thematchmakingoffice - Tumblr blog

[thematchmakingoffice]

Don't people call you (the school) 'the best and most excellent school' out there?

So doesn't that technically mean that there are other schools out there? Not including Exillium.

There used to be until Alina framed them for tax evasion. She left Exillium alone so she could send the students she didn’t like there.

[thematchmakingoffice]

For anyone wondering about the office’s word on this, Former Councillor Fintan Pyren’s bosom size is considered apart of his matchmaking profile and therefore classified information.

fintan’s ass is so flat that all that’s visible of his ass/upper thigh area is a flap of skin at the very front. there’s just. nothing there. it’s a void of nothing.

.

[thematchmakingoffice]

Does anyone know if the red coats (forbidden cities) won their civil war?

[thematchmakingoffice]

…

are you sure about that

So when Councillor Terik fakes an ability it's all fine and dandy but when I, Timkin Heks-

[thematchmakingoffice]

Is Della pretty?

Yeah

[thematchmakingoffice]

(ooc: what information should i put in to get a match?? im sorry im not good at rping 😭)

ooc: I do not actually give people matches I just talk about matchmaking stuff

[thematchmakingoffice]

SO YOU’RE THE REASON I HAD TO GIVE THAT PRESENTATION ON FANFICTION?!?!?

elf AO3 sucks because immortals don't really place a lot of importance on speedy updates, and sometimes you have to wait over a century for the next chapter of that bronte/kenric/reader smut you were reading, by which time kenric is dead, and you've really mostly moved on from that particular fantasy anyways

[thematchmakingoffice]

Fintan's body temperature is naturally higher than other elves (all pyrokinetics are like this) so therefore, for better or for worse, he gives really good hugs

i’d say he gives WARM hugs, not necessarily GOOD ones (he probably hasn’t hugged someone in like a thousand years 💀 he probably forgot how to. it would be the most awkward embrace you’ve ever seen)

ahem. also using this as an excuse to drop more pyrokinesis thoughts that i have written in my notes app:

- if pyrokinetics generate a much higher amount of body heat than the average elf would everyone else feel slightly colder to them?? (since i guess it’s technically canon that pyrokinetics feel feverish to the touch so it would make sense wouldn’t it)

- ^^ touching a pyrokinetic’s forehead like “aww you have a fever :(“ no! they are just always warm. the way you can tell if a pyrokinetic has a fever is if their forehead literally burns your hand when you touch it (ouch)

- i feel like it would also be logical to assume that since they can draw heat from someone’s body and use the heat to burn said person (shoutout fintan book 2 memory break scene), they’d also just naturally be able to sense if a person’s body temperature was rising since they’re so acutely aware of all the heat around them (not saying they could also be used for lie detector tests if an empath wasn’t available but that’s exactly what i’m saying)

- which then leads me to wonder… if they can draw body heat from someone then surely they’d be able to manipulate it in other ways without burning them right? like forget body temperature regulation skills, just have a pyrokinetic hold your hand if you’re cold and boom they’ll make your whole body warm (not just your hand)

- they could probably also manipulate heat particles in the air without sparking them into flames so like they could make a room warmer or something

ok that’s all thanks for reading

[thematchmakingoffice]

Don’t worry guys, I am aloud to quit, I just have to put in my 20 decades notice first.

[thematchmakingoffice]

It seems elves are very divided on this topic.

[thematchmakingoffice]

Okay

Hello, Regent Dizznee.

Recently it has come to my attention that some of the councillors are under informed on the topic of online safety and general internet based information.

I would like to know if you’d be interested in participating in a class of sorts to fill in the gaps of their knowledge.

Best wishes,

@thematchmakingoffice

…hm…

…sure.

[thematchmakingoffice]

I think I may have missed this notification, sorry for responding late. I’ll start planning the meeting.

[thematchmakingoffice]

If I manage to schedule this, I will contact you with the time of the meeting.

Hello, Regent Dizznee.

Recently it has come to my attention that some of the councillors are under informed on the topic of online safety and general internet based information.

I would like to know if you’d be interested in participating in a class of sorts to fill in the gaps of their knowledge.

Best wishes,

@thematchmakingoffice

…hm…

…sure.

[thematchmakingoffice]

Uh someone told me i could find a girlfriend here

Yeah, just head over to the physical matchmaking office and ask for a form to fill out (we still don’t have the website up sorry).

[thematchmakingoffice]

i’m a bit interested in a tour, what sort of stuff do you usually go over in the tours?

So, we meet up at the lobby. Then we go to the room where the packets are physically made. Then we see do a little history tour of the history of the matchmaking office. Then we see the room where candidates fill out packets. Then we see the room where individual evaluations happen. And finally, we see the statue room. After the tour itself you can go to the gift shop or pick up a matchmaking packet to fill out at home if you so wish.