tallymarksystem
tallymarksystem
Tally Mark System
358 posts
DID system // 21 // collective pronouns are they/them
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tallymarksystem ¡ 1 month ago
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hey there! 19 y/o autistic system here. i just wanted to say thank you (collectively) so much for still having this acc up. you inspired us to start tiktok again because seeing your videos made me feel better about us. you presented very similar to us and i felt insecure being a prof. dx’d system but having “odd” alters. thank you for being the representation we needed.
Howdy! Hope you're doing well :]
I'm glad to know that us being open about our system and the ways our different parts present was able to help someone else feel more comfortable with themselves and their own experiences. Genuinely it means a lot, because it feels like it means what we produced in that rough time in our life meant something to someone. I'm endlessly thankful for the people who have expressed to us that they valued our content, you included. It really makes us not regret those couple years nearly as much as we might otherwise.
On the other hand, I would like to suggest caution for just like. systok in general. It isn't inherently bad or unhealthy, at least in my own view of it, but systok can be really rough. It can be positive, and you can find people who you relate to or who uplift you, but it's not always worth the negative side of it. Like I'm thankful we were able to be representation for some folks, but truthfully I wish we had known going into it that it would end up impacting us so negatively.
There will be people you love and there will be people who want to hurt you. Be careful with what information you share, and don't invest all of yourself in this. There will be positive experiences, but you will have to push through the negatives for them. Just brace yourself, and if it gets bad don't be afraid to leave. No one will hold it against you.
Now that I'm done sounding like a horoscope, I do want to reiterate gratitude for your message. Thank you for reaching out, and I hope you're doing well. :]
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tallymarksystem ¡ 1 month ago
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I genuinely regret posting any of my previous syscourse opinions on here or anywhere because my stances on a lot of things have changed. I feel like I've become more open-minded about the experiences and decisions of others and like. Learning and growing is amazing but boy does it make me feel weird about stuff I posted before the learning and growing
also tumblr wants to correct syscourse to "sycoses" ? is that like knock off psychosis or like
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tallymarksystem ¡ 1 month ago
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Reblog this post to ask mutuals to tell you their weirdest theory about u
EDIT: Fair warning this post is cursed and predictions are 7/10 times correct, play at own risk
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tallymarksystem ¡ 2 months ago
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i think in the end furries will always win. in whatever time it takes i think people are going to realize anthropomorphism is so deeply ingrained in us as creatures that to even invent a hatred of the concept to begin with is like hating the concept of telling stories or singing or dancing
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tallymarksystem ¡ 2 months ago
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“You shouldn’t self-ID as ADHD/autistic, you’re turning a very real mental condition into a trend” Ok then stop saying delulu. Stop speculating on which cluster C personality disorder the criminals you hear about on the news have. Stop saying “schizoposting” and “acoustic” and “is it restarted?” Stop using “psycopath” and “sociopath” as catch-all ways of calling someone a bad person. Stop saying “the intrusive thoughts won” when you bleach your hair and then turn your nose up at people who suffer from very real, very scary urges of physical/sexual violence. Stop saying “I’m so OCD” as a way of calling yourself neat. Stop treating BPD/ASPD/Bipolar as inherently abusive. Stop saying “OP I am living in your walls” without tagging for unreality. Stop diagnosing complete strangers you’ve never met on r/AITA with NPD.
You first. If you don’t want our disabilities to be treated like trends then stop belittling and minimising them. I’ll NEVER judge a person for trying find labels for their symptoms when an apathetic, racist, sexist, ableist healthcare system refuses to. But I will absolutely judge a hypocrite. Which a lot of you are
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tallymarksystem ¡ 2 months ago
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tallymarksystem ¡ 4 months ago
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if you've been putting up with toxic or abusive behaviors for months or years and you finally snap - it's not your fault. you're not a bad person. you aren't secretly cruel, you're just hurt enough that your fight-or-flight finally chose fight.
they will tell you otherwise. they will sob to you about how you're the problem. they will suddenly throw a book of sins at you - how you're manipulative, shouty, or whatever other thing fits their narrative. sometimes this will work, and you'll find yourself apologizing - usually for hours, days, months. i want you to write down when that happens, because it will help you let go when it's time to leave.
they will attack you on every front. they will re-write the entire encounter so that you are the aggressor. they will be horrified if you call it gaslighting, but you will know it's gaslighting because it's a stage beyond lying. genuinely, your world feels impossible and fake; like everything they see is somehow different than what you are seeing. (if it's legal in your state and you can get away with it without being caught, consider recording your arguments and listening back when you're safe).
they will try to imply you have mental health issues, or that you're deeply troubled and just unaware of it. it doesn't matter how kind, serene, and well-adjusted you are - they will make you feel crazy.
and the thing is that it works, because they are why you feel crazy. abusers particularly love targeting neurodivergent or otherwise minoritized populations. they love being able to point to any traumatic history you have. they will cite real things you experienced (panic attacks, depressive episodes) as evidence you're unwell.
they will figure out how to trigger you. if the silent treatment gets you riled enough to apologize, they will ice you out. whatever it is, they will figure out how to make you beg to just talk, and then act like it is a gift they're giving you another chance.
and since most of the time you're a regular guy, it's really hard to ignore the above multi-pronged attack. many of us do feel bad when we lash out or snap. we do feel shame and guilt. we spend our time wondering - was that demon inside me all this time? am i the reason this person usually acts like this?
just... stay strong and trust your own memories. write things down after they happen, as soon as you can. trust in your own anger and rage. remember you just aren't the kind of person who would snap like that without true force. "even a worm will turn". a wolf cannot be kept on a chain its whole life: at some point, we must bite back.
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tallymarksystem ¡ 4 months ago
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tallymarksystem ¡ 4 months ago
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"what was your childhood like?" idk I wasn't there
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tallymarksystem ¡ 5 months ago
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@ mutuals rb this w how tall you are i wanna know
i’m 4’11
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tallymarksystem ¡ 5 months ago
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Somewhat on the vibe of "your glorious revolution doesn't exist," I want to talk to you all, especially the young folks, about effective anarchism.
Spoiler alert, it's not blowing stuff up or arson.
I am considered the most anarchical person of all among my friends. Granted, most of my experience has been wreaking anarchy against the systems present in my high school and college, but the principles are the same.
Practical anarchy is not the big, flashy, romanticizable thing people online make it out to be. It's more about the long haul - digging in your teeth and just being a menace that no one can really get rid of.
Everyone's "Why vote when you can firebomb a Walmart" posts (that they don't follow through on) are just not pratical because this is a surveillance society. With CCTV and DNA testing and cell phone cameras and GPS tracking, if you do something big like that, you are GOING to be caught; then that is the end of your anarchical career. And, keep in mind that you might get caught while you're setting up this big event - it's a crime to blow up a Walmart and also a crime to conspire to blow up a Walmart, so your career in anarchy might end before it begins, and then you are permanently out of the game. No matter what causes you were working for that inspired you to do something big and violent that you thought would get someone's attention, you now can't help at all ever again in your entire life. What you did will be a passing headline on the news, and then everything will go back to exactly what it was because big, acute actions can't compare in effectiveness to small, constant actions (just being a thorn in the side of the system, poking and poking, but unable to be dislodged).
This is just the practical side of it too: think about the risk of hurting innocents if you really advocate for doing things like that. You think blowing up a Walmart would really make a dent in that big of a corporation? But if you intentionally or unintentionally kill a bunch of Walmart shoppers, that's going to devastate families that had nothing to do with whatever your cause is.
So all that big talk about violence and destruction: not practical, not effective, not ethical.
The only way I've started to change oppressive systems around me is by justing chipping away from within the confines of the rules of these systems, and/or only stepping just outside them (never breaking rules in a big way that could have allowed said system to easily and "justifiably" get rid of me).
So if you're going to be an anarchist, you need to consider:
Having the longest career in anarchism possible (i.e. being careful enough and judicious with your actions so that you don't get expelled from the system you wish to fight).
And then for any given anarchical plan:
2. Potential consequences.
3. Insurance.
I'll give you an example. I had serious beef with the culture of my college's science department. Students were constantly overworked, and if they expressed their misery outloud or reached out to any of their professors about their struggles, they got apathetic responses if not direct insults to their abilities or dedication. I had too many similar disparaging interactions with professors in one week, and I realized a lot of the responses I was getting were just the result of professors not really knowing how they sounded when they said certain things to students (ex: If someone says they're struggling with a course, don't IMMEDIATELY respond with "change your major," - you can give that as an option, but if you make it your first suggestion, the implication to the student is that if they're having any trouble with the course, they're not good enough for the program).
So I wrote up a flier of examples of good and bad ways to respond to students having anxiety with explanations and distributed it to every professor in the department. Everyone who knew about this perceived it as a great personal risk - that I would get in some kind of unspecified trouble or piss off an important professor, so before embarking on this project, I considered...
Potential consequences: I couldn't really think of any specific college or department rules I could be violating. People postered and handed out fliers in the department all the time. What I was doing fell pretty clearly under freedom of speech. I just shoved the fliers under professors' doors, so I didn't trespass in anyone's office. Worst I could think is that individual professors would get mad at me and make my life difficult, or I'd simply be told to stop fliering in the department.
Insurance: Just in case there were any consequences that I didn't think of and to insure me against the ones I had thought of, I didn't put my name on the flier. It was typed in Word, something everyone had access to. I came in to do it after professors had all left for the day but before I needed to use my ID to get into the building (no electronic record of me being there). I took the elevator to the first floor offices because the stairs require ID swipe after 5pm, but the elevators do not. I found out the building had no cameras by asking about it on the grounds that something of mine had been stolen a few weeks prior. I shoved the flier under the doors of dark offices and left it outside offices with lights on (so that no one would come out and spot me). And here's one of the most important pieces of insurance: I put up a few of the fliers on public bulletin boards in the building. This was important so that if I slipped up and said something that conveyed that I had knowledge of the content of the flier, I would have an excuse for that, i.e., I read it on the bulletin board before class this morning.
And then I did the thing. And surprisingly, it was incredibly well-received by professors. A few who knew that the flier must have been mine (because of previous, similar anarchical actions rumored to be associated with me) told me that everyone was RELIEVED that they finally had an instruction manual from the student perspective on what the hell they're supposed to say when one of their students is panicking. It sparked a real change in the vibe of the department and student experience. Had it instead pissed people off, I would have simply said I could not claim authorship of the flier but had read it and thought it contained good ideas then gone on creating more anarchy while angry people grasped at the zero straws I had left them to pin the action on me.
That's an example of a single action I took that was part of a much longer (~3 years) campaign of mine to change the culture of my department. Everytime I did something in that campaign, I made that consequences vs. insurance calculation to make sure they couldn't expell me from the program, the department, or the school before I succeeded.
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tallymarksystem ¡ 5 months ago
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25 ways to be a little more punk in 2025
Cut fast fashion - buy used, learn to mend and/or make your own clothes, buy fewer clothes less often so you can save up for ethically made quality
Cancel subscriptions - relearn how to pirate media, spend $10/month buying a digital album from a small artist instead of on Spotify, stream on free services since the paid ones make you watch ads anyway
Green your community - there's lots of ways to do this, like seedbombing or joining a community garden or organizing neighborhood trash pickups
Be kind - stop to give directions, check on stopped cars, smile at kids, let people cut you in line, offer to get stuff off the high shelf, hold the door, ask people if they're okay
Intervene - learn bystander intervention techniques and be prepared to use them, even if it feels awkward
Get closer to your food - grow it yourself, can and preserve it, buy from a farmstand, learn where it's from, go fishing, make it from scratch, learn a new ingredient
Use opensource software - try LibreOffice, try Reaper, learn Linux, use a free Photoshop clone. The next time an app tries to force you to pay, look to see if there's an opensource alternative
Make less trash - start a compost, be mindful of packaging, find another use for that plastic, make it a challenge for yourself!
Get involved in local politics - show up at meetings for city council, the zoning commission, the park district, school boards; fight the NIMBYs that always show up and force them to focus on the things impacting the most vulnerable folks in your community
DIY > fashion - shake off the obsession with pristine presentation that you've been taught! Cut your own hair, use homemade cosmetics, exchange mani/pedis with friends, make your own jewelry, duct tape those broken headphones!
Ditch Google - Chromium browsers (which is almost all of them) are now bloated spyware, and Google search sucks now, so why not finally make the jump to Firefox and another search like DuckDuckGo? Or put the Wikipedia app on your phone and look things up there?
Forage - learn about local edible plants and how to safely and sustainably harvest them or go find fruit trees and such accessible to the public.
Volunteer - every week tutoring at the library or once a month at the humane society or twice a year serving food at the soup kitchen, you can find something that matches your availability
Help your neighbors - which means you have to meet them first and find out how you can help (including your unhoused neighbors), like elderly or disabled folks that might need help with yardwork or who that escape artist dog belongs to or whether the police have been hassling people sleeping rough
Fix stuff - the next time something breaks (a small appliance, an electronic, a piece of furniture, etc.), see if you can figure out what's wrong with it, if there are tutorials on fixing it, or if you can order a replacement part from the manufacturer instead of trashing the whole thing
Mix up your transit - find out what's walkable, try biking instead of driving, try public transit and complain to the city if it sucks, take a train instead of a plane, start a carpool at work
Engage in the arts - go see a local play, check out an art gallery or a small museum, buy art from the farmer's market
Go to the library - to check out a book or a movie or a CD, to use the computers or the printer, to find out if they have other weird rentals like a seed library or luggage, to use meeting space, to file your taxes, to take a class, to ask question
Listen local - see what's happening at local music venues or other events where local musicians will be performing, stop for buskers, find a favorite artist, and support them
Buy local - it's less convenient than online shopping or going to a big box store that sells everything, but try buying what you can from small local shops in your area
Become unmarketable - there are a lot of ways you can disrupt your online marketing surveillance, including buying less, using decoy emails, deleting or removing permissions from apps that spy on you, checking your privacy settings, not clicking advertising links, and...
Use cash - go to the bank and take out cash instead of using your credit card or e-payment for everything! It's better on small businesses and it's untraceable
Give what you can - as capitalism churns on, normal shmucks have less and less, so think about what you can give (time, money, skills, space, stuff) and how it will make the most impact
Talk about wages - with your coworkers, with your friends, while unionizing! Stop thinking about wages as a measure of your worth and talk about whether or not the bosses are paying fairly for the labor they receive
Think about wealthflow - there are a thousand little mechanisms that corporations and billionaires use to capture wealth from the lower class: fees for transactions, interest, vendor platforms, subscriptions, and more. Start thinking about where your money goes, how and where it's getting captured and removed from our class, and where you have the ability to cut off the flow and pass cash directly to your fellow working class people
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tallymarksystem ¡ 5 months ago
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It’s uncanny how similar Trump is acting like Hitler. People are now doing the Nazi salute. They’re drawing the symbol. The KKK was seen in Kentucky asking people to join them. ICE has been ripping families apart. Companies have pulled back Diversity Initiatives. We’re no longer part of WHO and there won’t be any communication from the CDC at least until February 1st. We’re being censored and the news can’t be trusted. Thousands of Americans didn’t know there were protests against Trump yesterday outside the U.S. Quotes from The Handmaid’s Tale and Anne Frank have been compared to what’s going on right now.
According to The Lemkin Institute for Genocide Studies and Prevention the U.S. has officially been given a red flag alert for Genocide.
I’m exhausted but I will never stop being angry.
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tallymarksystem ¡ 5 months ago
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i hate to say it because i'm neurodivergent and a chronic-pain-haver but like... sometimes stuff is going to be hard and that's okay.
it's okay if you don't understand something the first few times it's explained to you. it's okay if you have to google every word in a sentence. it's okay if you need to spend a few hours learning the context behind a complicated situation. it's okay if you need to read something, think about it, and then come back to re-read it.
i get it. giving up is easier, and we are all broken down and also broke as hell. nobody has the time, nobody has the fucking energy. that is how they win, though. that is why you feel this way. it is so much easier, and that is why you must resist the impetus to shut down. fight through the desire you've been taught to "tl;dr".
embrace when a book is confusing for you. accept not all media will be transparent and glittery and in the genre you love. question why you need everything to be lily-white and soft. i get it. i also sometimes choose the escapism, the fantasy-romance. there's no shame in that. but every day i still try to make myself think about something, to actually process and challenge myself. it is hard, often, because of my neurodivergence. but i fight that urge, because i think it's fucking important.
especially right now. the more they convince you not to think, the easier it will be to feed you misinformation. the more we accept a message without criticism, the more power they will have over that message. the more you choose convenience, the more they will make propaganda convenient to you.
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tallymarksystem ¡ 5 months ago
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wild how we have a medication that is super effective at treating a debilitating disability but its controlled to hell and back because What If Someone Takes It For Fun like i have an idea who gives a shit
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tallymarksystem ¡ 5 months ago
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Trans places exist, kid hold on
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tallymarksystem ¡ 5 months ago
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i dont care about validity i care about my civil rights
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