six-1impossiblethings

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pokèmonize yourself!!!!

spin this wheel to see your pokemon type

spin this one to see how you'll look like

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well, in Greek mythology the text says that Zeus sees Dionysus into his thigh to save his life after accidentally killing his mother (long story), and it's generally accepted that 'thigh' is a euphemism for 'testicles', so... It's not an unheard of concept? I guess?

Tried an LLM-powered thesaurus today just for giggles and it helpfully informed me that a synonym for "leg" is "penis".

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Jackson Twins AU

Imagine, for a moment, a Percy Jackson who grew up an only child, but was born a twin. His stillborn brother, Theo, an ever-present shadow that he misses.

Imagine a Percy Jackson who grows up sharing dreams with a stranger boy, who looks a little bit too much like his mum for it to be a coincidence.

Imagine a Percy Jackson who goes on his first quest at the age of 12, the same as this strange boy he knows - but he's not a boy anymore, but a girl.

Imagine a Percy Jackson who guides, cares for, and mentors little Nico di Angelo in the same way as this girl mentors little Jason Grace.

Imagine a Percy Jackson who mirrors his twin on their journeys in life, until they finally properly meet for the Prophecy of Seven.

---

Theseus Jackson is born to Neptune and Sally Jackson on August 18, just before sunrise. Just before his brother. He's taken away though, and the Mist is used to make Sally believe he'd been stillborn. He's trained by Lupa and raised by the Vestal Virgins of New Rome, a template for Jason Grace to follow in four years.

Theseus Jackson leaves his mark on Camp Jupiter and New Rome, growing up in the legion. He builds a reputation as the son of Neptune. He changes attitudes, just a little bit.

Then, when he's twelve, he realises he's not a boy, but a girl. Her brother has just discovered he's a demigod.

She chooses the name Iovita. He is claimed by Poseidon.

They start their first quests on the same day. They finish their quests on the same day. Vita heads toward the East, to a city in New York state. Percy heads toward the West, to Los Angeles in California.

The next summer, Vita goes on a quest with Jason to deal with the Trojan sea monster in Washington state. Her fatal flaw is excessive practicality. Percy goes on a quest with Annabeth to the Sea of Monsters off Florida. His fatal flaw is excessive loyalty.

In winter, Vita is on another quest and guides Reyna to the Wolf House. Hylla chooses to join the Amazons instead, before they can leave the dock. She goes on a quest that ends on Mount Olympus. Percy is on a retrieval mission and guides Nico to Camp Half-Blood. Bianca chooses to join the Hunters instead, before they can leave Westover Hall. He goes on a quest that ends on Mount Tam.

The labyrinth is used against both camps the next summer. Iovita and Percy help lead their respective camps in the battles.

The final skirmishes of the Great Prophecy take place on August 18. Their birthday. Everything ends at dawn, between the twins' times of birth.

Everything regarding them has been equal, balanced, mirrored, measured.

When Hera takes Percy, in this world, she does not take Jason. Instead, she takes Vita, because the twins cannot meet yet. (They have passed each other on quests, seen each other and helped each other when their paths cross. This is not the same as properly meeting each other.)

Vita wakes up on that bus, holding the hand of a girl who says they're best friends and a row behind a boy who is supposedly her boyfriend. She doesn't remember anything other than one name, and an affectionate laugh: Reyna. Percy eventually wakes up in the Wolf House, surrounded by wolves. He doesn't remember anything other than one name, and a sharp smile: Annabeth.

Vita has an easier time at Camp Half-Blood because of the legacy Percy left. Percy has an easier time at Camp Jupiter because of the changes Vita caused.

Vita has big shoes to fill, with this brother of hers having saved Olympus (what is this jealousy she feels?), and revolutionised the treatment of the non-Olympian gods and goddesses. Percy has big shoes to fill, with this sister of his having destroyed Othrys (why is he jealous?), and revolutionised the perception of Neptune and his children.

Vita has to rescue the Queen of the Gods from Mother Earth before the solstice. Percy has to rescue the god of (Peaceful) Death from the Bane of Pluto before the Feast of Fortuna.

Vita takes Drew Tanaka and Leo Valdez on her quest. Percy takes Hazel Levesque and Frank Zhang.

Vita chooses a bunk far away from her brother's in the Poseidon cabin - she refuses to be an extension of this great hero, because she is her own person. Percy takes the only empty bunk in the Fifth Cohort barracks, and his glad it's far away from his sister's - he refuses to be an extension of this great soldier, because he is his own person.

Vita ends up becoming a mentor to a lot of the younger campers, and helps Annabeth and Grover lighten up and relax a bit. She creates her own place as a leader in the structure of Camp Half-Blood. Percy ends up becoming a mentor to a lot of the younger legionnaires, and helps Jason and Reyna lighten up and relax a bit. He creates his own place as a leader in the structure of Camp Jupiter.

When Percy finally drinks the gorgon's blood, saved from Phineas on his quest to Alaska, it helps with both of their memories.

Vita looks back on these warm moments and realises, oh. Oh. She has a massive crush on Reyna. Percy looks back on these warm moments and realises, oh. Oh. He's not in a good relationship.

Vita catastrophized her relationship with Reyna when she couldn't remember. Percy romanticized his relationship with Annabeth when he couldn't remember. They're now able to be objective about the relationships, and everything has changed.

Vita is still a little bit doubtful of her crush. Percy is still a little bit hopeful for his relationship.

They meet for the first time when Annabeth, Drew, Vita, Leo, and Grover fly over New Rome.

Reyna enters Vita's line of sight, and her heart stutters for a moment in response. Annabeth judo flips Percy, and the legionnaires of Camp Jupiter react accordingly.

Vita stays quiet. Percy stays quiet.

Something goes wrong, and they have to leave quickly after the peaceful lunch and reunions with old, half-remembered friends.

Hazel, Frank, Percy, and a retired legionnaire join the five already on the Argo II.

Vita and Percy properly meet 5 minutes later, in the communal bedroom belowdecks. Things are awkward, until Vita asks for stories of their mum and Percy asks for stories of her childhood in return.

Things turn out pretty good.

Then Annabeth is caught by Arachne, and Vita bends to cut off the web still attached to the proud girl's ankle. She manages to saw it off, but it's now stuck to her and pulling her towards the hole to Tartarus. Percy, per his loyalty, tries to catch her and hold her up. They both fall.

Things are bad, sure, but their bond strengthens. They fully and properly understand each other. They do dark things they wouldn't otherwise, but understand the necessity and don't judge the other for it.

They come out of the House of Hades and continue to follow through on their quest.

Vita gets a cut on her leg. Percy still gets a bloody nose. Gaea still stirs.

The battle at Half-Blood Hill is fought and won.

Vita asks Reyna out. Percy breaks up with Annabeth.

Percy goes home to his mother. Vita meets her mother.

The Ship of Theseus: If each plank of wood in a ship is replaced over time, until all the ship has been replaced, is it still the same ship? If another ship has been made using all the original materials, which is the original ship?

Theseus and Iovita: If Theseus Jackson survived and grew up, but changed and took on a new name, is it still the same child? If a body has been buried under the name Theseus Jackson, which child is Theseus?

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its fucking dember.

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We’ll have to do dinner Thursday night instead.

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Happy 10 years in the ball pit

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@stealingyourbones

I feel like you'd like this one

req'd by @chaos-connie

good as any currency round these parts tbh

text: bones can be exchanged for goods and services

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happy Thursday the 20th

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"oiled-up queer"

I mean you're not wrong-

from now on your tumblr nickname is whatever you get from this sexual identity generator  ☆

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Only day you can rb this

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what if we took the kid from this post …

AND GAVE HIM THE BACKGROUND/PERSONALITY OF THIS POST

AND MAYBE WE CALL HIM GREG OR SOMETHING.

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if I ever spam likes on your blog but don't reblog, I'm sorry, I'm going to go back and reblog, but I'm falling into a doom scroll. please bear with me

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im laughing so hard because no matter what song you listen to 

spiderman dances to the beat

no matter what song ive been testing it and lauing my ass off for an hour

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WELL.

THAT HIT ME RIGHT IN THE HEART.

thanks, op /pos

Making a "Which Batfam member are you"? but im basically calling people out- its so much fun >:)

Now just gotta finish the result summaries <33

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