#go my dummy objects go

[koniixzz73]

quick rant why do i have to witness pepole who get so upset over bfdi eliminations.

i mean yah the character is indeed cool but you lot should remember more often elimination does not equal not seeing them having screentime ever again in future episodes or videos sigh

[brionnnne]

note that i will only ever call mithrun "stupid" jokingly. by "stupid", i only mean "frustrating behavior that i am immensely familar with". seeing him do something that makes me groan aloud, closing my eyes, sighing "stupid (affectionate, mournful)". like when he fucking... his dumbass "i don't want to [use the bathroom] right now, so it's fine." oughh. i know you! i know you! that's not how that works!!! and he's smart!!! he's so smart... but god, god... he's kind of an absent professor. he's kind of a cloudcuckoolander. i love him dearly. he gets called a dummy, a little idiot, and i flick his forehead, a little bonk of hard-heads, like "try again, idiot. that's not how bodies work." and "ooh, 'that's not going to work'. yes it is. shut up, stoopid. stubborn little man, my god." rolling my eyes forever.

[hampterguts]

do all gender care specialists fucking suck in relation to gender care or is it just mine

[solxamber]

I loved the platonic Malleus helps Yuu get Idia fic and I was wondering if you could so something similar with Cater or Trey or Vil or Leona or Floyd? You can choose, anything like that would be amazing my liege.

you asked and i answered, i love this concept so much

Fae Courtship 101: Romance for Dummies || Floyd Leech

In your desperation to confess to Floyd, you made the grave mistake of recruiting Malleus for help—now the only thing you’re courting is death.

For reasons beyond mortal comprehension—beyond your own comprehension—you have fallen for Floyd Leech.

Floyd. Leech.

The man who treats personal space like a suggestion, bites people for fun, and once chased a first-year across campus while laughing like a slasher villain because he was “bored.”

The man who once tried to sell you to Azul in exchange for a really nice hat. The man who could, at any given moment, be contemplating something as simple as “what’s for lunch” or something as horrifyingly chaotic as “what if I threw the prefect off the third-floor balcony to see how they bounce?”

It’s a bad idea. Objectively, scientifically, in every single way, this is a mistake.

Grim and Deuce have been holding interventions. The ghosts of Ramshackle have been looking at you like they’re already preparing to welcome you into their ranks. You're rapidly losing the moral high ground in any discussion about Ace’s bad life choices.

But the heart wants what it wants. And unfortunately, yours wants to make terrible decisions.

Which brings you here, pacing alongside Malleus Draconia, crown prince of Briar Valley, king of ominous nighttime strolls, and your designated therapist for the evening.

“I just—I don’t get it, Malleus!” you wail, gesturing wildly as you stomp through the moonlit campus. “I should like normal people! People who don’t consider attempted murder to be a love language! I should have instincts!”

Malleus hums in thought. “Hm. Concerning.”

“Exactly!” You throw your hands up. “I should be running in the opposite direction! Instead, I’m over here, wondering if he’d bite me gently if I asked nicely!”

Malleus stops walking.

You stop too, looking over to see him gazing at you with a carefully neutral expression. There’s a brief silence. A beat. And then, slowly—gravely—he nods.

“Understood.”

You blink. “...Huh?”

He turns to you with the air of a man who has just accepted a sacred duty. “You have chosen a perilous path, Child of Man.”

You stare. “I—??"

“But fear not,” he continues, raising a hand to his chest in solemn promise. “I shall help you attain your romance.”

Silence.

A breeze rolls through the courtyard. A crow caws in the distance. Somewhere, Grim is experiencing a deep sense of foreboding.

“…You’re going to what?”

Malleus nods again, expression determined. “Leave it to me.”

You suddenly have so many regrets.

Grim looks at you the way a doctor looks at a patient about to flatline. Gravely. With pity. With deep concern for the irreversible damage.

"Okay, listen hench-human, I’ve let a lot of things slide, but this? This I gotta ask—do you hate life that much?"

You blink at him. "What?"

Grim waves his little paws dramatically. "First, you fall for Floyd of all people. That’s already a death wish. And now, you’re actually listening to Malleus for dating advice? What’s next? You gonna ask Kalim for tips on financial responsibility?!"

You open your mouth. Close it. You… okay, you really have no defense. But before you can say anything—

There’s a knock at the door.

And you don’t even have to guess who it is.

You open it to find Malleus standing there, his expression set in earnest determination. In his hands is a book that looks older than your grandmother. The kind of ancient tome that looks like it holds dark secrets, forbidden spells, possibly even a recipe for soup made from human souls.

Standing right next to him, grinning like a goblin, is Lilia.

You feel your soul leave your body.

"Ah, Child of Man," Malleus intones. "I have found it. The ultimate guide to fae courtship rituals. You shall use these techniques to win the heart of your eel."

"Oh, this is gonna be fun," Lilia cackles. "Do you know how long it's been since I’ve seen these methods in action? The devastation! The absolute carnage!"

You stare at them. You stare into the abyss. The abyss grins back.

Grim looks at you, his face a perfect picture of someone watching a loved one make the worst life decisions in real time.

"You’re really doin’ this, huh?"

…You sigh. "Yeah. I’m really doing this."

You are simply minding your own business, walking to class like a normal person, when you spot Floyd approaching from the other end of the hallway.

As always, you smile at him, because you have fully accepted your fate as a fool with horrible taste in men. You expect him to either grin back or threaten to suplex you for fun—classic Floyd things.

What you do not expect is the sudden sensation of a phantom hand shoving you forward.

And just like that, gravity wins.

You crash into Floyd with all the grace of a drunk goose, smacking into his chest with enough force to send both of you stumbling. Floyd barely moves (because he is built like a problem), but you rebound like a cartoon character, nearly falling over before his hands land heavily on your shoulders.

For a brief, dizzying moment, you stare at him.

Then, slowly, your brain remembers what just happened, and you whip around—

Only to see Malleus standing at the end of the hallway, looking extremely pleased with himself.

He gives you a smug, regal nod.

He is also holding a book titled "How to Romance for Dummies."

You are going to throw hands with a literal prince.

Before you can implode, Floyd’s grip on your shoulders tightens. You turn back to him, only to find him looking entirely too displeased about being your impromptu landing pad.

“Shriiiimpy,” he drawls, squinting at you like a judge in a courtroom drama. “What’s up with that, huh? Tryna tackle me first thing in the morning?”

“I—I tripped!” you stammer, trying to collect the shreds of your dignity. “I didn’t mean to crash into you, I swear!”

Floyd hums, unconvinced. Then, after a beat of consideration, he shrugs.

“Aaah, whatever.” His fingers dig just slightly into your shoulders, a slow grin stretching across his face. “You still ran into me, soooo… you owe me.”

You blink. “Wait. Owe you?”

“Mhm!” His grin widens, teeth sharp. “Now ya gotta hang out with me today.”

You blink again. Slowly. You could argue, but you have a sneaking suspicion that it won’t get you anywhere, and honestly? Maybe this is exactly the opening you need.

Maybe… Malleus isn’t that bad at this.

You take that last thought back immediately.

Because not even a day after that whole hallway fiasco, Malleus finds you again, pulls you aside with all the gravitas of an ancient ruler about to bestow divine wisdom, and insists that, in order to properly court Floyd, you must—

Compliment Floyd’s strength three times. At first, you thought, okay, easy enough, I can just tell him he’s strong and call it a day. But then—THEN—Malleus, in his infinite wisdom, handed you a quill and parchment and declared, “It must be in verse. Poetry carries the weight of true devotion.”

And now, here you are.

Standing in front of Floyd Leech. Holding a piece of paper with the most cringe-inducing attempt at poetry you've ever written in your life.

Floyd, to his credit, was already giggling the moment you approached with a look of sheer suffering. But when you clear your throat and attempt to actually read the thing—

"Oh mighty Floyd, with hands so bold—"

He just. Loses it.

Absolutely wheezing, doubling over, practically using you as a support beam to keep himself upright.

You glare at him and continue, determined to power through:

"A force unmatched, a tale retold—"

Floyd: "PFT—!!!"

He’s straight-up crying at this point. Tears. You swear you hear Jade laugh somewhere in the distance.

You don’t even make it to the third compliment. You just turn on your heel and walk away before your soul crumples in on itself like a dying star.

Malleus, watching from afar, sighs in clear disappointment. “You lack dedication,” he murmurs, shaking his head like an elder watching the youth fail at life.

You absolutely regret everything.

You don't know why you keep letting Malleus give you advice. Actually, no—that's a lie. You do know. It's because the second he heard you liked Floyd, his eyes lit up like he’d just been given a personal quest by the divine forces of romance, and now he refuses to rest until your love is secured.

Unfortunately, this means you are currently locked in yet another horrendous discussion about fae courting rituals.

"Scent-marking is a vital step in courtship," Malleus declares with the kind of grim authority that should be reserved for battlefields, not this. "He must recognize you as his."

You blink at him. "Oh, like giving him my hoodie or something?" That’s normal. That’s doable. That’s the kind of thing people do when they like each other, right? You’ve seen couples swap sweaters before. Maybe Malleus is finally onto something not-insane.

Malleus shakes his head gravely. "No. You must present him with something you have personally scented. Ideally, by rolling upon it."

Silence.

Rolling upon it.

You stare at him. He stares back. Completely serious.

You try to process what he’s just suggested. What he has just, with full sincerity, told you to do.

"Malleus."

"Yes?"

"You want me to roll around on an object like a dog and then give it to Floyd."

"Precisely."

You briefly consider just walking into the ocean.

It takes twenty full minutes to talk him down from this absolute lunacy and convince him that simply giving Floyd a sweater you’ve worn will do the job just fine. He looks at you the way a disappointed coach looks at a failing athlete.

"If you are not dedicated to the craft," he mutters, "you cannot expect great results."

You pretend you don’t hear him.

Fast forward to the next day, and you are sitting in class next to Floyd, who is draped over his desk in a deep and powerful boredom coma.

You pull out the sweater and awkwardly nudge it toward him.

"Here."

Floyd immediately perks up. Dangerously interested. He tilts his head, peering at the sweater like you’ve just handed him a rare treasure.

"Eh? What's this?"

"It's mine. You can have it," you say, trying to play it cool, despite the fact that your entire soul is trying to flee your body from embarrassment.

Floyd picks up the sweater and—without hesitation—presses his face into it.

You almost die. Right then and there. Instant expiration.

He leans back in his chair, grinning way too wide. "Heheh~ You smell nice, shrimpy~"

You barely manage to hold onto your composure. You are barely hanging on.

Malleus, watching from the hallway, narrows his eyes and mutters, "It is not the worst effort... but it lacks the impact of true commitment."

You ignore him. You ignore everything. You're just grateful that—for once—this wasn’t completely unhinged, and that Floyd somehow seems to like it.

"Nothing says romance like a meal made with your own two hands!" Lilia declares, slamming an ancient, definitely cursed cookbook onto the table.

You blink down at it. The title is in some language that makes your vision swim just looking at it. The edges are charred, the pages stained with substances you’re 70% sure are not food-safe, and Malleus—Malleus Draconia himself, looks a little unsure.

That should have been your first hint.

But you? A fool. An idiot. A desperate, love-struck buffoon? You press forward.

“Alright,” you sigh, rubbing your temples, already regretting this. “What ingredients do I need?”

Lilia beams, flipping to a page that looks like it came from an alchemist’s horror novel.

"Let's see! We’ll need:"

• Moonshade Truffle,

• A pinch of Sablethorn Dust,

• Three drops of Evernight Basilisk Extract,

• Seven Tears of a Joyful Banshee,

• And a Love-Smitten Fire Spirit’s Breath!

…

You stare.

"Lilia."

"Yes, beastie?"

"These sound like potion ingredients."

"Oh-ho!" Lilia chuckles, waving a hand. "You humans always get so caught up in technicalities. But what is cooking if not a kind of magic?"

…No. No, this is actual magic. You are not making a love potion, but this sure as hell sounds like one.

But, like the fool you are, you go along with it. You spend far too much money (your entire savings) at Azul’s Most Definitely Not a Scam Emporium for all of these ridiculous ingredients. He knows you’re up to something dumb. He does not care. He simply profits.

And now, here you are. In the Ramshackle kitchen. Grim watches from a safe distance behind a chair. Malleus stands off to the side with his arms crossed, looking like he is rethinking his life choices. And Lilia, that menace, is watching you mix the ingredients like a proud mentor.

Everything is going fine. Suspiciously fine.

And then—

"Alright, time to bake it!" Lilia claps his hands. "It says here to bake at 350 for 20 minutes!"

You nod. This is reasonable.

"However!" He flips the page. "In the olden days, we used a slightly different method."

Malleus frowns. Your stomach drops.

"Instead of 350 for 20 minutes…" Lilia hums. "It says here—750 for 10!"

…

"What."

"Don’t be shy! Give it a try!" Lilia gestures for you to do it.

Malleus shifts, looking like he wants to intervene. Grim is slowly backing out of the room. You ignore all of this.

Because you are an idiot.

You turn the oven to 750. You shove the pan inside. You watch in real-time as your dignity burns.

The oven makes a sound ovens should not make.

Something explodes. The smell is indescribable.

When you pull the pan out, it is a pile of pure, blackened charcoal.

You are horrified. Malleus looks concerned. Grim looks betrayed.

"Are ya tryin’ to kill me, Henchhuman?!" Grim yells. "I thought we were friends!"

But Lilia? Lilia is nodding approvingly.

"Ah," he sighs, nostalgic. "Just like how I remember it."

…This man should not be allowed in kitchens.

But you, an absolute buffoon, take the charred remains of your so-called courtship offering and bring it to Floyd anyway.

You find him in the cafeteria, dump the plate in front of him, and sit down. Defeated.

Floyd stares. Pokes it with a finger.

And then, he looks at you.

With pity.

"Shrimpy." His voice is gentle. You feel a chill of fear. "You goin' through hard times or somethin'?"

…

You die inside.

Your cooking was so bad that Floyd Leech—FLOYD LEECH—was feeling sympathy for you.

You have never known such shame.

You sit there, staring into the distance like a soldier who’s seen too much. A philosopher pondering the futility of existence. A person who has scent-marked a sweater and written poetry at the behest of a fae prince who thinks you’re simply not dedicated enough to the craft of love.

You are contemplating life, death, and the many, many decisions that have led you here.

And then, Jade sits beside you.

You don’t even flinch. You should. You should be wary. You should immediately launch yourself into the bushes and prepare to be interrogated in some terrifying eel version of psychological warfare. But you don’t. Because you have nothing left.

So you just turn your head slowly, look at him with the dull, hollow eyes of someone who’s really going through it.

Jade looks positively delighted.

"My, my," he says, in that syrupy, knowing voice of his. "What could possibly put you in such a state?"

You inhale. Exhale. Consider your options. Death is looking really attractive.

"I don’t want to talk about it."

Jade hums, obviously entertained, but then—then—he decides to make it worse.

"You know," he muses, "even Floyd has started to get concerned."

You blink.

"…Huh?"

"Oh, yes," he says, resting his chin on his hand, enjoying every second of this. "Between the odd gifts, the unusual behavior, and your general aura of suffering, even he has begun to notice. Which means you are being particularly obvious, because he rarely pays attention to anything that isn't entertaining."

You don’t even have the energy to be embarrassed.

"What’s your point?" you mutter.

Jade smiles like a predator about to land a final, devastating strike.

"You should simply tell him. Because this…?" He gestures vaguely at your soul-deep despair. "This is rather pitiful."

You stare.

You process.

And, somewhere in the depths of your heart, you realize he’s right.

You are in shambles.

Like, properly, horrifically, soul-crushingly in shambles. You’ve been through so much. You've spent weeks engaging in increasingly deranged behavior at the behest of a well-meaning yet hopelessly out-of-touch fae prince. You've endured ritual poetry readings, scent-marking disasters, and a culinary war crime that left you emotionally and financially bankrupt.

And now, standing in front of Floyd Leech—the very cause of your descent into insanity—you finally snap.

"I LIKE YOU!" you blurt, voice cracking like a cheap mirror. "I LIKE YOU AND I'VE BEEN ACTING LIKE A LUNATIC BECAUSE MALLEUS SAID I HAD TO FOLLOW FAE COURTSHIP RITUALS AND I—" your voice hiccups, borderline hysterical, "—I THINK I LOST A PIECE OF MY SOUL WHEN I TRIED TO BAKE THAT DAMN CAKE BUT IT'S FINE, BECAUSE APPARENTLY THAT'S JUST WHAT LOVE IS??? AND I DID IT ALL FOR YOU, FLOYD, BECAUSE I AM A DUMB IDIOT WHO LIKES YOU FOR SOME REASON."

You gasp for air, because this has been a lot.

And Floyd?

Floyd is laughing.

Not just a chuckle, either. No, this menace of a man is bent over, hands on his knees, actually wheezing with mirth as if you’ve just performed the comedy routine of the century. His shoulders shake. His teeth glint in the light. He looks absolutely delighted.

And you? You just stand there, a broken, hollow shell of a human being.

"You should’ve just told me, Shrimpy~!" he cackles, wiping a tear from his eye. "I like you too, y’know?"

...

There’s a moment of silence as your poor, battered brain struggles to process this information.

"WHAT."

Floyd grins, like you haven’t just endured weeks of psychological torment at the hands of a dragon prince. "I mean, you’re fun! You make me laugh, and I like squeezin’ ya. ‘Course I like ya!"

Before you can even begin to formulate a response, he lunges forward and grabs you in a hug so tight that your ribs beg for mercy. You are crushed, consumed, engulfed in the sheer force of his affection. Your spine may never recover, but at this point, what’s another injury to your dignity?

And honestly? You don’t care.

Because he likes you.

Floyd likes you back.

Which means—you realize, tears pricking your eyes in relief—you never have to perform another insane fae courtship ritual again.

No more humiliating poetry. No more dubious scent-marking. No more playing Russian roulette with your digestive system in the name of romance. You did it. You won.

And then Floyd leans down, cups your face, and kisses you.

It's a little rough, a little overwhelming, but you melt into it anyway, because Sevens, you earned this.

Somewhere in the distance, Malleus Draconia watches from the shadows.

Arms crossed, nodding sagely, he looks upon his greatest success.

"My expert techniques," he murmurs, pride swelling in his voice, "have secured my child of man their eel."

Behind him, Lilia wipes an imaginary tear.

"Beautiful," he sighs.

Masterlist

[jxstsxgx]

𝙸 𝙰𝙼? | 𝚂𝚃𝙴𝚅𝙴 𝙷𝙰𝚁𝚁𝙸𝙽𝙶𝚃𝙾𝙽

Pairings: Drunk! Steve x Reader

Word Count: 2, 272 words

Summary: Steve drinks himself into a dramatic spiral over his unrequited love for his best friend, you. You’re absolutely no help. Mostly because you’re too busy laughing at his dramatic little love confession meltdown.

Contains: Hangover recovery, mentions of drunk behavior, soft teasing, reader absolutely clowning Steve for his antics, Steve being the most dramatic sap ever, sweet kisses and fluffy ending.

A/N: Honestly just wanted to write hungover Steve being confused and needy, lmao.

masterlist |

Steve Harrington was, by all accounts, tragically wasted.

He had his face half-buried into Robin’s hoodie, one shoe missing, and was currently narrating his heartbreak like a sad poet with too much lip gloss on his mouth.

“She doesn’t love me,” he mumbled.

Robin exhaled slowly. “You don’t know that.”

“Yes I do! She’s too perfect for me. Too sunshiney. Too good.” He sniffed loudly. “She needs a guy with a jawline and like... a motorcycle.”

Eddie sat cross legged across the room, lazily flipping through a magazine and sipping a beer. “You have a jawline.”

“Not a good one,” Steve said dramatically. “Not a jawline she’d marry.”

Robin leaned her head back against the couch and mouthed, I’m going to scream.

Steve, for his part, kept rambling. “She’s probably out right now. With that guy. You know, the one. The guy with the forearms.”

“Steve,” Robin said slowly. “She’s not seeing anyone else.”

“She better not be,” he said, very seriously. “Because I’d duel him. Like swords. Or nunchucks. Do people still do that?”

Eddie blinked. “Have you ever held a sword?”

“Metaphorically, yes.”

Robin sat forward. “Okay. Steve. Listen. She's-”

“I mean, we’re best friends, right? But like best best friends. Like, if we were in a movie, it’d be the part where I stare at her in the rain and whisper something dumb like, ‘It’s always been you,’ and she forgives me for being a total dumbass and then we make out.”

Eddie snorted. “Jesus Christ.”

Robin tried again. “Steve. Let me just say-”

“I can’t tell her, okay?” he shouted, as if someone had objected. “It would ruin everything. She’d laugh or... or worse. She’d pity me. And she deserves someone who’s, like, emotionally stable and... doesn’t cry at the end of The Neverending Story."

Eddie opened his mouth. “Dude, you’re-”

“I know!” Steve wailed. “I’m her idiot best friend. Her go to guy. The guy who shows up with fries and lets her rant about her stupid coworker and doesn’t kiss her even when he really, really wants to.”

Robin slapped her hands on her knees. “Steve. Shut up for two seconds-”

“She doesn’t need to know I’m in love with her. Okay? She’s got a good thing going. Probably dating some art history major who reads poetry in French. I’ll just stay out of it.”

Eddie looked at Robin.

Robin looked at Eddie.

Both of them looked at Steve.

Then they got up, dragged and forced him into Eddie’s van.

You opened your door in a tank top and pajama pants, rubbing sleep from your eyes. “Steve?”

He blinked at you like you were a hallucination. “You’re home.”

“Yeah? It’s midnight. What’s going on?”

Robin shoved him gently forward. “Go on, Romeo.”

Steve stumbled inside, dazed. You reached for his hand instinctively. He gripped it like a lifeline.

“I came to say,” he began, very seriously, “that I love you.”

You paused. “Okay…”

“I know you’re taken,” he sighed. “And that’s fine. You deserve that. You deserve flowers and matching playlists and forehead kisses.”

“Steve-”

“No, it’s okay. I just had to say it once. So I don’t die with it inside me.”

You blinked.

Behind him, Robin and Eddie silently waved at you. Robin gestured wildly to say something. Eddie mimed a heart and pointed between the two of you.

“Steve,” you said softly. “Look at me.”

He did, watery eyed and flushed.

“You’re my boyfriend, dummy.”

He blinked.

Then blinked again.

“…Oh,” he said.

You smiled. “Yeah.”

A beat.

“I am?” he asked, voice cracking with confusion and wonder.

“You’ve been my boyfriend for like, six months.”

He looked behind him slowly at Robin and Eddie, who both gave simultaneous we tried shrugs.

Steve turned back to you, face flushed red and stunned into silence.

"I am." He says, sheepishly and now giggling.

Steve woke up with the grace of a corpse dragged from the lake.

Groaning, he blinked into your ceiling, one arm flopped over his face, one leg shoved halfway off the bed, your pillow missing entirely from under his head.

“Kill me,” he rasped.

You were already up. In the kitchen, making coffee, humming something cheerful. Too cheerful.

He frowned into the sunlight slanting through your curtains.

Why were you humming?

You were never that happy before 10 a.m.

His stomach dropped.

You walked into the room holding a mug, your sleep shirt oversized and your smile borderline evil.

“Good morning, Romeo.”

Steve narrowed his eyes. “Why do you look like you’re up to something?”

You sat beside him on the edge of the bed, handed him the coffee like you hadn’t been waiting to destroy him with it.

“No reason. Just wanted to see how my boyfriend’s head was doing.”

Steve winced, sipping carefully. “Feels like there’s a demon in it. One with a tiny drum set.”

You patted his hair. “Well, at least you weren’t dramatic or anything.”

“Don’t mess with me right now. My brain is literal soup.”

You shrugged. “Sure. I mean, Robin and Eddie dragged you to me like you were Frodo with the One Ring. And you did tell me you’d duel my imaginary boyfriend with nunchucks.”

Steve slowly turned to look at you, mortified. “...What.”

“Oh, and when they left, you cried. A little. About how I needed a man with a motorcycle.”

His face hit the pillow. “No.”

“And about your jawline.”

Steve groaned into the sheets. “Stop. Please. I’m too fragile.”

“I wish I recorded it,” you said, sighing. “Steve Harrington, prince of hair, heartbreaker of Hawkins sobbed because he thought he was ‘just the fries guy.’”

He peeked out from the blanket. “You’re enjoying this too much.”

“I earned this,” you said smugly. “Six months of going on dates, flirting, romantic drives, and homemade cookies, and my boyfriend forgot we were dating.”

“I was drunk!”

“You thought I had another boyfriend!”

“You said someone at work had nice forearms!”

“I was talking about a golden retriever named Max!”

Steve slumped, face pressed into your thigh. “I hate myself.”

You giggled, running your fingers through his hair. “It was kind of cute. You were very sincere. You said I deserved forehead kisses and little dates.”

He groaned again.

“And then you called me your sunshine girl and threatened to write a mixtape about your pain.”

“Okay,” Steve said, sitting up and wincing dramatically. “That’s enough. I’m cutting you off.”

You grinned, leaning in until your forehead touched his. “You’re lucky I love you.”

Steve huffed, cheeks pink. “Yeah. Lucky is one word for it.”

You kissed his cheek. Then the tip of his nose. Then his lips, soft and smiling.

And even with a hangover from hell, Steve smiled back.

“…Wait. Did I really say I’d use nunchucks?”

“Yup.”

“I don’t even own nunchucks…I take it back. I regret nothing.”

You laughed so hard, you nearly dropped your mug.

[jinmindeulle]

svt as your baby daddies | maknae line (pt. 2)

you are back from your work trip!

°⨳°·..·°⨳°⊹٭ seokmin ٭⊹°⨳°·..·°⨳° (part 1 here)

When your boss told you that you had efficiently finished your work earlier, and that she was even going to pay the fee so you could get on your flight a day in advance, you almost hugged her. 

You had decided not to tell your husband so you could surprise your family.

As it was pretty early in the morning when you got back to Seoul, you resolved to get breakfast as well. A few blocks from your home, there was this bakery your daughter absolutely loved, so you got some sweet treats for your favorite people in the whole world.

An instant after opening the door, your mouth fell open. The mess of toys around the living room was a sight you have never had the pleasure of seeing. You knew your daughter to be pretty active when it came to her playing activities, but this was something different — it seemed like Seokmin had decided to put all of her toys in one place so she could easily grab them without whining for one of them. Honestly… you couldn’t blame him.

Trying to dodge as many objects as possible, especially those evil looking legos, you made your way towards the kitchen and prepared the table so breakfast looked homey and delicious. Needing a quick shower before anything else, you walked upstairs to your room, which was suspiciously empty, bed done and all. You shrugged, knowing your husband better than anyone else, he would be in one place and one place only.

Fresh out of the shower, you headed to Kimmy’s bedroom. And what you saw almost made you tear up.

Seokmin was a big man for that tiny crib, but yet he still had managed to pull the barrier down and sleep the night with his toddler clung to his arm, half of his body pretty much touching the floor.

Kimmy was the first one to move, and when you got closer and was able to see you, she sleepily sat up and made grabby hands at you, her pacifier still attached to her mouth.

“Hello my baby girl” you cooed at her, taking her from the crib and smelling her baby scent. “Oh, I missed you” you hugged her softly, and she placed her head on your shoulder.

The movement had finally woken your husband up, and the moment he saw you standing by his side, he almost fell to the floor. “What?!” he yelled, too loud for your liking.

“Surprise!” you giggled, feeling small as he engulfed you in a tight family hug.

“I was going mad without you” Seok kissed your forehead and you returned it, on his lips. “Please keep surprising me like this”

“I’ll work hard” you smiled, finally feeling complete.

¸.·✩·.¸¸.·¯⍣✩ mingyu ✩⍣¯·.¸¸.·✩·.¸ (part 1 here)

You parked your car on your driveway not expecting your family to be back home. You knew that Mingyu was busy shooting for Calvin Klein, and he had dropped Minha off with his sister. He usually took quite some time with those schedules, so when you saw him standing on the porch with your daughter in his arms, your eyes lit up.

“My babies!” you jumped out of the car seat, running to your family and hugging them with all the love you had been saving for them.

“Momma's back baby!” your husband kissed her cheek and after looking at you like you were the most precious woman in the world, he leaned in to kiss your lips.

“Yuck daddy!” Minha took both of your chins with her small hands and pushed you away from each other.

“But I missed mommy!” Mingyu pouted “I can kiss her because she is my wife”

“But she is my mommy!”

“Okay you two, there’s mommy for everyone” you giggled, taking your daughter from Mingyu’s arms and peppering her chubby cheeks with kisses “Did you have fun with auntie?”

“Yeah! She bought me a new Barbie doll!” and with that, she wiggled herself out of your hold to run inside and get her new acquisition. 

“Finally” Mingyu sighed, and with the biggest dorky smile, took you by the waist and kissed you properly. “Just like when we were dating” he murmured against your lips.

“We kiss like that all the time, dummy” you chuckled, embracing him back and caressing his lower back with your fingernails. 

“Not when missy is around” he pouted, taking a strand of hair out of your face. “She’s a jealous fellow”

You knew your daughter to be very protective of the relationship she had with your husband on the one hand, and with you on the other. She liked you being together, but when the attention was not on her, things got complicated.

“When should we tell Minnnie?” you looked up at him, and he instinctively placed a hand on your tummy. “It’s about to start showing”

Before answering anything else, Mingyu made sure your daughter was still out of sight and kneeled down to say hi to his unborn baby “Hi my angel, it’s daddy. Hope you treated mommy well these days” after kissing your belly over the fabric of your dress, he stood back up and brought you back to his hold. “Maybe next week? We could get her something and tell her that her new brother or sister sent it”

“You’re a smartass” 

“Apart from handsome, may I add”

Minhee crossed the door frame with a bunch of Barbie dolls and started playing with them in the front yard, totally ignoring her lovebird parents — another sign of how annoyed she was at not being the center of attention.   

“Missy’s haircut looks better now”

“See?” Gyu leaned back down and kissed your nose. “You were being too picky!”

“You took her to another hair salon, didn’t you?” When he let you go and headed towards your car to get your suitcase out, you had to laugh. “Don’t run away from me Kim Mingyu! I know you better than myself!”

¸„٭⊹✡•~⍣°”ˆ˜¨ minghao ¨˜ˆ”°⍣~•✡⊹٭„¸ (part 1 here)

You tried your best to look as airportfashionable as possible because you knew that Minghao always checked you out — and this time you wanted to earn the compliment. He could be too good to you sometimes. 

It was nothing out of your style though, but you made a little effort to choose the best one that could still be comfortable for an eight hour long flight.

As tired as you were, seeing your family waiting for you hand in hand gave you back the energy to run to them and hug them tightly. 

“Mommy!” Lian jumped up and down, embracing your legs and looking up to you. You failed to see the heart eyes she was giving you as you kissed your husband’s cheek. “I made you a drawing!” 

As soon as you kneeled down to her height, she proudly showed it to you. It was a crayon drawing of your little family — she was in between you and Hao, hand in hand, and on the sky there was a big rainbow with “My family” written in three languages — Mandarin, Korean and English. 

“That’s an incredible drawing, baby” you squished her cheeks and after kissing her forehead, you hugged her with all your might.

“Oh? Babe please stand up” you heard Hao tapping your shoulder. 

“Yessir” rapidly understanding why he had asked you to do that, you stood back up and twirled. “You like it?”

“And you tell me you don’t know how to dress yourself up?” he took you from the waist and shook his head, giving you a soft smile “You are too mean to you sometimes, love”

“I’m sorry but you outdo my efforts every time! I have to try a little harder to impress you” you shrugged, taking his cheeks with your hands and pecking his lips.  

“Let’s go home, huh?” Minghao giggled, taking your hand and grabbing your bag with the other. “Liannie, take mommy’s hand, it’s too crowded”

Your obedient daughter followed her father’s instructions, and you watched with delight as she skipped and sang with happiness. “Did you choose your outfit today?” you asked her, admiring her summer flowery dress matched with the flower laces on her hair. 

“I did, but daddy helped me with the hair!” 

“The hair too?” you opened your eyes to show your surprise, and when your husband’s cheeks tinted a soft shade of pink, you had to give a fake disappointed sigh “I leave for two days and my husband replaces me so easily”

“Don’t you dare!” he let go of the hold on your hand and tickled you on the side “No one replaces my wifey.”

٭⊹¤.•⨳•.☆✬ seungkwan ✬☆.•⨳•.¤⊹٭ (part 1 here)

Your home was unbelievably quiet for a Friday night. You knew Taehun liked to sleep early, so you assumed Seungkwan had joined him — by how hard single parenting had been for him, you couldn’t blame him for falling asleep as soon as his child did. 

You left your bags before tiptoeing your way into Taehun’s room, but you didn’t even have to reach the door when you heard father and son discussing very important business. 

“... to shower everyday?” your son’s voice was heard, a curious cutesy tone.

“Because,” your husband started “you don’t want to be smelly when you play with your friends”

“Or when mama arrives” 

Kwan let out a sigh and you had to hold your laugh. Taehun was really talking about you every second of the waking day.

“Mhm. She would be very upset if you hugged her all dirty”

“Would you be upset if I hugged you all dirty?”

“Of course I would. We are a clean family, Taehun-ah” 

“Will I ever have a brother?” The randomness of the questions were adorable and concerning at the same time, but coming from a Boo, it was nothing that could surprise you.

He had asked a couple of times before, especially after your sister had her second child, but you had tried to brush it off. Your and Seungkwan’s schedules were hard to deal with already on their own, and after Tae arrived to the world you had been juggling with work, family, and husband-wife time. However, you had never discussed it with Kwan, so before you interrupted their little moment, you had to hear his answer. 

“You know how hard it is for mama and I to be with you all the time, mhm?” he explained with that father tone you loved “Another baby is a biiiig responsibility. We have to find more time to care for him or her”

“But papa, I can help!” you had to put your hand on your mouth to silence your enamoured gasp. That kid was all you had ever wished for. 

“I know, baby” Kwan laughed, “If it were up to me, I would have ten kids with mommy”

“That’s a lot,” Taehun whined, not really liking the answer. “But mama is the best mommy.”

“I’m sorry, who’s the best?” you couldn’t handle it anymore, so as soon as you came in, two pairs of arms engulfed you in the most awaited hug.

“Mommy!”

“Hi honey” Seungkwan had a shine in his eyes that you had so much missed. Before taking Tae from the floor, he gave you a kiss and whispered his ultimate favorite words to tell you. “The love of my life”

The way he always had heart eyes for you melted your heart. “I love you” you answered, and turned to your son “Did you shower, little bean?”

“I smell fresh and clean just for you, mama!”

·.★·.·´¯·.·★ hansol ★·.·´¯·.·★.· (part 1 here)

Hansol had texted you the day before that he would be busy recording some content with the guys, and your father, the only other person who could have picked you up, was on holiday — so you had to go back home on your own. You quickly decided to head to the taxi area, too tired to wait for the bus. 

When you stepped out, a cold breeze hit you, and you hugged yourself to wait in the line of people. You were too concentrated on watching the taxis come and go, timing them so you could calculate how much you’d have to wait, that you didn’t notice when a man stood up from a nearby bench and positioned himself next to you, hiding his face behind a flower bouquet. 

You glared at him when you finally saw him, and not only after having lowered the flower arrangement down to his nose, did you realise who that was.

“What the hell” you chuckled, taking the bouquet from his hands and eagerly accepting the hug he engulfed you in.

“Welcome back honey” he giggled, picking you up from the floor in the process.

“Why did you lie?” you asked, and as soon as he released you from his tight grip you faced him. Oh, how much you had missed your husband’s face.

“Because,” he started, taking a strand of hair out of your face. “It’s been a while since I last gave you a surprise. Or bought you flowers”

“Is this because I finally gave in and bought you that keychain?” you raised an eyebrow. 

“It might” he teased, and after pressing a shy kiss to your lips, he sighed “Nah. It’s because I love you”

“Oh wow, I may have to leave you guys more often. You were calling me boring two days ago and now I get all this praise” your mouth curved into a smile. 

“I want to make sure you get the complete Hansol package” he nodded, taking your hand and your suitcase with the other, leading you back to the parking lot. “And Myeon is on a school trip to the museum, so I still have a few hours to provide you with the real full package” he wiggled his eyebrows. 

“I like the sound of that” you giggled, “You do deserve that keychain”

“Getting you as my gift is enough”

“Oh my God, my husband, the Last Romantic”

“Don’t forget that when I call you boring and send you even more boring selfies”

`✵•.¸,✵°✵.｡.✰ chan ✰.｡.✵°✵,¸.•✵´ (part 1 here)

Chan was a fast man, but that night he was three times faster than usual. You weren’t even able to pass the last security check when you noticed a man waving both of his hands to your direction, then picking up your son and having him wave at you as well. 

“You have a beautiful family, dear” the old woman that was waiting in line in front of you gave you a polite smile, and you gave her a small bow.

“Thank you ma’am, I really do” you smiled, feeling the anticipation of having both of your boys back in your arms after three days.

“Look! That’s eomma right there!” After getting all your stuff screened, you picked it from the moving platform and headed their way.

“Hello my beautiful boys!” you took Seojoon from your husband's arms and kissed his cheeks, your favorite activity as his mama. “How’s my little baby?”

“Eomma” and just like that, he started crying, clinging to you like a baby koala.

“I would cry too if I wasn’t a grown man” your husband shrugged, joining the hug and kissing your forehead multiple times. “How’s my baby?”

“Tired” you admitted, “but extremely happy to see you both”

“Let’s get you home then, we can order dinner and cuddle the rest of the night” Chan nodded, reassuring you. You smiled and tiptoed just a little to peck his lips.

“Thank you, appa”

Before finally getting started with your trip back home, your little personal koala had a hard time letting you go. “Baby, you need to sit in your chair.” you caressed the back of his head, looking at Chan with a desperate expression.

“Joonie, will you be okay if mommy sits next to you?”

“No!” he whined, hiding his face on your neck, avoiding his father’s gaze.

“Lovie” you sighed “It’s just a short ride. As soon as we get home, you will cuddle eomma and appa as much as you want”

“No! I want eomma now!”

“Okay” Chan moved to open the passenger seat’s door and took the one and only item that could make your son hesitate a little from the glove compartment. “Do you want your banana milk?”

The magic words worked with ease — he lifted his head and looked at his father like he held the universe in his hands. When he nodded, you quickly followed the plan. “If you let go of mommy and you sit in your chair, then you can have it” his slight nod was answer enough for you to hurry and proceed with solving the issue. 

“He really is the banana milk guy”

And as much as you hated that nickname, that night you couldn’t help but agree with your husband. You were raising a banana milk enthusiast.

hyung line here!

¸.·✩·.¸¸.·¯⍣✩ seventeen masterlist ✩⍣¯·.¸¸.·✩·.¸

[coldilikeit]

Yandere Batfam x Camp half-blood (Neglected reader)

DC x Pjo

Part 13

______________________________

"We have to get off this ship" Annabeth whispers "the amount of monsters here aren't normal, something is going on" she says

You were about to agree then a loud clang was heard, you four quickly hid

Looking at the window you see straw dummies with orange camp half-blood shirts, a Dracaenae (dragon women) rips the dummies and the other monsters cheer

"—Don't push me Agrius!" You feel both Annabeth and Percy stiffen as the sudden voice seeps into your ears

"Luke..." Percy shudders, This Luke guy and his friend were arguing, something about gambling, wait no- that's a metaphor for taking a risk

"it will pay off!" Luke yells "They'll take the bait... Now let's check in the casket"

Tyson whimpered "Leave now?"

Silence...

"please..." He muttered after

The remaining three of you came to an agreement, Percy looked eager and Annabeth looked worried

You sigh "We can't, if this guy is talking about something that relates to camp or something worse, we have to find out"

And if possible beat the shit out of him and drag him back to camp to explain

Annabeth volunteered to go alone, saying she had a camp that turned her invisible so it'd be fine, it was met with both you and Percy objecting and saying everyone will go or no one will

"I vote no one goes! Pretty please?" Tyson pleaded, and it ended with three kids crawling and walking like spies with a big cyclops nervously chewing his fingernails trotting behind

Someone opens the door for Luke and the monster, not another monster... A demigod!

"that's Chris Rodriguez! From the Hermes cabin!?" You exclaim and then you clasp your hands to your mouth after realizing you were too loud

Annabeth looked heartbroken "there are more traitors...?"

______________________________

A certain king of Atlantis is sat across Bruce, the looming presence between the two, but there is a sense of respect shared

"As a father myself I feel like you should know something" Aquaman sighs

The blonde haired king reminisces the feeling of losing a child, his baby was abducted by someone he trusted and he got his little boy back at the end, it was a dreadful feeling

The feeling that no matter how many good you'll do next, the person you wanted it to be for won't be here to benefit, "Diana was mistaken, Your child was spotted by one of my merguards on the sea, they're alive and I thought you should know-"

"Where?! Where is my kid right now?" Bruce had jumped from the table to shake Aquaman's shoulders

"they are at sea on a ship... And I'm afraid they might be in danger, as the ship is heading for the sea of monsters- or what you humans call the Bermuda triangle, and I can't stop it-"

"Why not!? Aren't you the king of the ocean!??"

"Calm down, I am the king of Atlantis, not the sea nor the ocean, do not mistake me for my emperor, Lord Poseidon"

Bruce takes a deep breath, "Why is my baby there?, how can I get them?"

"I believe your child is on a quest, a quest given by the gods, mortals cannot interfere, you only have to wait for it to be over, there is also a chance they may not get out of the quest alive, Bruce... Don't try anything" Aquaman tries to warn

"I'm not letting my child stay in a place called the sea of monsters, I'll find them" he says

The king looks at him with sadness "Unfortunately you cannot find the sea of monsters, it finds you, it doesn't matter if you search the whole ocean, if the sea does not want you finding it, you won't, you are gonna have to trust your child that they have the means to survive this"

Silence took over, then a gentle heartbroken voice appeared "you just told me my baby is alive, and if they die again, I don't know how I'll pull through this time"

"I'm so sorry Bruce, I'll take my leave"

______________________________

"We are SO gonna die here" you whisper in Percy's ear

Annabeth shifts as to the four of you tiptoe into the Captain's door, that's when you hear them, muffled sounds, you push your ear through the door

Luke talking about a casket and a golden fleece, the fleece you guys are looking for! What will Luke use it on?

"I can't hear anything!" Percy frustratingly says, Tyson pushes his ear through the door and speaks, he speaks in Luke's voice

"—the prophecies ourselves, those fools won't know which way to turn" Tyson says

He copied Luke's voice... You forgot cyclops can do that, how... Creepy.

Nevermind the visible uncomfortable tension that Tyson veiled on the you, Percy and for some reason especially Annabeth, Tyson continues to mimic voice, this time a deeper gruffer voice "you really think the old horseman is gone for good?"

You gasp, they are talking about Chiron, then Tyson laughed, it was Luke's laugh "They can't trust him anymore, not with the skeletons in his closet, the poisoning of Thalia's tree was the last straw"

Annabeth shivered, then she yelled "Tyson stop! That's creepy!", Tyson shrunk "I was just listening"

"keep listening" Percy says

Tyson closed his eyes again "—Quiet! I heard something, just outside the door" and before I could tell everyone to hide

Luke opened the door and saw us

A cyclops, a child of Aphrodite, Athena and Poseidon

"Percy! Anne! Long time no see... Who are these two?" Luke gestures to me and Tyson

Fuck.

______________________________

Bruce: I hope my baby is strong enough to complete their quest so we can reunite

(Name): I am so going to die here

@yunloyal @sirenetheblogger @00hellohello00 @spqce-bun @casspen-starlight @eyeless-kun @ghostdoodlen @ratchetprime211 @delias-stuff @sadslasher13 @ellaprime7 @wpdarlingpan @mountvesuvu @chinxinsomnia @nathaly36 @vanessa-boo @bat1212 @ceramic-raven @sweetconnoisseurgardener @dhanyasri @bella-wolf100 @shortnsweetsposts @roseapov @d3sperate-enuf @d3kstar @sheep-from-rad

[cameronspecial]

Helping rafe to use a fleshlight🫦

Helping Hand

Pairing: Rafe Cameron x Reader

Warnings: SMUT and Sex Toys

Pronouns: She/Her

Word Count: 1.0K

A/N: I did research for this and an info video for a fleshlight had me giggling. Like, tell me why it has erectile dysfunction aid.

Masterlist

Rafe wasn’t a prude. He liked to fuck just as much as the next guy; however, before Y/N, he had never used sex toys. His arrogance made him think that only guys who couldn’t get it up would use them. 

She, on the other hand, loves the tools that can help heighten the pleasure for both of them. So she has been working toward getting him to bring the toys into their sex lives. It began with having him watch her use a vibrator. She used it to stimulate her clit, but when it came to penetration, Rafe stopped her and brought her to her release himself. The next step was being able to use a dildo to penetrate herself. It took everything in him not to take it out of her and throw it out the window. As she used the imitation dick, he got turned on by the sight. Maybe, letting her use the toys wasn’t so bad. 

Rafe’s upcoming business trip has her scanning an adult toy website she can use while she is away. Her eyes land on a particular object and it catches her interest. This could be the perfect next step in her plan. 

———

The night before his trip, he is folding clothes to pack. She tip-toes into the room in her purple silk nightgown that he leaves and her hands are behind her back. Déjà vu comes over him. He is familiar with this view. He rests the pants in the suitcase with a sigh, “What am I going to watch you fuck now? Is it one of those full dummy things? Please tell me it’s not that, they freak me out.” She giggles with a shake of her head. Her hair falls over her shoulders as she does. “Nope. Actually… it’s something for you,” she confesses, raising her hands to reveal the toy. His eyes narrow at the object. 

It’s a black cone-shaped object. One end is rounded and the other is flatter with a bump as well as a red scoop-shaped thing attached to it. “What is that?” he questions. She steps forward with a bashful smile, spinning it around so he can clearly see the end with the scoop. “This is a fleshlight. One of the best on the market, Baby.” She hands it over to him so he can inspect it. He identifies the bump as an imposter labia and clit. In between, folds is a hole and looking inside of it shows tiny bumps. He moves on to the red scoop, which also has the same bumpy surface as the inside. “It’s a fleshlight,” she says, wrapping her arms around his neck to place a kiss on his lips to butter him up. His eyes widen and he throws it onto the bed. “No, no way. I’m not using that.” She pouts and plays at the hair at the base of his neck. “Aww, come on. I bought it just for you, with my own money. Are you telling me you aren’t going to use my gift to you, Baby?” she whines. She looks up at him through her eyelashes and bats them in the way she knows gets him to do anything for her. 

His bottom lip nestles between his teeth and he surrenders. “Fine. I’ll try it out.” She jumps up with small claps of her hand, “Yay! I promise you’ll love it. It will make phone sex so much better.” He doesn’t say anything and just strips down. He settles onto the bed with his back against the headboard. His head tilts to the corner of the bed across from him and she hops on. She rests her feet under her bum, spreading her legs so he can see her pantie-less pussy. “I wanna watch you use it.” 

He obeys. His hand grabs the toy and he spits into his hand to help with the friction. After he rubs the saliva over his shaft, he replaces his hand with the toy. The silicone feels strange against him, unlike the warmth and wetness he is used to. It doesn’t feel pleasant, yet it doesn’t feel amazing either. He pumps himself a few times while staring right at her. He quickly gives up and throws the toy to the side. “There I tried it and I don’t like it. So, can you come here to take care of this,” he whines. She plays along, crawling over to him and throwing her legs over his hips. When he reaches down to line himself up, she leans over to his bedside table and pulls something out. She straightens up and shows him the bottle of lube and a remote control. “That’s because I was hiding one final piece of the puzzle.” She pours the liquid on his length, cupping it to spread it all over. Then, she guides the fleshlight onto him. He moans at the re-entry. She reaches between them and places his balls onto the red silicone.

She shifts so she is straddling one of his thighs and presses a button on the remote. It begins to vibrate. The intensity near his balls and tip has him thrusting slowly upward. She smirks at the motion. This is working. His eyes flick to her vagina and she begins to ride his thigh. Her moans add to his enjoyment and he doesn’t bother to hide his anymore. His hips speed up, causing her to giggle. “If you think this is good, wait until you feel what happens when I press this button,” she teases. Her finger hovers over it before applying pressure. The trinket works on its own to suck him into its grasp and the bristles brush against him. “Oh,” he lets out, grabbing onto her waist to give him something to do. She lets him help her move, “See, you like this.” 

The muscles in the Adonis belt spasm and she knows what that means. She presses the button three more times, speeding up the pace of the toy. His thumb falls to her bud and he circles it at the same speed. She collapses onto him with her forehead against his shoulder as they are both brought over the edge. They both pant in silence while they come down from their highs. She leans back to look at him with a grin, “So, what do you think?” 

“I think that maybe it doesn’t hurt to have a helping hand.”

Taglist: @loves0phelia @thelomlisrafecameron @wickedlovely121 @thepatriarchykeychain @drewsmusee @starkowswife @maybankslover @forstarkey @loving-and-dreaming @magicalyoura @rubixgsworld

[illyrianbitch]

Worth It

Pairing: Reader x Bat Boys

Summary: It can be hard to remember why you’ve put up with your best friends for centuries-- until they remind you why they're worth it.

Warnings: irritation cause of males? perhaps? friendship fluff. boys being boys aka bat boys are immature male dummies and reader is fed up.

Word Count: 3.4k

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹ 

“Are you guys idiots?”

Your voice was a loud bellow as you made your way into Rhysand’s office. From the look on your face, the three males quickly realized that their dirty little secret had been exposed– something that they were all expecting, Azriel being the first to mention that they hadn’t done a great job at hiding it. 

Sure, it was a silly idea for them to keep an ancient cursed object. Rhysand didn’t think it was real, when Cassian came running home and claiming he won it in a bet. The person seemed awfully enthusiastic to get rid of it, Cass had said, told me that it would change my life forever. Weird guy. It only took one interaction for Azriel’s shadows to instantly skitter from the small gold thing, whispering into Azriel’s ears like scared children. Cursed, old, evil, run. 

Rhysand was going to tell you that they kept it, to get a better idea of it, that's all, and that it just so happened to be sitting on the table near your room. He was. At least, he planned on it.

It was Cassian who made the first move, leaning to the side and lowering his head slightly to Rhysand. “This feels like a trick question,” he attempted to whisper, but the sound was loud enough to carry through the room.

You ignored him, instead glaring at the violet eyes that held your gaze. 

“You didn’t think to tell me about something this dangerous?”

“I just thought-”

“Thought what?” You asked him, mouth agape, “That you’d just lie to me about living with a deadly object?”

“We didn’t lie, we just didn’t tell you,” Cassian clarified innocently. He regretted his input once your stare met his and he quickly muttered out a small apology, looking to become as small as he could make his large form to be. 

“And thats better?”

Rhysand let out a deep breath. 

“Y/n, just calm down.”

Your head snapped to face him at a force that made him question how you hadn’t broken it. Rhysand’s eyes widened as they met yours, a sense of rage now flickering in your gaze. Azriel instantly grimaced at the words of his brother, his gaze meeting Cassian’s, whose eyes were wide as his mouth formed a small “oh.” Both males took a cautionary step backwards.

“Calm down?” you repeated, slowly stalking towards Rhysand with an icy calmness that made him instantly shrink.

“Well,” he started putting one palm out towards you, “I just mean that we should sit down and think rationally about this.”

“Think rationally?”

Rhysand looked over his shoulders in an attempt to seek some backup, but Cassian averted his gaze and Azriel simply shook his head. You’ve done it now, was what Azriel’s gaze seemed to say. His shadows curled around him, slithering up his body until they were peeking over his shoulders, alert and ready to watch— in amusement, it would seem.

Rhys nervously laughed.

“Can we start over?”

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹ 

Compared to the others, your bedroom was extremely large, adorned with its own fireplace and seating area. But with the three Illyrian males standing around you, it felt quite cramped. You watched as they wandered around your room, picking up your stuff and throwing it to each other. This was your fault, of course, since you’d specifically asked for them to come. 

“Guys,” you said, “can we focus, please.”

The three males turned around to face you, all looking at you with wide stares and raised brows, as if they had been caught doing something they weren't supposed to be doing. 

“Right,” Rhysand said as he balanced a small porcelain heart in his hand, a Solstice gift from Mor. He quickly glanced down at the object, eyes widening slightly before he turned his head and threw it in the air, effectively tossing it off to Cassian, who caught it with parted lips. 

“Dude.” 

You groaned, rolling your eyes as you walked forward.“Give me that,” you said as you ripped the item out of the males large, calloused hands. 

“I need one of you to help me make Landon jealous.” 

“Not it,” Rhys said, the words quickly tumbling out of his mouth as his hands flew up in surrender.

You stared at him blankly, your lips forming into a tight line.

“What?”

The line quickly turned into a scowl as you held his stare, a look of innocence on his beautiful features. 

“Am I truly that hideous you don’t want to help me out?”

“Oh, please,” Rhysand said with a dramatic scoff, “You know you’re hot. We know you’re hot. But It’s not my fault you can’t flirt normally. This is a perfect night for me to get some, so, I can’t.”

You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms carefully, the porcelain heart safely in your grasp.

“Were the two guys from last night not enough?”

Instantly, a smug grin found its way onto Rhysand’s face. 

“Oh, c’mon,” he said, his voice low and sultry. A sense of pride clung to him. “I’m a growing male, I have a healthy appetite.”

From beside him, Cassian nodded with a grin, putting his knuckles out for Rhys to give him a fist bump. Azriel simply let out a small laugh and shook his head, eyes trained on you as you grimaced, your nose crinkled with a frown.

“You make it sound like you're eating them.”

Somehow, the grin grew, his pearly white teeth gleaming at you.

“Aren’t I?”

“You’re gross,” you responded, “I don’t want your help anyways.”

Rhysand let his mouth fall open in feign offense and you seized the moment to flip him off– a vulgar gesture that he instantly returned. Azriel and Cassian exchanged a glance.

“I got you, Y/n,” Cass finally said, walking up to you to wrap his arm around your shoulder. He pulled you into his embrace, looking down at you with a large, wolfish grin. You held his eyes for a moment, thinking about how well Cassian fit into your plans. A subtle sense of doubt crept into you, and once Cassian wiggled his eyebrows, you were done for. Your eyes instantly flickered to the last of your best friends.

“Az?”  Your voice was a soft plea, accompanied by a small, unsure smile that had Azriel sigh in defeat.

Cassian scoffed, pulling apart from you in an effort to see your entire face. “What? Why him?”

You gave a sheepish smile, your gaze bouncing between the three males before settling on him once more. “I love you, Cassian, but you won’t make him jealous.”

“And why not?”

It was Azriel who responded with a small snicker, “Because you’re easy.” 

Cassian’s mouth was open in shock as he registered the statement, his eyelids falling in soft blinks before he let out another scoff. 

“Well now I’m offended.”

“Don’t be,” Rhys said from across the room as he fell down on your couch, propping up his legs on the arms of it. “It means you’ve got a good game. Think about how many people you’ve fucked thats gotten you such a title. I mean the amount of puss-”

You let out a loud groan, pushing Cassian off you with a soft shove.

“Oh my Gods, we get it. You guys are slutty. Can we get back to me now? Please?” 

Your words were only met with a round of laughter. 

“And get your dirty shoes off my couch, Rhys.”

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹ 

“What the fuck happened to my cake?” You seethed, the words coming out bitter and sharp. The door slammed behind you as it collided with the wall, the impact of your entrance causing a dent in the surface. 

The boys visibly recoiled, Cassian flinching at the roughness of your voice, a voice that was usually comforting and soft. The three males exchanged wary glances, and then Rhysand was lifting his chin.

“I-” he started, only to be interrupted by a cough from Cassian, “We don’t know what you’re talking about,”

“My powdered sugar pound cake, Rhysand. I know you guys did something. Where is it? Did you eat it? Destroy it?”

Another beat of silence. You were sure your teeth were bound to break with the force of your clenched jaw, your teeth gritting harder with every minute spent looking at their avoiding eyes. 

“We didn’t touch your cake, Y/n.” 

You glared at Rhys, the apparent dedicated spokesmen of the three, and let out a harsh exhale. 

“There is powdered sugar on your hands!” You said, shoving an accusatory finger at them. "Right now!”

The males all simultaneously looked down at their hands, Cassian gasping in feign surprise– a sound so exaggerated you resisted the urge to hit him on the side of the head for the act alone. Rhysand was a bit more subtle, bringing his hands up to his face, examining them, and then tossing a casual shrug your way.

“This is completely unrelated powdered sugar.”

With a flare of your nostrils, you turned your head to face Azriel, who met your gaze with a small smirk on his face, of all things.

“And what's your excuse, Az?”

He shook his head. “Don’t have one.”

“So you admit you guys ate it?”

“I didn’t admit anything.”

You clenched your hands into fists, your fingernails digging into the skin of your palms. 

“Yes you did.”

Azriel’s eyebrow quirked, and then he was narrowing his eyes at you.

“Did I?”

“Yeah, Y/n, did he?” Cassian echoed, putting his hands on his hips.

Your nostrils flared as your gaze bounced between the three males. You wanted to take all three of their heads and knock them together, hope that one of them would produce a module of maturity. 

They braced themselves for an outburst, for you to run up to one of them and hit them in the face, if anything, but nothing came. Instead you looked away and shook your head. 

“Fuck you, guys. You suck. Gods.”

And you left. 

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹ 

You came to a halt as you turned the corner, now staring into the living room where your best friends stood shirtless next to one another, a determined look on their faces.

"What the hell are you guys doing?"

Rhys looked up with a grin. "We're settling a debate," he said, gesturing to the tape measure in his grip. "Gonna find out who's got the biggest wingspan."

You raised an eyebrow, bringing your finger up to your lips as you laughed.

"Want to place a bet?" Azriel said as he rolled his back, a small smirk on his lips.

Cassian flexed his wings behind him, a mischievous glint in his eyes as he shook loose pieces of hair out of his face. "I'm pretty sure it's me," he boasted.

Rhys shook his head, his wings unfolding slightly as he stood up taller. "Not a chance," he countered. "I think you'll find mine's larger."

"What does wingspan really determine?" You asked incredulously.

You watched as all three males blinked, staring at you as if you had spoken in a tongue different than your own.

"Uh," Cass said, lifting a finger, "Absolutely everything, my dear, Y/n."

You rolled your eyes at him, but began walking to them in spite of yourself. When you found yourself in front of Rhysand, you looked up and put your palm out.

Rhys frowned, eyebrows furrowing at the outstretched hand.

"Well?" You said, raising your eyebrows. "For a proper assessment, you need a fair judge."

He grinned, enthusiastically shoving the tape measure into your palm.

"Alright boys," Rhys said, turning around to face his brothers, stretching his hands out as his wings extended behind him-- almost hitting you in the face. "Let's settle this."

One by one, your friends approached you, Rhysand with a grin, Azriel with a smirk, shadows pointed at the edge of his wings, and Cassian with a cheeky wink.

After all three had been measured, you stepped back, trying to hide your grin. "Looks like we have a winner."

Cassian puffed out his chest triumphantly. "I knew it!"

You raised an eyebrow. "Actually, Azriel's wingspan is slightly larger."

Cassian's face fell as Az let out a loud laugh in victory, shadows surrounding Cass like a mocking audience. He swatted them away with his hands.

Rhys chuckled, clapping Cassian on the back. "Looks like you'll have to concede this one, Cass. Being last place isn't so bad."

Cassian frowned. "Azriel cheated! His shadows held his wings up, I swear."

A snicker in response.

"Yeah, yeah, you're a sore loser."

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹ 

"Why do you look like that?"

You gasped in surprise, your hand flying to your heart as you turned to the source of the voice. Cassian stood in your doorway, casually leaning against the doorframe as he bit into an apple.

"Cassian!" You scolded, pushing your hair off your shoulder as you walked towards him. "You can't just come into my room and scare me like that!"

"Why not?" He said, mouth filled to brim with chewed apple bits.

You stared at his mouth with a frown, lifting your hand so that your nail could slightly scrape off a piece stuck to the stubble on his chin. Cassian gave you a smile as he finished chewing, wiping off his mouth with his free hand.

"Gross," you muttered. You shook off your hand before looking at him again, "And you just can't."

"Well I'm here, so, seems like I can."

You rolled your eyes, but Cass only smiled at the reaction.

"So why are you dressed like that?"

You frowned. "Like what?"

"Good. Like, hot.”

"Gee, thanks," you deadpanned, your head tilting to the side as you gave him a blank stare "You sure know how to make me feel confident."

Cassian let out a laugh, placing a soft, large hand on your forearm. "No, no, you always look good. But where ya going?"

You felt a blush creep onto your cheeks, but before you could respond, Rhys appeared behind Cassian, curiosity written all over his face.

"What's happening?" He said as walked in, throwing himself onto your bed. He frowned as his eyes scanned you. "You look pretty. What's going on?"

You let out an exasperated sigh, realizing you were about to have an audience.

"Guys, get out," you said firmly. "I'm going on a date."

Cassian and Rhys exchanged a quick glance before both of the males broke out into large grins.

"Ooooh, a date?" Cassian teased, brushing past you to sit next to Rhysand on your bed.

"Yes, now get out."

You walked towards them, attempting to grab their hands and pull them up with the sheer force of will. Between your futile attempts, Azriel's voice sounded from the doorway. "What are we all doing in your room?"

You let out a loud groan. "Where do you guys keep coming from?"

You turned around to face him, hands on your hips and an annoyed frown on your lips. Just as his brothers did, Azriel's eyes scanned your appearance.

"You look good," he said. His shadows curled around his body, a few around his ear as the corners of his lips turned upwards. "You're going on a date?"

From behind you, Cassian and Rhysand broke out into a sound that you could only describe as a giggle, the grown males turning to one another to make theatrical kissing sounds.

"You guys are so annoying. Get out."

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹ 

There was a soft knock at your door.

You groaned, slipping yourself further into your covers.

The knock came once more and you closed your eyes, hitting the back of your head against your pillow. "Leave me alone!"

Much to your dismay, your protest was met with the sound of your door opening and a heavy set of footsteps approaching your bed. It only took a few seconds before your beige covers were being lifted off your face. You squinted at the light that met your eyes.

"Well, look who's alive."

You scowled as your eyes met Rhysand's violet ones, a large smile on his face as he hovered over you. There was a softness in his eyes that made you feel guilty for the expression, and the scowl quickly turned into a small frown.

As you pulled yourself upright, Rhysand made himself comfortable at the edge of your bed. "How you feeling?"

Your knew your eyes were puffy and sensitive from the crying you'd done all night. You were grateful it was Rhysand who sat in front of you, someone you weren't embarrassed to be seen in such a state with.

"I just got cheated on,” you murmured, rubbing your face with your hands. "How do you think I'm feeling?"

He sighed, a small frown on his lips as he urged you to scoot farther into the bed, making room for him to situate himself next to you. As he maneuvered, you caught sight of your bedside table, now decorated with a large bouquet of multicolored flowers, delicately wrapped in with a white bow. Next to it sat a small bear, its fur a white and blue pattern that perfectly matched that of the ceramic heart gifted to you from Mor.

"Are those for me?"

Rhysand quickly glanced over before giving you a nod.

"Yeah," he said, "The florist gave me a whole explanation for every flower. I told her that I wanted to g-"

Rhys stopped as he noticed your staring, eyes wide as you looked at him, lips curled down. "What?" he asked.

You felt your lip quiver, a small burn in your chest as you looked at him. Realization quickly flickered in his eyes--- realization that you were about to start sobbing.

"Don't make it a thing," Rhys said, staring at you blankly. But as your eyes began to well with tears, his facade quickly broke and he sighed, putting an arm around you and pulling you in. "I had to take care of my best girl, okay?"

Your nose tickled as the corners of your eyesight became blurry, a sudden pool of tears now at the corners of your eyes. "Thank you," you told him, as you burrowed yourself further into his embrace.

You closed your eyes, taking a moment to bathe in the comfortable silence. But a second quickly passed, and both you and Rhysand jerked at the sound of your door slamming into the wall.

"I'm here!" Cassian's voice boomed.

You blinked at the sight in front of you, Cassian's hair messily tied together atop of his head, his hands barely containing a pile of food assortments. His chin rested against 2 tubs of ice cream haphazardly stacked on top one another, his palms desperately grabbing onto a variety of chocolates, candies, bags of chips, and fruits.

His eyes met yours, instantly softening at your appearance. He gave you a smile. "Hey, beautiful. Nice to see ya."

"What you got there, Cass?" Rhys said, his head tilting as he closely scanned the pile his brother clutched to his chest.

"I got everything," he responded, eyes darting between you and Rhys. They settled on you as he continued, "I didn't know what you'd want."

You let out a laugh, your cheeks suddenly straining from the impact of your smile. Your face fell as you examined his haul, your brows furrowing as you pointed to a small plastic bag.

"Are those... pads?"

Cassian attempted to look down, but the ice cream containers beneath his chin constricted his movements. "I'm not sure, the lady at the store said you probably needed them with everything I was buying."

Rhysand let out a snort at this, his hand affectionately rubbing up and down your bicep. You smiled as Cassian shuffled to your couch, carefully dropping the ideas on your cushions, and then moving to place the rest on the table.

"Hey," you said with a frown, "Wheres Az?"

Rhysand and Cassian exchanged a glance.

"What?" You asked, looking between the two males. "Where is he?"

Cassian gave you a sheepish smile and then Rhys was laughing, a deep sound that you felt as his chest moved beneath you.

"Where do you think? He's beating the shit out of Landon."

✹ ✶ 𖧷 ✶✹ 

oh how nice it would be to live with the batboys with the vibes of new girl 😌 (until they do something stupid)

a/n: i’m slowly getting all my drafts and requests out 🫶🏻

[shurisneakers]

Omg hi if you're taking requests can u do one where bucket and reader are like investigating a murder or something and just make them bicker idk I'll read ur grocery list bro you can keep it annoyance to lovers like the "I just want you to stop saying odd shit" bit and then they fall in love

the way i had to cycle through multiple scenarios before landing on this so i could keep it lighthearted. hey sexy. ily mwah mwah

word count: 1.3k

warnings: mild thunderbolts spoilers, swearing, longing, reader being annoying, fake murders

my masterlist over here and my silly little inbox for more requests, should you please

They're trained assassins.

Bob is not.

Yeah he does the dishes, and folds his laundry and rewatches old movies he liked better the first time. But eventually, he realizes he needs something to get him out of bed.

So he starts organizing nights.

Trivia. Gets weirdly competitive, and the tiebreaker is the name of some random model of gun from 1996.

A wine tasting that resulted in seven open bottles, no glasses, and someone using a tactical knife to open a wheel of Brie.

Potlucks, even though they don't know what to do with fifteen packets of Doritos and no real food.

And finally-- murder mystery nights.

Which is objectively deranged, because why are they coming home from their day job to cosplay it at night, but worse.

But it’s Bob. And Bob asks with that quiet, hopeful tone that’s hard to refuse. So they come. They try to stay longer than thirty minutes.

There's a body on the floor, covered in fake blood. None of the metallic smell that usually follows one-- it's something sweet. Suspiciously close to edible.

Bucky arrives late thirty minutes. Ridiculous, considering he lives in the building.

You arrive five minutes after that.

The others have already formed their teams, so he gets paired off with you. He knows why Bob has done this, no one in the tower was particularly subtle about the both of you. To their credit, he doesn't fight it.

The teams have already gotten a headstart, and he doesn't know what to do at a crime scene that he did not cause.

He also knows for a fact that neither of you have read the case file.

"Hmm," you say, kicking at the body with your toe. "Suspicious."

"What?" Bucky asks dryly.

"It appears the victim is...dead."

He stares at you. "That's the fucking game."

"I see," you hum. "As I said. Suspicious. Perhaps the murderer enjoys playing...games."

He closes his eyes. “I forgot how quiet it was when you weren't around.”

“And you hated it.”

“I cleaned the kitchen twice.”

“That’s grief, Bucky.”

He glances at you, expression unreadable. “You think you’re funny.”

“I think I’m observant.”

The corner of his mouth twitches, but doesn't quite lift.

Bucky hands you a sheet of paper. “You’re the maid. You found the body.”

“No. You're the maid. You found the body."

"That's not how this works. This is not a negotiation."

Five minutes later Bucky is the maid. He found the body.

Bucky ignores you trying to lift the thing with one foot.

"Mr. Long was found by his maid, Ms. Bennett, when she came to work," he reads out dryly. "She says to the police, 'Gee''-"

And then he stops.

You raise an eyebrow. "What does she say?"

"I don't know, there's, like fifteen typos on this thing." He squints. "'Gee howdy, well I walked in and he was on the floor, cold as a slice of pie..that was left in the refrigerator'."

"Things that are famously cold." You nod. "Read it again. Put a little drawl into it. Gee howdy."

"No."

“Read it again. Commit.”

“No.” He folds up the paper. "Did you find any clues?"

"None. Where is the chalk?"

"Chalk?"

"I want to outline his body," you tell him.

"That is not a real thing that happens."

"But if we work together, we can live in a world where it does."

You settle for permanent marker. The team was not going to be happy when they see this.

Either way, he doesn't say anything when you hand the cap to him and start drawing around the dummy. He even tells you you missed a spot.

He doesn't mind that he's paired up with you. You'd showed up at midnight and slept through most of the day, so this was really the first time you were speaking since you'd come back.

Yelena and Ava breeze past on the way to the kitchen, clearly more invested. Someone mentions a footprint.

Bucky doesn't even know the murder victim's full name.

"What the fuck are you doing,” Bucky asks, squinting at your latest addition. "What’s this circle?

"I drew a basketball. He looks like he's playing."

He’s about to argue, but something stops him. Maybe it’s the way your finger traces the imaginary arc of the shot. The line of his jaw knows what that feels like. The thought of it makes him swallow just the briefest amount.

He clears his throat. "What is wrong with you."

"Look at his arm. I'm gonna draw him a basket."

"Stop it. We're supposed to be investigating."

"I already investigated. He's straight up dead, man."

''That's not--"

"RIP for real." You nod solemnly. "No chance of a come back."

"Investigate why he's here."

"Well, this is a dummy, Bucky. He's only here 'cause someone left him like this. I think we ought'a find that fool who left his mannequin out here and give him a real talking to."

He drags a palm down his face. "I don't want to be here. You're making this worse."

"Don't worry, we'll get to the bottom of this." You pat his shoulder. "What's this guy's name again?"

"I don't know. Mr Long."

"Mr So-Long." You smile wide. "Because he's dead."

He doesn’t argue. Not really. Not in the way that matters.

Bob asks on the group whether everyone's having fun. Everyone replies with various versions of 'yes'. Bob tells them there are no clues outside, and Alexei and John really have no reason to be rappelling down the side of the Avengers Tower.

Eventually, he starts reading the case notes. Finally, you abandon what you're doing and try to pick up on what's actually going on in the case.

You ignore his need for space, leaning into him to read for yourself.

“Why are you so close?” he mutters.

You don’t move. “I can’t read upside down.”

He reads the same line three times in a row. Can’t retain any of it. His brain is occupied with the way your hands are resting lightly on his wrist.

It's ten minutes to nine. Bucky's been trying to solve this on his own for a while now.

Bob, bless him, has tried to give everyone motives, but they don’t quite make sense. A missing cook. A driver who doesn’t show up until page four. A torn photograph. A coffee stain on the calendar. The date of a car accident circled in red.

You sniff the air. "San Marzano tomatoes."

"I'm pretty sure that's what the blood is made with." He continues reading from the notes. They’re sloppily written. Some of the pages are out of order. The names are inconsistent. The clues are vague.

"No," you say. "This was on purpose. This murder was at the hands of an Italian."

“There are no fuckin' Italians on the suspect list," he lies, knowing fully well he has no idea who the other suspects are, or if there are any.

"Fine. What other tomato-forward cuisines do you know?"

Bucky groans. "Let’s just say it was the maid. She poisoned him. Case closed.

"Well, actually Bucky, it's the driver. He took the fall for the crash a few years ago, got blamed for something that wasn’t really his fault. He drops Mr. Long off, follows him inside, kills him with a car key. The wound is something small. Multiple stabs, more than necessary, so it's definitely personal."

He stares at you.

He wonders if you meant the kiss you gave him before you left. He wonders if it meant anything to you. He’s been wondering that all week.

"Oh hey, you guys got it," Bob says, poking his head into the room. "Nice. I'll go tell the others you won."

"It was all Bucky. All I did was draw a chicken with his fingers."

Bucky shakes his head, but it’s with a softness you’ve seen before. Usually when you come back from a mission in one piece. When you make him laugh by accident. When he forgets, briefly, how much he isn’t supposed to want this.

"One more question, Bob," you say, spinning around. "Where was the driver from?"

“Oh, Ricci? Naples. Italian.”

"I fucking knew it."

here’s my ko-fi if you’d like to support my writing!

[slushycoookie]

Kinktober Day 5 ~ Size Difference

Ryomen Sukuna x AFAB! Reader

Summary: You take a moment to realize how gigantic Lord Sukuna is. (cw: Heian Era! Sukuna, brief mention of violence and death, Vaginal fingering) Minors DNI!

A/N: I'm about to have this picture as my lock screen, he looks so good...Hope you all enjoy!

Prev *✧･ﾟ: Next Kinktober '24 Masterlist

Lord Sukuna was gigantic.

It disturbed you at first. The way he practically shook the earth while he walked. His four arms span halfway across a wall. How you have to crane your head to set your eyes on him every time. Even his clothes, how they could blanket over you if he set them upon you. You weren’t sure how Uraume was able to carry them with ease.

Now, you couldn’t help but be fascinated.

Was he always that big? Of course not. That’s a stupid thought. But he is a curse. Did curses come out of the womb that huge? Or was this just a Sukuna thing?

You’ve always wanted to ask ever since you were tasked of keeping him company. Not necessarily a plaything yet. But like an object. Someone to be by his side and not say a word while he did his duties. And who wasn’t afraid of having people be murdered in front of you without a second thought. You’ve been at his estate for only six months, but you’ve seen it all at that point.

His presence was imposing to the point where you couldn’t help but stare whenever you had a chance. Just enough for him not to notice so you wouldn’t get in trouble.

“You’re gawking.”

Sukuna’s sudden voice makes you jump. His back was facing you and you noticed his hearty muscles. The king had a bow and arrow, practicing on a few dummies from afar. They were long dead, but you weren’t able to smell the corpses.

“I was.” There was no reason to lie. You were probably already dead at this point for gazing at him.

“At whom?” He’s facing you now, weapon still in hand. Just in case you say something he doesn’t like.

“Towards you, my lord. I was curious at how huge you are.”

Sukuna tilts his head, tossing aside the bow. You do your best to relax as his heavy footsteps go towards you. Once again, you crane your neck to keep eye contact. He likes when you look at him directly.

“I didn’t think I picked an idiot.” On instinct, you suck your teeth, but quickly cover your mouth since that showed disrespect. That amused him, though. A twinge of a smirk appeared on his face. You weren't dead yet. “Finally, you show some personality. I was wondering how long you were going to keep being docile.”

“I didn’t want you to kill me.”

“I kill anyone, you’re not special.”

He raises his hand before resting it on the top of your head. It’s warm, oddly comforting. You couldn’t help but nudge your head into his palm when it rests on your cheek.

“You admire my gigantic form?” You nod and he lets out a guttural noise of approval. His thumb rests on your lips, causing you to part them, gently sucking on it. You watch his eyes lower at his thumb in your mouth. “It’s only my thumb and look at how you’re taking me…”

You grip his arm, not wanting him to stop. The grip was tight enough to form small indents on his skin. Sukuna growls and you worry if you advanced too far, but he only pulls out his thumb, a pop escaping your lips.

“A tiny little thing filled with so much want.”

Suddenly, he grabs you, sitting down to have you on his lap. Two arms around your waist, one cradling your face. Your hands are sprawled on his chest and you take in how small they are compared to his broad chest. You squeeze your thighs together at the sight.

Sukuna notices and holds you closer so you can feel how hot his body is getting.

“Speak. You started this.”

“My lord.” You move to remove his robe, seeing his built upper torso. “I’d like to experience more of your size.”

He grunts in satisfaction when you slide your arms up to his neck, taking in how you could barely wrap around them. Sukuna’s hand cups your bottom before pulling you into a kiss. Even his tongue was huge as you felt it in the back of your throat. It makes you croon under his touch.

You're now below him, feeling his faces at the pulse of your neck, taking in how it picks up speed due to his actions. His entire body overshadows yours as he's undressing you and you don’t worry about anyone seeing you two in this state. Because your lord would kill anyone if they dare to set their eyes.

Sukuna's gigantic hand gropes the mound of your breast. Pinching your tiny nipples while he traverses the rest of you. He maps out your body as if he’s touched you before. Your whimpers are enough to tell him you're enjoying it while not wanting to bring more attention to yourself.

“I wonder what else you can take.”

His finger dips between your legs, making you croon. This was just one, and it was already thick enough to brush along your walls. Covered in your slickness. You're not sure if you can take more, body burning up from his constant advances. You even try to move away, but he doesn't allow it, covering both of your hands with one hand.

“My l-lord…I don't…I don't think I can…”

“You can and you will.” His swipes of your sensitive clit makes you cry, tears welling in the corners of your eyes.

“My Lord…S-Sukuna!”

A satisfied growl shakes you when you climax for him. His features are pleased when you drench his finger with your juices, watching you pant lowly under his hold.

“You did well.” He leans forward, breath fanning your flushed face. His red eyes scan your body as if he was captivated by you. “But you need more practice.”

Tags (let me know if you wanna be added/removed): @fandomfics

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@eyes-ofhell @maxad99 @howlingco

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[babextoken]

𓍯I just want to be the sum of your broken parts𓂃

Dangerous to Me series ⟡˙⋆chapter 3

Catch up or relive it ⟡˙⋆1 2

summary: a new bombshell, mothmansdad, enters the villa; or your online buddy suggests you try to connect with Vessel after he took a punch for you; or, vessel threatens to host a social event pairing: vessel x reader wc: 1.3k head's up: series, slowish burn, enemies to lovers, coworkers au, video rental store au, plus size reader, brief ptsd flashback, rude!vessel, texting, sexualizing vessel beating that dude, licking blood off lips, they're both still weird dummies a/n: the series has a name now! also I feel like this is filler but I had a lot of fun writing it, so hey 🍍s 𓈒⟡₊⋆∘˚⊹ Situation Enjoyers™: @lifemod17 @glitterghost @adenobabe  @jeriiicho @milk--bones  @myaudiocommentary  @horsebiologist @intake-of-breath @fruitsandcheese @killed-by-thegods @goosepond69 @friendly-neighborhood-ghoul @lynzeequitlollygagging @thatxxjiyong-ssi  @cloudy-soul @daddysaidbringthethunder  @evisnotok @cheomain @object-of-my-desire @dreamer-lost-in-wonderland @blvckmvgicwoman @canopies-of-gold-and-evergreen @thewayyoulay @houseofsleeptoken @jerrysghostwriter @music-lover23 @renegadebirch @blackcherrywhiskey

recommended listening:

𓍯𓂃

Your body couldn’t make up its mind. At first when you got home from today’s shift, it felt as though you would sleep for 20 years the second you sat on your couch. Instead, the firmness of the couch’s back reminded you of the brick wall you glued yourself to while Vessel pummeled your…well…he was no one to you now. But that didn’t make it any less terrifying when the whole ordeal happened again behind your eyelids, the same screams getting stuck and dying in your throat before they could come out. Wide awake and very much aware of your panic. The body keeps the score, and baby, you’re losing. Mercifully, your phone buzzes. 

mothmansdad: i cannot sleep 😔 im going to die of sleep deprivation 

It was your new little friend from your “sad person chatroom,” at least that’s what your friends back home called it. It was a platform for making connections and, yes, sometimes people are sad there! You just desperately needed some connection, nothing wrong with that. 

you: damn. I’ll miss you 

Did you know who mothmansdad was? No. Did you really care? Honestly…no. You were evolved enough to not be too scared of internet strangers while also keeping them a healthy distance. For now he was someone neutral to talk to and needed a friend as much as you did. 

mothmansdad: yeah yeah. how was work? x you: honestly? mothmansdad: that’s preferable  you: kind of shit but mostly because I don’t feel like I can talk about what happened  … … … … … … mothmansdad: oh, with the guy? why can’t you talk about it? Has someone shut you down? Because if they’re telling you not to talk about itsg… you: no. I haven’t even tried…I haven’t even tried talking to my coworker that stepped in. 

What you didn’t tell your friend was how Vessel acted after the fight. How he toed the line between a needy pathetic boy and an infantilizing dominant type. And since you hadn’t shared those details you still got to keep it a secret how attractive it was to see Vessel step in. Yes it was the bare minimum to defend someone being assaulted, but this was a first…seeing someone put their body on the line for you.

“Gotten myself all fucked up haven’t I?”

Vessel’s chin wobbled when had asked that. That would stick with you forever. He wasn’t vitriolic. It was like a realization of the person he’d been five minutes before. But recently you remembered another thing from that night that only revealed itself after replaying it in your mind for the 100th time since it happened. When Vessel got punched, you saw him lick the first drops of blood from his lip and smile. Fuck, he might have even chuckled. That moment fueled your fantasies for weeks. But part of you wanted to pull you down and tell you that you weren’t allowed to feel that way. You can’t feel happiness or pleasure, you should be sad. Scared The shame didn’t stick. You couldn’t help but imagine what would happen if you had kissed Vessel to thank him. If you had straddled his lap to clean his wounds. If you offered yourself to him as thanks. 

mothmansdad: and he hasn’t talked to you about it? you: no. But he seems to watch me a little closer, which is actually kinda comforting?  mothmansdad: maybe you should say something. Like another “thank you” or idk.  you: yeah, you’re right. mothmansdad: as always, I know. But think about it, he probably doesn’t know what to say. Not everyday someone gets clocked in the face because they happen upon sex pest  you: alright alright I’ll talk to him.  mothmansdad: you can’t bottle this up you: I’ve talked to you about it though… mothmansdad: that’s not the same, dove, and you know it.

It was also not lost on you that mothmansdad flirted with you. And you flirted right back. You both didn’t know anything about each other (except you’re in the same ish area and you had work drama) and quite frankly that was freeing. 

you: ok, I’ll for sure talk to him tomorrow. mothmansdad: good girl. get some sleep x

The next evening when you come in for your shift, Vessel’s trying to get the wall of TVs to sync with a new movie but there’s a delay. You step right next to him and watch the same scene happen across five screens, all at different parts. Without turning to look at him, you breach the topic.

“I really…can’t thank you enough for your help the other night.”

Vessel also keeps his eyes forward and sighs.

“I wish you didn’t have to thank me…but…you’re welcome. You didn’t deserve that.”

“Yeah…yeah. You’re right. Not the first time I’ve been through something like that…I-“

“Stop surrounding yourself with shit men.”

You scoff hard and finally look at him, only to realize his chin was wobbling again. “Ves…”

“Just. Stop it. Maybe just swear off men for a bit or something.”

“Hey listen…are YOU ok after that?”

He finally meets your gaze. His lip has healed but there’s still the yellow tinge of plasma near his chin. “No. No I’m not. I don’t act like that. Ever. You made me do that.”

“Ok this is verging towards slut shaming and-“

“Would you keep your voice down?” Vessel hisses. “What I mean is you being in trouble made me do that. If you would just listen to me and not assume the worst every time my tone isn’t to your liking…”

“Look, I’m sorry, ok. It just sounded like…” you sigh and have the fleeting realization you’ve never said anything to you about his tone. Just to your little friend. “I apologize. I appreciate you standing up for me. And I hope you’re doing ok. I’m sure that was…scary and painful.” 

Vessel sniffs and rubs his hand over his face and up through his hair. “I’m…not. I’m not ok. But we’re not making this about me.” Vessel shakes his head like he’s quieting a voice in his head (because he is). “Look. Uhm. I finished my EP,” he tries to lighten the mood but his tone doesn’t match. He must have noticed how unenthusiastic he sounded because he does a little flourish with his hands and says “yeaaahhhh” only to sigh and rub his face as if he hated himself for that. 

“Well…wow! That’s…that’s great! You should be proud. Bet it sounds good. And I’m sure you worked hard...bet you’re glad to be done too! Or maybe not. Maybe you liked the process and…”

Nothing quite like having an earnest conversation with someone you passively don’t get along with to make you forget how to stop talking. As you blabber, Vessel wonders if this is what he’s like when he gets going. He stares a bit blankly, desperate for you to just…he puts his hand up. “Well, listen. Don’t go around spreading this but I’m having a little listening party this weekend.”

“Uh wwhhyyy can’t I say anything?”

He looks around conspiratorially and lowers his voice to a whisper. “Because not everyone here is cool enough to get invited. You know what I mean?”

You nod and salute. “Secret’s safe with me.”

“There we go. Good girl.”

You scoff with a laugh. “People keep calling me that.”

“Must be what you are, then. I’ll give you my address later. I need you to put some returns away. Off you pop.”

You roll your eyes and feel a little lighter. The next morning, you hop on chat to tell mothmansdad that he was right. You just needed to check in with Vessel. But before you can open the app, your phone buzzes. It’s just Vessel sending his address. Yeah, yeah. Go away! You open the chat with mothmansdad only to find that...you can't. No user found. The whole thread now just an error message. You poured your heart out to this stranger with no expectation of returning in kind. You felt heard. The evidence of the compassion you received now deleted without a trace...and a string of messages you’ll never see. Lost in the ether.

mothmansdad: you haunt every corner of my mind. how do you do that? how you've overtaken me is like possession. meditate on that, dove. mothmansdad: as if my tortured mind needs something else to ruminate over. mothmansdad: the thoughts I can manage. I can busy my mind and body in ways that push you away. that is until I remember the dreams. I cannot control the way you greet me there. the way you take me in. mothmansdad: your moans a call to prayer. how I wish to devour you. how I long to drink from your fount until devotion becomes hedonism. A mockery of communion.

[minnies-puppydoll]

{ Kinkmas Day 2: }

🎁 .*• Gift Wrapped •*. 🎁

pairing: minho x reader

summary: what's the best way to spend time with your lover if you aren't tied up? minho found a new skill to teach his viewers, and you just so happen to be the test dummy.

warnings: hard dom!minho, bondage, camming, sex toys, praise, degradation, impact play, overstimulation, exibitionism, homosexual/ship implications, if i missed any let me know!!

note: IM SORRY THIS SHIT IS SO LATE🫣

dating someone like minho was sure an adventure. you were aware of his camming job before you really got official, and to be honest, it wasnt really a suprise to you.

minho has always come across as a domineering person. of course, he still has his sweet, almost motherly caring moments for you…when he isn’t forcing your legs apart and showing his viewers how to treat a slutty pussy like yours.

even his humor seems sadistic, its like in every aspect of life, he loves to see you writhing the most.

minho’s cam show is all about BDSM instruction. all of the content is based around sexual safety and health, while also keeping it pornographic with live demonstrations, starring his obedient, loving girlfriend.

tonight’s live was no different, but it was a little intimidating you have to admit. minho would go out every week to this unknown location, he wouldn’t tell you what it was about, and when you asked he just said it was a suprise.

you were about to assume the worst, till he came home with a long, tied up cord of red rope hanging out of his bag, and peered at you excitedly.

it was a face you were very familiar with, a pleased, almost shy smile lit up his face as he greeted you, before taking your hand and coaxing you into the bedroom.

he told you he has been going to shibari classes for his streams, and he wants to play with you on live and show everyone what he learned.

you were hesitant at first, till you remembered, if he’s been taking classes for this long then he’s probably good, and you know for a fact minho, being the responsible dom he is, would never try something like this on you unless he was sure he was good.

so here you sat, all pretty in a lace black set, next to the intimidating bundles of shibari rope that’ll be restricting you soon, along with a few other selected toys. but it’s fine. you trust your boyfriend to do what’s best for you.

“alright..everything is all set up. are you sure you want to do this? it’s never too late to back out if you feel uncomfortable.”

“yeah! honestly..i was a little nervous, but now i’m getting pretty excited.”

“oh? is the pretty whore already messing up her new set? such a good girl, but does she remember her safewords?”

“uh huh!”

“go on then.”

“red means stop, yellow means pause and discuss, and green means keep going!”

“good girl! such a smart little thing aren’t you?”

the large webcam setup clicks on, revealing you and minho in the reflection. the familiar system of the camsite focuses you as minho hovers over the livecam button.

“we are live in 3..2..1!”

minho sits on the bed next you, prettily fixing up his hair and taking on a serious look in his eyes, before cheerfully saying his intro as viewers flood and start commenting.

bbok.flx: omg i was first ㅜㅜ that’s a bit embarrassing..

j.onee: i had this stream time on an alarm bro

“hello everyone, you’ve just joined lee know’s weekly sexual education stream..”

you giggled to yourself, you knew lee know was just an online alias, but it was still such a cute name for an intimidating man like your minho.

“if you’re new here, i’m lee know. i work as a professional dom, and this is my little demonstration doll right here next to our topic object tonight.”

minho moved behind you, stroking his hands over your soft body to show you off. you relax in his touch, fluttering your lashes to the camera in front of you.

“there she is. isn’t she pretty? god..look at that, this whore is already wet for all of you.”

the chat moves faster, reading all of these filthy comments about you works you up even further. a few even make you laugh a bit.

fck_hyune: i love seeing her tits. the things i would do to a girl like that ughh

j.onee: i should be her god THIS ISNT FAIR.

minho cracks a loud slap to your thigh, before picking up the rope and unwravelling it slowly, making a bit of a show for the audience. he holds it up to the camera, sliding it between his hands like a pet.

“that’s right, the lesson starting tonight is bondage. i will be teaching you how to safely execute shibari ties on a submissive. this is only lesson one of this subject, so i will only demonstrate one full tie for you this stream.”

minho reads a few comments, then bites his lip, smiling devilishly.

cbbang97: cute rope lee know, but we all know who the real slut is~

he sighs before placing his hands on your shoulders and leaning down to rest his head on you, arching his back a bit behind you so the chat can see his pretty hips and gorgeous thick thighs you and the audience fantasize about.

“excited? i can feel you squirming behind your screens, but you all know the rules. i’ll only go through with the lesson if you pay the fuck up, hm? i want three hundered in donations right now, or i’ll just end the stream now and leave this slut untouched.

minho commands the chat, and you know he isn’t bluffing either. you rub your thighs together and smile when donations start to flood in. but only 105 dollars? that isn’t enough for minho.

“tch. really? you expect to excite me with that pitiful amount? seriously, pay it or i’m done.”

j.onee: SOMEONE PLZ PAY SERIOUSLY IM BROKE AS FUCK

bbok.flx: hehe i got u one sec ^o^

minho cuts his eyes at the camera, tapping his finger impatiently, before looking pleased at the large donation of 300 on its own. that’s more than what he asked for, and he swears he can feel his cock growing in his pants at the sound of the donation ring.

“good job. all of you are being so good for me, follwing directions, want this lesson now as a reward? let’s begin with a chest harness.”

minho sits behind you, he pets your hair sweetly, spreading the rope out in his hand. he sticks his tongue out obscenely before licking up the rope, his dark eyes never leaving the camera.

“start with your rope doubled by looping it in your fingers, then simply wrap it around the submissive, just under their chest.”

he follows his words expertly sliding the looped rope under your boobs, he does it slowly though, making sure he doesn’t hurt you.

“loop the end through the back, then repeat again.”

his words aren’t loud or aggressive, yet you’re sure they could make a mountain move. you say nothing and keep still, letting whatever pretty commands he makes flow out of his mouth. you swear you’d serve him for the rest of your life, your sweet love.

. . .

as the ties and teachings go on for a while, you feel yourself slipping into a familiar, euphoric headspace and the feeling of the restricting rope over your shoulders and breasts, down to your tied up wrists behind your back.

he occasionally answers questions in chat about parts of the knots, or ask you your color.even though it took a long time, you feel like it was over too soon as he tightens the final knot over your ribcage. despite streaming porn, he still leans down and kisses your head sweetly, checking on you.

“feel good? is anything too tight? just say the word and ill comepletely untie it.”

“it feels so good, min-“

he quickly puts a finger up to his mouth, reminding you to not say his real name.

“ah! sorry! it feels fine, lee know.

minho smiles and kisses your cheek, before moving up to sit in front of the camera to show you off.

“this is what the harness should look like when it’s completed. did you follow along? im sure you did such a good job. you always do, y’know?”

j.onee: it would be better if u did it on me instead food for thought

ppup_m1nnie: j.one a simp fr

cbinniwh0re: hes not letting you hit bro

j.onee: SHUT UP

“silly things. getting impatient? should we move on to the fun part of the stream?”

the chat moves at a crazy speed. a few eager viewers have already donated and sent requests, but minho already knows what he wants to do today.

minho adjust you to sit center in front of the camera. he picks up two toys to play with, and holds them to the camera. letting chat decide what he’ll use on your restricted form first.

in his left hand, he holds a pretty clit sucker with purple accents. in his right, he holds a black riding crop with a red heart.

“i’ll be nice and give you a choice today, hm? say A if you wanna see me use this clit sucker on her pretty pussy before i fuck her brains out, or B if you want me to mark her ass red with the crop. choose wisely between pleasure or pain.”

ppup_m1nnie: B

cbbang97: B for sure

bbok.flx: srry but B would be so hot god

j.onee: A PLS OMG

ppup_m1nnie: …

ppup_m1nnie: block j.one

j.onee: BRUH

“hm..looks like B is the winner. you wanna see her suffer that bad, huh?”

minho places the clit sucker on his bedside for later use. he sits back behind you, putting his hand over your eyes and dragging the smooth leather of the crop along your back.

his jaw drops with yours in faux arousal, imagining how you must feel. he takes his hand off your eyes and pushes you face down on the bed. he feels your pretty ass in his hands, you know he loves your ass.

minho stops teasing and lets the crop crack down on your ass for the first time. you yelp loud like a puppy, flinching at the sting. it hurts, but the first time only makes you wanna feel more. you swallow and relax your bdoy for him, waiting for his next strike.

“color?”

“green.”

“i love you.”

“i know. i love you too, min-“

the next hit lands right after your sentence. this one feels like fire, it ignites with pain but burns like pleasure through your dripping cunt.

“what’s my name?”

“mm’fuck..lee know?”

“wrong.”

minho pulls you up by a firm grip on the ropes tied around your arms, his mouth right next to your ear. you squirm in the ropes uselessly in his grasp.

“what’s my name, whore.

“lee know! it’s lee know!”

this time it’s his hand that corrects you, spanking you once with a harder force than the crop. he moves you closer by your neck slightly, pressing your red ass against his bulge, wetting the fabric.

“if you keep getting it wrong i’ll just keep hurting you. you know what i wanna hear from that dirty mouth, slut. you’re doing this to yourself.”

you can barely respond. his words alone have your mind fuzzy and dumb for him already, and his cock isn’t even in you yet.

“answer me. i won’t ask you again.”

you’re quickly woken up from your daze when minho lets go of you and drops you down on the bed. the ropes on your arms make you fall directly on your chest, ending with a painful hit with the crop. this one hurt the most, but it also had you crying out in pleasure for your dom.

“sir! sir- that’s your fucking name, sir..fucking feels so good..”

“ah, so you do know how to use your words.”

“please..need your big cock s’bad, sir..”

you grind your hips down on his bulge desperately as more begs spill from your lips.

“well, you know the rules. if they wanna see that, they have to give me their fucking money.”

minho grinds himself back on your pussy, letting out a few shaky breaths at the feeling of the tension in his pants being slightly relieved. he looks at the camera with a slutty expression on his face.

“fuck..you all have been so good, i think you deserve a reward. wanna see me fuck this bitch into the mattress?”

fck_hyune: god fuck yes

j.onee: fucking a dildo rn thinking of you

j.onee: wish it was your fucking cock pounding me instead while i eat her out

bbok.flx: realest take ive ever heard

i.yen.01: i wish i was HIM. her little noises are so cute jsndbn

“seems like a yes. you all know the drill, get the donations up to eight hundered and this cock is all yours.”

minho flips you over on your back restraints and unzips his pants, he makes a show out of pulling his dripping cock out of his boxers. he’s always been big, that attitude he has isn’t for nothing. he bats his lashes at the camera, while circling his thick, pink tip with his thumb.

he dips his thumb into his slit and lets out a faint moan at the feeling. he chuckles shyly at the noise he made and teases his chat.

“ah..look at it fucking dripping..this is what you paid for.”

fck_hyune: im so broke now but ts is worth every penny so far

cbinniwh0re: hey who says i need to pay rent

j.onee: fuckk i need that fucking cock in my mouth noww ur streams are torture.

minho looks down at you, he moves the hair out of your face and circles his hand soothingly along the small of your back.

“still okay, sweet girl? ropes good?”

you arch your back and squirm your arms to show him that the ropes are secure and not too tight.

“hm. okay. color?”

“green, jus’ want your cock.”

you pout. minho hums and running his cock through your folds, collecting the wetness on his tip and jerking it softly. he runs his finger up a vein and throbs around nothing till more precum drips down his cock.

all you can hear are the obscene sounds of him jerking his wet cock and letting out soft airy moans. it torture. you just want him inside you, but the ropes leave you helpless and pliant as you just whine impatiently at his sounds.

without warning, he spreads you open and slides his cock inside, forcing more in with short, forceful thrusts. he circles his hips inside you slowly once he’s all the way in.

“fuck! sir, yes! so fucking big.. mmplease fuck me please i’m such a good girl-“

minho shoves your head down into the pillows and grabs something off the counter. you feel something attach to your clit and start sucking it roughly. the clit sucker from earlier. it’s too much. you squirm your hips around, but all that does is work minho inside you deeper.

“if you’re such a good girl, then fucking take it.”

minho graps the ropes on your wrists as leverage to pull you back on his cock over and over. he just started moving and he’s already pounding the shit out of you. the double stimulation of the suction on your clit and the cock rubbing along your g-spot, already has you close.

“ah! fuck! fuckfuckfuck sir don’t fucking stop please..”

“gonna cum already? go ahead but im not stopping till i cum.”

he reaches under you and clicks the clit sucker into a higher setting that has you squirting around his cock in seconds. your eyes roll back as your thighs tremble and drip from your intense orgasm.

minho takes the clit sucker off of your puffy, wet clit and leans forward, he places his hands on either sides of your waist and fucks into you roughly. pounding your pussy just the way you like.

your brain is absolute mush. you’ve never cum that quickly before in your life, and he won’t stop.

“you like that huh? like being my little fucktoy on livestream? want everyone to see your little pussy leak my cum everywhere?”

“yes! fuck yes, pleaseplease- mark me, claim my fucking cunt, sir..”

“okay. just for you..fuck, i’m gonna cum..”

with a few more satisfying thrusts and he’s spilling inside you. rutting out his orgasm inside you and placing sweet kisses down your back.

“sweet girl..milking my cock. keep all my fucking cum, you earned it. such a good girl.”

minho pulls out, you’re about to protest till you feel something else sliding inside you. minho places a pretty, red plug in your pussy, keeping all his cum inside you.

“shh. you can rest for a second while i wrap up stream, okay? i love you.”

“i know, i love you too. minho.” you whisper.

. . .

“so! did you all enjoy the stream? did you get to cum too? i hope so.”

j.onee: i don’t think i’ve ever cum so hard in my life

fck_hyune: ..i don’t know which of you i’d rather be honestly

“im glad you did, but! it’s time to say goodbye. don’t be sad though. the next stream is in a week anyway so stay tuned. say bye bye!”

bbok.flx: awe bye bye ;(

cbinniwh0re: byebye silly

cbbang97: ill miss youuuuu

ppup_m1nnie: bye yall

j.onee: ILY SEE U IN A WEEK

ppup_m1nnie: glazer

“hm, see you soon, j.one.”

j.onee: OH MY GOD

ppup_m1nnie: oh shit

taglist: @estella-novella @thatonedarkskinnedsiren @theresstardustinmyblood @annafeebou @pancake-freckle @elizalabs3 @minniesverse @loxgirl2004 @mintymintmint251 @y-ur--i @liv1sworld

pink=didnt work

[fuckyeahgoodomens]

Good Omens graphic novel update: December 2024

We promised a graphic novel treat for December to send off 2024, which we have at the end of the update, so let's dive in!

Colleen has been working diligently ahead of the graphic novel going to print next month, which she discussed over on Patreon. For those looking for more behind the scenes on both Good Omens and Colleen's work more broadly, we recommend either following her Substack, or subscribing via Patreon, as she approaches the finish line.

A snapshot from our production HQ where dummy books of the graphic novel, slipcase and other editions of Good Omens have been arriving thick and fast. The graphic novel (slipcased version shown) has quite the heft to it. It's going to be such a magnificent object inside and out.

Here, we're testing out the various papers, finishes, embellishments and more – everything is falling into place!

Merch-wise, some more delights. The A.Z. Fell & Co tote bag design is in, one side in celebration of our favourite angelic bookseller, the other as if it's been purchased from the bookshop itself, so you can take your pick.

We've got more pins that will be available in the 3-pin set add ons. While the full list will be available in 2025, we're happy to share a few more to get excited about:

On the trading card front, have a look at some of the base deck designs by Steve Gregson and Kirsty Hunter in situ as this all comes together rather nicely, and causes a heated game or two behind the scenes.

And, a quick admin note to wrap up that we always recommend checking the FAQ page as a first port of call for any queries. If you have questions tied to specific tiers, we'd suggest checking the last few updates if your answer can't be found on the FAQ. If there is any information required for your pledge, we will be in touch. We will be back at full steam in the New Year!

Thank you.

So, to wrap up this year's updates, we give you the draft of the full first scene of the graphic novel, artwork by Colleen Doran and lettering by Lois Buhalis. If you'd like to wait until the graphic novel publishes in Spring, skip everything after the ducks!

To 2025 🥂

Until next time.

+ post from Colleen Doran:

Good Omens: You Get...Stuff Like This

In the most recent Good Omens update at the Kickstarter, a few people got upset at the suggestion that you have to get past my paywall here to see Good Omens updates.

Except you really don't, and the post doesn't actually say you do. You get a bit more, like pics of my studio, a discussion of tools and process - but not all of that is exclusively about Good Omens.

I think the Dunmanifestin team just wanted to draw a little attention to my blogs and other works, for which I am very grateful.

As my Patreon supporters already know, Good Omens info posted here gets to the Substack and Kickstarter eventually. And since most of my posts here aren't just about Good Omens, but my other projects and personal stuff, as well as links to our weekly Virtual Art Studio sessions, I think I'm justified in keeping that material behind a paywall.

In fact, I don't think I've posted much stuff about Good Omens since the summer: pages of flats like the one you see above, a few studio photos, and color tweaks.

Also, me boo-hooing about my nerves and health.

But for those who feel left out missing even this small amount of stuff, then the screen shot above is for you.

That's called a flat.

It's a prelim color before adding final color.

Here's what the final color looks like.

So I've posted a handful of this sort of thing since this summer, but frankly, there's even more of my sketches and so on posted at my Instagram that aren't here at all.

For those who don't know, I am doing most of the color myself on the book, but I am working with assistants. I'm not sure how much the Dunmanifestin team wants out there before the big reveals, but here's a snippet of a sky.

In the first image, my flat color.

And after my assistant worked on it.

Here, I've done a repaint. Sometimes I do very extensive repaints after the assistant works on a page. Sometimes not so much. I didn't use assistants on many pages at all. About 80% of the labor on the color of the book is my work.

However, the assistants have been a big help, and I am very appreciative of them.

I will make a point to go through all my prior posts and get every single bit of art that you haven't seen and make it public for all of you in the coming weeks. I need to excise it from previous posts. As I respect the privacy of all my readers, I never make prior posts public without their permission as they may not want their comments or identities to be public.

Thanks so much for everything!

[fireflowersims]

Sissysims' sins against the scenegraph

This is a small follow-up to my initial post covering the code theft commited by @sissysims. In that post, I presented my proof in the form of a YT video. While that video started off private, I decided to make it public for various reasons, which I will not outline in this post.

I first want to express my gratitude to all those who left comments, reblogged and liked my post. Your support means the world to us. I'm so happy that you as a community are so supportive in this. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart. Thank you to all of you. ♥️

Now, this post is going to focus on just one thing: her incompetence at object creation, because honestly, it's bad. It's really bad. It would feel immoral not to discuss it.

This is just a glimpse and for all you object creators out there: I'm warning you, it's graphic.

How to create an object for dummies.

So, this is the simplest explanation I can give on making a new object. This is the basic process you follow for basically most things you will make: open up SimPE, open up the Object workshop and press open. Select your file and choose "clone". Leave the settings alone, defaults are fine. Give your new object a nice name and description. Be sure to give it a unique object name. Now do all your visual modifications by modifying the existing scenegraph resources (GMDC, TXTR, etc) and give your object a new GUID (making sure to update MMAT's). Now fix integrity, save your file and done. You can test and preferably you'd also compressorize.

So what did sissysims do wrong?

Simply said: everything. I have reasons to believe she has never followed a basic object creation tutorial. The mistakes she makes are mistakes that can be avoided by actually learning how to clone an object. Here is a small summary:

Not cloning anything, instead copying the file she wants to modify and opening that in SimPE

Not changing the object name. I have never seen her touch the fix integrity button

Using other people's meshes and textures. How? By way of opening up their files, noting down the 3D Object Name, extracting the scenegraph resources (GMDC, GMND, CRES, SHPE, TXTR, TXMT, MMAT) and putting them inside the package she's modifying (and modifying the 3D Object Name in the original package). I have not seen her open up a GMDC file or import or export a mesh or texture. She does not modify any of these scenegraph files afterwards.

Not updating the MMAT's with new GUID

Not cleaning out unused resources (see: the scenegraph fuckery above)

Never fixing integrity.

Sadly, this is not just the case with my vendor. It is all her projects. This is how she creates objects: she has never learned the proper way to create objects and thus she steals other people's hard work instead.

Pictured: the instructions provided for messing up my vendor. Note how she specifically instructs to extract resources from your mesh source. Not export. No: extract.

Pictured: the results of said messed up procedure on another creation of hers. Note how the gmdc of her object is literally identical to the gmcd of Michelle's original mesh (only credited in a readme, not in the post itself)

Why is this an issue?

This is not just an issue of someone being bad at creating objects. This is someone teaching others this messed up method that comes down to stealing other people's work. I believe that this is actively damaging to our community and newcomers' skill development. Her video teaches people bad modding habits. Her video ENCOURAGES people to use this method to make fundamentally flawed, fundamentally dysfunctional objects.

She claims to be wanting to make modding more accessible, but this video of hers is not helping with that in any shape or form. You need to know what you're doing in order to teach someone and her object creation skills are below the level of someone who followed a tutorial ONCE.

Ya know, I could make a video teaching people Serbian. I don't know anything about that language. It's Slavic I guess. I don't even know how it's pronounced, but I sure as hell could tell people that whatever sequence of sounds is coming out of my mouth is Serbian. And that using my tutorial you can have nice conversations with Serbians! Doesn't mean I should though. It would be misrepresentative, offensive and actually damaging to anyone who is serious about wanting to learn Serbian. The same principle applies to sissysims teaching modding.

I want to learn how to make objects and mods tho!

Good news, there are a lot of great tutorials out there by people who do know what they're doing (unlike sissysims). For basic object creation I would highly recommend this tutorial by Azaya/ @skulldilocks at Garden of Shadows. It's the tutorial that got me started with objects and it has plenty of pictures. If you follow this tutorial, you will be ten times better at object creation than sissysims is

For BHAV modding there is no better place to start than Echo's tutorial. I can also highly recommend @midgethetree's resources page as well as all the useful information @picknmixsims has on his site.

What now?

I will keep working on even better vendor code, which I hope to get to a testable state very soon. It's clear that there's interest in this sort of object, and the new vendor base will allow for a lot of flexibility in gameplay. Once I get it to a good working state, I will make a tutorial on how to make your own: a tutorial that'll actually tell you the why. If you can clone objects (the proper way), you will be able to make a vendor.

Also, please don't engage with sissysims in her youtube comments, not even to "defend our honour" or to say something about the theft. She knows what she did and has presumably received a tumblr notification that I mentioned her (again).

I am sissysims and I don't like this

Well, you have a lot of nerve "teaching" people to mod when you clearly don't know what you're doing. I encourage you to stop stealing other people's work and educate yourself (see resources above).

[tr4gictea]

Smoker Trail [Aizawa+Smoker!Teen!Reader]

❥Masterlist

Tags: Underage smoking, angst to comfort, implied domestic abuse, Dadzawa, written while the author was high off their mind (don't do drugs kids)

Including: Shota Aizawa, mention of Katsuki Bakugo

word count: 1.3k words

A/n: Im really getting into MHA rn and I will be doing a lot of that now so if you have any request for My Hero, send a request pleaseeee. Enjoy <3

You were standing on the rooftop of the U.A. dorms, leaning against the railing with a lit cigarette between your fingers. You blew out smoke into the night air blissfully unaware of your surroundings. The rest of the class was asleep in their rooms, none would be awake to see you. Suddenly the roof door opens, mid inhale, to reveal your teacher, Mr. Aizawa. You quickly flick the cigarette off the roof and cough the smoke into your jacket.

He turns towards you, “Y/n? Kid, what are you doing up so late?” he says raising an eyebrow.

Fuck, he has awful timing. You were scared by his sudden appearance that the smoke got caught in your throat. “Hi Mr. Aizawa, cough, I was just-, coUGH-, out here for uh, breather, COUGH, COUGH.” You wave him over, trying to play it off as if you just needed some space. But the residual smoke in your lungs made it hard to breathe.

He sighed, shaking his head disappointed. He’s seen this happen before, too many times with students to believe your words. He walks closer to you, still keeping a distance from you.

“Don’t give me that ‘breath of fresh air crap’. Why are you out here? Really?”

“I told you I came out here for some quiet,” You tried to redirect the conversation, “Bakugo was yelling at me for what happened this morning during training.” You say rolling your eyes at the memory. You recall the scruffy blonde yelling at you after a training incident. You were told to destroy your assigned training dummies. But that objective went out the window when you decided to use a new special move you came up with and accidentally knocked out all of yours and Bakugo’smachines in one go.

“Trust me if I didn't take a breather out here, we would be in Principle Nezu's office right now for fighting and property damage,” you said chuckling.

He sighed, looking back at you. "I'm sorry to hear that. Bakugo is hotheaded and I’ll talk to him about it afterward.. But you're not supposed to be out here. It's 1:56 am and you have to get up early in the morning for school."

“Yeah I know, well I should be heading to bed then…” This conversation has gone on for more than you would like, so it's time for you to roll up outta here! “Well, goodnight Mr. Aizawa I will see you in class tomorrow!” You start walking towards the door to leave, “I hope you have a good night and-”

Aizawa stops you by your shoulder, preventing you from leaving. “Hold it kid, you can't pull crap like that on me. Sit back down.” He says gesturing to a metal box next to him

Shit.

You sit your ass back down. You didn’t need to look up at his face to know that he was less than displeased with you. His eyes were practically burning into your head. You haven't seen this side of Aizawa before, and it was scary.

“Now, give me the pack.” he holds his hand out in front of you.

“What do you mean? Mr. Aizawa I-” You try to defend yourself but he cut you off not letting you speak.

“Stop talking hand them over.” You're caught, and you know it. “You're on thin ice kid,”

You fumble threw your pocket trying to find the box, you just finished the pack that night so you weren't worried about losing it. But what did make you worried was the look on Mr. Aizawa's disappointed glare was bad enough as you placed the red box into your teacher's hand.

He takes the box in his hand and places it in his pocket. He moves to lean back on the railing as he looks at you. “Y/n, you know we don’t tolerate this stuff here. I understand training can be tough but you can’t be pulling crap like this.”

“I know,” I say lowering my gaze.

“How long were you even out here?” He questions.

I recall the actions that led me here in my head: Well, I came out here after Bakugo and I had a screaming match, and that was at 10 I think… “Since 10 probably,”

“10...” He groaned and rubbed his nose. “Okay, okay, how do you get your hands on these?”

“I found them..” You lie through your teeth.

“You found them? Hm, you just found cigarettes lying around?” He questions unconvinced by your answer. “Seriously Y/n you’re not gonna get into any more trouble by being honest with me right now. Spill.”

“Well… I'm not lying, I did find them.” You admit shifting uncomfortably in your seat, “They're from my family... they leave the packs lying around and I just steal them when they're not looking.”

Aizawa was beginning to get rather annoyed. He was tired, as were most of the staff, and finding a student on the roof smoking was just the cherry on top. “You know that smoking on campus grounds is punishable by expulsion?” He stated, crossing his arms. A look of fear shot into your eyes. Expulsion?! "And if said family found out you were expelled for this, where would that leave you?"

“I…” you take a moment to think about how angry your father would be if he found out. You don't know what would be worse: if he found out about the stolen cigarettes or the fact that they got you expelled from the top hero school. “Well, I don’t know…”

“You don’t know…” He sounded angry, maybe a little concerned. An awkward silence fell over the two of you until Aizawa spoke again. “Listen, kid, your lucky it was me who found you. Any other teacher would have reported you on the spot. But, I for one, don’t think its fair for a student’s future to fall apart after one mistake. So, I'm giving you one chance to get clean.”

You look up at him with hopeful eyes, “Really?”

“Yeah, you’ve got potential as a hero and a good heart. I’d hate to see it go down the drain. You got one chance to do better or I won't help you the next time you get caught.” After a brief moment of silence, he speaks up again.

“You’ve got a good head on your shoulders kid, use it.”

By this time tears have been threatening to spill from your eyes. You have been feeling so many emotions at one time. You can’t help yourself as you dive to hug Mr. Aizawa.

He jumps a little, taken aback by the sudden affection. “T-thank you Mr. Aizawa,” You're now sobbing into his black shirt as relief washes over you.

He places one arm around you and the other on your head, gently patting it. “Don’t mention it kid..” You both just stay like that for a little bit, him holding you while petting your head. Whilst you calm yourself down. You pull yourself away from the hug wiping your tears, “Seriously though, don’t mention it. This could get both of us kicked out of U.A.” His tone turned more serious.

You let out a little giggle at the sudden change in tone, “Of course Sensei.”

He hums in response, “Tonight I expect you to hand me over any extra pack of these,” he says while tapping the cigarette box in his pocket, “And tomorrow we are going to recovery girl to help heal some of the damage done to your lungs. She owes me a favor so she’ll be discrete about it.”

You nod, “And from now on you have to be on your best behavior and not lie to me anymore, alright?”

“Yes, Sensei,”

“Alright, get back to your room and hand me over any extra packs, and then go to bed. You’ve already lost enough sleep as it is.”

More MHA/BHNA Stories *ੈ✩‧₊˚

More Aizawa Stories ೃ⁀➷

REMEMBER TO SMASH THAT LIKE BUTTON, OBLITERATE THAT FOLLOW BUTTON AND, REQUEST FOR A SHOUT-OUT IN MY NEXT VIDEO 🗣🗣🗣🔥🔥🔥