#(commitment issues my arse)

[heavywoolcoat]

[enchantressiren]

❝𝐏𝐀𝐂: 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐫𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐞.. 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐰𝐞 𝐦𝐞𝐭? 𝐍𝐨, 𝐈 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐲𝐨𝐮’𝐫𝐞 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐞. 𝐍𝐨, 𝐈 𝐚𝐦 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭—𝐈𝐭’𝐬 𝐨𝐤𝐚𝐲, 𝐈 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞.❞

How do people view your person? (Detailed).

Masterlist.

Author’s note,

I was so stoked to finish this pac so fast, but pile 01 had to be secretive and everything got postponed. ):<

Dividers

Pile 01.

Your person has such a misty, dark aura about them. Such a sad feeling that surrounds their heart, and the only person that unlocks the key to their heart is you or will be you. People think they have a sense of grandiosity or people assume they have NPD (narcissistic personality disorder), and yet they don’t. They come off as ‘a high horse’ or intuition says, “arrogant, nasty, and conceited.” The only reason people think this about them is because they are too reserved for their “own” good and follow their own standards of what is right and wrong. Their sense of morality is based on what has felt right with their mother and what they learn to appreciate from their grandfather. They have had an awful relationship with their dad's side of the family, and their morals are all focused on what their dad’s side will not do.

People see them as someone who needs to have a stick removed from their arse. I feel like you already know who this is and have had sex with them in the past and kept the friendship because of the chemistry, or it just feels right. And the rest will meet the person and feel that intense connection. Although most of you don’t believe in soulmates or platonic soulmates, know that they also feel the same way about the concept—both of you have been seeing the same signs or have mentioned it here and there. Most people know about red strings, and the same can be said about this relationship, whether it starts out as friends to lovers or friends with benefits to friends, then to fwb, to lovers. I know that you want me to get to the sexual part of the reading, but I need you to get an understanding of this person.

You need to allow yourself to have this relationship. There are a lot of commitment issues surrounding your heart. It’s actually hard for me to channel this pile. There is this nagging need to get rid of this relationship that I feel the need to disinclude your pile and simply say that there are only four piles. You want to be kept hidden, especially from tarot and intuitive readers, yet crave the same feeling of red strings. You need to have a word with yourself and actually be honest with yourself. What is it that you are seeking? And I know that a lot of readers have mentioned this to you, so I will say it again. What are you seeking? What do you want? Do you actually want love, or are you craving to love yourself? Sometimes we crave love from ourselves and mistake it from others and then become frustrated with why they aren’t making us feel loved. So I asked one more time, what are you actually seeking? Because there is only one lifetime, is this the life you seriously want? To deny yourself what you want for what exactly?

As you ask yourself these, I want you to fully feel them. Like, genuinely, breathe and allow yourself to feel them. You are safe, and you are allowed to feel them. And if you must, you can always write it down to someone that makes you feel safe and delete it. That safeness is what is necessary for you to have a change of heart for yourself. And again, it is something you deserve to have, whether or not you believe it yourself, but based on my intuition (which is unbiased), you do.

How do people view you? Imagine yourself in a traditional Japanese room, where there are tatami mats and the view side is a lovely cool riverside. There are fireflies in the nightlight, similar to the lanterns in Tangled. Fully immerse yourself in this scene as you hear whispers about someone gorgeous coming to meet you. A lot of people have had a crush on this person; they ooze sex appeal and fame. They have made people fall down to their knees despite their sexual orientation; they have made people question their sexuality because of them. Finally, this person comes to you, sits on their knees, and stares at you with a joyous smile, hoping you give the reaction they are so used to seeing. When you don’t, their smile falters, and so they do everything in their power for the same reaction, only to be stunned with nonchalance. Your nonchalance steals their heart, and their mind cannot handle it. You have made them realize making you happy is their only goal in life.

So I ask you again, are you going to push down your actual wants because of your fears when you are going to receive someone who would knock down everything, change their mindset just to make you happy? To see you smile because you made them feel human. Don’t you want to feel happy too? What is your goal in this lifetime—what do you actually want? Happiness or fear?

... Or them?

Channeled song:

All I ask - Adele

Masterlist.

Pile 02.

Trigger warning: Suicide but as a metaphor.

One word, it’s so hot. You know those people who never have a sex drive but they are into sex? Yeah, this is seriously the vibe. Their aura is hot, their face is hot, they have an amazing body, everything about them is seriously hot. You ever seen someone so damn tantalizing that you want to have sex with them but you have to stop yourself because one they may be a stranger and two, how do you know they are actual genuine. Same thought process here. They make you want to rip your clothes off and make out with them until you are gasping for air and squirming for release. They are the type of person who will edge on their lover until they are sobbing for release and when they give the go, they trick you to edge you further. Playing cat and mouse with them doesn’t even exist, you simply the bait and you got trap. That’s it.

They have this pull on you that you just have to give in, their aura is so sexy that instantly you want to follow them around like a filthy dog, doing everything they want even if you had to off yourself. And even if you did off yourself, during your grave and in the after life, you would do everything to become human to see them once more. The pull they have on others seriously makes you want to manifest that same aura to grab others attention and the best part is that they are genuine. They have worked on themselves so much, have done so much shadow work that their shadow work and their light self are simply best friend. The same aura they radiate is the same shadow work they fought with for so long and that is also something you have to do. Work on yourself to see them.

Some of you are desperate in meeting your future person that you have done the opposite of all the advices you were given and have heard from others. You cannot gain a happy ending with doing the opposite and assuming it is going to work out because you affirm for it. Affirming does not happen instantly whether or not you want to believe it and I don’t care that you are living in the end. It still does not happen instantly. You have to wake up and understand that others are simply trying to help you out, they want to see you strive and become better for yourself. So, if you don’t want to improve for yourself then improve for them. Your desperation is going steer them away from you and you are going to end up with nothing. So, instead of living in the end (since that has not helped you from the moment you learned about it), live in the world you are in right now and become better for yourself.

And becoming better for yourself is not a bad thing. You can still do it through other activities, you don’t have to focus on healing 24/7 and call it a day. From your past experiences and now, what has helped you heal properly compared to others? You need to use your past to help heal yourself. Those who are fully focus on the manifestation community, understand this: you cannot manifest what you want if you don’t take care of your inner thoughts and feelings. You cannot manifest if you don’t actually take care of yourself because being positive all the time will strain everything you want. And again, I don’t care what you say or if you become angry, whatever it is, this is based on your energy and what your shadow self has been saying for so long. So take a step down, okay? Listen to yourself and fight for what you actually want.

You want this person. So you need to heal and be kind to your shadow self. But you also have to stop living in the end and acting as if you have to be positive all the time because you don’t. It’s not healthy and it has caused you to lose the trust you have with yourself. Always asking around for help yet not following through. So for once, listen to your gut and trust the advice your gut tells you.

Channeled songs:

Say it - Ne-yo

So anxious - Ginuwine

Masterlist.

Pile 03.

Your future person is a contradictory person with a streak of playing with others. They like to use others to their advantage, see them cry over them, and use that to gain energy. They remind me of a vampire energy, always sucking away others' energy with negativity, but when it comes to bad people. The thing is, I know that on paper or in writing this, your future person seems like a red flag, but my intuition says that you have to meet them personally. That there is more that meets the eye and everything that I will be telling you will be the shallow parts and how others see them. The songs are their real selves, so if you want to be on a ride, then don’t listen to the songs, and if you want to actually understand them, listen to the song without doing anything and actually see them for who they are. Because they want someone like you, and they will do anything to have you.

I know that your pile is insanely short, and that’s on them. They don’t want anyone to know what they are like, how people really see them. Actually, they feel insanely insecure to even add it. “Yes, I use people, so I should be a confident person or I should be a manipulative red flag, but the truth is—” They don’t have the balls to even tell you anything about themselves. There are so many walls around them that if they were to reveal everything to you—you would leave them with nothing like __ have. Everything I am channeling from them is blank, always “I don’t want them to know” or “They shouldn’t know this about me, they will want to run, I am a disappointment.” They have a lot of gaslighting energy surrounding them, a lot of bad family members always using them, and thus is why they hunt bad people. They think that hunting bad people and giving them a taste of their own medicine is a sinful action and that they would go to hell (or if they believed in it), but another part of them thinks that is what should happen to these people because no one will fix them if it is not them. They kind of have a hero complex but at the same time a victim mindset.

A lot of you have wanted to meet them from the readings you previously read and have had this need to help them because you have a lot of love to give. And I love that for you, but you need to let it go and let them heal themselves. They are not someone you need in your life, and the chances of even meeting them are slim. Each pathway you have walked along, they have followed you the same way, and each time you were supposed to meet, they have sabotaged it. So meeting them right now would cause you a lot of pain, and that is not what you need in your life. I understand (once more) the love that you want to give to them because you believe that others should be loved at their worst just as one would be at their best. But their worst will ruin you, and you need to only love them at their best. Give them time to become their best self, and once you meet, instantly you will know it is them and vice versa. You have seen them around multiple times, always brushing against one another, or small hi/bye, or just a small glance at each other. Some of you are even friends with them and have been feeling an itch; some of you know them from work or have seen them around your nearby shops, some of you have a contradictory situation ship, and others are simply strangers in your area or from abroad. Whatever the case is, this relationship is meant to be, but only if they heal and you are patient. Stop focusing on the future and live a little in the present.

Channeled song:

Mirrors - Justin Timberlake

So sick - Ne-yo

We fell in love in October - Girl in red

Masterlist.

Pile 04.

The smell of alcohol brims up into your nose as you smell the richness coming from this drink. Though it appears as fine liquor, if you dug deeper into the brand, you would find out it only oozes elegance and prime. Each time you think you have solved a problem with something addressed as “too good to be true,” are the times you fail to notice how blessed you have been. Each time you try to find something wrong with a positive trait about someone, or about something assuming there is a catch, are the times you will miss this drink and crave it till dawn.

Your person reeks of richness, their outfits are from the old money aesthetic, their gazes are the only thing that draws you in, and the only thing you can focus on. Those little smile creases, those little eye grins, and those subtle movements into stealing your jewelry (no, they aren’t a thief). Their movements make your eyes glitch into the matrix and make you assume you have shifted into another reality, taking away your breath from how sensual their movements are and how natural it actually is. Their voice makes you want to take a double take and earn a million parking tickets just to see them again—their voice makes people wet, making others want to fuck your person raw and until they're oozing from drool, unfiltered sex, and cum. Their voice is the prominent part of this relationship and what has made you both connect (you both have nice voices and both have a kink for it).

When they pull you in or their victim in, they make sure you fall in love with their smile. They have worked hard on making it look good to use it as a manipulation tactic, and quite frankly, you’re addicted to it. It will be the only thing on your mind, and trying to rid yourself of it would require erasing their whole existence out of your mind. And that is something you cannot do, it would just hurt, it would be so painful to rid of something so elegantly, so fucking perfect—gosh.

You’re in pain and in need of comfort? They would come to your aid on a horse and come down like a royal person kneeling down or doing a courtesy to make sure when you are in pain, the only thing on your mind is their movement. To distract you from the pain, or perhaps make you fall in love with their act of “kindness.” Seriously, it should be both to them; they crave your validation after all, but then again.. If I were to tell you how much they crave you and how much they have changed themselves to find the right person, this storyline wouldn’t be so fun.

Channeled songs:

Poker face - Lady Gaga

The edge of glory - Lady Gaga

Masterlist.

[ohtobeleah]

Was It Over? // Jake Seresin

-> Chapter Twelve: [Bring Me The Horizon]

Summary: After Jensen and Jake finish their face-off, you tell Jake how it is. He practices the art of holding himself accountable for his actions, and you get a call that would send you into a downward spiral. Putting you in jeopardy right before your surgery.

Warnings: MAIN CHARACTER DEATH Sick!reader. Breast cancer diagnosis. Jake Seresin x F!reader. Angst, hospital & medical inaccuracies. SLOW BURN ROMANCE/ Inaccurate medical information. Relationship turmoil. Mentions of religion. JEALOUS JAKE!

Word Count: 5.1k

Author Note: WOW and we’re back baby. Another year has passed us by and we are finishing this series. Strap in for the final three episodes of this roller coaster of a series. You never know where we might just end up.

Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist

The triangular theory of love is a theory developed by Robert Sternberg. In the context of interpersonal relationships, the three components of love according to the triangular theory are, intimacy, passion, and a decision/commitment component. For Jake, he felt like love was more than just a triangular theory. Love is all-encompassing in every aspect of life. And if you look closely, love can be seen all around us in all different forms. 

“Bradshaw, now’s not the time man,” Jake sighed as he made his way back down the hospital hallway to your room, walking with his shoulders down and his ego battered and bruised. “I gotta fix an issue and my head’s not–” Before Jake could finish his sentence, Rooster interrupted with a crucial question he needed answered now. 

“How is your mother gonna react when I show up to take your kids?” The genuine concern in Bradley’s voice was clear enough for Jake to stay on the line as he walked. “Do I need to be concerned about her calling the cops?” 

“Dude,” Jake groaned to himself in frustration as he walked with purpose down the hall. He could feel his rage and frustration bubbling to the surface with every step he took. Who did this Jensen guy think he was? Who did Jake think he was? You didn’t ask for any of this and you definitely didn’t deserve his tantrum before. “She’s not gonna call the cops on you, just tell her to call me if you have any issues and get Jas to help you.” 

“Your mother is a terrifying woman–” Rooster added, just to rub salt into Jake’s already existing childhood wounds. 

“Well, at least she’s alive.” Jake had never regretted a sentence more in his life. The second he realised what he’d said and who he was speaking to, his heart fell straight out of his arse. “Bradshaw I didn’t mean–” Before Jake had a chance to speak, before he had a chance to explain that he wasn’t talking about Carole—he was talking about you—the line went dead. 

“Fuck!” Jake looked at his phone screen to see the call had indeed been ended. He felt the panic inside his chest. The guilt. 

Jake had developed a pretty uncanny ability to fuck things up. He couldn’t help himself at the moment. He was having a hard time regulating his emotions. It never had been his strong suit, but now it was worse than ever. Perhaps the idea of losing you forever was the cause. Jake couldn’t accept the possibility that there was a good to fair chance you might not walk away from this fight. 

But he could see the bottom of your bed again and where your feet were underneath the breathable hospital blanket that did nothing to keep you warm. With every step Jake took in the hall, he got closer and closer to where he’d left you. And with every step he took he tried to formulate an apology that would reflect his utter sorrow. His pain. His guilt. You were the first person that deserved an apology for Jake’s actions. Bradley would just have to wait. 

In hospitals, people see addiction every day. It’s shocking how many kinds of addiction exist. It would be far too easy if it were just drugs, alcohol and cigarettes people were addicted to. The hardest part about kicking an addiction is wanting to kick it. I mean we get addicted for a reason, right?

Often, too often, things start as a normal part of your life and at some point, cross the line into obsessive needs, compulsive out of out-of-control desires. It’s the high people chase. The high that makes everything else…fade away. But nothing could make Jake Seresin fade away. Nothing so far had helped you kick the addiction. Not even when you left. 

The harsh reality about addiction is it never ends well. Because eventually, whatever it is that was getting you that high…stops feeling good and starts to hurt. So when the very person you were addicted to walked back into your hospital room, the hurt started all over again well and truly after the high had died down. 

“Okay,” Jake stopped in his tracks when he saw that look in your eyes. Although a sense of calm washed over him the second he saw you again, he knew he was probably the last person you wanted to see after the way he behaved before. “I recognised I’m in the wrong here.” It was the look he wished he’d never been on the receiving end of again. A look of disappointment mixed with anger, hatred, and, above all, sadness. “I owe you an apology.” 

“No thanks,” The tone you conveyed was sinister. There was no warmth. No love. No room for compassion or empathy. “I’m not interested in another empty apology.” You didn't even look Jake’s way. You just continued on with the little word finder you had picked up in Jensen and Jake’s absence. “If you’re done swinging your dick around in the hall like a psychopath, I need to rest.” 

Jake was stunned. He wasn’t sure how to respond. He knew he deserved that. He knew he’d taken things too far. He knew he’d flown over the handlebars the second Jensen stepped into your room. But it was all out of fear of losing you. Why couldn’t you see that? Jake felt as if he could stand right in front of you and you’d look straight through him. 

“Honey, don’t be like that,” Jake sighed as he took a few steps towards your bedside. The bouquet Jensen had brought you was lying haphazardly on the little bedside cupboard. “I shouldn’t have acted the way I did alright, I know, and I promise you I’m trying here.” Jake sighed as he looked at the flowers another man had gone out of his way to buy you. A dying man. 

A dead man walking. 

“I’m glad you’re self-aware,” You replied yet again without paying any mind to Jake’s whereabouts in your room. “Never really was your strong suit.” You murmured just loud enough for Jake to hear your mild insult. You could have said it louder, hell, you should have. But regardless of Jake’s actions…he was an addictive drug. One that made it incredibly hard to kick the habit. One you knew you’d go back to. One you wished loved you the same way you loved him. 

“Jensen knocked some sense into me,” Jake tried his best to explain all the while he tried to hold back the lump in his throat. The kind of lump that brought tears and panic attacks with it. “He was kind enough to set the record straight.” 

“You understand how big of a piece of shit you have to be to say what you said, right?” It was the first time your tone had changed. There was something beyond painful in the way you spoke. Something Jake had tried time and time again not to be the cause of. Heartbreak. Betrayal even. “You jealous, insecure man.” 

For a second, Jake absorbed the blow. He took it on the chin like a champion because nothing you were saying was wrong. He was scared of losing the love of his life in a way that wasn’t just through marriage. 

“I know,” Jake replied as he picked up the bouquet and looked around. He was looking for somewhere to put them. Somewhere to display the beauty that they emulated. Beauty that reflected you. Where could he get a jug or something to put these in? “I don’t have an excuse to give you, honey,” Jake was trying his best to stick to the honesty is the best policy crap he’d been taught as a child. “I’m just, I got so worked up when he came in here knowing more about you than I did and–” 

“Jensen is a friend from group therapy,” You explained yet again. “And this is the last time I’m gonna say it before I let you run off with whatever version of a warped reality you wanna believe but I swear, there isn’t anyone else.” You sat up a little straighter in your bed as you closed your find-a-word book. “I have cancer, Jake. In what world would anyone want me?” 

“You love her, don’t you? You’re in love with my wife, say it.” Jake could hear himself asking the all-important question. He could see himself standing in the hall with the man who had selflessly intertwined his life with yours in order to make you feel less alone in the world.

“Maybe–” Jake vividly heard Jensens reply as he stood staring at the tears that fell down your cheeks. Tears he was the very cause of. “Maybe I love her, but I don’t get a chance to explore that, you do though.” 

“Me?” It was the sincerity in Jake’s voice that broke you as he put the bouquet down where he’d originally found it and made his way to sit beside you on your bed. “I want you forever and the very idea that some guy—some guy I know is a better man than I will ever be—brought you, my wife, flowers when I didn’t? Kills me.” 

“I don’t care about the flowers,” You sighed as Jake wrapped you up in his arms. 

“I know, but I let my own insecurities out in a way I never should have and I’m so sorry for the things I said. You don’t deserve that, ever.” It was genuine. The apology for his actions. Jake knew he was in the wrong with how he acted out. You could very clearly see that he was truly sorry. But letting him know that now would have been too easy. 

The pair of you sat in your hospital bed for the better half of five minutes silently enjoying each other’s presence and gentle touch. Until you broke. 

“I hope you aren’t expecting me to say apology accepted?” You smiled softly as you nuzzled into Jake’s chest a little more. Finding a comfortable position to rest in as you sunk lower in the hospital bed that wasn’t built for two fully grown human beings. 

“Nope,” Jake chuckled as he kissed the top of your head, freshly shaved and matching his own. “And I don’t think Rooster is gonna be accepting any apology I give him anytime soon, so the list is growing.” 

“What happened with Rooster?” You asked cautiously. You felt the tension take over your husband’s body as he processed what you‘d just asked. Jake held you a little tighter as he once again kissed the top of your freshly shaved head. The notes of your shampoo must have seeped into your scalp. He could still vividly smell the residual fragrance of bergamot. 

“Nothing that can’t be explained,” Jake sighed softly. He hated himself with a deep-rooted passion right now. The one thing he wanted to do more than anything else was take you home and pretend everything was alright for just one night. But he couldn’t do that. “Please, don’t worry about my mistakes when you have so much on your plate already. I’ll figure it out. Rooster and I always do.” 

“Hmm,” You replied with hesitation as you let your eyes close. The lup-dup of Jake’s heartrate soothed your soul, a heart that begged to be loved in all the ways he deserved to be loved. “I hope so. Martha Stewart’s best and closest friend said the words that sent her to prison,” You explained all the while Jake’s fingers drew unidentifiable objects into the supple skin of your forearm, careful not to mess with any of the tubes attached to you. It was grounding. “So whatever happened between you and Bradshaw I hope you fix it before he spills all your dirty little military secrets.” 

“Good thing you’re a true crime author, huh?” Jake smiled with a reluctance to give in to his biggest desire. What would be the repercussions of sneaking you out of this hospital right now? 

“No way you’re ending up in one of my books anytime soon,” You giggled softly. Jake felt his heart skip a beat at the sound of your happiness. You felt it too. The moment his heart decided it needed a second to process the laughter you let out. “I love you.” 

“I love you too, honey,” Although the circumstances said otherwise, for a second Jake felt like the luckiest guy on the planet. To be loved by you. To be the one you called home. To be the man you chose would forever be Jake’s greatest accomplishment in life. “I could live a thousand lifetimes and not deserve you in any of them.” 

************************

“No signs of life.” 

There’s a reason surgeons learn to wield scalpels. They like to pretend they’re hard, cold scientists. They like to pretend they’re fearless. But the truth is they become surgeons because somewhere, deep down, they think they can cut away that which haunts us. 

Weakness, frailty, death. 

It isn’t just surgeons. It’s paramedics too. First responders like to think they have a hand in what fate holds for you. They believe that if they can move a little quicker, stop the bleeding a little faster, and save you from life-threatening injuries, they can give you extra time. Even for just a day. 

But the truth is, we don’t know a single person who isn’t haunted by something…or someone. And whether people try to slice the pain away with a scalpel, pull someone from a car wreck, or shove it in the back of a closet…our efforts usually fail. 

So the only way we can clear out the cobwebs is to turn a new page or put an old story to rest…finally, finally…to rest. 

“Do we have any information on the victim?” Ilona shook her head as her unit chief looked around the scene. A single-car accident. The mangled wreck of twisted aluminium and shattered glass really painted a telling tale of destruction. No one could have survived the magnitude of injuries that they would have sustained on impact. 

“I’ll see if one of the guys picked up a phone or something, perhaps it’s still viable,” Ilona replied in a monotone voice. She was new to the horrors that her job sometimes brought with it. The hurricane forced winds that would sometimes knock her right off her feet. But she was learning how to work through the plethora of different emotions in a professional manner. “Poor guy, what do you think happened?” 

The black body bag laid out on the stretcher was a not-so-gentle reminder that life was a precious gift. Paramedics carried the deceased man until they were loading him into the back of the van. No sirens would be needed for this particular patient. 

“Crash investigation should have a report for us in about a week,” Taylor, the unit chief, replied as he watched the doors to the ambulance close with a thud. “We’ll need to get an ID as soon as possible to inform the family.” 

“I have a phone!!” Ilona heard the explanation from one of her co-workers. She turned with a grin on her face back to her boss. 

“We have a phone,” She repeated. “I’ll get right on it chef.” 

************************

Lydia still felt awful. She hadn’t quite shaken the existential dread that came with her almost career-ending mistake. She sat behind the desk at the nurses station just replaying the events back in her mind. How could she just assume someone to be someone’s emergency contact? 

In retrospect, Lydia now understood clear as daylight that relationships were interpersonal and held deeper value than what was on paper. Jake Seresin may not have been your emergency contact, but he sure was the love of your life. 

“You want me to do her observations?” Lydia heard one of her colleagues ask with a snicker. They all knew by this point in time what she had done. But now wasn’t the time to retreat and fall back. If she wanted to get past this, she needed to put on a brave face. 

“Nope,” Lydia shook her head as he rose to her feet. “I’ve got it,” She explained with a faux smile. “Is he not intimidating?” 

“Mr. Seresin?” Her colleague, Rebecca, replied with a mouthful of two-minute noodles she’d been scoffing down in the small window of reprieve. “Guy’s like a labrador. I mean, that is if you didn’t fuck up his wife’s chart badly enough to call the wrong person labelled clearly as an emergency contact.” 

“Ha. Ha.” Lydia barely had the time or the energy to humour her coworkers as they giggled and snickered as she made her way into your room. Jake was wide awake. He hadn’t noticed Lydia standing in the threshold of the door. But Lydia noticed how he held you with such care as you slept soundly. 

“Oh,” She cooed softly as she knocked her knuckles against the door. “Sorry to interrupt Mr. Seresin but I need to take some observations for Dr. Ignati.” 

“Would it be alright if she slept for even just five more minutes?” Jake was quick to advocate on your behalf. He could tell just how tired and overwhelmed with everything you’d become. Now that he was here and by your side, he was going to make sure you got the best possible treatment there was to offer. 

Lydia looked around at the Christmas lights that hung around your room. They twinkled and changed colour on a whim, never staying the same colour for long. The way they hung like they’d been thrown all over the place added a joyful smile across her face. 

“I’m sure I can take my time,” Lydia agreed as she approached your bedside. “How’s she been feeling?” 

“As good as you’d expect to feel given the circumstances, kid,” Jake replied with a yawn. He was able to stretch his limbs a little as he did so. Although, with every move he cautiously made, Jake was careful not to disturb you. “I assume her surgery is still going ahead as planned?” 

“As far as I’m aware,” Lydia confirmed as she checked over your chart and wrote down what she saw on your monitors. “Dr. Ignati should be around earlier in the morning to discuss everything once more.” 

“How long have you been working here?” Jake asked. He thought some small talk would be beneficial for not only him but for Lydia too. He could tell the question struck a nerve but pressed on nevertheless. “Because if I’m being perfectly honest, it doesn’t seem like very long.” 

“Eight months now,” Lydia replied with a short tone. Jake chuckled to himself as he watched her cross out what she had previously written and wrote down what she had originally intended. “Can you tell I’m also not very good at my job?” 

“It doesn’t seem out of ignorance,” Jake offered up his version of advice. “I just think you’re rushing things.” The advice didn’t fall on deaf ears like Jake thought it might. Instead, Lydia stopped what she was doing and took a nice deep long breath in. “In my line of work, things can go wrong in the blink of an eye,” Jake explained as he gently rubbed small circles into the palm of your hand with his thumb. If he was careful, he could feel the throbbing of your pulse point. “Gotta learn how to trust your instincts.” 

“My last instinct was that you were your wife’s emergency contact,” Lydia didn’t feel as if she needed to remind Jake of her biggest mistake of all time, but she did anyway. Jake understood what it was like to stay hung up on mistakes he couldn’t change. But he knew what he was about to say next would ease the burden Lydia was feeling. 

“Honestly, that’s more on me than it is on you,” Jake sighed as you stirred in his arms. He hoped you‘d stay asleep for just a little longer. You needed it. You deserved to rest soundly. 

“How so?” Lydia asked softly as went back to her duties. What Jake said to her next, however, had Lydia looking at the situation she found herself in from a different perspective. And sometimes a little perspective is all you need. 

“Well, I shouldn’t have let it get to a point where I wasn’t.” 

************************

Life gets easier when you realise that there’s no such thing as a wrong decision. Decisions are simply pivots. Each one you make will take you down a new road that will likely be both magic and miserable. Beautiful and ugly. That’s because life is a polarity. Easy doesn’t exist without hard. Good doesn’t exist without bad. 

There is no right or wrong answer. Trust that whatever decision you make can always be followed by another decision. 

“I hate this,” You mumbled as you walked to the bathroom with your IV support poll. “I already hate all of this so much.” You knew you were feeding into the depression, but you couldn’t help but feel down in the dumps about your current situation. 

“I think everything you’re feeling is valid, honey,” Jake answered as he trailed behind, giving you the independence he knew you wanted to keep but also staying close by in case you needed him. “After surgery–” Jake couldn’t even finish the sentence he’d planned to speak into existence.

“Don’t mention surgery,” You interrupted as you made your way over to the shower. “I don’t even wanna think about the surgery tomorrow.” 

“You do know that even if you ignore it, you still have to have surgery?” Jake asked as he frowned his brows and looked at you through the mirror. “We’re on the same page about that, right?” 

“What if I told you I’m just scared and don’t want anything to happen while I’m cut open like a fish?” You sassed as you looked back at Jake through the mirror. “If something happens–” 

“Hey, nothing's gonna happen,” Jake was quick to close the small gap between the two of you. He stood so close that your back pressed up against his chest. His eyes never left yours through the mirror you stood before. “I won’t let anything happen to you, or the kids for that matter.” 

“You left the kids with your mother,” You reminded your husband as he pressed his lips into a tight line of regret. “That alone is gonna cause them enough trauma Mr. ‘I won’t let anything happen to the kids’”

“You wound me, sweetheart,” Jake sighed as he tilted his head back and let out a sigh. “Besides, it’s actually you she hates, not the kids,” 

“Do you wanna help me shower or not?” You finally turned around to stand face-to-face with Jake. He was already smirking ear to ear. And it didn’t take long at all before his hands were dropping to your waist, slowly but surely making their slightly calloused way to the exposed skin of your ass. The hospital gown left little to the imagination. Jake wasn’t complaining. 

“When have I ever passed up the opportunity to see you naked?” Jake replied with a smirk you recognised was laced with lust. You felt him squeeze softly at your arse cheek playfully. “You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever laid my eyes on,” 

“You can’t help yourself, can you?” You giggled as Jake made sure to count the staples on your head. He knew whatever came next would have to be soft. It would have to be gentle and full of love. Not that it ever wasn’t full of love. 

“You drive me crazy, honey,” Jake explained as he caught your lips with his. You couldn’t help but to melt into his body as you kissed him back. Jake’s hands kneaded at the handfuls of arse he never wanted to let go of as he moaned into your mouth. 

The feeling was electric. The moan your husband let out sent shivers down your spine. It was an animalistic attraction that you’d tried so hard to suppress in your separation. But no toy on earth could satisfy you like Jake could. Not even when they were bought with his money. 

“I love you so much,” Jake cooed as he pulled back just enough to let his forehead rest against yours. “You’re gonna get through this, I promise,” He left it at that as you wrapped your arms around his waist for a much-needed hug. 

When you let go, you took a moment to drink in the sight of your husband. You stared at all the perfect little imperfections that littered his skin. The bags under his eyes were more prominent than normal. That was to be expected though. 

“Jake?” You cooed as you reached up to swipe the pad of your thumb across his lower lip. 

“I’m right here,” Jake replied as he kept his eyes closed. If he opened them he knew the tears he was trying so desperately to keep in would fall. If he cried in front of you he'd never be able to stop himself. 

“I need you to wake up for me, alright?” 

“What did you say?” Jake frowned as he opened his eyes and looked at you all confused. He knew what you said. He heard it crystal clear. But he needed you to repeat it. He needed to hear you say it again, just once. The fluorescent bathroom light flickered as he stared at you. For a second…Jake stood alone in a hospital room he didn’t recognise. Only for him to find himself standing right before you again in the blink of an eye. “Honey?” 

“I said I need you to get my phone for me?” You repeated calmly. “My phone is ringing and if I try to race to it I won't get there in time.” The explanation fit the response you gave him. Jake thought for a moment there he was going crazy. He needed more sleep, that was without a doubt the answer to his second of madness. 

Jake silently nodded in agreement before he kissed your forehead. He was only gone for a few seconds before he returned with your phone. Still ringing. 

“Who is it?” You asked as you reached out to take your phone from Jake. By the look smeared across his face, it wasn't someone he necessarily liked. 

“It’s your boyfriend,” Jake teased as he handed you your phone. Based on that comment alone you knew it was Jensen. 

“Careful Seresin,” You teased lovingly, hoping Jake believed what you had told him earlier. “He might be my next husband if you don't play your cards right.” 

Jake knew you were kidding and if anything he deserved that comeback. He didn't like the guy, that much was true. But he could see how having someone who knew what it was like to not know your own body could be beneficial to the mind. 

“You caught me at a bad time,” Jake watched as you answered the phone and held it up to your ear. “I–oh,” You paused. The immediate worry that took over the expanse of your face was enough to have the little hairs on the back of Jake's neck standing on edge. 

“Jensen Huges–” The name hung heavy in the air around you as you listened to the woman on the other end of the line. According to her, there had been a small piece of paper tucked into the phone case of this particular phone at the scene of an accident. Your name. Your number. “Oh, no, no don't tell me that,” You begged. 

Jake was unable to hear what was being said in the silence, but as he watched your eyes well with tears, he knew. 

“Y/n, give me the phone, honey,” He whispered as he gestured to your phone. You shook your head in response as you continued to listen to the woman who had introduced herself as Ilona. A police officer with the Rhode Island police. “Sweetheart?” Jake cooed as he reached out for you. The second his fingertips grazed your shoulder…You fell. “Shit–” 

“NOOOOOOO!” The guttural scream you let out scared Jake to his very core. He’d never in his life heard you sound the way you did as you crumbled on the floor in the bathroom. “NOOOOOO!” 

“Baby, baby I'm here, what happened?” Jake asked softly as he cupped your face in his hands. Your phone was long forgotten. It had crashed down when you did. “Tell me what happened so I can help you, honey?” 

“He–he left me,” You managed to gasp out between sobs. “And I can’t–I can’t breathe, Jake, I ca–” 

“Hey, I’ve got you,” Jake promised you as he held you tightly in his arms. “It’s gonna be alright,” Jake seemed to have been in the business of making promises he wasn't sure he'd be able to keep. He had no fucking idea if things would be alright. But he needed them to be. 

“I can't do this without him,” You cried out in utter anguish. “He, he was the st-strongest,” Jake could tell where this was going as you struggled to speak through your grief-stricken sobs. “If he—then I,” 

“I’ve lost count of all the rooms you've been tall in Y/n,” It broke his heart to see you like this. So full of heartbreak. So full of hopelessness. “You gotta keep fighting, I don’t know what I’ll do without you,” 

“I don't know how to!” You admitted to not only yourself but to your husband as well. “I don't know how!” 

“I’m right here, honey,” Jake held you as tight as he could on the bathroom floor. “You don't have a choice,” He explained as you cried your heart out in a way Jake had never seen you cry before. He could hear your voice echoing in his head. 

“You need to wake up,”

“You need to wake up,”

“You need to wake up,”

“Don't give up on me now Y/n, I can't lose you to this alright?” Jake felt his own tears streaming down his cheeks. The tears he no longer had the strength to fight. The way you willed yourself to wake up from this nightmare you were living broke his heart into pieces. The tears he no longer had the strength to fight. “Please, you gotta keep fighting this.” 

“He was the stronger one,” You replied as you cried yourself into a ball in Jake's arms. Clutching at his arms as your nails dug into his forearms. Grief was a funny thing. “I can't–” 

“You have to,” Jake cried with you. He was losing the love of his life and there was nothing he could do to stop this nightmare from happening. “I’m gonna be right here every step.” 

“I just want you to wake up,” It was all you said. Jake knew he heard you that time. He heard you loud and clear… “Please, don't leave me,” 

But he had no idea what you were saying. 

**********************************

Tags: @blindedbythelightt @starset21 @tayl0rhuynh @marvelogic

@itsmytimetoodream @maverick-wingman @kodzukenmaaa @eternalsams @seitmai @nota-professional

@jessicab1991 @hardballoonlove @senawashere

@withahappyrefrain @dizzybee03 @maisie-rebloging-blog

@a-reader-and-a-writer @sunlightmurdock @shelbycillian @memoriesat30

@accioprocrastination @the-aspiring-fanfic-writer @athenabarnes @eternallyvenus @emma8895eb @kmc1989

[24kmagiic]

Issued from the High Throne of the Ancients, Sealed by the Crown of Mystic Falls:

In light of the recent scandal involving Her Grace Bonnie Sheila Bennett, Duchess of the Ancient Flame and Heiress of the Bennett Dynasty, and His Grace Niklaus Mikaelson, Duke of New Orleans, and Hybrid Lord of the Ton, this decree is hereby issued to preserve the sanctity of the Social Season and the ancestral order of the realm.

Let it be recorded in the Great Book of Manna and Courtly Law and etched into the Cosmic Registers:

Any couple entering into engagement without formal matchmaking endorsement is subject to a trio of ancestral rites:

The Veilwalk — a rite of emotional truth

The Court of Truth — a magical inquisition judged by the Ancestral Council

The Unbinding Waltz — a final public display of magical and emotional harmony

Said trials shall be observed by the Crown and her appointed Magical Council. Completing all three rites shall result in formal betrothal, sanctified by crown and coven. Failure to comply or succeed shall result in:

Revocation of ancestral holdings

Public dissolution of all noble titles

Magical exile from the Court of Ancients

Eternal shame sealed by song and scroll

The trials must conclude with the Full Moon of Beltane. Any interference will be met with swift and supernatural consequences.

May the bond be true, the trials merciful, and love rise from the ashes of scandal.

Signed and Sealed,

Her Majesty, Queen Esther Mikaelson High Sovereign of Mystic Falls Keeper of the Hollow Crown

A Most Inconvenient Vow

May 4 - Arranged Marriage (ish) Queen Esther’s Manor A Week Later - Still Spring 1812 AD

“When proximity breeds a scandal, the crown demands commitment. A curious solution for an even curiouser couple…”

“As if being tethered to a Rake isn’t enough, I have to prove that I like him, too.” The disdain in Bonnie’s voice made Klaus chuckle.

“All you need to do is channel that vitriol into passion, and you’ll be fine.”

Bonnie rolled her eyes, choosing to ignore his comment. “She’s your mother, Klaus. She knows you better than anyone else. She’ll know you’re lying even if we manage to pass these ridiculous trials, which, might I add, have never been enacted, so I don’t see why we’re being singled out.”

“You said it already.” Bonnie turned to face him with a perked brow. “She’s my mother,” he smirked. “And she’s been singling me out since the world learned of her transgressions.”

Bonnie frowned. It was true. After her great ancestor Ayana cast the spell to create the Original family, the duality of Klaus’s nature was revealed. He was born of a Lycanthrope and therefore could not be the child of King Mikaelson, The Forgotten.

“Well, that isn’t fair,” Bonnie said softly. “For you or me.”

Klaus changed the subject so swiftly that Bonnie had difficulty keeping up. “The trials can be manipulated if you speak the truth,” he began. “For instance, if they ask about your undying affections for me, you can say something along the lines of how you can’t stand to breathe the same air as me, yet you always manage to get lost in my eyes,” he said, batting his eyelashes. He pinched her cheek, quickly pulling away when she lit his glove on fire.

Bonnie giggled as he struggled to dispose of the charred garment. She watched as his fingers healed with supernatural precision. He removed the other glove and threw it at her, which she also burned in mid-air.

“I’ve never gotten lost in your eyes,” she lied.

“Lying isn’t very becoming of you, Lady Bennett.”

“And yet you’ve put me in a position where I have to lie at least thrice!” She huffed and squared her shoulders. “Let’s get on with it. The sooner we complete them, the sooner we can live in banishment.”

“Together? I have stowaway houses scattered throughout the kingdom. You’d want for nothing, all I ask is that you—”

“If you finish that statement, I will burn your arse alive,” she snapped.

Klaus held up a hand and chuckled. “As you command it, My Fair Lady. Come. Night is approaching, and the trials wait for no one.” He offered his arm to her, a simple act that made her heart falter slightly. He was gracious enough not to tease her if he heard it, and for that, she was thankful.

“They emerged hand-in-hand… but the Veil saw what even they would not admit.”

The silver glow of moonlight bathed the Ancestral Grove in its glory. She and Niklaus had walked there together, but now, they faced the veil alone. She glanced to her left and watched him from across the Garden as he entered the veil without hesitation and exhaled deeply before taking the plunge.

The mist was thick and teeming with ancestral energy. Her eyes frosted, a ghostly white hue as the physical world melted away, replaced by the mystical energy of the ancestral plane. The blinding white glow faded into something softer as ghostly figures began to take shape before her.

It was her. A version of herself, not much older than she was currently. She watched as visions of life flashed before her eyes. It showed her surviving the trials, navigating a very public ‘break up’ with the Hybrid Rake, and then living a life of duty. Peaceful, reserved. Fullfilled…

But not happy, she noticed.

The feeling of ‘what if’ lingered in the center of her chest, but the visions began to shift before she could contemplate it.

Before her now was a joyful Bonnie, filled with light, love, and laughter. There was a spark in her eyes that was missing from before. And more importantly, she felt fulfilled. True fulfillment that didn’t come from her duties as a witch or the burdens that came with being the ‘last of her name’. She felt certainty.

And then she saw him. The Hybrid, The Rake, the Bane of her existence. Laughing alongside her. She should have been shocked. Should have turned her nose up in disgust. Instead, she felt… familiarity. The same vitriol present whenever he was near was no longer masked with feigned disgust. It was unfiltered, unapologetic.

It felt freeing.

Bonnie’s eyes stung with unshed tears as the visions began to fade. She blinked several times before her eyes landed on a young boy, no more than twelve. Alone beneath a full silver moon, wrecked with emotion and soaked in blood. The sight made her falter. She approached him slowly and knelt before him.

When she spoke, her voice didn’t come from her throat but her mind, and somehow he heard her. 

“What is the matter?” she asked. The boy lifted his head, his face tear-stained, his expression distraught.

“It’s my fault. I caused this.” She knew that voice. It wasn’t that of a boy. It was that of an eight-hundred-year-old hybrid. Her breath caught as she stared into the young boy’s eyes—the same eyes she’d been accused of getting lost in. She saw the regret, the vulnerability, the disgust he held toward himself. Her heart ached.

She gasped as everything faded to black, stumbling back when she was ejected from the mist. She fell against Niklaus with a soft thud, who stood behind her with an amused expression. He helped her regain her footing before glancing over her shoulder.

“What did you see that made you overstay your welcome?”

She had a hard time adjusting to reality. Rather than answer him, she gripped his shirt, clinging to a version of him that did not exist in this realm. A version she didn’t wish to let go of just yet.

Niklaus’s smile faltered briefly, noting her haunted expression. His ears twitched at the sound of her racing heart and noted how she clenched his shirt. He quieted. Rather than tease her, he simply let her be, allowing her time to adjust—allowing her to use him as her anchor.

“What happened?” She finally whispered, staring not at him but through him.

He nearly answered before he knew what he was saying, even though he wasn’t sure exactly what she meant. Yet somehow, he knew she was speaking beyond their current predicament.

What happened to you, she wanted to say, but caught herself just in time.

“I think Grandma Bonnie has been out too late. Let’s get you back to your chambers before you crack like a nut,” he teased, though he wasn’t sure if it was for her sake or his.

Bonnie remained silent, allowing him to guide her back to her quarters in silence. She needed to pull herself together.

But when they arrived and he turned to leave, she couldn’t help but ask: “What did you see?”

It was brave of her to ask, knowing she wasn’t ready to share what she’d seen. But she needed to know. He seemed so… unbothered, and it was unnerving her.

The vulnerability in her eyes caught him off guard, and every witty remark he had rehearsed was swallowed in an instant. “Just a girl, sorry—a woman—trying to survive the best way she knows how.”

For whatever reason, his answer didn’t feel good enough.

The two of them stood in silence before Bonnie scoffed softly. “So, a mess,” she teased at her own expense. The urge to correct her surged within him, but the moment slipped before he could seize it. “Goodnight, Niklaus,” she said softly before disappearing behind the oak door.

He stood there silently for a moment before vanishing into thin air. Bonnie lingered by the window, watching the spot he’d once occupied before blowing out her candle. Two more days and she’d be free from this, she hoped.

Or did she…

“Pretend all you like, Your Graces—this author knows true spark when she sees it.”

The Court of Truths would be the most intimidating of the trials, or so the Duchess thought. Their truths laid bare wouldn’t have been such a distressing thought if they hadn’t entered this predicament by lying through their teeth.

Bonnie sat nervously outside the Ancestral Court, waiting to be summoned. She was a wreck and what’s worse? Niklaus wasn’t saying a word.

No witty remarks, no dazzling charm, nothing. Only the pensive expression he’d worn since earlier that morning when he picked her up. “They’ll ask a series of questions,” he finally spoke, his tone more serious than she was used to. Still, she clung to every word, desperate to escape her ruthless ruminations.  “Answer them as honestly as you can, but keep it short. Less is more.” 

“You wouldn’t happen to know the questions, do you?” Her tone was so hopeful he nearly laughed.

“We are the first couple ever to have to go through this, so no, Bonnie, I don’t know what the questions are,” he snapped, though there was no real ire in his tone. Bonnie recognized what he was doing instantly. It was a lifeline—a means to help her release the nervous energy currently holding her hostage.

She immediately jumped on it.

“Well, forgive my asking. You’re what? Nine hundred years old, and your mother’s the queen. Silly of me to think you’d actually know something.”

“Eight hundred and thirty-one, and I know nothing, just like you.”

“You don’t look a day past a thousand.”

“And I’ll never reach it if you keep talking me to death.”

The door swiftly opened, signaling it was time to enter. She wasn’t sure when he’d grabbed her hand, but she didn’t fight it. The pair walked in sync, presenting a good front to the spectral eyes following their movements. The Ancestral Court was more of an amphitheater. A dark corridor led them to the open area. There were no walls, no ceiling, no confinement. Just vast openness meant to intimidate. They moved to the center of the theater, where the bright violet and gold floor immediately glowed—the Bennett and Mikaelson crest colors. 

Each of Bonnie’s steps created a violet trail to the center, and she stared in awe at the golden steps following Klaus. She looked into the hillside where the spectral figures of their ancestors sat, waiting and observing. Though she couldn’t make out their specific faces, she felt a familial bond emanating from each one.

As she stared in awe, Klaus remained fixed beside her with an almost bored expression. She brushed the back of his hand with her thumb to gain his attention, nearly flinching when his gaze burned through her. Her mouth went dry, and the words died on her lips. What she planned to say was long forgotten, and to her relief, a loud, genderless voice spoke. The voice came from everywhere around them, making it hard to pinpoint the source.

“Do you come with love in your heart, and truth on your tongue?” The voice asked.

Bonnie exhaled slowly, answering first. “I do,” she said, hoping her voice didn’t betray her. Thankfully, the question was vague enough for her to mean it.

Niklaus nodded, “I do.” 

Bright flames traveled around the circle they stood in, trapping them both. Bonnie could only assume that the fire would subside once the trials were completed and tried not to think of what would happen if they failed.

“Then let the Truth be summoned. Let what you hide be laid bare. Let what you deny be spoken aloud. Let what you fear be faced.”

A surge of magic filled the air, thick and humming. The ground between them illuminated with ancestral runes, and a tether of light flared from Klaus’s chest to Bonnie’s—and another from Bonnie’s to Klaus’s.

Bonnie winced as her heart rate accelerated. She could feel him and was sure he could feel her too. She didn’t like the sensation of being read. She felt exposed in ways she’d never experienced.

Klaus, to his credit, did not smirk.

The voice returned. “Duchess Bonnie Bennett… what do you desire most?”

Bonnie froze at the loaded question. How on Earth was she supposed to answer that? When she parted her lips to speak, a golden mist flowed from her chest and swirled above them.

The image it created knocked the wind out of her.

It was him. Not the Hybrid Rake she loathed but a gentler version of him. A softer side she’d seen in the Veilwalk. A version she’d made up. He laughed beside her in the vision, kissed the inside of her wrist, and held her in a garden at midnight.

Bonnie’s heart stopped.

Gasps rang out from the invisible audience seated beyond the spectral veil. From beside her, Klaus’s breath caught. Bonnie’s face flushed two shades darker.

“Wait—” Bonnie began, horrified. Her chest twisted with emotion. “That isn’t—I didn’t—”

But the vision didn’t lie. It never did. The truth had been summoned, not spoken, and couldn’t be manipulated like they’d planned.

At the revelation, her heart rate accelerated tenfold, and she closed her eyes, hoping the ground would swallow her whole.

The voice pressed on. “Duke Niklaus Mikaelson… what do you fear most?”

Klaus’s jaw locked. His chest rose sharply as the light pulled from him, unwillingly.

A violet mist flowed from his chest, hovering in the space above them. A spectral version of herself appeared, following Niklaus through the woods. When he turned to face her, his face was distorted. Not the man he presented at court, but the beast who feasted at night. The one she’d heard stories about. The one mothers warned their little girls about at bedtime.

Bonnie watched as the spectral version of herself ran away from the monster, horrified by what she’d seen. In the vision, Niklaus reached for her as she left in an almost heartbreaking way, yet even as she ran, there was no hatred in her eyes, just sadness and disappointment.

Bonnie couldn’t look away—not from the monster, but from the man who feared she’d see it… and leave.

She felt Klaus flinch before the vision disappeared.

“Do either of you deny these truths?” the voice asked.

Klaus swallowed, hesitating momentarily before stepping forward to place much-needed distance between them.

Bonnie ignored how his warmth left her exposed to the coolness of the air surrounding them and tried not to follow him. She wasn’t sure when his closeness shifted from irritation to comfort, but she opted not to question it.

“No,” he finally said.

Bonnie’s voice cracked as she spoke. “No.”

“Then you may proceed to the next trial. But know this—it is not love you must perform, but the truth you must survive.”

The trial ended with the ancient runes of their family crests intertwining on the floor below them. Golds and Violets mixed until they formed a new sigil—a Bennett-Mikaelson crest.

Bonnie felt her insides twist with unspeakable emotions. It wasn’t just a crest. It was a destiny neither of them had asked for, and one they could no longer unsee.

The light faded, and the flames stilled, yet Klaus and Bonnie remained motionless. They were too exposed to move or even look at one another. 

Bonnie was the first to break the silence.

“…You’re afraid I’ll leave?” It wasn’t exactly what she intended to say, but she was too curious to take it back.

Klaus didn’t answer immediately, and at one point, she was afraid he wouldn’t answer at all. “I’m afraid you’ll see me clearly… and decide I’m not worth staying for.”

Bonnie stared at him wordlessly. The court had stripped her raw, revealing one undeniable truth: this was no longer a facade.

He wasn’t playing anymore.

And neither was she.

Her chest heaved, the weight of the realization gnawing at her. “You think I haven’t already seen you?” she whispered.

“Not all of me.”

Klaus met her eyes, his intense gaze making her squirm as it always had. Yet, for the first time, she didn’t look away.

And neither did he.

His hand twitched as he instinctively moved to grab her hand, yet he faltered. Instead, he stepped ahead, creating more distance between them. Bonnie felt the familiar pang of rejection. The same one she’d felt that night. The night that sealed their fates.

She watched him walk away, but didn’t follow. Not because she didn’t want to, but because she was afraid of what might come if she did.

“A most inconvenient vow, indeed. And yet… how quickly inconvenience becomes desire.”

Find the 2nd installment here...

Find the 4th & final installment here...

[xclowniex]

Honestly, this anti-Jewish behavior is incredibly upsetting even to a non-Jewish person like me. It's like ever since it all started, I've been seeing people who I thought were sane individuals just frankly start acting absolutely bonkers, completely disregarding every bit of their better selves for the sake of something that they frankly barely seem to understand to begin with.

It's like a fucking switch just got flipped, and suddenly I'm dealing with a complete hateful stranger wearing an acquaintance's face.

I'm frankly finding myself wanting to keep myself as far away as possible from them, because they're so completely enamored, even gleefully indulgent, of this hateful behavior (and because they don't really listen when me or others try to get them back to Earth), and it's utterly spine-chilling and disturbing.

It reminds me far too much of the madness of QAnon. It shouldn't be like this; we can hate the bad things, the atrocities and war crimes that Israel's leadership and Hamas have done without turning into xenophobic assholes against people who are being harmed by both, and yet it seems like far too many people desperately crave to be the latter.

Yeah

There are so many parts to the issue of the rise in antisemitism. One part is that so many people on the left were just frothing at the mouth to have a reason to be antisemitic in a socially acceptable way. Another is that jews have always been a scapegoat for all problems and of course that hasn't changed.

There is a nickname for those who exhibit qanon behavior as its become a more popular than before. The nickname is Panon.

It's crazy how many people would call out people who did their own shitty research when it came to covid yet they do the same with i/p.

I have a vivid memory of when I was 16 or 17 having to correct one of my goyische friends about the stuff they would post on their Instagram story and they would listen and take it down, but it got to the point where I couldn't be arsed continously correcting them.

And like you said, it is absolutely wild how saying both Israel's leadership and Hamas have committed war crimes and done bad things.

The nuance which the left used to be known for has simply left the room

[daemon-in-my-head]

I was once again reminded of one of the Hunger Games core msgs; "Who do you hate more, the atrocities or the people who commit them against you" and while I don't want to derail the OPs great post it does remind me of Gortash and Durge.

Gortash doesn't hate the atrocities. He committed them himself. He hates Raphael and his parents but not what they did to him by itself, and that is precisely why he can't break the cycle and won't ever attain that true freedom he longs for. He's a self-fulfilling prophecy in that regard. His warped view allows him to continue committing these atrocities and shift the blame from himself or the atrocities themselves onto others. That whole "lesser evil" thing I've talked abt before.

And perhaps that's also what irks me so much about the Durge conclusion. Because yes, sometimes you need violence to end the violence, but usually the people who commit these acts remember how they were wronged and come to realise that the act itself is the issue and not the people behind it—but for Durge, as is presented in-game, it very much feels like a personal vendetta against Orin rather than them recognising that the acts committed against them were wrong. I mean, fuck they don't remember what happened to them, so how the hell are they meant to realise, as the blank slate they are, how vile Bhaals actions were and how wrong it is for this shit to happen to anybody. Like there's a dissonance there, and yes, I suppose the character itself seeks to answer the question of "nature vs nurture", but like they don't fucking remember the nurture or nature. It's like telling an anti-war story but not talking about the war itself. You can obv do it, but it sucks, there are loopholes everywhere, and the message is buried between fuck all and harder to recognise. You can do it, but it's a shit way of doing it.

Tldr; it's half arsed. What I am saying is the Durge story is half arsed, they should've committed to it rather than make it comedic horror relief. And I love that story, mind you. But still half arsed.

And on a more personal level, I think that may also be what contributed to me creating Fine and him being how he is. Cuz he can't remember the atrocities. He knows smth happened, but he doesn't truly remember, and instead, his hatred is directed solely towards Bhaal. And while he isn't directly inflicting those atrocities on others after some point, he still doesn't consider them wrong or worse, and instead, despite feeling utter hatred for him, he ends up sympathising with some of the shit Bhaal did. He, too, is a self-fulfilling prophecy in that regard cuz he hates Bhaal and the Gods more than what they did, so he inadvertently ends up trapped in the same cycle yet again and eventually becomes incapable of truly breaking it. Because he, too, failed to realise where the actual issue lies. Which I'll gladly dive into in a different post cuz Durges response, the lack thereof, and all that comes with would derail this too much and it's a very very personal hc aka just shit i put my oc thru. Eitherway, my point stands.

[splonkblonk]

the worst part about being Australian is that someone is going to make fun of you no matter how you say the word "ass"

say it like an American? the worst possible sin one could commit, Australians pride themselves on not being American

say it like "arse"? what are you, a posh aristocrat? why do you sound like that?

it's the worst possible lose/lose and I'm constantly facing this issue, the word is far too deep in my lexicon for me to just avoid saying it

[duskstargazer]

Content warning // character death, explicit character death, potentially gruesome imagery

[1996]

The two engines greeted their visitor cheerfully.

“Welcome to the Sodor Steelworks!” Harry smiled.

“Where yesterday's loss is-”

“No.”

“Where yesterday's old wheel is tomorrow's new steel!” Bert grinned.

Harry sighed.

“Are you two done mucking around?” The engine grunted. “I haven't got all day. My railway is expecting me back by morning, and I have no desire to keep my director waiting.”

“'Your railway’?” Bert asked.

“Yes. A preservation line out East, near the Southern Region.”

‘So not a Sodor Engine’, the two diesels thought in unspoken chorus. He didn't know it, but the Steelworks’ visitor had just made a grave mistake by giving Harry and Bert an inch.

“I'll get to sortin’ yer train.” Bert offered. “It's gonna take a bit though, I'm not that fast.”

“Or if ya don't wanna wait for Bert's slow arse to sort yer train,” Harry offered, “I can show you where you can leave it.”

“Sounds fine to me.”

Harry rolled backwards towards the Smelting Shed, leaving the visitor to follow.

“You seem quite committed to your work, huh?” Harry struck up conversation with the engine as they made their way to the back.

“You could say that.”

“Your railway must rely quite heavily on such a dedicated engine.”

“Someone has to take up the strain, after that coward decided the work was too much for him and left without a trace.”

“Oh?”

“It was a while back, but an engine I worked with back in the Southern Region just- ow!”

A sudden blunt force slammed into the train, causing several trucks to derail and the flatbeds in front to jackknife.

“Y'don't see that kinda behavior from trucks.” Harry mused. “Though they are known for causin’ trouble. Wait here.”

Harry strode briskly away, leaving their guest standing next to a huge smoking box.

“What…is that?” The engine wondered aloud.

He would soon get his answer. A sudden slam made him jump. He looked back to see the derailed flatbeds undisturbed, but a massive gate had shut between them and the rest of the train.

A whirring sounded above him. The engine looked up, and his eyes widened. A large grabber was slowly descending towards him.

“Wait- no. Stop!” He shouted. “I'm here to deliver your scrap metal! I- I'm not for scrap! I'M NOT FOR SCRAPPING!! LISTEN TO ME, DAMN YOU!! STOP THIS! YOU CAN'T-!”

[ / ]

Harry and Bert met in the main building, at the tail end of the train.

“Excellent work, Bert.” Harry chuckled, as he pulled up alongside his partner in crime.

“Couldn'ta beguiled‘'im like you did.” Bert replied.

“Nah, y'just gotta commit to the act. Anyone can feign interest for a couple minutes er so.”

“I ‘ave fer years, 'n’ you've never caught on.”

“Screw you.” Harry laughed.

A piercing howl emanated from within the smelting shed, no longer one of pleas or threats, but raw, unfiltered terror.

A sickening crunch turned the screams into a feeble, hollow groan. Then silence.

“I still hate the ‘slogan’ you came up with.” Harry grunted.

“It's fitting.”

“Doesn't make it good.”

The two grumbled at each other as they set to work rerailing the trucks, ready to be sorted in the sidings.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Apologies for the delayed post, technical issues I couldn't sort out from my phone :\

[pain-in-the-riri]

Same Old Fire

Sirius/Remus, Explicit, 8k, Illustrated!!!!

Sirius gently banged his forehead against the cold glass of Remus's bedroom window for the umpteenth time. He didn't have a watch, but he'd guess he had been out here for thirty minutes. Maybe an hour, god, it felt like ages. He briefly considered the possibility that he'd lost all sense of time and had been standing out here for years, his skin prickling with the cold and his boots squishily attempting not to smother Remus's mother's newly budding daffodils in the mud. He thought, perhaps it would have been wise to wear a watch because the decades he was spending in this garden were beginning to feel unbearable.

That's not even to mention the hours — nine of them — that it took to get from the center of London to Glasgow on a motorcycle that seemed determined to undermine him at every step, and left him having to pull a detour halfway through the journey in search of a replacement tyre in Who-Knows-Where, England, as well as some replacement patience, which was unfortunately harder to get a hold of.

He banged his forehead against the window again. It was a delicate balance. He needed to strike just the correct pitch and tone of knock to wake up Remus two days post-full moon while simultaneously not waking up his parents (or anyone else in the neighborhood, ideally). Frankly, there was also the minor issue of whether Remus was in his bedroom to begin with, something that, if at this point turned out not to be the case, would lead Sirius to committing unspeakable crimes. He was fairly certain he was in there. Where else would he be? It made the most sense.

This time he let his head roll back on his shoulders, groaned in frustration at the sky, and knocked at a medium volume with his knuckles.

"Moooooon—ouch, fuck!" He yanked his hand back as the window slid open and raked his knuckles against the lip. He put his sore knuckle into his mouth but grinned around it at the sight of the familiar lanky torso hovering in the darkness inside of the room. In the moonlight, he could just make out the Patti Smith logo on his T-shirt, and, more obviously, the exhausted demeanor of his posture. "Moony! Fucking finally, do you know how long I've been out here?! I was about to give up." Maybe in another half hour.

"Sirius?" Remus's voice sounded rough with sleep, surprised. "What are you…how did you know I was—?"

"Would you let me in, I'm freezing my arse off." Sirius said, and turned around to pick a helmet and two brightly wrapped presents from the grass behind him. He shoved them through the open window into Remus's arms.

Keep reading on AO3

[piratefalls]

i'm sure everyone's tired of my rambling at the beginning of these, so let's just get to it. new list every wednesday!

list one. list two.

Even If It's Just Pretend by nontoxic

“The queen wants to show that the Prince and the First Son are still deeply in love and committed to their countries.” Ellen swallows. “They want you to go on a tour of the Commonwealth together, to get the public to see those emails not as a sex scandal, but an invasion of privacy of a wholesome, loving relationship.” “It was an invasion of privacy,” Alex says. He swallows. “Did they say what would happen if we say no?” Ellen’s lips pinch tightly at the corners. “Then they will issue a full denial and Henry will tour the commonwealth himself.” Alex doesn't hesitate. “Tell them we’ll do it. I’m not gonna let him do this alone." It would kill him. Henry hates this shit. The public parading, the judgment. Having to do all of that, and deny who he is? Alex at least wants to be there, to hold his hand through it. Even if it's just as a friend. It might kill Alex to pretend, but that’s a small price to pay to ensure Henry—his beautiful, vibrant, funny-as-hell, brilliant ex-not-quite-boyfriend—isn’t killed instead. --- or, the alex-never-goes-to-kensington-after-the-lake-house, exes-to-fake-dating-to-lovers fic.

I've carried this song in my mind by kiwiana

Henry lays eyes on Alex Claremont-Diaz for the first time in Rio, and it sends such a shockwave of longing and terror into the universe that Arthur feels it. Or, five times Arthur tries to get Alex and Henry together from beyond the grave, and one time two times his intervention isn’t needed.

Bear with me by phlebotinxm

The first time it happened, Henry was not having it. “For the last time, I’m not helping you shave your arse.�� — In which Alex is very hairy, and Henry sort of has a thing for it. Not that he'd admit it, though.

Taking Control of the Histories by Qwert33

Singer ACD and Prince Henry announce their engagement to each other. The internet reacts. (+ the months after, a new album, resurfacing of old interviews, and public online flirting.)

Lost and Found by milowren

Pez turns to hand him his ticket, raising an eyebrow over one of his unsettling blue eyes. “It’s either too terrifying for you or too juvenile. It can’t be both.” “I’m not terrified,” Henry says sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. But as soon as the crowd in front of them clears and he’s able to see the entrance to the maze, he’s forced to recant that statement. Because standing just off to the side in the shadow of a giant inflatable jack-o-lantern, along with two girls that Henry vaguely recognizes through their costumes, is the most terrifying thing Henry has seen so far tonight. Alex Claremont-Diaz. ****** Alex and Henry are coworkers, Henry has a crush, and they end up at a haunted corn maze together a few nights before Halloween. Shenanigans ensue! Plus many horror movie references.

you handle it beautifully by HypnosTheory

“And I may have an idea for the libido problem too.” Henry sighs. “I don’t think this has risen to the level of therapy just because I can’t get hard.” “First off, nothing has to rise to the level of therapy, there’s no threshold for misery,” Alex says, parroting the words his therapist has told him about half a million times. “But no, I wasn’t thinking about therapy.” Henry raises a brow. “I was thinking we try party drugs.” - Alex, discovering Henry is having a hard time getting out of his head enough to enjoy sex, has a clear solution: recreational drug use! While on the road to self-discovery and self-actualization, Henry surprises Alex more than once. (3 times Henry surprised Alex + 1 time Alex shocked him right back)

Thirst Tweets & Mean Tweets [FOR APPROVAL] by loveonpurpose

MEMO: Official Transcript of Alex Claremont-Diaz and HRH Henry Fox-Mountchristen-Windsor for BuzzFeed, Inc. Original video title: "Prince Henry Reads Thirst Tweets / FSOTUS Reads Mean Tweets" (2021). Filmed February 20, 2021. Approval status: PENDING This transcript is strictly confidential and may contain privileged and proprietary information, which is protected under applicable laws and intended solely for the use of The White House and Buckingham Palace.

in the shadow of two gunmen by matherine

There are over four hundred and thirty-three million guns in civilian possession in the United States. Alex isn’t sure where on the campaign trail that fact embedded itself into his brain — he thinks he picked it up from some memo between Minnesota and Missouri — but he’s never been able to forget it. It's one of those things he turns over and over in his head, running the numbers as if he could calculate the possibility of a bullet embedding itself in his brain. In the end, Alex thinks that it evens out. More people want to kill him than the average person (and that number has grown exponentially over the years) but now he also has Secret Service protection and can’t go anywhere without a motorcade. So, really, statistically, he figures that he has just as much of a chance of being shot by one of those 433 million firearms as anyone else, give or take a few decimal points here and there. But doing the math doesn’t make it any less terrifying when it actually happens.

Want you stealing my time by clottedcreamfudge

Henry has no idea what the rules are meant to be when you fall in love with your best friend thirty seconds after befriending them, but he supposes it doesn't matter anyway; he knows that Alex could never feel the same way - has always known that - and he considers himself lucky to have someone this fierce and full of life in his corner. He doesn't need more, no matter how much he may want it. Then Alex goes and ruins everything by daring to press him against the wall at a party and kiss him like his life fucking depends on it.

simply, don't by rizcriz

The first voicemail notification sits in Henry’s inbox when he lands in London. He stares at it for a long while before quietly dismissing it and shoving his phone unceremoniously into his pocket. His phone feels like lead in his pocket the entire ride back to the palace, fingers itching to pull it out and just listen. But he’s stronger than that, isn’t he? He left, he got on the plane, he made it home without once looking back. He had, though, contemplated the many steps it would take to turn around. Wondered if he could make it back with enough time to climb back into Alex’s bed and pretend none of this nightmare—the confession of love—had ever happened. But for every step he envisions himself taking back, three more lead him straight to Kensington Palace, because for whatever it is that he wants, there is only what he can have, and it is not a life with one Alexander Gabriel Claremont-Diaz. -- Or, Henry actually answers one of Alex's calls.

heart & home by railmedaddy

An exploration of life, love, friendship and family – one snippet for each week of Alex & Henry’s first year in their brownstone.

the love of my life, forever by coffeecatsme

“So,” the host of the talk show starts, eyes glimmering with excitement as he gazes at Alex over the desk, “your new single. I think anyone here would agree that it felt like a death by a thousand cuts, listening to those lyrics. If you don’t mind me asking… There’s been a lot of speculation online about who the song is about.” Alex flips his curls to the other side, trying not to smile. “Uh huh.” Or, 5 times the media speculates Alex is dating someone else and 1 time they realize he's been with Henry all this time.

You Can't Deny Me Anything by Dawg1515

“What happened?” Henry frowns deeply and presses his hand to Alex’s forehead. “You’re burning up, love.” Or: That night at the Lake House, Henry is getting ready to leave when Alex wakes up feeling sick. Faced with memories of losing his father, Henry decides to stay and take care of Alex. They have some things to talk out.

sparks fly (whenever you smile) by cxpbuck

When Alex wakes up after a particularly alcohol-filled night, he’s surprised by a blonde stranger in his bed. What’s more surprising, however, are all the messages on his phone congratulating his engagement to said blonde stranger.

how to have (normal) friends without fucking it up by ohgaywarden

Alex y’all are forgetting i started in georgetown when my mom was elected at least it’s not like the white house where they’ll bring the dogs out to sniff for weed cash and the ppos will probably check you for stuff but yeah… just don’t bring anything that would alert the royal protectors of the 4th in line for the throne Abbylol Anthony okay :) what time? -- Alex tries to make friends in law school.

a thousand, a million, billion thoughts, (all under the form of a letter to you) by CrayolaRainbow

Henry has been working on something in his office for the past week. Every time Alex asks him what it is, Henry just brushes him off with a simple “It’s a project, dear, nothing to worry about,” before throwing himself back into his work. He comes back, a week later, with a proposal he wants to show Alex. Or: Henry proposes to Alex with the help of a list, a powerpoint presentation, and some Very Gay Quotes.

buzzing by demigodbeautiies

“I mean, I respect the guts of anyone who thinks it’s a good idea to send a vibrator to the Prince of Wales,” Alex said, staring down at the little egg shaped thing in a box on their counter. “I can’t ever endorse this,” he replied, finally. -- Henry and Alex are sent a remote control vibrator. They find many, many uses for it.

A Tapestry of Intimacy Unfolded by Hqwhna

It's a case of textbook serendipity when Senator Alex Claremont-Diaz and Dr. Henry Fox first meet at a fundraiser in D.C. Now, Alex just has to think of an excuse to see him again...

Going Platinum by cricketnationrise

Email: austincamz@gmail.com Channel Name: AustinBoy Age Restricted?: 18+ Chat enabled?: Yes Subscriptions: Monthly Tiers: 2 Tier 1:> Name: Standard > Description: Access to chat room, 1 weekly video Tier 2:> Name: Bonus > Description: Access to chat room, 1 weekly video, 1 weekly livestream

Or, a Camboy!Alex AU

A Taste of You by everwitch

On a few, select occasions, Henry has indulged Alex’s flirty banter, meeting Alex halfway with his own brand of dry wit. That is hardly advisable, of course, but Henry is only… well, not human exactly, but once upon a time he was, and sometimes he likes to reminisce about that. To recall what that existence had felt like. To watch a pretty young thing with a certain spark in his eyes smile victoriously when Henry admits he’s handsome. When Henry lets Alex take him home, he thinks he’s the only one who’s about to reveal his true nature. He’s wrong.

Hit (My Love) Out of the Park by bleedingballroomfloor

“It’s just — I’ve had such a hard time feeling like I really belonged. I think that’s what got me in the slump in the first place. But coming back here, seeing all the love I still got even though I’m not on the Rangers anymore… that really helped. And being on the Mets, being in New York — you helped with all of that. More than you’ll ever know.” Or, Alex and Henry are dumb, horny disasters. With an added bonus of baseball.

Engagement by SilverRosesAndDragons

Alex and Henry get engaged. They make a show of telling the world.

hear it in the silence (feel it on the way home) by orionseye

“It drives me nuts sometimes that you don’t get to have more say in your life. When I picture you happy, I see you with your own apartment somewhere outside of the palace and a desk where you can write anthologies of queer history. And I’m there, using up your shampoo and making you come to the grocery store with me and waking up in the same damn time zone with you every morning.” - page 296 Henry and Alex get everything they want after the 2020 elections: a beautiful home, fulfilling careers, a life together. But you need to heal first, to be able to love.

Sweetheart Grips by orestespdf

“Is this a good time to say that I haven’t done this before either, and that you should also tell me if it’s terrible?” Henry asks. Alex lets out a quiet laugh. His cheeks are ruddy with pleasure, the way some people get flushed when they’ve been smiling a while. Henry wants to do everything in his power to make Alex laugh again. The sound is intoxicating. “Sure thing, sweetheart,” Alex says with an easy grin. "I’ll log any complaints accordingly.” --- Rewriting a few RWRB sex-scenes with trans!Alex.

Hold the Moonlight In Your Hands by absolute-worst-idea (cxptained)

“Come on.” Henry tells him, tugging him to his feet and suddenly time is repeating itself. They sneak through the long grass, past the same PPO’s that snooze by the front door, before taking off at a run down that very same pier. “What are you doing?” Alex yells out, laughing as they come to the same halt as before, right under the brilliant night sky. The same stars look down on them. The same moon lights up their path, lights up Henry’s face, lights up his eyes and his smile. “I’m doing this right!” Henry says. There’s a lightness to his voice, a sparkle in perfect blue hues and Alex’s chest lifts just as it had done a year ago. ---------- The group find themselves back at the lake house, and Henry wants to make right that disastrous night with a marriage proposal that will change Henry and Alex's lives forever.

my gift is my song/and this one's for you by HestiaForever

It still amazes Henry, sometimes. That Alex loves him back; that the whole world knows and it’s okay. He turns his head and kisses Alex gently. The frizzing anxiety in his veins settles, and it’s like taking a breath of fresh air. Alex breaks away to smile against his lips. “Just like old times, huh? Do I need to let you go flee the country now?” OR Alex and Henry’s relationship, told through five holidays over five years.

The Red Side Goes Up by cmere

Henry brings home a little something new to try in the bedroom. Or: The One Where Alex Gets Jealous of a Butt Plug.

One Wild and Precious Life by SprigsofViolets

In 2015, Arthur Fox was diagnosed with cancer. He went into surgery to have a tumor removed from his brain, and fell into a coma. Nine years later, he wakes up.

Imagine Being Loved By Me by ladybonehollows

“Please tell me you're not so high in your ivory tower that you don't know what fanfiction is and that people write it about you." He can practically hear the sound of Henry rolling his eyes through the phone. “No, I know what it is, and I wish I could be surprised to learn that people have written it about me. None of that has ever inspired me to go looking for it.” Alex looks gleefully at the page in front of him. “Oh baby, I love how we can still surprise each other," he says. "I'm skipping to the good part, though.”

But Then You Found Me (And Everything Changed) by Lily_Padd_23, supernatural_mondler

Henry accidentally asks a question. Alex is more than ready with the answer.

if you want to be tagged in future lists, let me know!

[heavywoolcoat]

[pettyrevenge-base]

No you can't have new years eve off.

So I started a new job this year and up until recently I've genuinely been enjoying it. There's some colleagues I've bonded with really well with and I'm actually really good at what I do. I work in primary care for the NHS (UK) and patients are always telling me how helpful and how kind I am. Since I joined in January, 6 patients have bought me chocolates/flowers by way of a thank you for fixing certain problems for them. For the first time in a really long time I feel like I've found some sort of calling. As lame as that sounds. But recently my days have become increasingly difficult.

4 months into my employment my colleague (let's call her Trish) who trained me up had to take some time out for a health issue so I spent 3 months basically doing the job without her, and at times it was incredibly stressful being the only person able to perform the job. Admittedly there was maybe one or two days it was too much and I had to run off for a small cry before getting back out there. However, eventually ended up taking it in my stride and thus gained praise and respect from colleagues and patients alike. But when it was said Trish was coming back I was relieved because I thought it would give me a bit more breathing room. I was wrong.

Now I'll preface all of this by saying that Trish isn't particularly well liked. She's known for being blunt to the point of cruelty both to patients and coworkers, she's snappy, and rude to pretty much everyone. There's negative comments regarding her on Google fir crying out loud. She's had umpteen complaints against her but they keep her around as she's worked there for around 20+ years. When she went on leave, granted I didn't know her that well, but we got on well and in spite of everyone bad mouthing her behind her back or making snarky comments when she went into a different room, I stood up for her. No one was particularly overjoyed she was coning back from leave other than me.

For the first few days she was back she went straight back to trying to "train" me in spite of the fact I'd been doing everything solo since her absence. Which rubbed me up the wrong way a little but I ignored it. The last time I saw her I was still regularly asking questions. So that's fair enough. But even though she could see I was quite capable and competent she kept talking to me like a moron so I had to be quite blunt with her and tell her I'd been doing the job by myself perfectly well with 0 help from her or anyone so I didn't need to be "refreshed" with training.

Since then (July) the relationship has soured somewhat. We're civil when it comes to work stuff but outside of that we don't really talk. Until a couple of weeks ago. I had a particularly difficult patient call up 3 days in a row and I just needed to vent. In my head it came under the headline of "work related" so I vented to Trish about the patient, she agreed the patient was difficult and I did the correct thing for them etc. I thanked her for letting me blow off some steam about it and went to do something else. I forgot something though so went back and caught Trish bitching about me to 2 other colleagues, calling me soft, a whingy cow, i just need to grow up and get on with it etc.. She was like a deer in headlights. Nothing was said between us but the whole next day she may as well have been kissing my arse.

Now my supervisor messaged me the other day re an extra holiday day around Christmas, Trish is on annual leave currently so the supervisor hadn't yet asked which extra day she wanted. From previous conversations with Trish I know she wanted to take the last few days of the year off so she could go over to Europe to spend NYE with her adult child. After the way she's treated me the last 2 months I felt like being incredibly petty so I asked for the day I knew she wanted and asked to use a couple of my annual leave days as I have "family commitments" meaning I had 3 days off, total, following the weekend (this was also going to be Trish's plan). My supervisor gave them to me. So that now means Trish won't be able to take the days off as there won't be any cover. I also know she's already booked her hotel and flights and she was just waiting for the supervisors to bring up the extra holidays.

So fuck you Trish.

TLDR; Caught a colleague slagging me off so knowingly booked annual leave for dates I knew colleague wanted. Colleague had booked hotel and flights to visit family for NYE. So now she won't be able to go as there won't be cover due to me having booked the time off.

Source: reddit.com/r/pettyrevenge

[flowersforthemachines]

What challenges do you think someone trying to make a "Multiple Romances" mod for Veilguard face? Or a mod to sacrifice both/neither Treviso and Minrathous, instead of having to pick?

Omg, anon... I'm honoured that you decided to ask me <3 Before I say anything else, please consider joining the DAVG modding discord, as it has a lot of useful resources and just as many helpful people!

Re: saving both Treviso and Minrathous. Mons, one of the developer of the DAV Save Editor has actually been working on implementing that feature for the editor for a while and has been posting about it on her bluesky. While she was able to make the game think that Treviso is still fine despite picking Minrathous (well, mostly fine), there are still issues with the logic of Neve and Lucanis's personal quests and crashes in Dock Town. But, well, that's not a mod, but an outside tool, so it's a bit different.

As for the challenges of making those types of mods... Well. The rest is under Read More for length. I love talking about modding quite a bit, and since you *asked*, I didn't really hold back ^_^

I'll be focusing on the Multiple Romances side of things, but basically all of what I say would also apply to making a both/neither Treviso and Minrathous mod.

If I said something wrong and there are mod authors who know better, please feel free to correct me!

You can't edit conversation files directly in the Frosty Editor.

At the moment, Frosty offers only limited support for EBX-editing. If you try to edit conversation files in the Mod Editor (the files you'd be interested in are the FC_ConvFlowLayer type files), it will crash when trying to export the mod.

You can still edit those files through hex editing (tutorial available here), but it's just, you know. Takes time. Export .yaml and .bin, open .yaml to find the offsets, make the edits in .bin, import .bin back into Frosty, see if the game even takes to it... It's kind of long. Much longer than if you could just edit the values directly. And much more tedious.

Wavebend (the developer of the Veilguard branch of the Editor) is planning on implementing full ebx editing support in the future, but they are just one person, so it's probably going to be a while until that happens. (I actually want to dip my hands into making a Multiple Romances Mod, but I've sworn off doing that until we get ebx support).

2. You have no quick way to make sense of a lot of triggers (conditionals)

For example, the conditional to have the option to commit to the romance with Neve is 1309495461 (see node 15 for nev_q21_120_lvl_skip_Root_1.layer). But you don't really know what exactly it is ¯\_(ツ✿)_/¯

Like it has to be some combination of having flirted her with the past and her romance not being cut off, I suppose? But you are completely blind on its exact meaning, and on exact meanings of a lot of other conditionals (save for the basics like Rook's race/class etc. as well as completion of main story quests/companion storylines). Which means a lot of trial and error trying to figure out what's what. It's sort of a mess like that ^_^

Someone did the work on figuring out Lucanis's romance flags as a part of the Veilguard References Project, you can check those here. But you'd have to be a trailblazer for everything else.

3. Even if you figure out what trigger stands for what, editing/deleting them is kind of an arse if I'm being completely honest

I'm not sure if you can straight up delete triggers using hex editing. For example, for my Dalish Elf Rook Mod I had to edit a bunch of lines that could only play if Rook was a Veil Jumper elf and extend them for all elves of background. But I didn't delete the VJ conditionals, and only duplicated the Rook_Elf conditionals instead (so instead of checking if your Rook is an elven VJ, the game just checks twice if you are an elf).

Maybe someone more proficient and patient could work out a way to actually delete things, though.

(One hypothetical way to get around deleting conditionals is to edit them into some gibberish instead. As long as it returns something (and doesn't display as "none" in Frosty), it should work. The earliest version of the Dalish Elf Rook mod had Taash.loc as a conditional for a convo, and the dialogue played as though the condition was properly fulfilled. But it's just for cutscenes, the game will crash if you do the same with ambient dialogue because Veilguard hates you and isn't really shy about the fact).

4. You'd also have to figure out how flags are set with your decisions.

Starting a romance (or, well, making other important choices in the game) sets plot flags. And if you start a romance with someone, the game sets plot flags to cut off romances with all other companions, so you can no longer flirt, or get in a relationship with them. That would be a big hindrance for a poly mod...

DAI had it very straightforward, with its own dedicated section with the flags a line/conversation choice would set that you could easily view and edit. But DAVG doesn't have that, as god has all but abandoned us ٩(＾◡＾✿)۶

I think that the "Actions" section in the node after the node with choices possibly be the thing that sets the plot flags? But in Neve's romance's case, node 16 (coming after node 15 that gives you the option to lock into the romance), has 13 actions. Idk what any of them mean! Gotta be something, I guess.

So, yeah. Something like that. Feel free to send follow-up questions if you have any, I'll try to answer as best as I can!

[sineout]

I switched to Linux

Eight days ago I finally switched to Linux full time.

I've been a dabbler with Linux for near on 25 years, about as long as I've had access to a home computer. My first experiences of Linux came from Linux ISO's bundled on Computer Shopper magazine (and other similar styled magazines) demo discs; and about 5 years ago I started running Linux as a desktop on at least one computer fairly regularly. But I always used Windows on my main system.

As of eight days ago now, that is no longer the case. The only trace of Windows I will have now is if I ever have to run a virtual machine.

The reasons for the switch are many, but they boil down to three main reasons: 1. Issues with Windows itself; 2. Being tired of Microsoft's bullshit; and 3. No longer trusting Microsoft given the current political climate.

1. Issues with Windows. Windows is slow. I have a pretty powerful computer, it has a fast processor (a Ryzen 6800h), 32Gb of RAM, and two NVME SSDs. It therefore shouldn't take 30 seconds for an explorer window to open, just because I have the audacity to have an optical drive (at least I think that's the reason for the delay); it shouldn't take dozens of seconds for a folder of a hundred images to respond to me creating a new folder and then another dozen seconds after dragging some images into it; I shouldn't need to keep on disabling shit I don't want every time Windows wants to do an update, nor should I have shit installed on my system that I don't even know about until I visit my start menu. In short a lot of issues I have are, for the most part, pretty well known, and I'm tired of it.

2. Microsoft's Bullshit. You know what people really love. Being tracked. People really love AI being shoehorned into their computers. They also love their perfectly functional machines becoming unsupported in October this year (yeah just to remind you, Windows 10 support is ending October 2025). There are ways of mitigating a lot of this stuff. It's possible to disable the tracking and AI, and it's possible to build a Windows 11 bootable USB without the restrictions (and also with out the tracking and AI too). But I shouldn't have to do that. And honestly even doing that, there was always the nag in the back of my mind asking if I actually had closed all the doors.

Points 1 and 2 on their own, while compelling reasons for me to make the switch, were never quite enough for me to take that final step. The effort in actually committing was just a fraction more than staying. But point 3 pushed me over

3. Lack of Trust in Microsoft. The current political climate (aka President Elon and King Trumps new and hopefully (literally) short lived dynasty) is, uh, not ideal let's just say. Big companies are already folding on various inclusivity policies; even though the current Executive Orders are essentially just suggestions. They are for all intents, covering their arses in an effort to protect themselves from their new dictators. But that also means that any big company in America simply can't be trusted any more. Would Microsoft say no if they are ordered to give Elon and his goons a back door into anyone's computer?

I don't think, in reality Microsoft would actually do that, and I doubt they'd even be asked, as that'd be an own goal for Elon and Trump that I'd hope a lot of republicans would be upset by. But the possibility remains. I don't know, I realise this sounds a bit conspiracy theory; and it sort of is. But the simple fact is that with rising Fascism in the US among politics and business bowing to it, I can't ignore that possibility.

So, finally I switched.

I'm currently running Linux Mint 22.1, and honestly it's been a pretty painless experience. I knew already that basic stuff like web browsing is already a solved problem in Linux, so I knew I'd have no issues with that, but I've also got nearly all the software I used on Windows running too (I even compiled my first piece of software, MakeMKV, and it works). The only exception is Affinity Photo, but I can spin up a Windows VM for that until I can figure out how to run it in Bottles.

Would I recommend everyone switch to Linux. No I don't. As mentioned, I've been a dabbler in Linux for over 25 years, so I've long gotten used to it. I've also had a long time to prepare for it. For example with exception to Affinity and MakeMKV all the software I routinely use is Free and/or Open Source and thus already has native Linux versions. I also don't make money from working on my computer and I mostly play indie games that tend to have good Linux support too. In addition, I enjoy actively working to get my computer to do stuff; it actually feels a bit nostalgic for me to a time when I had a 486 computer with a stack of demo discs and playing the first few levels of Quake 2 at like 7 frames a second, and thinking it was awesome. Linux is by far not nearly that bad, but I feel like I'm actually using my computer, and not merely a device that lets me go on the internet and play games.

If you're all those things, then a switch to Linux might be something you should consider, and either way I'll probably be writing updates on a fairly frequent basis (I plan monthly), at least as long as I have something interesting to report.

[blubushie]

HI HELLO VERY QUICK YELLING THINGY TWO TRANS MEN ANONS I LOVE YOU! I RELATE TO THE SAME FEARS (AM ALSO TRANS AND PARTICULARLY WISH TO LOOK LIKE A BEAR AND LIKE I FISH)

ANYWAYS. REAL POINT; amab people, cis or gnc or any variation (trans women too, pre transition or during or after, depending on how transphobic etc), are literally barred from certain services on gender-based discrimination. like crisis shelters are reeeally difficult to get into!! or to get help for things like sexual assault or domestic violence! and i’m really, really tired of people saying sexism when they mean misogyny and i’m tired of misandry being a punchline instead of something that DOES happen, just not as systematically enforced as misogyny (and patriarchy is really just also a system that confines EVERYONE into preset societal roles even if it usually has men in a position of power, it still harms men) and i am going to go sleep now. there’s too much caffeine in me

Seconded 100%.

When my mum left my dad she left me in an "abusive" home, at 16, because the DV shelter would not take women with sons older than 12. So boys 12 and older have to fend for themselves with an abusive father, I guess.

Luckily my mum was just a shit and my dad isn't actually abusive.

When I was 17 and going from homeless shelter to homeless shelter I was expected to just put up with the woman who'd get in my face and call me a rapist for staring, and try to physically goad me into fights by hitting me and slapping me because she has issues, and I was told outright that I, as a man, was not allowed to defend myself and that I would be arrested for assault if I put my hands on her in defence of myself. She physically attacked another woman who kicked her arse. Neither was arrested. But I, a man, was expected to just put up with her assualting me, and I would've been arrested for it.

The reason I was staring? I was 17, suddenly unmedicated, and was having PTSD flashbacks to when I was raped as a child. And she was calling me a rapist because I'd zone out and stare at the wall she'd happen to be passing in front of during dinner.

And honestly tired of any time someone brings up men's issues, someone has to go "but the women!" I'm tired of seeing someone post something about men's mental health month (this month!) and reading someone in the tags saying "what do they need that for" or, being aware of men committing more suicides per capita than women, saying "wishing every man a happy kill yourself".

I'm just tired.

[review-anon]

Since you are the Review Anon, what is your biggest constructive criticism you have of each Danganronpa game (so far)? (Don't tag this post with any of them, just to be safe.)

//Alright you want my thoughts on the biggest issues with every Danganronpa title I've experienced? You got it.

//I will not talk about Eternal Endings since I don't think its fair to judge a work by its Prologue alone. Once a chapter has come out, more accurate thoughts could be detirmented.

//Also not tagging the titles since some of them might be a tad controversial, and I know how people tend to be with opinions on the internet.

//That being said; under the cut we go;

Trigger Happy Havoc: Yasuhiro being a survivor

//When it comes to my general survivors, Trigger Happy is at the bottom of my least favourite survivor group as given the overall message of the franchise and the idea the survivors chose hope, it feels the group in question really doesn't live up to it.

//Makoto of course deserved to survive as he's the protagonist and actually the only clean person as he hasn't committed any acts of dishonesty like the others. The closest you can get is him hiding information about Sakura being the mole, but he wanted to just clear the air and find out the context before he told the others, so he was gonna to eventually, he just wanted everything in the clear.

//Kyoko and Aoi have done some shady acts, Kyoko's actions in Chapter 5 were quite deplorable and Aoi did some shit in Chapter 4 but both of them most importantly, know where they went wrong, admitted they fucked up, and started to work towards hope so they earned their positions as survivors.

//The other three...not so much. Byakuya didn't choose hope because he felt bad about what he did, he only chose to aid the survivors because he felt the game was getting "boring" to him, at no point did he say sorry for what he did in Chapter 2, and him going against Junko seems to be more placed in the fact she destroyed the Towa Group then anything. Toko is just a Yes Woman to Byakuya who agrees with everything he says and again, only chose good because Byakuya did so. However, I WILL admit after Trigger Happy Havoc these two do get better as Byakuya learns compassion and consideration of others as he's more concerned about his fellow survivors and leads a rescue effort for them in Danganronpa 3 plus he was the one who personally tried to save the Towa City hostages. Toko is the deuteragonist of Ultra Despair Girls and this did WONDERS for her character since her interactions with Komaru made her a better person and be willing to side with hope and the future on her own accord.

//And then there is Yasuhiro who is NONE OF THAT. He remains the same slimy cowardly idiotic bastard throughout the whole franchise. He is a complete and utter moron who's survivability is questionable, he did some heinous acts in Chapter 4 he didn't apologise for, he was willing to derail the conversation by some of the most banal and moronic of reasons, like the opening argument in Chapter 5 is if Kyoko is a ghost. No I am serious that is the opening argument for that chapter. He's also so insufferable that even Makoto, the paragon of goodness he is, says he could never become friends with him; with only Byakuya and Genocider Syo having that honour. And as such him being around to the end was really stupid.

//Yes I know he's comic relief, but I don't find Hiro funny, I find him annoying, cowardly, stupid and a hindrance to the group more then anything. And while Byakuya and Toko at the very least get better after Trigger Happy Havoc, Yasuhiro DOESN'T. In Ultra Despair Girls Hagakure, he is such a dead weight that Kanon has to save his arse on more then one occassion and remember the motivation machine from Chapter 3? Komaru got saved before it got too much but Kanon wasn't so lucky and was catatonic by the time Hiro found her and he wasn't considerate to her at all. And he also was excluded from the Final Killing Game because to quote Monokuma "Nobody likes him."

//To make matters worse; Hiro surviving also started the annoying trend that the most moronic character has to survive with Kazuichi and Iroha being prime examples of that. He is by far my least favourite survivor especially as I would have preferred either someone else, or at the very least, there to be 5 survivors instead of 6.

//Rest assured when I do my Trigger Happy Havoc rewrite for my AU, Hiro will not be spared as I will make sure he is sent to the Afterlife Theatre as he deserves.

Goodbye Despair: Mikan pulling off the murder plot

// This one is surprise, surprise, the plot hole that Mikan could have committed the crime.

//I mentioned this before on Creeper's Dangancember countdown, but to recap, Hajime wakes up and goes to the hospital where he sees a live recording of what looks to be Ibuki going to hang herself, so he rushes off down to the music venure to try and save her. However the recording was done by Mikan in the conference room in the hospital and Ibuki was already dead.

//Once Hajime see's Ibuki's body, he then goes down to the motel to find others to bring back. During this time, Mikan got into the music venure and then, glued the door shut, snapped some toothpicks, smashed the transmitter, uncovered Hiyoko's body and then went back to the hospital before Fuyuhiko showed up.

//The problem with ALL of this is timing, it would take Hajime about a few minutes to get to the motel and then 10 minutes to get Chiaki to come with him and another few minutes to get back to the music venure. All in all it would take Hajime 20 minutes to do all of that and somehow Mikan was able to do ALL of this under that time frame.

//Now had this been someone like Peko or Maki, who is very physically active, it would have been difficult, but not too implausible to pull off, but then you have to consider the culprit is Mikan. A character so clumsy that her tripping over was used as DECISIVE EVIDENCE in a previous class trial to expose the culprit not being there as he would have made a comment on her due to his perverted nature.

//And even if you argue the tripping was for attention and Mikan is more nimble then she looks, this isn't known to the player at the time, so it can really take away the willing suspend of disbelief. The Neo World Program might be a VR world but it still has to obey basic physics and this just fails to deliver.

//What makes it worse is there was a simple solution; just make it so Hajime doesn't get back in time, make the distance between the motel and the music venure longer, make it so Hajime has a hard time finding people, maybe have someone panicking since Hiyoko isn't there and they are tearing apart the motel looking for her. Anything to make it so it takes more then 20 minutes to get back to the music venure and thus allow Mikan to pull this all off in a realistic time frame.

//And have the same apply to the distance between the cottages and the hospital so that Fuyuhiko also has to take time getting over there, all of this to help it so that Mikan has enough time to pull it off without looking reality breaking in the process.

Ultra Despair Girls: The overreliance on returning characters

//Ultra Despair Girls was always gonna have Komaru as the main protagonist but her partner wasn't always as clear cut. At one point Haiji Towa was gonna be her partner which was a scary thought in of itself but eventually it settled on Toko Fukawa.

//Now I get why Kodaka did this, Ultra Despair Girls was a massive departure from the main franchise already and he was worried it wouldn't sell so adding old characters would help to boost sales. But just because I know why he did it, doesn't mean I like it.

//Toko was alright but I would have vastly preferred having a another new character alongside Komaru with my preferred pick being Kanon. She was a competent fighter so she would have solved being easy mode, plus with Leon being the first executed, it would have caused tensions between her and Komaru which could make for a great character dynamic between them.

//But the crowning example of characters who didn't need to be there was Nagito fucking Komaeda who I am 100% convinced was ONLY added due to him having such a high popularity and thus gets promotions. But Nagito doesn't HELP the story, if anything he hinders it as he doesn't serve the narrative well, his luck isn't a factor to consider, and all the things that make Nagito well...Nagito aren't there.

//ESPECIALLY as this came at the cost of the Hit List Targets who I would have vastly preferred to be important in the story and you still had connections to the first game being their loved ones and what not. They were the biggest victims and I felt the only reason we didn't see them in story is due to Nagito and Toko taking up too much screentime.

//Again, I know why Ultra Despair Girls is the way it is, but seeing how Kodaka is willing to get himself into bankruptcy for the sake of his creative vision, he could have taken the plunge and just did Ultra Despair Girls with only the new characters and while allude and have cameos of the old ones, be that; cameos.

//Not hijack high bits of the plot.

The End of Hope's Peak Academy: The episode length

//You thought I was gonna say the problem is that it exists, didn't you? Well no that's another title entirely.

//Danganronpa 3 was a good idea but flawed in execution but the more I think about it; all the issues with the anime can be boiled down to a single point; length.

//To put it in context let's talk numbers. The average gameplay length for Trigger Happy Havoc is 25 hours at minimum though most people take 45 hours to experience the whole game.

//Goodbye Despair's length is 33 and a half hours while completing it 100% is 60 hours.

//Even Ultra Despair Girls, the shortest title in the franchise prior to this; clocked in about 16 and a half hours with 100% being 25 and a half hours.

//And then End of Hope's Peak Academy had 12 Future side episodes, 11 Despair side episodes and 1 Hope side all which have a run time of 30 minutes per episode which means Future side has about 6 hours, Despair side has 5 and half hours and the finale is only 30 minutes meaning the entire Danganronpa 3 anime is about 6 hours long.

//That is NOWHERE NEAR ENOUGH TIME to conclude the Hope's Peak saga and this has let to a LOT of the writing issues we've seen since the developers didn't have enough time to conclude the whole thing.

//So in order to fix this we could do the following.

Have Danganronpa 3 be seasons instead of all in one, so Season 1 could be Future side, Season 2 could Despair side and if you don't want Hope side to be a season, have that be an animated movie.

Keep the overall length of each season with the final episode count so each season has 24 episodes, which is enough time to wrap up everything.

Cut out the stupid watch order because that was confusing af and disrupted the flow of the story. This would also improve the writing of each story.

//This means in the end we wind up with about 48 episodes and a feature film with a runtime of about 18 hours, on par with Ultra Despair Girl's and while not perfect, its decent enough to make the writing better.

//Personally I would prefer it if Future Arc was a video game and Despair Side was the anime, but its unlikely to occur so we just have to make do.

//And maybe I won't have to joke about whenever it takes longer to get through this or Kanade's and Syobai's pissing match.

Killing Harmony: The lack of divide between the player and the in-game audience

//This is another low hanging fruit here, but if something is a big problem, then it has to be addressed. I don't need to explain why V3's Chapter 6 is controversal, you already know and have a opinion on why.

//But I think I know WHY its so controversal and its due to something Kodaka has competely missed the mark on and a the solo reason why it was as poorly received as it was.

//And that was he completely and utterly failed to cast a line between the in-game audience and the player.

//All the jokes and comments are very meta based and given how portable Danganronpa is you could play it on the computer, a gaming console or even your phone, and so the game trying to say its wrong to be so obsessed over a franchise is basically attacking the player saying they are a monster for liking Danganronpa.

//Which as you can tell went down well; to the point Kodaka had to announce it was NOT meant to be that, but again it was a critical failure on his part to make it clear that you are not the audience and thus not part of the problem.

//So to fix this you need to make the audience more soulless, have scenes where a character was sad that say Tenko died and they get mercilessy mocked by their peers because she's not "real" and they're stupid to say otherwise. How Kaede's and Kaito's messages were ignored since they aren't real or when Shuichi is telling them off, says he is just a character so he cannot tell them what to do.

//Have them cheer when characters get executed which is something NO PLAYER does, even if its a character you completely despise, you still feel bad that they went out the way they did, make it clear this world has lost its soul and people don't care about each other anymore, and love Danganronpa since its the only joy in their lives anymore.

//By having these changes, you make it very clear the audience are not you as you would never be these scumbags and thus be completely behind Shuichi when he tells them to STFU.

Danganronpa Another: Divine Luck as a concept

//So here's a big hot take; I despise Divine Luck, I think its one of the worst powers you could think of.

//And the reason is simple; since its such a reality bending power where the literal universe is at Utsuro's fingertips, it really weakens and dampens a LOT of what we endure in Danganronpa Another, since its hard to tell if it happened due to character decisions, or because of Divine Luck making it happen.

//Its the whole destiny vs. free will; with Divine Luck leaning heavily towards destiny. Take Chapter 2 and with Kizuna trying to kill Akane but then Ayame stepped in? Its a tragic case...but given Akane has Divine Luck...how can you tell if what both Kizuna and Ayame did was out of choice or Divine Luck pulling their strings.

//Furthermore if Utsuro can do ANYTHING with it, and he wanted a normal life, why didn't it happen? If he wanted anything it should have happened, his parents should have been less cruel to him, especially if he could take their powers away from them. Again if you make a power as infinite as Divine Luck with no limits, you then raise questions when something doesn't happen.

//Finally the biggest issue I have with it, it REALLY screams like a get out of jail free card for LINUJ whenever he writes himself into a corner. And LINUJ often traps himself within his own writing and thus whenever he needs to get out, he just hits the Divine Luck button and hey presto problem solved!

//That says more about your lack of confidence as a writer. I will admit I'm not immune to this, as I often use the fact the Voidship has many variants or Library of Ruina's multiversal concept to justify if I fuck up a character in my writing. But I don't use it as much of a crutch as LINUJ does with Divine Luck, and only when I make mistakes. He does it whenever he has written himself into a tight spot and needs someway to get out of it.

//And this problem gets EVEN worse in SDRA2 where the Voids also have the same BS abilities as Utsuro does and since its not clear if its a percentage or not, you have to assume they could also break the universe and it also cheapens a lot of what occurs in that game.

//Overall, Divine Luck is a walking deux ex machina and not in a good way, and this is the main reason why the power is nerfed massively on the Voidship so while its still a thing, its not so mindbendingly stupid.

Sun of Despair and Moon of Hope: How all the murderers were bad guys

//A key message of Danganronpa is that no matter how good of a person you are, if placed under enough stress and triggers, you could be driven to kill someone. Everyone has a breaking point, some easier to trigger then others but eventually, someone will cave in and commit murder.

//This has been the case for the main series and most of the fangans...with one glaring expection and that is SDRA2.

//None absoulately none of the murders in this game were done because someone broke under pressure or felt they had to murder to get out as every single murder was either Void committed or done by the resident serial killer in the game. Don't believe me? Let's break down all the culprits;

//Chapter 1: Hajime Makunouchi who is a Void.

//Chapter 2: Emma Magorobi who is a Void.

//Chapter 3: While its voted as the Otonokoji twins, most people can say Kanade is the culprit who is a serial killer.

//Chapter 4: It gets a bit confusing since Shinji Kasai unalived himself, but the overall scheme was conducted by Nikei Yomiuri who is a Void.

//Chapter 5: Iroha Nijiue was voted as the culprit who is a Void and the actual culprit was Mikado Sannoji, the leader of the Voids.

//Do you see the problem? Literally every murder was done by a Void, the main villains of the game, and the one non Void murder was done by a psychotic serial killer. And this undermines a core message of Danganronpa right here because the whole point of the Killing Game is you have to be cautious of everyone around you, because you don't know if they are planning to kill or not.

//But if all the culprits are either terrorists or serial killers, then you don't have to question your morals, you don't have to be considerate of others because you can just label someone as a bad guy and be that.

//I would have VASTLY preferred it if one of the Voids got killed by someone, not only to see Mikado epicially break down, but to prove the Voids are not immune to consequences, and that again, anyone can become a murderer.

//Yes having multiple masterminds was an original idea, but just because something is unique doesn't always mean its a good idea and this is a very good example where it doesn't work.

Blowback: It taking place in Hope's Peak Academy

//Considering Blowback ended quite early there isn't a lot for me to talk about it but the one issue I do have is the fact it takes place in Hope's Peak Academy and does nothing with it.

//Yes both Another and The After also take place in Hope's Peak Academy but they try to spice things up with it like Another being a fake Hope's Peak Academy and The After being a old abandoned building from decades ago. Blowback does nothing with this setting and it just feels like baby's first fangan.

//I do wonder why the fangan got cancelled, as I know in-fighting was the cause but part of me guesses the fact Blowback didn't have a lot of good ideas might be a reason why it fell apart.

//If you are gonna keep going back to the same building, at least do SOMETHING with it and not just be what looks like a rom hack of Trigger Happy Havoc.

Rebirth: The nonsensical writing

//Rebirth as I mentioned a bunch of times, is a mess. This is because it wasn't meant to be a serious fangan it was an April Fools joke made by Miwashiba but then he decided to make it into an actual fangan.

//And it SHOWS since the writing is all over the place and no matter if you go for the Japanese or English version of the story, its still just horrible writing all over the place.

//Ayumu's gender being mismanaged by both stories, the setting being different, the Ultimate Spirit Medium being a thing that shouldn't be allowed in a Danganronpa series since it breaks immersion, characters dying pointless deaths for the sake of it, the Masterminds being stupid, the list just goes on and on.

//Part of me is GLAD both versions got cancelled since had these ideas been fleshed out, fans wouldn't have been so accepting towards them. If the ideas sound bad in concept then don't do them, you cannot make a bad idea good with enough greasework, a bad idea will always be a bad idea. Good ideas can get distorted, but if its a flawed concept, then no amount of repairwork is gonna fix it at its core.

Despair Time: The Secrets Motive

//I really need to do the rest of my Despair Time review at some point, but I will say my biggest issue with it is how HORRIBLY IMPLEMENTED the secret motives are.

//Secret Motives aren't new, they are a very common motive to have, and its also so common to give said secrets to someone else, so this is a tried-and-trusted first motive, especially as it could lead to us learning more about the characters and provide interesting character dynamics.

//But Despair Time is by far the worst execution of this by far as all it does is cause character conflicts in Daily Life which are mostly banal and stupid. I know this is meant to be a TV Show where stupid conflicts happen all the time since that's "entertainment" but at least make the conflicts interesting and not be J screaming at Arturo because he's a Mariabella simp.

//Especially when the secrets had NOTHING TO DO WITH THE MURDER. Ace was already planning to kill someone for sometime and while him tormenting Nico did lead to them almost killing him, all it did was just convince him that he needs to kill someone. And again Ace was already a bully to Nico even BEFORE the secrets motive, he didn't bully them due to being a bigot, heck the one thing Ace DOESN'T do is misgender Nico as he does respect their pronouns.

//If a motive has nothing to do with the murder and conflict was occuring even before the motives came along, then its a bad motive. It gets even worse in the Class Trial since 80% of the fucking trial is decoding the motives, and as David points out, it did NOTHING to solve Arei's murder.

//Its just such a bad execution, as there is a right and wrong way to have motives be part of the plot, and the way the secrets motive in Despair Time was handled was the worst example of this.

//As a fix; maybe Ace was insecure about his sexuality as a homosexual...but when Nico is found out to be an enby and everyone accepts them for who they are, and Ace didn't get that in his life, it might cause jealousy and make him lash out at Nico, which then leads to the murder attempt. Then maybe Ace doesn't believe people can change and gets pissed off when Arei tries to do character development and kills her for that, not that he was targeting Eden and only switched when Arei got involved.

//Both of those could have been easy fixes to make how the secrets was handled much better then we got and most importantly don't have it eat up most of the trial time and not amount to anything in the end.

The After: The fact Konoe might be tied to the overall plot of the game

//Now this is about bits I didn't like in a fangan from a writing perspective not from a personal perspective, otherwise this would devolve into another rant why Ryohei Seki deserves to be thrown into the fucking sun and how I will throw a massive party where everyone who was fucked by him is invited when he dies.

//But as much as I hate to admit it, Ryohei IS well written and it is a interesting way to take a rival character, especially how the protagonist Konoe is in general.

//Thus it has to be something else, and I think my gripe has to be with how it seems Konoe is a important person to the Killing Game.

//The whole idea of someone like Konoe or Makoto is that they are average everyday men who via their own traits, Makoto's optisim and Konoe's friendship vibes that make her seem like she came from Equestria, but they build people up, make them the best versions of themselves and when the Mastermind, who thinks humanity is the worst tries to oppose them and they fight back, they fail as a result.

//And while Junko did acknowledge Makoto was a threat in Danganronpa 3, her own idealogy let him live and plus its Danganronpa 3. It needs no explanation.

//But if Konoe is a key person then what is the point? Is she the mastermind? The traitor? A reason why the Mastermind is doing this? I don't know in all fairness and this is a lot weaker then the others since I can't really find anything else I don't like from a writing perspective, plus I'm sure the fangan will answer this.

//I don't like it because I don't like it when masterminds see someone as a threat and don't snipe them at the first opportunity as it really does underscore everything the heroes do.

//The After is a very solid fangan after all and sorely underrated.

Tetro Pink: The implication the masterminds will be Karma Houdinis

//Tetro Pink as in large doesn't have as many writing problems as the others as for as emotionally devastating as it its, its a very solid fangan.

//But there is a nagging feeling I do have about it, and if I'm right will majorly piss me off and that's the fact the scientists will get away with everything.

//This does have some evidence, Vonbabbit has confirmed there is a Season 2 which means we can't lock up all the scientists at the end of Tetro Pink because how else would another Killing Game occur?

//I know the Bad Guys winning is a unique concept but again just because something is unique doesn't make it good. A big selling point of Danganronpa is that the survivors can band around a ideal and use it to tell the Masterminds to get lost and they survive on their own terms.

//But if the survivors get their memories wiped, have false ones added and no consequence happens to the masterminds, then that's gonna piss a lot of people off that justice has missed its mark. It would also make Season 2 less impactful because we know as long as there's another season, nothing is gonna happen to the masterminds and nothing will change.

//The best case scenario is Biology Head gets some consequences since he's the most antagonistic of the masterminds and the main driving point for a lot of the grief the characters have; both students and staff. And maybe the Head Scientist also gets consequences as well.

//But a lot of them probably would be able to go back and do another killing game, and if Biology Head is not punished and if anything winds up in a stronger position then before, then its not gonna end well as I can see a lot of outcry over this.

//But don't worry...they might escape justice canonically...but they won't escape me...I will ensure consequences come to them...

Project Eden's Garden: Eva's Motive

//And now that certain people have played PEG, I can update this with my current biggest writing issue with Project Eden's Garden.

//Again this is from a writing and story perspective and not a gameplay one, otherwise you all know what my biggest gripe with this game is, as I've been very vocal about it.

//And it has to be how unneccessarily complicated Eva's motives are. As when she's unmasked as the killer, Eva didn't just kill Wolfgang because she was pissed at him for excluding her and wanted revenge, there's also the fact she discovered the traitor's perk with her mathatic skills and Tozu told her if someone would kill before her, she would also be killed. And she also did it because she hated her talent and the Ultimate system that much. And she also feared she would be a easy target in the killing game also explaining why she targeted Diana as her fall girl.

//The problem I have is this is very unneccessaily complicated. Bear in mind this is Chapter 1 where the motives are usually "self-defence" "tricked into killing" and "framed by the mastermind" not six different reasons to kill Wolfgang like Eva did. She could just killed him because she was pissed at being excluded and that would be easy enough for anyone to understand.

//To make matters worse, since this first murder had about 20 reasons behind it, now I think that all future culprits will need a book of reasons to kill. That's not a good precident.

//Having said that, PEG is still only Chapter 1 so there is a lot more room for it to improve and who knows, I find something something writing wise which pisses me off more then Eva's COMPLEX MOTIVES. But its the biggest gripe I've got.

//Either way that's my thoughts on what I think are the biggest issues I have with each of the titles and possible future points for developing ones I am not happy with.

EDIT 30-01-25: Edited this to included Project Eden's Garden.