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threeletterslife · 7 months ago

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OK SOOOOO I MADE A PLAYLIST FOR YOU. like based on ur interests I just thought what songs u would like, but there might be some you don't. You are 100% totally NOTTTTT obliged to listen to all of these they are SIXTY FIVE songs yeah but I put a star (☆) next to the songs that I think you'd like most. I also divided them in like artists, and I wrote my very brief opinion on all the songs. This is just for fun I thought you would like it🤭plss tell me if you alr know any and if you listen to any of them please tell me what you think of themmmm I love reading ur works and I think ur really cool, I hope u like thisss😭

Bts <I'm sure u alr know all of these> :

1) Boy meets evil (J-hope) [so so coool]

2) Rain [one of my favs]

☆3) Tomorrow [OH MY GOD THIS SONGGG IM SO SO SO OBSESSED]

4) Serendipity (Jimin) [one of the best jimin songs if not the best/just amazing]

5) Interlude shadow (Agust D) [love so much]

6) People (Agust D) [one of the first songs I knew by him alone, lyrics are so.. wow/yoongi never fails, he's always been my bias]

7) Mikrokosmos [every army loves this song]

8) 13430 [not that upbeat not that slow,love soooo much]

9) Ddaeng (Rap line) [YESSSS,joon's verse😱]

10) Cypher pt.4 (Rap line) [this is one of the best rap line songs]

11) Pied piper [10/10 song]

12) We on [i've surprisingly recently known abt this song although it's old/always singing this everywhere I go😭]

13) Who (lauv & vocal line) [vocals are omg]

14) My time (Jungkook) [when I heard this for the first time ohhh myyy/the performance tooo😱]

☆15) Stay alive (Jungkook) [FOREVER CRYING DYING WHEN THIS SONG PLAYS OHH MYYY/yoongi produced ofc and jk's voice is so perfect for it too]

Ateez :

☆16) UTOPIA [very upbeat/SO SO GOOD]

17) Deja Vu [very catchy,listened to it a long time ago but still do till now]

18) IT's You (San, Wooyoung, Yeosang) [kinda iconic,I like this trio]

Girl groups/soloists :

☆19) Imaginary Friend - Itzy [one of itzy's best b-sides/I think u'll like this one]

20) Can you hear my heart - LeeHi & Epik High [kinda sad...more than kinda😂love tho]

21) Holy Moly - Ive [slay/i love]

☆22) Impurities- lesserafim [super super catchy I love it]

23) Ditto - new jeans [I think this is the only new jeans song I like😕]

24) Love Wins All - IU [well..I'm speechless]

☆25) Justice - Dreamcatcher [Rock song af/only dreamcatcher song ik, I love it]

26) Supersonic - fromis_9 [upbeatt/the choreo of the chorus!! I love it I do it all the time-im a dancer- the song is greattt]

27) Maria - Hwasa [iconic.]

28) Te queiro - Kiss of Life [fancy/all english/very nice]

29) Gogobebe - mamamoo [vibeyy]

☆30) Crown - Seulgi [LOVE LOVE LOVE/always play it if I'm reading a dramatic or murderous chapter hhaha]

31) 28 reasons - Seulgi [iconic.]

EXO :

☆32) Sweet lies [I have no words. this song is just. you'll get it when you listen]

33) Monster [probably my fav exo song]

34) Tempo [ICONIC]

☆35) Psycho (Baekhyun) [LOVE LOVE also I listen to when I read a crime related chapter]

☆36) Pineapple slice (Baekhyun) [his most recent album's title track/LOVE IT A LOT]

37) Truth be told (Baekhyun) [gets better everytime I listen to it/also in his most recent album]

38) Amusement park (Baekhyun) [THIS SONG IS SO CUTE AND SLOW AND NICE TO LISTEN TO]

Enhypen :

39) Drunk-Dazed [upbeat/iconic]

40) Chaconne [LOVE THIS]

☆41) Criminal love [speechless]

42) I need the light [no cuz this song is just amazing]

43) Fatal trouble [ssoooooo good omg]

44) Given-Taken [their debut song in factttt/the instrumental is sooo]

☆45) Moonstruck [I honestly thing nobody can dislike this song/it's so good like actually]

46) Sacrifice [Yes.]

Seventeen <don't mind my absolute obsession with them> :

47) Maze (The 8) [this is a chinese ost,one of the members sang this/he's my bias fun fact/I really like this song but idk self explanatory I think u'll like it]

48) Cinematic love (Dk & Yang Da Il) [yang da il is not a member btw/ this song is excellent. Dk is one of the strongest vocalists in kpop]

49) Bittersweet (Mingyu & Wonwoo ft.leehi) [I love this song I love it I love it]

☆50) Kidult [CRY DIE SCREAM. yeah this song is so well written. ofc woozi has produced their whole discography/fun fact woozi looks just like yoongi, they had an interview together b4]

51) Super [most streamed svt song,makes sense, it's incredible]

52) Fearless [AHHH I adore]

53) Flower [yes yes yes]

☆54) I Don't Understand But I Luv U [GIRL WHEN I TELL YOU. This song drives me insane]

55) Light a flame [🤭🤭]

56) March [upbeat,super catchy]

☆57) Shadow [LOVE THIS SONG SO SO SO MUCH OHH MYY i scream this song as a daily routine]

☆58) Ready to love [this MAY be their best title track]

Kpop others :

59) Roar - the boyz [upbeat, idk them but I enjoy listening to this song]

60) BTBT - B.I [vibeeeeesssss]

Not kpop :

61) Call on me - Josef Salvat [I literally randomly found this one day and loved it]

62) 505 - Arctic Monkeys [it's good]

☆63) Middle of the night - Elley duhé [Wow wow wow. very book styled song]

64) Tip Toe - HYBS [such a nice song,so vibey and catchy]

☆65) Half of my heart - josh makazo [I love this song. Love it]

ohmYGOD???!?!? My jaw DROPPED when I first saw this. Thank you SO MUCH. I am always looking for new music to listen to, so the fact that you took the time to give me a personalized recommendation list—I am so so SO grateful!!!

BTS RECS

I've listened to every song (solo AND group) that bts has made over the years haha so safe to say I recognized all of the ones on your list! You got my taste pretty spot on, though! Some of those songs are my absolute favorites (i.e. tomorrow, mikrokosmos, ddaeng, pied piper, who, my time). Bonus: stay alive is in my LOD playlist bc I like it THAT much LOL

ATEEZ RECS

Utopia and deja vu have been in my playlist as well! You have fantastic taste bc utopia was literally my summer bop song years ago LMAO. I actually haven't heard of it's you before but GOOD GOD is it fire??? I've added it to my playlist!

GIRL GROUP RECS

I must be deeeep in the girl group trenches bc I actually have ALL of those songs in my playlist EXCEPT justice and supersonic LOL. And what's crazy is a lot of these are my favorite songs too (like holy moly, imaginary friend, impurities, gogobebe, 28 reasons, love wins all I literally listened to on repeat even as recently as in the last few months). Justice is so good wtf I can't believe I didn't know of it before???? Supersonic too???

EXO RECS

Omg. I only knew monster (also one of my fav exo songs) and tempo LOL. I literally ascended into the heavens when I started listening to sweet lies wtf I know EXACTLY what you mean. How did I not know this song existed?? I also didn't know Baekhyun had this many solos. Out of the ones you recced my fav Baekhyun solo is truth be told! It's so ~vibey~ but literally all the others are amazing too??? I feel like I could write a whole story based on pyscho

ENHYPEN RECS

FATAL TROUBLE AND GIVEN-TAKEN ARE IN MY TOP 20 KPOP SONGS OF ALL TIME LOL. I listened to them ON REPEAT the moment they came out. Fatal trouble ended up in my 2024 wrapped too haha. I've added all of the others to my playlist after listening omg. My favorites though are i need the light and chaconne!

SEVENTEEN RECS

Seventeen makes BOPS I cannot lie. I've been listening to kidult, march, and ready to love since my friend who rlly likes them recced them to me! But the ones you recced are ALSO fire. My favorites have to be maze (holy shit this song is like 110% my vibe), i don't understand but i luv u (WHERE HAS THIS SONG BEEN IN MY LIFE?????), and shadow (DITTO. this fucking album is filled with bops wtf)

OTHER KPOP RECS

I've had BTBT in my playlist too bc the vibes are too good to resist. Literally listened to the first five seconds of the boyz and added it to my playlist LMAO

NON-KPOP RECS

That's crazy that the two songs you starred are actually in my favorites playlist. I literally had both in my 2024 wrapped LOL. I listen to the orchestral version of half of my heart more though. WOAH call on me is amazing omg. I also haven't heard of this artist before so I'm gonna check out his discography! Ooh 505 is very calming and tip toe is like 100% my style!

I've added so many great songs to my playlist today thanks to you! I can't appreciate you enough for all the time, dedication, and effort you put into curating this list for me. Hope you have a wonderful rest of your day!! (p.s. you have top-tier taste)

#ask #anon #chana #you did not miss wtf #very impressed #also side note this is the longest ask i've ever gotten #it was so long that when i try to view it on my phone it CLIPS lol??

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threeletterslife · 7 months ago

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40 | Legends of Darlaria

⨰ summary: You wake up in yet another unfamiliar place. This time, however, these strangers seem to recognize you. With your previous judgments and aspirations thrown out the window, you're now forced to face where your loyalties really lie. Who will you betray? And which General will you choose to stand by his side?

⨰ pairing/rating: yoongi x reader & jungkook x reader | PG-15

⨰ genre: 70% angst, 30% fluff | war!au & magic!au

⨰ warnings: profanity, descriptions of death, blood and gore

⨰ wordcount: 3.8k

⨰ join the taglist! (pm/send in an ask/reply/reblog)

⨰ previous | series m.list | next

⧖⧗Many, Many Circas Ago⧗⧖

The world grew eerily silent when you stepped into your office. What was left of daybreak’s red light filtered into the room, bathing it in a bloody hue. Or perhaps the red reflected from Enyx’s flickering flames, his once flamboyant spirit dimmed as he lay limp in his silver cage on your desk.

Your knees skidded across the wood until they were bruised before your desk. Your ears were ringing again, in that high-pitched key that you so often heard when the world seemed to stop spinning. The phoenix looked up, his weary eyes meeting yours in a gentle, understanding gaze.

‘It’s okay,’ he seemed to say.

“It’s not,” you said, lips quivering. “It’s not okay. You’re dying.”

‘But I am a phoenix. You know I will rise again.’

“I know, I know,” you whispered, voice breaking. “But I just…”

‘Do not worry,’ Enyx seemed to say. His eyes drooped, light smoke trailing from the tips of his feathers. ‘We will meet again.’ Even in his dying moments, Enyx was majestic. Bathed in scarlet light, his fiery plumage flickered like dim candlelight on a breezy night. He looked strangely at peace, though your heart was heavy.

“Yes… We’ll… We’ll meet again.”

The phoenix gently closed his eyes and his feathers erupted in one final beacon of light—deep scarlet and golden flames coiled together in the air, reminding you of the Solarian uniform. The flames soon extinguished in a cloud of gray smoke. They wound around your office, drawing an opaque film over your vision. A dry cough crept up your throat as you waved your hands to clear the smoke. When it finally dissipated, you saw Jungkook, leaning against the wall. You hadn’t heard him come in.

“Hey,” he spoke in a soft voice. He glanced at the gray ashes in the silver birdcage and back at you, hunched against your desk. “I’m sorry.”

“He’ll be reborn,” you said, weakly.

Jungkook hummed. “But that’s not all you’re upset about.” He could always read you so well. “Talk to me,” he said. “It’ll help.”

You pushed your hands up to your face and sighed deeply. “It’s stupid.” You didn’t want to cry, but the tears pooled behind your fingers and dripped down your chin.

“It’s not,” he reassured, crouching to your level. “You’re scared,” he observed. “And Enyx’s death only reminds you of what you’ll see out there.” He was right. “But you’ve trained hard for this moment,” Jungkook said. “Don’t forget that.”

You understood him, for you had spent circas rebuilding your muscles, thawing your dormant agility, dueling and masking and running. Yet, why did you feel ill-prepared? It has been six circas since you’ve been free of the deaths, the violence, the sea of red. Six circas without Hajin, too. You had always fought by her side.

And now, now another loved one died in your presence. How many more will you have to live through? Hot tears streamed down your face. They stung your cheeks and tasted salty on your tongue.

“Shh…” Jungkook whispered, placing a warm hand on the small of your back. “You’re overthinking.”

“I-I can’t stop,” you sniffled. “I know I’m overthinking. I know I’m being a coward. I’m overreacting, dammit, but I’m so damn nervous, Jungkook. They’re going to chew me up alive. They’re going to kill our soldiers, and I won’t be able to do anything about it. I won’t be able to save them, just like I couldn’t save Hajin. I’ll be a disgrace to Darlae—just as I have been for the past six circas when I abandoned my own army and pushed all my burdens onto you.”

“Hey, hey,” Jungkook said, pulling you into a tight embrace. “You won’t be a disgrace. No one will chew you up alive. You’ve earned your position with your merit, do you understand?”

“Jungkook, but I…”

“We’re going to win today,” he said, placing a chaste kiss on your lips. “I can feel it.” He cupped your cheek in his gentle hands. So don’t you dare worry, he tapped. All right?

You placed a shaking hand on top of his. All right, you tapped back. You wanted to believe him. You really did. But there was a strange, twisting feeling in your gut that you couldn’t ignore. It was the kind of feeling that urged you to stay home, swaddled in the safe confines of your covers. But how cowardly would that be? And besides, you were never a good divinist. Perhaps this gut feeling was only a ruse your mind conjured up in manifestation of your worst fears. Perhaps Jungkook was right and you were wasting your worries.

“Are you ready?” he asked, standing to his feet and outstretching his hand.

You took it as he pulled you up. “Yeah,” you said. “Yeah, let’s go.”

He nodded. “How’s the speech coming along?”

You twisted your trinket between your fingers. “I’m just about finished, I think.”

“Good. Your soldiers will love it. I’m sure.”

The wooden platform squeaked under your feet. Before you were your army, thousands of soldiers who swore to give their lives to their nation—and you. They looked up at you in awe, with sparkling eyes and brave faces. It took everything in you to meet their gazes, but you longed to look away, to crawl back into your covers. You felt small in the morning light, and as the sunlight rained down on the soldiers, basking them in warmth, you couldn’t help but think this might be some of their last days in this world—the last time some of them would see the sun, feel its glow, see it rise over the horizon.

Your throat suddenly became parched, and you forced yourself to hold in a cough threatening to escape from your lips.

Inside your mind, flashed glimpses of the fallen. Hajin, Joonhee, General Son… Your captain and majors, thousands and thousands of unranked soldiers—those you recognized, those you didn’t. Your head began to spin, and you gripped onto the podium for support. But your soldiers needed you, and you had to show them that you were strong, that you were ready to lead them to victory again. This was your first official speech after your disappearance for six circas, after all.

The sun was blinding you now, and your eyes squinted against the white light. It helped a little, not being able to see your soldiers’ faces. It made it easier to lie.

“My soldiers,” you called out to them in earnest. “I stand before you humbly. I may be bedazzled in medals of honor and validation, and yet even I am not immune to illness. I thank you all for waiting for my recovery. I commend you for fighting in my stead, my courageous soldiers, and I wish I made better haste in my return to health.” The lump in your throat bobbed as you swallowed thickly. “Alas, I have returned to you, stronger than ever, more invigorated than before, and well-prepared to make Darlae proud. But our victories are not without sacrifices. I…” Your breath caught in your throat, your lips aquiver. “I want to take a moment to commemorate the fallen. Let us honor them, let us carry on their legacies as they would have done the same for us. We fight with the weight of those who have fought valiantly before us. When we charge toward the Solarians, we charge for the fallen. They’ve given up their lives for a chance at a warless Darlae, so let us honor their sacrifice and finish what they have so courageously started.”

Your hands twisted the pendant of your trinket. “When I was a little girl, I wanted to become a hero—I’d read one too many books about them—but the dream carried me through my studies, through my time in the Training Corps, and my service in the army thus far. I used to be quite embarrassed about such a dream of which I thought was too fantastical to come true. As I grew older, I realized there is nothing fantastical about being a hero; they are as ubiquitous as rainfall in the spring. My heroes are those who have uplifted me, supported me, have taught me lessons about the world around me I otherwise would never have gleaned. Some of my heroes are still with me,” you said, glancing at Jungkook from the crowd. “Others are long gone… But it does not matter where my heroes are. The memories I made with them, the stories they’ve told me, their hopes and dreams stay with me. They inspire me to become a hero myself, and I use this inspiration to attempt to change Darlae for the better. So let us remain faithful to our loved ones, our nation, our dreams. If we lose someone dear to us in this war, someone who inspired us to fight, let us make them heroes. Let us honor them today, tonight, for many days and nights until we no longer can. And let us rest in peace when our times come, knowing that once we have become grand sacrifices for Darlae, others will do the same for us. Let us trust our comrades to carry on our legacies when we die—as they trust us to do the same. We can die and still become a hero.

“So, my dear soldiers, we must not wallow in fear. Instead, be proud that your contributions will go down in the annals of history, and that your sacrifices won’t be without remembrance. I am willing to put my life on the line for a chance at a warless Darlae. My soldiers, are you?”

A loud roar shook the grounds, and for a split second, you swore you saw the heavens tremble along with it. Your soldiers cheered for you, though you weren’t sure if that was the result of pre-battle adrenaline or genuine agreeance to your message. It didn’t matter that you still felt sick to your stomach when you hid it so well.

“Hey,” Jungkook said. He sat down next to you on a wooden crate, examining your countenance to gauge your thoughts. “It was a great speech.”

“Thanks,” you sighed. “I hope they liked it.”

“They loved it,” he answered. “The reception was overwhelmingly positive.” He paused, cocking his head. “But you’re unhappy.” He was always too good at reading you.

“It’s just…” Another sigh, deeper than the last, left your lips. “It felt like I was lying to them.”

“Hm.”

“It was like I was putting up a strong front while I was in shambles on the inside,” you said. “Is that being dishonest?”

He shook his head. “You were only reassuring them. Nothing wrong with that.” He put a warm hand on your knee. “I won’t tell you not to worry, but I will tell you to internalize what you just told your soldiers. I think you forget sometimes that you’re already a hero, that people die for you. You will never be a disgrace to Darlae, Y/N. You’ve already made history. And yes, those who look up to you will die, but as you’ve said, honor them. You’re allowed to mourn, you’re allowed to grieve, but never let their legacies grow cold.” He squeezed your knee. “In the meantime, I’ll do everything I can to support you. I know your job isn’t easy, but you’ve done so well and will continue to do well. I believe in you.”

Your heart grew warm at his words. You couldn’t help but fling yourself into his arms. His embrace rivaled the passion and glow of a thousand suns. Thank you, you tapped into his shoulder.

Of course, he responded back. Let’s go now. Your army is waiting.

The march to the battlefield was a blur. The morning air was crisp and smarting against your cheeks, and you attempted to distract yourself by watching your breaths float past your lips in gray wisps and disperse into the sunlight. But it wasn’t enough to chase away the heavy feeling in your stomach. That feeling, it seemed, would never go away, no matter Jungkook’s kind words or your soldiers’ reverence. It was the feeling brought upon by the imminence of death—not only yours but also your comrades and loved ones. This gut-wrenching feeling would not disappear for a long time, not at least until the war was over. Yet, how much longer could you handle this? You never thought you were immortal—some of your soldiers do, it’s a survival tactic or instinct, perhaps, that they deploy to fare against the glaring finiteness of their life on the battlefield. Death has always scared you. No, the pain that death can bring. What did Hajin feel when the ring pierced through her head? Did she even feel it? Or was she dead right away? Did she get to savor her last thought? Did she think, as she was falling to the ground, I don’t want to die? Or was she distracting herself from the pain by dreaming of exploring the Blackwoods with a week’s supply of devilled eggs? But perhaps she did not feel much, taking a bullet to the head. But those who do, the soldiers who cry out in agony as they bleed out in the mud spilled with guts and tears, how do they bear it? Do they beg others to put them out of their mercy? If someone begged you to do so, could you do it? Look them in the eyes and watch the light in them fade from your doing? Would you ever beg someone to take your life when the pain is too much? Will that someone be Jungkook? Or will you suffer in silence?

Being in a war made your mortality almost tangible. You could taste death in the air. It lingered on your clothes, in your hair, your mind as well. You could never escape it. And worst of all, every death felt like your fault. You were responsible for each life on the line for it was your formations and your command that these soldiers so vehemently followed. No matter what anyone said, you were responsible for Hajin. And you would also be responsible for anyone who died today on the battlefield.

By the time the whirlwind of your thoughts ceased, you were standing on the battleground. Your army was behind you, your lover right next to you and your enemy in the front—a familiar composition—but you couldn’t remember how you got here. The sun was higher up in the sky now, brighter too, and the brightness obscured your line of vision on the Solarians. From across the land, they looked like fire in their burning red uniforms. It reminded you of Enyx’s flames. The Solarian General was there, leading his army, though as usual, you couldn’t make out his face, which was for the better. It was always better if you never looked them in the eyes.

The ringing in your ears came back. You were frozen in place, watching the sea of red before you. Suddenly, your breaths quickened as if you were losing air. Your hands began to tremble in anticipation. You watched the Solarian General raise his arm and a roaring red flame shoot from his fingertips. You were breathless now.

“Y/N,” an urgent voice called your name, a voice you recognize and love.

Right. Right. You must signal back. That would begin the subsequent onslaught of innocent soldiers on both sides. With trembling hands, you reached down to pick up a small pebble. You felt it between your fingers, savoring its cool smoothness. You hesitated. Were you ready for this? But it didn’t matter if you were. Your soldiers were ready, and they were out for blood. Your nation was counting on you. So, you tossed the pebble in the air, masking it into a purple streak of smoke. Red and violet splashed in the sky.

People began to run. You ran too. Your arms were moving on their own, throwing out charms and dodging fire from every which way. Your legs moved, putting one after the other, but you couldn’t seem to register the movement in your head. Your mind felt foggy. How long have you been doing this? Has it been hours? Your legs are aching. Was the training enough? Will it be over soon? Are you losing focus?

Suddenly the stench of blood hit your nose, along with the insufferable smell of smoke and fire. You clutched your trinket. You’ve been on this battlefield many times, but today, it felt like you wandered onto it for the first time. There was a ringing in your ears that masked the cries of pain, the slashes and the crackling of burning bodies. But that didn’t block your vision. It was all so overwhelming. Your legs slowly ceased to carry you forward.

Your limbs felt weak. Another body thudded on the ground next to you. Shivers crawled up your spine. How many more would this place kill? How many more friends and loved ones would it steal away from you? How could you ever uphold all of their legacies? How could you ever give them the justice that they deserved? You couldn’t. You simply couldn’t. How does fighting in a battle that killed your soldiers honor them? How does it help to continue the cycle of violence and war and death and blood? How was that heroic? You asked your soldiers time and time again to give their lives for the war, but why? Those bright-eyed and eager Darlaeans, why did they waste their lives away, training for death? For Darlae? The same nation that shipped them out for them to burn alive in the mud? A warless Darlae? Impossible. This nation thrived off of war. So much so that it killed its own royalty. Hajin’s face flashed in your mind.

You were afraid. You were so afraid.

You couldn’t stop the treasonous thoughts flying through your head. It was hard to breathe. The world around you was so loud but you only heard silence. The great Darlaean General, reduced to a hyperventilating mess.

It should’ve been Jungkook. It should’ve always been him.

Something hit your head. Hard.

You were falling. There was no time to stop yourself. A sharp pain shot through your head. There was an ear-splitting thump.

Everything hurt. Blood rushed to your brain, but it wasn’t helping you think.

Your body twitched in pain.

It was happening. Your death was imminent.

And you deserved this, didn’t you? You committed treason in your mind already, was there any going back?

Death wasn’t so scary anymore. There was pain, but it was faint, as if it was floating above you, smothering, but not quite suffocating. Your mind was grasping for thoughts, begging for sustenance before it faded from existence. Any minute now, a delighted Solarian would kill you and be honored for the rest of their life for ridding the Darlaeans of their general. But you didn’t deserve that title. You didn’t for circas.

Jungkook. He should have been the General. And he would be now. You couldn’t imagine how he would feel. Happy? No, he surely couldn’t be. He exchanged you for the title. But then again, you were only another pawn in the army. He would move on, albeit be sad. The thought broke you.

I believe in you, he had said. How could you fail him? After all that he’s done for you? You loved him. You loved him so much that it felt like two hands were wringing your heart when you thought of him.

You were ready to die. You could close your eyes now and drift off to dreamland for all of eternity. And yet, your body slowly, desperately began to crawl forward. You didn’t know where you were going. You couldn’t see. Yet, you groveled on. I believe in you. To do what? To be a good leader? A wonderful lover? A hero? To live?

Your arms pleaded at you to stop. Your legs felt numb, but you persisted. Why? Why did you have such a growing, instinctual response to live?

Something warm and wet rolled from your head, down to your lips. It tasted like iron. You felt yourself dip in and out of consciousness.

If you died, would he bring your body back?

You couldn’t bear to know.

So you had to live.

Hot tears spilled from your eyes, and you no longer had the strength to clear them away with your muddy hands.

Then, you heard voices. People. You were saved.

They came closer and closer until your vision bled red. Solarians. They were coming toward you. No. No. You would rather die on the battlefield than be taken and tortured and held hostage for years until you begged and sobbed for mercy.

Your head felt as if it was splitting open. Vomit poured out of your throat.

If they didn’t notice you before, they did now.

You couldn’t die like this. You were only human, though they wouldn’t see you that way. Their deep scarlet uniforms grew closer and closer. The gold ribbons around their waist fluttered with the wind, and mud stained the soft material of the uniforms—cotton, it had to be. How different their uniform was from the rigid, black fabric the Darlaean uniform consisted of. How much more freeing. It was blood red, but it was almost beautiful. It flowed like the natural passage of time, like a bubbling brook down a tall hill. It felt like freedom.

You were floating. In your mind, you were up in the clouds, basking in the warm sunlight. How would their uniform feel against your skin? Would it be as soft and flowy as it looked? You imagined it would feel like being wrapped in soft clouds and colored by the warmth of sunshine. You imagined yourself donning the uniform, wrapping the golden ribbon snugly around your waist, looping it in an elegant knot. It felt so real, the fabric, the gentle cinch to your waist from the ties, the delicate sleeves and supple boots. No longer did you feel constrained in the Darlaean uniform. Instead, you were walking amongst the clouds, painting the sky in red.

How stupid this war was, dividing two nations by fashion, forcing them to wear clothes that announced their alliances.

How stupid it all was…

You were fading.

“Hey! She’s still alive!”

The voices and yelling sounded far away as if you were in a dream. The pain wasn’t all so bad either. There was no panic, only peace. Quietly, gently, you floated into the sky, and you hoped, if you were lucky, that you would land somewhere amongst the clouds.

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⨰ a/n: the long-awaited chapter is now here! so sorry it took so long :') and now, the flashback is officially over!!! (finally LOL)

please consider telling me your thoughts with a comment, an ask or a reblog :) i love hearing readers' impressions/rambles/predictions! if you want to join the taglist, send in a private message, ask, reply to this post or reblog with your request!

#fic reblog #lod #icymi :)

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threeletterslife · 7 months ago

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some questionsss if u wanna answer any!!

1) which year were you born, ur bday too//what's ur sign

2)what are some of ur fav kpop songs in general

3) fav non-kpop songs

3)who do you think is the most talented dancer in kpop and the most talented singer, whos most good looking in kpop

4)opinions on taylor swift

5) fav bts songs you recommend ppl to listen

6) fav school subject & why//ur major if ur in uni

7) cats or dogs//do u have pets

Curious abt ur answers💜

I'll take a stab at all of them!

I'm a Libra! My birthday's Oct. 13th, and I'm happy about it because autumn is my favorite season and October is my favorite month (totally not biased at all lol). September is a close runner-up though

Breaking Down by Ailee, Answer by ATEEZ, Dahlia by (G)I-DLE, So Far Away by SUGA, Jin, Jungkook, Snooze by Agust D

Hmm I don't think I know enough about each individual member's talents in enough groups to give a well-rounded opinion. I will say though that I've always admired Jimin's dance lines. I also think aespa is filled with strong singers—same with EXO. As for looks, which is the most subjective IMO, it's hard to say. Everyone looks great—they're idols for a reason, though I personally think Wonyoung is gorgeous and I totally understand the hype

I'm not a swiftie so I don't know much about Taylor Swift. I listen to a few of her songs (like marjorie and willow), but I'm into rock music and indie artists so her music doesn't usually align with my tastes

I recommend Heartbeat because I think it's CRIMINALLY underrated like why did we collectively forget about the BTS World game??? It ROCKED MY WORLD when it first came out ohmygod. I STILL listen to Dream Glow too. I also usually recommend some of their classics to ease people into kpop such as Spring Day (which is fit for people who like to analyze lyrics and learn about the Sewol Ferry disaster), Best of Me (for people who like more upbeat music), and I NEED U or even RUN because they're just that good

My favorite school subject in high school was biology. I just liked learning about our bodies as well as the environment around us. Right now in college, I study statistics with a concentration in environmental science, policy, and management and also data science with a concentration in economics + sociology. I enjoy math and data, and I respect the world around us and take the environment, equity, and health seriously, so I thought I would combine my interests!

I cannot choose LOL. My friends think I have the personality of a cat, but I have a dog, whom I absolutely ADORE. My boyfriend and I are hoping to get a black cat one day, though. I've always wanted one

#ask #anon #chana #thank you for asking all of these questions! i really enjoyed answering them haha #you really picked my brain here

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threeletterslife · 7 months ago

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I loved this chapter. Finally the flashbacks is overrrrr I can't wait for her to wake up like what will she decide to dooo omg please tell me when youll be able to post the next chapter!!no rush but I'm very exciteddd.updatee on 41 plsss💗

Omg thank you! I still can't believe the flashbacks are over. I swear it feels like I've been writing in past tense since FOREVER. I'm excited to write in the present tense again 😭

I'm working on ch. 41! I really hope to be more proactive in posting/updating :) The original goal was to finish LOD before I graduate; that won't be happening since I only have a semester left BAHA but my revised goal is to finish it in the next year or two

#ask #anon #lod #ch. 41 should come sometime between late jan and mid feb

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threeletterslife · 7 months ago

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Where are you from, are you korean??Also do you like any kpop groups,and if you do who r ur biases in every group??(I love seventeen so so much//and ofc bts forever😭)

Yes, I was born in Korea, but I've lived in the United States for most of my life; so, I identify as Korean-American

I don't think I'm as involved in kpop fandoms anymore, but I do listen to Korean music all the time. Some groups I find myself listening to often and the members I recognize/admire/stand out the most to me: bts (yoongi but everybody knew that already LOL), gidle (minnie/yuqi/soyeon), le serrafim (yunjin), aespa (ningning), ive (rei), newjeans (haerin)

#ask #anon #i disproportionately listen to girl groups LMAO #i also LOVE korean solo artists #i usually listen to younha yena iu sunmi

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threeletterslife · 7 months ago

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Your way with words blows my mind every single time, sometimes I can see the scene soo clearly in my head. The Storytelling and the detail? Seriously impressive😭, it’s so immersive and I want you to know how well you’re doing !! It’s the only fic I come back to and wait for !! Absolutely well done, I’m excited to see the next chapter 🫶 I wonder when this war will end though, they gotta be getting tired right?? 💀 sort of feels like they’re getting nowhere and now that Y/N’s seen both sides👀👀 very curiousssssssss oooouuu

Ahh thank you so much! This is so heart-warming to hear :) I haven't been feeling the best about my writing for a year now, but this reassures me. I held onto chapter 40 for so long (the final edits I made over the past week were MONUMENTAL LOL), and I'm glad I did because the result is pretty satisfactory. Your questions will be answered in due time, don't worry! Act II closes up in ten chapters, and I'm excited to start writing in a new tone for act III :D

#ask #annapanman3 #lod

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threeletterslife · 7 months ago

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40 | Legends of Darlaria

⨰ pairing/rating: yoongi x reader & jungkook x reader | PG-15

⨰ genre: 70% angst, 30% fluff | war!au & magic!au

⨰ warnings: profanity, descriptions of death, blood and gore

⨰ wordcount: 3.8k

⨰ join the taglist! (pm/send in an ask/reply/reblog)

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⧖⧗Many, Many Circas Ago⧗⧖

‘It’s okay,’ he seemed to say.

“It’s not,” you said, lips quivering. “It’s not okay. You’re dying.”

‘But I am a phoenix. You know I will rise again.’

“I know, I know,” you whispered, voice breaking. “But I just…”

“Yes… We’ll… We’ll meet again.”

“Hey,” he spoke in a soft voice. He glanced at the gray ashes in the silver birdcage and back at you, hunched against your desk. “I’m sorry.”

“He’ll be reborn,” you said, weakly.

Jungkook hummed. “But that’s not all you’re upset about.” He could always read you so well. “Talk to me,” he said. “It’ll help.”

You pushed your hands up to your face and sighed deeply. “It’s stupid.” You didn’t want to cry, but the tears pooled behind your fingers and dripped down your chin.

And now, now another loved one died in your presence. How many more will you have to live through? Hot tears streamed down your face. They stung your cheeks and tasted salty on your tongue.

“Shh…” Jungkook whispered, placing a warm hand on the small of your back. “You’re overthinking.”

“Hey, hey,” Jungkook said, pulling you into a tight embrace. “You won’t be a disgrace. No one will chew you up alive. You’ve earned your position with your merit, do you understand?”

“Jungkook, but I…”

“We’re going to win today,” he said, placing a chaste kiss on your lips. “I can feel it.” He cupped your cheek in his gentle hands. So don’t you dare worry, he tapped. All right?

“Are you ready?” he asked, standing to his feet and outstretching his hand.

You took it as he pulled you up. “Yeah,” you said. “Yeah, let’s go.”

He nodded. “How’s the speech coming along?”

You twisted your trinket between your fingers. “I’m just about finished, I think.”

“Good. Your soldiers will love it. I’m sure.”

Your throat suddenly became parched, and you forced yourself to hold in a cough threatening to escape from your lips.

The sun was blinding you now, and your eyes squinted against the white light. It helped a little, not being able to see your soldiers’ faces. It made it easier to lie.

“Hey,” Jungkook said. He sat down next to you on a wooden crate, examining your countenance to gauge your thoughts. “It was a great speech.”

“Thanks,” you sighed. “I hope they liked it.”

“They loved it,” he answered. “The reception was overwhelmingly positive.” He paused, cocking his head. “But you’re unhappy.” He was always too good at reading you.

“It’s just…” Another sigh, deeper than the last, left your lips. “It felt like I was lying to them.”

“Hm.”

“It was like I was putting up a strong front while I was in shambles on the inside,” you said. “Is that being dishonest?”

Your heart grew warm at his words. You couldn’t help but fling yourself into his arms. His embrace rivaled the passion and glow of a thousand suns. Thank you, you tapped into his shoulder.

Of course, he responded back. Let’s go now. Your army is waiting.

“Y/N,” an urgent voice called your name, a voice you recognize and love.

You were afraid. You were so afraid.

It should’ve been Jungkook. It should’ve always been him.

Something hit your head. Hard.

You were falling. There was no time to stop yourself. A sharp pain shot through your head. There was an ear-splitting thump.

Everything hurt. Blood rushed to your brain, but it wasn’t helping you think.

Your body twitched in pain.

It was happening. Your death was imminent.

And you deserved this, didn’t you? You committed treason in your mind already, was there any going back?

Your arms pleaded at you to stop. Your legs felt numb, but you persisted. Why? Why did you have such a growing, instinctual response to live?

Something warm and wet rolled from your head, down to your lips. It tasted like iron. You felt yourself dip in and out of consciousness.

If you died, would he bring your body back?

You couldn’t bear to know.

So you had to live.

Hot tears spilled from your eyes, and you no longer had the strength to clear them away with your muddy hands.

Then, you heard voices. People. You were saved.

Your head felt as if it was splitting open. Vomit poured out of your throat.

If they didn’t notice you before, they did now.

How stupid this war was, dividing two nations by fashion, forcing them to wear clothes that announced their alliances.

How stupid it all was…

You were fading.

“Hey! She’s still alive!”

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⨰ a/n: the long-awaited chapter is now here! so sorry it took so long :') and now, the flashback is officially over!!! (finally LOL)

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