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[whatisthismandoinghere]

When you see a shrine

[whatisthismandoinghere]

Come watch Hogan's Heroes, we have...

• Short king firecracker chef & self-proclaimed uncle of dogs

• Sweet goofy neurodivergent cinnamon roll who does the science & has the highest kill count in the show

• Fearless leader who definitely has favorite children & could probably convince you a brick was made of solid gold

• Lovably sleazy James Bond reject card shark who charms his way into your heart & your safe

• The quiet, capable sane one who holds everything together & has occasional bouts of sass

• Guy acting friendly & refined in an unfriendly unrefined business who wonders why he loses street cred daily

• Guy who can't always be bothered, but can always be bribed with food & we don't talk about how lowkey relatable that is enough

[whatisthismandoinghere]

For the drabbles prompt:

"Kill Me" - After Hogan is caught outside the wire on one of his solo missions, Klink is forced to choose between killing Hogan or being shot himself, with the implication that Hogan will be shot either way. So Klink regrettably kills him, but only because he knows his prisoners need him.

I am happy to announce that I have finally finished a request!! For you my dear friend <3 I'd also like to thank you and everyone else who has requested things for their patience as I very slowly wade my way through them all lol but without further ado!!

"Herr Kommandant! Major Hochstetter... he- he caught Colonel Hogan... outside the wire."

They were words that Klink had been dreading to hear and that day had finally come. They echoed loudly in his mind over and over as he desperately tried to think of what to do, what to say, but nothing came.

"Kommandant?" Schultz gently spoke again, snapping Klink back to reality. "What are we going to do?"

Klink stared at Schultz for a moment, realizing how tired and sad he looked. He knew the sergeant was a good man, and he only wanted the best for the prisoners and for this terrible war to be over. But he couldn't give him any hope, for Klink couldn't find any himself.

"I honestly don't know, Schultz," Klink finally answered. "I don't know if there's anything we can do."

"But there must be something."

There had to be, Schultz just knew it. Things couldn't end like this. Hogan couldn't... he just couldn't... Schultz couldn't even being himself to think the word.

Die.

Schultz shuddered a little then turned to face Klink again, hoping against hope that he would be able to do something.

"Send them in," Klink said tiredly. "Maybe we can make this up as we go along."

Schultz nodded then turned to open the door to Klink's office, hoping his commanding officer was as good at winging it as Colonel Hogan was.

☆☆☆

"Colonel Klink," Hochstetter growled menacingly as he entered the office. He radiated confidence and pride with every step he took, fully basking in the glory of the capture of his greatest rival, Colonel Hogan of the USAAF.

Klink could hardly stand Hochstetter's attitude. It made him feel sick to his stomach, but he could not let him know that. He tried to put on a brave face and puffed out his chest, but he felt so deflated on the inside.

"Major Hochstetter," Klink answered, trying to keep his voice steady and making the choice to stand up behind his desk, hoping the fact he was taller than the major would help boost his own confidence. "What brings you here at this ungodly hour?"

"I'm so glad you asked," Hochstetter answered sinisterly as he reached his hand back and dragged Hogan forward. "Missing any prisoners lately?"

Klink looked at Hogan for a moment, noticing that Hochstetter had already had some fun. Hogan's clothes were rumpled and torn. Civilian clothes. There was blood running down the side of his face. A dark bruise was starting to form on his cheek and his hands were tied behind his back. The longer Klink looked, the worse the situation seemed to become.

"Major-" Klink began.

"Let me stop you right there, Colonel. You know the rules just as well as I do. I caught Hogan in civilian clothes, which means he is no longer protected by the Geneva Convention. A pity really."

A twisted smile crossed Hochstetter’s face as he nonchalantly pulled out his pistol and admired the gleam of it in the light of Klink's office.

"I'm sure there's a perfectly reasonable explanation, Major-"

"Like what? Are you trying to cover for him? Or maybe trying to cover for your disloyalty to the Fatherland?"

"That's not what I said. If you'd only let me finish-"

"I'm tired of talking Kommandant," Hochstetter said through clenched teeth. "There's only one way for this to end."

Hochstetter paused for a moment, then held his pistol out to Klink.

"And why don't you do the honors?"

Klink's eyes went wide as Hochstetter's words sunk in, and he nearly stumbled back into his chair.

"Unless of course, you'd like to join Colonel Hogan?" Hochstetter couldn't help but smirk at his ingenuity.

"Herr Kommandant," Schultz whispered, his hand resting on his heart. He tried to say more, but the words just weren't coming out.

Hogan just felt... numb. Everything that had happened had been a blur, from his initial capture to now, standing here in Klink's office. He was grateful this had been a solo mission though. He couldn't bear to see any of his men meet this fate.

But when Hochstetter had basically threatened to kill Klink if he didn't kill Hogan, he was suddenly paying very close attention. He honestly couldn't say what he'd rather Klink choose. On one hand, if Klink died what would happen to his men? Would they end up with a vicious kommandant that would treat them worse than any of them could have imagined? How would they fare? Could they keep the operation going?

Would they make it out of Stalag 13 alive?

On the other hand, Hogan wasn't quite sure how he felt about... well, dying. Sure, it had always been a possibility, but now it was actually happening. He didn't necessarily want to go out this way, but if his last act would be protecting his men in a way, so be it. He'd be more than happy to do so.

Klink was also fighting an inner battle. How could he bring himself to shoot one of his own prisoners? Especially one that he interacted with daily? He didn't think he could do it.

But then he also had to think of his other prisoners. What would happen to them if he was killed? Would they be treated well?

Klink had finally come to a decision, regrettable as it was.

"Very well, Major," Klink said. "Let us go outside and get this over with."

Klink calmly took the pistol from an incredulous Hochstetter and gently pushed Hogan in front of him, taking the opportunity to whisper in the American colonel's ear and attempt to explain himself.

"I'm sorry, Hogan. I truly am." Klink tried to speak as fast as he could, knowing Hochstetters's shock at his decision wouldn't last forever. "I do not wish to do this. But the other prisoners... I simply cannot risk them falling into the hands of Major Hochstetter or somebody worse, if that's even possible."

Klink braced himself for how Hogan would react. Not that Hogan was a selfish man, far from it. But given the stress of the situation and how uncharacteristically quiet he had been in the office, Klink didn't quite know what to expect.

"I was thinking the same thing," Hogan answered quietly. "I respect your decision, Colonel. Just... just make sure you don't miss," he finished with a half hearted chuckle.

"Hogan..." Klink began.

"There's nothing more to say, Klink. I hold nothing against you. Let's just get this over with, yeah?"

Hogan turned to face the door, but paused for a moment and turned around to face Klink once again.

"Take care of my men. Make sure they don't meet the same fate as me. Please. They have to make it home."

"Of course," was all Klink could manage.

Not that he had much time to say more, for Hochstetter came barging in not soon after.

"What are we standing around here for?" he shouted. "Let us not waste any more time."

☆☆☆

It was a grim scene at Stalag 13.

Hogan, a helpless standing target.

Klink, the reluctant killer-to-be.

Schultz, crying silently at Hogan’s fate.

And Hochstetter, all too happy to see all of these events unfold.

After all, it was to be the major's crowning moment. A capture he had been waiting what felt like a lifetime for. And on top of it all, he had been able to force Klink to be the one to pull the trigger.

Would Hochstetter have liked to be that man? Sure. Killing Hogan would be a great pleasure. But to have the kommandant do it, especially considering the two interacted daily and Klink was opposed to such violence, now that was even better.

Klink fiddled with the gun for a moment, making sure it was loaded, trying to stall for time. But in the end he knew it was useless. Hochstetter's voice soon confirmed that.

"What are you waiting for, Klink? Have you changed your mind and decided to join Hogan? Because I can happily arrange that," Hochstetter called out impatiently. He was getting tired of waiting.

"That will not be necessary," Klink answered tiredly, raising the pistol and aiming right at Hogan's heart.

Schultz couldn't bear to watch, so he turned away as tears continued to stream down his face. He knew why Klink was doing what he was doing, but he didn't know if he would ever be able to look at his commanding officer the same way ever again.

Hogan silently nodded at Klink, trying to reassure him that it was all going to be okay. Trying to assure him that he should not feel guilty, although he knew he would. Trying to assure him that Hochstter would not win in the end.

Klink nodded in return, but he knew this moment would haunt him for the rest of his life. There was no happy ending here. Only death, pain, and sorrow.

Klink took a deep breath and finally pulled the trigger.

Everything seemed to move in slow motion, and after what felt like an eternity the bullet finally struck Hogan. He stumbled backward a bit, before falling to his knees. Blood seeped from his chest and stained his white shirt. Then he finally collapsed and hit the dirt.

☆☆☆

That was always when Klink woke up, tangled up in his sheets and drenched in sweat. It was a recurring nightmare for him, although the victim wasn't always Hogan. Sometimes it was Newkirk, sometimes it was even young innocent Carter. But the ending was always the same, and it always left him feeling hopeless and even more resentful of the monster controlling his country. He was just grateful that he hadn't actually had to kill a prisoner. Although the fact they were only dreams wasn't much comfort.

He knew about Hogan's operation. And he knew that Hogan and his men were usually careful. But he couldn't help but think of the what ifs, which always seemed to manifest themselves into twisted nightmares that haunted Klink's sleep.

That was just proof of how high the stakes were in this war though, and while Klink was definitely proud to be helping Hogan, his men, and the Allies, he wished his mind would find better outlets for his anxiety.

"This cursed war is going to be the end of me," Klink grumbled as he sat up, glancing at the clock which read 0200.

But despite all this he couldn't say he regretted anything. He didn't regret Hogan gathering the courage to tell him about his operation. He didn't regret Hogan and his men asking for his help. He didn't regret saying yes.

Because this cause was worth fighting for. His country was worth fighting for. The fate of Europe and the world as a whole was worth fighting for.

And that was of great comfort to him.

☆☆☆

"Morning Kommandant," Hogan sloppily saluted as he walked into Klink's office.

"Good morning Colonel Hogan," Klink smiled. He was genuinely happy to see the man considering his nightmare from the night before.

"Long night? You look-"

"Exhausted? Defeated?"

"Well... yeah."

Klink remained silent for a moment, flashes of the nightmare playing through his head. "Let us just say that I did not sleep well."

Hogan recognized that look, that blank stare. He also had been in this war long enough to know what "I just didn't sleep well" meant. He also knew better than to outright ask about it, but he decided to offer his support anyway.

He traced the wood on Klink's desk, trying to choose his next words carefully. He didn't want to seem like he was prying, but he also wanted to seem genuine.

"If you ever need to vent, I'm here. I'm just a typical POW. I don't do much," Hogan smirked.

Klink couldn't help but chuckle. "Now we both know that is a lie."

"It was worth a shot." Hogan stood and started to leave the room but paused in the doorway. "I mean it though. I offer the same open door policy to my men. And since you're part of the team now... it applies to you too."

"Thank you, Hogan. I appreciate it. Perhaps I shall take you up on that offer another time. All this paperwork you know..." Klink trailed off and ended with a weak chuckle.

Klink knew it was a weak excuse, and so did Hogan. But Hogan also knew how to take a hint and decided to drop the subject for now. Klink would talk if or when he was ready.

"Well I'll let you get to it. It's a shame they're keeping the Iron Eagle cooped up with such menial tasks."

"Dismissed, Colonel Hogan."

"Too far? Yeah, I suppose you're right," Hogan joked, but then he took on a more serious note. "I meant everything I said though, Klink. If you ever need to talk, I'm here to listen."

Hogan finished with a nod and a somewhat awkward smile then finally left the room, leaving Klink alone with his thoughts.

Klink appreciated the gesture, he really did. But he wasn't sure if he'd ever be able to open up about those nightmares. It was unnerving to see what his mind could come up with at times, but it helped to know he had true friends that wanted to help him.

He had a lot of progress to make, he knew that, but for now that small comfort was enough. He just hoped it'd get him through this bloody war.

[whatisthismandoinghere]

apparently some of you need to hear this?

fanfiction and the writing of it is not a competitive sport? there is no trophy? there is no winning?? no one is better than anyone else.

some of y’all are on so high of a horse that you’re gonna fall off and break your neck. and it’s not gonna be anyone’s fault but yours.

trying to knock others down a peg that you think are “competition” is so so fucking gross. this is a community where we share art and other creations- like fan fiction and we should be treating each other as equals, not as someone we need to “beat”.

pack up your bitterness and your gross, misplaced hatred and take it to another corner of tumblr dot com.

[whatisthismandoinghere]

Oh man it's been a while hasn't it? Where to begin?

For starters I'd like to apologize to everyone who has requested things, naturally life got super hectic and busy right after I opened my requests again and my main source for all my shows (uncle earls classic tv channel) is now gone so I have been trying to search through youtube and the archive to see what footage and episodes I could dig up so that has also hindered my progress, I shall try to do my best to clip and compile what I can and try to get on top of all that

With that being said, I'm going to be closing requests for now (I will still get around to what has been requested already tho of course) but I can't take on any more at the moment

I also have quite a few asks to get around to as well and I'd like to get around to things I've been tagged in

Anywho I'd really just like to say thank u guys for being patient with me, I really am thankful for all the mutuals and friends I have made on this site <3

[whatisthismandoinghere]

you guys i finally got my video editor back!!! i'll try to get all of the requests done as soon as i can, thank u all for being patient with me as i tried to figure this all out

[whatisthismandoinghere]

Per usual I am late to the party but thanks so much for the tag @andietries :)

In no particular order:

10 Things I Hate About You

The Best Years of Our Lives

Cinderella

The Peanuts Movie

Lilo and Stitch

A Goofy Movie

Barbie in the 12 Dancing Princesses

No pressure tags: @frau-wilhelm-klink @walk-in-sunshine @auxiliarydetective @alpacazappa @cairistiona7 @fiddler-sticks and anyone else who sees this and wants to do it!!

list of 7 comfort movies

Thank you for tagging me @waywardtrek !! It was tricky trying to narrow them down but I think these are probably the comfort movies I've watched the most!

Sabrina (the 1954 one with Audrey Hepburn and Humphrey Bogart, not the 90s one)

Love in the Afternoon (I like Audrey Hepburn lol)

A League of Their Own (this movie hits all the right spots for me, I can't explain it)

Labyrinth (had to have at least one Bowie movie in here of course lol)

Howl's Moving Castle

Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring

Loving Vincent (it makes my painter-brain happy)

and I'll tag @crystal-mouse @frogayyyy @reffitt-blog1 if y'all want to do this too :)

[whatisthismandoinghere]

sincerest apologies to those who have made requests for gifsets and such, of course as soon as i opened my requests back up i got swamped and then on top of that my new video editor is being a pain so i am also trying to get that figured out. i just wanted yall to know that i didn't forget about u and i'm not ignoring u!! i'm just trying to get some stuff figured out, thank u all for being patient tho

[whatisthismandoinghere]

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Read More

[whatisthismandoinghere]

I've decided to open up requests again folks! If there are any gif sets, headcanons, episode analysis, or writing you'd like to see, send me an ask or dm! All I ask is nothing romantic or shippy please. Here are the shows I'm willing to do:

Hogan's Heroes

Emergency!

Laramie

Rawhide

Perry Mason

Gunsmoke

Mannix

I may come back and update this list later but this is what I'm sticking with for now

[whatisthismandoinghere]

Aragorn: The fellowship: 🎵a single mom who works two jobs who loves her kids and never stops🎵

[whatisthismandoinghere]

Comet:

shes russian. shes natasha & sonyas godmother and probably my favorite character. her entrance song is titled "moscow" because she greets natasha & sonya as they enter moscow. also i love her

Hogan:

Marya is such a delight of a character, I love every episode she's in. She is one of the few characters who is consistently able to wrong foot and out scheme Hogan, and she has a GREAT time doing it. She is having SO much fun flirting and plotting her way across this war front

She’s a WWII era soviet spy rather than the much more common Cold War era soviet spy. She has an over the top personality and while she’s mostly working towards her own goals, she does help out our main characters in the episodes she appears in.

[whatisthismandoinghere]

I saw myself in the mirror

[whatisthismandoinghere]

experimenting with yet another screen recorder/video editor so ta da! i know i've done this gif set before but this one has no black border, so fancy i know 😂

S2.E4 Operation Briefcase

[whatisthismandoinghere]

[whatisthismandoinghere]

The Angry P-40 flying Tiger

[whatisthismandoinghere]

Holli Rose Art