wyzechyld

[wyzechyld]

Will you let me bleed out entirely?

Probably not, but almost.

And since I’m already used to living on breadcrumbs,

I’m a cheap option.

Maybe the cheapest.

Big dick!

I can entertain myself,

Text myself…

It’s even nice to pretend we’re in love, every once in a while.

Keeping the blood flowing , don’t stop.

Can’t stop, won’t stop!

Don’t let me die,

I’m one of a kind.

Clown eyes cast down,

Meets your eyes .

You’re one of

a kind /Or

may Be. Four for?

Her eyes point at floor,

Right at floor boards,

Inevitably bored

Round robin gamble

Roulette stretch out desperate hands get

enough to make it

Close enough to

Break it

I bet you’ll keep this up longer than I can keep it up these days,

strung out loud

Not proud and scantily

Shrouded

for occasions like this

in so many ways,

I wish I didn’t feel so hopeless…

[wyzechyld]

part of a recent reflection

[wyzechyld]

Hello her, I am him; the once in a lifetime kinda man.

i’m her btw. the once in a lifetime kinda woman.

[wyzechyld]

I tried to give you the love you never had,

and in return you gave me the pain I never deserved.

[wyzechyld]

Let people lose you. Let people be wrong about you. Learn to leave well enough alone. Often, the greatest peace is not found in correcting others. It's found in correcting yourself, accepting the lessons, and knowing when to walk away.

Morgan Richard Olivier

[wyzechyld]

Take this,

just another one-man monologue-

a dim-lit stage soaked in unraveling.

Tonight might be the last night

you’ll catch this version of me.

Not a goodbye, exactly-

more like a shedding.

The rest of me?

He’ll limp forward, wear the name,

still answer to the mirror.

He’ll be fine,

whatever fine is these days.

But this…

this is the eulogy for the ghost still gripping my spine,

the part too brittle to bend,

too bitter to bloom.

He’s dying tonight.

I’m cutting him loose like a gangrenous limb—

and it hurts like hell

to thank a wound

for keeping me alive.

Will you come to the funeral?

He loved you the most.

I told him I’d invite you.

But it’s alright if you don’t show.

We’re done holding our breath

for people who never learned to exhale with us.

[wyzechyld]

I really miss talking to you

I miss the feeling you gave me, like for the first time, when I looked around, I didn't feel so lost

I miss that, being found by you

I thought we thought we both knew what we were looking at

the potential between us

locked away to blend in

Now

A symphony of entropy overtakes everything time tried keeping safe but it was already too late

From the very beginning

It was all ready

Too

Late

[wyzechyld]

Electric eels coil in my throat,

Beneath the fruit of adam

Crisscrossed ruminations

And future tripping on the

Final destination

Four hours ’til closure,

And I sway—

To love lost,

And horror movie soundtracks

Play loudly in my

Head

Paralyzed by night-terrors,

I just sit

And stare

Until cognition slaps me back

A hairline crack

To my ego

But To break a mother’s back

or her heart

On the day of all days

Is evil

Empathy screams

In harmony with karma,

And I—we—don’t ever want to let go.

For a moment, I’m sobbing,

Heart throbbing,

Overblown,

Wondering—

Will tomorrow be the day

You leave this place?

Unfinished sentences,

Mouths flickering like

Golden fish,

Dancing between breaths—

But staying gold

Nonetheless

The sun hits strange

Thirty in too deep

Eyes flickering

in Morse code

But I can’t read Morse code

Even my breath sounds distant

Belonging to another existence

Time drips sideways.

And I laugh at the sound

Of sand

Feeling like nothing

Might just be something

And maybe that’s enough.

[wyzechyld]

Carving marks

Tag hearts

Irrevocably

Like footprints

in sand

Stark fades

Away

like a seranade

I dance

to

Tunes of you

moved

Unquestionably

Jacaranda dreams

whisper things

Wishy washy hope

cracked back and taken

intraveneously

I could really salute

Your ass

Endlessly

For ever and ever so

Easily

Last minute

Additions

Bring fruitions

Commentary

Missions

Explaining

Renditions

Of fate

Am I really too late?

Like really really?

But my bleeding heart

Weeps like a sage

My inner child

Screams with rage

My outer one too

Is just another

Scared

or sacred

or sacrilegious

Fool

Dreaming of meaning

more

to you...

[wyzechyld]

xc able thot

ration zuh

slipped

willnotheldwell

bentover

for u

shesaid

take it

but

i was

already

gone

not breathecho

long before

truth broke

Two rations

blessings

wrappedinreceipts

deep

To dress

exceedinglydead

Andnot2weep

bled

maybeforyou

I

cant

find

thethinkingthing

too two to true

&why

sign

thine

whenmine

is

empty

hollow

&notremembered

Crudefloating

folded

throughtime

or

web

spun

blind

bydesign

from hands i dont

recognize

portraits of you

again

andagain

a glitch

and

mBridgingtheouterlaborswithlayersoftraiters

[wyzechyld]

Each time I say goodbye...

— Clementine Von Radics, from In A Dream You Saw A Way To Survive; "The Fear" (via lunamonchtuna)

[wyzechyld]

[wyzechyld]

I never really fathomed

How unctuous

is

the surface

/of

a ghost

//

How unctuous the surface is a ghost

[wyzechyld]

— v, from “the gravity poem” (via letsbelonelytogetherr)

[wyzechyld]

You’ve gone quiet…

and maybe silence is the only language left

when pain sits louder than words.

I know you’re hurting, I can feel it in the distance between us.

You cling to the resentment like armor, as if letting go would leave you bare.

I get it. Truly, I do.

But God, I wish it wasn’t like this.

I wish forgiveness came easier, like a breath instead of a burden.

It’s always seemed like your heart had one hand in the fire, while I stood there with a bucket of ice, and you silently wondered to yourself, “wtf is he doing with a bucket of ice?”

You burnt through every page so fast, and of course all that you ever found were ashes.

Our love was such an updraft through fate.

And me?

I’m worn from the fall, falling in love to be cast out over and over again and again.

Like a tide pushed back by the moon you’ve become.

It’s wearing on me, on the way I see my own reflection. But I like who I am… at least I used to.

I need to hold on to that light, or I fear I won’t find my way through this.

So maybe… maybe I’m better off alone.

Maybe I’ve been more weight than warmth, and with everything in your life so unbalanced, unpredictable, adding someone like me…

It seems to just tip the scale.

As much as I wanted to believe that we were something sacred,

maybe…

Just maybe, we’re not what’s best.

[wyzechyld]

#relatable

[wyzechyld]

How can you ignore me like I’m nothing?

I know your life pulls you away, but I still hoped you might stay. Not forever— but long enough to show me love isn’t this tough.

I wished I held the kind of weight to shift fate, or just enough to keep your heart in range, like gravity, or something you’d never dream to change.

But now Im fading, graceless while you’re forgetting, my stillness moves becoming faceless, traceless while you’re… forgetting…

What it was like, enveloped inside my warmth; I mean, what was it like? And why didn’t you take it seriously? The cold was serious… it still is… and so was I.

One day, though, you’ll feel the frigid cost.

I’d never wish it upon you but I know you’ll count each thing like you’re penny pinching, begging to wake up soon.

Every loss will make you miss each kiss you let slip by, denied even, erasing the signs of life I once lived for; and when you look to the stars for why, they’ll say nothing, and it will echo within every space you left me waiting, wide open and craving, only you.

How can you ignore me like I’m nothing, like I never meant anything?