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Warm enough to go do my favorite walk, but not warm enough to stand in the water although I tried. #nofilterneeded #lighthousewalk #gotmystepsin #RobertMosesBeach #memyselfandi #privetdevotchka (at Robert Moses Field 5) https://www.instagram.com/p/BvaFR70AuDc/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1j86sd5ucsx81

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So chugged some hard ice tea and my dad was watching a werewolf movie downstairs so I came up with a poem because the guy wouldn't shoot his girlfriend and ended up dying. #privetdevotchka #AlwaysDoubleTap #happythanksgivng #youcantsitwithus https://www.instagram.com/p/BqdzR7wgkur/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1ll3vhvogbf39

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"A miserable, mean goddamn bitch. I always have been" -Fiona Goode, former Supreme https://www.instagram.com/p/BpvnSk5gkXv/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1l5kbb5apqu9f

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"Why are you dressed like someone died?" "Wait." #wednesdayaddams #addamsfamily #halloween #drag #youcantsitwithus #privetdevotchka https://www.instagram.com/p/Bpdfuj_AYJ7/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=vq04w6pl0zp9

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So long post: I remember sitting on the toilet in like 4th or 5th grade. I had always known I liked boys but I had a word for it that year and it was gay. It was the first time I said it out loud, "I'm gay." It was nice having a word to explain the difference between me and the other kids. Then in 6thgrade my mom asked me of I liked boys or girls because she was tired of waiting. She had known since I was 4 but has never treated me any different. A couple years ago though I had another struggle. And it was more difficult because I had not shared it with anyone. I was struggling with coming to terms with my gender identity. My self image in my head has never matched my physical self. But saying it out loud felt monumental. Unfortunately it was to an ex who understood but didnt seem to care either way. Even still I told more and more people and it help me decide to keeps everything I was born with and find new ways to Express those parts of my inner truth or whatever everyone calls it now. Lol Now here I am 26 almost 16 years self actualized 14 years out and 3 years working on being comfortable with all of it. Thanks to many people; friends, family, therapists, ex-lovers, ect. Putting up with me is not easy but for those of you that stuck around I am eternally grateful. Love and serenity to all. #nationalcomingoutday #gaypride #lgbt #genderfluid #privetdevotchka #youcantsitwithus #gayaf https://www.instagram.com/p/Boz7MCdHsT5/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=lww6bxtjybah

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It's the holy day and its mid week. #onwednesdayswewearpink #youcantsitwithus #plastics #yougoglencoco #october3rd #privetdevotchka https://www.instagram.com/p/BoedXGUnf6f/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1jus9lcxyg8eh

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#rupaulsdragrace #nycdragcon https://www.instagram.com/p/BoX8NapnQzn/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=x69b0i10yxt1

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Never have I had my anger and social anxiety confused so many times. Lolol travelling as Loss Bean Moo and Su was definitely an experience and eventually well tear up the rest of the country but for now just the finger lakes. https://www.instagram.com/p/BnXi1eAFto4/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=ssj1njusjgrn

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Common knowledge amongst the community. #grindr #menaretrash #privetdevotchka @best_of_grindr

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This loneliness sits like a brick on my chest with the weight of the texts you’ll never send back.

All these people, all alone // Mt

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Pulling up to steal your bitch. #mrstealyourgirl #privetdevotchka #youcantsitwithus #targetlife

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Eventually we all die. It's a thought that runs through my mind at least twice an hour if left unattended by other things. It the same mind demon that had kept me up for years. I've constantly struggled with my faith in anything. That is til I met you. Literally the moment i met you I knew you were the one. ( You can ask kise because I screamed at his wife the night we met cause she said you were bad news, and maybe you were). There is something about you that made me not scared or anxious which honestly I have a hard time handling because I'm almost always one or the other. Every other emotion comes out as a form of passive aggression because I truly and honestly don't know how to process emotions. You calmed so many of those fleeting moments. I know you choose not to remember but that time you said I love you to me and my stomach flipped and you wouldn't let me out of the car until I said it back after seeing Maleficent still just playa in my mind and I wish I just said it back immediately. Because I always new I did. Everything went bad again and the thoughts came back and you started to not be there anymore. I lashed out because you were still the one that made them go away but you didn't want to be around me. Forward to this day almost 4.5 years late from when we met. I'm still here finding it just as difficult as day 1 to move on. Time is supposed to heal this shit but here I am just as broken hearted. Not only does every man not treat me like you do. But none of them scare the fear away like you did the first time i saw you on the faf or the first time we talked at the green turtle. You definitely don't want to read this now but I'm alone and the thoughts are bad and if I message you it'll only come out as I miss you. To which you'll say it back and the conversation will end. Idk. I'm sorry.

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I swear I don't have a problem I just like the smell of bananas.... and for everything to match. #privetdevotchka #sunbum #sunbumhair #sunbumsunscreen #sunbum4life #babybum #youcantsitwithus #addicted

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Susie vs. Angelica Airdate May 2, 1993

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Shark finning infographic by ripetungi.