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westernportcluster-blog · 8 years ago

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Secondary Schools Transition Students But We Forget The Parents…

Anne-Marie Houlihan October 2017

My first confession is that I sent my daughter to the secondary school where I was sleeping with that school's principal. Now that I have your interest, I will declare that he is the father of my child and lucky enough to be married to me...not confusing at all. Going to secondary school for us was seriously a family affair.

For parents, sending a first child to school is a completely new experience. Like all facets of parenting, children do not come with any instructional manual and so the adventure continues.

Enrolment information started for us at Year 5 and lots of relevant information accompanied the enrolment form. As an educator, I was quite comfortable and familiar with the process but it felt the very different wearing a parent hat. Here I go again, but this was my little girl and we were about to take a huge step up the education ladder and as a parent I hadn't experienced this before.

We filled in the forms and the process began. Next, we then attended an interview at the College and that interview was the first formal interaction between the College and my family. Most enrolment interviews would focus on the child, asking what they like about school and other things they enjoy in their spare time. Parents are asked why they are enrolling in the school and the the interviewing staff member gets to share the commitment to the school philosophy and answer any questions. These interviews were completed for most applicants at Grade 5 and we were notified of the success of our application later that year.

We received confirmation that our child was accepted and the new journey with our secondary school began. Whilst we knew our child was accepted into secondary school and even with all the knowledge we had about the school, it felt that like we entered a period of limbo...Sometimes I felt that I should be doing more toward getting my child and myself ready for secondary school, yet I felt I have no idea what to do in this space. Maybe I'm just weird but I wanted to form a connection with my secondary school and felt it was an important part of our transition. It wasn't just about our daughter and I also believe it is the school's responsibility to take the lead in that.

Presently the buzz word with schools is working in partnership with families. Partnership means working together. It implies an equal and respected relationship for the purpose of profit. In the case of a school, the profit comes through the benefit to the child(ren). It is clear that If secondary schools are committed to working in partnership with families then this should begin from the first interaction that the family has with the school and build from there. Schools need to walk their talk...

The time from when a child is accepted to the secondary school until the time that child starts Year 7 offers a great opportunity for the school to bring new parents together and start conversations about getting your child and family ready for secondary school...offering transition through partnership. Parents at this point are very curious, nervous and eager to the right thing and schools should use this time to build relationships with parents. Strike while the iron is hot...

Suggested Strategies to transition parents include:

Bringing the students from local primary schools together for a fun day at the secondary school. The day could focus on a scavenger hunt, team building fun games, followed by a sausage sizzle. The parents could benefit from coming on this day too and they can gather to hear information on strategies for transition that they could be focussing on in their home right now. Parents would appreciate meeting other parents, some teachers from their child's new school and taking a tour themselves. Children experience at first hand their school working with their family.

Offering regular opportunities for school tours and parents should be encouraged to bring their child and attend more than once. Perhaps these tours could specifically focus on new families to the school and showcase learning in the classroom happening for present Year 7 students. The more you are familiar with what subjects your child will be learning and the layout of the school the easier the first week and beyond of secondary school will be for all your family.

Many secondary schools send some of their students to local primary schools to talk to groups of Year 5 and 6 students about their experience of leaving primary school and starting high school. Why not send some Year 7 parents who have just experienced this transition themselves? Often these students that go to the primary schools were former students themselves, and how easy would it be to send former parents to that school too? I also like the idea of parents gathering in the primary school as part of the transition to secondary school. Same concept and great benefits and again demonstrates the experience of transition.

Create a parent friendly “For the Fridge” laminated poster and include the school times, school phone number, email contact, what day the newsletter comes out, name of the Facebook page, absentee line and photos of around 6 key staff members at that school with their name and what they do. Like a beginner's survival guide…on the back, outline the various uniforms required for sport day, summer uniform and winter uniform. Keep it simple and keep it visible. Schools seek parental support for uniform, turning up on time and many other house-keeping facets. Show parents that you want to work with families by supporting them in doing this for their children. These types of resources will prove to be invaluable in the first few weeks of schools as parents navigate a new and very different school.

Parents learn from other parents and opportunities to gather in the years leading up to secondary school should be embraced. Secondary schools often have large school productions, art shows, displays of student work, liturgies and other community activities whereby new parents can start to experience the school in action. Extend invitations to school events to present and future families.

Encourage present parents to write a ‘parent survival’ manual. Whilst school staff take new groups of students and parents through transition every year, the parent journey is extremely different to this.They are parents, not teachers and knowledge you take for granted is often the knowledge that parents don't know.

Offer some small workshops to new parents and address such topics as how to get your child organised for secondary school, technology and cyber safety, what to expect on the first day of Year 7, how to set up an iPad, loading IBooks, accessing and using the school Parent Assistance Program where they can monitor their child's learning. Make sure these workshops are offered at times when parents can access them.

The secondary school needs to be proactive. A partnership school would talk to parents and ask them what services and strategies they want. Let’s take a moment to consider this...schools asking parents what they want and not telling them what they need. A partnership school needs to be outward facing and recognise the value that parents bring to the educational table.

Look at creating a family mentor program where new families to the school are teamed up with another family at the school. The purpose of the connection is to allow a new family to seek support and advice from a family that have already travelled the path of transition. In matching families, the commitment doesn't have to be onerous but rather a gesture of a current family at the school reaching out to help another. Sometimes a new parent just needs a quick question answered or some advice...a phone call, a text or an email would be greatly appreciated.

Host a new parent dinner or a couple of them. Present Year 7 and 8 parents could cook or serve the meal to the new Year 7 parents. Build a culture of ritual and within a short period of time the new parents coming through will appreciate what was offered and they will step up to welcome the next group to the college. Great opportunity for all concerned to meet, chat and establish some relationships.

Outline and articulate to parents clearly what the program for the first day of school for both the students and the parents. Parents don't “just happen to know” how to behave or be visible in a secondary school and they need to be led through this process. Most parents if given suitable notice will arrange time off to be there. They want to be there.

Staff, if you're still not convinced I will challenge you to answer the following:

What's the easiest and best way to take up a blazer sleeve?

How do you set up an iPad?

Do you know that to have an iTunes account you need to be 13 and most children starting secondary school are not yet 13?

Do you know how to deal with a second hand text book and what to do with the eBook?

Parents journey a different path of transition to secondary school and schools need to recognise that. There are so many variations and ideas for parent transition and there needs to be opportunity to share information and questions. This list is aimed at starting the thinking and the conversation. Whilst schools think they have it covered, I would urge them to consider being on the other side of the relationship. My husband and I were, and even we struggled. It was a huge learning curve for us in transitioning our child to secondary school and quite a defining moment for me. If the principal and his wife can feel lost at some stages of the process at times then schools need to help the rest of us …

Anne-Marie Houlihan currently leads a Family School Partnership. Parent Engagement is the focus of her work and along with her experiences of education from a variety of roles including a secondary classroom teacher, a Year co-ordinator, leading vocational educational community programs, working with Youth at Risk, Enrolments and Marketing and a mother’s experience of schools, there seems to be a wealth of experience of 30 years experience to draw from.

The Western Port Cluster has a Facebook page. Click here:

#secondary #high school #relationships #teacher #parents #parent engagement #students #transition

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westernportcluster-blog · 8 years ago

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Schools Need Boundary Umpires:

Anne-Marie Houlihan September 2017

If you go to a footy game, all the play is meant to take place within a 10cm white line that encircles the entire oval. It is clearly marked and players, coaches and spectators have clear expectations of how it should work. If the play comes close to that line or goes over, then an umpire blows their whistle and calls out of bounds. At this point, I am recommending this type of approach for parents, classrooms and schools.

So many times in life there are rules and we are expected to follow them … except for some. For reasons unknown, except to themselves, these people have decided to be exempt or in short decided that “that rule doesn't apply to me.” Are you one of those parents? I'm not sure if you will want to read on but for the rest of us, we sure hope you do.

We have talked about partnership schools and working in an equal and respectful way with your school and your child(ren)s’ teachers and BAM … there's that word and that phrase … respectful and working with. Teachers have an enormous workload, huge responsibility and the need for their day to run according to a plan. In the primary school setting, most schools will encourage and welcome you into the school with your children at drop-off and pick up. Daily rituals of dropping the child to their classroom, coming in and saying hello to other students, parents and the teacher are great opportunities for relationship-forming and information-giving but remember, there are boundaries.

To the parent whose toddler ruins the reading corner most mornings of the week, to the children who run around the classroom in the presence of parents when you should be with them running around outside, to the parent who simply must speak with the teacher even though the school day has begun, and my personal favourite, when the teacher says no one is to be in the classroom before 8:15 and a parent takes it upon themselves to “supervise” a group of students in there from 8 because it's cold … seriously I would like to be there with my whistle and yell out of bounds very, very loudly and with my arm fully extended upward stretched as far as it can go.

It's been awhile since I had a toddler but I do remember what that's like and I certainly don't like being cold but no excuses please. If you simply respected those rules and boundaries then these incidents and so many more wouldn't happen. Please step out of your bubble that states that the world revolves around you and your child … it shouldn't and it doesn't. It honestly will be beneficial for them, the teacher and the other families in your child's class if you do. Keep all of them in play and not let any go out of bounds.

Just as in your home you may have multiple children that you actually gave birth to, I'm certain you have rules and boundaries that they are required to follow. To those parents who don't believe in boundaries at home then good luck with that one. You will need more than this column to sort yourselves out in years to come.

Why boundaries? Because boundaries are an essential building block of life. We need to set them and follow them in our homes and we need that approach to extend to the wider world. In this case the most significant other place that children go in the world would be to school. As parents we need to respect and follow the boundaries that our schools set and whilst you may not see a reason then that's not an acceptable reason to not follow them.

It seems like I have my grumpy pants on today (or maybe my boundary umpire’s uniform!) but I am frustrated and saddened because not following boundaries in schools leads to bigger and more reinforced poor behaviours. It is also producing generations of huge proportions of entitlement. Try that in the workplace or the real world and see how far you get.

Let’s now move to the secondary school. Boundaries there are equally important and present but different to primary schools. If you have a no-respect parent approach then your poor behaviour continues and you are building young adults with the same poor behaviour as yourself. We talk about supporting a school and at enrolment most parents are all for that. Then the wheels get a bit shaky and suddenly you're back to your habit of not supporting your school but expecting your school to revolve around you.

I believe one of the greatest complicating factors in secondary schools is children with phones and a direct line to their parents, most usually their mother. This needs another article at least of my thoughts on phones and this point I'm sticking to respecting boundaries. Here are some examples for you:

The parent’s child rings the school to complain about the unfair treatment or test result given to their child and the child is still walking over to the office to discuss the behaviour in question with the staff member receiving the call.

A child rings home sick and just arranges for mum to collect them.

Sport days like cross country, swimming carnivals or celebration days have extraordinary rates of absenteeism due to parental approval.

Requesting a change in teacher for your child because you've heard they're not very good.

Phone calls to the school requesting to collect their child because they are not doing anything exciting …

Parents lying for their child.

So many, many more ...

Whilst some of these may seem justified in the parent's mind I would again use my boundary umpire analogy and call all of them as being out-of-bounds with a very loud blow of my whistle. Children learn what they live and demonstrating poor boundaries only reinforces this behaviour as acceptable to our children. Respect is a major component and a lack of respect is a major problem.

All parents at some stage will make an inappropriate judgement and as parents I reiterate we are not perfect. It is the serial offenders that I am blowing my whistle on today. I often wonder if these parents received the same enrolment form as me. I signed and agreed to the terms and conditions of the school I chose as a complete package. I never saw it as a multiple choice option and I am certain my school doesn't offer that.

I am now wondering if these parents turned the page and ticked boxes based on their choice … maybe these boxes were not visible to me. I'm hoping that in the future that working in partnership with parents throughout the school journey will make these boxes invisible to all our families in our schools.

The Western Port Cluster has a Facebook page. Click here:

#secondary #primary school #teacher #parent engagement #parent

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westernportcluster-blog · 8 years ago

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From Conception to Classroom:

By Anne-Marie Houlihan

September 2017

In 2001, I gave birth to a beautiful daughter. Whilst pregnancy gives most mothers around 9 months of the extraordinary experience of a small being living in your body, it does not in any way prepare you for the birth of a child and,in that instant, the realisation that this little child is yours. I can honestly say that nothing can prepare you for those first moments of seeing your child for the first time, hearing them cry, touching them, holding them and being there. It is an amazing and terrifying moment rolled into one, served with a very large dose of feeling absolutely stunned.

The saying from Osho “The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new." resonates with me and with no experience and a heart filled with love and “L” plates, we took our daughter home and started the journey of parenthood. No instruction book was included but a mother’s and father's love and a few essentials kick-start you off. So many experiences with that child build (and in early times, day merges with night) and suddenly fast-forward five years and I find myself holding that little hand and I'm at the school gate.

I absolutely dreaded sending her to school. Both my husband and I have strong backgrounds in education and that did nothing to prepare me or make me feel any better. As a parent, it was a completely different and unrelated experience to being on the other side of the educating table. Both of us had secondary school experience and it’s interesting to note that primary schools operate completely differently to secondary schools. You see this one was MY child and she had been my shadow, my apprentice, my company and so much more for five years. To this point I had taught her pretty much all she knew yet suddenly I am required to put her in a school uniform, pack a lunch and act cheery about the whole damn process … and hand her over and act happy about it.

We had chosen our local parish primary school and for us there was no other choice. As Catholics we wanted her to go to a school where the values and beliefs in our home would be those she learnt and experienced at school. My husband and I had both many years previously undertaken our own primary education in our local parish catholic primary schools, his in country Victoria and mine in Perth.

I felt devastated and really felt like I was being forced to hand my child over. You might have guessed by now I didn't want to. I will also reiterate this is not the same feeling for all parents but this is my version. At this point some might ask why didn't I home school her if I felt like this but I knew in my heart I wanted to be her mother but not her everyday teacher. The strength of the inner mother's voice … if only we trusted it more.

The teacher seemed pleasant and competent enough but she didn't know our daughter like I did. She didn't know what made her laugh, she didn't know what frightened her and the teacher didn't know what she was good at and what she struggled with.

A couple of weeks into the school term, I remember telling the lady in the front office who happened to have three sons, that I would like to forward a photo of my daughter and could she place it alongside the children with allergies and other medical conditions? When she asked me why and what was her medical condition I had to explain that my child had never spilled blood. That’s right, she had never really fallen over and scraped her knee or a toe or an elbow and seriously seen blood.

You see, this is my point for knowing my child as I had developed her being an extremely careful and gentle child. She still is and she never undertook physically challenging experiences unless she knew that she would achieve them without pain or injury. Whilst you might argue that this wouldn't have had a great impact on her school experience this sort of knowledge given by parents needs to be welcomed, sourced and acknowledged. I think it is invaluable and would certainly help a child's success. Research backs this completely.

Maybe I was able to share some of my parent knowledge and the lady in the office always remembered me and would ask had my daughter spilled blood yet and my response until around Grade 5 was no, not yet. When she did spill blood in Grade 5, I was extremely grateful to those same ladies who helped my daughter and me!

Fast-forward ten years and I found myself being appointed to the position of leading a Family School Partnership. Parent Engagement was about to enter my life as a new concept and when I heard the message it was truly a significant light bulb moment for me. Yes, I bring skills and experience to this job through education and community roles that I have worked in but of greatest joy was recognising that this is who I am, what I practice and I was given the most extraordinary opportunity to share this knowledge with others. I truly won the jackpot and I still look back at the moment of enlightenment or some might say when the beast was unleashed.

Here it is … the following statement was presented as a slide. “The purpose of a school is to help a family educate a child.” Don Edgar - Sociologist

I found this personally to be a profound statement because it changed my view toward schooling. As a parent, I was in the driver's seat and the school was working with my child and family. I was my child’s first teacher and our home was my child’s first school.

The effect on me was so empowering. I was under the wrong assumption where I felt that the school had control of my daughter’s education and they would call me when they needed me. This is not what schools should be doing. Parental empowerment and understanding our role in walking alongside teachers in educating our children together changes the playing field enormously in my eyes. It also brings great results for our kids. Forty years of research supports this and that should be enough to convince us to try and give it a go.

Ther challenge that presents us with is ‘how do we share this message to other parents?’ but of greater challenge is ‘how do we convince schools of this?’

Slowly and through education is the key. Education brings change and it is time we spread the word to parents and to schools about valuing the parental knowledge and working with our childrens’ teachers to make the most of that knowledge on their learning.

When a teacher and a parent work together for the purpose of educating a child then parent engagement takes place. Parent engagement in a child's learning is key to the benefits for that child. We need to start on the same page and parents and teachers want what is best for a child … let’s start walking that journey alongside each other.

The Western Port Cluster has a Facebook page. Click here:

#secondary #primary school #parenting #parent engagement #children #teacher #teaching & learning

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westernportcluster-blog · 8 years ago

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Confessions of a Classroom Helper:

August 2017 Anne-Marie Houlihan

My daughter had started Prep and I decided I wanted to be a classroom helper...because that’s what school mums do. I don’t actually know who said that but I look back and see almost a well-worn path of ritual from others who had walked the path before me. I truly believe there is also a great deal of brainwashing and pressure for what is expected as a first time school mum and we, as new parents to the school, are very eager to do the right thing.

Please don't get me wrong, the decisions that our schools make and programs that they implement I have no doubt, are planned for the benefit of the school and the child. It is only now with my new eyeballs of wanting to work in partnership with my school that I am saddened by the fact that the parental input was fairly fixed and not considered with a different approach in these school decisions and programs.

As a qualified secondary teacher amongst other things, I soon discovered that no recognition of prior learning (RPL) was offered for the compulsory attendance of three blocks of two hours of each tuition in learning the intricacies and skills for being a parent helper in the prep classroom and yes, a Prep classroom is very different to a secondary Maths class! I had already mastered fruit cutting at kinder and felt more than ready to take on my new challenge...crikey, I had worked with Youth at Risk and taught classes of Mathematics to large groups of teenagers on a Friday afternoon...surely Preps couldn't be as entertaining or challenging as that.

Anyway, as a new ready-to-please parent I attended the training dutifully, received a certificate for my efforts and ten years on I cannot remember a damn thing about that training. With relief, I do remember that I was deemed suitable to enter the Prep domain and I spent most of my classroom helping-time returning kids’ readers and signing out new books in the corridor outside the classroom. Whilst this would have been a very helpful job to the teacher I don’t recall ever actually helping the children with their work that much. I remember that we had to be confidential about the children and I don't think I had to be confidential about the experience or otherwise I am now in trouble…

Being a parent helper is, of course, so much more than signing out books and there are heaps of benefits. Your child absolutely loves you being in their classroom and I am sorry to tell you but that's going to change in a few years so take full advantage while you can.

Here are some of the Benefits:

Get to see your child in the classroom context and see how they interact with others and get on with their work. Some parents will struggle to recognise their own child who could be an absolute angel in class and not so at home...as a parent you watch and you learn. Classroom helpers watch the children and see the teacher interact with each of them and as a class. Seeing particular strategies that the teacher uses is great for your own learning and you can repeat the same strategy at home with your child. Consistency in approach is a great benefit to children's learning.

Feel like you are making a positive contribution to your school community. Schools are very grateful as they rely on parent volunteers to help run many activities in schools. Helping out gives you a good feeling and you are modelling some great behaviour for your child. Talking about how we help others is a conversation, seeing you help others is a life lesson.

Get to know the other children in your child's class. Learn names and get to know some personalities. When your child speaks of some of their classmates you will be able to be more involved in the conversation and share a better connection. You may also have gained insightful information and consider yourself prepared.

By coming into the school regularly it builds your relationship with the school and makes you more known with teachers, office staff, the students and other parents. This is an easy way to build relationships and for the shy or reluctant parent and this method can prove to be a lot more comfortable. It builds routine and acceptance. Perhaps if you have a problem with the teacher, this experience will give you the confidence to approach them and have a conversation.

Meet new parents and parents of other students in your child's class. This is so important because you, as a school parent, need to form relationships with other school parents. You will have many things in common and not just your children. Friendships are made in those early school days and, as a parent, I have made some lifelong friends.

Many of us are still friends and as our children grow and they change, as parents we recognise we need all the support we can get especially as our children go through these teenage years. There is no greater satisfaction to a parent then when your child comes home and wants to do something and your answer is no and they respond with “Oh mum, EVERYBODY else is doing it!” Take a breath, walk to your phone and know that you have a selection of mothers you can call to verify this fully knowing what their answer will be...a most satisfying parent moment and one to be cherished always… Remember, alone we are strong but together we are stronger.

Looking to the future:

When I reflect on my own experience as a classroom helper, so much literature now points to what learning the parents or helpers could bring to today's classroom of learners. What about the parent who plays the guitar and could teach the children a song? The mother who is great at beading doing a small activity with the children, or the father who loves building lego creations and so much more. This type of learning brings greater impact to our little scholars and in a world where they need to be problem solvers, creative and inventive, resilient and adaptable, to name a few of the life-skills they will need for their future, this seems so more relevant. Schools need to consider how they can tap into this varied and enormous resource.

Again the challenge is how do we bring about this change in today's school? Teachers and school administrators are buried in so much work and are we asking them for more? I say not more but different. Leadership in schools need to believe in the value of parents bringing skills to classroom learning and see them as friends not foes and then look at leading the staff and parents together on this journey. If and only if, this is explored together, then I would be truly excited for the outcome.

There is no greater strength than a group wanting to bring change for a shared cause...especially when that cause focuses on educational opportunities and outcomes for our children. The conversation begins with trust and mutual respect for what each party brings to the table. These conversations need to be initiated by the school and schools need not be frightened of what comes from the conversation but rather welcome it, embrace it and deal with it. If teachers and parents are walking the journey together then a negotiated model is one that evolves. This model is more likely to be owned by parents and schools if they have worked on it together with a shared vision. It builds capacity and community….and its greatest benefit is to our children.

The Western Port Cluster has a Facebook page. Click here:

#secondary #primary school #parents #teachers #school #teacher #parent engagement

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westernportcluster-blog · 8 years ago

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Fact, Faith and Fiction: Enrolling in a Catholic School

Anne-Marie Houlihan August 2017

Catholic schools are currently one of three types of formal schooling systems available to families here in Australia. For today's blog, I want to explore the reasons why people choose Catholic schools, how Catholic schools enrol and what it means to go to a Catholic school.

From my own experience, I am a Catholic , married to a Catholic and as often asked by various people and possibly some of you, yes we do believe all that stuff... Catholics and Church today offers a variety of options to believers and for many of us who were raised in Catholic families and attended Catholic schools and in believing that stuff, we wanted our child(ren) to attend a Catholic school. My husband and I also had a long association with working in Catholic secondary schools too so apart from feeling at times like the Flanders family from the Simpsons there wasn't a decision to be made...it was part of our DNA that our child would attend Catholic schools. The parish primary school was our natural choice and we enrolled.

This school is determined by where we live and by our address we are automatically part of a parish region. This region will generally have its own parish primary school and it seems interesting that when I reflect on this, we didn't seek information pertaining to specialist programs that the school offered, the educational goals or learning styles, class sizes, support staff or even the cost of fees. It was truly that simple. We went for a tour but that was more for our child's benefit and we watched on and learnt a little about our child's school. Decision made.

This may seem very strange for some to process, but I will point out that central to our decision was this...we wanted a school that shared the same teachings and values as our family. We wanted a school that supported rituals of church, and celebrated and taught children through prayer, liturgy and Religious Education classes. We wanted to walk a journey of faith with our child together. In this regard our child's education was a shared journey with us as a family. Again, decision made.

Now this is not the only reason children go to Catholic schools and after seeing Catholic schools in action for many years and talking to parents and students I am well aware of many of the other reasons why parents choose Catholic schools. Let's explore some of these.

Caring:

Catholic schools have a strong and proven reputation for caring for their students and families. They are known for having comprehensive pastoral care programs based on values of respect, caring and compassion. Other school systems do this also but I believe Catholic schools whilst offering the same curriculum often have a unique and structured approach that filters through all areas of the school focussing on the wellbeing of every student. This also extends to their families and there is nothing like a crisis to see a Catholic school go into action and support the needs of those experiencing difficulties. Catholic schools do this very well.

Convenient:

This parent enrols their child because it is convenient. Perhaps the school is local and easy to get to, easily accessible by public transport or offers after school care programs that can help with family management. The school has a positive reputation in the local area and at times if other local schools has a less than desirable reputation then the interest in the Catholic school increases.

The cost is convenient and as mentioned the Catholic school might have a better reputation than other local schools. Often this parent believes that the child will be exposed to a better standard of education than at other local schools and they want a “private education” at an affordable price. Independent schools are not in their budget and they don't want their child to attend the “State School.” In other words, it can be a status symbol.

Cost:

Catholic schools charge fees. These are set by the school and in most instances the fees are reasonable and affordable to most families. Comparatively speaking, Catholic schools can be super cheap compared to Independent Schools whose fees could be considerably more. Catholic schools will also support Catholic families that can't afford to pay. It has been held as the Bishops’ Mandate since Catholic schools began in this country that no Catholic child would be denied a Catholic education due to incapacity to pay.

Criteria for Enrolment:

Every Catholic school will have an enrolment policy. This policy clear indicates to all interested families in the community the criteria for enrolling in the school and it will rank applicants in terms of religion and postal address. Starting with the most desirable would be Catholic siblings, new Catholic families and then other religious groups with similar religious philosophies to Catholics, such as Greek Orthodox and so on. The last group considered will be non Catholic children or children not residing in the area. Many Catholic schools will take enrolments from children who are not Catholic provided there are vacancies and the family demonstrates their support of the school's ethos and practices.

It is an urban myth that Catholic schools are required to take a certain percentage of non Catholic children. Catholic schools will vary on their percentage of Catholic enrolment and this can change from year to year and based on the demand from their families from within the community. It is simply determined by demand and supply and if a Catholic school has student places less than the number of Catholic children seeking enrolment then the enrolment policy would need to identify a transparent process allowing further ranking of the Catholic enrolments. This could be based on factors such as when the child was baptised, was this family known at church through their regular attendance and so forth.

Cop it on the chin:

Many parents find the idea of a Catholic education appealing and will pursue enrolment. Most Catholic schools do take non Catholic families and in my experience I have met and dealt with fantastic families who have taken their commitment seriously and have been great supporters of the school and church life supported by the school. They have respected and embraced the ethos and above all else have endeavoured to support this ethos with their children, school and in the home. In most of these cases, the children have thrived in this environment...they are all on the same page.

Many parents whose children are baptised are equally passionate and support the Catholic ethos in all endeavours. There is certainly groups of families in the Catholic school who see baptism, as more of a necessary requirement for enrolment rather than a life choice.

Many families may miss out on a place in a Catholic school and there will be reasons for this. Catholic schools simply can't take everyone and through vast experience, they recognise that certain applicants are simply not suited...this is where you need to cop it on the chin. Sometimes families are not suited to the Catholic philosophy and that decision is made in the best interests of the school and all families.

Catholic membership: How do you join?

To be identified as a Catholic means you need to be baptised within the Catholic Church. In today's world, baptism for children is chosen for many reasons ranging from families wanting to raise their children in the same faith tradition as themselves, families continuing a family tradition of baptism and perhaps keeping older relatives happy, or perhaps put simply, in some families a desire for children to be eligible to go to Catholic schools.

Enrolment to Catholic schools could be a major factor in parents choosing baptism and especially in an area where a school is popular and has too many applications for a limited number of spots then parents seek ways for their application to be competitive.

This can cause grief amongst other families but if baptism is met then a Catholic school is not in a position to judge the value or reasons for that baptism. In highly competitive schools, particularly Catholic secondary schools, the baptism rate for children in Year 4 and 5 can reach extraordinary levels and one would wonder what the cause for conversion is...have they found the Lord? Have they discovered faith?...No, just competitive Catholic school enrolment.

Beyond the Enrolment:

Once a child has been successful in gaining a place in a Catholic school and only then do we see some parents true reason for seeking enrolment. Some parents relax their guard and also appear to forget the commitment that they made toward supporting the ethos of the school.

One consideration for families in seeking a Catholic education is that you need to be supportive of the practices and teachings of the school. This is the ethos and this support isn't just for the interview but for the length of time that your child will be at the school. I have to hold my lips together when parents tell me that their child loves their Catholic school but hates attending religious education classes. Then they will question why these classes are compulsory?

Seriously, did you miss the whole point of a Catholic school? It comes as a complete package and not on a selection basis. Returning to my earlier point, a school choice should be a natural extension of your family's beliefs and values. Whilst many families beliefs and values may not necessarily be based on the baptism of their child, the family needs to consider carefully the time the child spends in the school as it will be based on the school's beliefs and values. If schools and parents are not on the same page then this is not the school for you or your family. Go and look at other options and be brave enough to find one that fits.

Not matter what your school of choice is I would reiterate that your child's learning is far greater influenced by their home than what any school can offer you. Thus your school must be an extension and reflection of your home. Don't be frightened to seek the right fit.

The Western Port Cluster has a Facebook page. Click here:

#secondary #school #high school #primary school #students #teacher #parents #parent engagement #enrollment

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westernportcluster-blog · 8 years ago

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Valuing teachers:

August 2017 Anne-Marie Houlihan

It's funny how some memories are quite life defining. I am reluctant to say for the preservation of my age, that it happened nearly 30 years ago now and I was at the start of my teaching career. As a new teacher I was finding my way in the classroom and I was dealing with parents of my students for the first time in my career. My first parent-teacher interviews were fairly straightforward and on the face of it I was going well and then this happened...Let's take a short trip down memory lane... if you are as old as me you would possibly recall the television show called LA Law. It was one of the first shows that I recall that was a drama-filled American soapie that followed the lives of lawyers all working for a very flash Los Angeles law firm. Parties, glamour, very attractive people, drama, fancy cars, expensive clothing and people sitting behind desks for a very small part of the action-packed hour solving problems in an instance without working up a sweat and clearly getting a huge pay packet. Who wouldn't want to be a lawyer??

If you conducted research that year I would suggest the spike in children wanting to be lawyers would show a significant increase and the question that I would reflect on is “what do lawyers not on LA Law actually do?” I would assume that most students wanting to be a lawyer wouldn't know either…

Back to my parent interviews and at the time I was teaching a remedial mathematics group of Year 9 students. Basically I had the bottom 9 performing students out of a cohort of around 140 students. It was an all-girls school and even at a young teacher age I did more mothering and supporting than teaching of these young women. It was a fantastic experience and I really got to know and love those kids. It was also the hardest I had worked as a teacher because it was so much more than a modified curriculum.

They were quirky, high spirited ...aka some of them couldn't sit still to save themselves and they didn't have much Maths knowledge. They taught me plenty and as much as they drove me nuts I could still name most of that class. Their struggle was real and we would celebrate small achievements like a large lotto win.

Back to my parent interviews and one of the mothers of the weakest students in that class sat down before me and we had a forthright discussion of her daughter's ability and progress. We talked about her future aspirations and I was absolutely flawed when the mother said the child wanted to do law...you know like LA Law. She wasn't the first parent that night to make that connection between their child, their future career aspirations framed around that same television show....I kid you not.

Whilst aspirations need to be encouraged, realistic goals need be endorsed. I spoke carefully about this career aspiration and felt that I was making professional headway in pointing out the subjects and results required for such a career and then the bombshell...oh well, if she can't do law, I suppose she can always do teaching….

I think we all have those defining moments in our career and this was one such moment for me. If all else fails then you can always do teaching...I had naively thought that I had joined a respected profession where I had worked hard to get this far…

That was the start of my ears suddenly hearing parents, students and members of the community “put down” teaching. When I was at school I clearly remember being in a home where education and teachers were valued and respected and this was quite foreign to me. It was quite a baptism into the world of many, thinking teaching was only a choice for those who clearly didn’t have other choices or brains for such choices…

Respect for teaching I would suggest is not real strong in the community and this is an absolute travesty. Teachers have the most extraordinary task of shaping little minds to grow into bigger minds. They are responsible for emotional, social and intellectual learning and in their spare time in class many teachers would go to extraordinary lengths to care for their students mental wellbeing too. We have these students in greater numbers in these times and the challenge of such children is ever increasing in trying to meet their needs for both home and school. Fairly enormous and onerous task I would say and the influence a teacher can have on a child can be life-long. Most of us won't remember what a particular teacher taught us but we will recall in an instant how that teacher made us feel.

If we, as parents, wish to create a relationship with our child's teachers then respect for what the teacher does would have to feature on top of the list. The fact that teachers have this influence on our children and, in many families, their importance and relevance in your child's life would come in close behind that of you the parent, makes it pretty damn important in my mind. If this person of great influence on our child isn't in my corner then that would be compromising the best opportunity for my child. Quite simple if we are walking the journey of educating my child(ren) together then it makes sense that this relationship is imperative to the success of my child. My child also has to believe in this relationship and that respect must always be exhibited and role modelled by me, the parent.

From the moment you talk school in your home to your child, from the earliest memory and going forward be that your children know clearly that you value their education and therefore value and respect the relationship with the teacher.

Strategies for doing this:

The language you use to describe the teacher:

First point of respect is use the teacher's name in your home as the child would be required to speak to that named teacher. Refer to the person as Mr Smith or Mrs Jones not Smithy or old bag Jones...you get my drift. Children learn what they live from home. Sarcasm, rolling of eyes and put downs are the job of a teenager not a parent. Always show this respect in your spoken language and body language regardless of your feelings toward the teacher.

Treat the teacher without judgement:

News flash...Your child's version of events and the actions described by your child or the version of events described for the story you get may not be the whole story. Listen to your child and create the situation of wanting to speak to the teacher and find out what happened. Find out their side of the story and leave the emotion out and seek facts. Support the relationship not the drama of the situation.

Tolerance:

No teacher is perfect but they generally love kids, value their job and do the best they can. That doesn't make them perfect...it makes them real people. Remember as a parent you are not perfect either.

Manipulation and myth:

We need to applaud all our children for having highly-trained skills of manipulation. Just because your child doesn't appear to exhibit behaviours in front of you doesn't mean they don't do it. Sentences like “My child would never do anything like that” are usually from a delusional parent. Trust me, teachers have enough to do without deliberately plotting and planning to seek vengeance on a child.

Teachers are professional:

If I have to hear one more time that the teacher has it in for my child….blah, blah, blah. When your child describes a situation, then please put your professional hat on as you would expect a teacher to do the same. Responding to a situation with a teacher needs to be factual and the strength of the relationship needs to be based on mutual respect and both parties wanting the best for the child. Always focus on the child not the personality of the teacher. Seriously, you will not like all of your child's teachers. Ever had a relative, a friend or a work mate that you don't particularly like? Chances are you won't have to spend Christmas with the teacher but you will have to spend Christmas with the relative...recognise how the two are very different scenarios.

Teachers are real humans with real feelings:

When I was first teaching, I remember students asking me what I did in my spare time. They had visions or more honestly delusions of what teachers do. As a young teacher, I was dating a teacher from the same school and students thought we would do our marking together or lesson preparation...seriously? You can share in my secret that we had a life outside of school…I even went on and married him!

Teaching for most is a vocation:

The 12 weeks a year holiday and we work from 8:30 to 3:30 is about as mythical as unicorns and fairies. To be a teacher, you actually have to work hard toward a qualification and then spend enormous hours outside of the classroom putting in the hours of preparation necessary to give the young minds in front of you the greatest opportunity for learning success. Trust me it is not a job, it’s a vocation...there would be far easier ways to earn money if it was simply a job.

I often wonder what happened to those young women in my Year 9 Maths class of all those years ago? I can still picture and name most of them...as a teacher the ones that needed you most are the ones you remember most. My hope as a teacher is that they remember me and again not what I taught but how I made them feel.

The Western Port Cluster has a Facebook page. Click here:

#Teachers #parents #parent engagement #highschool #primary school #relationship #education #Teaching & Learning #learning #family

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westernportcluster-blog · 8 years ago

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The Homework Headache:

Anne-Marie Houlihan July 2017

Sometimes I feel like schools continue practices simply because that's how it has always been done. Homework is one of those practices and yes, I remember homework at school...do you? In primary school we would come home with spelling words to write out and then have to use in a sentence...practising Maths times-tables, doing maybe some sums or fractions or whatever you were currently learning and we would always throw in a bit or reading for good measure. Then there were the projects with the large piece of coloured cardboard with the picture cutouts and of course the pretty borders...does anyone remember going to the local travel agent for brochures? We even went to the local library for a good encyclopedia and a photocopy machine. That is how we did it.

The after school routine was exactly that...a routine. Once homework was complete, I recall an outdoor play with the siblings or the riding of the bike around the neighbourhood followed that and then it was bath time, dinner and some television time before bed. I don't know if that sounds familiar and apart from netball training one day after school in the winter, I don't really recall any other activities. That's my memory and it really does show I'm getting old...it reeks of traditional ritual and routine and that's how it was for my family back in the 70’s and 80’s.

Recently I reconnected via social media with many of my primary school mates and we have recalled lots of stories about our times together. I was only in a small class of around 15 girls. Most of us walked to and from school and Mum was at home both morning and after school. My mum didn't drive and a couple of my classmates mothers did drive and they even had their own car...that was a huge deal and I can only think of one mother who worked outside the home and she ran our school tuckshop. The rest were full time at home. All of us lived with a mum and dad and it was considered pretty damn exciting if one of my mates did something other than netball. That was big news…

Now, I am not a homework knocker but with most of my blog entries you will find my purpose is to challenge complacency and the status quo and make you think about your actions and mindset that you undertake toward your child and their education. Many of those thoughts will come from your own experience of schools; reflecting on them within today's world is what I encourage you to do. Put homework now in the context of 2017.

Turn the clock forward and now I am the parent. My child is in a class and most of her classmates come from a diverse range of families from single parents to co-parenting and every other combination that in today's world is considered normal for family. There is no such thing anymore as a traditional family and no family in the 21st century has a traditional lifestyle.

These parents work a variety of jobs and certainly not only in school hours. In many families, community and school services support their child with after school care, often grandparents are key caregivers, and the reality is that many children come home to empty houses.

For most children they have at least two activities outside of school ranging from sport, dance, drama, karate, tutoring and a vast assortment of other activities. Each of these activities take a variety of time commitments. As a parent the strategic planning that goes into any week is not for the faint hearted and I often hear other mums describe their busiest time of day from 3:30 pm to around 7:30 pm at night. None of the above descriptions has even mentioned, let alone considered, a whiff of the word ‘homework’…

Homework is always a topical subject amongst schools and parents. It is frequently part of research projects and studies that explore its relevance, and in short, without any formal research, I would like to say it is one of the greatest challenges and stresses facing today's families. How do I know this? Simple...talk to families and they will tell you this…

In short, traditional homework practices as described in my life back in the 70’s and 80’s are still being pushed by some schools today. Whilst school personnel may discuss its benefits and relevance I can't help but think they forget to place the relevance and benefits whilst facing outward to their families and seeing how it can work in today's family.

The short and final answer is it can’t…

I talk about Don Edgar the sociologist who describes “The purpose of a school is to help a family educate a child.” If schools are serious about working with, and walking along side, families then there is little evidence in some schools that suggests they are doing this when it comes to homework.

I applaud schools who have met this challenge head-on and changed practice to work with families and students with a growth mindset and flexibility as central factors - and the benefits are proven. Most of these less-traditional approaches still have reading has an essential element along with more practical and enjoyable activities that encourage family learning with the child. It also encourages a positive learning experience for the child...

Strategies that are essential for today's family:

Flexibility: I have seen some schools offer activities given as a grid-type approach and children choose their own homework over a longer period of time. If the grid has 30 possible ideas then the child might have to do 6 from that list across a period of say four weeks. Families can be flexible in scheduling this in.

Variety: Allow for children and families to choose from a wide range of interests and ideas. Learning needs to be fresh and encourage creativity to achieve the end result. Learning is not a one size fits all.

Value fresh air: Children need to recognise that outdoor play is not only necessary learning but so beneficial to their emotional and social growth. This comes from parents and schools encouraging outdoor play as valuable learning.

Cater for all learning styles: Not all children like to sit down at a desk after school and “do school work.” It’s a huge struggle for some kids to do this all day. Don’t bring this grief into the home. What easier way is there to really reinforce a hate of learning than this model.

Learning comes in lots of different ways: So many educational articles encourage our children to develop a growth mindset and follow enquiry based learning but these seem to be forgotten when it comes to homework. Whilst I recognise that often the purpose of homework is to reinforce learning then how that is achieved needs to be focussed on adaptability.

Family time is limited: Many children who undertake afternoon activities or attend after school care may not get home until dinner time. What chance or energy does a parent have at this point to support their child's learning? Getting a meal on the table is challenging enough.

Homework causes stress: We are encouraging children to develop good study habits but smaller children may see homework as one of their greatest stresses. Most parents want the best for their child and not every family can deliver the required attention to homework. The child stresses, the parent stresses, the school stresses and the message sent to the child is a negative one.

Consideration of the consequences of not completing homework: Many teachers will keep track of incomplete homework and there is punishment. Often students have to stay in at lunch time to complete it. What child is going to value homework under those circumstances especially if it is not their decision to be able to do it? Again we reinforce a negative message about learning.

Homework needs to be valued by the teacher and checked: Many teachers don't check homework; the students catch on and immediately draw the conclusion that it is not important. Why bother doing it? No intrinsic reward if you can be playing with your mates rather than doing something you don't like and teachers don't value it.

Homework can place a wedge between home and school: If a child has not completed their homework and thinks they will be punished, they may not wish to go to school. Stomach aches and headaches are very contagious in this situation and children will miss school. Trying to get a stressed child to school is no easy task and school refusal in some instances becomes a reality. Once again a negative message about learning.

Like all facets of a child's education, families have a responsibility in this homework process and feedback should be taken to your child's school. A conversation between home and school placing the needs of the child as a priority will allow both parties to share what is possible and what is not.

It is interesting to note though that some schools would be keen to change the homework structure or not have any; however, when they survey or discuss the topic with parents then the parents are insistent on their children doing homework. For today's fast paced and ever-changing world, parents need to be informed of current research and not fall into the “just because we did it when we were at school” mindset. That mindset definitely needs to be put to rest permanently.

Parents, talk to your school and schools, talk to your parents. Have a conversation, look at the value and the challenges and come up with a solution together. Present the facts and work toward the benefits. It will be in the best interests of the children and that is what schools and parents have in common...the best interests of our children.

The Western Port Cluster has a Facebook page. Click here:

#homework #students #parent engagement #parenting #teacher #school #primary school #parent #family #learning

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westernportcluster-blog · 8 years ago

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From Carpark to Classroom:

July 2017 Anne-Marie Houlihan

My first experience with navigating the primary school car park will remain etched in my memory forever. It took place almost twenty years ago and came about when one of my friends with four small children suddenly was struck down with appendicitis and rushed to hospital where she underwent emergency surgery. I was childless at the time and had been thoroughly spoiled by sharing these four beautiful children but certainly not in this capacity and stepping up to the plate was both challenging and exhausting. Not to mention eye-opening…

I was called to action as four small children needed to be cared for and each of them requiring to be transported to the correct location at an allocated time wearing appropriate attire whilst carrying a necessary assortment of supplies. What an immersion to pretend motherhood from a standing start...I was about to be a “school mum!”

Three of the children were in primary school and given the eldest child was around ten years old, he was able to guide me in some of the intricate yet complex tasks that my friend undertook each morning. I thought I knew her well but in those few days I learnt I didn't know her at all. I’m so sorry…

To finish the story, my friend got better and I never took her health or her role as a mother for granted ever again. Without realising it, I also starting living what was to become my favourite philosophy of “It takes a village to raise a child”...ain’t that the truth.

The Western Port Cluster has a Facebook page. Click here:

#school #high school #primary school #kids #students #parent engagement #parenting #learning #Teaching & Learning #teacher

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westernportcluster-blog · 8 years ago

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Let the Secondary Journey Begin:

Anne-Marie Houlihan

July 2017

Photo Bree Colcott

I love the look of the students on the first day of Year 7. Most are wearing brand new uniform and I’m particularly fascinated with their brand new shoes. You never see shoes so shiny, clean and perfect again! These shoes have already started a journey for secondary school, travelling for the first time from their individual homes to secondary school for their very first day and they carry all sorts of emotions and experiences.

At the end of the school day, these shoes go back to their homes where shared stories and tales of their day happen and we herald the start of the school year with this continuing cycle of home to school and back again. As the weeks go by, those shoes will already hold stories and battle wounds of your child’s day and may we, as parents, recognise the changes happening and always make time to listen to our children and show interest in their education. Let us value the wearer of those shoes and their education.

Secondary school is different to primary school and as parents you also need to walk the journey of transition. The secondary school initially can feel daunting because it doesn't look and feel like your primary school. That’s because it is not supposed to. It’s meant to feel different for good reason. Your child is about to commence a very different learning journey. The question I pose is are you ready for that journey?

To assist in transitioning parents, I would again start with the basics of getting to know staff at your child's new school. In order for your child to settle and achieve success, you need to build a relationship with your new school and your family. Your school will tell you who is the first point of contact and how to contact them.

Common concerns of parents:

I am overwhelmed by so many teachers that now teach my child.

My child might be in classes where they don't know anybody.

Some of those bigger students look enormous and will they pick on my child?

Will my child be able to keep up?

My child is not good at organising themselves.

The school is so large and who will keep on eye on my child?

What if my child can't handle their locker?

What if they get lost?

How do I get to know my child's new friends?

Pick up and drop off is so different and almost foreign to primary school.

Will my child be able to manage catching the bus?

I don’t feel really welcome going into the school.

I hated high school.

They don’t know my child like I do.

It looks and feels so different to primary school.

All of these concerns and more have been felt every year by parents the world over. Whilst I am not going to address each of this concerns, I would instead say that secondary schools are well aware of the issues and will offer new parents resources and information nights to help, opportunities to ask questions and ways to contact and connect the school.

Secondary schools often have a computing program specifically for parents that enables parents to monitor the child's learning across the range of subjects. At my child’s school it's called PAM (Parent Access Module). It will also give you alerts of assessment tasks, assignments and tests. Teachers give feedback on assessment tasks and you are part of the learning.

Schools often have Facebook pages and other social media platforms to keep parents informed and parents should always be willing to read the newsletter. Many schools have signed up to apps and programs which inform parents and as a parent myself I love that paper notes are nearly extinct and instead specific permission forms are received in my inbox or via the app.

Settling into secondary school for you and your child won't happen overnight and I would suggest that Term 1 is an enormous challenge and you will be exhausted by the time it is over. If you have a question or concern then approach the school. Also allow your child the opportunity to take a specific question to school. Start building the responsibility and independence factor. Most students will have a homeroom teacher and your child is old enough to start seeking solutions themselves. The road to independence is a necessary life skill for your child. Let those shoes do the walking and the talking...

In my experience, Receptionists at the front desk of a secondary school are extraordinary people who have much knowledge and wisdom and my advice for you is to always treat them well as those staff will get you through every question and situation. They will be able to direct any enquiry you may have. They are there specifically to help parents and students.

Students may take a few weeks to settle and don't be surprised if the child is anxious and quiet in the morning and by the time they return home they are loud and almost on a high. The processing of emotion is huge and for most, puberty will have commenced in some way. No one size fits all here. Children may not appear to skip a beat and surprise you as to how well they take to school. Find ways to seek a conversation place or time with your child and find out how they are going. Driving in the car is fantastic for this as no eye contact often allows the child to relax and speak freely. If you have to, drive a longer route to get where you’re going…

Let the child get home and don't start with the questions. At all costs you must avoid the question, “How was school today?” and instead work on particular questions like “Have you met anyone new today? What was something you learnt today? What was the best thing about your day?” to name a few.

One effective strategy to support your child in connecting to their new school is the “three-B” rule:

Be nice to everyone you meet.

Be prepared to try new things.

Be organised.

As a parent you will also benefit by following the “three-B” rule too and I would add another one:

Be informed.

New friends for your child should be welcome news at home and perhaps organising an afternoon after-school catch up or a weekend get together is still a great way to go. Invite the parent for a cuppa and get to know the parents of your child's new friends. Start building those relationships and they will again prove invaluable in future years when riding the roller coaster of raising a teenager occurs…believe me you will be so glad of the support.

Finally, remember that how you approach this new phase in your child's life, your attitude, your direction and support will be the greatest guide and have the greatest impact on your child's transition. Try and walk and enjoy the journey of transition together.

Again, may I compare those new shiny school shoes to your commitment and involvement in the secondary school with your child's education. May those shoes show good marks of the journey travelled but we must always work with our children to maintain those shoes. School shoes like school relationships must be cared for and regular maintenance and attention is essential. Let's hope those shoes continue to serve as a reminder of your relationship with your child's teachers, friends and school and may they all shine for this school year.

The Western Port Cluster has a Facebook page. Click here:

#school #education #student #students #parent engagement #parent #teacher #teaching & learning #secondary #high school

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westernportcluster-blog · 8 years ago

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Communicating Effectively with Parents in the Secondary School:

What’s on The Other Side of the Wall? June 2017

Anne-Marie Houlihan

In my article titled “Communicating Effectively With Your Secondary School: A Parent Perspective”, I explore the relationship between parents and teachers. The strength of any relationship is often only ever tested under pressure and I create the notion of the champion parent as opposed to the rage-driven delusional maniac that can sometimes make an appearance... as a parent and an educator, I absolutely believe that children need a champion and an advocate and the rage driven delusional maniac must never be let out...ever.

Whilst we want parents take this role of champion for their child, let's consider that your child's teachers want you to be that champion too. If you have any doubt about this, stop and consider the reality that an average secondary school would have upward of 500 teenagers with raging hormones, all going through puberty roll through their gates every morning….then 25 of them at a time in a class with one adult, that chooses to be there and has to impart some knowledge at the same time and can repeat this process for up to 6 times a day....enough said and if that doesn't convince you, nothing will.

After that description of a secondary school, It seems almost wrong of me to suggest that teachers need to embrace the opportunity to work with families. They have plenty on their plate. For many teachers though, time and other constraints builds the perception that the only relationship needed, or that they have time for, is based on the child who sits in their classroom. In the secondary school, a teacher can have upward of 150 students in their care in any one week. No small challenge there and it adds to the belief that it seems difficult for the teacher to form a meaningful relationship with the child who sits in front of them and impossible for a relationship with the parents of that child.

Don Edgar, a Sociologist says it well. “The purpose of a school is to help a family educate a child.” I believe that teachers have an obligation to foster parent relationships, just as parents have an obligation to work with teachers. 40 years of research shows that when parents and teachers work together, the child benefits. As a parent I believe it to be absolutely essential.

There are many challenges to the formation of this relationship and there is only so many hours in a day. Teachers are normal people too and often they have experienced the wrath of an angry parent, an unreasonable parent, a polarised parent or one that appears to harbour a grudge. Perhaps the rage-driven delusional maniac appeared at a meeting or on the phone...Who would want to deal with parents if these are some of your past experiences? The answer is none of us would.

Change comes when both parties recognise the need for change and are prepared to do something about it. When parents and teachers work together because they both want what is best for the child then anything is possible. Small changes in thinking can result in big changes in practice. I love this phrase as it has proven to me time and time again that it works.

If I asked parents what would their reaction be if they received a phone call from their child's teacher? Their first response, in most cases I would guess is “what is wrong” or more to the point “what has the child done wrong”? We may laugh at that but I would think that would be the answer for 95% of the parents I asked. We need to change that perception and I will now explore some simple strategies that could bring about positive change and benefits for all...and wait there’s more...they won't take up much time and may in fact save time and possible grief in the longer term.

Strategies that teachers can implement to build authentic relationships with parents:

At the start of the school year or semester, write a letter of introduction, outline what you will be teaching, set a positive tone and inform parents how you intend to communicate with them. Invite them to communicate any concerns or relevant information regarding the child and set up a process of communication for parents to contact you.

Ask parents to reply to your email and give 3 things they would like you to know about their child. These things could range from what they love to do in their spare time, their favourite footy or sporting team or what they are concerned about with your particular class.

Inform parents of what you are teaching and suggest some simple activities or strategies that they could implement in their home to support their child's learning. No teacher expects you to know the curriculum just as no parent expects a teacher to have to parent their child. Build clear expectations for both parties.

Teachers could think about what they are going to teach and encourage parents to be part of the journey. Look for ways to include parent knowledge and expertise.

If work isn't complete or handed in on time, then at secondary level we would expect the child to take responsibility for their learning and they could email their parents and work a solution between home and school.

No parent wants to know at a parent-teacher interview about a child's poor result from three months earlier. There is nothing to be gained from this so if we turn that forward, the teacher could set some learning goals looking ahead and inform parents of what assessments and work the child will be expected to complete. Walk the learning path beside the child together.

Teachers could offer a coffee and a chat once per term per class before school. Parents are busy people but if it is important to them and they are given sufficient notice then they will make it a priority. Pick a time that is potentially family friendly. Before or after school and 30 minutes maximum would be all that is needed.

Secondary schools have homework clubs. Most parents will need to collect their children so ask the parents to come in 30 minutes earlier.

Many secondary schools have postcards. As a teacher plan to send 5 per week.

Teachers need to keep a parent list of attendance. By this I mean the teacher needs to tick off every child in their class and keep an overview of who they have met and spoken to. If there is a couple of parents that you have never seen or spoken to then they are the ones who could get a phone call. You would be amazed at the turn-around and possible support from a parent if a teacher reaches out to them about their child. Most parents want the best for their child and they may simply be intimidated by the school or feel isolated for many reasons.

Most secondary schools have a homeroom system or pastoral care system. These systems are created for the purpose of supporting the wellbeing of the child. If a teacher has too many classes then perhaps another channel is through the homeroom where each teacher would have approximately 25 students. Across Term 1, five phone calls per fortnight would see a teacher talk to every parent of the children in their homeroom by the end of Term 1.

In a staff meeting, a staff briefing, or learning area meeting, put parent contact and relationships on the agenda. Spend ten minutes on sharing stories of how you have successfully contacted parents, a strategy that was effective and remember to share stories of success.

As all people do, we tend to remember the bad interactions we have with others. I encourage teachers to focus on the fact that most parents are supportive and want the best for their child. This of course will look very different for every family. Putting the needs and success of the child as the focus of the conversation sets a positive platform to form authentic relationships.

I would encourage teachers to pick a colleague or two to form a group to encourage each other to make contact with parents. Monitor how each of you are going and encourage the practice.

Our invisible wall that appears to run through the middle of the parent carpark and the school administration building can be climbed, lowered or even better removed altogether. It takes change and again I reiterate it only takes a small change in thinking to result in big changes in practice. There is no power greater than a community discovering what it cares about so let’s do it for the sake of our kids.

Anne-Marie Houlihan currently leads a Family School Partnership. Parent Engagement is the focus of her work and along with her experiences of education from a variety of roles including a secondary classroom teacher, a Year co-ordinator, leading vocational educational community programs, working with Youth at Risk, Enrolments and Marketing and a mother's experience of schools, there seems to be a wealth of experience of 30 years experience to draw from.

The Western Port Cluster has a Facebook page. Click here:

#education #secondary #teacher #parent engagement #parenting #school

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westernportcluster-blog · 8 years ago

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Communicating Effectively with Your Secondary School:

A Parent Perspective : June 2017

Anne-Marie Houlihan

I work with schools in building relationships. Sounds strange really… and how do I know this? The looks from people when you tell them that's what you do for a job is exactly how I know. I almost think they have some picture of me as a real life dating app where perhaps I match lonely teachers and parents perhaps…no such luck.

I come as a parent and an educator and I work with schools, students and parents on projects that help us work together more effectively. 40 years of research shows that if parents and teachers work effectively together our children will flourish.

All of this work must begin with forming authentic relationships. Whilst most primary and secondary schools show genuine intent to work with parents, so much information seems to be initiated from the school and forwarded to the parent. Most parents welcome this information and support the school accordingly and off we go…until something goes wrong.

For most parents, they work with their school and parents seek information about their child's progress and relevant opportunities through school newsletters, formal reporting processes and parent teacher interviews to name a few. Parents where possible support their child in school in so many practical ways from wearing the uniform appropriately, turning up to school on time with the right equipment, supporting school rules and so much more. This forms a useful relationship but not one that sees the parent feeling at times that they have a voice. Then something goes wrong...and what happens then?

Most schools have a physical fence located around their boundary but I want to talk about the high, sometimes impenetrable and always invisible wall that exists around school administration blocks and runs right through the parent car park. If schools are serious about working with parents then together we need to break down this invisible wall.

So many secondary parents will tell me a concern that have around their child's learning, a situation occurring in class or they are unhappy about something they are seeing happen to their child. I will try to listen and then I encourage them to approach the teacher or appropriate school staff member. That's when the conversation completely changes and shuts down. Suddenly they give me endless reasons why they won't do that, that they will be misinterpreted or misrepresented or they give reasons and why they won't go there. Why does the secondary school appear to hold even greater power and obstruction than the primary school? Why does any school have this response from parents? I really find it disappointing...something we need to challenge and change.

Here are some of the reasons given by parents for not making contact:

I don't feel I can express myself adequately.

I don't feel comfortable in the secondary school as I don't know my child's teacher like I did in primary school.

I don't think the school will do anything about it so why bother?

Why is such a horrible person still teaching and what good will it do?

The teacher will then pick on my child and the situation will be worse.

I just don't think I can talk to them.

I feel dumb because I didn't do well at school myself.

I feel intimidated because the school is so big.

I'm scared that they will then take it out on my child.

And so many more...

If you look at this list, all reasons and many more that could be given have one major component in common...they show distrust for the relationship. As someone in education, I can't actually pinpoint how the culture of schools evolved to such an extent that parents can’t step forward or are scared to use their parent voice. Our schools deliberately or not, have done a great disservice to our parent communities and appear to be dismissive or perhaps not very interested in the parent knowledge that could be brought to the table to enhance the learning outcomes of their child.

So how can we fix this? We need to see if teachers and parents can find common ground and it is very simple. The common ground is the child. Both parents and teachers want what is best for the child and my first challenge for change is simply advising parents to remember that the teacher also wants what is best for your child. Teachers may not always get it right or do that in a manner that seems apparent but the only way you can move forward is to support that basis and communicate with them. Can I also remind you that parents don't always get parenting right either…

As a parent, I absolutely believe that children need a champion and an advocate. If you as a parent won't stand up for your child then who will? Enough said...think about it. One late but very important consideration...a champion has to act like a true champion, not some rage driven maniac wearing their delusional glasses that have “my child is perfect” written across the lens...no, no, no!

Teachers are professionals and will treat you in a professional manner. As a parent you need to believe that and move toward communication in a positive and open manner. You need to be professional and respectful too. Parents need to use their champion approach and never let the rage driven delusional maniac out...ever!

Some strategies for parents to communicate positively with teachers:

First choose your preferred method of communication. I would choose email or a phone call depending on the circumstances and the school’s preferences.

If you are nervous and feel concerned that you will not be able to express yourself adequately, then choose email. Write your concerns and stick to the facts. As a professional exchange, remember there is no need for emotion.

Get a friend to check your email or practice your planned conversation.

Be proactive and ask at parent nights how and who the secondary school wants you to contact. In other words become familiar with the preferred process.

Before you speak with a teacher, jot your concerns down in a list and talk to the list.

Be calm and open. Ranting, raving, or yelling is not going to get you anywhere and thus not help your child or resolve the situation.

Tell the teacher why you are making contact. Explain the situation and your concerns.

Let the teacher talk and answer your concerns and questions.

Pick an appropriate time and place for your conversation to be most effective.

Come up with some solutions together. Make sure you have some solutions written down for the purpose of moving forward and always for the benefit of the child.

In working toward a solution, don't expect an instant solution and look toward a plan of change and nominate a timeframe.

Before you finish the conversation, plan the next time you will communicate and how.

Try and be realistic. You may not get a perfect solution.

Teachers are not the enemy and sharing your concerns about the teacher with others in the carpark is not useful. Stop and reframe the concern to be about the child. This is another golden rule. Frame the concern in relation to the child. Rather than thinking that nasty, horrible teacher gives far too much homework, the reframe would be that you are concerned that your child is struggling to keep up with the homework allocated and you wish to discuss this.

A conversation with the teacher using your champion approach could uncover the following scenarios:

Your child is a social butterfly or is struggling to concentrate and won't do the set work in class and has to complete it for homework.

The teacher is concerned about your child and their classmates as they are struggling to keep up with the required curriculum and the teacher is giving extra opportunities to reinforce concepts at home.

The teacher is giving too much homework and the students are not giving appropriate feedback to the teacher.

Sometimes secondary teachers give a broad range of homework options and suggest that students follow up and work on what they need to. Students need to become responsible and self-directed with their learning. Some our children struggle greatly with independent choice and think they have to do all of it. That is what they hear and not what the teacher said.

Change can only come from a conversation. Students can struggle with the changed environment that secondary school brings and as the parent you will know what your child can resolve with a teacher and when you need to step in. There is great learning to be had by encouraging your child to talk to their teacher about concerns themselves. All part of life learning and I’d encourage this approach first.

The first time you follow this process you will be petrified. Like anything we do that makes us feel somewhat uncomfortable, we won't want to do it but in most circumstances a positive outcome or result for the situation will give you some confidence. You are building a trusting relationship, your child benefits and your child learns that not only are you in their corner, you are modelling some great behaviour. Watch that wall crumble...

The relationships between parents and teachers needs to be valued and cultivated. At times it appears that little opportunity is afforded for the cultivation of such relationships and I am frequently encouraging schools to seek opportunities. It doesn't matter how big or small your child's secondary school is, what matters is the approach. In the words of Nike, you CAN do it!

Anne-Marie Houlihan currently leads a Family School Partnership. Parent Engagement is the focus of her work and along with her experiences of education from a variety of roles including a secondary classroom teacher, a Year co-ordinator, leading vocational educational community programs, working with Youth at Risk, Enrolments and Marketing and a mother's experience of schools, there seems to be a wealth of experience of 30 years experience to draw from.

The Western Port Cluster has a Facebook page. Click here

#School #secondary #parent engagement #Relationships #education #Teaching #Parent #Engagment

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