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lol ao3's recent outage was because they hit INT_MAX bookmarks

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This essay, translated from Japanese, is ostensibly about why platformers scroll from left to right

but it provides so much context that it also acts as a good primer for video game hardware and game dev culture in 1980s Japan

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this post about the extremely odd & sometimes-unexpected dynamics (& finances & political economy) of Boarding School World™ is quite a lot of fun

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the intercal challenge

hi everyone. I love photography.

I challenge you to find a photo that you've taken, one that you love, maybe two or three, and reblog this post with it. not too many! there are only two rules:

it MUST be a photo that YOU have taken.

you MUST put some effort into making it look good.

if you can't find a photo that's Just Right, I encourage you to go outside and take one. it can be right outside your home, or down the road, or across the country.

phone, digital, film, edited, filtered, raw, grainy, crisp, don't care - find that photo, one that YOU have taken, and attach it here.

here's my contribution that I took this evening on my phone:

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Sacabambaspis.

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*burgers your pants*

Drawing meme idea:

Everyone draws Burgerpants.

That's it, just Burgerpants. But EVERYONE has to draw him, regardless of drawing skill. In fact, the worse you are at drawing, the better/more accurate he'll turn out.

Maybe people who've studied how to draw should do something like draw with their non-dominant hand, just to make their drawing intentionally worse.

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Predicting Yield

We’ve all experienced the frustration of ketchup refusing to leave the bottle or toothpaste that shoots out suddenly. These materials are yield stress fluids, which transition from solid-like behavior to liquid flow once the right amount of force is applied.  (Image credit: haideyy; research credit: D. Keane et al.; via APS Physics) Read the full article

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During lockdown I worked on two projects: one was a ditch that needed to be cleared out of tules and cattails but turtles lived there. So I’d follow the excavator scooping out the vegetation and make sure no turtles were trapped in it, and if they were, freeing them and putting them in a safe part of the ditch. It’s extremely muddy, sticky work. Hold on, I have a photo of one of the guys:

No one is having a good time.

The OTHER project was going to destroy rare salamander habitat and so we had to buy some appropriate habitat. But every mitigation bank was sold out. I found a guy selling future mitigation bank credits through the powers of making a lot of phone calls and then, through the power of polite requests, got our Wildlife Agency rep to sign off on this plan. Except. You can’t say “I gave seven figures to a guy who promises to someday make habitat”, that guy could abscond. You also can’t be like “I supes promise to pay for mitigation AFTER the project.” because WE could not pay out. We were, for various reasons, disinclined to delay the project. The Wildlife Agency rep — bless her, she really held my hand through this whole process — was like “how about you put the money in escrow?” Great. A plan.

So I call an escrow company — which was not an organization used to being cold-called, much less by someone standing next to an excavator, covered in mud. I was trying to provide only the information needed to enable success and NOT go on a five-ten minute rant on salamander life cycles. Also I was DEEPLY out of my depth.

“Hi! I was wondering if you could hold money in an escrow account for a longer period?”

“… Well, in some circumstances we can hold it for up to 90 days — but we’d need to know the circumstances.”

“Ah! I need someone to hold it for up to two years? Do you know of any companies who’d be able to help me?”

“What. What is happening with the house that this is necessary?”

“Oh uh. It’s not a house, per se, it’s a rare salamander mitigation bank. It needs to be built.”

“The salamanders need a custom house?”

“No no no no no uh. They need a pond. We’re paying someone to make a pond. But! They need time to make the pond. Hence the escrow account. So. Who could?”

“So like a lizard house?”

“They are amphibians?”

“Let me. Transfer you to my supervisor.”

<after a pause a different person comes on the line but also unfortunately at this moment the excavator operator fishes a turtle out of the ditch.>

“Hi! Sorry one second I need to put down the phone to help a turtle.” <interlude> “Thank you so much for waiting! I’m back! Can you talk to me about escrow options?”

“What was happening with the turtle?”

“Oh it was trapped in some cattails but I got it out. Sorry for putting down the phone — you need both hands to grab them because they bite! I need an escrow account to hold funds for up to two years?”

“For a house for lizards? Are you a zoo?”

“Ah! Salamanders, actually! And a mitigation bank, not a house. I actually work for X organization.”

“What is a mitigation bank?” (The critical question!)

“Oh when you’re building something and need to impact some rare species habitat you can pay someone to make new rare species habitat.”

“Huh.”

“But this habitat is incomplete! It doesn’t have a pond. So my organization won’t pay until AAAAAAAAA excuse me sorry I fell into a ditch. My organization needs there to be a pond there before they pay for the property. So one path forward is an escrow account.”

“Are you OK?”

“Yes absolutely!”

“What’s the cost of this bank?”

“Two million dollars.”

<the tenor of the conversation became markedly warmer at this point.>

“OK if you get my your contact information then I’ll email you some options and then we can discuss — do you have time now?”

“Unfortunately I do not have email access right this second. Also I need to get out of the ditch. Could we put a pin in this conversation and circle back tomorrow?”

“Of course, I look forward to working with your organization?”

“Thank you so much!”

“Good luck with the. Ditch. And turtles?”

“Thank you! Have a great day!”

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by @beetlemoses

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Happy let Papyrus say fuck day!

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I have been thinking of this Canal+ ad with napoleon in it

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I took my little brother (autistic, mostly non verbal) out and he was using his voice keyboard to tell me something, and this little boy (maybe 4 or 5?) heard him and asked me "Is he a robot??" I tried to explain to him that no, he isn't a robot, he just communicates differently, but my darling brother was in the background max volume "I am robot I am robot I am robot I am robot"

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Source

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