#I DO! I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THE MASH TIME LOOP THEORY

[thesunsethour]

person at this college event with a t shirt that says “please talk to me about the mash time loop” HELLO. mashblr is so tiny do you follow me. do i follow you

[pomegranate]

Hi I'd like to ask about the mash timeloop theory is it so that they repeat every day as a timeloop or is it a loop that lasts 11 years? I know that there are some jokes that could be taken as them timelooping but is there like a primer of sorts with the rules of it? Does every character loop or only one of them?

Hi anon! Oh this is a fun question and thank you for giving me an excuse to talk about MASH and time loops. First off, I will say I don't think there's any one interpretation of the time loop idea that has any merit above others - some people see the time loop as being the act of re-watching MASH over and over, putting Hawkeye back in Korea after finishing GFA. The time loop is also inspired by the series' lack of continuity, which can be easily explained by MASH airing at a time when continuity was not considered for a long-running television series. The Korean War was a 3 year war and MASH aired over an 11 year period. Other people don't necessarily subscribe to the time "loop" theory but rather just that time itself is wonky in the MASH universe, which is why I like my dear friend @mashbrainrot 's "time trauma" tag that covers any sort of questionable references to time throughout MASH.

Because the thing is - the show starts off with a time abnormality. The second shot in the pilot has the text "KOREA, 1950 / a hundred years ago" - meaning the pilot is addressed to viewers in 2050, which is an interesting idea to consider. But does the text fit with the time loop theory? It doesn't necessarily feel like it's part of a "loop" but it's still noteworthy, considering this is how the series starts.

Throughout the show, we have one-liners about the length of time that the MASH surgeons have spent operating. Frequently they liken their time in the O.R. to an eternity or a lifetime, and if we want to take a Doylist approach to these references, it's just the MASH writers using hyperbole to stress how these surgery sessions are all the same, one after another, dragging on and on. But the time inconsistency comes up in other ways, like the episode "A War For All Seasons" - a season 9 episode which inexplicably takes place between New Years 1951 and New Years 1952. It doesn't make sense timeline-wise if you look at the other dates given throughout the series before this point, but the writers weren't thinking about previous seasons when they wrote it because that is not how episodic television worked at the time. And then you have stuff like Henry & Potter having kids/grandkids of different ages, depending on the episode. Potter has his first grandchild in s4 but in s5 "Dear Sigmund", he says he's got a granddaughter about the same age as a patient who is approximately 7. There is absolutely zero point in trying to figure out a "realistic" timeline for MASH, in the end. It was a television show made during an era where episodes couldn't be rewatched endlessly and continuity wasn't really a big deal. It was enough that characters like Henry, Trapper, Frank and Radar get referenced long after they'd left the show, but there was no "show bible" and no long-standing plan for how the series would turn out.

WHICH IS WHY it's fun to play with the idea that a time loop is at play; maybe the loop resets every time a significant character leaves the 4077th (this was someone else's idea but I can't remember who at the moment I THINK maybe Kit (@nedlittle)?) or maybe it resets when you as a viewer restart the show. Or maybe it resets in other little moments; maybe it's not one continuous loop but a series of loops throughout the series. I don't think there's one agreed-upon theory when it comes to the MASH time loop but I do encourage everyone to check out Helen's time trauma tag to see some really great posts about the concept AND share any ideas of your own about time wonkiness within the MASH universe! (ALSO there are two great videos on the timeloop concept that i will reblog following this post)

[barbatusart]

how do you come up with ideas for music? do you like... "hear" a new melody (or what have you) in your head, and then try to recreate it? or try random things until something starts to sound good? i get how people come up with visual ideas for art and verbal ideas for writing, but music? it's arcane (and you're a wizard)

a student wizard at best lol still tons for me to learn but i get what you’re saying. honestly there is a method to melodic stuff but melody is the same as inks in that you need your base “sketch” first of chord progression. ill go on mindfulharmony & start putting together random chord sequences, & for that that’s half vaguely remembered musical theory and half innate know-how or what i like to call: mashing chord sequences together until something sounds nice. after that i bring them into reaper & start dissecting them out so different instruments are playing different parts of the chord at different times to give it texture and intrigue, & then ill give myself some breathing room to do: The Melody.

for doing: The Melody i have literally no idea how to explain how to do this, you have to either have ingrained harmonic ability or have studied/played around enough to have developed harmonic ability. you’re basically trying to find a musical through-line that will navigate through each chord. i think with music making, incorporating chord progression can be daunting at first because it’s constructing a maze you need to figure out how to weave through later - but honestly once the chords are in i hardly ever have the melody in mind, i just set it to loop get my keyboard out & start playing in the space until something ive played “talks” to me enough to want to record it down. does this make sense lol

i think this track in particular illustrates the process i was talking about OK!

[rondo-dev]

The Mindgame Meta - when high skill meets low skill

You're at home with a friend wondering which game you want to play. "You up for some Street Fighter 6? It's pretty sick!", you say. Your friend looks at you a bit scared. "Never played it, but sure."

You boot up the game, give your friend a cheap knock-off PS5 controller, and get into the character select screen. "You can play Marisa, she's pretty easy.", you tell your friend. They hover over her and decide to go with your suggestion.

You know you're going to absolutely wipe the floor with them, but you'll hold back a bit. Keep it interesting.

The characters face-off against each other in the loading screen, you make your character pull a funny face, because you know you can do it. Your friend doesn't, but is probably too focused on their own character and all the unfamiliar sequences.

FIGHT. You move in, ready to play footsies and dominate the neutral game. Get a hit confirm and follow-up with a 6 hit combo. Meaty them when they get up. Cross-over into a super. Wiped. Your plan falls into perfect place in your mind palace.

And yet, as soon as you walk close, your friend runs in like a total baboon and hits your character. Okay, fine. Beginner luck.

They do it again.

And again.

And again.

The sound of what is button mashing eminating from the crappy controller next to you. What the hell is going on?!

MARISA WINS appears on the screen while your friend laughs like a maniac. Stunned, you rematch and go in with absolute concentration.

A repeat of the previous set. Hundreds of hours down the drain and this is the result. You're done with this game. Your friend can go play story mode or something, it's fine. Play something else, even.

Hard and soft skills

Almost all multiplayer games where you play against another player have some amount of depth and skill expression that you learn over time. As you play against, understand, and apply these mechanics, you will become a better player and thus climb the eternal ladder of elo/mmr/other arbitrary number based ranking system.

This number then, in theory, matches you with players of an equal skill level. They may be better at some mechanics you're not well versed in, but perhaps you're better and other mechanics. You didn't get to that rank with sheer luck.

This loop ensures that you will always be exposed to challenges, forcing you to improve if you want to climb and meet more difficult opponents.

I'd consider most of the above "hard skills", where the game tells you "you can do this". However, when you reach higher and higher ranks, "soft skills" become more and more important. What I mean with that is both strategy and getting in your opponent's heads (the mental game).

The Art of the Macro Game

To use mobas as an example for strategy, there's a lot of guides talking about the right way to play the macro game (aka map movements). Do x and y and you will win games. And yes, it probably is the most optimal way to the play the game, you'll get the most amount of gold and apply pressure around the map, forcing your opponent to do things they don't want to do. Perfect!

But what if they just don't have a concept of what the right way to play is? What if they suddenly, at a really bad moment, decide to group up and walk to your location to kill you?

It makes no sense!! They could've done so many other things that were more optimal to try and get you, the high skill player, out of the game! And yet, they did exactly that.

High skill players have an expectation of how the game should be played, and when the reality of a low skill player's strategy (or lack thereof) meets expectation is when the high skill players may ironically be beaten.

Pressure mounting

"gg ez". You feel your anger boiling. They worked 50 minutes for that win filled with insults and questionable comments, damn it! How can they even say it was easy?! You let your emotions get the better of it and write a novel of text in the post-game chat to verbally humiliate your opponent (and make yourself feel better). It doesn't work. You took the bait. You're done.

That's one type of mental game, though not the one exclusive to high skill players. But it is one that anyone can use. Wittling away at someone's mental game is, I think, a big part of how OG won the biggest tournament in Dota twice in a row. Not by typing things in games, of course, but by taunting on Twitter and by making very unconventional moves to target the "star player" of the opponents team. I mean, how would you feel if you already have a lot of pressure on you to win the mid-game for your team, and then you also get ganked and killed before the 10 minute mark? You'll start making mistakes and being predictable by sticking to what you know. Creativity goes out the window.

You may think these are underhanded strategies, but for any competitive game and sport, not tilting is always part of the game. I think it is simply another layer of competitiveness. Keeping your cool is an art on its own.

A dependency on the opponent

There will always be things higher skill players will be better at. Last hitting in lane, knowing when to go in for a kill, higher situational awareness, keeping better track of resources, and much more. These foundational concepts are the things they will always rely on to try and pull a win out of the bag.

What differenciates these things, in a vacuum, is that they don't necessarily rely on the opponent to do something. You know that you can get more last hits. You know by instinct that you have 4 bars of resources to pop into the next combo. You know you can do your super move after certain moves.

The difference comes from where you need to interact with the opponent directly. So when you're ever in the situation where you need to play against a lower skill player, do not overthink things and try to punish the "dumb" moves they are making or find gameplay patterns you yourself can exploit.

"If I don't know what the hell I am doing, how the hell are they supposed to know what I am doing?"

[mcrcki]

well, that sure was a scream of a time !! but now that the vampiric dust has settled, and the ten hour loop of the monster mash has been switched to ‘closing time’ i think it’s about right to get a post event plotting / starter call going !! like always, my rules are super simple : like for a plotting dm !! and then SPECIFY characters for the starters or like deadass i will not write it! the cap is four per writer !! i just wanna make sure i get to write with everyone!! 

** please note that i am more than happy to keep event threads, transition them or write them out for a little bit longer before switching them over! or just start something new!! i lowkey don’t remember all of the threads that i had pre event since i cleared those out before we started, so if you wanna drop something feel free, i will decide as i see each one posted what the vibe is !!! 

but y’all know the drill , below is too much information and me thinking i’ve got jokes about each of my babes after the halloween masquerade massacre!

daniela dimitrescu || resident evil : village  - ( 0 / 5 )

she/they pronouns. daniela’s review : “best party i’ve been to in so long, but your monsters could have been more durable. 4 out of 5 stars. will be back to steal the white house as my own home.” literally had such a blast and is more than a little bummed when the doors finally unlocked. will be vibing, looking for more victims, maybe find a girlfriend, who knows.

please let them flirt with you, they might leave you alive if you do :)

leia organa || star wars - ( 1 / 5 )

she/her pronouns. WORST. BIRTHDAY. EVER. and also the biggest flop of a honeymoon to date. baby girl is down bad now, if y’all thought she was all in in the sith before, it’s 10x worse now after what happened with han. any conversation with her rn?? doomed to fail. she will be inconsolably furious. i am so sorry for the somehow more rancid vibes from coming from the oval office.

han solo

marlene mckinnon || harry potter : marauders era ( 0 / 5 )

she/her pronouns. alright, she’s not afraid to say it. the white house should be barred from ever throwing parties again. this is what?? the third time something like this has happened?? absolutely never again. free drinks at mckinnon’s for anyone who went to this thing. the bar is open and marlene is gonna be going back to normal life with her now complete again friend group and pretending she’s not gonna fight every death eater she sees, but absolutely will be doing that.

free starter?? free shots. respond below

omega archeron || star wars : the bad batch ( 1 / 5 )

she/they pronouns. omega’s down !! bad !! you thought they were a mess after this whole messy breakup / acting out bc of their brothers hiding their genetic identity??? just wait till you see them after watching hunter die !!!! and being completely helpless to stop it!!!!! welcome to omega’s self destruct era, who wants to be a terrible influence for her!

sion val palpatine

pj halliwell || charmed ‘98 - ( 0 / 5 )

she/her pronouns. unlike the rest of my girls, lowkey ?? kinda thriving. like okay, yes, is she very stressed about the memory status of her family? sure, who wouldn’t be. but she’s got her whitelighter, she’s at least got almost all of her family here??? she actually made it out of this alive and is gonna be doubling down on training. also, got some of those venders numbers before everything went to shit. throwing a “we survived” party, who’s coming!

respond for a clown behavior starter

rowena ravenclaw || harry potter : founders era ( 2 / 5 )

she/her pronouns. not doing great, not doing terrible. will be doing everything she can to throw herself into her work, and to figure out what the hell is going on with the memory magic in this city. if anyone wants to listen to some pepe silva level rants about theories, she will talk your ear off for hours. maybe someone please drag her out so she stops sitting in her office for sixteen hours straight.

orpheus

hunter

sella palpatine || star wars ( 1 / 5 )

she/her pronouns. hey thanks for checking in ! WE’RE HAVING A TERRIBLE TIME. literally please can someone put her family in a fucking fortress or something, she is so tired of seeing the people she loves get hurt. will be attempting to convince her brother she deserves a weapon of some kind. gonna start self defense training or something. if someone wants to help sella learn to fight, hmu

sion val palpatine

sophie hatter || howl’s moving castle ( 4 / 5 )

she/they pronouns. freshly unaware babey 😇 sophie is a little thrown off, is very self conscious of the neck scar they got as a child that has definitely always been there. still running the flower shop, but more hands off, as their main passion is in fashion designing, and uses the flower shop to showcase their designs. aware sophie was more controlled and composed. unaware sophie, very unapologetic in their bluntness. why keep your mouth shut when something annoys you smh.

xie lian

howl jenkins pendragon

prince justin

chihiro ogino

tatum riley || scream ‘96 ( 0 / 5 )

she/her pronouns. this hangover kinda sucks, but at least she made it out alive. will be changing her instagram bio to ‘final girl’ and clinging to that. she actually made it out. that’s what matters. she’s got more family here, and is sort of just looking for something chill. but it has solidified that yeah, she hates halloween and masks. anyone wanna go decorate for christmas already??

new final girl unlocked, let her brag to you!!

victoria sutherland || twilight ( 0 / 5 )

she/her pronouns. pretty fun night, even if she spent most of it absolutely glued to james. she has her mate back and man she’s about to be even more insufferable. still very much looking for some snacks on her way out, or just any casual bites throughout the month. we’re vibing, we’re having fun. we’re fresh, flirty, and thriving. 

who’s looking for a nice bite ;)

[marley-manson]

Heyyy 👋🏼 If you feel like talking about it, im wondering what your thoughts are on the mash timeloop fan theory/lens of viewing the show? Assuming youve heard of it around mashblr, if not i'll comment again to explain.

Thanks for asking!

Honestly lol my answer might be kind of boring because I'm not really all that into it?

I'm not completely sure why actually. I totally get where it comes from - Mash has a completely nonsensical timeline and there are some meta jokes about it and references to the war going on forever etc. It's an easy lens to jump to.

I guess maybe I don't really get into it because it takes something that I prefer to see as like, some cutesy references to the fact that the show lasted longer than the actual war, as well as a minor thematically appropriate addition to the "war is hell" theme through suggesting that it feels drawn out and that they're stuck there forever, and gives it centre stage by turning it into a full-blown tangible allegory.

And idk, the subjective experience of time is just not the aspect of the war trauma theme that I find the most interesting, and not the one I'd pick as a big significant metaphor. It just doesn’t compel me.

There’s also an aspect to the fanon that I think is kind of rooted in like... taking incidental aspects of a narrative and projecting them onto the text in a meta sense? Like all those ‘these characters were always dead, you can’t escape the narrative, every story is a ghost story’ vibes, where the inherent functions of narrative are given meaning. And unless the text is already quite meta - moreso than Mash, which is not notably meta imo especially compared to a lot of sitcoms - that whole way of looking at fiction also kinda leaves me cold. So taking the way the show ran 11 years and has continuity issues and the characters have no agency bc they’re fictional and giving that significance within the context of the story just isn’t really my thing. This is a bit more broad than just the time loop lens but I’ve definitely seen time loop takes with this kind of vibe so I think it’s related at least.

It's funny because I'm actually a big fan of groundhog day fics as a trope, but I'm not really that into them in Mash fandom. Maybe... well I like groundhog day fics because they're fun, they're a good way to explore a character and a relationship, and I enjoy fics where a ridiculous premise is taken seriously, which groundhog day fics tend to be. A mundane canon with a magical fic premise that just rolls with it and only concerns itself with how the characters realistically react to it is my jam.

But the whole timeloop Mash fanon is more about an allegory for trauma and... I guess I'm just not that interested in that vibe lol. It doesn't have the fun stuff I want from groundhog day fics ime, and it's not my preferred way of delving into the trauma theme, I suppose.

This is of course just my own personal taste. A lot of people really get something out of the time loop metaphor and I think that's awesome. I definitely don’t want to knock anyone who’s into it, I think it’s a totally legit and pretty creative and cool way of reinterpreting the story and exploring some of its themes. It just doesn't really land with me and my preferences wrt fiction and analysis, at least from what I’ve seen in the fandom so far.

What do you think of it?

[has-gilgamesh-doneanythingwrong]

SLEEPOVER☆CHAOS

In which my mastersona, Seihai-kun; joins Gudako and Mash for one heck of a fun sleepover!!!

Secrets and hidden emotions are finally exposed! ;)

(naw i just like sleepovers)

Cold, billowing gusts of snow rattled against the glistening window panes; as the mundane, clinically white halls of Chaldea sparkled like brand-new.

Yes.

For the first time in ages, Seihai had volunteered to assist with the cleaning!!

'Well, it was either to help with clean-up or join the servants for a session of group counselling with Kiara...' The mere idea of pouring their heart out to their fellow allies made a cold shiver run down Seihai's spine.

No way in hell did they want to let others know about their inner demons; especially not when he was also attending today's session. To Seihai, that was akin to a recipe for disaster.

And in addition to that, Kiara was eerily perceptive as a counsellor. It'd be IMPOSSIBLE to hide anything from her. Seihai had seen how even Gudako's cheery outer self faltered before Kiara's intelligent wiles.

'It's much more relaxing to clean the place instead.' Resting their vibrant red cornrows onto one of the latest prototype model of the Chaldea Speedmop 2000 (nightingale had an entire stock of them in order to keep chaldea as clean as possible), they sighed.

Life had been a real struggle as of late for Seihai. Lacerating wounds. Ferocious beasts. Storylines bursting at the seams with treachery and Machiavellianism. In other words, the missions were hell. It was tough- unbearable even- to carry on, to keep on pushing forward like Gudako, Mash, the Staff and Servants were; but deep down, Seihai knew that they had no choice but to follow ahead.

However, it grew. A festering, deep pool of regret; self-abasement and shame. Was it really alright for Seihai to be here? Weren't they just a nuisance? Were they even worthy? Did anybody at Chaldea even care about them, anyway? Who could they open up around?

As a horrendous deluge of negative self-talk smashed into Seihai with all the force of a tidal wave; encasing them within a moment of anxiety so painful that they felt as if they were about to drown- a miracle occurred.

'TAP TAP!!!!' Tapping them ferociously on the shoulder, Seihai leapt out of their very skin to face such an intrusive force. "H-HOLY SHIT WHAT THE FUCK- oh, Gudako."

"What do you mean by 'oh Gudako'?!! It's none other than me, Gudako; your beloved homie and most trusted ally!! I was looking for you. Kiara was disappointed that you couldn't make it to counselling today. Told me that she's happy to meet you one-on-one, if you got some extra time." Gudako all but winked, as her golden eyes glimmered mischievously.

'You little shit,' Seihai couldn't help but laugh at that. "Alright, I'll visit her tomorrow. How was the group therapy?"

"Oh, it was awesome! We all had a good laugh, shared our stories and gave each other some support." Gudako was more or less beaming with joy. "It's so nice here, in Chaldea. Everyone's so supportive of one another. There's no shame here, Seihai. I hope you know that."

"Haha, of course I do!" An itchy, aching laugh that was even faker than the fakest of plastics erupted from Seihai's throat. Well fuck, looks like their skills at faking had subsided greatly as of late.

'Oh shit...she's onto me..' Seihai recognized that expression clearly. Gudako's eyes were wide, almost brimming with tears, as her eyebrows arched incredulously.

That only meant one thing- she was finally onto Seihai's bullshit.

"Hey, Seihai. If something's up, tell me! You always listen to me ramble on and on about all of my feelings too. Let it out!" Gudako gives Seihai a friendly shake of the shoulders. "AH!!!!"

"Oh lord, Gudako. What's happened now?" Seihai guffawed softly at Gudako's vibrant pose. "You got a new idea? C'mon let it out!"

"Oi, you're the one who needs to let things out more!!! I am doing perfectly fine, thank you. Well anyway. Seihai?"

"Come with us. Join us on our sleepover tonight. Let's chat, just like old times. You, Mash and I. How does that sound?" Gudako's expression was apprehensive, linking her palms together. "I want to help. If that's okay with you..."

'SHIT, I'M WEAK TO SLEEPOVERS!!! DAMNIT!!' There was something so precious, so special about being privy to the personal thoughts and opinions of others; that Seihai was infinitely weak towards. And a sleepover with Mash and Gudako? Lucky!

Seihai instantly looped their ebony hands with Gudako's scarred palms. "Look, I'm going. You better bring some popcorn and snacks, or I'll drain your room of food, Gudako!" Seihai's joke brought a smile to Gudako's face immediately.

"Hell yeah! I'll see you at 10. You better not flake on me!"

Gudako was most certainly one of the most beloved homies around.

SLEEPOVER TIME!!! (yeet)

Decked in the most casual pyjamas and a pale gray dressing gown, Seihai trooped into Gudako's room with all the force of a warrior. It was time to commence battle!

'ONWARDS I GO!!! YOU'VE GOT THIS ME!!!' Seihai slammed into the door as bravely as they possibly could. 'YEAH BOI! I AM NOT NERVOUS, I AM WORTHY AND AWESOME! I am valid, I've got this!' With an entire array of self-affirmations tucked under their sleeves, they boldly seized their targets.

"Yahoo, beautiful ladies. It's me." Seihai posed languidly, as an excited Mash and ridiculously energetic Gudako ran up to her. "Wow, this is my first time here...nice room you've got, Gudako."

Gudako's room was filled with an array of posters, dvds, cds and technological gear; however neon lights also paraded the walls, giving it a very 'cyber beach party' feel.

"Oh damn, the finest one of them all has arrived." Gudako smirked, swaying from side to side. "I'm glad you came."

"Me too...Senpai was yammering on and on about how she wants you to join in with us more often," Mashu beamed softly, tucking her hands politely behind her back. "Thank you for making it here. Truly. I am very grateful for this."

At this, Seihai's eyes widened with shock. They were so used to being alone; and dealing with everything on their lonesome. So to see these two seem so joyful by their mere arrival came as a deep surprise to Seihai. 'Y-yo...I can't handle this...Shit.' It was time to clam up.

Awkwardly ruffling ruby red locks of hair, Seihai turned to the side. "Don't worry about it, I think you two are great people. So...what have you both got planned for today?"

"Well, senpai and I usually tend to enjoy a good romance movie..." Mash began.

"...And imagine ourselves in their situation as well." Gudako's grin was enormous, as Mash's cheeks flushed ever so slightly. "It's so much fun when we do that. Mash and I have very interesting viewpoints on romance. Hehe." Gudako's expression was wistful and warm, her eyes filled with affection.

'Damn, they've got it bad for one another...' Seihai blankly mused. 'Are they just close friends? Are they in love? Hell if I know,' They wondered.

"B-but, as you're here, we wanted to make things much more simulating for you as well. So we decided to choose a legendary movie..."

"... that's named SHREK." Gudako's face was extremely serious. "The movie that fucking destroys all other movies, because it is just that darn good. What do you say? Want some SHREK TIME??"

"Of course, Shrek is love AND life, after all." Grabbing a huge bowl of popcorn, Seihai sits to the right of Mash and Gudako. "How may times have you watched it?"

"I've genuinely lost count..." Gudako sighed. "How about you, Mash?"

"Only twice...I don't really understand the jokes and references made..." Mash hung her head dejectedly. "Sometimes I wonder if these movies are wasted on me."

"That's not true at all, Mash. I have all the time in the world to explain them to you. You won't be left out, alright?" Ruffling Mash's hair softly, Gudako smiled blissfully.

"Senpai...Thank you. In return, I shall explain all sorts of magecraft theories to you so that you can rise above all of the clock tower mages. I'll be cheering you on!"

"Aah, Mash; what have I done to deserve someone as good as you? C'mere." They were now snuggling closely together.

"Yep, Mash! You heard Gudako. This movie isn't wasted on you at all! All knowledge has to start from somewhere. You may be lost now, but you'll eventually possess enough referential knowledge to enjoy this soon. Be nicer to yourself, okay?" Ah, there it was. Seihai couldn't help but throw out some positive vibes. Worried that they had gone too far, they cringed- only to be met with wide smiles.

"You're so right, Seihai!" Gudako was now caressing Mash's hair. "Hehe, you always give such wise advice."

"Seihai, you're so kind...Thanks." Mash grinned.

"Ah, no problemo! Just didn't want to see you hurt yourself."

As Seihai quietly watched over the two's warm cuddling session, a slight pain twanged at their heartstrings.

In Chaldea, they had no connections as close as that. There was nobody like that for them, whose arms they could be held in; who they could bond with so closely. Nobody who they could cry with in the worst of times; nobody who they could while away the darkest phases of night with...nobody at all.

It had always been them, and them alone.

No matter how many people they connected to on a surface level; how many people they met and spoke to; who they relied upon and trusted within their lifetime- Seihai had never experienced a close bond with anyone.

For the first time in a while, the arid, bitter taste of jealousy clawed across their throat.

'Ah man, they're so cute. Kinda wish I could love and be loved like that too.' Seihai silently watched the movie besides them, as blue rays of light danced upon their face. 'Damn, now I'm mixed between feeling both happy and jealous for them. GUHHHH!!!'

Sometimes... being emotionally distant from others sucked.

But they couldn't let desperation consume them. Whenever they were desperate for friendship and love, they'd let the wrong people in, and would end up even more battered and bruised than before...

'I just gotta keep on being my own pillar of emotional support, no matter how desperate I am for some hugs.' Seihai sighed.

'If this is the price I have to pay to live honorably to my true self, than so be it.'

"So...Mash, Seihai. Let's share some secrets. Have any of you got somebody who you like? Fess up to your dear Gudako!!!"

What was once an extremely loud and rancorous viewing of Shrek (Seihai laughed throughout the entire thing, as Gudako cracked an inane amount of jokes) had now become none other than a GOSSIP SESSION.

'FUCK...' Seihai's face paled at this. Of all the topics to discuss, why did it have to be this??? Whilst Seihai's face was creased up with pure pain and terror, Mash was blushing like a cute tomato.

"W-well senpai, I...You see, I..." Gudako was leaning in so closely towards Mash that she was bordering on pinning her to the wall.

"Hmm, what? What is it, Mash?" Her voice was a husky whisper. "C'mon, tell me who..."

'Bruh. GUDAKO!!! That's not helping at all.' Seihai wanted to facepalm at their antics. 'They really are this dense to each other's feelings, huh.' It was adorable, yet somewhat amusing to watch as well.

"A-AH! I GIVE, I GIVE!!" Pushing Gudako to the side, Mash panted in agony. "S-SEIHAI! WHO DO YOU LIKE??"

"OI, DON'T THROW ME UNDER THE BUS LIKE THAT! WHAT THE HELL!!!" Seihai couldn't help but yell, as a dastardly cold wind dashed through their spinal cord. "Fuck, well okay, there is somebody I like, but..."

"Spear."

'Shit...' Seihai's eyes were as large as saucers, as they spun in Gudako's direction; her smirk pernicious.

Did Gudako KNOW?!

"Looks like Seihai's in a spear of trouble." Gudako winked proudly at them. "Mash, save Seihai the embarrassment. We all know who they like already!"

"T-that's true..." Mash had finally calmed down, much to Seihai's own chagrin. "Yes, we do know."

"How? I mean, should I be worried by this??? How many of you know??" Seihai's arms pooled with cold sweat. "Damn you!"

"More or less the entirety of Chaldea?" Gudako admitted, chowing nonchalantly on a massive pocky stick. "You're not very good at hiding your emotions, you know. Seihai, we in Chaldea understand you much more than you may realize. You can open up a little more, you know?"

Overwhelmed by this, Seihai snaps for the very first time- their hazel eyes burning with repressed rage. "How can you say that, damnit?! How can you understand me, when I mainly hang out alone; when I can barely connect with anybody in Chaldea; when I don't even fucking belong in this damned place??? How can you say that, when I have a fucking useless one sided affection that I've been trying to hide, but everybody now knows of??? How can you say that Gudako??? You don't know shit about me, nor my feelings!!"

At this outburst, both Gudako and Mash's faces soured. Roughly gripping Seihai with her war-torn hands, Gudako shakes them by the shoulders, her golden eyes burning with passion.

"You don't think I see it, Seihai? How you fucking pour out all of your feelings by accident, only to withdraw back into yourself again? How you look longingly over at Mash and I, craving a bond of your own? How you reluctantly look over towards staff and servants, aching to talk to them but not knowing what to do? You don't think I see you crying, see your eyes fill with affection for a certain someone every now and then; that I don't pay attention to your feelings?!! I CARE FOR YOU, FOR FUCK'S SAKE!!! WE'RE FRIENDS, AREN'T WE?!!!"

"S-senpai, stop! Seihai, I'm so sorry, Gudako just gets a bit...well, passionate sometimes." Mash manages to successfully pull Gudako back. "Err, Seihai?"

Tears. A flowing river of tears dropped from Seihai's eyes as they sobbed quietly into their palms.

Gudako cared?

Somebody actually did acknowledge their emotions, and actually looked out for them?

'What, what...It can't be...But I thought that only I could care for myself and understand my emotions that well...How could she?' Before Seihai could even look up, Gudako had wrapped them within a fierce hug.

"Seihai. Look, I don't know what's happened in your past, or what's convinced you to be your sole caretaker and self-support system without letting anybody else in." Gudako ruffles their hair. "But I want you to know, that you're NOT alone. Yeah, maybe you've not found your close homies yet. But Mash and I are happy to hear you out, we all are!! Even the person you like sees you as a friend, hehe. You don't have to worry about hiding yourself behind a mask of peerless positivity and self confidence anymore."

"Gudako..."

"You know, you were there for me when I was crying about having to be strong. And you know, I struggled to open up as well. But yeah, Mash...well she came along, and now I feel so much better! Look, I just want you to not beat yourself up for this. It's okay."

"Gudako, you're gonna make me cry. Damn, you're really hitting me in the feels today. I got a real case of the 'crying in the club at 3am vibes' right now."

"Oi, no making shitty jokes to cope. Here, we show our vulnerability like real warriors!" Gudako declared triumphantly, as Mash laughs.

"Gudako, I swear...you really are a wonderful homie. I'm sorry that I tried to hide away from you...I am so grateful that you care enough to seek me out like this. Thank you."

"H-HOLY SHIT, WE CRACKED OPEN THE COLD ONE. MASH TAKE A PHOTO!"

"Senpai, please stop the joking."

"S-sorry..."

"I'm glad," Mash also sat by Seihai's side. "I just want all of us to be happy. And Seihai, I am sure there are many wonderful beings out there that you may eventually grow close to! You already believe in yourself, which is a great start! I know you won't have to be so lonely anymore!" Lacing her palms together, Mash spoke a prayer. "I wish that someday, you will meet people too. And that you'll stop fighting alone."

"Mash, you're gonna make me explode with tears. You're being so nice right now that I'm going to cry." Seihai blushed.

"You heard her, Mash! Why are you so damn cute, I'm falling in love!!" Gudako was clutching her heart dramatically. "Ahhh....Mash is such a beauty!!! Thank you, for blessing me with such a wonderful person!"

"S-SENPAI!!! STOP!!!" As the two began to pillow fight, laughing all the while; Seihai smiled softly at them both.

'So I'm not fighting alone after all...I'm not the only person who values myself in this world anymore...' Seihai could finally put down the weapons that they had grown so used to aggressively defending themselves with.

From now on, they'd do their best to trust in Chaldea more. And maybe attend group therapy from now on, as well.

'So this is how it feels to open up to people.'

It was an unforgettable sensation.

THE END

holy smokes this is so fucking LONG

[thliahls]

it is very obvious i don’t know how family trees work but ! richard and dominique are her parents, although thalia doesn’t know anything about her mother including her name or what she looks like. thalia spent most of her upbringing under the care of tony and gong lau who ran, what could most readily be compared to a foster home for children of spies. many kids came and went, short-term stays of a month to a year most common, but thalia, along with archie and arella, came when they were around seven or eight and were the only three that stayed there pretty much full-time even after they turned eighteen ( until her dad found out about her boyfriend and blamed them for her expulsion, believing they had been complacent with her ). maggie’s their biological child who’s in their thirties now but would often frequent the house so the kids became just as close with them too. prose about her d*d under the cut, stream kyoto (copycat killer version) for clear skin ! @gallaghertasks

there's a gravitational pull that leaves thalia hall orbiting around her father. similar to how it is impossible for the sun and the earth to cut ties with each other, it is equally as impossible to not regard everything through the eyes of richard hall. over the years he has become equal part man and myth, fragmented the way memories do over time. she is unsure as to whether that is his real name, the same way she is unsure about everything else that composes his being. while it is likely that he has a family, and as an extension, that she has one too, he has cut the cord between himself and them. no one arrives in this world untethered, but if anyone could, it would be him. he has always been alone. it makes her very existence a mystery.

the first time she learned about her father was through him. it is one of her first memories, before she lived with her guardians, when it was just him and her. the accuracy tilts between reality and fiction, further skewed by her father's insistence that it never happened at all. she does think it seems absurd, something pulled from a high art film that plays on a loop in contemporary art museums. perhaps she is making it all up. in this memory she is on her father's lap, in the bathroom, steadied on the closed seat of the toilet bowl. she is staring them down in the mirrored cabinet above the sink, and her father is trimming the ends of her hair with nail clippers, with meticulous precision. silence in their house always carries tension, she knows this now - she can label it, tension. when she was younger, it just had just felt like an invisible, nameless weight. when she breaches the silence it is with an existential question with a juvenile motive: "what will happen when you die?” look dad, only six years old and already thinking about these things. she wants so desperately to know what he values, is it her intelligence or servility? is it the way she hangs on to his hand when he sprints through traffic, how she doesn’t tug him back to the safety of the sidewalk, or is it the threat she poses when every once in a blue moon she successfully reads him? "you'll die long before i do sweetheart." that hadn't been what she meant. it hadn't been a threat or a thinly-veiled prophesy. it had been a six year old girl trying to act smarter than she was. that's all. the corner of the clippers nicks the fleshy part of her neck, and she's too much in shock to notice that she's bleeding. the next day she recites the question in the mirror, in different tongues and tones - she makes it sound like a threat to convince herself the way she'd said it yesterday wasn't one. they all blur together in the end.

the second time she gained insight to who her father was, was in the company of her guardians and siblings. "my dad's a deadbeat too." she'd die for this kid as easily as she'd kill him. the snivelling blonde haired boy who wipes his snot with the raggedy hem of his worn out t-shirt. she instinctively pins him down, his arms right angles as she secures his wrists into the dirt. his squirms are nothing more than flinches. "my dad's not a deadbeat." the blood drain's from his already pale face before he lets out a shrill pre-pubescent scream, and she presses a palm against his open mouth. her guardians hardly ever interfere, letting them go at it because it builds character. often at dinner, they'll discuss their day, sparing no details. that night, both her and archie are silent, prodding at mash potatoes, leaving their parents curious about their battle wounds: his shiner and her scratch that runs down the length of her neck, already scabbing. then, begrudgingly, because this silence feels like that invisible weight called tension, she says: "he called my dad a deadbeat. he's not." thalia's makeshift mom, guardian, closest person she's ever come to loving says easily in reply, "he's the farthest thing from it. men like him are invincible. they have nothing to lose." at first, the cruelty of it stings, whiplashed, a palm firm against the burner. but gong gives her an identity outside of her father: nothing. she is nothing, and for one, spectacular moment, it is liberating.

"he's a woman hater, he hates woman." is what her first and only boyfriend comes to understand about her father. her boyfriend, unaware of the spy world and thus the hate that breeds from it, thinks of billionaire magnates who don't respect women and men put dated, sexist jokes about wanting a girl to make them a sandwich in their bios. while she is well versed in feminist theory and the structures that are perpetuated to keep sexism in place, when he prattles on about how centrism is bad actually and that post-feminism isn't much better, with his overwhelming cynical attitude that she loves, she interrupts to say that wasn't what she had meant. what was the type of hate she's talking about? it's hard to explain: opaque and as dense as cement, it's virile, fertile too - it feeds on anything and everything, reproducing. it's got it's claws in love, it would gut her and kill him. "that's not what i meant." she doesn't have an answer prepared. "what did you mean?" he looks at her, willing to learn. she could tell him the earth is flat and he'd believe it, that's love. "he hates me but he'd never kill me. but he'd kill you to hurt me." there's a flash of panic in his eyes, before she smiles, a soft dimpled smile that makes him forget what fear is. they laugh it away, all this talk of hate, and it melts under warm breath. it is rendered less dense, it becomes extricable from everything else like they can pull it away as easily as a pesky piece of lint. like hate's a nuisance that's easy to rid, nothing more than a hassle. of course, when her father inevitably does find out, she never sees him again.

she talks to her mother in her dreams. thalia doesn't know what she looks like. sometimes she's working at a diner, in a putrid baby blue get up with a voice as sweet as treacle. sometimes she's a spy, wearing sunglasses too big for her face and a red lip that's smearing at the edges. she's never with her father in these dreams, but he's always there. she knows this because her mother is unable to maintain eye contact with her own daughter without looking over her shoulder. glass panes are a warning signal, she knows him inside and out. she knows him as a blurred reflection, a photograph, a body. she knows him this intimately so it's always her and never thalia. thalia has never met her mother, but she is a guardian angel all the same. the dreams end the same way, always. her mother repeats it like a mantra: "he is not the myth, i am." and thalia responds, "he is a man." they go back and forth like this, over and over until their words overlap, until it turns to a ritual, a chant that summons nothing but their disappearance. her mother falls back into the underbelly of her conscience, awaiting the next time thalia's dreams pull her to the surface again, and thalia wakes up. when she dreams of her mother she is often foggy for the rest of the day, and sometimes she believes that this grants her a temporary barrier from her father, that in the midst of lethargy and a lack of clarity, her thoughts are her own. she relishes in the privacy - and bares her teeth, a delighted wolf, in the face of this gift.

dreams never linger, she doesn't heed her mother's words. either of them. she doesn't becoming nothing and she mythologizes her own father to anyone who will listen. he is a piece of theory, jeremy bentham, panopticism. he is rules; how she uses her phone and what classes she takes. he's in her recollections of her summer break, he is six p.m on the dot. she's going to love him so much it kills him, the way he hates her so much it keeps her alive.

[stars-and-rose]

emily’s notes on dealing with INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS

so it took me an hour and a half to fulling watch the video because I ended up taking seven and a half pages of notes??? i might make a separate post analyzing the characters/the plot in Dealing With Intrusive Thoughts, but we’ll see. with that out of the way, please note that these notes are in chronological order. spoilers under the keep reading

 seven warnings. seven freaking warnings. shit has hit the fan

why is Thomas ME in the mornings

wait no THOMAS BABY AHHHHHH

Virgil and Patton’s expressions when they first come in, oh god, Virgil looks absolutely done and Patton’s playing the ‘nothing is ever wrong’ game again 

ROMAN. THERE IS SOMETHING OFF WITH MY SON AND I’M NOT EVEN TWO MINUTES IN

Patton singing to himself is pretty cute not gonna lie

“secrets secrets are no fun, share with me or else we’re done.”-Roman is me yet again

also “i have yet to receive my invite to the pity party” Ro i can’t-

okay so it seems Virgil Patton and Thomas all know something and they don’t want Roman to know

not gonna lie, watching these three play cover-up is pretty damn funny and Ro is on to them

I AM ONLY 2 MINUTES AND 28 SECONDS INTO THIS AND I WANNA C R Y

Roman calling in Logan for back up? WHOOOOOOO we stan

AHHHH SOMETHING IS VERY W RON G

Logan gets one FALSEHOOD a day?

honestly can't tell if they’re trying to protect Roman or they don’t trust him rn and ahhh that hurts

I’M VERY CONFUSED

i feel like i’m witnessing the logince vs moxiety war

so everyone but Roman knows and everyone but Logan is desperate to keep it that way

???????

 NO ONE IS OKAY

they’re all coming for Ro’s role as the Extra side, huh? we’re hitting some extremes

“you all are acting fishy.” “so what, i’m acting fishy, sush- sue me.” “don’t pretend that wasn’t on purpose.” Roman and Virgil at their finest

why isn’t Roman allowed to know about Thomas’s intrusive thoughts???

“i’m going to prohibit your breathing if you keep this up.” Virgil NO

Virgil Patton what are you doing 

Roman is not going to fall for that distraction

wait no he did

i think everyone is a wee bit high

“have you ever imagined killing your brother”-HOLY SHIT SHIT IS HITTING THE FAN

OH MY GOD THE HANDS BEHIND RO AT 5:58 I JUST SCREAMED

THERE IS A CREEPY RAT MAN BEHIND THE TV

Patton covering his mouth and whispering out evil, and Virgil dropping into his tempest tongue when they see creepy rat man AAHHHHHHHHH

OH MY GOD HE HIT ROMAN HE HIT ROMAN WITH A MORNINGSTAR OH MY IS HE DEAD

“it’s the Duke.” thank you, Logan, BUT WHAT THE EVERLIVING FUCK DOES THAT MEAN

The Duke is so freaking scary i can not-

state farm ad: everything in life is alright with state farm!

me, in hysterics only eight minutes in: nOtHiNg Is AlRiGhT

the Duke’s costume though... the clear elements from Roman but the inverted colors and the Duke feels gaudier

the Duke’s song is so creepy i can’t oh my god he'd been on screen for five minutes and he’s terrifying. The imagery, how dark everything is, how easily he moves around the other sides i’m chilled to the bone

did Roman call the duke bro??? um what???

also isn’t roman unconscious

I WANT MY ROMAN BACKKKKKKK

oh god what happened between Deceit and the Duke

the Duke is fucking terrifying. have i said that yet

i don’t wanna see the dark sides anymore! i’m good

that song is going to haunt me FOREVER

so the Duke is dark fantasies and corrupted creativity definitely Ro’s dark side

i no like

maybe the Duke was able to pop in because Roman’s been hurting recently????

HE JUST PULLED OFF HIS EARS OH GOD

Logan is the only one keeping himself together, i hope he can rationalize the Duke but i fear not

“you’re not creativity!”

“yeah! that’s the brave, handsome (Patton your gay is showing) unbeatable Roman!

*camera cuts to Ro still unconscious muttering about mashed potatoes*

Virgil looked so cute when he blew his bangs out of the way!

back to the angst

‘you’re scary’

*camera cuts to hurt/unimpressed Virgil*

ALSO THE DUKE IS NOT SCARY HE’S TERRIFYING 

everyone is pointing fingers ahahhahah

how quickly Patton believed Logan was actually Deceit OOF when the only evidence for this was based on the fact Logan didn’t agree with Patton/Virgil’s method of dealing with the Duke

Lo: *trying to logic through the situation*

Vee and Pat: please shut your mouth

Logan:*talks about how nothing is black and white*

Thomas: *points out the difference between Roman in white and the Duke in black*

which is an amazing visual for character!Thomas’s black and white thinking

and it’s also an amazing detail to contrast Roman and the Duke. i thought the contrast between Patton and Deceit's suits was cool in SvS, but this is another level

Roman is still unconscious on the floor. the Duke is standing over him. alright, trash rat bastard.

wow i can’t believe my favorite side has a twin brother that’s an actual rodent

holy shit Thomas is such an amazing actor i genuinely cannot handle it, applause applause applause

“Wow, I hate him.” YEAH ME TOO THOMAS

the entire side conversation between Logan and Patton regarding the cradle in the treetop is gold 

have i mentioned that the duke is disturbing yet? there is an EYEBALL on his shoulder

“...........maybe?” oh Patton bb you are trying but you’re not there yet

wow what happened between the Duke and Virgil, because the Duke really don’t like him

ROMAN YOU CAN G E T U P NOW

okay Virgil, that’s fine, break my heart

we’re still stuck on this “is Thomas a good person thing?”

WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO LOGAN YOU GO SMART BABE

the flashback is just as creepy every time it plays gOD

well Vee got in an uncensored curse

Patton is shook

Virgil legit looks at him like,”you’re really hung up on THAT right now?”

“I’m about to smash the hulk!” what is happening.

“One of you is enough!” yes and I’d prefer Deceit right now!!

Deceit is a shit but he’s a shit with a cause

the Duke is just a rat

Patton is really playing the ignore all our problems card,huh

that didn’t work his arc why is he trying it again???

“this isn’t about me wanting to be listened too” SHOT THROUGH THE HEART, AND YOU’RE TOO BLAME @ logan

Logan almost calling Virgil paranoid HURT

that brings me back to the whole “paranoviligant” scene from the Hogwarts video. both Ro and Lo have prevented themselves from calling Virgil paranoid, even though I feel like meaner things have been said. the word paranoid is significant then. 

also logan quickly fixing his mistake there damn i love him

Thomas pleading with Virgil and Patton hurt me so much AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

“well that can’t be where the bar is” WHAT A PARALLEL

Logan’s speech on religious really hit me. 

i’m Catholic, but I’m also Pansexual.

watching an openly gay man talk about Religion freely made me feel really happy and accepted and i might have cried

also it was such a good way from Logan to make his point

the Duke really threw Patton and Virgil through a loop, huh

LOGAN IS THE BREADWINNER LISTEN TO HIM G O 

okay, theory time: the Duke gets more powerful the weaker Roman gets and vice versa. so to keep the Duke away, Ro needs to get himself in a better place to figuratively defeat the Duke. but how can he get to that better place when it seems everyone is against him?

“i said figuratively. and that is why i say it. THAT *clap* IS *clap* WHY *clap* I *clap* SAY *clap* IT *clap* Lo really went off there, you go you funky little nerd

also Logan claps to emphasize his points a lot and it’s cute

“despite his best efforts, Virgil's could never stop being the bad guy~!” OUCH

you can see the vivid hurt on Virgil’s face when Logan says that it’s his faiult, it looks like he was slapped

and Logan quickly adding “oh and uh Patton.” 

“rEcOrD sCrAtCh?” shut up stinky trash man

and Virgil’s shock that he isn’t the only problem, that isn’t not completely his fault?

and logan’s shock in realizing he isn’t the problem??

not like i needed a heart or anything

wow the Duke finally realized that Logan is going to smite him only took 25 minutes

he really just went off on Logan and Lo’s not even fazed

did the Duke just-

yeah he vored the deodorant

i can’t take this anymore

THE DUKE’S NAME

first of all, he just gave it anyway like it was nothing. the others gave thier names at key moments for them, and the Duke is like, yeah I’m Remus

also I SAW the little look he gave Virgil he’s not fooling me

wait is that why he gave his name so early? to spite Virgil? because Virgil hid his name for so long and such?

that’s it I’m voring the stinky trash bastard 

second, the significance of the name itself. i’m assuming Remus is named after the Remus in Roman mythology. You know, the twins Romulus (hint hint RO nudge nudge) and Remus, the founders of Rome, but in the end Romulus killed Remus and became the city’s namesake

based on the connection of the names, and hoping that Roman is the Romulus of this story, Ro will be able to ‘defeat’ Remus one day

DID LOGAN JUST BARE HIS TEETH AT REMUS

he did OH MY GOD

Roman, still unconscious on the floor, telling Remus to shut up and defending Lo? we stan (one) creativity twin 

well Remus just shuriikened Logan in the forehead

Logan simply falling for a brief moment then fixing the wound? he’s really a badass huh

Logan just summed up this entire shebang by saying,”if things one and two stop fearing the psycho asshole he’ll have no power.” alright Lo you go

LOGAN ALL THE WINS

Remus is really fucking dramatic huh, really seeing how he can be Roman’s twisted twin

really, Ro is chaotic good and Remus is straight up chaotic evil

“is he gone” you can’t be falling for that they’re ten minutes left on the episode

they fell for it

Virgil’s brutal honesty in listening off Thomas’s problems oof

“what if you sniffed your dogs butt?” Remus is getting a bit milder the more Logan talks him down, Lo is truly a king

“just shut up” WHOOOOO THOMAS

Patton and Virgil listening to Lo? GIVE ME AN AMEN

now we just need Ro to jump on the listening-to-Lo-express

 AND LOGAN SAYING “IT’S OKAY” AND COMFORTING THE OTHER THREE  AND BEING GENTLE WHOOOOOOO NO MORE OF THAT EMOTIONLESS BULLSHIT LOGAN WE KNOW YOU CARE ABOUT THEM

Logan’s speech on therapy? FANTASTIC, GIVE HIM AN AWARD

Patton admitting and realizing his over controlling methods and flaws??? we stan character development

VIRGIL JUST CALLED REMUS A COMMON COLD I CAN’T

but really, Virgil telling Remus off and calling him a pest not worth his time?? a king

“it was just like old times!” the look Patton and Logan share, they definitely are aware of Virgil’s past with the dark sides/ possibly being one and they are done with Vee being harassed

STINKY TRASH BASTARD IS GONE

ROMAN IS NOT DEAD

but his line, “I can see now why everyone was reluctant to tell me what was going on.” confused me

why didn’t the other warn Roman that Remus could be coming? it’s not like Roman didn’t know Remus existed (they are literally twins) and the other knew Remus existed so I'm not sure what all the secrecy was about. if the sides warned Ro, he could have been prepared, and you know, not unconscious for most of the video.

EVERYONE IS SO CONCERNED FOR RO AHHHHH

literally i might have screamed

i definitely did

when Roman used the same insult/nickname as Remus to Logan, how distraught he looked oh god

maybe that’s why Roman’s so much of a perfectionist,,, he’s so desperate to not be like Remus, Roman forces himself to be the exact opposite and it’s causing him pain

the little smiles everyone gives Lo at the end??? AHHHHHHHH

Thomas thanking logan and calling him Cool, and Logan just sinking out in response?????

SOFT SOFT SOFT

the entire like thirty seconds Roman and Remus share the screen, RO looks so uncomfortable 

there has to be something else that happened between them,not just they being exact opposites... not sure on what

it also seems like Logan is getting better but Roman is falling down the rabbit hole and getting even worse

the funhouse mirror metaphor HURT

Roman is really coming for Patton’s nothing-is-ever-wrong game huh?

also just noting the parallels between Roman and Remus, the hand gestures, even how they both sink out with the same BYEEEEEEEE!

Virgil babey don’t blame yourself-

holy shit Virgil just dropped the mic

really that scene broke my heart

it wasn’t the reveal itself, but damn the delivery

Virgil looks on the verge of tears,puts himself out there and telling Thomas that he was a dark side and being met by silence???

my HEART

Thomas is such an incredible actor i cannot-

side note, how did Thomas not know? i believe the other sides know (someone please ask me about this so i can rant) and Vee was never exactly sutble about it and Deceit and Remus both taunted him about the past??

is character!Thomas just that dense??

so it seems like Logan is doing better, Patton is decent for the moment, but Virgil and Roman are both struggling right now

it feels like Roman’s arc is very drawn out, so i feel like things are getting worse before they get better

as for Virgil, i REALLY want the next video to be about how the past doesn’t define you and end with the other comforting Vee.

dear G O D why is Remus eating deodorant??

also, i really want to know what is actually the deodorant

or is Thomas actually eating deodorant

SOMEONE PLEASE CALL POISON CONTROL-

[instantaneous--indulgence]

Kinky Questions

Per request...

1: Kitchen Counter, Couch, or on top of the dryer?

I’ll say dryer, since that’s the only one of the three I’ve yet to do.

2: Your last sexual encounter: Good or Bad and why:

Wonderful. And I got some great pics to show for it. J

3: A fictional person that you think would be good in bed:

Myra Monkhouse, from Family Matters lol. She desperately wanted to put that thang on Steve Urkel, and she gave off a vibe that tells me that she would have worn him out. Her being cute and busty didn’t hurt either.

4: Something that never fails to make you horny:

Having my dick grabbed. Simple, effective.

5: Where is one place you would never have sex:

A church. Yet I’ve seen some clips of a woman masturbating inside of a church that absolutely got me off.

6: The most awkward moment during a sexual experience was when 

I lost my erection and all feeling in my dick due to wearing an “extended pleasure” condom that apparently had a numbing agent in it. And it was my first time ever having sex smh.

7: Weirdest thing that ever made you horny:

Nothing stands out.

8: What is the best way to sexually bind someone: Handcuffs, Rope, or Other [if other please explain]:

Probably rope, but cuffs get the job done as well.

9: What is the fastest way to make you horny:

Being directly told with urgency that I am yearned for and/or that my body/dick is needed. Also, receiving or seeing a nude image of someone I’m in lust with.

10: Top or bottom?

Top

11: We were about to ____________ but then ______________ [example: we were about to have sex but then his mom walked in]

We were about to take some photos of us in doggystyle from her POV in the hotel hallway but then our room door shut and we were suddenly locked out, naked.

12: Is one orgasm enough? Are multiple orgasms necessary?

One is enough as long as my partner is satisfied. Multiples are great when they flow naturally. As for myself, I often go sessions without cumming and still enjoy the sex immensely.

13: Something that you have hidden in your room that you don’t want anyone to find:

The two large containers of sex paraphernalia I have under the bed.

14: Weirdest nickname a significant other has ever called you:

I had a previous partner call me Wolfie, due to a patch of hair I have on my lower back.

15: Two things you like [or dislike] about oral sex:

Two likes: The physical responses. Feeling the vagina tightening around my inserted fingers while I’m teasing the clit with my tongue and lips. The clenching and contractions that build up and precede an orgasm. The body jerking, having my head grabbed, or being pushed away when the sensations are too intense. And so on. Secondly, I enjoy the taste and messiness of the flow of her fluids and my saliva comingling

16: Weirdest sexual act some has performed [or tried to perform] on/with you:

I can’t think of anything that I would consider weird. My partner and I both enjoy analingus, and I don’t mind a finger in my anus while receiving head or a handjob. Some might say those are weird.

17: Have you ever tasted yourself? [If no, would you?] [If yes, what did you think?]

I can’t say that I have

18: Is it ever okay to not use a condom

Yes.

19: Who was the sexiest teacher you ever had?

I honestly can’t think of one that stands out.

20: A food that you would like to use during a sexual experience:

Cake frosting, maybe.

21: How big is too big:

Depends on what we’re talking about lol

22: One sexual thing you would never do:

One-on-one sex with a male.

23: Biggest turn on:

Natural sexual chemistry.

24: Three spots that drive you insane:

Nipples, dick head, perineum.

25: Worst possible time to get horny:

Prior to any work interactions or on public transportation

26: Do you like it when your sexual partner moans:

Absolutely

27: Worst sexual idea you ever had:

Trying that damn “extended pleasure” condom.

28: How much fapping is too much fapping:

When you’re sitting in the same spot six hours later with multiple tabs of porn open and you’re still searching for the “right” clip to finally let yourself cum to. Or you wind up late to work or an engagement because you just couldn’t stop stroking.

29: Best sexual complement you ever got:

“You have me all turned out”

30: Bald, landing strip, Jumanji:

Landing strip is fine. I don’t mind hair though, so Jumanji certainly wouldn’t be a turnoff.

31: Is it good sex if you don’t nut:

For me personally, yes.

32: Fill in the blank: “If they ____________, we are fuckin”

Desire me, and I desire them, have good personality and sexual chemistry with me, are into (most of) what I’m into  

33: What your favorite part of your body:

My mouth.

34: Favorite foreplay activities:

Kissing, groping, dry humping.

35: Love (>,

?

36: What do you wear to bed?

It depends on the season. When it’s warm, I usually wear nothing. In the colder months, maybe a shirt and underwear. It varies.

37: When was the first time you masturbated:

I remember pulling my pants down and humping large baby doll my older sister had after we went to see the movie Mischief. I was maybe five at the time. I didn’t start really masturbating until I was 16-17. I didn’t masturbate to completion until I was 17-18, but I had definitely had some wet dreams prior to that.

38: Do you have any nude/masturbating pictures/video of yourself?

Tons.

39: Have you ever/when was the last time you had sex outside?

Last summer, mid-day, in a public park. Got pics of that too. J

40: Have/would you ever have sex outside?

Yes, and I’m looking forward to having more of it when it gets warmer.

41: Have/would you ever had a threesome?

I have not crossed that off my list…yet.

42: What is one random object you’ve used to masturbate?

When I was first figuring out how masturbating worked I once tried using a tissue paper roll.

43: Have/would you ever masturbate at work/school?

At work, but never to completion. It was mainly just to take pic/video to send to a partner.

44: Have/would you ever have sex on a plane?

I have not. I have received a handjob on a Greyhound bus before.

45: What is one song you’d like to have sex to?

That I haven’t already done so to? I can’t think of one.

46: What is something nonsexual that makes you horny?

The smell of Palmer’s Solid Formula Cocoa Butter, because it was my go-to masturbation lube for years lol

47: Most attractive celebrity?

I suck in this department. I don’t have any celeb crushes or anything like that. All-time though, I would say for me personally, it’s Vanity.

48: Do you watch gay/lesbian porn? why/why not?

Not much. Most of the lesbian porn I watch tends to be the short clips I see on tumblr.

49: If a child was born on the occasion of the last time you had sex, how old would that child be right now?

I just had sex a few days ago so, embryo?

50: Has anyone ever posted nude pictures of you online?

My partner, and photographer who has taken some photos of us.

51: What is one thing that NEVER makes you horny?

Scat.

52: Do you have stretch marks? (How do you feel about them? Has anyone ever had a problem with them?)

My knees are the only place I can think of. I don’t think much of anything about them, and no one has ever had an issue with them. That would be weird lol.

53: Do you like giving head? (why/why not)

See #15

54: How do you feel about tattoos on someone you are interested in?

I don’t mind them either way.

55: How would you feel about taking someones virginity?

I don’t know that I would want to be some random person’s first. I’ve never actually taken anyone’s virginity. I think I’d feel okay if the person really wanted me to and we had a relationship of some sort (friendship/acquaintance/partner)

56: Is there any food you would NOT recommend using during a sexual encounter?

Acidic fruits might not be the best choice(s).

57: Is there anything you do on Tumblr that you would not like your significant other to see?

Nope.

58: Do you own any sex toys? (what is it? (how long have you had it?)

See #13

59: Would you give your significant other unrestricted access to your Tumblr for a day?

I could. But why? lol

60: Would you be offended if your significant other suggested you get plastic surgery?

Would probably depend on what for.

61: Would you rather be a pornstar or a prostitute?

Probably prostitute. With porn there are variables like having to maintain an erection for long periods of time, having to cum on demand; as well as the fact that it will likely be accessible to the entire World. Being a prostitute seems a more discreet and little less messy, in theory. But there are safety concerns with prostitution as well. Still, I’ll go with prostitute.

62: Do you watch porn?

I do.

63: How small is too small?

Again, depends on what we’re talking about.

64: Have you ever been called a freak? Why?

I don’t believe so. If I have it wouldn’t have been due to my try-sexual nature, more so than any particular act that I perform or enjoy.

65: Who gave you your last kiss? Did it mean anything?

My partner kissed me on the cheek this morning before she left for work. It meant plenty.

66: Would you switch phones with your significant other for a day?

No, because my family group texts too often for me to be out of the loop, and I also don’t remember anyone’s phone numbers lol.

67: Do you feel comfortable going “commando”?

Yup. I just did so at a sex party my partner and I attended last weekend, and it proved to be the right decision. J

68: Would you have a problem with going down on someone if they hadn’t shaved their pubic hair?

Not at all.

69: If you could give yourself head, would you?

Technically I could, but I’ve yet to try, and I don’t believe I ever will lol.

70: Booty or Boobs?

I guess I have to go with boobs. I do love the booty, as it makes for a great visual while in doggystyle. Plus I really enjoy “hotdogging”/assjobs. And it just feels wonderful having my hands on some booty in general. But with boobs, there’s the nipples, and the areolas. You can mash the boobs together and fuck them, which is one of my favoritest things in life. As is gripping the boobies and simultaneously sucking both nipples. Plus they’re right below the face so they allow for the ability to have my dickhead licked or sucked while tittyfucking and slapping the tits with my dick, plus you’re in great position to conclude with a facial. So yeah, boobs it is.

71: If you had a penis, what would you name it?

I do, and it does not have a name lol.

72: Have you ever been on an official date?

I sure have.

73: Have you ever cheated on someone? (Why?)

No. I’ve never felt compelled to.

74: If you were a stripper, what would your name be?

Male stripper names are so cheesy or skeevy. I’d just let someone else choose for me.

75: Have you ever had sex in your parents bed? (Would you?)

No, and no thank you.

76: How would you react if you found out your parents had sex in your bed?

I’d be beyond shocked because my parents have been separated for decades.

77: What was your reaction the first time you saw a penis/vagina

I cannot recall.

78: If you had a penis/vagina for a day, what are five things you would do?

If I had a vagina for a day I would, try some Ben Wa balls, use a hitachi on my clit, I’d get a large dildo and see how far it could go, I’d attempt to make myself squirt, and I’d try a Sybian.

Source: @maliciousdeliciousunicorn c/o @myegotisticalindulgences

[tatooedlaura-blog]

Eighteenth Christmas

the series is as follows so far:

First … Second … Third … Fourth … Fifth … Fifth Christmas, Part 2 … Sixth … Seventh … Eighth … Ninth … Tenth … Eleventh … Twelfth … Thirteenth … Fourteenth … Fifteenth … Sixteenth … Seventeenth … Eighteenth … Nineteenth … Twentieth … Twenty-first … Twenty-second … Twenty-third

———————–

She’d been forced to let the darkness in, to let it flow around her, settle in her bones and the crevices of her mind, open back up to Mulder theories, ideas, borderline insanity. For the past year, she’d been playing sounding board and Devil’s advocate to him, having deep discussions of survival, surveillance, any and all means of wild theories.

She felt like she was back in the basement with him, only a maddened version of him.

Sometimes, in the dead of night, when they’d be arguing something, he would stop and smile at her, poke her in the ribs until she smiled genuinely back, “kinda forgot it wasn’t 1995 again.”

Understanding completely, “felt more like 1994 to me but to each his own.”

Early in their deal, she’d made it clear that, while she didn’t believe in what he was spouting off, she had promised him something and would hold up her end of the bargain. She made him talk about Samantha and his abduction and in turn, she talked about hers and about William, about their time apart and all their time together. They had managed to work through some very heavy-hanging issues, harbored guilt and resentment buried deep enough to be invisible until 3am as they poured over gun catalogs to see which would be best for their apocalyptic needs.

More than once, she grew tired enough that she began to buy into his spiel and had to excuse herself to pass out on the couch. More than once, she had Mulder convinced he was wrong and he would shake his head, take a walk around the house, doing his checks while he debated the monster in his head.

She spent the year trying to convince him there was something wrong and in all great seriousness, she enjoyed the year more than she cared to admit. They were playing roles once again that were familiar, comfortable. She spent the year getting to know him again, his neuroses much less under control but his mind still sharp, intricate and more beautiful than she remembered the first time around.

Give and take, she didn’t mind coming home anymore, things getting done in her absence. The cable might still be turned off because he couldn’t be sure what kind of signals were sent through it and he may have added a few more deadbolts to the front door, put bars on the windows, but he also kissed her, shared with her, opened up to her again.

But then summer became fall and fall moved to winter and December 1st hit her like a freight train, waking up to a snowy, sunny, frigid day that made her want to cry. 21 days until the world in Mulder’s head ended. 21 days until all their prep work, all their planning became obsolete.

21 days until her plan hit a fucking brick wall.

&&&&&&&&&

December 10th, he asked if Maggie had been packing like he asked her to. He inquired if her brothers were on track with their preparations. He questioned if she’d gotten the anti-biotics, Sulphas, Tylenol and Ibuprophen they needed to survive the next few years or decades. He requested they decorate for Christmas now so they could enjoy it before having to pack away everything so the impending invasion didn’t destroy their holiday memories.

With a deep breath and a smile that should have told him she was cracked inside, they put up the tree, hung the ornaments, decked the halls, unwrapped the candy and presented each other with their gifts.

Mulder opened his box carefully, not smiling but latching his gaze onto the small, perfectly shaped, foil wrapped including waving tag Hershey’s Kiss heavy solid metal ornament. His smile only appeared after Scully leaned forward, kissing him softly on the cheek, “so whatever happens, you’ll always have a kiss from me.”

Eyes glazing for a moment, he captured her lips, “I’ll keep it with me forever.”

Seeing a glimpse of her Mulder once again, she returned his kiss before reaching for her own wrapped box, “do I get to open mine?” After he nodded, she unwrapped clear glass spirals, six in all, each a different color of the rainbow, spinning delicately on invisible thread. Taking in a breath, “they’re beautiful, Mulder.”

Still clutching his kiss in one hand, he picked up the red spiral in his other, “wanted to have as much color in the world as we could.”

Moving to hang them before coming back to settle on his lap, “I love them. Thank you.”

“I love your kiss, too.” Dropping it in his shirt pocket, “I’m going to store this one with me for awhile.”

&&&&&&&&&&

By the 15th, Mulder was in full planning mode, going over checklists and inspecting his self-installed barbed wire fencing around the perimeter of the property; checking the manual water pump on the well, tightening screws on the bars of the windows, shifting canned goods to make room for more that would be arriving the next day.

Scully, for her part, feigned going to work for a few hours so she could sit in her car and sob uncontrollably just down the road.

Maggie, her love for her Fox immeasurable, finally relented to pack things up, come to the house and ride out the day of doom with her daughter and wished for son-in-law. It had taken a very long time for Scully to convince her that, even though she didn’t believe in this possible future, that Mulder did and they needed to deceive him in order to help him, to fix him once they got him past December 21st.

There were many, many discussions and arguments, heated ones, about this in private between mother and daughter but in the end, Maggie showed up with two suitcases, several laundry baskets filled with food, her most precious memories and photo albums and her late husband’s shot gun, rifle and three pistols, her vehicle bearing her weight in ammunition for them all.

Both Mulder and Scully eyed her collection and Maggie shook her head, “Dana’s father didn’t exactly have a trust in humanity either.”

&&&&&&&&&&

On the 19th, Mulder was pacing, caught in a loop of checking on things, double checking on things, mentioning the same things over and over until Maggie had to excuse herself, seeing him like this breaking her heart. Disappearing to the guest room for the night, she heard Scully talking quietly to him, trying to get him to sit still for five minutes, get more than the two hours of sleep a night he’d been burning through for the last two months.

Finally, Scully simply took his hand, turned out the lights and led him upstairs, closing their bedroom door behind her, twisting the simply lock before leading him to the edge of the bed. Sitting him on the comforter, she scooted between his knees, resting elbows on shoulders, clasping hands behind head, “I need you to stop for tonight, okay? You need a good night’s sleep. You need to shut your eyes and drift away for me. Can you do that?”

“But, Scully …”

Shutting him up with her lips briefly on his before meeting his forehead in their commonplace gesture of devoted adoration, “one night, Mulder. One last night in our bed, safe from the world. Forget everything but us, in the dark.” Running a finger over his temple, “remember how good we are in the dark, Mulder? How much you love me in the dark?”

Nodding against her, he then pulled away, “you will never have any idea just how much I love you.”

Finally, after all this time, a small amount of panic at the coming possible future entered her soul, wiggled into her brain, squeezed her heart and lungs and gasping from the force of it, she mashed her mouth against his, teeth knocking together, lips pinched between. There wasn’t time for slow reveals and caressing words; instead, they came together swiftly and in silence, the knowledge of Maggie across the hall keeping them quiet, keeping their sighs of fear and release muted.

They didn’t sleep much that night anyway, alternating instead between holding, joining, drifting and a rare, instant unconscious moment or two before waking to make sure the other was still there, still alive, still touching and breathing.

&&&&&&&&

Mulder moved them to the basement the next morning, declaring that December 21 would begin on the other side of the world in a few short hours and he wanted to be ready when it did. Maggie pursed her lips and followed the pair down, reluctant to pull the door shut behind her, beginning to feel that claustrophobic fear her daughter had experienced the night before. The click of the catch and the finality of shutting vibrated through her hand and she fought the panic clawing up her throat.

Fox was wrong, wasn’t he?

Two deep breaths later, she was in her futon chair in the corner, Dana’n’Fox on the pullout couch, settled in for a day of waiting.

They passed the time quietly, Mulder pacing, unpacking, rearranging while Maggie and Scully played cards, napped, strained to listen to the outside world above them but heard nothing until finally, Maggie begged off, her head pounding from the stress of the room, the stress of remaining silent in her opinions and the stress of the tiny nugget of worry that grew exponentially as time dragged on, feigning sleep on her chair.

December 21st arrived in Australia, then slowly worked its way around the world, Mulder glued to his short-wave radio, waiting for chaos, nightmares, the invasion that he knew was coming.

China, Russia, Poland, Egypt, Spain, England, Greenland … nothing.

She watched him break into a sweat, standing at the top of the stairs, listening through the locked door for sounds of the world ending.

It came and went, passing quietly by on its way Colorado, California, Hawaii, Alaska …

&&&&&&&&

The long day dragged as the three of them held their spots, eating prepared food leftover from the refrigerator upstairs, cold sandwiches and colder milk. Napping, reading, talking …

And then December 21st ended with a whimper instead of a bang, moving past silently in the dark, December 22nd in its wake …

[nofomoartworld]

Art F City: This Week’s Must-See Art Events: Propaganda for the Digital Age

Today and tomorrow New Yorkers will be saddled by this terrible Northeaster storm, but that shouldn’t stop you from attending Hannah Cole’s talk on artist taxes today or Judith Bernstein’s talk and book launch dubbed dicks of death tomorrow. They’re too important to miss. By Wednesday art lovers will be able to head to the Lodge for an opening of John Wellington’s dystopian history paintings, and on Thursday to the New York City Opera to see electronic artist Dan Deacon’s “America” set to ballet. We’re particularly looking forward to seeing the ballet given Deacon’s connection to the blog. He’s a Baltimore resident and a long time muse for the blog.

By the time the weekend sets in, it’ll be all talks moderated by Art F City’s Paddy Johnson. On Saturday she’ll be discussing how the Nevada Test Site has influenced the paintings of Eric LoPresti with Eric LoPresti. Sunday, she’ll be discussing the evolving roll of storytelling in American culture with Jack Early and friends.

All of which is to say there’s plenty to see and do this week. So let’s not delay. Put these dates in your calendar and plan to compare notes later on!

M

T

W

T

F

S

S

Mon

SVA Room 101C

133/141 West 21st Street New York, NY 6:30 p.m. - 8:00 p.m.Website

Art, Technology, Ecology: A Talk by Artist Frank Gillette

Frank Gillette is known as both a pioneer of experimental video work and eco-conscious art practice. That might sound like an unlikely combo, but that’s part of why this promises to be an interesting talk. Gillette’s multi-channel video installations are informed by everything from cybernetic theory to observations of natural phenomenon, and his processes involve experiments with feedback and closed-circuit loops.

NYSRP

20 Jay St, Ste. M10 7:00 p.m.-9:00 p.m.Website

Hannah Cole

Art F City and the New York Studio Residency Program (NYSRP) present Taxes for Artists, a talk by accountant, artist and AFC Columnist Hannah Cole. Cole is a tax expert who specializes in working with creative businesses and artists. In this talk, she’s going to make sure you get every deduction you’ve never thought about.

Tue

Swiss Institute

102 Franklin St New York, NY 7:00 p.m.Website

Book Launch | Judith Bernstein: Dicks of Death

Judith Bernstein has been drawing dicks for more than half a century, because, in her own words, “men may own it in a bodily sense, but men don’t own the image!”

An artist after our own hearts, indeed. On the event of her publication launch, she’ll be joined in discussion by Hyperallergic co-editor Thomas Micchelli, who’s also drawn and painted his fair share of anatomy.

MoMA

11 West 53rd Street New York, NY 8:00 p.m. Website

Alexandra Bachzetsis’s "Massacre: Variations on a Theme"

This performance commission from MoMA involves dancers and pianists and “positions the female body as a technological form caught between animism and automatism…”

I’m not familiar with Alexandra Bachzetsis’s work, but this sounds promising. The piece will be installed as a video during museum hours, but there will be live performances starting Tuesday. If you can’t catch the opening night, there are a few other chances to see it live:

Wednesday, January 25, 8:00 p.m. Friday, January 27, 10:00 p.m. Saturday, January 28, 8:00 p.m.

Wed

Gladstone 64

130 East 64th Street New York, NY 6:00 p.m. - 8:00 p.m. Website

Andro Wekua: A Dog's Fidelity

I’m not entirely sure what to expect from Andro Wekua’s latest installation at Gladstone 64. The description begins with a poem about dogs’ memories, promises seascapes and portraits that reference icons, and paintings inspired by video, collage, and sculpture. But if this painting that looks like a still from a parking garage surveillance camera is any indication, it should be good and strange.

The Lodge Gallery

131 Chrystie St. New York, NY 7:00 p.m. - 9:00 p.m.Website

John Wellington: TEMPLE TOMB FORTRESS RUIN

John Wellington’s paintings are delightfully kitschy-dystopian—mashing up history painting, mythology, militarism, and pop-culture. A year ago, I would’ve likened his work to covers for really weird pulp sci-fi paperbacks. Today, I’m a little concerned these are eerily prescient of the world those creepy dancing “Freedom Kids” from Florida are going to inherit as adults.

Thu

Sean Kelly Gallery

475 Tenth Avenue New York, NY 6:00 p.m. - 8:00 p.m.Website

James Casebere: Emotional Architecture

Photographer James Casebere created this series by painstakingly recreating models of Luis Barragán buildings. These tiny doll-house-like modernist masterpieces were then photographed, capturing the Mexican architect’s famously considered sense of light and color while adding an otherworldly sense of materiality and scale. These are so, so lovely and inviting.

David H Koch Theater

20 Lincoln Center Plaza New York, NY 7:30 p.m.Website

The Times Are Racing (World Premiere)

Dan Deacon’s album America (2012) feels so urgent and timely nearly 5 years later it’s crazy. The music is anthemic but uncertain, frenetic and driving. When it first came out, it felt like the soundtrack to American life post-Occupy. Deacon described the album as “inspired by my frustration, fear and anger towards the country and world I live in and am a part of.”

Now, the New York City Ballet is inaugurating a new show set to America, choreographed by Justin Peck. If the gorgeous promo video they shot in the subway is any indication, they’ve succeeded in capturing that energy. We can’t wait to see this.

Fri

Bridget Donahue

99 Bowery New York, NY 12:00 p.m. - 6:00 p.m.Website

Lynn Hershman Leeson: Remote Controls

We’re looking forward to American artist and filmmaker Lynn Hershman Leeson latest solo show at Bridget Donahue. Aside from being a trailblazer in the field of new media and feminism, she’s spent a lifetime exploring issues of voyeurism and surveillance—issues that couldn’t be more relevant today.

This show will include an interactive video from 1979-82, a sexual fantasy video disc from 1984 and a two channel synchronized installation inside a dollhouse (1993-2011).

Sat

MoCADA

80 Hanson Pl Brooklyn, New York 12:00 p.m. - 7:00 p.m.Website

Brown Paper Zine & Small Press Fair

3 Dot Zine, founded by artist Devin N Morris, is hosting a weekend-long zine fest at the Museum of Contemporary African Diasporan Arts. The festival grew out of Morris’s realization that POC tend to be underrepresented in DIY publishing and zine culture.

Beyond vendors, the festival features programming such as workshops and screenings on Saturday and Sunday.

Elizabeth Houston

190 Orchard Street 2 p.m.Website

Eric LoPresti and Paddy Johnson in Conversation

IMG MGMT artist Eric LoPresti and Art F City’s own Paddy Johnson will discuss LoPresti’s recent work. LoPresti’s essay focused on massive scale land art and the Nevada Test Site, and his art work similarly focuses on the Nevada test site landscape and flora and fauna.

Sun

The Wythe Hotel

80 Wythe Ave 3:00 p.m.

Post-truth Storytelling: The Personal Narrative in the Digital Age

Time for a bit of face to face talk, as an antidote to the never-ending social media wars.

This talk, which is lead by Jack Early and moderated by Art F City’s own Paddy Johnson, will include Richard Agerbeek and Leja Kress, Co Founders of SwedenUnlimited, Jacob Bernstein, Director of “Everything is Copy” and other luminaries. Together they will focus on how the democratization of media has affected storytelling. What narratives do we chose to believe? Which ones tells us who we are and who we want to become and which are corrosive falsehoods that erode our sense of wellbeing?  How do we navigate fact and fiction in this new world?

Unlike the usual food-free talks we’re all used to in the art world, this one will include fries and drinks. And those are all the ingredients necessary to really connect in this world!

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