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The Buni Perspective Review Stranger Things and 2

Subtitle: Steve Harrington Why Don’t You Love Me?

Hello and welcome again to The Buni Perspective! This is the blog version of this. There may or may not be a comic version and show creator Michael Bennett is currently scripting a new webcomic. Heather and Michael will be hosting a podcast soon and that’s it for news! Here’s my review!

I loved it!

There is a lot of things I could parrot, it’s a great homage, it’s fun, it has great kid actors. I didn’t say much about season 1, I thought it was well above average and honestly not perfect. Like it’s not perfect enough to mention it’s not perfect. It’s very close.

I think Stranger Things 2 is perfect. The Buffer Brothers were on Harmontown and they really delivered on their promise. I know the hype machine is in full force, but Harmontown, where pee is yellow and poop is brown, is not a place for lying.

The Buffers promised that season 2 was not going to be Gremlins 2. They delivered on that promise. I feel like season 1 hits me for REALLY different reasons than season 2. Mainly: the other.

The other in both is both villain and isolator. Because the alien is so weird that describing it makes you sound crazy! It happens too that all the characters have flaws and the people around them, rather than listen and believe, just blame their crazy notions on excuses to get out of trouble. Or to deal with loss.

We know it’s all real. In a lot of ways, ‘cray’ is all real, to those afflicted. I feel like ST2 is not frustrating like others because the characters learn this. The characters are much more understanding much quicker. The lesson is, hear them out. 

In season 2 this is used against them of course, spoilers, but yea, it’s a really great season so far.

I dunno who doesn’t have access to this, one way or another but you should watch this. If you are stubbornly ignoring this series because YOU think you see all it’s depth based on it’s memes, I’ve kinda learned that it’s not worth the effort to correct this behavior. 

Until the next time I review something, byeeeeeeeee!!!

[thebuniperspective-blog]

“I have literally never sinned” My Complex Feelings About Watching Lindsay Ellis’s Videos

I have a history with Lindsay that for years now I’ve refused to think about. I don’t think this is going to reconnect us at all or anything, but I’ve been watching her stuff and I wanted to talk about...PTSD!

PTSD is like, it happens. I didn’t know that it could happen to me until my puppy died. OH HEY! This blog has a dead puppy in it, so let’s go.

When I lived in Michigan I wasn’t happy. Leaving LA broke me. I felt like an utter failure. I wasn’t very interested in sex, I was desperate to get high as possible and drawing as much as I could. 

At this time, I was drawing all the Channel Awesome people as steampunk heroes.

Andrew Dickman did this to much more deserved acclaim, with his super heroes. I got Lindsay’s attention on a livestream and then at MAGFest we hung out and had a great time. Taht convention was the best time of my life, nothing before compared to that long weekend in DC. 

I promise to have a happy, fun blog talking all about that time. Buuutttt, learning to foxtrot with Kyle, defining Internet Personalities with Vangelous and waving a sonic screwdriver at Kyle (again) while Linkara was setting up his big crossover.

But coming out as bi and polly feels much better. Admitting I love Meghan and Heather to my family was more important, making them see that I would not stop Heather from finding love anymore than she was going to stop me. Embracing my love of femboys and twinks has really made my feel...whole. And the comic we are writing wouldn’t happen without me coming out.

So blah blah Lindsay and I have history. Then the depression really took hold.

I want to say that this sounds blamey. It’s just stuff that triggered my depression, so take it understanding that this stuff isn’t an issue for me now.

My brothers were part of it, they made making my show feel like a burden. No one wanted to make The Bunny Perspective and that included me.

The Bunny Perspective unraveling is a blog for another day but the Sifl and Olly and Stuck reviews broke the show.

Then ConBravo happened and during the panel I was featured in with the other Chez producers, I wasn’t asked a single question. And she didn’t see me at my panel making puppets with Dan where I was likeable and happy. 

After Lindsay fired me and Justin killed himself I was done. I tried a bunch of things to make reviewing and the whole Channel Awesome personality cult work for me, but I couldn’t. Art wasn’t fun and then my Cintiq broke so digital art was much much more difficult. 

But my depression got more manageable. I changed my diet, started just playing games League mostly, and my mom got a dog. A pomeranian puppy we named Ripley. She’s white and smol and perfect. And still alive. And I LOVE this dog. She is the first dog I ever loved. 

So last year mom said she was gonna have too many dogs and asked if I wanted Ripley and I said YES. Then she realised she loved Rip too much and wanted to keep her, so I say, ‘Just get me a pom’ and she did.

And I killed it. His name was Marvin, a black male and he choked on food I gave him. He died in my hands. Died with crying and wailing. “Come on buddy.” I’m crying...hang on...

Chaos is real, be kind.

I’ll talk more about that later, it’s just to frame the fact that I realise I have PTSD and that many, many people must also have all kinds of levels of stress when a bad memory is triggered. 

I get visions of my dead dog sometimes, at random and I have really talk myself down. That dog dying was so traumatic I barely remember any of it, good or bad.

Lindsay is a trigger for me. Not as big of course, but watching her videos made me realise I miss talking to her. That is so fucked up to admit but here I am. I miss talking to her so much. 

I never wanted to date Lindsa. I just liked her. We got each other in a weird ways and were so different about so many things. I remember her drunkenly demanding I defend My Little Pony, it was funny. She was challenging to talk to. It’s refreshing to have people who see a perspective like your own, but not your own.  

Then she was super shitty to my girlfriend.

I’m not gonna rehash it here, it’s not that it wasn’t really miserable thing that Lindsay did, I just also see her perspective too. But yea, ConBravo was when I think Lindsay and crew really saw that:

A) I had problems too big to deal with, depression and mood unpredictability

B) dropping me would not effect their audience

I don’t blame them, just wish it wasn’t so coldly done. I wish they had cared more. I get the idea Lindsay couldn’t tell me, so Nella did. Again, this isn’t like...I’m not trying to be mean, just like...blah blah drama

I wish I had a chance to take some time off and try coming back with a new show. But I assume they didn’t think I was capable of changing or whatever.

I’ve been watching Lindsay’s videos. They are fucking good. They are good in ways I frankly didn’t expect. 

Lindsay has always made better content than her peers. I feel like she’s really making stuff she likes now. That’s really great. Her episode on Aids and on Guardians were particularly insightful and as someone that REALLY relates to Rocket Raccoon, it was one that made me cry.

But I mean I cry all the time.

Anyway. I’m gonna subscribe and click the dumb fucking bell icon and *jerk off motion* and blah blah...I miss having friends. 

I have always had an extremely hard time asking for help. I still do.

But now two smart, cute amazing girls love me. Really care about me and are helping me write the best thing I’ve ever written (not this blog, you’ll see soon enough). I finally have a life goal and trying to make friends with my old friends would help me with that.

I really miss Lindsay, more than I ever thought I did. I thought I missed Kyle, but I think that pales compared to the void Lindsay leaving my life left. I’ve filled that void, I’d like to talk to her again, especially now that I don’t want anything from her but a good conversation.

[thebuniperspective-blog]

TalentlesSmerf: A Blog About League of Legends, Zen and Self Improvement

Hello! Wow, wrote one Blog then pissed off didn’t I? Well, not true. Well, it’s sorta true. I was struggling to find a good framing device for these blogs. And then some things happened recently that made me take a really hard look at my internet life.

So, anyone who knows about me knows I had a very public meltdown many years back and then quietly stopped making content. We actually made a lot of ambitious stuff but it’s hard to shift audiences. 

I started playing Hearthstone and League of Legends. League I’ve got more hours into than any other game across 4 accounts. WE’re going to take a long hard look at what I keep doing wrong. 

Writing this I’m admitting that I have had 1 account permanently banned and as of yesterday my second main account got a 14 day suspension. So what the fuck happened? It’s not that my internet is bad and I kept getting kicked from games.

It’s toxic comments in chat.I get lazy and comfortable or I take out real life shit and here I am, playing my 3rd smerf account ever. I’m admitting this in public because it is easily the most embarrassing thing I’ve ever done. Getting this second ban for basically the same reason tells me I need to make myself be better.

So, this blog subsection is talking about how I intend to be better. I hope they show more me than the game, I promise not to bog this down with game terms, save that for a podcast. 

Soon I hope that vlogs will go with this as well. TalentlesSmerf is my redemption and then I intend to take my broke, 0 honor account and get the highest I can. I also want to hit gold this season, I think focusing on play and livestreaming matches will help. 

I want to keep this brief, more soon! Thank you for reading and see you on the Rift!

[thebuniperspective-blog]

The First Blog, Wherein I Come Out As Queer & Dunno How Long Titles On Tumblr Should Be: I Had a Weird Week

Hi, I’m Michael Bennett producer of The (Bunny) Buni Perspective! and I had a bad week. Kinda of an amazing week. And here I am, talking about things I’m now no longer embarrassed to disclose.

I’m going to talk about the week in sections as they come to me, so this might jump around a little, but it ends with Bunny Bennett and a promise to see you tomorrow.

Warning frank discussion of sex, pot and LSD use and cursing you fucking dumbshits. I promise not to be too gross.

I Joined, Figured Out, and Then Deleted Grindr, In One Single Day.

Pause for applause.

Grinder is not for highly specific queers. The title queer is feeling like the correctt word for me, as it also means weird. . So I’m polly, so far I’m deeply in love with two girls. I’ll be writing more about Heather and Meghan in the next few blogs. Promise girls.

I’m turned on by femininity. Not just sexually, feminine things were the bane of my childhood and now they draw me in. To make this simple my ideal girl, in pop culture for many, many reasons, is some variation of:

  ...35 and inserting gifs that make you blush...shame....

The thing is, I have for years been drawn to femboys and just shoved the feeling down. I can see the first guy I wanted to ask on a date vividly in my mind. I have a really hard time explaining it, but if Pearl were a boy, he’d be my dream guy. 

I’m also polly, so on the Internet I’m a ‘faggot cuck’

I promise tomorrow I will discuss the polly aspect of my sexuality in ore detail, for now just know I’m just complicated. 

Ok so, how do I convay any of that on Grindr? I can’t. I want to have a conversation. You cannot say that because it starts ‘hey’ then it’s just dick pics or boring, predictable bullshit.

I had a big realization. I’m a fucking jerk. I’ve been chatting online for decades and have treated the majority as badly as these guys treated me. Not that I sent dick pics, but if they didn’t do what I wanted I wasn’t nice or polite. Often I wouldn’t read their info well. I dunno. I felt pretty bad being ignored and hit on cause apparently I’m adorable?

...fat piece of shit.

The REALLY cute girls on grindr were a minimum 100 miles away. None want to do a long distant thing, which is really what I want right now. And frankly the guys I want to meet are girls. And I know I’m queer because the other day I said, ‘That cock is adorable’ and that is not what a straight man says. 

I feel a lot better saying all that. Let’s talk about my favorite game I need to quit.

I Can Spot A Catfish A Mile Away After Two Full Days Of Talking Out Loud

I was playing League and I out of no where got a friend request. I take all of these, usually remembering them from a recent game. Not this time. First thing ‘she’ said was “I always get call a catfish” DOT DOT DOT

This ‘girl’ played well, we chatted in game, ‘she’ was REALLY flirty and I bought ‘her’ many skins in game, maybe 50$ worth? Can’t remember for my embarrassment's sake. I begged this person to talk to me face to face on skype and they made it into a fight every time. So I cut it off.

This happened to me recently. This person refused to talk to me while we played games (me out loud into my headset, and ‘she’ replying in chat). Every hour I begged this person to talk to me in anyway. At first they told me they only spoke Japanese and ‘she’ was embarrassed about the language, ‘she’ understood me too well for that, think I literally said, ‘What are you Chewbacca?’

I basically just talked. They replied and were REALLY needy. I mentioned skins at last and they changed how they talked a lot but then suddenly, this person couldn’t talked to me because of childhood tongue biting induced tongue paralysis. Also their name was Soka Hui? Apparently?

They told me their family was massacred. Like RECENTLY. So I looked it up:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-wolf-family-murders-north-dakotas-most-brutal_us_57fbe48ae4b0b665ad818798

That’s scary tho if that person recorded me.

I Fell in Love With a Guy

I did not want to. I could hear the mocking voices of my brothers from my childhood, the ghosts of my high school, the word ‘faggot’ as anything but gross, not something that turned me on. Not something I whispered to a guy, begging me to...he didn’t love me. He sounded really fucking pretty when he said I love you. He said my name so beautifully the echo of it makes me cry as I write this now. 

I would have called him a fucking faggot in 1997 and been angry. Might have gotten violent.

Now I wish Dexter would just say anything, perched in my lap and...

Well it’s stupid to dwell on things. I learned a lesson. The lesson here is ‘you can’t win, but always try.’ 

Here’s why: I did everything right, this is how Meghan and I began. Dexter and I have talked on and off for months. For about 8...maybe a year. Dexter was my dirty little secret. 

He called me and moaned and we...you know whatever, but always behind Heather’s back (she knows now). I hated to admit that guy was really...

Well he got a hold of me at the beginning of the week.

He told me that he wanted me to make love to him, say ‘I love you’ to me on his boyfriend’s bed. I took this too mean he wanted me to be in love so...we talked. 

We talked for an hour and I was so in love. He was interesting and funny. He had comedy bits memorized. He loves Star Wars.I wanted to keep talking. I thought we’d at lest text later.

I wanted to Love Star Wars with him. I wanted to meet him and do whatever he wanted. He cut off the call...I should have known an hour was kind of short compared to girls I had talked to in the past.

I didn’t hear from him for 3 days.

I had all this confused love in me. I barfed it all up. He was masturbating. Trying to get me to talk about sex and I was stammering and nervous and near crying. I told he was my first guy...the guy I was in love with, for real and he cut me off. There was a really hard to describe, painful, awkward silence. 

I flashed back to all the folder of evidence I had that he loved me, the saw the mountain of facts that said he was just getting off to me using him. Or...something. We haven’t spoken since.

I told him ‘I have a lot of cosplay ideas’ and he laughed.

He said he had to go and I said ok. He said ‘Talk to y-’ but I hung up and threw the phone. Cried. Last my game of League. Told Heather and Meghan. Cried in the shower.

I told Meghan and Heather about this guy throughout the three days he went silent. Meghan has a number of really hot ideas involving some third male person. Heather is asexual but really really like the idea of live yaoi.

Dexy...Dexter hurt me, really badly. I tried anything for a few days to distract myself, the catfish, grindr, other guys I know from chat rooms. I over bared myself to them when I could just do that here and link it.

That leads me to:

If We Got Married No One Would Have to Change Their Last Names, Cartoonist Who Draws Like Me, Puppeteer Who Made a Way Better Puppet Than Me and I Love It and Other Reason Why I Might Be In Love With Isabella Bunny Bennett

A long time ago. And right now I’m pausing to see if I can find the thing...

Ok as far as I know it’s gone? Maybe I can get it from Linkara’s title card artist.

He and I interviewed Isabella back when she in the long ago times and it was one of the all time best conversations I had ever had in my life. She is bright and funny and clever and i’m crying again, what the...Ok I came back in twenty minutes later to fix this mess. I did start crying a little. It’s hard to remember it all but Bunny was so natural, we finished each other’s thoughts. I really wanted to talk forever. She’s so...shit literally crying...

This was a very long time ago, John was still in the band.I lost track and my internet presence took a nose dive. That will get many blogs.

Her twitter posts recently (Sept’17) are really lining up with how I feel.The normal places I thought I could meet someone online, are failing me. It’s frustrating, but I can do one thing at least. Flirt with Isabella. I flirt with art:

I got no context for this guy at the bottom...he didn’t get my context clearly.

Anyway

...

.....

...in the song Burning in the Stratosphere she makes a kissy noise and says...’I love you’ but at the beginning in a near whisper...chills. I wasn’t expecting it, really hadn’t visited the album it’s on til tonight.

I hope to talk more about Isabella in the future. I’m a chaos magician, so it’s likely to happen.