#and i’m not really willing to go through the process of trying to explain this shit to ableists who claim having the same disorder makes

[halfricanloveyou]

“hey so we’re gonna need you to focus up and pay attention and not talk for 3 hours straight. and no you can’t look at your phone or ask brief questions or think out loud and 98% of what will be said won’t apply to you.”

“also i know you have adhd and that you said your adderall wore off but so do i. you just have to learn.”

do you seriously think i am capable of that. what if i blew you up with a cool wizard beam attack? what if the beam was purple.

[wosospacegirl]

And they were roommates - part 10

Summary: Y/n gets injured and has to stay in recovery for 8 months. It's a good thing her friend and teammate, Kyra, is more than willing to move in with her. wink wink

Warnings: (+18) SMUT. FINALLY SOME SMUT FOR THOSE TWO!! Plus, of course, Y/n getting her cast off, Kyra coming home, and Y/n finding out about Alessia and Leah.

Word count: 9.2k

Masterlist

You can read part 1 here

Part 11 here

..

“How does it feel?” Mary asked, finishing up the last of the cast removal.

Beth and Lotte sat quietly across from Y/n. Their arms crossed as they watched her carefully from the seats in the rehabilitation room.

Y/n stared down at her leg–the bad one–as she had been calling it since it broke in half almost 3 and a half months ago. The cast had been a part of her for so long, and now, with it gone, the skin underneath it felt different…foreign.

It just didn’t look like she expected. The healing process through those three months hasn’t been easy or gentle; the damage of the injury was left behind, marked on her shin.

The skin on her leg was very dry and red, a mix of scars imprinted on it– some of them from when the injury itself occurred, others from the injury.

“So, sweetheart?” Mary asked again, more gently. This time.

Y/n hesitated, almost reluctant to speak her thoughts. “It looks–” She bit her lower lip. “Ugly.”

The room was silent as the word hung in the air.

“I’m sorry?” Mary asked again, confusion evident on her face.

Lotte and Beth looked at each other, not really sure of what to say.

“I don’t like it,” Y/n said again, more firmly. “I thought… I thought it would look like my other leg.” Her voice cracked slightly, and she hated herself for it. She looked down, avoiding Mary’s gaze.

Mary didn’t say anything, slowly turning to Lotte and Beth, and silently asking for some help. Y/n needed friendly words at the moment, not medical advice. 

“I have to go to the infirmary to get some cream for your skin, but I’ll be right back,” Mary said as she headed to the door, leaving the three girls alone.

Lotte, noticing Y/n’s frustration, carefully slid onto the bed next to her, wrapping her arms around Y/n’s shoulder.

“Your leg’s been through a lot, baby,” Lotte said softly. “It broke in half, it tore your skin, your muscles–”

“It was a very traumatic injury to your body,” Beth finished Lotte’s sentence. “Scars are good, it means your body was able to heal properly.”

“You’re gonna get used to it,” Lotte smiled.

Y/n blinked a few times at the two girls, feeling grateful that they were trying to make her feel better, but unfortunately, the overwhelming wave of disappointment and frustration was stronger. 

She imagined the day she was going to get her cats off was going to be different.

She thought the skin underneath the cast would be completely healed, but she didn’t expect the stiffness that came when she tried to move her leg; she didn’t expect the big scar that began on her ankle and grew all the way to her knee.

She’d also thought  Kyra would be here with her. She’d imagined sharing this milestone with her, Leah and Alessia. Y/n loved Beth and Lotte to pieces, and she appreciated all the things they had done for her, but it still felt like important people were missing from this moment in her life.

Beth, sensing Y/n’s discontented attitude, placed a hand on her thigh and got down on her knees in front of her, looking closer at her leg. 

“I get it, she said softly.” She touched the side of Y/n’s knee on two spots, right to the left side of the patella, on the anterior cruciate ligament– ACL. “It’s not easy seeing yourself change like this.”

“But trust me, you aren’t alone–me, Viv, Leah, and Vic, we all went through it,” Beth explained in a tender voice. “The side of  our knee is all patched up, the skin around it’s all rough, just like your shin.”

Y/n’s eyes flicked up to Beth, grateful but still feeling the sting of the reality set in. She looked down at her leg, tracing her fingers gently over the scar that ran from her ankle all the way up to her knee.

“Leah got the worst of our scars because her surgery was more complicated and took longer,” Beth noticed the way Y/n’s gaze lingered on the scar, her voice softening as she continued. “But we didn’t have to wear any casts, so we just watched our scar and our legs heal little by little.

“You, on the other hand,” Beth said, gently touching the skin of Y/n’s healed scar. “Had your leg hide from your view, so you didn’t get to see it getting better day by day. You only just took the cats off.”

Lotte, sensing Y/n’s unease, added with a gentle smile, “You’re not used to it yet. It’s a lot all at once. The cast is off, and now you can move more freely, but you’ve got these new scars to accompany you. It’s a lot of change in a short time.”

“I’m scared that–” Y/n had a hard time processing her words. “If the outside looks like that, then maybe I’m not completely healed on the inside too.”

“You don’t have to worry about that, sweetheart,” Mary said while walking into the room.

Y/n squinted her eyes at her, she was a hundred percent sure Mary was listening to their conversation all along.

“Your scar is a bit rough given the nature of your injury, but it doesn’t look swollen or have any indication that you won’t heal properly.” Mary got closer to Y/n, and Beth and Lotte went back to their previous seats.

Mary touched Y/n’s shin, pressing it and lifting it off the ground. “Does it hurt when I do that?”

“No,” Y/n shook her head. “It just feels very stiff, and it's kind of uncomfortable, but it doesn't hurt.”

“Yeah, that’s expected,” Mary said, tapping Y/m’s tights. “You’ll be back on the pitch in no time. Don’t let a little scar get in the middle of that, okay? I’ve treated a lot of athletes with broken bones, and most of them had a really good recovery.”

That gave Y/n a little hope. She smiled at Mary, watching her leg as she slowly moved it. Taking the cast off was one more step into her recovery; it might not be the scenery Y/n expected, but she was grateful for it overall.

Mary went to the cupboard on the other side of the room and came back with a grey shin brace. “You’re free from the cats, but this,” she pointed at the brace. “It’s going to be your new friend.”

Y/n groaned. “Bloody hell, I really thought I was a free woman now.”

Both Leah and Beth laughed at Y/n’s joke, feeling at ease that the girl didn’t seem so sad now.

“You can take it off to shower and bathe only, ok?”  Mary got on her knees and put the shin brace on Y/n. “It is way more flexible and light than the cast, so you can move around and walk with your crutch all you want.”

“But I can’t have you bending your knee or putting pressure on it, alright?” Mary thighed the shin brace around Y/n’s leg, making sure it wouldn’t be loose. “And, for the love of God, don’t walk on your own, we’re keeping your crutches for a reason.”

“Do I have to wear both crutches, though?” Y/n asked. “And can I stand on my own? Or do I have to use my crutches for that too? I just–I really miss cooking,” she confessed, a slight blush on her cheeks.

“You can just wear one,” Mary said, getting up and taking a final look at Y/n. “You can stand, just try not to be up for long periods of time, we don’t want too much pressure on your leg just yet.”

“Alright,” Y/n said, looking down at her leg, now with the shin brace on, she moved it side to side, tasting the water. “Yeah, it's way better than the cast.”

Mary gave her the last bits of instructions and medical advice before telling her to come back the next day for her first session of physiotherapy without the cast.

Beth was a sweetheart as always and dropped Y/n off at her place. Y/n promised to bake a cake for her as a ‘thank you’.

Y/n waved at Mrs Petunia from her front door before heading inside her house, Footy was meowing exasperatedly as soon as he heard Y/n’s keychain. 

Y/n couldn't pet him down because of the crutches, but made sure to fill his bowl with food before laying her down on the sofa and stretching her leg into a pillow.

She took her phone and quickly zoomed in on Footy before taking the picture and sending it to Kyra. ‘Son if fed’ she wrote. Kyra wouldn't reply to her until later, because, if Y/n remembered her schedule correctly, she was in a tactical meeting with her manager.

Y/n looked around the room, thinking of what she should do next. Watching TV? Too boring; reading a book? She already read all the ones she had in the house; cooking? Hmm, maybe later.

She watched her leg, moving it to the side again, making sure she still had the ability. Y/n wanted to share this moment with Kyra, but she also wanted it to be a surprise for her when she came back. Y/n still needed to tell someone about it, though… who was the chosen one? 

Leah.

Y/n looked at the clock. Leah was definitely out of training by now, most likely in her room getting ready for bed–that meant playing Sudoku.

She clicked on the FaceTime app before and stared at her face, waiting for Leah to pick up. In less than a few seconds, Leah1s face was on the screen, but she looked…anxious?

“What happened?” Leah asked, Y/n could barely see her face or where she was, the lighting was horrible, and Leah was holding the camera weirdly close to her face; Y/n couldn’t see the background. “Why are you calling?”

Okay, that was too harsh even for Leah. Something was going on.

"Uh... hi to you too," Y/n muttered. "Are you busy or something?"

"No," Leah said quickly–too quickly. "Just... What's going on? Why are you calling?"

"Wow, okay." Y/n huffed. "Nice to know you care."

Leah sighed heavily. "I'm just–” she cut herself off, glancing to the side for a second before snapping her eyes back to the screen. "–sorry, never mind. What's up?"

"I got my cast off today." Y/n frowned and said hesitantly.

"That's good," Leah said, her voice clipped.

"Yeah," Y/n agreed, feeling a little deflated. "It... doesn’t look great, though."

"What do you mean?" Leah asked, still sounding rushed.

"It’s all red and stiff, and the scar is huge. I don’t know, I just thought it would look... better." Y/n paused, noticing Leah glance to the side again. "Hm, are you listening to me?"

"Yes, I’m listening," Leah snapped, her frustration bubbling over. "I just–look, your leg is fine. That’s what happens when you get injured. It’s not gonna look pretty, but you’ll be back on the pitch soon enough."

"Yeah, thanks for the heartfelt support," Y/n shot back, sarcasm heavy in her voice. "I knew I could count on you for comfort."

"I’m just being realistic," Leah said sharply. Her eyes flicked away from the screen again, and Y/n caught the shadow of movement behind her.

"Okay, what’s going on?" Y/n asked suspiciously. "You’re acting weird."

"I’m not acting weird."

"You’re literally refusing to look at me and snapping like I just insulted your mum, or something.” Y/n shot back. “You can talk to me, you know?”

"I’m just– " Leah cut herself off with an irritated groan. "Look, I'm sorry, alright? I didn’t mean to be short with you. I'm just... distracted."

"Distracted by what?" Y/n pressed.

Leah’s eyes flicked sideways again. "Nothing."

"You're a terrible liar," Y/n muttered.

"I am not!" Leah protested, her face reddening.

"You are," Y/n said smugly. "And whatever’s going on over there–it’s weird."

"It's not weird," Leah insisted.

"You're holding your phone like it's a security camera, Leah. I can’t even see half your face, mate,” Y/n said. “Look, I can call later if you want? Or maybe tomorrow?”

Just then, Y/n caught a muffled voice from behind Leah’s screen– “Tell her I have the perfect cream for the scar, baby, it’ll work wonders…”

Leah stiffened, her eyes flicking nervously to the side. 

"Oh fuck…" Leah turned the camera to the side quickly, just as Y/n leaned in closer to the screen, her brow furrowed in complete confusion.

"Wait a second," Y/n said, squinting. "Is that... Alessia?"

Leah's gaze darted to the side again, her face turning an unattractive shade of pink. "What? No! You didn’t hear anything." Her voice was quick and defensive.

"Oh, I definitely heard Lessie," Y/n said, crossing her arms. "She even mentioned my scar, which–" Y/n paused, her eyes narrowing. 

"–wait a minute. I did see that story Alessia posted the other day,” Y/n said, mouth open as she had an eureka moment.

 “I thought you guys were on a date, but then I thought I was going crazy because…how the hell would you two be dating?” Y/n continued, everything finally making sense in her head: The story, Leah’s weird attitude, the way Less and Leah were always together and bickering like an old couple.

Leah’s eyes widened, and she quickly cleared her throat, her voice low.

"You’re imagining things, Y/n. It’s just—" She cut herself off, her frustration bubbling over, and then, she gave up, one hand coming to hold the bridge of her nose as the other one held her phone.

 "I didn’t want to tell you yet, alright?” Leah continued, cranky. “Happy now?" 

Y/n raised an eyebrow, her grin widening. "So you are dating." She leaned closer to the screen, amusement in her eyes. "And you're being all weird about it because Alessia’s there…look at you, Williamson, all cute and nervous.”

Leah’s face turned an even deeper shade of red, and she bit her lip, eyes flicking away, clearly embarrassed. "It’s... not what you think," she mumbled, looking guilty.

“I think it’s exactly what I think, actually.” Y/n leaned back into the sofa, grinning now that she was fully enjoying the moment.

Leah didn’t say anything, but Y/n could see her jaw tighten, like she was already regretting answering the call.

“Don’t worry, I totally get it,” Y/n continued, tapping a thoughtful finger against her chin. “If Kyra and I were on the same national team, we’d definitely be roomies. One hundred percent. No doubt.”

“In fact,” she added, voice dripping with faux innocence, “I’m just waiting until I get better so we can have a proper sleepover—me, Kyra, you, and Less! Oh, it’ll be adorable.”

Leah rolled her eyes, but Y/n wasn’t done.

“Shut up,” Leah grumbled, but instead of arguing, she tilted the camera away from her face…revealing Alessia sitting beside her.

Alessia, who was already smiling.

Leah, who had an arm casually slung around her.

“Oh, that’s so cute!” Y/n beamed, waving at the screen. “Hi, Lessie!”

 Alessia laughed, leaning into Leah like this whole thing was hilarious. “Hey, Y/n,” she said brightly.

Leah huffed, clearly defeated, as Y/n grinned at them both.

Oh yeah. This was definitely exactly what she thought.

Y/n saw the screen shaking before, only Alessia's face was on the screen, the happiness on her face a clear contrast to Leah’s crumpy one. “I heard you got your cast taken off! I’m so happy for you!”

“Yeah, baby. Thank you,” Y/n said, picking up a pillow that had fallen on the floor and putting it behind her back. “I’m just with a shin brace now, but it’s way better than the cast.”

"You’re already looking way better! The brace is nothing compared to that cast. You’re gonna be back on the pitch in no time, baby,” Alessia smiled.

“Yeah, Mary told me–”

Alessia’s face was replaced by Leah, who had a clear frown on her face.

“Give me Lessie back,” Y/n said flatly. “Don't want you.”

Leah rolled her eyes. “You literally called me to talk about the cast removal.”

“And now I know to never call again!” Y/n shot back, half-teasing. “You’re grumpy, I’m not even as cranky as you are. Don’t know how you pulled such a sweetheart like Alessia.

“The same way you, the disciplined one, pulled the prankster of the team,” Leah smirked. 

Y/n grinned, resting her head on the pillow, eyes glinting with mischief. "I guess we all have our types."

“But seriously,” Leah said, her tone softening. “I’m very happy that you got that thing taken off. Just a few more months until we have you running again.”

Y/n nodded, a playful glint in her eyes. “Yeah, enjoy while you can. When I get back, you won’t be the fastest on the team anymore.”

Leah chuckled. “Oh, we’ll see about that.”

..

When Y/n woke up on the last day, she followed her routine, but this time, she realised her life from now on was going to be way easier because as soon as she stepped on the floor, she didn’t have to carry the weight of the cast all the way to the bathroom.

Instead, she grabbed her crutches, moving slowly but much faster than when she had been in the cast.

As she stepped into the shower, she took off her shin brace with a sigh of relief. No more fussing with that annoying plastic wrap to keep the cast dry!

If yesterday she had been disappointed by how her leg looked, today she felt like kissing her calf for how much better–and easy–it was to do life without the cast.

For the first time in weeks, Y/n was actually able to cook herself a full recipe–she chose pancakes! It wasn’t as difficult as before; she could easily balance herself while flipping the batter, feeling happy by the accomplishment.

She had to hide all of her excitement from Kyra- she still didn’t want the girl to know about it– when she facetimed her hours later.

“You look weird…” Kyra said, squinting her eyes and getting comically close to the camera. “What's wrong? Did something happen to Footy?”

Y/n rolled her eyes and turned the camera to the little black cat who was still sleeping curled on the loveseat by the window. “He’s fine, come on!”

“Then what is it?” Kyra pressed, raising an eyebrow as she brought a mug to her lips, drinking what Y/n thought to be coffee.

“Nothing!” Y/n said defensively, “What makes you think there’s something wrong?”

Kyra narrowed her eyes, clearly not buying it. “I don't know, you just keep… showing your teeth for no reason–”

“That's called a smile, bro,” Y/n shot back, looking at Kyra emotionless.

“Yeah, but you never smiled this casually.” Kyra tilted her head, clearly intrigued.

“I’m just happy!”

Kyra’s gaze softened, but did not lose its suspicion. “Yeah…why?”

Y/n hesitated for a second before shrugging. “Can’t I just be happy?”

“Not when you’re hiding something,” Kyra leaned back into her chair, folding her arms. “Which you clearly are.”

“Ky! Please,” Y/n said, trying to think about some dumb reason to lie about, something that would actually make her happy. Something Kyra would totally believe.

“I just–” Y/n looked to her side, eyes lighting as she saw the perfect reason right in front of her. “I found a really good brand of peanut butter when I went grocery shopping with Lotte yesterday…down that little corner store I told you about.”

Kyra blinked, her expression deadpan. “Peanut butter?”

“Yeah! It’s life-changing, I swear!” Y/n said, her excitement growing, as she made up the biggest lie ever. “It’s smooth, creamy–not chunky. You know I hate when they’re chunky.”

Kyra stared at her before, brows still furrowed, “Really? That’s what’s making you so happy? Peanut butter”

Honestly, both girls had said peanut butter so many times that it was losing its meaning.

“Yes,” Y/n said, confident in her voice. “And…It’s also organic!” She added dramatically.

“Organic?” Kyra raised an eyebrow. “Aren’t all peanut butter organic?”

“No, Ky,” Y/n said, shaking her head as if she was ready to lecture a class. “Not all of them! This one doesn't have all those weird additives–it's pure peanut butter–just peanuts and palm oil. The label says the oil is ‘ethically sourced’, too.

“Ethically sourced peanut butter? What does that even mean?”

“It’s like peanut butter that is made with conscience,” Y/ns said seriously, without missing a beat. “They are processed while following rigorous environmental laws.”

“And since when did peanuts–” Kyra started, but then paused before shaking her head, “You know what? I’m just happy you‘re happy.”

They chatted a bit before Kyra had to go to training. They had only one more game to play before Kyra would go home. 

If they lost to the USA, they would be placed second, and of course, the Matildas didn’t want that.

..

After a few more days, the SheBelieve cup had come to an end. The Matildas had beaten Colombia and Japan throughout the last two weeks, but they ended up losing to the United States team, which made them runners-up.

Kyra videochatted Y/n after the loss, clearly upset, but after a few hours talking with Y/n and her teammates, she calmed down and was able to smile a bit.

After two whole weeks without Kyra, she was finally coming home in less than an hour.

If Y/n could bounce on her feet, she would be doing that now, her eyes glued to the clock in the kitchen. She tried to tell herself she wasn’t nervous–but she was, and Y/n didn’t understand the reason why.

She was happy that Kyra was coming back home, thrilled even, but that feeling was mixed with something heavier–anxiety, maybe? Fear that Kyra would look at the missing cast on her legs and…not like her anymore.

Why would Kyra not like Y/n now that she didn’t have the cast on? No clue, Y/n couldn’t even think of a good reason, but that didn’t ease her nervousness. It’s been two weeks, and Y/n was scared that something was going to change between her and Kyra.

She and Kyra had only been together for the period Y/n had the cast on. Would things in her relationship change much? Would they change at all? Would their routine change? 

There were a lot of questions running through her mind at the same time, and the noise of the clock’s hand moving was making her even more anxious. 

Y/n sat on the table, smoothing down her shirt for what felt like the ninth time, her gaze flicking from the clock, to the door, to the table set in front of her.

Y/n had tried to do something different. She wasn’t very good at expressing how she felt with words, so she tried to do it with actions.

She had set the table hours ago–impatient much? Lit candles were sitting right in the middle of the table; all the lights in the dining room were turned off, and the only source of lighting came from the candles.

She had made pasta, it was easy, she didn't have to stand up for long, and it was one of Kyra's favorite dishes, so it just felt right. 

Y/n had also bought wine. She actually didn’t drink alcohol–scared that the alcohol could lower her performance in the long run somehow–but today she would allow herself that.

She stared at the bottle of ‘Priorat’ sitting right beside the candle. It was a type of red wine made out of black cherries. She had bought it from a vintner, and he had said it had a tannic flavour to it. 

Y/n wasn't sure what tannic was or what it tasted like.

She just hoped Kyra liked it.

Kyras was coming home. After two whole weeks without her, she was coming home. 

She texted Y/n 5 minutes ago letting her know she had just got into a taxi at the airport and was on her way home. It would probably take 20 minutes before Kyra arrived.

Y/n looked down at her leg and tried to flex her ankle, like she had been doing every day since she removed the cast, just to feel the freedom of movement. It didn’t hurt–not really, but the lingering stiffness was still there.

Mary had told her it would feel like that for a good whole month, even with physiotherapy. It was just the natural healing processes of the bones and muscle fiber, but still, she wanted to be able to walk around without her crutch soon.

The notification on her phone brought Y/n out of her thoughts. It was Kyra saying she was close.

Y/n quickly went to the mirror on the far side of the dining room, checking herself one last time. Her hair was in check and her outfit too: a green shirt and white t-shirt; something easy to take off–she had to think about after dinner too.

And just like that, Y/n heard the key on the door turning. 

Y/n turned around, quickly getting her crutch. She adjusted her grip. Tucking it snugly under her arms before moving toward the front door.

Kyra’s back was to her, her suitcase parked by the door as she fiddled with the lock.

Y/n didn't waste anything before she shifted her weight onto her good leg, planting her crutch firmly against the floor for balance. She leaned forward, wrapping her arms around Kyra from behind, pressing her face into the fabric of her hoodie. 

Y/n breathed in and out, feeling Kyra’s shampoo fill her nose. Suddenly, relief washed over her.

She missed Kyra, she missed her scent, her laugh, her smile, her hugs. 

Everything. But now she was here.

“Hey, pretty,” Kyra said, trying to turn around, but y/n held her tight. “I leave for a fortnight and you’re giving bear hugs now, what else? Let me guess, did your leg heal or–”

As if this was the cue Y/n was waiting for, she let loose of her hold on Kyra, letting the girl turn around. She watched Kyras' soft eyes, the way they squinted when she smiled.

Kyra didn’t notice her leg, not yet, being too occupied looking at her eyes and well, at her mouth.

Y/n quickly cupped Kyra's face and brought her to a kiss, her crush long forgotten on the floor somewhere, her only source of balance was Kyra. Y/n clutched one hand on Kyra's hoodie while the other was placed on the back of Kyra’s neck.

Kyra deepened the kiss, savouring Y/n. She noticed how Y/n was a bit unbalanced, so she held her hips and gently brought her closer.

“Hi,” Y/n said, breaking the kiss just to meet Kyra’s lips again.

She felt Kyra smiling against her mouth, that's how they should always be, together, kissing, just the two of them.

“Miss me much?” Kyra asked, kissing Y/n’s cheek, and then travelling to the girl's jaw, where she sucked the skins softly. 

Y/n couldn’t help but think about how much had changed in her world since Kyra came into it–the little things, like how there were no weird jokes to laugh at when Kyra wasn’t around, or how her nails looked far less neat because Kyra wasn’t there to paint them.

“Not much, no,” Y/n teased as she lifted her neck so Kyra could have more room, her lips warm and wet as they kissed Y/n’s skin.

“That’s not what you told me the numerous times we called,” Kyra murmured, placing a hand under Y/n’s shirt on her back, scratching the spot.

“Just kiss me, please,” Y/n murmured, looking up to Kyra.

“Just because you said please,” Kyra said, smiling, kissing her back, more slowly this time, trying to show through the kiss how much she hated being away from Y/n.

Playing for Australia was always an amazing experience, being on the field wearing her country's colour was a feeling Kyra could not put into words, especially when she was doing it with players she had known since she was basically a teen.

It felt good to play again after such a long time without an international break, but man, did she miss Y/n all the time she was in the US.

Kyra missed her grumpy remarks, missed having someone telling her she should eat more salad, missed having someone to brush and dry her wet hair for her, missed the massages Y/n used to do on her feet after a long day of training.

She was just happy to be home now.

After being away for two weeks, that’s what Kyra realised Y/n’s house was: her home, especially because Y/n and Footy were in it, waiting for her.

“I always knew you had a short attention span,” Y/n said, chuckling, taking her crutch back with one hand as she took a step back to better look at Kyra. “But this is getting ridiculous.”

“Ugh?” Kyra tilted her head, like a puppy who was still learning a new trick.

“Don’t you notice… anything different?” Y/n asked, lifting her eyebrows.

Kyra’s gaze drifted down her body, scanning her up and down, observing every inch of the girl. Her eyes lingered, brow furring, like she was piecing together a puzzle. Nothing caught her eye.

“Hmm,” Kyra said slowly, hesitating in her voice. “Your hair looks so nice… I love the new…cut?” 

Y/n facepalmed herself.

“Kyra, baby,” Y/n said, pointing to her leg. “Cast it off! I didn’t get a hair–”

Before Y/n could finish her sentence, Kyra had already wrapped her arms around her, lifting her off the ground and spinning her in a dizzying circle.

“What the fuck?” Kyra exclaimed against her shoulder, while still twirling her around. “Why didn't you tell me?”

“Wanted it to be a surprise,” Y/n said cheekily.

“Wow–Okay,” Kyra said at a loss for words. “It worked, I’m very surprised… When did you take it off?”

“Lika last week–”

“Last week?! You took your cast off last week and you didn’t tell me!”

“Yes! That’s how you plan a surprise.”

“Your cast is off,” Kyra said once again, in disbelief.

“Yep” Y/n smirked. “and if im not misteken you said we’ll have sex once my cast was off so pretty plese can we fuck?”

“You’re so romantic, oh my god!” Kyra said sarcastically, but swiftly cupped Y/n's cheek in a deep kiss.

“But–we, hm,” Y/n tried to say between the kisses, but Kyra wasn’t letting go of her mouth, so she gently pulled her body so she could speak.

Kyra looked at her, sad, with a pout.

“As I was trying to say, first we need to eat,” Y/n said.

“I do want to eat,” Kyra said, a grin on her face, “Let me? Please?”

Y/n felt her heart skip a beat. Kyra wasn’t normally the one to say dirty things, but she always got along when Y/n did it.

So she flushed at the sudden boldness.

“I-I mean it like real food,” Y/n said. 

Great, she stammered, guess that was her new personality right now.

“I made spaghetti–”

“spaghetti!?” Kyra said, losing all the devilish expression on her face, changing it to pure happiness. “I love spaghetti, baby!” 

Kyra hugged her again, but more softly this time.

“I know you do,” Y/n laughed as Kyra kissed her in the ticklish spot on her neck. “Now let’s go before it’s cold.”

Kyra and Y/n stepped into the dining room. Kyra stopped, and her eyes flickered around the room. The warm light of the candles made the atmosphere of the room seem cozy.

The faint scent of something garlicky lingered in the air, it was coming from the plates already set out on the table.

“Baby!” Kyra said softly, turning to Y/n. “You did all of this?”

Y/n glanced at the table–the candles flickering gently, the wine glasses way too fancy for a casual dinner. Her face heated up; maybe she had overdone it, it really looked like a lot for just a ‘welcome home diner’.

Y/n shrugged one shoulder, suddenly finding the rug on the floor very interesting. “Just didn’t want you coming home to, like, cold pizza and soda or something.”

“It looks lovely,” Kyra said, cupping Y/n’s cheeks. “You are lovely.”

Y/n felt Kyra’s lips on her forehead, and for some reason, she felt embarrassed…exposed–like Kyra was seeing something she wasn’t ready to show–a part of her that was private, intimate.

Kyra grinned. “You know I would love some pizza. But this.” She pointed at the table, “This is amazing.”

“It’s just dinner,” Y/n said quickly, adjusting a candle that didn’t need adjusting,

“Sure, just dinner?” Kyra’s grin widening, leaning over Y/n, her breath warm against Y/n’s ear. “But a romantic one, maybe?”

“Stop it,” Y/n groaned, her cheeks on fire. “It’s just pasta and…wine.” Her eyes flickered back to the table, focusing on the stupid candle. Why had she lit them? It looked like a rom-com set up right in her dining room.

“I love it,” Kyra tugged Y/n closer, holding her by her waist. “And I love how you’re blushing right now–should've got that on camera.”

“I would never let you,” Y/n warned, but her voice lacked any real threat. She was too flustered, too warm and too aware of Kyras's smile pressing against her skin.

Y/n blushed as Kyra held out a chair for her. She almost refused–hating how formal Kyra was making it–but she didn’t want to ruin things with her grumpiness right when Kyra had just gotten home. She could handle thirty minutes.

Dinner passes in a blur of teasing smiles and that old, comforting and easy conversation Y/n and Kyra were used to. 

They talked about everything that they had already talked over the phone because Kyra insisted on telling the same stories all over again, although Y/n didn’t mind hearing them, not when Kyra had that soft smile on her face the whole time.

Y/n shared about her routines, about the coffee dates with Lotte and Beth, and the video chats with Leah. How well behaved Footy was and how he had definitely not taken his well-behaved nature from Kyra.

Kyra begged Y/n to recreate that Lady and the Tramp movie scene, where both characters share one noodle, but Y/n said no grumpily, murmuring something about how each of them had a plate for a reason, all while putting hers closer to her chest.

Afterward, they ended up curled on the couch, Kyra’s arm lazily wrapped over Y/n’s waist while they shared a glass of wine.

“You don’t share food, but you share drinks?” Kyra asked as Y/n held out her glass to Kyra.

“Yes,” Y/n said stoically, feeling the warmth of the wine settling in.

“Hmm, good to know,” Kyra smiled, taking a sip. “I like it. It tastes good.”

Kyra passed the glass back to Y/n’s hands, as she took another sip, savoring it but feeling a slight tension building between them, as unspoken energy in the space.

The moment Y/n was waiting for so long was finally here.

With a confident smile, Y/n put the glass down on the coffee table and turned to Kyra, her movements slow and deliberate. She placed her hand on Kyra’s thigh as she wrapped her finger in the back of Kyra's neck, bringing her closer until their lips met.

The kiss was slow at first, Y/n was the one dictating it, turning Kyra’s face just the way she wanted while playing roughly with her tongue in a slow, but intense manner. 

Her tongue brushed against Kyra’s. Tasting the lingering acidity of the wine of both of their tongues as Kyra let out a soft, almost imperceptible moan as their kiss deepened.

Y/n’s hand shifted, boldly pulling Kyra’s even closer as she pressed her body against hers. Every inch of space between them vanished in the moment.

“I’ve been waiting for this for a long time,” Y/n murmured, placing her hand under Kyra’s shirt, feeling the softness of her skin.

“Me too,” Kyra whispered, tilting her head to the side, and Y/n kissed the side of her face slowly. “So much.”

“Did you think about me?” Y/n asked, caressing her fingers through Kyra’s back, watching as the girl shivered.

Kyra hesitated, but nodded, a blush on her face.

“I’m asking you, baby,” Y/n said, her tone sternly, but the soft touches of her hands against Kyra remained the same. “Talk to me, come on.”

“I did, a lot,” Kyra purred, the fabric of her shirt bothering her; she wanted to take it off, be free of everything standing in hers and Y/n’s way.

Y/n grinned, happy with Kyra’s response.

“I touched myself every night after I took the cast off,” Y/n confessed, tugging at the hem of Kyra’s shirt, but not taking it off. “Came a hundred times on my finger thinking about you.”

Kyra’s cheek went flush, and her eyes closed. “Y/n–fuck, the things you say–” 

Y/n smiled as she watched Kyra, her mouth slightly open, her hips moving in very slow and almost imperceptible movements. 

“Are you horny, Ky?” Y/n asked, taking her own shirt off and throwing it somewhere in the living room. 

Kyra opened her eyes at Y/n’s voice, her eyes trailing Y/n’s torso, the red bra she was wearing, how they filled it perfectly. The girl placed her hands on Y/n’s ribcage, enjoying the view in front of her.

“I-I want you,” Kyra said in a low voice, too busy watching Y/n’s tits. Kyra’s thumb softly brushing on the center of the bra, feeling Y/n’s erect nipples. “Please?”

Y/n watched Kyra up and down, Kyra’s big brown eyes watching her as if she held the world in her hands.

“Here’s what we're gonna do, baby,” Y/n said as she held Kyra’s wrists and took them off her body, ignoring the way Kyra pouted. “I’m gonna take care of you now–”

“–And then we’re going to our room,” Y/n unclipped her bra, letting it fall to the sofa before she put it to the side, just like she did with her shirt. “And you’re going to fullfill your promise of fucking me as many times as I want, alright?”

“Yes, yes, of course,” Kyra said eagerly, her eyes glued on Y/n’s breasts. They were soft and hung just the way Kyra liked them.

Y/n leaned forward and turned her body to Kyra, her good leg was crossed on the sofa while her bad leg was still, hanging over the sofa. 

She had way more mobility since she had taken the cast off, but she still needed to be careful not to get carried away. The cast always reminded her of what movements she could or couldn't do, but now, without it–with only a shin brace on–it was easy to forget about her limitations.

“Good,” Y/n said hungrily before holding her one breast in her hand.  “Now suck it.”

Kyra didn’t waste any time before wrapping her lips around Y/n's nipple, twirling her tongue around it and sucking dutifully, just like Y/n asked her too.

Kyra wasn’t expecting sex when she walked through the front door, still pretty much jetlagged. She had no clue Y/n had taken her cast off; she knew she was going to take it off sometime this month, but she didn’t know when.

As soon as Y/n showed her leg, now bare of cast, with only the grey brace on her shin, she felt a mix of emotions. The most overwhelming one was happiness.

Kyra was so proud and happy for Y/n, she was slowly going back to being who she was before the injury. She hoped that taking the cast off would get Y/n more excited. She tried to sound casual about it, but Kyra knew how much it bothered her being on the sidelines.

Although Kyra’s happiness quickly turned into something else as Y/n and she shared the bottle of wine. 

She knew the moment was coming, the moment where they would finally have sex

Kyra just didn’t expect Y/n to be so intense and, well, bossy about it. She pictured their first time having sex as something sweet and slow, with Y/n and her being a bit awkward about the whole thing. 

But it was far from the truth.

What they were sharing was intense, Y/n stern voice made Kyra want to drop to her knees at any time, but the slow breathing coming in and out of her nose while she sucked Y/n’s tit grounded Kyra, it made her relax, it was also…comforting, in some strange way.

Y/n caressed her thumb on Kyra’s cheek, watching Kyra's working on her tit while Kyra’s hand came to her other breast, massaging it and pinching the nipple.

Kyra had, so thoughtfully, put a pillow underneath Y/n so she could grind against it. The angle was a bit awkward since she could move both her legs the same, but the friction of the pillow was good enough to have her moaning, 

Y/n took Kyra’s hand and placed them on her hips. Kyra understood right away what Y/n wanted, she kept on sucking on her tit while playing with the hem of Y/n’s shorts and so gently, helped rock the girl against the pillow.

Y/n pushed Kyra’s face even closer to her chest, holding her there by the back of her neck as Kyra’s grip on her hips became sharper. Y/n could feel her finger digging into the fabric of the shorts Y/n was still wearing.

She wanted to take her fucking shorts off, it felt so good against her clit, she coulnd’t stop now. 

Y/n knew she had told Kyra she was going to take care of her, but she was going to allow herself one little orgasm, just one before they could really start.

“More, Ky,” purred, eyes closed as she felt it coming.

Kyra took her mouth off Y/n’s nipple, kissing all over her chest before pressing her chin on Y/n’s sternum and looking up to her face.

“More of what, Baby?” She asked, her grip firm on Y/n’s body, moving the girl so she could rub more against the pillow. “Tell me and I’ll do it.”

“Everything,” Y/n mumbled, starting to feel the usual warm sensation on her lower body growing. “Fuck, I-I, hmm–”

Kyra, again, obeyed Y/n. She wrapped her tongue on Y/n’s nipples again and sucked on it more intensely than before, noticing how much Y/n liked it. Her right hand was on Y/n’s back as her left hand helped Y/n ride the pillow beneath her.

Kyra felt a drop of sweet falling for Y/n’s neck and dropping slowly against Y/n’s skin. Kyra licked it, feeling the salty taste of it.

Right now, all she wanted was to watch Y/n come undone.

Kyra continued helping her move with her hands, but she placed her mouth near Y/ns ear.

“Let me take it off?” Kyra asked, tugging at the shorts.

“No,” Y/n mumbled in her usual bossy tone. “I’m almost there, ple–”

Kyra kissed Y/n deeply, twirling her tongue around, but as she got closer to being the one in control, Y/n’s hands found themself once again on Kyras face, cupping her cheeks and dictating the direction and pace of the kiss.

Y/n’s movements on the pillows got faster, and her breathing hitched as she arched her back and moaned in Kyras' mouth sweetly. They shared the same breath as Y/n came down for her orgasms, her hips still buckling.

“Ky,” she whispered against Kyra’s mouth, eyes still closed, mouth hanging slightly open. “Fuck–so good,”

Kyra kissed Y/n on the lips softly, before trailing small pecks on her forehead and then nose. Y/n had stopped moving her hips, so Kyra’s grip on her body loosened; instead of hard, her grip became comforting.

“Felt good?” Kyra whispered against Y/n’s neck, her lips leaving a heated trail down toward her collarbone, the warmth of her breath sending a wave of desire through Y/n.

Y/n didn’t respond immediately, her breath catching at the feel of Kyra's lips on her skin. Instead, she nodded, her eyes darkening with a mix of need and confidence. 

Without wasting another moment, Y/n's hands slid down to Kyra's waist, pulling at her pants, a clear sign that she wasn’t going to wait for permission. 

Kyra moved her hips so Y/n could fully take pants off, her underwear making its way to the floor alongside the other piece of clothing. Y/n didn’t waste any second before also taking her shorts and underwear too.

Now the only fabric between them was Kyra’s shirt. But Y/n decided to leave it on for now, wanting to focus on something else.

Y/n leaned over and kissed Kyra, biting Kyra’s lower lip gently, not sure if Kyra would like it if she drew blood, which was like Y/n wanted to do, so she chose the safe option.

“I’m gonna touch you,” Y/n whispered against Kyra’s mouth. “And I’m gonna fuck you until you’re whimpering.”

“I want that, please,” Kyra begged, feeling as Y/n cupped her cunt, already wet in need.

“I didn’t ask if you want it or not, love,” Y/n said, almost in a taunting tone. “I can feel how much you need me already.”

Y/n first circle her thumb around Kyra’s clit, rubbing it slowly and gently, tatsing the water to see how much Kyra could handle.

“Did you use your finger while you were away?” Y/n asked, pressinger her clit a little harder than before. “Did you play with your cunt?”

“Yes,” Kyra breathed, closing her arms and slowly moving her hips against Y/n’s thumb. “I-I touched myself in the shower.”

“Yeah?” Y/n teased while she lowered her fingers and gathered some wetness from Kyra’s hole before putting her attention back on Kyra’s clit. “What were you thinking?”

“Y-you,” Kyra mumbled, hesitant of her words. “You and me fucking and– touching each o–oh fuck.”

“Keep going,” Y/n said as she played with Kyra’s nipples, brushing them under the shorts while also making circles with her thumb against Kyra’s clit. “Where did we touch each other?”

“I don’t–it’s embarrassing.” Kyra blushed and shook her head. 

“You can say it,” Y/n took her hand off of Kyra’s cunt. “Or I’ll stop, baby, what do you want?”

“No! Please!” Kyra begged, opening her eyes and looking at Y/n. “I want you.”

Y/n pitched Kyra’s nipple harder, her hand back on her clit, now making eight figures on it. “Then go on, tell me about what you thought while you were making yourself cum.”

“You, I was thinking about you and–” Kyra moaned as Y/n fastened her pace. “We were rubbing against each other while we, hm, fuck, touched eath other’s tit.”

“Would you like that, baby?” Y/n purred against Kyra’s ears as she lifted Kyra's shirt just enough for her to put her head under it.

She latched on one of Kyra’s nipples, sucking it hard, her thumb giving Kyra’s clit all the attention.

“Can-can i cum?” Kyra asked while biting at her lower lip, almost out of breath. “I-I need it baby, hmm, please?”

Y/n gave a kiss on Kyra’s nipple before taking Kyra’s neck, suckling on the skin until it was red, until it marked.

“Yes, baby,” Y/n whispered against her skin. “Do it, let go, yeah?”

Kyra was so compliant that she did just that, cumming on the exact moment Y/n allowed her too.

Her sweet noise filled the room as Y/n helped her ride her orgasm, still moving her thumb against the girl’s clit, trying to make her savor it for as much as she could. 

“Too much,” Kyra mumbled, letting her body fall to the couch, hand on her face as she tried to get her breathing in order.

Y/n quickly cleaned her hands in one of the clothes that were on the floor before lying down by Kyr’s side, right on top of her other arm.

Y/n kissed Kyra’s arm, her shoulders and collarbone. She gently took off the hand that was covering her face, putting it to the side and watching Kyra’s face.

She looked like she just has been fucked, just the way Y/n intended.

“Stop looking at me like that,” Kyra mumbled, slight redness in her cheeks.

“But you’re so pretty,” Y/n smiled, kissing the tip of her nose. “Especially after you cum.” 

Y/n very slowly made her way to Kyra’s cunt again, it was all wet and messy, still.

Kyra held her hand before she could reach further down. “Sensitive,” she said in a whisper.

 “Thought you might want more.” Y/n kissed her lips sweetly. “I’ll be gentle, yeah?”

Kyra hesitated, but nodded, and when her body relaxed, Y/n let one finger slide inside Kyra’s wall. It went in so easily, she didn’t even have to work Kyra up to it. That’s how wet and ready she was.

She felt the warmth of Kyra’s walls snuggling her finger, and she couldn't help herself but add a second. This time it didn't slide in like the first, but Kyra’s body still welcomed it overall.

Y/n put her head down on Kyra’s arm, which was still stretched down by her side. In that position, Y/n could see Kyra reacting to each of her movements.

The way her eyes rolled when Y/n took her fingers out just to thrust them again, and again and again, in a slow, but deep rhythm.

“You’re so wet,” Y/n murmured, turning her head just to kiss Kyra’s shoulder. “Wish you could feel yourself right now, such a wet cunt you have.”

Y/n felt Kyra clutch around her.  “Oh, you like when I talk to you?” Y/n asked, moving her finger faster.

“Y-yes,” Kyra said, moving her hips to meet Y/n’s finger at the same time. “I’m close again.”

“Already, baby?” Y/n said teasing. “But I’ve barely touched you.”

Her warm walls were clutching even more now, as if ready to cum soon. Who would know her girl was so easy to cum, huh?”

“I-I know, I just–”

“You’re just very needy, right?” Y/n asked as she added yet another finger, moving the three of them as she heard Kyra moaning.

Kyra nodded while making an indecipherable sound, Y/n could only guess it was a ‘yes’. She kissed Kyra again, hand on her cheek, turning the girl’s head more to the side so she could deepen the kiss.

She was very close, her hips moved swiftly on Y/n’s finger, her hands were lying on fists by Kyra’s side. 

“I wanna see you cum again, Ky,” Y/n purred, licking Kyra’s lips as the girl moaned. “Soak my fingers, go on.”

Kyra did just that, taking her hand to her own mouth and biting it hard to muffle the sounds of her orgasms, but Y/n wasn’t having it. 

She took Kyra’s hand off her face and fastened the thrust of her fingers inside Kyra’s cunt, all while sucking Kyra’s bottom lip into her mouth.

Kyra came fast, feeling her skin prick with pleasure, her hips still rutting on Y/n’s finger, trying to make her orgasm last as long as possible.

Y/n kissed her sloppy, slowly taking her fingers off of Kyra, focusing on just kissing her mouth. 

“You felt so good,” Y/n whispered, her voice low and smug, pride curling at the edges of her words. She shifted closer, pressing her body against Kyra’s side, and kissed her sweetly on the cheek, before leaving a heated trail down towards her collarbone. “I wanna do it all over again.”

Kyra turned her head to the side, still breathless and lightheaded from the two orgasms Y/n had just pulled from her– both in a ridiculously quick succession. Her limbs were still heavy and her head foggy, but she still managed to reach for Y/n, fingers slipping lazily into her hair.

“Hmm,” Kyra hummed, her eyes falling shut as she felt Y/n’s breath warm against her skin. “Of course you do…you’re like…a menace.”

“No, I’m not,” Y/n  murmured, her lips curving against Kyra’s neck. “I’m just efficient.”

Kyra chuckled as her hands traced a lazy circle along Y/n’s waist.

“You know,” Y/n said, her voice low and teasing. “You promised me all sex in the world when I got my cast off.”

Kyra let out a breathy laugh. “I didn’t promise all sex in the world in one night.”

“Hmm,” Y/n kissed her way back to Kyra’s neck, pausing at her jawline. “Yes, you did.” Y/n made her way to Kyra’s warm, nipping at Kyra’s earlobe gently.

Kyra shifted beneath her, and a groan slipped out — but not the kind Y/n was aiming for.

“I can’t feel my legs,” Kyra murmured.

“How?” Y/n said teasingly.  “We’ve barely done anything–you are a few years younger than me, I thought your sex drive would be better.”

“My sex drive is great”, Kyra grumbled. “When I don’t have to spend nine hours crammed in a plane seat next to Steph.”

"Yeah..." Y/n said, her fingers softening against Kyra's arm. "You must be wrecked."

“I’m fine,” Kyra said through a yawn. “Just need to close my eyes for, like, two minutes.”

“So we can have more sex after?” Y/n asked smugly, “That’s still not a no.”

“It's a ‘please, let me take a nap’.”

“Fine,” Y/n muttered, flopping dramatically onto her back. “I guess I’ll just lie here…cold…unloved…”

“Bloody hell,” Kyra laughed, pulling Y/n closer and tucking her head under her chin. “You’ve gotten so dramatic while I was away.”

“You’ll learn to love it,” Y/n grinned, pressing a kiss to Kyar’s collarbone.

“Yeah,” Kyra murmured, her voice heavy with sleep. “I already do.”

..

Part 11 here

Notes: 10 chapters!! 52k words for this series <3 Thanks to everybody who stuck around haha I think we have like... two/three more parts until this series is over! I know the smut wasn't very long, but there will be more in the next chapter <3

Notes 2//: Please let me know what you guys think!!!

Tag list in the comments

Masterlist

[msfantasy-comics]

The Perfect Match

Jason Todd x Reader

Summary: A head cannon on how Y/n is the perfect match for Jason.

Warning: this contains references to heavy topics, so if you are easily trigged, then please read at your discretion.

Masterlist - Tip Jar

Jason is one of the most complex people.

His life experience has set him up for some incredible challenges.

By the grace of god for everything that is good, you walked in and made him whole.

You were, Jason’s perfect match.

Understanding and Reliant

Jason has had an incredibly traumatic past, the death of his father and loving step-mother, becoming homeless, feeling rejected by his adoptive family, having his birth mother sacrifice him, being killed by the Joker… seriously… what HASN’T this poor man been through?

With that, Jason needs a partner who can at least, understand that he has a lot of pain to bare, and that Jason had his own unique way in processing that trauma.

Dick: “He tried to force Bruce into killing the Joker.”

Y/n: “Was it wrong of him to get someone else to do his dirty work? Yes, absolutely, however, the Joker did kill him and his mother… need I say more?”

Damian: “He kills criminals- not turning them into Arkham as we are required to.”

Y/n: “Firstly… hypocrisy. Secondly, Arkham is fundamentally broken and objectively not effective as we have established numerous times. Jason has found a permanent solution to criminals who hurt without cause or resolution.”

Tim: “You’re literally excusing his actions.”

Y/n: “I’m not saying I agree with everything Jason has done, but I can understand why Jason has done what he did and why he thinks that way. Agreeing and understanding are completely different words.”

Jason sitting smuggly with his arms crossed.

Jason: “Yeah! Tell them off babe.”

Jason at times feels like you’re the only person who understands him.

But even more so, Jason loves that you defend him in front of others with unwavering support.

But in private you reason with him gently.

Y/n: “Baby, I see why you feel Bruce should’ve avenged your death, but it’s just not part of his philosophies, punishing him for someone else’s crime wasn’t fair… you really should apologise for torturing him, I truely believe Bruce was doing what he thought was best.”

Jason: “… I’ll think about it.”

Loyalty

Jason has severe abandonment issues.

His father and step-mother dying in quick succession, with no extended family willing to take him in.

Meeting his bio-mother, who bargained her own life in exchange for Jason’s. Which Jason graciously accepted despite how undeserving it was.

Bruce ‘replacing’ him quickly after with Tim.

Bruce not avenging his death with the Joker.

Jason was constantly making sacrifices for others and as far as he was concerned

No one returned the favour.

So Jason really values loyalty to the highest degree.

As he believes it’s a rare trait.

Your unwavering love and support is everything Jason could’ve asked for and more.

However…

Jason: “Would you leave me if I ever cheat on you.”

Y/n: “Yes, absolutely.”

Jason: 😲

Y/n: 😐

Communication Skills

Jason, is generally, horrible at communicating his feelings and needs.

His feelings are expressed through action. Not words.

This can often be frustrating but this just means you have to come up with creative ways in which Jason can express himself.

Jason: “Fuck, fuck, fuck everything is fucked!”

Y/n: “Common grumpy pants, let’s go for a drive.”

You’ll often drive Jason to scenic places and you’ll both wonder around in silence before you take him home snuggle up and just watch a movie.

You do all the right things without being asked.

You know what he’s trying to say without him saying a word.

You know that the last thing Jason needs, is to explain himself.

All he needs is reassurance.

Which you do perfectly.

Supportive in his Endeavours

Jason has a �� unique take on justice.

He is the lawyer, judge and executioner.

If he finds a criminal guilty of a heinous crime and said criminal is not sorry.

Then that criminal is typically never heard from again.

Whilst you may or may not agree, you both have a burning passion for the betterment of your community.

Don’t forget you both call Gotham your home.

Jason just loves how passionate you are at making the city better for everyone.

His focus is on cleaning up the crime whilst yours is to build a better foundation to better your community and home.

Jason loves that you hold the same values as his own.

[this-is-tiny-mia]

Reply All (H.S. Fic) | Chapter 5

General Masterlist

uni!harry x fem!reader PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3 | PART 4

Summary: Y/N and Harry were childhood best friends, inseparable through every laugh, secret, and growing pain. But high school brought unspoken feelings and decisions that tore them apart, leaving both with unanswered questions. Years later, a class project challenges them to face their shared past and uncover the truths they’ve both been running from. And a wrong click unveils the past and what will be the future.

Word count: 4.3k

A/n: Hey! i'm sorry i said i was putting this up yesterday! but i got caught up with more stuff than i had planned! but here it is!

Warnings: No warnings this time! all happy things.

Juliet sat cross-legged on her chair, her phone abandoned on the desk. She was looking at you with that expression she reserved for serious conversations—the one where her brow furrowed slightly, and her lips pressed into a thin line of concern.

“Alright,” she said, breaking the silence. “Let’s talk about Harry.”

You let out a long sigh, leaning back against your headboard. “I don’t even know where to start, J. It’s… complicated.”

“It’s only complicated if you let it be,” Juliet replied, her voice calm but firm. “What do you want, Y/N? Deep down, what do you really want from all of this?”

The question lingered in the air, heavy with implications. You fiddled with the hem of your sweater, avoiding her gaze. “I think… I want to try. I want to give him a chance, but…” You paused, struggling to find the words. “It’s not that simple. I can’t just erase everything that happened. He hurt me. A lot. And it’s going to take time for me to trust him again.”

Juliet leaned forward, resting her chin on her hands. “That’s fair. And honestly? That’s smart. But if you’re even thinking about giving him a chance, you need to be honest with him. You can’t keep him in the dark about how you feel, even if you’re unsure. It’s not fair to string him along if you just want to be friends—or if you can’t see yourself trusting him fully again.”

Your chest tightened. “What if I don’t know yet? What if I tell him I’m open to something, and then I change my mind? Or what if I realize I can’t move past what he did?”

“What if a spaceship crashes into this dorm right now?” Juliet shrugged, a small smile tugging at her lips. “You’ll never know, What if you just tell him the truth when you get there. But here’s the thing: he seems willing to work for it. If you’re willing to meet him halfway—even if it’s just a little—you owe it to yourself to see where it goes. Set your boundaries, Y/N. Make it clear that this isn’t some instant redemption arc for him. But don’t shut the door entirely if you’re curious about what could be.”

You sank deeper into the pillows, Juliet’s words circling in your mind. There was a flicker of hope in her tone, but it wasn’t blind optimism. She believed in you—believed you were capable of navigating this messy, confusing situation.

“So, you’re saying I should talk to him,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.

Juliet nodded, her gaze unwavering. “Not just talk. Be honest. Be clear. And most importantly, be kind to yourself in the process. You’ve been through a lot, Y/N, but you’re stronger than you think. You’ve got this.” 

You smiled at her, even if she was a hopeless romantic, she was a real and a good friend.

🌷

You slid into your usual seat, the professor’s voice droned on as they explained the day’s agenda: more project readings. You focused on steadying your breathing. After all, this was just a class, not a lion chasing you—or so you told yourself.

Then, the professor called Harry’s name.

He stood slowly, clutching his notebook. For a split second, his eyes darted to you before moving to the front of the room. That brief glance sent a flutter through your chest.

Harry began, his voice soft but steady. “I talked about guilt—the kind that wraps around you and doesn’t let go. But guilt, I’ve learned, isn’t just about the past. It’s about what you do with it. It’s about whether you let it crush you or whether you use it to build something better.”

He took a breath, his gaze flickering to you for just a heartbeat before looking back at the class.

“I hurt someone. Someone who believed in me, who trusted me more than anyone else ever had. And I let them down. I don’t think I realized, at first, just how deeply I’d cut them. It wasn’t just about losing their trust—it was about losing... them. Completely.”

His words hung in the air, and you could feel every student in the room hanging onto them.

“For a while, I let that loss define me. I thought maybe that was it—that I’d written my final chapter with this person, and all that was left was regret. But then, I realized something. Regret isn’t the ending—it’s the starting line.”

Harry’s hand tightened slightly around the notebook as he continued. “So if life gave me even the smallest opening—I wouldn’t just take it. I’d prove, every single day, that I could be better. Not just for me, but for them.”

His voice softened, and this time, when his eyes met yours, they stayed there for a moment longer. “Because some people are worth more than your fear, your pride, or your mistakes. And when you’ve been given the gift of their time, their laughter, their trust... you don’t waste it. Not again.”

The silence in the room was heavy but warm, like everyone had just witnessed something profound. The professor finally broke it with a quiet nod. “Thank you, Harry. That was deeply moving.”

Harry nodded back and made his way to his seat, but as he passed by, you caught the faintest hint of a smile—a nervous, hopeful one.

You sat frozen, his words swirling in your mind like a melody you couldn’t quite shake. His regret, his determination, his... hope. It was all there, laid bare, and it felt like it was meant for you and no one else. 

When the class ended, you stayed behind, unable to move as the rest of the students filtered out. Juliet leaned over, whispering with a smirk, “So, still think he doesn’t deserve a chance?”

You didn’t answer—because maybe, just maybe, you were willing to give him one.

🌷

The library was quieter than usual, the faint hum of fluorescent lights blending with the soft rustle of turning pages. Harry sat at a corner table, surrounded by textbooks and loose sheets of paper. His pen moved steadily across a notebook, but when he saw you approaching, his hand froze mid-word.

“Hey,” you said, sliding into the seat across from him.

His lips quirked into a hesitant smile. “Hey.”

For a moment, neither of you spoke. You busied yourself with your bag, pretending to look for something while your mind scrambled to piece together the words you’d rehearsed. Finally, you looked up, meeting his expectant gaze.

“I’ve been thinking…” you began, your voice steady despite the nerves bubbling “About everything you said, and everything that’s happened.”

Harry set his pen down, giving you his full attention. “Okay.”

You took a deep breath, the weight of the moment pressing down on your chest. “I want to be honest with you. I don’t have everything figured out yet, but I know this much: I’m open to… seeing where this goes. To trying. But I need you to understand something.”

He nodded, his expression serious. “Anything.”

“This isn’t going to be easy,” you said, your words firm but not unkind. “You hurt me, Harry. And trust—real trust—takes time. If we’re going to try this, you need to be patient. You need to show me, not just tell me, that I can trust you again.”

“I will,” he said immediately, his voice soft but resolute. “I know I have a lot to make up for, Y/N, but I’m ready. Whatever it takes, I’m ready to do it.”

You studied his face, searching for any hint of hesitation or insincerity. But all you saw was determination.

“I believe you,” you said finally. “But I need you to know that if, at any point, I feel like this isn’t working, I’m going to be honest about it. And I need you to promise me you’ll do the same.”

“Always,” he said, his eyes holding yours.

For the first time in what felt like forever, you felt a sliver of peace. It wasn’t the end of the journey—far from it—but it was a start.

🌷

Yellow post-its

The Apology.

Rifling through your bag after class, you noticed a yellow post-it, folded in half. Pulling it out, you immediately recognized the pink crayon lettering:

“I know I keep saying it, but I’m sorry. I mean it, every time. Even if you never respond, I’ll keep saying it because you deserve to hear it.”

The note wasn’t signed, but it didn’t need to be. You traced the edges of the paper with your fingers before carefully tucking it into your journal. A smile appeared on your face, unannounced

🖍️

You opened your notebook during a particularly dull lecture and found another yellow post-it stuck between the pages. The handwriting was unmistakably Harry’s, bold and messy, written in bright pink crayon:

“Good luck surviving this lecture. I think the professor’s voice might actually put us in a coma.”

You glanced over your shoulder to where he sat a few rows back. He wasn’t looking at you, but there was a faint smirk playing on his lips. You bit back a smile, tucking the note into your pencil case.

🖍️

You’d been staring blankly at your open notebook, trying to will yourself to start your assignment, when you noticed a post-it stuck to your laptop.

“You’ve got this. I know you do.”

The simplicity of the words, paired with the bright pink crayon, made you smile despite yourself. It was like he knew you needed a little push, even without being told.

🖍️

One morning, you found a post-it tucked under your coffee cup at the campus café.

“Sometimes I wish I could go back to the beginning. But since I can’t, I’ll just keep trying to make this new version of us something you can believe in.”

You held the note in your hands for a long time, the words sinking into you.

🖍️

During a particularly rainy day, you opened your umbrella and noticed something yellow flutter to the ground. A post-it, now slightly damp, written in that familiar pink crayon:

“Rain or shine, you’re still the brightest thing in the room.”

You couldn’t help but laugh softly as you tucked the note into your pocket, shielding it from the rain. You felt your cheeks grow hot—you were actually blushing. The butterflies, those persistent little creatures, were going crazy inside you now.

Harry was making you smile, laugh, feel at ease. He made you feel comfortable in a way you hadn’t expected, and this—this shy, tentative way of flirting—was exactly what you needed. It wasn’t pushy or overwhelming. It didn’t demand an answer from you, didn’t insist on a conversation you weren’t ready for.

Instead, it was patient.

It was thoughtful.

It was him, giving you the time and space to figure out your feelings, while still making it clear that he was there. Always there, in the best way possible.

You exhaled, the sound lost beneath the patter of rain against the pavement. For the first time, the thought of giving this a chance—giving him a chance—didn’t seem so terrifying. It felt... warm.

You didn’t let yourself linger on the thought too long, though. You couldn’t—not yet. But as you walked back to your dorm, your fingers brushing over the note in your pocket, you couldn’t stop the small smile that tugged at your lips. Maybe, just maybe, you were finally ready to let those butterflies take flight.

The door to your dorm clicked shut behind you as you stepped inside, shaking the light rain from your jacket. Your fingers lingered in your pocket, brushing over the yellow Post-it note tucked safely inside. You could feel the smile pulling at your lips, no matter how hard you tried to suppress it.

“Alright, spill,” Juliet’s voice rang out from her bed. She was lounging with her laptop balanced on her knees, but the moment she saw your face, her eyes lit up. “Why do you look like you just walked out of a rom-com?”

“What?” you asked, your tone pitched just a little too high. You busied yourself with hanging your jacket on the back of a chair, avoiding her gaze. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Juliet’s eyebrows shot up. “Oh, please. You’re grinning like a lovesick puppy. Something happened.”

“Nothing happened,” you replied, failing miserably to sound nonchalant. “I’m just... happy. Can’t a person just be in a good mood?”

Juliet shut her laptop with a knowing smirk and set it aside. “Sure, a person can. But you’re not just a person, Y/N. You’re you. And you don’t do ‘just happy’ without a reason. Now, tell me—does this have anything to do with a certain boy with a pink crayon?”

Your face betrayed you immediately, heating up in an unmistakable blush. “It’s nothing like that,” you said, waving your hand as though dismissing the idea. “He’s just... being nice. That’s all.”

Juliet’s smirk widened into a full grin. She crossed her arms, leaning back against her headboard. “Nice? Y/N, you’ve been giggling under your breath for the past five minutes. You don’t giggle. You hate giggling. You’re in love, and it’s adorable.”

“I’m not in love!” you shot back, flustered. You dropped onto your bed, pressing a pillow over your face. “He’s just... trying. He’s making up for everything. It’s nothing. I’m just... adjusting, okay?”

“Adjusting,” Juliet echoed, her tone dripping with sarcasm. “Right. You’re just ‘adjusting.’ That’s why you came in here lookin like you just got handed a love letter.”

You groaned, still hiding behind the pillow. “You’re impossible.”

“And you’re in denial” she shot back, nudging your leg with her foot. “But it’s okay. I’ll let you live in denial for now. Just know that when you’re ready to admit you’re falling for him, I’ll be here. And I’ll be so smug about it.”

Despite your embarrassment, you couldn’t help but laugh. Pulling the pillow away, you peeked at her, your smile betraying you once again. “Fine. Maybe there’s... something. But don’t make it a big deal, okay?”

Juliet’s grin softened into something warmer. “Deal. But for the record, I think it’s a big deal in the best way. You deserve this, Y/N. You really do.”

Her words settled in your chest, comforting and terrifying all at once. And as much as you hated to admit it, maybe—just maybe—Juliet was right.

🌷

The blanket was spread out over the soft grass, and the sky above you was painted in hues of orange, pink, and gold. The air was cool but not cold, and the scent of fresh grass mingled with the faint sweetness of the strawberries in the bowl between you and Harry. It was quiet except for the occasional chirp of birds and the distant hum of campus life.

“I can’t believe you still do this,” you said, gesturing to the array of snacks Harry had brought—sandwiches, chips, and your favorite chocolate bars. “You always overpack for picnics.”

He grinned, leaning back on his elbows. “I like being prepared”

You rolled your eyes, but your smile betrayed you. “For the apocalypse?”

Harry chuckled, his gaze fixed on the horizon. “You never complained when I brought extra chocolate, though.”

You couldn’t help but laugh softly, reaching for one of the bars. “Fair point.”

For a while, you both sat in comfortable silence, watching the sun dip lower in the sky. The oranges and pinks deepened, and a gentle breeze rustled through the trees. You glanced at Harry, who was absently picking at the edge of the blanket, his expression calm but thoughtful.

“Do you remember that time we tried to have a picnic in the rain?” you asked suddenly, breaking the quiet.

Harry looked at you, a grin spreading across his face. “How could I forget? You insisted the rain would stop, and we ended up soaked.”

“And you still shared your hoodie with me,” you added, laughing. “Even though I was the one who made us stay.”

He shrugged, his smile softening. “You were freezing. What was I supposed to do?”

The memory hung between you, warm and unspoken. You leaned back on your hands, letting out a content sigh. “This feels... nice.”

“Yeah,” Harry agreed, his voice quieter now. “It does.”

You turned to him, and for the first time in a long time, the weight of everything between you felt lighter. The tension that had lingered for so long was replaced by something calmer, something easier.

“I missed this,” you admitted softly. “Not just... us being friends. But this. Talking like this.”

Harry’s eyes met yours, and for a moment, he didn’t say anything. Then, he nodded. “Me too.”

The sun was just starting to dip below the horizon when you reached for a strawberry, but your fingers brushed his instead. The contact was brief, but it sent a ripple through you. You looked up, your eyes locked with his. He didn’t move his hand away, and neither did you.

Slowly, tentatively, he turned his hand over, his palm open. You hesitated for a second before placing your hand in his. His fingers curled around yours, warm and steady.

The breeze picked up, ruffling your hair, and you glanced away, focusing on the horizon. But the butterflies in your stomach were impossible to ignore.

“I like this,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. “I like... us.”

Harry’s grip on your hand tightened just slightly, and you could feel the sincerity in his voice when he responded. “I like you”

“You do? why don’t you tell that to the whole class in an email?” you teased him, it didn’t hurt anymore, instead you knew you were going to remind him that for a long time.

“C’mon!” he said a bit embarrassed but laughing softly

For the first time, it felt like maybe—just maybe—this could be the start of something new.

🌷 As the days passed, Harry remained steady in his carefulness. Whether it was having your coffee ready with the exact amount of sugar you liked, cracking a joke that made you laugh despite yourself, or even just meeting your gaze with a look so genuine it made your heart skip—it was as though he instinctively knew how to make you forget the pain, if only for a moment.

Yet, there was a subtle resistance in you, a reflex you weren’t even aware of. You had grown so accustomed to the act of pushing him away that it became second nature, even when you didn’t mean it. Each time he reached out, whether through a small gesture or a tentative comment, a part of you held back. It wasn’t distrust, exactly, but a lingering fear that clung to the edges of your heart.

Juliet noticed before you did.

It started with her pointed looks during your conversations, her eyes narrowing slightly whenever you brushed off one of Harry’s efforts. At first, you thought nothing of it, assuming she was simply amused by the dynamic. But one evening, as you both lounged on her bed eating chips and scrolling through social media, she spoke up.

“You know,” she said casually, crunching a chip between her teeth, “you’re kind of an idiot.”

You blinked, startled. “Excuse me?”

“You heard me,” she said, smirking but not unkindly. “Harry. You’re still pushing him away, even when you don’t want to. It’s like your brain is stuck in fight mode while your heart is ready to wave the white flag.”

You frowned, her words unsettlingly accurate. “I’m not... I’m not pushing him away on purpose”

Juliet tilted her head, studying you with a mix of sympathy and exasperation. “Look, I get it. He hurt you—badly. But you’re different now. He’s different now. And it’s not like he’s rushing you or demanding anything. He’s just... there. Trying. If you keep shutting him out, you’re going to miss the chance to figure out what this could be.”

You opened your mouth to argue, but no words came out. Instead, you let out a sigh and flopped back onto the bed, staring at the ceiling.

“I’m scared,” you admitted softly.

“I know,” Juliet replied, her tone gentler now. “But you don’t have to figure it all out at once. Just... notice when you’re pulling away. Let yourself lean in every once in a while. You might be surprised by how good it feels.”

Her words settled over you like a warm blanket, comforting yet challenging. Maybe she was right. Maybe it was time to stop letting fear dictate your actions. You didn’t have to have all the answers—but you owed it to yourself, and to Harry, to at least try. And that was the turning point for all this.

“But how do i let him know that without just saying it straight to his face, that’s lame” you said

Juliet raised an eyebrow “Oh, so now honesty is lame? The great Y/N, master of subtlety, can’t just tell him how she feels?”

You rolled your eyes, grabbing a pillow and smacking her with it lightly. “I’m serious, Jules. I don’t want to just blurt it out like, ‘Hey, Harry, guess what? I think I’m falling for you.’ That’s... weird.”

Juliet laughed, catching the pillow mid-swing. “Okay, okay. No grand declarations. But you don’t have to spell it out. Show him. Let your actions speak for you.”

You frowned, propping yourself up on your elbows. “Like what?”

“Like...Let him see that you’re not pushing him away anymore. Be more open. Let him catch you looking at him when he’s not paying attention. Laugh a little louder at his jokes. Maybe even let him win at rock-paper-scissors once in a while.”

You snorted, shaking your head. “I’m not letting him win. That’s non-negotiable.”

“Fine, keep your pride,” she said, rolling her eyes playfully. “But seriously, Y/N, the way you two are around each other, he’ll pick up on it. He’s not as clueless as you think.”

“So... just let it happen? No grand plan?”

Juliet nodded. “Exactly. Trust the process. Trust him. And trust yourself. You’ve already come this far—don’t overthink it.”

You sighed, letting her words sink in. “Fine. But if this goes horribly wrong, I’m blaming you.”

Juliet grinned, throwing her arms up in mock surrender. “Deal. But when it goes horribly right, I expect full credit.”

You laughed, a lightness settling over you that hadn’t been there before. Maybe Juliet was right. Maybe this didn’t have to be complicated. Maybe all you had to do was let go of the fear and lean into the moments—whatever they might lead to.

🌷

You and Harry were sitting cross-legged on the floor of your dorm, textbooks and notes spread out around you. He had insisted on helping you prepare for an upcoming exam, even though it wasn’t a subject he was taking. Juliet walked in, balancing a mug of tea in one hand and her phone in the other, pausing in the doorway when she saw the two of you.

“Am I interrupting something?” she teased, her eyes darting between you and Harry.

“Nope,” Harry said, leaning over to point something out in your notes. “Just helping Y/N understand some stuff”

You groaned, swatting his arm lightly. “Ignore him, J. He’s been making terrible puns for the past half hour.”

Juliet smirked, setting her tea down on the desk. “Oh, I don’t want to interrupt this play date, pretend i’m not here”

You shot her a look, but your cheeks betrayed you, heating up instantly. Harry just chuckled, unfazed, and continued explaining the concept like nothing had happened. Juliet caught your flustered expression and raised an eyebrow as if to say “Told you so.”

🌷

It was late afternoon, and you and Harry were walking back from the coffee shop. The air was crisp, and the golden hues of the setting sun made everything feel warm and surreal. Harry was quieter than usual, his hands stuffed deep into his pockets as you talked about your plans for the weekend.

“So, what are you doing Saturday?” he asked suddenly, his voice casual but his posture stiff.

You glanced at him, shrugging. “Not much. Probably catching up on homework or binge-watching something mindless. Why?”

“Oh,” he said quickly, as if he hadn’t expected you to ask. “No reason. Just... you know, thought maybe you’d want to do something. Together. If you’re free, I mean.”

You stopped walking, turning to face him. “Like what?”

Harry scratched the back of his neck, a shy smile playing on his lips. “I don’t know. There’s this... thing. A new art exhibit. Or, uh, we could grab dinner? Not that it’s a date or anything! Unless... I mean, it could be. If you wanted it to be. Or not. Totally up to you.”

He was rambling now, his cheeks flushed, and it was honestly adorable.

You couldn’t help but laugh softly. “Harry.”

“Yeah?”

“Dinner sounds nice.”

His eyes widened slightly, like he hadn’t expected you to say yes. “Really?”

“Really,” you replied, smiling at him.

For a moment, he just stood there, looking at you like you’d just agreed to move mountains. Then, a grin spread across his face, so genuine and wide it made your heart skip.

“Okay,” he said, his voice a little breathless. “Great. Saturday then.”

“It’s a date” you repeated, starting to walk again.

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw him fist-pump the air, thinking you didn’t notice. You laughed under your breath, pretending not to see, but inside, the butterflies were in full flight.

Tag list: @hermionelove @mads3502 @cherryloveshs @harrystyleshotwife @familyshow-orisit @fadingcherryblossomblaze @lunaharrygurl @gem1712 @millsadoresyou @prettydelilah @sassamanda77 @maddiesalvatore1839 @wheredidmyeyesgo

[angstywaifu]

Matchmaker - Ridoc x Reader

A/N: This is my first time writing for Ridoc so I hope you like it. Took a bit of extra thinking this one, but I think I nailed it. Well I hope I did! Ridoc loves Valentine’s Day, so he’s using his antics to set up all his friends. But chaos ensues because he’s not so great at spotting actual compatibility…except he knows he’d be compatible with you.

My corner of the library was nice and quiet. The library mostly empty with the everyone off on dates for Valentines Day. Seemed I was one of the few who had not managed to get a date. Though the library was usually on the empty side anyway.

The quiet doesn’t last long though. A loud band echoes through the library, followed by fast footsteps. Someone was running. I go to turn back to my book when I realise they are coming towards me.

I look up to see Ridoc round the corner of the book case. His head frantically scanning the area till his eyes fall on me. His usual goofy smile forming on his face as he rushes over to me and sits across from me. His eyebrow furrows at the look on my face.

”What the hell is that look for?” He asks.

I close my book and look at him. “What have you done now?”

He rolls his eyes as he leans back in his chair and looks away from me. “Nothing… major.”

I would have almost believed him, but it was Ridoc. And the muffled yell from the hallway tells me it is not nothing major.

”RIDOC GAMLYN!” A yell that vaguely sounds like it comes from Rhiannon, echoes from the hallway, Ridoc’s eyes going wide.

I raise my eyebrow at him. “Nothing major? Then why does it sound like Rhiannon wants your head?”

He sighs as he leans forward on the table putting his head in his hands. “You know how I really like Valentines Day?”

I nod. It was all he had gone on about in the recent weeks. Which had surprised me.

”Well I might have had the idea to try play cupid for our fellow squad mates. And sadly I might have made some not so good matches.” He admits with a sheepish smile.

I narrow my eyes at him. “Who the hell did you match Rhiannon up with?”

”I might have set her up to go on a date with Dain.” He admits with a sigh, his shoulders slumping.

Ridoc had always said I had resting bitch face. And the look I was giving him right was very unimpressed resting bitch face. I pinch the bridge of my nose as I cringe at the thought of those two together. It was not an ideal match. Especially with how close Violet is to Rhiannon. She knows everything he’s done.

“Why the hell did you think that was a good idea?”

He stands up and starts pacing, his hands gesturing wildly as he explains. “Well I thought because they are both strong leaders, who stick to their values.” He turns and points a finger at me. “And yes I know they have some different values, but I thought the whole opposites attract thing would work perfectly.”

I couldn’t deny it was adorable how into this he was. He was so excited about this thought process, that in the end was not very good. But his intentions were good.

”Rhiannon is too strong willed and independent for Dain. She would squish him like a bug. He needs someone he can essentially control. And that was Violet till she got sick of his shit.” I point out as he nods in agreeance.

He slumps into the chair in front of me. “I know. But now I’m worried my other set ups aren’t going to go well.”

”Wait, who else have you set up on dates?” I ask nervously.

At this rate our entire squad was going to want Ridoc’s head on a platter. And honestly I would help them if there other set ups were as terrible as Rhiannon and Dain. Though I can’t help the slight sadness that takes over me. He hadn’t tried to set me up with anyone. It wouldn’t have been any point. There was only one person I wanted. And it was the floppy dark haired boy sitting in front of me. Completely oblivious to how I felt.

“I might have set our entire squad up on dates.” He admits, a nervous smile on his face as his hair flops into his eyes. “But I think I can fix it if I set up one good date.”

Oh god. Please don’t be me. Please don’t be me. Please. Don’t. Be. Me.

“I am going to set you, my closest friend up on the perfect date for Valentines Day.” He says proudly with a smile that doesn’t quite meet his eyes despite how happy he tries to appear.

I yet again pinch my nose and shut my eyes, my hear thundering loudly in my chest.

”I don’t want a Valentines date.” I almost plead at him.

Wrong. I did. I wanted him. My goofy, oblivious, comedic relief best friend. He almost looks sad at my words.

”You don’t even know who I was going to set you up with!” He exclaims loudly.

I open my eyes and look at him. “Who is it then?”

”That wrecks the surprise.”

”After the way you’re match making is going, I don’t know if I want a surprise.” I tell him sternly.

He sighs. “Fine, it was going to be Sawyer.”

Sawyer wasn’t bad. He was one of my good friends. We got along really well. But there was nothing romantic about our relationship at all. Despite how similar he was to Ridoc at times. But there was just something about Ridoc that just drew me in.

”As much as thats a better match up than Rhiannon and Dain. I’m not doing it.” I say as I start to pack up my things. I don’t miss the hurt but almost relieved look Ridoc gives me.

”It’s just one date, it will be fine.” He tells me hurridly. “You two get along so well.”

“Yes as friends.” I tell him pointedly, shoving a book in my bag.

”Hey this could be the one date that leads to finding the love of your life.” He tries to joke with me.

My head whips so fast towards Ridoc it seems to startle us both.

”Trust me, it’s not.” I say sternly, grabbing the last of my things.

”Well who do you want a date with. I’ll make it work. I just need one perfect match up so the rest of the squad don’t serve my head on a platter for breakfast tomorrow. There has to be some one. Maybe you secretly want Dain.” He tries to joke as he walks around the table to me.

I shudder at the thought of going on a date with Dain. ”Ridoc, just leave it alone. Please.” I plead with him. I’m thankful his signet isn’t super hearing other wise I’m sure he could hear how fast my heart is pounding.

”But-”

“No!” I yell at him before storming off, leaving a very shocked Ridoc standing in the Library alone as I half run back to my dorm room.

I get back to my room, running past a concerned Violet and Rhiannon, who ultimately decide to leave me alone as I slam my door shut. I chuck my bag on my desk before flopping facedown on my bed. There was no way Ridoc didn’t think something was up with how I had acted and yelled at him before running away. I was usually the one that tolerated him the most out of our squad. And despite how he acted most of the time, he wasn’t stupid. Probably not smart enough to put together I liked him. Least I could hide in my room for the rest of the day before facing him tomorrow.

For a few hours I think I’ve managed to avoid him, till a knock sounds on my door. I sit upright on my door and hope whoever is knocking thinks I’m gone. But depending who it is they probably saw me enter and never leave. A minute later another knock sounds on my door. Followed my a thump, almost as if someone as banged their head on my door.

”Y/N, I know you’re in there. Please open the door.” Calls a very muffled, very sad sounding Ridoc on the other side.

I sigh and untangle myself from the blanket and pillows I had wormed my way under and head to the door. I slowly open the door to see Ridoc lazily leaning on my door way fiddling with his hands. He slowly looks up at me. He’s nervous.

He slowly holds one of his hands out to me. “Come with me.”

Before I can think my hand is in his, and he’s leading my down the now very empty hall way that’s usually riddled with cadets at this hour. He doesn’t say a single word as he leads me through corridors and down stair cases. As he leads me towards the healers quadrant, I suddenly get very confused as to where he is taking me. I wasn’t hurt, except for my potential feelings, and he wasn’t. Just like the riders quadrant, it is quieter than usual over here. They must also be very big on Valentines Day over here as well. He leads me to the bottom of the tower closest to the riders quadrant and out a door into the forest.

I want to ask where the hell he is taking me, but I keep as silent as him as he leads me towards a clearing in the trees where I can vaguely see a small lake in the distance. He pulls us to a stop few metres from the clearing, standing in front of as he holds my hands in his.

”Close your eyes for me.” He says quietly and nervously

I nod my head and close my eyes. His hands let go of mine letting them fall to my sides. I hear him walk a few steps away before a cold wind rushes past me, sending a chill down my spine. I know this feeling all to well. Ridoc is using his signet.

Ridoc grabs my hands again and leads me forwards. As we get closer to the clearing I can feel the temperature drop. He definitely used his signet. But for what?

”Open your eyes.”

I open them to see that lake I saw earlier now completely frozen over. It wasn’t a big lake, but it was definitely the largest thing I had seen him freeze. It would have taken a lot of power. I look over at him to see he does look a little more tired than usual. But it doesn’t seem to phase him as he stares at me so intently.

”Do you like it?” He finally asks as he steps closer to me.

I nod my head. “Its beautiful Ridoc. But I do have to admit I’m a little confused.”

He chuckles and nods his head as he leads us closer to the edge. He holds his hand out towards our feet. Within seconds, he has used his signet to make skates for the bottom of our riders boots. I look over at him to see him softly smiling at me. I now know why he’s done this. When it had started getting colder I had mentioned how I use to ice skate as a kid. Well attempt to with what we can. He remembered. He walks backwards onto the ice, pulling me with him.

”I realised as you walked away from me in the library I had been an idiot. And before you say it, I know I am a lot of the time.” I smile and nod at him. “But I’m not a complete idiot. Sawyer isn’t who I really wanted to set you up on a date with. I was just too scared to set you up on the date I thought would actually be perfect cause I wasn’t sure if I was being biased to how I felt.”

Ridoc grips my hands tighter as he pulls me flush against him, his hands now holding me by my waist as he looks nervously at me. One of my hands has taken place on his chest and I can feel his heart beating heavily underneath. Good to know I’m not the only one with a heart about to burst at the seems. But his words start to sink in. Ridoc feels the same way.

”But then the way you reacted, got me thinking. Maybe it wouldn’t be so biased. And then when I came after you after standing in the library like an idiot for a few minutes. I ran into Rhiannon and Violet, who despite wanting my head on a platter, helped me.”

I smile and nod. Violet and Rhiannon did know my true feelings for Ridoc. Gods, they’d been the ones to point it out to me after staring at Ridoc during one of the challenges. They’d taken to teasing me quite a bit, but had agreed to keep my secret. Well till now at least.

I push away from him, skating away, spinning around on the ice. “Well, looks like you might have succeeded on your perfect match up Ridoc.”

The smile he gives me consumes his whole face. “Hell yeah I did!” He yells before chasing after me on the ice.

[beargirlmj]

Hearts at Stake.

genre : fluff

warning(s) : none

Jiminjeong x fem!reader

Previous → part 2 .

Chapter 3:

Sitting in the park, Minjeong and Jimin watched Y/n closely. The tension in the air was palpable, and every second felt like an eternity as they waited for the response that would change their lives. Y/n took a deep breath, seemingly struggling to find the right words.

"I’ve thought a lot about what you both told me," she began, her voice soft but firm. "And I need to be honest with you because you deserve the truth."

Minjeong and Jimin exchanged anxious glances. Both their hearts were racing, bracing themselves for whatever was coming next.

"I like you both," Y/n continued, looking directly at each of them. "But what I feel is… complicated. Because I’ve realized something I didn’t expect. It’s not that I like only one of you. I... I like both of you."

The silence that followed seemed to echo through the park. Minjeong and Jimin were left speechless, unable to process what they had just heard. What Y/n was saying was completely unexpected.

Y/n went on, trying to explain her feelings better. "When you told me you were competing for me, I was so surprised. But as I thought about it, I realized my feelings for both of you are strong, and not in different ways. I’m drawn to Minjeong’s sweetness and sensitivity just as much as I am to Jimin’s confidence and energy. The problem is… I can’t choose."

Minjeong, still trying to process everything, looked at Jimin, who seemed equally confused. "So, you’re saying that… you like us both at the same time?" Minjeong asked cautiously.

Y/n nodded, appearing somewhat relieved to have finally confessed. "Yes. And I know it sounds complicated, but I can’t deny what I feel. I always thought that when the time came, it would be easier, that I’d know right away who my heart belonged to more. But the truth is, I feel complete with both of you."

Jimin, usually quick to respond, stayed silent for a moment before finally speaking. "And… what does that mean, then? Because honestly, I never saw this coming."

Minjeong also seemed uncertain. She looked at Y/n, then at Jimin, trying to grasp what this meant for their future.

Y/n sighed, her expression vulnerable. "I don’t expect you to accept this easily, or to understand right away. But before you make any decisions, I wanted to be honest about what I feel. If you don’t want to go down this path, I’ll completely understand. But if there’s any chance we could find a way to make this work, I’d like to try."

Y/n’s proposal was unexpected, and both Minjeong and Jimin knew it would be a challenge. Up until that moment, both had believed that in the end, there would be only one winner. But what if, instead of competing, they could find a balance that honored all their feelings?

Jimin, the first to recover from the shock, chuckled softly. "I’m not gonna lie, this is completely crazy. But at the same time… I don’t want to lose either of you. Minjeong, you’re my best friend, and Y/n, you’re so special to me. Maybe… maybe we can figure this out together?"

Minjeong looked at Jimin, surprised by her response. Part of her still felt unsure, but seeing Jimin so open to the possibility made her think. She looked at Y/n, seeing the genuine sincerity in her eyes, then back at Jimin.

"It’s crazy, yeah," Minjeong finally admitted, smiling. "But… I don’t want to lose anyone either. If you two are willing to try, I think I can try too."

Y/n smiled, clearly relieved. "It’s not going to be easy. I know this is new for all of us, and we’re going to need a lot of patience and communication. But if we can find a way, I think we can be really happy together."

And so, what seemed like a simple competition transformed into an unexpected and unique relationship. Minjeong, Jimin, and Y/n decided to move forward, unsure of what the future held but confident that together, they could overcome any challenge. What started as a rivalry for Y/n’s heart had evolved into something much more complex but also more beautiful: a deep connection between three people who decided, against all odds, to create something new and special.

The weeks that followed were a period of adjustment and learning. There were moments of insecurity and doubt, but over time, the three learned to communicate better, to respect each other’s feelings, and above all, to value the unique connection they shared.

Minjeong and Jimin, despite starting as rivals, found a new way to relate to each other. They realized that instead of competing, they could support and appreciate the differences each brought to the relationship. And Y/n, at the center of this dynamic, felt grateful to have two incredible people by her side, both willing to try something as unexpected as the love they shared.

By the end of that summer, they knew they didn’t have all the answers, and the road ahead would be full of challenges. But for the first time, they were willing to walk it together, embracing the uncertainties and trusting what they felt. After all, love, in all its forms, can be complicated, but it’s also capable of creating deep and unexpected connections—like the one Minjeong, Jimin, and Y/n had found.

[glade-constellation]

Man, I really feel like today’s LAES episode was an agreement to my character analysis post (not literally but all my points were there). Everything Earth talked about and explained was my exact feelings on the matter. Sun is in immense grief. Moon was doing nothing. Lunar is doing worse than nothing. Solar is the only other competent one in the situation, and he’s also probably feeling like shit.

It’s so upsetting when Earth is hurt because people never ask her if she’s okay unless she brings it up. Solar was the only one to ask so far. He only left her when she told him she would talk with Monty about it, and expressed she would feel guilt about putting her problems on him when he is going through his own. She is always placed on the back burner and is rarely ever comforted outside of when she asks for it.

I almost feel bad for saying she was going to be the best off in this situation because she very much isn’t. She is grieving too, but she’s having to pick up where Moon and Lunar are slacking off and doesn’t have time to process her feelings herself. She expressed several times how upsetting it was that she has barely any help taking care of Dazzle on top of her own work. She’s also had to pick up their slack at the Daycare, since Sun can’t come in and Lunar isn’t actually the best at his job by himself. She needs someone to help her right now, and I’m so glad Monty was able to step in and help. It made my opinion his reaction to all this change very quickly.

Her feelings on the matter are also just heartbreaking. She cares so much for Nexus, and any time she tried to express it Lunar would brush it off. Tell her that he didn’t care about Nexus. That, in a way, probably felt like he was telling Earth “I don’t care about your problems because they don’t interest me”. Stuff like that alongside his already spiraling relationship with her is causing a riff she doesn’t need right now. It’s something she simply can’t deal with on top of literally everything else.

Since this episode was set before Moon started helping, I am glad that Moon finally did help. But Lunar is still dragging his feet on this whole thing. “He wasn’t my brother, I was never close to him, I genuinely don’t care”. Then he’s all surprised when Sun was genuinely upset over Nexus’ death. Like he’s projecting his feeling onto everyone else. He didn’t care, so why does Sun? Every episode I watch leads me to believe more and more that Lunar’s entire sense of being is being changed by this Star power. Even if he is an animatronic, he still used to act very human. After the Astrals entered the picture though, he has slowly began to act more like them. Hearing that Earth feels the same way really validated my feelings on this. Literally used the word apathetic, like I did in my earlier character analysis post.

All in all, I am desperately waiting for Earth to get the help and time she needs. Because I do not want to watch her try and bottle this all up. I am so very thankful that Monty is willing to help her and that she has an outlet. If Monty wasn’t there, I think Earth might have eventually snapped. I don’t think that outcome would have been pretty, especially between herself and Lunar.

[nervoussagittarius]

got to have a taste of a pretty girl

matt sturniolo x singer!reader

summary: a past experience is brought up causing you to finally be comfortable telling your boyfriend your biggest secret, request

warnings: fluff, language, coming out, slight angst

“hey matt.” you said as he picked up your phone call. your current position on your couch was one of nervousness. you sat on the edge, hunched over, with your leg bouncing with anxiety.

“hey baby, what’s up?”

“so i have something to show you and was wondering if you’d be willing to come over?”

“yeah absolutely. i’ll see you in 10, love you!” he said hanging up the phone.

to rewind, you were cleaning out a few boxes this morning when you came across a cd with some of your old, unreleased, songs on it. you had a habit of recording stuff that was almost to personal to put out and hiding it away. you used this method almost as a coping mechanism. out of sight, out of mind.

curiosity came over you and you decided to see exactly what songs were in this record. a few of them were really nothing, just some stuff you had made when you were messing around with different vocals and settings. but the last song was something that you really did want to hide. you never meant to come across it again.

this song described the first intimate experience you ever had with another girl. you were about 18 at this point, close to a year before you even knew matt. you had known for a while that you liked women and men, but the only person you told was your best friend alexa.

now alexa was completely boy crazy. never once thinking she might be into girls. until one night when you guys decided to go to some random la house party a mutual friend was hosting.

after a few hours you both started feeling flirty and we’re having a lot of fun dancing with each other. this was when alexa decided to tell you that she had thought you were her favorite person she’d ever met and how if she were to ever experiment with a women it would definitely be with you.

one thing led to another and she led you into her bed. only to wake up the next morning saying it was a good time but it was a mistake that will never happen again. she could pretend all she wanted but it already happened. so you guys went your separate ways.

you weren’t devistated my any means, you almost expected things to happen this way. she went on to keep her boyfriend and you moved on with your life.

you never really felt comfortable telling anyone else about your sexuality though. it was a really scary process. you never knew how that person would react, and you were fine never being in a romantic relationship with a girl. you really did want to spend the rest of you life with matt. it was only far though that matt knew the real you.

matt knocked on your door exactly 9 minutes and 23 seconds after he hung up the phone. you were so nervous you kept count.

he let himself in like normal and made his way to your couch, leaning down to give you a kiss.

“okay, so what did you want to show me” matt asked with a dopey smile on his face.

“well,” you started. “i found something this morning and i’d like you to listen to it.”

you made your way over to the cd player and pressed play on the song, not so formally named, pretty girls.

a long 2 minutes and 26 seconds went by before the song ended.

“it was a good song, sweetheart. i love all of your music, but i’m a little confused about what it means. are you trying to tell me something? did someone do something to you? i’m not really comprehending.” matt began to ramble.

you took his hands in your, “okay i’ll explain. so basically, about a year before we started dating i was friends with this girl named alexa.” you stopped to take a deep breath but it came out shakier then expected.

“it’s okay love take your time”

you couldn’t get through the rest of the story.

“i’m not straight, matt”

you could see his eyes slightly widen but he nodded at you to continue.

“i’m bisexual, and alexa was the first girl i even did anything with. it didn’t really mean anything, to either of us, but she was the only one that knew and we were at a party. and she wanted to experiment, but she had a boyfriend. and it’s all a little blurry, but i needed to tell you because i’m really tired of hiding it.” your eyes started to fill with tears at your rant. it all was settling in on you.

“i really don’t want to lose you because i love you so fucking much, but i had to tell you how i really feel. and the song doesn’t really have anything to do about it, but it seemed like a good lead way into the topic.”

matt let go of your hands. you looked up at him in confusion and wariness. he instead grabbed your face and used the pads of his thumbs to wipe the tears that had begun to fall. he leaned his forehead against yours with tears also in his eyes.

“can i say something now?” matt asks.

you gave him a nod with a slight laugh.

“i am so proud of you.” matt said with a raspy chuckle. “i am so grateful that you felt comfortable enough to share that with me. you have not idea what it means. i see how much shit people who are homosexual go though and it’s really scary. so thank you.”

“and you could never lose me for being honest with me. if anything it makes me love you even more.”

once matt finished talking, you leaned forward to give him a passionate kiss. matt layed his back into your couch as he pulled you into his chest so he was holding you.

you went on to have a long and intense conversation on the entire event that happened between you and alexa. you also told him how and when you realized you were bisexual.

“i kinda want to put the song out.” you said as you played with the hem on his shirt.

“i think that’s a great idea, baby”

an: the end. i’m sorry it’s kinda short but full song credits go to mother renee rapp. i could’ve never written this without her. i hope y’all enjoyed🤍

[otakubimbo]

Revenge Is My New Last Name

Miguel O'Hara x F!reader CEO/Mafia Boss Au

Chapter 2: The Marriage

Summary: The wedding was upon you, and you still haven't told your own mother. For the sake of your mother, you were willing to do this, but what surprise did this wedding have in store for everyone.

MDNI

previous | next

The wedding preparations started almost immediately; it was set for two weeks since Miguel would soon be declared the head of the company. Every choice was taken without your consideration, and your stepmother made all the choices for you. You haven’t even had time to see your mother in days, on top of that, you still haven’t met your future ‘husband’. Through the whole process, Elaine is there snickering on about how you’re ‘getting sold off’ and marrying an ‘ugly mad man’. At that point, you were just numb to everything; it didn’t matter what she had to say, nothing mattered if your mother was okay.  It wasn’t like your life was yours anyway; it hadn’t been for so many years.

Currently, you have been dragged into looking at venues even if you didn’t have any choices; they still had to put up the appearance that you were a willing participant. The fake smile that you had constantly been wearing on your face was starting to hurt. In the middle of nodding and smiling, your phone starts going off. It was the specific ringtone for the hospital, and you scrambled to get your phone out of your purse, worried that something bad had happened to your mother. As you pull your phone out, Reese gives you a death glare as if not to answer.

“It’s the hospital,” You say before quickly answering, “Hello?”

“Hello, it’s Tiffany,” The head nurse says through the receiver.

“Hi Miss Tiffany, is everything okay with mom?” your voice trying to remain as calm as possible

“Yes, your mother is fine,” She starts, and you sigh in relief, brow still scrunched, wondering what the call could be for then, “She’s been asking about you every day, she seems worried. I’m concerned the stress may affect her health.”

You pause before answering, biting on the side of your thumb, a nervous habit you’ve never managed to break. “I know, I’ve been kind of busy lately,” You look up to see the wedding coordinator looking at you with genuine concern in her eyes and then there’s Reese looking absolutely pissed, “I should be able to visit soon.”

“Please do, but make sure you’re taking care of yourself too, kiddo.” Tiffany’s motherly side is coming out.

You let out a small chuckle, “Yes, ma’am, I will.”

“See you soon.”

“See you soon.”

You take a deep breath before you turn around to look at the wedding coordinator and Reese. Of course, Elaine is snickering behind her mother, you were sure she could feel the anger radiating off her, and that usually never went well for you.

“We can always reschedule if you need to leave, I know we are on a tight schedule bu---” The coordinator starts before being cut off by Reese

“No!” Reese interrupts before composing herself, “What I mean to say is that I would be more than happy to finish looking at venues for her. If that’s okay with you?” She says before looking at you with a tight-lipped smile.

Fuck it. You didn’t care about this wedding anyway and cared more about being with your mother. Reese would most likely pick the most expensive, most gaudy place, but it didn’t matter.

“Yes, that’s fine with me. I would really appreciate that actually” you say, making Reese take a step back, surprised at your kind response.

“If that’s what works for everyone, then that is fine,” The coordinator says, clapping her hands together, “Now go and see your mother, we will pick out the most incredible venue for you.”

“Thank you so much!”

You may have broken a few laws on the way to the hospital, but your mother needed to see you. On the way, you tried your best to think about what you would say to her. How were you going to explain getting married next week? By the time you got there, you had just come up with telling her the truth.

Through your whole explanation, the frown didn’t leave your mother’s lips. Despite how weak and pale she was, she still had the energy to be upset. It seemed like a part of her was disappointed, and you couldn’t tell if that was towards you or herself. Before you could finish, she held a hand up to stop.

“If you’re only doing this for me, then I demand you put a stop to this.” Her tone was firm, stronger than you’ve heard in years.

An exasperated sigh leaves your lips, you knew she was going to be like this. You grab her hand, making it cup your face, “It’s for both of us, mommy. You’ll be taken care of, and I won’t have to worry about anything during residency.”

Your mother’s eyes sparkle at hearing about your residency. As long as you spoke mostly of the truth, one lie wouldn’t hurt. And maybe your husband would let you attend your residency; you doubted it, but the thought would at least put your mother at ease.

“You got your placement?” Her face was shining at you with such pride and excitement. You release her hand for your face and reach for your purse, pulling out the letter that you painstakingly ironed after wrinkling. She basically snatches it from your hands, reading it as her smile grows wider and wider. You can see the tears starting to form on her lash line.

“Oh, my brilliant daughter. Come here, hug your mother.” She requests, extending her hands out wide for you to place yourself into, “I am the most blessed woman to have such an amazing child as you. I am so proud of you, I’ll always be proud of you, I’ve always been proud of you. This is all you’ve worked so hard for, and you did it, baby, you did it all by yourself.”

It’s you who starts to feel the water making its way over your lash line. Besides curing your mother, the only other thing you’ve ever wanted was to make her proud. And you knew she was always proud of you, you did, but it’s different to hear it. The tears weren’t just for that, though; it was for the loss of what could have been. You knew you weren’t going to your residency, and as much as it made your heart swell from your mother’s pride but the knowledge that you may never get to your residency. It would all be worth it, though, worth it to continue to see your mother smile.

And that’s why you were there, now, sitting in a chair getting your makeup and hair touched up while you clutched onto the bouquet. It would be one of those days were your coils refused to be tamed, both your stepmother and hair stylist getting upset at its defiance. If you couldn’t do it yourself, at least your hair was rebelling for you.

Elaine looks annoyed, sitting across from you, her hair more easily slicked back into a low bun. You watched her with tired eyes, wondering why either of them bothered to show up. It can’t be to make sure you go through with it, they know you would for your mother. What was it for then? To watch as if you are legally bound to another family? To confirm if the rumors about your new husband are true? To gloat? You jumped out of your thoughts at a snatch of your hair.

“Ugh” Reese groans before sticking another Bobby pin in your hair, “If your hair wasn’t just so damn nappy.”

That comment pulled a smile to Elaine’s face, a wicked grin spreading as you knew she was about to say something cruel.

“At that’ll make it easier for your new monster of a husband to drag you around with” Elaine snickers at herself. Why does nothing bad ever happen to the wicked? What sins did you commit in a past life to deserve any of this?

Your eyes gaze down at your wrist, which holds the bracelet your mother gave you. It was delicate silver vines, adorned with flowers stoned with sapphire. ‘For your something old and something blue,’ she told you, a mixture of warmth and sadness in her eyes. You turned it around on your wrist, admiring how beautiful it was. At the very least, you had a piece of your mother with you since she couldn’t be here. Contract wedding or not, you still wanted your mom to be here, to see you, but you realized a long time ago that you would never get to what you ever wanted.

As you hear the door open and see your father, it is time to accept the fate that life has given you. This was it.

Your father nearly gasped when he saw you. “You look so beautiful, sweetheart.”

“I did the best I could,” Reese spoke up before you could say anything. Your lips immediately formed a tight smile.

“Thanks, Father.”

They arrange your veil, covering your face entirely. Before you could get up, Elaine comes towards you, that faux innocent smile that made your stomach churn, but so many people believed. She bends down as if hugging you to whisper into your ear.

“I can’t wait to see what kind of troll you’re going to marry. I would wish you good luck, but you don’t deserve it.” Her sickly-sweet voice rings in your ear, forcing you to bite your tongue as she places a kiss on your cheek. Oh, if only you could just head butt her right now.  It was as if she realized the fury that dwelled within you as she quickly scurried out. You had never put your hands on her before, but she could tell you were nearing your breaking point.

Once the doors are closed, it’s you and your father left in an empty room. He extends his hand out to you, but you ignore it, standing up on your own two feet, you’ve had to do for years now. You walked over to the mirror, and you truly did look beautiful, but there were no more sparkles in your eyes. The makeup was a surprisingly good match; you were thankful you weren’t two shades different from your chest. Truthfully, you didn’t think you’d ever looked better, and at least you could be happy about that. Your mother is going to love the pictures; she used to love dressing you up.

With a deep exhale, you turn to your father, “Alright, let’s go”. He places the veil to cover your face and loops his arm around yours. to your surprise, he’s shaking. You don’t dwell too much on it, he was the one who put you in this situation anyway, who was he to be the one nervous?

Before you can get through the door of the chapel, you hear an almost wave of angry whispers. What the hell was happening behind those doors? As the doors in front of you open, the music starts to play, and the whispers die down. Everyone turns to face you, while your eyes scan across the room. Your eyes fell onto Reese and Elaine, their faces upturned, and they looked down right pissed. A wave of confusion hits you as your eyes scan more of the room, it's packed full of people, and not many faces you recognize. For a man who they claim doesn’t have any mob affiliations, there were a lot of mob-looking characters around the room. As your eyes drift down the aisle, your heart starts beating in your chest as your breath starts to quicken. At the end of that aisle was one of the most handsome men you have ever seen. You almost dropped your bouquet as your eyes met even behind the veil; it was as if he could see through it; his gaze quite literally took your breath away, and you started coughing a bit. Your father rubs your back which causes your stepfamily to suck their teeth, because it wasn’t enough that they were getting everything that they want, your father can’t care about you at all to make them happy.

After you compose yourself, you begin to walk down the aisle, your heartbeat thumping in your ears so loudly you can barely hear the music. You didn’t think you would be nervous, you didn’t even think you would care, but here you were trying to break that piercing red gaze of his while remembering how to breathe.  He was built like a god, chiseled features, dark brown hair slicked back, his expression looked bored and annoyed, but his eyes held a surprisingly fiery glint. His eyes held a bit of curiosity as they searched over your veiled features, looking for you behind them. The moments down the aisle felt like seconds, minutes, and hours all at once until you finally reached the end.

“Who gives this bride away?” A voice next to you says, but you can barely hear anything. All you see is the man in front of you, only thinly clouded through the veil.  As more words get said around you, he slowly pulls back your veil, revealing yourself to him. His eyes flicker with what looks like recognition, but you would assume that he was surely someone you could never forget. As you finally looked him directly in the eyes, it was almost as if a surge of energy bounced between you two. You never thought the movies were true, where once you found your person, everything fades away, or if love at first sight was real, but if any of it were true, then you felt in your bones, in your spirit, that this was one of those moments. It felt like you were on autopilot, even when you said, ‘I do,’ you couldn’t even hear your voice say the words, but you felt your mouth move.  And then he was kissing you, finally remembering to breathe in those moments as you kissed him back, aggressive and passionate. Before you knew it, you were ripped from your new husband and smacked across the face.

“What the hell are you doing, you whore?” Elanie screams in your face, but before you can even respond, you are gently being pulled back, and several guns appear, pointing at your stepmother's face.

“You touch the mistress again and you die.” One of the men, who took a stance right in front of you and Miguel, says towards her. Your eyes begin to water as your brain processes the pain of the slap. A small warm hand comes to gently caress your face, turning your head to see a shorter woman with glasses.

“You okay, sweetie?” the woman gently speaks to you, scanning your face for any other wounds besides the reddening of her face. You don’t speak for a moment as the woman tries to soothe you, “I’m Lyla, I work for Miguel. Are you okay?”

The sound of guns cocking back snaps you out of your stupor.

“Yes, I’m fine. I’m okay.” You respond, straightening yourself out. You walk past the men, slowly pushing them back to get to your stepmother, “With this, we are even; I don’t owe anything to the family after this. From here on out, we are no longer considered family. You don’t even wait for a response as you turn around and walk back down the aisle. Lyla and a few of Miguel's men follow behind you.  When you finally make your way back to the dressing room, you break down and collapse into tears. All you remember before you pass out is Lyla rubbing your back attempting to soothe you.

Taglist:

@lou-diaries

[marvelskies1969]

Infinity

Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader / Loki x Fem!Reader

Premise: Y/N Rogers was sent away as a child, her powers deemed dangerous. After years of brief summers with Steve and Bucky, she returns for good when their mother dies—just as war begins.

As her abilities awaken, she draws the attention of Loki, the trickster god, and faces growing fear from those around her. Caught between destiny, war, and forbidden ties, Y/N must decide who she truly is—and who she’s willing to fight for.

Warnings/content: slight angst, brief mention of death/dying, jealousy, fluff, swearing, unstable parental relationships, slut shaming (brief), angry Steve, follows the plot of the MCU timeline, with small changes.

[Masterlist]

[Part 4]

Chapter 103

Family Fractures

The tension inside the car was palpable, thick as fog. Steve’s eyes were locked on the road ahead, hands gripping the steering wheel tightly, but the anger in his posture was unmistakable. Y/N, sitting behind him, felt the atmosphere suffocating, every inch of her body thrumming with the need to scream or run—anything to break this unbearable silence. Beside her, Bucky’s quiet presence was almost a comfort, though he, too, seemed unsure of how to proceed.

Sam sat in the front, his gaze darting between the two of them, trying to gauge what was going on. The silence was deafening, and it was obvious to him that something was seriously wrong. He shifted in his seat, feeling the weight of the conversation that had yet to happen.

Y/N finally broke the stillness. “Steve, I’m trying here,” she said, her voice quieter than she intended. But before she could go any further, Steve’s voice cut through, harsh and laced with frustration.

“How did you let this happen?” he demanded.

Y/N blinked in surprise, her stomach turning at the edge of anger in his voice. “What do you mean, Steve?” she almost whispered. “I think it’s quite straightforward how it happened.” She glanced between Bucky and Sam praying they wouldn't figure it out.

Steve’s grip on the wheel tightened even more. His shoulders were tense, his jaw clenched as he glared ahead. “You know what I mean, Y/N. It’s not like back in the war. There’s things to use now to stop this.” His words came out in a rush, as if all of it had been building inside him for too long. The disappointment, the anger, the helplessness.

“Are you really doing this right now?” Y/N’s voice shook with the sting of his words. “This is my life, not yours.”

Bucky, who had been sitting in the seat beside her, was still. He could feel the weight of the conversation pressing in on him, but for once, he didn’t know what to say. Sam turned slightly, glancing between Steve and Y/N, sensing the conflict but unsure how to ease the tension.

Steve finally whipped around, his eyes hard with disbelief. “Who’s is it?” His voice wasn’t just angry now; it was almost accusatory, as though the answer would somehow explain everything.

Y/N froze. For a moment, the words stuck in her throat. She could feel the pressure building, the weight of his expectations suffocating her, and yet... it was Steve. He was her brother. This should have been easier.

“Steve... I’m not—”

“Who’s is it?” His voice cut through her attempts to explain.

The words stung, and the sharpness of his tone pierced through her fragile composure. “I’m not doing this, Steve. I’m still processing it myself,” she finally managed, her voice barely above a whisper.

But Steve wasn’t done. His words were a cold slap in the face. “Oh my God. You don’t even know, do you?” he said, realization flooding his face, but it was coated in disbelief.

Y/N’s stomach twisted painfully as she tried to hold onto the shred of composure she had left. She hadn’t expected this from him. Not this level of disdain, of accusation.

And then, Steve’s words cut deep, the jagged edge of his disappointment raw and cutting.

“I never expected this from you,” he muttered, his voice tight. “Never expected you to get pregnant by someone and not even know who the father is.”

Her breath hitched. It felt like the ground beneath her was being ripped away, and in that moment, the hurt stung like a thousand needles.

“Never expected my sister to be such a slut,” Steve added bitterly.

The air in the car went completely still. Sam’s eyes widened in shock, his mouth slightly agape. Bucky’s jaw tightened, his eyes flickering between Steve and Y/N, his muscles tense as though he were preparing to jump into the fray at any second.

Y/N’s body shook with rage. Her mouth opened, but the words she had been holding back exploded in a rush. “Oh, I’m such a slut, am I?” she snapped, her voice cracking with the weight of his accusation. “I’m nearly a hundred years old, Steve! I’ve slept with two people in my entire life!”

The words were sharp, harsh, and yet so much more than just a defense. They were a counter to everything Steve had just called her, to every hurtful assumption.

“And one of them is in this car,” she added with finality, her eyes flashing with a defiance Steve had never seen from her before.

A shocked silence fell over the car, the weight of her words sinking in.

Sam’s eyes went wide, his mouth hanging open in stunned silence. “Wait… what?” he breathed, looking back and forth between Y/N and Bucky. He looked at Steve for an explanation, but Steve was still frozen, his face pale as he processed the bombshell.

Sam panicked. “Well I just want to make it damn clear right now, it's not me!”

Bucky shifted uncomfortably, his expression unreadable, though there was a flicker of something behind his eyes—something he couldn’t quite hide. For a moment, he looked like he wanted to speak, to explain, but he held his tongue. This was Y/N’s fight, not his.

The tension in the car grew, thick and suffocating, until Y/N felt something hit her—hard. The wave of nausea that crested inside her was sudden, undeniable. It took her by surprise, and her stomach churned violently. She clutched at her belly as if it could somehow hold the contents inside.

“Stop the car,” she gasped, barely able to get the words out.

“Y/N?” Steve’s voice cracked with concern, but before he could react, she shouted again, louder this time.

“Stop the fucking car!”

Steve’s gaze darted toward the road, panic creeping into his features. He slammed on the brakes, and the car jerked to a halt, tires screeching against the pavement.

Without another word, Y/N threw open the door, her hand clutching her stomach as she stumbled out of the car. She barely made it to the side of the road before she was bent over, retching violently.

Her body heaved with the force of it, and for a few moments, it felt like everything was spinning out of control. She was shaking, the cold night air doing nothing to calm the swirling nausea inside her.

And then, through the blur of her vision, she felt a steadying hand on her back.

She turned her head to see Bucky, standing just behind her, his face a mixture of concern and something softer—something she hadn’t expected. He was careful with his touch, the gentleness of his hand on her back sending an unexpected wave of comfort through her.

“Take it slow, Y/N,” Bucky said, his voice calm but laced with a hint of guilt. “Just breathe.”

Y/N blinked rapidly, trying to steady herself. She felt his touch, the warmth of his hand, and it was like the world around her had quieted just enough for her to hear herself think again.

Sam and Steve were still frozen in shock, but Bucky… Bucky was here. Bucky understood, even if things were complicated, even if everything was falling apart.

She straightened, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand, her legs shaky beneath her. Her eyes met Bucky’s, and for a brief moment, something flickered between them—an unspoken understanding.

But that moment was fleeting. His voice broke through, full of concern now, laced with an unwarranted betrayal, a wound.

“Y/N, are you—”

“I’m fine,” she managed, though her voice was hoarse. She looked over at Steve who remained fixated on the road that hat come to a halt, her eyes narrowing slightly. “I just need a minute.” She could feel the weight of his stare into space, the judgment, the disappointment, but right now, all she could focus on was the ache in her chest. The ache that had nothing to do with the sickness in her stomach. The ache of a being inside her, who's father she had told she never wanted to see again. The ache of a man beside her who would have given her the world, knowing she had given what they had to someone else.

And then, her eyes slid to Bucky again, and for just a moment, everything else faded.

[lovingperfectionsblog]

For What It's Worth - Chapter 6

Max Verstappen x Reader

Chapter 6: What line is he willing to cross? 

Chapter summary: Carlos flirts and Max is willing to risk it all to make sure he figures this out properly. 

Warnings: Swearing. 

Word Count: 2791

Authors note: Hello, I’m back, life is slightly less hectic so hello :D This chapter is slightly shorter, it has taken me forever to write and it is a little more hectic, but I am really excited with where this story is heading :D I can’t wait to hear what you all think :)

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______

Lando could hear people shouting for him as he sprinted through the paddock, panting as his feet hit the ground below him, pushing him forward. He would never admit it, but you and Max had made him believe in true love, that there was someone for everyone in this world that so often made you feel alone, that maybe all of those rom-coms might actually be on to something, and since you had made him believe in that, he was going to make sure he played a role in getting you and Max together. 

So he ignored the burn in his lungs and how hard Carlos’driver room door was as he ran into it, forced to spend an extra precious couple of seconds, which Max really depended on, trying to get the door open in his panic. 

Both Lando and Carlos flinched as the door hit the wall from the force that Lando swung it open and from the moment that Lando recovered from the shock, Carlos was subject to an onslaught of information that there was no way he could possibly follow. 

“Slow down!” Carlos attempted to calm his friend down all while rapidly trying to process the information coming from Lando, “Did you just call Y/n hot?”

This finally shut Lando up. 

“Like Max’s Y/n?” The nod surprised Carlos, no one ever called you hot, well, not unless it was in whispered tones far, far, far away from Max. 

“Yes, Jesus, just, were you not paying attention to anything I just said?” Lando swiftly closed the door behind him, strategically standing in front of the slight chip in the wall that now existed.

 “How can anyone pay attention-” he was getting sidetracked, he needed to understand exactly what was happening with you and Lando, “Are you seeing her?”

“Who?” A confused look instantly adorned Landos face as he tried to catch up to Carlo’s question. 

“Y/N, You know, Max’s girl? I gotta know, is it like a shared agreement between the three of you or are you actually seeing Max’s girl behind his back?” Carlos couldn't help the unamused look on his friends face and he couldn't help the small laugh that escaped him as he continued, “Or is this you asking me how to make a move on Max’s girl?”

“Actually, I’m here to warn you that she’s coming to make a move on you.” A smug grin spread across Lando’s face as he watched the panic spread on his friend, “She’s wearing a cute little sundress on top of it, determined to get her man.”

“And she thinks that man is me?” Lando shrugged before relenting and sharing a small amount of information with Carlos. 

“She isn’t sure who it is.” The frustration seeped off of Carlos, “You going to listen to me this time round?” 

“Hurry up or get out.” And so Lado began to explain the entire story, start to finish, rushing through the parts that specifically made Max look really bad, with Carlos asking him to repeat those parts too many times and finally, between the two of them, they came up with a plan. 

One that would be kind to you and let you down easily and maybe get Max to actually make a move on you, and now all they had to do was wait until they ran into you. 

_____

Max could feel his face heat up as he watched you leave the motorhome and he was ushered into yet another meeting. He was torn between desperately trying to get your attention and not wanting to look at you for a second longer because every part of him was losing the battle of not just telling you exactly how he felt. 

How had he gotten himself into this mess, how had he finally been brave enough to say how he felt and then subsequently ended up helping you look for the love of your life? A man that you clearly were more interested in than him. 

“You’re staring” Daniel nudged him as you finally slipped out the motorhome doors, dragging his attention back to the meeting. 

“How can I not? This might be the last time I ever see her without the love of her life on her arm.” Dejection filtered through his voice as he allowed his thoughts to escape him, finally allowing himself to begin the grieving process. 

“Oh, you mean you’re finally going to tell her the truth?” Ever the optimist, Daniel couldn’t help but try and be positive about the situation, knowing deep in his soul that if any two people belonged together, it was you and Max. 

“I need you to stop.” Max couldn’t handle it. 

“Stop what?” Daniel could have guessed what he meant, but he was also willing to take advantage of any opportunity he could to convince Max that all he needed was to be a little brave. 

There was a long silence as Max picked at his nail beds, seeking out any distraction from the truth. 

“Giving me hope.” The loudest Max could get out was a whisper, not risking the crack in his voice. Not risking breaking the waterline of the first tears, of many he assumed, when he truly thought about the ramifications of the situation he could only blame himself for. “Please don’t give me hope when I'm about to watch the only woman I will ever love end up with another driver.”

“All you have to be is honest Max.” The glassy eyes didn’t surprise Daniel like he thought it would, but for the first time Daniel realized just how broken Max was in this situation. What had seemed so obvious, so simple, to Daniel, was completely lost on Max. He truly did not realize that you and him were it. You were always going to be together in the end. To Max, this was the end, and he wasn’t in it with you. 

Before Max could protest an alert sounded on both their phones, the exact same message brightening their screens. 

NoRizz: Okay, don’t be mad. 

NoRizz added Chili.

Maxie: Why would I be mad? 

Chili: Because I’m standing here looking at your girl in that sundress, kind of glad you fucked up. 

Maxie: I’m going to kill you. 

NoRizz: He isn’t going to do anything. 

Chili: You didn’t tell me she looked this good. 

NoRizz: HE ISN’T GOING TO DO ANYTHING. 

BigRicc: Carlos, stay away from her until we get there. 

NoRizz: Too late. 

Maxie: What do you mean too late?

NoRizz: She saw him and now they’re talking. 

BigRicc: So stop them? Get involved in the conversation!

NoRizz: Please don’t make me do that right now. There’s a lot of touching. 

Maxie: So you’re just going to let him take my girl?

NoRizz: I mean, technically she isn’t your girl. 

BigRicc: Jesus Lando.

Maxie: I’m going to kill you. 

Maxie: Both of you. 

Daniel could literally see the water in his glass splashing over as the table shook. Max’s leg bouncing rapidly underneath the table from a combination of anxiety and rage. 

Not a single second of this meeting has been absorbed by Max and it took less then a second before Max was moving out the door of the motorhome with Daniel hot on his heels when Horner dismissed them. He rushed through the paddock frantically searching for you amongst too many people. Normally it was like you were a beacon in any space, he was always drawn to you, like you were inexplicably connected somehow, but now Max felt as if that had been severed. He couldn’t see you. He couldn’t feel you. 

He was suddenly lost. 

Suddenly your laugh rang out through the crowd and Max couldn’t help but stop for a second and admire you.

The sun on your skin as you tilted your head back, laughing at whatever Carlos has said. It didn't even matter that it wasn’t him making you laugh, you just looked so beautiful. 

Maybe he could live with you ending up with Carlos if it meant that he got to see you this happy? 

That goddamn sundress really did look good on you. 

“Carlos! There you are.” Daniel made his way past Max and over to you, glaring at a skittish Lando in the distance. 

“You were looking for me?”  Carlos didn’t even bother taking his eyes off you as he addressed the two other drivers making their way over. 

“ Yeah, I wanted to wish you luck for qualifiers, Max over here is looking pretty angry so I think I’m a little nervous for all of us out there today.”  It was both a threat and a warning to the other driver, one Carlos couldn’t help but laugh at. 

“You’re angry? Why? What's wrong? Did something happen with Horner?” Max softened entirely the moment you turned towards him, concern detached in your brows, his heart fluttered as you placed your palm to his chest, a subconscious habit you had now developed whenever Max was feeling angry or anxious, finding that the physical touch calmed him completely. 

He loved how well you knew him, even if you weren’t completely conscious of just how much you did. 

Suddenly you had turned away from him, leaning closer towards Carlos as he moved to comment. 

“I can only assume he is upset over this whole flower situation.” Confusion replaced concern on your face as Carlos couldn’t help but laugh at the cute expression. 

“Why would Max be angry over the flower situation?” Despite Max’s anxiety, he couldn’t help but smile at the exact same thing Carlos was. The tilt of your head and furrowed brows as you tried to piece together everything that was being said. 

“Because whoever sent those flowers shouldn’t be a coward and just say how he feels instead of making you run all over the grid trying to figure out who it is.”  Daniel offered up as an explanation. 

“So it wasn’t Carlos?” Max was looking directly at the driver just mentioned, the question a lot more layered than what you understood? 

“I did not get her the flowers,” a breath of relief left Max, his hand coming up to wrap around yours, anchoring himself even more in your presence, in your reality. 

He still had a chance. 

“But I did tell her that I had a pretty good idea of who it was.”  Daniel couldn’t help but feel proud of Carlos, this is what Max needed, a little bit of pressure, and they were going to make sure he was getting it from all sides. 

“And he has decided to be cruel and make me wait till he tells me just exactly who it is.” Not even your pout could distract Max from the stare he and Carlos were locked in. Carlos was going to make you wait, which meant Max had some time. 

“He has two weeks.” Two weeks. Max could do two weeks. That was enough time for him to figure this all out, “Unless he pisses me off on the track.” Another threat and warning disguised as a joke. 

Max just gave a slight nod as your head was turned away from him, a promise that he would confess in the next two weeks, a promise that he’d let Carlos win whatever he wanted if he just gave him this time to figure it out.

Max couldn’t help but think about how easy it was to get into match fixing because this entire situation has him willing to throw the entire championship out the window if that's what it took. 

“You're technically Max’s PA right?” Suddenly Lando had popped back up into the conversation. 

“I am, why?” No one liked where this was headed. 

“Could you get us all coffee?” A slap to the back of his head was followed quickly by admonishment from the entire group. 

“My PA, not yours, and she’s not the type of PA to get coffee you dick.” Max had subconsciously moved between you and Lando, challenging him. 

“Redbull, whatever, can she just please?” There was a slight desperation in Lando’s voice prompting Max to give you a pleading look, knowing that he was apologize a million times over after this.

“4 Redbulls coming up.” You rolled your eyes as you moved away from the four men, not missing the very short words Max was having with Lando regarding your treatment.

“Listen, this isn’t about, just, wait, Carlos, why did you flirt like that?” Suddenly all the attention was off of Lando and back on Carlos. 

“You flirted with her?” Daniel let out a sigh so deep it could have only come from the very depths of his soul. 

“After the way Max treated her, she deserved to have her ego boosted a little bit,” it was so obvious and so nonchalant that none of the other drivers could even say anything against it, “Plus, Jesus, that dress.” A groan left Carlos tat every single one of them couldn’t help but agree with, none of them scared of admitting it in front of Max at this point, knowing he had absolutely no leg to stand on until he made a move. 

“At least you can flirt with her.” Max couldn’t help but feel sorry for himself. 

“I mean, you could if you weren’t such a pussy.” The deadpan look he received was physically painful in its truth. 

“And she is really fun to flirt with, she gets this very rosy cheek when you do, at least it starts at her cheeks, eventually her entire chest is pink the more you -” 

“I advise you shut your mouth right now.”  Max couldn’t be damned if Carlos told, he wasn’t prepared to let him sit there and talk about you like that. 

“But apparently Carlos is so good with his mouth?” You blew a kiss towards Carlos and before he could even pretend that he had caught it, Lando had stepped in between you two, wildly moving his arms in the air, an attempt to usher off your blown kiss in another direction. 

“Don’t be gross.” All except Max and Lando laughed at his response. 

“Weren’t you just checking out my boobs all morning at breakfast?” Lando whipped his head towards Max, hyper aware of how red Max’s neck was getting. That was pure rage and Lando did not want to stick around for that. 

“You’ve done me dirty, and now since you have, I am leaving for my meeting early.” He made a big show of huffing as he turned around, urging Carlos to follow him off, all but ready to run if that's what saved his life from Max’s wrath. 

And then there were three of you, silently all deciding that it was time you made your way back to the motorhome. 

“Quali starts soon, I assume you boys need to get ready?” It was more of a statement than a question, you knew they needed to go and you were thankful for a moment to lick your wounds. That was your third rejection of the weekend and you’re not sure how many more of them you could go through. 

Before either of them could nod, you’d made your way to your work studio, ready to get this day over with, leaving Max and Daniel to get ready in their respective drivers rooms. 

As soon as Max had closed the door to his, he fully rested against the table in the middle of the room, attempting to figure out his next move as Carlos’s threat played over in his mind again and again. 

______

“Explain to me exactly how Carlos got that close to you in q3?” Daniel didn’t want to believe Max was willing to actually throw these next two weeks to keep Carlos quiet. 

“The Ferrari is quick.”  Max didn’t feel like talking, instead continuing to shove his clothes into his bag so he could just find you and get back to the hotel. 

“Not that quick. Max, you can’t let him win over some girl.” That stopped Max. 

“Not some girl.” Daniel knew what you were to him so why would this surprise him? 

“This is illegal.” Daniel couldn't believe his ears. There was no way Max was actually going to go easy on Carlos for the next two weeks. 

“I got P1, nothing illegal happened.”  He shoved his wallet into his pants and pulled out his phone ready to call you. 

“And what happens when you get closer to the deadline?” Daniel stopped him just before he could leave, stranded between the safety of the drivers room and the world outside. Stranded between a line that if crossed, he would never deserve to be a driver again. 

“She’s not some girl.” 

_____

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[multi-fandoms-posts]

Unexpected Revelations Part 1

Cherik x reader

Logan x sister!reader

part 2, part 3, last part

It was a quiet evening, and Charles, Erik, and I had decided to spend the evening together. After we had curled up on the sofa, the evening turned into an intimate moment where we grew closer. Our conversations grew quieter, and the atmosphere between us became increasingly familiar. Charles and Erik held me gently in their arms, and we simply enjoyed being close to each other.

As the mood between us grew more intimate, something unexpected happened: the door creaked open, and Logan walked in without warning. He was visibly surprised, and his eyes widened in shock. "What the...?" he exclaimed as he saw the scene before him.

I immediately jumped up, though we were still dressed, and covered myself reflexively, my heart racing. "Logan! What are you doing here?" I asked in shock, as he hadn’t told me he was coming by.

Logan stared at us with a look of anger and disappointment. "What is this?" he asked loudly, his voice trembling with anger. "You told me it was just a friendship, and now I see what’s really going on!" Logan said angrily.

Erik and Charles, who had quickly moved away from me, also stood up, their faces showing a mix of shock and anger. "That’s enough, Logan," Erik said, his voice firm and threatening. "You have no reason to treat us this way," Erik said.

Charles stepped forward as well, his face serious and determined. "You can’t just barge in and confront us like this. If you have questions, you can ask us respectfully, but not like this."

Logan looked from Erik to Charles, and then back to me. "I feel betrayed. I never thought you would hide something like this from me. I just wanted to make sure my sister was being treated well, and this..." Logan trailed off.

"This is not something you can judge," Charles interrupted him. "We care for Y/N and have always strived to make her happy. Your intrusion and anger don’t help anyone."

Erik nodded in agreement. "You need to give us a chance to explain the whole truth instead of just getting angry. We’re not enemies; we’re people who love and respect Y/N," Erik explained calmly.

Logan took a deep breath, and his anger seemed to subside somewhat, though he still looked upset. "It’s just hard for me to process all of this. I really wish I had known earlier."

I slowly approached Logan. "I’m sorry you found out like this. I didn’t mean to lie to you, but it was complicated to find the right time to explain everything," I said with a calm voice.

Logan closed his eyes and sighed deeply. "I understand that it’s complicated. I’ll try to think it through and accept it," Logan said.

Charles stepped closer and placed a hand on Logan’s shoulder. "We’re willing to talk openly about everything if you have questions. But we also expect you to respect us and not intrude on our private moments," Charles said.

Logan finally nodded and turned towards the door. "Okay. I’ll try. But I need time to process all of this," Logan said.

As Logan left the room, Charles, Erik, and I let out a deep breath. The tense atmosphere was still palpable, but we knew we had to face the challenge of rebuilding trust and showing that our relationship was strong and honest.

We sat back down on the sofa, and Erik gently pulled me into his arms. "That was tough," he said quietly. "But we’ll get through this together," Erik said.

Charles nodded and gave a faint smile. "We just need to be patient and give him the time he needs. It will all work out," Charles said.

With those words, we tried to end the evening on a hopeful note, hoping that the coming days would clear up the situation and bring our relationships back into harmony.

[peachhcs]

I feel like James would confide with Gabe and Ryan about Hannah and the draft. I think that he would want someone who he’s not related to, and that’s older than him, to talk to. It makes it better because they’re both in relationships and they’ve been through the draft process.

oh he totally would bc they’re all so close and gabe and ryan look after james and teddy like they are their younger brothers or something

au masterlist

the conte locker room was low and slow for a thursday afternoon before practice. the tough loss yesterday sent a lot of the boys into silence as they either sat with their own thoughts knowing there was a hard practice ahead or just found their own corner to occupy their minds.

gabe and ryan were talking quietly in their own corner when james came into the room. his gaze swept over the quiet room and stopped when he met the older boys’ glance.

“hey haggy,” gabe smiled and waved the younger brunette over.

“hey gp, hey lean,” james sat down with them while pushing his headphones down so he could hear them.

“how you doing? feeling okay?” gabe asked in regards to the game last night and the huge upset when providence beat them.

“i’m okay. the loss hurts, but not much we can do about it now i guess,” james shrugged.

“you win some you lose some. it definitely hurts, but we just bounce back stronger in a week,” ryan said while gabe nodded in agreement.

a soft, comfortable silence hung in the air between the three while the older boys continued taping up their sticks. james’ mind wandered a bit thinking about all the other things that had been lingering besides the game last night. he thought of hannah probably preparing for her meet in a few hours and how focused she always got hours before meets that she hardly ever answered her text messages.

james had gotten a few this morning, but after, her responses got pretty sparse. he was used to this because she always stopped answering the closer the meet got, but sometimes he did wish she was just a little more present—or at least let someone else in when she got super into her head. the boy tried to not take it too personally because hannah did it with everyone, but even when he was there in person watching, she hardly gave him a second glance.

it wasn’t to say james wasn’t the same before games. he always got pretty dialed in, but not enough that he just completely disregarded everyone around him.

there was still some tweaks to their dynamic they were trying to figure out.

“got something on your mind, haggy?” ryan noticed the lost look on the freshman’s face. james’ eyes snapped to his, a flush coating his cheeks.

“oh, no. not really. just..a mix of everything,” the boy mumbled and brushed the two off.

“i dunno if it’s weird, but we’re always willing to listen if you need someone. we don’t bite,” ryan chuckled a bit making the younger boy smile.

“i dunno if it’s really one thing, you know? just a lot of stuff. hannah. hockey. college. the draft. it’s all just running through my mind at once,” james explained kind of poorly but there wasn’t really one right way to explain what was going on up there.

“how is duker? we don’t hear much from her these days unless samy brings her up,” gabe wondered.

“she’s good. she’s focused on gymnastics. got a big meet today against michigan state,” james nodded.

“i can’t believe you guys are dating. i never would’ve seen it coming,” gabe laughed and the younger brunette flushed.

“yeah, how’d you even pull that anyway? duker never got involved in serious relationships like ever when we were younger,” ryan raised his eyebrow.

james shrugged, “honestly, i don’t even know how i did. i did chase her for like two years.”

“hey, props to you though. you knew what you wanted and kept after it,” the older brunette patted james’ arm.

“i guess we’re still trying to figure out that boyfriend-girlfriend dynamic.”

“things not going well?” gabe prodded just a little bit based on the expression he saw on his friend’s face.

“no, no, they are. it’s been great. i guess like..i dunno you guys probably know this because you grew up with her and were closer with her, but she’s very independent. like hates when people do things for her or leaning on other people for support. i guess it’s something i’m trying to figure out with her,” james opened up a bit and the two boys slowly nodded.

“ah, yeah. hannah is pretty independent. she always hated asking for help—i mean samy and hannah were the exact same in that aspect growing up. i guess like..it’s just something you have to keep talking about and making sure she knows you’re always there for her,” gabe said.

“is there anything specific?” ryan added.

“well i guess like today, she has the meet. whenever she has meets she like totally ignores everyone and gets into her own world and head. like..we haven’t talked since this morning. i dunno, it’s not a huge deal, but she always pushes everyone away for some reason and i haven’t figured out how to crack that yet,” james explained and glanced at his phone like a message would appear but none did.

“yeah, that is kind of hard. i think you just gotta keep being there for her you know and she’ll finally realize there is someone who cares. she’ll come around eventually. you can always talk to samy too since she knows her the best out of any of us,” ryan said and the younger hockey player nodded.

“yeah, you’re right. thanks. i appreciate the advice. it feels like everything’s been like a lot lately with hockey and life,” james admitted to which the older boys frowned a bit.

“hey, it definitely gets tough, but just try and keep your head up. you’re on a lot of people’s watch lists,” gabe encouraged which made james flush.

“i’ve heard.”

“you’re gonna be a big deal, haggy. first overall would be pretty insane, but you deserve it. you’ve been working really hard,” ryan added which didn’t help the younger boy’s bright cheeks.

“how’d you guys handle all of it? the pressure and stuff?”

“i mean there isn’t really a right way to handle it, but just making sure you don’t let those news outlets get into your head too much. what they know is irrelevant for the most part. only you know you,” gabe said and ryan nodded.

“it’s a lot, but also really rewarding so just make sure you have your people to lean on if it does get to be too much. we were definitely overwhelmed but excited all at the same time,” the older brunette smiled.

“it’s gonna work out, haggy, don’t worry. you can always poke will about stuff too. or even mack. mack would definitely know how you’re feeling,” gabe patted his friend’s shoulder.

“thanks, guys. i appreciate it,” james nodded. he was glad he had teammates like them who were always willing to offer advice or help out. it was really easy to see why the fans really liked them too.

after practice, james watched hannah’s meet highlights where she had finally texted him. he was quick to praise how well she did while they talked on the phone while also trying to ease the girl’s mind as she picked apart all of her mistakes to him.

“han, you did amazing. you scored a near perfect 10,” james said softly.

“i know, i know. i guess..i’m just in my head. i’m sorry. how was your practice?” the girl shook her head.

“don’t apologize for being in your head. i get it. it was fine though. coach was rough on us, but we expected it,” the boy shrugged.

“sorry, j. you guys are gonna get ‘em next time, i know it,” hannah grinned widely and james smiled as well seeing her bright smile through the screen.

“maybe this warrants a visit soon? i think you’re my good luck charm,” he flirted a bit which made the duke sister blush.

“how charming. maybe i can pull something off,” the two exchanged warm, loving grins.

not hearing from her for hours leading up to her meet was always worth it in the end when james got to talk to her afterwards and see that smile he loved so much, especially when it was directed at him.

[little-emerald-snake]

Are you still taking requests? Would you do double penetration f!mc one in her p one in her backdoor? Could be with Leander and garreth or Ominis and Sebastian take your pick

Double the Gryffindor’s - Garreth Weasley X Leander Prewett X F!MC

🔥 NSFW 🔞 MDNI

Warnings: threesome m/m/f, FWB, double penetration, unprotected p-in-v, unprotected anal sex

1k words

Garreth had always had a soft spot for his roommate and best friend, Leander. When Leander had come to him, confiding that he was feeling pent up and horny, constantly having to evacuate the room when Garreth had his fuck buddy over, Garreth felt a bit sorry.

At first he’d thought about maybe taking Leander to the pub to find him a lass to hook up with. But after thinking more about it, he’d decided to instead have a chat with his fwb to see if she’d be down for a threesome.

She’d hesitated at first but eventually agreed when Garreth had described his plan, when he’d been so excited explaining it to her she didn’t have the heart to deny him.

Leander wasn’t bad looking or anything, but there had always been a certain…stigma surrounding him that he was whiny and snobbish. Yet all the experiences she’d had with him had been pleasant, willing to leave his and Garreth’s shared dorm so they could have the privacy to hook up whenever they pleased.

When she’d arrived the next day, Leander had already begun reaching for a book, gathering his things to evacuate the room for them. Garreth grinned from ear to ear at the look on his best mate's face when she’d simply wagged her finger at his roommate, pointing back at the bed he’d stood up from.

He did as she instructed, confused albeit refusing to say anything. “What’s going on? I thought you’d be coming over to get cozy with Garreth. Are you guys going somewhere else today?”

She shook her head, grinning as she grabbed the book from his hand, setting it aside to his bedside table before pushing against the center of his chest till he laid back on the rumpled red duvet of his bed.

She climbed up to straddle his lap, watching with a smile as he blinked, mouth trying to form words desperately. “Not today, Lee. I wanna play with you today. We both do, actually.”

Leander’s eyes shot to Garreth who leaned against the bed post of his own bed, sleeves rolled up to his elbows, waving with his fingers. “That’s right mate. Said you’ve been pent up lately, right? I thought maybe I’d share my favorite little stress reliever. She’s happy to oblige, as you can see.”

Leander’s glance snapped back to her and she sat, straddling his waist innocently. He took a shaky breath, trying to process what was happening. “I-is this your way of playing some fucked up prank on me, Gaz?”

Garreth pushed off his bed post, coming to stand at the foot of Leander’s bed, fingers gripping onto the top of the wooden frame. “No pranks, mate. I genuinely want to share. Figured I could get you laid and fulfill a little fantasy I have all in one go. If you’re down, that is.”

Leander swallowed and much to his horror, the girl in his lap shifted, sliding back to see the tenting of his pants. “Damn, Lee. You might be bigger than Garreth here.”

Leander’s mouth popped open in surprise and Garreth chuckled, coming around to stand behind her. “Hey now, don’t start slamming me when I’ve given you rights to get dicked down by my best mate.”

She giggled, turning back to Leander who still laid open mouthed below her. “So, Lee. Are you down or not? Because I’d really like to feel all this…” she caressed his cock through his trousers. “inside of me tonight.”

Leander peered over her shoulder to Garreth, who nodded at him with a genuine smile. His eyes met hers again and she gave him a lusty smile, still caressing him through his pants. “Y-yea. I guess I’d be down. How exactly will this work…we take turns or something?”

Garreth chuckled, leaning over her and pushing her skirt up. Leander’s mouth went dry. “Nope. I’m gonna fuck her ass and you’re gonna fuck her tight little cunt.”

She worked his pants open, not minding as Garreth slid her panties down and helped her out of them. “H-have you ever-“

She pulled his pants down, exposing his length which bobbed needily. “Have I ever taken two cocks? No. Have I done anal? Yes. Garreth is an ass man above all else.”

Garreth spanked her playfully, while undoing his pants with his free hand. “Don’t act like you don’t love it sweetheart. There’s no denying you’re a good little anal slut when I need you to be.”

She hummed in satisfaction, sliding herself across Leander’s stiffened length for friction. “Gods, you feel so good, Lee. Need to feel you…”

Leander looked absolutely dizzy below her, face red as he watched her grind against his cock. When she reached down and slid him inside his head tipped back. A gasp spilled past her lips and she slid all the way down his cock.

Garreth groaned at the sight, using a wandless lubrication charm before sliding himself between her cheeks. “You’re little pussy looks so good wrapped around his cock, sweetheart. Gonna look positively divine speared on both our cocks.”

She went starry eyed, so full from both of them that her lips popped open with a moan. “S-so full. All that talk about bravery with you Gryffindor’s but no mention of incredible cocks.”

Garreth grinned, thrusting gently which had her rocking forward on Leander. “Holy shit. Can feel him filling your pussy, making your ass even tighter for me.”

She clenched down, which tore a moan from Leander, who reached up to grab her hips and thrust into her. All three of them groaned in unison. Garreth and Leander worked together and got into a rhythm, grinding into her, against each other. She was pleasantly unraveling between them, giving into the intense pleasure they wrung from every last bit of her, sending her to multiple shaking orgasms.

Garrath was the first to finish, filling her ass with his cum before pulling out and sitting back to watch as she rode Leander. Garreth groaned, watching as his cum dripped down to her pussy and mixed with her juices.

She rode Leander till he stilled deep inside of her, climax hitting him like a tsunami and dragging her to another shaking orgasm in the process.

The two settled with her collapsed on his chest, both panting in an attempt to regain breath. Garreth, now cleaned up and fully clothed, came to lay beside them on the bed. “I think we should get into some more fun like this more often, what do you guys think?”

[stormblessed95]

Hi!

I was slightly disappointed to find such short answers to some parts, but it was nice to see that there is a lot we seem to agree on (outside of whether to trust Jimin's words about love.... 😭).

I don’t know if it was the way I wrote or because you only answered some sections of my ask, but it seems that a lot of my thoughts were not understood or that people were projecting frustrations from other parties (tkkers, antis, insecure jkkers) onto me…

I want to make a few things clear before I delve into the responses 😃

I’m not against the “search for his inspiration/excitement with his art” theory

I don’t think that Jimin knows nothing about love in general

I am not analyzing MUSE through a shipping lens or to debunk Jikook

I am not dictating Jimin’s sexuality based on pronouns in a song

Anyways I’m going to go person by person, starting with Storm ofc!

Why is he releasing this in the military? I’d understand if he was planning on revealing a partner, but based on what Jimin, the producers, and WHO are saying, he’s single. So is he announcing that he’s looking for love once he’s discharged? Then we go back to it being assumed that he is already single… and not going to lie, that is a little strange to announce? Why make an entire album for that?

I don't think he is announcing anything exactly. Like it's not a release meant to be for an announcement. If that makes sense. He isn't trying to inform people he is single and/or ready to mingle. He is trying to share emotions and a story. Why during MS? Idk.

I don’t either necessarily, but the narrative that has been pushed by many based on his words and the song is that he is “lookin for love”, so I was wondering why he would do it this way and at this time if so (hypothetically)? I did state multiple times that I can see it as him sharing his emotions through some sort of story!

He may have used the concept of love to better articulate another deeper message

With this in mind, as well as the fact that BOTH Jimin and Namjoon talked about Jimin’s work, singing, and idol identity more than anything to do with love, made the idea that search for love = search for his inspiration/excitement with his art more possible

While Jimin still could be working through the idea of a concept about his inspiration

 He could have been using the feeling of not having that excitement to compare being alone….

With SGMB, the confusion for me was more about them mentioning it being about “expressing the process” and being conceptual after I had thoughts about WHO being more personal.

I really liked your take on the title of MUSE and relating it to inspiration and the Muses of Greek Mythology. It fits in line with what we’ve seen from Jimin, as well as what I was initially expecting.

The search for his inspiration and a version of himself that he’s fully satisfied with seemed likely to be the concept of MUSE.

If he is explaining his search for inspiration through the idea of romance, that is incredibly smart and endearing of him. It shows me how much his work and art matter to him. That he’s willing to work on bettering himself (even if I thought he was already amazing) to achieve even better results that he can truly be proud of.

Hearing that MUSE was born after Jimin was so excited to work on music, especially considering the darker topics discussed in FACE, makes me so unbelievably happy. The songs ending up as upbeat and hopeful, even romantic, really does make sense in that context.

It's true that conceptual doesn’t have to mean fake, but the question I’m often left with is “In what way is this album conceptual?” Is it his search for inspiration and excitement of his work through a romantic lens OR is it his search for his person through a made up love story?

So is he not LOOKING FOR A WOMAN? Or is he not SINGLE?

Is the album not about his LOVE LIFE but his work?

Because ANY of those would actually make more sense to misunderstand.

If it’s directly about Jimin and not just the concept of the song.

Jimin mentions that when he meets up with friends, they’re all feeling similarly flat. I wonder if that flatness is towards not being in a relationship or feeling uninspired with life and/or work? He goes on to say it’s not a sad or scary feeling, but it’s also not exciting. This could go for either concept (Love or Work) to be honest.

I’ve read through multiple analyses of the MV since my first viewing, and I’ve noticed a lot more details that are somewhat questionable.

Auto Calibration being the main one as it flashes on screen after Jimin dances with men and then leads into him dancing with women. This does give some queer vibes, and makes me interested in what “story” Jimin had in mind with WHO as the choreo also has similar vibes too.

Jimin also keeps mentioning the choreo feeling like a short film or musical, which makes all the film (play, pause, rewind) details in the MV fit.

His conversations with his friends come up again, about how there are few instances to feel really strong emotions and him thinking “Should I start feeling more passion?” while making WHO, and that the writers of WHO worded the story he wanted to tell in such a lovely way.

The choreo has a lot of fun theatrical elements as he seems to want to express a lot of picturesque scenes, and the dance suits him while being simpler and fresh. But he’s still concerned about how to express the emotions for this song, as it isn't a sad song, but it does kind of become one towards the end.

With the amount of story elements, I’m considering the song being more of a way to describe his feelings about needing passion in his life than a detailed recount of his “failing love life”. It’s still his thoughts and feelings, but maybe expressed in a more digestible way for the audience.

“He’s an Idol, of course he’ll say he’s single and doesn’t know what love is!” Ok, but why mention it at all?

Because with the concept and theme being what they are, it would be discussed to hell and back (low-key hello is us in this post) and it's "damage control" regardless of how I feel about that, it's most likely what it is. No matter how annoying

While I understand that, it does feel really weird and wrong just chopping up him, potentially, expressing his feelings as “damage control” though…

I could maybe see Jimin not being out to his producers (or more so with his possible relationship with Jungkook), but it’s also not hard to just take him at his word (via the producers) that he’s unfamiliar with romantic love.

I personally don't form my opinions too much based on things that are second hand. I still take them into account for sure. But I don't put too much stock into things that are via someone else on behalf of any of BTS. Because really, they can just say anything. Now don't take this as me dismissing things said, because I'm not. I'm just clarifying for everyone that I form 85% of my opinions ONLY on things that are direct from Jimin himself and based directly on Jimin's actions. Things are going to be influenced by personal bias always as well too

I’ve stated that the things the producers have said don’t really make sense in line with what Jimin has said, which is part of my confusion. But at the same time, saying “the producers are lying/wrong” when they actually know and have spoken to Jimin, is a little weird for me.

But I'm honestly more and more confused the more people talk about this album.

The producers say the album is about looking for some imaginary woman, while every song other than WHO is gender neutral. Even with WHO, we are shown a version that was gender neutral.

So why is Jimin not following that?

Most (if not all) of what I hear him talk about in relation to MUSE is gender neutral. I don’t have an issue with Jimin making love songs about women, but make it consistent with the rest of the album that THEY (Jimin and Producers) wrote then!

I could maybe see Jimin not being out to his producers (or more so with his possible relationship with Jungkook)

Now @roamingwildflower13

It is not about blurring the lines between what we think of his relationship status, it's about him as an artist. It's not fair to take his work and analyse it through a shipping lens, or as if he is Taylor Swift. He might have set a precedent for this with Face, by saying it is personal, but even then, he never gave explicit detail on those songs.

I was simply just trying to understand the concept of the album, and was confused if it was to be viewed conceptually as a whole or just the tracks that Jimin wrote (everything but WHO), after things said by both Jimin and the producers.

The only time I thought about Jikook in relation to MUSE was after contemplating if WHO was Jimin’s real feelings and if he might not be in a relationship like I had assumed.

For me also, his conversation with Namjoon is of more weight than anything else said in the recording studio, and by producers. As Stormy said, second hand narratives are not from his own words, they are an interpretation. And that is not even taking into account any translation issues, or the fact that footage from the behinds of the recording is cut in certain places, the conversation jumbled.

I have stated that Jimin and Namjoon’s conversation in MMM is a good explanation for the “work/inspiration” theory.

I went back to watch MMM immediately, and was almost horrified at how I managed to miss or maybe interpret parts of Jimin and Namjoon’d conversation differently

With this in mind, as well as the fact that BOTH Jimin and Namjoon talked about Jimin’s work, singing, and idol identity more than anything to do with love, made the idea that search for love = search for his inspiration/excitement with his art more possible

Like I said above, after going back and paying attention to what they were saying (I literally typed out the entire video to go over 💀), the search for his inspiration and a version of himself that he’s fully satisfied with seemed likely to be the concept of MUSE.

But Jimin and the producers mentioning Jimin’s difficulty with talking about romantic love confused me.

So I know a lot of people have been using the “pretend to go through experiences I haven’t had before” to explain the “looking for love” vibes of WHO, but my understanding of Jimin saying this was that it’s towards the first five tracks (where he sings about having a crush and falling in love). While both relate to it being a concept, it being about the rest of the album (the love part) does make it sound like he’s currently single.

With SGMB, the confusion for me was more about them mentioning it being about “expressing the process” and being conceptual after I had thoughts about WHO being more personal.

Now I wonder if they meant the process of falling in love.

The producers say the album is about looking for some imaginary woman, while every song other than WHO is gender neutral. Even with WHO, we are shown a version that was gender neutral.

Most (if not all) of what I hear him talk about in relation to MUSE is gender neutral. I don’t have an issue with Jimin making love songs about women, but make it consistent with the rest of the album that THEY (Jimin and Producers) wrote then!

According to the producers, the song was born out of Jimin having trouble relating to a love serenade they were trying to write initially, and thus ends up asking himself if he can ever really love someone. With the song apparently being about the reality of feeling lonely and melancholy, and asking yourself where the person for you is , it does make me think that he hasn’t been in a long term romantic relationship for years, if it’s directly about Jimin and not just the concept of the song.

I do want to take Jimin and Jungkook’s words and actions seriously, however part of what has been said about MUSE and WHO from Jimin and his producers, does make me question if I (and the rest of us) were mistaken about what the nature of their bond is.

That aside, Jimin getting ‘embarrassed’ over this is not really anything to go by, he could get shy when trying to explain to strangers, any part of his concept or feelings. Again, he is not going to tell strangers his innermost thoughts, or the actual truth of it all.

That section was me explaining WHY I felt confused/concerned about these statements Jimin made at the time of watching the Behind The Scenes for MUSE/WHO. These aren’t necessarily my final opinions nor do I think my assumptions are completely correct. My entire ask was just me going over my genuine thought process with MUSE. Not with exact conclusions, because I’m still confused.

I wanted to articulate exactly what my thoughts and concerns were, especially since this is a more serious topic regarding Jimin’s work and art, but I don’t think it came off that well before.

I’m not stuck on any of my assumptions or thoughts being the “correct” way to interpret MUSE

Looking back now, I don’t think I presented WHY I was so conflicted after that video that well in my initial ask.

I’m still confused, but I do think after reviewing things that there is more to MUSE than I think. Especially with stories and theatrics being involved in so much of the concept.

I really just want to know what MUSE is about. The misunderstanding thing was fun for like a couple days, now it just makes me anxious and stressed. But maybe it was supposed to be like this 😔

So, if you listen to his words to Joon, ‘Who’ became the song that reflected how he was feeling about his work, his passion, after Face. I think he recorded ‘Who’ in April when he was in NYC, but it also could have been March, when he was there for Fallon, but I think April. So, those were his words to Joon, that no he wasn’t really feeling ‘happy’ about his work at that time, after Face promo had ended, he literally explained this. Again, taking what he said to a close and trusted friend, about what was said in a recording studio with a translator and strangers, and second hand from producers.

BOTH the producers and I are talking about Jimin being happy about working on FACE, not MUSE. The darker topics discussed in FACE had me slightly concerned for Jimin, so to hear that he was actually happy while making FACE was relieving. That happiness about creating FACE being what inspired MUSE is part of why I am actually more committed to the “search for inspiration/excitement for work” theory. The only reason that I had/have doubts was/is Jimin and the producers mentioning Jimin not being able to relate to romantic love.

Hearing that MUSE was born after Jimin was so excited to work on music, especially considering the darker topics discussed in FACE, makes me so unbelievably happy. The songs ending up as upbeat and hopeful, even romantic, really does make sense in that context.

Pdogg: A lot of people felt depressed during the pandemic, and Jimin was no exception. He took his passion and appetite while holed up at home and channeled it into his music. I remember Jimin was so happy being in LA to record “Set Me Free Pt. 2” in the warm, sunny weather. (laughs) So it seems like working on FACE helped him feel better and helped lift his feelings. The idea behind MUSE was to express what he had felt then. That’s why all the songs ended up being upbeat and hopeful, even romantic.

While Jimin still could be working through the idea of a concept about his inspiration, when he says “It feels like someone found my diary”, to me it really did sound more personal to him than expected.

With this in mind, as well as the fact that BOTH Jimin and Namjoon talked about Jimin’s work, singing, and idol identity more than anything to do with love, made the idea that search for love = search for his inspiration/excitement with his art more possible.

If he is explaining his search for inspiration through the idea of romance, that is incredibly smart and endearing of him. It shows me how much his work and art matter to him. That he’s willing to work on bettering himself (even if I thought he was already amazing) to achieve even better results that he can truly be proud of.

With the amount of story elements, I’m considering the song being more of a way to describe his feelings about needing passion in his life than a detailed recount of his “failing love life”. It’s still his thoughts and feelings, but maybe expressed in a more digestible way for the audience.

Then the Behinds for Muse dropped….

Which led to my first ask:

https://stormblessed95.tumblr.com/post/758126579695190016/hi-ok-so-i-just-rewrote-everything-i-wanted-to

However Jimin talking about looking for love and not experiencing that, does make me question Jikook if this album is supposed to be speaking from Jimin’s personal experiences and/or thoughts.

So I know a lot of people have been using the “pretend to go through experiences I haven’t had before” to explain the “looking for love” vibes of WHO, but my understanding of Jimin saying this was that it’s towards the first five tracks (where he sings about having a crush and falling in love). While both relate to it being a concept, it being about the rest of the album (the love part) does make it sound like he’s currently single.

While Jimin still could be working through the idea of a concept about his inspiration, when he says “It feels like someone found my diary”, to me it really did sound more personal to him than expected.

Yes, technically he does LIVE ALONE or he could have been using the feeling of not having that excitement to being alone….

But I'm curious as to what he meant by “everyone’s just living alone, right?” within the context of WHO, MUSE, or even in general?

With SGMB, the confusion for me was more about them mentioning it being about “expressing the process” and being conceptual after I had thoughts about WHO being more personal.

Now I wonder if they meant the process of falling in love.

But I'm honestly more and more confused the more people talk about this album.

The producers say the album is about looking for some imaginary woman, while every song other than WHO is gender neutral. Even with WHO, we are shown a version that was gender neutral.

So why is Jimin not following that?

Most (if not all) of what I hear him talk about in relation to MUSE is gender neutral. I don’t have an issue with Jimin making love songs about women, but make it consistent with the rest of the album that THEY (Jimin and Producers) wrote then!

According to the producers, the song was born out of Jimin having trouble relating to a love serenade they were trying to write initially, and thus ends up asking himself if he can ever really love someone. With the song apparently being about the reality of feeling lonely and melancholy, and asking yourself where the person for you is , it does make me think that he hasn’t been in a long term romantic relationship for years, if it’s directly about Jimin and not just the concept of the song.

I do want to take Jimin and Jungkook’s words and actions seriously, however part of what has been said about MUSE and WHO from Jimin and his producers, does make me question if I (and the rest of us) were mistaken about what the nature of their bond is.

I think part of the reason that it's important to me to know if Jimin is legitimately saying he’s single, is that I do want to respect him and his words.

Add Letter added into that, and I am not going to state anything other than, no it is not a song for fans, it is a ‘fan’ song, for the person doing background vocals. Go talk to a wall.

First of all, watch your tone.

Secondly, I was implying that Letter wasn’t for fans 💀

Why is Closer Than This on the album? I’m desperately hoping it’s not some sick way of saying “At least I got ARMY”..... and then what is Letter for?

Especially because Jimin refers to “Closer Than This” as a letter to fans even though he already wrote one "for them"…

JM: (Closer Than This) Just think of it as a letter I’m writing to you all. It’s a song just for you.

The show being released not a month after Muse worked the opposite way to me than what you are saying in your ask. It solidified everything I already knew/thought.

I’m confused as to what you assume I thought of Are You Sure?!

Part of me was also curious if my thoughts on MUSE would change how I saw Jikook in Are You Sure. Honestly my surprise when I didn’t find anything that pointed to them breaking up or being just platonic, was nothing compared to seeing that my opinion was uncommon to quite a few in the Jikook Community….

So no, anon, Jimin does know what love is, he actually seems to love with his whole being, and it is important to him to value and care for people, he’s said this before.

NOWHERE IN MY ASK DID I SAY THAT JIMIN DOES NOT KNOW WHAT LOVE IN GENERAL IS!

I WAS REFERRING TO ROMANTIC LOVE 💀💀

Then as the track titles were revealed to be more romantic sounding, it felt like he may have used the concept of love to better articulate another deeper message. Or that he chose to write about a fictional love and focused more on vocal and production styles, in a similar way to what Jungkook did with Golden.

While watching the MMM video for the first time, I was confused because Jimin had mentioned MUSE being more vague (or conceptual) than FACE but that WHO was his “feelings” after the previous tracks. Ultimately, I took that as him wanting to write about love but not having current personal experiences to pull from, so he decided to make up a fictional love story/crush, and then WHO comes at the end being like “actually that’s not true. i’m not in love, though i want to be.”

So I know a lot of people have been using the “pretend to go through experiences I haven’t had before” to explain the “looking for love” vibes of WHO, but my understanding of Jimin saying this was that it’s towards the first five tracks (where he sings about having a crush and falling in love). While both relate to it being a concept, it being about the rest of the album (the love part) does make it sound like he’s currently single.

With SGMB, the confusion for me was more about them mentioning it being about “expressing the process” and being conceptual after I had thoughts about WHO being more personal.

Now I wonder if they meant the process of falling in love.

I’m happy though that even while in this search (whether for inspiration, satisfaction, or love) that he’s still able to be happy and content with where he is at and who he is.

It's true that conceptual doesn’t have to mean fake, but the question I’m often left with is “In what way is this album conceptual?” Is it his search for inspiration and excitement of his work through a romantic lens OR is it his search for his person through a made up love story?

The idea of most of the album being love songs about a made up relationship/crush just to be like “I’m actually single and alone!”, does frustrate me a little. Like he’s an Idol, it’s already assumed that he’s single.

According to the producers, the song was born out of Jimin having trouble relating to a love serenade they were trying to write initially, and thus ends up asking himself if he can ever really love someone. With the song apparently being about the reality of feeling lonely and melancholy, and asking yourself where the person for you is , it does make me think that he hasn’t been in a long term romantic relationship for years, if it’s directly about Jimin and not just the concept of the song.

I could maybe see Jimin not being out to his producers (or more so with his possible relationship with Jungkook), but it’s also not hard to just take him at his word (via the producers) that he’s unfamiliar with romantic love.

Jimin mentions that when he meets up with friends, they’re all feeling similarly flat. I wonder if that flatness is towards not being in a relationship or feeling uninspired with life and/or work? He goes on to say it’s not a sad or scary feeling, but it’s also not exciting. This could go for either concept (Love or Work) to be honest.

With the amount of story elements, I’m considering the song being more of a way to describe his feelings about needing passion in his life than a detailed recount of his “failing love life”. It’s still his thoughts and feelings, but maybe expressed in a more digestible way for the audience.

If he is being up front about his romantic past, then I really do hope he finds his person, whoever they might be.

I know Jimin, and all idols, needs to be careful when talking about love. It’s why I’m so confused as to why this concept, and why now? Though with Jin stating that he wrote Falling for someone, maybe this is just part of BTS being more honest and open.

A bit of mystery goes a long way when all is said and done. Potentially Knowing everything about every lyrics meaning, and picking apart the song, takes away from that somewhat. And as above, we may never know the truth of it all, in fact that is more likely, than ever knowing where Jimin is concerned honestly.

I was using what both Jimin and the Producers said about the song to form somewhat of an opinion on what the song is about and/or how it was created.

According to the producers, the song was born out of Jimin having trouble relating to a love serenade they were trying to write initially, and thus ends up asking himself if he can ever really love someone. With the song apparently being about the reality of feeling lonely and melancholy, and asking yourself where the person for you is , it does make me think that he hasn’t been in a long term romantic relationship for years, if it’s directly about Jimin and not just the concept of the song.

Jimin mentions that when he meets up with friends, they’re all feeling similarly flat. I wonder if that flatness is towards not being in a relationship or feeling uninspired with life and/or work? He goes on to say it’s not a sad or scary feeling, but it’s also not exciting. This could go for either concept (Love or Work) to be honest.

Really the only things I analyzed were the MV and the choreo.

Auto Calibration being the main one as it flashes on screen after Jimin dances with men and then leads into him dancing with women. This does give some queer vibes, and makes me interested in what “story” Jimin had in mind with WHO as the choreo also has similar vibes too.

Jimin mentioning people instead of just women as potential options when passing by is also interesting, especially when he has mostly talked about this album gender neutrally.

The billboard with SOMEONE’S EYES dropping after Jimin sings “Who is my heart waiting for?” does seem as though it's an answer for Jimin, or maybe others. Especially when WHO with NO QUESTION MARK and Keep Going are written on it. In my opinion, it does resemble Jungkook's eyes. But I find it hard to take it as a promotion of some sort when it quite literally interrupts the MV, seemingly for no reason, instead of being a poster in the back.

Then of course, there is the insane potential connection of Taeyang, someone Jimin is a known fan of and is now friends with, showcasing his then girlfriend (now wife) on a billboard in a MV….

During a Chorus part Jimin joins up with SIX OTHER MEN. I don’t know if this is supposed to be a BTS reference or just formations. But what is the point of having SIX when there is only FIVE later for the girls vs boys part? Why not just keep the seven men (including Jimin) and have seven girls? Where’d the other guy even go?

Next in Verse Two when Jimin sings about “taking her places they ain’t found yet, putting it all on the line, and being that someone she can count on”, he dances with two men. Why? Would it not be better for him to do some sort of partner choreo here?

In the bridge, he repeats “who is my heart, heart waiting for?” as he passes by BOTH WOMEN AND MEN. Sure he only tries to match with women, but he’s a kpop idol and the song uses female pronouns, so that’s expected. I’m sure the male dancers were most likely included just to have it look better, but considering Jimin saying people when talking about it, the gender neutral version of the song, and that Jimin was involved with the choreo, it’s something to consider!

Jimin also keeps mentioning the choreo feeling like a short film or musical, which makes all the film (play, pause, rewind) details in the MV fit.

I am a bit disappointed that he, once again, warned fans about him interacting with women in the choreo. Even to the point of saying “moments that you might find uncomfortable” and “please don’t be too disappointed”

The choreo has a lot of fun theatrical elements as he seems to want to express a lot of picturesque scenes, and the dance suits him while being simpler and fresh. But he’s still concerned about how to express the emotions for this song, as it isn't a sad song, but it does kind of become one towards the end.

And if THAT is what you’re going to use against me….

Which is why to me the ‘Who’ mv is important. Jimin told Joon he almost wanted a simple shoot – and I guess in a way it is, it is him dancing west side story style in a dark street. But the narrative of the mv is the giveaway. The color scheme, and the little details most people (solos) miss. The Screen is less about whose eyes they are (the eyes are most certainly a man’s eyes) but how it stops and changes Jimin’s direction and rewinds the plot. it is done with a purpose, and is almost crucial to the plot, it is not random. It is not about spoiling a future project, it is about how it changes Jimin’s direction, the tape rewinds and he goes back to the start, and voila, he no longer interacts with the female dancers, he walks past them. She is not “Who” his heart is waiting for…..

Next @akd06

As for anon, I feel kind of bad for you that you are trying so hard to understand Jimin's art, like it is an autobiographical book. No art is that way. It is always subjective.

Did you read my ask or??

Basically I thought MUSE was conceptual, Jimin AND the producers said things about Jimin in regards to romantic love that made me question if he’s been in a relationship (if they pertain directly to Jimin and not just a concept), so I decided to look more in depth at the album, WHO, the MV, and the choreo to see a better picture of what Jimin was potentially trying to say.

And there is no way I would ever use a pronoun to prove or disprove anything, especially in a song, that is their job. I hope for you that you can relax and just enjoy their beautiful voices and kind souls.💜

UMMMM????

I know people (antis) are going on about pronouns, but honestly I already think Jimin is queer or bisexual, so writing a love song about a woman or with female pronouns doesn’t negate that (especially since we’ve seen a version where the lyrics were gender neutral). Until Jimin outright says he has never and will never have romantic feelings towards a man, I’m under the assumption that he may be bisexual (regardless of if he wants a male or female partner).

I KNOW IT’S LONG, BUT DON’T SPEAK UNLESS YOU’VE READ MY ASK FULLY PLS 😃

I’ve seen the many anons that were spamming your and other Jikookers’ inboxes the second WHO and MUSE released because “OMG Jimin said she/her!! He’s single and looking for a woman to love!” became the newest narrative.

While I do think it would be perfectly okay for him to want a female partner, it does make me slightly upset and sad, that people resorted to being homophobic and honestly misogynistic as a response. There is a way to discuss Jimin's potential romantic partners without being nasty to queer fans or possibly invalidating Jimin’s identity (especially since it is not likely that he’d ever fully come out (if he is queer/bi) in the way most people think nor want, given where he lives and his line of work).

Even the way people were talking about women was questionable. Going on about how it is outrageous for Jimin to deny himself the chance to be with a woman, have a biological family, and overall is wasting himself on Jungkook (if they are in a romantic relationship).

Making women out to be objects for men to use and only worth making/raising families, the homophobic rhetoric towards the longevity of queer relationships and same sex parents, as well as the blatant disrespect to Jungkook (that he’s “not enough” or “not right” for Jimin). If someone thinks that Jikook are nothing but platonic friends, that is perfectly fine. But to degrade their bond, as well as Jimin and Jungkook’s characters, is just unnecessarily cruel.

The producers say the album is about looking for some imaginary woman, while every song other than WHO is gender neutral. Even with WHO, we are shown a version that was gender neutral.

Most (if not all) of what I hear him talk about in relation to MUSE is gender neutral. I don’t have an issue with Jimin making love songs about women, but make it consistent with the rest of the album that THEY (Jimin and Producers) wrote then!

So is he not LOOKING FOR A WOMAN? Or is he not SINGLE?

Is the album not about his LOVE LIFE but his work?

Because ANY of those would actually make more sense to misunderstand.

Auto Calibration being the main one as it flashes on screen after Jimin dances with men and then leads into him dancing with women. This does give some queer vibes, and makes me interested in what “story” Jimin had in mind with WHO as the choreo also has similar vibes too.

Jimin mentioning people instead of just women as potential options when passing by is also interesting, especially when he has mostly talked about this album gender neutrally.

During a Chorus part Jimin joins up with SIX OTHER MEN. I don’t know if this is supposed to be a BTS reference or just formations. But what is the point of having SIX when there is only FIVE later for the girls vs boys part? Why not just keep the seven men (including Jimin) and have seven girls? Where’d the other guy even go?

Next in Verse Two when Jimin sings about “taking her places they ain’t found yet, putting it all on the line, and being that someone she can count on”, he dances with two men. Why? Would it not be better for him to do some sort of partner choreo here?

In the bridge, he repeats “who is my heart, heart waiting for?” as he passes by BOTH WOMEN AND MEN. Sure he only tries to match with women, but he’s a kpop idol and the song uses female pronouns, so that’s expected. I’m sure the male dancers were most likely included just to have it look better, but considering Jimin saying people when talking about it, the gender neutral version of the song, and that Jimin was involved with the choreo, it’s something to consider!

If he is being up front about his romantic past, then I really do hope he finds his person, whoever they might be.

Now I’m a little confused on where I stand, and knowing what MUSE and WHO are about in relation to Jimin would help. I know you obviously can’t know exactly. But I’m hoping I’ll get something other than “Jikook is real! Stop doubting them! You’re projecting your internalized homophobia!” OR “Jikook isn’t real! Jimin is straight and looking for a woman!”

@queenofsweden

Can I weigh in on the tiny part about the tarot and the devil perspective!?

Firstly, it is not that Jimin thinks his relationship is the devil, or he views it negatively in terms of his feelings, it’s that he knows it has the potential to harm them, if anything were to be exposed. And he’s right, unfortunately, it’s very likely to impact them if they were exposed.

To me in a way, this perspective could somewhat explain the need to use a song like Who, or a concept for love songs as if he’s never been in love. It’s why they are all single. Especially if they are queer they would need a way to protect that, and with the release of the show, more so. The show could have exposed them a whole lot more than it did, but I guess it helps (again sadly) that half the fandom are tkkrs, and the others are made up of homophobes and others are ignorant solos.

I personally don’t feel like it’s ok to project outcomes from tarot readings that were done without the person being read for present nor without their permission or knowledge.

I don't think this much of a reply and more of me just copy and pasting my other ask 💀

If anyone actually cares, my final thoughts with MUSE as of February 8, 2025 are that it may be about how he felt excited to work on music (FACE) detailed through the first "crush/love" tracks and then after he had difficulty post FACE promotions, WHO comes in with him still struggles with finding inspiration and love for his art.

Still confused about the not relating to romantic love part...

Thank you so much for the response Storm 💜

— (Not So) Nice MUSE Anon 🎨

In response to this post:

Sorry it took me so long to get back to you, you even dated this so we really know how long I made you wait 😅 I just finally went and checked my inbox again.

This is turning less into a civil discussion and more into infighting from various sources which I am not loving getting into. So I'll post this, so you don't feel like I'm cutting you off. But I'll probably say for this particular avenue of discussion, I'm going to not post anymore.

🎨 Anon, im more than happy to continue discussing this topic with you in DMs. I'm also more than happy to post asks from you and discuss things with you over different things. I'm sorry that some of my replies back in the last post felt a little short. I only replied to the parts that I felt I had anything to say about. I didn't just want to go "ahh I see" to everything. Lol I promise I did read it and while there might've been parts that I still disagreed with partly, I felt like I didn't need to just keep repeating myself as I said most of it in our first post response and I didn't have anything new to add, Idk how else to say my thoughts other than how I already have in either our first post or the last one linked above. But I'm sorry if it came across like I misunderstood your words or didn't fully read your message. I promise I did!

As for everyone else responding, I can understand the frustration in being like "did you even read what I said" so I get that. I'm not wanting to get into any arguments with anyone or any further frustrations. I just don't have the mental bandwidth to deal with that right now. So if you want to have further correspondence with the other blogs, I'd recommend contacting them directly to continue to talk, either through DMs or if they have anons on as well there.

I still think you are nice. And I hope EVERYONE involved in this post, has a really wonderful rest of their day and hopefully we can all continue to have respectful agree to disagree conversations about things more in the future 💜💜

[ms-scarletwings]

The Speculative Analysis About Irkens No One Asked For: Part II

Hiya! Back at it again with not shutting up about the lil green dudes. In case you found this first, here’s the Part One of this spiel, touching on some of the environmental theories about Irk and its cyberpunk-leaning cultural direction. While this post is dedicated to a more biological look of what’s going on with the Irkens, there was some leading context and other tidbits back in that one you may also enjoy, too.

So, carrying through what we previously set up, I want to… admit off the bat that, I found it a little difficult at first, you know?-To pick an angle I wanted to sink my teeth into. With how old the show’s become and how creative & enthusiastic a fanbase it attracted, it’s getting hard to really note (or theorize) something about Irken anatomy that hasn’t been said before somewhere. And don’t get me wrong, that’s awesome and I love almost every word of it I’ve read. A lot of it from various sources is almost certainly going to bleed together into the first half of this. So, keep it in mind, yet I will try to chew a little deeper into the questions we can’t actually answer with just a rewatch of the show, all good? Because there’s a few more base things we know from the canon I’m going to include to start listing: - Irkens lack any visible form of nose or ears, but are equipped with a pair of sensory antennae. Presumably, these organs fulfill the same roles, as they do in real-world insects. - Irken organs are obviously very alien, not well explained, artificially enhanced, and hard to compare to that of a human’s- outside of their general body shape, the presence of a primary brain separate from the PAK, and the fact that they do possess something of an internal skeleton. - A petite race on average (relative to humans), Irkens universally follow an unquestioned social hierarchy based on individual height. - Irkens are endowed with a remarkable ability to regenerate and heal superficial injuries, even up to repairing the damage of being nearly skinned alive (chest-down) or severely burning their corneas within a matter of hours. - Their preferred diet is one that is rich in (if not primarily made of) refined carbohydrates, and while they seem to tolerate fatty sources, such as processed dairy, their anatomy is poorly suited for dealing with high-protein foods like beans and meat. - In fact, all forms of contact with exposed animal meat itself will cause it to dissolve and meld into their own flesh, via an incredibly painful process. - On contact with water from Earth, their skin will receive harsh chemical burns (This has been explained by Vasquez to be a consequence of impurities and man-made pollutants, which Irkens seem sensitive to). - While I’m already on a roll about their skin, it also contains/produces a substance capable of killing lice.

Now, I think we’ve all heard a lot about sqeedily spooches, but does anyone else want to keep marinating a second longer on the topic of s k i n ? Because I have some damn thoughts to release about Zim’s outer casing.

Let’s Get Chemical

First hot take, and the hill I am willing to be slain on: That ain’t actually skin! At least, it is nothing chemically alike to Earth-native vertebrate skin. I’ve given all of the above and the general running theme about Irkens resembling arthropods a lot of thought, and I’ve come to about the only conclusion I could that makes their dermis equivalent… make sense.

See, one of the biggest traits that sets apart invertebrates from other animals in real life is the “innie or outie” skeleton question, but you gotta understand that the “skeletons” that bugs and crabs have would still be considered something completely different from our endoskeletons even if they were on the inside. The hard tissues that make up OUR skeletal systems are mostly made up of a *collagen (remember that word!) frame that is reinforced by calcium, phosphorus, and other minerals. The hard parts of an ant’s skeleton, on the other foot, are mainly composited of chitin.

Chitin, now, is a very neat substance. It’s a polysaccharide, meaning that it’s made up of a bunch of sugar molecules chained together. This makes it distinct from proteins, which are made of amino acid chains instead of carbs. Chitin is also one of the single most important structural polymers in the universe to a ton of existing life. It makes up the literal backbone of arthropods and the cell walls of all fungi. We’ve even found it in fish scales and some amphibians. So, must also be important to humans, right? NAH. Not a chance. Higher animals actually long ditched the ability to synthesize the stuff, and are not any the worse for it, since there’s more than one way to stick a bunch of creature pieces together. For two examples, keratin and *collagen are proteins we naturally synthesize that functionally do the same thing. Keratin is the hard substance that makes up hair & fingernails, and collagen is practically the wonderglue of flesh: It’s a fundamental binder that holds together your bones, your skin, your precious muscle meats, the ligaments, the tendies, the nerves…

pretty much the whole person blueprint if you get the picture.

And thus concludes your (VERY overly simplified) highshcool bio class recap, but what the hell did that have to do with the cartoon spacemen again? I’m gonna round back to them through a funny secret about exoskeletons, actually: They have a softer part, too! Chitin’s hella diverse in its forms and utility. What’s in an exoskeleton is actually a version of it modified with other materials (like what’s done to collagen in bone) to make it so rigid and shell-like. A purer chitin, on the other hand, is more leathery and flexible, less like the shell of a beetle and more like the squishy wall around a caterpillar or maggot. Even the hard bodied insects still have an endocuticle layer like this hiding just under the “shell”, still considered part of the whole exoskeleton, but suddenly looking and acting more like we’d call a skin.

Eh, see where I’m going with this? My conviction is this- Irkens may have used to be even more arthropodal in an earlier stage of their evolution, including BOTH an internal skeleton, and some form of protective exoskeleton in their body plan. And hey, maybe the two were extensions of the same system once, too. You recognize something like that in modern tortoises when you remember that their “shells” are actually just the bone structure of their own ribcage. Then, let’s say that Irkens later saw the loss of their heavier exocuticle, leaving behind the endoskeleton and the flexible inner (now just an outer) cuticle of what used to be an entire body shell. This could have been a gradual change, via natural selection, or it could have been another artificial mutation brought on by technology- wherein the elder brains decided the feature was less efficient and simply phased it out of the cloning process- the same as the loss of their species’ sexual organs.

But, you’re thinking, why on Irk would the loss of an entire badass armor layer be beneficial to their fitness? Few reasons- For one, they are cumbersome and limiting. The downgrade on freedom of movement and flexibility they would be for a bipedal humanoid is self-explanatory enough. When it came to structural integrity, the inner skeleton would have already done a well job with little modification. For all the protection they provide, they don’t leave much room for expansion, and need to be shed in order for the animal to grow any further or to recover from certain injuries. The process of molting itself would be an excruciating process for any intelligent species to have to endure; one that also temporarily leaves the critter in a very vulnerable and stressed state for every molt. To advance from more primitive origins into a dominant race, manual dexterity and mobility would have to take a front seat over a small amount of modest defenses, and mind you, Irk long ago woulda managed to compensate for that loss in the form of advanced weaponry (obviously).

I’m also of the mind that the shift away from an exoskeleton could have even been the key to allowing the Irkens to even grow to the size they are now. Recall back to Part One for a second, where I shared the likely case for Irk having a massive bulk behind its gravity field. Gravity is a hard thing on any skeletal structure, representing a constant strain to be fought against when moving, growing, and bearing weight .There’s a lot of factors behind why we don’t have horse sized spiders or elephant sized lobsters IRL, and weight is actually one of them. Notice how terrestrial isopods only get about to the size of a bean, but the aquatic ones can top out at over a foot long? And that’s only having Earth’s level of gravity to struggle against, let alone however harsh the conditions would be on a larger planet. So, there’s my framework for explaining what I think the aliens’ cuticle is not; however, what does that mean for what it is, besides “feels and looks like a grub’s”?

Well, look again at some of the extraordinary things it can do.

Cooties Immunity

“Germs” was a memorable episode that posed a very legitimate question to the viewer. Why IS IT that foreign pathogens aren’t a bigger concern for the invaders? They’re literally sent off to other worlds to blend in: Socializing with the native inhabitants, eating their foods, and living in an alien habitat. In the case of an undiscovered rock like Earth, our infectious diseases would have no reference available to the Armada whatsoever. Sure, species incompatibility would provide some protection, but the risk of something carrying over and adapting is always still there. Zoonoptic jumps happen all the time with bacteria and viruses, and Zim’s body temperature IS in the normal human range. And what about fungal pathogens, or parasites-

Oh, wait, the lice episode gave it away right there.

I love this sequence so much, because it’s coincidentally like, an exact “art imitates life” parallel to something a real species of primate does. Black lemurs live in the same area of Madagascar as these vibrant, red millipedes.

The millipedes are special because when threatened, they secrete a poisonous substance from their skin. The lemurs are special because they like to grab the bugs and nibble them for no other reason than to make them release those toxins. Those chemicals are then rubbed into their fur, because somehow the lemurs figured out it makes a really handy mosquito repellant. The lemurs also like to get completely zonked out on the chemicals too but eyy- Point was it stands to reason that Irkens may also secrete small amounts of their own potent toxin from the cuticle, perhaps for more hygienic than defensive purposes. This secretion would be responsible for protecting them from parasites and topical infections. Could it also make people blazed out of their minds? …Maybe? I think I’d like to promote the “Just Say No” policy on the matter of licking aliens, though. Ffs at least ask them out to dinner first.

When it comes to other kinds of sick, looks like it might be the trusty old PAK to the rescue here again. I imagine that, being an intergalactic, partially mechanical civilization, the Irken race has come down this road enough to put in a workaround. A standard PAK contains the entirety of the population’s collective knowledge/history- which would include a catalog of all known infectious agents they have encountered across the universe. Some kind of nanobot-bolstered immune system that could detect and respond appropriately to new threats isn’t out of the question, nor should a feature that can automatically administer the appropriate medicine directly into the wearer’s bloodstream. For all this awesomeness, nonetheless, there remains a downside or two that they haven’t quite conquered..

The Meaty, Sweety, Mending of DOOM

Anyone ever actually think about how as far as resilience is concerned, Zim is practically an X-man compared to any Earthling? He has regenerative capabilities that surpass anything else on earth, save idk, bamboo shoots, if even. Injuries that would leave a human permanently disabled only seem to incapacitate an Irken for a few hours to a day at most. They’re all the more tough to put out of commission when considering that a PAK doubles as a form of backup life support, ready to “soft reboot” the host with a quick jolt if it detects a sudden drop in vital signs. It is tempting to credit the same device as the source of this healing boost as well, teasing the nanobot suggestion again; however, I see a chance instead to bring this back a step.

Although not as quick-acting as Zim, or Skoodge’s healing, there are some remarkable examples of regeneration in real arthropods, from repairing tissues/organs to replacing entire lost limbs. What the aliens are packing doesn’t seem all that different, only refined (through years of bioengineering) to work at a truly frightening efficiency. It shows through in their diet as well. Almost always, if we see a member of this species eating on screen, and believe me there was no shortage of examples, what are we watching them shovel their face with?

Space doughnuts, space popcorn, space Fun-Dip, sodas, and curly fries. Sure, there’s plenty of calories here, no doubt with the amount of carbs and grease that could even turn the stomach of a college freshman, but is this… nutrition?

Yes. Just not for us.

Like their civilization, we have also turned the mass production of sweet-packed, fat loaded foods into one of our favored art forms, and there are scattered pockets of our planet that can enjoy these items in cheap abundance. The catch 22? Obesity and heart disease. Meanwhile, Irkens are so metabolically blessed that they can follow the same lifestyle and actually be thriving by it. We know that the majority of human food is utterly toxic to Zim, but then there were waffles, a literal stack of dessert and butter that pretends to be a breakfast…. Our guy was experiencing the “finally some good fucking food” meme from the first bite off that plate, but this can’t seriously be healthy,or if it is, then how?

Well, if I did sell you on the idea that much of their tissues and skeleton swaps out a chitin base where we would be using protein, there you go. Sugars for the building blocks to synthesize the connective/structural tissues for maintaining the body, and the bulk of the energy required to keep it running. And I won’t make the leap and suggest that’s all they have.

After all, the Irken equivalent of sandwiches do actually seem to contain “lettuce” and something that people will say looks like meat slices while not convincing me. I can get behind the thought of the natural or maybe original Irken diet to be a mix of plant matter and supplemental fungi, but everything I’ve put together implies that they are completely unfit for processing the goodies in animal flesh.

Overwhelmingly, I believe that the only time they possibly even seek out more sources of amino acids is going to be when they are smeets. That’s how it works in many wasp species. I.e. The growing larvae are the only ones that actually get to reap from the hard work of a colony hunting down enough protein to feed them with, yet the adults live out the rest of their lives more than content to gorge themselves on nectars and fruits exclusively!

And you even could put that aside, but you’ll have to grapple with the ungodly thing that happens every single time you see Zim touching a piece of meat. Would be awfully convenient to blame it on his personal brand of weirdness, or earth contaminants, but we remember this was a weakness that Tak approached fully aware of and expecting.

We know that polluted water can burn them. We know that beans and other foods can give them grotesque allergic reactions. Well what in the horrifying name of Resident Evil is this, though? Buddy pals, I think we got some unintended consequences of that bio-hacking on hand. Collagen and chitin aren’t just functionally similar to each other, they are practically analogous building blocks.

For a WILD science fact, consider that there’s a ton of ongoing research into the application of chitin and chitin-derivatives into having a role in tissue engineering, as a hypothetical scaffold in lab cultured meat, and as an effective wound dressing ingredient.

What we’re seeing with incidents like Dib throwing that Bologna at Zim could be an extreme form of the vise versa, because I know a certain protein that processed meat happens to be pretty high in :)))

Imagine the coupling of this with the bioengineered genome of Zim’s kind being so… reactive to a foreign intrusion, yet also flexible to modification. Maybe it is the acids, or some contaminant/seasoning on the meat that first damages the cuticle. That healing ability kicks in, but doesn’t stop where chitin does, readily binding to and with the collagens in these strange tissues that are sorta like an Irken’s but also just enough not like an Irken’s that it also kicks the immune system into overdrive. Think of all the pain and inflammation of a poison ivy rash but if the damn plant itself could also fuse itself with whatever you brushed against it. I think Zim actually had an understandable reason to be homicidally pissed off for that Bologna assault. Also how the Bologna virus was accelerated in Zim’s body. Once it had incorporated itself into his own DNA, it was game set and match with the speed and help those cells had to replicate themselves.

And uh, yeah, I think this post has gotten about as long as it reasonably should be here. I did have a couple more points I really wanted to get out of my brain about the Almighty Tallest, and I think that would be a good launching point actually for a possible (and hopefully final jfc) part three to this. Till then I got some off-topic scoliids to taxidermy 👀