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aliceramblez · 1 year ago

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Dating the Hazbin Hotel Residents 😈

Tags: GN!Reader, Fluff, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Mentioned Mature Topics (ie. Suicidal Thoughts, Alcohol Abuse, SA, etc), Spoilers For The Show, etc.

A/N: Ahhh yes, more brainriot for the pile 😌 I was more of a Helluva gal before the show aired, but now I gotta say these blorbos are a dear part of my heart! Hopefully y'all enjoy these as much as I did writing them!

Consider following my main blog @taruchinator for more solid content & feel free to leave a request here for future HCs~

Charlie 🌈

When the Happy Hotel first opened its doors and all of Hell started making a mockery of it, you were probably the only one who took it as a sign to try and improve from the low life that you were. It's not like you had anything else to live for, anyway.

As soon as you enter the building, you're immediately greeted by the bubbly Princess of Hell herself (along with a reluctant Angel Dust) who is more than happy to show you around and welcomes you with open arms.

You've never been shown this much kindness and sympathy for your situation before, so it naturally takes you aback and makes you wonder what the catch is. Turns out there's none and the Princess is probably the only sweet soul to live in this shithole.

As you grow closer, she asks you to drop the title and just call her Charlie. She also shares a bit about her situation and how her mother wanted to save sinners from the extermination each year, and now Charlie felt like it was her duty to continue this legacy until her dreams came true.

You can't help but feel touched over how much she cares, so you silently vow to yourself to help her in any way you can, just like she's done for you.

It doesn't take long before the two of you grow even closer and feelings begin to blossom, but you decide to ignore them since why would a Princess ever like someone like you?

But Charlie proves you wrong yet again, since one day she comes to you a blushing mess and confesses her own feelings, asking if you'd like to go out with her. You can't help but vocalize your shock since she could do so much better than a random sinner. She deserved better, too.

She looks at you with fondness in her eyes. “You've been by my side for so long and supported me every step of the way. Who wouldn't fall for someone like that?”

And thus, you are the luckiest person in Hell because you scored Charlotte Morningstar, and whoever says otherwise can get a knife to their throat.

She's the perfect definition of a sweet and patient girlfriend, never pushing you to do anything you aren't comfortable with (since you really aren't used to such adoration in a romantic relationship), but as soon as you give her the get-go, she'll be sure to shower you with as much affection as she can until the doubts in your mind disappear completely.

You aren't that far behind either. Albeit not as good as her, you do your best to be a comforting partner whenever she needs you. This is especially necessary after an extermination happens, which always leaves Charlie devastated and in need of a hug or words of encouragement because she doubts herself sometimes and wonders if the hotel is even working at all.

You remind her how it brought the two of you together, to which she smiles and agrees that at least something good has come out of it so far.

Vaggie 🎀

Both you and Vaggie used to work in the same legion under Adam with the rest of his exorcists. You knew of each other's existence, but didn't really talk much aside from whatever was needed in the midst of battle.

The day she spares a demon child's life, you're doing your rounds nearby and witness the whole exchange, including Lute coming over and ripping both an eye and Vaggie's wings for showing mercy. You don't know why, but it makes your blood boil.

“HEY! What are you doing?! It was just a kid, why not let it slide?”

And just like that, you become a target of Lute's rage as well, being ripped from your angelic status along with receiving a few nasty cuts, yet surprisingly not as bad as Vaggie herself.

Once the two of you are left to die, you immediately try to tend the girl's wounds with whatever you can. Vaggie can only stare in disbelief at what you'd done and questions why you even did so in the first place—now you were stuck just like she was.

“Guess I just don't like seeing injustice... Who knew Heaven could be so fuckin' shitty?”

You both laugh at the irony of it all, and that's when luck is finally on your side as Charlie finds you in the dirty alley and brings you back to the hotel to heal properly.

For the next three years you two stay at the Hazbin Hotel, helping Charlie in any way you can to try and make her dream a reality since deep down you hope that despite Heaven's corrupt system, there can be a small chance that souls can be redeemed. You hide the fact that you're ex-Anges though, since you don't wanna cause unnecessary drama.

During this time period, the two of you become better friends, having your own inside jokes regarding things you didn't particularly enjoy from your time as Angels, as well as learning more about one another.

You're the one to come to terms with your feelings first and decide to lay them on the table for Vaggie to see—she's always been a straight-to-the-point kind of gal, so if you're about to be rejected, might as well have it be done quick. But of course, she replies with her own declaration and desire to give a relationship a shot, which you're ecstatic about!

It's a bit hard at first since you never got to see much of romantic relationships in Heaven while training for murder every year, but you try and make it work. Both you and Vaggie work endlessly to try and make the other happy, and it only makes you fall for each other even more.

Also Charlie is your go-to wingwoman who will be there to give you the best advice to try and woo your girlfriend. She ships you two so hard.

Angel Dust 🕸

Working at a porn studio under an Overlord who owns your soul can be exhausting. You know this better than anyone since everyone who works under Valentino has contracts that won't let you get far with a leash. This is especially true with your friend Angel Dust.

You know about the things Valentino does to the spider demon—hell, everyone in the studio probably knows, but know better than to say anything about it. You're always there for Angel after particularly rough shoots, doing your best to comfort him in any way you can, though there isn't much you can do given you're in the same spot.

When he tells you he's moving to Princess Charlie's Hazbin Hotel, you're so happy for him! At least that will give him some distance from Valentino and his disgustingly filthy hands when he's not working.

This unsurprisingly doesn't bode well with the Overlord, causing him to throw fits of rage around the studio when Angel leaves for the day. You can't help but make a snarky comment that you definitely regret moments later.

“Can one blame him for wanting space from such an overbearing asshole?”

Without his favorite stress toy around, you end up paying the price for such comments. The kind of pain and suffering he puts you through is completely different from what you're used to. Is this the stuff he does to Angel? He leaves you naked, bruised and bloody in your room, and all you can do is muster what little strenght you have left to head for the Hazbin Hotel.

As soon as the door opens, you immediately tumble forward and start losing consciousness. The last thing you remember is Angel's horrified expression before it all fades to black.

Once you wake up and have been patched up, you explain what happened at the studio, and you could've sworn you saw fire in Angel's eyes as he holds on to you, fearing you might disappear at any moment. He begs you to stay in the hotel with him, and you agree without hesitation.

And so, your new routine of heading to work and then coming back to the hotel becomes blissful, not having to deal with that lunatic mothman more than necessary. You also get to spend time off with your best friend, which is always a plus.

Well, ‘best friend’ might not be the best way to describe it. You'd developed a crush on the spider demon even before this whole incident occurred, and now that you were spending more time with him, it only continued to grow.

With the line of work you two had, romantic relationships didn't seem to be a thing that crossed anybody's mind since why have a permanent partner when you could just go around fucking the hottest people in Hell? But you knew your feelings were far beyond from sexual, but didn't wanna ruin what you already had going for you.

One heartfelt drunken conversation after work however, makes you do a double take—Angel likes you back. And that both scares and excites you. But with both of you going over the pros and cons with each other, you decide to give it a chance.

You make sure to always have Angel's consent when it comes to physical intimacy—anything from holding his hand, to kissing to just cuddling. He jokes about not being a porcelain doll, but deep down you know he appreciates it.

You're also there for the rough nights, when he comes home wanting nothing more than to die again and let the earth swallow him whole. Words of reassurance are spoken and you can only hold him and let him cry as you vow to do anything in your power to stop this from happening again.

Husker 🍺

As one of the first guests of the hotel, like any wayward sinner, you find yourself in the bar more often than you'd like. Alcohol killed you in the first place, yet not even in the afterlife could you seem to pull yourself from its grasp.

It's a somewhat welcome surprise to find out that the bartender is going through a similar struggle. He still serves you drinks and lends and ear whenever he's not busy, but will occasionally drop the words of wisdom to watch your fill.

Eventually you two find yourselves doing this little back and forth and aid each other when you're in your dark places—Husk won't let you near the bottle if he sees you're about to knock yourself out, meanwhile you're there to look after him when he has one too many drinks and can't take care of himself.

Not to say he isn't a good drinking buddy—you've found out most of the gossip around the hotel thanks to this sneaky little cat demon and there's never a dull moment with him around.

You learn about his deal with Alastor during a particularly bad night, when Husk's had one too many and isn't thinking straight. You don't bring it up, but now have an eye open for whenever the Radio Demon drags your friend away.

Angel's the one who brings up your questionable relationship to the surface.

“So... you two like, fuckin' each other, or what?”

Your entire face goes red, and if it weren't for the dark fur you could swear you see Husk looking the same. He's quick to get rid of Angel's nosy ass, but now the seed has been planted in your brain—do you like Husk that way?

After careful consideration, you come to the conclusion that yes, you do. And it's honestly kinda terrifying considering how relationships don't usually work out in Hell, at least from what you've seen. Besides, even if you did try and confess, there was always the possibility of him not feeling the same and just being embarrassed by Angel's comment.

So in an attempt to make your feelings disappear, you stop frequenting the bar. Who knew the best way to stop drinking habits was trying to avoid spending time with your unrequited crush?

But of course, Husk isn't stupid. He sees the change in your behavior and let's it slide for a while, until he eventually corners you and asks what's wrong. You decide to get it all out of the way and tell him how you feel.

To the embarrassment of both of you, he holds your hand firmly between his and darts his eyes toward the corner of the room. “Next time you should ask before going off assuming things, ya got it?”

And so, your glass may have been empty that day, but your heart had never felt fuller.

Sir Pentious 🐍

You meet Sir Pentious when you sign into the hotel, and your immediate thought is just how can this snake man be so adorkable, it should be illegal.

As you greet the other residents and staff, you're quick to strike a conversation with him, which based on his body language he was not expecting. He starts telling you a bit about his weaponry and other contraptions, and you can't help but be fascinated by it.

You're a bit of a tinkerer yourself, albeit you've only dabbled in small scale projects—nothing compared to the massive canons and aircrafts that Pentious seems to be familiar with.

He acts like a kid opening gifts on Sinmas when he talks to you about his inventions, clearly never having anyone show interest before. Eventually he'll even ask for your input on certain smaller projects he wants to work on to help around the hotel, all to thank Charlie for being so kind to him and giving him a second chance. You're obviously eager to help!

You two start spending so much time together that the egg boys have started calling you ‘Boss #2’, much to Pentious' embarrassment and your amusement.

One afternoon once exercises are done for the day, the snake demon seems much more fidgety than usual as he invites you over to his room to continue working on his security system prototype. He's a blabbering mess once he has you sitting down and your heart just can't help but swell at each little syllable.

“Dearest (y/n)... you've, um, well... you are a huge inspiration for my work! A-And I wouldn't have been able to create any of this... without your help. You are kind, and smart and very talented.... and w-well, um I-”

You gotta silence the man with a kiss otherwise you two would be here all day. He's puddy in your hands and you can only giggle in return. “I really like you too, Pen.”

Everyone is either saying they called it or groaning in annoyance because fucking FINALLY, you two were just dancing around each other like idiots. The egg boys are just so happy to have someone else besides Pentious to be in their lives, and will do their best to look out for you just like with their own boss.

So yeah, prepare yourself for some sickeningly sweet gestures from this guy cause he will go above and beyond to get you what you need/want even if it kills him (again). And you can confidently say that you'd do the same in return.

Alastor 📻

After running in the same circles when you were alive, it's no surprise to you to end up in Hell, although you never would've suspected that you'd find yourself in the same place as him. It was honestly a huge relief not having to go through this all by yourself.

As Alastor exerted his dominance over Hell as the Radio Demon, you were powerful enough to be an Overlord yes, but rather liked keeping it on the down low instead of making a spectacle of yourself (Alastor was the one for theatrics anyway). Because of this, only select few knew of your true power and what you were capable of.

Instead, if there was one thing you were known for, it was being the only soul allowed to be close to the Radio Demon without the risk of death.

Yes, Alastor was a sadistic, cold-blooded and egotistical mastermind, but he wasn't a monster. You knew that better than anyone. Although the reactions he had to other demons treating you like a joke or calling you the ‘Radio Demon's Pet’ were not helping his case.

“ł₣ ɎØɄ V₳ⱠɄɆ ɎØɄⱤ ₴ØɄⱠ, ɎØɄ ₩łⱠⱠ ₩₳Ⱡ₭ ₳₩₳Ɏ Ɽł₲Ⱨ₮ ₦Ø₩ ฿Ɇ₣ØⱤɆ ł Ɽł₱ ł₮ ₳₱₳Ɽ₮ ฿ł₮ ฿Ɏ ฿ł₮...”

“Al, chill. You're gonna make them shit their pants.”

After his seven year absence, you immediately noticed something was wrong with him, and wouldn't stop pestering until he told you the truth—A deal he made and how his soul was now bound to someone much more powerful than he was.

You were obviously mortified and started looking into ways to try and find a loophole to this, but alas the Radio Demon would just give you his signature grin and tell you not to worry about it. It was his battle to face.

But of course you're quick to remind him that you've stuck together through thick and thin even in life, so there was no way you were letting him handle this by himself. You work as a team—always have and always will. You engulf him in a hug.

“We're gonna figure this out, Al. I promise...”

The grin remains, but his eyes widen slightly in surprise. He hesitantly returns the embrace, patting your back and wiping the tears you didn't even know you were shedding.

“There there~ To think such a sweet and innocent soul wound up in a gutter like this. I cannot say I complain as long as I have your delightful company beside me.”

And so when he says he has a plan that involves Princess Charlie Morningstar and her new Happy Hotel, you follow along. Whatever fate has in store for you two, you'll be ready.

Also Charlie is a sweetheart who could do no harm. Knowing Alastor, he'll probably do whatever he can here and there to help around for the cause. You also offer your services as an undercover Overlord, much to everyone's surprise when you reveal your status.

The Radio Demon may have a plan, but something tells you it won't involve bloody murder (unless extremely necessary or if someone really pissed him off).

Like you said—he's not a monster.

Lucifer 🍎

You and Lucifer were good friends at the beginning of Creation. While you were stuck with the tedious task of designing blueprints for the new ‘Human Project’ that headquarters had in store, Lucifer's Seraphim status allowed him to bring creations to life with the flick of a wrist, much to your delight and wonder.

His ideas and pitches for Earth were always so entertaining to listen to, and you would do your best to encourage him to show them to the higher ups to get them approved—His mind was just filled with joy and love and wonder that you'd never seen before.

Which was why it was always so disappointing whenever he'd come back and say that he was shut down and even mocked at. How could Heaven shut down such an imaginative mind in the creation of their biggest project yet?

To say you were devastated when you heard about his fall would be an understatement. You mourned the loss of your friend, knowing that he'd done nothing wrong and thinking it wasn't fair to him to receive such punishment just because he cared for the future of humanity.

Thousands of years later, you overhear the plan for Extermination of Hell kind. You didn't mean to walk by, yet here you were, under the direct eye of the Head Seraphims about to be downcast for something you had no control over—just like Lucifer.

“You're all self-entitled pricks! You think you can do whatever you want just because it doesn't follow what you define as good!”

You get a few good arguments before being cast downwards, leaving you in bad shape in a random alley with no wings and no means of escape. That is of course, until destiny seems to be on your side and Lucifer finds you, completely perplexed to see you here at all.

After getting treated, you tell him about the Extermination so he and Hell can prepare. The conversation of you getting cast down by Heaven gets glossed over, but he can feel the fury building up inside him. You were always doing things by the book—how could they do this to you?

Once the slaughter is over, Lucifer gets a meeting with Heaven and secures protection for both his daughter Charlie and you, to which they begrudgingly agree to keep him outta their hair. You can't help but feel touched by this gesture.

He's also quick to offer you a room to stay in, but you compromise by living in a seperate building from him and Charlie so you aren't a bother even though he says you aren't. In fact, ever since Lilith left, he's had to take care of his young daughter all by himself, so he's more than happy when you offer to help.

It doesn't take long for your feelings to start coming into the surface from all those years ago, and you gotta push them away because he's both married and has a child to look after! Besides, why would the King of Hell ever look in your direction?

Eventually though, he brings up the question with nothing but sweaty palms and a customized rubber ducky that says ‘I love you’ whenever you squeeze it. You blush furiously, but can't help but bring up your concerns, not wanting to replace Lilith in his heart. He looks into your eyes and says that he hasn't been as happy as he is now in the past thousand years.

Cue baby Charlie walking in on everything, and she just smiles and goes innocently. “Daddy! Is (y/n) staying home with us now?”

You two can only chuckle at the cuteness of it and you immediately go to hug her. You couldn't believe that you were blessed with such a wonderful family.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel spoilers #hazbin hotel x reader #charlie morningstar x reader #vaggie x reader #angel dust x reader #alastor x reader #sir pentious x reader #lucifer morningstar x reader #husker x reader #husk x reader

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slaytheusurper · 4 months ago

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⭑ Salty Kisses ⭑

Masterlist

A/N: We are all in desperate need of Quinn fics!!

Pairing: Quinn Mossbacher x Reader

Warnings: NSFW, +18 mdni, smoking weed, Olivia being a bitch, nudes, mastrubation (m), making out, heavy petting, p in v sex, handjob, sort of public sex, creampie.

Summary: Joining your best friend Olivia on vacation meant facing your crush on her brother once again, but this year, you would make a move.

Word count: 7.6K (My longest one shot yet)

“Oh my god, who are these people?” Olivia sighed next to you. Looking at her from the corner of your eye, you smiled. She had a flair for the dramatics and could be a bit self important but you have known her since elementary school. After quickly becoming best friends, you often were allowed to accompany her and her family on their luxurious vacations.

This year was no exception as you had joined them on their vacation to Hawaii. Even though you felt like you and Olivia had slightly drifted apart, you joined them anyway. She was two years older than you but she had always said how that didn’t matter to her, and how mature you were for your age.

After a draining flight and almost losing your luggage at the pickup, you were glad to be relaxing on the boat. Both you and Olivia had separated yourselves from the other passengers, her parents and brother included.

As you peered down at them from the heightened open cabin up top, you secretly checked out her brother. Quinn was a special type, and you’ve always had a thing for pathetic and nerdy boys. So how could you help yourself when your best friend had a brother exactly like that?

“So those two,” Olivia suddenly spoke up again, nodding towards the newlyweds at the back of the boat, “they just got married in the Hamptons. Her parents have a place there.”

You observed the obnoxious couple taking cringey selfies. “I bet they met on Raya.” You added with a grin.

“Totally.” Olivia smiles, both of you watching as the woman hangs off of her new husband. “She’s in fashion.” Olivia then announces. “Marketing.” You correct her. “He went to Dartmouth, international finance.” You add. Watching as Olivia’s dad takes a picture for the couple.

“She loves him but-” Olivia starts.

“He’s got a small dick.” You laugh. Olivia chuckles before adding, “He’s a closet adderall snorter.”

“Gives him an edge at work.” You agreed. “Makes his dick even smaller.” Olivia says before the both of you burst out laughing. The couple has no idea as they take even more pictures.

You continue to make up stories about the people that joined you on the boat before Nicole, Olivia’s mom, calls for you. “Hey girls.”

“What mom?” Olivia responds annoyed, the mood between you stale again. “Liv come up front, I think you can see the resort.” Nicole points, gesturing for the two of you to follow her. She was right however, The White Lotus slowly came into view.

Olivia sweetly took your hand to help you off the boat. The wooden dock rocked slightly beneath your feet before you stepped onto solid ground, the warmth of the island air wrapping around you. It felt good to be steady again.

You exchanged a glance with Olivia, something unreadable flickering in her eyes, maybe amusement, maybe something else. A man with a neatly groomed mustache stood waiting, flanked by resort employees in crisp uniforms, their polite smiles already plastered across their faces.

As you approached them, the moustache man’s smile grew. “Mr. and Mrs. Mossbacher, hello! I’m Armond, the resort manager. Welcome to the White Lotus.” The man, apparently named Armond, greeted you with a thick Australian accent.

“How was your journey here?” He asked as Nicole accepted the flower necklace from a staff member. You drowned out their conversation as you took another glance at Quinn, who was completely lost in his videogame on his Nintendo.

When everyone started walking, you hurriedly joined them on the golf cart who was driven by a typical white surfer dude. During the short ride to the resort, you made small talk with Olivia, such as what you would do when you had unpacked, and before you knew it, it was time to get off.

The resort was very impressive, a beautiful calming design that still felt very luxurious. You expected nothing less from the Mossbachers who always booked VIP suites. The room itself was even better, beautifully decorated with a nice balcony and a pull up couch.

You wondered where Quinn was going to sleep since there were only two designated beds, one for you and Oliva to share and one for her parents in an adjacent room. As you set your stuff down, your question is answered when Olivia orders Quinn to sleep in the tiny kitchen, while her parents are out of earshot of course.

It surprises you how Quinn actually listens and locks himself in the stuffy room. Olivia pulls you with her and the two of you change into your bikini’s. When you were finished, you checked out the large balcony and agreed on going to the beach. Before you could actually leave, Nicole already called for you.

“Girls!”

“Yeah?” Olivia responds as you strut back inside. “I would like to talk to you guys about, you know, just some of this clutter. Because this is going to be our common space, and I would love to try to, you know, just clear it out.” Nicole rambles as she walks around moving luggage.

“Mom! We can take care of it later-” Olivia starts, but before she can even argue further her mom insists on taking care of it now. Of course.

Nicole pulls open the tiny adjacent kitchen galley and is met with Quinn hunched over on the tiny bed, playing on his phone. “Quinn, why is your bed in here?” She says as she drops the stuff.

“Olivia said I have to sleep here.” Quinn sulkingly responds. Stupid butterflies already swirl in your stomach upon hearing his voice after the long time he hadn’t spoken.

“Olivia, your brother is not sleeping in the kitchen.” Nicole scolded, turning to the two of you, bags in hand and ready to go. Olivia then walks over to peer inside the room that Quinn was residing in. “Why not?” She shrugs.

“Because it’s a tiny galley kitchen, and we’ve got this whole beautiful room.” Nicole scoffs. Olivia looks inside, Quinn already back on his phone again.

“Mom, he's doing fine in there. Look, he's stimming. He can entertain himself for hours with just his own hand gestures! He’s fine in the kitchen.” She says sauntering back over to you.

Your brows furrowed at her words, feeling kind of shitty for being in such a beautiful place and then making her brother sleep in a windowless, suffocating room. “Olivia, no!” Her mother argued back, but Oliva already took your hand and led you to the door.

“Mom you want him to sleep in here with us, he’s gonna jerk off to my best friend while she’s sleeping!” Olivia turned, as her mom stopped the two of you. “I don’t think-” You tried to interject but Olivia cut you off already.

“Mom! He’s fine, he’s being himself, gaming and fapping- and byeee!” Olivia yelled as she now fully pulled you with her out the door. The rest of the afternoon you and Olivia tried to catch as much sun as possible on the beach, occasionally taking a dip in the water to cool off.

As the sun started to set, you headed back to the suite to get dressed for dinner. You chose a beautiful but still casual flowy dress you bought for the vacation, Olivia dressed in shorts and a halter top. You were excited to see how the lobster bake turned out and had gotten quite hungry as you didn’t bring any snacks to the beach.

The outside dining area took your breath away, beautiful lights hung everywhere and you took it all in as you were being led to your table. To your delight, Quinn took a seat next to you and gave you a small smile as you sat down, which of course, you returned.

You knew Olivia had always been very bitchy towards her brother, it had been normal in their relationship, but you still felt a tiny sting of guilt everytime you didn’t speak up to her about it. You also knew Quinn didn’t have any friends, apart from online, so you always tried to be nice to him.

The food arrived after fifteen minutes, while Olivia started a discussion with you about Hilary Clinton, something you were not entirely in the mood for tonight, but she could get offended if you didn’t indulge. Soon Nicole intervened and Olivia was quick to drop it.

On your side, you could hear Quinn play one of his video games on his nintendo, finally you gave into the urge to ask him about it, to talk to him about anything. “Quinn, what game are you playing?” You asked sweetly, peering over to look at his screen. Olivia raised a brow at you.

Quinn visibly became red. “Oh uhm, just a game about an assassin, it’s really cool, I’ve been playing it for a while-” He couldn’t even finish talking before his sister cut him off. “Yeah, yeah she gets it. So we should probably head out for that walk you mentioned earlier.”

You felt bad for Quinn, but remembered what Olivia meant. “Sure yeah. Maybe you can tell me more later, Quinn?” He nodded at your words, his cheeks still flushed as the light of his screen made it more noticeable.

“Great, let’s go.” Olivia didn’t even ask her parents before she practically jumped out of her seat.

Excusing yourself at least, you followed her. As you joined her side, she led you to one of the younger guys working around the resort. “What did you think about the dude who drove the cart?” She asked with a smile, you already knew where she was heading.

“Not my type, such a typical smooth brained surfer boy, I can’t with them.” You rolled your eyes. She laughed but composed herself as you approached the cute guy. Olivia had always been a bit obsessed with boys, it was all she could seem to think about, that and weed.

You stood idly by her side as Olivia put on her flirtatious face and started to talk up the guy. Still, your eyes lingered on Quinn, who remained in your vision a couple feet away. He looked so adorable tonight, his short sleeve blouse really suited him and his hair was curly and messy, secretly just the way you liked it.

Getting lost in your thoughts, you suddenly felt Olivia poke at you.

“Dude, hellooo? I said let’s go back to the room, I brought some weed we can smoke.” She suggested.

“Sorry, zoned out a bit. But sure, let’s go.” Olivia followed your earlier line of sight, but she wasn’t convinced you might have been checking out her brother, so she ignored it.

The guy had gone back to serving and you followed Olivia back to the Trade Winds suite. You couldn’t get Quinn out of your mind as you undressed into your pj’s and put your hair up. Olivia rummaged around in one of her bags while you took a seat on your cutely made pull out bed.

“Where the fuck is this thing.” Olivia cursed, sifting through multiple bags. After a while she found it and joined you with a grin. With a water bong and a ziplock bag of weed in her hands, the party could begin. But before she could stock the thing with the green substance, the door opened.

Olivia hurriedly shoved it under you guys’ bedsheets and grabbed her phone, pretending to be busy. “Hey girls, already in your pajamas?” Nicole asked as she strolled through the room with her husband, Quinn following behind them.

“Yeah we just wanted to chill and catch some sleep so we have more energy for the rest of the trip.” You answered. She smiled at you and headed for the bathroom with Mark. Quinn shot you a quick smile before disappearing in the galley kitchen.

After a while, they still remained in their rooms and it was around 10 pm already, Olivia presumed it was safe so she pulled the goods out again. “Fucking finally, sorry my family is so annoying.” She scoffed.

“I think you dislike them more than I do.” You chuckled, pulling out the lighter you had brought. “Sure.” She shrugged. Olivia stacked the bong and took the first hit. The lighter crackling through the quiet room. “Shh.” You giggled. Olivia tried not to laugh while taking another hit, before finally passing it to you.

As the smoke flowed through your throat and into your lungs, you felt a wave of relaxation hit you. You passed the bong back and forth, talking about some guys from school. After about fifteen minutes, you both really felt it. Your brain felt all woozy and fuzzy, your skin like a warm blanket wrapped around you.

The whole room felt more serene and pretty. It had been a while since you smoked weed and it didn’t take long before you and Olivia giggled quietly among yourselves. “You know what we should do?” She laughed all of a sudden.

You raised your brows at her. “Truth or dare.” She wiggled her brows at you, causing you to burst out laughing. Shushing you, she leaned in as if she was about to tell you her darkest secret. “You go first.” She whispered. You thought for a moment. “Truth.”

“Boo you’re so boring.” Olivia giggled. “Whatever, just let me ease into it.” You said, leaning back on your hands. “Fine, have you… ever taken and sent a nude?” She asked with a lower tone, taking caution not to alarm anyone. You rolled your eyes at her.

“God you’re really going to hate this answer- no I have not.” You replied. She looked at you shocked. “Really? But you’re so hot. Like why haven’t you?” Shrugging at her words, you decide to turn the tables. “Truth or dare Livs.” Olivia let it go and picked dare.

“Okay, I dare you… to go over to the next room and knock on their door!” You giggled. She gasped but climbed off the bed anyway. Sneakily you followed her as she opened the door as quietly as possible. You stayed in the doorway, watching as she quickly knocked and sprinted past you back into the room.

It caused you to close the door quicker and harder than you meant to but luckily no one woke up. As you ran back to the bed, Olivia layed back on, you waited with bated breaths- nothing happened. You then fell into a fit of laughter.

“Okay you know what, I pick dare too.” You said after a while, the weed pushing you to be more bold. “I know a good one, I dare you, to let me take nudies of you!” She laughed. You cringed at her words. “I’m not sending them to anyone though!” You shrieked.

“Duh! Get up and take those clothes off girl!” Olivia ordered, grabbing your phone and pressing on the camera. You did as she said, the weed completely derationalising you. “Jesus you look hot.” She said, snapping pictures of your naked form.

When she was done, you put on your clothes before she showed them to you. You both crawled back in bed after that, the exhaustion hitting you hard.

Golden sunlight spilled through the grand windows, painting soft patterns across the sheets as you stirred. Just as your mind drifted between dreams and waking, a hand pressed against your shoulder.

“Wake up,” Olivia murmured, her voice groggy with sleep. “We’re getting breakfast soon.”

Sitting up, the door to Nicole and Mark's bedroom opened and they walked in the room, Mark sitting on the edge of you and Olivia’s shared pull out while Nicole checked on Quinn.

Your mind felt clouded, weighed down by the remnants of sleep and the blurred edges of last night. Flashes of laughter, the ocean breeze, and the smell of weed hang at the edges of your memory, but nothing pieced together quite right.

Then, a sharp voice shattered the quiet.

“What the hell? Quinn! What are you doing on the floor?”

Nicole’s exasperation cut through the morning peace, snapping you into focus. You and Olivia turned your heads in unison, eyes landing on Nicole as she stood, arms crossed, staring down at Quinn with a mix of disbelief and irritation.

You could hear Quinn’s voice from the small galley kitchen. “There’s no air in here.”

“Olivia!” Nicole shouted, you were in no mood for a fight between them but Nicole surely was. “What?” Olivia groaned, her head falling back on her pillow.

“Your brother is stroking out in the kitchen!” Nicole stressed. “What? Dad- what the hell are you doing?” You sat up to see Mark massaging his daughter's foot. “You're so beautiful.” Mark muttered. “You're so smart.” He continued. “Don’t you think?” He turned to you.

“Yeah.” You replied, Nicole now moving a bunch of stuff around in the living room, muttering to herself about the mess you guys made last night. Your heart sank as you noticed the water bong was still on Olivia’s makeshift nightstand. Mark noticed it too.

“Is that a water bong?”

You turned to Olivia, your heart racing. “Hey, did you guys bring pot on the plane?” Mark asked, Olivia pulling her foot away from him. “We found it on the beach-” “It’s prescription-” Both of you spat out. Mark to your surprise simply rolled his eyes.

Quinn appeared out of his room with his duvet wrapped around him, “They were partying all night and making weird lesbian noises.” He uttered while walking past, on his way to the bathroom. “We weren’t being lesbians dad.” Olivia sighed. “Uh- okay.” Mark mumbled.

After Quinn finished getting dressed, you and Olivia changed quickly, eager to start the day. The three of you made your way to breakfast, the scent of fresh coffee and tropical fruit filling the air as you grabbed a quick bite. Conversations buzzed around you, clinking silverware, the occasional burst of laughter, the tranquil energy of resort life.

Once you’d eaten, Olivia’s eyes lit up with an idea. “Let’s check out the pool,” she said, already tugging you toward the suite. Back in your room, you grabbed your swimsuits, a towel, and a book before heading out again, the promise of cool water and warm sun pulling you toward the massive, glittering pools.

As you took in the pool area, your eyes swept over the impressive layout, barstools submerged in cool, glistening water, a shallow kiddie pool, an overwhelming number of lounge beds, and a designated diving section on the far side.

It was the kind of luxury that felt almost surreal, but Olivia barely spared it a second glance before settling onto one of the larger canopy lounge beds, unimpressed.

“Today, I just want to read my book and ignore my family,” she sighed, sliding her sunglasses down the bridge of her nose before flipping open her book. The way she said it was so casual, yet so completely Olivia.

You smirked, shaking your head. “Alright, well, I’m going for a swim first. Be back soon.”

With that, you turned toward the steps, toes brushing against the water’s surface. The initial cold made you hesitate, but before you could psych yourself out, movement on the other side of the pool caught your eye.

Quinn.

His bright orange shirt clung to his torso, completely soaked as he trudged through the water, holding his phone and Nintendo high above his head in a desperate attempt to keep them dry. He was heading toward the bar, a little further from where you stood.

You hesitated, then took a breath. This was your chance to talk to him alone, without Olivia hovering nearby. That thought alone propelled you forward. Careful not to dunk your head under, you waded into the water, the coolness wrapping around you as you made your way toward the bar.

As you got closer, you noticed the familiar white stems of his AirPods in his ears. He probably hadn’t even realized you were there. A mischievous thought crossed your mind. Would it be too cruel to startle him, just a little?

Biting back a grin, you crept up behind him and gently placed a hand on his shoulder.

Quinn jolted, nearly dropping his devices before whipping around, wide-eyed. His tense expression melted into relief when he saw you.

You laughed, settling onto one of the barstools beside him. “Sorry, it just seemed like the perfect opportunity.”

Quinn paused his game, looking at you with something between surprise and uncertainty. He fumbled for words, and you suddenly became hyperaware of how rare these one-on-one conversations were. There had only been a handful of times you’d spoken to him without Olivia around, and every single time had been… well, awkward.

“Uhm- was I interrupting?” you asked, shifting slightly.

“No- no, it’s okay! I really don’t mind,” he rushed to say, his words stumbling over each other.

You smiled, sensing him relax. “Good, that’s good. So, tell me more about your game. Yesterday, Olivia kind of rudely interrupted our conversation.”

That got a reaction out of him. Quinn huffed, pulling his AirPods out completely. “Yeah, she’s just so annoying. Every time I even start talking, she tries to embarrass me.”

“I know. Sorry.” The words slipped out automatically, but when Quinn turned to you fully, you realized he wasn’t just brushing it off.

“Don’t apologize for her,” he said, his voice quieter but more serious. “I noticed you do that a lot around other people.” He hesitated before adding, “I don’t get why you’re friends with her. You’re so much nicer than she is.”

His words caught you off guard. You hadn’t expected him to say something like that, especially not to you.

“Thanks,” you said, a little softer this time. “But I’ve known her for a long time. She can be nice and fun… she just has her moments.” Even as you said it, you weren’t sure if you believed it.

Quinn let out a small chuckle. “If you say so.”

Not wanting the conversation to turn too serious, you quickly shifted gears. “So… back to your game,” you prompted.

That was all the encouragement he needed. For the next half-hour, Quinn talked, really talked- rambling and info-dumping about Assassin’s Creed with an enthusiasm that was almost contagious. You listened, asked questions, got completely caught up in his excitement. It was easy, effortless.

And then Olivia ruined it.

You caught sight of her from across the pool, waving from her lounge bed, beckoning you back.

“Shit- Olivia’s looking for me,” you muttered, more annoyed than you meant to sound.

Quinn’s expression faltered slightly. “Oh. Right. Well… I guess I’ll see you later.”

You hesitated for just a second before offering a small smile. “Later.”

Then, with a reluctant push off the barstool, you made your way back to the deeper part of the pool and swam toward the steps. As soon as you reached Olivia, she wasted no time launching into a round of questions about why you’d been hanging out with her brother instead of her.

You brushed it off, deflecting as smoothly as you could. “What chapter are you on?”

That was enough to distract her. She went on about her book, and soon, the conversation drifted into nothing. Before long, you found yourself relaxing again, even dozing off under the warm Hawaiian sun, though a part of your mind still lingered on your conversation with Quinn.

After dinner, you and Olivia headed to the bar to unwind before it got too late. A lingering tension still hung in the air from earlier, but you chose to brush it off, letting Olivia distract you as she scrolled through Tinder, nudging you to rate guys between sips of your drinks.

The evening passed quickly in a haze of casual conversation and clinking glasses, and before long, you made your way back to the suite, the warm night air wrapping around you like a heavy blanket.

When you stepped inside after changing, you noticed Nicole already in her pajamas, her expression tired but neutral. Quinn was there too, standing stiffly as his mom dragged out a spare bed into the open space near the kitchen galley.

Olivia barely glanced up, already occupied with her phone as you plopped down onto the pull-out couch beside her.

It wasn’t until Nicole started adjusting the sheets that Olivia looked up, her brows furrowing. “Mom, what are you doing?”

You held back an annoyed groan. You already knew where this was going.

Nicole barely acknowledged Olivia’s tone, pressing the mattress down to smooth out a crease. “Your brother is gonna suffocate if he sleeps in the kitchen.” She huffed, setting the bed down just outside the galley kitchen.

Olivia scoffed. “So get him his own room.”

Nicole’s eyes flashed with warning. “Olivia. This is perfect,” she continued, ignoring Olivia’s attitude. “Quinn, you sleep here. You girls, be nice.”

You shot Nicole a small smile, hoping to ease the tension. She nodded in approval before disappearing into her room, her voice softer now. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight, Nicole,” you replied automatically.

Quinn sat down on his makeshift bed, shifting uncomfortably on the thin mattress. His expression was guarded, but when you caught his eye and gave him a small, reassuring smile, he returned it.

For a brief moment, there was silence. Then Olivia broke it.

“We don’t want you in here.”

You barely had time to react before she cut off your attempted protest.

“Leave.”

Quinn stiffened. His fingers curled into the sheets before he scoffed, anger flashing across his face. “Fine! I’ll sleep on the fucking beach!”

Before you could stop him, he grabbed his stuff and stormed out.

“Liv, seriously?” You turned to her in disbelief.

“What? It’s better this way, trust me.” She barely spared you a glance, already getting comfortable under the covers.

You knew arguing wouldn’t change anything, so you swallowed your frustration. But as you lay there, staring at the ceiling, unease crept in. Maybe you should’ve gone after him. Maybe you still could.

But the thought of drawing attention to how much you cared, how much you wanted to go after him- kept you frozen in place. So you stayed.

And then, hours later, the door slammed open.

You jolted awake, Olivia stirring beside you. Quinn stormed inside, dripping wet, sand clinging to his clothes and hair.

Nicole and Mark scrambled out of their room, their voices laced with confusion and concern.

“Quinn, where have you been?” Nicole demanded, taking in the state of him.

“I slept on the beach,” he grumbled, shaking water from his arms.

“Why?”

“Because of her!” He pointed directly at Olivia, his voice rising with frustration. “She made me! And now all my stuff is ruined! My iPad, my phone, my Nintendo- everything is soaked!”

Your heart sank.

If you had brought him back last night, this wouldn’t have happened.

Nicole’s expression darkened. Before she could say anything, Quinn stormed off, locking himself in the galley kitchen.

Nicole turned to Olivia, fury in her gaze.

“It was his idea!” Olivia defended.

Nicole shook her head in disappointment. Without another word, she turned and walked back to her room, Mark following with a sigh.

“Told you,” you muttered before getting up, already grabbing clothes for the day.

Breakfast was tense. Quinn had calmed down somewhat, though his mood remained sour. He sat stiffly, barely touching his food as Nicole’s patience wore thin.

“I need your computer, Mom,” he said flatly.

Nicole exhaled through her nose, irritation clear. “Well, I do have work to do.”

“What the fuck am I supposed to do all day?” Quinn snapped.

“Enjoy Hawaii. Get in the ocean.”

His expression barely shifted. “The o-” He hesitated. “I did see a whale last night. That… that was pretty cool.”

Nicole sighed, setting down her fork. “Well, you’re not sleeping out there again.”

“Mom, he likes it. He’s communing with nature,” Olivia said mockingly, rolling her eyes.

Nicole shot her a look. “It’s funny how you have so much compassion for strangers, yet you don’t care about your brother.”

Olivia scoffed, brushing her off.

Quinn spoke up again, his voice quieter this time. “I’m gonna need someone’s phone today.” His gaze flickered around the table.

His dad shook his head. His mom didn’t even entertain the idea. Olivia didn’t even pretend to consider it.

Then his eyes landed on you.

You hesitated for only a second. “Sure, you can use mine.”

Olivia’s head snapped toward you in disbelief. “What?”

You ignored her, unlocking your phone. “Here, let me just remove the password so you don’t have to ask me all day-”

“Dude, why would you give him your phone?” Olivia laughed like it was absurd.

You handed it to Quinn, ignoring her. He took it carefully, his expression shifting from surprise to something softer. “Thanks,” he said, quieter this time, but genuine.

Nicole smiled approvingly. “That is so kind of you. If only his sister was like that.”

Olivia ignored the comment, stabbing at her food.

The day passed under the Hawaiian sun, the ocean cooling your skin between lazy dips in the water. From across the beach, you caught glimpses of Quinn, completely engrossed in your phone. He looked happy.

When Olivia wasn’t paying attention, you smiled.

Dinner was a lavish seafood spread, accompanied by a special performance from local staff members. You tried to enjoy it, but Olivia and her mom quickly fell into another argument, souring the evening.

Afterward, you took a long shower before playing a few rounds of cards with Olivia, your phone still in Quinn’s possession. You won, much to Olivia’s dismay, but even that small victory felt hollow.

By the time it was dark, Quinn still hadn’t come back.

His parents had already retreated to their own space. Olivia was brushing her teeth, unaware of your growing concern.

You glanced at the clock. 11 PM.

When Olivia emerged from the bathroom, you made a silent decision, one you should have made the night before.

If Quinn wasn’t back by the time you finished getting ready for bed, you were going to find him.

With or without Olivia’s approval.

As you brushed your teeth, did your skincare routine and brushed your hair, you listened for the door opening but it never did. After fifteen minutes you came back in the room, Olivia had fallen asleep already and you knew it was the perfect moment to look for Quinn.

You snuck out of the room as quietly as possible, letting the door close behind you with a soft thud. Barefoot, you made your way down the hall before reaching the elevator. When the doors opened on the ground floor, you started to follow the signs to the beach. Presuming he was in fact sleeping there.

The cool air of the night blew across your skin, reminding you you were in soft thin pyjamas that didn’t provide much warmth. You glanced around but didn’t see him yet. So you made your way through lounge beds and chairs, heading towards the beach.

QUINN'S POV:

Quinn huffed, stomping his feet on the sand, for the second time this vacation he dragged a lounge bed towards the water along with his duvet. He still had your phone clutched in his hand. When you handed it to him he felt butterflies erupt in his stomach, you cared about him enough to give up your own phone and you trusted him with it.

He positioned the bed on the sand and got comfortable, pulling the duvet over his body. For a moment, he stared at the waves going back and forth. It was already dark but he didn’t feel scared, it was kind of relaxing to be able to sleep outside. Then he remembered your phone.

As he didn’t have to unlock it, it opened immediately. He was kind of getting bored of the mobile games and was thinking of what else to do. Would it be so wrong to take a look through your phone? He shouldn’t, but the idea was very tempting. Maybe he could find out if you somehow, in some universe, returned his feelings.

He knew it was a bullshit excuse but he was nosy, and how would you know? He started in your notes, nothing too special and mostly confusing things that were out of context. Next his eyes stilled on the ‘photo’s’ app, maybe he would find something on there.

His stomach churned at the idea of violating your privacy like this, but the urge to sift through it pushed the feeling aside. Clicking on the icon, the app opened.

Holy mother of god. Quinns mouth fell wide open as he was met with pictures of your naked body- in their shared suite.

Your tits on full display, your bare pussy too. There were about six different pictures, all were different poses. It must have been the night you smoked weed with his sister and had forgotten about it in the morning. Some were blurry but about four of them were crystal clear.

He couldn’t help it, his cock was swelling the longer he stared at your perfect body. Usually just the image of you in a bikini at the beach did it for him but getting to see your naked body- jesus christ.

Quinn felt horrible, he really did, he shouldn’t be seeing this. It wasn’t meant for him. Or was it? No, he shouldn’t think this way, it’s wrong...and yet his hand clicked on one of the better pictures, the full photo filling the screen. Your hot, naked, beautiful body filled the screen.

His cock was now so painfully hard, he had to take care of it, and he had already seen your naked body now. His free hand snuck under the covers, slid into his shorts and boxers. He let out a groan when his hand wrapped around his length.

Shit- this was so fucked up, but he was not going to let this opportunity slide. His boxers were too tight for his hand to move freely, he put down your phone and removed his hard on from his underwear. With a quick glance around the beach, he resumed his movements.

Phone back in hand, other hand wrapped around his cock again, he let out soft grunts as he jerked himself off to your picture. And fuck did it feel good, your naked body completely on display for him so he could pleasure himself to it.

Quinn tugged harder at his cock, letting his thumb occasionally glide over the precum that was now collecting in beads on his tip. Using it as a lube, it let his hand glide more comfortably over his length. “Oh fuck- yes-” He whispered to himself.

God he wished you did this on purpose, and right now, in his mind- you did. The thought spurred him on as his entire body burned with need. A sheen layer of sweat had spread over his skin. His eyes rolled back and lips parted in bliss.

He pumped his cock faster, eyes locked on the picture before him, he felt like he was going to cum already- much faster than normal. He was so fucking close.

YOUR POV:

Your feet got swallowed by the sand, making your footsteps soundless as you made your way down the beach. Eyes flicking over the horizon, you noticed a familiar mop of hair laying on a lounge bed. Quinn.

Feet carrying you faster, you almost reached him before you heard the quiet groans and heavy breaths coming from him. Was he- jerking off? Everything in you screamed to leave right now but when you got a bit closer, you noticed our own phone in his hand.

Oh. My. God.

Your own naked body filled the screen- the nudes Olivia took as a joke when you were high. You completely forgot about them, and now you saw how Quinn's hand was moving frantically under his sheet, sounds of pleasure escaping his lips.

Weirdly enough, anger didn’t bloom in you, but something else entirely. Your heart sped up at the sight of him, that familiar feeling starting to throb between your thighs. Was it even more wrong of you to get off on this? Clearly he was into you as well.

Before you could regret it, you walked to the side of his lounge bed. His movements immediately stilled as he scrambled to turn your phone off. “Holy sh- I’m so sorry! No- no- no- no, I- I’m sorry!” Quinn fully freaked out now, both his hands above the duvet.

He didn’t notice the smile on your face. “I’m so sorry! Please!” His eyes started to tear up, still he refused to look at you. “Quinn- Quinn!” You interrupted him. “I’m- I’m not mad at you. It’s okay-” He looked at you finally, shock plastered on his face.

“What?” He couldn’t believe what was happening, did you leave these for him? “Olivia and I got high and we did truth or dare, she dared me to take nudes, I forgot about them in the morning.” You explained, now taking a seat by his covered feet. He did not say anything.

“Do- do you like me?” You decided to ask instead. His entire face was red at this point, and he was embarrassed to admit to himself that he was still hard. Quinn nodded shamefully, he didn’t dare say anything, he was too ashamed of himself.

“Maybe I like you too.” As those words left your lips, Quinn’s eyes blew wide. Did you really mean that, or was his sister around too and were you playing a prank on him? “And...maybe, I find it kind of hot, you found those photos.” He still couldn’t believe it.

“What?” It was the only thing that he could say at the moment. Your laugh broke the silence. “You never noticed huh? Why do you think I’ve been trying to make an effort lately? I like you Quinn.” His lips parted once more, eyes still wide, was this a joke?

“I didn’t- notice, are you serious?” He looked at you, still in disbelief as you sat in front of him. You nodded. He looked around the beach, no one else was here. “Can I uhm- touch you?” Now it was him who nodded.

So you leaned forward, closing in as you scooted closer to him. His eyes were hooded, a pink flush across his cheeks. Quinn’s gaze was now on your lips. Your hand rose to meet the soft skin of his cheek, he closed his eyes upon feeling you.

Leaning in, you closed your own eyes, before your lips carefully met his. They slotted together perfectly and after a gentle sweet peck, you backed up. “How was that?” You whispered. “G-good.” He replied, his eyes opening, begging for more.

“Have you ever, you know, been with a girl?” His red cheeks deepend at your question, shame filled him once more when he shook his head. “That’s okay, would you like to?” A smile tugged at the corner of his lips and he nodded. “Tell me Quinn.”

“I want to, really really badly, especially with you.” He whispered, too afraid to speak up. You smiled and leaned in again. This time he met you halfway and you could taste the lemon soda he had earlier. But he didn’t back up, he placed his hand carefully on your thigh, while your hand rested on his cheek again.

It was him who deepened the kiss, growing more hungry by the second. Quinn couldn’t help himself when you placed your other hand on his neck and softly traced your tongue along his bottom lip, he whimpered.

You could feel how you were throbbing at this point, it had been a while since a guy had you this worked up. When he allowed you to fully tease him with your tongue, you too let out a muffled moan. Quinn was still hard beneath the sheet, and the kiss only made it worse.

He became more and more desperate, his tongue now met yours and it set your entire body on fire. You really hoped Olivia wouldn’t come out here, because if she did, she would be faced with her brother's tongue down her best friend's throat.

Your hand that rested on his neck gently went down his body, feeling his warm chest still covered by his blue t-shirt. So you sat there under the cover of the stars, sloppily making out with your best friend's brother.

After a couple of minutes, you couldn’t take it anymore. You needed to touch him, for him to touch you. So you separated yourself from him. “Would you like to take this further?” He nodded at your words, before his face fell. “I don’t really know what to do though.”

“That’s okay, I do, don’t worry. If you want to stop we’ll stop.” He chuckled at your words, “Trust me I don’t want to stop.” It earned a smile from you before you kissed him again. “Mh- I’m still hard.” He confessed, muffled against your lips. Did he want to spur you on more?

“I would absolutely love to suck you off, but I need you inside me right now.” You whispered once you parted from him again. His eyes followed your movements as you removed your pyjamas, your bare tits met his eyes and he couldn’t look away.

You removed your underwear as well, before climbing in his lap. “Don’t we need a condom?” He stammered out. “I’m on the pill, we’re good.” You said before pecking his lips. Then you helped him remove his shirt, finally you could gawk at him without it being weird.

“You’re so fucking hot Quinn.” You almost moaned, it drove him to quickly remove his shorts and boxers beneath the sheets. When you pulled back the sheets, you looked down to see his erection leaking pre-cum.

“Fuck- a good dick too.” You bit your lip, Quinn’s ragged breathing filled the salty air. “Please- It hurts-” Quinn begged, his hand wrapping around his cock to squeeze himself. You positioned yourself right over his groin and placed your hand on his to drag his tip through your soaked folds.

You both moaned in unison, it felt way too good. Already you were addicted. Quinn removed his hand to let you take the lead, allowing you to guide his tip to your entrance. You were so wet at this point, the head of his cock easily slipped in.

Quinn choked on his breath- it was the best thing he had ever felt. Finally he would know what it was like. He begged for you to continue, so you sank lower on his hard length, moans leaving your own lips as he stretched you out. “Fuck Quinn- you’re thick-” You gasped.

When you had fully taken him, you allowed yourself a moment to adjust. Leaning your forehead on his, both your breaths mixed. Quinn then set his feet on the lounge bed, preparing for your movements.

Stabilising your knees, and hands on Quinn’s chest, you started with gentle grinds on his cock. “Fuck!” Quinn strangled out, the way your walls clenched around him made him see stars. You too started to moan when you fully fuck yourself on his dick.

Switching between rocking and bouncing, you set a delicious pace as you both chased your highs. “Please- feels so good-” Quinn babbled as his hand now shot to your hips, holding you steady as you fucked him faster.

If anyone wanted to enjoy a nice night walk now, you were screwed. “Quinn! Fuck baby!” You lost your own mind, but you needed more. You couldn’t cum from just his cock inside you and you noticed he was already getting close.

“Put- put your thumb on my clit-” You breathed out. Quinn started to lightly panic, he had no idea what to do. After a while, you grabbed his hand and guided it between your thighs, halting your movements.

“Here, put your thumb- like that yes- and just press and move it- fuck like that!” Quinn quickly got the hang of it and you resumed your movements. Your mind was in the clouds and Quinn’s moans and whines only spurred you on more.

Sure his movements on your clit were sloppy as he was very focused on the way you bounced on him but it still did the job. His other hand couldn’t resist grabbing at your left breast, massaging it in his hand. He knew he was not going to last much longer, he wanted you to finish as fast as possible.

“I’m close Quinn- don’t stop-” You moaned, your mind going hazy and movements sloppy as you felt your orgasm near. With particularly fast movements from Quinn on your clit, your breath hitched and you clenched hard around his length as you came.

It was impossible to hold in your cries as your climax consumed you, you held on to Quinn for dear life, who tried to warn you before his own orgasm hit him. It was too late, with a cry of your name he filled you with his cum. The two of you holding on to each other tightly.

“Fuck yes baby fill me- fill me-” You gasped, his spent warm inside you. “Such a good boy-” He moaned at your words, he was sure he had never come this hard in his life. Wrapped around each other, you stayed like that for a while.

“Was it good? Your first time?” You asked, leaning back a bit to kiss his cheek. His dick had softened inside you, but neither of you dared to move. “It was amazing, thank you.” He breathed out, still on a high.

“Good.” You chuckled. It felt good to be wrapped up in his arms, to hold him. His spent still inside you, leaking out already. What you did not realise was a person standing far, far away at the entrance of the beach. Your eyes flicked over as you noticed them.

Shit- Olivia.

Dividers by: @v6que

#the white lotus #quinn mossbacher x fem reader #quinn mossbacher x reader smut #quinn mossbacher fic #quinn mossbacher x reader #quinn mossbacher x fem reader smut #the white lotus fanfic #quinn mossbacher fanfic #fred hechinger

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novaursa · 10 months ago

Text

The Wolf's Flame

- Summary: When you take your son flying, Cregan keeps fires warm for your return.

- Pairing: velaryon!reader/Cregan Stark

- Note: reader is referred to as Y/N, is only daughter of Rhaenyra, has silver hair and violet eyes and is bonded to a dragon. These events happen after Fires That Never Freeze. To read all parts in chronological order, visit my blog. The list is pinned to the top.

- Rating: Mature 16+

- Word count: 4 000+

- Tag(s): @sachaa-ff @daeryna @21-princess

Your fingers gently trace the downy softness of Alysane's silver hair, a mirror of your own. Her tiny eyelids flutter as she breathes steadily against your chest, her warmth a comfort in the quiet of the nursery. The light filtering through the windows casts a soft glow, making the strands of her hair shimmer like moonlight on water. She stirs slightly, letting out a small, contented sigh, and you can't help but smile, though it is tinged with sorrow.

You can still vividly recall the first time Jace held your son, Killian. He had been so careful, so reverent, as if the boy was made of the finest glass.

"He's got your spirit," Jacaerys had said, cradling Killian in his arms with a grin that could have brightened the darkest day. "And a bit of Cregan's stubbornness too, I reckon. He's going to be a strong one."

You remember how his brown eyes had softened, his usual warrior's stoicism giving way to a tenderness that was rare to see in him. You had laughed then, a light, joyful sound that echoed in the stone halls, lifting the spirits of those around you.

But now, that memory is a dagger to your heart. Jace is gone, another brother taken by the cruel hands of war and treachery. The Battle of the Gullet claimed him, like it claimed so many others, leaving behind only a hollow ache where once there had been warmth and love.

Your grip on Alysane tightens ever so slightly, as if you can protect her from the world that has already taken so much from you. She shifts in her sleep, her tiny fists clenching, and you wonder what kind of life she will have in this world that seems so determined to tear your family apart.

The door creaks open softly, and you glance up to see Cregan standing in the doorway, his gaze heavy with unspoken thoughts. His presence is a comfort, a solid anchor in the storm of your emotions. He steps into the room, his boots barely making a sound on the cold stone floor.

"She's beautiful," he murmurs, his voice rough with emotion as he comes to stand beside you. His hand comes to rest on your shoulder, a warm, steadying presence. "Just like her mother."

You smile faintly at his words, but it's a fragile thing, easily broken. "She reminds me of Jace," you say quietly, your voice barely above a whisper. "The way he looked at Killian… it was as if he could see all the good in the world reflected in him."

Cregan's jaw tightens, and he nods, his eyes darkening with shared grief. "Jacaerys was a good man," he says after a moment, his voice low and filled with respect. "He would have been proud to see how you're raising our children, Y/N. Proud of the mother you've become."

His words are a balm, easing the sting of your loss, even if only slightly. You lean into him, resting your head against his chest, drawing strength from his steady heartbeat. "I just wish he were here to see them grow," you admit, your voice thick with unshed tears. "To see the family we’re building…"

Cregan wraps his arms around you, careful not to disturb Alysane, who remains peacefully asleep in your arms. "We'll make sure they know who he was," he promises, his voice strong and resolute. "We'll tell them stories of their uncle Jace, of his courage, his kindness. He won't be forgotten."

You nod, a tear finally slipping free, tracing a path down your cheek. "I just miss him so much," you confess, the words breaking like waves against the shore.

"I know," Cregan whispers, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

For a long moment, the two of you stand there in the quiet of the nursery, holding each other close, sharing the weight of your grief. Alysane stirs again, and you look down at her, at the peaceful innocence on her tiny face. She is a beacon of hope, a reminder that even in the darkest times, life continues, new stories begin.

As you gaze at your daughter, you feel a small spark of determination flicker within you. You will protect her, protect Killian, and ensure they grow up knowing the love and legacy of those who came before them.

"I'll make sure they know," you whisper, more to yourself than to anyone else. "I'll make sure they remember him."

Cregan nods, his grip on you tightening just slightly, a silent promise that he will stand by you, no matter what. Together, you will keep Jace's memory alive, woven into the very fabric of your children's lives, a legacy of love and courage that even death cannot erase.

The chill of the northern wind bites at your cheeks as you stand in the courtyard of Winterfell, the ancient stones of the castle walls towering around you. The sky above is a pale, wintry blue, the kind that stretches on endlessly, promising the first snows of the season. Thraxata, your beloved dragon, is a dark silhouette against the sky, her massive form casting a shadow over the courtyard as she awaits you with the patient stillness of a creature who knows her place in the world.

Cregan stands nearby, holding Killian in his arms. Your son's violet eyes are wide with excitement, his small hands clutching at the fur-lined collar of his father's cloak. His breath comes in quick, excited puffs, visible in the cold air, as he watches you secure the last of the straps on Thraxata's saddle.

"Is Mama ready?" Killian asks, his voice high with anticipation, his gaze flicking between you and the towering dragon.

"Almost, little wolf," Cregan replies, his deep voice softened with affection. He adjusts his hold on Killian, allowing the boy to lean forward slightly, getting a better view of the magnificent creature before him.

You finish tightening the final strap and turn to face them, your heart swelling with love at the sight of your son’s eager face. "She's ready," you confirm, walking over to them with a smile that feels more natural now, more present. The cold air feels invigorating, as does the promise of the flight ahead.

Killian wiggles in Cregan’s arms, his excitement barely contained. "Can we fly now, Mama? Please?"

You chuckle at his enthusiasm and reach out to take him from Cregan, who hands him over with a tender smile. "Of course, we can, little one," you say, holding Killian close for a moment before lifting him up to press a quick kiss to his forehead. "But you must hold on tight, alright? Just like we practiced."

Killian nods eagerly, his little hands gripping your cloak as you turn to face Cregan. Your husband’s grey eyes are filled with warmth, the kind that always makes you feel grounded, no matter how high you fly. He steps closer, wrapping an arm around your waist as he bends down to press a kiss to your lips, a slow, lingering gesture that speaks of love and longing.

"Fly safe," he murmurs against your lips, his breath warm in the cold air. "And bring him back to me in one piece."

You smile against his mouth, pulling back just enough to meet his gaze. "Always," you promise, your voice soft but filled with the certainty that comes from years of shared battles and shared love. "We'll be back before the sun sets."

With a final kiss, you turn back to Thraxata, your heart thudding with a mix of excitement and the familiar rush of anticipation that always accompanies a flight. You cradle Killian with one arm as you approach the great beast, who lowers her massive head in greeting, her violet eyes shimmering with intelligence and recognition.

“Hello girl,” you whisper, your free hand brushing against her polished obsidian scales, which glimmer faintly with hues of violet and blue in the sunlight. Thraxata rumbles in response, a sound that vibrates through the ground beneath your feet, as if she’s sharing in the excitement of the day.

With practiced ease, you swing yourself up onto the saddle, positioning Killian in front of you. His small hands reach out instinctively to grasp the pommel, and you secure him with a careful, reassuring grip. He giggles with delight as he feels the warmth of Thraxata’s body beneath him, the thrill of the impending flight already bubbling over.

“Ready?” you ask, your voice a blend of both motherly concern and the thrill of the adventure ahead.

“Ready!” Killian exclaims, his voice filled with a joy so pure it sends a spark of warmth through you, despite the cold.

With one last glance at Cregan, who watches you with that same steady look, you give Thraxata the command to take flight. The dragon responds immediately, her powerful wings unfurling with a sound like thunder. She launches into the air, her great body rising smoothly from the ground as the wind rushes past you, carrying the scent of pine and snow.

The world below falls away quickly as Thraxata soars upward, the chill of the wind tugging at your hair and cloak, but the cold is nothing compared to the exhilaration of the sky opening up before you. Killian’s laughter rings out, a bright, joyous sound that echoes across the open sky. He turns his head back to you, eyes wide with pure wonder. “Mama, we’re flying! Look, we’re really flying!”

You tighten your grip on him, feeling the steady thrum of Thraxata’s heart beneath you, the power of her wings carrying you higher, above the walls of Winterfell and the endless expanse of the North. “Yes, we are,” you say, your voice filled with the same awe you see reflected in your son’s eyes. “Just like I did with my mother when I was your age.”

The dragon’s flight is smooth, a testament to the bond you’ve shared since her hatching in your cradle. She’s been with you through every trial, every loss, and every victory. Now, she carries your son just as faithfully, as if she understands that he is a part of you, a continuation of your legacy.

As Winterfell grows smaller beneath you, you feel a sense of peace settle over you. Up here, with the sky stretching out infinitely above and the world below far removed, it’s easy to forget the weight of your grief, the loss of Jace, the uncertainty of the future. Up here, there is only the sound of the wind, the warmth of your son in your arms, and the steady, powerful beat of Thraxata’s wings.

You glance down at Killian, whose eyes are now glued to the horizon, a look of pure wonder on his face. “What do you see, little one?” you ask, curious to hear his thoughts.

“Everything, Mama,” he breathes, his voice filled with awe. “I can see everything.”

You smile, leaning down to press a kiss to his temple. “Then let’s see where the wind takes us, my brave little dragon rider.”

As Thraxata glides effortlessly through the sky, you let yourself enjoy the moment, the rare freedom it offers, the bond between mother and child, between rider and dragon. And for a time, as the cold wind whips past and the world falls away beneath you, you are simply Y/N Velaryon, a daughter of House Targaryen, a mother, a wife, and a rider of dragons. The rest of the world can wait until your feet are back on solid ground.

Cregan Stark watches as Thraxata’s obsidian-black form rises higher into the sky, the great dragon’s wings beating with a rhythm that reverberates in his chest. He stands in the courtyard of Winterfell, eyes locked on the shrinking figures of his wife and son as they ascend into the endless blue, until they become little more than a speck against the pale sky. The wind whips through the courtyard, carrying with it the scent of pine and the distant promise of snow, but Cregan remains still, his gaze unwavering as long as they are visible.

There’s a sense of awe and pride that fills him every time he watches Y/N with her dragon. Even after years of seeing her soar above the battlements, it never fails to stir something deep within him. She is a true daughter of the Targaryen line, a force of nature bound to the skies, and it amazes him that she is his—his wife, the mother of his children.

As Thraxata and his family disappear from sight, he finally lets out a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding. A smile tugs at the corners of his mouth, a mix of contentment and longing. He knows she’ll be back before long, but there’s always that small pang of separation, as if part of him takes flight with her every time she ascends into the heavens.

With a final glance at the now empty sky, Cregan turns and heads back toward the Great Keep. The stone walls of Winterfell rise imposingly around him, offering a stark contrast to the boundless sky from which he has just watched his wife and son disappear. The weight of his responsibilities returns to him with each step, grounding him in the reality of the world below.

As he enters the Great Hall, the warmth of the hearth fires greets him, a welcome change from the crisp air outside. The hall is quiet this time of day, the usual bustle of Winterfell subdued, with most of the household attending to their duties. He makes his way down the familiar corridors, his boots echoing softly on the stone floors, until he reaches the chamber where his daughter, Alysane, is being tended to.

The door is slightly ajar, and as he steps inside, he is greeted by the sight of a nursemaid cradling the infant in her arms. Alysane is awake, her bright violet eyes—so much like her mother’s—tracking the nursemaid’s movements with the curious intensity only a baby can muster. The soft, cooing lullaby being sung to her halts as the nursemaid notices Cregan’s entrance.

“Lord Stark,” she says with a respectful dip of her head, adjusting her hold on the child. “The little lady has been a delight today, though I daresay she misses her mother already.”

Cregan crosses the room in a few long strides, his gaze softening as he looks down at his daughter. “She’ll have her back soon enough,” he replies, his voice a low rumble of reassurance. “Let me hold her.”

The nursemaid carefully transfers Alysane into his arms, and Cregan feels the familiar, grounding weight of his daughter settle against his chest. She’s so small, so delicate, and yet she has a strength in her grip that makes him smile every time she reaches out to grasp his fingers. Alysane’s eyes, so much like Y/N’s, meet his, and he can’t help the rush of love that fills him.

“Have you been good for the nursemaid, little one?” he asks, his tone lighter, more playful as he gently rocks her. Alysane coos in response, her tiny fists waving in the air as if to say, Yes, Papa, I’ve been very good.

“She’s taken to her feeding well, my lord,” the nursemaid informs him, a smile tugging at her lips as she watches the interaction. “And she seems to enjoy the warmth of the fire. Perhaps she takes after her mother in that regard.”

Cregan chuckles softly, nodding. “She has the blood of the dragon in her, no doubt. But she’s a Stark, too. She’ll grow to love these cold winds, just as we do.”

He spends a few more moments with his daughter, savoring the simple joy of holding her, of feeling her small heartbeat against his chest. It’s a different kind of peace than what he feels when he’s with Y/N, but no less profound. Alysane is a part of them both, a perfect blend of fire and ice, and he treasures these quiet moments with her.

After a while, he gently hands Alysane back to the nursemaid, who resumes her gentle rocking and humming. “Thank you,” he says, his voice warm with gratitude. “Keep her close to the fire. The day will grow colder before it ends.”

The nursemaid nods. “As you wish, my lord.”

Cregan leaves the chamber, his thoughts now turning to the evening ahead. The wind outside has picked up, and he knows Y/N and Killian will appreciate a warm welcome when they return. He heads toward the Great Hall once more, this time with purpose in his stride. The fires need to be tended, more wood brought in, and the hearths stoked to a roaring blaze. Winterfell might be a cold, unforgiving place at times, but it was also a home—a sanctuary for his family—and he would see to it that they returned to warmth and comfort.

As he reaches the Great Hall, he calls out to a nearby servant, a young man quick on his feet. “We’ll need more wood for the hearths,” Cregan instructs, his tone commanding but not unkind. “Bring in what you can carry and see to it that the fires are stoked high.”

The servant nods eagerly, hurrying off to fulfill the request. Cregan moves to the main hearth himself, where the fire is already burning but not nearly to the level he desires. He takes up a heavy iron poker and stirs the embers, watching as the flames leap higher, their glow reflecting off the stone walls.

As the fire roars to life, filling the hall with a warm, golden light, he steps back, satisfied with his work. The crackling of the flames, the scent of burning wood, and the comforting heat are all reminders of why he fights, why he endures. It’s for these moments—for the quiet, peaceful evenings after the storms have passed, when his family is safe and together under one roof.

He can almost hear Killian’s excited laughter already, the way his little boy’s voice fills the hall with joy whenever they return from a flight. He imagines Y/N’s smile, the way it lights up her entire face, and how her silver hair catches the firelight as she steps inside, Killian in tow, both of them flushed from the cold and the exhilaration of the sky.

The servant returns with an armful of wood, and Cregan helps him stack it near the hearth. The warmth is already spreading through the hall, driving away the chill that had begun to settle as the day waned. He can feel the sense of home building around him, the very thing he’s fought to protect, to preserve for those he loves most.

With the fires now blazing, he takes a moment to himself, standing in the center of the hall and letting the warmth seep into his bones. It’s a simple pleasure, but one he doesn’t take for granted. The flickering light of the flames plays across his face, casting shadows that dance along the stone walls.

He glances toward the door, knowing it will soon swing open, admitting his wife and son back into the safety and warmth of Winterfell. He’s ready to greet them, to hear about their flight, to listen to Killian’s breathless recounting of the view from above and to feel the reassurance of Y/N’s presence beside him.

As he waits, the fire crackling at his back, Cregan Stark feels a deep sense of contentment. There’s a storm coming, as there always is in the North, but for now, his world is warm, his heart full, and his family is safe. And that is all he could ever ask for.

The warmth of the fire mingles with the lingering heat of your bodies, still flush from the passion that had just consumed you both. You lie nestled in the soft, thick furs of your bed, the heavy pelts providing a cocoon of warmth against the biting cold that lurks just beyond the walls of Winterfell.

Cregan's strong arm is draped around you, his hand tracing lazy, soothing patterns on your bare back. Your head rests on his broad chest, rising and falling with each steady breath he takes. The intimacy of the moment is profound, the kind of peace that only comes after such intensity, when every barrier has been stripped away, leaving only raw, unfiltered affection in its wake.

His fingers slide through your silver hair, untangling the strands that had become tousled during your lovemaking, and you feel a contented sigh escape your lips. The connection between you is tangible, a bond forged not only in love but in shared trials, in the promises whispered in the dark and the strength you find in one another.

"Sometimes," you begin softly, your voice barely more than a murmur in the quiet of the room, "sometimes I wish I could be down there, in the thick of it, fighting alongside my mother. Facing the Greens with fire and blood, like we were meant to."

Cregan’s hand stills on your back for a moment before he resumes his gentle caresses. He knows how deeply the conflict weighs on you, how much you struggle with the separation from your mother and the battles you were born to fight. "You’re a warrior at heart, Y/N," he says, his voice low and full of understanding. "It’s in your blood, in your very soul. But you’re here now, and there’s strength in that too—in being the heart of this family, in raising our children with the knowledge of who they are and where they come from."

You nod against his chest, taking comfort in his words. It’s not easy to be away from the fight, to know that your family is out there, risking their lives while you remain here, safe in the North. But Cregan is right—there is strength in what you’re doing here, in the life you’ve built together, in the legacy you’re creating.

"I know," you whisper, tilting your head to press a soft kiss to his chest, right above his heart. "I know. But I’m grateful, Cregan. For this, for you, for everything we’ve found here in Winterfell. It’s more than I ever imagined for myself."

He shifts slightly, turning so that he can look down at you, his grey eyes dark and intense as they meet yours. There’s a tenderness there, a love so deep it nearly takes your breath away. "You’ve brought light to this place, Y/N," he says, his voice filled with conviction. "You’ve made it a home, not just for me, but for everyone within these walls. You are the heart of Winterfell now, just as much as you were born both of Dragonstone and Driftmark. And I will always be grateful for that, for you."

You smile up at him, a warmth blooming in your chest that has nothing to do with the fire. "And I, for you, my love," you reply softly, lifting your hand to trace the strong line of his jaw, feeling the roughness of his beard beneath your fingers. "I never thought I could find such peace, such happiness, in a place so far from the warmth of the South. But here with you, it feels like I’ve found something even better. Something that feels like home."

He leans down to capture your lips in a slow, lingering kiss, one that speaks of love and promises, of the future you’ll face together. When he pulls back, his gaze is serious, his expression thoughtful. "Winter will come soon," he says, his voice taking on a more somber tone. "The snow will fall heavier, and the North will sleep beneath its blanket of white. But when the spring sun melts the snow, when the rivers flow again and the ice recedes, the North will rise. And we will march south, to deliver the justice that has long been owed. Just as I promised you, Y/N. The time will come."

You see the resolve in his eyes, the fire of his conviction, and it stirs something within you—a spark of hope, of purpose. You’ve always known that the North was a place of endurance, of long winters and even longer memories. But with Cregan by your side, you also know it is a place of honor, of loyalty, and of promises kept.

"And I will be ready," you say, your voice firm with determination. "We will be ready. For whatever comes."

He nods, the tension in his expression easing as he presses another kiss to your forehead, his lips lingering there as if to seal the promise between you. "But for now," he murmurs against your skin, "we have this. These moments, this peace. And we will hold on to it for as long as we can."

You close your eyes, letting his warmth and the steady beat of his heart lull you into a state of calm. The world outside can wait for now—the battles, the struggles, the uncertainties of the future. Here, wrapped in Cregan’s arms, you find solace, a reprieve from the weight of the world, and the strength to face whatever comes next.

As you drift off to sleep, cocooned in the warmth of the furs and the security of Cregan’s embrace, you feel a deep sense of contentment settle over you. The future may hold its challenges, but in this moment, all is well. You are together, and that is all that matters.

#house of the dragon #hotd #hotd cregan #hotd x female reader #hotd x you #hotd x y/n #hotd x reader #cregan x you #cregan x y/n #cregan x reader #cregan stark

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singmyaubade · 10 months ago

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OKAY OKAY idk if you still do Eddie Munson if not it's fine but I just ended a situationship/fwb with a rude white boy, I lowk wanna see a fanfic. where Eddie has this relationship with reader, then he flirts with someone else and takes them to bed, and reader is just heartbroken,and gets revenge

toxic!eddie munson x female!reader

summary: you think I’d let him destroy me and end up happier than ever? no fucking way. he doesn’t get to win.

warnings: smut! 18+, cursing, very much angst, arguing, mature content, etc..

a/n: wow, you actually got me out of hibernation with this one. i haven't wrote eddie in a long time so bear with me but since fuckboys very much PISS ME OFF, i had to do you a solid and i hope you enjoy! as always, apologize if you hate this.

Your relationship with Eddie was not something that you could explain in a few short words. Of course, it was complex, complicated, difficult, angering, loving, warm.... But again, not something you could name with a few short words.

It had been about three months ago when you caught Eddie staring at your ass while you were playing dodgeball and he was sitting at the bleachers.

He had that sly smile on and his back leaning on one of the levels on the bleachers, staring at you intently. Not only was it enough to catch your attention but enough for you to keep looking.

All it took was a wink and a few whispers in the locker room for you to be hooked. But after, Eddie had made it clear with you that he wasn't ready to be in a relationship.

Eddie kissed your neck while his grip on your neck was harsh, "Listen baby, I want this so fucking bad but I'm not ready for somethin' serious," He whispered but the trance you were in only had you saying,

"Uh-huh,"

And since then, you had been stuck in a friends with benefits situation with Eddie Munson.

It wasn't the worse thing in the world but sometimes, it never felt the best. I mean, it wasn't like Eddie was an asshole who didn't care about you after you fucked or did anything. He would always cuddle you or clean you up when you felt tired.

He would always let you vent to him, give you kisses, and make you laugh. Those were the times when you felt like you could be more with him.

And then there would be times where he talked about Stacey Callahan's ass with a sly smile and glint in his eye, almost making you want to stab him.

You would shoot daggers into him but he would never notice because he considered you a friend.

And you could never tell him your real feelings because then you guys would be nothing and that seemed like a worse fate.

But at least, he never made an actual pass at girls in front of you and from what he had told you, he hasn't fucked anyone since you and him had started.

And that made you feel like you could be more.

But you were afraid you spoke too soon when you were trying to find Eddie and saw him and Caroline Blaren making out under the bleachers.

His hand groping her ass and her moans echoing throughout the gym. If it wasn't for the fact that it was after school, almost half the school population would've been cursed with this sight.

His mouth leaving hot kisses on her neck as he did with you a multitude of times, whispering sweet nothings into her ear as she giggled.

For the first time in your life, you had felt as if your heart had shattered.

A part of you wanted to make a scene, maybe go batshit crazy and curse Eddie to the brink of eternity and then the other part of you wanted to walk away, realize that you were worth more than someone who you thought cared for your feelings or for you at all.

Before you could leave the gym and maybe cry in a corner, Eddie locks eyes with you and smiles before he excuses himself and tells Caroline to wait under the bleachers.

She scoffs a little bit but twirls her hair as she stands there, mugging you.

You still have a shocked expression as Eddie approaches you, grinning ear to ear,

"I know I said we were gonna meet today but," He shyly cheers, "I've been trying to bag this for months and I really need this, Y/N, we can meet tomorrow though," He says as if this was casual.

You blinked at him as he awkwardly laughed at your expression, "Earth to Y/N?" He waved his hand in your face as you closed your mouth and swallowed.

You did your best to form a smile, "Uh- yeah sure,"

He cheered, kissing you on the cheek, "You're the best, I owe you one," He winked at you before going back to Caroline.

He put his arm around her shoulder before exiting the other way of the gym.

You couldn't believe that you let Eddie Munson break your heart.

There were multiple thoughts entering your head the sight of this.

One was that you were a complete idiot and let Eddie Munson play you like a fiddle. The second was that he had never taken you seriously. The third was that you needed to make him feel as you did.

And maybe it was petty for you to feel like you needed revenge but you couldn't let Eddie get away with making multiple girls feel this way,

Harmless to him but cruel to you.

And now you had to make him pay which you knew wasn't going to be easy.

Making Eddie Munson jealous was one of those things that was damn near impossible. He always prided himself in being as 'chill as a cucumber, when it came to his love life.

You had never seen him get jealous once and you didn't even think it was a feeling to him.

But you did know Eddie hated being ignored.

You remembered when he jokingly called your ass flat and you ignored him for an hour before he looked like he was on the brink of tears.

That was the one sore sport of his that you knew of and it certainly wouldn't hurt to use it to your advantage.

So when Eddie had called you that very night, you answered but not with the same eagerness you always had,

"Hello?" You answered, holding the telephone up to your ear.

"Hey Y/N," You heard Eddie's voice on the other side of line, voice excited.

You swallowed before answering back flatly, "Hi,"

He sounded surprised at your tone but didn't mention it, "Jus' wondering if you wanted to come over, Caroline just left,"

Your blood felt like it was boiling. It was as if he wanted a snack to go with his meal which only pissed you off more and it had been six hours, he had been fucking Caroline for six hours.

"I can't," You said, concealing your anger.

He sounded astonished, "Uh, why not?"

"Busy," You replied, annoyed.

You could feel your vagueness starting to worry him, "Busy with what?" He said snarkily.

"Stuff," You scoffed.

When did Eddie care so much about what you were doing? Maybe once he realized you wouldn't be at his beck and call any longer.

He took a breath, "What about tomorrow?" He asked, hoping your answer would be different.

"I'm busy, Eddie," You snapped.

There was silence on the other line for a few seconds that felt like decades before he replied again, "Is something wrong?" He asked, the worry present in his voice.

"No, I really can't talk right now, I'll see you later," You said quickly, putting the phone back on the link before he could answer.

You sighed, trying your best to feel as if this was the best decision. Of course, you knew ignoring Eddie wouldn't be the easiest thing in the world but you didn't expect it to be the hardest either.

Once Eddie gets fixated, there's not really a way to get him off the case.

And that turned out to be a fact when you saw him at school the next morning,

"Y/N," Someone grabbed your arm, pulling you in the custodian closet.

You made a surprised sound before realizing it was Eddie, "Jesus, I thought you were a murderer," You said, releasing your arm from his grip.

He ignored your joke, locking his eyes into your eyes, "What's up with you?" He asked.

You gulped, "I don't know what you're talking about,"

He scoffed, "You fucking dodged me on the phone,"

You rolled your eyes, "I told you I was busy,"

"You've literally let me eat you out before you had an huge exam in the next hour so that's a load of crap," He replied as you gawked, "So tell me what's actually up,"

You moved your jaw to the side, looking away as Eddie fumed in front of you.

You were lost for words but this didn't stop Eddie from waiting for answer so you gave one,

"I'm done fucking you,"

Eddie looked shocked, lost for words, he almost seemed as if he was having a stroke. He snapped out of his trance by laughing, "Are you serious?"

Your demeanor didn't change, "Deadly."

He bit his lip, almost wanting to laugh because this had to be a joke, "Baby, thats a big decision," His chest was against yours at this point, "Are you sure about this?" He asked, his breath whispering against your ear.

You could feel yourself breathing harder and a bit turned on but you knew this cycle wouldn't end if you didn't stop it. You pushed against his chest as he stepped backwards, "I'm done Eddie." You stated, walking out of the closet and leaving him in there.

You took a deep breath before walking to your class, it was hard to believe that you had just rejected Eddie and that he didn't utterly make you regret it.

You sat in class as you watched Eddie come on minutes after, always arriving after the bell. You could feel the tension radiating off you both but he didn't care to take a glimpse of you, his hard expression already telling enough.

You eyed him as he sat down next to you, a shocked expression on your face. Eddie had never sat down next to you in classes or let alone even show up.

You could already tell he was about to start fucking with you.

As Ms. Rodriguez started her lesson, you started to feel a fingertip tracing your knee as you swallowed. You looked at Eddie but he kept his hard expression, not even a smirk forming.

You watched him as his finger rose higher, almost at the hem of your skirt.

There was something in you that wanted to let him, maybe get your last taste Eddie before it was over forever but if you did this, it would never be over.

You knew this was Eddie trying to win and you couldn't let him.

In a flash, you grabbed his hand which caused him to finally look at you and you slammed it into his own lap. He looked furious and you felt a small victory as he pushed out his chair and stormed out while Ms. Rodriguez yelled for him to come back.

—————

The bell rang as you went towards the cafeteria, going to sit with the mutual friends you shared with Eddie.

Ever since you and Eddie had started hooking up, he had introduced you to his friends and you didn't actually mind sitting with them. They would always banter in front of you which always made you giggle and it was never superficial with them.

Usually, you would've sat next to Eddie but since shit hit the fan, you took a seat next to Gareth.

You saw Eddie shooting daggers into your soul but you kept your composure and ignored him.

You could hear them arguing over something about D&D which only made you laugh before Gareth noticed you, "Hey Y/N!" He beamed as you smiled.

"Hey Gareth, what are you guys talking about?" You asked, looking at him.

Gareth grinned, ready to start his tangent, "Oh so basically, we were talking about if Paladin or the Monk had more of a power bu-"

Eddie cut him off, "What are you doing?" He asked, looking at you as the table went silent.

You steamed, "What are you talking about?"

He began his theatrics, "I mean did I say you could sit here?" The whole table looked between you and him, there had never been one argument between you and Eddie, let alone one in front of them.

You sneered, "Why would I not be allowed to sit here?" You asked, wanting to kill Eddie for doing this in front of everyone.

"Well because, you don't belong here," He said, nonchalantly.

You laughed, "I don't belong here?" Your eyes were locked onto his, anger present in them.

"Yeah," He smirked which only made your blood boil.

"So since I'm sucking your dick anymore, I can't sit here?" You questioned, causing the entire table to gasp.

You weren't planning to reveal that you and Eddie had fucked several times but since he was really trying to get under you, there was no other choice.

"You can't sit here because nobody wants you here, Princess," He said, hatefully.

You looked at everyone around the table but they kept their gazes low, not wanting to go against Eddie.

Eddie was expecting pure anger to come out of you or maybe you would have to reconcile with him and you guys could go back to how you were but instead, you had gotten up and a smile was present on your face.

"I think I'm actually gonna sit with Jason," You slyly said as Eddie felt enraged, "I think that's a dick I actually would like to suck," You grabbed your tray heading over to jock table.

It wasn't exactly the best plan considering you hated Jason but Jason had been trying to get under you for years and this was the only way to get under Eddie's skin.

Your skirt rose up as you blinked dumbly at Jason sitting next to him, "Hi Jason," You sweetly said as he grinned from ear to ear.

"Y/N, what do I owe the pleasure?" He asked, him eyeing your body.

"I was wondering if you could teach me a few things about basketball at yours, I've got a research project," You said, fingers grazing his thigh.

It was not your best effort at being seductive but it was enough to get Jason Carver.

"I think I could help with that, mine at seven?" He said as you nodded.

You turned your back to see Eddie staring at you, more mad than you had ever seen him.

He was jealous.

And this was only the beginning.

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im-not-a-ghost · 8 months ago

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A portrait of your ideal partner

Who's your ideal partner according to spirit? Do you think your vision of an ideal partner matches what the spirit realm reveals? Curious to find out ? Select one of the following characters. For each group, I divided the deck into 3 parts : major arcanas, court cards, other minor cards. The major arcanas will represent the archetypal qualities of the person, the court cards will represent their physical aspect and the other minor arcanas will represent aspects of their personality that are more hidden. The theme for this reading will be Disney's Lion King.

Group 1

Major arcana | The Chariot

The Chariot is associated with the sign of Cancer, ruled by the Moon and ruler of the 4th house. This archetype is water influenced. Qualities that would be associated with this archetype would be the following : dynamic, caring, understanding, compassionate, empathetic, proactive, loyal, observant, home body, family person, sensitive, dreamy, creative, moody, overly cautious, has pessimistic tendencies, can be clingy and manipulative, tends to overthink. Your ideal person according to spirit would be someone that is viewed by society as a good parental figure, someone that is a good listener and blends well within society. A person that doesn't cause trouble and understands the need of acting and thinking as one. If we take a very rigid approach to things, someone that as a man would be viewed as shy, reserved, loving and sensitive. A bit of a lover boy energy, maybe someone that wouldn't be considered as "manly" by society because of their pronounced sensitivity. A pure gentleman. If we consider "women" from society's point of view, a person that would be described as "feminine" : the typical loving mother archetype that people expect to stay at home watching over the kids and taking care of the house while being absolutely lovely and always pampered. Of course this is very cliché, but again, we're talking about archetypes. These tend to be stereotypes. Your ideal person could be someone that has a lot of artistic hobbies, someone that isn't afraid to express their emotions and be vulnerable in your presence. In terms of physical traits, a person that has a lot of softness to them. Someone young looking, with round features and curves, a fond smile and sparkling eyes. Maybe someone with curly hair or kind of a fairy look.

Court card | Queen of wands

In terms of physical traits, spirit sends us the image of someone rather feminine looking, with luscious hair and a lot of warmth to their presence. They could be someone of a different ethnicity than yours. Overall, a very solar type of person. Someone that, on the oustide, looks very approachable, sociable, outgoing. Even if they're not. So someone that smiles a lot, that looks very open in their posture. A person that wears very colorful and bold clothing. Someone that takes very good care of their body, that has a lot of sensuality. So probably a person that works out or does at least one physical activity as a hobby. Someone that appears as warm, comforting, confident. So, someone with a trusty back and big arms that would give you the best cuddles. There's also a fondness to their eyes. When you look at them, you instantly feel like you're melting. Everything about this person's aura or appearance is inviting and tempting, makes you feel incredibly warm and protected. Someone quite tall, with a solid and athletic build.

Minor arcana | 7 of pentacles

When it comes to their personality, spirit wishes for you someone incredibly patient and reserved. Someone mature, that will not be afraid to wait for you and support you. A person that takes things slow and carefully, methodically. That does not rush to conclusions, that does not lose their temper when faced with an issue. A person that takes rational decisions based on solid facts. Someone that is careful with their money, time, actions. That will provide you with a safe environment in which you can bloom at your own pace. A person that is loving and generous, reliable, understanding of your limits. Someone that will walk along side you instead of ahead of you. A person that isn't afraid to work hard to ensure a healthy connection. Someone calm, grounded, that will take your opinion into consideration and value you as a person. Someone you could safely envision a future with, having your own family, if that was something you wished. Because this person would have all the required qualities and strength to make a reliable and amazing parent.

Group 2

Major Arcana | Justice

Justice is commonly associated with the sign of Libra, ruled by Venus and ruler of the 7th house of partnership. This archetype is air influenced. Qualities that could be associated with this archetype are the following : analytical, fair, witty, diplomatic, sociable, charming, cooperative, rational, indecisive, has a tendency of overthinking, sensual, can be irrascible and sometimes carefree, can be extremely cutting with their words. If we take a societal approach of the Justice archetype, we have someone that would be viewed as irreproachable, perfect. Well established, professionally accomplished, always neatly dressed and prepared in any situation. Someone well educated, efficient in their work, well spoken, that cannot be tricked or easily manipulated. Someone that can sometimes be ruthless and cold, especially in business. A person that lives their life ruled by their head and not their heart. A person that has a tough shell that protects them and is not easily swayed by life's struggles. Someone that is loyal, protective and goes by the rules no matter what. A person that will stand up for what they believe in. Someone that can be admired by others because of their ethic and charisma. A person that never backs down and never gives up. But also someone that has a lot of responsibilities on their shoulders because of that.

Court card | Queen of swords

The queen of swords as physical traits depicts an image of someone that may look emotionally closed off, similarily to the Justice archetype. A person that may appear as cold from an external point of view. This may be someone that wears a lot of suits, clothing that isn't that colorful but rather tight fitting and gives a bit of a strict vibe. This person could wear glasses. Give off a bit of a nerd vibe as well. Someone that is elegant, graceful. Kind of a cold beauty vibe. I kinda pick up on a bit of a scorpionic energy as well. An intense gaze that could be highlighted by long lashes, very graphic eyeliner and so on. A very pale skin. A prominent jaw. A bit of a frown. Someone that doesn't smile a lot. That may have a bit of a "RBF". Someone that doesn't hold eye contact a lot. That may look like they look down on people when they're just lost in their thoughts. A person with long silky hair, rather dark hair. Definitely a beard for men. Someone that looks dignified, maybe a bit haughty. Someone that would look like they come from royalty because of how they walk, how they stand. A person that could be mistaken as a statue or a model. But still with a very feminine quality to them. A cold kind of sensuality that leaves you frozen in awe at how surreal they look.

Minor Arcana | Ace of wands

In terms of personality, this person would be way warmer than what they let on. A person that is extremely driven, ambitious, passionate. A person that is fun to be around and that encourages you in everything you do. A person that can be your best friend. Someone that always sees the bright side of things and brings out the best of you. Someone daring, charming, adventurous. A person that has a bit of a unique way of thinking, a very unique personality. A person that likes competition and challenges. Someone that would bring out your inner child. A person that would make you laugh, remind you of how beautiful you are. Someone horny and kinky AF. A bit of a child sometimes, especially around you. Someone that would be soft only for you. A person that maybe doesn't like PDA but who would gladly accept it if it made you happy. Someone that would give you butterflies with every smile, every stare, every touch. That would never cease to love you. A very exciting person to be with, someone that would help you celebrate yourself and life. A person that is a bit of a trickster and has a cocky attitude that you just cannot resist.

Group 3

Major Arcana | The Sun

The archetype of the Sun is associated with Leo, ruled by the sun and ruler of the 5th house. Qualities and traits associated with this archetype include the following : optimistic, confident, outgoing, ambitious, charming, charismatic, competitive, admired by many, succesful, has egotistical and narcisstic tendencies, can be jealous and possesive, creative, loyal, warm hearted, can be stubborn and arrogant, sometimes controlling, generous, sensual, protective, has great leadership qualities. Society could view this person as the epitome of success and perfection. This is someone that could be both admired and envied by people because of their qualities and life style. A lot of people would agree that your ideal partner has a lot of charm and can get anything they want in life partly because of their good looks and social skills. This is a person that could be described as a play boy/ play girl, a smooth talker. People could think that they get the pretty priviledge, among other things. From an outer point of view, I feel many people would misunderstand this person's nature because they would mainly focus on appearances without really trying to get to know them at their core. This could be a person that faces discrimination in all kinds of forms because of that. People would get easily intimidated by this person's looks and energy. The archetype of the Sun makes me think of someone popular, that tries to be friends with everyone, that may tend to people please to be loved and admired. A person that may fear being lonely and runs away from their solitude by surrounding themselves with people or keeping themselves busy. I also think of a person that would be very active in life in general because they have a lot of energy to spend, someone that would appear in public a lot and speak a lot, someone loud, colorful, bold. A person that would be the first to stand on a battle ground should it be needed. A person that causes a lot of chatter and rumours unintentionally.

Court cards | page of pentacles

When it comes to their physical appearance, your ideal partner according to spirit is someone that is rather simple and discreet. This person would dress neatly and take care of their body but they wouldn't put too much effort into it as this isn't their main priority. This would be someone rather young, possibly younger than you. Someone that physically doesn't appear as intimidating as people may portray them to be. Someone that looks rather stable and grounded, trustworthy and kind. A person with a shy smile and avoiding gaze, that may tend to bite their nails or play with the hem of their shirt in times of nervousness. If this person is viewed as attractive and beautiful by many, they play it down a whole lot. This would be a person that doesn't play with their appearance or try to emphasize their beauty. They would tend to hide a lot of their body, wear clothes that aren't as fitting and complimenting as to not draw attention. So maybe they'd wear oversized clothes, hoodies and hats to hide their face, actual masks even. Even if they may be wealthy, they wouldn't wear expensive clothes but rather very basic ones. This is someone that looks very humble and respectful. They may tend to look at their feet, hunch their back. They may wear headphones a lot or look avoidant. Regardless of their gender or ethnicity, this person would have a bit of a soft childlike vibe to them. Kind of a lost / head in the clouds student look. Their appearance would feel very natural. So no make up. No tattoos. No aesthetical surgery or excessive jewelry. They would have a very "basic" body shape. Something that doesn't stand out that much. They're not excessively muscular but they don't lack muscle. They're not excessively curvy but their body doesn't lack volume. A very balanced and proportionate body structure, same goes for facial features.

Minor Arcana | 6 of swords

When it comes to their personality traits, this would be someone that thinks a lot and always tries to weighs the pros and cons of a situation. Someone that is very thougthful and understanding of people's differences. This would be a person that is a good communicator and listener. Someone that is patient and soft, that would make sure that you are not left behind or feel "less than". This is a person that would think of you first and make sure you feel included. Someone versatile, empathetic, that can adapt to any situation. Someone capable of adapting your point of view, even if it may not always make sense to them, because they know how vital it can be for a relationship to find a common ground. A person that wouldn't be scared to leave behind everything they own and everything they know if it meant protecting and ensuring a healthy relationship. Someone that isn't afraid to set boundaries and cut ties with what doesn't serve them or the connection. A person that would prioritize quality time and communication. Someone that would be accepting of your differences, that would be reassuring and help you gain clarity in times of doubt. Someone that doesn't fear change and can bring change in the connection should it be needed. A calm and collected person, resilient person. Someone that wouldn't fear your past but wouldn't stay stuck on it either. A person with great analytical skills that could help you see things from a different perspective, broaden your mind and allow you to explore the depths of your ideas and visions. A person that would travel the world with you and wouldn't leave your side, no matter where you are or what you do. That would stick with you through thick and thin.

#pick a card #spiritual pac

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justforyourlovee · 5 months ago

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Synastry observations -1-

Paid readings :))

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+ If anyone wanna ask about a synastry aspect , comment it here and I will post it in next synastry observation Post , tyy

ᯓᡣ𐭩 his Lilith conjunct your sun :It’s over. Very intense! HAWT. This conjunction can make a married man leave his wife of 20 years. Powerful sexual energy. Karmic. This will mirror the dark energy of the man to himself.Can he see his own demons and welcome them with love? Or does he reject all parts of himself?How this goes is completely dependent on the man’s ability to love all parts of him.

ᯓᡣ𐭩 their north node conjunct your sun :they light the way for your soul path this lifetime but won't be your comfort zone because it's nn so will be pushing you forward towards where your meant to be so you need to be mature enough to handle that energy because it involves responsibility and honesty with yourself.

ᯓᡣ𐭩 Seventh house synastry:When someone has a lot of planets in your 7th house, you’ll feel a strong connection with them. You’ll enjoy their company, feel comfortable, and trust them. Whether you’re doing something fun or just relaxing together, it’ll feel good. This bond can affect your love life—you might be partners or close friends who help each other with relationships. You’ll just *get* what the other person needs when it comes to love.

ᯓᡣ𐭩 Uranus square ascendant : this feels like you're both trying to find a balance between staying true to yourselves and being open to new ideas and experiences. The Uranus person might push you to step out of your comfort zone, which can be exhilarating but also a bit unsettling. I'm not saying it's a bad aspect but let's say it's a friendship , you and your friend are always on the lookout for the next adventure, constantly pushing each other to try new things and explore new ideas. The Uranus person may bring a sense of freedom and liberation to the friendship, encouraging the Ascendant person to break free from routine and embrace change BUT this can lead to a dynamic and stimulating friendship, it can also create tension, especially if one person feels like the other is pushing them too far out of their comfort zone. AND if it's a romantic relationship this aspect in any type of relationship add excitement for sure whether it sometimes conjunct the MC ( excitement in you career) or the IC ( excitement in your home environment or in your emotions in general) but this aspect can lead to conflicts maybe a lot of conflicts , especially if one person feels like their need for independence is being stifled by the other. It's like trying to find a balance between being true to yourself and being part of a partnership. If not managed well, this aspect can lead to a relationship that feels chaotic and unstable, with both partners feeling like they're never on solid ground.

ᯓᡣ𐭩 Sun Moon Opposition : When the Sun is opposite the Moon in synastry, the Sun person often feels drawn to the Moon person. They admire how the Moon approaches life in their own unique way, and there’s a sense of respect for their emotional depth. The Sun, being creative and expressive, appreciates the Moon’s different perspective. Once the Moon feels safe and knows they won’t be overshadowed, these two can become really close—like best friends or partners who just *get* each other. It’s all about mutual respect and giving each other space to be themselves.

ᯓᡣ𐭩 Lilith in the 10th house synastry: the Lilith person looks at the house person and thinks, "You’re going places."There’s admiration, but also this restless feeling like they need to prove something or even challenge the house person’s success. Instead of lifting each other up, they might push against each other, sometimes out of jealousy, sometimes just to see what happens. The Lilith person might feel like the house person represents the **kind of power or recognition they secretly want which can create tension.

Buy me a coffee(tip)

____________________________________

#synastry #astrology #astro observations #astrology tumblr #astrology observations #astro notes #free tarot reading #tarot reading #synastry observations #synastry aspects #synastry chart #synastry astrology #synastry reading #astrology blog #astroblr #astro community #tarot cards #tarot deck

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haxkattpress · 1 year ago

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Away Childish Things by @letteredlettered

I'm so excited to finally share this bind of one of my all time favorite fics! Thanks to lettered's generous binding policy, I decided to go all out.

This bind has a foiled cover and spine, hand sewn silk endbands, and thirteen custom chapter headers. It was also my first time rounding and backing.

You can find more pictures and information about my process under the cut.

For the cover and spine, I recreated the design of Beasts of the Field (1902) by William J. Long.

I wanted something that captured both the whimsy and maturity of the story, and this cover fit my vision perfectly. It also gave me the opportunity to recreate another antique cover from the public domain.

Unfortunately, the design was a bit complicated for my Cameo 4, so I was unable to fill the lines in. You can also tell that the foil did not adhere properly near the bottom, so the flowers are lighter than I would like them to be.

Because of the trouble I was having with my Cameo, I decided to foil the spine by hand. I deeply regretted this decision two hours later, and it took me four hours to finish foiling. My wrist still hurts!

Sewing the headbands was my absolute favorite part. I was encouraged to try them by a lovely binder on Instagram, and I ended up completely addicted. I splurged on some fancy silk thread so I could give this fic the royal treatment it deserves! I think they look like beautiful little caterpillars.

As for the rounding and backing... I'm not going to talk about it. Nightmare. Lots of nervous sweating. Emotional agony. Next topic!

I worked on the typeset back at the beginning of January when I had some time off, and it took me a solid week of obsessive editing to complete. My sister suggested that I use Harry and Draco's patronuses for the chapter art, but there unfortunately aren't many public domain illustrations of deer and foxes playing together.

It was at that point that I also decided that I wanted the animals to match the respective ages of Harry and Draco and the tone of each chapter. For the 13 chapters I ended up editing 25 different illustrations together. The bulk of these are taken from vintage versions of Bambi and Reynard the Fox. It's possible that a few stock images from 1980s nature books snuck in there, but I did my best to keep them all pre 1925.

I'm not a skilled editor, and some of these are worse than others, but I'm quite proud of what I was able to cobble together. On the final page I put a young fox and deer running off together. I wanted it to seem like Harry and Draco's inner children had been freed.

I'm a bit embarrassed to say that this bind took me about 4-5 months to complete! I started in early January, and went wildly off track learning how to round, back, and sew headbands. And then I was hit by some killer creative block that only lifted last week!

There are still many things I could improve on, but I'm so proud of everything that I learned and accomplished with this bind! A big thank you to lettered for inspiring me with such a wonderful story. <3

#book binding #fic binding #fanbinding #fanfic binding #drarry #away childish things #harry x draco #my binds

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georgiapeach30513 · 5 months ago

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Weight of My Sins, Part 1

Summary: You thought life on the ranch was over. Couldn't bear the sight of Kayce anymore, so you fled all the way to Texas. You found a new relationship. You lived. You got a degree. But you missed Montana more than anything, but he wasn't leaving Texas. Now you're back on the ranch, and you and Kayce both lived your life. But that draw to him is still there, even if you're terrified to let those walls back down again. No matter how much you crave him.

Pairings: Kayce Dutton X Reader

Rating: mature

Warnings: explicit language, 18+ ONLY

Word Count: 5.1K

Series Masterlist

*dividers created by @saradika-graphics

“Stop fidgeting,” Rip’s gruff voice bellows in the truck, and you press your hands under your legs. Continuing to stare out your window. The closer you get to the ranch the worse the feeling in the pit of your stomach gets. This has got to be a bad idea, and nothing good can come of it. You need a job just as much as you need a place to stay. And Rip did you a solid in getting John to allow that for you. Under different circumstances this would be the perfect solution to your problem.

“You’re going to stay in the bunkhouse, so I’ll have to go over some ground rules with the wranglers,” you roll your eyes as you turn to look at him. Ever the protective big brother role. He isn’t your biological big brother. Just a man that felt sorry for you as a kid, and helped out when he could. You were his pet project. And one of the few people he was kinda nice to. Some things never change.

“I don’t want you fucking around with them. And believe me, they’re a bunch of lonely, horny cowboys.”

“Aww, but you’re not interested in me. Are you still lonely and horny?” He gives you an eat shit grin, shaking his head. You are not the least bit worried about the wranglers. They are the least of your worries. “What if this doesn’t work out?”

“Grow a pair of balls and make it work,” he shrugs as the ranch comes into view. Immediately your fingers start fidgeting under your thighs. So many memories remained here. Up until the point that you left for veterinary school. Anything to help out the ranch. That’s Rip’s philosophy, even if he won’t say it. Anything.

“Quit fidgeting!” He growls at you.

“I’m not!” You don’t want to admit that being here is turning your stomach inside out. Don’t want to admit what just seeing the last name Dutton does to you. Some things just are better left unexplored. Especially now that you’re going into his territory. His home.

Rip puts the truck into park, and you inhale slowly. Letting the fresh air fill your lungs before you slowly exhale. Popping your neck for good measure before you sling the door open, and jump out. Time seems to stand still here. Very little has changed, except your age. “Come on,” your adopted brother says, and you follow along with his long strides.

Slinging the door open, Rip drops your meager duffle bag on the floor, and every man in there turns to glare at you. Lloyd gives you a slight dip of his chin, “Welcome back, Bronc,” you nod to him. The others you don’t truly recognize.

“This here is like a little sister to me. You treat her with fucking respect, and you stay out of her damn pants,” clearing their throats they return to their card game, leaving you puffing out a nervous breath before giving Rip a head nod. “Yep. That’s it,” he says, turning on his heels, and leaving you in this den of bears.

“Which bunk is available?”

“One of those back ones,” Lloyd points in the direction without removing his eyes from his hand. You didn’t expect a grand welcome, but this is pathetic. Your eyes roam around each of the bunks. Examining the spaces, looking for anything familiar.

“He’s not here,” Lloyd answers, finally looking at you.

“Who?” the old man’s eyebrows lift, as he nods at you sarcastically. Judging asshole. You weren’t looking for anyone. You were trying to figure out how you fit in with these men. Reaching into your bag, you stuff a few peppermints into your pocket. You sling your duffle bag onto the bunk before turning to go towards the door, “I’m going out.”

“Uh huh,” Lloyd answers knowingly. You didn’t care what the man thought of you. You need to get out of this room. It’s stifling being in this bunkhouse. Hell, it’s stifling being here. With all these memories. But ones that you love so much. You miss it.

Sighing at your contradictory thoughts, you kick gravel as you walk to the barn. Getting away from humans, and joining animals. They were better than humans. They didn’t offer any words of wisdom, or judgement. They are just there. Lifting up a peppermint to one of them, he eats the treat off your hand, and you lean your head against his nose petting him.

“First night here, and you’re already spoiling my horse, Bronc,” you didn’t have to see him to know that voice. The one voice that makes you weak in the knees, and sick to your stomach all at the same time. The one voice that has stuck to you like a bad habit, and you seek comfort in it with every sylablle.

“Dutton,” you respond before starting to walk away. He steps in front of you, and you turn to walk the other direction, but he jumps in front of you again. His mouth turns up into that irresistible smile, and ‘it just makes you angry, and also makes you want to touch him. The conflicting emotions just don’t stop.

“Why are you feeding my horse treats?”

“Why are you hiding in the dark?” He shrugs. A cute smile creeps onto his face, and you bashfully look away as heat flares your cheeks, “Did you follow me out here?”

“No, I didn’t know you were going to be here. Why are you here?”

Somehow him not knowing you are going to be living here floods you with relief. “This baby wanted a little treat, and I doubt you were giving him anything.”

“You’ve not changed,” smiling, you let your eyes coast down his body, freezing at an ugly ring on his finger, and your blood turns cold. Why is he even here giving you any ounce of hope? He notices where your sight is, and hides his hand, but it’s too late. Everything from that last night boils in your chest.

“But you’ve changed,” you try to smile, and it just hurts. You didn’t expect Kayce to not have a life and live it, but moving on with a wife is not what you expected.

“It’s complicated,” is the only thing he says as he stuffs his hands in his pocket.

“It always is with you, Dutton,” you respond, starting to walk away. This time he doesn’t follow. You can almost see him standing there with his pretty puppy eyes.

“We’re separated,” you stop in your tracks, but don’t turn around. Saying something like that is almost a death sentence. Separated did not mean they weren’t going to get back together. It could mean they needed space. And you weren’t going to be the space he filled. You sigh, turning to look at him.

“Mmm, I don’t know if that’s good enough, Kayce,” his smile doesn’t falter. You used his first name. Using that name is so much warmer than using Dutton. When you bring out the last name, he knows you’re slightly annoyed.

Walking up to you, his calloused fingers brush over your cheeks, and he pulls you in for a familiar embrace. Caressing your back as he brings you too close. Like your bodies were made to meld together.

“Don’t start something you can’t finish,” you respond, pushing out of his hold and you turn to give the horse a kiss.

Your body is on fire. Trembling as you take a step back from him. His scent of sunshine and leather blinds you. The want for him is almost too strong. “What do you want?”

He grunts, “You,” but you shake your head no. Everything is always so damn complicated with him. “We are separated.”

“And yet, you’re still married.”

“Do you think that if I was happily married I’d be out here after midnight? I’ve moved back to the ranch, and we rarely talk, unless it has to do with,” his voice goes softer, and your eyes slowly close, “My son,” the twisting of that knife hurts so much worse than hearing he’s married. “I never meant to hurt you.”

“Yeah. And I can imagine how it is with you. You come here to be separated, and somehow you end up feeling sorry for yourself, and lonely, and then you're driving out wherever, and right back into her arms to play house. Is that how it goes?”

“Not exactly.”

“Why is it different now?” There’s no answer that he could give you that would make you feel better. You’re left feeling like a junkie, and your drug of choice is Kayce John Dutton. Always was. Probably always will be.

“Because of you.”

“Oh, no. I just got here, and you don’t get to come here with your pretty words when I’m trying to do a damn job. You and your cute ass need to keep things professional. I don’t need this Kayce. It’s my first night.”

“So you don’t hate me?” You could never truly hate Kayce. You could have your heart broken by him. Again. But you’ve never hated him.

“No, but I’m also not fucking you,” he chuckles as you walk backwards, and out of the barn.

“Again!” He yells, too loud, and you hope that no one hears the two of you out here alone. You didn’t need any rumors going around about how you were fucking him in the barn on the first night.

“It was a mistake,” you wink at him. Lying in this instance is a way to protect you. There’s nothing that you regret with Kayce. Not on your end.

“And why was it a mistake?”

“Premature ejaculation,” he looks down at his feet, as he toes the ground, “Due to the fact that neither of us knew what we were doing. But it sure did get us into a lot of trouble, huh? Have a good evening, Dutton.”

“That wasn’t nice,” he peeks up at you, smiling anyways.

“Nice? Was it nice that I saw you with some girl in our spot? You sure were curled up, and enjoying her with your mouth. Was that nice?”

“Wait…” you have to rip the bandaid, and let him know that you knew what he was doing. You should have confronted him then. Maybe you could have truly moved on and healed. Maybe you wouldn’t have longed for Montana, and those pretty brown eyes still.

You shake your head, because you need space from him. He is crowding your thoughts, and your vagina. If you didn’t get away, you’d be rolling around in the hay with him. “I get we were teenagers. Too young to be fucking. And too stupid to remain faithful.

“So I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Like we have a choice,” he stands there smiling. Not fully defeated by your words. You weren’t bending to his words and charm, but you also weren’t refusing to talk to him. “Don’t wear the ring.”

“Whatever you say, Bronc,” you wouldn’t forgive him if he kept showing up with that ugly thing. It pains you to know that he went off and married someone and had a child with someone that wasn’t you, and you couldn’t blame him either. He’d moved on, and in so many ways you haven’t.

You hope you don’t regret this decision to be here. Hope that Kayce doesn’t infect your mind, and heart in the way he’s always done. Knowing that he’s married, even if separated, helps. And he has a kid. Time didn’t change your feelings because you still ache for him.

Separated.

What did that even mean? How did he define that word?

How long has he been separated? Were his sweet words anything more than that? Would he return to his wife? He has a kid with her, so it’s not like he can just walk away easily. Unless he already has. But how can you be sure that this is it? It’s the end and he’s never going to be with her again? And if he was sure, why not going through a divorce?

No. You’re here to do a job, and doing a job is what you’re going to do. You want to be treated just like everyone else on this damn ranch. You weren’t going to become a love sick puppy for him. You’re going to enjoy the Montana air. The view here. And finally doing something with your life. And for you.

“Bronc and I are going to take the back,” Kayce smiles at Rip, and the older man’s eyes narrow at him.

“Why?” he asks, giving you a quick look as you saddle up a horse, ignoring the conversation. You’ll go where you’re told. “Why are you bringing up the rear, and why is she even coming out with us?”

“Because if something happens, we have a licensed vet right with us. She’s bringing up the rear because she’s never gone out with us before, and this will give her a chance to learn.”

Rip places his hands on his hips, gazing out to the sunrise, sighing, “I’m still not sure why you’re with her. Put Jimmy in the rear with her, and — why the hell are you shaking your head at me?”

“She doesn’t know Jimmy.”

“And yet she sleeps in the bunkhouse with him,” Kayce clears his throat, and only because the last place that he wants you to be is with Jimmy. “What the fuck is your problem?”

“Bronc and I are taking the rear. Jimmy’s got flank. Is the bunkhouse really the best place for her to be?”

“Hell, Kayce, she’s not going to learn anything by getting special treatment,” you aren’t getting special treatment from him. He just wants to make sure you stay comfortable, and be with him. He needs more time to talk to you. “Fine,” Rip growls, getting on his horse. “She’s your responsibility then.”

“I’ll try to keep her out of trouble.”

Rip turns his horse around and heads towards the front, “Bronc, you're with Kayce in the back,” you sigh, climbing onto the horse. Kayce gives you a wink as he climbs on his own, and waits for you.

“You’re not subtle, you know?” He shrugs, and you can’t help but take a peek at his hand. The ring thankfully is gone. He kept his word. And while it does ease your stomach, there’s still a part of you that knows that still isn't enough. It’s easy to not wear a ring in private. It’s easy to pretend it doesn’t mean a thing, but it does. It should.

“Are you planning on making sure we’re always together?” He shrugs again. He’s the one that wanted you in the rear with him, and now he’s not talking. But maybe you’re just not asking the right questions. “So how have you been?”

“Doesn’t matter. I’m better now,” you scoff, keeping your eyes on the cattle. “What? Is my response not satisfactory? Remember you left Montana.”

“And you had your hands in some other girl's pants.”

He winces, sucking air through his teeth, “Are you ever going to let me explain, so I can maybe get your forgiveness? I told you I was stupid?”

“Are you ever going to do it again?”

“Are you ever going to go on a date with me?”

“Not anytime soon,” you click your tongue, and tap your heels on the horse. Speeding up a bit more, but he keeps his pace with you. “Things can’t go back to how they were,” you wonder if he thought any relationship can return to how they were before, or if you’re just the lucky one. Did he still carry a torch for you, like you did him?

“So no more sneaking off into my room, doing things we were too young to be doing?” Him and his stupid little smile get you every time. Not to mention the passion you always felt with Kayce. You were never going through the motions, you loved every moment with him. Even your fights that quickly were resolved, and you went on loving each other anyways, and loving harder.

“Why did you leave?” His voice darkens, and he turns his face away from you.

“I needed air,” he nods, understanding. You needed to get away from him. “Why did you do it?”

“Kiss someone that wasn’t my girlfriend?”

“You weren’t just kissing.”

“Yeah, that’s all we did,” you shake your head no. That is not what she implied happened. And just kissing is enough anyways. “It was stupid. And I quickly realized that she wasn’t you, and did I say that I was stupid?”

“You did,” you look over towards him, smiling, “But you can keep saying it,” a comfortable silence settles between the two of you, and you breathe in the fresh mountain air. Realizing all the reasons that you missed Montana, but also the Yellowstone. Things are peaceful in their way, of course, but there’s just this home feeling here.

“Did you miss it?”

“Do you mean did I miss you?” You turn to peek towards Kayce, and he chuckles, shaking his head.

“I asked if you missed it as in this?”

“Every day,” you enjoyed school, and you would do it all over again for the experience, and to say you have a skill. You did miss some of the people, and now that you’re here you miss some of the people in Texas. One of the people.

“What did — did you — I mean,” he clears his throat. Looking up to the clear blue sky, before back over towards you. You already know exactly what he’s struggling to ask, and it’s due to the fact he doesn’t really want to know. “How was Texas?”

“You want to ask me the real question?” sometimes it’s best to just know the truth, and lay it all out there. Even if you’re scared to know the answer. You can learn ways to cope or just get over it.

Kayce sniffs deeply, and tilts his head to the side in thought, “Did you meet anyone there?” Not the right question. He’s such a coward.

“Cowboy up, Kayce. You can do better than that if you really want to know. Just ask me like a man.”

“Are you dating anyone?”

“No.”

“Did you?”

“Was that so hard?” Surprisingly he nods his head. He can respond but just asking was like pulling teeth, and it kinda gave you a bit of a confidence boost. “I did. Was. I was dating someone. It was pretty serious, but he wanted to stay in Texas, and I wanted to be back here. We split amicably, and I packed up my stuff, moved out, and now I’m back here.”

“What was he like?” His jaw flexes when he asks. He doesn’t truly want to know what he is like, but you’re going to tell him anyway. Kayce always had a possessive streak. It never reached toxic heights, thankfully.

“He’s a mechanic. Older than me. He’s a good guy. He didn’t have much growing up, but he made something of himself, despite his setbacks,” Kayce just nods his head, refusing to look at you. You like seeing him squirm a bit. Not that you’re into comparing, but you didn’t have a child with him, nor were you married. “I think you’d like him.”

“Not likely.”

“He played football.”

“Definitely wouldn’t like him then. Let me guess, he’s just a regular ole pretty boy that treated you okay, but it wasn’t great? Maybe borderline annoyed you?”

“He’s a good guy. We were getting to a more steady part of our relationship. It wasn’t too exciting. And we never fought,” Kayce snorts, causing you to look towards him. “We didn’t.”

“Sounds like there was no passion.”

“You mean it doesn’t sound like us?”

“We’re adults now, Bronc. We’re not going to act like two lovestruck teenagers anymore. We were figuring ourselves out. We didn’t know the meaning of compromising. Now we’re grown,” no, you weren’t teenagers anymore. He’d definitely grown. At times you and Kayce just didn’t want to see eye to eye. There was absolutely no compromising in your relationship. So him admitting that makes you feel happy. You left something steady, albeit boring at times, because the two of you couldn’t compromise on where to live. He wasn’t leaving Texas, and you wanted to be in Montana.

“So just how boring was this guy?”

“Tell me about your son,” you counter. Kayce smirks while looking up ahead to the herd. You aren’t supposed to go out with them often, but you wanted to see the land again. “How old?”

“He’s eight.”

“You didn’t waste any time did you?”

“He wasn’t planned, and I was distraught. I don’t regret him though. He’s perfect. Reminds me of myself.”

“Did you love her?” He goes silent. His puppy dog eyes scan over everything as he contemplates. “I think I loved him,” Kayce turns to look at you, his smile now returning. “What?”

“Did you ever tell him?”

“Yes.”

“So did you lie?” It’s an odd thing to say, really. It shouldn’t be hard for you to admit that yes you loved him or no you didn’t. It felt right at the time but hindsight is always twenty twenty. Now, you’re unsure just how you felt about him, “So what you mean is you didn’t love him like you loved me?”

“No,” definitely not what you meant. Right? All those years weren’t a lie. You had fun. You enjoyed yourself. You loved, and felt loved, and — so easily left it for here. And Kayce. “I didn’t say that.”

“You didn’t have to,” he looks towards you, slowing his horse down, but your mind is racing too much to try and look at him. You need space again, and yet have to stay. You want to run, but towards him or away from him? You knew that the forever there complicated feelings towards Kayce would return the moment you saw him, but you weren’t prepared for this. And if you left again, those feelings would remain. Eventually you’ll have to explore those feelings.

Questioning your relationship was not something you had planned. You loved him, but could live without him. It’s why you chose to come here. Back home. And to him. So why is it so hard to admit that out loud, and to Kayce. Why does this man crowd your brain space, and make you question every decision you’ve ever made.

The only reason you left Montana was to get space from him. You needed to breathe and make sense out of everything going on. And to find yourself without him in it. Without anyone in your life. To know you could do it. Kayce was supposed to give you time to figure this out. You could have a life out of this bubble.

This beautiful, amazing bubble.

“Why did you come back?”

“This is the place that has always felt like home.”

“Because it’s where I’m at,” he sure is cocky. Brazenly full of himself. Part of this being home is him. But that doesn’t mean that you are referring to him as home. It means… “You can deny it all you want, but…”

Kayce clicks his tongue, and starts a faster gallop, leaving you contemplating what he said. It’s what he does. He weasels into your brain, and makes you think and question things. And then he finds himself in your pants, and then in your heart. But that isn’t the concerning thing, the concerning part is not fully knowing if he is correct. And do you want him there?

“You know what I always liked about that girl?” Kayce looks up at his dad, confusion laced in his eyes. “She never tried to change you.”

“Who?”

“Oh, are you still denying that you had a thing with Rip’s little orphan project?” Instead of responding, his son takes another bite of food. The two of you weren’t exactly quiet about your feelings for one another, but you also didn’t parade it around. “I see. So she comes back to town, being hired on as a personal vet or wrangler, I can’t keep up. And the first thing she does is go on the trail with you, and rides right beside you? Okay.”

John eats a piece of meat, smiling at his son who still says nothing. “You speak more when she’s around.”

“Are we going to talk about Bronc this whole dinner?”

“Still got that same nickname for her. How do you feel about her sharing a bunkhouse with a bunch of men?” Kayce despises it. Hates even thinking about someone getting too close to you. He’d offer for you to stay with him, but you’d immediately jump to conclusions. You could sleep where you wanted to, but he did have an extra room. “I see. Must make you sick to think about all those cowboys around fresh meat. We know Bronc can take care of herself. But she did just get out of a relationship because he didn’t want to take things to the next step.”

“He didn’t want to move to Montana.”

“Where she wanted to get married, and settle down with him,” John shrugs as he wipes his mouth with his napkin. “She’s quite vulnerable. Don’t push her, but don’t have her too far away from you,” he nods as he pushes his chair back from the table. “You should offer her some of the food Gator made. I’m sure it’s better than whatever microwave food she’s got there.”

—

There is a lot of freedom being here. However, the food sucks. You’ll have to remedy that soon. Sitting out on the porch, you kick up your feet, and inhale deeply. Letting the mountains absorb your problems. Hope that they will, so you have some clarity.

Even with everyone in the bunkhouse carrying on and playing a game of poker, you feel relaxed. Today felt good. You didn’t exactly know what your job here would entail; maybe you’d need to travel to some other ranches and tend to their animals. But tonight, it’s just you. And the annoying music coming from somewhere.

You won’t let it bother you.

You don’t care if it’s annoying ‘country’ music. What even is that shit? Nope. It won’t bother you. You’ll just sit and eat your microwave Mac and cheese, and ignore whatever is going on over there. This is your bubble. Your safe space. You are calm and collected. Not annoyed at all.

That music is just very obnoxious, and you swear it’s getting louder. You could ask them to be quiet. You don’t even know whose cabin it is. Someone that works here, obviously. But it’s like they're purposefully trying to get under your skin.

You sigh as you stand up stretching. Going inside the bunkhouse would involve you trying to ignore the wranglers. While not impossible, you’re now more curious as to who is being obnoxious. It won’t hurt to go check it out.

Making sure to throw your garbage away, you start to head towards the door, “I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” Lloyd calls after you, but you don’t listen. Don’t even turn around. You have some exploring to do.

You have to know. Need to know who it is. You don’t have far to walk judging by the sound. It’s close. Far enough away from the bunkhouse for some privacy. There’s nobody here that would hurt you. There could be other things that could be dangerous.

“What are you doing out alone?!” You spin around, and hit him due to your veins coursing with adrenaline. “Ow, you still got an arm on you,” Kayce winces, rubbing his arm.

“Why the fuck are you sneaking up on me in the middle of the night?” Whisper screaming as you hit him again. “What is wrong with you, and what is the deal with this shitty music?”

“So the music worked?” You stare at him dumbfounded, trying to figure out what he’s meaning. “It got you over here, didn’t it?”

“You ass, Kayce Dutton. I was minding my business, eating dinner, and looking at the stars.”

“Your dinner wasn’t good enough,” you have to look away when he licks his lips. Causing every fiber in your body to heat up. Being with him alone in the dark is a sure fire way to get you in trouble. You’re resisting the urge. You could fall for Kayce again, just not tonight.

“Yeah, and what are you going to do about it?”

“I brought a plate from the lodge,” bare minimum. Don’t fall for this. This is barely anything. You want him to work if he wants to get you back. And you know you shouldn’t rush into anything serious. With Kayce it will be serious. “I can heat it up. We can dance, talk, watch a movie, sit out here?” he smiles sheepishly, shrugging his shoulders.

“We’re not dancing to this shit.”

“Of course not.”

“And I don’t think dancing is something we should do,” he nods his head yes, agreeing to that. “We can sit out and stare at the stars, and I’m going back to the bunkhouse.”

“I have an extra bed.”

“But I won’t stay in it.”

“Why’s that?” Kayce steps too close to you, invading your bubble, and it’s hard to breathe. Be strong. Do not fall for this. If you want to be with Kayce the wait will be worth it. You want to be able to give you and him the best possible chance. Start from the beginning.

“Because I am weak when it comes to you, and I don’t want to be. So my happy little ass will walk right back to that bunkhouse, and I’m going to sleep there. And tomorrow is a new day, and you’re going to stop flirting so hard.”

“I can try and do that,” his hand brushes away the baby hairs off your forehead, and you fight not to lean into him. Glancing down to his left hand, you count this small moment as a win.

“Thank you,” you whisper to him before spinning around, and walking towards the cabin.

“Why?”

“If I have to tell you it doesn’t have the same gravity,” he smiles serenely before jumping in front of you to open the door. He’s had that ugly ring off twice now. It’s a small thing that should not mean much, and yet it does. You just hope that he keeps it off. Because you can’t handle another heartbreak like that.

Masterlist

@tis-thedamn-season @theinheriteddutchess

#weight of my sins #kayce dutton #kayce dutton x reader #kayce dutton x fem!reader #kayce dutton x female reader #kayce dutton x y/n #kayce dutton x you #kayce dutton fanfiction #kayce dutton fanfic #kayce dutton fic #kayce dutton fics #luke grimes #luke grimes character #yellowstone #yellowstone fanfiction #yellowstone fanfic

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floating--goblin · 26 days ago

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also very interesting to me that Fall For Me's creature is a whale, and missing limbs has a whalefall. call and response, like The Offering and Sugar in Sundowning

especially because gardens are this running motif - most obviously with the garden of Eden, but there's also "You are a garden entwined with all, you are the silence on sacred shores". Garden = stability, lush, solid land beneath Vessel's feet, contrasted with the ocean = chaos, confusion, ultimate perdition. His tomb.

So when he says "With my love as your garden, won't you fall for me" he's trying to convince this other party that he can provide that stability that will allow them to flourish - so laugh at Provider all you want, but it's just more directly expressing something that Vessel has been saying for several albums already

At the same time, it's not all bright - because the album is about descension, it's the lowest point of Vessel's journey, the darkest hour before dawn breaks. The whale is diving, and he describes his "fall" from Eden as "diving into crystal waters". He was not thrown out, but left bit by bit as his eyes were opened to the world beyond this utopic garden.

So in beckoning this other party to "fall for him" he is really asking them to fall with him. Because the waters are deep and dark, and in the "screaming silence" he needs to know he's not alone. It's very telling in my opinion that they chose to give each song a depth to signify this descension, and Atlantic - most likely about a suicide attempt - is at the top, while Missing Limbs - about lost/unrequited love and being left - is at the very bottom

The deepest point on the planet, where there's next to no life and no light penetrates. Where a whale's bones would arrive picked fully clean and never be seen or disturbed again. Love and the absence thereof will hurt worse than death, because you are forced to keep reckoning with a life of that person's absence - they will be your phantom limb

And so I think the whalefall represents both that process of grieving your love's loss and of coming to terms with it - because he hits (literal) rock bottom and then follows it up with TMBTE, a meditation on being changed and heading back up to the surface, culminating with EIA - an arrival to a new garden, new solid land beneath his feet. No longer Eden the "glory of innocence", because in order to stay in Eden one would have to never live at all, to exist in perpetual ignorance. But Arcadia is a similarly utopic land, only it's on earth - it's a possible goal, it's something tangible and something one must reach through their own efforts instead of being born there.

He had to go through this pain to "become someone new", and that took killing "the man he was the moment we left off" and crawling out of his corpse something more mature and stronger - like a moth or butterfly, another important motif for the band

it's just. all very well put together ok.

#sleep token

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soleminisanction · 7 months ago

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So a while back I ran the numbers to confirm a suspicion that fandom trends towards a trans Tim Drake, and there's a lot of bits and pieces around his canon material that I think contributes to that interest. But there's a particular, subtle one that's been poking at my mind a lot because I think it might actually be a pretty significant factor that nobody really notices:

His costumes.

The original Robin costume, the one Dick and Jason wore, is childish but exposing. It's innocent enough when they're being drawn as spunky children, but during the period when Dick's still wearing it into his late teens and early 20s, it's practically as revealing as a lot of the women's costumes (and, in retrospect, almost certainly laid some of the groundwork for him sometimes being sexualized by the art and writing the way female characters normally are -- George Pérez, at least, absolutely put him on display every bit as much as he did Starfire and Donna).

Damian's costumes, meanwhile, lean more into archaic/fantasy armor designs and are thus largely genderless outside some vague allusions to the codename's Robin Hood roots. And Steph's is, well, a minidress, and one designed to show off her figure, drawing explicit attention to her femininity.

But then you have Tim's most iconic costume, his original one, which is not only fully covering in a way the original look isn't, it also, by virtue of being designed in the 90s, sports a very specific feature: molded body armor shaped to look like pectoral and abdominal muscles. In other words -- an idealized male body.

Not every artist always included that detail, but it was an explicit part of the design that you don't see as much these days, at least not for teen heroes. Which means it's inadvertently the perfect costume for a trans masculine Boy Wonder. It's got built-in body shaping. The cape and tunic layers even help to make his shoulders look wider.

Tim's second costume, the OYL later suit, doesn't explicitly have this body shaping element, but some artists still hint at it in the same way that Dick's Nightwing suits do (ie, we assume they're not showing off their real muscles with skintight suits for safety reasons, but who knows). Plus it comes with the bonus gay longing of changing the colors to mourn the dead crush he's too deep in the closet to recognize.

And then you've got his modern Robin look which has the same kind of shaping going on in a sleaker, more subtle way, though it can vary from artist to artist how much the red part of his suit is drawn as a breast plate vs. a part of the bodysuit.

As a bonus, the design also has a tendency to make him look lean and lithe, in an interesting contrast to Damian who, despite being physically smaller than Tim, tends to have a presence that makes him come across as stockier and more solid, possibly because he's more heavily armored.

You even see this with some of Tim'snon-Robin looks. I've mentioned this elsewhere but, the original Red Robin look making him look older when the cowl was up honestly makes a lot of sense. That suit was originally designed for a Dick Grayson who was pushing 60 to conceal the extent of his age while still communicating his maturity and development. It makes sense that it'd work the other way, to make 17 year old Tim look like he's in his late 20s/early 30s.

It's tunic over a body suit design is also just aesthetically pleasing in terms of forming an elegant male body type, the same way a well-cut suit can be. Again, it does especially nice things for the shoulders, which is why I personally prefer it to the fully bodysuit redesign they give him in the latter part of the series. Although as we can see from the details in Marcus To's art, even that body suit has seams strategically placed to suggest muscles.

And then of course there's the 2016 Rebirth era Red Robin costume, which is just a more heavily-armored version of his classic Robin look that's trying really hard to make him look masculine and mature, which means... exaggerated muscles.

And the thing is, it's not that this doesn't happen with other characters' costumes. But for various reasons it specifically didn't happen with the other Robin costumes, like I described at the start.

Which is not something I think people consciously notice. But I do know that, when I was writing my transmasc Tim fanfic a few years before realizing that I myself was also transmasc, one of the images that solidified the story for me was how good it would've felt the first time a transmasc Tim put on his new Robin costume and saw the Boy Wonder looking back at him. And I remember specifically thinking about how nice the shaped armor would be for that sort of thing.

It's kinda funny how an obvious attempt to enforce gender norms wound up, for lack of a better term, backfiring, at least in my opinion. There's just something about exaggerating the masculinity of Robin, a role designed to contrast and foil the already exaggerated masculine ideal of Batman, that makes it feel like a performance.

#tim drake #robin #batman #batfamily #dc comics #transgender #transmasc #in contrast I'd also argue that Nightwing feels distinctly genderfluid as an identity #even if Dick feels pretty cismale out of costume #if that makes any sense #like. there's just something about the way that Nightwing gets 'gazed' upon that's similar but distinct to how the male gaze views women #and of course no one else moves the way he does #plus the identity was developed as a pair with Starfire who was always taller and stronger than Dick in defiance of gender norms #but he also doesn't feel particularly 'feminine' he's just not exactly a 'masculine' either #he's just 'Nightwing'#whereas Dick Grayson is undoubtedly a man just a different kind of man than Bruce Wayne

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girlkisser13 · 11 months ago

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hades cabin headcanons

children of hades

• it takes them a bit longer to realize that they’re demigods.

• despite their best efforts, plants will wilt and die in their presence.

• the hecate, hades, and melinoe cabins are in charge of setting up the halloween decorations and like to bring a bit of festive scariness to the camp by raising ghosts and skeletons.

• they’re really close with the hermes cabin because they can shadow travel in and out of camp with contraband.

• many gravitate towards apartment living. their uncomfortable, deadly auras, demigod training and sharp features keep them safe in dodgy, dangerous areas.

• they’re some of the most sarcastic people you will ever meet. they are characterised by a dry, deadpan and dark sense of humour.

• despite popular belief, hades is accepting of persephone’s demigods. he doesn’t directly interfere with their lives as long as persephone doesn’t interfere with his demigods.

• because there are so few of them, they have monthly "family dinners" in the underworld.

• the sass levels are not only off the charts, but wholly encouraged.

• they have a talent for blending in the background, making them excellent scouts and spies. their presence is subtle, preferring to work from the shadows.

• when their nightmares are intense enough, some will unconsciously summon the dead.

• they have resting bitch faces so people often judge them to be unlikeable and mean. growing up, many become bitter of this preconception despite their efforts to dismantle it.

• they become the monsters others see, at least on the surface. as they mature, they soften the resentment they have towards others mislabelling and vilifying them.

• they’re all really good under pressure.

• like their father, they are fair and just (provided they don’t hold a grudge against you). their word is their bond.

cabin exterior

• the cabin is a gothic-style building, with sharp, angular lines and a towering structure. the walls are made of solid obsidian, giving it a sleek, almost reflective surface that absorbs light rather than reflecting it.

• the entrance is framed by two large, wrought-iron gates that creak ominously when opened. the door itself is made of heavy, dark wood with intricate carvings depicting scenes from the underworld.

• a faint mist surrounds the cabin, clinging to the ground and giving the impression of a thin veil between the living world and the underworld. the air around the cabin is noticeably cooler, even in the heat of summer, as if the chill of the underworld seeps through it.

• instead of traditional torches or lanterns, the cabin is illuminated by greekfire. the greenish, ethereal flames burn in sconces along the walls, providing an eerie, flickering light that never goes out, even in rain or wind. the greekfire adds a sense of ancient, powerful magic to the cabin, making it even more intimidating and otherworldly.

• the cabin has subtle decorations like skull motifs and symbols of death, but nothing overtly terrifying— more a nod to the power and respect for the dead rather than fearmongering.

• the ground around the cabin is sparse, with few plants growing near it. there a few dark, twisted trees and wilted flowers that can only survive in the shadows. there’s also a small patch of asphodel that grows near the entrance, as a symbol of the underworld.

cabin interior

• despite popular belief, their cabin is actually the warmest at camp half-blood. this is due to a ventilation shaft-like furnace duct that comes up from the underworld.

• the floors are made of polished black marble, cold to the touch. they reflect the green glow of the greekfire inside the cabin. the marble is inlaid with intricate silver patterns that resemble ancient greek symbols and constellations associated with death and the underworld.

• the walls are made of dark, rough stone, giving the cabin a cavernous feel. they are adorned with ancient greek tapestries depicting scenes from the underworld, like the river styx, the elysian fields, and hades on his throne.

• the furniture and decor feature accents of stygian iron. the metal is used in everything from the bed frames to the candleholders, giving the room a dark, powerful aesthetic.

• the corners of the cabin are always shrouded in shadows, no matter how much light there is. these shadows seem to move on their own, giving the impression that the cabin is alive and watching.

• the beds resemble ancient sarcophagi, with dark stone frames and plush black bedding. the pillows and comforters are surprisingly soft, lined with rich fabrics like velvet and silk, offering a stark contrast to the stone surroundings.

• the cabin is unnervingly quiet, with a silence that feels almost heavy. the only sounds are the faint crackling of the greekfire and the occasional whisper of wind from an unseen source.

• each child of the underworld has a small personal shrine to honor their ancestors or deceased loved ones. these shrines are made of obsidian and are decorated with mementos, flowers, and offerings like coins or food.

cabin traditions

• they have a tradition of crafting small obsidian tokens, like rings or pendants, which they give to friends or loved ones. these tokens are believed to offer protection against spirits and negative energy, serving as a charm from the god of the underworld.

• if a demigod at camp dies, it’s tradition for the hades and thanatos cabins to take part in the funeral rites. they help guide the soul to the underworld, using a special ritual passed down through the cabins. this ritual is seen as a great honor and responsibility.

• each child of the underworld creates a "memory jar" where they place small objects, notes, or symbols representing significant moments or people they’ve lost. the jars are kept in a special alcove in the cabin and are said to help them find solace and remember that the dead are never truly gone.

• they maintain a hidden underground garden filled with ghostly white flowers, black roses, and even a few pomegranate trees. these plants thrive in the dim light of the greekfire and are said to be gifts from persephone herself. during the fall, they harvest the fruits and hold a small festival in her honor, believing it helps to keep her favor and bring balance between life and death.

divider by @astrumaur

#percy jackson and the olympians #heroes of olympus #pjo #hoo #pjo hoo toa #pjo fandom #hoo fandom #pjo series #hoo series #pjo tv show #pjo disney+#pjo cabins #hades #pluto #hades cabin #cabin thirteen #cabin 13 #children of hades

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obvithe-bestsoph · 10 days ago

Note

Hello Sophie ♡

I was wondering if you wanna play a little game by answering this question?

How would you rate the boys ( all the ones you write for ) on how all in / date to marry they are when it comes to dating?

Like 0 is not thinking about marriage at all

Like 10 is - one of their biggest dream is marrying the love if their life

( age doesn't count into it )

Have fun 🩷

how commited is he?

summary: out of 10, how ready for marriage are pedri gonzalez, pau cubarsi, ferran torres, lamine yamal, pau victor, eric garcia, pablo gavi, noni madueke, marc casado, marc guiu, hector fort and kenan kildiz? a/n: some of these were actually kinda hard lol masterlist requests genre: fluff. warnings: commitment/marriage(?) ig lol.

9.5 Pedri approaches love with quiet seriousness. He might not speak often about marriage, but once he’s in, he’s thinking long-term. Loyalty and emotional depth define him, he’d build a life with someone before ever making it public.

8.7 Pau doesn't enter relationships lightly. If he’s with someone, it’s intentional. He’s deeply grounded, surprisingly mature, and already the type to see relationships as a foundation for something lasting.

6.2 He wants to be the “marry my best friend” type but gets distracted by the sauce and his reflection a bit too much. Ferran is all about passion and vibes, but he needs a wake-up call moment (like losing you or seeing you thrive without him) to be like “wait…she’s the one.” Until then? He’s gonna treat it like it’s serious, but without doing the marriage thinking math behind it.

3.5 He’s not unserious, just deeply unbothered by the concept of marriage right now. He’s giving “let’s just see where it goes, you know?” Maybe he'll joke about marrying you in passing like “if you keep cooking like this I’ll put a ring on it” but he’s not building a Pinterest wedding board. Yet.

7.3 Warm, steady, and emotionally honest. Pau strikes a quiet balance; he may not talk about the future constantly, but his actions are intentional, and he doesn’t invest in people he doesn’t envision being part of his long-term life.

9.2 Eric’s a full “when I date, I date to marry” type of man. Like the second he falls, he falls. Hard. He’d be the one to send “goodnight, mi futura” texts unironically. Would definitely buy a ring six months in and hide it in a sock drawer. He wants to build something lasting, and he’s already named your hypothetical kids.

5.5 Emotionally constipated, but a secret hopeless romantic. He’s scared of commitment but also deeply loyal. He’d act like he doesn’t think about marriage but then randomly say stuff like “if we ever had a kid I hope it’d have your nose.” He wants forever, but you’d have to drag it out of him like pulling teeth from a chicken.

4.1 He’s a flirt. He likes the chase, the thrill, the attention. He could become a 10 with the right person, but right now? He’s still enjoying being hot and having options. Not unserious, but marriage is not a thought on his mind unless you put it there.

7.8 Solid, low-drama, loyal guy energy. He’d be the “I want to build something real” type and wouldn’t bother wasting time on something casual. Not flashy about it, not dramatic, but he's got that quiet "I want a forever home and someone to cook with" vibe. Like the golden retriever of long-term love.

6.8 Marc is playful and expressive, but underneath that is a surprisingly sentimental side. He might not lead with talk of forever, but he definitely thinks about it, and he means what he says when it counts.

8.9 Héctor is protective and intentional. He may come off relaxed, but he cares deeply and values commitment. Once he’s in, he’s in, and if he trusts you, he’s absolutely thinking long-term.

10 The most “date to marry” out of everyone. Fully in his love-and-legacy era. If Kenan is with you, it's because he sees you in his future. He’s got that deep, rooted kind of commitment energy. Would marry you in a heartbeat if he knew you were the one, and he’d be loyal like it’s his religion. No games. Just “you and me forever.”

#pedri gonzalez #pau cubarsi #ferran torres #lamine yamal #pau victor #eric garcia #pablo gavi #noni madueke #marc casado #marc guiu #hector fort #kenan yildiz #fc barcelona #chelsea #juventus

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torturedtypewritersdept · 5 months ago

Text

a fucked up sort of eden - pt. two

✯ pairing:

firefighter!rafe cameron x fem!reader

✯ summary:

Rafe Cameron was good on his own, steady and sure, despite his adrenaline based nature; he was good on his own. His sisters long line of blind dates on his behalf leads him to you and from the very moment you walk out on the dinner, he knows he will never be the same again.

✯ warnings:

mature themes, mentions of anxiety, nostalgia, heartbreak, domestic violence (not rafe), injury, ghosting, fluff and fear, firefighter!rafe, past abuse, awkward!rafe, firefighter lingo, smut, etc.

✯ a/n:

nothing!! please don't engage if you have a hard time with any of these topics <3 this first chapter was originally posted on my old blog @/illicitfixations, @/lovelornanonymity and i have rewritten + reshared it here and will finally be continuing the rest of the series :)

The firehouse had become Rafe’s home long before he ever became a firefighter. It began with his incessant need to fix things, his sister’s broken arm at age nine the first of many things on a long, long list of things that he felt responsible for. His moral responsibility led him to the army, where he had become a marine, a sniper to be exact. He had seen a lot of things for a skinny kid just trying to defy his father. Coming home had been an adjustment, living in a world where every noise wasn’t a threat, the biggest one of all. His moral compass led his course again like a broken compass stuck in the one direction. This time, it had led him to a life of volunteering with the men he now called his family.

Rafe lounged quietly in the living room of the firehouse, his copy of John Steinbeck’s East of Eden draped casually against his long fingertips. It’s a book, a story, that he knows well. He had identified early in life with Adam Trask, its main character. Adam is good-hearted, much like Rafe and his kind nature gets him into trouble. Again, much like Rafe. He cursed his sister in the same way that Adam’s brother cursed him for being his father’s favorite. But, with Sarah it was different. He wasn’t jealous of her. No, he cursed every hair on her perfect blonde head for being wrong about you, for not telling him that you were well – you. He cursed her for convincing him that you wouldn’t hurt him. His reality was very different as he watched you walk away from him, away from the corner booth in the hole in the wall restaurant he had met you at. Yeah, Rafe’s good nature got him in trouble quite a bit, but for some reason he found himself hopeful; hopeful that he’d run into you or he could convince his sister to give him your phone number. He hoped you’d give him a do-over. He hoped you were different in the way that he thought you were. He was brought out of his thoughts at the sound of the fire alarm sounding off, signaling to his brain that it was time to work. He sighed in contentment, a lazy smile plastered across his lips as his best friend, Topper, came into his view, smacking him across the head with the book that was previously in his hands.

“Let’s go, Cameron. Can’t you hear the bell going off?”

Topper asked, his lips turning up into a cocky, but annoyed smirk.

“I heard it, bud. I thought you’d do me a solid and handle this one for me.”

Rafe inquired jokingly and Topper responded with a low chuckle as Rafe rose from where he previously laid.

“Oh, come on, Rafferty! Don’t you want to go rescue a beautiful woman and let her stroke your savior complex or – your dick, whatever works.”

Rafe couldn’t help but roll his eyes at his best pal, following his suit as he slid down the pole and into the locker room, layering his body with his uniform and climbing into the rig.

—

Your morning had been simple, a cup of coffee and your favorite book, Irene Hunt’s classic The Lottery Rose. Though you didn’t know it, you were much like Rafe in regard to your ability to empathize and place yourself within a character’s proximity. In the same way that he related to Adam’s character, you related to Georgie’s as the novel carries you through his life as a child experiencing domestic violence and his journey to healing as he escapes its hold. You felt it mirrored your life in a way – Georgie’s broken arm and your broken heart seemingly two shards from the same cut of glass, melding together like only broken pieces can. The book had saved your life in a lot of ways, the most prevalent one being that a kind nurse had given it to you to read in the hospital after your attack. You’d had a lot of feelings to work through and the book – it just helped in ways even you couldn’t understand and you’d reread it once a month ever since.

You lounged on your sofa, dog-earring the page you were set to stop on as you read the last words of it before you rose easily from where you sat, grabbing your coffee cup in search of another round of caffeine. You made your way into the kitchen, placing your cup underneath the hood of your keurig as you placed another coffee pod into the canister and latched it closed, a resounding pop could be heard against the low hum of the wind as it brustled through the french doors just off of your third floor balcony. You listened to the sweet sound of your coffee pouring, the echo against your cup sending you into sweet bliss as the smell simultaneously hit your nose. As it finished and you began, stirring the french vanilla creamer into your cup of joe, you heard a faint meow and suddenly realized you had no idea where your cat, jackson, currently resided. You continue stirring your cup, when you heard it again. Though, this time, it sounded more like he was whining. Your feet padded across your living room quickly, the plush white carpet melding into the curve of your feet, following the other faint meows that you heard coming directly from your balcony. You thought nothing of it, moving quickly to open the doors and bring him inside. But, to your surprise, he wasn’t laying in the patio chair or on the rug. No – he was nowhere to be found and as your heart began to race, your anxiety-inducing feline meowed again, this time, rather loudly. It sounded like he was calling for help and as you looked up, you met his green eyes where he stood – in the tree across from your balcony.

“Hey, buddy. You’ve gotten yourself in a predicament there, huh?”

You asked, amusedly. He only responded with a meow that sounded more like a screech from a banshee.

“Okay, okay, okay — I’m coming, buddy. Stay right there.”

You said in trepidation.

You moved quickly, not caring about anything other than getting your sweet boy back into your apartment safely. You slid only the white bunny slippers that sat next to your couch on your feet and ran out of the door with only your phone in your hand.

—

You stood underneath the oak tree that Jackson sat in, peering up at him through the leaves with one hand attempting to shield your eyes from the sun. The emerald colored leaves shook gently as the wind blew through them and Jackson's fearful meows echoed through your ears bringing tears to your eyes for the third time. You had tried tirelessly for the last hour to get him to jump down to you, assuring him you’d be there to catch him. But, he wasn’t interested. He was scared of everything, just like you and you couldn’t blame him really for taking after his mother.

“Jackson! Goddamit — please, baby! Just jump. Mama’s right here.”

You yelled exasperatedly, throwing your head back in defeat as you pondered finding a ladder and potentially breaking your neck was worth it. But, just as the thought crossed your mind, you felt a hand on your back, physically jumping at the foreign assault.

“Remove your hand from my back. Now.”

You gritted out, turning around to meet the eyes of a firefighter. He was cute in a I-go-the-gym-seven-days-a-week kind of way. But, he was currently crossing your boundaries so you weren’t interested, in fact, you were fucking disgusted.

“Calm down, princess.”

He does his best to soothe you in the middle of your freak out, though he does it in such a condescending way that it reminds you of your arch enemy, Taylor and his fists and just as you’re about to have a full blown panic attack you hear a voice you recognize. It’s sweet, yet savory, similar to a crepe on a Sunday morning. You turn toward the sound, your vision slightly blurry at the stress due to trauma that your body is responding to. The stranger that you now know as Rafe stands in front of you, his voice coaxing you out of the thick cloud of stress that lingered over you.

“Hi, y/n. How are you?”

He asks, smiling politely and you can only nod as you swallow thickly.

“I don’t like this guy very much.”

You whisper to him, your eyes looking in Topper’s direction and Rafe chuckles lowly.

“Sometimes, I don’t either.”

He whispers back to you and it elicited a deep laugh to erupt from the volcano of your belly.

“Rude!”

Topper groans, throwing his hands up in response and Rafe isn’t sure what it is, but the way your doe eyes are pulling him, is other worldly and all he wants to do is protect you; currently from his very best friend.

“Top, i’ll take it from here.”

He warns lowly and you smile at the way the man known as Top scurries away with his tail tucked between his legs. You wonder if Rafe is some kind of boss of the firemen that now lingered in the parking lot of your apartment complex.

“What seems to be the problem, sweetheart?”

Rafe asks and for a moment, you almost let the pet name slide with how good he looked in his uniform, yellow and grey had never looked so good you were convinced.

“Please, no pet names. It’s just a personal preference.”

You said, voice more weak than you had intended. He swallowed thickly and nodded.

“Sorry, it’s just a habit. I like to use words like that to help calm people down when they’re scared. But, you seem to be okay. I’m sorry for overstepping.”

He responds with a kind smile.

“I understand. No worries. My problem is crouched on four legs up in that tree.”

You said, pointing toward the leaves above your heads and he nodded.

“Well, don’t fear, y/n. I’ll take care of it for you, i’ll get him down. I’m glad you called us. It’s nice to see you again.”

He said politely.

“You too, Rafe. But, I didn’t call. I think it was a neighbor. I was debating whether getting on a ladder and breaking my neck would be worth the trouble when your buddy came up behind me and put his hands where they shouldn’t be.”

You bit out, aggressively.

“Oh – well, I’m glad we got here when we did. I’d hate to have had to visit you in the hospital, don’t need you all broken, sweet girl.”

Blush rose to your cheeks at the nickname.

“Shit – sorry. You said no nicknames.”

He said, annoyed with himself.

“I tell you what – youc an call me sweet girl, i think i like that one. But, I need a nickname for you too.”

You said, eyelashes fluttering.

“What did you have in mind?”

He asked, chuckling.

“Hmm, let’s see. You’re a Cameron, right?”

He nodded in response, a crooked smile on his lips.

“How about RC? Do you like that?”

You asked.

“I’ve never liked anything more.”

He said with another roguish crooked grin.

“Okay, RC. Go rescue my kitty.”

You replied and he saluted you.

“Yes ma’am. Be back in a jiffy!”

You could only giggle in response as you watched three other fellow firemen bring Rafe a ladder and he climbed to the top of it. You were nervous that he’d fall, the nervousness of his sway at the restaurant at the forefront of your mind. He returned only moments later with Jackson in his hands and you watched with a smile as he soothed your feline friend’s anxieties with his words.

“All good, not a wound in his pretty little fur.”

He said, handing him over to you.

“You’re in so much trouble!”

You playfully scolded Jackson and Rafe giggled.

“Don’t be too hard on him, he’s just a curious little guy.”

He replied sweetly, rubbing the fur under Stumpy’s chin. His loud purr could be heard from a mile away, you were convinced.

“Well, sweet girl. I’ve got to go. But, I hope I see you again soon.”

He said, his blue eyes meeting yours again.

“Rafe, what time is your shift over?”

“About an hour, why?”

“I’d like to make you dinner, as a sort of do-over or a thank you, whatever you'd prefer.”

“I’d prefer the do-over I think.”

He responded cheekily.

“Me too. Come back here at 7. I’m apartment 3B.”

You said.

“Will do, sweet girl.”

He smiled at the notion that you really could want him after all.

“See ya, RC.”

You replied, giving his bicep a squeeze before turning and heading back into your building, Jackson in tow.

—

taglist:

as always, if you'd like to be added to or removed from the taglist, please send me an ask or comment on this post so i can keep track!!

@maybankslover @inthelibrarybtw @luvrcndy @silkylovey @yagirlwrites @obxbabygirl @rafeecameronsbitch @klutzy-kay24 @roseczbalt @allsmilesreally7 @akobx @pogueprincesa @hannaa20002000 @olymosity @stoned-writer

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roxygen22 · 5 months ago

Text

Bus Stop (Part 4)

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

Nic: Good morning

You grabbed your phone from your nightstand before you had even fully blinked the sleep from your eyes. A message from Nic was waiting for you. You giggled and kicked your feet in excitement as you held your phone to your chest. Last night wasn't just a dream, after all.

You: Morning!

Your fingers typed wildly.

You: You're quite the early bird.

Relunctantly tossing the warm covers away from your body, you got out of bed to start your morning routine, bringing your phone along so as to not miss anything. As you leaned over the sink to brush your teeth, you felt it vibrate on the tile counter. Just seeing his name on the screen made your heart beat a little faster.

Nic: I try to start the day with a run or bike ride. Just got back inside. Gotta hop in the shower and get ready for class. What time is your lunch break?

Blood rushed to your cheeks at the thought of him being soaked in sweat or lathered up in soap. Too soon, you cautioned yourself. Thank goodness he couldn't see you.

You: Usually at noon, unless a mtg runs long.

Nic: K. I'll give you a call on my way to the station, if that's OK?

You bit your lip. How to sound positive but not TOO eager...

You: Yes, please :)

The morning crawled and meetings droned on and on. Several times you caught yourself daydreaming, staring out the window or drawing abstract shapes on your paper instead of taking notes. As the clock ticked closer to noon, your knee bounced under your desk in nervous excitement, impatiently waiting for your phone to light up.

Like clockwork, your phone buzzed in your hand at 12:00 on the dot as you ran out to the rear courtyard for a semi-private spot to talk.

"You are quite punctual," you answered. Nic chuckled.

"I've been holding my phone in my hand just staring at it for a solid two minutes waiting for the right time. How has your day been?"

"Oh, [nervous laughter] I'm not exactly sure. I spent most of the morning off in la-la-land. I had a little trouble paying attention."

"Funny you should say that. I had the same problem in class."

"Oh, yeah? What were you thinking about?"

"You first," he teased.

"No, you."

"Alright, since we're not in person to settle this with rock-paper-scissors like mature adults, how about we both say it on three?"

You laughed. "Ok. I can appreciate a good compromise. 1...2...3..."

"You."/"Last night."

"Really?"/"Really?"

There was an awkward pause that was probably not as long as it felt. You broke the silence.

"I was stoked to see your message this morning. Confirmation that I didn't dream the whole thing up," you admitted.

"I haven't had a fun evening out like that in ages. I...I felt like- like you were just so easy to talk to."

"I had fun, too," you replied. "I, uh...I dreamed about that kiss. It's been - a while - since I've been kissed like that."

"Me, too."

"Dream or a long time since the last?"

"Both."

"Awwwww!" you vocalized. "Well, you don't have to wait that long again." Your boldness startled you, so you started backtracking in a panic. "I mean, if, uh, that's what you want. Because that's what I want. I mean...," you trailed off and groaned as you smacked your forehead with your palm. "I'm going to shut up now."

"Please don't," Nic replied. "It's adorable when you ramble when you're flustered."

"You do seem to have that effect on me." The tops of your ears burned with embarrassment at your admission.

He chuckled. "So I've noticed."

After a beat of silence, you asked, "So, just curious, how long has it been for you? It's been just over two years for me."

"Almost four years. I've been trying to work on feeling whole on my own before getting involved with someone again."

"Kudos for putting in that work on yourself. My ex did not. He projected a lot of pent-up baggage onto me. I've been on a break since. It was toxic and lasted longer than it should have, and I've been in no rush to get mixed up with the wrong person again.

"But now?" Nic eagerly implored.

"Nowwwwww I think I could be persuaded by the right person," you hinted.

"Ah, I see." He paused. "[Y/N], I...," he cleared his throat. "Do you like Italian food?"

Somewhat taken aback by the jarring transition, you stuttered, "Y-yeah, I love Italian." You worried that you threw him off by mentioning your ex. Maybe it was too much too soon?

"There's this great place near the bus stop where I usually get on at Lexington and 1st. I was thinking we could go get a bite to eat tomorrow after work?"

Whew. Maybe you didn't scare him off after all. "That sounds delicious. I'd love that."

"Great! I'll meet you at the bus stop and walk you over. But for now, you should probably actually eat something on your lunch break. I just made it to the news station and need to go get settled in."

You pulled the phone away from your face to check the time. You only had about 10 minutes left. "Alas, responsibilities befall us all. See you tomorrow?"

"See you tomorrow. Bye, [Y/N]."

"Bye, Nic."

You ended the call and stared down at the dark phone screen in your hand. The fading excitement felt like you were crashing from a sugar rush. You slowly got up from the bench and shuffled back inside to get your food.

Your coworkers were standing at the ready to interrogate you. They knew you generally hated talking on the phone, but this time, you were all smiles.

"Tell us all about him, honey," the receptionist, Henrietta, demanded. "We need some excitement around here."

"What? How did you...."

"Dear, you have lovesick written all over your face!"

You blushed hard. Before you knew it, you were encircled by colleagues rolling over in their desk chairs as you recounted spotting Nic on the bus and working up the courage to say hello, and how magical that first unexpected date and kiss were last night. Once they were done peppering you with questions and chairs were rolled back to desks, Henrietta came up to you and gave you a hug.

"I'm glad you are finally putting yourself back out there after that jerk, Matt. You deserve to find love again, and he sounds like a wholesome guy."

"Thanks, Etta." You patted her arm and gently squeezed. "Time for me to come down out of the clouds and get back to work, I guess."

Small text exchanges throught the rest of the day kept you going, but you craved to hear Nic's voice again. Tomorrow felt like forever away. You knew you'd need to distract yourself with a rare visit to the gym that evening to pass the time and wear yourself out.

You were walking to the bus stop after work when you felt your phone buzz in your bag. It was a long, repeated vibration - someone was calling you. You fumbled through the main section of the bag, cursing yourself for not putting your phone in the pocket it belonged for quick access. Once in hand, you stared at the screen. Nic?

"Hello?"

"Is now a bad time?"

"No, not at all. I just wasn't expecting to get to talk to you again today. I'm off work and walking to the bus. How was the rest of your day?"

"Not bad, but I have to say it definitely peaked at lunchtime. I wanted to hear your voice again."

You chuckled. "Same here. Sounds like you are walking, too."

"The meeting isn't far from the station, so I like to get more steps in if weather permits."

"Maybe your habits will rub off on me."

He didn't respond, but you could hear him breathing on the other end of the line.

"Getting up early routinely and going for a run, walking instead of taking the bus or taxi. I have a gym membership, but I'm the worst about actually going," you added.

"Oh," he replied, followed by anxious laughter. "Hey, I made it to the meeting spot. I'll talk to you later, ok?"

"Ok. Have a good night!"

"Bye, [Y/N]."

<><><><><>

There was no message waiting for you the next morning. Trying not to think anything of it, despite the strange end to the last two conversations, and to keep things balanced, you decided to send one yourself to start things off.

You: Morning!

You had already made it to work and started on your case load before Nic responded with a simple "good morning" in return three hours later. You were elbow deep in paperwork and couldn't break away to message again until lunch, which was later than usual.

No additional texts. And no call. Desperately trying not to overthink, you reminded yourself that he said he would talk to you later, so there had to be at least some intent to make contact. He had given you no reason not to trust his word, but you couldn't take it any longer.

You: Sorry for the radio silence. It's been a busy day prepping for a case.

Nic: No worries. At work, too.

You: Still on for dinner? I should be at your stop about 5:40

Nic: Yep, see you soon

You chalked his stilted, near transactional messages up to being busy at work. For once, you were grateful for the hectic pace at work to keep your brain from spiraling. At the end of the day, you gathered your things and took a deep breath before leaving the office. You reminded yourself that you were beyond capable of handling whatever the evening threw at you.

You boarded the bus and mindlessly watched the scrolling marquee of upcoming cross streets. Your heart rate surged with each stop that brought you closer to Nic. What if he wasn't there? What if he was acting strange because he's planning to cut things off?

The next stop was yours. You stepped off and looked around once you cleared the bus and breathed a sigh of relief to see Nic leaning against a nearby pole. One worry down. He walked over toward you.

"Hi," you said, trying to sound chipper.

"Hey." He bent down and gave you a small peck of a kiss on your cheek. He looked...sad. Not the greeting you had hoped for. "Ready to eat?"

Truthfully, no. But you weren't going to fill him in on your anxieties yet, so you just nodded and walked alongside as he led the way to the restaurant in silence. Something was obviously up. You could see an Italian restaurant sign up the street, but he paused before you made it there.

Nic stepped over to a nearby bench and gestured for you to sit beside him. You did so nervously, clutching your bag in your lap so he couldn't see your hands shake.

"Hey, listen," he started. "Before we, uh, go in, I...I need to tell you something. I owe it to you and to myself."

Your eyes widened. "Oh, God. You're not, like, still married or something, are you?" Your voice raised, garnering attention from passersby.

"What? No, oh, no no, not that." Nic reached out as if he wanted to hold your hand, but hesitated before pulling it back to his leg. He looked around to see if anyone was still paying attention and took a deep breath before locking eyes with you. "[Y/N], I am a recovering addict. I have been sober for about three years now."

That is not what you expected. Your brain churned through a thousand different responses, trying to figure out the right thing to say to such big news. Before you could say anything, he continued.

"I go to NA meetings every Wednesday evening. They reminded me that... that...if we are going to get to know each other, I need you to know me. Who I am. That is part of my identity and daily challenge to continue to be my best self." His shoulders fell as he looked down at the sidewalk away from you. "I also...I wanted to give you a chance to end this early if that is too much. You deserve to be with the right person, and I understand that that may not be me."

Nic jumped slightly when you hooked your finger under his chin to lift his head up, where you met him with a soft smile.

"That is nothing to be ashamed of," you replied slowly. "Thank you for sharing. I know that couldn't have been easy, but at least now I better understand why you weren't talking much today. I thought...I thought maybe I said something wrong yesterday."

"What?! No! Oh no, I'm so sorry that I made you think that." He pulled your hand up to his lips to kiss it. "You- you're a breath of fresh air. A fresh start with someone who isn't stuck on the image of the old me."

You released a deep breath you didn't even know you had been holding. "I must admit that I can't even begin to know what your journey has been like. Or will be like. But I'm willing to take things one day at a time to find out."

"One day at a time is all I can ask for." Nic gently leaned his forehead against yours. "Thank you."

You were enjoying the closeness until your stomach betrayed you with a loud grumble. Now that your worries had eased, you were terribly famished. Nic sat up and wiped a tear off his cheek, laughing as if a huge weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He stood and held his hand out to you.

"Hungry?"

"Starved," you replied as you stood and followed him toward the restaurant once again. "So what's good here?"

"Well, I prefer their spaghetti over their penne..."

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The End

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