yhwhyireh

[yhwhyireh]

Wish you were here

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[yhwhyireh]

[yhwhyireh]

6 sept 2021 - 

collecting fragments and moments of past autumns... lots of cards to write home and abroad in :-)

etsy / instagram

[yhwhyireh]

26 august 2021

hello everyone! how are you? the days wax and wane like the moon, they fleet by without a care for anything.

these two months have been cracking at change - in a month and a half I have moved three cities/countries and I cannot seem to catch time's rhythm... any set routines are but likenesses and farces, and some days start wonderfully but crash and burn, and some days predispose sadness but end in a common, larger joy. I guess what I am learning is to loosen my grip on everything but God - my one goal; the largeness to my life.

I will start a job in one and a half weeks, and how I am where I am is only blessing. there are many pros and cons to every situation but I am refusing to recognise anything but His hand in my life. it is so easy (and we are so conditioned) to compare and try to go places that bring us more places but I am here, now, and I am thankful.

I am thinking of restarting my letterbox once I am settled in my new house, so if you are so interested to receive a letter (free for all, anywhere) you can visit my submissions page here: https://yhwhyireh.tumblr.com/submit

thank you and I hope you find joy today!

chelsea / instagram

[yhwhyireh]

[CWTW]

I’ve been taking medication for depression and anxiety for six months now, and I’ve had entire weeks where I don’t think about taking my own life.

I used to think about it every day. Every. Single. Day. I thought it was normal. I didn’t know it could be like this: for weeks at a time, simply feeling alive.

At the homeless nonprofit where I’m a chaplain, we get prayer requests. The hardest one I’ve ever read is: “I want to feel like I want to live.”

Depression has no rules. Only the fog. In it, even the kindness of others is a burden.

Depression robs the world of all significance. As if nothing could happen again. I cannot see the end, wrapped in an infinity of cellophane.

I want to say it gets easier.

But I never know if the next one will win.

Even with medication, therapy, and community: in a pandemic with severe injustice and racialized trauma and harmful churches and leaders, it seems I am only taking medication to tolerate a world that I should not endure. It is to endure a furnace while my skin continues to burn.

I wonder if my time is limited. Depression is terminal, as they say. Will the very fact of living be enough to stay alive? Is it possible to hold my breath by breathing?

Dear me, tomorrow: please. Hold these simple truths.

Simple truths.

My wife’s hand.

My daughter’s voice.

My tears. I can trust them. They are mine.

Laughter. Deep laughter from the stomach. Laughter in the valleys and the summits. It is “the language of the survivor.”

Food. Good food. Books. To get lost in. Blankets. To hide in.

Voices. We march. I add to the voice of the protest, the choir of the wounded seeking better. I am told I am needed.

I hold onto God. Despite my doubts. Despite all the shouting against a God who did not answer me.

I hold onto: Nothing can separate us from the love of God. Not even my broken brain.

Grace. Grace that remains permanent, even in the worst of it. The grace that meets me at rock bottom, and when I fall through, grace is the rock deeper still.

Coffee. The drink of heaven. I go to sleep thinking of the taste of coffee in the morning.

Small things keep us alive.

I am still alive.

Dear me, tomorrow:

please be alive.

— J.S.

[yhwhyireh]

we are opening preorders for our animal adventures postcard set! 

check out my etsy here and my webshop here - order the set before 18 June to get USD4 off! 

instagram

lots of love x

[yhwhyireh]

hello! happy june! I have been making animal illustrations all week!

check them out here

[yhwhyireh]

[yhwhyireh]

[yhwhyireh]

Mysteries, yes - Mary Oliver

instagram

[yhwhyireh]

[yhwhyireh]

[yhwhyireh]

[yhwhyireh]

1 april 2021 

happy april! making things alongside working on my final design project... 

webshop / instagram

[yhwhyireh]

24 march 2021 

how are you? the lack of spring in the tropics is kind of getting to me. lots of thoughts for the months ahead (do I travel back to school? do I stay here until I graduate? my job search? illustration projects? design project?) and today is one of those days where I really need to sit, switch off, and pray. 

dreaming of a time where tomorrow would work itself - and that could be here, now if only I let it (Matthew 6:34)

[yhwhyireh]

I am a writer perhaps because I am not a talker.

Gwendolyn Brooks (via macrolit)

[yhwhyireh]

made new flower greeting cards to bring in seasons of spring x 

link here