#although it's without andy too

[last-of-the-independents]

Rather, this post intended for Sly's fans, lol. But if you ever wanted to see russian official DVD edition of Cobra and the book by Paula Gosling in Russian language - you got it. @garak-pussy-indulgence, this post is dedicated to you <3

[nerdyqueerr]

TRAGIC: no one paid any attention to local butch while it made delicious dinner and now it's lonely

[sweetbunpura]

Cruise of a Lifetime Ch. 4

Kalim would like to treat NRC to a cruise for summer break... he may have forgotten to tell everyone WHO else was sharing the ship with them...

Tie into: Rescue from RSA

Ch.1 - Ch.2 - Ch. 3

WC: 975

After unpacking their luggage, the Ramshackle group departed for the dining room as the ship began to depart from port. Entering the room, Yuu could see various students from NRC and RSA eating, although there was still a very clear divide between the schools. 

“I might take back what I said about this being a good month.” She said as Rollo handed her a plate.

“It’s bound to happen.” The man states factly. “They have a history, after all.”

“Mm-hmm.” Yuu glanced over to where Fellow and Gidel were. “Take what you can eat.”

Fellow tsk’d and flicked his tail as he added a piece of baked chicken to Gidel’s plate. The man jerks his head towards Grim, who reaches for the tongs of a nearby food pan despite his plate already stacked high.

“Grim.” Yuu warns, causing the direbeast to freeze and look at her. “Take what you can eat.”

Grim puts the utensils back and steps away timidly. A chuckle sounds behind her and Rollo, causing them to direct their attention to the man standing there.

“Didn’t mean to alert ya, love.” Hatley tips his hat with a mysterious smile. “Just thought it was humorous is all.”

Rollo covers his mouth with his handkerchief before his face can twist into a scowl. 

“Hey, Hatley.” Yuu greets him calmly. “Sorry if we’re in your way.”

“No, no, not at all.” Hatley waves his hand. “Just grabbin’ something for Andy. Your room nice?”

“Very. Yours?”

“I’m bunked with Andy, so I’ll let you decide that yourself.” The vice leader sighs as Yuu laughs at the image. “Laughin’ at my misery, are we?”

“Yeah.” 

“Too cruel, Love.” Hatley glanced at the murderous look Rollo was giving him. “Well, I just stopped by for a chat. Lemme get goin’.” He departed with a wave and walked off.

“Stop that.” Yuu voiced once the vice leader was out of earshot.

“I didn’t say anything.” Rollo defended and turned back towards the array of food. “I just... he’s aggravating.”

“You say that about everyone.”

“Am I wrong in doing so?” He eyes the food with a raised eyebrow. “Is any of this good?”

“Grilled salmon.” Yuu voices as she reaches to put it on her plate. “And...” She trailed off as she walked down the line.

Rollo mentally sighs and adds whatever pasta is on the menu to his plate followed by the grilled salmon Yuu had just put on her plate. Once they had selected what they wanted, they joined the others at the table to see Grim picking clean the bones of whatever he had eaten.

“It is simply astounding how much he can pack away.” Skully said as he observed the direbeast.

“Him.” Rollo pointed at the pair across the table with his knife. “And them.”

Fellow blinked out of his food stupor as he placed his fork down and wiped his mouth clean. His plate, as well as Gidel’s, was clean.

“I was merely appreciating the quality of food.” Fellow defended as he eyed Rollo with a smirk on his face. “At least I EAT the food and don’t pick at it.”

“I do not pick at it.”

“Sorry, meant to say “Picky eater.”

“You-”

“Do not.” Yuu drank her water and stared at the two of them. “This is a vacation, not a fight. I don’t want any of you causing any trouble.”

“Of course.”

“Fine, fine.” Fellow flicked his tail and drank the rest of his soda. “Actually, I got a dare for you, Ringleader.”

“....Should I be concerned given that it is coming from you after all.” Rollo stares at him as he finishes his salmon.

“Nah, nah. I wanna see how long you last without being glued to Beastmaster Homura’s side.”

Rollo blinks. “Excuse me?”

“You two are ALWAYS together.” Fellow explains. “She hardly has any time to herself-”

“Fellow.” Yuu warned.

“-And it’s about time you make new friends!”

“...I’m making friends.” Rollo tried to defend himself.

“Regardless, my point stands. So, for the next week outside of returning to the room and us eating, you need to be on your own and away from Beastmaster.”

“....” Rollo narrowed his eyes. “And if I win?”

“....I’ll clean the bathrooms with no complaining for a week.”

“Three weeks.”

“A week and a half.”

“Two weeks.”

“Deal-”

“Hold on.” Yuu interrupted them before they could shake hands. “What happens if he can’t do it?”

“....” Fellow smirked. “He has to wear a goat onesie and post it to Magicam.”

Rollo’s immediately turned red and he glared daggers at the snickering fox beastman. “Not on your life nor in a thousand years will you get me to wear that.”

“Then you better win.” He held his hand out. “Shake on it?”

“.....” Rollo shook his hand and Yuu let out a sigh before getting up from the table.

“I’ll leave you boys to explore the rest of the ship.” She gave Rollo a kiss on his cheek as she departed. “We’ll meet back up at six for dinner!”

“Gideon and I are going to check the arcade.” Gidel took off out of the dining room while Fellow put their plates away and followed after him.

“I’m gonna go find Ace and Deuce!” Grim jumped from the table.

“You are more than welcome to join Sebek and I if you wish, Master Rollo.” Skully smiled as he extended his invitation, which Rollo rejected with a shake of his head. “Alright. I’ll see you at dinner then.” He soon departed and left the vice leader of Ramshackle at the table.

Rollo sighed and got up to put away his own plate only to pause as a shadow was suddenly cast over him. He didn’t dare look behind him as he spotted the horns attached to said shadow.

“Flamme. Would you like to accompany me in exploring the vessel?” 

[smoft-demons]

Hey, I've been reading your post for a while now andi absolutely love them. Before I got into OM I was already a big D&D person and love fantesty-romance novels. Although, that's besides the point. I was genuinely scared to ask this until I saw your headcanons, there so wholesome<3

But I was wondering if you could do a brothers + the others react to MC getting there period? I was planning on doing it on my own page but I'm a bit scared to publish my own stuff. Although, thank you if you do.

-H.M

Yeah, sure! As I’m sure you’ve noticed, I love writing all the comfort and fluff prompts. It’s like catnip to me lmao

This is gonna be pretty long, so I’m only gonna do the brothers.

Thanks for requesting!! I hope you like it :)

_______

MC is on their period

_______

You’ve been living in the House of Lamentation for a while now. You are, at this point, thoroughly and inextricably part of the family.

As a member of their family, your demons have no problem with helping you out. They can’t help but fawn over you a bit, as well—this wasn’t a familiar problem to them before meeting you, as none of them menstruate. Plus, any human condition of yours that highlights vulnerability and pain on your part makes them all get a tad protective.

In any case, they make sure to be helpful!

_______

Lucifer: responsibility -> rest

With your permission, Lucifer notes your cycle on the calendar he keeps on the kitchen wall. Tactfully, of course. It’s just a little red X in the corner of the box that marks the day you start until the day it ends. It ensures no one in the house forgets to be extra nice to you on those days. Plus, it serves as a way to remind you, in case it sneaks up on you.

In the week leading up to it, he checks up on your stock of human world products (and devildom ones too) for it. Painkillers, chocolate, tea, hygiene products, a heating pad, everything. If you’re running low, he will either take you to get more or take care of it himself, depending on how you’re feeling.

If you’re irregular, he takes extra care with tracking your cycle. Having records is important!

He takes you off the chore rotation while you’re bleeding. He wants you to rest. He will not make you expend your energy on chores while you’re in pain.

If you WANT to take some chores though, he understands and will let you, as long as you don’t make yourself suffer unnecessarily. He understands that some people cope worse with stress, illness, and/or pain when their routine is interrupted and they have no task to distract themself with. He would know! He’s one of them! So if you are too, he won’t force you to give up your tasks.

He does very strictly instruct you not to push yourself, however. You are to let him know immediately if you need to stop, so he or one of his brothers can help you out.

If you want somewhere quiet to hide, he’s got you. His study is a great spot for that! He won’t let anyone else in.

His room is another great spot for that, if you want a softer surface and dimmer lighting. You’re allowed to be in there without him if that ends up working out best (and he hopes you understand the level of trust in you he’s displaying by allowing that), but he has no problem with bringing his work out of the study and into his room if you want his company.

If he’s not on a time crunch, he won’t bother bringing any work with him though. Unless he has reason to expect you to feel guilty for taking up his time, in which case he will bring some and finish it in the room with you and then tell you he’s done for the day.

You end up lying on his bed with him, contorted in whatever weird position makes your cramps hurt the least. It’s the middle of the day, but for once Lucifer doesn’t seem to mind. He’s just lying next to you with his hand splayed over your uterus or lower back, applying light pressure and warmth to help the pain go away. Quietly talking to you about stuff that doesn’t matter.

There’s no concern for productivity. Nor for terrorizing his brothers into order. It seems the key for making Lucifer take a day to just relax is to request his company while you’re in pain.

See, Lucifer’s driving force is how much he loves his family. He will go to ANY lengths to keep them safe and happy. It’s his main priority. You’re part of his family now. You’re the youngest, even… and you’re in pain. So, he’s okay with pushing off the work Diavolo gives him for a day. For you, it’s worth it.

There’s no paperwork in any realm that he would prioritize over comforting you when you’re in pain. He hopes you feel all the love in that sentiment.

You know how huge a declaration that action is, because there is NO other way to get Lucifer to voluntarily lie around in the middle of the day.

_______

Mammon: devotion -> generosity

Mammon was the first one you went to for help during your very first period in the Devildom.

After a short, frantic conversation about what happened to you, why, and how you normally deal with this, he set you up in his room with some towels, a spare set of his own comfortably worn in clothes, and a movie as he rushed out to find some Devildom substitute for the hygiene products you’re used to. Just, SOMETHING to absorb the blood in the meantime before he can get you products from the human world!

He would have gone to the human world immediately, but he’s not allowed and he doesn’t have time to talk Lucifer into letting him up there yet!! You have NOTHING to work with right now, he’s gotta figure something out ASAP!

He didn’t even think about the amount of money he’s willing to spend, or how else he could be using it. He may not have been willing to tell you how much he cares for you at that point, but he has always come through for you when it matters. Even in the early days.

You find yourself contemplating Mammon’s contrasting demeanour while he’s out. This isn’t the first demonstration of his responsible mode that you’ve seen. It’s fascinating, the way he acts so careless and tsundere until someone needs him—at which point he drops that image like it’s nothing, revealing the softhearted and protective big brother he really is.

In those moments, you can see in his personality that he helped raise 5 little brothers (and one Lilith, though you don’t learn about her until later) and is actually pretty damn good at it. It’s clear that he loves you more than he’s willing to admit in those rare moments, when showing it genuinely matters.

Anyway. He came home with an assortment of items for you. No medicine yet because he doesn’t trust that Devildom painkillers won’t harm you, but he brought a BUNCH of snacks, and a collection of things that can be used to absorb the blood for now, until he can get Lucifer to let him go get the stuff you normally use from the human world. You can take your pick.

He even commissioned an enchanter to make you a custom heating pad, because he doesn’t trust the ones meant for demons to not burn your skin. He didn’t think about the price. Frankly, he doesn’t care. Maybe he’ll remember to complain about it to save face later. Maybe.

His main concern—making sure you’re okay—left no room to think of that in that moment. He waves off your concern about bloodstains on the stuff he lent you before he went out. Being reassuring in his usual irreverent way, saying something about how he’s a demon, and demons don’t tend to be squeamish about blood. Hell if he cares, he says.

While you’re in the bathroom washing up and dealing with the bleeding (with a SECOND set of Mammon’s worn-in, comfy clothes that he put in your hands before shoving you into the bathroom, not giving you a second to refuse), Mammon is texting Lucifer to find a way to get you proper period supplies from the human world.

When you come back to him, he tells you that you’ll have what you need before you go to bed, but in the meantime you should sit, because he’s putting on another movie.

He watches you shift around uncomfortably over the next few minutes. Cramps, you know. You’re not exactly comfortable sitting the way you are. Without a word, he pulls you to lie down with your head resting on his leg. He’s looking away from you, indistinctly mumbling something about “so lucky I’m lookin’ after ya” and “what would ya do without the great Mammon” and “MY human, damn it” as he carefully rubs tension out of your back.

“What was that?” You ask him.

“Shut up an’ watch the damn movie!” He splutters.

You stay like that until Lucifer shows up with your requested items. Pads, tampons, a menstrual cup, painkillers, whatever it is you asked for.

Later that night, as Mammon persists in rubbing your back as another movie plays, you find that your trust in him is stronger than it has ever been before. You understand exactly why Mammon is the best demon to be in charge of your well-being. Lucifer chose him for a reason, and it’s impossible to miss. Mammon is so damn caring under the tsundere façade.

You feel so loved. You ARE so loved. The pain fades away under the warmth of his hands. His lap makes a good pillow, and Mammon makes a great guardian.

(Every month after this, he leaves his door open for you in case you want a distraction from the pain. He’s ready with snacks and a movie. He’ll happily do this for you every time.)

_______

Levi: passion -> gentleness

Whatever it is that Levi notices first—be it the blood, the worse mood, the regular time spent with Mammon every month—he freaks out. He’s like “AAAAWTF WHY ARE YOU BLEEDING ARE YOU DYING???” Or like “oh noooo are you mad at me why are you randomly sad do you hate me now??” Or like “why can’t you reschedule with Mammon and do this time limited event with me, do you not wanna play with me anymore???”

Either way, bro is suffering.

Eventually, either you or one of his older brothers explains to him, and he feels bad. He didn’t mean to stress you out worse! Also, periods are real?? He thought it was just some creative plot point in the occasional anime! That’s crazy, why are humans built like that??

Anyway. Levi’s nothing if not passionate, and he’s gonna turn some of that passion towards finding ways to make you more comfortable.

He will find a way to order all the human world snacks you crave while you’re bleeding. He will be on the lookout for gifts, like games and merch and manga you’d want. He stockpiles them so he always has something ready to cheer you up when you need that.

He will even do his best to redirect the envy he feels towards Mammon and his established routine of movies and snacks in his room with you lying in his lap and getting free back rubs on the first day of your period each month. He wants that to be him, damn it! But he’s not gonna disrupt that for you.

He WILL claim hanging out with you on your day 2 though, AND will fill in every time if Mammon’s not available. The only thing that can beat out his shyness at the idea of having you using his lap as a pillow is the raging envy at knowing MAMMON gets to have that every month!

(Eventually, once you figure out that Levi wants to be invited so bad, you just invite him. It’s not like you don’t want him there! He’s very happy to sit next to you with your legs in his lap while he ignores Mammon’s stupid movie and plays a game on his phone. It’s nice to have two demon pillows. This one’s got built-in cooling!)

Levi understands not wanting to deal with lights and noise and craziness when you’re in pain. He will prevent any of his brothers from bringing any of that around you with all the determination and passion he brings to everything he cares about.

He is remarkably gentle, for someone who is usually so excitable. So considerate! You can see in the way he forces everyone to only argue over text, in the gentle movement of cool, nimble hands over sore calves and hips and ankles, in the presentation of snacks and gifts determinedly brought to you from the human world, how much he cares about you. He loves you, he loves you, he loves you.

_______

Satan: research -> comfort

The first order of business for nerd boy here is, of course, research. He is gathering information from all his relevant contacts—every human sorcerer and witch he knows, every demon with a pact-bonded menstruating human they care about AND the aforementioned human, every healer, medical researcher, librarian…

Yeah, he’s gonna end up knowing more about it than you do.

He comes back home after a few days, mumbling about human endocrine systems and nutrition and medical malpractice of menstruating patients and the mechanics of blood production and every phase of a menstrual cycle and how pain works on a chemical level. He’s got notebooks and everything. He’s got the whole history of menstruation since the beginning of humanity summarized in one of those notebooks.

… Maybe it’s a bit overkill. But you know how he gets when he’s curious, especially about something that hurts you! He’s gotta know everything!

So now he’s infodumping to you about every symptom you mention. If you’re the sort of person who finds that interesting and helpful, perfect! If you’re not… well, he won’t be offended if you get mad at him for effectively mansplaining your own body to you. Demon-splaining? Whatever, either way he will take that correction with grace and only tell you information you directly ask for. He’s learned enough about menstruation to be very sympathetic and patient while you’re in the middle of it. It seems awful to him, and he’s not about to make it worse!

He’s wise enough to know that he should ask before ACTING on any of that information though. He won’t try to optimize your nutrition or your painkillers or anything unless you ask him to. He knows that would be too far. He’s not prideful enough to override you like that, he’s not Lucifer.

If you get really angry when you bleed, he’s got you! He understands, he encourages you to yell and rant in front of him all you want. Throw around some destructive spellwork or just break stuff if you need to, he’s got a room for that. It’s all good!

Satan is so good with practical comfort. He’s big on venting for your health and sanity. He knows what buttons not to push, they’re obvious to him as wrath incarnate.

Of course, he’ll also give you hugs and drive off his crazy brothers if you need peace. He’ll bring you to the cats when you get sick of people. He’ll find you any answer you need. If your cycle is irregular or in any way atypical, there’s no better demon to have searching for answers for you—and he’d NEVER let no medical malpractice happen to you. Doctors are GOING to take you seriously, damn it!

To him, there’s no such thing as too much hassle to help someone he loves so much as he loves you.

_______

Asmo: luxury -> selflessness

As the Avatar of Lust, there’s no way Asmo doesn’t know the basics of how menstrual cycles work. No way. Even if demons don’t get them, it’s relevant to his whole domain.

Asmo’s got you. He’s gonna spoil the hell out of you. Massages with fancy oils, hot baths with magic muscle relaxant products added, masks to prevent any skin issues from fluctuating hormones, everything he can think of.

If anyone even tries to make you do anything you don’t want to, he will destroy them. This is a time for rest, he insists!

He relishes any opportunity to relax with you, have a self-care day, just chill and recharge together… but he’s prioritizing you. You get to see the rare responsible Asmo during this time! If you have non-negotiable responsibilities, he’s helping you. He wants you to get done faster!

He’s actually got a pretty great strategic mind when he’s incentivized to use it! He’s so efficient! Only because he wants you to be in his room relaxing as fast as possible, but it’s totally there!

At the end of it all, it’s completely possible that he forgets about spoiling himself too, just because he got so focused on trying to take as much of your pain away as possible. It’s wild that he doesn’t think he has any capacity for selflessness. Good thing you know better.

_______

Beel: perceptiveness -> caring

Beel smells the blood. Immediately. At first he’s concerned but minds his own business, trusting that Mammon’s taking care of you. But after you’ve pacted with him? Not anymore.

Beel becomes your warning system. He will notify you as soon as the hormonal shift starts to happen. Days before you even start bleeding.

You know it’s because he cares, and that he can’t avoid noticing the change in your scent whether he wants to or not. You choose not to think it’s weird.

He gets worried once he learns about what happens to you every month. His first priority is making sure he doesn’t eat everything that’s high in iron, folic acid, vitamin C and D, and omega-3s. All very good for you when you’re on your period. He makes sure that stuff remains available to you.

He invites you to exercise with him too, because he heard that can be helpful. He won’t STOP you from lifting if that’s what you want to do, but HE is choosing to focus on stretching and moderate cardio for now (stuff that should be more helpful for you) and if you want to join him, well… that’s what he’s doing. What do you mean he changed it on purpose? He just felt like yoga and a nice jog today! Don’t think about it too hard!

Beel is actually the best one to go to for massages. Sure, Asmo knows what feels good and he’s phenomenal at that. True. But Beel is the one who understands every muscle and tendon in a body, so if you want a full, functional reset, in which all the tension and soreness in you gets methodically, optimally pressed out, you go to Beel. It might not feel quite as nice—in fact it might hurt a fair bit—but it’ll be so effective. You will have no pain at all after. Plus, he’ll teach you stretches to prevent some of that tension coming back later, too. He’s so helpful.

_______

Belphie: laziness -> service

We all know Belphie is the number one advocate for rest. He will encourage you to sleep through as much of it as possible. Why would you want to be awake to experience pain? Screw that. He will actively keep you asleep as long as possible—unless you tell him in advance that there has to be limits so you don’t bleed on everything you’re touching. Even so, he doesn’t quite see the problem. He’s a demon, he’s not squeamish about blood. What biohazard?

But no, he’ll respect that. If he’s a lil shit about it, all you have to do is pull the “remember that time you killed me” card and he’ll do whatever you want lol

In the biggest twist of irony since The Incident, Belphie actually finds himself serving as your alarm clock. It has to be him, you see, because he insists on sleeping next to you. He wants to be there to ensure you sleep through the night, and don’t ever get woken up by cramps. So it’s gotta be him to wake you up when it’s absolutely necessary. Because you see, he does not trust anyone else to understand what’s absolutely necessary. Only someone who loves sleep as much as him gets it, he insists.

Belphie is nothing if not lazy. Obviously. But… he’s actually voluntarily doing work on your behalf?? He’s concealing bloodstains on your sheets from you so you don’t feel uncomfortable, and washing them for you. He isn’t even telling you about that, so he isn’t even getting any thanks for it! How very kind and un-demonic of him!

(Of course, he’s mostly doing it because he doesn’t want you to feel embarrassed and stop sleeping next to him while you’re on your period. He’s got selfish reasons. But… really, it’s not very selfish at all when you look at how that benefits you too. How could he be so surprised to hear that you think he can be kind and sweet when he wants to be? How’s he not seeing it??)

He may deny that he’s actually a sweetie, but you know the truth. When sloth incarnate is voluntarily doing secret chores for you, you KNOW he loves you. It might as well be spilling out of his soul, it’s so undeniable.

_______

You’re bleeding. It’s miserable. No one likes their period. It’s made much more bearable for you, however, now that you have this ridiculous family falling over themselves to make your life easier. All the pain, all the hormonal fuckery, all the bullshit your body puts you through is… well, actually quite tolerable when you’re loved this much.

[winningmymind]

(wholesome twinyard, Andrew brotherly jealous)

Bee can tell that Andrew's upset. He hasn't touched his hot cocoa, even when she added jumbo marshmallows and whipped cream with chocolate syrup drizzle to sweeten his increasingly bitter mood. Whatever happened to him earlier today, concerned Andrew enough to text Bee for an emergency session.

One without Aaron involved. Although it seems Aaron is the cause for Andrew needing to speak to her immediately in private.

"Are you feeling alright, Andrew?" Bee's voice is professional with a hint of sincerity that Andrew respects and is endeared to.

"No."

His arms are crossed and his lips are the closest they've ever been to a pout. Bee thinks this is the most child-like Andrew's looked since she's known him and if Neil were here, they'd both agree that the Foxes goalie appears rather cute at current.

"Why aren't you alright, Andrew?"

It takes ten solid minutes of silence before Bee's given an answer.

"Some guy in the cafeteria called Aaron his brother." Andrew sounds borderline disdainful at the recollection.

Bee's eyebrows shoot up at the tone and her hand scribbles on a blank notepad page.

"Some guy? Do you know his name?"

"Andy Mathers. Senior. Pre-med. Hockey team. Tall. Filthy rich. Fratboy." Andrew curtly rattles off, really showcasing his criminal justice major skills.

"I see you've done your research." Bee curves her lips into a fond smile. She digs a little deeper at the reveal. "This Andy is in a fraternity, you said?"

"Wants Aaron to exclusively join his cult of uppity scholars. Something about med and pre-med students with high GPAs getting connections and resources to help them in fancy pants doctor land. Blah blah blah. Boring."

Andrew's stellar memory can't stop replaying how it all went down in the cafeteria a few short hours ago. The Monsters met up for lunch. Aaron arrived at the table last with this damn Andy (short for Andrew as well, gross) following behind him like a devoted puppy.

Andy kept praising Aaron for passing an infamously difficult exam from an equally vile professor with flying colors and how he's just the man they've been looking for to represent their frat's ethics and image. Started mentioning how if Aaron pledged, he could be the "little brother" to Andy's "big brother", and they'd have this unbreakable forever bond that no one would understand but them. Planned to take Aaron under his wing and care for him just like family.

"Clearly Andy bothers you a great deal," Bee's voice pauses the loop in Andrew's traitorous brain. "Why does Andy potentially forming an academic relationship with Aaron bother you?"

Andrew narrows his eyes. If it weren't Bee he was directly looking at and if Bee wasn't comfortable around him, one would think his visage promised violence.

"Aaron doesn't need anymore brothers. He has me. Just me." Andrew states matter of fact.

"Oh. Hmm. I see."

Bee observes Andrew finally pop a marshmallow into his mouth. By now the hot cocoa's gone lukewarm and the whipped cream looks less glamorous. She runs through some ideas in her head for Andrew to process this situation better. This is a first that Andrew is claiming Aaron as his brother only and no one else's. A far cry from calling Aaron, along with the rest of the Monsters, as his in a possessive manner.

He obviously values the title Aaron has as his brother and identical twin, maybe demands the same in return, and in Bee's opinion Andrew most likely feels insulted that an outsider thinks they can walk in uninvited to forge a cherry picked siblingship.

"Even if it's fraternity brothers? In spirit? That's no good?"

Andrew shakes his head. "Andy and whoever the fuck else doesn't meet the requirements."

"Requirements? Care to explain?"

Andrew lists off his fingers.

"We share the same blood, same pathetic birth giver, and same annoying cousin. If your last name isn't Minyard, it won't ever count. Makes it pointless to be brothers. Bonus that we share the same face too."

"Is that so?"

"Yes."

"No room for exceptions?"

"None."

"Tell me, Andrew. Have you ever felt jealousy?"

He grows awfully quiet. Which isn't abnormal for him. She can tell he's contemplating.

"I believe you're experiencing that right now."

Andrew slightly tilts his head.

"Explain."

"Well, you called for an emergency session. You expressed that you don't like the idea of Andy gaining Aaron's affection as a frat brother. You made up excuses to reject Andy on Aaron's unknowing behalf."

Bee let's her words settle in before picking back up at Andrew's insistent, "Keep talking."

"At any point when you first saw Aaron and Andy together, did Aaron ever give off signs that he is seriously considering Andy's offer? To become brothers in a sense? Any open body language or words humoring Andy even?"

Andrew doesn't speak for five minutes. Then, he slowly answers, "No. Aaron told him to fuck off."

"Interesting." Bee smiles at the almost pleased and smug tone Andrew has about Aaron's blatant refusal. "So, we are to assume that Aaron could care less about becoming a fratbro, in particular, Andy's pledging little brother."

Andrew leans back in his chair, not up to talking at the moment, only up for listening, and Bee freely gives her perspective.

"You're being irrational, Andrew, and that's due to feeling insecure, which is a normal reaction people have about those they see as loved ones potentially slipping away. Initially, Aaron was the one who reached out to you, chose you, wanted you both to be brothers regardless of circumstances. He easily could've went about his business, knowing your existence, never once trying to get you in his life and you'd be nonethewiser. Instead, he made a deal to keep you by his side, Andrew. It was a choice. His choice. You were wanted. A family member wanted you."

Bee watches Andrew for any minute change of expression before continuing.

"Now, this random Andy Mathers comes into the picture. Offering brotherhood much like Aaron did for you. And Aaron's in your former position all those years ago, having the option to choose Andy back, like how you chose Aaron back. The Minyard twins sticking together through college. Except..."

Andrew waits for Bee to assess him some more.

"This is different than what you and Aaron have. Andy toying with the idea of adopting Aaron into his fold. They share a common goal to become doctors, and that means they could have more similar interests, the kind that binds people together perhaps closer than those they share blood with. Am I striking a nerve?"

"Several." Andrew's blunt about it.

She can always put his conflicted thoughts and sentiments into words he can't say. Bee sets aside her notepad.

"All you need to do is remember that no matter what, you and Aaron will always be brothers. No one can take that from you two. Here, Andrew. I have some exercises for you to do that'll reinforce how Aaron won't replace you with Andy Mathers, or that Andy Mathers won't take Aaron from you."

And so, much to his chagrin, Andrew obliges Bee if it means he can stay in control of his emotions.

-----

Aaron finds it very weird that Andrew is more present in his life than usual. He thought joint therapy with Bee, mandatory Exy practice with the Foxes, and the weekly trip to Columbia would be it for them as far as acknowledging the other exists. Now, whenever Aaron’s done with his last class of the day, Andrew’s there waiting across the lecture hall or lab doorway leaning on the wall, and they'll walk to the dorms together.

It takes Aaron by surprise every single time. Mostly because of Andrew's clear, direct commands the moment he's aware Aaron notices him from the throng of rushing pre-med students.

“Hang out with me.” Words Aaron least expected to hear from his twin.

Feels like Aaron's being hunted, how well Andrew can catch him off guard with unforced honesty that Aaron didn't have to pull teeth to get. In his own Andrew way, Aaron supposes, his twin is specifically seeking his attention and it freaks him out so much he internally copes by viewing Andrew as a science experiment, thinking it'll ease the new tension developing between them.

“Video game.” Andrew would say after ambushing Aaron yet again at the end of the day and Aaron quickly deciphered the non-descriptive meanings in due time.

When Andrew simply says “video game” it means he and Aaron are to solve a horror puzzle game all night until completion. Sleep be damned and junk food their only nutrition. Nicky is not to participate, it must solely be a twin activity.

When Andrew says “nap” it means he is ordering a fatigued Aaron to take a break from studying and come nap with him. Basically letting the other Monsters know that the Minyard twins have commandeered the bean bags and that they will be murdered gruesomely if their nap time is disturbed.

When Andrew says “ice cream” it means Aaron is driven off campus to the recently opened ice cream shop where they eat so much they get sick and it's only them enjoying the array of flavors. They deem it worth the hassle, sharing petty amusement at Nicky whining about the rise of blatant favoritism within their circle while Kevin scolds the twins’ poor diet, and Neil is hilariously stressed at Aaron lording over knowing a secret place that Andrew refuses to take his junkie to.

A few weeks later of this routine, Aaron dares to assume that he and Andrew are… bonding? Getting closer? They're something, alright.

“Back from Twin Time already?” Neil and Nicky have evilly coined Andrew and Aaron's hanging out. If they weren't invited, then they'd be bitchy about it.

“Shut up!” Aaron stomps off, hurrying to his dorm room, avoiding Neil and Nicky's teasing.

Andrew doesn't seem bothered by it, even getting in on the joke by texting or telling Aaron “twin time” so he knows to drop everything and look at his twin's face. Like a bat signal summoning Aaron.

Aaron gets more confused by the day, though he can't say he's not pleased at their improving relationship.

Then Andy shows up again begging that Aaron re-considers about pledging the frat.

“It'll be worthwhile! I promise you that.” Andy has no idea he's on a landmine.

The cousins, Kevin, and Neil are on their way to Columbia when Andy approaches them in the parking lot.

“No means no.” Aaron rolls his eyes.

Kevin and Neil keep walking to the car. Nicky and Andrew come to a stop, sizing Andy up. Since Aaron first brought him around, Nicky has let all the Foxes know of his lust towards Andy and how it's a shame Aaron doesn't swing.

“I wouldn't mind being in a house full of men!” Nicky proposes with a flirty smile.

“Hello to you, too, Nicky.” Andy nods politely.

Andrew takes a step closer to be side by side with Aaron. He darkens his eyes, coldly gazing.

“Aren't frats known to drug people and be shady? They get away with more crime, too, right?” Andrew tilts his head at Andy, enjoying making the older man squirm at the scrutiny.

Aaron scoffs. Pot calling kettle black. The Monsters have the same reputation, it's just among the Foxes gossip.

“If you're worried about Aaron's safety, don't. I'm a pretty big deal. I'll protect him.” Andy tries to schmooze, putting on a charming smile that'd woo donors and win parents over, hoping Nicky and Andrew are the same saps and can convince Aaron to change his mind.

Andrew subtly does some breathing techniques, part of the exercises Bee taught him, because he has the urge to reach for his knife and carve Andy like a pumpkin.

“Aaron doesn't need you to protect him.”

And Andrew really wants to claim that he is Aaron's protector. That he's kept Aaron alive even from his own self-destruction. That only he is his brother's keeper. But Bee would call that regression so instead Andrew claws his way to maturity despite making his skin crawl.

“Aaron can protect himself just fine. He doesn't need anyone like you watching his back.”

Probably the first genuine compliment Andrew says aloud about Aaron's capabilities. Nicky is shocked, a bit teary eyed and sentimental and honored to be a witness to this. Aaron's eyes widen and his jaw drops, looking at Andrew like he grew a second head.

Andy awkwardly clears his throat being on the receiving end of Andrew's mild aggression.

“Y-Yes, Aaron is popular among the biochem department for his resilience.” Andy barges on. “Did you know he has a fan club?”

“He does?!” Nicky squeals.

“I do?” Aaron can't keep having whiplash or he'll hurt his neck.

“They do?!” Nicky snaps his head to Andrew along with Aaron.

“Of course I know.”

Andrew always knows what type of people Aaron attracts, murder case or not. His twin's useless at recognizing that people admire him from afar (having Andrew in proximity fuels the distance also).

“We look alike. Sometimes his fan club mistakes me for him.”

Andrew looks bored. “Yeah. They're not that smart for future doctors. Thinking I'm Aaron and confessing their undying love or whatever. I'm constantly reminding them that the only pre-med I tolerate dating Aaron is the cheerleader. Anyone else can go six feet under.”

“You threatened my classmates?” Aaron can't believe this, smacking a hand to his forehead.

“The real question is why are your classmates wannabe homewreckers? Aren't you in a supposedly happy relationship? Unless you and the cheerleader are finally breaking up.” Andrew is unapologetic as ever.

Andy watches the back and forth. He dons a strange expression. Aaron comes to realize later that Andy looked resigned.

“Well, I'm here if you decide frat life is for you Aaron. Just figured since you go clubbing religiously, you'd like to host the parties of the year too. I'll let you get back to your family. See you in class.”

Andrew feels accomplished observing Andy getting the hell away from them. Nicky's saddened that he's lost another pretty face to gawk at. They resume walking to the car. Nicky merrily climbs in, but Andrew halts Aaron, leaning in to whisper in his twin's ear.

“You really wanna be Andy's little brother? He can get you a lot farther with his support?”

Aaron is startled for a third time tonight and his brain clicks it together when he glances at Andrew's face.

Oh. So it's like that then. Aaron's science experiment of a clone has revealed stunning test results.

“You're already a pain in the ass, Andrew. Why the fuck would I want more brothers? One is enough.”

Andrew relaxes a bit knowing what Aaron means instantly. Man, he simultaneously loves and hates when Bee's right on the money.

Nicky, Kevin, and Neil (all nosy) peer out from the cracked car window.

“Thank fuck we're only children.”

[puck-luck]

hi andy! this is my first ever ask but i just love your writing so so much that i had to participate. could i please order a chai latte with peppermint for any of the hughes brothers, you pick, i trust your brilliant mind- best friends brother trope. congrats on one year! 🫶

i am so honored to be the recipient of your first ever ask<3 i went with jack for this blurb (1.9K) and reader is luke's best friend.

warnings: possessive jack, guilt from reader, unprotected p in v, kind of insecure luke (sry lulu), spit kink, DIRTY talk, uhhhh without spoiling it... having sex in... someone else's bed.

You were doomed the first time Luke told you that he sometimes feels like he’s just Jack’s little brother. You were at Michigan with him at the time, hanging out in his dorm room while Dylan was out, when you and Luke had your first real deep talk. It was late at night and you both were overtired, but you weren’t willing to go back to your room just yet. Luke didn’t want you to leave, either. You both were having a lot of fun talking and baring your souls to each other.

“I love my brothers, but sometimes it feels like people only want to be my friend because of them,” Luke had admitted quietly. “I wish more people were interested in, like… me. Not ‘Luke Hughes,’ but… just me.”

You hadn’t met the brothers at that point, although you felt like you knew them from Luke’s stories alone. Without telling him, you vowed that you’d never feel more for his brothers than you do for Luke. You’ve become friends with each of them over the years, and friendship was fine as long as they didn’t overtake Luke as your best friend, but things took a turn this spring.

It’s your final semester at UMich and you’re trying to make the most of it. When Jack got injured in March, Luke had asked you to keep an eye on him while he was living alone in the lake house and recovering. Luke was worried that Jack would become hermitish and sullen in the wake of his injury and another surgery, so you’d been more than happy to send Luke updates.

Jack was lonely in the house. You started spending more and more time there, keeping him company. You’d spend the afternoons there when you were done with classes, studying and hanging out with Jack so he didn’t feel quite so isolated. You started spending the night because it was too late to drive an hour back to Ann Arbor and Jack promised it wasn’t putting him out at all. In fact, it was his idea.

Then it happened. Things went too far one night and you ended up breaking your own vow. The first time, you thought it was a fluke. You avoided the house for a full week until Luke texted you and asked how Jack was doing, cornering you and forcing you to go back to see if he was okay. It happened again… and again.

You regret it every morning, feeling like garbage for feeling something more for Jack when you swore you’d never make Luke feel like you’re just friends with him for his brother, and yet you can’t seem to stop yourself from succumbing to Jack whenever he looks at you like that.

He took you out to a bar tonight, celebrating the end of the school year. All you have left are your finals and then you’ll be done, graduated, and on the job hunt. You’ve been looking, but haven’t found anything yet, and you’ve got a full summer to apply and hope for the best. 

You’re both tipsy when you make it back to the house. Jack was kissing you in the Uber and kisses you all the way up the walkway, pressing your body into the front door as he fumbles with his key and blindly lets you in. You almost fall backwards into the foyer when he opens the door, but Jack wraps a strong arm around your waist and keeps you upright. He keeps your core aligned with his bulge, showing you just how badly he wants you.

The house is dark as you make your way upstairs. You’re lost in Jack’s kisses, allowing him to guide you in the general direction of a bed. One of his hands has snaked its way up your shirt and taken it off, dropping it in the hallway, and is now working on unclasping your bra. His mouth trails down to your neck, sloppily licking over your jaw and sucking a hickey beneath your earlobe.

You and Jack collapse against the mattress, his body solid on top of yours. He rolls his hips down, between the juncture of your thighs, and you moan into his mouth. The uninhibited thrust of his covered cock against your clothed core was satisfying in the way that it only can be in this state– tipsy and drunk on the lingering taste of beer on Jack’s tongue. 

He finally removes your bra and gets his mouth on your tits, sucking blemishes over the soft skin as his fingers unbutton your jeans and wiggle inside your panties. You’re already dripping from all the times his tongue sparred with yours on the journey up to this room, so Jack is met with no resistance when two of his fingers make their way inside of you.

“So fucking wet,” Jack praises, his voice a low growl. “God, baby, you’ve soaked your panties already. All because I gave you a few kisses?”

You whimper and grind into his touch, his fingertips close to but not touching your g-spot. “All for you,” you confirm in a wanton voice, saying anything that’ll speed this up. Your abdomen is a dam that’s waiting to burst. 

Jack takes your nipple in his mouth and hollows his cheeks, suckling harshly and flicking his tongue over the bud. He looks up at you with those deep blue eyes, dark and glinting through the shadows of the bedroom, and a strand of hair falls over his forehead. The heel of his palm rubs against your clit, applying pressure as his fingers beckon inside of you quickly. He rolls his hips into your thigh, his hard length getting some well-deserved attention through his own pants. He moans against your nipple, tongue flat and eyelashes fluttering, and switches sides before rolling his hips again. He bites down on your nipple and his fingers dance against your g-spot, the stimulation against your clit too much to hold back, and you come with shaky legs because of all of Jack’s efforts and how pretty he looks with his pink lips wrapped around the peak of your breast.

“Atta girl,” Jack continues, licking over his bottom lip in a way that is almost predatory. “You want this?” He thrusts against your thigh again, overexaggerated and slow. “Want me to fuck you, pretty girl?”

“Jack,” you plead. He’s still wearing his t-shirt, so you fist the fabric and try to pull it off. 

He chuckles and gets his hands on the back of his collar, tugging the shirt from his body and throwing it across the room. He lays a kiss on your mouth before standing at the edge of the bed and unzipping his pants, frantically shimmying out of them. 

You do the same, matching his pace. You’re writhing on the quilted blanket atop the bed, which is weird because you could’ve sworn that Jack has a comforter, given the fact that he runs cold, but you’re more focused on freeing your legs and removing your panties so that Jack can hurry up and get inside you.

Both sufficiently naked, Jack stays at the foot of the bed, pulling you towards him by your hips. He brings one of your ankles to rest on his shoulder, allowing the other one to dangle. Your foot finds the floor and Jack kicks it wide, making space for himself. He fists his cock and slaps the head against your clit before finding your gaping, seeping entrance with the blunt tip. 

You arch your back when he thrusts forward sharply, half of his length working into you at once. He draws back out and fucks inside of you entirely on the second thrust, filling you up and knocking the breath from your lungs. “Oh my God,” you moan.

Jack smirks at that. “Oh, yeah?” he asks. He plants his hands on either side of your shoulders, hinging forward so he’s hovering above you. The stretch in your hamstrings is enough to have you humming in relief, then Jack catches your mouth while it’s still open and launches a glob of spit onto your tongue. 

Your eyes roll back in your head and you swallow the saliva, feeling Jack’s hand move down to grasp your throat. In the already dark room, your vision dances with black spots from the deprivation of oxygen. 

“Touch yourself,” Jack commands in a strong voice, leaving no room for argument. “Rub your clit. Make yourself feel good while I fuck you.”

You nod helplessly, right hand finding the apex of your legs and struggling to make proper contact with the sensitive nerves due to Jack’s rough thrusts displacing your body. Once you’re able to get your hand in the right place, you’re circling your fingers uncontrollably, hips jerking into your touch and into Jack’s brutal, ramming movements. 

Your brain is fuzzy and your eyes are screwed shut and Jack’s hand is on your neck and his mouth is poised right next to your ear and he whispers–

“Does it feel good, huh? Are you about to come, baby?”

“Please, Jack, can I? I’m so close,” you babble, lips touching the curve of his jaw and tasting the droplets of sweat that have formed there. 

You feel his smile, his evil, beautiful smile, form. He licks over your earlobe and traps it between his lips, gently tugging. “Let go whenever you’re ready, sweet thing.”

You shudder and your free hand goes around the nape of Jack’s neck. Your fingers curl into the long strands and he hisses at the pressure against his scalp, but he doesn’t stop moving. He drops another line of spit into your open mouth, then kisses your lax lips.

You feel like what you imagine a supernova feels like– a bright, hot, abrupt flash of energy collapsing against itself and becoming completely destroyed. 

Jack clicks his tongue and talks you through it. “Oh, there you go… what would Lukey think if he could see you now, hear all the nonsense you’re saying while you come all over his big brother’s cock? On his bed, baby? You’re such a slut, God, so perfect for me, just for me…”

He drives his hips into your heat, bodies slapping together in a wet symphony until Jack trembles and releases his load right in your pussy, flooding your cunt and claiming you. 

You breathe heavily, gasping and trying to catch your breath after that intense orgasm. It’s the strongest one that you’ve ever experienced and it’s followed by a terrible comedown– the abrupt comprehension of what Jack just said and how you’d desecrated your best friend’s bedroom with his older brother, the one that everyone seems to adore more than sweet Luke. You’re mortified as Jack pulls out of your cunt and grins down at his handiwork, teeth glinting in the moonlight that seeps through the window. You feel frozen in place, ice running through your veins as Jack’s hot cum leaks out of your pussy and onto Luke’s quilt. 

His words were possessive. He growled them in your ears with full confidence and worse, he was right. You’re a slut for Jack, you’re drunk on him, you keep falling into this trap and digging yourself deeper, and there’s no way Luke can ever know. You’re screwed– but you also can’t stop. It’s too good, Jack is too good, and you feel empty without him around. Fuck.

[tgmsunmontue]

A picture is worth 1000 words - 14/?

Hangster post-TGM events, Jake and Bradley becoming friends on Instagram through increasingly competitive thirst traps.

ONE TWO THREE FOUR FIVE SIX SEVEN EIGHT NINE TEN ELEVEN TWELVE THIRTEEN

PART FOURTEEN

                He makes it through the rest of the afternoon and dinner, but the entire time he feels on edge. Not nervous or worried, just… on edge. Having Rooster here, his eyes on him, makes him feel like he’s under a microscope. He’d be worried except he knows Rooster likes what he sees. Since he linked their pinkies while they walked around the zoo he’s noticed Bradshaw has become a little bolder, letting his hand settle on any part of Jake’s body as he walks past, or as they stand or sit somewhere.

                It’s been fucking distracting and also arousing, knows Bradshaw has been meaning it as such. The way they’ve started exchanging heavier and heavier looks and he’s so fucking grateful that there’s the well-worn routine of making dinner and looking after the kids, although Kara has been smirking at him non-stop since Lexis and Andy declared that Jake had been holding Rooster’s hand in case he got lost. His hissed conversation with her about how it hadn’t been technically hand holding had been shot down in flames, and she just seems happy for him so he can’t even be annoyed with her. It is weird though, figuring things out with Bradley in view of his sister and best-friend. Then again he had front row seats and a backstage pass to them getting together so maybe he shouldn’t feel too self-conscious about the whole thing.

                Dinner happens without incident, Kaleb and Kara handling their kids and waving off his and Bradley’s help after dinner, telling him, them, that they’ve earnt a night off what with keeping the kids entertained all day. Kara throws him a wink at that and he doesn’t need to imagine anything else about his sister and best friend and what they may have done while they were all out.

                “How about you guys go for a ride. You can show Bradley the farm…” Kaleb suggests.

                “Not everyone loves the farm as much as you do…” Jake mutters, but Bradshaw has perked up, like he likes the idea. And it would give them a little privacy at least. Then again, he’s also got his own place not twenty yards away which would also give them plenty of privacy. Well. First things first.

                “Come on then… go and get changed. Bring a jacket. Meet you outside.”

                He’s nervous he realizes, and Kara and Kaleb both know him well enough to be able to tell, Kara giving him a tiny little sarcastic wave, and of course Kaleb gives him a supportive thumbs up and he loves them, but somedays he really wishes they’d just fuck off. He goes to his place and quickly grabs a couple more layers, pulls them on. It may have been a warm day, but the nights are still cool. Doesn’t think about taking them off later. He steps back out and Rooster is there waiting, staring out across the fields and Jake moves to stand by him, shoving his hands in his pockets to stop himself reaching for him.

                “Do you want to learn how to ride?”

                “I mean what else did I come for?”

                Jake snorts, glances to the side to see Bradley smirking at him and he shakes his head in exasperation. Rooster’s making it too fucking easy. Or is it deliberate?

                “You came to learn how to ride a horse?”

                “Well, that’s what’s on offer right now. Unless you want a shaving lesson…”

                The look he’s giving Jake is considering and Jake wants to close the distance between them, lick into his mouth, see if Bradley wants to kiss him as badly as Jake wants to kiss him.

                “You know that ain’t true…” Jake mutters and Bradshaw huffs, and he feels like snapping at it, but Bradley’s fingers are linking with his, a proper handhold, his hands are warm.

                “How about we just go for a walk…” Bradshaw suggests.

                Honestly, he’d rather ride, but he can’t hold Rooster’s hand while riding, not with him being a beginner anyway. So walking it is.

FIFTEEN

[unorthodoxfaithxx]

Shen Smut Fic from Undead Unluck

Nsfw; AFAB ; slight yandere

“I’m usually one to play the role of a gentleman, but I think you’ve kept me waiting long enough, no?”

In which Shen finally has enough of your worrywart antics and decides to put matters into his own hands.

———————

It was supposed to be a regular quest - capture the UMA, be rewarded with a Negator’s location, find the Negator, and be done with it. 

So why were you deserted in Japan, in a LOVE HOTEL of all places, stuck with the most unintentionally insufferable man on the planet? 

“Jeez,” you sigh, face-palming your forehead, “I can’t believe Andy and Fuuko left without us! And what for? The newest copy of Shonen Jump?!” 

You hear a laugh from behind. Shen was sitting cross legged on the gaudy heart-shaped mattress provided with the room, leaning his chin into a hand while he watches you pace around the room, and, much to your chagrin, with amusement. 

How could he be so nonchalant about everything? His cool demeanor always contrasted your reactive, uptight one, and without even trying to he manages to piss you off on the daily. 

“Look, I’m sure they’ll be back soon. Or they won’t. Méi wèntí (no problem)!”

You slap your cheeks with a groan. “It’s absolutely an issue, Shen! We’ve wasted how many days trying to capture UMA ____? And now instead of doing anything productive we’re stuck here cause those two decided to ditch us!” 

His polite smile does little to reassure you. 

“You’re way too worried.”

“And you aren’t?!”

He hums, tapping his face. “Not necessarily. Whatever Fuuka told Andy, it must have been important. You saw the way he carried her off with a sprint, no? I trust they have some sort of plan. Although like you, I wish they would have given us a heads up.” 

While you sure loved Fuuko, her brash plans always gave you the worst fucking headaches. You’re glad Andy is there to protect her, but still. 

You sigh and plop face down on the mattress next to the blue haired man. 

For a moment, there is only silence. Eventually, you forfeit.

“…For what it’s worth, this bed sure is comfy.” 

“Right?” Shen agrees, moving to lay down on his back and stare at the hot pink ceiling. 

“Don’t take this the wrong way, Y/N, but I think you’re too stressed most of the time. Have you ever tried meditation? I’m no meditation master, but I can offer you some pointers.” 

“No thanks,” You grimace at him, “Meditation stresses me out.”

“That’s counterintuitive.” 

“I know.”

More silence. 

He turns his head to face you. “Well if you happen to find a way to destress and need a partner, I’d be happy to lend a hand. I’d offer to spar with you, but I know you’re not much of a fighter.” 

“That’s…that’s real nice of you, Shen. Thanks.” 

“Of course,” His smile reaches his eyes when he adds, “You’re cute when you’re pouting, but I think you’re even prettier with a smile on your face instead.”

It takes a second for the words to click in your head, then a blush blooms across your face.  

“Hey. Can I be honest with you for a second?”

“Gànba (go ahead).”

“When we first met, I hated your guts. You always had this shit eating grin on your face no matter what’s happening, and it drove me insane. It’s really hard to tell what you’re actually feeling behind that smile. It made it difficult to trust you, and I already had a hard time trusting people as it was. Still do, actually.” 

You continue on. “But after spending more time with you and the others, I’ve learned that you’re not all that bad. And maybe you are hard to read sometimes but I trust that you’re not a threat and want to protect the people you care about. And I find that really admirable, ya know? A lot. So uh? I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’d like to get to know you more as a person and be friends. And that I’m sorry for always having my head up my ass.”

His eyes widen at your words and you look away abashedly. “I mean, if being buddies is a problem then I totally understand I mean whywouldyouwannahangoutwithmeinthefirstplace—“

He reaches to grab your hand, halting your rambling. “Does that mean I have permission?”

“Uh, permission to what?”

He squeezes your hand, eyes ablaze with something you couldn’t put your finger on. “To kiss you.”

Immediately you’re a stuttering mess. “Hah?? I mean - what - no, I - that’s totally inappropriate, we can’t —“ He locks eyes with you, “Please kiss me.” 

You’re shocked. Did he just use his Negator ability on you?

He ears turn pink at your proclamation and he says, “Of course. Anything you want.”

Before you can say anything in retaliation he’s moving in on you like a shark. With a hand cupping the back of your head, his lips meet yours hungrily, leaving your body slack with shock. You can barely breathe as he fights his way into your mouth, tongue exploring inside your mouth fervently. You bring your hands up to his chest to push back but he doesn’t budge. 

It feels like eternity before he lets you go. When he finally relents, you’re gasping for breath. You look into his eyes, shocked to see that they’re dilated, blown wide with excitement.

He says breathlessly, “I’ve been interested in you since the day you joined the Union. I did everything I could to get you to like me. I tried to be the nice guy, be polite and approachable, but you never seemed to wanna let me in. I was honestly beginning to give up. You don’t know how happy I am to finally hear you say that.” 

His strong hand roams to grip your waist. Tightly. With a low whisper he says, “I want you. I want all of you. And if you let me, I’m going to do more than just kiss you, my dear.” 

You’re so flustered you don’t even know what to say. “I — you — wait. You like me?Why? I mean we’re basically coworkers aren’t we and I don’t know about you but datingcoworkershasalwaysbeenweirdand—“

He gives you a knowing wink, and you’re back to speaking your hidden truths again. 

“I want you more than I can say.“ Fuck Untruth. 

Apparently you said that last bit out loud, because Shen gives you a hearty laugh, so much he has to wipe a tear from his eye. 

Embarrassed, you want to get up and leave the room, but he’s still looking at you. His ability is still turned on and you can’t budge.

“Yeah, I can’t let you leave. Not when I finally know how you really feel about me.”

Great. 

His face almost seems apologetic. “Forgive me, Y/N my dear. I just know that this is the only way I can get the truth out of you.”

You want to yell at him but your mouth will only tell another story. With slight apprehension, you watch as his signature smile mutates into something darker, more predatory. 

“I’m usually one to play the role of a gentleman,” He inches closer to you, lips whispering against your ear, “But I think you’ve kept me waiting long enough, no?”

You gulp. 

With a quick push, he immediately has you on your back, staring up at him like a deer in the headlights. His arms are around both sides of your head, legs caging you in. You find yourself shaking with either anxiety or excitement, you can’t tell. 

“Fàngsōng (relax). I promise I won’t hurt you. Unless you want that, that is”. 

You move a hand up to cover his eyes so he can’t use his Negation, sparing the both of you from whatever embarrassing remark would come out of your mouth otherwise. 

Despite the hand in his face, he was smiling at you like a villain. “You know, you’re not really helping your case by doing that. I can still tell what you want, see?”

A gasp escapes your lips as you feel a hand trail down your pants, into your panties. An electrifying tingle flows through you when Shen rubs you in a circular motion. Opening your eyes, he’s already taken his hand out (much to your disappointment) and is staring at the slick coating his fingers. Your hand is long gone from his face. 

“Hmm, pretty wet.” He hums. 

You watch mortifyingly as Shen licks his fingers clean, the sight counteractively igniting something within your core. 

“And you taste pretty damn good, too.”

He gets off you and starts tugging your pants off. Before he goes further, asks, “Can I?”

He doesn’t even have to use his ability. You respond with a small, barely above a whisper, “yes”. 

With your face as red as it can possibly be, the muscular man gives you a flirtatious wink, his eyes lidded with lust at this point. 

Both your pants and undergarments are thrown across the room, and your lower half is left bare for him to see. By instinct you try to close your legs, wanting to hide, but the Union member’s arms keep you open. 

The way he stares at your pussy has you feeling faint of heart. He’s eyeing you like you’re a famous painting he’ll only get to see once in his life, doing his best to analyze and remember every detail. 

“Can you please stop staring? This is embarrassing,” You whimper. 

“No need to be so shy, my dear. You’re beautiful. I want to see everything.” His enthusiasm does little to settle your nerves. 

With a devious smirk, he lays on his stomach, face between your thighs.

“Xiè xie nǐ de shí wù (Thanks for the food).” 

Fire erupts through your veins when you feel his warm tongue lap at your folds, sliding up and down in the best way imaginable. His lips gently suckle on your clit, and despite not wanting to be loud, you cry out with fervor. You swear the pleasure is insurmountable. 

Your hands grip the fabric of the mattress you’re on, and when his tongue dips in and out of your entrance, you can only moan pathetically. 

“Fuck. Even your moans sound so beautiful,” Shen praises in adoration. You turn to look away, only to have your head jerked back in Shen’s direction. “We can’t be having that. Keep looking at me, my dear. I wanna see those beautiful eyes of yours filled with pleasure.”

Lewd slurping sounds fill the room. 

He looks so pleased with himself while you quiver under his grasp, something intense gradually building inside of you. Your hands instinctively move to grip his hair, mindlessly pushing him down further to eat you out. You feel yourself reaching close to that high, and when that strong tension in your core finally snaps, you feel lightheaded from the your intense orgasm.  

You’re so sensitive that every nerve of your body feels lit up. But that doesn’t stop Shen. 

The man keeps lapping you up, causing you to grip his hair tighter as you cry, “Fuck, I came! I came I came I came, stop, it’s so fucking sensitive, god!” 

It takes another minute of begging before 

He opts to listen to you. He chuckles. “Well, did my girl like that? You tasted so good, mhm.”

You’re left speechless, still reeling from your orgasm. Shen gets up on his knees and begins to strip. You always knew he was buff, but you’re mesmerized by his toned muscles as he removes his shirt, revealing a chiseled stomach and oh-so broad chest. 

You feel heat rise to your cheeks when he sends you another wink, obviously enjoying the fact that you’re ogling him. When he slides his pants off, you see that he’s hard with want, the tip of his veiny cock an angry red color. You feel intimidated by the sheer size. 

He’s big. 

“Uhm…I don’t think that’s gonna fit,” you mumble nervously. 

He laughs at that. “Sure it will. We’ll make it work, my dear.”

Now as naked as you, he moves to give you another fiery kiss, his tongue tangling itself with yours. He reminds you again how beautiful you are, whispering praises between every break. He touches you again, pleased that your juices and his spit have you sopping when through and through. 

Finally, when he feels like he can’t wait any longer, what would be a loud cry from you is silenced by a kiss as he moves to shove his member into your weeping entrance. He has you caged between his arms again, your legs wrapped around his torso. It’s a slow endeavor at first, letting you get used to his size as he stretches you out.

“Fuck, fuck fuck!” You feel your insides being stuffed to the brim with his cock. He slowly moves in, until he finally fully braces himself inside you.

He gently moves in and out, a slothful but sure pace. He opts to wrap his tongue around the hard nipple of your breast. 

“Good girl,” he praises, “Taking me so well, aren’t you.”

“I—I don’t…” You words fall at the wayside. 

“Fuck,” he groans, “We’re meant to be together, don’t you see?”

Shen awaits an answer but your words regress to babbles and whines.

You whimper as he suckles on your neck, bound to leave a nasty hickey after. The pleasure is too overwhelming and you inch to get away. It’s futile though — he has you locked in.

“You’re not getting away,” his soft voice turns into a growl when he realizes you’re trying to evade him, and he grabs the arms you were pushing at his chest with, opting to pin them down at each side of your head. 

“I’ll make you feel so good you can’t get away.”

All of a sudden, the movement of his hips snaps from gentle to rough, the stronger man voraciously sheathing his cock in and out of you like a beast in heat.

“Oh god,” You words slur as your mouth pools with saliva, drooling from total ecstasy, unable to do anything except hold on to the man who’s ravaging you. Tears of delight prickle at your eyes.

You feel so good you can hardly think straight, blissfully enjoying the sudden roughness he displays as he mutters, “Don’t think anyone else can make you feel this good, huh? Nǐ shì wǒ de (You are mine).” 

He pumps into you relentlessly, looking down on you with crazed lust in his eyes, watching as your eyes nearly roll back in enjoyment. You feel so full, you don’t know how you can continue taking it. 

“Shen, Shen, I can’t take it!”

“Yes, you can. And you will.” He commands. 

Another orgasm threatens to overcome you, and even though you’re begging him to give you a minute of respite, he doesn’t comply. 

“I’ve waited so long to have you, you’re not getting a break that easily.”

He gets you to where you’re on your knees, ass up with your face in a pillow. 

With a groan he’s back inside you, hitting your insides deeper than you thought possible. 

“You’re too perfect, I can watch you all day,” He confesses. 

Your cries bounce off the walls of the room when he gives your ass a slap. It stings, but you’re so far on Cloud 9 that you don’t care. If anything, it’s the catalyst to you cumming once more. Shen eyes in fascination as your cunt spazzes around his member, highly satisfied with himself for making you feel so good. 

He kneads your ass as you’re gasping for air, basically sobbing from your orgasm taking the life out of you. Your cunt is twitching when he slowly pulls out, only to slam back in as hard as he possibly can. He fastens his grip on your ass, pulling you back into him when you try to move further away. 

“No running,” He chastises, earning another hard slap on your ass. You yelp at the roughness of it all, but in truth? Maybe you’re enjoying it a lot more than you should. 

You turn your head as best as you can to look at the man ravaging you. He’s looking at you with such intense focus, gritting his teeth in an unnerving grin that leaves you feeling aroused and like you’re prey. Sweat beads down his forehead and chest as he continues to pound you, leaving your pussy a wet and stuttering mess. 

His hands meet your waist and with one deft move your back hits the bed again. You hear Shen curse before your sweat covered, fucked-out sinful visage, and you don’t bother holding back the moan that leaves your throat when the angry red head of his dick slides back into your entrance.

“So good,” He grunts, fucking you into a mating press. He moves a hand down to fumble with your clit, eliciting all the cries he’s grown to love hearing out of you. 

You feel as if you might come again, and you know Shen is getting close too when the man’s thrusts grow sporadic. 

“That’s it,” He encourages through clenched teeth, “Cum for me. Cum on my cock!”

His words send you over the edge, and you clench around his dick once more. 

“Yes, please,” He hears you beg, and that’s all he needs to climax himself. A quick couple of thrusts and he pulls out, hastily pumping his long shaft with a hand until thick ropes of cum decorate your chest. 

He reaches for the towel conveniently placed on the nightstand and gently wipes away the mess he made.

“Hahhh,” Once he’s done, he breathes out a pleased sigh, collapsing beside on you the bed. 

“Holy shit,” You say through unsteady breaths. You try to reel yourself in after all those intense orgasms. 

Unfortunately for you, post nut clarity hits hard and FAST, and you immediately make way to get up and clean off, and maybe bury yourself someplace hidden. You get the nagging feeling that maybe your bed partner will regret his decision later on, and howcouldyoulookhimintheeyesnow—-

Shen tugs your hand back and pulls you close, wrapping you in his arms. 

“Hey, don’t leave me all by myself! Let’s stay like this for a while, yes?” He says. 

“I…okay,” You can’t help but agree, comfortable in his warm embrace. The two of you stay like that for a while, basking in the afterglow of the deed and eachother’s presence. 

———————————————————————

Fuuka was throwing duck feed into a pond when Andy sat down next to her, watching with a mischievous grin as all the ducks scattered away under his scrutinizing glare. 

“Say,” Fuuka starts after slapping her partner on the shoulder for his harassment of the ducks, “Do you think we can head back to the hotel now? We already spent the money Shen gave us for Shonen Jump.”

Andy hums, finger on his chin in thought. 

“Nah, Shen asked us to leave for the whole day, remember? Let’s get dinner before heading back.”

“Why do you think Shen wanted us gone in the first place? It’s not like the quest required that we split into teams.”

Andy gives her a pointed look. 

“What?” She says quizzically.

After a few seconds, her face glows beet red, eyes wide with realization.

Hotel + privacy + man + woman = ???

“Holy crap. No way!” She shouts. 

“Yes way. So for our sake and theirs, let’s not go back until late tonight.”

She nods in agreement, fanning her flustered face. 

———-

thanks for reading! And @shiroisotto64, from one Shen lover to another, hope you enjoyed it ;)

[lisafication]

Digging Graves for your Morals; Or, The Ethical Problem of Outlawry

Hello, yes, I am here again. This one is shorter, I swear (it’s under four thousand words, even). If this is the first post from me you’re seeing, this is a follow-up to my prior essay posted here on the game The Coffin of Andy and Leyley, although it should be able to mostly stand alone.

At the end of my last essay, I touched on both the game’s nearly uncompromising moral scepticism and relativity, but I didn’t really dig into it. I outlined that the game only textually frames actions as ‘morally bad’ in the context of a morality set by the society and the world that has treated them as no better than farm animals raised for the slaughter. Well, I have a lot to say on the topic of ethics on the topic of The Coffin of Andy and Leyley, so buckle in, this one’s going to talk about the social contract, moral scepticism and everyone’s favourite topic: Mrs. Graves.

As usual, this was originally posted and formatted for on Sufficient Velocity and you can perhaps more easily read it there. Spoilers abound, and my content warning from last time still applies.

She’s not too hot on either ethics or her mother

The Meat of the Matter

Since a lot of this is optional or otherwise missable information, let’s review the premise the game gives us. If you’re already aware of all of this, I apologise, it won’t take long.

First off the bat, the quarantine at the start of the game was a hoax-driven money-making scheme of which you can pick up more-or-less all the relevant details of. This is entirely missable and by the time it’s possible to discover, our protagonists have better things to dwell on and have dialogue about, so I’ll give you a summary of what you can deduce from reading the notes and thinking about it.

The quarantine is an organ harvesting operation, as per some documents you can discover in the wardens’ office. They entrap the residents, test their blood types and starve to death those they deem surplus to requirements — alternatively the starvation itself could be their method of ‘preparing the harvest’, there’s evidence in both directions and it hardly matters — harvesting the organs of the others for sale. As our protagonists are AB-typed, the ‘universal recipient’ or ‘most selfish blood type’, they’re some of the first on the chopping block.

If you read through the newspapers and the documents in Mr. Washing Machine’s car, you can discover that ultimately ToxiSoda are responsible, and a similar thing is happening in a different city under the guise of a ‘chemical leak’.  Should you further investigate matters, you will find mentions of the ‘man behind it all’, the doctor, or the Surgeon, as the fandom have been referring to him — you may recall Mrs. Graves mentioned someone similar! Yeah, he’s the guy who runs ToxiSoda, who are themselves partners with the water company that faked the parasite outbreak in the first place.

It’s all a life insurance scam, apparently

How much the details of the operation matter is something open to interpretation — it might just be something for players to figure out and Episode 3 will not cover the Surgeon at all, or he might play a major part; it's not particularly relevant to this essay. What matters is that it happened at all — indeed, it’s fairly easy to justify Ashley and Andrew in everything they did in Episode 1 (flashbacks aside), arguing that if they’d made any other decisions they’d have died — an argument that the victims dug their own graves, even if the Graves siblings put them in them. How correct that is is a matter of debate, but that you can make the argument at all matters, and we’ll be returning to this later. In my last essay (and again in the introduction here), I made an analogy to farm animals, raised without love and for slaughter. Let’s put a pin in the ‘for slaughter’ part for now and take a look at the ‘without love’ part. 

That’s right, it’s time to meet the parents.

As Andrew notes, there are significantly more compelling reasons for you to say that

They Fuck You Up, Your Mum & Dad

They really do. 

Our charming protagonists are, as with many things depicted in this game, an exaggerated, almost farcical example of this phenomenon — one that’s just grounded enough to still feel very real, just like the siblings themselves. 

The late and lamentable Mrs. Graves is just the same: originally a teen mother, hopelessly out of depth with two difficult children — even if one was good at masking it — and an unreliable, emotionally unavailable (at least to their children) partner who can’t hold down a job, ends up foisting them off on each other and doing a Parental Negligence because she simply Cannot Cope. That’s the real part. The part where she gets paid off by an organ harvesting operation to leave them to die, that’s the borderline-farcical exaggeration that throws all the nooks and crannies of her character into sharp relief.

Mrs. Graves does not have a good relationship with either of her kids. Having self-admittedly fobbed the job of raising Ashley off on her son, to the degree that they did not even celebrate her birthday as kids, both of them hold differing degrees and types of resentment for her.

For Ashley, it’s hate — perhaps not quite so clear cut as that, as it’s her that calls for the eulogy and she shows some potential signs of discomfort while cleaning up her parents’ corpses, but by and large, it’s fairly simple and straightforward, as usual for Ashley. The sentiment is not exactly unreturned, either.

This brings Ashley’s heart great delight!

The most clear incident raising her from everyday ‘neglectful’ to ‘wow she wanted nothing to do with this kid’ is the optional ‘birthday cake’ scene, obtained by finding the present in Ashley’s first ‘transitory world’ dream, in which we see Ashley’s birthday  and the founding of a lemon cupcake tradition between Leyley and Andy. She has received nothing from her family, notes that her ‘friends’ would say they were busy before she even told them the schedule and Andy takes her out to buy cupcakes with his pocket money.

This scene gets a callback in Andrew’s dream later. Just remember to Ask Nicely, rather than Kill Her.

Parents of the year, everyone.

So with Ashley it’s as straightforward and obvious as she herself is — she hates her mother, her mother hates her. With Andrew, as with Andrew himself, it’s a fair bit more complicated. His mother is a much more nuanced figure, who is believable in her role as an unfortunate teen parent who was trying her best. He has a degree of trust in her against, seemingly, his own good judgment In her conversation with Andrew, she acknowledges her fault in raising him and seemingly sincerely tries to offer him a ‘way out’, an olive branch.

I think many people have had relationships where they might say this

This scene in particular intrigues me, because she is acknowledging fault in a way that Andrew strictly avoids doing — and well, there’s nothing Andrew likes more than a good way to avoid acknowledging any fault of his own. With her dominant relationship over their father as a model for Andrew to draw comparisons to his own relationship with Ashley with, it’s no surprise that the narrative resonates with him to the point of ‘Accept’ being many people’s first completion.

Of course, that’s not all there is to it. There is a fascinating contrast with her later conversation with Ashley, where she — despite accusing Ashley of brainwashing Andrew — refers to Leyley and Andy as ‘two psychos’ and states that she always knew they were responsible for Nina’s death and that, implicitly, they owe her for not turning them in. 

There's something about mother-daughter relationships here that I just do not have the time or reading to dig into, unfortunately.

Meanwhile, when Andrew interrogates her on her possession of their death certificates, she has… an interesting, plausible story about a life insurance scam and claims that she really did think they died in the fire, implicitly denying the claim that she sold them. It’s entirely possible that she’s describing the details of the ‘scam’ correctly — you can even buy that she genuinely does care for Andrew in some way, if not Ashley, but her claim about being an honest, grieving parent shocked at their deaths… doesn’t add up?

This is a very normal reaction to your supposedly dead children showing up in your house.

As Andrew himself notes after hearing her story, she’s full of shit. This gets into speculation, because there are a few ways to read this, but the most plausible ‘gist’ is that she and her partner were paid off in money and jobs to not raise a fuss — the surgeon she mentioned is almost certainly the founder of ToxiSoda, remember?

The overwhelming difference in presentation between how she speaks to Andrew and Ashley invites investigation — and when Andrew turns down her offer and tells her he isn’t interested in her offer in Decline, her reaction isn’t… despair, it’s shock — and well, there’s a good reason for that.

Why do you think she did it in the first place?

This is the happiest we see her

Well — it’s so she can finally fit into society. That white picket fence, that idyllic 1950s life — hell you can call it the American Dream. She wants that, or as close to it as she can get — the working-class teen mother, living in poverty, aspiring to the middle-class. It’s a very common, very real and very grounded motivation.

And to that end, she effectively sold off her children. It’s no wonder she can’t fathom why Andrew wouldn’t choose the same.

That’s the part that makes you think — just like the deaths in Episode 1, well- maybe the siblings are justified here, too. It’s a weaker argument, but it’s still one you can make under many common moral paradigms today — what goes around comes around, all that jazz. Just look at how awful she was to Ashley.

She’s finally found what she’s been striving for.

Here’s the thing, here’s the thing though — what, reasonably, could she have done? Andrew and Ashley briefly highlight this in conversation about Ashley’s ‘friends’ in Episode 1 — was she supposed to fight gunmen to try and break them out? Throw food to the balcony from four stories?

Moreover, as she herself says to Andrew… would anyone really have been able to do better than her in her position? She was seventeen when Ashley was born, living in poverty with a partner who couldn’t even remember Andrew’s name when he was a kid. Anyone would have had difficulty, let alone with these kids.

Her evils are — they’re not any deliberate action, but rather… prompted inaction. She didn’t have the emotional energy, resources or plain capability to properly parent her children, she didn’t have any solutions to their murder of Nina in a state so blatantly hostile to its underclass, she didn’t have a way to connect with Ashley and she took the money rather than fight a futile and likely suicidal battle against a corporation and its armed goons in a dystopian setting.

Ashley, notably, does not deny this.

Her sin is the one we’re all, I think, guilty of — that of not trying hard enough, that of inaction in the face of difficult tasks, of not standing up on principle because it’s just too much that day and you don’t have the spoons, you’ll do it tomorrow (no you won’t). It’s a petty, everyday kind of evil — that of not doing enough. 

Is that enough to condemn her? Certainly, there’s a pretty manipulative read of her that likely has some truth to it — in the locked door in Ashley’s dream in ‘Decay’ you can discover that she has a ‘not-hatched’ tar soul — but consider that lens — the game won’t make up your mind for you, so you’ll need to choose that for yourself.

The dad is interesting in terms of negative space — but he’s mostly important in that he doesn’t matter, so I decided to not fit him in here. He has art, though — just no sprite, because, well, he’s never mattered to either sibling.

The Contract We Call Society

Right, it’s time to get a little bit Theoretical in here. Not much, but a little. Social contract theory is a complex topic with a lot of nuance, much of which I will be eliding in the name of not writing a twenty thousand word paper on semiotics, law, and anthropology, but the short analogy is… the idea that as long as you play by society’s rules, as long as you are a good citizen, a good person, the state, or the community, will take care of you.

In a number of ways, the harshest penalty levied by many historical states and legal codes was not death, but rather the criminal status of outlawry, a practice that’s cropped up a number of times in history — the practice of no longer being protected by the law. This meant one could be killed or worse with impunity — you were no longer protected by mob justice and, while overexaggerated as a term of reference, certain texts from Medieval England refer to outlaws as bearing a wolfshead, ‘for the wolf is a beast hated by all folk’. Never minding that wolves are actually delightful, this was a time when wolves were actively hunted and sold by people — and the same was intended to happen to outlaws. They were ‘fair targets’ as far as society was concerned, no longer to be treated as your fellow citizens.

This was the gravest punishment on the books, for most of these legal codes — something saved for those who had broken the social contract so completely that there could be no turning back (civil outlawry is… a bit different, that’s not the topic here). Among others, a modern critique of the concept is that it offers no incentive for improvement, no incentive to change or to cease harming society — if an outlaw has none of the social contract’s protections, what reason do they have to obey… any of the social contract? If that seems familiar, well, let me ask you this:

What if the state or community fails its end first? What responsibility does the innocent outlaw have to that contract?

It’s an interesting phrasing, that the world is better off.

It’s time to talk about the incest, and part of why it’s there. The cannibalism too, but that’s less impactful here. If you’ve seen me elsewhere, you might have seen me say that the incest is a load-bearing narrative pillar — in large part due to it being a critical facet of the siblings’ relationship, but in another large part due to it being an equally critical part of how the game uses taboo.

A taboo is in this context something that is considered repulsive and to be avoided by society. It’s a more complex term than that — you can also use it for certain sacred actions or utterances that are only permitted to certain people, for example — but that’s what it is here. Swearing, premarital sex, BDSM and murder are, approximately from weak to strong, some example taboos held in modern Anglospheric society. 

Strong taboos are a staple of horror — they shock, they disgust, they draw people’s attention and it’s that last one that’s critical here. Incest is a very strong taboo — while I am absolutely not segueing into its historical context, the very well-established Westermarck effect gives it a certain timelessness and immunity to desensitisation that most other taboos don’t have — murder, to contrast, is a taboo we’re largely desensitised to in modern media and works of modern media have to put in actual work to make a murder seem horrifying — through atmosphere, cinematography, evocative prose etc.

And this is important because the use of taboo I’m covering in this essay is that the incest is used to invite judgment — it is so ingrained as a ‘wrong thing’ in people’s brains almost regardless of background that it forces the player to engage with the work morally. And that’s where the fun starts.

I’ve mentioned before, very briefly, about the juxtaposition of tone between the Burial & Decay endings, contrasting with the very monstrous difference in morality. Burial is remarkably light-hearted — they play around with the drain blockage, they joke about their mother’s personality and this is further exaggerated on the Love path, where Andrew is much more comfortable with casual contact and the two make a game out of how far they can throw their parents’ skulls, the humour is directly contrasted against their abhorrent actions.

I’ll be real Ashley is far more merciful than I, I’m shuddering at the thought of that gunk in my hair

In comparison, Decay is… bleak. I’ve seen it being referred to as being ‘emotionally sandblasted’ and, yeah I think that’s fair — it’s uncomfortable, it’s heavy and it’s just not fun. And this is the route in which, if you chose Trust into Accept, Andrew has bought into the narrative that his mother’s offered — that he can fit just fine into society if he wasn’t stuck, if not for Ashley — the route that ‘fits’ most closely to the social contract, to Andrew feeling the guilt that we think he should and hating the monsters that they’ve become, as the social contract deems them. Given the pains the game takes to attach the player to the protagonists, this normative moral ending is very easily interpreted as the bad ending.

And well, isn’t it?

Thing is, as mentioned above, the social contract has never held up its end for them. The game takes careful pains to point out to a viewer that they’ve never had the life that society promises people, so why do its moral standards apply?

The game invites you to judge the characters, and in the same motion, asks you from what principles you judge them, making a pretty good guess in that, like most people who haven’t spent a large amount of time navel-gazing and reading some very boring books by very dusty old men, they come from the society around you.

Love even has Ashley express this sentiment directly after the incestuous dream — she asks you — well, Andrew, but this is also something for the player to mull over — why this is what’s engaged your morality or sense of revulsion, rather than the desecration, cannibalism or murder.

Andrew and Ashley are both very funny and very fascinating in this scene.

And that’s the framing that it casts all of its own moral judgement in — even the ‘tar-soul’ aspect is… well, it’s unclear what it even means. Mrs. Graves was a ‘not-hatched’ tar soul, after all. Other than that, it’s society and the world being better off without them, rather than any kind of assertion of objective morality. Due to the present of ‘soul colour’, we’ll presumably see the game make some moral statements in Episode 3, but as it stands?

It’s nearly completely morally sceptical, in and of itself — it’s not interested in moral assertions or education, it’s interested in making you question your own morals. Deconstructive (not that kind), rather than dialectic, to be mildly pretentious.

It uses taboo and shock to invite moral judgement, but then uses tone, charm and our instinct to look for the happiest end for our blorbos to get you to recognise that these are principles you yourself brought into the game, rather than any it’s handed you. 

To summarise: you’ve brought these principles in from society, but what do the siblings, the protagonists, the villains to the world, owe society? Enough that they should follow them? It failed them first, after all.

Closing Thoughts

This one is a bit less energetic than the last, tragically — my sleeping schedule is the stuff of nightmares recently, I love windy weather. Wait, no the opposite. Huge thank you to everyone who commented on the last one, you are the wind beneath my wings and the main reason I managed to get this out this week.

This essay is a bit more interpretative than my last one — certainly, there are alternative readings and I’ve been toying with the idea of deliberately taking a reading I don’t like very much and writing from that perspective as a demonstrative exercise recently — mostly that you shouldn’t just take my word for things!

Otherwise, if the last bit at the end seemed murky, I apologise — I did try to write a more detailed version, but firstly, it was three thousand words and secondly, I re-read it the next day and I could not understand what the fuck I was talking about. Personally, I blame Derrida — suffice to say that I strongly recommend playing through it with an eye towards considering culpability, morality and why you think certain characters are more or less forgivable than others, and for what deeds. See what you get out of it.

I managed to keep one particular thread open to wrap up with here —  I try to keep speculation on Episode 3 content to a minimum in the main essays, but it should be fine here — you might have noticed that I refer to Episode 1 and Episode 2 being on something of a spectrum of justifiability, with the siblings’ actions being ‘more’ justifiable in Episode 1 and ‘less’ justifiable — but still justifiable if you try — in Episode 2. 

To continue the thought of the happiest ending being the one in which they step the furthest away from common morality and to further jar the viewers’ sense of morality by contrasting societal morality and blorbo-oriented morality, Episode 3: Burial could continue this trend in having a major victim be someone who, well, has done nothing wrong and isn’t even guilty of bystander syndrome.

I wonder if there’s any good candidates, someone who’s sweet, harmless and will indisputably be an innocent victim…

…I’m sure she’ll be fine

[padfootagain]

Only An Almost (VI)

Chapter 6: Hiding

Hello!! Here is a new chapter!

I hope you’ll like this chapter! Please, tell me what you think!

*************************************

Pairing: Hozier x fem!reader, friends with benefits AU

Warning: No explicit smut or nsfw content, but there are sexual themes and heavy make-out sessions (it’s a friends with benefits AU, I can’t really escape it), so 18+ only!

Summary: Andrew has been in love with you for years, and yet he has never confessed his feelings. But a night out celebrating the engagement of his best friend changes everything. However, you don't seem ready to be with him just yet. You make him an offer that he can't refuse... but will certainly regret.

Word Count : 2387

Masterlist for the series – Hozier’s Masterlist – Main Masterlist

Andrew needed to talk to you.

After his conversation with Sam, there was no doubt left in his mind that he needed to tell you how he truly felt. This… situation, this… arrangement… it couldn’t go on. It was hurting him too much. Having you for a moment, and then being back to square one, holding himself back all the time, and this fool’s hope that you could feel the same if he waited…

He couldn’t keep on doing this. Another week and two nights with you had passed, and Andrew was now resolute. As he was knocking on your front door and then digging his hands in his pockets, he kept on repeating the words he had prepared beforehand. It was so much easier to write things down, he had sketched his speech this morning.

I know you don’t want a relationship at the moment, I understand that.

He knocked a second time as you weren’t opening the door.

But I’m not sure this… arrangement of ours is a good idea. I see you as more than just a friend. Way more than that. And I don’t think that I can keep on being casual with you.

At long last, the keys turned in the lock, and he stood a little straighter, taking a deep breath.

I get it that this is not the right time for you, and that’s alright. I’ll wait. I’ll wait all the time you need to have a proper date and a proper relationship with you. I’ll wait for you.

You opened the door.

I’ll wait for you, Y/N, if you want to give me a chance…

“Andy? Were we… had we something planned for today?”

“Hi! Erm… not exactly, but like… I haven’t seen you in a few days, I was getting worried you might have been eaten by some roaming spirit or the monster under your bed or something…”

He mentally slapped himself for such a weird and stupid joke.

You granted him an amused smile nonetheless, he was even ready to believe that you were struggling not to laugh.

“I’m alright, I’m just super busy with work.”

“You look tired.”

You looked exhausted, actually, with bags under your eyes, dishevelled hair…

“Thanks, I guess…”

He rolled his eyes.

“It’s not what I meant. You are always stunning. But you do look like you haven’t had a proper rest in a few days.”

“I have so many things to do…”

You heaved a sigh, and it was easy to see that you were buzzing with anxiety.

“Can I come in?” Andrew finally asked, but he was surprised when you hesitated.

“I have some work to do…”

“It’s Sunday afternoon, you’re not supposed to be working on Sunday.”

“Andy…”

“Do I really need to beg?”

He gave you a crooked smile, the ones he thought were almost cocky but behind which he badly hid that he was worried. You heaved a sigh and let him in.

“Tea?” you asked, although you were already grabbing the kettle by the time Andrew had rid himself of his coat.

“Thanks,” he smiled as he sat down by your table.

He waited until you were sitting with him before speaking again. He reckoned that you needed to be eased into the conversation he was aiming for, so he started with niceties.

“What has you so busy then?”

“Work. Important projects.”

“What kind?”

“Look, Andy… I appreciate the thought, but I don’t have time for this…”

“You can’t keep on working without taking a break… it’s Sunday.”

“Like you’re never working on Sundays.”

“I’m a musician, not an office employee. If I want to, I can decide not to work for an entire month, and no one is going to say a thing about it.”

“Touché…”

“Seriously, though… I’m just worried. Why don’t you take a small break with me, huh?”

“Andy, if you came to get laid, I’m not in the mood…”

“I didn’t…”

He frowned as he stared at you, offended by the thought. Your expression softened.

“Sorry. I’m a little on edge.”

“I haven’t heard from you in several days, I was just stopping by to check up on you.”

“I know… I’m sorry, that’s very nice of you, actually. I’m just so…”

“Stressed? Tired? On the verge of a nervous breakdown?”

“All of the above…”

Andrew drank a gulp of tea or two, before standing up in a jolt.

“Come on, go get changed.”

“What?”

“You need some fresh air. Some fresh air, and a nice walk. Come on. Get properly dressed, we’re leaving.”

“Andy…”

“You look like a zombie, you need a break.”

“I thought I was still stunning.”

“You are. Don’t ask me how you do it. Come on!”

You smiled, and seemed to hesitate one last time before getting up as well. You went to your tiptoes to kiss his cheek, and he bent to meet you halfway.

“Thank you, Andy. Where are we going?”

“I’ll find a nice spot, I promise.”

How could Andrew bring up this conversation?

He kept his words light and playful during the short drive to the spot he knew you would like. Some quiet path winding through the Wicklow hills, one that you knew already, but didn’t go there often. It was an easy, peaceful walk. Perfect to focus on nature, and get out of your head. It would do you good.

You were finally starting to relax, and Andrew didn’t dare to bring up the subject he so desperately needed to discuss. Partly because he didn’t want to stress you out again, partly because he was too afraid.

You joked around and spoke of unimportant but lovely things while you walked, his fingers brushing yours every once in a while, blaming the uneven terrain for the ghostly touch. But he didn’t reach out, didn’t hold onto you. He didn’t dare to.

You had brought some snacks with you, prepared while Andrew was pestering you to hurry. He decided that he would talk to you while you took a break to eat them. Yes, that sounded good…

“How often do you come here?” you asked him after a short silence.

“To this spot you mean? I don’t know… Haven’t come in a few weeks, that’s for sure.”

You giggled, and he slowed down to walk next to you again.

“You and your long legs. Wait for us mortals, would you?”

“Only if you’re nice to me.”

“I’ll give you a snack.”

“Hmm… that could work.”

“Or actually, never mind that. Go ahead and play the lure. So the beasts will attack you and spare me.”

“The beasts? What beasts? The squirrels? A bird?”

“There are badgers everywhere around here.”

“True, but I’m too skinny for their taste, I’m sure.”

“A bite-size ankle.”

“Nothing but bone, I’m afraid. Not enough sustenance. They’ll have to get to you, eventually.”

“Naughty.”

You walked further along the quiet path, laughing and joking and talking nonsense. And this was nice, unbelievably nice. There was just something about you that made Andrew’s shoulders lighter, his world brighter.

Love. It’s love.

You took a turn, came to particularly nice spot, breaking free from the trees of the forest trail. There was a clear view of the hills from there, and the valleys below.

“This is so nice. You were right, I was cooked up at home, and then at the office… I needed this. I needed some time outside, to clear my head.”

The Wicklow hills rolled before you, in various shades of green, the bluish grey of a stream running between them. You sat down together on an old stone wall, and you shared your snack with him: some slices of apple and a few biscuits.

“It’s so nice out here. We had not done that in a while, had we?” you went on, before taking a bite at the piece of apple in your hand.

The fruits were sweet and sticky with juice and sugar. The flesh had turned a little brown, oxidized by the air. Andrew hummed in agreement as he took another piece.

“Yeah, a few months, I’d say.”

“Longer than that. I don’t think we’ve done this since you’ve been back.”

“Maybe you’re right.”

He saw your gaze softening with sadness, something close to melancholy.

“How do you do it?”

Andrew frowned in response, silently asking what you meant. You looked at the landscape again as you answered.

“The touring. The constant travelling. Always being away from home. How do you do it?”

Andrew shrugged.

“It’s not as bad as it sounds. I get to do what I love, I can’t complain about it, I reckon. I’m so lucky people across the world love my music, that… total strangers on another continent can find something to relate to in my songs… It’s more than I’ve ever hoped for concerning my career. I’m very grateful for that.”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

He couldn’t refrain a small smile at that. You were always so stubborn, never letting him get away with things. He loved that about you, it was endearing.

He set his gaze on the landscape too, tracked some clouds drifting in the blue sky. The weather was so lovely this afternoon… he wondered when it would turn to rain.

“It’s tough,” he admitted. “On one hand I’m unbearably lucky. I love travelling, I’m going to places I would never have dreamt of visiting. I meet amazing people. I get to perform my songs, and people come to see me. And I would lie if I pretended that I don’t love touring. But it’s… it’s hard to be away for so long. You live out of a suitcase. You don’t have a proper bed, not to mention your own. You never sleep twice in the same place, you’re always busy, always torn in a thousand directions at once… you’re never on your own, there are constantly at least five people in the same room as you. Sleeping in a bus is hell. You’re… exhausted, all the time. Stressed because of all the things to do, stressed about the schedule, the interviews, the nerves before a show… And I miss home. I miss my parents, and my brother. I miss my friends. I miss my house, and my dog, and my bees, and just… this. I miss this place. And I miss you…”

He heaved a sigh, forcing himself to look at you again, feeling your stare upon him.

“But in the end, I love it. There’s nothing as rewarding as hearing someone else singing something I have written. There’s nothing as exhilarating as being on stage, and performing and… It feels like I was born to do that. It just feels so right. It’s the same when I write music. It just feels right.”

Slowly, you nodded, a gentle smile on your lips.

“I understand. But it sounds lonely.”

“I’m literally never on my own, that’s an issue, actually… to me it is, at least.”

“But you’re not with your family. Can you say that you’re with the people who matter most to you?”

“Some of them are.”

“What about most of us?”

He granted you a sad smile.

“Yeah… yeah, I miss all of you.”

You looked away again, and he was surprised to catch a glimpse at tears in your eyes.

“I don’t think I could do it. Not just travelling but… just… how can you be with someone if you’re never here?”

It was his turn to look away to hide rising tears. His throat tightened, his heart dropped, his chest was collapsing…

Was that why you didn’t want to be with him? Why you kept him at arm’s length?

“It can be difficult,” he nodded.

“Is that why you broke up with your ex?”

“There were a bunch of reasons. But it was one of them, yeah.”

“I… I don’t think I could handle it. Waiting for you to come back…”

“I understand.”

“Don’t get me wrong, when I proposed our… arrangement… it wasn’t because it was you. I… I genuinely don’t want to date anyone at the moment. My job is a lot. And I… I’m a little lost these days. What I’m trying to say is that… I feel lonely, sometimes. But I can’t be in a relationship right now. But if I proposed for us to remain friends, it wasn’t because I was rejecting you specifically. Do you see what I mean?”

“I think so… but I… I mean like… my career means that… if you were in a position that allowed you time and space for a relationship, you would still not choose me, right? That’s what it means.”

“I…”

But you grew quiet, and he wasn’t stupid. His vision was blurred with tears: a mix of several shades of green, a splash of blue and some grey and white. A cloud was passing.

He had come all the way here with you to talk, and he had his answer.

“You’re… you’re still okay with what we agreed on, right?”

What could he answer?

No… no, it hurts more than anything I’ve ever experienced. But I can’t lose you for good. I’m not strong enough to survive it…

“Had I been anything else but a touring musician… would you have wanted to date me?” he asked, voice deeper than usual, unbearably fragile.

You didn’t say anything; he took your answer for a no.

He was being a fool…

“I can’t think like that, Andy.”

“Why not?”

“For the same reason you can’t stay for the entire night. That we can’t have pet names. That you can’t kiss me now.”

He blinked his tears away to look at you, frowning, silently encouraging you to keep going.

“I can’t let you break my heart, Andrew.”

His lips parted at your words, he tried to wrap his mind around their meaning, blinked a few times.

It was… It was him. He was the problem. Him, and his job. The same pattern it had always been, all over again, but with you this time around.

You cleared your throat, stood up in a hurry.

“Come on, let’s finish this hike!”

He looked at you as you started to walk away, but didn’t move a muscle.

You could have loved him, and he would still stand no chance at all…

[sunshine-jesse]

Another confession post: I feel the arguments about Andrew and Ashley being equally culpable as corruptive influences on each other are unfair and/or lack perspective. Even setting aside how Decay Part 1 showcased that Andy was flatly denied and castigated by Renee if he ever tried to distance from Leyley or pushback against her brattiness until he eventually gave up completely on even the subconscious level.

Like sure, Andrew is a chronic enabler, and an argument can be made that he subtly encourages her worst quirks both intentionally (deliberately picking verbal slapfights even though he claims to despise when they bicker, early instances of egging on petty mischief) & unintentionally (his default response to her tantrums is appeasement), but he’s rarely if ever the driving force in Ashley causing serious harm. She proposes malicious courses of action entirely on her own every time. She’d be exactly the same without him there, and if her worst excesses were toned down it’d only be because she didn’t have a larger body to hide behind if she got herself into a situation that poses legitimate physical risk to her.

I’d say the story also tacitly lectures against a reading where Andrew is the root of what’s wrong with Ashley: What is the single topic of all of his constant soul-searching, the issue that the Narrator is perpetually snarking about and raking him over the coals for? Andrew’s own, internal Moral Decay; his entwined lust & desire for murderous payback against Ashley, his barely restrained contempt towards other people besides her, his unconscious love of violence and growing habit of solving all his problems through killing to make himself feel big and strong. Him fucking up Ashley by spoiling her as kids is incidental and ancillary to the condemnation the narrative incessantly screeches for over the crimes he commits by his own hand, and as you yourself point out his admission of guilt on that front is framed as more wrong-headedness and/or abused person logic from him in that moment.

The only thing Andrew did wrong (specifically on the Leyley front) is not firmly curtailing her when there was still a chance of instilling a sense of ethics in her. And if we’re gonna advocate treating Ashley with kid gloves because she’s mentally ill (despite you posting multiple times disapproval of fan-diagnoses, a stance which is officially shared by Nemlei) then I don’t think it’s right or reasonable to hold Andrew culpable for not standing firm on that course of action when basically his every formulative experience aimed to actively beat the wish to let Leyley face consequences out of his head (some of the time literally).

It's complicated. I don't know if I'd call either a corruptive influence to the other, so in that sense I'd definitely make the claim that they're equally culpable.

What I will make, however, is the claim that the two of them will corrupt themselves without the influence of the other. I'm going to speak on Andrew first because you summed up Ashley rather well here, although I still have more to add.

Both of them were deeply fucked up people for a long time. In Andrew's case, it's somewhere between heavily implied and outright stated that what Andrew loves most about Ashley is the parts of her that reassure him; that give him permission to do whatever he wants. Even before three months of isolation with Ashley, he lusts after her, feels empty without her, and has violent sexual fantasies all of his own accord. Between that and the fact that he was fucking blushing when he heard Ashley's violent calls, it seems like Ashley's abuse of him (and others) gave him what he wanted: A convenient excuse (and valid reason) to self-victimize, Ashley's attention, the chance to defend and advocate for her (fulfilling his fantasy of being a good big brother), etc.

(I use that phrasing on purpose, btw. He didn't want the abuse itself, it just filled specific emotional needs he had.)

Andrew's mindset shouldn't be too far removed from how a lot of people who have had chronically abusive relationships think, although perhaps few of them feel comfortable framing it that way. Many abuse victims- especially ones who were victims from such a young age- have a very unfortunate tendency of building their emotional needs around what abuse gives them, which is part of why it's so hard to leave.

To name an example so people HOPEFULLY don't misconstrue what I mean:

Andrew needs to feel like a good brother and putting up with Ashley's shit is good person behavior to him. Defending her from other people makes him feel like a good brother, too, given his fantasy of being her protector.

She also gives him excuses to vent his violent tendencies, all the way back to episode 1:

"That's a lot of meat."

"Though, I mean….. Is it still illegal if we didn't kill the guy?"

They were on the same page all along, and his first concern was illegality. Many such cases repeat throughout the story, leading to the narrator saying the following:

Which feeds into the whole "Ashley didn't make him be anything he wasn't already" thing.

HOWEVER.

It's frankly victim blaming to judge Andrew for not enforcing boundaries on Ashley from a young age knowing what we know (retroactively apologizing to Andrew for that one. I'm sorry, my precious blorbo, I didn't know how bad it was). It's also accurate to say that she didn't "corrupt" him so much as enable him... in the same ways he enables her, although I disagree that fighting is part of that.

But what we do know, thanks to Decay pt.1, is that Andrew setting a firm boundary is good for both of them. So, you raise another very good point here with that in mind, because it's shown that treating Ashley with kid gloves is actually the worst possible thing someone can do for her. She NEEDS to be treated like an adult, taken seriously, have her merits (and, as an extension, the threats she can pose) be acknowledged and treated with the gravity they deserve, etc etc.

Treating her with kid gloves is the opposite of what she needs, because the moment she does any of that, she starts to feel out a new dynamic, self-reflect, and maybe even change!

Anyways Deltarune came out so that's gonna consume my mind for the next week or so, toodles.

[thevaudevilledemon]

So, I'm sure all TADC fans have thought of this theory but I want to explore it a little.

Like, we know that all the characters have avatars that represent some aspect of themselves, even if we don't completely know it, we all subconsciously know it. So... how does it work out exactly?

Well, we all immediately understood Gangle as being some form of representation of Bipolar or a "Masking Individual", hence why she is the Theatre Masks, her ribbon body being directly lifted from images of the masks.

We've also gathered that Zooble has Body Dysphoria or Dysmorphia, and that is why they're the obtuse rubber goose with interchangeable parts.

Obviously, Kinger is a King Piece in Chess which works in two ways; firstly it is heavily implied that Kinger is not only the first circus member, but is also the person who created the entire Digital Circus, which makes him the most important person of the bunch, like the King is the most important piece in chess, lose your king and the game is over.

It can also be a representation of Kinger's more timid nature, as the King is the most targeted piece in Chess, which also lends credence to the idea that between him and his wife, she was the calm, collected and pants-wearing one, since the Queen is the most powerful (Ish) piece in chess.

Personally I have a different opinion on that idea, but that's a topic for another day.

Jax is very interesting because he is very clearly a new version of the "Trickster Rabbit" archetype, a character that has existed in Cherokee and Ojibwe stories and traditions, and is most recognizable in the forms of Br'er Rabbit from African-American folklore and Bugs Bunny in Modern Cinema. Jax is someone who likes to annoy, frustrate and tease others.

Ragatha is the second most interesting to me. I think most of us fell in love with Ragatha because we're all desperate for new Raggedy Ann & Andy stories she was kind and friendly. Of course, we also know now that that is very much a mask of her own, as it seems she wants to be liked and will bury her own feelings to make others like her. In essence, she is a ragdoll because ragdolls and plush toys would ideally be a comfort item for kids, and Ragatha wants to be the person others go to for comfort. Also, she really wants Pomni.

And that leaves us with Pomni... Pomni is a jester. Jesters were (according to Wikipedia) members of a household of nobleman or a monarch kept to entertain guests at a royal court. Jesters were also allowed the ability to talk and mock freely without punishment, even being able to deliver bad news to kings no one else would dare.

We could also interpret Pomni as "The Fool" a tarot card of major arcana, but I'm not too well-versed in Tarot.

It is worth noting that Jesters, although commonly linked, are not clowns, so Pomni entering the circus should not be interpreted as a sign that Kaufmo abstracted. Which makes me wonder... what is Pomni's purpose in the circus?

[lilipaz1234]

English is not my native language, sorry for the spelling mistakes.

This short story will have no more than 8 chapters.

Chapter 1

Andrew was looking at his notes. He wasn't that focused, after all, he spent most of his time with his little sister, Ashley. Honestly, he was tired. In his sixth year of elementary school, he was getting his things ready. He had "friends" whose names he was lucky to remember.

___Don't fuck with me, friend, you can't go again. It's not that far.___

___My parents won't be home in the afternoon, so I have to take care of her.___ Andrew replied to friend B as he put away his things.

It was always the same. Although he could go out occasionally, those times were few and far between.

___ You can't leave her locked in the apartment,___ said friend A. Honestly, the pre-teen doesn't know why he keeps talking to him. Maybe it's because he's the one talking to him, and he doesn't want to be so weird, even more than he already is.

___Enough, friend, you know it's not worth insisting___ friend B responds to the other who seemed to want to insist that he leave his sister locked up and that's it.

Both boys say goodbye, leaving Andrew alone in his classroom. He was looking for his pen. Honestly, he would just leave it, but his parents haven't paid him enough to buy another one for tomorrow. He looked under the tables and saw a pair of black and white shoes. He looked up a little and a girl with short hair above her shoulders was looking at him.

___ Is this yours?___ He raised his hand, showing that he had the pen.

___Yes, it is.___ He stood up so he could talk normally. She handed him the pen without asking any more. ___Thank you.___ Andrew genuinely thanks his classmate; she doesn't seem interested in extending the conversation.

___You're welcome,___ she says simply before walking out the classroom door.

Andrew puts his pen away and also leaves, obviously the girl is not there although honestly he doesn't care, he continues on his way towards the school exit where he runs into Ashley who as always with her capricious attitude grabs his arm and walks with him towards the bus stop, another boring day, another day stuck with Ashley.

The next day in the cafeteria while listening to his two friends talking, friend A said something that more or less caught his attention.

___ The new girl is pretty, right? ___ He said with a goofy smile as he looked towards the table where the new girl in his class was eating along with other classmates whose names he honestly can't remember.

"So she was new"

Andrew looked at the same girl who had found his pen, the young woman's expression was mostly serious but what friend A had said was undeniable, the girl was pretty, blue eyes, with her black dress and white t-shirt and her black shoes and arrayed stockings and the pretty white ribbon in her hair, yes, she is pretty and feminine.

___ I know, I tried to talk to her yesterday but she said she was busy and quickly left down the hall. ___ Friend B says, slightly frustrated for not being able to have a conversation with the new girl. Andrew didn't know whether to comment on how he only half-spoke with her but didn't see it as a big deal.

___ And what about you, Andrew? Do you think she's pretty too? ___

___ Well, she is pretty, ___ he comments, trying to sound interested in the conversation. ___ In fact... I talked to her a little yesterday. ___

___ Seriously, I should have stayed with you in the living room, ___ Friend B says, somewhat exaggerated.

___ How much did you talk? ___

___ Not much, I was looking for my pen and she gave it back to me. She's a pretty... calm person? ___ He was honest; he didn't want the whole conversation to focus on his little encounter with the new girl.

Friend B was going to continue the conversation, but Ashley appeared, quite angry, looking for Andrew.

___ Andy can't stand that pair of idiots anymore ___ hugged him by the neck trying to find comfort, the older brother sighed in frustration already used to this unwanted physical contact ___ you have to defend me, hit them or something ___

___ Ashley I'm not going to hit anyone and who is it this time ___ moving away from her forcing her to sit in the seat next to him.

___ yesterday a couple of new kids arrived in my classroom and they are very unbearable they keep calling me idiot, the worst thing is that the teacher sat each of them next to me ___ he spoke almost shouting she looked quite frustrated, knowing his sister she probably tried to attack them after they insulted her but if she is here throwing a tantrum in front of Andrew it is because it did not have the effect she wanted on those two boys.

Andrew sighed again, annoyed. Calling Ashley an idiot wasn't new. He's had to defend her, but honestly, he gets tired of the same old thing. He's also aware that sometimes she deserves it.

___ I'm going to try to talk to them. If that doesn't work, we'll tell them a teacher.___ Ashley pouted in resignation and crossed her arms, annoyed but at the same time satisfied that her brother would defend her and find a solution to her problem.

Friends A and B just watch the scene disgusted because even though Ashley is hurt, no one likes her.

And to increase Andrew's stress, a teacher arrives saying that Ashley has to go to the principal's office, again because her fight with the other two students caused problems and aside from insulting the teacher again, calling her a bitch.

Ashley starts arguing with the teacher in the middle of the cafeteria.

___ Your sister is very annoying, man ___ says friend A watching the scene.

___ Honestly, she earns people's rejection ___ says friend B. Andrew wants to yell at them to shut up but he holds it back, feeling a headache coming on, he gets up to buy something to drink so the angry words stuck in his throat can go away a little. While drinking water from a plastic cup, a hand reaches out near him. The hand was holding a small pill. He turned to see who it was and it was the new girl.

___ They're for headaches, don't worry, they're suitable for our age. They won't hurt as long as we don't overdo it. ___ She says calmly, showing little expression. Andrew doesn't know what to say, but when he saw that he was indeed going to have a headache, he accepted and thanked her, knowing that the problem with his sister would only get worse. He looked at Ashley, who had huddled in one place and refused to move while the teacher was frustrated at not being able to make physical contact with her. It seemed like her face was going to turn red with fury until she was smoking.

___ I understand your problem, ___ she says while looking at the same scene.

"Do you understand? I doubt it."

He laughs a little because he doesn't believe that anyone else has a life as screwed up as he does.

___ And how do you know how I feel? ___ The girl was going to answer, but two male voices entered the cafeteria.

___ Sister! Anthony wants to put all the blame on me when he also participated.___

A blond boy entered, pulling the girl, almost making her fall.

___ Traitor, you owe me for not causing you trouble after breaking the vase in the living room. ___ Another blond boy identified the other and pulled the girl's other arm.

___ SISTER! ___ both yelled as they pulled her.

___ But it's you! It's them. Andy, they're the ones who called me an idiot! ___ Ashley pointed at them from her seat, angrily.

___ Oh, but it's the idiot, ___ one of the boys said disdainfully, not caring about Ashley's opinion or anger.

___ Don't say that in front of Sofia, you fool, ___ said the other twin, scolding the other for his recklessness. Neither of them let go of the girl.

___ I'm an older sister too, ___ Sofia said with a tired voice.

Andrew watched the whole scene expectantly, no doubt still hearing Ashley's voice in the background.

Andrew and Sofia are in 6th grade. While Ashley, Anthony, and Adrien are in 4th grade.

Everything that happened with Nina has already happened, but it's still 3 years before Andrew starts dating Julia.

The picture is of the older kids.

And this is what Sofia looks like.

[theresattrpgforthat]

Are there any TTRPGs for space western campaigns?

THEME: Space Westerns, Part 2

Hello there! I have quite a few recommendations that I've mentioned in the past that I feel fit this request, so you should definitely check out the extensive bookmarks at the end of this recommendation post. Here's a few more I have yet to cover!

Ceres: The Planet that Never Sleeps, by Tidal Wave Games.

Hell of a place to be awake, too. And nowhere better to be. It's humid and sticky from the scheduled rain and it's alive in a way a lot of the system isn't. Yeah, they say all this shit about humanity's real home being Earth, but here on Ceres you can feel the future actually forming up. And it's a future not meant for you, unless you're mean and lean and ready to act without hesitation. If you don't have the cash or the connections, you better have nerves of steel and an iron will. You better be able to flow with the moment.

There's malls and concerts and shopping, and TV and convenience stores, because people live here. But what you're here for is the hustle, the catch and the chase. You're here to claw out your own piece of the future for yourself, with your own hands.

Welcome to Ceres…Try not to die.

This isn't a standalone game, but rather a supplement for See You Space Cowboy, a space western TTRPG I've mentioned in one of my previous recommendation posts. It can also be plugged into a space game of your choice, if you have a game system you're already fond of. It's got roll-tables of bounties, gear, and situations, and the game comes with a map full of vibrant locations and dangerous NPCs and factions to make the world come alive.

You can get a digital version of this supplement here.

Godslingers, by Rat Wave Game House. @ratwavekayla

Long ago the Old Gods lorded over the Fourth Galaxy, these cosmic deities held great power and made their domain amongst the stars themselves. One day they all died. Now, well over three thousand years later, on the fringes of Outward Space, desperados hold the power of the dead gods soul in revolver chambers; they are Godslingers.

Godslingers is a space fantasy western. This is a game for playing out the dangerous lives of Godslingers, cosmic cowboys wielding divine weapons whose destructive nature threatens to consume and transform them. It’s designed with multi-session play in mind but the book does suggest some modifications that could be made to suit one-shot play. The majority of players will play the titular Godslingers, while at least one other player acts as the Referee; and takes responsibility for framing scenes, playing supporting characters and making rulings and judgements.

If you want an actual cowboy in space, like Cowboy Andy in the 22nd episode of Cowboy Bebop, or perhaps a mix of fantasy, the wild west, and space, then Godslingers just might be for you. This kooky setting smashes Silver Age sci-fi comics into the weird west, with d66 roll-tables aplenty, oodles of help for GMs want to create their own adventures, and a GM-less version of the game for tables who all want to have the same kind of fun.

24XX BLUE MARS, by Kirt Dankmyer.

IN THE BLUE DESERT, FAR FROM THE DOME CITIES, COLONIAL MARSHALS KEEP THE PEACE. They're the law even now, 200 years after Mars was (barely) terraformed and Earth suddenly went dark. One year ago, Martian ruins were discovered far under the deep desert, and now you have a gold rush on your hands…

24XX games have a lot going for them: they're rules-light and easy to read, they can be picked up and played with little-to-no prep, and they're often cross-compatible with other 24XX games! The creator of Blue Mars recommends checking out 24XX-D Aftertime for inspiration and extra bits and pieces, although Aftertime uses a diceless version of the rule-set. If you like the lawlessness and violent frontier justice of the wild west, and want to transpose it onto a barren planet, you might like Blue Mars.

Interstellar Bounty Hunters, by Zadmar Games.

Several years have passed since the fall of the empire, and a newly-formed republic now attempts to restore democratic rule throughout the galaxy. But the fledgling government is still young, and remnants of the former empire continue to operate on the fringes of society, just as new criminal organizations have clawed their way up to fill the power vacuum.

These are hard and lawless times, and the bounty hunter’s guild has plenty of work available, although most of it is dangerous and unsavory. Competition for the highest-paying jobs can be fierce and bloody, however—particularly when multiple bounty hunters pursue the same target.

You are professional bounty hunters, tracking down fugitives and criminals, and bringing them back dead or alive. Most of your jobs are guild commissions, but sometimes you work directly for a client.

Interstellar Bounty Hunters is a setting add-on for Tricube Tales, the setting-neutral rpg spearheaded by Zadmar Games, great for one-shots and easy to pick up sessions. The game is small but it packs some very iconic moments from some big-name properties in its roll-tables; if you love Boba Fett, you'll probably like this game.

The Kandhara Contraband, by LunarShadow Designs.

Chasing the stars is an expensive game for an independent crew. Docking fees, fuel and repairs ensure that profits are rare. If you don't mind getting your hands dirty or are just that desperate, there are always the smuggling rings. After all, crime really does pay. Word has reached your crew about one such job - Algoth Nieminen, the head of the Jitana Syndicate, is after a ship to pick up some cargo and ship it to its final destination. It's easy money, so what's the catch?

The Kandhara Contraband is a system agnostic adventure suitable for sci-fi settings such as Firefly, Orbital Blues and Traveller. The free 'demo' files consist of the initial alpha, lacking editing or layout. The paid edition of the adventure is approximately double the size of the alpha, has been edited and includes layout.

Plenty of sci-fi games can easily slip into a space-western feel if you have the right adventure, and The Kandhara Contraband aims to be just that. It's also compatible with Orbital Blues, another Space Western game I've waxed poetic about in the past. If you like this, you might also be interested in Hopes and Dreams of the Orbital Bound, by the same creator: it's a little less action, and a little more slice-of-life.

Deep Sky Ballad, by Winged Lion Games.

Inspired by legendary settings such as Firefly, Westworld, Trigun or Cowboy Bebop, Deep Sky Ballad is a space western genre ttrpg where the characters play the members of a posse - fortune seekers more or less tightly bound to each other who share their resources and a spaceship in search of purpose or wealth. The game mechanics are based on the Blackjack System, a poker cards based system; it's the same rules system Arcana Familia ttrpg use, and give agency to the player to balance the power and accuracy of an action through what can be considered a subgame.

I love seeing game-makers incorporate blackjack and other poker mechanics into western-style games; they really pull on some of the themes of westerns and bake the vibes into the game. Deep Sky Ballad has a very specific setting written for the game, so you'll have lore, factions, organizations and NPCs to pick up and play around with, as well as an introductory adventure for GMs who like a bit of extra help getting the game started for their crew.

For Further Reading…

My Trigun Recommendation Post,

My Space Westerns Recommendation Post,

Dead Belt, by A Couple of Drakes, @drakeanddice

Scum & Villainy, by Off Guard Games,

Voidhunters, by Fox Tale Games,

See You Space Cowboy, by Tidal Wave Games

The Long Shift, by Caro Asercion.

If you like what I do and want to leave a tip, you can check out my Ko-Fi!

[stellar-constellations]

Episode 3: Decay route part one (spoilers obviously)

I feel cheated of the new TCOAAL episode

This features opinions that you may or may not agree with or care about. It also contains spoilers for episode 3 (Decay part 1) for the Coffin of Andy and Leyley. This is my honest opinions and what I interpreted.

I honestly didn't like it. I understand that it's been about a year since the last tcoaal episode, and I know that creator (or author)'s work/writing changes over time, but honestly it felt a bit... forced? I know that TCOAAL has a new developer (Kit9 Studio) and it might be their contribution that makes it feel different too. I know that Nemelei provides art, but as for the writing, I'm not sure how much she does it...

Let's start off with my baby, Andrew Graves! As my stars know, I am a huge simp for Andrew, but I'm really going to put aside my bias and try to look at him for as he is, although my judgment will obviously be altered no matter what; basic psychology y'all, your thought of Andrew is different from my thought of Andrew, same goes with Ashley.

First, this episode really does make Andrew seem a victim, especially with how bratty and annoying Ashley was this specific chapter, but really, Andrew is no victim as we all should know. it felt forced to see Andrew as a victim, having everyone turn their back against him, even Ashley who "loves" him. (Spoiler, she loves submissive Andy, not stubborn Andrew, though he has the spine of a gummy worm and ends up faltering to her).

I was pretty sick and tired of seeing basically everyone like Renee and Mr. Graves and Ashley be blamed for how Andrew turned out. All the other characters seemed to have upped their annoyingness, Renee felt like a total character change honestly. Even the dad felt unorthodox. I know that it's them in the past, but I had to step back multiple times.

I mean, fuck man, even in Ashley's vision or dream, whatever, there was doors of "knowledge" where I can only assume she was hearing Andrew being chewed out as per the "you can't even watch over your sister?" part. It's just trying so hard to make it seem like his downfall was everyone else's fault except him, but NEVER blame others for your misfortune, because you have the opportunity to change and you don't. Such as Andrew getting out of the chains but going back to the apartment to Ashley, he had an opportunity, he just didn't take it. Andrew is NOT a victim, he has made bad choices and is a bad person just like Ashley and Renee and Mr. Graves.

The demon described Andrew as a Grime Soul, while Ashley is a tar soul. Ashley's description is worse, as something, thick, pitch-black, and suffocating; while Andrew is just simple grime that can be washed away with a little bit of elbow grease, but he appears to become a "tar-to-be" soul later on, which is honestly impressive considering how sucky his life was for the last 22 years he's lived and he's just recently now recently a "tar-to-be" soul, if he kills someone that is, but he's still a Grime soul? This even shows that after all the horrendous deeds he's done, even without Ashley such as killing a child, he is still a Grime Soul? What?? That's stupid, that's just plot armor, that is literally just trying to justify Andrew and it shouldn't, not in a psychological game like this.

After Andrew killed Ashley in one of the decisions to make, he decides he wants to die too. THAT is the psychological aspect I like, him just giving up on life because he was practically conditioned at a young age from his parents to care for Ashley, live for Ashley. It's sad too, seeing as when he gives up on Ashley, he gives up on himself; but it makes sense considering realistically he'd go to jail and be lonely and--- let's just keep it to the psychological aspects, this whole game had major plot holes and character plot armor and I really don't want to go into it. NO I will, because there was god awfully a lot of plot convenience. Like I said earlier, everything felt forced. From the damn gas station being right next to a family of three? To the police there for the kid to run to? To just out of all the human realm to end back up in, you're in your shitty home town in a apartment for goodness sake (I know it's because of the cultist, but there are cultists all over the world, bitch please).

After he killed Ashley, he really seemed like a broken man. He had no hesitance killing her. He had no hesitanation killing himself as the reality sunk into him that he did what he did, and he had no regrets either, unlike Ashley.

Andrew giving himself up for Ashley throughout his life, suffering over and over again because of her. Wrong parenting btw, punishing the oldest for something the youngest did, Renee should take parenting classes or Childhood Education or psychology; anything really would be better than what she is doing.

Andrew was in college and he did try to escape Ashley, but for some ungod reason he came back (which why did he come back if he was trying to escape Ashley and his family?) and the quarantine (organ-harvesitng ring) took effect, which btw, why aren't the people who did that in jail? I mean, realistically, holding people hostage like that is false imprisonment and a crime, along with the "nurses" drawing blood for their blood types later on which is wrongfully identifying as a medical personnel, and starving them and--- AGAIN, PLOT HOLES.

I don't know if this was Nemelei's writing or the writing of the new developers, but having Andrew look at every possibility to escape Ashley is just MWAH. Like, he wants to leave, but he wants her to be safe (like when he was debating impersonating as Carl and leaving Ashley with the demon so he could be free from, her JUST UGH, I like that part).

I need to hug Andrew so bad after this episode (the scene of Andrew getting drunk and kissing Ashley made me mad, IT SHOULD’VE BEEN ME, but glad he came to his senses, semi-came-to-his-senses...). Please notice how every time (err, most of the time) he has sexual innuendoes or fucks her is because he or she is drunk. Everybody, please also realize that if someone is drunk, it doesn't matter, because you legally cannot consent when drunk due to it impairing the cerebellum and hippocampus, both used in thought-processing, muscle movement, and speech. YOU CANNOT CONSENT WHEN DRUNK, IT DOESN'T MATTER IF A DRUNK PERSON SAY IT'S OKAY! Notice how he immediately regretted it after? This is why drunk people cannot consent. Out of everything to take out of the game, please understand that those under the influence, whether it is alcohol or drugs, THEY CANNOT CONSENT. Don't be a rapist y'all, because fucking an impaired person, even if they say they want it, is the easiest way to end up on the sex-offender list.

Oh, and the last 30 minutes where Andrew was just suddenly horny and shit and needed a fix? That was so unbearably forced and you literally can’t tell me otherwise. Out of the six hours of gameplay that chapter had, it just suddenly popped up all in your face in the last 30 minutes. It felt like a poor write-in to appease many sick perverts because unfortunately this game isn’t fiction to some people, they genuinely have the “any hole is a goal” mindset, which btw, rapists and necrophilliacs and pedophiles have the same mindset, so just let that sink in. I’m tired of having to support others mental illnesses because we should NOT be doing that (coming from someone with diagnosed illnesses from multiple medical professionals). I’m tired of liking things just to find the people in them repulsive. I don’t like Nemelei, but I like her work. I believe in not liking someone but at least respecting their hardwork and dedication; however, TCOAAL has unknowingly (or god forbid, knowingly) created a safe space for the scum of humans to mingle and connect with one another because Nemelei has egged and implied to support incestous acts and such thanks to this post:

She was egging the internet (and we know how scary the internet is), so of course they were going to pull an Internet and try to dox her. This is why you need to specify your motives and explain how you don’t fucking support crimes and immoral acts; once you allow one to slip under the radar, you allow all to. Make your boundaries clear, watch the fandom you created and monitor it, don’t let harmful bacteria grow into something more than an infection. But like, 80% of the fandom is pro-shipping. Like, “yay, go Andrew! Kiss the oversized sperm that shot out from your father’s cock and through the womb and vagina of your own mother, go Andrew 🥰🥰” (I say with 1000% sarcasm).

I need to stop my rant. Let’s get back to the more cheery stuff. Alas, I don't want to fix him. Give me him with all his problems. I can guarantee that some homecooked food (that has no human) and some damn cuddles in a soft bed is all he literally needs to be fixed (so long as Ashley is gone, because ngl I could see why he was so fed up with her, especially in this chapter).

ANYWAYS, enough of me ranting…

(Why is she kinda pretty like this...? AYO? TELL ME IM NOT THE ONLY ONE HERE)

I honestly don't have much to say for Ashley or any of the other characters considering this episode focused pretty heavily on Andrew, but I'll try my best.

Okay, so we all know of Ashley's abandonment problem. Even though in the demon-in-between realm Ashley refused to kill Andrew because of the vision, but secretly I think it's because she doesn't want to be alone (as everyone knows). Visions aren't 100% accurate in TCOAAL, you're able to change them if you choose the correct answer, such as killing the hitman instead of the hitman killing them?

The demon is honestly ridiculous, plot armor at its finest. I mean, demons would never entertain humans, especially with how much bullshit and demands Ashley gives the demon. A real demon would've just killed her and find someone else to make a contract with, because cults are such a rage in modern-media (oooh, satanic goth mommies with big tits and shit, yeah okay, we get it everyone. Get it, cause sex funny? Grow up).

Demons are tricksters, there isn't no negotiating with a demon unless they gain something. So it felt completely out of character having Ashley argue and bribe with a demon when a demon would slash her head off clean just for a little lip, but go plot-armor!

Not only that, but anyone notice how much more annoying Ashley was this chapter? How many fights she instigated with Andrew to where Andrew constantly was hitting her? Andrew never hit her in the other chapters, so what the fuck?! But okay, anything to keep the plot moving I guess... (I say sarcastically). But seriously, Renee really should have been punishing Ashley for her shit instead of Andrew, because if I was her mother, I would’ve whooped some sense into her (no guys, hitting your kids isn’t fucking child abuse so long as there is no bruises, it’s called discipline, don’t even talk with me about child abuse, trust me I know it).

Love how all the theories of Ashley being afraid of abandonment and viewing sex as transactional to make Andrew stay with her was true, because I agreed with it too. Ashley doesn't care about Andrew, she wants what she wants, and she didn't want to be alone, she wanted Andy who would listen to her and do what she wanted; not what he wanted.

Oh, you must think I’m forgetting something right, NO! Ashley raping Andrew? NAH FAM! I REMEMBER! It doesn’t matter what you think, a woman can rape a man too. Ashley did it cause she was under the impression that Andrew needed sex, and even though she didn’t feel any arousal and neither did he, she practically raped him to try and keep him with her. Please remember y’all, if they say no, IT’S A NO, and if they say yes but their body language says otherwise, they might feel pressured and it’ll be A NO. Just cause someone says yes doesn’t mean they consent, and if you think that’s dumb or can’t understand why, go on YouTube and watch those consent videos we had to watch during Freshmen year in high school. You may be wondering why I say she raped him; it’s because he was drunk, and drunk people cannot consent (as I said before)!

I was pretty sick of her this chapter (as I've said plenty of times). This wasn't my Ashley. They messed up her character. We're like what, 16 hours into this game and she's suddenly a different character? #NotMyAshley. No, actually. #NotMyTCOAAL.

Fuck this new chapter.

(I need her)

I just wanted to say, the snippet of Julia sounding cheerier in her voicemail pierced by heart, cause she's happier without Andrew neglecting her for Ashley and Ashley not yelling at her and threatening to murder her. YES JULIA, you go queen, you deserve better. Do what no TCOAAL fan can do and fix your mental health!

Julia getting help and a therapist is exactly what the Graves siblings' need. And fucking no, not couple's therapy, they need psychiatrists and therapists separately, stfu pro-shippers (this isn't a pro-ship blog, as are the other like 3 TCOAAL fans are on Tumblr. Sorry, block me if you don't agree because I block pro-shippers too, I don't got time for these games or arguments).

I don't have much for her because it was only like 5 minutes of her, but I'm happy to see her doing well!

The SHOT-AND-SUCH ending seemed like a bad ending honestly, as seen with them both sad, Andrew beating Ashley, Ashely fighting with Andrew and constantly threatening his life with the gun

I hope that there's an ending where they split ways and end up happy, because they both need to grow up and grow as individuals, not as a pair; but I honestly don't see it... I think this might've been our happy ending as much as I hate to say it, because I don't think there's going to be an ending where they're both happy; only one happy while the other is dead, and I honestly don't know who it'd be because Ashley won't kill Andrew, and Andrew will kill himself after killing Ashley...

There you have it, my raw, unfiltered opinion. I kept my incest views out of this, as I don't support pro-ship or incest, but I have a whole essay on why if you want to bother reading that: https://www.tumblr.com/stellar-constellations/769245017223069696/nemleis-december-2024-devlog?source=share

Oh, and I'm an Andrew x Reader blog too. If you're interested in reading my long and continuing masterlist of Andrew, click this! https://www.tumblr.com/stellar-constellations/743073859210706944/andrew-graves-masterlist?source=share

I had a bet with my friends that Andrew was an English degree, and I KNEW IT! I KNEW MY BABY WAS ONE!

Yeah, this chapter sucked. Not looking forward to the next one honestly...

Please remember, this is my opinion. Just because I think something sucks, doesn't mean it actually is bad, it's just not what I enjoy or my cup of tea is all.

[bigtreefest]

Chapter 8: Golden Hour

From: You Catch More Bees With Honey Series

Pairing: Mob! Bucky x Farmer! Reader

Summary: The sun sets on Bucky’s last week of the deal to work on your farm

Word count: 2,138

Content/warnings: kissing, cuddling, shaky voices aka holding back crying and emotions, avoiding a sensitive topic, drinking, pet name usage

Author’s Note: Although this chapter is kinda sad, I think it’s sweet to see how much they care for each other. You can really tell neither is looking forward to the separation but they’re both too stubborn to say something about it.

This is a shorter chapter, too, but I hope you enjoy! I’d love to hear your feedback!

Dividers by @firefly-graphics

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Bucky stayed on the phone with Andy for the better part of an hour to make sure he had all of the information. According to Barber, since the cow was given to you ‘in good faith,’ legally, you could keep it without being considered as in debt to Cole. That was a relief, and throughout the weekend, Bucky was being…well, Bucky. His normal controlling self, or at least as much as he could be while still under your roof.

All you wanted to do was enjoy your midday snack on Sunday afternoon before heading back out to do some minor maintenance work when he gave you an update.

“I’ve already gotten Jensen to set up an appointment with a vet who can scan it for chips or any nefarious devices to make sure we’re not being tracked or listened to.”

You stoped midway through biting your granola bar, gesturing with it out to the side of your house where the cow had been staying in surprise.

“Jensen? My ex, Jensen? You’re really working together? I thought you hated him. Fixing the cave wasn’t a one-and-done?”

Bucky shrugged as he looked through your cabinets for something to satisfy his cravings, already half-tired from starting to repair a shed with you and finding schematics for a porch swing. “Well, I technically do hate him, and it’s more like he’s working for me than us working together, but I saw how he’d give up anything to help you, and someone with that quality is worth keeping around.”

He finally settled on a cheese stick and a couple crackers before turning to face you. “Plus, the fact that somehow you don’t hate him helps a little, but I’m still gonna keep him in check.”

You smiled and nodded, throwing away your wrapper and going for another sip out of your water bottle. “Hm, I see. I hope that new training you sent him through will prove useful for the future. Seal his loose lips right up.”

Bucky stopped mid-chew, afraid to look at the knowing smirk on your face. You really were too perceptive for his own good. “Um, yeah. Be a shame to waste it on someone we don’t plan on using. Now hurry up and finish that water bottle. Gotta make sure you’ve got enough energy to finish the repairs on that shed this afternoon so your little cow has a place to lay her head outside. Plus, Curtis is coming over later to help me with a surprise and I’ve gotta make sure I’m ready for him.”

“I wouldn’t be worried about my energy, cowboy. Hope you can keep up.” And with a wink, you polished off your water and walked toward the door to slip on your boots and get back to work.

After a mostly restful weekend, you woke up bright-eyed and bushy-tailed on Monday morning, the last of the month, the last of- no. You didn’t want to think about that. Instead, you took this early hour as a chance to be productive before you had to get Bucky up. A chance to fill your mind with anything but that thought. You figured you’d get a jump on gathering the eggs. You had time to make a breakfast casserole, that could be good. And then do the crossword from yesterday you hadn’t touched? And maybe read? Really, anything to keep occupied before you had to face the music.

Before you knew it, the oven beeped to signal the end of the casserole’s bake time. You pulled it out and slipped off your oven mitts, running on the cool wooden floors in your socked feet to the staircase and going up to Bucky’s room.

You lightly knocked on the door and cracked it open to see a lump tangled up in the old comforter. As you slowly crept forward over the creaky floor, you could just barely make out the rise and fall of his body. You hated to wake him as he looked so peaceful, but it was time for work, and sleeping in any longer would just postpone the inevitable and waste your valuable time together.

You took a seat on the edge of the bed and rubbed his shoulder gently. “Jamie, rise and shine. Time to get going.”

He groaned and rolled over, squinting at you through the one eye he could pry open.

“Hmmmm. Honey, didn’t I earn an extra five minutes? I’ve been so good and done all the shit you’ve asked of me lately.”

You let out a breathy laugh at his gruff morning voice as he reached out for you, throwing his arms around your hips and shuffling to place his head in your lap. You stroked his hair, basking in the early morning moment.

“Watch your tongue, but yes, you did, and I gave it to you fifteen minutes ago, so get up and ready for the day.”

Bucky grumbled lowly against your jean-clad thigh. “Fuck off, Steve.”

You remained silent until he turned his head up to look at yours at the lack of response. Bucky’s tired eyes were met by your firm warning glance, causing him to backtrack immediately.

“Um, sorry, I, uh… I meant of course, honey, excited to start my ….” His voice began to shake. You could’ve finished the sentence for him. You knew what he was going to say. His last week on the farm. But you didn’t. You didn’t finish his sentence because you didn’t want to hear it either. You simply patted his head and nodded, your eyes slightly more watery than before. You tried to play it off as a yawn before gently lifting him from your lap and standing again.

“Yeah. That’s what I thought.” Your attempt at a snarky reply came out as a whisper, caught somewhere in your throat, where you attempted to clear it out before starting again. “Breakfast is already cooked, just cooling right now. I’ll go ahead and serve it up. I hope you’re dressed and ready, downstairs before it gets too cold.”

By the time Bucky had the chance to process your words and demeanor and nod, you had already turned around and headed back downstairs.

Besides the successful vet appointment, the rest of the days of the week were quite similar to the way Monday went, although Bucky kept getting up earlier, and pushing you to stay up later, not wanting to waste a single second with you.

The farm work went smoothly, much faster than you had recalled your first weeks with Bucky being, considering he couldn’t do a single thing without you by his side back then. The two of you still worked alongside each other, but now it made everything go twice as fast instead of creating roadblocks.

The fields were getting long enough to make hay bales, so you officially got to take Bucky up into the big green tractor and show him the way to properly weave and maneuver through the fields to cut it, turn it, and bale it. You didn’t miss the way he smirked when you told him the piece of equipment you’d be using for the job. That song, ‘Big Green Tractor,’ had played several times in the bar and it didn’t take too long for Bucky to catch on to the innuendo, but he didn’t do anything about it…yet.

For some of the other tasks, Peter came along, too, learning how everything worked. He caught on quickly, which was reassuring because you weren’t sure how things were going to be without Bucky by your side in the coming weeks. The increased speed on everything helped you to finish up earlier than usual, too, giving you most of the night for just relaxing with the two of them. Well, mainly Bucky, since Peter stayed out of the way when he could. You’d had enough time to hang out for a couple hours before dinner, then finish up the evening checks and milkings, and then go back to decompress before bed.

That gave plenty of time for you to go do something with Bucky, just the two of you outside of chores, outside of his scheduled phone calls, to just be. And then each night, after you changed into pajamas, Bucky crawled into your bed with you, his arms wrapped you in a tight embrace, holding lazy, yet deep conversation until the first one between the two of you fell asleep.

This new arrangement with no signs of Bucky returning to his old quarters allowed Peter move into the house. Sure, it may not have been that exact room in favor of one of the other guest rooms, but you insisted that now that the rest of the crew had finished up their work in the mines, there was no sense in him staying alone in the barndiminium. Especially if he was to be here for the foreseeable future.

Another night, another chance for you and Bucky to enjoy the sunset out in the rocking chairs, facing west. Except, Bucky wasn’t the biggest fan of any sort of seating with armrests that might block your closeness, so the two of you sat pressed up against each other on the front porch swing, the surprise for you that Curtis had come over to help Bucky build earlier in the week.

You weren’t all alone in these moments, though. Sure, all the people around you knew to stay away and give the two of you privacy in these times, but it was different for the farm animals. As you leaned back against Bucky’s chest, his arms around your waist and head tucked over your shoulder, satisfied yet worried thoughts filling your heads, the two of you would laugh as the sheep and cattle dogs would run up to you, accompanied by the mini highland cow that you’d decided to let Decks name the next time she visited.

The week had flown by already, full of nights like this, the two of you sitting in the glow of the golden hour that Bucky would surely miss in the city, sharing kisses and everything you could think of.

The air was just cool enough on Friday night when the sun went down to make a bonfire. Cherry had the night off for once, so Curtis had brought her over for a small picnic in one of the fields before joining the two of you by the fire.

You and Bucky had made an ice bucket of beer for the occasion, sipping lightly throughout the easy conversation, your back to his chest as his was against a log, the both of you sitting on an old quilt. Curtis and Cherry were doing the same as you got to know the girl who seemed to be stealing his heart.

“So Houston, huh? How do you feel about here?” Bucky gestured across the fire to her with his bottle.

“Yeah, kind of glad to be out of there, though. Have some time to take it slow away from the city, ya know? What about you? You’re not from around here either, right?”

You did your best to hide your wince at Cherry’s response. Sure, she was just being nice and holding genuine conversation. You couldn’t blame her for not knowing the way you and Bucky were trying to ignore any topics that even came close to his departure or what he was doing here in the first place.

Bucky was much better at hiding his true emotions, though, a product of his livelihood. “Yeah, city life has been good to me. Doesn’t mean I don’t love it out here just as much, though. I think I’ve gained a whole new perspective on this place and the people just from a month.” He gave a small smile with his response which Cherry returned with a nod before Bucky leaned forward to give you a kiss on the cheek.

“I feel that. I kind of already feel at home. But you’re not sticking around, right? Curtis told me this was one of your last nights in town.”

There it was. She said it out loud, creating a pang of pain in both your and Bucky’s chests. He cleared his throat, throwing a quick glance at his stoic pal across the fire, and Curtis seemed completely unbothered. Perhaps he wasn’t aware of how much you and Bucky cared for each other. And maybe he was right for that. As soon as Bucky left, he had to go back to his normal, busy schedule that poor Steve had been maintaining this whole time, and then some. Bucky wouldn’t have space in his schedule to come back here or worry about you for anything but business, right?

You let out a shaky breath as Bucky rubbed his hand along your side, responding just barely loud enough to overtake the crackling fire. “Yeah.”

Next >

Bonus A/N: when things heat up to be pulled apart…I’m sure there a scientific term for that (entropy?)

Series Taglist: @scuzmunkie @openup-yourmind @vicmc624 @hawkeyes-queen @blackhawkfanatic @morgthemagpie @buckybarnessimpp @calwitch @thesarcasmqueen-22 @mrsnikstan