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grades are important
grades are importan
grades are importa
grades are import
grades are impor
grades are impo
grades are imp
grades are im
grades are i
grades are
grades ar
grades a
grades
grade
grad
gra
gr
g
go
goj
gojo
gojo s
gojo sa
gojo sat
gojo sato
gojo sator
gojo satoru
gojo satoru my love

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OCTOBER . . . a month full of the spookiest things imaginable. you’re never supposed to ask who’s there.
𒈔 NOTE: helllooo !! since i couldn’t decide what to do for a 9k milestone event, i decided to participate in my very first kinktober this year. i‘ll only do three weeks since i’m horrible with a series. some things might be scrapped or not in order at times or i may add as i go on. this is just for fun & i decided to format my kinktober w fics as well as kinks too. hopefully i can finish everything <3 ! i’m excitedddd.
before you enter: reader will always be female aligned, fics are tagged properly, all works are for 18+ audiences
jujutsu kaisen characters only [ modern au! ]
taglist is now closed ! -> kazutober PLAYLIST
OCT. 1ST
TAGS: corruption, dumbification, manhandling, size kink, breath play.
FREAK IN THE SHEETS starring: TOJI FUSHIGURO
SYNOPSIS: lady k and the sick man au, toji finds a new apartment finally after getting abruptly fired, despite someone already living there. yet that’s when he stumbled upon you, a pretty young ghost woman.
OCT. 7TH
TAGS: college!au, the ring!au, exes to lovers, dirty talk, angst.
SEVEN-DAY-SLUT! starring: GOJO SATORU
SYNOPSIS: you and your ex decide to spend halloween together for old times sake. yet a single watch of a videotape leads to an eerie phone call that says you both have seven days to live. might as well fuck each other for the last time, right?
FRIDAY THE FUCKIN’ 13TH
TAGS: hate fucking, overstim, spit, impact play, brat! reader
NIGHTMARE IN MY EX’S SHEETS starring: SUGURU GETO
SYNOPOSIS: you hate halloween parties with a passion. especially if they’re hosted by no one other than your ex-boyfriend suguru geto. he invited you as his plus one, but you’re sure that’s not the only reason he wanted your company.
OCT. 14 — OCT. 18
SIZE KINK starring: NANAMI KENTO
OVERSTIM starring: GOJO SATORU
BREEDING starring: TOJI FUSHIGURO
DUMBIFICATION staring: SUGURU GETŌ
COCKWARMING starring: SUKUNA RYŌMEN
MANHANDLING starring: CHOSO KAMO
OCT. 27 MAKING YOU SQUIRT FOR THE FIRST TIME
( various: sukuna, choso, toji, nanami, gojo, geto )
HALLOWEEN!
TAGS: college! au, ghostface! gojo + ghostface! geto, 3sum, roleplay, manhandling
SEQUEL SCREAMER starring: GOJO & SUGURU GETO
SYNOPSIS: you and your two best friends decide to have a scream movie marathon due to the sudden thunderstom outside. although once you all decide to roleplay and re-enact the franchise, that’s when geto and gojo ask you the infamous question: “what’s your favorite scary movie?”
© kazushawty 2023 — don’t forget to reblog and leave your thoughts 2 support your writers, happy spooky szn y/n ! 🎃
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Pale Blue [Part One]
Geto Suguru x AFAB Pregnant Reader
Warnings: THIS FIC IS CANON COMPLIANT, if you are not caught up on Jujutsu Kaisen's manga, or at the very least if you have not seen "gojo's past" you WILL be spoiled. This story contains darker themes, heavier topics, pregnancy and all the lovely details of it, and lastly explicit sexual content. Read at your own risk!
A/N: Here it is!! Part One!! This fic is super self indulgent for me and I'm very excited for y'all to read it. The idea literally came to me in a dream like a month ago and I woke up and immediately started writing. It's been a long ass time since I've written a plot heavy fic, and it's been well over a year since I've actively planned a multiple part story and gone through with it. So, this fic is kinda like... my baby lol.
Word Count: 19k | Playlist

September 2007
Your mouth felt like chalk, hands trembling ever so slightly as you set the small wand on the countertop in your bathroom. You couldn't think straight, but that unfortunately wasn’t anything new, it had been that way for the last three weeks. Ever since he left, you had felt like your head was stuck in a fishbowl. People eyeing you with pity at the world you had been dropped into, their whispers muffled into incoherent nonsense as you walked by. Satoru was no better off, but he could at least tug his emotions off of his sleeves and place them in his heart where nobody could see them, except for you. At least you would be able to see them if he didn’t shut you out.
Not that you had been any kinder, you had withdrawn too.
The only one who seemed alright was Shoko, her reaction to Suguru’s deflection was nothing out of character. Not many things could shock her to her core, even something as absurd as what Suguru had done couldn’t wipe the gentle smile from her face when she saw him again. You envied her for that level of composure. You envied her for getting to see him again, just as you envied Satoru. For some reason, the man evaded you as if you were the plague. Or perhaps it looked like you were merely chasing after a ghost, a figment of your imagination. You kind of wished that it was true, that Geto Suguru had been someone you conjured up in your mind.
But he wasn’t, he was a real, breathing human who had taken over one hundred lives…. Including his parents. The thought made your mouth taste like metal, everytime you zoned out too long and thought too hard, you’d bite your inner cheek until it bled. Three weeks later you still felt like you were moving on autopilot, the only thing that could pull you out of it would be his gentle embrace. You blinked a bit, the metallic taste coating your tongue as you unclench your jaw and look in the mirror. You hardly recognize yourself, for a moment you think you look just like him, and it's enough to steal the little air you had in your lungs.
You had never thought you'd experience a heartbreak as severe as this one, and you especially didn’t think it would be dealt to you by Suguru. Though you saw all of the signs, the hundreds if not thousands he put out and never let you touch. No, his cries for help were always directed at Satoru. The white haired man never seemed to catch them, and if he did, he never said a thing. Suguru had refused to acknowledge his issues when he was with you, no matter how many times you tried to sit him down and get it out. He’d change the subject and move on.
He’d sweet-talk you, making you forget why you had been so concerned in the first place because there, for a fleeting moment, was the boy you had fallen in love with two years prior. He’d fill your mind with nothing but good things, pretty noises, good feelings. Not stopping until his name was all you could utter, not stopping until you fell asleep in his arms, content and sedated. He was a master at avoidance, trying so hard to keep things perfect just for you. You were beginning to hate him for it, but even the idea of hating him made bile burn your throat.
You were left in emotional turmoil, love mixing with hate mixing with rage and depression. No matter how many times the word hate flashed through your mind, it was never truly directed at Suguru. Rather the jujutsu world, the things they had forced upon him, the pressure he had been made to feel. You especially felt that bubbling hate for a certain man by the name of Fushiguro Toji, who caused this whole spiral. He was long gone now, Satoru had effectively put the man down and he would not be getting back up. Though it killed you to no end that he got the easy way out. You almost wished that Satoru had kept the man alive.
You couldn’t stomach it as your back pressed into the cold wall of your bathroom, arms folded over your chest as you stared at nothing in particular. Eyes refusing to focus on anything of importance but making a point to avoid the developing test on the counter.
Suguru had left you a note, shortly after his final conversation with Satoru. You had returned to your dorm to see it on your bed and you recognized his handwriting before you even read your name on the envelope. You could still feel your hands trembling as you ripped the paper, flinching as it cut your skin, crumbling as tears dripped down your cheeks. You read it three times before finally comprehending the words, the paper littered with tear drops and your blood. Every word was written with care, you could hear his voice as your eyes passed over each sentence, see his face before you as if he was speaking.
It was an apology, his resolve and a goodbye all in one. Leaving you more empty than you had felt before. Still, it sat on your nightstand, you couldn’t throw it away. As if his sweaters weren’t still hanging in your closet, like the blanket he got you wasn’t still sitting on your bed. You held onto that letter like it was the last thing you had of him. Mourning him as if he had died, like he wasn’t still alive and breathing and walking around within the very city you were in now. You almost thought it would be easier if he had died. At least you’d feel some sort of closure, knowing he’s not coming back. But this, this was a form of torture for you.
To know that you could bump into him at a restaurant, or even pass him on a busy street. He wasn’t gone, if anything he was doing better than he ever was. Leaving you, Satoru, Shoko, and everyone else behind to pick up the shattered pieces. Still, you couldn’t hate him for that. No amount of anger would mend the torn pieces of your broken heart. You were fairly certain nothing would, the only cure was the one man you could no longer call your own. You’d spend the rest of your life with your heart ripped wide, an empty void filling the space.
You inhaled deeply, pushing off the bathroom wall and taking a hesitant step towards the counter. The test was upside down, you couldn’t see the small little window that would show you the results, for a moment you wanted to pick it up and throw it in the trash without even looking. There was nothing stopping you from doing so either, but you held back anyways. The only reason you were taking a pregnancy test in the first place was because your period was two weeks late. You could easily chalk it up to stress, but at the same time you knew all too well that you and Suguru often went without protection. Idiot.
Somehow, despite his inner battles, Suguru’s sex drive never slowed down. Maybe it was the craving for physical touch or maybe sex was a great way for him to forget about his issues for a while. Regardless, you had always been eager to oblige, even if it meant falling into his traps and luring your attention away from the real issue at hand. You had no idea how long it had been and if the damn thing was positive you were sure it would show up by now. So you picked it up and flipped it over in your hand, tired eyes scanning it. Your forehead creased for a moment, eyes squinting in frustration because you couldn’t tell if there was a second line or not.
If it’s positive, it's too early to tell. Your grip tightens around the small plastic test, anger flooding your heart as you chuck it in the trash can with such force it rattles as it hits the wall. Once again you are left with uncertainty. It seemed nobody could give you a straight answer anymore. Truth be told, you weren’t sure what you wanted that test to say. The thought of being pregnant with his child would have elated you two months ago. Now the thought made your insides twist and turn, for a moment you thought you were going to puke again. At the very same time, the idea of the test being negative felt like a rug being pulled out from under you.
As if you didn’t know that feeling well enough.
In a twisted way, you thought that being pregnant would bring him back to you. As if it would erase every heinous crime he had committed and bring the man you loved back into your arms. You were foolish, but not foolish enough to really believe in those daydreams. You hauled yourself out of your bathroom and back into your dorm room, falling into your disheveled bed with a soft thump. His t-shirt was hanging loosely on your body, it still smells faintly of him. It’s the only shirt of his that you’d been wearing, too afraid to lose his scent on the others.
It was still early enough for you to sleep for a few more hours before Shoko was knocking on your door and hauling you into the world. You hated it, but she assured you that you’d thank her for it in a couple months. You doubted it, and for some reason you felt like she did too.
Your sleep was dreamless, it had been since Suguru left you. You weren’t quite sure if you were thankful for that or not. Suguru was still the last thing you thought about before falling asleep and the first thing you thought of when you woke up. His absence consumed your every thought, impossible to ignore, unable to forget. There had been a few tough nights where you dragged yourself down the hall towards Satoru’s room. The man was usually still up, sitting on his bed with a book in hand that you could tell he wasn’t reading. Just an attempt at distraction.
He welcomes you without a word, scooting over a bit so you could sit beside him, head on his shoulder as he tosses the book to the floor. You remain like that until you fall asleep, no words spoken but nothing needed to be verbalized to understand you were both mourning the loss of a man who wasn’t even dead. In an odd way, you felt as if you were mourning Satoru as well. His smile, his jokes, the way his eyes seemed to sparkle, all of those things had dwindled. To his credit, he was managing to pull himself back together, at least better than you had been.
A harsh knock at your door signaled that Shoko was there. You hadn’t even realized that you fell asleep, but you felt even more groggy than you had a couple hours prior. “I’m up.” It’s hoarse and unconvincing but you hear Shoko utter a small “ok”. You know she’s still there, she always waits for you to get dressed and emerge from your room yourself. If you make her wait any longer than fifteen minutes she's usually barging in herself to pull you from your bed. Your body aches as you sit up, stumbling across the room to the bathroom because you need to pee yet again.
The air almost feels stale as you get your routine done in the bathroom, the test is still sitting in the small can beside your sink. It’s presence is heavy, to the point you question if you should take it out with you despite only having a couple tissues accompanying it. You decided against it when she knocked again. “Just getting dressed.” You mumbled softly, listening for her small “Hmph.” At least letting you know she heard you. Your uniform still felt foreign on your skin, it had for the last three weeks but you tried to ignore it. “About time.” Shoko smiled as you emerged, Satoru beside her. “Oh? You’re both here?” Your tone was questioning but not mad.
“Yeah, Yaga said we should take the day to be normal or something like that.” Satoru drawled, circular glasses sliding down his nose as he rolled his eyes. “Us? Normal?” You snorted, pulling your door shut as Shoko began walking down the hallway. “He just doesn’t know what to do with us at the moment.” Satoru offered in a low tone, Shoko would scold him for speaking like that, especially to you. The thing is, he wasn’t saying anything that you hadn’t already thought of yourself. “I don’t know what to do with us either.” You could assume Yaga was being vigilant, the guilt of not seeing what was happening with Suguru was weighing on him too.
The flick of Shoko’s lighter was heard as you stepped into the morning air, laughter bubbling in your chest as you looked at her. “It was killing you, wasn’t it.” Yaga had been cracking down on her bad habit, trying to limit her by saying no smoking in the dorms. “Just a little.” She teased back, inhaling deeply before blowing the gray smoke past her lips. “Shoko, gimme one.” Your eyebrow cocked as Satoru stuck his hand out. Her eyes met you for a moment before begrudgingly handing the lighter and pack to him. “New habit?” You commented softly, watching as he stuck a cylinder between his lips and held his hand up to block the flame from the wind.
Satoru shrugged, inhaling a bit before blowing out, moving to hand the pack to you. You hesitated, the test in your dorm trash can still lingering in the back of your mind. “I’m good.” You took them anyway, handing them to Shoko. Neither of them said anything but they shared a knowing glance, they couldn’t be mad at you for trying to quit a bad habit. “So where are we going?” You didn’t like the prolonged silence as the two of them puffed away. “I didn’t think you’d want to go anywhere, but if you want we can go get breakfast.” Shoko’s eyes flickered over both you and Satoru, as if she was looking at two temperamental children.
“Breakfast sounds good.” Satoru offered, shoving one hand in his pocket while the other plucked the cig from his lips. “It does.” You added softly, stomach turning at the very thought of food but you couldn’t let them know that. You had lost your appetite shortly after he left, but you still forced yourself to eat at least one substantial meal a day. The nausea that had settled in your gut most days usually deterred you from anything else but plain rice and maybe some soup. Still, it was food and the only thing you could keep down at that. “Alright, I’ll call for a driver and we can go get something to eat.” Shoko pulled out her phone, clicking on a number she saved.
“You’ve been eating, right?” You jumped a little, eyes sliding over to Satoru. His tone was low, just low enough for only you to hear. “Yeah, I’ve been eating… you?” He looked the same, tall and lean with broad shoulders. Satoru nodded, pushing his glasses up to sit on the bridge of his nose. “The car will be at the gates for us in five minutes so let's get going.” Shoko started walking, like always you and Satoru followed behind her like ducklings. Satoru’s question still lingered in your mind, his ability to read your thoughts nearly rivaled Suguru.
You had to wonder just how much those six eyes of his could see.
The three of you clamored into the car, Satoru taking the passenger seat while you and Shoko took the back. You had no idea where you were going, not even when Shoko gave an address to the driver. It was somewhere in the city, you knew that much, but you trusted her judgment and prayed they would have something plain for your stomach. None of you spoke as the car barreled forward, your eyes glued to the surroundings zipping past you, as if you’d catch him walking down the street on a busy morning. You knew you’d always be looking for him, everywhere you went, your eyes would search for him.
You tore your eyes from the window, glancing at Satoru in the passenger seat. You couldn’t see his eyes, but his head was turned towards the window. If you had to guess, he was doing the very same thing. Looking for someone who would never appear. Unless you were Shoko of course, you still felt your throat tighten at the thought. You knew Suguru had chosen to reveal himself to her for a couple reasons. One being that she wasn’t nearly strong enough to take him down single handedly. The other being her easy going nature, he knew there would be little to no conflict or questions to answer with her. If roles were reversed, you’d do the same.
“Hello?” You blinked, looking at Shoko with parted lips. “You okay?” her head tilted, brown eyes lingering over your features. “I… yeah.” You swallowed, the car was still moving so you didn’t space out for that long. “What are you in the mood to eat?” She repeated the question she had asked seconds prior while you were clearly on another plane of existence. “Something plain.” You offered lamely, hands clasping together in your lap. “Plain?” Satoru questioned, eyes shifting to look at you through the rearview mirror. “My stomach has been sensitive. Plain foods are all I can really get down right now.” You shrunk into the seat.
Shoko hummed, eyes observing you intently now. You could almost hear her silently listing all of your physical symptoms, noting in her head the various things that could cause them. Most could be answered with heartbreak, but that didn’t typically make you sensitive to certain foods. Shoko and Satoru knew of Suguru's relationship with you. They knew you were serious about each other, that you often slept in the other’s dorm depending on the day. They knew you went on dates and bought each other gifts. They knew you had long since confessed your love to one another and were not strangers to holding hands when you thought nobody was looking.
It didn’t take a genius to figure out that the two of you slept together as well.
~
“Quiet.” You sunk your teeth into the side of your cheek, struggling to stifle your noises as Suguru’s fingers curled inside of your tight heat. “You don’t want them to hear us, right?” he cooed again, lips ghosting the shell of your ear as he pressed you harder into the empty desk, nearly pushing it into the wall of the classroom with the ferocity of his hunger.
You shook your head, not trusting your voice in that moment to make any coherent sounds. Your nails dug into his bicep, legs splayed hazardously over the sides of the desk as you used your free hand to brace yourself. Two fingers continued to plunge in and out of you, curling perfectly and sucking the air from your lungs as he found that one particular spot.
Suguru watched in fascination, dark eyes glazed over as they flickered between his hand and your face. Each draw back revealed the slick shine of your arousal on his digits, each push forward was accompanied by a squelch. It made his throat tight, arousal making him feel hot all over as he continued to fuck you with his fingers.
“Sugu…” You choked, face warming considerably as you realized how desperate you sounded. “Hmm?” a gentle hum, his fingers burying deep and massaging your walls until your thighs twitched. “I need you.” Your head fell back, hand leaving his bicep to slap over your mouth in an attempt to silence the cry that left you. “You…need me?”
Those words were jarring to him, as if a chain of firecrackers had been ignited under his skin. You nodded, helpless and at his mercy as you prayed Satoru and Shoko wouldn’t wander off to figure out where the two of you had gone. You couldn’t quite comprehend what happened next, the sudden retreat of his fingers left you feeling empty, clearing your foggy mind for a second.
They were quickly replaced with something else, something wet and soft. Your eyes widened considerably when you looked down to see Suguru on his knees, hands gripping the plush of your thighs with his face buried between. He would have given you more if it weren't for his damn pants, he was too impatient to struggle with the high waisted fashion choices he made.
You couldn’t think again, mind immediately fogging over as you focused solely on Suguru’s head between your legs. The flat of his tongue licking up your folds before delving further, bumping your clit with his nose and earning a strangled noise from you. You bit down on your fist now, not hard enough to draw blood but enough to silence yourself for a bit.
Suguru didn’t mind, if anything he wanted them to hear you. He wanted to see the shocked look on Satoru’s face when he realized what was happening. He couldn’t lie, this whole rendezvous had started because of an offhand comment Satoru made. One about how he was likely better at pleasing women than Suguru. You knew that's why you were in here too, you felt like you needed to thank Satoru for pushing Suguru to this point, whether that was his intention or not.
Heat continued to build in your gut, if you could trust yourself to stay balanced you would have let go of the desk and buried your hand in his hair. You wanted to tug the silky black locks from the confines of the bun he always kept them in, watch them cascade around his handsome face and turn messy because of your fingers. Then again, that may make it a little too obvious to your two awaiting friends. “Sugu…”
You gasped, hand flying from your mouth to grab the desk as you nearly lost your balance. Suguru had started to stand, knocking you back as his arms wrapped around your lower half in a bear hug. Suguru was standing at his full height now, your knees bent over his shoulders while only your mid-back and shoulders pressed into the desk. You could have melted into a puddle the moment his eyes met yours, his mouth still pressed firmly to your cunt.
“Suguru…” You choked again, hands moving to grip the sides of the desk for some kind of grounding. You could feel him smirk, eyes burning into yours as his tongue lavished you. It was all too much, too lewd, too risky. Your orgasm was building faster than you anticipated, the tingling arousal shooting down your spine and making your legs tense as he teased you. You came with a choked cry of his name, eyes squeezing shut as you rode out your orgasm.
~
“We’re here.” You blinked, eyes scanning your surroundings as Satoru got out of the car. “Are you sure you’re okay? We can get the food to go and head back to campus.” Shoko’s words were out of concern but her tone was still relaxed. “I’m alright, I could use some time in a busy space.” You lied, the quiet of your dorm room had never sounded so inviting. “Thank you.” You muttered softly to the driver, his small smile told you he was well aware of what was going on. Satoru was already by the front door of the cafe, putting out the butt of his cigarette on a nearby trash can before dropping it in. Shoko did the same, following after you as you entered.
Satoru’s looks tended to come in handy, his glasses sliding down his nose to show the startling blue of his eyes was all that was needed to get the three of you a seat and bypass the wait. “At least you’re good for something.” You teased him, watching him roll his eyes before smiling. “It’s my duty to get the two of you quick service and good food, even if I have to whore myself out.” For some reason, that had laughter bubbling in your chest, the genuine kind. “Such a noble sacrifice.” You laughed, the menu in your hand shaking as your shoulders bounced. You were too distracted to see the way Satoru’s shoulders seemed to sag in relief as he watched you, for a moment it was like nothing had changed.
If it weren't for the gaping, empty space in the booth beside him, he would have been convinced.
“What are you going to get, Shoko?” She was the only one actively looking over the menu. “I’m not sure yet, but they do have some options that would be easy on your stomach.” You weren’t sure why but it made your heart ache just a bit, she had been more concerned over your meal than her own. At the very same time, it made you feel small, like you were a bit of a nuisance for having stomach issues… or whatever they were… in the first place. “Oh, alright.” You focused on the menu, aware of their eyes on you as you tried to find something small but appealing. You settled on tamagoyaki and asked for it to be made on the salty side rather than sweet.
Shoko went for a traditional meal as well while Satoru ventured into their “western” cuisine. His choice sounded so sweet that the thought of it made your teeth hurt. “I don’t know how you do it, Satoru.” you sipped your tea slowly, letting the hot liquid slide down your throat and settle in your stomach. He only shrugged, smiling softly “I’ve yet to find something too sweet for me to handle.” Normally he would have added something flirty but he decided against it. Despite knowing you and Suguru were a couple, it never stopped Satoru’s flirtatious comments. It only bothered Suguru a little bit but he knew his best friend would never cross that kind of line.
“You may go into cardiac arrest before you meet your match, Satoru.” Shoko snorted, sipping her coffee as she took in the surroundings of the busy cafe. For a moment, you wondered if she was doing what you and Satoru had been subconsciously doing for the last three weeks. “I keep waiting for him to appear.” Your tone was just barely above a whisper, as if even bringing up his existence would cause the world to implode around you. “Me too.” Shoko spoke softly, eyes still looking anywhere but the two of you. Satoru kept quiet, face unusually somber as he sipped his coffee. “I think I’ll eventually go insane.”
You tried to sound lighthearted but the crack in your voice gave the opposite effect.
Satoru’s eyes flickered up at that, making your shoulders shrink into the booth. You had quickly come to learn that both of your friends were treating you like fragile porcelain. Though you partially felt the same when talking to them, especially Satoru. Despite the frequent and long nights with each other, little to no words were ever spoken. “I’m fine.” You tried, voice a little stronger than before. “We can talk about these things without falling apart.” It sounded like you were trying to convince yourself more than them. Before anyone could speak, the waiter was walking over with your food, effectively stopping any further discussion.
“Satoru…” You choked as the waiter walked away, eyes focused on the sugary, gooey concoction on the plate before him. “That’s your ticket to the ER.” Shoko was gawking at it too, a bite of food already halfway to her mouth. Satoru, on the other hand, looked like a kid on christmas morning, glasses sliding down his nose with a smile on his face. Your stomach grumbled as he cut into the pancakes, the feeling making you jump just a bit. You actually felt hungry, mouth watering as you looked down at your own plate and moved to take a bite.
Silence fell over the table as you all ate, within minutes half of your food was gone and you were quietly wishing you had ordered something a little bigger.
“You need a napkin.” You laughed softly, handing Satoru your spare napkin so he could wipe the syrup off of his cheek. “Thanks.” For some reason you couldn't help but think he looked like a little kid. For another reason you couldn’t quite explain, it made sadness sink into your shoulders. He should be here with the three of you, eating and laughing and bringing you the comfort you always looked for in him. Your hands shook as you moved to eat more, not willing to let the surge of emotion get rid of the appetite you rarely had nowadays.
As you finished your plate, you felt the bubbling wave of nausea build in your stomach. You inhaled slowly, trying to find a way to ease your worries and keep your food down. “Are you okay? You look a little green.” Shoko eyed you with concern, not even a second later Satoru was signaling the waiter for the check. “Y-yeah… told you my stomach was sensitive. That’s the most I've eaten at once in the last three weeks.” You couldn’t stand the embarrassment of making a scene or wasting money on the food you had just consumed. “I’ll be back.” You slipped out of the booth, your friend’s concerned eyes zeroing in on you as you disappeared for the bathroom.
Luckily for you the bathroom was empty, the fluorescent lights making you flinch as you stumbled to the sink and turned the water on cold. You leaned over it, hands and wrists submerged under the running stream, chest heaving with the effort to remain calm. You were desperate to keep the food down, so desperate you could feel sweat forming on your temple as you tried to focus on anything but the nausea. Suguru’s face flashed through your mind and for a moment you were convinced your knees would give out from under you.
~
“I told you to take it easy.” He huffs softly, fingers running through your hair as he rakes it away from your face. Carefully, he’s looping one of his elastics around your hair to keep it in place. Your head is still buried in the toilet, you had just finished throwing up for the third time in the last hour. “Are you still with me?” His hand is on your back now, rubbing slow but deliberate circles. Feebly you give him a thumbs up, throat burning from the sting of alcohol coming back up.
“You didn’t eat much today and then you went and got shit-faced with Shoko.” Suguru stated the obvious, trying not to scold you because he knew you weren’t doing good right now. “I don’t think you have anything else to puke up, do you want some water?” You lifted your head now, reaching for toilet paper to wipe your mouth. “Water sounds good.” Your voice was weaker than Suguru had expected it to sound, his heart aching a bit as he sat beside you on the bathroom floor.
“I’ll be right back, okay? Just yell if you get scared and I’ll be by your side before you know it.” You nodded, thanking him softly as he got up and disappeared out of your bathroom. You were only seventeen at the time, acting far older than you were and thinking you could get away with it. Now, you are facing the consequences of being naive. Typical for someone your age. Suguru had returned in under two minutes, handing you a glass of room temperature water. “It’ll be easier on your stomach at this temperature.” He chuckled as you grimaced.
He moved to grab a washcloth from your cabinet, turning the sink water on cold. “And this…” he wrung it out twice before turning off the water “will help focus your attention on something other than the nausea.” He placed the cloth on the back of your neck, watching your shoulders sag in relief as something finally cooled your clammy skin. “Thanks, Sugu.”
~
“Sugu… I’m scared.” Your voice was barely audible, tears burning your eyes as you squeezed them shut. Somehow it was working, your pain outshining the nausea as you tried to stop yourself from sobbing in the middle of the restroom. A year had passed since that moment in time, you were only eighteen now and yet you felt as if you had grown a decade. Yet, you were reduced to a scared and crying child because of nausea. Get it together. You forced yourself to straighten, hands slightly numb under the current of cold water.
You forced yourself to make eye contact with your reflection, observing how stark the dark circles were under your eyes. Shoko had been right, you did look a bit green, but it was fading steadily as everything subsided. You let your hands sit under the water for a minute longer before bending over the sink and splashing some on your face. The door to the restroom opened as you straightened again, Shoko was looking at you with worry. “Did you get sick?” you shook your head, turning the water off and reaching for the paper towels.
“Managed to fight it off… for now.”
“Satoru paid already, there is a convenient store a couple shops down. We can get you some nausea meds and a barf bag for the ride back… just in case.” You nodded, smiling a bit. “That would probably be a good idea.” you followed her out of the bathroom and through the restaurant, Satoru was standing on the sidewalk with a new cigarette between his lips. “Damn, you really did develop a new habit.” He only shrugged, inhaling deeply before blowing more out. “I’ll get over it at some point.” Knowing him and his will-power, he probably would.
“I’ll call for the driver, Satoru take her to the convenient store and I’ll catch up.” Satoru nodded, saluting her with a quick “yes ma’am” before grabbing your hand and dragging you along. You didn’t speak until Shoko was out of earshot. “Do you think it’s going to get better?” You appreciated the weight of his hand in yours, though you were certain he could feel how clammy it was. “I think it’ll get more bearable with time.” not better, but tolerable. The thought had your chest feeling heavy as you stepped inside of the small store.
“Nausea meds and barf bags.” Satoru chuckled, reading the signs above each aisle until he spotted one that seemed like a good start. “You’ll have to see a doctor if this doesn’t ease up… how long has it been going on anyways?” You shuffled behind him, arms crossing due to him letting them go a moment prior. “Shortly after he left, after I found the letter.” Only Satoru knew about the letter that had been left behind. How Suguru managed to get back onto campus and leave it in your dorm was beyond him. You had even let him read it, breaking his heart again.
“Shoko!” Satoru called, noticing her walk down the aisle before you could even turn your head. “I’m not good with this stuff, what should we get?” Satoru had already grabbed a box of blue cylindrical barf bags for you but the actual meds were basically foreign to him. “I’ll handle it from here, Satoru. You can wait in the car, he should be upfront by now.” Satoru’s brows furrowed, so did yours, but the look in Shoko’s eyes had him shrugging and handing the box to you. “Alright then, I’ll see ya out there.”
He whistled as he strolled by, your eyes narrowing on Shoko. “What’s this about?” you watched her shuffle through the shelves, picking up one and reading the box before setting it down and moving onto the next. “I don’t know what you mean.” She commented offhandedly, plucking another box and reading it before sighing. “This one should work.” She turned, handing it to you while motioning you to follow her down the aisle. You read it over, nothing out of the ordinary so you truly couldn’t figure out what made this one different from the others.
You stopped short when Shoko did, eyes scanning the aisle and feeling your stomach drop. “Shoko–” You sighed, she was standing in front of the pregnancy tests. “Listen, I know it’s probably the last thing you want to even think about but I think you should take one.” She was grabbing a box of the cheap tests, the same test that was still residing in the trash can of your bathroom. “Shoko, it's not necessary.” You couldn't bring yourself to tell her you already took one, for some reason you couldn’t tell her it was negative either.
“I’ll buy them, and you’ll keep them. If this nausea doesn’t subside in like two weeks, I’m forcing you to take them.” You felt your face burning, clutching the nausea meds tightly in your hands as you looked away from her. “Fine.” You sighed, head tilted at her shoes as you followed her up front to the register. Everything was placed neatly in a brown bag so nobody could see the contents. Once in the car, you popped open the barf bags just to keep one ready in the event your nausea returned full force. “I figured you would forget this.”
You looked up to see Satoru handing you a bottle of water, your lips parting in surprise. “You know me well, Satoru. I did forget.” you took it from him, grabbing the box of nausea meds and ripping them open. You took them and sighed, gulping down water when you realized how thirsty you had been. “If we have nothing else to do today, I think I’ll take a nap.” You were aching for your bed, more tired now than you had been after any missions. “Alright but we’ll wake you up for dinner if we don’t hear from you.” Shoko smiled, cracking the window to light a cig.
“It’s not even 11am yet.” you snorted. “Yeah but you can sleep like the dead when you really need it, if we don’t wake you, you’ll sleep straight through till tomorrow.” You opened your mouth to deny it, about to use your frequent bathroom breaks as an excuse but stopped yourself. Saying that would only confirm the very thing Shoko was suspicious of. “Alright, fine, whatever.” You resigned with a playful huff, arms crossing as you turned to look out the window. Luckily for you, you managed to make it through the ride without needing to use the bag.
“I’ll see you later.” You called after them, waving as you headed for the dorms. They both waved back, finding shade under a tree to enjoy more of the sunny morning. You felt your shoulders sagging with each step, your social battery diminished far faster now that Suguru wasn’t always by your side. You had almost grown a bit too dependent on him, thinking he would be a constant in your life. You inhaled shakily, the brown bag crumbling between your fingers as your emotions bubbled to the surface yet again. You couldn't seem to get yourself to your dorm fast enough, hot tears slipping down your cheeks as you shoved the key in the lock.
It came in heavy waves, making you feel weak as you could only succumb to the sadness festering in your chest. You dropped the bag by the door, kicking off your shoes and shouldering off your uniform jacket. Moving on autopilot, you drew your curtains shut and took off the rest of your clothing, sliding his shirt over your head until you were enveloped in his scent. You were gasping for air by the time your body hit the mattress, curling in on yourself as you sobbed. “I miss you.” You hiccuped, rubbing your eyes as if it would stop the tears.
God dammit, Suguru, why did you have to do this?
You buried your head in your pillow, trying to drown out your own feelings before sadness turned to anger and you ripped your whole room apart because of it.
~
“Stop wiggling so much.” His voice sounded like gravel, rumbling the back of your head as he spoke. “Can’t help it.” You retorted, trying your best to settle into a comfortable position. Suguru had you wrapped in a bear hug, his favorite form of affection, especially since he knew you couldn’t get out of his grasp. His arms were covered in thick muscles, something you initially didn't expect because his uniform and choice of baggy clothing typically hid them.
You could use all your strength and his grip wouldn’t falter.
“Why not?” he mumbled again, if you had to guess, his eyes were closed as he spoke. “Cause it’s warm, Sugu.” you were both laying on top of the covers, little to no clothing on because of the heat and the broken air conditioning that the school was still trying to fix. Nothing but an old fan swiveling side to side to create some sort of relief. Still, Suguru couldn’t sleep unless you were pressed flush to him, warm or not. “It’s not that bad.”
“Oh it absolutely is.” you immediately countered, turning your head back to try and look at him. “It could be way worse.” he tried again, fingers thrumming against your side. “Yeah, it could, but it could also be better. Like if you let me go for example.” You wiggled a bit, trying to create space before he pulled you tightly to him again. “Nice try, it’s not happening.” You groaned, going limp in his arms as he began to laugh. “I could totally make it worse for you.” He added softly, lips ghosting your ear. Despite the heat, you shivered.
“The weirdest things turn you on, Sugu.”
“Hey, it’s not nice to call yourself weird.”
You slapped his arm, earning another rumble of laughter as he moved to hover over you. “C’mon, if I make you sweat, it’ll make the breeze from the fan feel colder.” You rolled your eyes, studying his features as he looked down at you, hair framing his face and ghosting yours. “That’s counterproductive, you know.” Your hands were running up his biceps anyway, moving to wrap around his neck and pull him close to you. “Maybe it is, but you can’t say I’m wrong.”
His head was lowering, giving into your pull with no hesitation. “You’re right, I can’t say you’re wrong. But… I want to.” You smile, pulling him further until your lips melt together. He was radiating warmth, his teeth grazing your bottom lip to ask for entrance. Your lips parted, hands snaking up into his hair and tugging at the strands until he groaned. Suguru braced himself on one hand, making the mattress dip just by your head. The rest of his weight was settled on his knees, caging your hips in so you truly couldn’t get away from him. Not that you wanted too now.
You felt small beneath him, his bare skin radiating warmth as he used his free hand to push your shirt up. You could ignore the heat for the time being, more focused on the steady beating from between your thighs. “Sugu…” You parted with a gasp, watching him lean up and pull you with him, allowing him to drag your shirt over your head and toss it to the floor before pushing you down again. His lips didn’t return to yours, instead they moved to your neck, kissing along your pulse point until you were whining. “Quiet, baby, don’t forget we’re in my room.”
Satoru was asleep next door, that realization set in like ice water being dumped over your head. “Suguru.” You choked as his head dipped lower, licking along your collarbone before moving to one of your breasts. He wasn’t going to answer you, and you knew that for a fact by the way his lips curled into a smirk against your skin. “You’re evil.” You gasped, hand fisting his hair tightly as he scraped his teeth along your breast, nipping at the soft skin. Your other hand found its home on his shoulder, nails scratching lightly as his muscles flexed under your grasp.
You sunk your teeth into your cheek when his lips wrapped around your perked nipple, arousal making it pebble slightly as he sucked. Suguru’s tongue lavished your skin, flicking the bud until your back was arching into his touch. It wasn’t nearly enough, your breath coming out in short pants as you tried to pry him off and focus on your other breast. “These would look so pretty if they were full of milk.” You choked, eyes wide as he looked up at you through his lashes. “Don’t you think?” You couldn’t breathe for a moment, stunned into silence by his comment.
“C’mon baby, don’t act so shocked.” He cooed softly, the tip of his tongue trailing up your sternum. He didn’t stop until he reached your lips, kissing them softly before dipping his head again. His hand toyed with the breast he had just teased endlessly, brown eyes observing the rate of your breathing before lowering onto your other breast. He repeated the same motions, nipping and sucking the senstive skin until you were squirming from the wetness between your legs.
“You haven't answered me, sweetheart.”
“B-because I don’t know how to answer that, Sugu.” You knew exactly what he was implying, but you couldn’t form a coherent response for him. “You just have to tell me if you agree, it’s pretty simple.” He chuckled, pushing himself up to look down at you. Your hands fell to your sides, his neck just out of your reach. “Just think about it, pretty girl.” You watched him, completely entranced as he pulled his briefs down and his erection sprang free. “Because I’ve been thinking about it a lot.”
“You have?” You sat up a bit, fingers shakily pulling off your own underwear to save time. “I have.” He confirmed, cheeks turning a shade of red that you could see even in the moonlight. His hand slid along his length, spreading the precum drooling from his tip while his boxers rested at his mid-thigh. “Take those off, Sugu.” You smiled a bit, reaching for the waistband and pulling them taut before letting them snap back against his thigh. “So demanding.” He snorted, letting himself go to push the material off, tossing it to the floor just as you had done with your underwear.
“So are you, demanding an answer for something so…so…” you couldn’t find the right words, not when his eyes were on you, devouring you whole. “…so what? How does it make you feel?” He redirected, pumping himself leisurely as your thighs fell open for him, still supporting yourself on your elbows as you waited. “How does what make me feel?” A stupid question but you were still reeling from the initial statement. Suguru laughed, hand still gliding over his length as he sat on his knees.
“How does it feel knowing I think about getting you pregnant… all the fucking time.” You couldn’t deny the thought made you feel hot, hotter than you felt from the heat and arousal mixing. Like molten lava was running its way through your bloodstream. “F-feels fucking…” you squirmed a bit, legs moving to close involuntarily until his hand shot out and stopped them. “Go on, pretty girl. Tell me.” You sat up, glaring at him with warm cheeks. “How about you fuck me. Then, maybe, I’ll tell you how I feel about your little fantasies.” Suguru groaned, head falling forward for a moment.
“Sounds like a good deal to me.” He moved forward, pressing you back into the mattress as he pulled your thighs towards him. Your lips found his neck, sucking on it harshly as he ran the dull head of his cock between your slick folds. You let him move you however he pleased, your legs being pushed almost painfully to your chest as he pressed into you. You gasped in unison, his cock stretching you open easily despite no prep. “Shit…” his head fell forward again, nearly bumping yours as he bottomed out, no space left between the two of you.
Suguru stayed in place, eyes shut as he focused on the way your walls fluttered and squeezed around him, unable to stay still. Your nails dug into his scalp, pulling a groan from his lips as you tried to relax but couldn’t. He was big, bigger than any fling or partner you had in the past. No matter how easily your cunt accepted him, it still stung for the first few seconds. You had grown to love the deep ache, the weight of him inside you, the way his tip would brush your cervix depending on the position. Like now, with your legs pressed so tightly to your body.
“Can I move?” his voice was soft, eyes peering into your own once he gained his composure. “Y-yeah.” You breathed out, the feeling of his hands on your skin still sent shockwaves of arousal through you. Especially when his grip tightened, bracing himself on you as he drew his hips back half way before rolling into you again. You moaned, eyes squeezing shut as Suguru found his rhythm, hips meeting yours with a soft slap. “D-Don’t forget Satoru is…” You wailed softly, pleasure building quickly as he moved. “I know…”
But the smirk on his face told you he no longer cared, he’d gladly listen to his white-haired best friend bitch and moan in the morning about being woken up by you. Suguru’s rhythm only sped up, hips angling perfectly to brush along that one particular spot as he thrust into you, cock head brushing your cervix every few thrusts until your vision was blurring. The pleasure ebbing through your body was more than enough to block out how uncomfortable your current position was.
A wet squelch started to emit between your legs, loud enough to be heard over the drone of the fan as Suguru pounded into you. “So…” he started, voice strained as sweat dripped down his temple. “... can you tell me how it makes you feel now?” You blinked, awestruck that he was still hooked on getting an answer from you. “S-suguru…” you whined, head falling further into the pillows. “I’m not letting it go…ha… Tell me how it makes you feel.” he ground out, hips slowing just a bit. When you didn’t speak, he pressed more of his weight into you so one hand could break free.
You moaned, loud and unrestrained as his fingers ghosted across your swollen clit, the sudden contact making you see stars. “Tell me how it makes you feel.” he repeated, watching your face go slack as his fingers and hips worked in tandem. “Makes me hot…” You admitted with a heavy breath, eyes struggling to focus on him. “I want you to do it, Sugu… fuck me till I’m pregnant.” The look on his face had you shrinking further into the mattress, an almost animalistic look taking over his eyes as he stopped moving all together. “Say it again.”
“I want you to fuck me ‘til I’m pregnant, Suguru.”
~
You woke up in a sweat, gasping for air as you stumbled out of bed and barreled to the bathroom. You couldn’t stop the nausea this time, knees hitting the tile floor with bruising force as you heaved into the toilet. You hadn’t even remembered falling asleep, but your dream was enough to send you into a death spiral. Tears burned your eyes as the little bit of breakfast you hadn’t digested came back up. Luckily for you, you had slept long enough that your food from this morning wasn’t a total loss. Nothing more than bile was left as you finally calmed down.
You reached for toilet paper, wiping your tears and blowing your nose until you could at least breath without difficulty. Aching, you got up, flushing the toilet and washing your hands and face. You had no idea what time it was but you assumed it wasn’t late enough for dinner if Shoko never came to wake you up. At least that’s what you thought as you stumbled back into your dorm room slightly sweaty. That’s odd… The sun had begun to set just beyond your window, your eyes flickering to your alarm clock. 7:23pm stared back at you in big red numbers.
I slept for over eight hours? You looked for your phone, seeing the missed text from Shoko.
Shoko: I decided against waking you up, I figured you could use the sleep. Just text me when you’re awake and I can bring you dinner
You were partially grateful for her decision, your face still warm as your dream lingered in your mind. Dreaming of the past, how cliche. You sighed, sitting on the edge of your bed. You had woken up so suddenly, adrenaline blocking out the sleepiness at first. Now, your body seemed to thrum with a dull ache, the headrush coming back around to kick you while you were down. You reached over to turn on the small lap residing on your nightstand, eyes squinting for a moment as you adjusted. Your eyes focused on the brown bag from earlier, the one you discarded on your floor after coming back.
You knew there was water in there still, so you got up and grabbed it, looking at the bag contents in disdain. You emptied it on your desk, nausea meds, barf bags and the box of pregnancy tests. You studied then as you gulped down some of the water, easing the burn in your throat. The pregnancy tests Shoko had insisted on were identical to the one you took this morning. Weirdly enough you wished she had grabbed the more expensive digital ones. That way you wouldn't have to strain yourself trying to figure out if a second line was present or not.
“Fuck it.” you sighed, dropping the now empty water bottle in the small barrel you kept beside your desk. You still had one more test in the box from this morning, you’d take another one just because of the memories lingering on your mind. Your face felt warm as you recalled that particular night from a few months back. Suguru had been pretty adamant after that, fucking you raw and in ernest with every intention of knocking you up. You, stupidly, let him because you love him and loved the idea of having a family with him. “Idiot.”
You scolded yourself again, ripping the foil wrapper and tossing it in your trash with the now empty box. You went through the same process as you did that morning, peeing into a cup and dipping the absorbent end into it for ten seconds before capping it and discarding the rest of the contents. You forced yourself to leave the bathroom this time, convinced it would make time go by faster. The text Shoko had sent was still left unanswered, you couldn’t even bring yourself to feel hungry at that moment in time.
You’d text her in a little while though, or else she’d likely come breaking your door down thinking you had run away. Just then, your phone vibrated with the ringtone you had set for Satoru. You grabbed it, flipping it open to see what he had to say. On the screen there was a message from him, asking if you wanted to hang out on the rooftop to watch the stars later on. You smiled a bit, it was rare for Satoru to ask things so formally. You clicked out a message, telling him yes and that you could use some fresh air.
It took him no time at all to send a happy emoticon, one that had you rolling your eyes as you typed back that you’d meet him at his dorm when you were ready. You backed out of the chat, eyes lingering on a particular contact, your message to him was naturally left unanswered. You had given up texting Suguru’s number when the messages no longer got delivered. You figured he’d discard his phone, throw away any direct contact he had with the three of you. You snapped your phone shut a moment later, you’d text Shoko after you got dressed.
Opening your closet was still proving to be a bit difficult, especially as your fingers trailed over the material of the clothing Suguru had kept in your room. They smelt like the laundry detergent he used as well as his cologne, it took your breath away for a moment. You forced yourself away, grabbing some comfortable clothes that were actually yours before shutting the door. You didn’t think you’d ever be able to discard his clothing, despite knowing he wasn’t coming back to you.
You pulled his shirt over your head, grabbing your own and replacing it. You pulled on a pair of shorts after, rubbing your face with your hands as you looked at your appearance in the mirror. No amount of sleep seemed to help the dark circles under your eyes or the sickly look to your complexion. You could only hope Satoru was right, with time it would become more manageable. You glanced at your alarm clock, 7:48pm stared back at you now. The sky outside your window had turned indigo, the sun minutes away from being completely out of sight. The summer was coming to an end, filling your chest with melancholy.
You couldn’t stand being alone in that moment, grabbing your phone and shoving it in your pocket as you made a beeline for your door. You made your way down the hall, remembering as you passed Shoko’s dorm that you needed to text her. Stopping in your tracks, you figured it would just be easier to see her in person. “Shoko?” you called, fingers tapping the door softly because she hated when people knocked too loud. “Coming.” You heard her rustling around her room before the door opened, a half smoked cigarette hanging from her lips.
“Thought Yaga told you no smoking inside.”
“What he doesn’t know won’t kill him, and my window is open.”
You smiled, “I’m hanging out with Satoru on the roof if you wanna join us.” Shoko exhaled, puffing just a bit of smoke in your direction. “I’d love to but I spent the whole afternoon with him ‘cause you were sleeping.” You sighed, rubbing the back of your neck “my bad.” but Shoko was waving you off. “Don’t apologize, you need sleep… I’ll trust Satoru to feed you if you’re hungry.�� She smiled as you rolled your eyes “Alright alright, enjoy the rest of your bad habit and I’ll take Satoru duty.” The look in Shoko’s eyes made your smile falter for just a moment.
They looked oddly wistful, but it vanished just as quickly as your smile faltered. “Aye aye captain.” Shoko started to shut the door as you turned to leave, watching you go for just a moment before shutting it completely. “Satoru.” You drawled, banging on his door so you could be heard over the music he was playing. “Oi, keep it down!” the door swung open a moment later, a cheeky grin on his face as he looked at you. “Ready to go?” He looked cozy in an oversized black hoodie and sweats, sunglasses resting on top of his head.
“Sure am.” you returned his smile, the ache in your chest easing just a bit. It was more bearable when you had someone who understood the pain you felt deeper than surface level. You watched him turn, shutting off his music and the lights before stepping into the hallway. “Are we going to take the normal way or are you going to test out your blue?” Satoru’s eyes seemed to sparkle as you suggested he use his curse technique. “If you insist on blue…” You couldn’t even make a sound as his arm wrapped around your waist, hauling you off of your feet.
In the blink of an eye, you were exposed to the cooling night air. “Damn.” You laughed as he set you down, shuffling over to the small lock box you kept up here with spare blankets and, as Shoko claimed, “necessities”...Which were just two cartons of emergency cigarettes. “Didn’t disorient you, right?” Satoru was standing on the edge, observing the glow of the city in the distance. “Not even a little, you’ve improved a lot, Satoru.” your back was turned to him, so you missed the way his eyes widened slightly, cheeks turning pink.
“Thanks”
You turned back to him, blankets in hand. “So…” You walked over to where he was standing, taking a seat just before the edge and letting your legs dangle off. “...So?” Satoru looked down at you, watching you settle. “Why did you want to come up here… I’d love to gaze at the stars but it’s not like we’ll actually see any with all the light pollution.” Satoru sighed, dropping down to squat beside you. “I guess I just wanted your company… ya know since you’re probably the only other person that understands this.” his tone was awkward, it wasn’t often that you were sentimental… or serious for that matter… with each other.
“Your welcome to have my company any time, Satoru. I don’t know what I’d do if I didn’t have you.” It was so heartfelt it made you feel strange. “Sorry.” You added, a bit meeker than before when he stiffened a bit. “Don’t be sorry, just not used to being so… serious with you.” He sat fully now, shoulder brushing yours as a silent invitation for you to rest your head. You did, just as you always had, watching the lights of the city a few miles away. “It’s strange, isn’t it?” You spoke in a gentle tone, hoping he knew what you meant.
“It is. Knowing he’s there, that he’s okay… while we’re sitting here sulking like idiots.” There was a small bite to his tone as he finished, one that quickly left when he exhaled. “It pisses me off.” It made you upset too, anger bubbling in the back of your mind like a pot of boiling water that was going to overflow at any second. “It pisses me off too, because I truly can’t understand it. I’ve killed myself over the last three weeks trying to understand, to make sense of it. I can’t and I don’t think I ever will. But it’s not my place to reason with it, you know?”
Satoru was silent, waiting for you to continue. “It’s not my life, it’s his. I tried for months to get it out of him, I tried so goddamn hard to get him to open up and he never did. Always redirecting, always avoiding.” You sounded defeated by the end, blinking away the tears that blurred your vision so you could regain composure. “Why didn’t you come to me?” Satoru questioned softly, letting your words sink in like an anchor.
“He gave you so many signs, Satoru. If you couldn’t see them, it wasn’t my place to assist.”
Satoru felt like that should have made him angry, but it didn’t. Mostly because you were right, it had been obvious from the start but he had naively pushed them to the side, pretending it wasn’t true. He was just as much at fault, if anything he was willing to shoulder all of the blame. Because at least you tried. He couldn’t say the same, and he knew that far too well. “Suguru made up his mind the moment he entered that village. There is no stopping a man who is set in their resolve. You said it yourself, Satoru. He looked healthier, happier, content.”
Satoru took in a shaky breath, leaning into you just as you leaned into him. “I just don’t get why he needed to kill his parents.” Your eyes closed, that was the thought weighing heaviest on your mind. “He needed to prove to himself that he was doing the right thing. That nobody, not even his parents, were an exception to his newfound ideology.” It killed you to say it, especially since you had met his parents last winter break. They were kind, at least his mother was. His father was a bit colder but there was still an undeniable love for his son. They had welcomed you so openly, they were proud of the son they had raised.
Now they were gone, nobody but Suguru was to blame.
“In a fucked up way, I don’t care that he killed those people.” The words felt bitter on your tongue, but his letter flashed through your mind and for a moment you understood him. Those two little girls, beaten and caged, scared and facing death for things they never did. Hell, had you gone on the mission with him, you may have encouraged his choices. That realization felt weird as it settled in your gut. “I… I don’t really care either.” Satoru admitted softly, thinking back over the last year, thinking about Amanai. He had been seconds away from doing the same thing.
But Suguru had been his voice of reason, stopping him with a simple command. It should have been obvious then, that Suguru’s life was completely altered from that moment forward. “It was so obvious.” He hissed softly, head falling forward just a bit as anger squeezed his heart. “There is nothing we can do now, Satoru. Nothing we can do will reverse the damage that has been done.” You wished you could believe your own words, part of you wanted to catch a train into the city and barrel into that religious group he took over.
You weren’t even sure what you’d do if you did. Hit him, yell at him? Crumple into his arms like the sucker you were. Maybe a mix of all three, no, it would definitely be a mix of all three. You couldn’t help but wonder how he would react if he saw you again. He made it clear in his letter that he loved you, he still loved you, he would always love you. If you made the choice to leave, would he welcome you in with open arms. Or was he resenting you already for not doing so sooner. Was he waiting for you? Or was it nothing more than sweet-talk.
“You’re not breathing.” Satoru muttered softly, tilting his head just a bit to look down at you. “Oh…” You inhaled deeply, laughing a bit as you exhaled “got lost in thought.” You felt Satoru relax again, head resting against yours. “I get it.” You fell into a comfortable silence, watching as the sky steadily turned from a deep blue to pitch black. There, if you squint hard enough, you could make out a couple of sparkling stars.
You knew if you asked, Satoru could probably whisk you somewhere far away. Somewhere clear so you could actually see the stars with no obstructions.
Yet you were too comfortable, too warm.
Sitting where you were now was more than enough for the time being. That feeling of content actually took the air from your lungs for a moment, blinking steadily as you took in your surroundings. There was a fleeting moment where your heart felt light, that aching heaviness that had been plaguing it for the last three weeks wasn’t present. You wondered quietly if Satoru felt it too. Given the way his body seemed completely relaxed into yours, you assumed he did.
~
You were stumbling down the hall like a drunkard. Your mind felt numb as you moved, head tilted down and expression blank. If anyone were to cross your path at that given moment, they probably would have been unsettled by the sight of you. A zombie moving on autopilot, your brain moving so quickly that it had reduced everything to a quiet, droning buzz.
Murder. 112 people. His parents too. He’s gone. He snapped. He’s a murderer. Suguru is gone.
Nothing made sense, not a single bit of the information you had received made any sense. The fact that Suguru wasn’t answering your frequent texts wasn't making sense. The fact that you had woken up to an empty bed wasn’t making sense. The fact that people were telling you Suguru, your Suguru, had taken over a hundred lives in the span of one night wasn’t making any fucking sense.
Your knees nearly gave out the moment your hand met the wood of your door, pushing it open so quickly it slammed into the wall with a loud thud before coming back at you. Not that you cared, at that moment you could be set on fire and you wouldn’t blink an eye.
You stood in the middle of your dorm room, eyes scanning the room as if it were something foreign. Nothing was making sense, not even your bed looked like your own. It was the pressure cracking down on you already, sinking its claws into your shoulders and forcing you to your knees as the weight of your new reality hit you like a freight train. You couldn’t even bring yourself to cry in that moment, too shell shocked over the report Yaga had read to you and Satoru.
Satoru.
You had stumbled away shortly after the report was finished, barely registering the way he had started to yell. You hadn’t looked back, but it wasn’t like either of them tried to stop you. Despite having just stumbled away from him, you found yourself moving to leave and find him again. At least you would have if your knees didn’t give out on you. You gasped, more out of surprise than pain as your legs made contact with the wooden floor. You sat there for a moment, arms feeling equally as weak as you pushed yourself into a sitting position.
You felt your chest tighten, every breath felt strangled as you tried to inhale. A cold sweat seemed to cover your skin, fingers shaking slightly as you pushed your hair from your face. You couldn’t move, completely paralyzed by shock. It felt like your heart was shattering, every shaky inhale deepening the wound. Still, your tears would not come. Not even as black spots began to obstruct your vision, chest heaving as you began to hyperventilate.
Despite your body vibrating in distress, you felt a nearly silent calm. Like someone had flicked off the switch and stole your ability to hear.
Nothing and everything all at once.
~
“Hey? Y/N wake up…” You jumped a bit, hand coming up to touch the wetness on your cheeks. “You were crying in your sleep.” Satoru muttered softly, hand smoothing over your hair as he cradled you. “I-I was?” You didn’t even realize the change in position or the change in scenery. You were no longer sitting by the roof’s edge, instead you were sitting in Satoru’s lap, his arms holding you tightly as he looked at you with worry.
“You were.” he confirmed, letting you go just as you woke up fully. “Sorry for worrying you, I was just thinking about him… it’s so strange. I’ve been having such intense dreams of the past… I've had dreamless sleep for the last three weeks… so why now?” Satoru sighed, watching you get up to stand and stretch your limbs. “I don’t know. I’ve been having odd dreams about him but I don’t really remember how most of them go by the time I wake up.”
“It’s the universe’s way of torturing us… as if we haven’t been tortured enough. Wait, how long have I been asleep?” The temperature had dropped significantly, the moon was shining high in the sky now. “About an hour or so, I was actually going to bring you back inside but you started to cry and… well here we are now.” Satoru got up, stretching dramatically as you sighed. “You’d think after sleeping for eight hours I wouldn't be tired.”
You walked to the edge of the roof again, feet pressing firmly to the ledge as you looked down. “Being depressed will suck the soul out of you.” For some reason you couldn’t help but laugh. “You seem pretty wide awake, Satoru.” He joined you on the ledge, pushing you a bit to the side. Your training gave you quick reflexes so you didn’t flinch when he did it. “Oh please, you know I’m right.” You glanced at him, laughing softly.
“You are, but so am I. We can be depressed morons together.” His voice was dripping with sarcasm, earning another laugh as you punched his shoulder. “Touche, Gojo”
“Yuck, never call me that again.” His face had morphed into a scowl as you used his last name. He never liked hearing you call him anything other than Satoru. “Fine.” you crossed your arms over your chest, inhaling the cool air. “I think I’m gonna go shower and maybe make something small for dinner… Just so Shoko doesn’t string the two of us up on a lamppost.” Satoru nodded, watching you step off the ledge and move about the roof to put the blankets away.
“I’ll accompany you.” he jumped down, trailing behind you as you moved to open the door that would bring you downstairs. “In the shower? I’m flattered but–” the way his eyes rolled were enough to stop you mid-sentence. “Joking, Satoru.” he sighed out an “I know” closing the distance to haul you up. “Using the stairs is boring.” Within the blink of an eye, you were back inside and standing in front of your dorm room.
“Text me when you’re done showering and we can go get food.”
You nodded, one of the perks of attending school in Tokyo was the fact that the city never slept. You could go find a place to eat at three in the morning and they’d still serve you hot food. Your body sagged against the door of your dorm after shutting it. Flicking on the lights lit the room in a warm, golden glow. For the last three years you considered your room a sanctuary, it was your happy place after a long day of training. Now, it feels oddly cold.
You walked over to your dresser, pulling the top drawer open to grab a fresh pair of underwear and pajamas for after. You tossed them on your bed, reaching down for your bottom drawer to grab a particular towel you liked. It didn’t take you long to put your hair up, not in the mood to wash it just yet, and head to the bathroom. You squinted a bit as the nearly white fluorescent lights filled the room, if you had your way you’d change them to something softer.
It took all of five seconds for your world to come crashing down around you again, eyes zeroing in on the pregnancy test sitting on your counter. I fucking forgot about it…
You set your towel down on the counter, holding your breath as you took the step and reached for the test. You gave yourself no time to prepare, eyes scanning the results once before it hit you like a ton of bricks. You dropped it, letting it clatter on the porcelain counter as a jagged sob ruptured from your chest. Your hand came up to cover your mouth, the other resting on your chest, your heart thumping so wildly you were certain it would burst.
There, on the test, were two lines. It was positive.
You nearly fell forward, dropping down to the trash can beside your sink and rummaging through it without hesitation. Your fingers wrapped around the plastic test from this morning, yanking it up and looking at the results again. There, on the initial test from that morning, were two lines. You didn’t drop it this time, eyes staring at the results as if they’d change. Positive, this whole time it had been positive. You just hadn’t let the first test develop long enough.
“When… How…” You uttered softly, the logical part of your brain screaming at you to be realistic for a second rather than acting so surprised. The irrational side of your brain was still reeling from the revelation. As if Suguru hadn’t been adamant in trying to knock you up for months. “You fucking bastard… you get your way and leave me with the aftermath.” You were struggling, there was no way you’d be able to pinpoint when it happened until you found out how far along you were. For some reason, that was what made reality really set in.
Hot tears streaked your face, sobbing so harshly that it felt like your lungs would collapse on you. You moved in a blur, legs carrying you out of your dorm and down the hall until you were pushing open Satoru’s door. “Woah there, sounds like someone’s hun…” He looked up, the teasing tone in his voice dropping immediately when he saw the tears streaming down your face. “What the fuck happened? Are you hurt?” Satoru crossed the room in two long strides, hands cupping your face as your lips wobbled.
You couldn’t get the words out, crying harder as he ran his hands over you searching for some type of wound. “C’mon, what happened?” His tone had more of a bite to it than he intended but you were causing panic to seep through his veins. You couldn’t breathe, legs nearly buckling under the weight of your reality. Satoru seemed to catch this, hands shooting out to support you as he brought both of you to the floor. “Y/N, please.” he urged you, throat feeling tight.
You shook your head, still sobbing as you raised your hand meekly, the positive pregnancy test out in the open for him to see. Blue eyes widened significantly when he saw it, he didn’t even need to see the two lines to understand why you were so hysterical. “Oh…oh.” he swallowed, hand shakily taking the test from your hand to look at it. “Oh fuck.” it was just barely above a whisper, arm holding you just a little tighter as you cried into his chest.
At least part of you was aware of the possibility, Satoru on the other hand felt completely blindsided. “You two didn’t use protection?” He uttered softly, rocking you slightly without thinking as your cries continued, you couldn’t think at that moment, unable to calm yourself down. You managed to shake your head in response, unable to feel embarrassed as you admitted to not using condoms when with Suguru. “Fuck… did you ever use protection with him?”
He knew the answer, of course he fucking knew the answer. Suguru was utterly obsessed with you, so in love it was nearly nauseating. You shook your head again, confirming that you’d never once used protection with him. “Hey… c’mon…” he started softly when your body shook with the force of your cries but you were no longer making any sounds. He wanted to say it would be alright but he wasn’t sure if it would be.
That answer relied on you.
He couldn’t expect you to be alright, you had your heart broken three weeks prior by the man who often talked about proposing to you as soon as you all graduated. If those were the kind of conversations Suguru was having with him, he couldn’t imagine the conversations Suguru had been having with you. Well, that was a bit of a lie. Considering your reaction to the test results, it seemed this was a long sought after goal. Your cries were from heartbreak, not fear.
~
“I’ve been looking at rings.” Satoru glanced up, noodles dangling half way from his lips. “Hah?” He watched Suguru grimace a bit, some broth splattering as Satoru questioned him. “I’ve been looking at rings for Y/N.” Suguru stated again, a little more cautiously now, watching Satoru slurp the rest of the noodles into his mouth. “Suguru, we haven’t even entered our third year.”
“I know, but…” he shrugged, unable to formulate the right way to say it. “...But? You’re not even eighteen yet, neither is she.” It wasn’t that Satoru didn’t think it was okay, he just figured you were both way too young to even fathom those things. “I don’t intend on proposing to her until we’ve graduated. Listen I know it seems fast but…” Suguru's hands fidgeted with his utensils for a moment, eyes avoiding Satoru until he was ready.
“I love her, Satoru. I didn’t even think it was possible to love someone as much as I love her.”
Satoru blinked, a bit taken back by such a bold declaration over a bowl of cheap ramen. “I’m not doubting that you love her, Suguru. I just think it’s a bit crazy to think about these things so young.” Suguru sighed, watching Satoru with weary eyes as he moved to eat more noodles.
“We’re sourcers, Satoru. A long life isn’t guaranteed.”
~
“Breathe, please. You’re going to pass out.” Satoru’s hand was slapping your back as you coughed, the tears had finally begun to slow but you still weren’t able to form a coherent sentence. “Please…” he tried again, watching you try your best to take a deep breath. It was followed by another, this time it wasn’t superficial. After a couple more, you were able to rub the tears from your eyes and look at him without blurry vision.
“S-satoru I’m so so-sorry.” you hiccuped, your throat feeling raw from your crying. “You have nothing to apologize for, stop feeling like you have to apologize for everything you do.” he let you go a bit, motioning for you to get up with him and sit on his bed rather than the floor. He watched you crawl under his covers, curling up against his pillows, sniffling softly. Despite the weight of the conversation you were about to have, Satoru couldn’t help but chuckle.
He crawled onto his bed as well, sitting beside you but above the covers. “So… I guess the best place to start is… how did this happen. By that I mean, was it intentional?” You sighed, toying with the end of his pillow case as you spoke. “Suguru had been trying to get me pregnant for months now.” You felt warmth flood your cheeks, it felt awkward admitting something like that. “I knew the bastard had a breeding kink.” Satoru said it more to himself than you, but that didn’t stop the shrill yell of his name as you slapped his arm.
“I’m being honest! He just seemed like the type.” Satoru shrugged, holding back laughter as you rolled your eyes and settled back into sulking. “I shouldn’t be so blindsided by this, but it’s fucking ironic that he got what he wanted after he fucking left me… us.” you corrected softly, feeling selfish for being so focused on yourself when Satoru was hurting too. “The universe knows how to play cruel jokes, I’ve thought that my whole life. But, that’s beside the point. We can’t sit here and sulk over it, we need to talk about what to do next.”
You looked up at Satoru, eyes red from crying. It hurt his heart, you looked like a kicked puppy. In that moment he realized how heavily he relied on Suguru, because even now he found himself itching to grab his phone and call him for advice. What was worse, you were now looking to him for help, when really he was just as scared as you. “The next logical step is I need to find a doctor who can run a blood test and confirm the store bought tests are accurate. After that, they need to tell me how far along I am so I can pinpoint when this happened.”
Satoru nodded, you’d both have to fill in Shoko in the morning, she’d be able to help with all the medical bits. “I… I know this seems a bit invasive so please don’t take offense… but are you going to keep it?” Satoru fidgeted a bit, eyes watching as you seemed to zone out and think. Your initial answer was yes, of course, but were you really capable of raising a baby on your own? Then again, you didn’t think you could stomach giving them away for adoption, and you certainly didn’t want to get rid of them. Not after you chased this goal for months, regardless of the way things were right now. “Yeah, as terrifying as it is, I want this baby, Satoru.”
“Okay, so we got two of the biggest things out of the way. Now, the hardest…” you huffed as he trailed off, you weren’t entirely sure you were ready to answer the next question. “What do we do about Suguru, that’s what you’re going to say, right?” It was Satoru’s turn to huff now, nodding as he looked away from you to stare at his hands.
“He… he needs to know.”
“No the fuck he doesn’t.”
You both stared at each other, completely scandalized by the other’s response. “Satoru… He needs to know… he…he’s the fucking dad? How am I supposed to jus–” Satoru shook his head, hands coming up to rub his face before letting them fall back to his lap. “Suguru is a fucking criminal now, he murdered people. Hundreds of people I should fucking remind you and you just want to waltz back into his fucking life and tell him that shit?” You sat up now, eyes burning holes into his skull as you waited for him to at least look at you. “Do you hear yourself?”
You were seething, that same anger you held for Suguru leaving was now bubbling at Satoru for uttering his name like it was pure filth. Satoru stiffened, eyes turning to glare at you. But, every ounce of anger seemed to drain from his body when he saw nothing but hurt glowing in your tired and puffy eyes. “I fucking get it, Satoru. I know what Suguru did but fuck, how am I supposed to just get over him? How am I supposed to carry his child for nine months and push it out of my body just to raise it on my fucking own and never tell him? He’s the one that wanted this in the first place!” Tears glossed your eyes over, hands shaking as they fisted in his sheets.
His mouth opened before closing again, eyes looking away from you because he knew he'd never be able to try and talk sense into you when you looked at him like that. “And what if the child is unable to see curses?” he sounded defeated. “What then, Y/N? What if you give birth to this baby and they lack the ability to see them? That baby would be the very thing Suguru hates.” You froze, it felt like someone had poured ice water down the back of your neck. “If he didn’t spare his own parents, he won’t spare his own child.” Satoru swallowed, looking like he wanted to say so much more but didn’t. He let the words hang there, heavy and dark.
The silence stretched on between the two of you, mostly because you knew he was right. Just because both parents had the ability to see into the curse world and use curse energy, it didn’t guarantee that their offspring would also carry the same blessing. You blinked, hand subconsciously moving to rest over your stomach, as if it would do anything to protect them. “Suguru he… he wouldn’t…” Your words were weak and at that moment Satoru couldn’t bring himself to really fight with you. “But he would, y/n that’s the fucking issue, he would.” his voice was breaking, unsure if he should say what he wanted to say next.
“Then what am I going to do?” You were going to dissolve, tears burning your eyes again as the harsh reality began to sink in. “Let me help you, let me help you raise the baby. I can easily provide for the two of you.” He turned to look at you now, eyes burning with such intensity it stole the air from your lungs. “What?” you hadn’t meant for it to sound offended, you were shocked to say the least, but still the hurt that flashed through his features made you feel the urge to reach out and hug him. “Satoru I didn’t mean for it to come out so harsh…” You moved forward, arms wrapping tightly around his neck and hugging him.
It took a second but his arms came up to wrap around your middle, holding you tightly. “It’s okay, it was a bold statement to make so suddenly.” he soothed you when really you felt that you should be the one soothing him. “No it’s fine, really it just caught me by surprise and…” you hugged him a little tighter, burying your face in his neck. For a moment you nearly stiffened, that was something you usually did to seek comfort from Suguru. In that moment, you couldn’t bring yourself to pull away, finding comfort in Satoru’s reassuring embrace. “You don’t have to answer me tonight.” He hushed you, hand coming up to smooth your hair as he kept you close. “I doubt you have an appetite now, how about we just sleep?”
“I still need to shower.” You pulled away, laughing softly when you remembered what you had been in the process of doing before your world flipped. “Okay, then go and shower but please come back to me when you’re done.” His tone was quiet, something in it held no room for you to disagree. So, you let go of him reluctantly, nodding as you crawled over him to stand. “Again, you don’t have to answer me tonight, or tomorrow, or even next week. But please, think about what I said.” He stayed on his bed, watching you shakily grab the pregnancy test before heading for his door. “I will, Satoru. Keep my spot warm.” you smiled at him over your shoulder, heart still heavy as you disappeared through the open door.
The hot water on your skin wasn’t enough to wash away the dread growing in your chest. You found your hands absentmindedly running along your abdomen, still finding it hard to believe something was there, something that would grow into a living breathing human in a few months time. A mix of you and Suguru, how strange. This wasn’t how you imagined it would happen, nor were these the feelings you expected to experience when the time came. If anything, it made you more upset. You should be happy, you should be fucking estatic. You should be basking in the euphoric state of knowing you’d be having a child with the man you adored.
Instead, you had sobbed in the arms of his best friend, completely hysterical. And the man you loved had no idea you were even pregnant, that the very thing he wanted had been achieved and he wouldn’t even get to know. At least not yet. You had taken Satoru’s words into consideration, of course you did. But in the back of your mind, you knew there was no way you’d be able to go on with your life without ever telling Suguru. He would know, he would know of his child, you were already set on that. You twisted the knob, the water turning off a second later as you got out and dried yourself off a bit before wrapping the towel around you.
Your body was aching from the events of the last few hours. Returning to Satoru’s room and sleeping in his warm bed sounded like heaven to you. Sleeping next to someone again felt like heaven to you. You had to wonder what Suguru would think if he knew you were sharing his best friend’s bed – albeit nothing sexual was occuring between the two of you. And even then, Suguru had broken up with you in that letter, you were technically no longer his. The thought made you feel sick as you reached for the clothing you had laid on your bed. You pulled the shorts on first, reaching for the oversized shirt second, trying to ignore the nausea building in your gut.
You moved around your room without thinking, flicking the lights off before heading out the door and back down the hall. Satoru had changed into his own pajamas, hair damp from the shower he must have taken while you went to take yours. He only had his bedside lamp on, the pace beside him vacant and waiting for you. “Are you sure you don’t want food?” he questioned softly as you shut the door behind you. “I’ll eat a good breakfast if my morning sickness allows.” Those words felt foreign, referring to your nausea as morning sickness felt so bizarre. “Alright but if you wake up in the middle of the night starving don’t hesitate to wake me up.”
You laughed softly, huffing out an “okay” as you crawled over him and under the covers once more. Satoru pulled the blankets up over both of you before reaching over and flicking off the light. “Goodnight.” he spoke softly, settling into his bed as you rolled onto your side to get comfortable. “Night, Satoru.” You whispered back, eyes already feeling heavy, the comfort his bed offered was no match for the gnawing reality you were facing. For now, you were thankful for it.
~
“Think fast!” You laughed, hurtling one of the poles directly in Satoru’s direction. He turned, using infinity to block it just before it hit his face. “Nice! Your reflexes are getting faster.” You picked up another weapon, Suguru was watching you intently, an easy smile on his face. “Sugu!” You called, aiming to throw another pole. “Think fast.” you repeated, arm going back before using every ounce of strength to beeline it straight at him. Suguru smiled, summoning a curse easily to deflect it. “Not bad.” you winked, watching him roll his eyes as the curse disappeared.
“Y’all are gross.” Satoru drawled, pushing his glasses up his nose. “We didn’t even say anything?” Suguru countered, stepping out of the shade and into the sun. “You don’t need to say anything, the tension is almost unbearable.” Shoko chimed, twirling her lighter around her fingers as she watched the three of you. This time you couldn’t help but laugh, letting Suguru close the distance and wrap an arm around your waist. “See, gross!” Satoru sighed dramatically as you kissed Suguru’s cheek. “It’s called being in love, something you wouldn’t get, Satoru.” You stuck your tongue out at him, laughing as he rolled his eyes.
“Well if you’re gonna be all gross and lovey with one another, go do it in private.”
“Okay.”
You and Suguru spoke in unison, a shrill laugh leaving you as he bent down and hauled you up and over his shoulder. Naturally Shoko faked a gagging noise, watching as he carried you away with a smile. “They’re so gross.” Satoru commented again, eyes following the two of you until you were completely out of sight. Though, he couldn't deny the small smile tugging at his lips.
“Suguru.” you slapped his back lightly, he was still carrying you over his shoulder even after entering the dorm buildings. “Hmm?” he paid you no mind as he climbed the stairs, his end destination would be your dorm room… more specifically your bed. “You can put me down now.” You knew he wouldn’t, so you opted for running your hands along his back, feeling his steps falter for a moment before composing himself. “I’ll put you down when I’m good and ready.”
You rolled your eyes, playfully swatting at his ass. “Alright, that's it. You’re getting punished.” His words were very matter-of-fact, so much so that you couldn’t help but burst out laughing. “Okay dad.” Suguru didn’t miss a beat, stalking down the hallway towards your dorm room. “Yeah, I’m trying to become one so it would help me out if you cooperated.” You made a strangled noise, it had been three weeks since Suguru admitted to wanting to get you pregnant. Needless to say, he wasn’t giving up any time soon.
“You just want a reason to fuck me.” You tried to counter, jumping a bit as he pushed into your dorm room and kicked the door closed behind him. “I don’t need a reason to fuck you, baby.” You couldn't describe the noise you made, whiplash taking over as he tossed you onto your bed. “I guess that’s true…” You pushed up on your elbows, watching him pull his white shirt up and over his head, knocking his hair out of his bun in the process. “You’ll be good for me right?” He was dropping to his knees before you, a gentle plea of his name leaving your lips.
“Atta girl.” he murmured, warm fingers hooking in the waistband of your shorts and pulling them down. You watched him with parted lips, watching the way his eyes observed you. “Already wet? How fucking filthy.” his hands splayed along your thighs, pushing them wide open so he could really look at you. “Just because I picked you up? Or maybe it was from wrapping my arms around your waist?” He teased, pulling one hand from your thigh to spread your cunt open instead. “Tell me, pretty girl… what has you so worked up already?”
“All of it.” You’re breathless as you look at him, no shame in your eyes as you admit how badly you want him. Suguru smiled, fingers keeping you spread as he watched the arousal pool at your entrance. “All of it, hmm? I make you that horny?” His tone was light but the look in his eyes was anything but. You could feel him devouring you whole. “Yeah, you fucking do.” You tried to keep your hips still, praying he’d do something other than watch you grow wetter by the second. “Tell me something, would you?” he pulled his eyes away to meet yours.
“Anything.” You comment softly, waiting to hear what he had to say. Suguru smiled, fighting the urge to reach up and tuck some of your hair behind your ear. “Tell me what you want me to do to you.” His voice was barely a whisper, pupils blown wide as he looked at you. You audibly groan, face feeling warm as your head falls back. “Eat me out, Suguru.” You drawl, no longer embarrassed by the things he makes you say. “As you wish.” He couldn’t even tease you for such an honest answer. Suguru’s head dipped lower, tongue licking up your inner thighs, teeth grazing the skin eagerly.
“Sugu…” You whined out, his lips growing closer to your aching cunt. “... can I suck you off after?”
Suguru’s whole body jolted as you uttered those words, mouth moving to lick and suck along your folds as his honest answer. You took that as a yes. You couldn’t help but squirm as his hands began kneading the flesh of your thighs, all the while his tongue was lapping at your cunt. Each movement sent electricity up your spine, one hand shakily reaching out to hold his head as his lips wrapped around your pulsating clit. “Oh fuck… Suguru…” you were embarrassed by how quickly he had learned to make you cum, the pressure already building in your gut.
He didn’t slow, rather he slipped two fingers into your slick entrance and scissored them in time with his sucking. He loved to put on a show for you, going as far as to slurp your juices just so he could hear you cry out. You couldn’t think straight when his tongue was wiggling against your clit, stopping every few seconds to suck until your back arched. Suguru continued this until he felt your fingers tighten in his hair, pulling harsh as your moans turned into breathy gasps. He pulled away with a slick pop, smiling deviously as your head shot up to glare at him. “Suguru!” You wailed, letting go of his hair angrily.
“Not yet, I don’t want you coming yet.”
“No fucking fair!” you whined, head falling back against the mattress in defeat. “So selfish.” Suguru laughed as he pushed himself off the floor, now making a show of pulling the rest of his clothing off. “There goes your chances at getting head.” you chided, watching as that shit eating grin remained on his lips. “You think this is funny!” you whined again, the echoes of your denied orgasm making you close your thighs to try and alleviate the pressure. Suguru watched you, cock throbbing as he kicked his pants off the rest of the way and tossed them to the side.
“I do think it’s funny, mostly because you look so cute when you’re so worked up.” his hands wrapped around himself, pumping languidly as you spread your thighs again, eager for more. Suguru smirked, always defiant until his cock was out. “Nah baby, I don’t think you deserve this right now.” he continued to stroke himself, head falling back just a bit as his own aching arousal was finally being relieved. “Sugu…” you choked out in a hushed whisper, mouth watering as he let out a breathy sigh, fingers toying with the sensitive tip. You were regretting your earlier statement.
“Sugu…” you spoke softly, watching him lift one leg to plant his foot on the mattress, hand still gliding along his shaft as his jaw slackened. He ignored you, continuing to get himself off. He was waiting for you to do something, that realization had you pushing yourself up, pulling your shirt up and over your head and tossing it to the ground. You pulled your legs off the side of the bed, maneuvering yourself until you sat on your knees before him. “Let me suck you off.” breathless, hands folded neatly on your lap as you waited for his response.
Suguru smiled at you, watching the mattress move as your hips squirmed. “I thought you said the chances of me getting head were gone.” he teased, hand massaging just before the head of his cock, making his own voice falter as he spoke to you. “I never said that.” which was kind of true, you didn’t say those exact words. Suguru cocked an eyebrow, unable to maintain his stern demeanor as your tongue moved to wet your lips, eyes completely focused on his fist. “Please, your hand is so boring Suguru, especially when you could have my mouth.” you tried again, eyes sliding up his torso, admiring the dips and plains of his muscles.
“When you put it like that, it’s hard to say no.” he murmured softly, letting his cock go. You scooted closer, until your knees were nearly off the edge of the mattress. “Thank you.” You whispered softly, watching his face flush a shade of pink, eyes quickly looking away from you to try and regain some sort of composure. The first touch was always enough to make him weak in the knees, your tongue gliding gently over his weeping tip before lowering to the underside of his shaft. He met your eyes, face still flushed as you looked at him with such adoration. All the while your mouth was doing sinful things to him, your duality was enough to induce whiplash.
His fingers came up to rake through your hair, guiding you as your jaw slackened, head moving to engulf him in the wet heat your mouth had to offer. “Oh fuck…” Suguru choked when you didn’t stop moving, throat constricting as your nose brushed the unruly mess of black hair at his base. You held yourself there, drool dripping down your chin as your cheeks hollowed. Slowly you dragged yourself back, watching the shiny coat of saliva covering his shaft in your wake. You repeated those motions, finding a comfortable place to bob your head at, his length heavy on your tongue. “So good for me… fuck you’re so good for me… I don’t know what I did to deserve you…”
You merely hummed, ignoring the slow but steady ache building in your jaw as your hand moved along his shaft. You could tell he was starting to really feel it, his cock twitching every few motions, head tilted back as his eyes fluttered shut. You had to admit you were impressed he managed to stay on his feet. Most times, when Suguru dared to eat you out while you were standing, you were nearly a dead weight in his grasp by the end. The only thing keeping you up was the wall he stuffed you against and his shoulders because he tossed your legs over them. You stopped when you felt him twitching violently, jaw clenched tight as his head shot forward to look down at you.
“Gonna make me cum, pretty girl.” He choked out, hands cupping your cheeks to guide you as you moved your head again. Your hands shot out, holding his thighs tightly as you let him use your head how he pleased, guiding you to a pace that made your eyes water before he stilled all together. You forced yourself to relax as Suguru spilled down your throat, letting you greedily swallow all of it before pulling off of him with a lewd pop. “Fuck…” he nearly fell into the bed, dick still hard as he crawled onto the matress with you. “How about we do this…” he sounded breathless, laying on his side and guiding you to do the same. You knew what he wanted, swollen lips parting as you sighed, settling with your back just barely touching his front.
You let Suguru grab one leg, lifting it up slowly to create enough space for himself. “Lazy boy…” You teased over your shoulder, letting his arm hook under your neck, large hand resting on your chest. “Maybe I am, but you fucking love it.” You couldn’t complain, not when he was angling his hips and pressing the weeping tip of his cock at your entrance. He pressed into you, adjusting both of your bodies until he found a comfortable position to properly rut his hips into you. All you could do is let him, whining loudly as he split you open, stuffing you full. “How’s that, hmm? Does it feel good?” Suguru whispered against your ear, panting as your walls constricted around him and tried to push him out at the very same time. “F-feels so good…so good…” You whined loudly.
Suguru didn’t give you a verbal response after that, instead focusing all of his attention on finding a good rhythm to fuck you too. You couldn’t stop the noises that spilled past your lips, each drag of his cock in and out of your heat was enough to make your vision blurry. It took everything in you to at least keep your head up, tilted downwards to watch where he disappeared and reappeared between your legs. “Suguru…” a breathless plea, one that turned into a steady mantra as all you could think about was him and what he was doing to you. Had you not been so overwhelmed you would have heard his quiet grunts of praise each time your bodies connected.
Suguru watched a shaky hand slide down your front, in your whimpering daze you managed to slip two fingers down there to rub sloppy circles on your clit. “Gonna cum, aren’t ya?” Suguru gasped, his cock twitching violently as your cunt suctioned to him, nearly making his thrusts falter. “Y-yeah…” you managed to get out, no longer having the strength to keep your head up. You let it fall, resting snuggly in the crook of the arm he was using to support you. “Then come for me, pretty girl. I wanna feel you come all over my cock… then maybe I’ll fill you up, yeah? You’d love that…” you responded with a loud whine, walls fluttering around his length each time he pushed it back in.
“There we go, come for me.” He encouraged again, warm breath ghosting the shell of your ear and earning a shiver in response. You could feel it, the aching build of a damn that was on the verge of breaking, every breath you made was nothing but a labored pant. Your heart was beating erratically, just as you were about to fall over the edge, Suguru gasped. You couldn’t help but gasp with him, his release pumping into you, hot and sticky. “F-fuck sorry…” he grounded out, his own orgasm sneaking up on him and completely catching you by surprise. Not that it mattered to you, that strained and embarrassed apology was all you needed before you felt yourself coming as well.
You both essentially collapsed, Suguru holding you tightly as he angled himself to remain inside of you, to keep his cum inside of you. “You okay?” he mumbled softly, hand lazily reaching for the one you had used to rub your clit and bring it to your lips. You whined as he popped the shiny fingers in his mouth, cleaning them with his tongue. “Yeah, I'm good…great really.” You chuckled, eyelids feeling heavy as he hummed. “Good.” he mumbled softly, pulling your fingers from his mouth to kiss them gingerly. “You know I love you, right?” Suguru’s voice was tender, so tender it nearly pulled the air out of your lungs. “Yeah, of course I know that Sugu… you know I love you too, right?”
“I know.” was all he said in reply, you had to wonder why he was suddenly so sentimental. Suguru was typically softer with you after sex, aftercare was one of his specialties. But something about his tone felt different, something about his question felt like there was more meaning behind it. You had been noticing the bags under his eyes for the last few weeks, but every time you asked he always brushed you off. “Is everything okay?” you tried to turn your head to look back at him, but the angle he had you in proved to make movement difficult. “Mmhmm, just want to make sure you’re okay.” but he hadn’t been that rough with you. “Yeah, I’m okay… but you haven’t answered me.” He stopped kissing your hand, setting it down gently as he moved to kiss your shoulder.
“I haven’t?”
“I asked you if you were okay.”
“Well, I did answer you. I said yes.” he didn’t sound offended, more or less he sounded amused. “Mmhmm isn’t a yes, Suguru.” You, on the other hand, sounded a little less enthused. “I’m okay, baby. Is that better.” you couldn’t see it but you could hear the smile on his lips. “Yeah, that’s better.” But for some reason, you couldn’t shake the worry clinging to your heart.
~
“Hey… hey…” you woke with a gasp, eyes wet as you tried to remember where you were. “You okay? You started crying in your sleep again.” A worried but groggy voice was speaking to you, one that was familiar but your brain couldn’t seem to catch up. “Y/N? It’s me, it’s Satoru.” There it was, you nearly fell back into the pillow with relief as he spoke. “Shit I’m sorry… I was dreaming and it just… fuck it felt so real. I couldn’t remember where I was…” you wiped your eyes, slowly adjusting to the dark room again. “It’s okay… you’ve been dreaming a lot.” Satoru sighed, he remembered you saying that your nights had been pretty dreamless for the last three weeks so why was that changing now?
“I know… it just started happening too. Maybe it's because of the baby.”
Your hand lowered to your stomach, palm resting flatley against it. You still couldn’t process the fact that there was something in there, something that was growing, a mix of you and him. “Can pregnancy make you dream more?” Satoru chuckled, blue eyes shifting to read his alarm clock. It was just past four in the morning. You had slept pretty well until a few minutes ago. He had been watching you, woken up by your body growing restless. He woke you up the moment he heard you start to sniffle. “I dunno, maybe.” you sighed, eyes feeling heavy again. “Sorry for waking you, Toru.” You didn’t hear the way his breath hitched, your yawn effectively shutting it all out.
You hadn’t called him by that nickname in weeks, he hadn’t really realized how much he missed it. “Don’t apologize, I told you to stop that.” Not stern, just tired, he wanted you to go back to normal but he knew that was impossible. Things would never go back to how they were. “Oh, yeah… I guess you have told me that.” You chuckle, turning on your side to face him in the dark. “I won’t apologize for forgetting this time, okay?” You grinned, eyes closing and unaware that he was able to see it in the dark. “Okay.” He sighed, a grin creeping up his own face as he let his eyes shut again. Hopefully you’d sleep through to his alarm at 8:30am, you had a busy day ahead.
~END OF PART ONE~
Thank you for reading! I hope you look forward to part 2 <3333
Likes, comments and reblogs are always appreciated ;3
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yes, i'm ready (to fall in love)

── ˚₊✩‧₊ genre: smut, fluff, mild angst
── ˚₊✩‧₊ synopsis: after reader is persuaded into putting herself back out there by long time friend, shoko, she successfully ends up scoring a date. unbeknownst to her, though, the gods have different plans—and one of them seems especially interested in her relationship with ex-husband, gojo satoru.
or in other words: a failed date results in a night of passion amongst former lovers.
── ˚₊✩‧₊ contents: 13.5k words, ex-husband!gojo + co-parent!gojo, slight dub-con (alcohol use), dumbification, overstimulation, vaginal penetration, unconventional form of contraception (pull-out method - don’t do this), pussy eating + one oc for the sake of plot
── ˚₊✩‧₊ note: i know this is really long and most people don’t have the attention span for it but PLEASE give it a chance! this is literally the longest piece of fiction i’ve ever written and i’m really proud of it :(
songs to listen to for best reading experience: donny hathaway - i love you more than you’ll ever know barbara mason - i’m ready partynextdoor - showing you bryson tiller - been that way

After you divorced your ex-husband, and decided to devote all of your time to being a mother, you never really considered getting back into the dating world. Not that you didn’t eventually want to settle down with someone new, but the dating world now was just so–different.
Different in the sense that meeting people organically was becoming increasingly difficult. It wasn’t like how it used to be in high school or college, and it really didn’t take that much effort then to get a man’s number by the end of your outing.
When you were in your early twenties, a brush of your hand on a man’s arm would’ve worked. An ‘accidental’ bump into someone at a grocery store or cafe might’ve ended in a quick lay. Using these tactics today, though, might earn you some weird looks–have–earned you some weird looks.
You’re on call with a friend from college when you begin recounting something embarrassing that happened to you recently. At first, the conversation started out about all of the professors you would’ve slept with (if given the chance), but then, one thing led to another, and she asked you something that made you wince:
“‘How’s your dating life been since, you know, Satoru?’”
There’s a heavy silence from your end, and she almost thinks you hung up.
“I mean, if you want to share,” she splurts, attempting to approach this gently, “I know that after the divorce, I wasn’t there for you like you needed, but I’d like to make up for that–if you’d let me.”
Shoko’s always been like that. Blunt and charismatic, but gentle and zephyr-light in the way she cares for those closest to her. It’s a trait of hers that you admire, because not so many people would care to treat your heart with such fragility.
“No, it’s okay. You can ask, you know, it’s not this secret thing,” you start, sighing before continuing, “it happened, and it was a mutual decision.”
Shoko hums on the other side, “Well, I’m still sorry. I let us go without talking for far too long…”
“Well, I accept your apology, even if it’s unwarranted. Like I said, it was mutual and…there wasn’t really an intense grieving period for me? The only thing that hurt me is that you distanced yourself. I mean, the girls did miss their aunt Shoko…” you say, trying to make her feel bad but not too bad.
“I know, I know, I’m a bad aunt,” she jests, then the tone shifts to something serious. “I think I was just scared because both of you were my best-friends. I didn’t want to ‘pick sides’, but I see now that it was a mutual decision, so I’m assuming you two are on good-terms?”
Again, you pause, “I mean, yeah. Satoru will always be my best friend. We may not be together romantically but he’s such an integral part of my life, I couldn’t do this–all of this–alone.” After you say it, you feel a weight being lifted off of your chest that you didn’t know was even there.
You think nobody would understand if you told them this. You think they’d question how a person could divorce someone who’s supposed to be their best-friend. And with the way you describe it, they’d probably think you were still in love with him. But Shoko’s different, she gets it. Which is why saying it to her came so easily.
“He is a great father,” she chimes in, “but you two rushed into it so quickly, I don’t think either of you had time to discover yourselves after college.”
Although she can’t see it, you smile. Because she gets it. Even if time did place itself in between the two of you, she was there for most of it, when things were still touch-and-go. When things were fresh, and clumsy.
“Exactly, that was our biggest gripe,” you admit, “We didn’t afford ourselves that time to grow, and I think that hindered our relationship. We weren’t husband and wife first, we were parents–and we were young, way too young.”
“You made it, though,” Shoko tries to brighten the mood, “you’re both amazing parents, and I know those beautiful girls that you created are lucky to have you.”
The intimacy of the conversation sends your emotions into overdrive. You quickly realize how much you missed her, how much you yearned to talk to her. To reconnect on this level.
A single tear cascades down your cheek, and you try not to sound like you’re crying when you say, “Ok, enough about that. You wanted to know about my shitty dating life, right?”

It happened last week, the grocery store incident. You were out picking up a few things for dinner when you spotted a cute guy standing outside of the aisle a few rows from you. He was fit beyond measure, in looks and strength, and was wandering around aimlessly in pursuit of red pepper flakes.
Coincidentally, you just happened to be in the seasoning aisle, and like the good samaritan you were, decided to personally hand-deliver it to him.
You wince as you vividly recall the embarrassing ordeal that ensued immediately after.
“Hey,” you peer from behind the aisle, with a bottle of red pepper flakes in tow. “I heard you mumbling about finding this, and you looked pretty lost, so I thought I’d pick ‘em out for you.”
The man’s brows furrow briefly before his lips up-turn into a grateful smile, “Oh, cool, thank you so much!” As quickly as the conversation started, it ends even quicker. He gives you a final nod of endearment before he’s turning around on his heels to resume his shopping.
“God, could he be any more dense? The men today really make you work for it, huh?” you mumble to yourself, pulling the bosom of your blouse down until a good amount of cleavage is on display. “Okay, alright. You got this, you got this. This always used to work, right? Yeah, men love boobs.”
Walking up to the man again, you try a different approach–a bolder approach. “Not to be a bother but I was wondering if I could-”
“Babe? Oh, there you are,” a new voice interjects. The owner of the voice emerges from around the corner and walks up to the man with a cart and a baby in tow. You’re stunned, to say the least. All you can do is stand there and blink in complete and utter dumbfoundment. As you remain in their presence, you take a moment to analyze the woman. She’s gorgeous, and toned. A real model-type broad, with feline-ish features that make so much sense paired with the man who appears to be her partner.
Oh, you think, and apparently say aloud, too. That’s when the woman turns to you, finally acknowledging your much smaller, and much quieter presence.
“Hi, can we help you?” she smiles, and it’s actually genuine. Toothy and perfect, and totally not jealous. You blink once, twice, before gathering your wits to answer her question.
“Yeah, uh, no. I actually, uhm, was helping your h-husband. He was looking for red pepper flakes,” you mutter embarrassedly, and point to the bottle in his hand. Upon further observation, you notice that she isn’t exactly wearing a ring. You find this odd, especially because his not wearing a ring is what encouraged you to pursue him. Carefully, you prod.
“If I may ask, how come neither of you are wearing rings?” The couple gives each other a look, one that makes you feel like the odd man out. A look that is universally known, and without a doubt, could easily be translated to: ‘did this chick really just ask that?’
Still, you smile as you wait for an answer. The woman takes the initiative. “Yeah, we don’t really believe in rings, isn’t that right, babe?” she says so matter-of-factly. You blink again for what seems like the thousandth time, because of all things, you did not expect that to come out of her mouth. Her husband is quick to validate her statement.
“Yeah, we think rings are unnecessary, you know? You don’t need a piece of metal to confirm your feelings,” he says walking to his partner’s side and wrapping an arm around her.
Disgustingly, the two give each other googly eyes before locking lips briefly. You can tell they’re the type to probably share this information with just about any soul who asks. Today, you just happened to be that unfortunate soul.
“Are you married?” she queries, tilting her head against her husband’s chest.
“I was, now we just…co-parent,” you purse your lips, ready for this entire interaction to be over. The woman frowns at your answer, and this time it’s not as genuine.
“Awe, well, I’m sorry to hear that.”
“It was actually a mutual decision,” you quip.
“Okay,” she smiles, widening her eyes at her husband to signal a departure, “well, it was nice meeting you, and thank you for the red pepper flakes.”
The family turns away and heads to the front where check-out is. You don’t even buy the items you intended to purchase, just leave your cart in the middle of whatever aisle you abandoned it and leave the store.

“Oh, baby, you didn’t?” Shoko asks in horror. You nod your head, still forgetting she can’t see you and the way you’re sliding down against the wall.
“I did, and I shan't ever again,” a laugh erupts from your throat.
“I mean, fuck, are we getting old? ‘Don’t believe in rings,’” she mumbles, “Don’t believe in rings, my ass! Is this what the youth are doing these days? Not proposing with rings?”
Now that you think about it, you wonder how that would even work. “Yeah, right? I mean, how does that even work? ‘Will you marry me? But, actually, you should know I don’t have a ring for you, so people will have to guess that we’re together purely based on vibes and energy,’” you mock, in a not-so-great man voice.
Shoko’s laughing so hard by the end of your bit that she breaks the sound barrier, and the sound that makes on the phone sends you into your own fit of laughter. You laugh so hard it seems like a stream of pee comes out. Curse your developed incontinence after motherhood.
“God, you’re so stupid, I can’t breathe,” she says exasperatedly, and you know that on the other side she’s probably keeling over in her bed.
“Oh, please. I bet you haven’t laughed this hard in a long time, bitch.”
“I haven’t,” she cackles. This back-and-forth continues until the two of you settle down enough to continue discussing your (pee-inducing) love life.
“You tried any dating apps?”
It’s a simple and valid question, but it only makes you laugh even harder. You only stop when the other side of the line goes quiet. “Wait, seriously?”
“Yeah, seriously. It’s what everyone’s doing these days! You’re not that old, you know.”
“Shut up,” you kid, “ it’s just that I never considered it. I mean, dating apps feel so impersonal. How serious do people even take it?”
“Sure, there’s people who use it for casual hook-ups and stuff, but a lot of people do come out of it with a relationship. Just don’t knock it ‘till you try it.”
“Oh?” you muse, curious. You wish Shoko could see your face, and the weird little dance your brows were doing. “Shoko, have you used a dating app before?”
The brunette kisses her teeth. “Can’t get anything past you.”
“Never.”
There’s a sense of hesitance but you encourage her to elaborate because ‘she became estranged from you for almost a decade and needed to pay her dues’. Sighing defeatedly, she eventually acquiesces.
“Fine, fine, maybe I’ve…been on a few dates,” she starts, “–and had a few one night stands, maybe more than a few, and maybe even dated a guy that turned into my stalker–”
“Ieiri Shoko! You naughty, naughty girl! Wait, stalker?”
“To make a long story short, I got a restraining order on that creep. Anyway,” she segues, attempting to change the subject, “We should make you a profile!”
For the rest of your phone call, Shoko guides you through all of the dating app basics. She offers her expert advice as you scroll through your camera roll for potential photos to use. You go through about a hundred before you finally settle on five that she really likes.
The one that she tells you to put first is a photo of you in a bikini. It’s a few years old but she says you look ‘radiant’ and that your ‘tits were practically spilling out of the cups’. Plus, for further consolation, she says most people on dating apps are liars.
“Everyone’s got at least one old photo on their profile, doesn’t make you a catfish,” she quips, “just means you’re a nostalgic person!”
“Right…”
The next one is a selfie. You’re smiling big in it, showing your gums, and it’s genuine. Shoko says guys like those types of photos because it shows them that you’re approachable. It also won her over because it’s fairly recent, too.
Out of all your photos, there’s only a select few that were taken within the year. You had to admit to her that you never really took photos of yourself anymore. Satoru took most of your candids. Still, she had a mission. And she wasn’t going to be satisfied until she stuck around to see your first match.
“After the selfie you should put the one of you with the girls.”
The picture she’s referring to is one Satoru also took. You remember that day fondly, and even now, the memories feel like a warm embrace.
about 8 years ago . . .
“Dad, mom, look! Hurry!” Hana, your oldest, shouts. Satoru and you are sitting on a blanket up on the sand dunes with Haruki, who’s trying her best to make a sand castle–to no avail.
“What is it, hon?” Satoru and you rush over to her, snatching toddler Haruki in the same breath. When you get to the scene, a flood of warmth washes over you upon discovering the ‘threat’.
“See, it’s baby turtles!” Hana’s squatting in the sand, watching with pure and unfettered fascination as the hatchlings crawl north to the ocean. When she looks up at you, with eyes so bright, and a smile so big that’s missing two of her front teeth, you want to cry.
“Oh, hon, that’s beautiful,” you gasp, lowering to your haunches so that you can join her. Satoru is about to follow suit before deciding at the last minute to go back to the blanket. When he returns, he snaps a picture unbeknownst to you. Eventually, though, you turn your gaze to him and he captures–what he used to think then–the ‘prettiest’ photo of you.
“You sneaking photos of me?” you squint, pointing at him. He trods closer until he’s standing above you. Then he snaps another. Your head’s tilted up, and you’ve got one eye open, and the other closed because of the sun. He always liked when you squinted like that because it made your nose do this cute little scrunch.
“Yup, ‘cause you’re my muse.”
You’re pulled out of your daydream when Shoko says your name on the other line.
“You still there?”
“Yeah, it’s just…”
“Just what?” she queries, waiting for a response.
“I wanna use it, but my ex-husband took it. It feels weird, you know? And do I want to use a photo of me with the girls?”
“Hon, who cares if Satoru took the photo? It’s still a good photo, and to answer your second question, why wouldn’t you include a picture with your girls?”
“I don’t know, I guess I’m just afraid no one will be interested. Nothing about a picture of a mom with her two daughters exactly screams ‘fuck me’.”
Shoko lets out a small chuckle but you’re being serious. “Oh, sweetie. You’re so cute. Milfs are in these days, I don’t think I’m the one getting old, I think it’s just you!”
“Ha-ha, laugh at the mom,” you feign annoyance, but give her a laugh in return.
“But seriously, please use that photo. Nobody’s going to skip you just because you’re a mom. A lot of men on there have kids of their own, just gotta tweak your settings,” Shoko reassures you.
By the end of your call, the profile is set. You thank your old friend for the previous heart-to-heart conversation, and the time she spent helping you set up your profile.
“Keep me updated, and don’t talk about mom stuff, okay? Now, I’m not saying you can’t talk about them,” she begins, “but show these guys your personality! I know she’s in the closet somewhere hiding next to our old slutty clubbing clothes.”
Then, the both of you say your goodbyes and she wishes you a good-luck on your newly established dating journey. As you lay in your bed, you give your profile a final onceover. Not too bad, you think to yourself.
You ended up using all of the photos she had originally picked out for you. Even the beach photo. To compensate for your old photos, though, Shoko made sure that your prompts were witty and full of personality.
“I’d match me, I think. No, yeah, these are funny. She did a good job.”

The following day, you open your phone to fifty notifications from the dating app. A tingle of excitement shoots through your body from the tip of your toes, to the top of your head. It takes all of your might not to squeal in the office.
“Holy fuck,” you whisper at your desk. The amount of notifications that you initially saw on your homescreen read ‘50’ but when you opened the app, it showed you an overwhelming ‘100’ with a fat plus sign next to it. “Wait, are these all the people who liked me? Shoko’s gonna flip.”
Getting up from your chair, you make a beeline to the nearest bathroom. Not that you have to use it, but so you can scroll through all the potential prospects without your boss seeing you on your phone.
Pulling open the door to the bathroom, you close it shut behind you and lock it. A few minutes pass in the time you’re able to get through about half of the people who liked you. You end up skipping a lot of them. They’re either too young, too self-absorbed, creepy, or just downright not your type.
Some stick out, though. Even trick you into thinking they’re potential matches, but then the other shoe drops–because there’s always another shoe. You’ll scroll through their profiles, and they’ll seemingly have all the perfect traits: intelligent, witty, handsome, tall–and then, boom. You see their ‘don’t want kids’ preference. Every failed match only discourages you more and more.
It’s weird, because your profile preferences are set to ‘have kids’ and you even have a photo pictured with your girls. So why are men liking your profile despite that? After a few more scrolls, you’re just about ready to head back to your desk but then–you have a hit.
Your finger hovers over the ‘x’ at the bottom of the screen, then retracts. The guy’s profile at first impression is miles better than the rest, it’s almost too good to be true. His first photo is what piqued your interest. It’s of him posing for a silly photo with his sons, and he’s got his arms draped around their shoulders.
As you scroll down his profile, you see that there’s even more of him with his children. You take this as a green flag. He wants people to know he has kids, and that he isn’t embarrassed to show them off. You admire him for it.
The last few remaining photos are an amalgamation of selfies and full-body photos. To the average, well-adjusted adult, looks wouldn’t be a deal breaker. But he definitely wasn’t too bad on the eyes, and you were not complaining about that–especially, after the odd men you had to scroll through to get here. In other words, he was gorgeous and still fit despite being older than you (him, respectively being in his early forties).
Checking the time on your phone, you realize that you’re pushing your little ‘bathroom break’. Before heading back to your desk, you decide to respond to his first photo.
You: Cute! Could never get my girls to stand so still for a photo like this now haha :)

Work goes by slower than you’d like, but finishes up just in time when you get a notification from the dating app. You’re a little more excited than you’d care to admit. Tidying up your workspace, you say your goodbyes to your colleagues and head to the elevator. Absent-mindedly, you rush to answer his message but realize it won’t go through because of the elevator’s poor service.
Kazuki: Oh, they’re moody and grown now, don’t be fooled. I can't remember the last time I saw my youngest smile.
You don’t answer his reply until you get home. Actually, you do just about everything but answer his reply: check on the girls, shower, prepare dinner, pour a glass of wine–you’re nervous, and you don’t know why. But you know you should probably answer soon before he becomes disinterested. So you get comfortable in bed with your glass of wine and pull open his chat.
You: Lol, know that all too well. Kids are little assholes, aren’t they?
The speed in which he reads your text is startling, you don’t even have enough time to close out of the chat. Then, he responds.
Kazuki: Hell yeah they are!
Kazuki: Sometimes I want to strangle my youngest. He’s at that age where he’s starting to rebel and question everything. I told him he was supposed to be the ‘easy’ one, but his knucklehead brothers are bad influences on him…Tell me, does it ever get easier?
You: Sounds a lot like my oldest. She used to cling to me like a koala but now she’s the ring leader, and I’m the enemy. My youngest still loves her mama, though (for now lol).
You: And to answer your question, I’d like to think so?
You take a second before continuing your response. Shoko told you to keep the mom talk limited, but this seems to be working for you so far, and he’s genuinely interested in what you have to say. So for once, you’re going to ignore her advice.
You: Kids go through phases. It's our job to reassure them that we’re not going anywhere. No matter how much they push us away or try to, that is :)
Kazuki’s chat bubbles pop up, then disappear. You think he’s deciding on what to say.
Kazuki: I can tell we’re gonna get along great. It’s nice opening up like this, you know? Talking to another parent. If I'm being honest, dating apps have always intimidated me…
Kazuki: People see kids as ‘baggage’, and it really bothers me. My kids aren’t baggage. They’re the best parts of me. And if someone doesn’t see that, then we have no business getting to know each other.
Kazuki: Sorry for getting all sappy. Just felt like I needed to say it.
His apology makes you frown. It feels like a breath of fresh air to hear someone talk about their kids so lovingly, because you feel the exact same way. You’re glad you downloaded the app, and you make a mental note to thank Shoko again later (after you debrief her about this).
You: Never apologize for speaking about your kids! And if we’re being absolutely transparent, that was my biggest gripe with downloading this app, too.
You: I’m so glad we matched each other. I’d like to get to know you more. And I’m hoping the feeling’s mutual?
Kazuki: It’s more than mutual.
Kazuki: Don’t want to get ahead of myself but how do you feel about dinner? There’s a cool high-scale restaurant in the city that I haven’t been to yet. Heard it’s got two Michelin stars despite opening up not too long ago.
The prospect of going on a sit-down dinner date has your stomach in knots. It’s been a hot minute since the last time you’ve done so, but you’re eager to know the man behind the screen on a more personal level. Plus, being treated to a high-scale restaurant with two Michelin stars doesn’t seem too bad either. You’re never one to turn down free dinner.
You: I’d love to, but how soon we talkin’? Gotta see if it’ll align with my schedule.
Kazuki: How’s this Friday at 8 sound? :)

The days leading up to Friday breeze by in a blur. For the majority of the week, it feels like you’re walking on cloud nine. Eventually, the conversation transitions from the dating app to exchanging phone numbers, and since then, the two of you have been texting back-and-forth everyday.
You talk about mundane things. Work, shows, movies, books you’ve recently read, what your kids are up to–but the other things? The other messages are flirty, and sexy, and filled with so much tension that it could cut a rope in half.
In between messages, the two of you have also exchanged a few photos. Nothing risqué or anything of that nature, just random photos of you throughout the day. The last one he sent was a few hours ago of him at work, captioned with: ‘Could this meeting be any longer?’.
You reply to the message with the ‘ha ha’ reaction, in consideration of not wanting to get him in trouble at work (even if he was the one who initiated the conversation). As the days go by, though, you make it a habit to update Shoko every step of the way.
Her first reaction to hearing about him was enthusiastic. That is, until you showed her screenshots from his profile. You vaguely remember her saying something that was meant as a compliment, but came out more like an insult.
“‘Oh, he’s a dad!” was her initial response, “oh, he’s a dad…and he really loves his kids. You’re meant for each other.’”
When you tried to ask her what she meant by that, she changed the subject. Every update since then has earned slightly more positive reactions, though.
Today, you ask her for more advice. Only this time, you’re on video call.
“Shokoooo,” you drawl, “our date is tomorrow! You have to help me find something to wear.” The panic in your voice is so palpable, she can almost feel your shaky hands through the screen. Flipping the camera, you hurriedly pan your phone around the closet.
“Breathe, girl, breathe,” she demonstrates first, before telling you to repeat the same motions. “Take me to that section over there–no, not that one–wait, yep, there.” You amble over to the area she’s directing you to through the phone.
“What’s that black little number right there?” She points. You prop the phone up on a shelf and scour through the section, tugging out a dress you haven’t seen in ages (which has you questioning how she even spotted it because it was pretty far back into the closet). Walking back into frame, you hold the fabric up to your body.
Shoko nods in approval, “That’s the one, babe. Try it on!”
It’d been about a decade since the last time you wore this dress. It’d also been about a decade since you were ever this small. Looking in the mirror, you run your hands over every surface inch, every crevice of the dress, in a newfound sense of appreciation for the adult weight you’ve gained since becoming a mother.
The dress was always stunning but it hugged everything perfectly even more so now. When you walk back into frame, your friend gives you a look of pure adoration. She’s so enthralled that she snaps a few screenshots for keepsaking.
“Thank god it’s Satoru’s turn to get the kids tonight,” she says, “‘cause you’re definitely getting some tonight.”
You roll your eyes, reminding her she’s on speaker phone. “Oh, please. It’s just dinner!”
“Not in that dress,” she retorts, wagging her finger in the camera. While the two of you continue to chat about the details of tonight, a knock on your bedroom door draws your attention.
“Mom, can I come in?” the voice sounds. It’s Haruki.
“Come in, hon!”
After you give the ok, you turn to Shoko and mouth to her to behave. Haruki turns the knob and enters, closing the door behind her. She sees you standing in front of the mirror before you see her, and silently utters a ‘wow’. You’re just about done putting your earrings in when you join her in the other room.
“What do you think, bun? Does your mom look hot?” you spin around, smoothing your hands down the length of the dress. You wait in anticipation for her approval, because if anyone could tell it like it is, it was always going to be a kid. Your Haruki was no exception.
“You look really pretty, Mom. I’m glad you’re going out tonight, I mean, you don’t really have friends so I think this will be good for you,” she elaborates, though you wish she would’ve stopped at the compliment.
Still, it puts a smile on your face to hear her verbalize that she’s okay with you doing something for yourself. You never quite discussed the prospect of getting back out there with your kids–and not even intentionally. It just never felt like the right time.
“You could’ve stopped at the compliment, punk!” you grab her, then wrap her in your arms, “but thank you. Love you, bun.”
“Love you more, mama.” Neither of you make the effort to pull away. Instead, you both stand there. Hugging, breathing, embracing each other’s warmth. You don’t always get hugs this good, so when you do, you savor it. Drag it out until your arms and legs get all tingly.
Or until someone interrupts. Another knock on the door. This time it’s Hana.
“Ew, what’s going on?” Hana feigns a look of disgust. You know she’s just jealous; she’ll never admit it, though. Which is why sometimes you have to force her to participate.
“Get over here,” you scrunch your nose, forcefully pulling her into your tight embrace. She tries to protest but eventually accepts defeat. You squeeze them both until they whine that they can’t breathe anymore. Then you squeeze them some more because this one’s for you.
“My special girls,” you breathe in, taking in all of their love. Soaking it all up so that tonight you have the courage to try again. To allow yourself a love of your own. When you let go, there’s a sniffle from the closet. It totally dawned on you that Shoko was still on the phone.
“They’re so big now, they don’t even know their auntie,” she fakes a sob, blowing her nose into a tissue.
“Mom, who’s on the phone?” Haruki queries with a confused expression etched onto her face. It suddenly dawns on you again that although you’ve been communicating with Shoko again, you haven’t exactly told them.
“Hey, you came in here to tell me something right, Han?” Your attempt to change the subject is poorly done, which doesn’t come as a surprise to you considering deflection has never quite been an ability you excelled at. Nonetheless, the look of suspicion they give you after is fleeting before they explain to you in unison that their father is here.
“Your father’s been waiting down there this whole time and nobody cared to tell me?” you whisper-yell, left eye twitching to emphasize your ill-preparedness. The girls only shrug their shoulders in response, like this was something you were just supposed to know.
“Well, you did force us into a hug and make us do all that Kumbaya stuff,” Hana mumbles under her breath.
“Okay, enough about all that. Are you guys all packed? Where are your bags? I don’t want your dad seeing–”
“You don’t want dad to see your date, right?” Hana raises a brow, all knowing. Sometimes she was a little too smart for her own good. You want to blame that on the private schools Satoru had them enrolled in, but really you just know she’s just a menace in her own right. She learned that from him.
“I agree with the kid,” a voice chimes in. You rush to the closet and grab your phone from the shelf. There’s a huge, shit-eating grin on Shoko’s face. Somehow she’s responsible for this. You don’t know how yet, nor do you have proof, but you know it.
“Okay, thank you, love you, bye!” Before you can hang up, Shoko blurts something.
“Tell him I said hi,” she begins, “–andnottogetahardonwhenheseesyou!”
You hang up the call and roll your eyes, chuckling to yourself because of her idiocy. When you enter the corridor, you hear a faint sound of hushed voices from downstairs. It’s only when you round the bannister at the top, when those voices become discernible and louder.
You stop at the top, and when your eyes meet his, it feels like all the air in your lungs have expelled. Suddenly, you’re hyper-aware of what you’re wearing, and the fabric, and the way it clings to your body. Neither he, nor you, look away–you should, you want to, but you don’t.
And in the time the two of you gaze upon the other, time stops for a modicum of a second. In this second, you and him are the last two souls in the world. At least, that’s how it feels anyway before he breaks eye contact.
You shift your gaze shortly after, and put on a trained smile. Those eyes of his were always so intense. You guess you forgot over the years how easy it was to lose yourself in the crystalline pools of them. Gathering your wits, you resume your movements and saunter down the imperial staircase.
“Hey, didn’t mean to keep you waiting. Sort of lost track of time, but I think the girls are all packed,” you say, your voice coming to a decrescendo upon noticing the way his eyes trail over your frame. They’re unreadable, though. Indifferent, and honestly, you’re not sure how to feel. So, you begin fidgeting uncomfortably with the rings around your finger.
Then, he smiles. It’s eerie and fake. “Not a problem, I haven’t been here too long. But, uh,” he begins ambling around the place, touching random objects around the living room, “Didn’t know you had plans. What’s the occasion? Going out for drinks with your colleagues?”
You furrow your brows, confused with his sudden interests in your plans. It wasn’t really like him to prod. “No, actually,” you rock back-and-forth on the balls of your heels, “i’m…i’m going on a date,” you finish with a pursed smile. He only nods his head in response, still walking around the place touching stuff, messing with the picture frames on the mantle. They’re all crooked now.
“How come this is the only picture you have up of me,” he asks suddenly. You know, that he knows, the answer to that. And he knows, that you know, you’ll indulge in his games anyway.
“The girls wanted them in their rooms. Why do you ask? You want me to go grab them and put ‘em all up around the house?” Again, he doesn’t say anything. Just gives you a final once over before heading back to the foyer to ask if the girls are all set to go.
“Yeah, but I can’t find my tablet, dad. Can I go look for it?” Haruki speaks up. “I thought I packed it.”
Satoru looks at the time on his watch, pinches the crease in between his brows. “Sure, kiddo. Can we make it quick, please?” He throws his hand in the air for emphasis, then points to his watch. Haruki nods, then runs up the stairs.
“Actually, you go on up too and help your sister. You guys are holding up dad,” you turn to Hana and gesture for her to head up with your head. She rolls her eyes, yelling up the stairs for her younger sister to ‘freaking hurry up’.
You and Satoru both turn to each other with wide eyes, laughing at the nerve of those children.
“They get that attitude from you, you know,” you point to him, driving your index finger into his bicep.
“You sure? Their mom’s got a pretty bad mouth on her, too. Or, have you forgotten?” He teases, bending his knees slightly to level his eyes with yours, intruding into your space. The smirk he dons is cheeky, too friendly–too inviting. You want to smack it off of him.
“Oh, shut u–” the sound of your phone chiming interrupts your banter. It’s a message from Kazuki, and you open it while Satoru stands over you. Probably close enough to read the message on his own if he wanted.
Kazuki: Hey, I hate to do this but I don’t think I can go through with tonight.
When you read the message, your heart drops into your stomach. There goes the other shoe, you think, fully embracing your pessimism. Who were you kidding, really? To think that tonight you’d go out and have a good time. Do something for yourself. It was stupidity.
Chat bubbles pop up on the screen. He has more to say.
He has more to say, and you’re fighting the urge to cry–to not shake out of sheer frustration while you’re still standing in front of Satoru. Because nothing would be worse than him seeing you can’t even land a date.
Kazuki: I recently just went through a divorce, and I know that I should have informed you about this before continuing our conversations…Especially since you’ve been so transparent with me about your own divorce and strife.
Kazuki: But if I’m being completely honest, I was scared. I genuinely wanted to see this through, at first. I wanted to forget about my ex-wife for just one night. But I realized I’ve been asking the impossible of myself…I’m still in love with her, and it’s because I’m in love with her that I won’t allow myself to lead you on any further.
Kazuki: I think we would’ve had a good time tonight. It's unfortunate we had to meet under such circumstances because you’re a really lovely woman, and I’m sorry an asshole is standing you up right now.
Kazuki: Take care. I know there’s a guy out there just waiting for his shot.
Satoru takes notice of the way your face drops as you read over the messages. Part of him wants to overstep his boundaries and take a peek at the screen. But he doesn’t. He gives you your space and takes a seat on the couch, waits for you to say something first.
In the meantime, he studies your face. Watches intently as your eyes become glossy the more you scan the messages, watches as your bottom lip catches between your teeth to hold back from crying. He thinks he knows what just happened.
Taking a deep breath, you lock your phone and put on another trained smile, “Well, looks like I’m staying in tonight.” Satoru dislikes when you do that. When you put on a fake smile and overcompensate to make others around you feel better, even when it’s so very obvious you aren’t. He wishes that sometimes you would just be selfish–act out.
And then you continue the façade. It makes his skin itch.
“I was too tired anyway, guess I can just catch up o–”
“Will you stop,” he spits, rising from his seat on the couch to stand. It comes out harsher than he intended, but he doesn’t regret it. You look at him like he’s got two heads as he walks over to the mantle and leans against it. His back is turned towards you, and the palms of his hands hold the crest of it. He uses it as leverage to rock on the heels of his feet. You can tell there’s something he wants to say because of the way his jaw ticks.
Satoru is never one to bite his tongue, so you’re not exactly sure why he’s choosing to be so restrained. If he wasn’t going to spit it out, you were going to poke. “What’s your problem?”
He chuckles at this, rubs his chin then pushes off the mantle to stand in front of you, gets all in your space again. The movement almost sends you back but you hold your ground, tilt your chin up at him and repeat the question. Slowly, this time with more venom.
“My problem? What’s your problem?” He breathes through his nose, his eyes flickering back-and-forth between your own. “Why do you always pretend like you’re not lonely? It’s okay if you were looking forward to having fun tonight. It’s okay to be upset and be mad at the asshole who stood you up!”
With every verbal prod at you, the gap between you decreases. His feet inch closer and closer to your own and force you to retreat farther until your back hits the wall. The coldness of it causes your breath to hitch, and you try to stay calm as Satoru encroaches more into your personal space. Being on the receiving end of his passion was always suffocating, you feel exposed under the intensity of his gaze–even more so as he continues to tear into you.
“Why do you even care?!” you cut him off, eyes wide and veins pumping full of adrenaline. “It’s not your place to be so invested in my life anymore! We’re not together, you don’t have to get so hot and bothered about things going shitty for me. I’m a big girl, and I’m perfectly capable of fighting my own battles.”
By the time you finish, you’re a heaving, shaking mess. He takes this as a sign to withdraw from your space, and goes to sit back down on the couch. When you finally settle your nerves, you join him, leaving a foot of space in between you. There’s an awkward silence, one that wouldn’t have even happened if he just respected your boundaries in the first place. Now he feels like the asshole instead of the actual asshole who dumped you. Taking a hesitant breath, he decides to speak up.
“Look, I’m sorry. I didn’t…It wasn’t my intention to come off so strong like that,” he begins, “I just wanted to let you know that you don’t always have to pretend to be fine. It’s not fair, you shouldn’t do that to yourself.” His eyes wander over to you reluctantly, like he’s scared that if he looks too long you’ll disengage from the conversation.
“It’s okay,” your voice is small, just above a whisper. You want to face him, but you know that if you do, you'll break into a million pieces. So you keep your gaze downward, busy yourself with the stray pieces of thread on the bottom of your dress. “You’re right, you know. I think I just…I think I just tell myself to expect disappointment so that when something bad happens, I’ll know it’s not because I got my hopes up.”
Satoru turns to you, and you can see him frown through your peripheral. Still, you don’t face him because you’re not done talking. But you thank him silently for listening without interrupting.
“Even though you’re right, I don’t appreciate the way you came on so strongly. We’re not married anymore, we’re not a couple–we’re co-parents. So if there’s something I want you to know about that’s outside of the scope of our kids, I’ll let you know. Otherwise, leave it alone.”
Satoru’s face softens. For once you’re being selfish, putting your foot down. This is the side of you he likes. “Okay. I respect that,” he says, “But can I ask you something?” The smile on his face is mirthful, like he’s got something else up his sleeves this evening. Skeptical, you finally face him with a raised brow.
“What?”
“Let me take you to dinner.”
You laugh in his face, even go as far as smacking his arm because you want him to know you found the joke really funny. He doesn’t budge, and that’s when you realize he’s being serious.
“Wait, what?”
“Let’s go to dinner,” he stands up, crossing his arms across his chest. You tilt your head in disbelief. You’re just waiting for someone to tell you you’re on that old reality show punk’d.
“Funny, I just poured my heart out to you and now you’re making fun of me,” you roll your eyes, feigning annoyance.
“I’m being serious,” he reassures, “you’re already dressed up. It’d be a shame for it to go to waste.” His eyes are twinkling with hope, and once again, you find yourself falling victim to their persuasiveness.
Being under Gojo Satoru’s gaze was suffocating.
Giving in, you ask, “So what are you gonna do? Drive all the way home to get dressed?”
The question is genuine, but the bastard just grins. “I’m a little hurt,” he throws a hand over his heart, “don’t you know me by now? I’m a businessman. I keep pressed blazers and slacks on me at all times.”
He swings his keys around his index finger, hoping that the promise of a spare change of clothes being in his car is enough to convince you to say yes.
“I don’t know…” you trail.
“C’mon, let me take you out. I promise you won’t regret it.”

Somehow he was able to persuade you into going out. After he changed into his spare clothes, you ended up telling your girls that there was gonna be a change of plans, and that they’d go home with their dad tomorrow.
Of course, before leaving, you made sure to leave some money on the table for pizza, and you also made sure to drill into their heads not to open the door for anyone except the delivery guy. You knew they knew the drill already, but it didn’t feel right to leave without saying it anyway.
“Be good, listen to your sister, she’s in charge,” you pinch Haruki’s cheek. Hana smirks, nodding her head in agreement with you.
“I will mom, I know,” she huffs, crossing her arms.
“And you,” your finger wags at Hana, her smirk drops. “Don’t provoke your sister, be nice. Act like you love each other, please.”
“Fine, whatever. I guess,” she grabs the knob to the door, ready to kick the both of you out already. “So does this mean the two of you are back together, or?”
Satoru and you turn to each other before answering in unison, “No.”
“Okay, cool. Well, have fun,” she practically closes the door on the two of you, locking it after. Satoru is just as dumbfounded as you are, but then you break into a fit of laughter.
“Those kids, man.”
“Your kids!” you correct, pushing him playfully as the both of you walk down the pebbled pathway. He finds his equilibrium in time to unlock the car and open your side of the door. You pause before ducking inside.
“Oh, how gentlemanly of you,” you jest, “And they say chivalry is dead.”
“How could it be when I’m alive?” He says matter-of-factly, closing your side of the door. He taps the top of the car before sliding across the hood to the other side. Nice to see some things never changed.
When he gets inside and turns on the car, he puts his hand on the back of your seat to back out. The proximity sends a shiver down your spine, and you have to physically refrain from letting your eyes linger on his jaw, and his arms, and the face he makes when he’s trying to concentrate.
You try to dispel these less-than-friendly thoughts by looking somewhere, anywhere else but him. But you can’t, and it’s irritating.
This is the second time tonight you’ve been this close, and it’s only this time that you realize something about him is…different. Earlier, he didn’t really smell like anything, but you quickly notice his smell has changed.
There’s a sort of piney scent coming from him. It’s not strong or obnoxious enough to blind your nostrils, but it’s enough for you to just barely pick up on it. You almost think it was premeditated, that he took the liberty of spritzing some on before walking you to the car. Before you separated, he’d made it a habit to wear variations of woody scents for you. If you can recall correctly, a passing comment you made about the cologne he was wearing that day is what sparked the habit.
Surely, this couldn’t be coincidental?
“You smell nice,” you blurt, filling in the silence.
Satoru glances at you, “Thank you.” You hate that from the corner of your eye, you can see his stupid little smirk growing bigger by the minute. He already had a big ego, it didn’t need to be stroked any more.
“Don’t let it go to your head, though. You usually smell pretty rank.”
“Ohhh, is that so? Guess I gotta start wearing this more often then, huh?”
“Sure, do what you want,” you say, trying to remain indifferent even though you’re failing terribly to hide your smile. When the car approaches a red light, you finally decide to ask the big question. “So where are you taking me?”
“You’ll see,” he glances over, “Just know I’m good friends with the owner, so last minute reservations weren't a problem.”
The rest of the car ride is silent, save for the low hum of the music playing on the radio. When you arrive at the location, Satoru makes sure to walk all the way around to your side of the door again and open it. Immediately after, the two of you are greeted by a young male. He’s wearing a white button down, black slacks, and a black vest with a red tie. Judging by his appearance, you assume he’s a valet driver.
Satoru drops his keys in the driver’s hands, and escorts you towards the entrance. The boy bows and goes to park the car. Looking around, you start to wonder where exactly this place is supposed to be. The area is dark and secluded, and from where you stand outside, it doesn’t sound like there’s supposed to be a restaurant here. You don’t hear any voices, you don’t even see any security or other passerbyers.
Still, you follow behind him like a duckling, only coming to a halt when he leads you to a door taller than the both of you. He gestures for you to back up, then raises his knuckles to blow a strong, single knock. You’re taken by surprise when a set of angry eyes appear behind a slot in the door.
The pair of eyes first scan over you, then Satoru. A gruff voice is second to accompany them, “Where can I get a good drink?”
“I heard the bar down the street is nice,” Satoru answers. The hatch to the door closes, then swings open the door, and the man behind it moves aside to welcome you in.
“Follow me, please.” Once he closes the door, he begins guiding you down the dimly lit hallway. After making what seems like your hundredth turn, you eventually reach a staircase. The man gestures for you to go on ahead, and you think this is him implying where the three of you will depart.
“Thank you,” you say softly, disappearing down the stairs. Satoru isn’t too far behind, keeping a pace between you. As you near the end of the long, narrow hallway, a stream of white light brightens up your whole path. It leads you down to another door like a beacon of light, and when you reach it, you can hear voices, live music, and dishes clanking on the other side. It’s bustling with life. A huge, joyous smile plasters across your face. It’s almost child-like in appearance, like you haven’t seen something this cool in a long time.
Satoru stands beside you and winks. “What d’ya think? Any idea yet where we are?”
“I think this is fucking cool, and hm,” you take a second to mull it over, “are we at a speakeasy?”
“Smart girl. Now come on.” Stepping back, you allow him to pull open the door, and when he does, there isn’t a word to describe the atmosphere of the place you step into. All you can do is stand there in astonishment. Before long, a man walks up to you.
“Welcome, what is the name you reserved under?”
“Gojo.”
Nodding, the host instructs you to follow after him. He leads you to a private seating area, somewhere far in the back that’s secluded from the other patrons. The space is much bigger, and much more extravagant. You know you’re only sitting way back here because Satoru is who he is. And in all the years you’ve known him, his connections were just another party trick in his arsenal.
The hostess seats you, then Satoru, and tells you that a waiter will be with you shortly.
“This is nice, really nice, but is it–”
“Legal?” he finishes your sentence, “don’t worry. It’s a modern speakeasy-style restaurant. There’s nothing illegal going on here, promise.”
While you wait for your designated waiter, your focus shifts from the man in front of you to the man singing on the stage. Up until now, his voice was white noise in the background, but then he started singing a tune scarily reminiscent of your past–and your breath catches in your throat.
If I ever leave you, baby
You can say I told you so
And if I ever hurt you
You know, I hurt myself…
Turning your gaze back to Satoru, you squint your eyes mirthfully in disbelief. You wonder if this is just a funny coincidence, if this is the universe playing her tricks, but you know deep down, that coincidences and Gojo Satoru don’t belong in the same sentence.
You open your mouth to speak, but quickly close it when you see the waiter approaching from the corner of your eye. He greets the both of you with a polite smile, then sets down two glasses of water.
“Good evening, I’ll be your waiter for the night,” he says, placing a menu in front of you, “Can I get you fine folks started off with a bottle of wine?”
Satoru nods, tells him to bring the best bottle of red they have and then gestures for him to come closer so that he can whisper something in his ear. All the while, you sit back in your seat observing, clicking your nails on the table until the server pulls back and bows.
When he departs, you immediately lean in over the table, and ask, “Just how much time did you have to plan all of this?”
Satoru feigns aloofness, taking a sip of his water, “What do you mean?”
You roll your eyes, gesturing at the stage with your eyes. Then, as if suddenly coming to a realization, he goes, “Oh, that? Yeah, I had nothing to do with that. But isn’t it funny they’re playing our old song?”
Now he’s smirking, with his elbow leaning back on the chair, and a gaze so piercing, you’re certain you’ll crumble into nothing unless you look away. So you do, avert your gaze back to the stage and sway calmly.
Is that any way for a man to carry on
Do you think I want my loved one gone
Said I love you
More than you’ll ever know
More than you’ll ever know
“So funny,” you counter.
Eventually, the server comes back with a bottle. “1982 Chateau Latife Rothschild,” he holds it out to present, “Is this alright?”
Despite the years spent with Satoru, and the many elitist events you often attended with him, your knowledge on wine had never surpassed anything but surface level. You knew the difference between good wine and cheap wine was the taste, but your taste buds had grown accustomed to store-bought, so if anything, store-bought tasted like heaven to you. Anyway, though, you nod your head and urge him to pour a glass.
“Thank you,” you smile, before gently swirling the glass and bringing it up to your nose to smell (something you only know to do after being the odd man out at so many company banquets). Satoru waits for you to sip your glass before he sips his. The way you melt into your seat is a silent assurance that you’re pleased.
“This is great, you’re amazing,” you tell the server, who seems pleased by your compliment.
“Glad to be of service, miss. Are you ready to order?”

Dinner goes by smoothly. In fact, it goes by so smoothly, you and Satoru finish the entire bottle of wine. Now you sit at the table, bellies full, faces flushed and sore from laughing, and now you find yourself telling him about the grocery store incident. If you had half a mind (a sober one), you’d shut up right this second to save yourself from the embarrassment. But you don’t. And Satoru’s very persuasive when you’re tipsy.
“Keep going,” he leans in, hand nestled under his chin. He’s completely invested in the story. Actually, as soon as he heard the words ‘store’ and ‘cute guy’, he just had to know more. And you begging him to change the subject didn’t help, not when the sadist in him loved to see you so embarrassed.
“Fine,” you hiccup, “It was so - so bad, Toru.” He doesn’t miss the way you slip and call him by the nickname you’d always reserved for him. It makes his heart race, and god, does he miss the way it sounds spilling from your lips. But he ignores the feeling, and refocuses on your story instead. Which, by the way, was proving to be a task in itself because his eyes couldn’t stop drifting back down to your lips. So soft, so–
“And then she said ‘we don’t believe in rings,’” you whisper, fist coming down on the table. The sound it makes nearly sobers you up, and you realize just how loud you’re being despite your table being secluded from others. Giggling like a kid, you continue, “I mean, how fucking insane is that?!”
“Something as bizarre as that could only ever happen to you,” he replies, laughing along with you, “those people were crazy.”
“The craziest,” you agree, throwing your head back in another fit of laughter. Gradually, the two of you begin to settle down, and once again, you find your attention being drawn back to the man on the stage. Only this time, he’s making an announcement.
“Good evening ladies and gentleman. Tonight I’ve got a special request,” he says, looking out into the audience. Looking at you. “This one’s for a very special lady who, from what I’ve been told, is a great mother that needs to start doing things for herself.”
The singer steps out of the spotlight and hands the note to a server. Your server. Then he begins to sing, and your heart drops into the pit of your stomach. It was your wedding song.
[...] I don’t even know how to love you
Just the way you want me to
But I’m ready (ready) to learn (to learn)
Yes, I’m ready (ready) to learn (to learn)
“Now this one? This one was me,” Satoru leans forward, and you swiftly turn your head to face him. He smiles as he watches your face go through ten different emotions before ultimately softening. It warms your heart to see how incredibly planned this evening was, despite the amount of time he was given to work with. Even so, it kind of scares you–because then that meant this was a grand gesture–that this was his way of saying something. And you weren’t too sure if you wanted to hear it. Your gaze drops to your lap, and Satoru frowns.
To fall in love
To fall in love
To fall in love with you…
“Look at me,” he says softly, but you don’t. “Hey, look at me.” He reaches over the table to take your chin in between his fingers. The touch alone feels electric. Sends liquid hot lightning down the column of your spine. Reluctantly, you meet his gaze, and like always, it’s suffocating. They’re so wide with hope, and so, so gentle in the way they hold you. The longer you gaze upon them, the more you convince yourself it’ll be okay if you surrender to them.
“It’s been years since we’ve divorced,” his voice is shaky, almost strained, like he’s actively thinking how to choose his words carefully, “and when we sat down that night, I thought it was what I wanted, too, you know? And for a while, it was,” he reaches a hand across the table to rest atop your own, “but you gotta know…you gotta know–you’re it for me. There’s no one else on this Earth that I want to start over with. You’ve always been the beginning and end of my story, and I’ll be damned if I let another man start one with you.”
Your heart is beating faster than you can even process what he’s saying. The only thing you’re focused on is not passing out in the middle of this damn restaurant. But then he’s squeezing your hand, and your focus is drawn back to those piercing, pale blues that even put crystals to shame.
“So what do you say?” he says, so softly, so tender. “Can we try again?”
Waiting for your reply, he squeezes your hand again. It’s like your soul is wandering the line between death and the living, and his touch is the tether that brings you back. In the background, the tune of the song sung at your wedding gives you a push of courage.
I don’t even know how to kiss your lips (kiss your lips)
At a moment like this
But I’m going to learn how to do
All the things you want me to
Yes, I’m ready
(Are you ready?) Yes, I’m ready
To fall in love
To fall in love
To fall in love right now
“Yes.”

The walk back to the car is hurried. Aided by both, years and years of built up tension, and the liquid courage currently bubbling in your systems.
The race back to his apartment is even faster. You thank the gods silently that it’s within close proximity to where you just were.
Once you get there, make your way past the doorman and concierge (who both give the two of you a knowing look), go up the elevator, and finally get into his loft–it’s over. Years of restraint, years of pretending, wanting–yearning, come crashing down.
There’s barely any time to close the door before he’s pushing you against it. His lips trail down the column of your neck, then come up to kiss your jaw, until eventually, they find your lips. And when they do, it’s instantaneous–that familiar feeling, the feeling that feels almost like falling.
Once again, for what felt like centuries, you feel again the rush of helplessness. The push and pull of the tide. It brings you down, down, down to the bottom of the ocean floor, and it’s unmerciful.
Kissing Satoru is like being shocked with ten thousand volts of energy. Like all this time you’ve spent not kissing him, has been costing you your life, and he’s the only one who can deliver you salvation. It’s all teeth and tongue for a minute. Messy, and sticky, and nasty. A true testament to the desperation brewing in the pits of both your stomachs.
The sensation of it all has your knees going slack, and that’s when he says–
“Jump.”
Obeying, you do just that. Jump right into his arms, and wrap your legs around his torso like you’ve done so many times before. The way you feel now is the way you used to feel before then, too. Like you were made to fit like this. To be held in his arms like you were molded from the same clay.
Carefully, he adjusts his grip on your body. Keeps his palms planted on the bottoms of your ass, and begins the trek to his room. He struggles a bit getting there because you haven’t stopped kissing since entering the apartment, but he figures it out after a stumble or two (which resulted in a bitten lip and you apologizing profusely through giggles).
“The turbulence up here is crazy, don’t blame me, blame the pilot,” you jest, kissing down his neck to make up for it.
“I’ll make sure to let him know,” he jokes back. As soon as he gets to the bed, he sets you down at the edge of the bed. You try to bring him down to your height but he stops you, wags his finger in your face playfully before using it to push you back into the bed. His fingers start to play with the fabric of your dress, and then his face takes on an indifferent expression. The same one from earlier that night when he first saw you walking down the stairs.
“Can’t believe you were gonna wear this for him…” he trails, lifting the fabric up slowly, eyeing you while doing so, “as if this dress doesn’t mean something.”
Of course, when Shoko chose it, its significance did make you falter–but in your defense, not once did you ever anticipate for him to see you in it. And you especially didn’t expect for him to remember it, the last time you wore it was almost a decade ago.
“I didn’t…” you start, a smile creeping on your lips, “think you remembered?”
“‘Course I did, how could I not?” He says more sharply than intended, taking offense. He takes offense because he spent the better half of the night showing you he remembered. The little things and everything else in between. Couldn’t you see that?
“It was our 4th anniversary. Bought you this dress and fucked you in it that same night. Funny how the second time I’m seeing you in this dress, the circumstances are the same except only this time we’re divorced,” he says, crawling over your body. “Guess I gotta show you just how much I remember.”
With that, he slips a hand under your dress, pulls your panties to the side and runs a finger down your slit. Oh-so-willingly, do you spread your legs for him. It’s almost subconscious, the way your body responds to him. And he revels in it. Lets his fingers work you, feel you, bring you to ecstasy. Then he heightens your pleasure tenfold when he kisses his way down your body, and takes a seat before you on his knees.
Unceremoniously, he pulls your body to the edge of the bed. Takes his time slipping your panties down the length of your legs, then kisses the insides of your thighs, before finally stopping at your mound.
Slowly, he lowers himself to your cunt, kisses your clit softly. Once, twice, three times. The pace in which he’s moving is killing you, to say the least. But you know he’s savoring the moment, making up for all the years he spent not kneeling like this between your legs. So you let him; let him caress you all over before he comes seeking the honey-sweet salvation dripping from your core.
The second his tongue makes contact with your heat, you find yourself clamping a heavy hand over your mouth. “Fuck, Toruuuu,” you drawl, back arching off the bed. Pleased with his abilities, he smiles smugly, using this as an opportunity to push himself even deeper. Up and down, he licks at your slit, uses his fingers in tandem with his tongue to prod at that spongy spot he knows you love.
“Tastes,” a harsh suck, “so good,” another, “better than I remember.”
You know he’s talking, but his words fall on deaf ears. You’re so caught up in your own high, you don’t even take notice of the obscene sloshing sounds coming from your pussy, or the moans you’re making. All you can do is lay there and take it as he takes, and takes, and takes from you.
Soon, you find your orgasm cutting through you like a knife, and you come with a strangled cry that has you biting back tears. Satoru talks you through the whole thing. He lays his head down on your thigh and continues working you with his fingers until you start to shake from the overstimulation.
For a few, you lay and stare at the ceiling. You think you can see the Milky Way–and all the constellations that make it up. It feels like your soul is floating beyond your physical body, and you don’t come back down to Earth until a sharp, stinging sensation brings you back. Did he just?
“Did you just bite me?” you lift your head, peering down to see the evidence. In all its glory, there it was; a red ring smack-dab in the inside of your thigh with teeth imprints. Looking at Satoru, he grins.
“Had to get you back from earlier,” he says, sitting back on his knees. You attempt to kick him with your foot, but he grabs hold of it. Pretending to be wounded, he gasps, “Is this how you treat the man who just gave you a soul-shattering orgasm?”
You roll your eyes, but to your dismay, it only encourages him to continue.
“Fuck, Toru,” he mimics, “oh my god, Toru. You fuck me so goo–”
“Alright, enough!” you manage to kick him this time, laughing as you bring up your hands to cover your face. “Keep carrying on like that and I won’t let you fuck me…” You’re serious in your bite, but he’s smirking. Like he knows you’re full of bullshit.
“Yeah right. You and I both know I make you feel too good.”
Feeling bested, you scoff, though, there’s no real weight behind it. While he begins to remove his shirt, you sit up and replace his hands. He relinquishes control and allows you to unbutton it until the item falls haphazardly to the floor.
He’s so beautiful, you think. Still so chiseled, so perfect after all these years since you’ve last seen him like this. At his most vulnerable. The only difference now is that there are more freckles littered across his skin. Back then, he’d say they were signs of aging, and he’d hate them.
But he’s older now. More mature. So much so that he even winks at you when you trace your fingertips over them.
“They suit you,” you whisper.
“Yeah?”
You nod your head, “mhm.”
Continuing your ministrations, you begin removing his belt. He holds your gaze the entire time it takes for you to unzip his pants and pull them down–and he doesn’t once shy away when you discover the wet spot on the front of his briefs. Slowly, delicately, you remove the soiled item and let it fall down to the floor with the rest of his clothes.
Still looking at him, you take hold of his length and fist him once, twice, experimentally. A dribble of pre oozes from his slit and you bring it to your mouth. All the air in his lungs expel into the air when you lick it off with your tongue, and god, he thinks he could come from that alone.
God, he’s missed you. Missed your touch, your lips–the way you hold him with your eyes like he’s something worth being gentle with. Nothing could ever compare to you, not even his own hand.
As soon as you’re about to take him in your mouth, he stops you. Pushes you back down onto the bed and slots himself between your legs. “No more playing, I’m tired of playing,” he breathes, lowering himself down until half of his weight is on top of you.
Guiding his cock to your entrance, he pushes past your folds with little resistance. The feeling of your cunt squeezing him in has his arms wobbling like jelly, but he musters enough strength somehow to stay up. You, on the other hand, are close to tears.
The more he eases himself in, the more you feel like you’re being stretched open (despite him previously prepping you). If you were being truthful, this wasn’t a complete shock to you. You’ve known that he’s always been big, but something about tonight feels different. Or maybe it’s just been too long since you’ve had something more than just your own fingers.
Even so, you try your best to ignore the burn of the stretch. You throw your arms around his neck and invite him deeper into you, hooking your legs around him so tightly that it renders his limbs useless. For a minute, all you can feel is the weight of him inside of you, and his chest against yours as they rise and fall asynchronously.
“Toru,” your voice is just barely above a whisper, but enough to make the hairs on the nape of his neck stand. “Make love to me.”
Heeding your request, he begins moving. Painfully slow, he unsheathes himself from you until only the head of his cock is inside, then pushes himself all the way back in with force. Again, and again, he repeats this motion. Pulls out, pushes in. Pulls out, pushes in, until he decides to increase his pace and set a steady rhythm.
Every thrust into you is meticulously calculated. Sharp, and forceful, and not once does he disrupt the rhythm. He listens carefully to the sounds you make. Even listens to the way your breath hitches when he hits a spot right. Everything he’s doing is perfect–and it’s to no surprise. Deep down, you know that Satoru knows your body like the back of his hand. He’d know it if you were all old and wrinkly. He’d know it if his soul reincarnated. Hell, he’d know it blind.
“Missed this,” he grunts, burying his head into the interstice of your neck, “missed you,” a kiss to your neck, “missed us.”
The veracity of his words render you speechless. He’s already professed his feelings for you tonight, but it feels even more real now that you’re beneath him. To be loved by Gojo Satoru was a feeling many couldn’t say they had the consolation of knowing. Only a few in his circle could hold that position–but only one person in this world could truly ever know his love to its fullest extent. You.
Satoru continues his mindless rambling, “I love you,” a thrust, “it’s always been you,” another, “was always going to be you.” Leaning back on his heels, he pushes your dress all the way up to reveal your breasts. Now it’s him who sits back and admires this time. As if he were reacquainting himself, he traces the planes and pastures of your chest with an eager hand. He runs it up and over each mound, squeezing and kneading the flesh experimentally.
Then, he dips down and kisses the space between them. Sucks and licks until the skin bruises, and he has evidence to prove tonight actually happened. Eventually, he withdraws from your chest and returns his focus on easing his cock in and out of your cunt.
“So beautiful,” he says, but it’s more to himself than anything. You’re so lost in your own pleasure, he doesn’t even think you can hear him. “Want you to cum on my cock, know you can do it, baby. Know you can,” he grunts, taking your hand and intertwining it with his own. Letting his head fall into your neck, he begins to quicken his pace. Fucks into you with everything he’s got and willing to give.
“Toru,” you finally manage to say, “‘m so close, keep going. Do it - do it inside.”
Do it inside. Do it inside. Do it inside. The thought is tempting, too tempting. It makes his dick twitch inside of you, and he swears if you say it again, he’ll actually do it. But he knows better than to listen to anything you say out of delirium.
“Trust me, sweet girl,” he cradles your face, to which you lean into, “I want to - I want to so fucking badly. But we both know you’d regret it later.”
Whining, your lips form into a pout, and the sight is so cute, he can’t help but to kiss it off of you. Compared to your kiss earlier, this one is much sweeter. Slower. More relaxed. He kisses you with the intent of making you dizzier than you already are, and it’s scary. Even so, you don’t pull away. You allow him to drink you up. Like your lips are the only source of water around, and he’s been quenched for days.
Finally, with a few more thrusts, you reach your climax. The pressure building in the pit of your belly pops like a balloon, and everything goes white. “Toru!” you shriek, arching off the bed and trembling in his grasp.
Using your arch as leverage, he keeps his hands underneath your back and continues to ram into you without abandon. You’re a babbling, wet mess at this point, and your cunt squeezing around him only encourages him more.
“Fuckfuckfuck, ‘m gonna - ‘m gonna,” he curses, balls beginning to tighten. Quickly, he unsheathes himself and fists himself the rest of the way. With an impassioned moan, he climaxes–spurting thick, white, ropes of seed all over your abdomen. Then, falls onto your limp body with a grunt, chest heaving rapidly, and slick with perspiration.
By this time, you’ve settled down enough to form a proper sentence. “That was…”
Satoru huffs, catching his breath. “Yeah.”
Still spent, he continues to lay atop you. And you, having nowhere else to go, let him. The two of you lay comfortably in silence like this for a long time. Just you tracing shapes into his back, and him purring into your neck. Both of you know you should be getting up, but neither of you make an effort to do so. In this moment, time is transcendent. There is no rush to move when time stands still for you.
Soon, that silence is broken.
“I love you,” you say, and there’s no elaboration. Not even a recant. In fact, you say it so nonchalantly, he’s not even sure it was real. You say it like you’ve never been more certain in your life, like it’s the easiest thing you’ve ever had to do.
“Really?” he queries, almost pathetically like the mere idea of you loving him is something unattainable. You look at him like he’s got two heads.
“Yeah, you’re my best friend. I’ve always loved you,” you admit, pausing your ministrations on his back, “I just had to relearn how to love you.” He smiles at this, hums into your neck to keep from crying.
“I’m glad we found our way back to each other,” he mumbles into your neck, “so where do we go from here?”
“From here we take it slow. We’ll learn together what it means to be individuals, and then from there we’ll see where it goes,” you say matter-of-factly, “no more repeating past mistakes.”
“Agreed,” he nods, “what will we tell the girls?”
That’s when your eyes widen and you sit up, forcefully pushing Satoru off of you.
“What did I say, what’s wrong?” he queries, sitting up on the bed. He watches you rummage around the room maniacally, head on a swivel as you run out of the room and return with a purse. You pull your phone out to see a slew of missed calls and messages.
“We forgot to call the girls!” You yell, showing him your phone screen of missed calls. Gojo jumps up to join you, one leg already sliding into his pants.
“Shit!”
Noticing the state of your appearance, you pinch the skin between your brows. “Satoru, I can’t wear this! You got cum all over it,” you groan, pointing to all the splotches of white. He tells you to wait a second before disappearing into his closet, then he comes back with a fist of clothes and throws it at you.
“I can’t wear this either, they’ll wonder why I’m wearing your clothes!”
Satoru runs to you and pull the dress off of your body, “We’ll wash it!” he screams, disappearing again out of the room, and to where you imagine, the laundry room. When he returns, he’s out of breath and panting. It’s only then do you realize how insane he looks with half his shirt buttoned, and his pants twisted around his hips. A giggle escapes your lips.
“What are you laughing at? Chop chop,” he claps, ushering you into his bathroom.
Yeah, you’d be lying if you said you didn’t miss this idiot.

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© arachine 2023
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Sundered 7: TIES
Pairing: Gojo x reader
• Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | …+
Genre: Angst
tags/cw: angst, babydaddy!gojo, babymomma!reader, motherhood, insecurities, arguments, mentions of sexual assault
word count: 6.0k


And he was happy. But never the happiest.

Naomi couldn’t count how many calls she had made but the wetness in her cheeks is proof of how frustrated she already is. “Please, pick up.” She bit the inner side of her cheeks, tapping her feet on the tiled floor. Naomi regrets what she did. She regretted that she still proceeded despite knowing how wrong it was.
She warned herself not to be greedy at the beginning of their relationship. She remembered telling him they’d take it step by step, not rushing anything because they were determined to make it work. Now that she’s thinking about it, maybe he’s only determined because he wanted to forget about you so badly.
“Mom, please. He threw me out.” Naomi spoke on the phone, tapping her feet as she stood in the middle of her room with her things around her. She took all the things necessary and left. Satoru would probably put everything she left in the trash but that’s the least of her concern right now. She lost everything she had with Satoru and it’s all because of her stupidity.
“What did you expect? You sexually assaulted my son and you want me to help you?” The woman hissed at her. Naomi was naive; thinking that she’ll have her back just because she wanted her for Satoru. “If anything I could even get you arrested—” She began but Naomi was quick to defend herself.
“You’re part of this. Didn’t you basically tell me to use a child to keep your son?!” Tears of anger pooled in her eyes as her hands shook in fear, fury, and heartbreak. Naomi remembered when Satoru’s mom would free her schedule so she could spend time with him and Yui. She would suggest activities and let Naomi tag along and that’s how they started to fall for each other.
Or rather, that’s how she started to fall for him while he just wanted an escape.
“But I never told you to do that to my son! Naomi, do you really think someone would side with you on this?” Every corner of Naomi’s room felt like they were closing in on her, ready to squeeze her till she was nothing but dust. Of course, no one would be with her. No matter what Satoru’s mother told her, she still chose to follow it so the blame’s on her.
“For someone who finished school with flying colors, your mind is dull.” She chuckled, letting Naomi hear all she truly is. “You got a pretty face, you know? That’s another reason why you caught Satoru’s eyes easily.” At that point, Naomi didn’t know if it was still a compliment. She’s pretty and kind, and smart and perfect for him, like she said. But why can’t she have all of him?
“But I’m afraid that pretty face would be useless now. If I were you I’d go start over alone somewhere far.” She clicked her tongue, cutting Naomi’s thoughts off every time she tried to voice them out. “Like, imagine graduating only to get jailed over some dumb, desperate shit? Naomi, you screwed up. And that’s why you lost all chances with my son.”
Naomi shook her head, the warmness of her emotions dampened the smooth skin of her face. “No, you made me…” She breathed out, covering her mouth before running her fingers through her hair. “I didn’t want to do that…No.” She bawled and bawled but the line only went more and more silent.
She fucked up and she’s right. The shame and the loss of self-respect are not something she could live through in this city. She must go, she must leave. Like how they always did when she was a kid; fleeing the scene with her embarrassment of a family who can’t live without humiliating them. They have no decent source of living so they gotta strive.
Now, she’s doing all of it again, all while losing all of it. Again.
“Save yourself. I won’t let them know of your plan. After all, you were once of help to my child. I’m truly sorry.” With that, the call ended; with Naomi sitting on the floor as she put a balled hand over her throbbing chest, and the thought of going away to start as someone new settled in the middle of her head. Naomi learned a lot from all the troubles she went through.
This time, she learned that you could have someone's body but their heart could still be somewhere else.
—-------------------------------------------------
“What is it?” Satoru heard through the phone speaker. Taking a deep breath, he shut his eyes, letting relief flood his veins and calm his shaking flesh. “When are you free?” There was a long pause before Satoru’s father replied, “You know I can make time.” Clearing his throat, Satoru massaged his temples, thanking the heavens that his nightmares weren’t real.
“Let’s meet later if that’s alright.” He whispered, scared that his voice would break. Satoru knows that he is the only link between the relationship of his parents. Just like how his older brother would’ve been the connection his father was hoping to keep his first, real love close. Until they got tired of it all; the matters brought by his mother. And him.
Just like how she drained Satoru out. And right now he just wanted to run away from her too.
“Of course, just send me the exact time.” Satoru nodded as if his father could see him, “Are you alright?” He asked after a few seconds as if sensing the trouble from his son’s voice. “Yeah, much better now, at least.” Satoru rubbed his eyes as he shook his head, eyeing the negative results of the vaginal swab test. “Dad, Mom can’t know.”
He’s almost sure that the request would prompt questions from his father, knowing that he’s aware of how close he is to his Mom. But he was surprised when he simply agreed, murmuring an “Okay.” before letting his son end the call. Satoru pictured him on his office chair as he nodded away, brows furrowed with worry like he always is when it comes to family matters.
When Satoru was a child, his nanny would tell him that his father wasn’t always so workaholic when his ex-wife was still there, co-parenting with him. After she ran away and left, his father started to immerse himself in work more. He knows that he tried with his mother since they were already there and married. But it was just never the same.
His father was happy with them. But he could never be the happiest again.
Leaning back on the chair, he put a hand over his eyes and let his frustrations stream down his cheeks. He let out a shaky sigh, grabbing the papers before looking at them in a brighter light. It’s negative. Nothing happened. You woke him up just in time. He tapped on Naomi’s contact, quickly typing his last message before attaching a photo of the results.
‘I’m mailing the rest of your things tomorrow.’ It only took a minute for her to respond with an apology but Satoru doesn’t care anymore to read it. He blocked the number as soon as he made sure that she received and read the message. He doesn’t want to be anywhere near her.
He knows he is wrong for not telling her about his feelings as soon as he can. But that doesn’t equal what she did to him and what she almost got them into. Satoru checked the clock before sending the time to his father, hoping to end all of this mess before the mess ended him.
His mother has been calling him nonstop, and he always had to pretend that he was not home during the previous days. He stayed in watching movies with his little girl, sending you videos and pictures every now and then. He slept in her room during those days, a desperate attempt to calm his brain down. His head hurts from overthinking.
Putting the papers back into the envelope, Satoru took it with him to his room. He made sure to put it in his bedside drawer, just in case some other shit comes up. If this happened before, he’d probably think that Naomi is not that kind of person. But after what she did to him, all of the trust and admiration she has for her went to waste.
Changing into something more comfortable, Satoru tried to take a quick nap. He doesn’t want to look this tired when he meets his father. He’d probably convince him to get a general checkup just to make sure that nothing was wrong. Satoru knows that if it weren’t for him, his father wouldn’t ever put up with his mom. He’d probably spend his whole life searching for his ex-wife.
A few hours of nap felt like nothing because when Satoru woke up, he still felt tired. The only difference is his heartbeat doesn’t sound like it’s trying to come out of his chest anymore unlike when he was waiting for the results. A little progress is still progress; just like how he’s trying to make it all up to you.
If Satoru’s being honest, he’d fall down to his knees and beg you to take him back if you asked him to do it. The only thing stopping him is his brain telling him how happy you are right now and how he wouldn’t want to destroy that. He can’t force himself to stop thinking about you but he can force himself to move on if it’s for you.
Satoru leaned his elbows on the kitchen counter, reading a text from his father saying that he was on his way. Another text was from you; it was a picture of Yui holding up a coloring book and a crayon. He was just with her earlier but he misses her already. He wondered if he could visit when he doesn’t have other things to do even if it’s not his schedule yet.
Sending a response with a small smile on his face, Satoru heard the doorbell ring, signaling his father’s arrival. He peeked through the spaces of his window curtains to ensure that it was him before opening the door. Satoru’s still unsure of what he’ll say but he hopes that his father can give him a better solution.
Satoru thought that if he ever cut ties with his mother, it’d be for you and Yui’s safety. He didn’t think that it’d be for him too. “Dad,” He gave his father a hug as he stepped in, following his son as they walked to his house. “What’s going on?” He asked as soon as Satoru closed the door. They walked to the kitchen, settling on one of the barstools.
“It’s because of mom…” He began, placing a glass pitcher atop the counter.
—---------------------------------------
“Smile~ We’ll send this to Dada.” You cooed, pointing at the camera as you tried to take a picture of your daughter. At first, she didn’t want to do it, wanting nothing but to play with her book and crayons but when she heard that her Dad wanted to know about it, she got real creative with the pose. “You don’t listen to Mama, anymore.” You pouted at her as you hit send.
She scrunched her nose, sticking out her tongue at you before picking on her colors. You still can’t forget how dead Satoru looked when he dropped Yui off. You wondered what he talked about with his mother that caused him to be like that. Even with the soft tone of his voice, you could hear roughness that probably came from the lack of sleep.
If it concerns you, then you definitely have to know. His mother probably said something bad about you, but you doubt that it’s affecting Satoru by how he was talking and looking at you. He just looked so done with all of it, but even so, there was still a tender look in his eyes when they met yours.
You sighed while looking at your phone as you waited for a text from Toji. He’s been so busy with work lately, you’re just glad that you already talked about your problems. You had a feeling that it wouldn’t end well had it stayed unsaid for a couple more days. It wasn’t completely back to normal, but at least, you’re both trying to make it better for each other.
“I would try,” He whispered to your ear as he hugged you from behind, “I can’t promise not to think of her–“ You turned around, looking up at him with a solemn look in your eyes, “I’m not asking you to not think of her, that’d be selfish of me.” He nodded, kissing your forehead, “Alright, what I mean is, I won’t make any comparisons.” You hummed.
“I need you to stop worrying about Satoru and I.” You put your head on his chest, “I know it’s easier said than done, but I just want you to know that I am with you.” Your fingers traced figured on his skin, “I’m keeping that in mind.” He placed his cheek on top of your head, sighing deeply as he let go of you.
“I’m taking Megumi to my Mom’s.” He pushed your hair back with his fingers, making your eyes flutter close as you felt his face get closer to yours and his breath ghosting on your lips. “I’ll see you later.” He pecked your lips, “Take care, I love you.” He murmured as he gave you a long kiss, before turning to get their stuff.
One thing that you notice about Toji is that he never waits for you to say anything back. You don’t want to take the words lightly, but that doesn’t mean that you don’t feel the same way as him. You still have a long way to go, and you don’t want to rush anything. When you mention it to him, he just says that he needs you to hear it.
“Mama, look!” Your daughter pulled you out of your head as she showed you a picture of a cat, “Dada buy Yui.” You looked closely at the picture, laughing as you realized that she was talking about the cake that they ate. “Yeah, you're right! That's what Dada bought you!.” You patted her head as she giggled.
“Yui, baby. Did meemaw come to see you?” You held her small hands, trying to keep her attention to you. “No. No meemaw.” She pulled at your hair gently, trying to color it with her crayons. “What about…what about Naomi?” You can’t help but chuckle as she pretended to think, eyes looking up as she pouted her lip.
“No Naomi!” Her answer gave you a bit of an insight. You would assume that maybe she was just busy, but hearing about how Satoru’s mother reduced her workload made you doubt it. Satoru sent you tons of pictures during his time with her but you thought that Naomi just wasn’t in the frame.
If the ‘talk’ between her and Satoru didn’t end well, you could only assume that he already told her about it. He’s probably down because he wouldn’t want to hurt her like that. With all the progress Satoru has made, you doubt that he’d be so happy to have broken a heart. She was still once a friend to him.
A heavy feeling settles in the middle of your chest, like an anchor weighing your heart down, thinking about how his mother would probably find a reason to drag you for it. But if that’s the case, you’re sure that Satoru wouldn’t let harm come to you.
With how gentle Naomi was, you couldn’t think of a worse thing to happen.
——————————————
“What did she do this time?” His father looked away, clicking his tongue. If one would ask Satoru, his parents would’ve probably divorced years ago if it weren’t for him. His father knows how he is with his mother, and the thought of giving him a hard time switching between the two of them pained him.
Satoru wished that he thought about it too before he decided to go and selfishly start over with someone else. Your words the night he confessed to you echoed in his head. He came to a realization that you probably wanted to ask him to come back but held yourself back as he let you know how happy he was with Naomi.
And he was happy. But just like his father, he was never the happiest.
“I don’t really know how to open this up to you…” He bit his lip, “…But I just want this to be over, Dad.” Satoru felt so vulnerable at that moment. The only time he had a talk this serious with his Dad was when he found out about your pregnancy. It was just more of a news, unlike right now, which is a call for help.
“Naomi…Mom and Naomi talked about…” His father’s eyes coaxed him as if sensing his distress. “Naomi tried to…” Shaking his head, Satoru breathed out. “Naomi wanted to conceive. Because our relationship was falling apart.” He can see his Dad’s brows pull together to a scowl, probably getting a hint of what happened.
“She talked to Mom about it and she…” The man sat up straight, bouncing his leg like he already knew what his wife did. “She said Mom brought up the thing about how you and him got together.”It was hard to talk about this to his father, knowing how sensitive it can be for him. “Naomi told me about it. I recorded it, just in case—”
“Satoru, what did your girlfriend do?” Satoru looked down, fingers fidgeting like he was a kid again. “And your mother’s involved? What happened?” Rubbing his face, Satoru threw away all his fears. If he’s not going to fix these problems, then who will? “She got me drunk, and then she tried to sleep with me.” He blinked fast, watching his father’s face.
“I heard her talking to Mom on the phone, and I took it from her. That’s how I found out that she played a part in all of it.” It was hard for him to accept. The person he used to protect, the one he always tried to understand was the same person who betrayed and put him in this position; the position that also made his father the person he is today.
Another long silence surrounded them. His father’s hand was balled into a fist, covering his mouth as he blankly stared at the marble surface. “Where’s Naomi?” His father pulled out his phone, and Satoru could tell just what he was about to do. “I don’t know. I’m sending her things away. I’m cutting her off. I’m filing a protective order against her and mom–“
Satoru didn’t get to finish his sentence before his father spoke again, probably finally taking in the information he just provided him. “I’m divorcing your mother.” His mouth fell half-open. His voice was low, serious, and full of all the grief that he’s been feeling for years ever since he lost his first wife and son. “And I’m sending that woman to jail.” He added, raising a finger.
“There’s…I don’t want that.” He breathed out, earning a questioning look from his dad. “You don’t have to send her to jail. I…I messed up if I just told her that I still have feelings for Y/N, then she wouldn’t have resorted to that. She wouldn’t have talked to Mom and this wouldn’t have happened.” He stood up, leaning on the counter as he squeezed his eyes shut.
Satoru thought about it too when he caught her in the act. But after some reflection, he realized his shortcomings, his mistake of not just telling her about what was really going on. Even though there was no excuse for what she did, Satoru can’t help but feel like he’s the one who caused all of this to happen. And he probably really is; a victim of his foolish choices.
“But other than that, I don’t want Y/N and Yui to be caught up in this. I don’t want to expose them to this kind of problem, they’ve been through so much because of me already. I just want to do better this time.” Thinking about dragging you into another mess made Satoru feel weak. He promised to make it up to you, and he’d do anything to prove that.
His father put his phone down on the table, taking in a deep breath just to calm himself. “But you’re not stopping me from divorcing your mother.” Satoru doesn’t know if it’s right to agree to that. It felt like he was encouraging the separation of his parents; celebrating his mother’s heartbreak.
But his father’s been suffering heartbreak for years. It’s only fair to set him free.
“It’s up to you. I…” Satoru shook his head, sure of the decision he was about to make. “...I don’t think I can just forgive and forget what she did. It’s not something small, and I’m not a kid anymore, Dad.” His eyes itched, ready to let his tears go any minute. “I don’t even know if I still want to be associated with her.” He turned away, sighing as he blinked away his pain.
When he and Naomi went for the examination, he made her spill all the details regarding the said conversation with his mother. It took everything in him not to fly into a rage while breaking down as he heard of it. All this time, his mother saw him as a pawn to keep his father, regardless of whose life she was tearing down; Satoru’s, his father's ex-wife, and his first son.
“I wanted to take you away when you were a kid.” His father admitted, looking ahead as he reminisced of the decisions he made. “I wanted to just take you and raise you with your brother. Of course, with the hopes of getting my ex-wife back.” He leaned back, tapping on the screen of his phone. The bitter tone in his voice can’t be missed.
“That was my plan when I found out about you. But when you were about a year and a half old, she disappeared. All I knew was she was…tired; drained of all the chaos that our son and her were exposed to. What with having to co-parent with me as I was with your mother.” His eyes played the emotions he chose to hide away many years ago.
“I know you know about this. She and I got divorced. I thought it was over for us, I thought I made the right decision to turn away and try another start. And I was dating your mother. Then we had you.” His arms were crossed and Satoru could almost see the similarities between his feelings to how he used to feel about yours and his relationship.
“Then, realization came running for me; haunting me in my sleep. I was ready to get her back again, but it was too late. She was already gone.” Satoru absently poured water for his Dad, listening intently to his story. “So, I felt like the only thing to do was to marry your Mom. I reminded myself that still have you, I can’t just spiral down.” He smiled at Satoru.
“I tried to convince, tried to brainwash myself that it’d be fine. That I could learn to love her and I did. Just not the kind of love that lovers have.” If his mother could hear his Dad right now, she’d get shattered. Satoru doesn’t want to see that, but she would have to. She has to understand that she’s putting this man through.
“I loved her because she loves me; because she cares for you and me.” Leaning over to pick up his glass, he looked his son in the eyes. “But true love is unconditional, Satoru. It should not have a reason.” He took a sip, pursing his lips before continuing. “Reasons might vanish, and when it does, so will the love you feel for that person.”
In the middle of it all, Satoru could only think of you. Why does he love you? When did he realize that he loves you? How did it happen? He doesn’t have an answer for it. He cannot find a reason for it. He doesn’t remember loving you just because you put up with him, he doesn’t remember falling for you just because of the life you created together.
All that he knows is that one day, he woke up and he already knew that he was in love with you. Like he’s been doing it for years; like that’s all he’s ever known.
—-------------------------------------------------
“I’ll keep in contact with you regarding the proceedings.” Satoru’s father spoke on the phone, stepping inside his mansion and smiling at his helpers. He asked Satoru if he wanted to have a word with his mother but the thought of having to look at her after what she tried to make his ex-girlfriend do makes him feel dizzy.
“Honey, you’re home.” The woman tried to welcome him with a kiss and open arms but he quickly turned his head, rejecting her. “Come up to my office, we got something to talk about.” The mask of a loving wife was quickly covered with fear and dread.
“What about in our room? So, you can rest.” She nodded her head once, trying to coax him but he was tired of closing his eyes and numbing his heart from feeling the pain and regret of having to lose the love of his life for the comfort that this woman offered him before. “In my office. It’s not a small matter that I could sleep on.”
Leaving the woman baffled, he made his way upstairs, not waiting for her to walk beside him. There was a deafening silence in the big room, save from the footsteps of her husband and the door of his office slamming with such force that it sent a crack in her heart.
She took a deep breath and ran her palm on top of her dress, thinking of all the reasons she could give him just to prove her innocence. She didn’t want any of that to happen. She didn't think that Naomi could be so dumb as to come up with such a heinous and unpleasant plan.
That wasn’t even what she did to Satoru’s father. It was just working to keep them together. And that’s why Satoru came.
With her found determination, she held her head high. Swallowing the terror rising up her throat as she let her thoughts convince her that she did nothing wrong. She never explicitly told Naomi to do that, she’s the one who schemed that. There’s nothing to be afraid of.
She walked up the stairs, caressing the smooth, cold surface of the handrail. Satoru wouldn't allow anything to happen to her. He’s her boy, her pride and joy. He’s the only ally she had when his father was openly pushing her away.
Satoru wouldn’t just ruin what she and his father had because of baseless information from his sick girlfriend. Entering the office, the man sat on his swivel chair. Forehead pressed to the heel of his hand. “What is it, dear?” She smiled sweetly at her husband, appearing unaware of what he had in mind.
Oh, how she wished she was just unaware of it all. She wished that she didn't know what the problem was. She wished it wasn’t what she thought it was and that she was just overthinking because of how– “I want a divorce.” Those four words halted the spinning of her world.
“What?” She raised her brows, checking if it was just her mind playing tricks on her and making her hallucinate. “I want a divorce. And I want it as soon as possible.” His eyes no longer held any emotions towards her; no sadness, bitterness, fading love. None. Not even pity.
“Listen, honey, I didn’t think that Naomi would do–“ She took quick steps towards him, hoping to get him to listen. “So, you knew about it?” He glared at her, “You knew about it and you didn’t tell me anything?” He shook his head, and she could only open her mouth.
“Doesn’t matter. Satoru told me everything.” He stood up from his seat, towering over her as he stared her down. “It’s nothing like that–“ She breathed out, panicking. “I’m not really interested in what you told Naomi. I’m just thankful that my son’s safe.” He stepped away from her.
“What I want to do right now, is to be free from this.” It’s over for her. All the alibis that she was composing, thinking of for this moment are useless. He doesn’t need an explanation, this was simply the final push that he needed to kick her out of his life. And probably out of Satoru’s too.
“Please, don’t do this. We’re already too old to–“ She tried to grab his hand and he only grabbed it with the other to put it away. “You’re right. We’re too old, our son’s too old for me to still pretend that we want to be in this position.” Shaking her head, she stepped in front of him, blocking his way. “Please, listen. I wouldn’t do something that could harm–“
“I know,” His voice was calm. “Of course, to harm him wasn’t your intention, right?” She nodded eagerly, thinking that he was finally listening to her. “But you wanted to decide for him. You got in between him and Y/N, then pushed this woman on him because you thought you knew best for your son.” Tears fell down her eyes, and she lost all hope.
“Now, look at what you did to him.” He gritted his teeth, stepping forward to get her out of his way. “But this is not just about our son anymore. This is also about me, finally choosing to do what I should’ve done a long time ago.” Opening the door, he spoke to her one last time. “All you have to do is sign. The actions that your son will take is all up to him.”
With that, he left her with all of the nightmares of their past coming back. How he only wanted the best for his sons, how he wanted to take full custody of Satoru, how he wanted to get back together with his ex-wife, and how he only married her because she was gone. She was never the first option. She was never the original pick.
She wasn’t chosen, she just happened to be already there.
—————————————
“Hey,” You heard Satoru speak as Toji opened the door for him, nodding. This was kind of similar to how they first saw each other but you’re just glad that this time, it’s a lot calmer. Megumi ran to his father, peeking up at Satoru as he waved at him.
“Yui, your Dada’s here.” Toji left the door open to let Satoru in. Megumi was holding onto his pants, staring back at Satoru. “Yui Dada,” He picked his toy up, staring at a distance before walking closer to him. “Blue!” You laughed from the kitchen, as you packed some snacks for the little girl.
Today, you’re going to the zoo as Yui requested. The animal drawings from her coloring book got her asking you to call her Dada late at night, just to babble about it. “He’s referring to your eyes,” Toji spoke as he went back to the living room to pick up some of the toys.
“Megumi, it’s not good to point at people, what did I tell you?” He warned the toddler as he went back to your room, eyes meeting yours as you made your way to Yui's room. “Ah, yes. Yui and I have the same eyes.” Satoru smiled at the child.
“Dada!” Yui ran towards him, stomping her shoes extra hard to show him how they light up with dancing colors. “Woah! Did Mama buy you those shoes?” He opened his arms, urging the little girl to run to him and she happily did, giggling as she nodded. “It’s awesome!” You smiled at how he tried to flatter his child, encouraging her to do a little jump.
“Where are we going today?” You asked her in a playful tone as you put the lunch bags on the coffee table in front of them. “Zoo!” You watched a Satoru give her a sincere smile, patting her hair gently while complimenting her little butterfly clips. “I’m sure Megumi’s been to the zoo before.” He poked the little boy's tummy.
“Yeah. Animals. Bears and lions.” He stood behind you, peeking at Satoru as he talked. Megumi isn’t usually shy, but he doesn’t easily warm up to people. “We went there on his second birthday.” You almost jumped at Toji’s voice behind you as he picked up his child. “He’s a smart kid.” Satoru answered with a friendly smile.
“You guys should come. If you want..” It surprised you that he was initiating something like that. Although, you know that Toji wouldn’t be so comfortable with that and would most likely reject the offer, it’s still nice to see that Satoru’s trying to make an effort to get along with him.
“That’d be nice but his grandma's waiting for him,” Toji answered, chuckling awkwardly. “Dada work,” Megumi added, earning a hum from his Dad. Making sure that the bag is packed with everything Yui needs, you zipped it up. “You ready to go now?” You tapped the toddler’s cheek, feeling Satoru’s gaze at you.
“Alright, let’s get going.” Standing up with his daughter in his arms, he took the bag from your hands. He put the toddler down to hug her friend goodbye, before walking hand in hand with her outside. You laughed at how she kept squealing with each step she took, looking up to see her Dad’s reaction.
“You guys have fun, alright? I’ll just lock the doors before we go.” Toji pulled you to him, giving you a kiss. “I’ll be back later.” You put your hand around his neck, standing on your tippy toes before pecking his neck. With that, you walked out the door to join your toddler who was patiently waving at you from her car seat.
“Okay, it’s zoo time!” You wiggled your brows at her as you slammed the door shut, making her giggle. You checked your face in the mirror, trying to ignore Satoru’s soft eyes as he watched you. “How are you?” You tried to start a conversation but it was quickly interrupted as you searched around for your daughter’s binky.
“Maybe we left it inside,” Satoru spoke, opening Yui’s bag to help you find it. “Yui, where did you put it?” Remembering how she placed it on the coffee table as she showed off her outfit to her father, you started to unbuckle your seatbelts but Satoru stopped you. “It’s alright, I’ll get it.” He was already stepping out of the car before you could stop him.
Satoru jogged up your steps, knocking a few times before proceeding to open the door. Toji was just about to open it for him when he entered, “It’s Yui’s pacifier. She left it.” He put on the most polite smile he could muster, wanting nothing but to get rid of the awkwardness between them if they were both going to be in your life.
“Oh, alright. I thought it was someone else.” Toji let out a rather awkward chuckle, not knowing how else to react or what else to say. But just as Satoru uttered ‘thanks’, Toji remembered the thing he’s been thinking of for almost a week now. “Uh, Satoru,” He called, making him pause as he held the door open.
Her brows raised, waiting for him to say something. Toji doesn’t know if you’d be happy about this but it’s better than just letting his feelings, thoughts, and opinions all pile up inside of him. This is for you and Yui. Not just for him.
“I’ve been thinking about our situation with Y/N and… I was wondering if you could set aside a bit of your time for a chat?”

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Die For You [Fushiguro Toji x Reader]
TW : NON-CON
You close your eyes as Toji's big hands caress your head. The lover who is fifteen years older is now busy pampering you.
You know that there are some people who don't approve of your relationship, including your parents. However, you continued the relationship despite knowing the risks.
Even so, you still think about your father's words. He said that he would never approve of your relationship at any time.
Toji who heard that immediately looked at you with a hurt look. If only Toji could know that you were as hurt as he was.
You let out a rough breath and hugged Toji's body tighter. His body felt very warm and you liked that.
"Don't you think about leaving me?" Toji asked suddenly.
You immediately broke your embrace and looked at him in disbelief. "How could you think of that? I would never leave you, Ji. Instead, I thought that you would leave me."
Toji sighed softly. "Well... I know that there are many men who are more suitable for you. Men who are richer, more handsome, and most importantly younger."
You held your breath when you heard that. You being twenty-five years old and Toji being forty years old often made him feel insecure.
"I know that I don't deserve you, but I want to improve myself. I want to be the one who stands by your side until the end," Toji continued.
"Yes, dear. You're the only one who will be with me forever. So don't think about other people's words anymore, okay? I'm sure mom and dad will definitely accept you," you said.
Toji was silent for a moment and looked at you. "But what if they never approve of us? I don't want us to be stuck in this status."
You realize that Toji is not in the right state of mind, so you try to calm him down. You pulled him into your arms and stroked his head.
"Toji... My mom and dad must be softening up to you. Especially since you've never been married," you said.
Toji looked into your eyes and he immediately pushed your body on the bed. You winced as you felt the pressure on your shoulders.
"(Name)... I'm not sure if they'll accept someone like me. The only way is to make them have no choice but to accept it."
Your face paled as Toji undid your shirt and pants. His hands are very skillful in removing your underwear and now you are naked.
You could see the lust in Toji's eyes. The man kisses you roughly on the lips and deliberately leaves many marks on your neck.
The man then reached down and sucked your nipples greedily. His left hand plays with your nipple and it makes you let out a sigh.
"MMNGH~!"
"Isn't it good, baby? Her pussy is so wet already," Toji said while inserting two fingers inside.
You're trapped under this man who's almost 190 cm tall. You know there's no point in running away now.
Toji is capable of catching you quickly. Then he'll give you some punishment for a naughty girl like you.
Without realizing it, your pussy juices are flowing more just thinking about it. Toji rounded his eyes and chuckled.
"What are you thinking about? Don't tell me you're happy to be impregnated, huh?" Toji asks.
Hearing Toji's words, you immediately froze. "Y-you want to get me pregnant?" you ask in a trembling voice.
Toji grinned. "I already told you that I would do something that they would inevitably have to accept, right?"
The man slams his cock into you and your eyes immediately bulge upwards. If only Toji knew that your pussy would never get used to his unnatural size.
"AH-NGHHH!!!" you squeal.
Toji immediately moved his dick without letting your body get used to it. The man did tend to play rough, but this time was different.
Toji never did anything without your consent. Besides, where did he get the idea to impregnate you?
You know you're not ready to get pregnant. You heard horrible stories from mothers and you became scared because of it.
"Ngh- Toji... Please don't come inside... I'll convince mom and dad..." you said.
Toji stroked his dick as deep as he could and looked at your face. "Where did you get such confidence from, hm? This is the only way, baby."
Your body jumped every time Toji pushed his dick inside. You unconsciously touched his sweaty chest and looked into his eyes.
You love that man so much. Damn, if you could you would throw away your life just to be with him. But life doesn't work that easily.
Toji quickened his pace and laughed. "Our kids will be really cute, right? I hope they look like you."
"T-they?" you ask in horror.
Your boyfriend chuckled. "I never said I only wanted one child, did I?"
Toji's movements became increasingly rough and brutal. You reach your orgasm quickly and you hug Toji very tightly.
Fluid oozes out of your pussy and it makes the game even smoother. Toji thrusts his penis as deep as he can and squirts his sperm inside your womb.
You hold your lower abdomen as you feel the warm liquid. Shit... You can only hope that nothing will happen because today is the peak of your ovulation.
Toji laid down next to you and hugged you very tightly. You know you're weak with his spoiled attitude.
"Don't ever leave me, okay? You're all I have, (name)," Toji said.
You sighed softly and nodded. "Yes Toji. But next time ask for my approval first if you want to come out inside, okay?"
Toji looks at you with a sullen look and you laugh at that. Well, you give up. Maybe you'll let Toji do whatever he wants. Because you love Toji.
***
extended version available on patreon. https://msha.ke/whitelunaria
preview extended version :
Toji chuckles and goes back to rubbing his dick on your panty-covered pussy. "Actually, he's ready to fertilize your womb again."
"Don't you feel sorry for Gumi? He's only two months old, for god's sake, Toji," you say, rolling your eyes.
Your husband chuckled and lifted your shirt. His eyes gazed at your breasts with a twinkle in his eye. He immediately sucked on your nipples.
"Ngh... Don't drink too much Ji, poor Gumi," you say.
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Our Secret [Higuruma Hiromi x Reader]
You stretch your body and sigh softly. Damn, it seems like the moment you lay down your body, your spine will immediately make a sound.
Being a secretary is not the job you dreamed of. When you were in high school, your only goal was to become rich without any struggle.
Well, of course that's hard to come by if your parents aren't the ones who have an inheritance that won't run out until the seventh generation. That's right, you're a victim of capitalism.
Even so, you're grateful that your boss is a good person. Well, at least that's how Higuruma is in your eyes.
You often hear that Higuruma is a very cold person, and that makes many people uncomfortable. But he's a very different person to you.
Actually, he's also cold with you. But his attitude proved otherwise. That man always helped you when you were in trouble.
You remember when you had a fever due to a virus. You couldn't even lift yourself up. However, suddenly there was a courier who delivered medicines as well as food.
When you found out that the courier was sent by Higuruma, of course you were shocked. You wondered if Higuruma felt guilty for contributing to your illness.
"(Name)?" called Higuruma and you immediately turned around.
"Why sir?" you ask.
"If you're tired, just lie down on the sofa for a while," said Higuruma while pointing to the sofa in his room.
Sometimes you feel like Higuruma is two decades older than you, when in reality he's only five years older than you.
You nodded and quickly walked over to the sofa and picked up the blanket that was already there. You close your eyes and fly off to dreamland.
You woke up when you heard Higuruma's footsteps, but since you were still very sleepy, you decided to keep your eyes closed.
"(Name)... Why are you so beautiful? Don't you think that I have to be nervous every day when I see you?"
Your body immediately stiffens upon hearing his words. Wait, for some reason you weren't sure if the person speaking was Higuruma. But his voice convinced you that it was indeed Higuruma.
"You know how many guys want to be with you, including me. Unfortunately, your aura makes us all reluctant."
His fingers smooth your messy hair. He looked at you intently with a small smile.
"I'm already this close to you, but why is it so hard to say it?" she continued.
Higuruma then gets up and exits the room. When you hear the sound of the door closing, you immediately open your eyes wide.
How could your handsome boss like you? Unconsciously your heart beats very fast and your face turns red. Damn.
A few days pass and you praise yourself for being able to act well in front of Higuruma as if nothing ever happened between you.
Now the two of you are in the room where the files are kept. You're helping Higuruma to find the case he wants to use in the trial this time.
You wipe the sweat off your face even though the room is air-conditioned. After finding some of the files you were looking for, you quickly placed them on the table.
You walked towards the door to open it but you froze when the door wouldn't open. Higuruma who realized that tried to open the door but the result was the same.
You both fell silent and looked at each other. Higuruma sighed softly and quickly grabbed his cell phone to look for help.
"I've heard that it locks suddenly here because of the automatic door. They say it can take up to an hour to fix the lock," said Higuruma.
You just gape and nod, accepting your fate. You sit down on a chair and look back at the files you've picked up.
"(Name)," Higuruma calls and you turn your head.
"I knew you were awake when I confessed to you."
If only you could escape without needing money, you probably would have done it long ago. Your body stiffened as soon as you heard those words.
How could you possibly say that you couldn't discuss it because you also liked Higuruma? Well, who could avoid that man's charm?
"What's your answer, (name)?" asked Higuruma while caging you with both hands.
You closed your eyes. "A-actually I've liked sir since I started working... But I don't know how to say it."
"Can I kiss you?" asked Higuruma quickly and you nodded.
Your lips met and you closed your eyes. Higuruma is very good at kissing and you feel like you're going to melt from it. You were surprised when you felt Higuruma's thigh rubbing against your crotch.
"Sir... here?" you ask with an incredulous look.
"Why not? I know there's no CCTV here."
You swallow your saliva and fight with your common sense. But your lust wins out and you quickly embrace Higuruma and kiss him.
The man moves quickly to take off your panties and now he's licking your pussy. You feel like you're being electrified every time his nose hits your clit.
You've never felt like this before. It seems Higuruma is gifted in satisfying women.
Every time his tongue pierces your pussy, you continue to let out a sigh. Both of Higuruma's hands hold your thighs to keep you from moving.
Your pussy gets wet quickly and the man stops his activities and looks at your face. He is immediately stunned to see your flushed face with watery eyes.
You turn your face away. "Sir's nose makes me wet quickly."
Higuruma chuckled and bit your ear. "If it's just the two of you, just call Hiromi, okay?"
You gave a small nod. The man then pulls down his pants and you roll your eyes when you see his penis pointing up.
"H-hiromi, are you sure you want to go in?" you ask in a trembling voice.
To be honest, you've never had penetration before. But you have had oral sex.
"Have you ever penetrated before?" asked Higuruma and you shook your head quickly.
The man gave a small nod. "Then I'll take it slow. But if you don't want to, let's stop here."
Crazy! How could you stop when your lust is at its peak! You shook your head and immediately held his penis with a pleading look.
Hiromi smiled a little and immediately swiped hers and then inserted it slowly. You close your eyes from the pain, but Hiromi kisses your forehead gently.
When the entire length of her penis is inside, Hiromi pauses and gazes lovingly at your face. He then moves his penis while kissing your face.
"You're so beautiful, baby. I never thought that you would like me too," Hiromi says.
You try to speak between your sighs. "Hiromi.. ahh.. handsome and smart ... How can I not like you?"
The two of you return to kissing but your activities stop when you hear Higuruma's cell phone ringing. Unfortunately, he keeps picking it up while thrusting his hips.
Your face turns pale but Higuruma just grins. Damn, you have to hold back your sighs as he answers his phone.
***
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"Okay, take it easy. I and (name) can still wait," Higuruma's gaze flickered to your face, which was holding back a sigh.
The man then turned off his phone and looked at you mischievously. "Apparently you like it when other people hear you?"
You shook your head. "N-No~!" you reply.
Higuruma's right hand smacked your butt and you immediately let out a moan. "Liar. So why were you twitching when I said that?"
#fanfic#jujutsu kaisen#methimlastnight#higuruma hiromi#jjk higuruma#higuruma x reader#higuruma smut#reader
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Mischievous [Fushiguro Toji x Reader]
Your eyes opened and you saw a man who was wrapping his arms around your waist. You looked at him gently and stroked his hair.
"Toji... Wake up..." you say in a small voice.
The man who was ten years older than you opened his eyes and he looked at you with a pleading gaze. You couldn't help but chuckle.
"You said you wanted some quality time today before you go back to work tomorrow?" you say.
Toji just nodded and buried his face in your chest. You honestly never thought that you would be dating Toji.
The two of you have a huge age difference even though you are both adults. You met Toji one year ago, when you were only twenty-seven years old.
You first met him when you were planning to build your own house. Toji was an architect introduced by Gojo to help you.
At first, you were already fascinated with Toji. Come on, aren't older men more charming?
But you restrain yourself and think that Toji must already have a partner. Come on, with such a handsome face and mature age, how could he still be single?
Turns out your guess was wrong. It all comes to light when Toji starts talking about things other than the business of the two of you and you find out that he's single.
You became eager to approach him. Toji, who seems to have known your moves, immediately asked you to establish a relationship.
You accepted without further ado, and now the two of you are spending time in the house you designed together.
"Your mom and dad keep asking me when I'm going to propose to you," Toji says suddenly.
You chuckle and stare at the ring adorning your sweet finger. "When did you tell them that we were planning to get married?"
Toji scratches his head. "I'm a bit scared. What if they suddenly change their minds and don't want to accept me as a son-in-law?"
Your finger jabbed Toji's head. "Your overthinking is weird. How could they refuse you who is my boyfriend after seven years of being single?"
"Well, who knows. We never know when people's minds will change."
You smiled and kissed Toji briefly on the lips. You then quickly stepped into the kitchen and prepared the ingredients for cooking.
"What do you want today? I only have chicken," you asked.
Toji hugged your body from behind. "I'll eat whatever you make."
You smiled back and continued your cooking. Toji knows he can't do anything else, so he just washes every utensil you've finished using.
The two of you have finished breakfast and now you head to your room to get the items under your desk. The table is quite short and narrow, so you have to bend down to pick it up.
Your hands manage to grab the item, but somehow you can't get yourself out of there. Your face pales and you try to call out to your lover.
"TOJIII!!! HELP!!!" you shriek in panic.
The man suddenly ran to the source of the voice and he saw your upturned position. Toji frowned and tried to figure out what was going on.
"What's wrong with you?"
"I'm stuck here, I don't know why. Please let me out, Ji," you said.
You waited for Toji's reply, but you couldn't hear him. You were surprised when Toji suddenly smacked your ass.
"Damn it, do you know how tempting your position is? Helpless... and only I can help," Toji says.
You don't know why your pussy is instantly lubricated when you hear Toji's words. That man can control your body just by the words he says.
"Toji... I want to..." you whine.
Toji chuckled and immediately opened the pants you were wearing. He inserted two of his fingers into your pussy and you sighed.
After a few moments of foreplay, you can hear Toji opening his pants. He rubbed the head of his penis against you.
"Say what, baby?" asked Toji.
You swallowed your saliva. "Toji... I want to put Toji's dick in... It's so big..." you say.
He thrusts his hips and your eyes fly open. His gigantic penis is capable of crushing your body.
"AH! It's so good-hhh! Toji's dick is so big!"
Toji grinned and smacked your ass again. "What would your parents say if they found out their daughter turned out like this?"
"They won't say anything... They're expecting grandchildren anyway heheh.." you laugh.
"Tskckck, even so they must not know that the child they raised turned out like this, right?"
Every time Toji's dick touches your womb entrance, you get closer to your orgasm. Hell, Toji's thumb is playing with your clit and it's making the pleasure multiply.
"NGHH! Yours is so good babyhhhh.." sighs Toji.
You can't hear Toji's words anymore. Your brain was already full of the pleasure you were getting.
The veins on Toji's penis seem to scratch your pussy and it makes you feel even hotter. Not to mention the size of his penis that makes your pussy have to work harder.
" I WANT TO CUMM!!!" you squeal.
"Cum babyhh... I'm about to cum too, AH!" replies Toji.
You reach your orgasm and Toji immediately pulls out his penis. His sperm oozes out on your back and he exhales roughly.
He lifted the table and you got out of there. The two of you stare at each other for a few moments before Toji lifts your body onto the bed.
***
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Toji lifted your body and now you were sitting on his muscular thighs. You didn't even notice that your vaginal fluid was leaking out again.
"You really lust after my body huh? Tsk, I have to tell our kids that they exist because their mom lusts," Toji taunts.
You suddenly hit Toji's broad shoulders. "Don't say anything weird when we have kids!"
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Dirty [Nanami Kento x Reader]
You peeked at Kento who was struggling with his work in the office. Damn, even on his day off the man is still trying to get his work done.
You lean your body against the wall and wonder what you should do. You were already so bored that Kento had been working since noon and now it was seven o'clock in the evening.
"Kento, don't you want to take a shower first?" you ask. You decide to go inside his office and sit on the sofa.
Kento shook his head. "I'll do it later, I've got a bit more work to do."
Your facial expression immediately turns into a frown. "Why are you such a workaholic? I know your salary won't increase if you work at home like this."
You should know that Kento wouldn't do anything to make you regret this marriage. In a way, he's the best of the best.
Kento never yelled at you even when he was angry. He also still helps you with household chores since you both work.
But at times like this, sometimes there's a twinge of regret in your heart. Is he more concerned about his job than you?
"You don't want to eat too? I already cooked for you," you say in a small voice.
The enthusiasm immediately left your body when Kento shook his head. Annoyed, you broke down the door to Kento's office and rushed to the kitchen.
You wrapped the food you had cooked because you knew Kento wouldn't eat your food. If he was focused on his work, he would ignore everything.
Your feet stepped into the apartment right in front of yours and you quickly knocked on the door. You half expected Megumi to open the door, but it was Toji who did.
"'Hey (name). Want to give me some more food?" Toji asks ignorantly when he sees the food wrapper.
You gave a small nod. " I cooked too much. Will you give Megumi some too?"
The dark-haired man accepted happily and then chuckled. "If it's like this, you'll be Megumi's mama in no time."
Your eyes immediately rounded when you heard that. You don't actually know what happened between Toji and Megumi's mom, but it seems they got divorced.
"Who came dad?"
Both of your eyes fall on Megumi who is wearing his headphones. His face immediately looks happy when he sees your face.
"(Name)? Did you give me more food?" asks Megumi with a happy look. The teenager snatched the food wrapper from his father's hand.
"You seem really happy, don't you? I'll cook for you too sometime," you said happily. At least someone would appreciate the food you had cooked.
"Yes. Dad's food is really bad," Megumi taunts and Toji just rolls his eyes.
You laughed and nodded. "Then I'll go back first, okay?"
You head back to your apartment and exhale softly. You don't even realize that Kento has been watching your movements since before.
"Did you give them our food?" Kento asked quietly, but you knew he was holding back his anger.
You shrugged your shoulders. "Usually if you refuse to eat in the afternoon, you won't eat until the next morning. Pity the food gets spoiled."
Kento exhaled his breath. "At least ask me first, I don't know what to cook right now."
"Just cook instant noodles," you reply nonchalantly.
He immediately pulled you into his arms and kissed your forehead. "I'm sorry, okay? I should have realized the time. But now I want to eat, there's no food."
"Just eat me," you say.
Kento rounded his eyes and smiled a little. He takes you to his study while playing with his finger inside you.
Your pussy juices seep out as soon as you feel his finger enter. Kento's finger is big and long, so it feels very suffocating when he inserts it in yours.
You close your eyes and begin to sigh softly. Your head rests on your husband's broad shoulder. Kento took off your pants and inserted his penis slowly.
"AHH~!" you sigh.
The penis that had already left its possession inside yours now stopped moving when it entered yours. You opened your eyes and looked at Kento in confusion.
The man grinned. "This is your punishment for giving food to our neighbors without asking me first. I want to do a little more work on this, okay, honey?"
You looked at him with watery eyes but you ended up following his wishes. It's so annoying when a man is able to hold back his lust.
You closed your eyes and you could hear Kento's typing fingers. Did he wash his hands first? You just hope that none of your vaginal fluid remains on Kento's fingers.
Five minutes seemed very long, you tried to move your hips but you were surprised when Kento held your waist to stop your movement.
"Don't move it yet, okay? I have very few things to do. My wife has a lot of patience, hm?" Kento asked while kissing your forehead.
Crazy, crazy, crazy! If you've heard it said that it's usually the husband who's impatient for sex, you feel the opposite.
Actually, you're the one who often asks for sex first. In the one year of your marriage, Kento very rarely asks first.
You can feel all the veins on his penis scratching your pussy. Ah... Looks like you didn't choose the wrong husband.
"How come your pussy keeps twitching?" Kento teases.
You gave him an annoyed look and bit his shoulder. He laughed and immediately shut down his laptop and lifted your body to the room.
"Nghh.. thrust.. want to be thrust.." you begged.
Kento looks at you lustfully and immediately thrusts his hips as deep as he can. You immediately sigh loudly when you feel his penis crashing into your womb.
"Isn't it good baby? I'm the only one who can make you fall apart like this."
You nodded. "Yessss.. only Kento-hh..." you sigh.
Your husband smiled and lowered his body to suck your nipple. You felt the pleasure, especially since your nipples are one of the sensitive spots on your body.
Even though Kento is sucking your nipples, his hips don't lose their rhythm. You feel dizzy from the pounding of his big dick.
"Your pussy is really good, baby, don't get too tight NGHHHH!" moaned Kento.
You kissed Kento's lips for a while. Kento's game is really good. Even if you were both virgins when you got married, you are sure that no other man can satisfy you like Kento.
"Ngh- Ngh! I'm about to cum!" you squeal.
Kento who heard that immediately accelerated his pounding. He also feels the same pleasure as your pussy continues to close up as it is about to orgasm. You can also feel his penis about to cum.
"AHHHH!" you both moaned together.
Your body trembled as you felt the sperm that Kento released inside your womb. He kissed your lips softly and stroked your hair lovingly.
"Go to sleep first, okay, baby? I want to cook instant noodles first."
#fanfic#jujutsu kaisen#methimlastnight#jjk nanami#nanami smut#nanami x you#nanami x reader#reader#neglect
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Keeping Tabs [Geto Suguru x Reader]
Your eyes stare at your cell phone which is browsing on one of the social media. Even after several months, you still can't forget Suguru. You exhaled roughly and ruffled your own hair.
"How come it's so hard for me to forget him?" you asked while looking at Utahime.
She just shrugged her shoulders. "I wouldn't be able to move on from my ex either if I stalked his social media every day."
"Son of a bitch," you cursed and you buried your face in your pillow.
Your gaze shifted out the window. The relationship you had with Geto was very short, only two months. The thing is, he was able to conquer your heart in such a short time.
"If you ask me, I'd rather you go out with Shoko and Mei. Those two are asking us to join the party tonight," Utahime chided.
You know that Utahime is not a person who likes to spend his time having fun in that way. However, you became interested. Who knows, you could find someone who could turn his heart around.
You immediately opened your friend group chat and said that you would be going there soon. You quickly looked at your closet and picked out the clothes you wanted to wear.
"If I wear this, there will be a lot of guys clinging to me, right?" you say casually while chuckling.
"Watch out for Geto there," Utahime says while sipping his drink.
You roll your eyes. "It's good if I meet him there, then I can make him jealous."
You immediately went to Mei Mei's house and the atmosphere was very festive. You momentarily forget all your sadness when Shoko hands you a glass of champagne.
You take a quick sip and start shaking your body. You don't even realize that there's a pair of dark eyes staring at you intently.
A man seemed to keep staring at you and Suguru certainly noticed the intimacy between the two of you. Actually you two weren't making out at all, Suguru just had a different interpretation.
You were of course having a good time with that man, but your happiness was taken away because suddenly Suguru pulled your hand and now he was locking you up in one of the rooms in Mei's house.
"I didn't know you were such a slut, (name)."
Your face turned red when you heard that. "Oh yeah? Then that means you're a gigolo, right? How many girls did you play with when we were dating?"
Suguru rubbed his face and pulled you into your arms. "How many times have I told you that they were just friends?"
"You think I'll believe you? Don't think I don't know that they also gave you a blowjob. What a cheap dick you got," you scold.
Suguru gave you an angry look and quickly pulled you onto the bed. "Okay, I'll show you that only this gigolo can satisfy a cheap slut like you."
Your consciousness that had almost disappeared due to drinking alcohol came back quickly. Your face paled when Suguru found a rope and he immediately tied your hands together at the headboard.
You knew you should have refused, but your body could never forget the pleasure given by Suguru. Even when he took off your panties, he could immediately see your slimy pussy.
"Do you really like being raped?" asked Suguru while licking your pussy. He stabs your pussy with his sharp tongue and you can only sigh.
"Nghh... Suguruhh.." you sigh.
Suguru's shoulder-length hair is already messy and you like that a lot. You bend your legs and force him to deepen his play in your pussy.
The man lifted his head when your pussy was already very wet and tried to put both his fingers in there. Suguru grinned as the slime stuck to your fingers and your pussy.
"I'll always love you. I'll make you have no choice but to marry me, (name)," Suguru says while pounding his dick as deep as he can.
Your eyes widened and your tongue stuck out. It feels so good. It seems Suguru's words were true, only he can satisfy you.
Your gaze turned to Suguru and you could see the look of lust and love in his eyes. It made you think again. If he really loved you, why would he cheat on you with another woman?
"Ever since you asked for a breakup, there was never a day I didn't try to look for you. I always stalk all your social media accounts. I've also been looking for you in front of your apartment," Suguru says.
Your tears involuntarily flowed. "If you really love me that much, why did you cheat on me, Suguru? Am I really not that good for you?"
Suguru rounded his eyes at your tears. "No dear, it's all my fault. Forgive me, okay?"
The man didn't slow down his movements at all even though the two of you were talking. Your eyes shifted to the place where you were joined. You glared when you realized that Suguru wasn't using a condom.
"Sug... you didn't use a condom?" you ask in panic.
Suguru smiled and kissed you gently on the lips. "I'll prove that I can be faithful too, (name). But you won't give me a chance, so the only way is to get you pregnant."
Your face immediately turns pale. You knew your ex was insane, but you didn't think he would do that just to tie you down.
"I can get an abortion if you really get me pregnant, Suguru," you said with a sharp glare.
Your ex chuckled. "Oh yeah? Who told me that she wanted to have a child as soon as possible? Besides, I've been recording our lovemaking from the beginning."
Your heart felt like it was going to burst out of your chest when you saw Suguru's cell phone that recorded the whole lovemaking. The man smiled with satisfaction when he saw your resignation.
"AH-! Nghhh..."
"Isn't it good honey? How many times have I told you that only I can satisfy you," Suguru said while leaving a mark on your neck.
It felt like you were about to fly to the seventh heaven. Suguru does know where your body's weak points are. Not to mention the size of his penis, which is incredible. You know that you'll have to give in to the pleasure.
You know Suguru will come when you feel his engorged penis. Your face turns red and you both squeal when Suguru ejaculates his sperm inside your womb.
You orgasmed as soon as his sperm entered your womb. Your juices spurted out and hit Suguru's thighs, but he licked your pussy without caring about the sperm that started coming out.
"Pregnant with my child, okay? If you don't want to, I'll share the video. I'm sure we can be good parents," Suguru said as he kissed your forehead.
You said nothing, knowing you had no choice. Well, maybe you should follow that man's plot first before conquering him.
***
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Suguru brought your bodies to the bathtub filled with warm water and leaned your body on his. Of course, in that position you can feel his erect penis.
"You... still lust after me even though I'm pregnant like this?" you said while looking at Suguru sharply.
The man raised both his hands. "You're even more sexy now that you're pregnant. You're carrying our child in your womb."
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Control [Gojo Satoru x Fem! Reader]
You know that your lover is a naughty person, very naughty. He likes to tease you and get on your nerves. Of course, your temper is constantly being tested by Satoru.
Now, your boyfriend continues to pester you while you're using your skincare. He deliberately returns the items you've picked up to their places so that you have to get up to get them all back.
"Hehehe..."
Satoru's laughter sounds so annoying, but you can only roll your eyes. You don't have the energy to reply to your lover, but it seems Satoru isn't satisfied with that.
He takes your phone and holds it up high. "You're so focused. Kiss me first, then I'll give you back your phone."
You know you're not going to win against Satoru. Even though you were above average height, Satoru was also above average height. You sighed roughly and kissed him briefly on the cheek.
You immediately thrust out your hand to ask Satoru to return your cell phone. But Satoru is basically a jerk. Instead of returning your phone, he frowns.
"Why did you kiss me on the cheek? I wanted you to kiss here," Satoru said, pointing to his lips.
You ruffle your hair roughly. You knew that Satoru wouldn't stop at the lips. He would ask for more and would make you sigh all night long. But you didn't have the energy to oblige.
"Satoru, I'm really tired right now. Can you not add more burden to my life? Or do you want us to break up?" you say casually.
Satoru immediately rounded his eyes when he heard that. His happy expression immediately turns cold and he quickly returns the phone to you.
"Thanks," you said simply.
You immediately went to your bed and closed your eyes. You didn't even realize that you had just brought out your lover's dark side.
The night passed by very quickly. When you wake up, it feels like you haven't gotten enough sleep. But you were more surprised by your position.
Your hands are tied up and your feet are bound with handcuffs. Your heart skips a beat and your gaze falls on a shirtless man.
Satoru appears to be drinking his coffee and stares at you intently. You knew you were in trouble when you saw his blue eyes.
"S-satoru, why did you tie me up like this?" you asked quietly.
The man chuckles when he hears your words. "How can you say that after what you did yesterday? You know that I don't like those words coming out of your mouth, babe."
Your face immediately pales. Damn, what did you say to her yesterday? You forgot all about your conversation because you were already so sleepy. You bite your lower lip and stare at Satoru with a pleading look.
Satoru doesn't seem to be swayed by your actions at all, so you just sigh softly and try to second-guess your words from yesterday.
"Sorry... I accidentally slipped up yesterday because I was really tired. I'm sorry, okay?" you say softly.
"Hah! From your own words, it seems like you also don't remember what you said yesterday. You should be given a punishment, (name)."
Your pussy involuntarily twitches when you hear those words come out of Satoru's mouth. Wait, how did you get turned on because Satoru was going to give you a punishment?
Satoru then pulls out a pink vibrator. He raises your legs and immediately inserts the vibrator that he's already greased with lubricant.
"What's wrong with your face? Happy to get punished?" mocked Satoru.
You reflexively shake your head. There's no way you're going to admit that! Satoru will mock you to no end once he's back to his normal self.
"So why is it already wet when I haven't entered yet?"
Your eyes are immediately drawn to your pussy. Damn, you yourself don't understand why your pussy can get wet so quickly. You tried to close your eyes so you wouldn't feel embarrassed, but Satoru quickly grabbed your face.
"Look at me, babe. It's a punishment, so you can't enjoy it, right?"
"MMNGHH!!!"
You sigh as soon as Satoru slams the vibrator into your pussy. It feels so good, yet you're a little afraid of what Satoru will do to you.
He unties you all over and dresses you. "Well, now let's go exercise shall we?" said Satoru.
You swallowed and nodded. You had no intention of fighting Satoru's words. You couldn't ignore the nagging feeling in your pussy, but Satoru ignored it.
"Let's go for a little run, shall we?" says Satoru. Just as you're about to nod, he puts his right hand in his pocket and you can feel the vibrator now inside your pussy start to move.
"NGH!" you sigh involuntarily. Several people around you immediately looked at you and your face immediately turned red.
"S-satoru... Don't make it so hard..." you whisper softly.
Satoru tilted his lips. "Who told you to say that yesterday? I'll stop when you realize what you said yesterday."
Damn, damn, damn! How can you know what you said yesterday if your brain is focused on the pleasure in your body right now?
While you were busy thinking, Satoru immediately turned the vibrator's level up to the highest. Your hips immediately twisted in the direction of the vibrator's motion involuntarily.
"NGGH AHHH!" you sigh while biting your lip. You're a little grateful that no one noticed your sigh.
Satoru lowered back down to the lowest level when you were close to orgasm. You look up at him with watery eyes. He just smiles and deliberately squeezes your breasts.
"Ngh~! It feels good~" you say back. You grabbed Satoru's sleeve and buried your face in his muscular arm.
Satoru pulls your hips and kisses your head. "Want to cum?" he asks and you nod.
Your face paled again when Satoru's friend, Geto came over and approached you. Satoru immediately grins and raises it to the highest level again.
"AHH~!" you shout.
Geto instantly notices the two of you and he immediately waves his hand. "Satoru! You're so energetic, already exercising early in the morning."
"Well, we exercise every day. (Name) really likes to exercise late at night," said Satoru with flushed cheeks.
"Hahaha! Be careful if you go too far. It'll be like me and my wife," Geto said.
Satoru rolled his eyes. "That's you deliberately baby trapping your wife, right? I'm not that bad, Sug,"
Geto smiles wryly and sees your gesture. Your hips kept moving and your face turned red. Then you also gripped Satoru's sleeve very tightly.
"I never make my wife use toys in public anyway," he continues.
Your face turns red. Of course Geto would notice. He and Satoru share the same brain cells, so it's no wonder they're both perverts.
"Satthhh! I- AKH! I want to go home," you beg with watery eyes.
Satoru smiled. "Oh? So you realize what you did wrong?"
You nodded. "Ngh- YES! I asked for a breakup yesterday. Y-you don't like it, do you?"
"Good girl," Satoru says, rubbing your head.
Geto closed his mouth to look at the two of you. "You guys go home first, it's really obvious that you're having a hard time."
***
extended version available on patreon. https://msha.ke/whitelunaria
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Now the two of you have arrived at the elevator and you immediately collapse into a squat while lowering your head. Satoru looked at you lustfully.
"What's wrong with you babe? Can't stand it? Be patient. We can have as much sex as we want," Satoru said as he ruffled his own hair.
You stare at your lover with watery eyes. "H-honey... C-can you lower the level? I-I already remember what I did wrong."
Satoru gave you an evil look. "But why would I do that? You realizing your mistake doesn't mean you're sorry, right?"
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You Right [Sukuna x Fem! Reader x Yuuji]
You stare at the man who is now sleeping next to you. His face is so adorable when he sleeps. Slowly your fingers brush away his hair that's blocking his eyes.
Yuuji is handsome, not to mention he has a nice body. But underneath it all, you fell in love with his nature. It's hard to have a boyfriend who is similar to Yuuji.
You unconsciously laughed softly and pulled him into your arms. The two of you did decide to live together during college to save money. But of course you knew your boyfriend's dark secret.
His family passed down an evil spirit that would possess the body of one of the descendants of the Itadori family. Unfortunately, your lover became one of the descendants possessed by the evil spirit, Sukuna.
At first of course you thought it was a joke. But that changed when Yuuji let Sukuna possess his body. He suddenly seemed to turn into a different person because of the tattoos that suddenly appeared on his body.
You still remember your first meeting with Sukuna. No, you will continue to remember it as long as you live.
"(Name), I will take over my body if he does something to you, okay? After this, you can decide whatever you want."
"I won't break up with you, Yuuji. I'm not afraid of Sukuna either. He won't be able to do anything to me," you said.
At that moment, you yourself didn't understand where you got that confidence from. Yuuji nodded and a black tattoo suddenly appeared on his body. You gasped when you saw that.
Yuuji's eyes turned red and you knew that he was Sukuna. You swallowed your saliva and looked at him.
"Damn! This kid finally let me out of there! Who are you?" asked Sukuna.
As you were about to answer, you were surprised when Sukuna looked at you with a surprised and sad look. The creepy aura from earlier suddenly disappeared.
"S-sukuna?" you stammered.
He suddenly approached you and now you were very close. You can even feel his breath on your head.
"W-why are you here?" Sukuna asked back. You could feel the sadness in his voice.
You swallowed and ventured to look at his face. "What do you mean? I'm always here," you replied.
He immediately pulled you into his arms and for some reason you felt something you never felt before.
"(Name)? Why am I hugging you?"
You looked and realized that Yuuji was back.
You woke up and saw an arm wrapped around your waist. You turned your head and saw those red eyes, Sukuna.
"I didn't know that you liked taking Yuuji's body when he was sleeping," you said.
Sukuna chuckled and woke up. "It's the only time when I can spend time alone with you."
Maybe it's because Sukuna uses Yuuji's body, or you're comfortable with it. So you weren't bothered at all when Sukuna put his face on your shoulder.
"You guys must have a lot of sexual intercourse huh?" Sukuna whispered while peeking under your shirt.
You just grimaced when you heard Sukuna's question. You and Yuuji were both virgins when you first started doing it. But because of Yuuji's sports activities, you had to keep up with his strength.
"I know what you guys are doing, I can see everything."
Your face instantly turned red and you looked away. "That has nothing to do with you, does it?"
Sukuna hardened his jaw and bit your shoulder which made you squeal. "Of course it does, because you're my wife."
Sukuna took you into his arms and you could feel your body being pulled. You then looked at the scenery around you and looked at Sukuna in panic.
"Where are we?"
Sukuna sat on a chair that looked like a throne. You kept looking around and realized that it was a typical Japanese house. You became even more surprised when you saw Yuuji there.
"Yuuji!" you call.
Your beloved came straight to you and hugged you. Sukuna just looked at the two of you and smiled wryly. "Aren't you going to explain to your lover how our relationship is, (name)?"
Damn, you hate this. You yourself don't know why you're attracted to Sukuna, but on the other hand you also don't know if you're cheating on her or not. Yuuji and Sukuna have the same body, right?
Yuuji looked at you and smiled a little. "(Name), I already know everything."
You rounded your eyes and unconsciously your tears flowed. "Sorry... I don't understand why I like Sukuna. I never did anything more with him either. H-he's using your body so I can't-"
"I will do everything for you to stay by my side, (name). Even if you share your love with someone else, I won't feel any problem as long as you still love me," Yuuji said while kissing your forehead.
Sukuna immediately pulled your body onto his lap and kissed your neck. You sighed softly and looked at Yuuji. Your lover seemed to swallow his saliva and you could see the bulge in his pants.
"How can you get horny while your lover is being fucked by another man, hm?" said Sukuna.
Now the scene in front of you changes again and you are now in a room. Sukuna slowly undresses you and you are now naked. Yuuji stares at your body as if you were food.
Realizing that your pussy is already very wet, Sukuna immediately strokes his penis. Your eyes immediately rounded up and you moaned.
Yuuji, who wants to take part, sticks the head of his penis into your mouth. Inevitably, you open your mouth and start sucking his penis.
"From then until now, you really like rough sex, don't you, dear?" asked Sukuna.
You just nodded slowly. Your brain is only filled with penis, penis, and penis. You can even feel every side of Sukuna's penis. It turns out that he does have a different penis than Yuuji.
"(Name)... Your face really looks like a slut," Yuuji said with a smirk.
Sukuna chuckled. "I taught him to make that expression, you idiot. You should be grateful that I allowed you to play with her."
Yuuji only smiled. "You should be the one thanking me for allowing you to stay in my body."
Sukuna who heard that rolled his eyeballs and accelerated the movement of his penis inside you. He didn't even realize that you were almost unconscious. No, you didn't faint, it's just that you were already unaware of what they were talking about.
"NGHHHHH!!! AHHHHH!!!" you scream as you reach orgasm.
Your whole body shook and you closed your eyes. You still feel the euphoria of the orgasm until you don't realize that your two lovers still need release.
You seemed to realize when Sukuna moved his penis again. "Nghhh... Slow down...." you beg.
"You must know that there is no such thing as taking it slow for me and Yuuji," Sukuna replied and Yuuji just grinned.
***
extended version available on patreon. https://msha.ke/whitelunaria
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Even interspersed with Yuuji's stomping, you can feel Sukuna's loving gaze. You became curious about what exactly happened between you two back then.
"Nghhh... AHHHH!" moaned Yuuji.
Yuuji's pounding was getting so intense that your head almost hit the wall. You bit your lower lip and looked at Sukuna. The man was not at all bothered by Yuuji suddenly taking his position.
" I'M CUMMINGG!" you screamed loudly.
Your juices immediately gushed out and it made Yuuji have an orgasm. The man's body collapsed on top of you and you kissed his forehead lovingly.
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All Mine [Inumaki Toge x Fem! Reader]
You gently stroke Toge's hair. The man is now resting his head on your thigh. He closed his eyes but you couldn't tell if he was asleep or not.
You unconsciously rubbed the mark on his cheek. Of course you knew what the mark is, and you were used to the words Toge said.
You also knew that there were many people who didn't like your relationship with Toge. They always say that you deserve better.
But you know that's not true. They just don't understand why you fell in love with him. Well, with his personality, it's honestly impossible not to fall in love with him.
It seemed like Toge was really sleeping. He opened his eyes slowly and looked at your face.
You chuckle and pinch his cheek. "Just woke up?" you ask for confirmation and Toge nods.
"Want to eat now?" you ask again.
"Shake."
You get up from your couch and start getting ready to go out. You were a little surprised when Toge suddenly hugged you from behind.
You look away and stare at your boyfriend. "Why baby?"
Toge just shook his head, but you could tell that something was bothering him. But he won't speak even if you force him to.
So you let him and the two of you walked to a fast food restaurant close to your apartment.
You ordered the food you wanted and asked Toge. "Which one do you want?"
Toge pointed to a menu and you immediately ordered it. The two of you sit by the window and you watch the people passing by.
Toge plays with his cell phone and you do the same. But suddenly a man approaches you.
"(Name)?"
You turn your head and see a man you recognize. He is the one who always chased after you when you were in middle school.
"Ah... Kenji huh?" you ask.
Kenji smiled. "You're getting prettier, aren't you? Who is this?" Kenji asks while pointing at Toge.
Of course you know that what he's doing is very rude, but you don't want to make a scene in a public place.
"This is my boyfriend," you reply firmly, ignoring his words that you're pretty.
Kenji looked Toge up and down. "What's with the style? Is it really necessary to cover his mouth with a shirt?"
You exhale. "Kenji, I don't accept all this disrespectful treatment from you. If you don't have anything nice to say, please leave."
The man doesn't seem to give up and you look at Toge. You could tell he was holding his temper, and you were doing the same.
"What's your name? I'm Kenji," he said, extending his hand.
Toge just returned his hand without answering his words. Kenji raised one eyebrow. "Don't tell me your boyfriend is mute?"
"No! It's just that he's not allowed to talk much," you reply.
Kenji's laughter boomed throughout the room. "What's the difference with mute? Tsk, it's a pity that a girl as beautiful as you has to date a mute. If you're tired of him, you can call me."
The man returned to his seat as if nothing had happened. You can only gape at his behavior.
You looked at Toge and he just bowed his head. You bite your lower lip and try to enjoy the food served.
Damn, is this why Toge has been a little different lately? Yes, you're sure that this is the reason.
The two of you returned to the apartment after forcing yourselves to finish the food you ordered. After all, who has the appetite for food after being treated like that?
You closed the apartment door and looked at Toge who went straight to the room. You walked slowly and saw him with his back to you.
"Toge... don't listen to his words, okay? I just want to be with you," you said softly.
Toge turned his body and looked at your face intently. He then held your face with both hands and immediately kissed you.
You closed your eyes and squeezed Toge's shirt. You're not good with words, so you let him do whatever he wants.
"Take off your shirt."
Your body instantly stiffens when you hear his words and you automatically do as he says.
You take off your shirt, pants, and then your underwear. Now you have nothing on and you can see Toge's lust-filled eyes.
"Lie down on the bed."
You walk to the bed and lie down. Toge stood over you topless. You swallow your saliva at the sight.
Toge kisses your lips again and licks your ear. You shudder when he leaves many reddish marks on your neck.
"Ngghhh- Togehhh!"
"Shut up."
Your mouth seems to be covered by duct tape. You wanted to speak but because of Toge, you couldn't utter a single word.
In the end, you could only let out a sigh while twisting your body. Damn, it looks like your lover is intent on torturing you.
"Beautiful..."
You close your eyes and sigh when Toge starts sucking on your nipples. The man also didn't forget to leave a mark there as if claiming you as his own.
The man goes downstairs and now he is facing your pussy. You can feel your wet pussy as you feel Toge's breath there.
The man chuckles and looks at you. "Naughty."
He immediately licked your pussy very skillfully. For some reason you remember when you had sex for the first time.
Both of you were still virgins, so you were still very bad at satisfying your partner.
Two years passed and Toge seemed to be a different person. You didn't expect him to be so lustful.
Toge uses his thumb to play with your clit and his tongue to lick your pussy.
"Nghhhhh! Nghhhh!"
You desperately want to speak, but since Toge is much stronger than you, he is able to control you for a long time.
The man was getting more and more brutal. He accelerated his movements and you could feel your pussy leaking juices non-stop.
"NGGHHH- AHHHHH!"
You finally break free from Toge's technique and your body shakes violently. Your eyes widen upwards and you can't see anything.
Toge was looking at you as if he was looking at a work of art he had created. He loves how messy you look.
The man hardens his jaw again when he remembers your conversation with Kenji. He knows that there are many men who look down on him as your boyfriend, but he doesn't want to give up either.
Toge opened the drawer and saw several boxes of condoms that he always kept ready. He picked one up and immediately put the condom on his penis.
His eyes looked at you lustfully and you knew that you would feel the pleasure he was giving you.
"Open your legs."
***
extended version available on patreon. https://msha.ke/whitelunaria
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Toge watches as your body continues to convulse as you continue to have non-stop orgasms. But Toge had no intention of stopping the curse.
He wipes away the tears and gently kisses your forehead. Your orgasm finally stops and you begin to feel something strange.
"Toge... The condom leaked, didn't it?" you ask weakly.
Toge rounds his eyes and immediately takes out his penis. Sure enough, perhaps because his movements were too rough, the condom tore.
#methimlastnight#jujutsu kaisen#fanfic#inumaki x y/n#inumaki x reader#jjk smut#feeling insecure#breeding
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Truth [Fushiguro Megumi x Fem! Reader]
TW : Dubious Consent
You look at some of the students who are starting to leave the school. It looks like you should go home too. You quickly grab your bag and walk home.
But you gasped when someone held your hand. You turned around and saw someone you recognized.
"Fushiguro Megumi?" you ask.
The man gave you a glare. You feel uncomfortable trying to shake off his hand, but it seems like he has no intention of letting you go.
"What's wrong with you?" you say irritably.
Megumi took out his cell phone and showed you a video. Your face pales when you see who's in the video.
"I didn't realize that there are students who like to have sex with older men."
It feels like you'd rather die on the spot than face Megumi. You bite your lip so hard that you don't realize it's bleeding.
Megumi's finger held your lips and looked at you gently. "Don't bite your lip again, it's already bleeding."
"So what do you want to do with the video?" you ask again.
You always managed to hide the fact that you liked having sex with much older men.
One day you met a man named Toji and you felt that he was the perfect match for you.
You guys always did it at Toji's house, but you didn't expect Megumi to get a hold of that video.
"I don't know yet, but I think this will be good for me," Megumi grins.
Your heart was beating so fast. "W-why were you able to get that video?"
Megumi taps her fingers on his phone. "Well... because I'm the son of the man you had sex with?"
Your face pales when you hear that. You feel like killing yourself right now. How could you let your guard down?
"M-megumi, please don't spread that video. I promise I'll do whatever you want!" you beg.
The corners of Megumi's lips immediately rise when she hears your words. "Anything?" she asked in confirmation.
You nodded vigorously. You threw away all your pride just to protect your future.
Especially now that you're still a student. One scandal and your future would be ruined for the rest of your life.
The man's hand then pulled yours and the two of you walked. You didn't even dare to question where he was taking you.
You then recognize a house that you once stayed in. The house where you had sex with Megumi's father.
The man let go of your hand and motioned for you to sit on the sofa. You just obeyed his wishes.
"You said yourself that you would do anything. You can't take back your word."
Megumi removes your uniform slowly and stares at the bra you're wearing. Your breath hitched when you noticed what Megumi was doing.
The man's hands unhooked your bra and inhaled softly. You become embarrassed by what you're doing with Megumi.
But the man ignores your reaction. He starts to leave marks on your breasts and sucks your nipples slowly.
"NGHH~!"
You admit that Megumi is not as skillful as her father, but of course his actions can make you moan. You unconsciously point your finger at your own pussy.
Megumi pulled your wrist roughly. "Who allowed you to touch your own body?"
You bit your lip and looked up at Megumi with pleading eyes. The man chuckled and inserted two fingers slowly.
You jerk your head up as Megumi starts to play with her fingers. Damn, why does this man satisfy you so quickly?
You can feel all of Megumi's fingers. It looks like this man is a photocopy of her father. With big fingers like that, you know Megumi can satisfy any woman.
Your eyes start to close when you're about to have an orgasm. Megumi moves his finger very roughly and touches your sweet spot.
"NGHHH- AHHHH!!!"
You were completely unconcerned with your surroundings as you orgasmed. You don't even care if Toji has come home and is now looking at the two of you.
"Dad," Megumi says with a flat face.
You immediately round your eyes and turn your head. Your eyes see a man who has always been your favorite lately, Toji.
Toji grinned. "So can you explain why you decided to take father's woman?"
"Well, I like her and I also have that. You don't want to go to jail for having sexual intercourse with a schoolgirl, do you?"
Toji raised both hands. "Alright. (Name), I'm sorry that I couldn't save you. This is also about our reputation, right?"
You just stare at Toji with an incredulous look. You thought that Toji could defeat Megumi. But it looks like the evidence Megumi got is really going to make you both fall into the abyss.
The man just smiled and closed the door to his room. Megumi smiles when she sees your desperate face.
"There's no one who can save you but me, (name)."
He unzipped his pants and held up his erect penis. He presses the head of his penis to your lips and you can't help but open your mouth.
Megumi's hands grab your hair and start forcing your head forward. You choke but Megumi doesn't care about that.
You're trying your best not to choke. It wouldn't be funny if you died from choking on a penis, right?
"I thought you were good at this, but it turns out you're really bad," Megumi taunts.
You gave Megumi a sharp look but you continued to suck. Megumi's penis isn't as big as Toji's, but Megumi treats you roughly.
"Nghhhh... It's really good. Do you want to suck my penis anywhere?"
You were about to shake your head but Megumi held your face with both hands. He moans and you can feel something warm in your mouth.
"Clean it up and swallow it all," Megumi ordered.
You have no choice but to do whatever Megumi wants. You frown as you swallow Megumi's cum.
Megumi lifts your body and opens the door to her room. You unconsciously look around Megumi's room.
But it's all gone when Megumi rubs his cock against your already wet pussy. You look up at him with a pleading gaze and it makes Megumi smile.
"Say what?"
"Put your dick in here... I'm already so wet..." you beg with watery eyes.
Megumi inserts his penis in one stroke and it makes you scream. "NGHHH- AHHHH!!!"
" Louder, baby. Louder so my dad can hear, right?"
"Nghhhhh~!"
Megumi began to move his body violently. Sweat started pouring from both of your bodies.
"G-good...!" you say.
Megumi runs his fingers through his hair and looks at you intently. "Why did you choose my father anyway? I have a more promising future than him."
The man accelerated his movements. "I'm... nghhh... going out..." he said.
"AHHHH!"
You scream again as Megumi thrusts his hips making his penis hit your womb.
Both of you orgasmed simultaneously. Your body shakes violently from the multiple orgasms. You're sure you won't be able to walk tomorrow.
"(Name)," Megumi calls.
You just turn your head and are slightly surprised when you see Megumi's gaze. He sinks his face into your shoulder.
"Don't leave me, okay? I recorded our activities earlier, so you have no choice but to obey me, hm?"
***
extended version available on patreon (https://msha.ke/whitelunaria).
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Your eyes gaze calmly at Megumi. The day you've been waiting for has finally arrived. Your gaze traveled to Megumi's lips and you kissed him.
The man is surprised but he kisses you back. You guys do that for a while and you know that your lust is rising.
You reach for Megumi's pants and try to unzip them. Of course that makes him look at you expectantly.
"(Name)... Are you sure you want to do this? You just woke up, didn't you?"
You don't care. Maybe because you're going to have your period soon, your lust is getting the better of you. You don't answer him and just focus on opening his pants.
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Desperate [Ryomen Sukuna x Fem! Reader]
You stare at the couples spending their time on the beach. At times like this you feel that you are the only one who is alone.
Sometimes you wonder how people can get a partner so quickly. You've done everything you can, but luck just isn't on your side.
You bite your lip and stare at the setting sun. Maybe it's time for you to go home.
Along the way you only see the pink sky. You never stopped loving that kind of scenery.
At the age of almost thirty, of course there are people who have asked whether you have a boyfriend or not.
You would usually just answer randomly and change the topic. Of course you would never want to say if none of your relationships have worked out.
You arrive home when it's dark. You cleaned yourself up and laid down on your bed.
Looking at the scene, you feel even more desperate. You got up and sat on a chair and picked up a paper.
" Should I call the incubus using this method?" you ask.
You follow the pattern you saw on your phone and place it on your desk. Your hand lights the candle and you begin to close your eyes.
You wait for a minute and the timer on your phone rings. You open your eyes and look around, there is no one.
"What am I hoping for like this anyway? It looks so desperate," you chuckle sadly.
Your body then stiffens when you feel a hand grabbing your shoulder. You were too scared to turn your head.
"Why did you call me?"
You swallow your saliva. What should you say? You can't possibly say that you called him just because you need someone's affection right?
"I think I made a mistake," you said hesitantly.
The hand flips you over and you let out a small squeal when you see the incubus's form. He has four eyes and four arms. He was also very tall and that scared you.
"You wouldn't just call me that if you really made a mistake."
You sighed harshly. "Okay, I'm calling you because I'm a woman who hasn't been in a relationship for the past ten years and I'm in desperate need of someone's affection."
The demon smiled and grabbed your chin, forcing you to look at his face. "I can give you that affection you want."
Your eyes close when one of his hands brushes your lips and starts kissing your lips. Damn, you love this feeling so much.
"Don't be afraid, you'll see why I have four hands," he said.
Your heart was beating fast when the incubus laid you down on the bed. You stare at his muscular body.
"What's your name?" you asked in a small voice.
"Sukuna."
You chanted the name on your lips and you liked it. Sukuna undressed you slowly and played with both your nipples with his hands.
You sighed softly and were about to hold Sukuna's face, but one of her hands immediately restrained your hand.
Your face turns red when her fourth hand now moves to your pussy. You squealed when he inserted his finger inside your vagina.
"Ahhh... Nghhh~!"
You who got stimulated all at once in your intimate area felt overwhelmed. You've never felt this before.
Sukuna's finger was very thick and large. With a height of more than two meters, it is only natural that he has large hand size.
Sukuna just stares at you with a lustful gaze. You didn't even resist at all even though he treated you a little roughly.
"AHHH!"
You screamed when you got your release. Your vision became blurry and your body trembled.
"Isn't it good?" asked Sukuna and you nodded weakly.
He took off his pants and revealed his erect penis. You can only gape at the sight.
"Y-you have two penises?" you ask stiffly.
Sukuna chuckled and ruffled your hair. "I won't put them in at once. But you must have the strength to satisfy both of them."
Your heart beats fast when Sukuna says that. The man then slides one of his penises into your vagina and strokes it.
Your body trembles violently when you feel his dick inside your pussy. You can even see the bulge in your stomach.
Sukuna is still trapping your hand with his. His other two hands played with your nipples and sucked them. Then his last hand played with your clitoris.
"Su-ku... na..." you sigh.
The man doesn't listen to your words and keeps pounding his dick deep.
Realizing that the man is not using any protection starts to awaken your consciousness.
"Una... Don't come inside..." you say softly.
Sukuna kissed your forehead and wiped away your sweat. "Incubus sperm can't make a human pregnant, just relax."
You decided to believe that and screamed when you felt the sperm flowing in your womb.
"AHHHHH UNAAA!!!" you screech.
"NGHH AHHH!" groaned Sukuna.
Sukuna kisses your lips and you still feel the orgasm that hit you. You close your eyes for a moment and catch your breath.
You close your eyes again when Sukuna inserts his other penis. The man smiled at your reaction.
"I told you to prepare your energy, right?"
"Unahh... don't!" you squeal.
You held back your sigh when Sukuna started moving her hips. Your eyes can only open and close when feeling pleasure.
"You will definitely never feel this with another man," said Sukuna.
"Ngghh-!"
You stare at Sukuna and your heart beats very loudly. If you look around, Sukuna is indeed handsome despite his creepy form.
Sukuna continued to moan as he stomped his hips. "You... huh... why so tight? Don't tell me you're still a virgin?"
You turned your face away in embarrassment. The only thing that satisfies you is the sex toys you bought.
"Heh, I must not have been that bad in my previous life to be able to get a virgin girl like you."
"Hah.. hah.."
Sukuna licks his lips and you squeal when you feel your nipples being sucked. Sukuna removes his hand and you stare at him in horror.
"Why... is there a mouth on your hand?"
"I don't know, maybe because I can do it?"
"Nghhh ahhh!!!" you screamed again.
All the hot spots on your body were being played with and you couldn't escape because Sukuna had you trapped underneath him.
It feels like you're going crazy, but on the one hand you know you'll never feel sensations like this again.
"Get it out, baby. Get it all out."
Your body can no longer contain all that pleasure. You reach orgasm and you can feel the liquid coming out of your sex organs.
Your body and legs shook violently. Your eyes widened upwards and your vision darkened.
At the same time, Sukuna also orgasmed and again released all his sperm inside her body. He moaned and lay down next to you and hugged you. His embrace feels very warm.
You started to get sleepy and closed your eyes. But you can hear the words Sukuna said very clearly.
"I love you, (name)."
***
extended version available on patreon (https://msha.ke/whitelunaria)
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"You're even more beautiful after getting pregnant. Looks like our child really had a positive impact on you, huh?"
You laughed and rubbed your stomach. "Yes. He is a blessing in my life."
The man looked at you for a while and started playing his game. Two of his hands held your body and his other two hands played with your breasts.
"NGHHH~! Don't hold them too hard!" you squeal.
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Step Brother [Kamo Choso x Fem! Reader]
Your eyes stare at your brother, ah more precisely your stepbrother. He has quite a strange appearance and it sometimes makes you grimace.
Choso is his name. The man's appearance is practically a mess. His hair was long for a boy, not to mention his style of clothing.
"Mom and Dad will leave now," your stepfather says.
You just nodded casually and went back to eating your breakfast. You could tell that your relationship with Choso wasn't very good.
Your mom just smiled and closed the door. Things got quieter and you honestly didn't like this.
You finished your breakfast as fast as you could to avoid Choso. Of course it doesn't escape his notice.
"(Name)," Choso called out.
You bit your lower lip and hoped that your stepbrother would just remind you of your homework.
"Why brother?" you asked softly.
The man pushed his cereal bowl away and looked at you. "It's been three months since mom and dad got married, but it feels like you're still cold to me."
You laugh stiffly. "Just your feelings maybe?"
"Not really. I know exactly how you feel. Did you forget that we were friends when we were in kindergarten?"
You still remember that memory, of course, but at the same time you wish you could forget it.
How could you possibly confess to Choso if he was your first love. What with your current status, it was taboo.
Choso walked up to you and gave you a sharp look. "Don't lie, I know you still have that playground picture."
You exhaled and rolled your eyes. It seemed like the man had seen the things you brought when you moved here.
"So what, nothing will change if I remember you, right?" you asked back.
Choso chuckled and smiled a little. "So you're pretending to forget your memory? I'm a little disappointed."
You furrow your brow. "That's too much," you reply.
You were about to go back to your room before Choso's hand grabbed your wrist. He pulled you up and you were now sitting on his thigh.
Your face turns red when you see your position. You tried to stand up but you had to admit that you couldn't beat a man's strength.
"What do you really want?" you ask irritably.
"I want you."
You rounded your eyes at Choso's answer. But the man's expression looks as if he's in a lot of hurt and it makes you feel bad.
Your hand holds his jaw gently. "Choso... Did you know that you were my first love?"
Now it's Choso's turn to be surprised. "S-seriously? How come you never told me?"
"Well, how could I tell you, we went to different elementary schools, junior high and high school. Also, that's in the past," you reply casually.
Choso didn't like your answer. "I love you... I always love you. No other girl will ever take your place in my heart."
You feel several emotions churning violently in your heart. Why... why is this man only expressing his feelings now?
"If you had said this before our parents got married, I would gladly accept it," you say.
Choso's smile disappears as soon as he hears your answer. He pulled your neck and immediately kissed you on the lips.
Of course you were surprised, but your heart ached when you saw Choso crying. Does this man love you so much that he reacts like that?
You slowly kissed Choso back. You run your hand through his shoulder-length hair, which feels so soft.
He then broke the kiss and looked into your eyes. "Can I call you mine?"
You nodded hesitantly and Choso lifted you to his room. This was the first time you went to Choso's room.
Choso's room is dominated by black and gray, but you like it. Your attention returned to Choso's flushed face.
You just realized that Choso hadn't put on his clothes since earlier. You were too busy with your own feelings to notice that.
Your hand went to Choso's stomach and felt his muscles. He smiled wryly and took your hand.
"If you want to hold it, just say it, okay?" he said softly.
His words manage to make your face blush. You could feel the sexual tension between the two of you, now that you were home alone.
You unconsciously direct Choso's hand to squeeze your boobs. As a human with lust, of course Choso couldn't resist.
He takes off your pajamas and looks at your boobs. You don't regret not wearing your bra while at home.
Choso starts squeezing your boobs and playing with your nipples. You just sigh and run your fingers down your body.
"Ahhhh... nghhhh...!" you moan.
The man seems to realize where your hand is and he quickly pulls down your pants. Now Choso's fingers take over the job your fingers were doing.
Choso's finger certainly feels different. It feels thicker and longer, you can't help but roll your eyes when it hits your sensitive spot.
After feeling that your pussy is wet enough, Choso takes out his penis and you hold your breath.
"I'm taking it slow, okay?" asks Choso and you nod.
You almost orgasm when only the head of his penis enters, but when all of his penis has entered, it feels really good.
"Your cock is so... good..." you sigh.
Choso let out a small moan and kissed your forehead. "Your pussy is really good too... ahh...!"
The man moves his hips at a normal pace, but still manages to make you feel good.
"Ahh.. ahh.. nghhhh!!! What if... we... get... caught...?" you ask stammeringly.
"They can't do anything baby, from the start they all know that I love you since we were children."
The creaking sound of the bed did not bother Choso to slow down his movements. His eyes were only focused on his mouth which continued to emit sighs.
Your eyes gazed at Choso's messy face. The man's hair is tied up improperly but it makes you even more lustful.
"I'm cumming inside, okay?" asks Choso.
You look at him doubtfully. "What.. if I get preg..nant?"
Choso shakes his head. "I bought you morning after pills. It's not your fertile period, right?"
"Yes..." you said softly.
He just smiled and kissed your lips. You feel like you're going to be swept away in Choso's arms every time he kisses you.
Choso can feel your vagina tightening, a sign that you're about to have an orgasm.
That makes Choso speed up his movements without caring about you who are already in the seventh heaven.
"I'm cumming! AHHHHH!!!" cried Choso.
"Ahhhh! Nghhhhh~!" you sigh.
You can feel Choso's cum starting to come out of your pussy. You hold his face and smile a little.
"I love you, Choso. I don't care what other people think. I will love you forever."
He smoothed your hair and looked at you with a very gentle gaze. "I love you too, sweetheart. Tell everyone that you're mine, yeah?"
You just chuckled and Choso lay down next to you. Your energy was exhausted, and you decided to sleep after the hot activities.
***
extended version available on patreon (https://msha.ke/whitelunaria).
preview extended version :
You don't protest despite Choso's rough movements. The pleasure you get is doubled because of his rough movements.
"Ah! Ah!! What if our parents find out that I'm pushing you like this?" asked Choso.
You naturally feel scared. "Bro-ther!!! Ahh! Let's move to ano-ther room!" you pleaded.
Choso grinned. "Why, dear? Let our parents... ahh! know that their children are doing depraved deeds here."
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Escapism [Megumi x Fem! Reader x Yuuji]
I find myself in this shit position. The man that I love sat me down last night, and he told me that it's over, dumb decision.
You wipe your tears that don't stop flowing. You don't know what you did wrong that made your ex throw you away.
You always tried to be the best. You cut your hair, changed your dressing style, went on a diet, and all the things to keep him with you.
But it seems like you had different ideas from the start. No matter how hard you try to hold on, the relationship is doomed.
Your feet step into a club that you used to visit before your ex forbade you. You miss that atmosphere.
And I don't wanna feel how my heart is rippin, in fact I don't wanna feel so I stick to sippin.
You order a drink and down it quickly. You're sure that no one will care about your current state.
You don't want to feel the pain in your heart. No, you don't want to feel anything so you take a quick sip of your drink.
Just a heart broke bitch, six inch heels, in the back of the nightclub sipping champagne.
You close your eyes and internalize the song in your heart. How could there be a song that fits your current situation so well.
Drunk calls, drunk texts, drunk tears, drunk sex, I was looking for a man who's on the same page.
Your eyes unconsciously shift to the two men who seem to be staring at you. You pause for a moment.
You admit that they are handsome. The man on the left had pink hair and the man on the right had black hair.
Your gaze drops down and you realize that they have amazing bodies. Are theirs big too?
You rounded your eyes and immediately gave a small shake. How could you think that when you didn't even know them.
You were too wrapped up in your thoughts to notice if they started walking and sat next to you.
"Why are you alone?" asked the man with pink hair.
You shrug your shoulders. "Just broke up."
You didn't realize that both of them grinned when they heard your answer. You took another sip of your drink and felt your throat burning.
"What's your name pretty? Call me Megumi."
"Call me Yuuji!" Yuuji squeals excitedly.
A smile begins to break out on your face. "I'm (name). Do you guys come here often?"
"Not that often. How about you?" asked Megumi.
"I used to come here quite often. But my ex told me not to, so I haven't been here lately," you say.
Yuuji put his arm around your shoulder. "Don't mind your ex. He must be an old-fashioned guy who thinks clubs are bad places."
"But that's the truth," Megumi replies and you laugh loudly.
Both men are stunned to see you. They feel happy that they were able to put you in a good mood.
You talk and you unconsciously tell them how you broke up with your ex. Yuuji and Megumi look annoyed by your story and they respond very well to your story.
I don't wanna feel, I don't wanna feel how I did last night.
You don't know how many glasses you've finished and now you can feel your head getting very dizzy. You were about to stand up from your chair when you stumbled.
Yuuji grabbed your waist and pulled you up. "Are you okay? Shall we take you home?"
You just nodded randomly and Yuuji immediately carried your body. Megumi immediately drove the car and you guys drove off.
"Where's your house?" Megumi asked.
"Huh? I don't know..." you replied absentmindedly.
Yuuji looked at you who was starting to close his eyes. " She's already drunk. Shall we take her home first?"
"Yes. I don't know where to take her either," Megumi said.
The man drove the car and now the three of you had arrived at Megumi's house. Yuuji quickly got out of the car and carried your body to the guest room.
"It's a good thing that my father is out of town, otherwise I would have been chopped up by Toji," Megumi commented.
"How can you call your own father by name?" asked Yuuji while shaking his head.
Yuuji was surprised when he felt a hand hugging his body from behind. He then realized that it was you.
"Are you awake?" asked Yuuji softly.
You nodded slowly. "My body... how come it feels hot?"
Megumi rounded his eyes and immediately ran to the guest room. He then realized that you drank the forbidden water.
"Bastard! How could Toji not throw this drink away yet!" cursed Megumi.
Yuuji gave him a confused look. "What the hell was that drink?"
"It's normal water, just mixed with some stimulant by Toji. Maybe (name) thinks it's okay because it's sealed."
Megumi knew that her father often gave it to a woman he liked. Megumi also knew that her father would put up a sealed lid so that no one would find out about his foul plans.
"So what now?" asked Yuuji.
Megumi bit her lower lip. "Either we have sex or tell (name) to take a cold shower."
Not twenty-four hours since my ex did dead it, I got a new man, it's about to get sweaty.
Yuuji was surprised when you suddenly sat on the floor and looked at him with a pleading gaze. "Yuuji, Megumi, let's have some fun, shall we?"
The two boys looked at each other and exhaled their breath. "I can't say no to that either, Mi."
"Yeah, the same as you," asked Megumi indignantly.
"Don't regret it," Yuuji said as he pulled your body onto the bed. He took off your shirt slowly and stared at the bra you were wearing.
Megumi took off your pants and noticed that you were wearing matching underwear. "I'm getting suspicious that she's planning this."
Yuuji took off your bra and Megumi took off your panties. You were now completely naked and it made the two men even more horny.
Megumi inserted her finger into your pussy and then took it out. "Crazy, it's so wet here, so why don't we just go straight in?"
Yuuji nodded and Megumi immediately inserted his penis into your vagina. You both sighed and Yuuji played with your breasts.
"Feels good..." you say.
Megumi looks at your sweaty body. "Who would have thought we could hit the jackpot like this. Her pussy feels so good AHHH!"
Yuuji bites your nipple and sucks on it. You embrace Yuuji's body and your right hand is grasped by Megumi.
Megumi's penis is slightly longer than the standard size but you still feel intoxicated by the pounding.
"Ahhh.. ahh.. so good Gumii," you say.
Megumi doesn't reply to you but your words make him even more horny. He holds your hips and looks at his penis entering your vagina.
"Your pussy... so tight... ahhh~!" squeals Megumi.
After a few minutes, you know you're going to cum soon. So you helped Megumi to move your bodies.
Megumi speeds up his movements and thrusts his penis into your vagina. You both came and your bodies were shaking violently.
Yuuji who was waiting for his turn immediately inserted his penis without waiting for your consent.
Your head jerks up as his penis enters. Yuuji's penis is slightly shorter than Megumi's, but it has a thicker diameter.
"Don't get too tight, pretty one," Yuuji whispered.
You try to do as Yuuji says but of course it feels difficult. Your pussy feels like it's being crushed by Yuuji's penis.
"Ah! Ahh! Ahh! Not so hard!" you say.
Yuuji chuckled. "This is how I play. I also wanted to prepare you."
Yuuji's eyes glanced at Megumi and of course the boy knew what he wanted. Megumi played with your nipples with both hands and chuckled.
"My uterus... Got hit by your penis... AHHH~!" you squeal.
"But it feels good, right?"
You couldn't reply to Yuuji. Yuuji also pounded his penis and screamed loudly. You also orgasmed at the same time as Yuuji.
"Let's continue our game," Yuuji said and Megumi smiled.
***
extended version available on patreon (https://msha.ke/whitelunaria)
preview extended version :
" Is your body still hot?" asked Megumi and you nodded.
Yuuji immediately glanced at Megumi with a meaningful look and Megumi could only exhale.
"Actually, we always wanted to do a double vaginal. You know what?" Yuuji asks.
"Isn't that... putting two dicks in here...?" you ask while pointing at your vagina.
Megumi nodded. "But if you don't want to, we won't force you. The choice is yours."
You stare at the two men in front of you with lustful eyes. You shyly looked at them with a pleading gaze.
"I want to... but slowly, okay?" you said softly.
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