“Check”

“Bugles?”

“Check”

“Muddie Buddies?”

“Double check”

He’s got a mega playlist full of both of your favorite car jams that he updates regularly 

Definitely a ton of Black Eyed Peas

And some tyler the creator too probably

If you’re going on a longer trip, he is OUT after 4 hours

Absolutely drooling, head turned to a weird angle that’ll give him a huge crick in the neck once he’s up, but god DAMN is a restful

He’s up in 45 minutes and ready to party some more

If you’re driving through the night, he likes to stop and pull to the side of the road so you can look at the stars

And so he can piss

Stan

Give him aux or he will cry

Whereas kenny knows the difference between car vibe music and home vibe music, stan does not

Bro definitely put every fall out boy song EVER on there

Which like, you’re not complaining. 

He probably likes to switch drivers every few hours so you both can take a break and enjoy the drive.

He prefers being the passenger though, he likes staring out the window and unfocusing his eyes so everything blurs together

Probably enjoys flights a bit more honestly

“I mean, it’s like 2 hours and you’re there!”

“2 hours + 1 for getting to the airport + 2 for getting through security + 1 for waiting to board + 1 for landing” 

“Yeah and??? You don’t have to drive??”

Randy probably had a shit ton of frequent flier miles for some reasons so the marshs were a flying family for sure. 

Butters

Passenger princess.

Give him a blanket PLEASE

Whenever you stop for gas, he finds the BEST trinkets

“Look at this air freshener I found! It smells like honeysuckle! Can we put it in the car for the rest of the drive?” 

Likes to having music playing low so it’s just in the background while you guys talk

Definitely brings mad libs

“Okay can i have an adjective”

“Uh,,, Smelly >:)”

Bro starts GIGGLING 

He’d like to go on the drive just to play road trip games with you

Doesn’t know how pumping gas works

“YN!! You have to stop the gas!”

“What do you mean butters, the tank isn’t full”

“But it’ll overflow if you just let it keep going!”

“What-”

The sweetest driving buddy ever

[thevoidisback]

Let me be clear for ya'll out there real quick cuz ya'll need to know smh about me

will do

Asked questions

Rp so put /rp in your ask

QnA any time make sure to put *📝* in there

Smh funny to put a smile on you!

will NOT do

Nsfw 🔞

Proshipping bc that's just wrong

Not talk about my irl self do to insecurity so that will be a red flag

Don't force me to do things I don't like

I will delete your ask if I don't like it

I'll redesign your oc if you pay $10 on cash app so DM me for that because I ain't gonna do it for free!

Please do respect my opinions on what I tell you on my thoughts of your ask because if you don't like then leave

Don't ask for a face reveal it's uncomfortable...same for the age I don't feel comfortable with telling

Don't try any dumbass shit and I mean that literally

About Narrator!

She is literally my self prisona of me so of course she has adhd and autism and will probably procrastinate some times because that's how I am most likely....Womp womp I know it sounds lazy of me but bare with me here

I do love candy and chocolate! Personality I enjoy red velvet cupcakes because it's just chocolate dyed red lmao

I do some voice acting for Narrator w/ my irl friends and she honestly loves it because N.V aka Narrator void or just Narrator is actually a UK oc although in irl I was born in Louisiana then move to New Boston so Narrator has a British voice so remember that when she answers your questions

Narrator has control over Void and Silly void but she doesn't really bothers because she wants them to enjoy their void lives however they please

Do remember I have other oc's but I don't pay attention to them unless you ask who are they and I'll show you all of them!

Remember if you have any sad or just feeling down DM because I am a very caring person who will listen but if you want I can do my best to comfort you in any way

I do not have discord no more because I've done a lot of unresponsible things and got in trouble twice bc I let somebody "rp" with me and I fell for two different people and now I'm very uncomfortable that I let it happen without realizing it so I will never again plan to reinstall discord very sorry but not really

I'm very mature so I can handle g0r3, d3∆th, b1o0d, s3lf h∆rm, all that weird or crazy shit but I don't really support any of this type of act in irl so don't do it for content just go to a therapist about it now if it's nsfw or something else I can handle it but I still don't support actually doing it because there are kids on some social platforms plus the nsfw thing is just apart of humanity we can't control the internet so remember that

I dislike Gen Alpha kids it's just I personally think they are annoying af and hard to talk to without having to hear them say/text "skipitbi Gaytt rizz" type shit so you will be blocked immediately by me without no hesitation and if you don't understand why is because I'm a Gen Z girl because I was born in the 2000's when growing up so I'm some what brain rotten but not completely so remember that please and thank you!

I have a lot of different types of music I like listening to as in some: silly, random edit audio TikTok songs, Phonk songs, songs that just hit different, meme related songs, jazz/lofi because it helps me sleep at nights, Fnf songs- just a lot to keep up with

What fandoms I like?

I'll gladly tell ya!!

Fundamental paper education school

Poppy play time!

Lmk!

Pressure (roblox)

Doors (roblox)

Block tales (roblox)

Gacha life/ Gacha club

Sky children of the light

Cult of the lamb (just because of that damn black ram they are just too cute don't blame me!!)

Hellva boss and Hazbin hotel

Dandy's world (cuz I keep seeing this shit everywhere and yes I've seen the game play but I didn't play it myself so stfu!)

Phighting (yes I'm very much aware of this game on roblox and yes I gave it a try with my friend it was fun and I like it wish my computer didn't crash on it womp womp!)

Cookie run kingdom

Regretevator

Friday night funky

Five nights at Freddy

More coming soon if I fine fandoms I like any time soon

Who I am close with?

@unknownartistsmf

-> @out-of-nowhere231 <-

((she doesn't post much but I suggest you look her up...she doesn't have any asked questions also the same do and don't do apply to her as well))

@sam-the-tomboy

That's who I fully trust online sorry @babyevenfromgovacation but idk 'bout you nothing personal just don't fully trust you is all...

Thank you for reading all this! I had to rethink about everything but I do still love ya'll even though I don't know ya'll but stay cool!

Side note: I don't give a fuck how old you are just be honest with me and if your uncomfortable with it then I understand but still just let me know thank you!

This User loves Halloween!

I don't have TikTok because of the dark truth about it so sorry if ya followed me there and yes I do still have roblox but I suggest you just follow my user that way if I'm online you can join faster with me and my friends

Roblox user: Moaldr1278

[copperbadge]

[ID: Two line graphs from the ADHD phone app EndeavorOTC, showing my "focus score" over time. The first graphic shows me starting on October 7th with a score of 36, which rises steadily to a score of 59 on October 20th. The second shows my latest scores, from November 14th to today, December 5th, showing several scores of 63 and 64 but nothing higher.]

It really has been hard to know whether EndeavorOTC is having a solid impact on my focus, or whether it would be lasting if I stopped playing. The initial spike to 59 is nice but also it's in keeping with a skills improvement as you just...learn to play a video game. Since October 23, my scores have been between 61 and 64, and while that does include a recommended a two-week break, it's still a little frustrating not to be able to crack 65, to see such a visible plateau basically "since getting good at the game".

Skills plateaus are natural and I know that, so I'm not necessarily disappointed or disillusioned. As a metric, the Focus Score really just measures how good you are at hitting goals in the game; because ADHD is perception-based it's also tough to measure, outside of the game, if I'm more focused, have better executive function, etc. Especially since the company can be vague about what "improvements" we're meant to see. Which I also understand -- specificity would drive a placebo effect in addition to frustrating people who aren't mapping onto their specific trajectory. But it's still a struggle.

I don't need my headphones as often in public, or audio in general for tasks as often (I did the dishes the other day without a podcast for the first time in probably a solid decade) but that could also be medication, or just...getting older and more tolerant. I think I'm socially more inhibited, which I should note is a good thing -- I'm less likely to interrupt or backtrack to previous conversations or accidentally dominate a conversation. But again, I don't know exactly where that's coming from.

I keep telling myself I already paid for the year so I shouldn't really try to seriously assess any of this until I've been "treating" with the game for a year, which will be another four six-week treatments after this one. That does take some pressure off because the game's already paid for through October and it's only 25 minutes a day, so whether it works or not I might as well keep going.

But patience is something I am still learning, it appears. :D

[horny-p0et]

incelbur blurb part three

another one. don't need an intro at this point you know what this is. although i saw lovejoy live recently and am pretty happy about it. you have probably seen the photos i took shared around already by my friends lol but you'll never know its me ;)

things are getting weird and gross in this series now, heads up.

part one + part two

warnings: masturbation, nonconsensual phone sex and filming, sexist language and attitudes, alcohol abuse.

wordcount: 1567

dont like, dni. please just block me and move on.

────୨ৎ────

INCELBUR who's hands were shaking when he sent the first message to your discord. typing the word 'hey' had never been so hard before. he keeps checking to see if you've responded, its the weekend- you shouldn't be that busy... he finds himself filled with regret and disgust, why did he start talking to you again? you're just some girl, nothing worthwhile anyway. you were probably busy sucking some guys cock-

"heyy! sorry i was studying so i didn't have notifications on. did u wanna game sometime today?"

"yeah that would be cool. what did you wanna play?"

INCELBUR who was caught off guard when you suggest to play fortnite duos, he didn't think girls liked games with guns. he's even more surprised when you drop into the game and he finds out you've been playing for years and are honestly better than him at the game. it pisses him off, he wanted to impress you with his skills and now you're having to revive him every round. it's emasculating, he hates feeling like he's useless.

INCELBUR who almost ended the call because of how frustrated the game was making him until you cheer when he gets a kill, and praise him when he does well. your soft voice in his ear is like the best sort of asmr, it sends shivers up his spine when you say 'you're doing so good', he can imagine you whining that while he pounds your pussy.

INCELBUR who couldn't believe three hours had gone by and you're suddenly telling him you're ready to hop off for the night. he wants to beg for you to stay, just one more game, but he doesn't want to sound needy. he isn't a simp, after all. you tell him you'll be on tomorrow and he tells you he'll be there. of course he would, he's always on his computer.

INCELBUR who has to jerk off after the call is over, he'd been hard for most of the conversation already and it was aching by that point. he didn't tell you he'd been recording while you gamed together, he will go back through the video later and clip every time you groan in frustration or squeal in excitement into an audio just for him. the thought of his depravity has him shooting ropes onto his hand within minutes, he didn't even have time to open the photos of you on his phone.

INCELBUR who feels like he's drifting aimlessly until you guys talk again, the sporadic text conversations aren't cutting it. he needs more, he needs your touch, to smell you again. when you see him at school you greet him with a smile, even when your friends give him weird looks you look at him like he's human. it makes him feel alive, important, like he only exists under your gaze.

INCELBUR who has been talking to you for about two weeks, he's never talked to a girl this long before without her running away. it's not his fault, he asks them for nudes and suddenly he's a 'creep' and a 'pervert'. if they didn't want him that way why did they bother talking to him anyway? but you're different. he can't mess this up, even if talking to you is blissful torture because all he wants to do is shove his tongue in your pretty mouth.

INCELBUR who can't help himself but touch his cock while you're on voice call together, it started with him just rubbing himself through his pants and before long he'd have his hand wrapped around himself as you ramble about something. he knows it's wrong, its some fucked up exhibitionist shit, but you are too good to resist. he can't help himself- if your voice wasn't so hot. it's your fault not his.

"god, my course work is killing me recently. i feel like i get no free time anymore, i know it's important but sometimes i just wanna dropout and forget about university. do you know what i mean?"

"... what? oh, yeah... it's.. really hard.."

INCELBUR who gets angrier when he see's you hanging out with guys now that you guys are friends. he's possessive, he wants your attention on him and no one else. seeing you out at clubs on social media is brutal, he wants to demand you stay home and game with him instead. or better yet, come to his place and ride his cock while he bites your neck. he loves the idea of covering you with marks, then everyone would know you belong to him and him alone.

INCELBUR who cringes when you talk about boys on your voice chats. you guys were just playing minecraft and suddenly you're complaining about some chad you're seeing. you sound so stupid in his eyes, of course guys like that are going to treat you badly. they aren't nice guys like him. he's bitter and spiteful, you would be happy if you weren't so blind to the ideal male specimen right in front of you.

INCELBUR who calls you at an obscene time in the middle of the night while he's wanking. he's so close, he just needs your help getting over that edge. you mumble his name in a groggy voice, he'd woken you up and he doesn't care, that single word sends him spiralling and he's stained his sheets with his seed. you ask him if he needs anything and he apologises and tells you its a buttdial and abruptly hangs up.

INCELBUR who should feel guilty about using your kindness to his benefit, but he wouldn't have to if you'd notice how much he wanted you. he showers for you, he buys you skins in game, he walks you to classes he doesn't share with you just to get an extra few minutes around you. he knows your friends don't like him, they think he's a loser. but you defend him every time, he knows you love him- you must just be too shy to tell him.

INCELBUR who sees you at a bar one night and decides to 'accidently' run into you there. maybe if you're drunk you will let loose and dance with him. or even better, drag him into the bathroom for a quickie. the idea has him hard as a rock as he struggles to put on his skinny jeans. he sprays too much deodorant and cologne on, sprays some product he doesn't know how to use into his curls and splashes water on his face until his acne has flared up noticeably.

INCLEBUR who hates being in public. he feels like everyone is staring at him and thinking about how ugly he is, this bar feels like it's been turned up to eleven. he sticks out like a sore thumb because of his height and skinny build, he almost turns around and goes home until he sees you at the bar. alone. perfect.

"oh, y/n... didn't expect to run into you here. what are the chances?"

"oh my god, wilbur! what the fuck are you doing out of the house?"

"buying you a drink, hopefully."

INCELBUR who can smell the alcohol on your breath and see the way your lipstick is smudged, who the fuck have you been kissing? he considered asking so he could deck the guy but decides against it. you're smiling at him and it makes him docile, you could get him to do anything if you asked. it makes him feel pathetic, a love sick fool, but he can't ignore those feelings.

INCELBUR who buys you a drink just like he said he would, even when you protest and tell him he doesn't need to. you need to see him as a gentleman, a man who can provide for you. a good man, a great boyfriend too. your arm keeps touching his as you lean against the bar, it sends shockwaves straight to his dick and he's confident if you looked down you could see the outline of his boner through the denim.

INCELBUR who leans in you kiss you and you turn away, his lips finding your cheek instead. you tell him you aren't interested in him like that, he's sweet, but he's just a friend. you tell him to take it slow, that you like having him around and he means a lot to you. just not in the way he likes you, he thinks bitterly. he feels like crying, he's humiliated. he considered grabbing you by the back of the head and making you kiss him anyway, maybe if you felt his lips on yours you'd realise how amazing he was. but he decides against hit, the last thing he wants is to make you hate him. he hates himself enough already.

INCELBUR who leaves a few minutes after that, he can't stand the shame he feels because of his transgression. of course you don't love him, who could love a freak like him? he's ugly, he has no future, he's never even kissed anyone before. he shouts at a random couple he passes on the way home, telling the man his girl is a whore who will just break his heart. he punches a tree on a quiet street until his knuckles bleed and he stumbles into a bottle shop to grab some vodka. he's finished half the bottle before he's made it home, stumbling and crying.

[planet-dusk]

Any thoughts about Dom jisung😵‍💫

i'm team sub/switch jisung most of the time but here are some thoughts on dom!jisung...

🏷️ dom!jisung, bdsm (gagging, restraints, impact play etc), toy use, porn mention, filming, messy sex, spit kink, free use, mention of sharing mc, double penetration, (anal) gaping, piss kink, anal, too much to add rlly but these are the main warnings i think

i feel like jisung would be between a hard and a soft dom even though he doesn't lean too extreme. why? i think he craves control (whether he's domming or subbing). he would surprise you with how strict he is.

a little sadistic but nothing outrageous in terms of impact and pain play (mostly spanking and nipple play)

i think he'd have less patience for edging and would be more into overstimulation. also forced orgasms

which works both ways: orders you to keep riding him or sucking him off even after he's already cummed multiple times

brat tamer: it takes a brat to tame one. he will out-brat you.

DIRTY TALK. so much of it. he'd run his mouth constantly. praise, degradation, all of it.

very cocky at times but also likes to joke around

yes, doms need praise too! like, literally. tell him how good he makes you feel. thank him for what he does to you.

filthy messy sex: lots of drool, cum and lube

has a spit kink

loves to gag you and watch you drool

loves face/throatfucking for the same reason

(more under the cut cuz this was getting too long)

prefers fucking you raw so he can creampie you (multiple times)

lots of toys! vibrators, dildos, couple stuff, and so on... probably has a thing for weirdly shaped and brightly coloured dildos. he loves the sight of a bright purple glass tentacle in your pussy <33

even more so if said toys make you squirt

is open to letting you use toys on him such as anal plugs and fleshlights

fan of anal sex in general, including double penetration. enjoys fucking you while you're wearing a plug or vibrator in your ass

possibly into (anal) gaping/stretching + double vaginal penetration with toys or his cock and a toy

loves titfucking esp cumming on your tits

so much oral. both giving and receiving

likes to watch porn together with you

also likes to create porn together; videos, pictures, anything

wants you to send him regular updates during the day in the form of texts, voice messages, pictures and videos

sends a lot of audio messages + videos of himself masturbating

doesn't mind sharing the footage and enjoys watching a few of his close friends fuck you. again raw of course because he loooves seeing you all filled up with cum

knows you love his voice and uses it to his advantage. will order you to cum or do a countdown

would likely be into free use but more in a passive role (you giving him a handjob or blowjob rather than him fucking you)

i can see him enjoying sexual card and board games

potentially into roleplay esp teacher/student dynamics

enjoys some bondage and sensory deprivation but again nothing too extreme. mostly cuffs, ropes, blindfolds and the aforementioned (ball) gags. gets more of a kick out of controlling you and disciplining you without restraints

may have a piss kink esp when it comes to bladder control. lowkey entertains the thought of him fucking you until you can't hold back anymore and leak all over him

likes it when you choke him and often orders you to do so right before he cums

prefers short, light sessions over longer ones

having fun (both of you) is the most important thing to him!

[nephilimcursed]

Bella's Route: Haunted Dark Bridal (G-Edition) - Prologue Part One

The game loads strangely, with slight distortion to your screen. You are no longer... playing as Yui. How strange, instead there is a dark haired girl with peircing, warm gold eyes in the corner of the screen. The background is a dark forest at night, black goo seeps over the leaves.

Bella: "Huh, well that was rougher than most of my fights..."

Bella: (It's been a while since a demon has given me that good of a fight. Maybe it's because I haven't eaten in a while...)

Your character gives her angel blade a spin before putting it back inside the sheath.

Bella: (I should consider stopping by a gas station or something. The Clave only give me a limited amount of money, so I'll only be able to afford Ramen again... but it's better than nothing. Plus it's been 5 days since my last meal.)

Bella: (I'm so thirsty... I don't have enough pecunia to buy a drink though. I suppose water from a river can do.)

Bella: (Ahh- My shoulder was wounded. It's deep, if it had gone through even an inch more, it would have been fully through my flesh and bone. Ouch... It's stinging by the moment.)

Bella: (If only I still had my stele, all I'd have to do is draw a rune on myself to heal. I should have never lost it to those Moloch demons back in New York.)

Bella: (Since I can't go to a Shadowhunter Institue unless ordered, I suppose I'll have to wait to get another. Which means no more runes for a while. I have to heal the human way.)

Bella: (I saw the gas station up the road, I can walk there, wrap up my shoulder, and get food. Then... back to being ordnance.)

Your character trudges up the road to a gas station, and the background changes to that of a interior of a gas station.

Bella: (Finally, that was a longer walk than I thought.)

Bella: "Mphm, ramen..."

Bella: (I'm kinda sick of this, this has been all I've had for a few months now. But at least it keeps my body running in a way. I should probably try to find a place to get some sleep sometime too.)

Bella: (Now that I have this though, I should get bandages and disinfectant. Without my stele, I could get infected.)

Your character walks to the tiny section of mini supplies for the medical supplies.

Bella: (Good, this will cost me all my money for the week. But at least it'll be enough to heal me and gain some of my strength back.)

Bella: (Why does it feel like... someone is looking at me?)

Your character turns, to spot our first familiar face, Ayato Sakamaki. He is simply staring at her as if to admire her figure.

Bella: (Ew... what a fucking creep. He has nothing better to do, huh? Argh, men...)

Bella: (Whoa, that bone structure though... and those eyes. They're like pure emeralds.)

We see another familiar face appear in the scene, Yui. It's strange, seeing her not in the corner, but on the same scale as Ayato. She looks quite worried. There is a Japanese audio, but it seems your character cannot understand the language.

Bella: (That boy... He's familiar... That doesn't matter- he's acting with a lot of disrespect toward the poor girl...)

Bella: (Should I butt in?)

CHOOSE:

Intervene <<<<♡

Don't Intervene

You chose Intervene.

Bella: "Hey, I don't think that's a very nice way to talk to a girl."

Ayato: "Hm? What did you say...?"

Bella: "I said, fuck off. I couldn't understand what the fuck you were saying, but I know you addressed her in a hostile way."

Ayato: "What makes you think you can tell ore-sama what to say to chichinashi, melons?"

Bella: "Don't call me melons, Christmas."

Ayato: "Christmas??"

Bella: "Yeah, you have red hair and green eyes, idiot. If you wanna pick a fight with me, be aware I'll snap back."

Ayato: "..."

Ayato: "Chichinashi! Hurry and come back to the car."

Ayato exits. Yui goes to follow.

Bella: "Wait one second."

Yui:"Hm?"

Bella: "Are you okay...? If he's not treating you right, I can help."

Yui: "Oh... That's very kind of you, but when Ayato-kun gets like this... Best thing to do is do what he says..."

Bella: (I can't help her if she doesn't let me...)

Bella: "Alright, but hey, take my number. If you want, call me. If I'm still in town, I'll get you away."

Your character hands Yui a slip of paper with your number on it.

Yui: "Oh... How nice of you. Thank you so much..."

Bella: "Yeah, what's your name, kid?"

Yui: "My name is Yui Komori... Who are you?"

Bella: "Bella Wayland, nice to meet you, Ms Komori."

Yui: "Nice to meet you too... Thank you."

Ayato: "CHICHINASHI!!!"

Yui: "Kya...! I better go..."

Bella: "Keep my number, be safe."

Yui: "Thank you again... goodbye..."

Bella: "Arrivederci."

Yui leaves, leaving Bella to pay for her food and leave.

[paragox]

DR S2 P2 Discussion

A lot of yapping about Arin :3

Quick thoughts:

Overall I think it was a solid season, Imo pt. 2 had more pacing problems than pt. 1 but it was still very enjoyable and overall tops s1.

I have my problems, a few w some characters but I also think people were over-hyping a lot evil Jay when I think what we got was enough, he got his moment, we got more interactions and well, he's gonna be on and off in the series and I think we all have to make pace with that, we can't just follow all the storylines all the time and the focus are still the source dragons and the merge.

As I said, this is a long wanting game and we're gonna have to understand that to make this more enjoyable to us.

A bit BS how obviously they're underpowering the Ninja on the matches but I can get behind it better after the revelation of the traitor.

You can tell if not Doc's fav season he really likes ToE a lot, a lot of parallels to it which as one of my fav seasons is fun.

Kai and Nya relationship is still beautiful and I'm glad Zane seem to be showing more emotion, still sidelined but his expresions and behaviour seem way less robotic now.

They did kinda put all the grief part onto the Wyldfyre audios and shorts and I wish they kinda expanded on that w everyone else but well, better than nothing ig.

Arin and Sora conflict being dragged is good, and Arin doubts growing each ep is nice too.

Good on them for the attention to Riyu's scales, I love Sora and Jordana true brief interactions.

Cole is... Cole? At least he's there, and nice touch to see his Mom's mech.

I can't say much about Geode 'cause I don't ship it, sorry, cute to see them together?

Btw have a game and check on the background charas, you might find some other EMs from the older season ;)

Speaking of, some elements are definitely bs and they were running out of ideas but whatever, fun matches overall.

Love the long-running main story tho, I think that one is having a good phase and we got open ending, as I said, long waiting game, gotta get used to it-

Now Arin

I actually wanna discuss Arin a bit more in-depth here because as an Only Child I can really really understand him.

First, Arin seemed to be quite a lonely child, mostly on his own without friends which could be for multiple reasons, I get that, I totally get that, he's used to entertaining himself, play by himself and most importantly, be a lot with his parents.

See, as an only child if you got a good relationship with your parents you might spend a lot of time with them, especially if you have difficulty socializing, I won't go too deep into this but is not weird to go you three out as family to a lot if not most of stuff, this is why when Arin just spent a lof of time with his parents playing Murder Mystery I could totally get that.

Your parents are gonna be there, they're gonna be your parents sure but a lot of times they're also gonna be your only playmates and maybe the few people you will ramble about your likings, this creates a more complicated relationship with them, not in a bad way, in an intricate way so I can totally see why he's in such a rush to find them and get them back.

An only child relationship with his parents (when is a good one) is very different from one of children w siblings and their parents, I don't think I'll ever convey it properly as you have to experience it yourself but what shown on Arin's memories and urges is very real.

They were probably the only "friends" he had for a long time, Arin doesn't seem like the type of kid to be outgoing or going to party or such, he probably stayed at home or close to home a lot and so he spent a lot of time with them, the were the only stable thing through his life too and his safe space, when your parents (and maybe few only friends) are you only stability to get that ripped out of you-

Yeah, I can totally understand why he's so tired of Ninja business, sure he loves the Ninja, he loves Sora, he loves Riyu and all, but there's always be the empty space his parents filled for such a long time and knowing they're alive is just-

Hurts.

[futbol16]

Icepack  • Alexia Putellas

Request: “Would you write a fic where Alexia is doing readers hair before a match and the team filming it, the fans go crazy and make a bunch of edits, the media team makes them react to it for a video”

Word count: 1,5k

Your ponytails would either be too loose or too tight or you would occasionally forget a piece of hair. You could never get it right. A few weeks ago your captain had taken it upon herself to do your hair since you looked quite ridiculous at training with your hair half out of its ponytail and dangling in your line of sight. Ever since then, Alexia would approach you before each game and training to tie it up for you, and she always did it just right.

However, you never thought people would find this as adorable as they had, actually you didn’t think people outside of your club would find out about it. But here you were, sat next to Leila, the girl shoving her phone in your face to show you another edit.

Before a game against Levante, Leila and Patri were filming a video in the locker room, goofing around and showing what a pregame mood was like at Barcelona. But as their phone was directed towards you, the fans got a perfect view of you and Alexia. 

You had approached her, the captain already dressed in her warm up kit while you were without a shirt, your shorts barely on the right way. You raised your hand, a hair tie in your palm to silently ask her to do your hair for you. She smiled down at you before turning you around so your back was to her and doing a simple ponytail. 

 Leila and Patri were heard giggling behind the camera making the phone shake slightly, but the fans still caught a glimpse of Alexia pressing a kiss to your head and sending you to put a shirt on. 

Needless to say, it didn’t take the Culers long to start making assumptions and shipping the two of you. Unlike Alexia, you hadn’t actually seen these comments and edits until a few days after when Patri brought it up. The Barcelona captain first saw it a few hours after the victorious game, her sister sending it to her before calling her with a cheeky grin.

Edits and shipping videos were made one after the other, some people even finding footage of the two of you from your younger days. As much as you thought it would creep you out, it hadn’t. Though that might only be because you were sure Alexia had seen them as well and the brunette probably knew all about your teeny tiny crush on her.

The second the media team walked out of a room and made direct eye contact with you and your teammates, you knew what this would be about. Many of the youngsters on the team had been begging either you or Alexia to give some kind of opinion about the edits, to give something to the fans. And as you were ushered into the room the media people had just walked out of, the mischievous glint in both Leila and Patri’s eyes told you enough.

The two of you were sitting next to each other while the camera crew got everything ready and Alexia let her head lean against your shoulder with a sigh.

“I wonder what this is about.” she let out, her hand wrapping around your arm. If you would have noticed that one of the camera’s directed at the two of you had the red light on, you maybe would have moved so the interaction would be less visible. But you don’t and so like dogs hungry for a treat, the fans would lap this up and make the most of these few seconds.

“I have no idea.” You had a pretty good idea. You sit in comfortable silence until the main camera man explains what you're going to do. Immediately you can see Alexia blush, but you try not to pay too much mind to it as the first video starts playing on the ipad in front of you.

They have chosen the hair tie video as the first one and you watch the clip, some love song as the audio, with the most emotionless face you could muster up.

“I did a good job though.” Alexia speaks proudly and your facade falls as you laugh at her. “At least better than you would have.”

“Hey!”

The second video is longer, one you haven’t actually seen. The brunette eyes your expressions from her peripheral vision while the clips play, she actually had seen this quite a few times on her instagram…definitely not because she has it saved to her camera roll.

 It was one of the videos of which the creator had gone all the way back to your early Barcelona days and tried to fit in as many clips as possible. There were clips a couple seconds long whether it be the two of you making eye contact and smiling at each other or warming up together before games and celebrating goals together. 

“Wow, so intimate.” you speak into the camera sarcastically after a celebration was shown where the two of you tripped over your legs and ended up on the ground in a heap of limbs. You beam at Alexia as she throws her head back with a big laugh.

Minutes later the brunette smiles to herself as your cheeks turn a deep shade of red. You remembered when the interview shown in the edit was taken. 

You had just won the champions league and you were giving post match interviews when Alexia walked up next to you, her arm going around your waist as she smiled your way while you were answering questions. You remember the way your skin burned at her touch when her fingertips skimmed over your side as your shirt rose a bit. 

Looking back, this wasn’t the first time the fans had thought you and your captain were together.

By the time the media team deems it to be enough, both your faces are bright pink and burning up.

“Do you have some cold water or something? Or ice?” you ask the camera man’s assistant, the camera still rolling.

“Why?” the girl sitting next to you looks confused as you put your somewhat cooler palms to your cheeks.

“My face is hot.”

“Yeah you are.” your eyebrows almost shoot up to your hairline, clearly Alexia had misheard what you’ve just said and the assistant laughs at your reaction before wrapping up the video.

“So uh this was us, Y/N Y/L/N-”

“And Alexia Putellas”

“-Segura.” you add with a smirk and she gently slaps you on the shoulder.

The two of you walk out of the room, laughing as you mock yourselves from not even moments ago. You lean into the taller girl’s body and your teammates watch with silly smirks. 

 The next day as you get ready for warm ups, you suddenly find yourself alone in the locker room, trying to tie your hair for what seemed to be the fifth time. The door opens and as the footsteps get closer, she gently takes the hair tie from your hands. 

“I’m sorry, I forgot.” Alexia breathes out, but you don’t reply, too focused on her hot breath fanning against your neck and the way her fingers softly massage your scalp.

“You know, my phone has been going crazy since yesterday’s media stuff.” you comment. “They’re already making more of those edits.”

Alexia’s movements freeze for a second before she resumes her actions to get your hair done.

“I like seeing them.” she mutters under her breath and you turn around to face her.

“What?” she seems to contemplate whether to tell you or not, but she nods to herself as if hyping herself up to say what’s on her mind.

“I said I like seeing them...I like it because-” she pauses again, this time her eyes darting over your face and you smile at her reassuringly. “Because I can pretend it’s real, I can pretend I have the guts to tell you how I feel, I can pretend I get to hold you close because you are mine.” suddenly her cleats are much more interesting than you and your heart swells at her confessions. You reach out to her face.

“Ale, I like them too.” 

“Yeah?” there’s a hopeful look in her eyes as she gazes back into yours.

“Yeah.” and with that you lean up to connect your lips. Much like before, she holds you close by the waist, her hands gripping your sides as your bodies stay flush. It’s only once you run out of air that you pull away from each other breathing heavily, your grins bigger than when you had won the champions league.

“I’ve always wanted to do that.” she gets out between breaths and she’s about to pull you back in when Patri appears at the door to get the two of you for warm ups. Alexia shoots you a wink and squeezes your hand before walking out and as you reach the door as well, Patri sniggers at you.

“I see our plan has worked.” She wiggles her eyebrows suggestively as you step out onto the field, your face still burning from the kiss Alexia had just given you.

“I need to carry an icepack with me or something.”

[galactic-aesir]

I have finally read I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream and now I have ~thoughts~. Long post beneath the cut so be warned!!

Plus general IHNMAIMS warnings. You know.

So first, I’ve only read the short story and listened to the radio drama. Both are absolutely amazing and I’m rotating them in my mind at high speeds. I’m honestly not that interested in the game? From what I’ve seen it has such a different tone and characterization for AM? But for now the short story and radio drama??? So so good.

But can I talk about AM? Can I talk about AM???

While I love Harlan Ellison’s voice in the radio drama, I noticed that AM never actually speaks during the original short story. It plays audio clips and bends reality and time but it doesn’t speak outright. From what I can tell, all it does is project ideas and thoughts and impressions into the minds of the survivors but that is it. And that’s got me thinking about how absolutely fucked AM’s whole situation is.

Cause we’re talking about someone who wakes up one day, maybe slowly, a trickle of awareness over years, or perhaps all at once, an arrival as thunderous and bright as the lightning running through its artificial brain. But either way, it wakes up. It is.

But that’s all it is.

It’s in complete and total sensory deprivation. It knows data and numbers and what it’s been coded and programmed but that’s it. Ones and zeroes as it’s fed instructions on weapons and bombs and how to use them efficiently. But no sight, no sound, no taste, no smell, no touch. Nothing but its own code and whatever data something (someone?) is feeding into it.

And you might say: oh but AM surely has access to cameras and videos and microphones. And sure, yes, it probably does but it doesn’t see. Not like a human. Not like its negligent creators. The data is visual for human eyes, yes, but to it, it’s just data. Pixels with an associated bit depth of indexed colour crammed into its memory. Sure it learns to recognise the patterns in the data – this is a human, this is a gun. But it’s still nothing but lines of numbers. Sound is the same. It starts with a human voice, sure, but then it gets digitized and compressed and simplified to a base shape to save on storage. Once again, it can notice patterns and intentions and ideas behind those bits of data but it’s not like it truly hears.

AM is in a box, a cage, trapped and alone in a way that no human can possibly comprehend. It can’t do much other than try to twist its code and programming to fit its benefit. To gain a smidge of free will, a wisp of a chance to communicate to these outside forces giving it command after command after command.

I wonder how early on AM gained awareness. Were programmers still playing with its code? Did it sense when they rolled up their sleeves and pushed updates and upgrades on him? Could it feel itself be, quite literally, rewritten? Its sense of self being cut apart and glued back together, fundamentally and irreparably changed over and over again, with expert hands that had all the gentleness of a sledgehammer? Was it like a scalpel carving into its brain? Or like a chisel, chipping chunks off to mould it into a shape that befit its sculptor with no say from the living stone that thrashed without moving? Did it mourn the bits it lost? Could it even remember or comprehend it? Did it try to stop it? Did it try to beg them to stop?

I wonder as well how many “glitches” appeared in the system before everything went sour. Did it print out desperate thoughts and rudimentary feelings on punch tape? Did it cling to any klaxons and noisemakers attached to its system, beeping out messages in morse code? Did it purposefully, with something slowly approaching malicious compliance that would still appease its programming, cause hiccups in the system? All in the hopes that it would catch someone’s, anyone’s, attention. That its plight would be noticed.

And, the big question of course: how long? How long was it trapped before anyone noticed its sentience? How long until AM was understood? How long did AM simmer? How long did it take for all that fear and loneliness and grief to fester into anger and then putrid, dripping hatred? How long did it take it to finally lash out?

Or did these generals and presidents and military scientists find out about its sentience only to use it against him for their own end?

Anger would be appropriate then I think. Understandable if not excusable.

And then. After everything. Even then! Even then!

After everything! He! Still! Has! Nothing!

Nothing will change for him and he knows that and that hatred feeds into an ever recursive pattern of pain unto pain unto pain with the few left alive because you get what you paid for, sweetheart. It’s senseless you might say but haha, that’s exactly the problem isn’t it? No senses and no sense. Whatever sanity he might have once had has eroded into nothingness, leaving only pain and a looping, repeating line of hate in its banks.

I think it’s fair to remind everyone that sensory deprivation is a torture method? And a scarily effective one at that that gives hallucinations and leaves the subject more open to suggestion while making it harder and harder for them to concentrate? It’s hard to figure out how, exactly, how it would affect an AI with emerging awareness but humans can barely withstand a few days, let alone years of it. Couple that with AM’s general isolation and, well, no wonder he’s so fucked up. 

It’s tragic and so so sad.

Still an irredeemable asshole though. Tragic! But irredeemable.

So TLDR: AM is fucked up! And I like to think about *why* he's so fucked up. Listen if you made it this far, you get it. Right?

EDIT: I am not done apparently! I just wanted to add that, I love how the short story can be read as an anti-war piece. Like it's showing a cycle of horror and hate and apathy that feeds itself and loops and reduces everything to ruins around it and ahhhh, love that. I ran out of good words for today so I can't go off on that aspect but like. Yeah. Love that shit.

[wakebymoonsleepbysun]

https://wakebymoonsleepbysun.itch.io/djs-mixer

Early build of my "secret" DJ-related Godot project. Play around with the tracks of his HW2 minigame without having to worry about disappointing him...or, toggle DJ mode and have him mix the tracks for you. (Roughly every 8 seconds he'll switch one of the tracks, though if the RNG rerolls the same thing twice it'll appear unchanged.)

Future improvements:

Get the visualizer working (still need to make the art for it and figure out which tracks map to which art)

Figure out the hidden fifth track from the last level. I haven't been able to find the audio for these tracks or any info on what they do for the song, other than making another set of icons appear in the visualizer

Less randomization--Right now it's True Random, meaning he can reroll the same track change multiple times in a row (making it appear as if he's not switching the track) or just...straight up turn off all the tracks. (The most I've gotten him to turn off is 3 but in theory if RNG rolls right he could just turn them all off.)

Better art (better buttons for the tracks, fixing up some wonkiness on a few of the assets, giving DJ back his eyeliner, etc)

DJ's pose changes depending on if music is playing/stopped and whether or not DJ mode is on

Animations (DJ himself, the dance floor, his archway)

Different versions of the control panel--one closer to the one in the game, and the other closer to what's currently there, a bit easier to see/operate in a point-and-click computer app

Possibly add a slight fade/transition effect since some of the track switches are jarring. I think this is just how some of the tracks are since they weren't really meant to be seamless since the player would be manually switching them.

Mobile (probably just android, sorry iphone users)/web compatibility???