#I DID SHIT ON THE EXAM LAST TERM AS WELL. I wanted to make up for it so bad

[shewhoeatssand]

lost something like 0.07 cents in tissues over this fuck ass physics assignment. Tell Me Why I Spend 38 Minutes Figuring Out How To Fix An Uncertainty Of 130%. 15 minutes copy pasting an image. 3 days trying to figure out how I do uncertainties and apply them to my data set because I am stupid as hell. It’s not even done. I was maybe halfway. it was a final

[redeemingvillains]

veritaserum - mattheo riddle

summary: when mattheo drinks veritaserum on a bet, he's confident he doesn't have anything to hide... until you show up.

word count: 3.1k

a/n: gosh i love this messy boy. just a little something sweet + fun!

"I don't know... shouldn't we save it for something... important?"

"Like, what Blaise?" Malfoy responded, exasperated.

"Yeah, got any plans you want to share?" Theo asked.

"All ears, bud" Mattheo joined in.

Blaise threw his hands up. "Fine, fuck it, do what you want with it" he said, resigned, referring to the small vial in Malfoy's hand that had the group's rapt attention as they huddled in the corner of their dormitory like they were first years at a sleepover.

"We should put it in somebody's goblet at dinner."

"We should slip it into Dumbledore's cup, Merlin knows what the geezer would say."

Theo got a wicked look on his face, "I'll give any of you lot 100 galleons to drink it."

Eyes widened around their circle at that.

"You're joking."

"Piss off."

"No, listen to me, we think we know everything about each other, don't we?" Theo continued, letting the sentiment linger "Which means the things we don't know are deep."

He grabbed the vial from Malfoy and dangled it in front of them; Veritaserum, the most powerful truth serum in the wizarding world, even having it in their possession was breaking about 15 Ministry laws.

Members of the group stared shiftily at one another, but Theo found Mattheo's gaze staring boldly at him as he leaned casually against his four-poster, a smirk on his face.

"Make it 200 and you've got yourself a deal" Mattheo grinned.

Snickers of laughter took the group as they punched one another in amusement and excitement.

"Bottoms up" Theo said, tossing the vial at him.

"I've got nothing to hide" Mattheo replied with an air of emblazoned confidence as he deftly popped the cork and threw the liquid back like a shot of firewhiskey before anyone could stop him.

It didn't taste like anything other than water, and for a moment Mattheo thought this was the easiest 200 galleons he'd ever make, but then he felt a sort of bubbling in his chest, like every feeling, every sentence he'd ever held back wanted to burst forth.

"...Well?" asked Malfoy, cautiously, leaning in, "How do you feel?"

"Bloody weird" Mattheo said, looking down at the empty vial in his hand. "And apprehensive, like I definitely don't want you to ask me things." His eyes widened at the words that had come so truthfully and vulnerably out of his mouth before he could stop them, suddenly realizing that he'd made a horrible mistake.

Theo was howling with laughter, leaning in and rubbing his hands together as he got ready to obliterate his best friend for being so cocky; he was going to make every galleon worth it.

"Did you take Blaise's Chudley Cannons scarf last term?" he asked.

"Yup, sold it to a fifth year for a bag of weed— SHIT" Mattheo said quickly, eyes wide before slapping a hand over his mouth.

"Mate, what the fuck?—" Blaise started, but Theo was on a tear.

"—Did you cheat off of Lorenzo's potions exam this week?"

"Of course" Mattheo admitted, the words blasting by his hand, "I've been doing it since fourth year, his handwritings the size of my fist, thanks for that by the way" he said, looking at Enzo.

"Prego, amico" Lorenzo said smiling and shrugging, "happy to help."

"Alright then" Blaise said, the anger and frustration clear in his voice as he eyed Mattheo, "better own up, didn't you slip McLaggen a galleon to let Theo score on him last match?"

"Yeah, fuck, and I'm not sorry about it. I'm tired of hearing Theo piss and complain about losing when he barely shows up to practice and lets the rest of us down."

"OOHHH!" shouted several of the guys.

"Fucking harsh mate!!"

"What the fuck?!?" Theo shouted angrily as he lunged for Mattheo and the others tried to hold him back.

Amidst the shouting and commotion, they didn't hear you knock on the door.

"Guys?" you asked, raising your voice to be heard.

Five heads turned your way as they stopped mid-brawl and began to stand up and right themselves, adjusting their ties and smoothing their robes. For his part, Mattheo's heart nearly shot out of his chest. No, no no no not right now he thought as you pushed your way into their room. On any other occasion he'd be thrilled to see you, but now the bubbling in his chest was reaching its peak at the sight of his deepest, most tightly held secret: you, and every single thing he felt about you.

He took in your amused smile, the light laughter on your lips, the way it made your eyes sparkle and he felt his palms tingle with sweat as he grasped them into fists and swallowed deeply, like he could ingest his own thoughts. You were his best friend, had been since the moment he met you on his first train ride to Hogwarts and he had no illusions about ruining your friendship by trying for anything else; girls like you didn't end up with guys like him.

"Are you alright?" you asked, looking at him strangely before his friends chimed in for him.

"S'fine!"

"Yeah, yeah!"

"Never better!"

"What do you need, love?"

"I am NOT fine!" Mattheo said boldly and rather loudly before he could stop himself and your eyes shot to him with concern.

"Wait, what's wrong Matty?" you asked, using the nickname he only tolerated coming from you.

He pursed his lips tightly and shook his head, averting his eyes to the floor, physically warring with the words that were flooding his subconscious.

What's wrong? A lot of things are wrong, YN. For starters, I love you. I love you so much it physically pains me to spend as much time as we do together and not to grab your hand, to pull you onto my lap, to nuzzle into your neck, to kiss you; I have a list of things I want to do to you every time I see you. Especially in that godsdamn skirt you're wearing. It's my favorite. You should know that. And I wish you would stop wearing it, you have no idea the ways guys look at you. I wish you'd wear it only for me. I wish you'd want me the way I want you, because I want you so badly. I wish you were mine, but I'm scared, no, fucking terrified of the way I feel about you because love is vulnerability and vulnerability is weakness and I can't tell you any of this so please, please don't ask me anything and please, please stop looking at me like that.

"Matty?" you asked again, now thoroughly concerned as your best friend slammed his hands over his ears as you walked towards him.

Theo was burning hot with anger, stewing over what Mattheo had said about him, he wanted to take him down a notch, to embarrass him in return. "Admit it" he interrupted, staring at Mattheo "you have a thing for Pansy and you've tried to make a move on her even though she's with Draco."

You stopped short of approaching Mattheo and stared at Theo.

"What?" you whispered, feeling physically ill, jealous and hurt even though you had no such right.

Mattheo straightened up and glared at Theo.

"What the fuck did you just say?!" Draco said, brushing past you as he came for Mattheo.

"I'm right, aren't I?" Theo pushed further, so smug, so certain he was right.

"No you fucking prat" Mattheo spat at him.

Draco grabbed Mattheo by the front of his robes. "You swear it, you haven't made a move on her?"

"I swear it."

"Not even before we were dating?" Malfoy pressed.

"Not even before you were dating" Mattheo confirmed.

"What the fuck is going on?" you said, exasperated, almost to yourself as you tried to calm down.

"Veritaserum" Blaise said by way of explanation as he leaned in to be heard over the continued shouting of your friends. "Theo bet one of us to drink it and, well..." he said, gesturing his hand by way of explanation at the calamity in front of you.

Malfoy was shouting questions at Mattheo who looked genuinely surprised if not annoyed, and Enzo was looking back and forth at them like it was a tennis match. Theo had a deeply skeptical look on his face as he listened on, "No, you're always weird around Pansy and YN though, I thought..." then, like a lightbulb went off, Theo looked at you, to Mattheo and back again.

"Do you think Pansy's hot?" Malfoy continued.

"Bro, give it up" Blaise said finally, stepping to pull him back, "I think you're in the clear."

"I mean yeah she's hot, but she's not my type. FUCK!" Mattheo replied, rubbing a hand over his face at the admission.

"She's not, but YN is" Theo said finally.

Mattheo bit his bottom lip and stared at the floor, concentrating very hard on the tassels of the rug beneath his feet as he shook his head, a grimace on his face.

Your heart trilled in your chest, which was literally rising and falling in both panic and excitement. Mattheo was shaking his head no, but his whole body was fighting something, there was something he didn't want to say... about you.

"So, she's not your type? Not attractive to you at all?" Theo pushed.

Mattheo's face was turning a dark shade of red as pursed his lips closed and shook his head vehemently, refusing to meet anyone's eyes, his own nearly watering with the exertion of fighting the potion within him.

"Totally platonic? Didn't give a shit when Seamus Finnegan asked her out last term?"

Mattheo glanced at Theo, gathering himself, as he tried desperately to say the only truth he wanted to share. "He's a prick, no secret I didn't think it was a good idea—"

"—You never told me that" you said quietly, confused, and not a little bit angry. "But you avoided me for a few weeks after, I remember..." you said, trailing off as you stepped closer to him, and Mattheo's looked genuinely afraid, outstretching his hands to stop you from coming any closer.

"What don't you want to say?—"

"—I don't want you here right now!" he said loudly.

You physically reared back at the harshness of his words. You caught his eye, trying to communicate the way you often did with one another, to ask things that could only be said without words, but you got nothing in response.

"R-Right" you said, your voice wobbling as you turned to leave, thoroughly embarassed.

And the sound of it nearly broke Mattheo's heart.

"Wait, wait, I didn't meant it like that, I don't want you to be upset, please don't be upset" he said, moving to reach for your hand urgently, the unmasked care and compassion in his voice making you turn and making Draco and Blaise bat at each other's arms in excitement like school girls at the scene unfolding in front of them.

"I don't want you to hear my truth" Mattheo said quietly, and just like that it was just the two of you, you who knew more than any of these idiots, you knew about Blaise's scarf (you had told him not to sell it), about him cheating in potions and paying off McLaggen, but even you didn't know his most deeply held secret and this isn't how he wanted it to come out.

"Please" he begged, in way none of his friends had ever heard him speak before.

"I just... I thought I knew all of your truths?" you said vulnerably, your chin wobbling, saddened at the idea that there was a part of him you didn't know.

"You don't. I'm sorry" he said simply.

"But they get to hear them?" you said, gesturing towards your friends.

"No, they don't know them either."

"What would be so bad that you wouldn't want anyone in your life to know, Matty?"

He bit his tongue as he tilted his head. "It isn't bad. I didn't say it was bad" he said.

You could tell he was playing with you, selectively choosing his words. Your curiosity piqued as you turned to face him fully with your arms crossed.

"What don't you want us to know?" you asked.

"How I — FUCK — feel — mmhmm" he tried to physically shove the words back into his mouth, clapping his hands over his mouth again as his body betrayed him.

Theo stepped forward, trying to pry his hands back. "Say it!" he said.

Mattheo tried to wiggle out of his grasp, the two of them thrashing back and forth.

"C'mon mate, time to earn those galleons! Cough it up! How you feel about what?" and Theo yanked Mattheo's hands away from his mouth just long enough for Mattheo to all but shout:

"HER!" he said, loudly, pointing to you. "About YN. I — FUCK — fucking love her."

You could have heard an owl feather hit the floor.

"Oh shit" Malfoy whispered.

Theo took a step back as he realized the enormity of what he'd just done. He'd thought Mattheo had a little crush on you, I mean, didn't they all? He thought it was just a bit of fun. But love? He'd know Mattheo for 7 years and he never so much as heard him say the word, let alone direct it at another person, in fact he knew just how much the concept had been beaten out of him as a child.

"Mate, I'm—" he started.

Mattheo glared at him in way that reminded you for a moment about the family he came from, and it was the first time you'd ever seen Theo genuinely afraid as the smile dropped from his lips and he took an unconscious step back.

"Fuck you" Mattheo said, stepping towards him, the measured control in his voice somehow more frightening than the alternative. "You always take shit too far, you know that? That's why—"

"—Matty?" you said, your quiet whisper and the questions that lingered behind it tugging at his heart and pulling his attention back to you.

He met your eyes and the fury he felt at Theo dissolved in an instant, like it had apparated from the room, because the way you were looking at him was an expression he'd only seen in his dreams. You didn't look angry or confused, you weren't laughing or embarrassed, the sparkle in your eye was back and a soft smile rested on your lips, your eyes were blown wide, hopeful even, with a hint of something else underneath that had a sensation like melted honey spreading throughout his entire body.

"Can we maybe talk... outside...?" you asked.

"Yes, for the love of the gods" he said, walking quickly to your side, letting his hand rest gently at your back, the intimate gesture not lost on anybody as your friends wolf-whistled and snickered and he flipped them the finger over his head.

Now that the truth was out, there was nothing stopping the words that flew out of Mattheo's mouth as you led him to a nearby secluded corridor.

"I really want to talk to you about this" he said, the moment you were outside of the dormitory, "I am so embarrassed that it came out that way, that's not at all how I wanted to tell you, well, I didn't want to tell you at all, I was terrified actually. I've liked you for a long time, really since the first day we met, do you remember? On the train? You were wearing that blue jumper, you smelled like cinnamon and vanilla... You always smell so fucking good—"

You laughed as you pulled him with greater urgency by the hand away from prying eyes as he continued to ramble on, the truth serum creating a veritable waterfall of words out of his mouth.

"—You're so fucking beautiful, I love your hair, your eyes, your smile, your nose... that sounds weird, but it's true, it's so fucking cute—"

"—Mattheo" you said, as you stopped, placing your hands on his chest and pressing him gently against the stone wall to get him to slow down. "Breathe."

He shook his head.

"No, it's out now, and I don't know how long this shit lasts and if I don't say this stuff now, I'm not sure I'll ever have the balls to say it to your face, I've held onto this for 7 years YN."

Your lips curled into a small pout at how sweet he was being, at the idea that your best friend had been pining for you since you were 11 years old.

"I love you" he continued breathlessly, "and not like a little bit. Like, a lot. I don't know..." he said, carding his hand through his brown curls, "I've never felt this way about anyone, anything. I'm all consumed with you. You're the only thing I think about, the only girl I want, I'd do anything for you. And I'm sorry if this is going to totally wreck our friendship, if you want things to stay the way they are, I will try my level best—"

But his words were cut short as you pressed your lips to his, capturing his truth, letting it wash over you, every word you had been desperate to hear, every thought you'd shared the same. It surprised him for only a second before his hands grasped your face and he pulled you further into him.

"You're fucking perfect" he whispered after a moment, his eyes dancing over your features.

"Remind me again why I didn't give you veritaserum like years ago?" you said, smiling against his lips.

"It's a felony?" he said, laughing.

"...Right" you said, laughing back.

You were only gone a few minutes, but as you scurried back to the dormitory you tried to fix your hair, and wipe the lipgloss off of Mattheo's face as he smiled down at you with puppy dog eyes.

"They're going to lose their mind" you said quietly just outside the door, "let's just play it cool, alright?"

And before he could respond that there was no way on earth he could possibly do that, you pushed the door open and all conversation stopped.

"...Alright?" Theo asked, turning to face you both, nervous at the potential mess he may have caused.

"Fine, we were just talking—"

"—She macked me!!" Mattheo shouted truthfully with a huge grin on his face as he wrapped his arm around you.

You gasped and swatted at him playfully, your cheeks blushing a rosy pink as your friends erupted into cheers, hoot and hollers, descending on you both as Mattheo looked down at you, glowing, happier than you could ever remember seeing him.

taglist: @girllblogging777, @iamdnb, @bookworm124, @zatannasrealgf, @r-a-c-h-e-l

[skvrpion]

Study Buddy [M] Oneshot

tw: drug paraphernalia, swearing, general filthiness

“this just something sweet for the fucking kids okay” - Auntie Fee

“London you just came over here to study, that’s it.”

London was quietly berating herself in the bathroom mirror, fingers nervously twirling the same braid she’d been messing with since 8 that night.

It was now 11PM and she was heavily contemplating sucking the skin off of Terrance Richmonds dick – the polite gentleman who was currently waiting on her to return back to their study session in his living room.

The original plan was to come over and prepare for her last midterm of the week, the most heavily dreaded exam in her program to date. Everyone she knew who’d previously taken advanced calculus with Professor Malkin bombed this particular test – everyone but Terrance who’d scathed by with a 92, a low for him but still a pass, nevertheless. For the last few semesters he was known solely around the quad as a mousy brainiac, rarely seen but always heard of from both administration and the incoming PhD students desperate for help.

London herself initially became acquainted with him during a freshman Biology class and for weeks he without question covered her ass when she was running behind, scrambling into her seat with Starbucks, hopes and a dream that she’d be able to catch up to their lectures. What started as frequent texts regarding academia trickled into casual conversation and before they knew it, they were what most people considered close friends. Close in the context that they rarely saw each other outside of the confines of their library’s study rooms, but chatted enough through texts that they knew mostly every mundane thing about each other. No one on campus – including London – thought much of him looks wise until he returned from study abroad an entirely different person.

Over the course of his summer internship in Thailand, he’d bulked up match his staggering height, caught a tan, and traded his scruffy look for a more polished cut low fade and goatee. Though it didn’t sound like much, his confidence had shot up tenfold, and in less than three months he came back to campus an entirely new person. It was noticeable by everyone he’d come across again, his dimpled smile and deadly charm were infectious. Frankly, it made most people want to throw their panties at him; London was one of those people, and here she was ready to send her thong flying.

“Aye, you good in there?”

London almost jumped out of her skin when he knocked on the door. It’d been a solid ten minutes since she disappeared, and he was worried something had happened.

“Oh yeah, I’m fine! I saw something stupid on Twitter and lost track of time.”

“Aight.”

Flushing the empty toilet, London opened the door and awkwardly came face to face with Terry noting the tightly rolled blunt tucked in his ear.

“Is that..a funky ass grape Swisher?”

“Uh yeah,” he smiled innocently, “does the same thing them weird vegan wraps do.”

“It’s not weird. It’s called having taste and being health conscious. Swishers taste like shit.”

“To you.” He said while trailing her back into the living room. London's long forgotten study guide and scratch papers were still spread across the table with no chance of making anything higher than a 67 in sight. It didn’t help that she’d given up on studying ten minutes into being that damn close to him - equally blamed on his piercing seafoam eyes and cologne.

“Well…it’s safe to say my brain is cooked. I mean you did great; it’s just not sticking. I’m sorry T.” London pouted earnestly, “ I really didn’t mean to take up your whole night with this shit.”

“I told you it’s aight, wasn’t like I had shit going anyway. You’ll be fine, even if you bomb it you got enough cushion to bring it to a 75 by the end of term. C’s make degrees, right?.” He nodded before dipping back into the couch, lighting his blunt. To save herself from getting more flustered London focused her attention on cleaning her mess up and shoved her papers into her bag. Watching a nigga smoke was top two and not two in her turn on list – it was actually how she got caught up with running behind he who shan’t me named a month badk. It was really her fault for dating frat, but then again that wasn’t the point of her current affliction.

As soon as she zipped her bag up the smell of chronic seized her nose, Terrance was offering her the blunt as a kind gesture seeing she was going to be stressed the fuck out the rest of the weekend. Knowing she had to be home soon, London contemplated taking him up on her offer. Her group chat would question the hell out of her if she disappeared this late, which would lead to a fight over whether or not she was with her ex.

Terrance wasn’t her ex though.

“Fuck it.” She thought aloud as she accepted the free smoke.

It’d only been three days’ since she last partook – however – whatever Terry had managed to sneak through customs was so strong it tightened her lungs the second she inhaled. Quickly passing (more like flinging) the swisher back to him, she made a dash for her Stanley cup on the counter, shooting him daggers as he flashed his signature cheeky laugh.

Though her burning throat London rasped a “Where the fuck is that from?”

“Being honest? Some hole in the wall in Bangkok; looked better than the shit I had back here for half the price so I bit.”

“Uh huh,” she huffed through ringing ears, “I think I’ll stick to my prerolls.”

Nodding humbly, Terry ghosted the cloud of smoke leaving his lips and briefly turned to retrieve the TV remote. As much as London wanted to continue the banter all she could do was stare lustful rings of fire into him. He was doing nothing out of the ordinary – smoking and surfing Crunchyroll for some anime she was sure to forget – and yet London still wanted to burst into a ball of flames. Whatever happened to him when he left the states was out of this world; it was mind boggling how normal he continued to act despite turning into an unrecognizable hunk of his former self. For what felt like an eternity she couldn’t help but to scan every muscle adorning his frame. That was until his familiar baritone brought her back down to Earth

“London…let me ask you something?”

Shit.

“Why you keep staring like that?”

London tried to play dumb,“What? I just wrecked my brain with equations for hours and hit a rillo’, if I’m staring at you it’s because I’m high and tired.” she mouthed back

“Nah, that’s not what I mean,” he chuckled, “you keep giving me that look.”

“What look, Terrance?”

There was a deafening silence between the two as he ashed his smoke out on the coffee table ashtray. London’s head was now swimming from the additional contact high in the room and the signal he was sending off was insane– to her his playful demeanor had shifted to something deeper in what felt like mere seconds.

Arms folded, London insisted on pretending nothing was happening and proceeded to take a seat back on the couch, this time away from him to keep up the act.

“What look was I giving you Terry?” She said while glaring at him. She watched him exhale with a grin and darkly catch her glance.

“You know I’m not stupid right,” he started, “we been cool for what? Three, four years now and I know you London. You only give somebody that look when you tryna cut – and don’t bullshit me cause you know I’m right.”

She wanted to scream. He was absolutely right and putting her on the spot like it was nothing. Had he done this before? She couldn’t tell and her mind was beginning to race with all sorts of unholy thoughts.

“Look, I know I shouldn’t be putting you on blast like that but it’s obvious… and you ain’t the first person I had this conversation with.”

“Oh, okay. Well…what usually happens after this conversation?” stiffly said London. It was the most she could get out with a straight face.

“We either laugh about it and pretend it never happened, or…” he trailed off.

“Or what?”

Terrance simply eyed the television and deadpanned while continuing his statement.

“We fuck and call it a night. That’s up to you though.”

London couldn’t think straight, hell she couldn’t think at all while processing what the fuck he just said. For a second, she thought he was joking, but considering the growing wet spot in her shorts couldn’t live with herself if she didn’t at least try.

“Oh...sooooo like..before or after the movie?”

————

Terry and London attempted to get through the first episode of Baki - that only lasted through the first arc though. As soon as London's body pressed into his broad side, his lips found themselves on her, anime be damned.

In the moment tried to stifle her moans but quickly faltered once she realized they were alone: no roommates, no problems. Pecking up to her face and stopped to hover at her lips, glaring her in the eye – one hand gripping her cheek and the other tugging at the hem of her button up.

Between soft kisses fluttering her lower jaw Terry mumbled a grumbly, “You sure?”

London could only nod and melt into every single peck they exchanged. Little moans seeped out of her glossed lips and into his own as he popped the buttons on her tank top one by one; it did nothing to hide her lack of a bra and that had admittedly been driving him wild since she’d gotten there. Truth be told he Terry liked her - honestly wanted her as bad as she did him but couldn’t dare lead her on like that knowing who she was with. Why things ended the way they did and how badly he wanted to break her ex nigga jaw for embarrassing his friend like that. With the cards now off the table he had no reason to hold back anymore, and that he no longer would do.

Terrance took a freed umber nipple into his mouth and softly glided his hand past the bands of her cotton shorts. She was painfully warm, her voice raising an octave as he circled her clit with the pad of his thumb. The way her face turned up with each slow drag was as mesmerizing as it was arousing, her eyes never leaving his as she struggled to form coherent thoughts.

“Knew I had you wet,” he said while turning his attention to pulling her bottoms off, “whatchu’ wanna do, you gone let me taste it?”

London nodded to keep from screaming. Foreplay was unfortunately new to her and she’d grown accustomed to her man getting a quick nut and going to sleep, her pleasure be damned. Being teased like this made her absolutely crumble. In a lustful haze London watched Terrance peel his shirt off – then drop his sweats to reveal the thick log tucked across the leg of his boxers.

To her chagrin his face was already between her thighs before she could register the type of night she was in for. In one gentle sweep he pulled her panties to the side and prompt my went to work eating her pussy – thick lips suctioning her clit first to rouse her, then relaxing to lick a stinging stripe up her glistening folds.

“Oh fuck.” Was all she could breathe.

She was soaking wet and throbbing across his tongue, her clit rock solid from the sensation; he was attentive, seafoam iris’ diliating and fluttering as he explored her lips. London almost immediately felt an orgasmic wave creeping up her spine as he sopped her up, however, she was determined not to fuck it up and cum this early in.

Her body wasn’t taking that waiting on that shit though. One sharp shudder after another and she was unwinding all over him and his plush couch, nails raking across his back and eyes clamping shut. Clocking her in intending orgasm, Terry groaned into her clit, vibrations setting off a moan that cut deep from London’s vocal chords. Terrance let her loosen the grip on his head before delivering a messy, slick kiss to her mouth to quell her whimpering. London sucked herself up weakly - the taste adding to her overstimulation as she tried her hardest to recover from her first orgasm. She cut him the craziest look when she settled.

“Who– when the fuck did you learn that?” She rasped, fixating her attention to his now obvious poking erection.

Between a playful shrug, Terry bit her bottom lip and , pulling away to take off his boxers. Every vein trailing his arms and pelvis were rushed full of blood as his dick sprang out of confinement, tapping his stomach and garnering a gasp from London.

She couldn’t believe her fucking eyes; their entire friendship Terry had been hiding all of this dick and was now about to put it in her. Her first thought with a stranger was always a condom – however – tonight she was stuck on stupid and wanted to feel all of it. Raw. Taking no pause London lazily shifted her legs back and waited for him to tear her shit up - prompting Terry to lightly chuckled and shake his head no.

“You want it that bad huh? C’mon, we gon’ need some more room than this. And a rubber, freaky ass frog.”

Once best friends - always best friends.

In one effortless swoop Terrance hoisted London off the couch, hoisting her over his left shoulder marching them to his bedroom. He stopped momentarily to fish a Skyn from his side drawer, then hoisted her down to his neatly made bed. His sheets were pitch black and cold enough to make her perk up from the head-drunk coma she’d been in. She had no time to get adjusted either, as soon as her legs reopened Terrance was back assaulting her clit with his thumb.

She dragged out a “Terry please.” and watched in anguish as he stroked the condom on above her. He looked almost ethereal with his eyes falling down her frame hungrily, muscles contracting, and veins hardened in heat. Giving her a devilish smile Terrance hooked his arm around her left leg and softly ran the head of his dick up and down her folds.

“Please what?” he asked. His free hand snaked its way to her throat and slowly pressed the sides of neck in as she spoke.

“I said please what?” he demanded louder.

A whimpering London strained “P-please T.”

“What’s my name?”

“Terra-“

That was all she could get out before Terrance slid inside of her to the hilt. She could only gasp as he filled her up, her walls gripping his dick with a ferocity, engraving the memory for later. For the first time that night Terry cocked his head back and audibly moaned, making London’s walls grip him up coaxing another one out of him.

He was so fucking nasty.

“I’m finna fuck you up.” He uttered before winding back and stroking into her. Words were no longer forming on London’s tongue at this point, just strained whines of pleasure as Terrance stroked into her, deeply. Their foreheads touched as her hands snapped to brace his arms, the pairs eyes locked together as he slow pounded her leaking core, kissing her deeply as he picked up the pace.

In the moments he let go to admire the mess they were making London’s eyes lulled deep into the back of her head, her grip on his arm loosening at every thrust he made. The way her dollish brown eyes bore into his with each snap of his hips, how she dug her nails into his wrists, how wet and sticky her folds were becoming around his shaft with each pressing moment.

Terrance usually cared to be a tease, however, it was clear neither of them would be making it far tonight. Beneath him London was close cumming again, Terry hoping he could make her hold out for him just a little longer. He needed to stay in it.

“I can’t – fuck I can’t t-“

“Hold on, hold on,” he groaned, pecking at her parted lips, “ just breathe, wait for me Lo. You gone wait for me?”

That whiny baritone made London’s legs tremble around him. There was no way she could stop a second creeping orgasm from knocking her clean the fuck out far before he got to that point. Both gently and quickly, Terry pulled out, flipped her over and wrapped his hand in her braids. With her back arched deep, her weeping core completely exposed, London could only whine back at him as he tugged her by the nape of the neck back to rest in his shoulder, his right hand anchoring her to his slick skin by gripping her throat.

His dick then found its way back inside of her and started hitting an angle she hadn’t felt in months. He wasn’t jack hammering her shit but he damn sure wasn’t going as soft as he had earlier. Between their moans he could hear the sound of her ass smacking against his thighs. Her curves rippled under the pressure of his strokes and his dick was twitching out of control for release.

Blinded again by pleasure filled tears, London could barely hear him as he rattled off curses into her ear and smacked the everliving fire out of her ass. She reached behind her and pulled Terrance in as close as she could, nails harshly scratching up the nape of his neck - a familiar warmth rising from her lower stomach with each earth shattering, sloppy wet strokes.

She begged him,“Terry…p-please. F-fuck right there don’t stop, dontfuckingstop-.”

“Think you got enough,” he snarled through grit teeth, “let me feel that shit Lo...there you go.”

That was all she needed to hear; as the floodgates opened London’s entire body jerked – from her core to the tip of her fingers she completely lost control, walls contracting erratically around the veiny thickness getting stuck in her vice grip. Just as she came unglued, so did Terry; though he could’ve stayed in it for at least another hour he couldn’t dare spoil the moment of unloading into her, the only thing stopping her from getting pregnant being the integrity of the condom she’d long forgotten about.

Terrys voice strained into her ear as his hips jerked erratically into her own, the only thing he whimpered between mourns being London's name. The moment his grip to her throat softened, she took the initiative to free herself, flopping to the mattress and swatting him back by the pelvis to make him pull out before he got the itch for round two. She couldn’t help but to groan and shiver at the sensation, Terry on the other hand finding it funny while trailing kisses down her spine, his goatee scratching her supple skin.

With a final, plush kiss to the side of her neck, Terry fully removed himself from her and flopped to the mattress, the covers and sheets scattered and ruined as they both struggled to catch their breath.

Terry of course was the first to speak, voice deepened out of exhaustion, “We need to shower. Bad,” he smirked, “I’ll get you a shirt, c’mon fore’ you fall asleep.”

It took all of the manpower they collectively had between them to hobble to the bathroom and clean up - both parties shooting sneaky glances between flushed cheeks, pursed smiles and snickers as they rid themselves of the night's essence. London tipped back to the bed first but grimaced at the damp spot in the covers. Terry on the other hand, smirked sheepishly at the mess as it wasn’t his first rodeo and opted to knock the linen off in full - a thick blanket from an older comforter set in tow. He was quick with his set up, carefully eying her as she made herself comfortable in the striped duvet. The wild animal from before, gone, it was back to calm and sweet Terrance doting on every wince. He mumbled apologies as he made the bed dip with his weight, opting to lay his hand on her stomach as London wrapped her arms into his. They would delve into how world changing this dynamic would be for their friend groups in the morning - the only thing mattering now was rest amongst one another.

And as for her midterm? It happily was good as fucked just as she’d been.

[cdragons]

Fuck Everything, But Mostly Fuck You - Part 3

Previous Part

Summary: You have never, EVER, in a million years hated anyone the way you hated Felix fucking Catton. But goddamn, Oliver Quick was a fucking close runner-up.

Warnings- MDNI 18+, slight mention of blood, sexual harassment, Felix is delulu and kind of a pig, Reader just wants some fucking peace, Michael is Michael and the best, Oliver is Oliver (the worst)

Author's Note: Thank you so much to everyone who commented and reblogged! I didn't expect this story to gain so many readers, and this was a challenging chapter to write - but only because there were some scenes I couldn't add because it would have gotten too long otherwise.

If there was a God out there, you prayed for the coming term to be as wonderful as this holiday had been for you.

You really wanted to kick yourself in the pants for making such a fucking cheesy wish at night watching the stars with Michael.

Right now, you were leaning to rest your head against a bookshelf in a slant position. You had a splitting migraine that began from the moment you woke up and worsened with nausea from your tutorial. And you couldn’t even go back to your dorm for the rest of the day because your lab course for your gen-ed didn’t allow for absences.

“What’d she do now?” came a voice on your right.

You looked to the right and were blinded by a white and blue-striped button-down shirt with short sleeves tucked into a pair of tan khaki pants.

Your knight-in-silver-framed glasses, Michael Gavey, everyone.

All the guy was missing was a pocket protector with pens and tape wrapped around the bridge, and he would have matched every bullied kid in every high school movie set in the 80s.

You turned around to lean your back against the bookshelves and slowly lowered yourself until your butt was parallel to your feet. Blowing the stray hairs out of your face, you remembered to take deep breaths to prevent you from blowing up at your only friend.

“No,” you sighed, “well – yes, but nothing I can’t handle.”

Do you love your classes? Yes. Was Daria Martin still your art teacher, and did she still like you? Yes. Are the rest of your teachers mostly assholes that think all Americans are Appalachian hill-billies? Also, yes. But were you still not excelling and scoring in the top ten after every exam? Naturally, no doubt about it.

But were you as invisible and unnoticed as you were before the break came? No. Did anyone with a pulse give you side-eyed glances after your stunt with the 24/7 shit-faced He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named? Pretty much, yes. Did most of your problems come from one mythic bitch in a 5’3” flesh suit that had the ‘Juicy’ logo plastered on her ass? Namely, one in particular, Annabel – who was your assigned student partner in your tutorial.

Was your new name among the student body now “Psycho Bitch”? …Unfortunately, yes.

…Okay, so this term has not been going as well as you had hoped during the break.

Annabel hated you – like hated-HATED you. And you had no idea why.

You were pretty sure you were less than blank air to her last term, but now she was determined to make your life a living hell. Last term, she skipped every other session to do whatever Annabel did. But now, it felt like she came to every tutorial for the opportunity to tear apart your work.

You’re pretty confident she was the one who started your new “name” about a few weeks ago when the weather began to warm up.

It’s not as if you were a stranger to being picked and prodded by the people born with silver spoons on their tongues and blessed with golden-tipped wings. You were a public-school kid from grades K-12 who went to Townsend Harris for those last four years. Townsend Harris High School was a public school, but make no mistake – it was just as full of the same bullshit hierarchy that made up every private school in Manhattan.

"Open the doors to all. Let the children of the rich and the poor take their seats together and know of no distinction save that of industry, good conduct, and intellect."

What crock. You only survived those years because every kid knew that your dad was an NYU professor who knew the Dean of Admissions of Columbia. You couldn’t recall how often you wished you had joined your friends at Flushing High or even Bayside.

However, regardless of the snide snarks and bullshit snickers pointed at you, you were left alone for the most part.

Sure – it sucked; that goes without saying. It was naïve of you to assume that people would grow out of the need for drama once they walked through the ivory doors and marble floors of higher education. It was stupid of you to think that everyone would forget about your outburst at Bodleian while they were getting drunk on the New Year.

And while Annabel was one migraine-inducing problem, she wasn’t the worst part of returning. No, that title belonged to her boyfriend, a whole other can of monkeys.

The worst part – the worst part of EVERYTHING – was how Felix fucking Catton was incapable of just leaving you the hell alone. It was like he had a little antenna sticking out of his head specifically for you whenever the two of you were within a ten-foot radius of him. Everywhere you went, it was as if you had a giant blinking arrow above you screaming, “Felix Catton’s New Toy”!

No, you were less than a toy – you were a joke, a gimmick.

God, you should have just stuck to your original plan and applied to any SUNY school that would have accepted you without even looking at your application.

But no, your good-Samaritan-obsessed college counselor called your parents and complained that you weren’t “putting yourself out there” enough. And now you were over thirty-four hundred miles away from home, stuck with the worst people ever. It was like a thousand tiny prickles were running on your skin as your mind filled with static.

Whenever Felix called out to you, it was to invite you to a party or get wasted. One time, he walked up to you insanely plastered and invited you for a quickie in the men’s bathroom. You were in an empty lecture hall since your usual spot in the library was taken, and Michael was still in class, so you didn’t see the point in trying to find an open spot.

Somehow – without you noticing – the guy plopped himself next to you and asked if there were any rooms in the building where he could smoke a joint in.

“Pretty sure you could open the window in the bathroom to smoke in there,” you replied absentmindedly.

And then he put his hand ON YOUR THIGH, leaned to your ear to whisper, “Wanna get out of here to join me? We don’t have only to get high.”

You grabbed all your shit and booked it – out of the building and all the way to your dorm to take a shower that lasted for around twenty minutes. You wanted to get rid of the smell of nicotine and overpriced aftershave. The scent of him on your skin made you wish you could tear it off.

And in your panic, you left your bike at the building’s entrance.

When you returned to retrieve it, it was after dark, and you recruited Michael as your tall and bony human shield.

“Do not ever walk home alone at night,” your mom told you every morning you left for school.

You tried not to think about the haunted look in her eyes each time she told you.

“Wanna skip the dining hall tonight? We can walk to Crowley Street and order take-out at that Pakistani place you like so much.”

Oh, that perked you right up. Jannahs Express was a broke college student’s paradise. The food was cheap, and the owners took pity on the international students. It was slightly more expensive in the UK, but it was the closest you could find with food on par to Kababish on Broadway in Queens. You stifled a laugh remembering the sight of Michael drinking the entire pitcher of water after you dared him to try a dish at ‘regular.’

“Seriously? Do you think you could take more than ‘English-mild’?” you asked as you stood up. “How did you survive your mom’s cooking for so long? She made us Indian food on our last night.”

“Mum grew up in London, and she had neighbors teach her how to make it the traditional way. You’re the only person who could take that level. Lilypad and I got Dad’s taste buds.”

Choking on your spit from laughing at the image of Gregory Gavey’s face turning firetruck red, you felt the migraine slowly disappear.

“Yeah, I’ll bet. God, I can’t imagine the look on his face when –”

A familiar voice that left a bitter taste in your mouth after hearing interrupted your conversation.

“Hey, (Y/N). Can we talk?”

You and Michael turned your heads to find Oliver Quick – Michael’s former friend, your former acquaintance – and the sight of him soured the mood instantaneously. You narrowed your eyes to dangerous slits to show your displeasure seeing him as one corner of your lip curled to show a sneer. You never liked the guy. There was just something about how he acted and presented himself. He had a profound desperation to impress everyone around him.

So much so that he immediately dropped Michael after becoming Felix Catton’s new pet. As evidenced by the oversized gray zip-up hoodie blanketing him. Felix’s, no doubt.

Fuck, you hated him.

“Ugh, what do you want?” you snapped, taking a bit of pleasure in seeing how your voice made him flinch.

“Look, can we –” his eyes hastily darted to Michael, then you, then behind him to make sure no one was watching him “– can we talk in private?”

Seriously? That’s how he wants to play this?

In the corner of your eye, you saw how tightly Michael clenched his fists. He was obviously still hurt from the time his ex-friend treated him like shit.

Oh, this will not do.

“Oliver,” you snarled as you crossed your arms over your chest, “whatever the hell you have to say to me, you can say in front of Michael.”

“Can you please not do this now?” he begged with pathetic eyes. How very in-character of him.

“Tick tock, Quick. Are you going to talk, or do I have to throw a drink in your face again? But this time, I’ll smash the glass on your face, too.”

Seeing the look on his face gave you almost a perverse sense of joy. Maybe this is why bullies exist.

“Do you think you’ll be at the pub sometime this week?”

What the fuck? Was he serious? His question caught you completely off-guard. You expected him to ask for notes or even help with homework, as his grades have slipped since becoming an official Felix Catton fanboy.

“At the pub – Oliver, when have I drunk alcohol in the entire time we’ve known each other?”

“You’ll turn nineteen this year, right? It’s only illegal if you’re under 18,” he tried to put out convincingly.

“Yeah, no shit, Sherlock. But you’re forgetting the part where I’m still an American citizen. Just because it’s legal for me to vote doesn’t mean it’s okay for me to drink yet.”

“No one cares about that here!” he almost shouted. “Just come with me to the pub at King’s Arms for the next few nights.”

“No fucking way,” you scoffed. “My parents would kill me if they found out I drank on a school night. Also, in case you forgot, we still have our test tomorrow in History. And I, for one, don’t need to get sloshed every night to feel important.”

Michael tugged on your sleeve and nodded at the small crowd forming around you three. You sighed in silence, agreeing that it wasn’t worth it. You both tried to walk away, but you were grabbed and stumbled back, which caused you to drop your books.

“Ow! Are you kidding–” but a wince broke your complaint as Oliver’s hold on your arm tightened to a painful grip. Your eyes traveled to his face, and you were shocked to see the anger shining in his eyes.

“Why do you have to make everything so fucking difficult?” he grit out. “Are you trying to ruin my life?”

The way his nails dug into your skin made you curse under your breath. Seeing you in pain broke Michael out of his shock at how someone as meek as Oliver Quick could show so much aggression. He rushed to get him off you.

“Are you fucking mental?” he hissed at Oliver once he managed to separate to two of you.

But Oliver’s nail left red scratch marks down to your wrist, even breaking the skin enough to cause little beads of blood to escape. This enraged Michael like you have never seen. Staring at the evidence of his former friend’s clawing, he walked forward and pushed him to the bookshelf before grabbing his shirt with both hands.

“What’s wrong with you?” Michael yelled. “She already said no!”

You wiped the blood off your arm with an old travel tissue pack you stole from the plane you took from JFK to London last summer. God, everyone was staring at you guys now. You needed to find a way to contain the situation. If any staff catches you, all three of you may risk trouble. Trouble that would jeopardize your scholarships. You grabbed Michael’s hands to get him to loosen his grip.

“Look, I’ll hear you out–” you looked around and cringed at everyone’s stares, “–just not here.”

This calmed Oliver’s rage enough to get Michael to let go.

“Okay,” he whispered, “okay – yeah. Let’s go outside.”

The three of you grabbed your shit and quickly exited the library. You went to the same area behind the building with no windows – ergo, no bystanders to gawk at you.

“Okay, we’re outside. Look, I’m sorry about your arm. But can you please just –”

You lifted your hand to stop him.

“Okay, look. I only said I would hear you out to make you and Michael stop fighting,” you stated matter-of-factly. “None of us could afford to get in trouble with the faculty and staff, and it was getting too out-of-hand. Oliver, I am not going to King Arm’s tonight or any night you ask me. I have my own life, so don’t drag me into yours.”

Oliver gaped like a fish for a few seconds before speaking.

“But you have to! Please! If you do, then maybe he’ll –”

“WHO?” you interrupted, shouting. “Who will be there? Who is so important that you act so fucking psycho for five minutes ago?”

This was too much for you to deal with everything on your plate already.

“Cut the vague bullshit already! Why are you desperate for me to be there? It’s so –” You froze as an epiphany struck down you.

Oh, hell fucking no…

“Are you hoping that Felix will be there?” you asked through clenched teeth.

You felt like a volcano ready to blow with his slight nod. And like a volcano – you blew.

“You mean to tell me that you risked all our asses, attacked, and humiliated me for fucking FELIX CATTON?!”

You couldn’t believe it – you couldn’t fucking believe it. Felix Catton took up so much of your life already; once again, he felt it necessary to take more of it for himself.

How much more could one man take? How much more did he want until it was enough?

He had taken so much – more than any person other than yourself had any right to own. Your education, your peace, and what was next? Your body? Your life? Did he intend to bleed you dry of everything like a parasitic vampire he and his kind pretended not to be?

You were going crazy, insane, and running yourself tired all at once. The absurdity of it all made you laugh. You laughed and laughed and laughed until you were gasping for air. You laughed so hard that tears spilled from your eyes as you doubled over.

“Oh my god,” you gasped, “oh my god! That’s it. Of course, it is. What else could it be?”

Standing straight, you kept laughing, but you were staring at Oliver with an answer clear in your eyes.

“He got bored of you,” you accused him, “didn’t he? So quickly?”

God, how you relished how red his face turned. If you were smart, you would have stopped taunting there – but you were too tired of everything to care.

“It’s been what? A month? Maybe two?” you further pressed. “He really just loves to go through all his toys, huh?”

“(Y/N),” Michael whispered in your ear, “let’s just go.”

He looked at Oliver with disdainful eyes before softening them to look back at you.

“He isn’t worth it. Come on, let’s get your cut cleaned up before we leave.”

You let Michael gently drag you away from the hurricane mess that was Oliver Quick, leaving him to stew in anger and wallow in self-pity on the chilly spring night.

A few days later, you and Michael were walking back to his dorm after watching one of the most notable movie franchises starring one of Hollywood’s best actors.

“How could you not love Pirates of the Caribbean?” you cried. “Johnny Depp is beyond brilliant!”

“Oh, so acting drunk in front of an expensive camera is now considered brilliant?” he quipped back. “Shit, I should have just gone into acting instead.”

“I’m sorry, do you not remember his jar of dirt? That scene was completely improvised, by the way – including his fall.”

“Oh – not the stupid jar of dirt! Lil’ kept buggering me all summer doing that scene after I took her to see it!”

“Oh, I meant to ask. What did Lily think of the books I got for her birthday? Were they weird?”

“Are you kidding? She loved them. She keeps going on about how she wants to be Annabeth for Halloween. Oh, by the way, she’s making me dress up as Luke and wants you to go as Thalia.”

Your jaw dropped in shock. “Seriously?! Yes, let’s do it. I am so in.”

“She is aware that Luke’s the villain, right?”

“Don’t worry about it so much. She wants to share these memories with you. And you are such a good brother, Mikey.”

“I am never going to escape that name with you,” he groaned, “am I?”

“Nope!” you happily confirmed. “Never! When I write my speech at your wedding, I will mention it at least fifteen times.”

“I’ll allow six.”

“Twelve.”

“Ten, take it or leave it.”

“Ten it is. Pinky-swear.”

You held out your pinky to show sincerity. And like someone raised correctly, Michael respected the sanctity of the swear by reciprocating.

“Perfect! Now that that’s settled, is it okay if I crash at your place for the night? It’s so late, and we don’t have classes tomorrow morning.”

“Yeah, sure,” he replied. “Just make sure you – Annabel.”

Wait, what? You stopped walking and turned to look at your friend in confusion.

“Annabel?”

He pointed it out in front of him with a slight nod.

“Annabel,” he confirmed.

Indeed, it was Annabel. But she was sitting slumped against the hallway’s walls with vomit all over her blue dress.

Felix had been going mad for the past few months since his and Farleigh’s return to Oxford. It was already almost May, and he hadn’t come any closer to getting (Y/N)’s attention.

What could he possibly be doing that was so wrong?

He invites you to parties or a drink with you every time he sees you. He had hoped that being friends with Ollie would have given him an “in” with you, but there was no such luck. Did you really have no idea how he felt about you? How much more obvious could he be?

He remembered how happy he was when he realized that Oliver knew you. It was that night at the pub at Kings’ Arms. He recalled it so vividly.

Felix was silent throughout the entire transaction. The sight of you coming over entirely transfixed him. Your hair had two small braids on the side that were attached with small yellow butterfly clips. You were wearing black denim overalls with vintage-looking patches sewn onto the fabric. Your shirt was a light blue-dyed shirt-sleeved t-shirt with splotches of navy blue. It must have been something you made when you were little. The fabric looked soft and worn down. But the size was small enough to hug the curves of your upper torso perfectly. The way the fabric stretched across your tits made him salivate.

After he introduced himself to you, you only responded with a grimace and a slight nod of acknowledgment. He invited you to join him and his friends for a drink, but you only ignored him. His words were meaningless breezes to you – white noise in the background that added to the clang and chatter in the room. He wasn’t even paying attention to Oliver until you threw that drink at him.

“Fucking cunt-rag!” you called Ollie after throwing Farleigh’s drink in his face. You shoved a middle finger for added effect. “Don’t ever show your face in front of me again.”

Grabbing your coat, you stomped away from the table.

Absentmindedly handing his friend some tissues, Felix had to know what your deal was with Oliver. Were you two dating or just friends? He didn’t know how he felt about his new friend being romantically involved with his angel.

“Wait, do you two know each other?” he asked.

“What?” asked Oliver – not understanding his idol’s question before his mind finally registered it. “Oh, yeah. Yeah, she’s a friend of a friend.”

“Were you two ever, like ‘together’?” Felix had to know.

Oliver’s eyes widened a bit before shaking his head and panickedly answering.

“No, no, no. We have a few classes together – that’s it.”

Felix couldn’t believe his luck. Ollie must really be his hero.

“Do you think you could introduce us?” he asked excitedly – his molten chocolate eyes were shining ablaze with hope.

“Uh, yeah, sure.” Oliver quickly agreed – anything to keep his attention on him.

Felix felt like leaping to the sky. He could run a marathon with how much energy was flooding throughout him. He clapped his hands before grabbing Ollie’s face with both hands and smacking a wet kiss on both cheeks.

“Oh, thank you! Thank you!” Felix went up to get him another pint. “You’re my hero, Ollie. You really are.”

As he lay on his bed, he tried to remember every interaction with you. His last one with you was something he could admit went horribly wrong.

He wandered on the grounds when he stumbled on a building with your bike on the rack. Figuring that you were just in a lecture, Felix figured he could try to catch up with you when it was done. It wasn’t like he had anything important later. He would stay near the entrance and try to catch your attention when you walked out.

Simple.

And because he was God’s favorite, he found you sitting in the middle of an empty classroom. You were taking notes while reading a massive textbook while lightly bobbing your head to whatever was blasting through your earbuds.

Sliding to the seat next to you, he smoothly asked you if there was any room where he could smoke. You didn’t even bother to look at him while answering him – too fixated with your studies to pay attention to him.

Knowing that he had to get you to look at him through more direct actions, Felix impulsively put his hand on your thigh before asking you if you wanted to join him. He even joked, saying that you didn’t only have to get high.

But seeing the terror in your eyes threw him off. He quickly wanted to tell you that he was only joking. If you knew that he wasn’t being serious, maybe you would ease up around him. But before he could apologize, you frantically stood from your seat to gather your books in your bag before running out of the room.

Felix groaned into his hands as he recalled how fast you ran out of the room and away from him.

“Felix, you’re a fucking idiot,” he softly insulted himself.

God, what the hell was wrong with him? Why did he think that someone as studious as you would ever consider getting high with some bloke in the bathroom of an academic building?

Every step he tried to take forward with you felt like he was going ten steps back. He needed to find a way to get on your good side.

Maybe Ollie could – no, that was a dead end. Fuck, he needed a drink.

Lying on his bed, Oliver stared at the ceiling of his room. Annabel had just left with the bottle of vodka they had been drinking out of for the past half hour. He wanted to cry.

Why was everything going wrong?

But he knew the reason. It was you.

He was so naïve to think you wouldn’t be an obstacle. You had practically ruined everything from the beginning. It wasn’t just when you refused to help him the other day but also that night at the pub at Kings’ Arms.

While Felix was ordering him a drink, Oliver sat bewildered at the sequence of events that had transpired in the past five minutes. First, Felix invited him over to sit with him and his friends. And when things had been so well, you interrupted his excellent time by asking where Michael was. When you realize he has left your friend alone, you ask for Farleigh Start’s drink before throwing it in his face. You then called him a “cunt-rag” before storming off like a goddamn child.

Luckily, Felix hadn’t listened to you speak. But that was only because he stared at you – stared at you like he was born to worship you. Even worse, Felix asked him if he could introduce the two of you at some point. The way Felix’s eyes widened in glee when Oliver agreed enraged him – even more than when you insulted and almost humiliated him in front of Felix.

Staring at his back, Oliver figured Felix’s attention on you wasn’t something to worry about. He was only interested in you because you were pretty. As much as you infuriated him, Oliver admitted that you had a rare and genuine beauty to you. He didn’t know whether it was your indifference for Oxford’s gods and kings or your dedication to keeping in touch with your American roots – but it was enough to enrapture Felix Catton temporarily.

No, Oliver Quick had no reason to worry. He would be enough for Felix. And then you would be an afterthought, and he’d be Felix Catton’s everything.

Oliver had to find a way to ensure you wouldn't be a problem anymore. You'd comply - there would come a time when you won't have a choice.

Let me know if you want me to write the full scene of Reader throwing the drink at Oliver!

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[witchwyfe]

here with me - tik

pairing - college! Tom ‘Iceman’ Kazansky x female reader

précis - mav makes a bet during the soccer's teams getaway.

content/warnings - language, annoyance towards maverick, fluff

word count - 933

a/n - college soccer player ice series

“Okay, you know this is actually really stupid.” You complain, curled up in the backseat of Carole’s car. “Everyone else wants to sleep together, why can’t we?”

“You know how the guys are,” Ice huffs from the other end of the phone. “They’re turning it into a competition.”

“Yeah, and who’s idea was it?” You scoff. “Maverick’s. He’s single and an asshole, he doesn’t have any stake in the game, of course he would propose something like this.”

Something like this being, for your autumn break trip to a cabin, sleeping arrangements are all girls together, and all boys together. Despite the fact, that the trip is made up of some of the soccer team, and their girlfriends. Mav even thought it would be funny to have whoever caves first, buy everyone dinner on the last night.

You sigh loudly, ignoring Carole’s chuckle from the driver’s seat. Her and Goose finally got their shit together, and they’ve been happily dating since summer. 

“And of course you won’t crack, because you love to win.” You whine pitifully, more to yourself than your boyfriend. “I’ll see you when we get there.”

You hang up and shove your phone into your purse, leaning your head against the window, watching a flurry of orange as you pass a multitude of trees.

Not much more time passes before you’re pulling up at the cabin, clearly the last ones there, if the amount of cars shoved into the dirt driveway, is anything to go by.

Ice, Goose, and Slider are quick to come out and help with the bags in the back of Carole’s trunk.

“Hiya honey,” Goose greets, before dipping Carole in a dramatic kiss. You turn to see Ice, and pout, before falling into his arms.

“Hey baby,” He murmurs, pressing a kiss at your hairline. 

“Icey,” You whine. “Missed you.”

“Pretty girl.” He coos. “I missed you too.”

Following a week of mid-terms, you’d barely gotten to see your boyfriend. Both of you had stacked schedules with exams and papers, and Ice had a big game right before break began. You were looking forward to a long weekend with him, snuggled into his arms while you sleep, the way you hadn’t been able to. 

His arms squeeze easily around your waist, and he lifts you a bit until you can’t help but smile. You fist your hands in the material of his sweatshirt. 

“Was lookin’ forward to sleeping with you this weekend.” You tell him quietly. “I didn’t sleep well last week.”

“I know, me too.” He says, lips at your temple. “I’m sorry angel.”

“Not your fault your friends are stupid.”

He chuckles, squeezing you one more time before setting you down. He grabs your duffel bag and purse, waiting for you to shut your car door, before heading inside.

“Carole and I are sharing a room, I think,” You frown. “That’s what Marcy said in the group chat.” Marcy, Slider’s girlfriend, was also very upset about the sleeping arrangements, had coordinated which room everyone is staying in. Your boyfriend nods and continues in, before stopping at a room and gently setting your bags down.

You notice two beds, neither much bigger than a twin, but still an upgrade from the college dorm bed Ice had snuck in, to share with you countless times the previous year. 

“Look baby,” You whine. “We could totally fit in here, you always cuddle up anyway.”

“I know, sweet girl,” He soothes with a kiss to your temple. 

Carole comes in a second later, Goose rolling her suitcase while she spouts similar complaints that you had.

“Just because Mav isn’t getting any, doesn’t mean he has to ruin it for the rest of us.” She huffs, crossing her arms against her chest. Goose barely bites back his snort, throwing his head back in laughter before Carole sticks a withering glare on him. 

You nod in agreement, turning towards her. “That’s what I was just telling him, I mean why did anyone invite him anyway? He’s fucking annoying.”

“Okay,” Ice warns softly. “Not that I don’t currently share the sentiment, but Mav’s room is right down the hall and I’m sure he can hear us.”

You roll your eyes but oblige, leaning into him. “Are we allowed to sit together on the couch at least?”

You packed everything you need for your night time routine and to sleep. Your face is washed, teeth are brushed, and now you’re scrolling on your phone, trying to chill before bed. Carole had long snuck out of your room and into Goose’s—you wish your boyfriend didn’t take everything so seriously. Goose laughed in Mav’s face when he proposed the competition—so it’s too quiet and you don’t have anyone to talk to. Right in the middle of your scroll through Tik Tok, your phone buzzes with a text.

I miss u

You smile, imagining your boyfriend curled up in his bed, missing you enough to send you text. 

Come in

You respond.

Carole left. We can push the beds together :) 

He sends back:

We don’t need that much room.

Less than a minute later, your door is being pushed open and your boyfriend, clad in boxers and an old crewneck is suddenly sliding in behind you, arms circling your waist. 

“Missed you.” He mumbles into your neck, the tip of his nose cold against the skin. 

“You’re not allowed to agree to any of Mav’s dumb bets, ever again.” You grumble. “Last time you had to bleach your hair and now this.”

“I know baby,” He coos. “No more, I promise.”

© witchwyfe 2024. absolutely no reposting, translating, or modifying, even with credit.

[kyoshithewriter]

Level the Playing Field.

Warnings: mature themes (18+)

Part ten: Screwed.

A/n: Enjoy?

Mikayla and her family are her guardian angels; Sadé is convinced of that after today. Not only did the couple wholeheartedly agree to let her stay with them, they are already on a mission to help her find a job for the summer. Mr. and Mrs. Ahn had joked that she’s now their adopted daughter and she shouldn’t ever be afraid to ask them for help. Of course, she teared up a bit, but it’s so overwhelming experiencing such kindness from strangers when she couldn’t even get it from her own mother.

“Ryan is leaving for Spain immediately after exams and I’m already dreading it.” Sadé can’t see Mikayla’s face from her position with her head in her lap but she can tell her friend is pouting.

“Leaving for Spain? Why?” she asks absentmindedly, eyes glued to a yelling Gordon Ramsay on tv.

“To train with the first team until the international break since exams finish early in May. The manager wants to start getting them acquainted with teammates, facilities and what not Ryan said.” Mikayla scratches at a particular spot on her scalp that’s so good that she almost misses what she said. Almost.

“Oh, so are they all going?” She tries to sound nonchalant but she’s sure Mikayla knows what she really wants to know. Is Jude leaving as well?

“Yup, um, Jude is apparently going sooner as well since he’s currently suspended.” Mikayla responds cautiously. That’s okay. That’s fine. It’s not as if they’re even on good terms with each other at the moment. Especially since she made Annita mad enough to embarrass him last night. But in the back of her mind, she was expecting for them to just… find their way back to each other like they always do. He’d annoy her to see him until she relented and then they would… spend the summer break together? Sadé knows she’s delusional but she can’t deny that she feels crestfallen now that she knows her delusional daydreaming would stay just that.

“Oh. Good for them.” Sadé swallows thickly.

“Have you um, have you heard from him since that incident last night?”

Sadé shrugs her shoulders in lieu of responding.

“Why is this idiot trying to make an eclair in 30 minutes? Like I understand these shows are scripted but can they at least not make them do stupid shit like this?” Sadé comments angrily. Almost as if she needs something to take her frustration out on.

“You know, me and Ryan are going on a road trip to some hiking trail tomorrow. Jude asked to tag along, he seems to be… not himself. You could come too, breathe some fresh air… stretch your legs.”

Sadé cranes her head up to look at Mikayla who’s obviously avoiding her eyes.

“And um, are you sure he’s the only one tagging along?” skepticism clear in her voice as she eyes her friend’s chin suspiciously. Mikayla whips her head down to stare at her as if she’s lost her mind.

“Do you think I’d be going anywhere with Annita, Sadé?”

“Oh, well, I could use some fresh air. I don’t know.” She tries to play it cool.

“Well, if you decide to, we’re leaving by 7 am since the trail is a three hour ride away.”

“Okay.” Comfortable silence settles between them and surprise, surprise, the idiot who tried to make eclairs was eliminated.

“By the way, you and Ryan, is it serious?” Sadé asks warily.

“We haven’t really discussed that yet but I should hope so. He’s being so sweet with me and with a tongue like that he’s not going anywhere.”

Sadé immediately bolts upright, turning her scandalous expression in her friend’s blushing direction.

“Mikky?! How come you haven’t told me?”

“I wanted to but there was just a lot going on.”

And yea, she’s right.

“Well we have time now so start talking!”

******************

Sadé is ready 10 minutes earlier than she needs to be. She can’t stop the rhythmic bouncing of her right leg while she’s seated on her bed. She scrolls through the websites Jude had sent her, wanting to keep herself busy but also wanting to commit the dates the applications open to memory. She’s obsessed with being among the first applicants hoping this will put her in a better position to be chosen. She needs it. Badly. A notification from Mikayla pops up on her screen.

Mikayla [6:56 am]: You’re coming right?

Sadé [6:56 am]: Yes, I’m ready.

Mikayla [6:57 am]: good. I hope you’re dressed warmly enough. It’s apparently a lot cooler up there. I’m waiting in the kitchen.

Sadé looks down at her long, black tights, running shoes and her long sleeved fitted jacket. She did dress warmly, feeling the chill in the early morning air after it rained last night so she’s good to go. She heads for the kitchen to retrieve her water bottle while Mikky gathers snacks from the cabinet and her thermos filled with tea.

“Ryan says he’s downstairs.” Mikky says, hastily gathering everything to shove into her tote bag. Sadé gathers her small backpack off the counter following her friend out the door.

Sadé’s spine is ramrod straight in the back of Ryan’s Toyota Tacoma truck. Jude is seated to her left, barely any space between them because of how wide he spreads his legs. If she didn’t know him before, she would’ve thought it was on purpose just to piss her off. But that’s just how he always sits; like he’d be uncomfortable otherwise. She doesn’t want to think about why right now. They’ve been on the road for almost two hours now and the only word they’ve said to each other was the quiet greeting they mumbled when she first climbed in the truck. Ryan’s grin was wide, she’s sure Mikayla had informed him Sadé was coming but judging by the glare Jude sent him in the overhead mirror, he wasn’t in the loop. Despite the tension in the backseat, Mikayla and Ryan chatter away, uncaring of the other two people in the car. They might as well have not even been there the way the couple up front openly flirt and share laughs between them. Sadé turns to look outside the window, enjoying the wind against her face. The air already feels much crisper as the landscape gradually changes from an overabundance of buildings to trees and open fields. Sadé is almost falling asleep against the half cracked window when they finally make a turn onto a bumpy trail in the forest leading up to a wooden gate. Some woman greets them enthusiastically and hands them passes as well as a map that contains warnings and emergency numbers.

“Okay so it says no going farther than 15 miles in any direction, we’re likely to get lost or encounter wild animals then. There’s a creek five miles north! We should go. There are designated rest spots with benches just in case we need a break. Oh! And edible berries can be found too, they’re labeled and we’re allowed to snack on them.” Mikayla reads excitedly. Sadé’s sure she’s on the verge of squealing.

“You’re so cute.” Ryan follows up the statement with a gentle kiss to her forehead and Mikayla turns fifty shades of pink. Cute. Sadé smiles mischievously as soon they make eye contact.

“Let’s go see the creek first.” Sadé suggests. She wants to sit by it for a while. She really misses the sound of moving water and the calm it brings. The others, except Jude hum in agreement.

They’re five minutes into the walk and Sadé is in love with this place. She has always been a huge lover of nature, but the way they label the trees and give little facts about each is truly fascinating. She has stopped at every single one, squinting at the labels of each. They’ve already even gotten to gather and snack on some blackberries. She tries her best to ignore Jude’s presence lurking just behind. He’s been staring at her nonstop since they began their trek, always making sure to stay behind her. Ryan and Mikky are ahead but they’re still in sight, plus, there are arrows on every fifth tree that directs you along the path so she isn’t too worried about that.

“The least you can do is apologize, you know.” She almost ignores it, thinking she’s overhearing Ryan and Mikky’s conversation somehow. Maybe a few minutes of unpolluted air has unlocked some hidden superpowers she has. But when her brain catches up…

“Excuse me?” Her voice is tinged with annoyance but her pitch is low. She doesn’t want to yell and break the serenity. She turns to face his glare head on. “Why would I apologize to you?”

“Do you know how embarrassing that was yesterday?”

“And I should care about that because…?”

Jude surprises her by tilting his mouth in a small smile.

“You shouldn’t. I was just testing to see if that version of you I saw yesterday is still there. Glad to see it is.”

Sadé blows out a heavy breath.

“You asshole.” But she returns his smile.

“Look at you, standing up for yourself.”

“Well, I told off my mother a couple hours prior so I was feeling very brave.” She admits shyly.

“Really? What happened?” He asks as they fall in step with each other, continuing along the trail.

“Well, Summers had one more trick up her sleeve. Used her access to my file to contact my mom about me sleeping with male professors for grades and about our… the time we saw that movie weeks ago. I don’t know how she saw us kissing in that alley but she did.” Sadé scuffs her shoe against some pebbles on their path. “So yea mom called, threatened about what would happen when I go back home for the summer and that I should apply for local universities so I told her off. She cut me off but wow, it’s so freeing.” She looks up at him to see the furrow between his brows.

“I can’t help but feel this is somewhat partly my fault as well. How different your life would be right now if you didn’t see what you saw.” He says bitterly.

“Well, it would be just like it was before. A prison. Don’t feel bad about that woman being unhinged, in fact, I want to thank you. You’re the one who actually gave me the courage to think about actually living for me.” She gently bumps into his side and her stomach warms when she’s rewarded with a smile.

“I guess you’re right. What are you going to do though? About the summer and have you looked into the scholarships yet?” He asks, concerned.

“I’ll be staying with Mikky for the summer and yea I’ve checked them out. I’ll apply when they’re open.”

“Good. If you need anything at all please let me know. I’d love to help. I’ve been wanting to talk to you, I owe you big time for what you did but I wasn’t sure if you’d wanted to see me after everything cooled off.” He sounds almost… shy. Sadé twists her mouth to hide her smile.

“Well, I told myself I needed a break from you but I won’t say I wasn’t sad that you weren’t at least nagging me a bit.”

“Did you miss me, Sadé?” He’s smirking and Sadé rolls her eyes.

“Shut up, Jude.”

“Did you?”

Sadé picks up her pace to avoid answering his question. Because yes she did, but she doesn’t want him to know that. It takes him all of two strides to get caught up with her. Sadé’s body locks tight with tension at the feel of his hands around her waist before she’s picked cleanly off the ground.

“Jude!!” It’s a cross between a scream and a laugh.

“Tell me you missed me.” He playfully demands. At the first shake of her head, he starts spinning.

“Admit you missed me.” He tries again. Sadé’s a giggling mess but she’s starting to get dizzy.

“Fuck’s sake! Fine I missed you, Jude. Now stop!” Jude ceases his spinning as soon as she concedes. “Are you happy now?!”

“Ecstatic because I missed you too.” There’s an almost tender look in his eyes as he stares down at her still smiling face. Sadé ducks her head bashfully, gripping at his shirt for balance as she lowered to her feet.

“You’re going to hurt yourself if you keep picking me up, you know?”

“Tsk, I doubt that.”

They continue their walk side by side in comfortable silence.

“Jude, do you consider me a friend?” She’s suddenly interested in the trees again, not daring to look in his direction. Did I ruin the mood? Doesn’t matter, if he can’t answer this simple question it really just means one thing.

“No.” Her heart drops but he continues before she has a chance to respond.

“I don’t want to fuck my friends, Sadé.”

Her skin tightens at his crude choice of words. But a big part of her is still disappointed. She’s not enough to be his friend but he’s okay with sex.

“You have that look on your face that’s telling me you’re misinterpreting what I meant.” There’s an air of frustration around him now. His face twisted in a frown.

“Then tell me, Jude. Tell me what you mean.” She coaxes softly.

“I need you to believe me when I say that you… you’re making me feel things I shouldn’t be feeling.” He chuckles bitterly, “Like I actually miss you when you’re not around and I think about you more than I fucking should. I notice every detail, I think about how the world is just so cruel and I want to protect you from it all but I can’t. I can’t give you what you need and you don’t deserve to be anybody’s second choice but I’m so selfish and…” he trails off to suck in a harsh breath, “So no, Sadé. I don’t consider you as a friend.” He marches off leaving a stunned Sadé in the middle of the trail.

******************

Celine is waiting by their door when they get back on campus. Sadé can’t even react to that as her mind is still reeling from Jude’s speech earlier. The tension between them had returned but for a whole different reason. The car ride back was so suffocating that even Ryan and Mikayla had seemed to have caught on. Jude refused to look in her direction the entire time but she couldn’t stop. She couldn’t stop taking his clenched jaw, his broad shoulders, his everything. Sadé was secretly going feral, of course he was attractive before but for some strange reason it seemed to have intensified after his confession. She needs him.

“Hey, where have you guys been?” Celine tries to sound conversational but the jealousy is easy to detect.

“Oh, um Ryan and I planned a hiking trip and I invited Sadé last minute because of… you know, everything going on.” Mikayla opens the door as she responds. Her tone cool and even. Well it’s not technically a lie…

“And I couldn’t have gotten an invite?”

Fuck. Celine looks like a kicked puppy and Sadé feels horrible.

“I’ll understand if you guys don’t want to be friends anymore but just please let me know now.” Celine says timidly. She avoids both their eyes with her watery ones.

“If you can admit that your obsession with Sean is a bit too much and you’ll take several steps back and swear on everything you’ll never try setting me up like that again then I’ll forgive it.” Sadé means it. She has been thinking about it and yes, what Celine did was foul but the outcome wasn’t anything too serious. As for her… thing with Sean that’s something she has to sort through on her own. She just knows now that she’ll never go anywhere Celine wants to lead her to.

“You’re right, I’ve been doing some thinking and I don’t like what it’s doing to me. So yes, I promise to start making efforts to get over him and I do swear I’ll never do anything like that to you again, Sadé. I’m so sorry.” Celine hangs her head in shame.

“Obviously the trust is fragile now, might be for a while and I’m not going anywhere you suggest we go but over time, maybe that will change.”

Celine’s shoulders sag, relieved.

“Thank you.” It’s barely above a whisper as she envelopes Sadé in a hug that she returns.

Mikayla giggles in pure glee.

“Finally! But don’t ever screw us again, Celine.”

Celine giggles through tears but moves to hug Mikayla.

“Alright enough of that, I’m going to my room. I need a warm shower and my bed.” Sadé groans as she rubs at a tender spot on her thigh. Hiking is not for the weak.

************

Sadé is fresh out the shower and only has one thing on her mind. Again. She bites at her thumb nail with her laptop idly playing New Moon in the background. Fuck it.

Sadé [8:02 pm]: You know, there are like five movies in the Twilight Saga?

She wants to throw her phone immediately as she hits send. Her leg bounces as she waits for the ping. It comes in within a minute.

Jude [8:03 pm]: Yea.

Sadé [8:04 pm]: We only watched one the other day.

She leaves it to him to piece the information together. Please get what I’m implying.

Sadé stares at the screen, waiting. It takes five minutes but it might as well have been an eternity.

Jude [8:10 pm]: Come unlock your door

Sadé leaps from her bed to pace in her room. She has a strong feeling that letting him in will only lead to one thing. She takes a deep breath and goes to let him in.

**************

Jude watches Sadé in his peripheral vision. Her posture is ramrod- straight and he can see the rapid rising and falling of her chest beneath her white shirt. She isn’t wearing a bra and her nipples are very hard and very visible. He clenches and unclenches his fist, trying to figure out what the fuck is going on the screen as he’s been distracted ever since stepping in her room. The room smells just like her, always a lingering, light scent of vanilla with something else layering it, something he can only describe as uniquely Sadé.

“Jude?” It’s so breathy it sounds close to a moan. He swallows thickly.

“Yes, Sadé?”

“I… I feel… I want…”

Jude watches her rub her thighs together, breathing harshly.

“Come here.” She’s crawling onto his lap eagerly as soon as he whispers the words. Her lips are plush, warm and eager and he wouldn’t have it any other way. His hands glide along the skin of her thighs, smooth, clearly moisturized and so soft. He teases her lips with his tongue and she opens for him. Her mouth is warm, pliant and tastes like the strawberries she was nibbling on. One stroke of his tongue at the roof of her mouth is all it takes to make her whimper, hips rolling on top of him. He would laugh at how eager she is if he didn’t immediately start getting hard as soon as she was on top of him. Her scent, her skin, her eyes, her lips- all too much. Breaking away from the kiss, he lifts the hem of her shirt up and over her head. Jude halts his movements briefly- she had nothing on underneath. She looks away from his shocked expression.

“Sadé.” It comes out as a groan.

“I told you, I found the right person.” She tries to shrug it off but he sees the goosebumps dotting her skin and the slight tremor in her limbs.

“You’re so beautiful, baby.” The pet name slips out but it feels so right. He quickly discards his own shirt, pulling her back in for a kiss. He teases her mouth until she’s almost sobbing, hips undulating sloppily. He can feel her wetting the front of his shorts but he doesn’t care, he relishes it in fact. Just knowing he could get her off with his tongue in her mouth is making him so dizzy he’s starting to see stars. Jude raises her off his lap by her hips.

“No! Please I was about to-”

“Need to taste you.” He responds gruffly while sliding down on her bed, positioning her directly above his mouth.

“What- oh!”

Her back bows at the first flick of his tongue. Wet. Just wet. She’s so warm he’s sure she could scorch his tongue, even then, he wouldn’t stop. Her hands grip at his hair tightly and she matches the movement of his tongue with her hips perfectly.

“Jude, so good. So so good.”

He groans loudly against her, hips raising to hump at nothing. He’s so turned on. He keeps his mouth on her clit while he gently eases two fingers inside. She tenses briefly but relaxes almost immediately. It only takes a few seconds for her to start dripping down his hands.

“Why are you so wet, Sadé what the fuck?” It’s almost torturous. She has drenched his mouth, his chin. He’s going to be smelling her on him for hours.

“You, Jude all you.” She sobs out in response. Jude squeezes his eyes shut feeling so overwhelmed by that little statement. She has to know what she’s doing to him. Her moans pitch higher, hips working faster- sloppy again. He immediately pulls his mouth away and stills the movement of his fingers.

“No no no not again.” Sadé cries out trying to lower herself back on his mouth but she’s not out-muscling him.

“I’ll make you feel so good I promise.” He reassures her, sliding her down his body. Her face is wet with tears, lips swollen. She looks absolutely wrecked already. He rolls her beneath him then reaches for the lubricated condom in the pocket of his shorts before hastily kicking them along with his boxers.

Sadé watches with fascination and a hint of fear in her eyes as he rolls the condom on, sucking in a sharp breath as he finally gets some contact. He knows he isn’t small by any means but he would never hurt her. He kneels between her opened legs, raining kisses along her thighs then her lower belly that flutters beneath his lips, then to her chest, tongue flicking to tease her nipples.

“Jude please” he can see the tears welling up in her eyes.

“Okay baby. It may hurt a bit, but if you want me to stop, say it and I will immediately.”

She nods timidly.

Jude is so desperate for it he’s almost shaking. He can’t believe he’s going to finally be inside her. He steadies his hand between them, teasing the blunt tip against her once, twice before he tries to slowly ease in. Sadé’s brows pinch tightly together and she squeezes her eyes shut. She whimpers loudly at the slight pinching she feels as her body tries to adjust to him inside her. Inside, holy shit. She’s doing it. She reaches a hand out to gently push against his lower belly. Too much, too full, too deep and he’s just half way in.

“Too much?” His body is locked tight with tension.

“Uh huh. Kinda hurts, so full.” She whines softly.

“Want me to stop?”

Sadé immediately shakes her head.

“No just, go slow.”

Jude knows he’s fucked. He pulls back slowly then slowly kicks his hips forward again. He tries not to go deeper yet, wanting her to adjust some more first. A few more kicks of hips and the glide is smoother. Sadé starts to relax, the hand on his belly no longer resisting.

“Oh…” her voice is breathy with surprise. She opens her legs wider. She turns her eyes up at him and the expression on her face makes him groan out loud.

“Sadé, fuck. Don’t look at me like that.”

“Can’t help it. More.”

Jude leans down to capture her lips before he slides deeper. She jerks but moans wantonly in his mouth, locking his hips in with her legs behind his back. And oh fuck. Her body swallows him in greedly. She was already so wet and the added lube from the condom makes it so good. He rolls his hips, hard and slow.

“Jude…”

Sadé can feel the orgasm that she was denied of bubbling under the surface of her skin. It makes her nipples tighten and her toes curl. She’s so full and where it was uncomfortable before, it’s just overwhelming in a way that’s so good now.

“Don’t stop, just like this, please don’t stop.”

The sound that comes from his mouth can only be described as animalistic. He eases away from her, hips still keeping the same rhythm but he does two other things that makes Sadé panic because it heightens the sensation so much. The first thing? He brings his left thumb to tease at her swollen clit. He doesn’t rub it harshly, he barely thrums at it- just teasing. She raises her hips to chase the sensation, and that’s when he does the other thing. He places his right hand flat against her lower abdomen and presses down. Sadé doesn’t know why it feels so overwhelmingly good but it does. It’s like all her energy is focused between her legs and nowhere else. And all the while, he doesn’t lose the rhythm of his hips. Not once.

“Jude! Fuck!”

He keeps going, brows furrowed in determination. Like his sole purpose on earth is to give her the best orgasm possible. Sadé’s body locks tight. The tension building, building. It’s so delicious it’s scary. This is it, this is how she goes. She’s going to explode into a million pieces of satisfied Sadé all over her dorm room. Literally fucked to death.

The orgasm tears through her so violently she screams to the high heavens. She doesn’t care. She can’t care about anything else except the fact that she is coming and coming and coming. She knows she’s thrashing but she can’t help it. It seems to be never ending. Maybe because he denied her twice before? Maybe because he’s just so good? Maybe just because it’s Jude. Whatever the reason it seems to go on forever. When she slowly gains her hearing back, Jude’s deep guttural moan is the first thing she registers. She cries weakly in response, feeling his hips stutter.

“Fucking, fuck, Sadé.” He moans softly once more before collapsing against her. She hugs him close, teeth chattering from how wrecked she feels.

They stay like that for a while. Skin to skin, just catching their breaths. Jude shifts to move away and Sadé whines, hugging him tighter.

“I’ve got to get rid of the condom baby.” He whispers reassuringly. He presses a chaste kiss to her lips before sitting up and slowly pulling out. She groans quietly at the feel of him slipping out.

“Come, let’s shower and get fresh sheets on the bed.” He coaxes softly. Sadé takes his offered hand following him to the bathroom. And reality sinks in.

She had already liked him so much before but after that life changing experience? Sadé is sure he’s now got her wrapped around his little finger. She’s so screwed, screwed with a capital S.

[suugarbabe]

I’m OBSESSED WITH UR FICS OMG- can u do a Mattheo or Theodore FIC x Reader based off of karma?! LOVERRRRR

Hii anon!

Sorry it's been a minute since you asked this :( I'm not super good at lyric fics but I did try my best so if it's shite dont come for me 😬

pairing: Theo Nott x reader

warnings: angst angst angst, no happy ending

You're talking shit for the hell of it

Addicted to betrayal, but you're relevant

You're terrified to look down

'Cause if you dare, you'll see the glare

Of everyone you burned just to get there

It's coming back around

You did your best to walk through the halls with your head high, but you could still hear the whispers of others around you as you passed. In the beginning it absolutely crushed you to know that Theo was saying awful things about you. You never thought the man that kissed you so softly, or wiped away tears from your cheek would be the one to inflict so much pain that the tears were because of him. 

The thing was, you were really happy with Theo in the thick of it, you didn’t understand where things were starting to go wrong when they did. About two months ago, when you were still together, Theo started being…distant. He all of a sudden wanted to study alone, was doing extra time on the quidditch pitch and going to bed early. 

You felt like you couldn’t be too mad at him for these things, end of term exams were coming up before winter holiday, and Theo was really serious about his studies. And to be honest, a lot of your study sessions ended up well…studying human anatomy (which was not a real subject at Hogwarts). 

And Slytherins quidditch team had gotten a new chaser recently, so Theo wanting to spend some extra time doing that didn’t seem off, he was essentially the lead chaser, and with good reason. You figured the combination of extra studying and extra quidditch was why he was so exhausting and going to bed early. 

You were definitely sad he was being distant, but were doing your best to play it off. Apparently you weren’t doing that good of a job as one night Theo had gotten particularly snappy with you. 

“What’s wrong with you?” he asked it without even looking up from his textbook. It was a rare occasion that he was actually studying with you in the common room. You shook your head, “Nothing’s wrong Theo, I’m glad we’re doing this together.” 

He left a puff of air through his nose, “W’dya mean, we always study together.” 

“I-I just meant you’ve been studying alone a lot lately, I’ve just…missed this with you,” you didn’t know why your voice was a little shaky. He wasn’t normally like this with you.

“You know you don’t have to be by my side all the time? I can have space to myself too,” Theo started packing away his things.

“I-I know, Theo, I wasn’t - I didn’t mean…” you trailed off, not sure what to say. 

“You know what, I'm just going to go to bed, guess I’ll see you tomorrow.” You watched him walk away from you, up the stairs, down the dorm halls. You don’t think he even noticed that he showed you zero affection before he left. Didn’t tell you he loves you like he always did, didn’t even kiss you. 

Spider-boy, king of thieves

Weave your little webs of opacity

My pennies made your crown

Trick me once, trick me twice

Don't you know that cash ain't the only price?

It's coming back around

You were starting to get used to Theo not really being there. It seemed like the only time he ever gave you attention was at meal times, and you figured that was only because his friends were your friends and vice versa. You dared not make any forms of PDA unless Theo initiated it. You stopped doing that last week when you felt him tense up grabbing his hand in the hall. 

You weren’t completely oblivious. You knew something was going on, but you just didn’t know what, or why. However two weeks ago you got the confirmation you never wanted. It happened later after dinner. Theo told you he had to go to the quidditch pitch to help train the new chaser again. However you happened to run into said chaser, quite literally, as you were headed back to the common room. 

You had turned the corner quickly, stuck in your head about everything going on in your relationship and not paying attention to where you were going. That’s when you slammed into a strong chest, arms grabbing hold of you so you didn’t fall down. 

When you looked up, you saw the face of the very person your boyfriend was supposed to be with. “W-why aren’t you with Theo?” 

He looked confused by your question so you continued, “Aren’t you supposed to be on the pitch with him? You’ve been training with him for like the last two weeks.” 

His face fell, “Sweetheart…we haven’t done any training together since I joined the team.” Your chest was tight, like someone had hold of your heart and was squeezing the blood from it. 

“I-erm, I have to go,”. You pushed away from him, walking quickly back to the dorms. He called after you but you didn’t hear him. It was like the blood squeezed from your heart was rushing to your brain making you deaf. 

You found yourself walking to Theo’s dorm instead of yours, wanting to confront him and not delay the inevitable any longer. 

But that’s when you caught him. Caught him right in the act. As soon as you opened the door you saw him, naked and tangled with someone else. His eyes locked with yours, and there was no remorse. 

You closed the door behind you, he didn’t even follow you. You saw the girl he was with go towards the girls dorm. She avoided your gaze. At least she felt guilty.

You stayed in the common room, hoping maybe Theo would try and find you. Try and give you an explanation, but he never came. 

'Cause karma is my boyfriend (karma is my boyfriend)

Karma is a god

Karma is the breeze in my hair on the weekend (weekend)

Karma's a relaxing thought

Aren't you envious that for you it's not?

Sweet like honey, karma is a cat

Purring in my lap 'cause it loves me

Flexing like a goddamn acrobat

Me and karma vibe like that

It was Enzo who found you that night. Enzo who asked you why you were crying and what was wrong. Who swore to you he didn’t know what Theo was up to and offered to hex him if it would make you feel better. 

You found yourself spending more time with him. It got your mind off Theo and he was treating you so kindly. 

Surprisingly Theo seemed bothered by your new interactions. But you didn’t care, he lost that right when he did what he did. 

When he started rumors about you being the one who cheated with Enzo instead of the truth, you were hurt. But Enzo was there for you, wiping your tears and letting you cry on his shoulder. 

He told you that it didn’t matter to him and he would stick by your side the whole way. So today, when whispers and conversations were still happening around you, you held your head high. 

You walked by Theo in the corridor, his eyes trained on you the whole way as you walked up to Enzo. He greeted you with a hug and a kiss to the top of your head. Your relationship was platonic, but you could see how to the outside person it may seem like more. 

You didn’t notice Theo come up to the two of you, “Taking my sloppy seconds, Lorenzo?”

You stiffened at his words, but Enzo was quick to defend you, “Seems like you’re the one who got sloppy Theodore.” 

You chanced a look at Theo, his jaw was clenched. Enzo didn’t stop, “Shame you were such an ignorant bastard. You never deserved her in the first place.”

Enzo put a protective arm around you, pulling you into his side. Theo opened his mouth to reply, but Enzo pulled you away, headed toward your next class together.  

Theo was left standing there, steaming. Karma was a bitch.

[aroseforj]

my first success story of the summer!!!

(technically it ain't quite summer yet, but you know what i mean) i figured it would be fitting if my first original post on my loa blog was one of my most recent success stories, so here we go <3 okay, so this is a tad embarrassing but i am a huge fan of the muppets and also disney world (no, i'm not a disney adult--i swear.) so, when disney announced that they were shutting down the muppet show at one of their parks in florida, i was completely and utterly bummed. i was so sad as i had so many fond memories of watching that show throughout my childhood, but also because a trip to disney is insanely expensive, so i didn't think i would be able to ever see it again in my life, especially not on such short notice. now, when this happened i was very much a baby manifestor--i don't even think i had ever heard the term "law of assumption" at the time, but i had a very basic understanding of how manifestation worked, so i tried to implement those practices in my life. whenever i saw a post about the ride closing or if my thoughts would randomly drift to it, i'd tell myself "it sucks that it's closing, but i'm going to see it one last time before it shuts down" or "i'm going to get down to orlando in time to see it again." i wouldn't force any of these thoughts, i wouldn't say these things to myself 25/8, i wouldn't even question how it was going to happen--i just lived my life knowing that somehow i'd be able to experience it again soon and that was that. well, cut to a few months later and my family and i are literally going to be at the park on the ride's last day later this week :D

this is literally a screenshot of me back when the news was first announced, (jokingly) begging for someone to fund my way to orlando. honestly, up until a couple months ago, whenever i wanted something, i would make jokes and comments like that--i would always tell myself that what i wanted was out of reach and that unless some miracle happened, i would always be shit outta luck. but that couldn't be further from the truth lmao. since that day in january, i've had so many successes: this trip, great grades on my final exams with minimal effort, a family member randomly giving me $200 when i was flat on my ass broke, $2k in two weeks. no savior descended from the heavens and gave me these things, i simply told myself that i had them and i did. 🤷🏾‍♀️

i'm still getting my footing with the law of assumption and every time i open this app i feel like i learn something new from y'all, but it's honestly so insane how easily you can shape your reality when you just let go and live your life knowing you already have what you want. like, that's it. but, if you've read this far, thank youuuuu!! i probably didn't format this post the best and i can certainly aimlessly ramble a lot, but i promise i'll get better at posting here soon. <333

[cravingstudyvalidation]

26/1/2024 (rough week, in desperate need of a hug)

yea so ladybird was right about that, been feeling very depressed for the past few months actually, nothing really makes me happy anymore. I swear I've been trying to find joy in the smallest things but it's been really hard. I have never talked about this before but I was diagnosed with su1c1dal depression a few years back, it was really bad but I did get better, some days worse than others and it started getting really bad the last few months. I don't have the drive to do anything, and studying has been especially hard but somehow I managed to pass my exams last term with decent grades and I've already got my term 3 exam timetable as well.........

there's really no other option other than to just keep going, I don't have time for breaks or shit bc like AS levels are just so far away yet so near and I have to start preparing for it srsly.

not really big on goals for this year, so here r the 2 goals that I want to or attempt to do this yr:

get over my fear of math(math was and still is my most feared sub and I think my fear of it is what makes me hate it and stops me from doing well in it, so I really wanna get over that fear this year, not completely but just get somewhat confident in it)

fix my sleep schedule, like get actually 7hrs of sleep every day and not just have a 3-4hr nap before waking up for skl

If you made it till here, thank u, ily and I hope u have a nice day xx.

[ridiculously-over-obsessed]

How about: “we’re stuck in this never ending loop, you keep coming back. just stop.” “stop what?” “coming back.”

Angst incoming!! Hurt my heart a little with this one I won't lie djlksdjlkgjd

broken trust prompts

Chloe unlocked the front door to the Bella House, a warm feeling in her chest. It had been months since she had last seen the Bellas, letting them think that this was the year that she had actually graduated, but she had instead tanked her Russian Lit exam again to compete with them for the third year in a row. They were her family, how could she just walk away and move on with her life? Besides, it meant that this way she could stay close to Beca, something about the short, smirking brunette pulled her in, intrigued her, made her want to stick around just a little longer. She was going to be so excited to see her.

In fact, this early before the start of the new school year, Beca would be the only one home. She stayed behind in Georgia over the summer break to work at the radio station (much to her father's chagrin) and had simply kept living in the Bella House while she did rather than having to have found a temporary apartment. Chloe was so excited to see her, to spend some quality time with just Beca before the Bellas joined them.

"Honey, I'm home!"

"Jesus!"

The living room was dark as Chloe stepped into it with a huge grin, Beca's startled voice coming from the direction of the couch. The lamp clicked on, revealing a dishevelled looking Beca hastily buttoning her shirt, a slightly annoyed look on her face as she unstradled the waist of the sophmore that she worked at the radio station with.

"Chloe? What the hell are you doing here?"

"Sorry." Chloe giggled, wincing a little as she realised what she'd interrupted, "I didn't realise you'd have company!"

"Yeah, well I wasn't exactly expecting anyone to barge in on me two weeks before the start of term." Beca frowned, Chloe feeling the warm feeling start to dissapate as she realised there was no amusement in Beca's face or tone, simply irritance and a degree of anger, "I thought you'd actually graduated this time Chloe, why are you here?"

"I tanked my Russian Lit exam again..." Chloe shrugged, feeling a blush start to creep up her neck as something akin to shame washed through her, "I wanted to stay with you guys, keep competing with the Bellas, I... I just wanted to surprise you."

"Yeah well you certainly did that..." Beca scoffed.

"This feels like a private conversation..." The woman Beca had been making out with got off the couch, adjusting her skirt with a sheepish smile, "I'll text you later Bec."

She kissed Beca's cheek as she left, Chloe feeling something make her stomach twist as she did. She had no right to be jealous, it wasn't as if Beca was doing something wrong, they were nothing more than friends. At least, she thought they were anyway...

"Why are you mad at me?" Chloe asked as they heard the front door shut, feeling tears start to well in her eyes. This was not how she had expected the day to go at all.

"Maybe because you keep intentionally failing your exams to sing acapella?!" Beca raised her eyebrow, "Or you don't tell anyone that you're doing it again?! Or that I finally felt like I-"

Beca cut herself up with a shake of her head, lips pursed angrily, arms crossed over her chest.

"Why do you keep doing this Chloe?"

"Because you guys are my family." Chloe bit her lip, "And we have so much fun competing and spending time together, I didn't want to give that up."

"Oh my god..." Beca rolled her eyes heavily, "Grow up Chloe! Aubrey still sees us but she also has a life, you're the one clinging to your college years, it's just sad!"

"Becs..." Chloe pulled back a little from Beca, nostrils flared as a tear slipped down her cheek.

"You keep doing this, you keep coming back and acting like it's not that different, that it's not kind of pathetic that you're failing deliberately because you're too chicken shit to be an adult and have a life!"

Beca was shaking as her own angry tears burst forward, hands clenched into fists by her side. She hadn't meant to go off on Chloe, it wasn't that she hated her or anything, but seeing her after she thought she might finally get to move on had caused a level of pain and frustration that she didn't know it was possible to feel.

"We’re stuck in this never ending loop, you keep coming back! Just stop!"

"Stop what?" Chloe was exasperated as she yelled back, not understanding where all this anger had come from.

"Coming back."

Beca sagged a little as she saw how heavy her words had landed on Chloe, running her hands through her hair as she shook her head. She didn't want to upset Chloe, or be mad at her, or hurt her in anyway, but she'd had enough. Had enough of swallowing her feelings for best friend, had enough of Chloe's drunken flirting that she didn't remember in the morning (or at least pretended she didn't), had enough of the frat boys that Chloe trotted in front of her. She didn't want to hurt Chloe, but Chloe kept on hurting her.

"Chloe I..." Beca sighed heavily, "Do you even like me?"

"Of course I do." Chloe cried, "You're my best friend, I love you!"

"No..." Beca could feel herself getting frustrated again, "I mean do you like me. Do I occupy your thoughts all day, do I make you feel invicible and vulnerable all at the same time, do you love me?! Because I love you... I love you, and I've been trying not to for years because it fucking destroys me, and every time I think I get to move on, you come right back to taunt me all over again!"

"Becs..." Chloe looked horrified as she stepped towards her, but Beca took a step backwards from her, "I didn't... I never... I didn't mean to hurt you."

"I know." Beca whispered, "I know you didn't, but you did and I... I can't keep doing this Chloe. It is killing me to just be around you and pretend that I'm not feeling all this intense stuff. I finally found someone that I can be somewhat normal with without feeling guilty about doing it right in front of you, and you show up again..."

"I'm sorry..." Chloe shook her head, "I really am Becs, I'll... I'll stay in a hotel until the semester starts, find an apartment, take my make up exam early-"

"Stop it..." Beca groaned, "Stop... stop shaping your life around other people Chloe. If you want to stay here, then stay. If you want to compete with the Bellas again this year, compete again. I'm not going to stop you."

"I don't want to hurt you any more than I already have..." Chloe's arms wrapped around her own waist, sniffing softly, "I really never meant to Becs."

"I know." Beca swallowed thickly, "But I can't help but notice you never answered my question, which is an answer in itself I guess."

"What question?"

"Do you love me?" Beca's jaw clenched, scanning Chloe for any kind of visible reaction, "Not as your friend but... do you?"

"I..." Chloe stammered, opening and closing her mouth, trying to find the words, "I don't know."

"Then you don't." Beca swallowed thickly, wiping at her cheeks with the back of her hands quickly, "Which is okay, you don't have to, you can't help it if you don't. And I don't want us to stop being friends Chlo, but... it's a little hard being around you one-on-one, and I think it's going to take some time for it to not be weird."

"Beca, you're my best friend..." Chloe sighed, wanting to hug Beca but knowing that this was absolutely not the time, "And I do love you like my best friend, I just don't think I'm in love with you... I'm sorry, I'm not gay, I wish I realised how much I'd been hurting you."

"It's okay." Beca shrugged, forcing a tight smile, "I um... I'm going to Holly's tonight so you can get settled, we can start Bella prep next week if you want?"

"You don't have to brush this under the rug Becs." Chloe frowned, shaking her head a little, "We can talk about this."

"No offense, but I really don't want to." Beca snorted a little, "Not tonight at least anyway. I just want to do a little underage drinking and makeout until I forget this whole conversation even happened."

"Okay." Chloe nodded, knowing better by now than to force Beca to have a conversation she wasn't ready to have, "But why don't you get Holly to come back, I can stay in a hotel until the other Bellas are back, I don't want you to feel uncomfortable because of me."

"It's fine." Beca ran a hand through her hair again, grabbing her satchel and jacket that she had dumped by the sofa when she and Holly had come in, "This whole thing kind of killed the vibe in here anyway. I'll um... I'll text you tomorrow or something. The Bellas will be really happy you're here again Chloe, they love performing with you. God knows what kind of mess I'd make of the choreo if you weren't here."

Chloe didn't say anything else as she watched Beca leave, wanting to run after her but not knowing what she'd say. What was there to say after that? After she had broken Beca's heart without even realising she had, after she had accidentally led her on for almost three years at this point, after she had been so insensitive to her feelings. How had she mess things up so badly?

She sank onto the couch with her head in her hands, heart heavy, a sick feeling in her stomach. Beca hated her now, resented her coming back to Barden when all she wanted to do was move on with her life. She'd had a point, Chloe was afraid of moving on after Barden, afraid of not having the safety net of the Bellas to catch her, but... what if being hurt only Beca more?

What was she supposed to do now?

[rainix13]

just me venting lmao, will probably delete later

no real trigger warnings i guess, I just don't think anyone wants to read this and it's kinda long-ish lol

I'm so fucked and it's my own fault and I lowkey hate myself lmao

I was having a decent good weekend

I studied, did some cases (I'm studying law - at least so far i guess)

Last week we could send in one case and idk what it's called but it's Übungsleiter in german lol

I suppose you could say trainer or sth

Well anyway, he just sent me mine back

And to say the least I'm fucked

I knew that beforehand because hhhh

somehow I know a whole bunch of facts. And apart from that I know how to write a letter of advice (again, I'm not sure it's the correct term but it's better than Gutachten i guess)

But I just can't out those to together and obviously if I can't connect the what with the how both things are basically useless

I just feel like I'm too stupid for this shit bc I genuinely don't get it. I don't even know what I don't get, it makes no fucking sense. I should be able to connect it but I'm not. My friend here (yes it's only one lmao) doesn't have the problem and doesn't understand me.

Our exam is next Saturday, obviously I'll keep studying but istg it feels impossible.

From what I hear around me I seem to be the only one to be this...useless

I thought I finally left my 'shit, maybe i actually am a failure' behind when I finished school last year and started uni but no lol

If I don't pass I could technically try to get through 3rd semester and if I don't pass exams in 3rd I'm unable to continue to study law

The stupid stupid thing is that it's even fun sometimes but I'm just actually so bad at it

This already was my plan B, because my dream job thingy was to become a pilot at the air force here but my eyes are too bad lol

I'm just lost rn

Everyone's gonna be so disappointed if I don't make it, not just my parents (idgaf abt my mother honestly) but my old teachers, my friends idk

I just wanna stop disappointing people and myself

I just wanna be able to get one fucking thing right but for some reason I can't get right what everybody else here can ugh

And I can't talk to the guy I'm studying with bc he doesn't get it, my normal friends are just like 'ja das wird schon' (= don't worry, you'll be fine)

I just went back to say that I'm doing fine and everything is going fine whenever someone asks. I've been there, most people were I guess. I'm fine but inside is a battle that's been going on for weeks now and I don't even know for what end I hope anymore.

And my bestie is somewhere in between. That's for me rn somehow the worst

Because she believes in me

The one person who believed in me and went with me through everything and never judged me too hard believes in me. And of course she doesn't understand what I mean. She's studying something completely different.

But she believes. And I feel like it's impossible to live up to that unspoken expectation. My best friends are the ones from school and all of them seem so happy with what they're studying. They pass most exams and I'm so happy for them.

But I want that too. I want to have fun, which I do, but I want to be able to continue to do this. I for once want to be good at the thing that's fun as well. I wanna be at least decent in the shit I'm studying and not be ex-matriculated (?) because I'm to incompetent to be good at this.

Plan C is basically to go back to Plan A and join the army (either airforce or navy) and sure i'd like that to but like...

What if I fail again and again and again and again....

I can't switch subjects and jobs for the rest kf my life, I wanna be happy and good at something at the same time

I don't wanna disappoint everyone I care about

Why can't I? I m just so frustrated with myself because I don't know what to do to be better but at the same time it feels like I'm not doing enough

+ I'm missing almost all pride events that I could've gone to this year and it just really really frustrates me ngl

[bluemerakis]

HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! how are u? i'm stressing over my new theme but i think it's getting good thank god! and i'm thinking abt watching some animated series that a friend recommended to me. what did you do today? are you okay? what was the last thing you watched? sorry for so many questions i just feel soooo bored rn

DOLLISHVIE MY BELOVED IS THAT YOU?? oh your new user and theme is so freaking gorgeous im in love <3 you’re so real for that bc themes are so stressful for no effing reason 😭 LET ME MAKE MY DIGITAL HOME LOOK ALL PRETTY AND COSY IN PEACE❗️❗️ don’t even stress your theme is looking so incredibly scrumptious and soft ugh i adore it 💌

ooo please do share what animated series you’re going to watch? why do i think it’s arcane and if it is THEN YES YES YES A 10000 TIMES. i love animation and i need new things that i haven’t already watched a concerning amount of times!!

and don’t ever apologise for too many questions hehe i love little convos like shit interrogate me and i’ll be like hell yeah 💅 since i only just woke up now lemme just tell you about my day yesterday—i visited my farm for the first time in two and a half months, and i got to see my beloved horsie <3 he’s doing very well, but struggling a bit with his weight :(( we’re gonna try and work on that and because winter’s coming round, the grass is going to be more luscious, so hopefully the extra grazing will help!! i did a full evaluation of him to see where he’s most painful and then i treated his back and gave him lots of carrots for being the best boy ever. and then i went for a lil ride but the weather came down on us so im going again today and hopefully will have a much longer ride!

i am indeed doing okay! i am trying to take advantage of this weekend to relax and do whatever the hell i want because although i am on a term break now, it’s only for a week and unfortunately my sadistic college scheduled two exams for the first week we’re back, so i have to get back to studying on this coming monday 😔 might not get to write as i had initially planned for but we move ig! and i’m meeting up with a few of my friends throughout the week before i have to drive back to college so i’m super excited for that <3

the last thing i watched is spirited away by studio ghibli! i was such a studio ghibli fanatic growing up, so i was feeling nostalgic hehe. before that i watched the newest episode of yellowjackets that came out on friday and before that i was binging modern family. i ordered pizza and was snuggled up in bed bc it was storming outside AND i was home alone bc the fam were all on a mission so i was having the time of my life with the space all to myself 😸

how are you doing sweet angel? <3 anything exciting going on for you at any point?

[the---hermit]

5. Ultimate educational goals? 15. Class that you’ve always wanted to take but never had the chance? & 30. What are you the proudest of out of all the assignments you’ve ever had?

Hello!

5. Ultimate educational goals?

Honestly? I have no idea. I don't have big goals, I am terrible at imagining myself in the future. I want to study as much as I can and strive for the best results as I can. I don't know what I'll end up doing after my masters, if I'll follow the little voice in my head who tells me to take the additional exams for another masters degree, or if I might look to apply for a phd. I am someone who works very well on short terms goals, but is shit at long term goals. I don't think I have ever written a worst answer in my life sorry jdfjskjf.

15. Class that you've always wanted to take but never had the chance?

The have been a couple of egyptology classes that I really wanted to take but I couldn't. Currently I also found out there's a queer studies class that I doubt I'll manage to add to my study plan, and I'm devastated. It sounds so cool I'd love to even just get the materials and study on my own, but it's not going to be an option.

30. What are you the proudest of out of all the assignments you've ever had?

Okay so I haven't had a lot of assignments in my uni life. As I have mentioned in other posts most of my exams are oral, which means I rarely have additional works before the exam. Last semester I had to write a paper for my English class and I must say I am very proud of it. I worked so hard and I am really satisfied with the result. It was focused on queer themes in The Merchant Of Venice, and tho before writing the paper I was really nervous because 1. I am not used to having written assignments as I said, and 2. I am an history major not a literature student, I am really happy with how it turned out, I think I did a good job. I don't know if it counts but I am also very proud of myself for a presentation I had to do in a seminar during my ba. We were still in lockdown so it was all done online, I was super nervous to talk in front of everyone but I remember I was so interested in the topic I really went for it, and the professor complimented me for my passionTM which I think it's my strenght. If I get excited about a topic I can defeat my anxiety and I also think it really shows if I am genuinely excited about the topic which obviously makes a good impression. Wow it was nice to go down memory lane and think about proud moments of my academic life thanks for asking this particular question I feel better about myself now lol.

Send me a studyblr ask!!

[s0rcererkiller]

hey baby!!! i’m at home now and oh em gee my exams today actually went okay!!

my first exam was maths and it was really good! i felt quite confident with it heheh

and obviously my last exam was criminology and i was super stressed but it went okay!! the questions i wanted to come up came up so i was happy but i did yap the whole time!! i think im gonna resit it next year as i am still not 100% confident i did like extremely well 💔💔

but i’m so happy it’s over with!! i have two more exams left for this term and they are in june so i have loads of time to revise!!!

- 🍹

so proud of you, baby. know you were gonna do well. smart girl.

heh. cute. good job, doll.

think you're gonna do a lot better than ya thought you did. stress n shit makes ya doubt but i know you did so good.

rest lots for now, yeah? gotta relax n reward yourself. you worked so hard baby. take it easy for ji now, alright?

[mollieinboraland]

LAST HOPE ~ CHAPTER 16

💝🫦🏙️🔥

Word count: 2.1k

Rating: 18+ (MINORS DNI!)

a/n ~ oh here we go 🤭

~~~~~~~

‘Tell him to fuck off,’ Yoongi shouts back, his face red. His eyes never leave Hoseok’s face, and he digs his nails into Hoseok’s thigh, smirking as he groans beneath him.

‘Hyung, I think it’s important,’ Jungkook says, his voice muffled by the door. ‘He has bags.’

Hoseok is out of bed in an instant. He doesn’t even stop to consider the fact that his aforementioned shrunken pyjama shorts are leaving absolutely nothing to the imagination.

Yoongi manages to pull on his shirt before he heads into the living room to find Namjoon standing in the doorway. He does in fact have bags. ‘What the fuck are you doing here? It’s two in the morning.’

‘Really, hyung? I didn’t realise!’ Namjoon hisses. ‘I should call Seokjin and tell him it’s insensitive to kick me out so early in the morning, we’re clearly interrupting your sexy time.’

Hoseok tries to ignore the way Namjoon gestures at his crotch, but he does cover himself with his hands.

‘Why did Seokjin kick you out?’ Hoseok asks, his voice soft. He senses that Yoongi’s about to say something inappropriate, and gestures at him to keep his mouth shut. Hoseok isn’t happy about having their “sexy time” cut short either, but they have bigger problems right now.

‘We had a big stupid fight,’ Namjoon shuffles into the room, dropping his bags on the floor by the door and slumping onto the sofa.

Jungkook opens his mouth, likely about to protest that the sofa is in fact his bed for the night, but apparently thinks better of it.

‘I don’t want to talk about it,’ Namjoon says sulkily, and Yoongi rolls his eyes.

‘You barge in here when I’m about to fu-’

‘I think what Yoongi means,’ Hoseok glares at him. ‘Is that you’re more than welcome to stay the night. Jungkook, you take Yoongi’s room.’

Yoongi looks like he wants to protest the last point for about thirty seconds, before Hoseok shoves him back towards his own bedroom.

Jungkook grabs his stuff from the sofa and hurries into Yoongi’s room, obviously sensing that Hoseok wants some space.

Namjoon sighs. ‘I really don’t want to get into it right now.’

Hoseok nods, pulling Namjoon into a hug. ‘Sleep on it, tell me in the morning.’

Namjoon nods, but takes a deep breath and speaks anyway. ‘He asked if I was seeing someone else. He asked if I was cheating on him.’

‘Excuse me?’ Hoseok inhales. ‘Why the fuck would he think that?’

Namjoon runs his hands through his hair, pacing across the room. ‘Well he doesn’t think that, not really, he just said it because he was mad but it still hurt and-’

Hoseok hugs him again, holding him tight against his chest.

‘I’ve been studying late, what with my assignments due and the end-of-term exam next week. He’s just mad that I’m too busy to take him out.’

Hoseok sighs. ‘He’ll get over it, he’s just-’

‘Being a brat,’ Yoongi supplies, appearing behind them. ‘He’s such a hypocrite.’

Namjoon frowns. ‘He’s always working late. Half the time he sleeps at the office, and when he comes home I’m studying, or working, or in class. We’re both busy.’

‘It’ll be okay,’ Hoseok gives him a weak smile. ‘Seokjin has a lot going on, he’s just stressed and he’s taking it out on you, which isn’t right, but it’s what’s happened.’

Namjoon sniffs. ‘I’m stressed. I’m tired, and busy, and I have more deadlines looming over me than I can count on one hand. But I’d never say that.’

‘I know you wouldn’t,’ Hoseok hugs him tighter, pulling a face at Yoongi over his shoulder. He was terrible at this. ‘But I know Seokjin is probably sitting at home feeling like utter shit and wishing he could take it all back.’

Namjoon grumbles something, but it’s muffled against Hoseok’s shoulder and he can’t make out the words.

‘I know he’s sitting at home feeling like a total dickhead right now,’ Yoongi comments, ‘because I’m witnessing it as we speak.’

Yoongi holds up his phone, the screen currently being bombarded with frantic text messages. He passes it to Namjoon, and Hoseok glances at it.

Seokjin hyung

Yoongi

Yoongi please tell me he’s at yours

I can’t face calling Tae about this

Or Jungkook

Especially not Jimin

I’d never hear the end of it

Yoongi

Why the fuck would he go to theirs?

What help are they going to be right now?

Seokjin hyung

Yoongi omg concentrate

What’s he said

Is he okay

Is he freaking out

Is he mad

Yoongi

Hyung jesus

Calm the fuck down will you

He’s fine

Well I mean he’s not fine obviously

But he’ll be okay

Seokjin hyung

I’m such an idiot

I’m a total dickhead

Why did I even say that?

I was just so mad

And it doesn’t even matter

We’re both busy. All the time. Why did I even say it?

Yoongi

Because you were mad

And you weren’t thinking

We all say shit we don’t mean when we’re angry

It’ll be fine

You just need to apologise

Seokjin hyung

Really?

You think he’ll be okay?

Yoongi

Yes

He will be fine

Say you’re sorry

Say you didn’t mean it and it was just a stupid thing you said in the heat of the moment

Seokjin hyung

Okay

God I feel like such a dick

I am a dick

Yoongi

Yeah

You kind of are

So come and apologise

And do it now please because MY dick was about to be

Hoseok snatches the phone away. Namjoon’s cheeks are red, and Hoseok can’t tell if it’s because of Seokjin’s panicking or Yoongi’s final message.

Hoseok slips out of Namjoon’s grasp, passing Yoongi his phone as he heads to the kitchen. Seeing as they’re all up and awake at two o’clock in the morning, they might as well have something to drink.

He busies himself making four cups of chamomile tea, humming quietly as he listens to Yoongi laugh humorlessly with Namjoon about the current sorry state of their friendship group.

Bringing the cups into the living room, Hoseok hands one to Namjoon and one to Yoongi, placing a third on the coffee table just as the door swings open and Seokjin stumbles in. He’s a sweaty mess, and Hoseok has no doubt that he just ran the whole way here.

Hoseok grabs Yoongi’s hand, still clutching his tea. They practically run back to his bedroom, the door clicking shut behind them as Seokjin crosses the room in two long strides.

They collapse onto the bed, Hoseok barely managing to set his cup down before Yoongi is kissing him, his hands in his hair.

‘I could have killed him,’ Yoongi mumbles into the kiss.

Hoseok smirks. ‘I know, why do you think I got up so quickly? I had to get to him first.’

Yoongi wastes no time pulling his shirt off. It’s only then that Hoseok realises he never put his own back on, and he shivers. Yoongi pulls the blanket over them both, settling back on top of Hoseok as he had been before they were interrupted.

‘Say it again,’ Yoongi whispers, his lips turned up in a smirk. Hoseok rolls his eyes, leaning up to kiss him and biting his lip hard enough to make the other man hiss.

‘You need…’ Yoongi prompts,letting his fingers trail down Hoseok’s chest and towards his hips.

Hoseok is suddenly aware of just how tight his pyjama shorts are. He shifts uncomfortably.

‘I need these off,’ he gestures at them, hoping to avoid the real question.

Yoongi snorts, moving to the side so that he can tug Hoseok’s shorts and underwear off as he leans down to kiss him.

Hoseok inhales. It’s what he wanted, but he feels suddenly exposed. Yoongi leans back, his eyes travelling down before Hoseok can stop him from looking.

Yoongi kisses him again, his mouth and his neck, his chest and his stomach, his hips and down until Hoseok lets out a soft whimper.

‘Okay?’ Yoongi smiles, and Hoseok is torn between pulling him up so he can kiss him again, or encouraging what is currently happening.

Thankfully Yoongi makes the decision for him. He tugs his own jeans down over his hips.

Hoseok tries to grab the fabric, wanting to be the one to undress him. He sits up, pulling at Yoongi’s jeans until they’re free and he can throw them onto the floor alongside everything else.

Yoongi’s still wearing his underwear though, and Hoseok huffs impatiently as Yoongi’s finger traces the same route his tongue had travelled only moments ago.

Hoseok grabs the other man’s hips, pulling him down until he’s laying beneath him on the bed. He tugs Yoongi’s underwear off, dropping it to the side as he drags in a breath.

‘Hey,’ Yoongi chuckles, sitting up. ‘Calm down, there’s no rush.’

Hoseok blinks at him. He’s been dreaming of this moment for God knows how long, and now Yoongi is telling him to calm down?

‘You were the one complaining that Namjoon had stopped you putting your dick-’ Hoseok bit back before Yoongi silences him.

Hoseok’s head is spinning. Yoongi tastes sweet and hot and God it’s addictive. His hands move back to Yoongi’s hair, tugging and twisting the soft, dark strands between his fingers.

‘More,’ Hoseok moans, and Yoongi smirks at him.

‘More what?’

Hoseok pouts. Yoongi knows exactly what he wants. ‘Don’t tease me.’

Yoongi shakes his head, flipping them over so that he’s on top of Hoseok so quickly he thinks he might have whiplash.

Yoongi’s tongue is back to its old tricks, pausing at the most sensitive areas and leaving Hoseok trembling.

Hoseok’s hand finds Yoongi’s head, and without even realising what he’s doing, he’s holding Yoongi in place. His chest is rising and falling rapidly, his heart pounding.

‘I thought you didn’t like initiating,’ Yoongi smirks, making him gasp. ‘I thought you were going to be shy.’

‘I don’t,’ Hoseok mumbles, ‘I am.’

‘You are not,’ Yoongi shakes his head, ‘You’re holding my head down so I suck you off, that’s not shy.’

Hoseok opens his mouth to argue, but suddenly the only noise he can make is a strangled moan.

‘Fuck,’ he breathes, thrusting forward without even meaning to. Yoongi makes an involuntary rumbling noise at the back of his throat and Hoseok bites his lip to stop himself from screaming. Too many of his friends are in his apartment right now. He needs to be quiet.

Yoongi sighs, his fingers digging into Hoseok's hips. Hoseok thrusts forward again and Yoongi rests an arm over his hips to hold him down.

‘You’re going to choke me,’ Yoongi mumbles when Hoseok whines. ‘You’re so impatient.’

‘It’s so good,’ Hoseok moans, tugging at Yoongi’s hair.

Yoongi moves away, licking his lips. ‘What is?’

Hoseok just glares at him, and Yoongi shakes his head with a soft laugh.

He moves back up the bed, planting a kiss on Hoseok’s forehead.

‘We need-’

‘It’s in the drawer,’ Hoseok nods towards the bedside cabinet and Yoongi snorts as he reaches across to rummage in the drawer.

‘You’re ridiculous,’ Yoongi says fondly, pulling the bottle out and shutting the drawer before settling back onto Hoseok’s thighs.

‘You love me though,’ Hoseok pouts, only momentarily wondering at how quickly they’ve gotten used to throwing that word around.

‘I do,’ Yoongi smiles, flipping the cap and pouring some onto his cupped hand.

Yoongi reaches down slowly, one of his conveniently lubed fingers lingering just above where Hoseok wants it to be.

Hoseok shifts, and Yoongi takes it as the invitation it is. Hoseok bites Yoongi’s shoulder to stop himself from screaming, but if the way Yoongi moans is anything to go by, the other man doesn’t mind.

When Yoongi shifts, Hoseok looks up at him with a dazed expression, his eyes slightly unfocused.

‘Ready?’ Yoongi kisses him softly, and Hoseok nods.

He goes slow, pausing to let Hoseok adjust. He kisses his forehead, his temples, his cheeks.

When Yoongi pulls back, Hoseok tries to follow him, pushing his hips forward until Yoongi presses him down into the bed, his hands gripping onto his hips.

‘You don’t make it easy, you know,’ Yoongi groans. Hoseok bites his lip so hard in an effort not to scream, he tastes blood against his tongue. He winces.

‘You want it to be easy?’ Hoseok manages, his voice shaky.

Yoongi leans back, reaches out and swipes the blood from Hoseok’s bottom lip with his thumb.

‘No,’ Yoongi smirks, as his boyfriend cries out into the darkened room. ‘I want it really, really hard.’

[endofapaige]

New Year New Nothing: Here's to 2022

The new year has arrived and I missed the entire morning. Apparently there’s something about new years that means sleep schedules no longer exist, 1pm? The perfect time to wake up.

The whole point of new years is to look back on what you did and try to start a fresh. Make resolutions and stick to them. I always make the same one. I want to get fit before the new school year starts. I’m going to university this year, actually fulfilling that one would be great. But what do I plan to do today? Sit on my arse and read.

This new year new me thing has never sat right with me. Every year when the clock strikes twelve you can bet I go to one of my friends ‘good vibes only this year’ and I’m being ironic, of course I am. Because in what weird world would there be good vibes only. Isn’t it the mix that makes the year good? The good sticks out more against the bad? I don’t know, I’m getting philosophical. Either way, I do believe this year will be no different to last.

I won’t get fit, I probably won’t revise much more for my A-Levels (I really need to, I need to get into university). Nothing of much interest is happening this year outside of education. Nothing fun planned. No big holiday in the summer. I have an empty plan with one of my best friends to meet up over Easter, I’ll keep you updated on that one. Hopefully I’ll pass my driving test, hopefully I make use of my 3 month summer and not just sit on my arse and read. Hopefully calm will be enough to get me through the year and I won’t look back this time next year, being 19 and finished my first term of university and think ‘well that was shit I hope next year will be better’.

I’m scared for my A-Levels I won’t lie to you, I’m horrified that I’ve gone all these years doing so well in school, skipping over my GCSEs thanks to Covid, and now I’m here, actually having to do my exams. And I’ll fail them all. Maybe August will be the month that truly determines if 2022 will be great or a huge disaster. For once New Years resolutions are looking pretty important.

I know New Years Day is a huge sham, but I hope you, wherever you are, whatever you’re doing, are having a good day. And I God hope the universe isn’t against us this year. We’ve had two years of bullshit, surely we deserve a break?