talk2trees

[talk2trees]

Lemonade.

Night time, the time of slumber, and peaceful rest.

That night was a night like no other.

It felt as though I was watching from someone else’s perspective.

Like I was watching myself from the eyes of an audience.

Your hands reached for mine whilst we sat beside each other loathed in each other’s presence.

I don’t dislike you , but your actions i mutter breaking the silence.

I abruptly move my hand away from yours and shift further away.

You say I’m as ice cold as you’re glass of homemade violet lemonade.

You never liked my true state.

You wanted to use me squeeze me like a lemonade and dispose of me afterwards.

All you need was the parts of me you considered valuable.

You dried me out like a freshly squeezed lemon.

You criticised my true nature.

You spat me out and called me bitter.

You claimed I’d be be better if I was mixed with sugar.

You damaged me , sliced me up and threw me away.

You never consider my presence good enough to stay.

You liked me better with ice.

You never take my advice you couldn’t even consider trying a simple slice.

You were rough to taste your emotions were unpleasant and unkind.

You say I look better then how you’d expect me to taste.

You call me deceitful.

You say my existence is the epitome of evil.

You claim to prefer me homemade but I often feel canned.

I can’t escape your constant critiques and harsh judgment.

Lemonade.

Im not well made.

That’s what they claim.

I would say the same.

But who am I to complain.

Im just a name.

Im just Jane.

MonoSpced

[talk2trees]

~You’re not special ⭐️

[talk2trees]

(TW)

Pick you’re Poison 🪦

Sometimes I don’t cry.

I sit on the floor shaking like a leaf waiting to crack .

Sitting in silence waiting for a mental breakdown and the urge to reach for a bl@de.

Barely been a week clean but you and I both know it’s rare to reach 1 week .

I don’t feel shame in the morning not because I’m selfish as some would say,but because I haven’t felt anything in months.

I either go blank and zone out or leave the bathroom with long sleeves and baggy under eyes .

Id rather hide them then get help.

Id rather run from my problems then see them .

Im always running.

I run from my past knowing the decision I’ve made will forever follow me

I know what i did will always come back to haunt me.

I know I can never feel safe around the opposite gender ever again.

I will always suffer for the consequences of his actions and he won’t ever be held accountable.

So you either sit on your bathroom floor with a bottle of pills as vacant as your mind,or stare that bl@de down.

Or you confront him.

Both will be the reason for your demise , so you either take yourself out slowly,or take it quickly.

The decision is yours .