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That's not a threat. That's an ill wish. a threat would be: I will steal all your favorite comfort food

Conventional threats like “hope you rot” or “burn in hell” are boring, cliche, likely to not happen.

Unconventional Threats with a slim or likely chance of happening like,

“I hope the next time you go buy your comfort food, it’s sold out”

Groundbreaking.

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I wrote a little short story about roadkill that I'm very proud of

I wanted to write about the animals I find on the roads but not give them human personalities because while human personalities make people sympathize, writing them acting like animals makes people feel more guilty when in truth they don't act like people

Anyways, I'm rambling 😅 the short story is below the cut

The sky was black and littered with bright white speckles that seemed to twinkle as a young fawn trailed behind his mother. lured by her smell of dew and wood but struggling to step over the large blades of grass under his hooves. He was only a week old, his freckles on his back still bright and his legs still shaky but yet he kept going, hearing the gentle call of his mother ahead. They neared a hill that seemed to cut through the pine forest they lived in and just across it was the home they shared. As they got closer the burning smell of tar and gas grew stronger. It was a horrible smell, it burned the lungs of the fawn every time by its strength but nonetheless they came across these paths all the time. It wasn't new anymore nor was the pain that came with it.

But this fawn came across a small sparrow laying on the ground, its wings spread across the gravel, its feathers messy and mangled covered with spots of blood and bits of maggots. He had seen brown sparrows like this before but never this close, and what an odd thing to see, he pressed his nose on the tail feathers of the bird that stood up and blew in the breeze. The small bird was cold and silenced of the songs it once sang and no matter how much he pushed the bird would never sing again. But his curiosity was cut off by the low call of his mother as she walked on the flattened path of grey tar. He perked his head up and stumbled to follow pushing himself further up the hill. He climbed up slowly, his legs shaking and his tiny little body couldn't move as fast as his mother, but that didn't stop him.

Once he could see over the hill he saw a large odd shaped thing with two large lights matching the speckles in the sky but only brighter speeding towards his mother, who didn't have time to dash forward before it crashed into her and sent her in the air to the other side of the path. And when this unearthly thing kept going past he was able to see his mother laying on the ground on her side. Her neck bent backwards, her mouth hanging open with a strong metal smell and a pool of red pouring out of it and staining the rocks that held her, her black pools for eyes were wide open and reflected the moon above them, she was laying in a way she never did before, her legs spread out and unprotected. The fawn stepped forward feeling the smooth rocks against his small hoofs leaning his head forward to smell her path. But that smell he once knew was gone and replaced by the smell of metal and wet earth. He let out a small chirpy call to his mother as he slowly walked forward and stepped on a splatter of red where his mother was first hit. That smell was new and he didn't like it. His nose kept to the ground trying to identify it, but he couldn't. But then he too was bathed in a bright light just like his mother. He lifted his head to look at the two large lights that he only thought were the things that covered the night sky every night.

But this was more painful.

He was only a week old.

This kind of pain was all new, the twisting of his bones, the feeling of his guts escaping from his stomach and mouth, it burned, it tore him to pieces. But soon he couldn't feel anything.

And never saw his mother again.

>>><<<

The cleanup crew on the highways got so much roadkill they started to ignore the smaller animals, but deer were too large to keep on the roads. So when they came around with their large and loud machines they saw the sight for themselves. On one side of the road was a large doe with a bloated belly making her look much bigger than she was. But straight ahead was an animal that they couldn't identify, it was just a large splatter of blood and meat and its once gleaming brown fur soaked in it and shredded. Never would they ever tell that it once was a small deer, heck they could sure try and guess. But they left that splash of gore before cleaning up the dead doe.

And that was it.

Crows would eat the fawn occasionally but it stayed there until the splash turned brown and the crows and vultures had their fill.

But that was the end of that small deer, not even a month old and his life ended so quickly. But what could have been done? Only if the pair waited the whole thing would have been avoided. But they were just animals that wanted to sleep for the night.

Only for both to never wake from it.

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Yes, this is EXACTLY what you voted for.

You voted for a clown sleep farting through his court case. A convicted felon and lifelong rapist. The swamp incarnate. A narcissist and fraud willing to do anything to enrich himself.

Voting for Harris/Walz was clearly better considering your kids' student debt and husband's job situation.

You picked the unserious choice. You lost.

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#PBS teaches kindness and inclusion, which are threats to abusive paternalism.

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I love my untalented mediocre son

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I love my cat!

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I really wish that the actual newspapers would adopt this model.

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her ♥️

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IM ANGRY

This is not star treck!! this is not what the federation was built off of!!! Why is star treck advocating against saving children?! Why is archer immediatly regarded as insane for wanting to save children?!

later in the episode they say:

Of coars they wouldn't there actively trying to eradicate man kind!

but i dont care

you do the right thing because its the right thing! be the change and what not. you cant kill german children because the nazis what to kill you! you can't kill palistinan children just because hamas wants to kill you! you cant kill israely children just because the israely govenment is trying to kill you!

being attacked dosen't make you above morality!

NOTE: tucker's opinion is the oppinon that progresses the plot, this is the opinoin that 'saves the day' in the end (and it's quite obvios from early on so i don't consider it a spoiler) they discover that Archer was biologicaly manipulated by the acid spray to protect these xindi children. and thats the only reason children should be protected apearently? throwing Star Treks powerful humanist morals right out the window. this is the worst star treck by far. (I hope, I havent seen anything newer then this)

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How is hooters a successful buisness? How is anyone ok with a "resteraunt" in which you're encoraged to oggle at waiters? How do women agree to work there?

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I am a huge fan of retiring to my quarters

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Someone who openly celebrated sexual abuse of children has been arrested for sexual abuse of children.

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More proof that capitalism was never "freedom" or "small government".

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After reading aloud a picture book about a puppy that works in a coal mine, local first grade teacher Brianna Montgomery asked her students Thursday what they want to be once child labor laws are repealed. “I want everyone to grab some crayons and draw a picture of what you want to be once the governor rolls back all the child labor laws,” Montgomery said as shouts of “fish processor!” and “farm laborer!” filled the classroom.

Full Story

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huh. so i just found out "Torment Nexus" was invented for that one specific meme. i genuinely thought it was from an Orson Scott Welles novel. my ignorance is an unending source of surprise and delight

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I used to work at the zoo, and one time, a gorilla died of old age 

Problem was, it was the only gorilla in the zoo because it wasn’t very profitable. The gorilla was by far the most popular attraction, and they couldn’t afford to go a single day without it.

So the zoo owner came up to me and said, "For an extra $100 a day, do you want to put on this gorilla costume until we can afford a new one?"

Of course, I said yes.

Pretty quickly, I became the biggest hit at the zoo. Everyone wanted to see the human-like gorilla.

About a month later, the craze started to die down, but they kept pressuring me to get people’s attention again. So, in a desperate attempt, I climbed over to where the lions were and started hanging off the net.

Suddenly, this massive crowd gathered, and everyone looked terrified. I could feel my grip slipping — I couldn't hold on any longer. I started screaming, "Help! Help!" — and then I fell.

The lion rushed toward me, and just as I thought it was over, he leaned in and whispered, "Shut the fuck up before we all get fired."