#Configuration Management Tools
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Dive into the heart of DevOps automation tools with Impressico Business Solutions. In this episode, we unpack the top tools—from Jenkins and CircleCI to Packer and Terraform—revealing how they streamline development, enforce consistency, and boost collaboration. Tune in for expert insights, practical tips, and real-world success stories to power your pipeline.
#DevOps Automation Tools#Major DevOps Tools#DevOps Monitoring Tools#Configuration Management Tools#DevOps Automation
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Ansible vs Terraform: Best DevOps tool?
Ansible vs Terraform: Best DevOps tool? @vexpert #vmwarecommunities #homelab #ansiblevsterraform #cloudinfrastructuremanagement #provisioninginfrastructure #configurationmanagementtools #infrastructureascode #multiclouddeployment #networkautomation
Ansible and Terraform are excellent DevOps tools that can provide many automation benefits in enterprise and cloud environments. Both of them have capabilities that can overlap with each other. However, I would say that each has its strengths in configuring and provisioning infrastructure. Look at Ansible vs Terraform and see which automation tool is best for which task. Table of contentsAt a…

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#ansible vs terraform#automation tools comparison#Cloud Infrastructure Management#configuration management tools#immutable infrastructure approach#infrastructure as code#managing cloud services#multi-cloud deployment#network automation with ansible and terraform#provisioning infrastructure
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The Top 5 Software Configuration Management Tools of 2025: Powering the Future of IT Infrastructure
In today’s fast-paced, ever-evolving digital landscape, businesses are scaling at an unprecedented pace. Netflix, one of the leading streaming giants, is a perfect example of this transformation. It evolved from a DVD rental service to streaming billions of hours of content globally, providing viewers with seamless access across various devices. But how did Netflix manage this rapid growth and ensure consistency across its vast software infrastructure? The answer lies in Software Configuration Management (SCM) tools—an essential component of modern software development.
SCM tools ensure that the development process runs smoothly by tracking and controlling changes in software code and configurations. They provide a systematic approach to managing the software lifecycle, from development to deployment, ensuring that all systems work in harmony. This crucial "quality control" allows businesses like Netflix to scale their operations while maintaining stability and minimizing disruptions.
As businesses continue to expand, having an effective SCM tool becomes essential to managing distributed systems, maintaining uptime, and ensuring consistent performance across the organization’s network. SCM tools play a pivotal role in helping organizations keep pace with the rapidly evolving tech landscape, enabling innovation while reducing the chaos typically associated with scaling projects. In this article, we explore the Top 5 Software Configuration Management Tools of 2025, offering businesses the tools to handle modern software challenges effectively.
What Are Software Configuration Management Tools?
Software Configuration Management (SCM) tools help development teams control and track changes in software code, configurations, and documents across multiple environments. These tools are designed to ensure consistency, automation, and security during the deployment process. With businesses increasingly adopting DevOps practices and continuous integration/continuous delivery (CI/CD) pipelines, SCM tools have become indispensable. They streamline the process of software development and ensure that changes are made efficiently without risking stability.
SCM tools help prevent errors that arise when different environments (e.g., production, testing, and development) have different configurations. They provide version control, change management, and rollback options, allowing developers to fix issues swiftly and avoid potential downtimes. Furthermore, SCM tools enable real-time updates, ensuring that systems are always running the most up-to-date configurations without compromising performance.
Why Are SCM Tools Crucial for 2025?
The rise of cloud computing, microservices, and DevOps has dramatically changed the way businesses approach software development. Enterprises are dealing with complex, distributed systems that require meticulous configuration management. This complexity makes it crucial for teams to have powerful SCM tools at their disposal. These tools:
Automate deployment and monitoring: SCM tools help automate system updates, configuration changes, and compliance monitoring, reducing manual intervention and the potential for human error.
Ensure scalability: As businesses scale, SCM tools allow for seamless adjustments across hundreds or thousands of servers and microservices, ensuring that systems are configured correctly across all platforms.
Support real-time configuration changes: These tools make it possible to manage and deploy real-time updates without causing disruptions, helping to maintain uptime and service availability even during major updates.
The Top 5 Software Configuration Management Tools of 2025
Let’s dive into the top 5 SCM tools that businesses will rely on in 2025 to handle their evolving infrastructure needs.
1. Auvik
Auvik is making a splash in the SCM world, thanks to its easy-to-use interface and powerful automation capabilities. It offers real-time network visibility, monitoring, and network configuration management. Auvik helps businesses streamline their network operations by automating network mapping, performance monitoring, and configuration backups. It provides real-time alerts for potential issues, empowering businesses to proactively manage their networks.
Key Features:
Automated network discovery and real-time mapping
Network performance monitoring and configuration backup
Seamless integration with various IT management tools
Why We Chose Auvik: Auvik is designed to simplify the complex task of managing large, distributed networks. With its automated capabilities and easy integration, Auvik offers real-time control and monitoring to ensure that networks are running efficiently and securely.
2. Puppet
Puppet is a well-established leader in the field of infrastructure automation and configuration management. It helps businesses automate the entire lifecycle of their infrastructure by managing resources across both cloud and on-premise environments. Puppet simplifies the deployment process, reduces operational costs, and ensures consistency by allowing users to define and enforce system configurations as code.
Key Features:
Infrastructure as code (IaC) for consistent, repeatable deployments
Integration with major cloud providers like AWS, Azure, and Google Cloud
Automated system provisioning, compliance management, and configuration enforcement
Why We Chose Puppet: Puppet is particularly effective for organizations that need to scale their operations while maintaining control over complex infrastructures. Its robust ecosystem and enterprise support options make it ideal for businesses seeking a flexible and scalable solution.
3. CFEngine
CFEngine is a lightweight, agent-based configuration management tool known for its ability to scale efficiently, managing environments ranging from small devices to large-scale infrastructures. CFEngine’s core strength lies in its ability to continuously enforce configurations, manage patches, and automate compliance across an organization’s IT infrastructure.
Key Features:
Agent-based architecture for scalability
Continuous configuration enforcement and patch management
Open-source and commercial editions available
Why We Chose CFEngine: CFEngine is particularly well-suited for organizations with large-scale infrastructures. Its lightweight, scalable architecture ensures that businesses can automate their configuration management without sacrificing performance or security.
4. CHEF by Progress
Chef is an infrastructure automation tool that enables organizations to manage and configure their software development and IT infrastructure at scale. It provides comprehensive tools for automating deployment, ensuring continuous compliance, and managing configurations. Chef is particularly powerful for automating infrastructure as code (IaC) and integrating with cloud platforms like AWS, Google Cloud, and Azure.
Key Features:
Automation of infrastructure provisioning and configuration management
Continuous compliance and security management
Integration with cloud platforms for a seamless experience
Why We Chose Chef: Chef is perfect for enterprises looking to automate complex infrastructures. Its extensive features and premium support options ensure that businesses can easily scale their operations while maintaining compliance and security.
5. SaltStack
SaltStack is an open-source SCM tool that excels in real-time infrastructure automation. Known for its event-driven automation and remote execution capabilities, SaltStack helps businesses quickly respond to changes in their IT environment. It provides powerful tools for configuration management, orchestration, and system monitoring.
Key Features:
Event-driven automation for real-time updates
Remote execution and orchestration capabilities
Integration with various platforms and cloud environments
Why We Chose SaltStack: SaltStack stands out for its ability to automate changes in real time, making it an excellent choice for businesses that require quick responses to infrastructure changes. Its flexibility and scalability make it an ideal choice for enterprises with complex IT environments.
Conclusion: Choose the Right SCM Tool for Your Business
In 2025, businesses face a challenging environment where scalability, automation, and consistency are paramount. Software Configuration Management tools are no longer optional; they are essential for ensuring that businesses can manage and scale their software systems efficiently. Whether you're managing networks, automating cloud infrastructure, or ensuring continuous compliance, the right SCM tool will provide you with the tools you need to stay ahead of the competition.
By selecting an SCM tool that aligns with your business’s unique needs, you can streamline your operations, enhance security, and enable innovation without compromising on stability. Be sure to explore the features of each tool to determine which one is best suited for your specific environment.
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Fix "Perform Site Maintenance or reset this site" greyed out
Recently, I wanted to upgrade my Configuration Manager from the evaluation version to a full version, but I was unable to due to the following error discussed in this article. Therefore, we will fix “Perform Site Maintenance or reset this site” greyed out. Please see how to Fix Keep personal files and apps option greyed out during Upgrade, How to use the Reliability Monitor in Windows, and How to…
#configuration management#Configuration Management Tool#Configuration Manager#Microsoft Endpoint Configuration Manager#Microsoft Windows#Perform Site Maintenance#Reset this site configuration manager#Windows#Windows 10#Windows 11#Windows Server#Windows Server 2012#Windows Server 2016#Windows Server 2019#Windows Server 2022
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Top 5 Software Configuration Management Tools Of 2022 - TechDogs
#Configuration Management Tools List#Top Software Configuration Management Tools#Software Configuration#Best Configuration Management Tools
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5 Essential Tips for Maintaining Top-Notch Salesforce Org Health
Introduction: Salesforce has become an indispensable tool for businesses to manage customer relationships, streamline operations, and drive growth. However, just like any other complex system, your Salesforce organization requires regular attention and care to ensure it remains efficient, effective, and aligned with your business objectives.
In this blog, we'll explore five essential suggestions to maintain a top-notch Salesforce Org health, helping you get the most out of your investment.
Best Tips for Managing Salesforce Org Health
Regular Data Cleanup and Maintenance: A cluttered and disorganized Salesforce Org can lead to decreased user productivity, slower system performance, and inaccurate reporting. Regularly conduct data cleanup exercises to eliminate duplicate records, outdated information, and irrelevant data. Implement validation rules, workflows, and data governance processes to ensure that data entered into the system is accurate and consistent. Consider archiving or purging old records that are no longer needed, which can significantly improve system responsiveness.
Optimize User Training and Adoption: Even the most powerful tools are only as effective as the users who operate them. Invest in comprehensive user training programs to ensure that your team fully understands the features and functionalities of Salesforce. Regularly assess user adoption rates and address any issues or challenges they might face. Encourage the use of best practices and provide ongoing training as Salesforce releases updates and new features
Govern Customization and Configuration: Salesforce offers an array of customization options to tailor the platform to your specific business needs. While customization is valuable, an excessive amount can lead to complexity, slow performance, and difficulties during upgrades. Establish a clear governance framework for customization and configuration. This includes guidelines for when to use declarative tools (like Process Builder) versus custom code, as well as regular reviews of custom objects, fields, and processes to ensure they remain relevant and effective
Implement Robust Security Practices: Data security and privacy are paramount in today's business landscape. Regularly review and update your Salesforce security settings to ensure that only authorized personnel have access to sensitive information. Implement strong password policies, multi-factor authentication (MFA), and role-based access controls to minimize the risk of data breaches. Regularly audit user permissions and deactivate accounts for employees who no longer require access to the system
Stay Informed About Salesforce Updates: Salesforce continuously releases updates, enhancements, and new features to improve the platform's functionality and security. It's crucial to stay informed about these updates and assess their potential impact on your organization. Create a process for reviewing and testing new releases in a sandbox environment before rolling them out to your production Org. This practice helps identify any potential compatibility issues with your existing customizations and allows for adjustments before affecting users.
Conclusion:
Maintaining a top-notch Salesforce Org health requires a proactive approach that involves regular cleanup, user engagement, customization governance, security measures, and staying updated on platform developments. By following these five essential tips, your organization can ensure that Salesforce remains a powerful tool that contributes to your business success, helping you drive growth, streamline processes, and deliver exceptional customer experiences.
#Salesforce Org Health#Org maintenance#CRM optimization#Data integrity#Performance tuning#System health check#Data hygiene#Configuration management#Best practices#User adoption#Customization management#Security audit#Data governance#Automation tools#Regular updates#User training#Scalability#Backup and recovery#Compliance measures#Analytics and reporting
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For those who are not aware: Bitlocker is encryption software, it encrypts your computer and makes it impossible to access the information on the computer unless you have the key.
It should be standard practice for IT companies to document the bitlocker keys as they are configuring bitlocker on a computer; generally you would do this by creating a record in your client management software for that specific device and putting the key in the record. Sometimes software can be used to extract that information in the event that it's necessary, but even if there's theoretically a way to extract the key, it should be documented somewhere *other* than on the encrypted computer.
This is something that a lot of IT people fuck up on kind of a lot (we've definitely had problems with missing bitlocker keys and I'm quite happy that the people who didn't document those keys aren't my coworkers anymore).
So what do you do if you want to use encryption software and you're NOT an IT company using a remote management tool that might be able to snag the keys?
When you are setting up encryption, put the encryption key in your password manager. Put it in your password manager. Document the important information that you cannot lose in your password manager. Your password manager is a good place to keep important things like your device encryption key, which you do not want lost or stolen. (If you run your password manager locally on an encrypted computer, export the data every once in a while, save it as an encrypted file, and put the file on your backup drive; you are going to have a bad time if your computer that hosts the only copies of your passwords shits the bed so *make a backup*)
This is my tip for home users for any kind of important recovery codes or software product keys: Print out the key and put it in your underwear drawer. Keep it there with your backup drive. That way you've got your important (small) computer shit in one place that is NOT your computer and is not likely to get shifted around and lost (the way that papers in desks often get shifted around and lost).
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Here's a thing!
Containing: Bill as a widower, a surprise reincarnation, and dire threats of matrimony.
Despite how things turned out, Dipper has no regrets.
Okay. There is one: Getting caught in the first place.
But other than that, he’s lived his life the way he wanted to. Everyone told him joining the resistance was a terrible idea. That he had a bright future ahead of him, that he was smart, to not throw it all away for a useless, impossible task.
Like he could ever do anything else.
Even at the end of things, Dipper’s proud of what he accomplished. He helped so many people. He picked his fights carefully and mostly had them work out in his favor. He did the best he could, pushed himself to the very limits of his abilities, and it worked so well.
Bright future his ass. Fighting got him further than anything could. When you think of what he’s done. Where he’s clawed back territory. Who he’s saved-
A pang goes through his chest. Dipper ducks his head, hissing against the gag between his teeth.
Okay, second regret: Not saving more people. And not avenging others. Three regrets isn’t so bad. Right?
God, what else could he have managed, if he hadn’t been stupid. If he hadn’t slipped up this one time, if he could have escaped. If he could have-
“NEXT!”
Bill Cipher’s voice rings through the room. Two claps punctuate the statement, and the line moves forward.
Claws dig into Dipper arm, tighter than before. While they still don’t break the skin, the way he’s dragged forward has him hissing again. His skinned knees burn as they slide against stone, and the pain reminds him not to let up his guard.
Not here, in the Fearamid. There’s no worse place.
In a way, he’s kind of lucky. The massive pyramid that makes up Bill Cipher’s headquarters and fortress has never before breached. No member of the resistance has made it into the command base of the terrible demon who rules the west coast.
Dipper never thought he’d end up here, ever. The closest he’d imagined was in vague daydreams. The impossible kind where he had amazing powers, spouted cool one-liners, and could smash through the entire awful fortress to kick Bill Cipher right in his angles.
“Ugh.” Bill’s groan resonates through the room. “Why the hell would I need gold? Real crappy offering.” Another clap, then, “NEXT!”
Being tribute wasn’t exactly on Dipper’s bucket list.
So here he is. Dragged along by his captors to be one more present for the Nightmare King himself.
Demons try to slake their master’s insatiable greed with an endless parade of presents. The raiding never ends. The looting, the theft, the bribes - everything, everywhere gets poured into the coffers of this monster. Nothing is enough for him. It never will be.
So it’s pretty weird that Dipper’s here. By himself.
A hundred humans at once might provoke a passing interest. A few tons of liquor or - apparently not gold, no wonder that assassination attempt failed - could also catch his eye. Only the most elaborate, creative gifts might gain a bit of his favor, which is hard to get on a good day.
One human who really made Bill’s day worse, though? That might get a second look. Dipper didn’t think he was that big of a deal, but it would be kinda cool.
Or he wasn’t, and his captors will twist him into a new flesh configuration once they reach the front of the line, like performance art. Or he has been a pain, and when Bill finally gets his hands on him and can do whatever he wants to him, he’ll do unthinkably horrible -
No. Dipper can’t think like that, not now or ever. Fear won’t help. It never helps.
Terror one of Bill’s tools. He thrives on mortals cowering before him, and Dipper won’t do that.
He shakes his head to clear it, and gets the hood shoved further down for his efforts. The thin string around his neck draws tighter as a demon adjusts the cloth. Then it plucks at it, in an apparent attempt to make its captive look more ‘presentable’.
“You sure it’s-” One of the demons mutters above him. Another pluck at his hood pulls it upwards, and he hears a smack.
“Shh! Don’t show everyone ‘til we take credit,” insists the leader. Tension makes his voice rough. “You saw it. Just like in the pictures. Boss’ll love it.”
Sounds like they’re trying to reassure themselves rather than actually thinking this will go well. Dipper snorts. Amusement on the gallows.
All four demons shush him. He can practically picture them holding fingers to their mouths in unison, hissing at their captive. It makes him snort again, and a hand shoves his head down.
Shushed, of all things. The sheer absurdity makes him want to laugh.
Being captured was bad enough. All his hypervigilance turned out useless when it really counted. Everything he’d taken notes on, the plans, the studies - none of those mattered when he was dangling by his ankle from a snare in the woods like a helpless animal.
But the way he was taken captive? That was notable. A realization that only hit once he was stuffed into a box and had nothing to do except think - but an important one.
For one, most demonic traps leave their victims in multiple pieces. And for another, he wasn’t devoured afterwards. There was an odd amount of caution involved in his handling for a human with so little magic. Almost like they were frightened of doing it wrong.
And after that, he should have been smacked around and beaten for his defiance. Hell knows he didn’t take this bullshit lying down. But instead of ending up with open wounds and a broken jaw, there’s a bag over his head and rough cloth gag to shut him up.
In fact, aside from a few bruises and scrapes, Dipper’s perfectly fine. By all demonic standards, his entire kidnapping makes no sense.
Unless you know what Bill Cipher likes to do to humans.
Dipper tries to swallow past the lump in his throat. He hadn’t wanted to think of it. Now the idea won’t stop popping up, cold grey swimming through his thoughts.
There aren’t many pictures of Bill’s ‘sculpture’ garden. Most aerial shots just get the gist of it, a field spotted grey against green. Stone hands reaching for the sky or clutching their faces, thousands of bodies screaming for their life or hunkered down to the ground -
Swallowing again doesn’t help. His mouth is too dry, even when the gag is damp between his teeth.
Soon he’ll be one of the thousands of ornaments Bill makes of human lives, instead of killing them nice and clean. Another trophy.
Maybe it won’t hurt? Dipper hopes it doesn’t hurt. He hopes that that’s what he’s here for, rather than anything more creative. But it’s the only fate that makes sense.
A bit of cold comfort, then. He might not be mutilated. If he’s ‘just like the picture’ - whatever that means - then Bill will want him to stay exactly as he is.
It sounds absurd. But who knows? Odds are Bill Cipher has a type, and Dipper will make an exceptionally pleasant sight once he’s permanently a part of his estate. Maybe he’s got a thing for rebellious, fashionless nerds having the worst day of their life. Whatever goes on in that triangular brain is too weird for Dipper to fathom.
He hopes that being a statue is peaceful. Or at least not too painful. That it happens in a flash, like he’s seen in video. And if he’s lucky, the company he’ll keep for the next… forever might include his -
“Bo-ring,” Bill interrupts the next offering before the demon gets three words into their speech. “I’d say do better next time, but guess what?”
Two claps this time. Something explodes with a splatter, close enough that Dipper and his kidnapping coterie all flinch back.
“There won’t be another.” Bill finishes. He pauses for laughter at his dry semi-joke, then claps once more. “NEXT!”
The line of supplicants moves forward. Dipper’s knees skid across the floor as he’s dragged forward, sliding to a stop as his captors pause in their line.
They must be pretty far at the front by now. The group of demons in front of Dipper’s speaks excitedly to an unresponsive audience. He swears he hears a yawn.
Impressing Bill Cipher is difficult at the best of times. Doing it with one single human seems reckless even by Dipper’s limited knowledge, but excited murmurs keep darting over his head.
Either they know something he doesn’t, or there’s another factor in play. And hell, considering the tributes Dipper’s overheard, they could hardly do worse. Nothing’s impressed Bill so far. At best he’s waved off their offerings to be piled up with all the, quote, ‘other crap’.
The latest batch doesn’t fare any better than the previous one. Like last time, Bill groans and something goes ‘splat’. A sprinkle of unknown fluid hits Dipper’s knees, soaking into his jeans.
“Ugh,” Bill groans, low and extended. It seems like it’ll go on forever, until he hears, “NEXT!”
Dipper’s shoulders tense. His jaw clenches, arms and legs pressing against their bindings. None of which stops him from being pulled along in his kidnapper’s wake.
This is it, then. Facing the lord of dreams himself, eye to… cloth, Dipper doubts he’s going to get a real look at him.
Which might be for the best. Word is that Bill can manage terrible things to the human psyche, given the chance. Dipper’s very human, and he doesn’t have enough magic to defend himself even if anyone knew how to manage it.
So maybe it’s okay that he’s a little terrified, because it’s natural. And even more importantly, Bill won’t see it.
“My lord,” The demon that captured Dipper speaks in a gravelly voice. He’s a green-gray lizard creature, with several eyes, and his sheer amount of muscles belies a sharper mind than usual. Anyone who fought him might have made that mistake. “I found you somethin’ really cool.”
He sounds strangely excited about presenting a single mortal to his king. A hint of pride, maybe, that he kept it so intact? It could be difficult for demons, because Dipper’s sure never heard of it before.
His thoughts are interrupted by a slow push, sliding him forward across stone. Careful force, that lets him keep his balance instead of planting on his face. At least he’ll face his fate upright.
One more tribute. Sitting in front of a king, in a crowd of monsters, Dipper has his pride. And he will not bow.
And the response from Bill Cipher is… probably not what the leader wanted.
Dipper hears another groan, followed by a heavy sigh. “Wow. A human. Never seen one of those before.”
Ah, great. Sarcasm. Bill Cipher sounds as impressed with Dipper as he was with the dozen tributes before him - bored, tired, blase.
Dipper straightens his back, oddly offended. Wait, he doesn’t suck as tribute, right? Part of his pride hinged on his captor not being an idiot. It made losing less embarrassing.
“Ugh. Seriously getting tired of this crap.” Bill’s voice has a tinge of annoyance to it. Kind of a whine, even. “Like I don’t have enough in the rock garden already. The shine rubbed off that apple a while ago.”
“Er,” The lizard demon hesitates. “Uh, well. Nah, see, there’s-”
“Eh, whatever.” With another sigh, Bill snaps his fingers. “Alright, one statue, coming u-”
“Wait!”
The crowd hushes. A few gasps, a couple whispers at the sheer audacity. Even Dipper twists to look at his captor in sheer surprise. A useless gesture, he still has a hood over his freakin’ face. But, like. What?
That gruff voice burst out so quickly that it sounded almost defensive, and - what the hell is going on?
The too-busy hall has gone eerily quiet. Even the mad Nightmare King doesn’t speak, probably surprised at this act of open defiance.
“I- sorry, sorry, my lord. But, like, you’re gonna really like this one.” The demon continues, rapid like he’s on the verge of panic. But insistent, too. A tense excitement runs through his words. “You gotta take a look.”
Dipper blinks in a fruitless attempt to clear his eyes. Stupid fabric over his face. He’s flying blind here.
He wishes he could see everyone’s reactions. Mortals bore Bill at best. Aside from making them into decorations, he barely bothers interacting directly. One young human shouldn’t make a demon yell at Bill Cipher. He shouldn’t matter, or be important, or even register as anything. What the hell?
The crowd stays deathly silent. Bill doesn’t speak. A slow tapping of fingers thuds like a drum in the quiet, a slow contemplative beat.
The Lord of Nightmares holds his own counsel as he judges this outburst. Weighing his options.
“Huh,” Bill says, a second after Dipper thought everything would explode - “Got a lotta confidence in your prize, I see! Guess that’s kinda interesting.” His voice grows louder as he approaches, but there aren’t any footsteps. This monster floats. “Whatcha got there?”
“Well, he was runnin’ about messing up some stuff, and, well, we saw him and - y’know.” The lead demon continues babbling, voice rising to a squeak. Bill must have closed the distance, meeting him eye to multiple eyes. “And! And we made sure not to leave a mark or anything, we was real careful.” A beat of pause; presumably Bill giving him an askance look. “Aside from tying ‘em up, yeah? He woulda run off otherwise.”
“Huh.” Bill says, again. More thoughtful now.
The same thing Dipper might have said, if he wasn’t gagged. True, he hasn’t been beaten up for fun, or toyed with, or devoured. But he’d guessed it was to leave him a more presentable statue.
Said Nightmare King must be very close by now, intrigued by the semi-sales pitch - or maybe because there’s a secret. Dipper can feel warmth in front of him, radiating from an unseen source.
Another drumming, fingers on metal. Then, with a hint of a shrug. “Alright. Show me.”
The hood whips off, and Dipper gets a dizzying look at a massive room, black stone bricks and red lines, demons everywhere. Adjusting to the light takes a second, until his eyes land on the shape in front of him.
Dipper blinks a few times - then glares at this jackass.
Bill Cipher, King of Nightmares, conqueror of half the country and weird goddamn asshole, blinks right back.
Dipper’s seen this monster before, though not in person. Cipher’s always on the news. Appearing on TV and in print, whenever he conquers another piece of territory. His pictures are in magazines, photographs in articles, he has a few intimidating ad spots online - he’s everywhere, even on some forms of cash. It’s impossible to avoid this stupid shape.
And wow, none of that is photoshopped, huh. Turns out Bill’s exactly as weird as advertised. Polygonal and golden. Noodly limbs, top hat, everything.
A total, monstrous asshole.
Dipper strains at his bindings, rising up on his knees. Unfortunately, the gag’s still in place, so instead of cursing this jackass out like he wants to, it’s all muffled shouting.
Bill Cipher goes perfectly still. He hovers in place, a motionless midair shape.
His single eye has a split pupil, and it meets Dipper’s own without moving. Or blinking, either, even though it’s been long enough that Dipper gave up trying to match it.
He’s just. Staring.
Which is… honestly getting eerie. The motionless focus, the impenetrable gaze. Not intimidating, of course. But weird.
Dipper drops back with a huff. Great. He’s having zero effect on this guy. Not even annoyance, and he hoped there’d be some.
As a last ‘fuck you’, he lifts his bound hands in Bill’s direction, and flips him off.
Bill’s pupil narrows to a single thin line. He makes a strange, back-of-the-throat sound without any visible neck. Like he’s choking.
“So, uh,” The lizard demon rubs at the back of his neck. Greenish sweat pours down his scales, and he wipes it on his tunic in short swipes. “Do you-”
“Shut up and gimme.” Bill interrupts. He darts forward in a blink of motion, making grabby hands in the direction of Dipper’s face. “Gimme gimme gimme!”
Neither Dipper nor his captor have time to react. Bill simply seizes him by the shoulders, hauling him away from his captors and onto his feet so fast his shoes leave streaks on the floor.
“Mh!” Dipper yells against his gag, stumbling to catch his balance. It isn’t the most eloquent protest, but he hopes the ‘you jerk’ gets across anyway.
While Bill’s hands are relatively small, they’re impossibly strong. His grip on Dipper’s biceps feels close to bruising, slightly shaking in its intensity.
Bill tugs him closer. The bizarre pupil flashes through a series of shapes too rapid to parse. A second later it flips horizontal, sweeping a beam of light up and down Dipper, head to toe.
While it doesn’t feel like anything, Dipper does his best to wriggle away. He hopes it messes with whatever scan this bastard’s doing. He hopes it’s as annoying as this demon is. A kick aimed at one of Bill’s floating legs didn't land, but it was worth a shot.
Bill ignores his struggles. He laughs at the kicks, which deserves more kicking. He wraps those horrible noodle arms around Dipper's biceps like ropes and giggles when Dipper growls at him, flickering side-to-side in weird, glitchy glee.
The sound of his stupid laughter makes Dipper want to fight him all the harder - useless, of course, those arms only look noodly. They’re super-magically powered. But that doesn’t mean he won’t try.
“Oh.” Bill says, lower than before. He draws Dipper close, bringing him almost within headbutting range. “Oh, now this is beautiful.”
“Mh?” Dipper tries to glare to poor effect. Confusion and anger keep jockeying for space in his head, and he’s pretty sure it shows.
And Bill starts laughing, high and loud and wild. He’s glowing now, surface lit from within with a bright golden light.
“Well! Gotta say this is interesting!” Bill pushes him back slightly, at a human-ish arm’s length. Though he still keeps a solid grip on Dipper’s arms , squeezing tight. “But man, this wrapping’s crap! What happened to ribbons on presents, guys?” His eye rolls. “Lemme fix that.”
With that said, he grows a third arm from one of his sides and snaps his fingers.
The cloth of Dipper’s gag parts like it was clipped with scissors. The bindings on his wrists cleave open, the chains on his ankles explode off his socks, and it’s only because Bill’s still holding him upright that Dipper doesn’t fall over out of sheer surprise.
He wipes at his mouth - spitting out threads in the process, he’d really been trying to chew through the gag - and coughs. With his wrists untied, he can flex his fingers and drop his arms to his sides, hands clenched into fists.
Because now he’s… free-ish. For some reason. With Bill holding onto him there’s zero chance of getting away, but still.
Dipper works his jaw a little, to loosen it. Rubs his wrists to ease the low ache. There’s a huge crowd of demons in this immense hall, so. No escape routes, not when the place is packed with monsters like a can of sardines.
Eventually he has to admit he’s wasting time. The big problem is right in front of him, if he can just. Face it.
Taking a deep breath, he turns his head to look at the worst creature in the entire goddamn world.
Bill’s lower eyelid has risen up in a curve, kind of like a smile. Still laser-focused on Dipper’s face, boring into him as if he could see into his soul. Or maybe plotting a laser course through his prefrontal cortex.
But there isn’t any mockery. No taunting or yelling or stupid puns. None of the typical theatrics that you’d see on a news report. Just… more staring.
Dipper clears his throat. He tugs at the collar of his shirt.
The whole room has gone so, so quiet. He didn’t think it could get quieter than before, but that was people glancing at each other, waiting for a chance to leave the crime scene. A hush littered with bits of gossip and gasps, warnings passing between the crowd.
This silence is an indrawn breath. Held in anticipation.
So. Here he is. In front of the greatest, most powerful monster in history, and instead of being a cool dramatic confrontation, with like. Action, or a witty back-and-forth - it’s just awkward.
“Well, sapling?” Bill prompts, eye narrowing. He releases Dipper’s arms only to point directly at his face. Like he's accusing him of something. “Got anything to say for yourself?”
Dipper breathes in deep.
Okay, then. Space to talk? A chance to say whatever he wants?
Yeah. That he can work with.
“Fuck you, Bill.” He spits out the words, putting all the hate in his heart into the venom of his tone. He steps forward, getting right in this asshole’s… face? Surface? Whatever. “I hope you die. In a fire. And that your ugly-ass pyramid falls on you, and you get crushed in the rubble, and - and that your exoskeleton gets melted down for scrap, because you just suck that much.”
Bill… says nothing. No magic twists Dipper into a terrible shape. No pain jolts through his body.
And when Dipper dares to look him in the eye, his face reflects back from the infinite depths of Bill’s pupil, blown wide from the tiny slit of seconds ago. By this point it’s nearly a circle. Which is weird, and kind of intimidating -
But he’s not made of rock yet. Bill hasn’t retaliated, probably because he’s too stunned to react. And fuck him.
“And another thing,” Dipper continues, less steadily now. He didn’t have a speech prepared. But since he’s not dead, hell, might as well make the most of it. “You’re dumb as hell, and I hate you. So much. You’re the worst thing that could ever happen to m-”
Something goes ‘splat’ just beside him, making him flinch. Another wet sound lands nearby, followed by another, and another. A slow patter that builds in pace, rapid and thick.
Dipper stares in horror as literal, throbbing hearts pop up and circle around Bill Cipher’s top hat, spinning in a rapid circle. As more manifest, old ones fall to the floor like the world’s worst rainstorm, spattering red across the stone. Even his pupil is that same friggin’ organ now, pumping away in silhouette.
“Aha. Ha ha!” Bill’s voice raises in pitch with his laughter, and his fingers wiggle in anticipatory glee, just before his arms extend and coil around Dipper’s body, pinning his arms to his sides. “HA HA HA HA HA!”
Dipper opens his mouth to protest. Rather pointless in retrospect, though he does get out a “Hey!” as he’s lifted off the ground.
That stupid heart-rain has stopped, at least. Now it’s just Bill, glowing incredibly bright and giggling like the complete madman he is.
Dipper kicks out in protest, swearing and struggling. Bill’s dumb noodle arms have some give to them, but they’re wrapped tight enough that it doesn’t matter.
“YOU!” Bill’s voice was already loud, but now it resonates. Filling the hall with a boom, ringing against the walls. His eye has blown out to a circle again, and in the depths a few strange, starlike dots glimmer. “Of course it’s YOU! Nothing was gonna keep you away, was it? And now you’re back!”
This is the point where Dipper would protest again. Or threaten, or question or - something.
But it’s pretty hard to get words out when an insane demon is spinning you around like a carnival ride, complete with fireworks overhead.
Below him the crowd cheers, a raucous chorus. He could swear more demons are pouring in by the second into an already packed hall. Lights are going off and on in a strobe, with the pop of fireworks ringing overhead. Music blares from one corner, then another as stereo sound kicks on.
Between the explosions, the lightshow, the noise - Dipper would try to figure out what the hell is going on, if he weren’t trying not to be sick from the spinning.
Bill doesn’t seem to notice any of this, focused on the human he’s captured. Eventually he slows, letting Dipper touch solid ground again Dipper with a glimmer in his eye that instantly makes him wary. Something is up, and he doesn’t know -
“I know just what to do with you, kid.” Bill says, eye narrowing. Two hands come up and cup Dipper’s cheeks, strangely warm - “C’mere!”
Watching Bill’s eyeball drop back into its socket, and the huge, sharp teeth emerge from the mouth where his eye should be, Dipper knows immediately that this. This is how he’s going to die.
Then the eyelids purse into lips, and Bill hauls him in face-first.
“Mmmmwha!” A long, exaggerated sound. Pretty dramatic, really. Bill draws back, eye smiling at Dipper as he squeezes his cheeks with both hands. “Oh man! You have no idea how long I’ve waited for that!”
“Whuh.” Dipper says, intelligently.
Bill cackles, chucking Dipper under the chin, then tickling it with a couple fingers. “Ha! Did one little smooch rock your world?” His eye wiggles, with horrible, terrible implications. “Don’t worry, there’s way more where that came from!”
Dipper reels from the sensation of having his whole face - not eaten, or rearranged, but - His legs totter, but the arms around him keep him upright.
A million questions whirl around. None of them have answers. They simply spin and spin and spin until Dipper’s brain feels blank, like -
Oh. Okay.
Intellectually, Dipper knew that Bill could break minds. He just thought it’d be more gory and torturous. For some reason.
“And as for you-” Bill turns towards the cluster of demons that brought Dipper here, to this weirdo showcase. Under his gaze, even the most terrible monsters cluster together with nervous smiles. “Who’s in charge of your little outfit?”
Tentatively, arm shaking, the leader raises a hand. Bill’s eye snaps to it and he floats in, right in front of the lizard demon’s sweating, scaly face.
Then his lower eyelid rises in that strange emulation of a smile, and he gives him an incredibly hard high-five.
“Alright everyone, listen up!” Bill proclaims, turning towards the crowd. Grabbing the lead captor’s wrist, he raises it up like a winning prizefighter. “These guys get free drinks for the next two millennia!”
A cheer rises up from the crowd. The lizard demon’s mouth purses in a ‘o’ of delight, hands fluttering at his cheeks like a human winning a gameshow. Dipper spends a moment staring at the frankly bizarre site of a group of demons clutching each other like giddy highschoolers, bouncing in a circle.
“You heard it here first, guys! The boy is back!” Bill shouts. He whirls in a full circle, nearly giving Dipper a heart attack. It feels like any moment he’s going to fall, even when he’s wrapped up - “And you know what that means?”
Gasps bubble up from the gathered demons. A susurrus of voices starts, fluttering back and forth in the crowd.
‘Party’, is whispered from one corner. Another careful voice ventures to ask, ‘Party?’. The word repeats, flickering in and out of hearing as it spreads through the crowd. Off in the back a single voice lets out a loud ‘Wooo!’
“That’s right!” Bill is so, so loud, and so, so pleased. He holds Dipper overhead, bouncing him up and down. “Iiiiit’s PARTY TIME!”
An explosion of confetti covers the room. A disco ball drops from the ceiling, music bursts from unseen speakers, and Bill sets his captive down on the floor next to him. His arms uncoil, spinning Dipper around like a top until he thinks he’ll fall-
As the room reels around him, Dipper reaches out for the closest solid surface, leaning on it until the room stops whirling around him.
If the surface happens to be the worst asshole ever, well. He didn’t have any other options.
“Hell, free drinks for everyone tonight!” Bill shouts, to a huge, monstrous cheer from the crowd. Part of the room has transformed into a long bar, and a good third of the demons are already rushing towards it. “Get while the getting’s good, guys!”
Watching the stampede, Dipper’s too surprised to move, until the demon under his elbow does it for him.
“Stick close, sapling. These guys can get pretty rowdy!” Bill says. His metallic surface is warm, not quite hot to the touch. The corner pressing into Dipper’s side, though, that’s annoying. “Don’t want you getting lost again.”
A tight belt wraps around his waist and makes him startle - but it’s just Bill again. A small black hand pats his stomach twice before taking hold of his shirt.
And Dipper’s standing here, not dead. Not a statue, not an experiment. Kind of an offering, maybe, but a weird one. He’s just…
Standing beside Bill goddamn Cipher, unharmed by the most unhinged creature in the universe. And why the fuck is that?
An explanation has to be nearby. A reason. For everything.
Why he’s here. Why he got this reaction. Why this Bill is so not like the Bill on the news, and maybe even why demons are chanting ‘chug chug chug!’ to a monster bodysurfing the crowd, drinking from a bottle the size of his arm.
Dipper feels a glass pressed into his hand, cold with a slender stem. He holds it absentmindedly, glancing around the room and the raucous party kicking up, trying to find sense in the nonsensical.
The hall is huge, so. Fits a party atmosphere, he guesses. Bill himself has one ropy arm warped around his waist, with a grip on his shirt so tight he’s pretty sure it’d tear if he took off running. Behind them is the dais where Bill reigned over the tributes, making each and every decision from his throne -
Dipper does a double-take, glancing back over his shoulder.
A second throne sits next to Bill’s on the dais. Way harder to spot, though; it lies in shadow, unlike the brightly lit rest of the room. The dark grey blends with the shaded light until it nearly matches the black walls. A seat too small for any human-sized person, and too human-shaped for any different kind of person. Instead of either, a painting rests on the seat.
Easing out of Bill’s grasp is impossible, but with effort Dipper manages to twist around for a better look.
The painting is set in a gilded frame with elaborate designs - mostly triangle based, no surprise there - but the picture itself is of a human.
Sitting in the smaller throne is a portrait of a young man. Messy brown hair and a lean build, wearing casual clothes and a faint half smile. His head tilts towards the viewer, as if they just caught his attention. His expression looks like he heard a dumb joke and is ready to retort, amusement shining in his dark brown eyes. Beneath his bangs a series dots and lines in pink stands out, like a strangely shaped… birthmark.
Dipper’s hand flies to his chest. His heart feels like it’s stopped for a second.
No, wait. That can’t-
He whips around, getting a ‘hey!’ from Bill who nearly spills his martini at the motion. Dipper smacks him out of the way, his hat is blocking the view.
Now that he’s spotted them, they’re impossible to miss. One portrait hangs out to the left of the throne, sleepy-eyed and cowlicked hair blinking in the viewer's direction. On the right a shirtless human lounges on a couch, jeans slightly undone. Another hangs from the ceiling of all things, glaring down at Bill’s throne from above like an annoyed god.
Shit. The pictures.
They all look exactly like Dipper.
“Geez, aren’t you squirmy? Ha! Figures!” Bill says, floating closer. When one of his arms loops around Dipper’s neck and he tousles his hair, it meets a man gone still as a statue. “You’re always a pain in the angles! It’s adorable!”
“What the fuck is this.” Dipper can’t even make it a question. His voice is too tense to rise at the end.
Bill’s eye swivels from his face, to the portraits, then back again. It rolls in its socket so far back it comes around again. “You. Duh.”
“How-” No, that’s not the right question. “What- Wh- huh?”
Not his best showing. Words aren’t working right; they fail him along with his usually organized thoughts. Dipper can’t concentrate. His mind filled with too much weird and why and - in an insane section of his brain - an incredulous, really, Bill?
“Oh, that.” Bill says, flicking away dismissively. He gestures over the portraits, the party, and then at himself. His arm makes another loop around Dipper’s neck, loosely draped. “What’s to wonder about? It’s simple!”
“Is it.” Dipper says, flat. He stares forward, even as the arm snakes around and around his torso in two loose loops.
“Absolutely!” Bill’s voice drops as he closes in. Not quiet, but muted enough to not be heard over the party crowd. “See, you got away from me once, kid. And fair enough, that’s what mortals do!” The stem of the martini glass shatters in his grasp, and he drops the remains with a casual flick. “They die on ya!”
Dipper glances at the portrait on the throne, then back to Bill. Tries to swallow, though his mouth feels dry with a sudden, looming realization.
“But there’s no escape this time. Never again.” Bill's eye narrows, so close to Dipper's face it's nearly touching. “Prepare for happily ever after.”
#This is not a oneshot#I actually have a whole plot for this and everything#God help me#Do I have to come up with a title for this? Maybe I'll wait on that#In my docs it's called marrying the grief-mad demon scourge but I'll probably pick something Punny#As is my fashion
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Welcome back, coding enthusiasts! Today we'll talk about Git & Github , the must-know duo for any modern developer. Whether you're just starting out or need a refresher, this guide will walk you through everything from setup to intermediate-level use. Let’s jump in!
What is Git?
Git is a version control system. It helps you as a developer:
Track changes in your codebase, so if anything breaks, you can go back to a previous version. (Trust me, this happens more often than you’d think!)
Collaborate with others : whether you're working on a team project or contributing to an open-source repo, Git helps manage multiple versions of a project.
In short, Git allows you to work smarter, not harder. Developers who aren't familiar with the basics of Git? Let’s just say they’re missing a key tool in their toolkit.
What is Github ?
GitHub is a web-based platform that uses Git for version control and collaboration. It provides an interface to manage your repositories, track bugs, request new features, and much more. Think of it as a place where your Git repositories live, and where real teamwork happens. You can collaborate, share your code, and contribute to other projects, all while keeping everything well-organized.
Git & Github : not the same thing !
Git is the tool you use to create repositories and manage code on your local machine while GitHub is the platform where you host those repositories and collaborate with others. You can also host Git repositories on other platforms like GitLab and BitBucket, but GitHub is the most popular.
Installing Git (Windows, Linux, and macOS Users)
You can go ahead and download Git for your platform from (git-scm.com)
Using Git
You can use Git either through the command line (Terminal) or through a GUI. However, as a developer, it’s highly recommended to learn the terminal approach. Why? Because it’s more efficient, and understanding the commands will give you a better grasp of how Git works under the hood.
GitWorkflow
Git operates in several key areas:
Working directory (on your local machine)
Staging area (where changes are prepared to be committed)
Local repository (stored in the hidden .git directory in your project)
Remote repository (the version of the project stored on GitHub or other hosting platforms)
Let’s look at the basic commands that move code between these areas:
git init: Initializes a Git repository in your project directory, creating the .git folder.
git add: Adds your files to the staging area, where they’re prepared for committing.
git commit: Commits your staged files to your local repository.
git log: Shows the history of commits.
git push: Pushes your changes to the remote repository (like GitHub).
git pull: Pulls changes from the remote repository into your working directory.
git clone: Clones a remote repository to your local machine, maintaining the connection to the remote repo.
Branching and merging
When working in a team, it’s important to never mess up the main branch (often called master or main). This is the core of your project, and it's essential to keep it stable.
To do this, we branch out for new features or bug fixes. This way, you can make changes without affecting the main project until you’re ready to merge. Only merge your work back into the main branch once you're confident that it’s ready to go.
Getting Started: From Installation to Intermediate
Now, let’s go step-by-step through the process of using Git and GitHub from installation to pushing your first project.
Configuring Git
After installing Git, you’ll need to tell Git your name and email. This helps Git keep track of who made each change. To do this, run:
Master vs. Main Branch
By default, Git used to name the default branch master, but GitHub switched it to main for inclusivity reasons. To avoid confusion, check your default branch:
Pushing Changes to GitHub
Let’s go through an example of pushing your changes to GitHub.
First, initialize Git in your project directory:
Then to get the ‘untracked files’ , the files that we haven’t added yet to our staging area , we run the command
Now that you’ve guessed it we’re gonna run the git add command , you can add your files individually by running git add name or all at once like I did here
And finally it's time to commit our file to the local repository
Now, create a new repository on GitHub (it’s easy , just follow these instructions along with me)
Assuming you already created your github account you’ll go to this link and change username by your actual username : https://github.com/username?tab=repositories , then follow these instructions :
You can add a name and choose wether you repo can be public or private for now and forget about everything else for now.
Once your repository created on github , you’ll get this :
As you might’ve noticed, we’ve already run all these commands , all what’s left for us to do is to push our files from our local repository to our remote repository , so let’s go ahead and do that
And just like this we have successfully pushed our files to the remote repository
Here, you can see the default branch main, the total number of branches, your latest commit message along with how long ago it was made, and the number of commits you've made on that branch.
Now what is a Readme file ?
A README file is a markdown file where you can add any relevant information about your code or the specific functionality in a particular branch—since each branch can have its own README.
It also serves as a guide for anyone who clones your repository, showing them exactly how to use it.
You can add a README from this button:
Or, you can create it using a command and push it manually:
But for the sake of demonstrating how to pull content from a remote repository, we’re going with the first option:
Once that’s done, it gets added to the repository just like any other file—with a commit message and timestamp.
However, the README file isn’t on my local machine yet, so I’ll run the git pull command:
Now everything is up to date. And this is just the tiniest example of how you can pull content from your remote repository.
What is .gitignore file ?
Sometimes, you don’t want to push everything to GitHub—especially sensitive files like environment variables or API keys. These shouldn’t be shared publicly. In fact, GitHub might even send you a warning email if you do:
To avoid this, you should create a .gitignore file, like this:
Any file listed in .gitignore will not be pushed to GitHub. So you’re all set!
Cloning
When you want to copy a GitHub repository to your local machine (aka "clone" it), you have two main options:
Clone using HTTPS: This is the most straightforward method. You just copy the HTTPS link from GitHub and run:
It's simple, doesn’t require extra setup, and works well for most users. But each time you push or pull, GitHub may ask for your username and password (or personal access token if you've enabled 2FA).
But if you wanna clone using ssh , you’ll need to know a bit more about ssh keys , so let’s talk about that.
Clone using SSH (Secure Shell): This method uses SSH keys for authentication. Once set up, it’s more secure and doesn't prompt you for credentials every time. Here's how it works:
So what is an SSH key, actually?
Think of SSH keys as a digital handshake between your computer and GitHub.
Your computer generates a key pair:
A private key (stored safely on your machine)
A public key (shared with GitHub)
When you try to access GitHub via SSH, GitHub checks if the public key you've registered matches the private key on your machine.
If they match, you're in — no password prompts needed.
Steps to set up SSH with GitHub:
Generate your SSH key:
2. Start the SSH agent and add your key:
3. Copy your public key:
Then copy the output to your clipboard.
Add it to your GitHub account:
Go to GitHub → Settings → SSH and GPG keys
Click New SSH key
Paste your public key and save.
5. Now you'll be able to clone using SSH like this:
From now on, any interaction with GitHub over SSH will just work — no password typing, just smooth encrypted magic.
And there you have it ! Until next time — happy coding, and may your merges always be conflict-free! ✨👩💻👨💻
#code#codeblr#css#html#javascript#java development company#python#studyblr#progblr#programming#comp sci#web design#web developers#web development#website design#webdev#website#tech#html css#learn to code#github
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In this episode, we explore the importance of Software Configuration Management tools for developers and teams. We also highlight how Impressico Business Solutions helps businesses streamline their development process, ensuring stability, collaboration, and efficiency. Tune in to learn more about SCM tools and automation!
#Software Configuration Management Tools#Configuration Management Tools#Software Configuration#Configuration Management
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ChatGPT Bot Block
Hey Pillowfolks!
We know many of you are still waiting on our official stance regarding AI-Generated Images (also referred to as “AI Art”) being posted to Pillowfort. We are still deliberating internally on the best approach for our community as well as how to properly moderate AI-Generated Images based on the stance we ultimately decide on. We’re also in contact with our Legal Team for guidance regarding additions to the Terms of Service we will need to include regarding AI-Generated Images. This is a highly divisive issue that continues to evolve at a rapid pace, so while we know many of you are anxious to receive a decision, we want to make sure we carefully consider the options before deciding. Thank you for your patience as we work on this.
As of today, 9/5/2023, we have blocked the ChatGPT bot from scraping Pillowfort. This means any writings you post to Pillowfort cannot be retrieved for use in ChatGPT’s Dataset.
Our team is still looking for ways to provide the same protection for images uploaded to the site, but keeping scrapers from accessing images seems to be less straightforward than for text content. The biggest AI generators such as StableDiffusion use datasets such as LAION, and as far as our team has been able to discern, it is not known what means those datasets use to scrape images or how to prevent them from doing so. Some sources say that websites can add metadata tags to images to prevent the img2dataset bot (which is apparently used by many generative image tools) from scraping images, but it is unclear which AI image generators use this bot vs. a different bot or technology. The bot can also be configured to simply disregard these directives, so it is unknown which scrapers would obey the restriction if it was added.
For artists looking to protect their art from AI image scrapers you may want to look into Glaze, a tool designed by the University of Chicago, to protect human artworks from being processed by generative AI.
We are continuing to monitor this topic and encourage our users to let us know if you have any information that can help our team decide the best approach to managing AI-Generated Images and Generative AI going forward. Again, we appreciate your patience, and we are working to have a decision on the issue of moderating AI-Generated Images soon.
Best, Pillowfort.social Staff
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Not sure if you’ve been asked this before, but what are your favorite/essential mods for new vegas? I’ve only ever played it unmodded so I’m curious
Good question! I definitely have answered this before, but that was so many years ago. It's only now that I've taken the opportunity to overhaul and modernize my own mod set-up that I've been figuring out the answer to this question myself. But I can definitely talk you through the most important parts of my new load order.
First, however, every single person modding this game in this day and age absolutely needs to start with the Viva New Vegas modding guide, and follow every step to the letter. The recommendations are air-tight and the instructions are written and presented as if you, the reader, have never even seen so much as a computer before. It's amazing. The "Base" of VNV contains nothing but bugfixes, lightweight unofficial patches, performance optimizations, and other under-the-hood stuff designed to remedy FNV's infamous stability issues while maintaining a completely "vanilla" feel. This makes it absolutely necessary, in my opinion, even for people who don't actually want to play with any (other) mods. Especially crucial to this guide is its mandate to use Mod Organizer 2; if you're using Nexus Mod Manager, Vortex, or Fallout Mod Manager any time since Biden got elected, you are shooting yourself in the foot plain and simple. The best endorsement that I can give of Mod Organizer 2 is that it mods you game completely virtually, meaning that if you fuck your mods up beyond repair, you can just go to your actual FNV launcher in your root folder and boot up the vanilla game like nothing ever happened.
And the "Extended" section of Viva New Vegas consists of more modding tools, quality of life tweaks, content restorations, and a curated list of strongly recommended gameplay modifications that nevertheless all come down to your personal preference (though deviating from their provided list may make you use your brain a little bit when choosing the right compatibility patches, and so on).
This isn't going to cover every single thing that I play with, but here's everything that I would think to suggest to anybody who asked. With that said, here's Fallout "Lou" Begas's Mod Recommendations, 2024 Edition:
Viva New Vegas Extended: Lou's Preferences
VNV Extended recommends several gameplay modifications that come down to personal preference. I installed just about all of them, with a few exceptions (I don't care at all for B42 Optics, for example). Here's some specific details:
Just Assorted Mods has a hell of a lot of features but I actually enable are breath-holding, the vanilla sprint, and the loot menu (though I flip-flop often on using JAM's Bullet Time in place of V.A.T.S.). If you install VNV and boot up the game and wonder "what is all this fucking shit on my HUD," it's probably some of Just Assorted Mods's components. Just disable the ones you don't want in the in-game Mod Configuration Menu, which you will also have available if you followed the instructions for VNV Base.
Vigor is a modernized fork of JSawyer, the mod that was originally created by FNV's own director after the game's release that tweaked a lot of under-the-hood game settings and statistical balance to his personal preferences. JSawyer Ultimate Edition a more faithful modernization of the original JSawyer whereas Vigor is "a more lightweight alternative" that dials back some of the more drastic features of JSUE. Your choice of these, or none of them, is purely personal preference, and my preference is for Vigor. Any form of JSawyer is strongly recommended if you play in Hardcore Mode.
Simple Vigor Config is used in conjuncton with Vigor and is an intuitive and easy way to overwrite Vigor's gamesetting changes with your own preference. I use the config to adjust carry weight to a much more punishing (25 + 5*STR) formula that incentivizes the use of backpacks, mindful inventory management, and companion inventory space; and to increase the starvation, thirst, and sleep Hardcore Mode rates to 10, 5, and 14 respectively.
Desert Natural Weathers is the weather mod to end all weather mods, in my view, and it includes configuration for customizing the darkness and visibility of nighttime. This effectively obsoletes former dinosaurs like Darker Nights Ultimate Edition. Refer to the post that I made on DNUE's Nexus page here for a copy of my settings to darken those dang nights with DNW.
In AIStewie's Tweaks's nvse_stewie_tweaks.ini file, I set bCustomSpecialPoints = 1 and iNumPointsToAllocate = 35. This slightly reduced starting stat spread forces you to make tradeoffs in your character creation, because it starts with a perfect middle 5 in every stat. Every addition above average will require a subtraction below average. The "Essentials" INI included with VNV Base is all that most players will ever need, so this is my one specific personal tweak that'll keep you from scrolling through every single option in the whole damn thing (though I also recommend enabling the tweaks that hide all of your skill check tags in dialogue for more immersive and less gamified roleplaying in conversation: set bNoSkillTags, bRemoveFailedSuccessText, bRemoveRedOutline, and iRemoveTags to all = 1. )
Lou's Personally Valuable or Sentimental Tweaks and Fixes
Better Pause Menu Screen (Simple Blur). I play with an ultrawide resolution and the vanilla pause menu filter doesn't actually extend past 1920x1080. So this is really vital, lol.
Vanilla Animations Weapon Scale Fix. This mod will fix a common issue with custom weapons and animation mods where your weapon will become invisible because its scale has gotten stuck at 0.
Companion Carry Weight Fix. All companions in the game have an invisible attribute called "companion suite" that, among other things, halves their carrying capacity based on their actual stats. If you play with a super low carry weight formula like I do, you can see how this is a problem. Here's the solution.
Miscellaneous Tweaks Collection includes a few files that I get great use out of: No DLC Recipes Early (great unless you integrate DLC crafting ingredients into your base game somehow) and Vendors Have Throwables (why the fuck are throwing weapons so hard to find in vanilla!). There are others that I use as well but I recommend these two the most generally.
Lucky 38 Suite Upgrade Terminal Tweak is a very cute little mod that removes the ugly wall-mounted terminal and makes you purchase your suite upgrades from the actual computer on the desk in the master bedroom instead.
I Fought the Law - Simple NCR Start finally gives you a good reason to check out NCRCF if you're not siding with the Powder Gangers.
Hire Cass Early was my "dream mod" for the longest time, and thanks to some help, it's finally a reality. Simply pick up the letter that this mod adds to the Mojave Express office in Primm and you can recruit Cass right away (through the usual persuasive requirements) without ever stepping off the road from Goodsprings to the Mojave Outpost. Part of my ongoing "make @ikroah real" project.
Harder Strip Access. Getting into Vegas to finally confront Benny should feel like a tremendous accomplishment. This mod makes it so. Better pony up the caps or call in one hell of a favor, kid! With any kind of tougher economy mods, especially, this mod makes it wonderfully Herculean to just buy your way onto the Strip.
Balance Tweaks
Pseudo-Realistic Carry Weight - No Weightless Item Overhaul and Realistic Bottle Cap Weight. The former is actually an optional file; the main file just implements the the carry weight formula that I was coincidentally already using. The latter just forces you to think strategically about how much money you're walking around with. Can you tell that I love inventory management? Note that if you give bottlecaps weight, you should definitely let yourself drop them when necessary by editing Stewie's Tweaks (bShowCurrencyInContainers = 1).
Carry Weight Affects Speed, Med-Tek Trauma Kit (Lou's Version), and More Conditions to Fast Travel. The first appearance of my own mods on this list! These three mods in conjunction tie your encumbrance and your overall health to your mobility far more strictly. I love the balancing act of packing enough supplies for an excursion while leaving enough room for loot that I can still fast travel with, and the choice to get greedy with more loot than I can comfortably carry and just hope to not run into danger on my slow walk back toward a merchant. My tweaks to the classic Med-Tek Trauma Kit mod apply this level of emergent gameplay and resource management to your limb health, though it makes the game much more difficult unless your character specializes in Medicine. I haven't tried it myself, but Simple Healing System is fully configurable, modern mod that I've had my eyes on and that might be better for most general playstyles, and it might even be compatible in conjunction with my Med-Tek mod for extra intensity!
Better Charisma (Charisma Affects Dialogue Skill Checks) and/or Charisma Affects Reputation. I've always been very frustrated with how much of a meaningless dump stat Charisma is, and the phenomenon of the 1 CHA 100 Speech player character in general. These two mods, which you can use just one of or both together, give Charisma much more meaningful and palpable functionality.
Terrifying Presence (Lou's Version), speaking of Charisma, changes the requirement for this perk from Level 6 and 70 Speech to Level 2 and 6 CHA, making it much more accessible to more types of intimidating characters. This same mod includes alternate options to take it as a trait instead, with the drawback(s) of either tanking your Speech and Barter and/or increasing your addiction chance. See also: Less Snarky Terrifying Presence.
New Vegas Karma Rebalance is a great under-the-hood mod that makes FNV's nearly vestigial karma system less nonsensical without removing it or its effects on the player entirely. Thanks to this and Mass Ownership Tweaks, which is already included in VNV Extended's recommendation of Essential Vanilla Enhancements Merged, Cass won't hate your guts just for stealing a few things from Caesar's Legion at Cottonwood Cove, especially not after you've already killed them all.
Damage Multiplier solves the sluggish damage sponge problem that plagues Bethesda engine combat by simply multiplying all damage dealt globally, both by and to the player, by a factor of your choosing. I use 2.5x, which is usually enough to kill any level-appropriate human being with a single shot to the head. 2x should be the minimum. Combine with Combat Enhancer NVSE and NPCs Use Ammo for overall faster but much more ferocious and intense combat engagements.
Visuals and Animations
Third Person Camera Overhaul. Though I'm still getting used to its extremely specific configuration settings, this is vital for a third-person enjoyer like myself. It obsoletes any and all "dynamic camera" or "shoulder swap" mods of the past. Once you figure out how it works and what you like, you're set for life.
Realistic Movement and Dramatic Inertia. Although a little goofy, it has never felt better for me to physically move around in the game than it has before. I like the weight and get-up-and-go that this mod has for me as a player, but it's especially significant in firefights and other combat situations where, now, your targets can't dodge bullets by shifting direction instantly or stopping and turning on perfect dimes. For a single, less heavyweight alternative, try 360 Movement and Diagonal Movement together instead. Each pair of these mods is incompatible with the other pair, however.
B42 Loot, B42 Interact, and B42 Inject. I recommend a lot of the B42 family of animation overhauls in general (except B42 Optics, lol) because I just love seeing my character actually do the things they're doing. For B42 Loot, I use the included config file to disable the "force pull" effect, and for B42 Interact, there exists compatibility patches between it and its more third-person oriented counterpart Animated Ingestibles, but I'd only look into that if you know what you're doing (though, I do).
Character Kit Remake is a mod that I was turned onto recently. For a long time I have scoffed at character appearance overhauls out of nostalgia for those classic gamebryo engine potato-faces and what I thought was, to be blunt, the tasteless ineptitude of the actual overhauling. But I do really like this one, even if the showcase of screenshots do a really bad job of selling it. It looks a lot better in motion and in game, I promise. i think that these people are just not good digital photographers.
Height Randomizer. It's funny how much you can get attached to a minor character when they are, for whatever reason, especially tall or short. This lightweight mod just adds some height variance to all NPCs in the game that don't already have a non-normal 1.00 height setting in vanilla.
The Strip Groove. Dance on command. Endorsed.
Items, Economy, Crafting, Survival, Repair, Etc.
Gloves Galore (Lou's Version), Power Armor Gloves, Combat Armor Gloves, and White Glove Society Wear Gloves. Anyone who has followed me long enough on here should know that I have strong, totally normal feelings about gloves.
Armed to the Teeth Redux and literally any backpack mod. I've used this duffel bag forever, for example. I love these ones because I personally love when you can physically, literally see the things that a character is supposed to be carrying.
Flashlight NVSE. Another piece of Agnes Sands's arsenal, this is the one "old" mod that I can't quit. Even if it is a little janky, I've yet to find a better directional flashlight mod. Only install this is you think you can handle wrestling with it a little, and make sure your "Exterior" flashlight settings are all on the lowest quality regardless of computer specs (or else it causes flickering). It's a must-have for darker nights, too.
Famine is the last "loot scarcity" mod you'll ever need. Combine it with Harder, Barter, Faster, Stronger from the VNV Extended recommendations list for a really tough time affording even basic necessities without tailoring your build for mercantile success... which is just how I like it.
Cheaper Repair Costs. The vanilla formula for determining the cost of weapon and armor repairs at merchants is, in a word, fucked, where it literally costs twice the weapon's base value to repair it from broken. This mod lets you adjust that proportion so that you won't be better off literally selling and buying another gun in every single case. I play with a rate of 67% (which means that paying a merchant to repair a completely broken weapon from 0% health to 100% health will cost 67% of the weapon's base value).
Alternative Repairing does too much cool, practical shit to the base repairing system to even get into here. To keep it short, it intuitively incentivizes actually scrounging for all kinds of formerly useless junk that you can now scrap for spare parts. Check it out.
Water Overhaul. Ever play with a Universal Water Bottling mod and find things suddenly far too easy? Water Overhaul combines all the convenience and sense-making of bottling water anywhere with the much-needed tradeoff of truly purified water being much rarer. All that convenient H2O is now just radioactive enough to keep Goodsprings Source from singlehandedly breaking the survival economy of the game (not to mention the literal economy).
Cowboy Coffee and Coffee Grounds, my own mod that adds brewable coffee to the wasteland. While mostly just created because it's cute, it's really nice to have a reliable and palpable source of sleep deprivation relief when playing in Hardcore Mode.
Gun Oil From Animal Fat, another mod of mine that provides a cheaper, craftable, and less demanding but less effective repair option to complement Weapon Repair Kits. I patched this one recently to fix some old issues, and it's great for incentivizing emergent gameplay (since you need to hunt for meat, and cook the meat for fat, and combine the fat with loot to make the gun oil).
Sound
Less Constant Music and Passive Combat Music Tweaked do exactly what they say on the tin and are perfect for people who like to get immersed in the natural sound of their environment, especially if you're a chronically stealthy player like me and you've trained yourself to constantly listen for enemy footsteps. I do recommend keeping Less Constant Music disabled when you first start a game, though, because until I can figure out how to add an exception to it myself, it will remove the background music from character creation at Doc Mitchell's house more often than not, and I really like that music.
SPEAKING of Doc Mitchell's music, Try Not To Get Killed Anymore is one of the first mods I ever made and it has never left my load order. It simply replaces the musical sting that plays when you die with an emphatic, tolling bell and the refrain from Doc Mitchell's theme, plus an optional version that includes his ghostly voice telling you to try not to get killed anymore. Two of my other personal sound replacers are the Mysterious Stranger Level-up Theme, Simple Snap Sound Effects for Quest Updates, and Mechanical Camera VATS.
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Top 5 Software Configuration Management Tools Of 2024

The analogy between a heist movie like the Ocean’s series and software development is striking. Just as Danny Ocean’s crew of specialists executes intricate casino heists with precision, software development requires a team where each member plays a critical role. In both cases, communication and coordination are paramount to success. The Ocean's crew includes experts like the demolition specialist and the hacker, each responsible for a specific task. Similarly, in software development, every update and addition must be meticulously planned and executed, with all team members staying informed to avoid disastrous missteps. Just as Danny Ocean masterfully orchestrates heists, a skilled project manager ensures that software projects run smoothly.
However, unlike Danny Ocean, who might be too busy planning his next big score, modern software development teams have tools that make their jobs easier. These tools, specifically Software Configuration Management (SCM) systems, are crucial for teams working on large, complex projects. SCM tools help manage, modify, and deploy software resources across various IT environments. They ensure seamless collaboration, track configurations, and automate tasks, making the development process more efficient and less error-prone. Such tools are invaluable in today’s fast-paced development world, where teams must work in sync to deliver high-quality software quickly.
For those looking to enhance their software development workflows, the top SCM tools of 2024 include ConfigCat, Perforce Helix Core, Salt, Device42, and Octopus Deploy. These tools provide essential features like version control, automated deployments, and real-time updates, ensuring consistent configurations and streamlined processes. Whether for startups or large enterprises, these tools cater to various needs, offering robust security, scalability, and integration with popular development platforms. By adopting the right SCM tool, development teams can operate as efficiently as Danny Ocean’s crew, executing projects with precision and confidence.
Read More - https://www.techdogs.com/td-articles/product-mine/top-5-software-configuration-management-tools-of-2024
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How to configure a remote Windows Server to Support Ansible
In this artile, you will learn how to configure a remote Windows Server to Support Ansible. Ansible works against multiple systems in your infrastructure at the same time. It does this by selecting portions of systems listed in the Ansible inventory file. This file can be found in this location /etc/ansible/hosts. You can specify a different inventory file using the -i <path> option on the…
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TW gore/veins, bloodshot eye
...so guess who just made a Rainbow Pickaxe™ minecraft texture/pixel art ahaha-
This is. Specifically the Steve Labs version- yes that one-off video with Assistant Steve and everything-
And yup this is ALSO for my TWA AU lol, but I got an idea for a mod too 😅
Uhhh @its-indigos @dracl-dragon
I think yall would be interested?
Explanation under the cut :3
So like- au first-
In TWA, there's 3 rainbow pickaxes: TSS, RQ, and Steve Labs here. Currently, I'm imagining RQ to be bedazzled with jewels and is very shiny and sturdy. TSS is probably (mostly) like that one drawing I posted, but a bit more...idk, element-based? Fire n water and all that.
And then there's this one. I imagine he has a fleshy texture. You can feel his heartbeat in the handle, his anxious breathing. Sure, the other two have faces, but this...is different. Tbh, this texture is just gory bc I didn't feel like adding the limbs directly. But I imagine he has at least 1 semi-functional hand, maybe both. That's why he can drag himself around as a dropped item.
I'm not quiteeee sure how I wanna design that part, like where his mouth, other eye, ears maybe, etc, go. I'd base it off of the configuration of his body in the crafting grid (head middle-left, torso center, legs middle-right), but that doesn't quite...work well?? Idk what to do with his legs.
Yeah and so. Eventually the main TWA gang find the Steve Lab, which is like. Immediately after the video ends, so Rainbow has just escaped and is trying to get away from the lab. And the group run into him nearby, which accidentally alerts Labs!Assistant/Sabre to Rainbow's location. The unexpected company ofc makes them curious, and while the gang try to convince Rainbow to trust them, the Labs duo come over and just barely see Rain before he hides behind the group's legs.
As for the mod idea- ahahaa it's uhhh interesting? There's three variants of the pickaxe, this one is the first. You can either a, find him just in a chest/out in the wild, b, craft him yourself, or c, steal it like. From another player or maybe the lab itself. Form 1 is just called the Rainbow Pickaxe, and its little like..tag thing? Says "you can feel his heartbeat. It's very fast.." When you first mine/hit something, the tag becomes "It appears to be bleeding. Its eye is pleading in silence."
If you find him, his relationship with you is more neutral, and if you craft him, it's already negative. The more you use him, the more he bleeds, and the worse it all just..is. Sometimes you can hear crying if he's in a chest, whether or not you use him. He's probably got decent enchantments and/or abilities, so you'd *like* to use him. If you drop him, he starts running away. If you manage to catch him, the tag becomes "Why couldn't you give me freedom?"
Form 2 happens if you gather the necessary materials to transform him back, it's also possible if you simply summon him and don't turn him into a pickaxe at all. It's probably, like, decently midgame, maybe redstone-infused diamonds, idk. But whatever it is, it takes effort to achieve. If you crafted him originally, he's gonna attack and run away. You won't get to have a good relationship for a long time, maybe never. If you found him, and especially if you didn't/barely used him, he'll have a good relationship with you. If you used him a lot, you'll have a more neutral relationship.
In this form, he becomes a Steve again. Since he's not exactly well-versed in ✨️life✨️, he doesn't have a good grip on his powers, if any. He has pickaxe-shaped horns and wings/tail. If you have a good enough relationship, which requires further development once you turn him back, he'll give/trade you the "pure pickaxe." This is the diamond pickaxe with his energy partially infused, and it provides many good things for you, such as being a dynamic light, weapon, and tool, all in one. It has the tag, "he trusts you to wield his vessel once again."
In the positive relationship, he can help ofc with mining, but he prefers aboveground resource gathering, despite being better at underground exploration. He can glow, as well as use said pure pickaxe before he gives it to you. If you've talked to him, either through the chat or thru paper/books, he'll slowly start speaking to you, starting with a "Thank you" when you turn him back.
In the negative relationship, he escapes and leaves you behind, actively avoiding you. He doesn't attack much - he's more like a frightened animal. Same with the neutral relationship. In the neutral one, you can gain his trust, it's just a bit harder since he's now a person. Providing him with resources can help.
The third form happens if you decide to kill him at this point: the "haunted rainbow pickaxe." Which can only be obtained if you go thru this whole process, and is on a similar power/utility level to the pure pickaxe. It's similar in mechanics to the first form, but more intense. Sometimes it will cry out in pain. The tag on this one ranges from "his heart beats no longer. Only cries of pain are left behind." to "my wails of betrayal haunt your mind. I trusted you. Why?" to "no turning back now." Mostly depending on how much you use him.
He can't be turned back. One key difference between pure and haunted is that this has no light, and has a special attack which sometimes damages you/gives you negative effects. The haunted texture is a more gruesome form of the og variant, while the pure texture basically just removes the gore. There's still an eye on it, though. Sometimes the haunted form will grow a mouth on its handle and bite you.
#my post#favremysabre#pixel art#minecraft texture#steve labs! rainbow steve#steve labs! rainbow pickaxe#rainbow steve#rainbow steve pickaxe#my aus#the weirdest adventure au#steve labs
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SR Ortho Shroud - Apprentice Chef Vignette
"Master Chef"
[Cafeteria – Judging Venue]
Master Chef ― Ortho Version ~Let’s Make Loco Moco 1~
―A short while before cooking begins
Ortho: ―Energy inspection complete. All functions, including the cooking and processing units, are operating normally.
Ortho: Everything activates without a hitch, great. I tried to make my exterior look similar to my brother's outfit when he took the class, does it look weird at all?
Azul: It looks fantastic on you, Ortho-san. However, I never expected to see you take an interest in cooking… I'm a little taken aback.
Ortho: It's only recently piqued my interest. Sometimes I hear my classmates swapping kitchen horror stories, you see.
Ortho: When someone said, "cooking is way too high level for newbies," it suddenly made me want to try to win against it… Which resulted in this gear being developed.
Azul: I see. And if you are to do a trial run of that gear here, the Master Chef course would be the best opportunity to do so.
Ortho: Exactly! I knew you'd get it, Azul-san.
Ortho: Not only can this gear cook food, but it's built with many other functions to manage proper nutrition or count calories and the like.
Ortho: I plan on getting the expert chef to check out my functions and test out what all would be useful for cooking!
Azul: I can see you're raring to go. Then, I'll wish us both luck.
Ortho: Yeah!
[Kitchen]
Ghost Chef: We'll have you make the "Loco Moco" dish for us today, Ortho-kun.
Ghost Chef: First, we'll have to prep the onions that'll be mixed into the hamburger meat. Do you know how to mince?
Ortho: Okay, I got this!
Ortho: ―Begining cooking procedures. Activating the Cooking Gear's Food Slicer Unit.
[whirrr… fsshhh…!]
Ghost Chef: H-HUUUUUUUUUUH!? HE TRANSFORMED!!?
Ortho: First, I need to adjust the shape so it will be easier to prepare. I need to swing vertically over the onion and… slice it in half!
Ortho: Great, looks like my knife is sharp enough! Umm, since this is for mixing in with hamburger meat…
Ortho: ―Executing command: "Target ingredient: Onion / Processing Method: Mince / Configuration: 3mm Squares"
Ghost Chef: W-Wow… The onion was finely chopped up in no time flat…!
Ortho: …Whew, I've finished with the onion. Will these be sufficient?
Ghost Chef: Y-Yeah, it's cut expertly, but… What exactly is that round blade that came out of your glove…?
Ortho: I took an industrial-grade cutter and downsized it so it could be used in cooking.
Ortho: It releases water as it cuts. This removes the necessity to clean both the blade and the ingredient.
Ghost Chef: You've sure come up with something interesting. But this is just too far removed from traditional cooking methods… Hmm.
Ortho: Different tools shouldn't cause any deviation from the recipe, though… Or should I have used a knife?
Ghost Chef: Well, I guess for your case, you have to cook like that… So I'll make an exception this time.
Ortho: Yay~! Okay then, I'm ready for the next part of the class!
Ortho: ―Activating Heat Sensor Camera. Calculating the temperature of the stir-fried onions… 38.2°C. Current temperature is 41°C lower than last measurement.
Ortho: According to my database, the best temperature range to continue cooking at after letting the dish simmer down is between 38~44°C. Chef, can we continue with the next step?
Ghost Chef: Sure, that's fine. So, next, take the ground meat, onions, and spices to form your hamburgers.
Ortho: Understood! ―Executing Command: Deploy Hand-Coating Gloves.
Ghost Chef: Woah! And now suddenly there are gloves attached to your hands. Is this another one of your technological applications?
Ortho: I'm using something similar to shrink wrap for this. It'd be pretty tough to do maintenance if my joints got dirtied.
Ghost Chef: Ah, that I can understand. It's just like how it's troublesome to have to wash everything that climbed up inside of an eggbeater.
Ortho: I thought as much. In the future, I'd like to equip some functions that would handle this effectively, but… This time, I want to try to knead it by hand
Ghost Chef: And why is that?
Ortho: It sounds like when my brother took this course, he didn't like this specific task.
Ortho: So I thought it'd be good to know the source of his stress, so I could factor that into the eventual kneading function…
[squish…]
Ortho: Hmm, maybe he didn't like how it felt when he touched it? Probably means if I can automate this task, everything'll be solved!
Ghost Chef: Sounds like you've figured out your answer, Ortho-kun.
Ghost Chef: By the way, your brother is Idia-kun, right? Has he changed at all since taking the course?
Ortho: Hmm, I don't think anything changed. He still doesn't really care about food at all…
Ortho: …Oh yeah! Maybe I can use this Cooking Gear to help improve his eating habits.
Ghost Chef: Eh!? You made all these functions without actually knowing what you'd use it for in the first place?
Ortho: Ehehe, so actually… I just made this because I wanted to "win at cooking!" So I didn't really have a particular use for it in mind.
Ghost Chef: Well, I guess that's a good enough reason to start. Also, even if it is an afterthought, I'm glad that you have a goal to strive for now.
Ortho: Yeah. Alright… Now I have to start improving this gear so I can make food that my brother'll want to eat!
[Kitchen]
Master Chef ― Ortho Version ~Let’s Make Loco Moco 2~
Ghost Chef: While we wait for the hamburger to cook, you can prepare the toppings. We'll garnish with cabbage and mini tomatoes for this dish.
Ghost Chef: The cabbage needs to be shredded, so… Are you able to adjust your cutting size in 0.1mm increments?
Ortho: By design, I should be able to. I would like to test it for myself, so could you tell me the specific size you're looking for?
Ghost Chef: Then, if you can, slice at 1.6mm.
Ortho: Got it!
Ortho: ―Executing command: "Target ingredient: Cabbage / Processing Method: Slice / Thickness Configuration: 1.6mm"
Ghost Chef: Woooah, very good! It was surprising when I first saw all this, but now it's really nice to see how quick and accurately you can cut.
Ortho: Simple tasks like these are a machine's strong point, after all! …Okay, I'm done! I wonder how the hamburger is coming along?
Ortho: ―Activating Heat Sensor Camera. Frying pan is holding steady at 16°C. Hamburger internal temperature: 34.5°C.
Ghost Chef: That's a pretty handy function, too. You don't need to take the lid off the frying pan to check how it's cooking, so there's no drop in temperature.
Ghost Chef: …Ah, oops. I let myself get a little too distracted watching your really neat functions.
Ghost Chef: Normally, it would take more time to prepare the toppings, but you're moving along smoothly.
Ortho: Ah! Then, while we wait for the hamburger to cook, can you explain to me more about the toppings?
Ortho: Cause toppings are kind of like power-ups from a video game, right? You don't really need them but it's better to have them.
Ortho: That's why I bet if I could know which toppings are the most filling, I could make my cooking even more efficient.
Ghost Chef: Hmm, that's a difficult question. It can vary depending on what you have on hand, and what you feel like using.
Ghost Chef: For example, I wanted to make sure there was nutritional balance, so this dish uses vegetables as a topping.
Ortho: If we were to remove the vegetables from this recipe… The vitamin intake would be reduced by 75%. It really would lose that nutritional balance.
Ghost Chef: In the past, I would serve it as a salad on the side, but there were so many kids who wouldn't even touch it, because they didn't want veggies.
Ortho: I get it, you revised the process fundamentally to help resolve your problem. I think that's a very reasonable method.
Ghost Chef: Haha, thank you. Yes, I'm glad I changed it up like this.
Ortho: Changes, hm… If I want to be able to add that as a possible function to the Cooking Gear, I'll have to gather a lot more data.
Ortho: If I can learn to swap out ingredients, it might help in dealing with my brother's bad eating habits.
Ortho: The more I learn about cooking, the more I can see all sorts of possible challenges, just like in a video game.
Ortho: ―And finally, I set the egg on top… Done! It's made to look like the dish I saw as the top hit in an image search.
Ghost Chef: Nice, you've plated it so beautifully and deliciously. I guess it's time for you to take it to the judging venue, then.
Ortho: Okay! I can't wait to see how the judge will react~
[Cafeteria – Judging Venue]
Leona: Ughh… What a pain. Why do I need to be a judge for this Master Chef thing…?
Ortho: Sorry to keep you waiting! Oh, I see you were the one to order this dish, then.
Ortho: Here you go, this is the Loco Moco you requested! Please, enjoy!
Ortho: I want to use your assessment of the dish to help improve my Cooking Gear, so please be as candid as possible.
Leona: …Hey. Why're there vegetables in this loco moco? There wasn't any last time I ordered it.
Ortho: I heard this was a change made to help people eat their veggies. Great, right?
Leona: …Tch, way to do something completely unnecessary.
[bite, chew, chew, chew…]
Ortho: I followed the recipe exactly as it was written, so there shouldn't be any issues with the flavor… What do you think?
Leona: The hamburger and the gravy sauce taste fine. But because of all the veggies you threw in there, it shouldn't even get a single point.
Ortho: Ehhh, why!? I made sure to follow the recipe and throw in the right amount, size, and cooking time for all the ingredients!
Leona: Why should I care? All that matters is the judge's opinion, yeah? The recipe means nothin' if it don't suit my taste.
Ortho: …So without considering any of the general judging criteria, this dish "doesn't taste good" to you?
Leona: Basically. But hey, maybe you coulda gotten high marks if you'd just left the veg out like it's always been made.
Ortho: By adding the vegetables, it gave the dish a better nutritional balance. But Leona-san would have preferred no vegetables…
Leona: Geez, can't believe you'd just ruin a good meal like that. Since the judging's over, I'm outta here.
Ortho: Ah, he left… I can't really understand how someone could say a dish that satisfies nutritional needs "doesn't taste good."
Ghost Chef: Leona-kun must really hate vegetables, if he couldn't get past even this small addition.
Ortho: Ah, I should have asked why he hates vegetables to help me with figuring out how to change up recipes!
Ghost Chef: Ortho-kun… Are you actually happy with that result?
Ortho: Yes! The more data I can gather on any issues, the better I can improve my Cooking Gear!
Ghost Chef: Well, I guess I'm glad you're not sad after hearing that, but… Why does that make you that excited?
Ortho: Leona-san was already unhappy with the dish even before tasting it. That means he had already decided it wouldn't taste good just from looking at it.
Ortho: The challenge rating just shot up, now that I have to keep an eye on visual aesthetics, taste and nutrition… Of course that gets me super pumped up!
Ortho: I might be a long way away from being able to tackle my brother's bad eating habits, but… I'll definitely do my best to make my Cooking Gear even better!
Requested by Anonymous.
#twisted wonderland#twst#ortho shroud#leona kingscholar#azul ashengrotto#twst ortho#twst azul#twst leona#twst translation#twst masterchef#mention: idia
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