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shadowscommand · 4 months ago

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hiii👋👋👋 can i ask how u view the dynamics in the spetsnaz group? if its not too much just how everyone views each other:) im curious w the random implications of bale n rodion hooking up

ohhh i love thinking about the spetsnaz dynamics. Maybe too much. Im writing this in google docs like its a dissertation. BUT theres like 5 ways to think about this either with my brain or with my dick im going to use my brain first. AKA from a minimalshipping pov:

this is something ive said a bunch of times but i rly do think they get along very well. EVEN nikto-minotaur which is strained bc there is a clash of personalities. I wont get into like introvert vs extrovert nikto bc nikto is a special case every interaction with him is like on a day by day basis affected by his mood and just how hes feeling about someone/social interaction in general that week. his competitive nature + his toxic masculinity which was made worse by his torture especially makes minotaur like a target for him a little bit (as ive said in this post). minotaur rly is like a mirror that can make nikto really uncomfortable. And nikto makes Minotaur uncomfortable (as said here) bc he really understands nikto is struggling and he sees it but its a lot to put on someone. + just the chaotic and unpredictable nature of it is lowkey scary to maxim. i think overall their relationship is strained, not close, but also not actively hostile. Minotaur strikes me as someone who is very compassionate and emotionally pretty competent (not perfect but better than nikto for sure) who does his best to stay out of niktos way. They could easily commiserate about suffering from alcoholism but it would be the most base level acknowledgement of them both facing similar issues with drinking to cope with sadness (i imagine that while minotaur never pries in nikto harming himself he would speak up about nikto drinking. He knows what a slippery slope relapse can be (pragmatic as well bc a pissed off drunk nikto would not be any fun.)).

Rodion would fucking love minotaur though.. Hes fun and hes got a LOT of stories hes got cute kids hes very openmindedd he really does NOT judge (is nikto jealous? yes) is bale jealous? Yknow it does sort of suck to see your twin be the blossoming flower everyone flocks to. And this would be something hes felt since they were young (shameless plug) buuuttt. Bale has a presence in spetsnaz hes got a story to him and people Do really like him. So as an adult bale is very confident in his job and who he is so while theres some underlying tension there, overall the jealousy is very minimal. Also. Obviously. Theyve had some drama.

Minotaur (obviously, as he feels responsible) Really took it hard that bale “died.” i always wonder how this occurred to him. Like if he feels guilty bc it was his idea to join the military, or if it was some miscommunication during the mission which got bale hurt, Or the most dramatic and rly my favorite option: that it was some friendly fire that got bale downed. And when did he leave? Was he told bale wasnt moving and had died and he ran? Did they have to leave bale and the strain of that made him run? He didnt know bale was alive for 10 years he hid from his family for 10 years. That is some extreme trauma to go through and then find out the thing you were beating yourself up over wasnt even true. And bale has spent the past 10 years regaining his ability to walk + existing outside of what gives him the most confidence. All with his brother missing ! im sure theres some mannerisms and thought processes that they didnt see in the other before that they see now. But theyre twins. Twins r weird and insanely close. Their relationship is maturing into a beautifuw brotherhood.

And speaking of brotherhood. bale and nikto have a lot of respect for each other: theyve both been thru periods of recovery for massive injuries, theyre very skilled, & neither one of them are big on talking. I feel like they probably had a very short adjustment period of working with each other bc they just sort of clicked. Bale is like not scared of nikto at all (BUT HE IS AWARE HE CAN BE A DANGER). he can read his warning signs, he doesn't get in his way arbitrarily, and they have rly similar senses of humor. I think it helps as well that nikto doesnt see him as a threat bc while i do figure bale is more of the leader of spets on paper in the field, hes not like diehard intense about it he listens to ideas hes flexible uhh and he trusts niktos judgement. Any of nikto’s Weird Shit is just Nikto’s shit and bale doesnt gaf and nikto likes that. I DO ALSO THINK.. Bale knows the most about nikto’s past like hes been told things by kamarov that are important to know. And nikto likes that he never holds any of that against him and doesnt try to spread it. Hes a very respectful man so nikto respects him.

And it is a bit of like.. Like nikto isnt going to respect minotaur bc even tho hes a very large, skilled, grown man hes also not like hypermacho which nikto would just see as weakness. Whereas bale is very much A Guy like hes just a dude. AND RODION.. Rodion is a babbyy bro thats a baby on the field.. None of them Are babying him (well. Minotaur might a little bit. Hes lowkey motherly imo) but they are all very aware hes like. New to this more serious side of combat. And hes the medic ! he has field medic training ! that shit is stressful ! but he handles it and hes very excited for everything and driven. they literally would all love rodion.. Truly the sunshine of the group. Him and minotaur would click like nikto and bale click. they would hype each other up soo much they would have so much fun. AND BALE ?? rodion would be so excited to be working with bale. When he meets bale and bale is genuinely a cool guy, Actually straight up a cool guy, he would become even more enamored with him. Star struck for a long time before they become real friends where rodion doesnt put him on a pedestal.

And of course……. Nikto to rodion.. Like minotaur, rodion would initially be scared of nikto. Rodion really isnt small hes like 5’10 decently muscled but nikto is like fucking huge.. And he just Looks mean and he Would look meanly at rodion at the start like rodion is hyper. He talks a lot. Their first meeting (esp w how he would instantly get along super well with minotaur) nikto just thinks of him as a smaller, younger minotaur he would not be interested. AND hes a baby nikto doesnt want to be a fucking babysitter.. But rodion is very smart and much more laid back than he lets on he can really calm himself down to match nikto’s level. Little bit of a social chameleon bc hes a very charming guy. Rodion like. He Likes to be Liked. Its important to him to be fun and likeable. So he will act accordingly around nikto he’ll quickly learn his body language and how to read his expressions. I think even if they didnt fuck rodion would earn nikto’s respect and he would stop being scared of him relatively quickly.

But yknow. I want them to fuck. So. Uh rodion changing his energy level to match nikto would sort of like signal to nikto that he can hit. Genuinely that’s the entire crux of what gets them started. Rodion is smaller than him, more submissive socially than him, cute, womanly (in the eyes of a misogynist); nikto wants to fuck him. Its like dudes who think cashiers are hitting on them bc they smiled at him. Hes LUCKY that he also happens to be rodions type. Rodion likes a challenge and nikto is a CHALLENGGEEE. Nikto is so resistant and rodion is so hardheaded its the perfect recipe for a tumultuous relationship which makes it so rewarding for rodion to rein it in.

U might think like. Well. he likes bale. Bale is normal. It would be easier to fuck and try to date bale and it would but again rodion likes a challenge. Bale is just like.. Too casual about it all. + the element of hero worship i think changes how rodion feels about it like he just expects a bit of fun out of bale a little extra to their friendship and thats exactly what he gets. And it Is a lot of fun bale’s a good fuck and so is rodion they have good times. It just doesnt have the same fun drama as nikto… But. it would also be easy for them to treat fucking rodion as a competition which i dont think rodion would like bc its a bit disrespectful to him as a person. Like hes not a prize. And he doesn’t think of them as the same. I need 2 explore this in a fic its why i want to write some bale/rodion/nikto.

And minotaur, in the middle of all of this, is just worried for rodion overall. I Do Think he would be surprised bale gets involved at all bc its a very rocky situation between nr and it seems like more drama than bale would enjoy. But it is a little bit of bale’s own sense of dominance peeking thru like he just cant help it its a dude thing an alpha dog thing.. That minotaur just doesnt get into bc he has confidence in himself. And its kind of scary to minotaur that rodion gets in the middle of it. Its kind of scary to him that if nikto has a meltdown of some sort rodion will probably be the closest to him physically and could easily take the brunt of an attack that he rly wouldnt be ready for. Nikto genuinely trying to hurt rodion would be really bad. Hes very brutal. And minotaur keeps that in mind. But yknow so does bale he likes to keep an eye on it. Might as well get his dick sucked too. Maybe bent over or bend rodion over at the same time.

And also why i wanted to write more for beg! It kind of got away from me and its a lot to express. As seen in this probably very confusing ummmm 1,800+ word answer to an ask on tumblr dot com. I have a lot of thoughts thank u for asking me about them :)c i hope u were ready for all this + the additional reading. i think as a whole they work together great they all just yknow. Have their ups and downs. They work a lot of shit out together…. And then Nikto goes AWOL. planned or not

#call of duty modern warfare #call of duty headcanons #cod nikto #nikto cod #dmitry bale #maxim minotaur bale #nikodim rodionovich egorov #call of duty #niktodim #mwmp #asks #anon

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silverirony · 3 months ago

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tell me about the basalt basilicas of hauran and your beef with butler please im very curious to know this now.

!!!

so this has a lot to do with what a basilica is. there's the Christian basilica, which is just any church that was important/cool/old enough to get the title from the pope (there's around 2000 of those in the world), the oldest one is the basilica of st john lateran in Rome, aka the archbasilica. but basilica is also an architectural form, which essentially means usually rectangular building with one main nave and at least 2 side aisles and an apse. it's important that the nave is taller than the aisles and has windows in the clerestory, otherwise it's not a basilica (see diagram below, triforium is optional).

so, not every christian basilica is a basilica in the architectural sense. to put it simply:

a church where the nave and aisles are the same height -> ❌that's a hall church

a church where the nave is taller than the aisles but doesn't have windows -> ❌that's a pseudo-basilica

a church where the nave is taller and has windows -> ✔️that's a basilica!! yay!!

this is an important distinction because when archaeologists find ancient churches most of the time it's just foundations, so they decide if a church was a basilica based on how many aisles it had. and normally that's not a problem, because if your church is wide and tall and has multiple aisles, you need the windows in the clerestory an a gable roof, otherwise the construction won't construct properly. the thing is, that's most cases, not all.

ok now imagine you're howard crosby butler, it's 1905, you're an architect (so you know everything I just explained), and you just convinced your friend to sponsor your huge trip to syria. you get to syria, you do your little sketches, which, btw are the most beautiful drawings of this architecture ever created, I mean:

(they don't draw anything like this anymore fr)

and it's all well and good, until you get to southern Syria, particularly to the basalt plateau of Hauran (also partially north jordan), where suddenly the churches aren't churching. a normal basilica build from limestone or sandstone (image above), vs the basalt "basilica" (image below)

the first time i saw this i was like "wym 'basilica' this is clearly a hall church, was he stupid?" and there was no immediate explanation why he decided this was a basilica, and you can't do that sir ma'am, you have to show your thinking. it pissed me off so bad I dedicated like a chapter of my bachelor's thesis to this. so here's the thing:

usually a church of this size would need a clerestory and a gabled roof

that is because you can't cover a 10m-wide nave with a single slab of stone, because it will be too heavy and it will break under its own weight

UNLESS you're building stuff out of basalt, which is so dense and special and tough and beautiful that you can absolutely do that

so if you don't feel like building a a whole clerestory and then calculating the proper triangle for a roof, and have some basalt, you can just

slab

and when i went digging deeper i found this quote from butler himself:

Butler 1929, 17

anyway, so my beef with some random architect who's been dead for almost 100 slutty, slutty years, is 1. words have meanings, definitions even; 2. how do you have a whole ass degree in architecture and then name the architecture in question the wrong thing; 3. I realize this is because of the "3 aisles = basilica" tradition, but well maybe I'm pedantic and maybe it shouldn't be. maybe (I realize it's because basilica has a certain status and these churches did too, but like. we should invent separate names for them. maybe); 4. I had to dig for the basalt-roof slabs-no clerestory explanation, because it's not like butler himself ever explains any of this, I had to harass my geology professor; and 5. the plans are also wrong about the dimensions but we don't have time for this rn

the moral of this story is that it's always ethically and morally wrong to say that a hall church is a basilica, and that basalt is super cool and I love it. peace and harmony on planet earth

#sorry anon i realize i wrote a whole essay about this. and its not even all of it. sorry.#also i thought i lost this ask but no i started responding then forgot for like 3 weeks. sorry again.#hope this makes sense. if not i can explain further. if anyone wants to be subjected to that #archaeoposting #churchposting #ew.txt

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chemposting · 4 months ago

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randomly stumbled upon this blog. chem AND lifesteal posting? u are so cool. i have very very limited knowledge of chemistry (took ap chem lol. i thought it was really fun but nobody else understood me…) so like half of ur blog just flew over my head but this shit is so interesting. i’m so intrigued. so what’s ur favourite molecule. or idk. tell me things… i’m just a curious fella

HELLOW THANK YOU SO MUCH... mee?! im So Cool... chem poasting slash mandizo is cool... no... it cant Be....

I GOTTA SAY its pretty hard to pick a favurite molecule. every molecule is so swag in their own ways. but if I had to pick one (and this is quite relevant to your ask) it would be the Havoc Duo Molecule

(the woke mob calls it Zirconocene dichloride) they just let chemists make whatever nowadyas and its so awesome

ap chem... wow... not to dox myself but ive been in china my whole life so far but im very intrigued in various chemistry curricula all around the world. teaching something is just as cool to learning it to me. ap chem is basically first year undergraduate general chemistry. AS A SOLIDLY DESIGNED COURSE IT CERTAINLY DELIVERS. i just hope that it would introduce some preliminary organic chemistry knowledge. my wish list

ILL SHARE WITH YOU WHAT IVE BEEN WORKING ON AS OF LATE. as a sneak peak...

we dont always get what we want in life. sadly this is also the case for amides... amides are molecules that look like the above two. with an oxygen atom and a nitrogen atom bonding in a specific way. blue ball is Optional. anyways often times in organic synthesis we would reeeeally love to turn things that are attached to that nitrogen into other things. as shown in the above diagram! a more complete reaction scheme is as followed:

THIS UNFORTUNATELY THIS EASIER SAID THAN DONE. for various reasons, conversion rates of the original amide is usually straight garbage. its commonly around 50% with plentiful opportunities to go much lower to single digit or 0%. its a huge waste of resources, energy and time. QUITE AWESOMELY THOUGH, THE BELOW REACTION (which is used to make a precursor of Tamibarotene. tamibarotene haas been approved for leukemia treatment) , with equaimolar reactants, REACHES A CONVERSION RATE OF 92%:

this is quite Gobsmacking. so why would this be? we can actually investigate with fairly simple general chemistry knowledge. we have 5 reactions worth discussing here and Allow me to list them all.

Reaction (1) is the main reaction we care about. (2) and (3) are reactions involving the acid TfOH and amines which act as bases. (4) and (5) are reactions involving solid salts dissolving and precipitating. lets list the five reactions and their equilibrium constants here:

Assuming that solubilities of R1R2NH2TfO and R3NH3TfO are s1 and s2 (mol L^-1) and with some dope algebra:

we can see that the ratio of concentration of B (the amide we want) and A (the amide we want to turn into B) at equilibrium, which we will call r, is

and this is Directly linked to conversion rates of A because convertion rate of A is

and THIS IS SO AWESOME. i was really surprised that r would have such a simple form and that this formula which we derived with nothing but simple assumptions (were not even dealing with numbers here) and basic knowledge can explain so muchs. For example lets solve the stupidly high 92% mystery:

A high conversion rate means a higher value of r. Had side reactions (2) (3) (4) and (5) not have happened, we would have r = sqrt(K1) (this one is left for the reader to prove ... smirk). so what we are trying to find out here is when does the following inequality hold:

One solution would be that when

its just really awesome that we could have a solution with such amazing actual chemistry interpretations. And forr reasons that are a bit beyond the scope of this post, the molecules involved in that reaction which makes Me-Tamibarotene satisfies all of the above conditions (by a long shot). so Thtas why we were able to have such high yield in that specific reaction, and we can expect similarly satisfactory yields in other reactions that also clears the checklist!

#chemposting #too bad this didnt make it into the paper... GRRRR #there are other awesome implications of the formula we reached #but i really like how we were able to pull this formula basically out of thin air #its not dependent on any number that we have to actually and concretely measure out #yet so many experimental phenomena proves its correctness #SORRY THIS CHEMPOAST IS WAY TOO LONg i HOPE U LIKED IT #the formula has such a clean form as well. no crazy integrals or wahtever #you would expect that calculus would be need for some crazy predictive formula like this. BUT NO #such is the beauty of thermodynamics

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demadogs · 3 years ago

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heyy what are your thoughts on Mike's monologue? Do you think he was being honest or it was a half truth or something? I'm really curious abt what you think bc honestly I'm not sure myself

this might be long i havent dove into this scene in a while.

the short answer is i think it was a mix of some sad truths disguised as romance, things he believes she wants to hear (but is completely wrong), and just straight up lies. but the biggest thing is that what he thought she wanted to hear was what will told him in the van, unaware that those were wills feelings not els.

but before i even talk about it lets just LOOK at the scene. this is what every other romantic scene in the show has looked like:

and this was allegedly mike and el’s “most romantic scene”.

they are not happy here. this was right before mike said he loves her and right after. one of the biggest differences in this scene compared to the other ships is the fact that both of them we’re forced into this conversation. mike was NOT going to say any of this. will had to push him to continue. meanwhile el is physically restrained from responding to him. she was forced to listen to him and mike felt like he was forced to say it.

anyways now im gonna analyze the actual content of the monologue:

sad truths disguised as romance:

“i dont know how to live without you”

i think this is true and it could be a romantic line but it could also be really sad. it reminds me of when finn (or millie i dont remember) said that they were like a married couple with no option of divorce. i think what mike really meant by this is that hes scared to confront who he really is without el. he actually already did confront this version of himself after she and will moved. i think when he was without either of them he realized his true feelings and hated it and he just wants to go back to who he was before he figured it out.

“i feel like my life started that day i found you in the woods”

im not as confident in this one but it could honestly be extremely sad when looked at from a different lens. it was the first night after will went missing. it was the first time things in his life got weird and unexplainable. losing will and finding el is what led to all the supernatural trauma theyve been through. i dont think mike associates el with trauma but that night in the woods did change all of their lives forever and nothing has been normal since that night. when mike told will asking him to be his friend was the best thing hes ever done, thats said in a way that could not be interpreted any other way, especially not in any negative way. this can. (that being said im not negating how much mike genuinely does care about her and im not saying he wishes he never found her or anything like that).

then it gets so complicated because the only way mike knew how to reach her was through everything will said to him in the van, not knowing that everything will said was referring to HIS feelings, not els.

what mike thinks she wants to hear (based on what will said):

mike tells el “im afraid that one day you wont need me anymore” directly referring to when will told him that she (he) will always need him and then we see this shot.

a lot of people interpret this clip as will just being sad that mike loves her but i think here he might actually be realizing that mikes using his own feelings unknowingly to reach her and he feels guilty about it.

will also told mike that “you make her feel like shes not a mistake at all, like shes better for being different and that gives her the courage to fight on” which actually is not the case for el AT ALL. that was the entire reason for their fight in volume one. el told him “i am different i do not belong” and that he thinks shes a monster and thats why she doesnt love him. she doesnt wanna be loved for being different. but will made mike think she does. these are els reactions to when he brings up her powers:

“youre my superhero”

“you can move mountains, you can fly”

during the whole monologue shes crying but both times he brings up her powers she stops and just looks mad. she looks like she just realized something and shes not happy about it.

i think will completely unintentionally made mlvn so much worse with his veiled confession in the van.

just straight up lies:

“and i knew right then and there that i loved you” (referring to the very first moment he saw her in the woods.)

this is the biggest lie of the whole monologue and i dont always like to bring in social media and marketing to my analyses but when i watched this for the first time, the SECOND he said this i immediately thought of this tweet:

we also have proof in the show itself that he didnt feel this way. he brings her home because he just found a lost girl in the woods in the pouring rain. and then he and lucas and dustin immediately come up with a plan on how to get her back to wherever she came from so that the next day they can go back outside and find will.

“i love you on your bad days”

immediately debunked. mikes a fucking BITCH on her bad days. even will thinks so.

“i love you for exactly who you are”

he doesnt even talk about who she is??? at the beginning of the season we had that whole scene of nancy and jonathan talking about all the reasons they love each other and what does mike love about el? that shes a superhero?

and THEN after the monologue is over its not even mike who gives her the courage to fight on! ITS MAX!!! el doesnt have the power to move the vines until she sees max in trouble. and then later when shes reviving her and theres flashbacks of their moments together, specifically when she says “theres more to life than stupid boys” and “not hopper, not mike, you.” thats huge.

continuing with post-monologue volume 2, its so beyond weird that we dont see el speak a WORD to him after this enter speech. not even just after that speech, after she almost died.

if mlvn was meant to be why didnt they have a moment like this after she woke up? we dont even see her wake up. we dont even see them for two days!!!!

anyways that was a lot. i hope it all made sense. i think the purpose of the whole monologue was to show that even after mike says what she wanted to hear, shes still not happy with him. shes realized that that she is her own person and her own superhero. the duffers just made it excruciatingly complicated and i hope they do a good job explaining this scene in s5.

#byler #writing this felt like i was writing a whole ass APA format paper #stills #eden answers

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im-smart-i-swear · 2 years ago

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If funky guys had become paladins of voltron which one would be in which Lion?

back in the VERY early days of this whole au(like. buddys-name-was-still-ryou early) i wanted to base every clones personality/character on a diffrent lion.... but over time it slowly stopped fitting their personalities and i kinda abandoned the concept lol. though you can still see some remnants of that in . certain design choices...

going back to this concept after uhhh two years?? i think? was definetely interesting! all the characters changed WILDLY since then and i tried to re-assign the lions to fit the changes........ it was surprisingly hard

i couldnt for the life of me decide in a few cases, so instead im just gonna give the most suitable options lol

tashi & soup - im putting these two together beacuse- and i have NO IDEA how that would work- theyre copiloting the black lion! they function the best as a duo and separating them would NOT be a good idea in a situation as stressful and complicated as piloting voltron. they barely manage to keep everyone alive on a good day... also picking only one of the two as The Leader just feels wrong

buddy, ideally, would like to stay as FAR AWAY from voltron as psyhically possible, thank you very much- but nothing in this cruel world is ideal, so they get the red lion:) i actually have this whole story idea where basically stickbug ""goes rouge""(like. some sort of 'sleeper agent mode' left over by haggar gets activated by accident??) and runs away to do some evil shit so buddy goes after him(on a whim)(alone)(without telling the others) and while searching for him they bump into fUCKING VOLTRON- so they form a very uneasy truce until they find stick. and at some point buddy finds out he can pilot the red lion! its awful he hates it:/ he pilots anyway cause his loved one is in danger(this whole thing is way too complicated to talk about here lol)

i had A LOT of problems figuring out the last three..... they changed so much that i just cant rlly fit them into these categories anymore... but i tried!!

ORIGINALLY stickbug was supposed to be based on the green lion but he doesnt fit it as well anymore....... i think taks does pretty well tho! shes very bold and iquisitive and a pain in everyones ass<3 plus loves learning about diffrent planets' unique ecosystems n stuff. stick IS very curious and likes exploring so he still kinda fits? but hes not as forward as taks, so yeahhhh im very torn on this one

i have NO FUCKING CLUE what to do with blue. all three of em could propably fit there ngl....

yellow could either be taka or stickbug- taka is the youngest and the brightest, hes what brought all of them together in the first place(it takes a village to raise a child)....... buuuut hes not really a 'puts the needs of others above his own' kind of person? hes still a kid and NOT ready for that kind of responsibility. soup is an OBVIOUS choice here of course, but im not sure- honestly, the more i think about it, the more stickbug starts to feel like the best option here? ok hear me out: stickbug, for most of his life, had very little power over his life. even while with the funky guys(ESPECIALLY in the beggining, these bozos were dysfuctional as fuck) there were moments when the others would talk over him bc 'hes a kid', and even without that theres still his people pleasing problem wnich meant he often disregarded his own good to make other ppl content. so, taking this scrawny guy desperate for control over his life and putting him in the toughest, stongest, most resilient lion- basically i think he deserves to go a little apeshit. as a treat. let him wreck shit for once

honestly it kinda funny im stting here and calculating all of this like a mad man where IN THE ACTUAL SHOW the paladins switch the lions like pokemon cards

realistically speaking i think they would all trade and switch em a lot and then squabble over who gets to pilot yellow bc they ALL want to wreck shit sometimes:)

#thank you for asking!!#i know it took me a while to answer lol #but i did it!!! yippie!!!!#ask #my funky guys #i feel like i dont talk enough about how dysfunctional this family is sometimes...... they love each other and theyre working on it!! theyr #all trying!!#but after everything theyve been through OF COURSE theyre not doing well.....#no family is prefect and ESPECIALLY if they went through so much shit as these guys #i know i mostly talk about how wholesome and caring they all are(and they ARE) but that doesnt mean they dont have a lot of problems also #and thats okay. shit happens sometimes y'know? what matters is that they make the effort to change and grow #its messy and complicated and Not Fun sometimes tho- love is never easy.......#im propably going to go into more detail about the whole 'buddy teams up with voltron to get stickbug back' thing someday cause MAN i have #a ton of thoughts on that one #i dont have the energy to explain All That rn.........

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 4 years ago

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First request here! Im so excitedd lol 😆 may i request idia, cater, vil, deuce and azul (sep) with an s/o who knows nothing about technology? Like where they come from there are no videogames, no social media, no phones, etc. So naturally s/o is curious and asks the boys to help them learn more about it.

Curiouser and Curiouser...

Idia has no idea how you've even been ALIVE for this long without ANY tech whatsoever. (No anime? No video games? What madness is this?!) In fact, when you first tell him, he almost seems repulsed at the idea of your lifestyle before coming to NRC.

He makes it a personal mission to get you acquainted with all things tech, and takes great pride in doing so. Not only does his big brain come in handy, but he also gets to show off and help out his S/O at the same time. It's like killing three birds with one stone (... or getting a triple kill combo in a shoot'm up, in Idia's case).

He prioritizes showing you how to use touch screen devices and keyboards first, since those are relatively simple to grasp. Idia may be used to them, but he knows that you aren't, so he has to start small and build up in complexity.

As he teaches you, Idia comes to rediscover many of the things he once took for granted, like a phone camera's timer or how a fresh joystick makes satisfying clicks as it is maneuvered around. Seeing your face brighten with each new feature you learn helps Idia come to appreciate his tech--not to mention fall in love with you all over again.

Of course, Idia dedicates the most time to showing you how to play video games (since he wants to be able to play co-op and party games with you)! The controller's shape is unlike anything you've ever held before, so Idia has to take your hands in his to show you how to properly hold it. His hands are ice cold like the kiss of death itself, but they quickly warm up against you, much like his flaming hair and cheeks.

Cater's super sympathetic, cooing about how he feels bad for you! He practically puts his whole life on social media, so he can't imagine living any other way! The world just seems so much smaller without his phone in his hand--so how in the world must feel?

First thing's first! Before teaching you anything, Cater insists on taking a selfie. When you respond with a confused "what's a selfie and why are we taking one?", he gives a laugh and says it'll be a good way of documenting your tech journey. Not only that, but he wants to be your first (selfie)!

With Cater being... well, Cater, he's going to show you how to navigate Magicam ;9! He even helps you set up your own account, including your profile pic and description (which tags his account, declaring Cater as your boyfriend to the public~... while his description declares you as his S/O to his thousands of followers).

He also teaches you about what the best angles and lighting are for pics! Cater points out the various filters and other editing tools at your disposal, his smiling face hovering close to yours as he swipes through your options--and when he gives you that tender sideways glance, you 100% understand why people want to capture moments forever in photos.

You quickly grasp using a touch screen keyboard, but whenever you text him, he litters his responses with emojis--maybe to better express his feelings for you, maybe to just mess with you. Sometimes he just straight up sends nothing but emojis to see if you can decipher his message! But no matter what his motive is, those colorful texts spark joy in you every time you get a notification.

Certainly, it’s unusual that you’ve never come by modern technology before, but Vil considers himself well-equipped to teach you the ins and outs of it. There’s nothing wrong with your roots, but there’s also nothing wrong with expanding your horizons, either!

His approach is very “hands on”. Vil hands you a device and, after giving you a basic rundown of its functions, allows you to explore it. The first of Vil’s many tests is sitting down for a movie together (so you can learn the remote control’s buttons). You watch, totally mesmerized, as another Vil appears on the TV. No matter where you stop or start, he always looks so beautiful--both in person and on the screen. Vil catches you staring and smirks, the lights from the movie making him appear all the more dazzling.

Vil takes on the role of a strict and somewhat overprotective guardian as he guides you through the cesspit of social media. As a celebrity, he’s big on internet etiquette and watching what he says online, so he passes on that knowledge to you. No sharing of personal details, block what makes you uncomfortable, etc. (After all, he wants his beloved to be safe online!)

While Vil wants you to have fun online, he also reminds you to not become too immersed in social media--it’s only meant to be a temporary escape. Stay too long, and you might get wrapped up in FOMO, rather than enjoying what you already have.

Vil can’t just go around parading that he’s spoken for--it would unnecessarily expose you to the public eye, and could potentially put you in danger, so he asks that you don’t @ him on socials. That’s just the price he has to pay for his star status--besides, you’ll always have him to yourself in private, right?

While Deuce is initially surprised, he's very understanding of your situation! He knows that everyone comes from different circumstances, and he doesn't let that cloud his judgement of others or of their abilities much. You’ve looked past Deuce’s old self, so he’s able to look past your own oddities!

He worries about being an adequate tutor for you, since he isn't exactly the best student himself. Just like he feared, Deuce ends up being not the best at explaining things, even the simplest of commands. He just kind of... does something, then looks at you expectantly to copy him. (B-But hey, he’s trying!)

As you slowly start to get the hang of it, Deuce gets super excited and cheers you on! A slap on your shoulder or back, a high-five, a fist bump... It’s really cute how animated he gets with your steady progress, and it motivates you to keep improving!

When it comes to helping you set up your phone, Deuce gets oddly fidgety. Then, mid-lesson, he blurts out (with a beet red face) that he’d like to have your number so you can talk, even if you can’t see each other! Deuce sighs with relief when you give him the okay--and practically drops your phone five times while he nervously punches his number in and sends a text to himself to confirm.

If your devices ever get broken, Deuce lets you know you can bring them to him for a quick fix! At first, you’re super impressed by his technical prowess--but then you realize when Deuce says he’ll “fix” something, he actually means he’ll kick, punch, and chuck your device at the wall until it works again. (And surprisingly? It works most of the time.)

Azul understands your plight, though to a lesser degree. Back when he lived in the Coral Sea, he was limited in the technologies he could access, simply because some of them did not work in the waters. Now, he’s very comfortable with using land tech and scamming tutoring others--so leave it to him to teach you everything you need to know!

You report to Azul’s office after the usual hours of operation and sit next to him as he demonstrates the various tools of his trade on a laptop. This spreadsheet program to automatically calculate net gains and losses, what’s left in their stock, total and individual sales... this search engine to do market research... this custom website for sharing the lounge’s menu... It really makes you appreciate how hard-working and dedicated Azul is!

He generally focuses on showcasing the practical applications of technology, like setting alarms and timers, and typing down important events on a phone. Azul’s sure that you’ll find them useful in your daily life, from waking up on time for classes to setting aside weekends for your dates.

He does eventually introduce you to Magicam (if only to have you follow the Mostro Lounge’s page), as well as to Kelp, some underwater restaurant review site. With (fake) teary eyes, Azul begs for you to write a review (or two, or three, or ten) to help boost the lounge’s overall star rating--and in return, he’ll reward you with a romantic candlelit dinner with all your favorite foods~

As a special gift, Azul surprises you with a pair of blue light blocking glasses! He explains that being on a screen for too long can damage your eyes, so it’s best to take precautions to protect them. Azul slips your new glasses on for you, fingers lingering on your cheeks and cupping your face--holding his whole world in his hands.

#twst x reader #Azul Ashengrotto #Azul Ashengrotto x Reader #Vil Schoenheit #twisted wonderland headcanons #twst #twisted wonderland #disney twisted wonderland #Vil Schoenheit x Reader #Cater Diamond #Cater Diamond x Reader #Idia Shroud x Reader #Idia Shroud #Deuce Spade #Deuce Spade x Reader #curiouser and curiouser #self insert #Reader

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gb-patch · 4 years ago

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Ask Answers: July 10th

I really let asks get away from me lately. I was super focused on working on that Patreon Moment. With that done I can finally think about doing other things, so here’s a new collection of answers!

Thank you for sending in questions everyone ^^.

For the new Patreon moment, will you be able to reference it in step 4? Or just like a tiny nod to it if you pick certain choices?

There won’t be. I’m sorry if you were hoping for that! The Patreon moment is meant to be entirely optional, it’s not something that gets you extra content in the main game.

Is the new CG artist the main one now? :0 I’ve noticed theres been a difference in the art style recently. Is the old CG artist still going to make art for the game? :0

The original artist still makes CGs for the game sometimes, but he mainly focuses on character sprites.

Are you going to put the NSFW our life moment on a website other than patreon? I would love to get it but I can't use patreon atm.

I don’t know. I'm afraid we can't release the Patreon Moment on a normal game storefront because we can't mix 18+ content with our family friendly game. If there's some other place similar to Patreon where it's not the normal type of full-scale public content releases we'd consider using that, but I’m not sure if there is another site that’s better than Patreon in that regard. I'm sorry.

Out of curiosity, in all of your games so far, which characters in each were the most fun to write? They obviously don't have to be your favorite characters!

Buffalo Seer in AFA, really everyone in XOD/XOBD is pretty equally entertaining to write, The Guide in LoV, and Cove in OL!

idk if you accept "personal" questions, but is there anything you've been watching/ listening to lately

Mostly, I’ve been watching/listening to Authortube videos as of late! It’s people who talk generally about the process of how books become traditionally published and/or share their own experience as they attempt to be published. I don’t have an interest in writing normal text based books, but it’s really interesting to hear about that world. I’m listening to a video about royalties right now as I answer these asks.

Will one of the desserts we get to pick be fudge? That'd be such a cute reference!

Haha, yeah, it should. Unless I completely blank on it and forget when trying to include the various referential food options.

I don't know if this has been asked previously but what would be the approximate heights for the presets MC can choose from Step 2 ~ 4? Are there any measurement you had in mind? Sorry if I didn't make myself clear kk I've been struggling with my English lately 💀

I don’t know, ahah. I didn’t have any numbers in mind for that. So it’s whatever you imagine it is!

I noticed a bug with the Patreon moment when it comes to what your character wears. When Jamie and Cove are kissing while my character only had dresses selected, I had both the option to remove the dress or to remove the shirt... Picking one of the options to interact with Cove, after he removed his shirt, it had Jamie remove their shirt followed by ther pants despite only having dresses picked.

Thank you for reporting ^^

I keep refreshing steam to see when the new doc for xobd will be released. I noticed you haven't posted anything about it in quite some time. Would it be possible to ask about a timeline/potential date? (If it's even this year—) I know you and your team are probably working super hard, I'm just super curious! ~Thank you!~

There are more stories done, I just haven’t gotten around to publicly releasing them. Hopefully I will have a chance to spend the time on that sooner rather than later!

hello!! i’m not sure if it’s an update but i’ve just replayed our life and at the end i can’t propose to cove anymore? :(( i’ve actually tried playing twice but the options are not there anymore, did you guys remove the options? i’m sorry if you’ve answered this before!! thank you and have a good one :)

I’m afraid things haven’t been changed or removed, so I think you might’ve accidentally picked the wrong things somewhere along the way and locked yourself out of being able to propose by mistake. Sometimes you meant to say you want to get married but instead you mis-click and have it so the MC isn’t thinking about marriage or something. All I can suggest is starting from the beginning of Step 3 and making sure to follow the steps listed in the FAQ. I’m sorry for that.

Did yall remove some of the options for when youre making out with Cove in the charity moment? I could've sworn you could grab his bonkadonk and its not there anymore

This is the same situation as the above. We didn’t remove things and you’re not wrong that there are sometimes those options. But there are various choices you have to make to get those options and it sounds like you accidentally missed something. If your relationship isn’t long-term, you can’t do it for example.

HI IM SO EXCITED I CAN FINALLY GET THE STEP 3 DLC

Thank you for getting it!

Is Shiloh super totally straight bc I’m very gay and a huge Shiloh fan, would my man make an exception?😩

Sadly, he is one of our super straight characters. I’m sorry.

Hi, I have a very dumb question. In Step 2 does Cove not wanna share his drink with us at the mall (or rather why he stops drinking it) because it's an indirect kiss? Or is it like ...weird to him to share? Because if I remember right he eats off our spoon in the birthday scene right?

Yeah, he’s awkward about it because he likes the MC and it feels very personal to share a straw with his crush.

Hi! If you don't mind me asking, who is the artist for OL2? Their style is so pretty!

Thank you for saying so! This is her Twitter- https://twitter.com/redridingheart

Do Beginnings & Always and Now & Forever exist in the same universe?

Yep! XOXO Droplets also exists in the same universe. It’s one big GB Patch world, haha.

Do Pran's parents regret the way they raised him? Do they feel ashamed of it?

No. They’re the type of people best cut out because they’re not gonna change. Which is why Pran does go very limited contact when he’s an adult.

Hi! I just wrapped up my second playthrough of Our Life, and I absolutely adore it, but I had a question. I went to the gallery and found I was missing 2 CGS (specifically Step 1-3 and 2-3) and I had no clue where they would've shown up. Which moments are those found in?

You get it by telling Cove about his dad offering you money to be his friend in Step 1 and Step 2. You can’t get both in one playthrough, since you can only tell Cove the truth once. I’m really glad you liked it!

Hi hi! Please, how tall is Baxter and Derek? Love the game so much and I can't wait to see more!

I don’t know, aha. I think Baxter was around 5′10 and Derek was like 5′8/5′9, maybe. I really am not one who has specific heights for things in mind.

is adult cove a bottom, top, or switch?

A switch, though would choose the top if he had to pick.

I was wondering if there is a way to transfer save data? Even if through the game files. I wanted to be able to transfer my save data from my desktop over to my laptop so that I could continue playing right where I left off from but I'm not entirely sure how to go about that.

If you save the save folder/persistent data of the game from your desktop and put it into the game folder on your other device, that could work.

Hi! Is it possible for us to know the date when our life: now and forever comes out on steam? Sorry if you've mentioned it before but I haven't seen it and I'm looking foward to that happening and just wanted to know :)

It’s gonna be a long time, I’m afraid. There’s no estimate right now.

I started playing Our Life with my sister a while ago, and I think you guys should know that we discovered your secret. >:)

L from death note and Cove are clearly the same person, and this whole game is just an origin story!!

I’ve never seen that show so I’m sorry to say I don’t understand the connection/reference you’re trying to make. I’m pretty out of the loop when it comes to media. I don’t watch movies or TV.

Will OL2 have options for disabled MCs?

I understand if it's too complicated, just curious

Unfortunately, it’s not really something we have a plan for. We couldn’t finish the game if we tried to include every disability and have it be meaningful. It’d just be too much content to create. But if we decide to only include a few, how would we choose which disabilities get to be represented and which are left out? I don’t know. It’ll probably have to be something we don’t include as an option again, sadly. I’m sorry.

playing our life > anything else

Haha, I’m glad you’re enjoying it.

Honestly, I would like to thank Our Life for helping me come to terms with my sexuality. Before, I never would've actually thought that it was possible to like boys romantically and still be asexual. Almost all of the BL visual novels I've read had unskippable sexual content in them and it honestly just didn't click with what I feel. I'm glad I found Our Life. I love the game, the developers, and this fandom so much. Now, I can safely come out as homoromantic AND asexual (at least anonymously here anyway; my parents are still huge homophobes 😂).

Aw, it’s great to hear you felt comfortable being yourself in the game! That’s wonderful. I’m really sorry about your parents, though.

Will the demo for OL2 be on android? Really not sure if I could wait any longer than I have to aha

Yeah, it’ll be available for Android once we eventually release a demo!

Do all these reveals perhaps mean development is progressing ahead of schedule? Please let that be the case I'm already obsessed with Qiu

No, sorry, aha. Art comes along much faster than script/programming-work for us. It’s gonna be a long time before the game is a finished thing you can actually play. But at least we can look at the beautiful images.

Hey! First of all I wanna say I reallllllyyyyy loooovvveeee Our Life and XOXO Droplets! I have over 300 hours of playtime on Our Life… Anyways, I was just wondering, are the Derek and Baxter DLCs going to come out at the same time? If not, which one do you plan to release first? :3

They will come out separately and Derek will be first! Glad you like the game.

I keep replaying Our Life to get every possible iteration and I am loving it <3 I was wondering if Cove gets locked out of his confession because MC was talking to Lee, would it be possible to confess to him in step 4?

Yeah, you can avoid the confession in Step 3 and then get it in Step 4.

Hi, my Cove wears bracelets through step 2 and 3 but I still don't get an option to give him a bracelet? I didn't even know that was possible until I seen someone else ask about it lol

Hm, did you use the Cove creator? Maybe there’s a bug where using the creator to add bracelets doesn’t fulfill the requirement to give Cove a bracelet in Step 3.

Wait, I'm dense, when does Baxter appear in step 2? Is it from big park firework? I feel so bad since i really love Baxter and waiting to buy his dlc.

It’s in the Soiree Moment. You have to be just friends with Cove, indifferent, or crushing but not ask Cove to the dance at all. Then while there you can find someone new to dance with. But if you bring Cove to the dance while crushing, the MC won’t wanna dance with anyone else so you can’t get the scene.

In step 2 when we go to the soiree I made my mc go alone and baxter chooses the mc to dance, i'm curious, why did he pick the mc? sorry if this has been asked before!

Because the MC looked to be around his age, seemed to also be searching for a partner, and had nice legs. A perfect option for him.

I read some of the FAQs, and I saw that we could tell Baxter about the condo that he rented there was previously the mean old grandparents. how do we get the mc to tell him that?

It happens in the DLC Moment “Late Shift”. If you don’t have a job you instead get a longer scene with Baxter.

I don’t know if you’ve addressed this or not, but are you planning on paying voice actors for our life: now and forever?

Yeah, we pay our VAs in all our projects.

hey can i ask how you did the moments thing in ol? im trying to get into making visual novels and while im VERY sure its out of my comfort zone and all that atm i kinda wanna know just for the future, bc im p sure it would work well for something i wanna do :O but its also fine if you cant say for other reasons :>

I’m afraid I’m not sure what you mean. Are you asking how we programmed the screen or something script related? Adding Moments like that is pretty straightforward, though. You just have buttons that open to different labels and then the scripts are essentially individual short stories/vignettes. Good luck with your VN!

Since Autumn becomes gender fluid later in the game, will there be a character who remains as he/him to romance in game?

OL1 has the he/him LIs, OL2 is all about other genders.

I don't want to impose on your creative plans, but a parrot could possibly make a good pet in an OL-type game? They're pretty long-lived and likely to still be thriving by the end even if the MC got them back in step 1.

I do appreciate the suggestion, but I’m afraid it’s not likely going to happen. I understand there are technically some animals that could theoretically live long enough to last the whole game that or we could have the MC only get a pet after some years have already passed. But the many things that would have to be considered/accommodated for makes it just something we probably can’t manage adding. I’m sorry.

As time passes will we be able to see Qiu and Tamarack's other stage arts as well?

They are both so cute i can't wait to be friends with them!

Yeah, we’ll show content from other Steps in the future. It’ll be a little while from now, though.

Can you date Cove and still have your family comfort you in the car?

You can’t get Cove’s Step 3 confession scene if you have the family comfort you in the car. But that’s not the only way to date him. You can get together with him earlier in the game or later on in Step 4.

Is Mc always going to be the one walking down the aisle or could Cove do it? Also could you choose to have one of your moms walk you?

No. Cove wouldn’t want to walk down the aisle like that and the MC automatically respects that. And the MC also gets to have their preferences respected, so it’s up to you whether they want to do an aisle walk or not. You also can pick who, if anyone, walks with you.

Once step 4 is out, will you be able to go the whole game on crush/love without either of you confessing?

Yes, as long as you tell the game you don’t want to progress the relationship. Even in Step 4 it won’t force you to officially get together.

Howdy, so in Step 4, there will be any Romance with Derek that is not part of any dlc?

He’s only a friend unless you get his romance story.

Will the step 4 in OL2 be one big step or are you considering moments?

Step 4 is just an epilogue in both games.

hi kind of a weird question but!! we know tht cliff doesn't start dating again but. wht abt flings? like does he ever do 1 night stands or anything? thank u!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nope. Cliff has a very small interest in sex. If he’s not in a real relationship with a partner he’s crazy about it simply isn’t something he feels a need for, so one night stands wouldn’t even cross his mind.

sorry if you've already answered this, but i was wondering if there were plans for there to be bonus love interests in OL2 like how we have derek and baxter in OL1.

Maybe! There are side characters who could be given romance stories, but whether or not it will happen depends on funding and how long everything else takes to finish.

I don't know if i'm allowed to ask about ol2 here yet, if not u can ignore this or answer it later. My question is can you date one of them and be good friends with the other? I don't want to be strangers with the other bcs i love them both a lot :<

Yes you can!

what patreon level do i have to be to unlock the nsfw moment? im on the $5 one right now, will that give me access to the moment, or just access to the moment progress?

That’ll give you access! Tier 2 and anything higher allows the player to download it.

#our life #ask #gb patch #gb patch games #all projects #Our Life Beginnings & Always #Our Life: Now & Forever

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starglitterz · 3 years ago

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super starglitterz survey ☆ !! results

— thank u all for helping me & filling up the survey ! here's a summarised ver of the results in case you were curious :) also i'll be responding to the messages for the open-ended qs in the rbs of this post ^^

1. which series should i publish first? (all fem!reader)

incandescent - actor au, various charas x reader, mystery = 19

irresistible - spy au, scaramouche x reader = 17

serendipity - cynosure spinoff, coffeeshop au = 14

sugar baby - childe x reader, socialite au = 10

incandescent will be published first! >:) (also it deals w some topics that [i think] are slightly darker than normal since it is a mystery, but the specifics will be mentioned in the masterlist post.)

2. which fic should i publish first? (all gn!reader [so far])

you know you love me - diluc + scara + childe, suggestive = 22

the perfect valentines date (gets ruined?!) - ayato fluff = 12

忘れないで / don't forget me - xiao angst = 10

what is love? a weakness. - xiao angst = 8

my muse - kazuha fluff = 6

you know you love me will be published first! yall are down bad,,, caught in 4k 📸 HAHAHA also which one of u put the option that i specifically said not to choose 🤬 /lh

3. who would you like to see me write more for?

xiao = 9

ayato = 9

kazuha = 8

genshin women (specifically ayaka, ei, eula, ningguang, shinobu, sucrose, xinyan, yelan) = 8

albedo = 7

scaramouche = 7

thoma = 7

diluc = 6

other (dainsleif, gorou, venti, zhongli) = 5

genshin women (general) = 4

kaeya = 4

beidou = 3

childe = 3

i'll take note of this :D !! btw for characters which only got one or two votes each i combined them here so it's easier to see. also @ the person who put 'my husband' i'm so sorry but this is an anonymous survey HAHAHA idk who you are 😭 and for everyone who said they're ald satisfied i'm very happy to hear that :] !! <3

4. which tropes would you like to see me write? (au = alternate universe)

actor au = 2

angst = 2

childhood friends to lovers = 3

enemies to lovers = 5

fake dating au = 4

fluff = 3

historical au = 2

idol au = 3

modern au = 5

mutual pining = 2

reincarnation au = 3

roommates au = 3

royal au = 4

soulmate au = 2

other (confident mcs, death game au, domestic fluff, exes to lovers, forbidden love, hero/villain, hurt/comfort, mafia au, major character death, meet cute, neighbour au, smau, spy au, streamer au) = 14

yooo these are all so cute!! i do have a lot of ideas for these hehe >:) also thank you so much to everyone who said they don't mind bc they like my writing alrdy 😭💗 that's so sweet of u omfg i WILL literally cry /pos

5. should we hang out?

YESSSS WHENS THE DATE = 48

isnt this form about your fics wtf = 9

NO WAY id rather spontaneously combust = 1

HELPWAKJDSKJ yes let's all meet up at hoyoverse headquarters and storm them with pitchforks and torches to forcefully get every 5 star we want,,, we can go to a cafe after 🥰 ALSO yes this form was meant to be abt my fics but i thought it would be funny to ask something like this

6. confess your undying love or hatred to me <333 !! (aka pls talk to me im lonely)

i'll be posting the replies to this in rbs of this post with an ss of the messages and then my answers ^_^ because your replies were so cute ueueue i couldn't not reply AHAHA <3333

thank you for taking part in the first ever blog survey ! i appreciate it tons & it def helped me decide what to write more of in future :) <3

#✨️ — quill screaming !#🗺️ — navigation !

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ddarker-dreams · 5 years ago

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In Your Eyes. Yan Izaya x Reader [COMM]

warnings: izaya orihara counts as a warning if im being honest. dude’s a jerk. word count: 3k.

7:12 PM.

This isn’t the time of day that Izaya would normally close his services. Not when most of his clientele operate under the cover of night, crawling out from their day jobs and towards him. Izaya’s second monitor is a testimony to that. Message after message flooding in, notifications going ignored after a brief glance. The inquiries have a wide range. From a businessman wanting to know if the wife in his loveless marriage is cheating on him as he suspects, to the yakuza seeking information on a rival group that has been infringing on their territory. These people, deep as their pockets may be, occupy an insignificant role at the time.

Izaya’s eyes flicker to the live feed coming in from outside his apartment. One sight in particular catches his attention, his lips quirking into a self-satisfied smirk. He stands from the leather chair behind his desk, stretches, and makes for the kitchenette. There’s a spring in his every step as he walks, fingers running over a variety of untouched teas. Earl grey, matcha, chamomile. Chamomile might be best here, he thinks. Izaya busies himself with boiling the appropriate amount of water. Any second now, he just needs to be patient…

There’s a tentative knock on his door.

Izaya already anticipated having a most prized visitor paying him a visit. The door was unlocked in advance, but the excitement in his veins is making it difficult to decide on what approach to use. Calling over to come in, or answering the door himself…? He decides on the latter. Playing the indifferent game is growing tiresome. When he swings the door wide open, Izaya’s greeted by the sight of you. You must not have been expecting such a swift response, as a cute gasp leaves your lips. Ah, how endearing a sight.

Not one to stand in silence for long, he extends an enthusiastic greeting. “Ah, [First]-chan, what a lovely surprise. Come in, come in.”

You do as he instructs, an uncertain smile on your face. He notes how you scrutinize your surroundings. Eyes shifting to every wall, your posture remaining stiff as you remain focused on nothing in particular. After a moment of deliberation, your attention returns to him, and you bow your head.

“I hope I’m not intruding,” you let out a strained laugh, fixating on the soles of your shoes. “I’m sure you must be really busy, but, uh… I had some stuff I wanted to discuss. With you, that is.”

“You’re in luck then, as I’m not doing anything at the moment,” Izaya pauses at the high pitched sound that signifies his water is done boiling. From how easily startled you are by the noise, he almost wants to tease you. Not yet, he decides. There’ll be time for that later. “Would you like some tea?” You nod your head. “If it isn’t any trouble.”

He takes this time to recall the cryptic text message you sent him earlier. How much self restraint it took not to respond -- for the greater good, he reminds himself -- the contents catching his interest. You’ve been remaining purposefully vague. Is it to tantalize him? Keep him in the dark for some unknown reason? How interesting, the myriad of possibilities you bring to the table! Izaya’s own theories are plentiful. Hearing it from you beats anything his own imagination could concoct. It was a gamble that you’d actually come by today since he never responded, a test to see just how important this discussion is to you.

It must be vital if you took the train from Ikebukuro to Shinjuku to get here, as he’s aware you have classes tomorrow morning. The day after that is clear of any university activities if memory serves. This further proves the point to Izaya that whatever it is on your mind must be taking high priority. How his heart flutters at the thought, anticipation rising as he whips together the tea. Humans once again exercise their adaptability, moving along in new directions, with just a tiny push from him.

When he returns, cups of steaming tea in hand, you’ve already made yourself comfortable on his couch. Your legs crossed, hands clasping together on top of your lap. Izaya’s oncoming set up footsteps must not have been enough to alert you to his presence, so he clears his throat. Just like you did before, you startle, jumping in place. Izaya tuts at your reaction.

“It’s not good to keep zoning out like this, [First]-chan. What if you trip and hurt yourself on the way home? Now, I can’t be having that.” He teases while handing you your teacup. You wear a sheepish smile on your face, cheeks turning a rosy hue from his teasing. This might be the first time he’s ever seen you this out of it. Upon closer inspection, there are bags underneath your eyes, and your overall reaction time is sluggish. Hm…

Izaya takes a set beside you, likely closer than he needs to be, but you never protest. A loud sigh leaves your lips as you sink into his couch. “I sent you a text earlier, but I don’t think you ever saw it.”

He nods his head in confirmation. The chamomile seems to be working its wonders already, your shoulders slumping down further. Easing you up in his presence has never been a simple task.

“I’ve been thinking a lot recently,” you take another sip, wincing at how the hot liquid burns as it travels down your throat, “What I realized is that, maybe I do rely on others too much. When Miki went missing earlier this year, you said something similar, didn’t you? That there was a lot I couldn’t do. At the time, I didn’t want to believe you. I still don’t know if I do. So that’s why I wanted to ask if you still think that of me.”

So that’s what is haunting your mind? A budding identity crisis? He wasn’t expecting something as ordinary as this, feeling almost taken aback that you’d come to him on the topic. Maybe it’s hypocritical of him to think that way. He often finds himself thinking back to the first time you showed up at his office, replaying your words and expressions in his mind like a projector. It’s unlike Izaya Orihara to be a sentimental person, yet he recalls your first meeting with immense fondness.

- - -

Namie had almost dismissed you. She informed Izaya that there was no practical way you could afford these services, and that taking your appointment would be a waste of time for them both. A standard broke college student isn’t worth all the effort. And on a regular day, he would’ve been inclined to agree. Maybe it had been the boredom, as nothing of interest was brewing in Ikebukuro at the time. Whatever the reason, in retrospect, he’s grateful for the chance encounter.

“A missing person’s case?” Izaya glances down at the coffee table, where you’ve laid out numerous personal pictures. All featuring the same girl -- Yamato Miki -- who you’ve come here today to seek help for. The job feels familiar, while simultaneously being unlike anything he’s been asked for at the same time. Information for the whereabouts of unsavory folk isn’t a rare request. This falls into a different category. You’re not asking out of ill intent, or he would’ve picked up on that by now. You weren’t lying when you said you were worried about the wellbeing of your friend.

His eyes return to you shifting in your seat. “I’m curious. Why not go to the police about this instead of me?”

From how your nostrils flare, he can piece it together before you even verbalize a response. This is the first question of his to earn such a blatant reaction. Everything prior, you had responded to the best of your ability, trying to keep your emotions in check. You steady yourself with a deep breath.

“I’d gone plenty of times, and none of them seemed to care in the slightest! Miki… she has a bit of a record, you see. Nothing serious, she wouldn’t ever hurt anyone, just stuff haunting her from her teenage years,” your gaze lowers, fists clenching by your side. “Since she used to run away from home a lot, they think it’s something like that.”

Izaya sees the pieces of this puzzle falling into place. It’s been about ten minutes since you came in, explaining your story, and his interest is starting to wane. There’s nothing that sticks out to him as unique. Maybe giving you the time of day was a mistake after all, like Namie suggested. Still, the question remains, why go to him specifically? You, a seemingly upstanding citizen, must surely have better options.

He’ll entertain this charade a tad longer. It’s not like he has anything better to do.

“It’s not unreasonable to think that,” Izaya can’t help but agree with what the police had told you. The change in your demeanor is subtle, former timidity melting away. Greedy as it might be, he wants to see more of this unsightly side of you. So he continues prodding without relent. “People with troubled pasts such as your friend have next to impossible odds to overcome.”

Your jaw’s clenching, he can see the imprints of how hard your fingernails dig into the palm of your hands. It’s simple to play someone like you to his own tune, he muses. Izaya just about had his fill of this. Maybe he’ll put a last nail in the coffin for good measure. Will you curse at him? Explode and yell? Break down crying? Storm off without a word?

“Chances are, she got in way over her head, and is currently laying dead in an alley somewhere. Or maybe she is somehow alive! In that case, what will you do then? If she couldn’t rely on you, her supposedly closest friend, why do you think that is? She either doesn’t trust you as much as you thought, or was taking advantage of your kindness all along.” Izaya can’t help the smile that curls onto his lips. Now that’s the look of despair he wanted! Being confronted with a fate you knew all along, and yet tried so hard to ignore. Only to fail, to be drawn into a vulnerable position of reality--

“So what?” The tone of your voice is eerily collected. You take a deep breath, glassy eyes refusing to break contact with his own, a sense of resolve keeping you in tact. Izaya tilts his head at this conjecture, as if to invite you to elaborate further.

“So what if she might be as bad as you say she is? Miki is my friend. I don’t care for some arbitrary method of judging people based only on possibilities. I’ll see the truth for my own eyes and decide myself.”

Well… to be honest, he was expecting an entirely different reaction. For you to scold someone like him is borderline laughable, yet here you are, doing just that. So why does he find himself even more drawn to you than before? There’s been passion ignited inside you by his own hands, social etiquette thrown to the wayside. Instead of letting this newly lit fire run rampant, you control the flame, refusing to burn as he intended you to. Izaya Orihara has never been one to back down from a challenge. Maybe this isn’t a waste of time after all.

Izaya leans in, resting his temple on his fist. “Pray tell, [First]-chan, what would you do in the event that I’m right? And your precious friend is involved with stuff she shouldn’t be?”

“I’ll give her a good wakeup slap,” you place a finger to your cheek, considering the proposition. “Then chew her out for making me worry as much as she has. In the end, I want her to know that she can come to me with anything, even the worst she has to offer. That’s what friends are for.”

A mindset like this is idealistic to say the least. Optimism has never been a field Izaya has excelled in, as he bases things on concrete reality. Is that even the correct label for your way of thinking, he wonders? You’re not ignoring the possible truth, making excuses for her, or even considering enabling her poor behavior. No, it’s a strikingly unusual approach, that takes far more patience than most people have to offer. The shift in outward demeanor from soft-spoken to this unrivaled confidence backs it up further.

Izaya wants to know more about you. To peer behind the curtain that is your mind, poking and prodding at everything within reach. Seeing how much you can withstand before falling apart at his hands. It looks like you were wrong Namie, he thinks. This is turning out to be interesting.

“If that’s the case, I’ll lend you my help.”

You blink. “Y-you will…? But you just went on a tangent about how my ‘deadbeat’ friend isn’t worth the effort.”

“What can I say? Your impassioned speech tugged on my heartstrings, [First]-chan,” he coos, a wolfish grin spreading across his face. “Maybe I’m growing soft after all. Alright, now let’s start with you giving me your phone number--”

“Hold on!” you exclaim, putting up a hand. “I don’t need help from someone like you.”

Now it’s his turn to be thrown off by another person’s words. Maybe a taste of my own medicine, he thinks.

Here he was, figuring you’d grovel at his feet for help. Now that he’s extending a hand out of what you should perceive as goodwill, you… don’t want it…? There’s no quick, witty response. The cogs in his head are turning, trying to comprehend this bizarre situation, and coming up with nothing satisfactory. He hears what’s most definitely Namie struggling to cover up a laugh in the distance.

“Were you not just trying to convince me?” Izaya quirks up an eyebrow. That’s how he perceived your earlier lecture, as a way to bring him over to your side. For a rare moment, there’s no condescending lilt in his voice, only a genuine attempt to rationalize your actions.

You’re already moving on from this loss, picking the scattered pictures up and returning them to your handbag. “Not really. I just didn’t like the thought of you looking down on someone without really knowing anything about them.”

This time, Namie isn’t capable of muffling her laughter. Izaya sighs as he leans back into his couch. How troublesome you’re proving yourself to be. Do you not realize that a few phone calls from his behalf would be enough to ruin you for the rest of your life? Or maybe you do realize, and don’t care either way. Whatever the case, he’s not letting this go. It’s not everyday someone manages to leave him at a loss for words.

“So it’s back to the police then, hm?”

You shake your head at his guess, frowning. “I’ll just figure it out on my own. Thank you for your time, Orihara-san.”

Now you’re standing to leave. Turning your back to him, you make for the door, leaving Izaya to try and piece together what’s happening to him. Izaya follows after you, intent on changing your mind. Anything to keep you close so he can continue observing.

“What exactly are you planning on doing? It sounded to me like you had no leads or connections. I’m not sure how familiar you are with investigation work, [First]-chan, but you’re not off to a very good start.” Izaya calls over, successfully getting you to stop in place. It’s a relief to know he hasn’t lost his touch. You don’t look fully convinced, so he continues on.

“I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but you’re going to be helpless all on your own,” Izaya points out, your grimace growing deeper with every word. He’s getting somewhere, he just needs to reel you back in. “We wouldn’t want my earlier premonition to come true.”

“I guess so,” you agree without enthusiasm, lips pursing. Izaya can’t help but feel satisfied with your compliance. Then you continue walking towards the door. “I need to give it some more thought. I’ll call your secretary this evening.”

With that, you’re out of sight, the door shutting in his face. Hm. He doesn’t get the feeling you’re acting like this out of spite. No, you’re sticking true to your own convictions, trying to get a feel for how to best work things out. Izaya’s already planning to run multiple checks on you. He has a growing curiosity for knowledge on you that needs to be quenched. What school you’re going to, where you currently live, if you have a record--

“I can’t say I was expecting that,” Namie comments in her usual monotone. From the skin tightening underneath her eyes, Izaya can tell she’s still fighting back a smile. “Someone turning down your offer to help and lecturing you? I almost feel undeserving of such a wonderful sight.”

Izaya sighs and runs a hand through his dark hair. “I’m glad you enjoyed your boss being berated so much.”

“There’s almost nothing better,” she concurs with a nod. “When you’re finished standing there and moping, I already brought her social media up. I figured you’d want to see it after that display.”

This is enough to capture his undivided attention. The boredom from this week is a relic of the past, Izaya’s enthusiasm for human beings returning in full bloom. What a terrifying beast you’ve managed to awaken. You’ll make for a fascinating source of entertainment. He already finds himself looking forward to the next time you cross paths, Izaya confident in his ability to make this happen. He excels at interrupting the flow of people’s lives unprompted.

- - -

The rest is history, so they say.

Izaya’s whittled you down this far, creating a codependency that pleases him, a result of hard work on his behalf. You stare at him with doe-like eyes. Vulnerable eyes. Waiting with bated breath to see if he’ll confirm or deny your deepest concerns.

He wraps an arm around your slouching shoulder. "Now that you have me, what you are or aren’t capable of on your own doesn’t matter anymore. Isn’t that right, [First]-chan?”

“I... I guess it might be.”

#btw the title for this fic is just a reference to the weeknd #the lyrics felt somewhat fitting...#i kept listening to it when writing this #izaya #Izaya Orihara #orihara izaya #jojo's bizarre adventures #yandere izaya #yandere #yandere x reader #durarara #durarara imagine #yandere durarara #durarara x reader #yandere imagine #yandere scenario #my stuff #commissions

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musicallisto · 4 years ago

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Hi, congrats on 800 followers! Can I please get a Six of Crows ship? I’m have short brown hair (I dyed red last week) and green eyes. I don't mind if im shipped with a girl or a boy. I like reading (no romantic novels), music and photography. I'm Aquarius. I’m very curious. I'm a little shy and even cold at first. I’m not good with feelings, I mostly keep them to myself if I can, but I care deeply for my loved ones and would do anything to help them, even if I'm not very good at giving advice. ☆

hi! here’s your vanilla milkshake, I hope you like it! I ship you with jesper fahey!

You don’t imagine the extent of my joy to be able to add a gif of an actual real person for Jesper... however shall I survive until Aprid 23rd?

For the longest time, you thought the world started and ended at your corner of Fjerda, in your frozen estate by the True Sea.

You were descented from minor Fjerdan nobility, and your father, jaded by Court Life and its political intrigues - and, unofficially, penniless after giving his all for the sempiternal wars on Ravka -, had decided to leave the capital and retire to his family’s estate by the sea a few years after you were born.

All you had ever known were the large, marbled corridors you’d spend entire afternoons wandering, daydreaming about adventures in the confines of the country - or living the lavish life of a true Fjerdan princess, in an outrageously enormous bed of satin sheets...

The house was spacious and beautiful, with a marvelous view over the sea, gently carrying its boats to and fro before you - and you’d stay there on the balcony in your flowy white dress, admiring the ocean until you couldn’t fight the chills of the night creeping up your spine anymore; but as tranquil and languid as your existence was, it was also terribly lonely.

All you longed for was a sibling, a friend, a partner in crime, someone you could explore the world and go on quests with...

... until a lighting bolt tore the silence, one night.

You couldn’t sleep, so you had gone on a walk by the shore as you often did - your father was never worried about it, since you knew the rocks and their cracks like the back of your hand, and would know the way back home even with your eyes closed.

But you were so absorbed by the distant twinkling of stars that you didn’t notice the shadows creeping up behind you until it was too late.

Screams in a language you can’t understand; an arm around your neck in a chokehold, another slipping under your knees; you thrash around, slice all you can, bite and claw at all you can grasp...

Your abductors know better than to let Fjerdan nobility get away from their grasp. They don’t know exactly who you are - but they’ve guessed from the distinguished aspect of your house that there’s a fine sum to gain from whoever will be willing to pay for you - your father for a ransom, or anyone else, in Kerch, who’ll make good use of your services.

Those brothels in Ketterdam pay good money for young girls, they hear - even more so for a Fjerdan pearl.

When they throw you on an overloaded carriage like a potato sack, you’re still yelling at the top of your lungs, pleading for your father, for one of your maids, for anyone to help you.

But no one hears.

You shed all the tears you have in the first night, tossed around in a dark chariot, off to somewhere unknown. Your father hasn’t prepared you for this - nothing, not even your books nor your fantastical imaginary adventures...

But you don’t intend on being sold off that easily. So you devise a plan to get away.

The first opportunity to break free presents itself when your kidnappers force you to board a ship; but they manage to catch you before you’ve run very far.

But second time’s the charm; with nothing better to do during the voyage than to bide your time and gnaw at your bonds, you’re able to slip from your captor’s watch, and blindly run through the harbor - just to get as far as possible from the stench of this floating carcass.

The first thing that strikes you is the odor. You’ve known the sea forever - it’s clear and bright as ice, and smells of fresh mornings and cold salt; never of this green rot that festers everywhere in these streets... and all those chimneys, all those people, who stare you down as you run down these grimy streets, barefoot in your off-white dress...

You understand that you’re farther from home than you’ve ever been, and it’s not a thrilling adventure, it’s terrifying and overwhelming, and you want nothing more than to burst into tears.

But you don’t, because a pair of strangers flag you down in a language you don’t understand.

A tall and lanky dark-skinned boy, wearing vibrant fabric and a self-assured grin; and possibly the most beautiful girl you’ve ever seen in your life, all bright eyes and genuine frown.

Paralyzed, you open your mouth, once, twice, incapable of making the slightest sound; until the girl notices your visible discomfort, and, eyeing your pale eyes, asks in the slightest of Ravkan accents;

“Are you Fjerdan?”

You nod with all your soul. You’re ready to cling onto them both for dear life.

“What happened to you?”

Your voice fails you - you can’t explain it - you haven’t even comprehended it all. You were curled up in front of the fireplace just the night before...

“Do you have anywhere to go?”

You shake your head with despair, trying to blink back the tears.

“Come with us. We know someone who’ll help you.”

You don’t mull it over very long. Maybe it’s your sheltered uprbinging that has made you naive; maybe it’s the curiously comforting warmth you see in the Ravkan girl’s eyes; but you simply have no better option, and you can’t understand a word of Kerch, or wherever it is that this barbarian folk speak.

Although your two saviors start arguing, probably about whether or not they can reasonably take you in, your tear-stained cheeks and desperate vulnerability are enough to convince them - so you follow them.

Into the lair of the Dregs, of whom you’ve never heard - and of Kaz Brekker, who you know very well.

After all, he’s the infamous gangster who invaded your homeland, broke into the Ice Court, and stole the Shu boy - or so you saw your father read in the papers. To know that you are under the same roof as that lowlife would be enough to give your father a heart attack...

You’re half convinced that he’ll throw you back to the streets, but Nina and, surprisingly, Jesper as well, plead in your favor with a greatly convincing fervor. You learn that it’s probably because Kaz has much greater worries on his mind - the criminal group is planning on retrieving one of their own from the clutches of a treacherous business partner, or so you’ve gathered.

Either way, you’re more than happy that the terrifying and redoubtable Kaz Brekker is leaving you alone, and that you can enjoy Jesper’s company.

You two become unexpectedly good friends overtime. He comes to visit you at the Crow Club, where you’re staying, almost every day. Yet communication is not your strong suit, especially in a language you don’t understand at all, and you don’t fancy yourself a particularly enthralling girl to be around.

Not when one has lived the life of a criminal, a sharpshooter, a wanderer, a playboy... well, all those things that Jesper prises himself on being, and all those words he’s taught you in Kerch.

(That and the curse words, of course, that you’re a bit intimidated to use at first, until they slip out of your mouth one evening when you drop your plate at dinner with the Dregs, and the entire canteen falls dead silent.)

“Did she just say ‘fuck’?”

“I think she just said fuck.”

“See, Matthias, she wasn’t immediately struck by lighting by Djel’s hand. You won’t die if you say it.”

Speaking of Matthias, he’s also a good friend of yours - it’s comforting and refreshing to have a familiar face around, one of Fjerdan roots and mores.

Although the rest of the group says you’re not that Fjerdan.

“You’re one of the feisty ones, at least.”

“I’m not ‘feisty’. Shut up, Jesper.”

“Ah, I see you’ve been working on the vocabulary I taught you!”

Matthias and you both have a lot of soul-searching and unlearning to do about the outside world - you were raised in particularly bigoted environments, you somewhat less than him. The hatred for the Grisha he’s been taught by the Drüskelle is fear in your case; you’ve been brought up on bedtime stories of bloodthirsty Grisha who devour unruly kids, and war and devastation caused by their unstability and blasphemous magic.

It’s even more of a shock to you when you learn Jesper is a Grisha.

Unbeknownst to you, you’ve started to fall a little for him - how could you not? He’s funny, charming, sarcastic and witty; always has the best stories to tell, and despite it all, sincerely cares for you amidst the chaos of their heist and revenge plans.

But to learn he was the kind of monster - no, the kind of creature - no, the kind of person, you force yourself to correct mentally - that you had been taught to fear for your entire life...

“I’m so sorry. You should never have been there.”

He’s pacing back and forth in your room after a shootout has gone awry and you were caught in the crossifre; it’s the first time he’s ever had to use his Durast powers to get you of the mess - and normally he wouldn’t have, because it’s a secret he wishes he could carry to the grave, but the fear of losing you was too strong...

“Thank god that I was there, though. What would you do without me?”

He’s fidgety and restless, nervously playing with his pistols, and his nervous laugh is all but genuine; and you’re huddled up on your bed, staring him down with wide eyes.

“Jesper, you...”

“Yeah, maybe not the best moment.”

“Jesper...”

“It’s like they have a knack for knowing exactly where we’re gonna be and when...”

“Jesper!”

He abruptly turns to look at you, and his eyes widen. He’s starting to understand, almost, but refuses to believe it. Your voice is a murmur, and you can hardly hold his gaze.

“Jesper, are you... going to hurt me?”

His words die in his throat. He remembers where you’re from... the garbage that they must have filled your ears and head with from the day you were born... how feverish Matthias was with Nina... he looks at his hands, and his Materialki magic rumbles like a dark curse.

“Y/N, you’re scared of me?”

The sheer hurt in his voice breaks your heart. Even though you’re trembling, you let him step closer to you, slowly. It’s Jesper in front of you, not some ungodly monster from legends... Jesper, your Jesper...

“I’m... I’m sorry...”

He cups your face in his hands, warm and just a bit moist, and stares into your eyes with a vulnerability you have never seen in him.

“I’d never do anything to hurt you, Y/N, I swear on my life. All I want is you to be safe...”

Safe from me, if that’s what you wish, he thinks for a split second, but you don’t give him time to doubt; you’ve captured his lips in a frenzied kiss, and hold on for dear life onto his lean shoulders.

Fjerda and its blind hatred is very far from you, now. You're locked in Jesper's embrace, and you won't have to hear their lies anymore.

You know you have nothing to fear from him; not now, and not ever.

800 follower sleepover CLOSED!

#sarcasticandfangirl #800sleepover #THIS GOT SO LONG OMG i need to write for six of crows already the inspiration is unquenchable #six of crows #soc #grishaverse #ship request #jesper fahey #jesper fahey x reader #jesper fahey headcanons #six of crows headcanons

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elffees · 4 years ago

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LIS 2 canon survey!

so out of curiosity i went and created a survey wondering about people's personal interpretation of LIS2's possible canon story :D

i'm curious on what choices you all think of as being the ones that most closely reflect what you see as canon. so basically, what do you think most likely happened? i dont necessarily mean "what do you think realistically happened", because LIS2 is a story and stories often take plot directions away from realism and go for what would fit the theme (or character's personalities) best.

however, i'm also not saying your perception of canon can't be based on realism either. it absolutely can. what your canon is, is entirely up to you.

what my survey is about, is asking what choices you view as part of your personal interpretation of what you believe to be closest to canon. it will most likely be different from others because everyone perceives things differently, and with all the decisions you can make, i'm extremely interested in what fans interpret as part of their idea of canon.

as a warning, this survey is LONG so i've split it up into 3 parts so no one feels obligated to complete everything in one go. i actually encourage taking a break in between parts because if you tire out, you'll likely begin to skip more questions to rush to the finish line (not that you HAVE to answer every question, tons are optional). i've linked the parts at the end of each section so you dont have to refer back to this post, but just in case you dont see them or smthg goes wrong, here are the links to all the parts here:

Link to Part 1

➥ https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfA6GAqxfNI6ESLX5ta3z3RC6xNNu3a640G1ej4tBzyWVce-g/viewform

Link to Part 2

➥ https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdi3C3om743nTpDVfMP16MaW7p5UzMOd3DDn9u4BJ0EVHC2gg/viewform

Link to Part 3

➥ https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSc33FQNQZuj1vMttntl8Ay40vnwTojbCDpJiYyeNX5EZc4Ing/viewform

i will post the results after two weeks!

if you want to share this survey across other sites like Twitter or etc., (which i dont have) that’s perfectly fine! i want to get a lot of responses, especially across platforms because im really curious.

(and another warning, there's massive spoilers in the survey for different routes. so if you want to avoid that then uhhh be wary lol)

happy answering! :)

#life is strange #life is strange 2 #lis2 #lis 2 #lis #life is strange2 #is that all the tags.... i cant think of any others lol #babbles #hope you guys like my survey!

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mrs-nate-humphrey · 4 years ago

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how do u think a dair + serenessa double date would go? 👀

i tried my best, but tbh i think it’d be chaotic because i feel like the kind of things serena and vanessa would do on dates vs the kind of things dan and blair would do on dates would be wildly different! so if any of these options feel ooc that’s probably why. this was a fun ask though! and i came up with 5 potential double dates so hopefully at least ONE feels correct....

under the cut, because it got long (of course it did)

pre-date, dan & vanessa get ready together, and blair & serena get ready together. i think blair would do fishtail braids for serena or something, and serena would give blair input on what to wear, zip her dress. they'd fix each other's make-up. dan and vanessa would be doing the same thing! vanessa fixes dan's tie (she's had practice with nate's ties after discreet make-out sessions at his WASPy relatives' place, she knows how to fix a tie) and smooths down his suit. dan probably does something elaborate or fancy or pretty with her hair, braiding ribbons in or something (he grew up with jenny, he knows how to help a girl look fancy for a special occasion).

option 1:

they'd meet at a neutral location, like a park or something, and vanessa and serena would walk around slightly ahead of dan and blair, arms looped together, talking excitedly about something that dan and blair exchange puzzled looks at. dan and blair would walk around too, more leisurely, not really saying much but just enjoying each other's company? or maybe the would talk a lot because, well, they're dan and blair. eventually, blair reaches out for dan's hand and holds it and dan turns a fascinating shade of pink

they're in the park for an hour, until they either get bored or get kicked out for hanging out in the kids area because they're making the children wait lkhfdlkfgklgf. i think vanessa and serena would spend a lot of time on the merry go round while dan and blair stare at them with disappointed horrified wonder, like "how are they going so fast and not throwing up?" / "i don't know" . dan and blair would just sit on swings and not swing LKFHLKDGH.

after this, they do dinner at a posh restaurant, blair's choice.

option 2:

art gallery date!

dan and blair are being their lovely pretentious selves, going deep into symbolism and historical context and interpretation of paintings using different frameworks and like - vanessa knows enough to join them in the debate, but like....

serena is right there staring at various pictures and saying things like "this shade of green is so calming and soothing, makes me think of peppermint" or "if i could only see one colour for the rest of my life, it'd be this violet" or "this blue feels so melancholic" and vanessa finds herself so so so curious about what serena means, and she really wants to know what her girlfriend means, so she loops an arm around serena's waist and asks all the right questions (she's not trying to ask the right questions, she genuinely wants to know), all "what do you mean by that" or "why do you think that is" or "melancholic how? could you give me another example?"

serena is touched that vanessa actually wants to hear her interpretations as opposed to being academic or whatever

meanwhile dan and blair are two seconds away from yelling or frothing at the mouth. they are looking at a picture of sisyphus and arguing about what it means.

"do we do something about that?" serena asks. "nah, they're flirting," vanessa says.

db disappear for a hot minute, and when they return, blair's lipstick smudged on dan's face, serena and vanessa do a GREAT JOB at keeping their expressions neutral

option 3:

beach date! blair hates it because of all the sand but then dan piggybacks her everywhere and she's too busy having fun to really think about the sand. until dan runs right into the waves and she's shrieking, and she's like, humphrey do you know how much these clothes cost, and he thinks she's going to cry or something, and she knows he thinks that, because the next thing he knows, she's pushing him back into the water and he's spluttering because he actually dressed up for once (yes, he dressed up for the beach, his fancy ass girlfriend is totally rubbing off on him)

serena and vanessa just look at them like why are our friends like this

serena gets a surfboard and vanessa watches her and cheers

dan and blair are both just lying on a picnic blanket (vanessa's picnic blanket, now covered in seawater, thank you very much) and laughing so hard that vanessa goes, 'hey, are you both sober? did you show up here drunk?' and that just sets them off again

option 4:

open mic! blair bullies dan into performing a poem, and he goes, i know you write too, waldorf, so you’ve got to do something as well, and she does!! she’s never really thought of herself as a writer before but at that minute, she does.

vanessa gives serena a poem she’s written on the back of a receipt from some coffee shop, and serena goes and performs it, and dan and blair are both like, why didn’t you perform your own poem? and vanessa’s like, i wrote it for serena to perform. it’s a poem meant for serena in every possible way

they want to tease her for being a sap but they unfortunately have no ground to do so

after this they go to some nice, fun, extremely casual eatery in brooklyn and blair complains loudly and at every possible opportunity but once they’re actually there, she’s all smiles. she steals the salad off dan’s plate

serena talks to vanessa later, about ‘did you give me a poem to ensure i wouldn’t feel left out?’ and vanessa goes ‘no i gave you a poem because i wanted to. because i can’t stop writing poems about you and you mean so much to me’

option 5:

vanessa takes all of them to a lesbian concert

blair’s initially awkward about it like ‘i don’t want people to think im a lesbian!’ and dan is like “you can just kiss me in that case” and vanessa is like, “funny, nate never complained about that”

later, blair talks to dan about how the real reason she’s iffy about this concert is her hugeass crush on serena from when they were kids, and she’s over it, but sometimes she remembers it and it always hurts

and dan, to her surprise, gives her a hug and tells her about the hugeass crush he had on vanessa, and how she took him to these concerts all the time before she left and he kept wondering what it meant, because it always felt like a date, their bodies always smushed close together because of the way the crowd would be, and he tells her that it hurt, but he wants to go to a concert with blair, to make new memories or whatev

blair is like ‘nothing about this experience sounds appealing’

dan is like, ‘give it a try before you judge it’

and blair does and she hates the crowd as expected so she and dan sit outside together and she feels mildly awful about making him miss the concert, but they’re near one of the doors and they can still hear the music and blair thinks the band isn’t half bad and she tells him that, and dan laughs, like, ‘see? i knew you’d like them’ and blair gives him an incredulous look and kisses him

and keeps kissing him

serena and vanessa come out of the venue laughing, faces pink and flushed, and they look at dan and blair, who are standing there and smiling and looking sort of quiet and at peace and happy despite leaving in the middle

vanessa checks on blair, and blair smiles at her and says it’s all good, and v believes her, because she looks really happy

#dair #serenessa #anon #this was so much fun and i am SO deep in my feels #despite difference in vibes i feel like both serenessa and dair sort of like #have this ability to see each other's worst flaws and go 'i love you anyway'#which makes them so similar despite being wildly different?

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nandolonso · 5 years ago

Text

SWEET DREAMS ARE MADE OF THIS (John Wick X Reader)

("TEACHER" X STUDENT COLLEGE AU)

Pairing: John Wick x Reader (AU - ish?)

Summary: John Wick lives a different life before his "retirement". He becomes a sort of vigilante, who is taking out the bad guys. His next goal is to catch a drug dealer who mainly distributes in Y/N's college. However, after meeting Y/N, not only Y/N's life turn upside down but also John's.

Word count: 8281

Warnings: ugh, so many. But it's John Wick, so... blood, swearing, college, anxiety, panic attacks, loneliness, shyness, angst, slow-burn, age gap, smut, DIRTY SMUT, fluff.

ALSO, IM NOT A NATIVE SPEAKER OF ENGLISH SO PLEASE FORGIVE MY MISTAKES!

Author’s note: GUYS!! I've found this fanfic deep down in my-never-posted-writings and I was re-reading it when I thought, this is just utter shit, let me post that (lol), I hate myself. 😂 I was cringing at some part, but I managed to write them over, so it is a little bit bearable. I don't know if you'll like it, but I hope you do. I wanted to post something to cheer you up in this hard time. I wish the best for all of you. ♥️ The inspiration came from some many places, but mostly from "calling teachers by their first name" videos. You'll see why I got the idea from it... After that, I've given some thought about "fake" teacher John and gosh... let me tell you, it got me hot and bothered. Also inspired by 21/22 Jump Street. Please, please, leave some feedback.

P.S.: Sadly, I don't know any Italian, so thank you for Google Translation for "sponsoring" this fic lmao.

This was your very last year of college. More specifically, your last semester. Thank God. You could not be happier as you thought about it. Even though you enjoyed studying, you were overwhelmed with your lectures as you were a maximalist and wanted to give 100% in everything. You enjoyed learning and finding new topics but the assignments, the presentations, and the exams stressed you out incredibly. You did not apply for any further study at least at the moment as you wanted to rest a little bit and work somewhere till you find out what you really wanted to achieve in life.

The first week went by quite easily, as the teachers mostly talked about the syllabus and what you can expect from the rest of the semester. Thankfully, everyone seemed kind of nice except your Italian teacher and his lesson, which you took up as an optional course in the first place since you wanted to earn some extra credits. Now, it seemed like a bad decision. The teacher was old, who did not enjoy his teaching at all. It was difficult to follow and boring, not to mention that he continually talked in Italian even though it was a beginner's course. When the others tried to tell him, he became mad and gave out even more assignments for next week.

So now, that you were sitting in class and waited for him the nervousness which you felt was understandable. You were chatting with one of your classmates who sat behind you. You could not say that you had any friends. You were mostly alone in your whole life, which sometimes was a curse, while other times it was a blessing. You opened up for so many people who disappointed you and let you down that this was the safest way of living your life now. Just talk to someone if necessary, otherwise living your life as you wish. Sometimes it was really depressing as there was basically no one to talk to, you could not share any interest with someone, not your desires, your goals, nothing. Even when you did, you became the focus of mockery.

Suddenly everyone became silent as most certainly, the teacher approached into the room. However, when you turned around your last week's grumpy teacher was nowhere to be found, instead of him, you meet with a totally different man. You looked straight him into the eye as you took up his presence. He was tall, he had a skinny physique but you could certainly see that he was muscular, even though the black shirt and jeans he wore covered his entire body. He had dark, semi-long hair which was slicked back, while he also had dark stubble, which was framing his face aesthetically. Now, his dark brown eyes laid on you and it was like it burned a hole into your soul. He had some characteristic which you could not explain, but you were sure that he was attractive. Very much. And exactly your type. Not to mention that he was older than you, around his mid-30s - early 40s, which you thought was the perfect age as you were always fond of older men.

"Uhm... hey everyone" he started as he finally looked away from you to gaze at the others as well. His voice sent shivers down your spine. It was deep and husky. "I'm John Wick and I'll substitute your last teacher, who became ill. He will turn up as soon as he feels like it, but we don't know when that will happen," he stated. Maybe, the previous teacher would have been better. Now, it will be really hard to focus and now you wanted to study even more just to impress him, which is sounded insane. You immediately started to curse yourself in your head because what you did was completely silly.

"I'm not by any means an Italian teacher, but I'm fluent in Italian, as I've lived in Italy and since this is a beginner's and optional course I thought I will be just as good for this short time as Y/LT/N would have been." as he finished he clapped his palms together, facing towards the desk which now became his. "Firstly, let's start with an introduction and what your goals are, and from that on we can move with the rest of the lecture," he said and turned and pointed towards you. This gesture was unexpected for you and you immediately felt that your cheeks burned up as you tried to collect yourself. You were a great student but you were dealing with anxiety when you had to speak in front of others. Your mind and desires were totally different that you could actually manage out from yourself, and this was true in every situation.

"Uhm..." you started as you cleared your throat. "I'm Y/N and I'm a final year student here. To be honest, I don't really have many goals at the moment, because..." the way he was looking at you completely took your breath away. It was like he sees all of your secrets. "...I want to take a little bit of break from studying after I've finished. I want to work somewhere, see the word. Just those cliché things that usually everyone says." he started to chuckle and honestly, it was the best thing ever.

"Thank you, Y/N" the way your name rolled out of his tongue was beautiful. "I hope everything turns out great for you and one day you even get to Italy as well." he smiled and turned to the next person, so the magic moment you felt completely disappeared within a second. He was just nice. With everyone. He listened to everyone's word with actual interest and wished something friendly before turning to the next person. How could you think that he sees something different in you?

The course actually ended sooner than you would expect, the time flew with him. He gave you a short assignment for next week, collecting all those things you would like to talk about in Italian. On your way out you glazed at him once more, however, his eyes were glued to the paper in front of him. You left out a soft sigh as you left the room.

This was the first time in your college years that you really waited for a lecture but at the same time, you also dreaded from it. You could not wait to meet John again or you could say Mr. Wick, but this just fueled your fantasy about him even more. You were sitting in the front row with your classmates, whom you talked about your new teacher. They were eagerly fond of him, but not as you did. Even though they find him attractive, he was just a teacher for them. However, for you, he started to become something else. You could feel something different from him and you thought that he should not be a teacher because it was just not his field. Not that he was a bad teacher or anything, but he was not that teacher type that you could imagine. You felt something which you could not explain. You were always a curious person, and this case was like a puzzle that needed to be solved.

"Buona sera a tutti! (Good evening, everyone!)" he greeted, his eyes lingering on you. You did not want to look away, so the two of your's gaze intertwined with each other for a few seconds. You managed to smile a little bit, but at that same time, he turned away. He was just as good looking as the last time, wearing a light grey t-shirt, regular jeans, and a leather jacket. How could he be this handsome?

"Okay, let's go through those things which you like to learn about, and then we can build the lecture from there." everyone nodded as he said it, preparing their notes on what they would be interested in learning in this course. Your eyes were glued on your paper, your head tilted down trying to avoid eye contact with him when you heard your name.

"Y/N" he stated. "Let's start with you just like last time." you were quite shocked. Nobody managed to remember their students' names in the first weeks. Hell, sometimes not even at the end of the semester either. You looked up at him, seeing his face focusing on you, slightly furrowing his eyebrows in concentration.

"Ordering food..." you breathed out and you started to blame yourself immediately.

"Ordering food in Italian in a restaurant?" he helped you out, stating as it was a declarative sentence, but he shifted the tone in the end. You were grateful for his help. You nodded and he returned a smile to ease your frustration. "Nice, good idea," he said. "Let's move on."

The first months of the semester went by rapidly. The first two weeks was just a warm-up, but after that assignments came after assignments as so did exams and such. You could not fantasize about Mr. Wick anymore in your free time as you were loaded with anxiety to finish every task just in time. However, you always waited for the class, even though your mind wandered somewhere else. Thankfully, about two weeks spring break will come.

"You can handle your assignments on your way out. That's the end of the class. Thank you everyone." he said and at that point, you realized that you completely forgot about your essay which you should have written for today. You thought that is due next week. Well, fuck. Basically, everyone handled in their assignment, as you approached John you became very nervous. You did not really know what to say.

"Jonathan" the words fell out of your lips without thinking. You realized that what you said was rude and you just tried to make the situation better, even though your teacher's expression did not change. "John... I mean Mr. Wick." you cursed yourself, trying to get out of the situation somehow.

"Yes, Y/N?" he asked, as he was looking down at you. He was so much taller than you, the way he looked consumed your whole being.

"I'm so sorry but I forgot to write my essay for this week. I thought it was due to next week. I'm sorry." you jabbered, looking at your feet to ease your nervousness.

"It's okay, Y/N," he said calmly. "You can handle it next week as well." when you looked up at him he was slightly smiling. That damn smirk made butterflies in your stomach, causing your heart rate to quicken.

"Really?" you asked back. "No punishments?" without thinking, the question just rolled out of your tongue.

He turned his head a little bit, trying to hide his ever-growing smile.

"Would you like to?" you started to blush at his deep voice, thinking about something inappropriate when he clearly was just talking about the assignment.

"No..." you answered. "Not for an essay, no." you just started to make everything worse. You wished that the ground would swallow you on the spot.

"Periodt then," he said to ease the tension a little bit. "Or whatever slang you use these days." You genuinely started to laugh, and it was really good after a long time. Nobody made you laugh these days and it was really nice to talk to someone besides listening to lectures all the time.

"Wow, I'm impressed" it was just absurd to hear this word from his mouth. But you really felt this way.

"My goal is accomplished than" was all he answered. Was he flirting with you? You just wished that. But the whole situation was just weird. Just the way you felt like before. He is not in the right place, something is off with him. You learned these few signals over the years just to protect yourself, still, something keeps attracted you to him.

"I'll try to write it as soon as I can and bring you in your office hours." you smiled shyly.

"It's okay, Y/N, don't worry about it" he smiled back and that smile made you go crazy. You turned your back to him to leave the room. You were standing in the door when you suddenly turned back towards him once again. He was still watching you.

"Thank you, Mr. Wick," you said, waiting for no answer when he said:

"You can call me Jonathan or John. Whichever you like." you were just standing there, completely in shock. This never happened to you before. None of your previous teachers of yours allowed to call them on their first name. To be honest, you did not even try but with John, it just slipped out. You did not know what to say so you just nodded, leaving him standing there watching after you.

The rest of the week was awful. You could not wait for the weekend when you could rest a little bit. You were extremely overwhelmed with work and it seemed that nothing wants to work out for you. It was Friday morning, thankfully you did not have any classes left so you finally could work on your assignment for Mr. Wick. You meant, Jonathan. Thinking about him and the way he said that you can call him on his first name made your heart beat faster. Since that day you could not stop thinking about him, which is why everything became harder than it should have been.

It was around 11 in the morning, but you already did a lot of work. You went to the store, then you cooked something for you for the weekend, you cleaned the house as well as doing the laundry. Your roommate was not home, as usual. Since she got that boyfriend of hers, they always spent the time together. At least, you were alone and nobody could bother you. You always did the house chores anyway, as she not usually cleaned up. After everything fallen from your hands and you basically had to clean up twice, the last task was taking out the trash. You somehow managed to take all of her and your trash into three bags. You were already on your way out when you realized that something from one of the bags was leaking. You started to become really angry and mad. At the edge of crying and breaking something, to say the least. You tried to hold back yourself together, taking a deep breath and hoping that the bag will hold on till you reached the bin in front of the street. As it was mentioned before, this was not your day.

Half of the stuff fallen on the ground just when you dumped the rest of it into the trash.

"FUCK" you cried out, hitting the top of the trash and also kicking into it to release those pressure which started to build up in you.

"Y/N" you heard a deep voice behind you. When you turned around you realized that John was there. Who probably watched the previous scene when you freaked out. What was he doing here? "You need any help?"

"Mr. Wick" you started but he interrupted you.

"John."

"Yes, John." you started. "This isn't my day. Could you please wait here as I get another bag?" you asked. You could just said that everything was fine and he could go on his day. But no. Because you did not want him to leave, even though you had no idea what was he doing here.

"Don't worry, I got some," he said while reaching for a plastic bag from his pockets. You lifted your eyebrow while he handed one to you as well as ripping one for himself. "I have a dog, so..." he said, while the two of you collected the rest of the trash. Well, this was not romantic at all. Your cheeks started to burn as you felt the situation kind of humiliating.

"What kind of dog you have?" you asked, trying to pick up the stuff as fast as you could.

"A blue English Staffordshire Bull Terrier" he breathed out when the two of you finally dumped away the rest of the trash.

"Oh, those are really nice dogs even though everyone seems to be afraid of them" you started the conversation and you could swear that his eyes lit up at your compliment.

"Oh, totally. They are super nice when they are raised well," he said smiling. "There are no bad dogs just bad owners." you just nodded, did not know what to say. A few seconds passed by just looking at each other, none of you said anything or moved.

"I should get..." he started, but at the same time, you started as well.

"Would you like a coffee or something in return?" you asked.

"Yeah, sure" he breathed but turned away from you to his car. Which you only realized just now. "Can I park here?" he asked as he gesticulated towards his Mustang. Your jaw just dropped.

"Wow. She's beautiful," you said coming closer to his car. You did not realize what you did until you actually did it. You reached out to touch the roof and at the same time approach John incredibly close. You just recognized that you did not answer his previous question. "And yes, I think you can park here but I'm not sure though."

He said nothing, just looking at you and monitoring every movement you made. He appreciated how your eyes were shining with excitement. Your fingertips which caressed his car so gently. Your hair, which slightly fallen into your face, framing it beautifully. You took his breath away.

"Would you like to try it out?" you did not really comprehend his question, as you were still focusing on his car. When the question finally hit you, you turned towards him with furrowed eyebrows.

"Is this allowed?" you asked. At this moment you wanted nothing more than him taking you out for a ride.

"Why wouldn't be allowed?" he asked back, kind of confused.

"Because you're my teacher." you simply answered back. At that moment you could swear that the smile frozen to his lips, like the reality hit him or something. Something was off. Just like you suspected before. "If you're a teacher at all," you added carefully.

"Who else would I be?" the confidence which was radiating from him started to slowly fade away. He was nervous, you could see that.

"I don't know, you just not seem to be a teacher type of guy." you started. "You don't look like it... and, surely, teachers cannot afford cars like this." you pointed towards his engine. In that second, he moved closer to you, which is why the air stuck in your throat. You looked up at him, his eyes were dark with some emotion which you could not read. You have not seen this side of him yet.

"Maybe, I got it as a gift" his voice comes through your fast heartbeat which was throbbing in your ear.

"I doubt it" you had no idea where this bravery was coming from, even you were surprised. Before he could manage to say something his phone started to ring. He pulled away from you to answer it.

"I'll be there," he said shortly, hanging up the phone. "Sorry, Y/N. I have to go." he was fast. Before you could realize he already got into his car. "Maybe next time," he added, and before you could realize he was already on his way leaving you on the sidewalk alone.

The next time you meet him was after his Italian class. You did not attend class, but you managed to arrive at the end of the session to give your essay to him. He was looking good as always, wearing dark clothes highlighting every muscle on his bare skin which was not covered.

"I'm sorry John that I couldn't come for today's class, but I had some family issues" you breathed out which was kind of true. You had family issues, anxiety issues, university issues, and just issues of issues. On top of that, you got a lot of anxiety attacks lately, which did not help you at all. Your hands were shaking as you handed your essay to him. "I know I said that I can manage to finish earlier but I couldn't," you added and he did not say a word. He did not even look at you as he took away the essay. You were heartbroken.

As he did not say anything else you just left the room completely taken aback, trying to suppress the tears which you could feel that going to burst out. When you arrived in the hallway, it was harder and harder to suppress it. You quickly went to the bathroom and when you closed the door behind you everything just came out. All of those tensions were building inside up you. Those feelings which constantly taken up your mind. That you're never good enough, that you have no one to rely on, not even a friend, not family. Nobody. You had nothing and no one. Besides that, you were constantly under stress because of the university. You wanted to perform as the best version of yourself, but you just could not hold back anymore.

After the tears came out and your breathing became a little bit better you went to the basin to wash your face with cold water and to make yourself a little bit more presentable as you still had class. You took a deep breath and got out to the next lesson. Everyone was waiting at the door as the room was not open yet. At this moment, one of your classmates who was kind of nice to you touched your arm.

"Hey, Y/N" she started. "Are you okay?" she asked.

Even though you appreciated her question, you did not know what to say.

"Yeah, sure. Why?" you lied, but it was enough for her to completely change the topic.

"Will you come to the party next week?"

"I don't know" you started. "I haven't really thought about it." as soon as you finished one of the other classmates of yours spoken up.

"She doesn't know because he is waiting for John. I mean, Mr. Wick," he said, bursting out into laughter. You did not know how he found out but your cheeks started to burn up.

"What did you just say?" you asked back, almost shouting at him when you heard the others whispering.

"Oh shit, here he comes," said one of them. When you turned back John was standing next to you. You were sure that he heard the whole conversation. When he looked at you his eyes stuck at your red ones. You were sure that he knew that you were crying. Even though the cold water helped, you still looked like a mess.

"Is there a problem?" he asked using his deep, "discipline" teacher voice. His voice was dangerously low, which sent a shiver down your spine and a feeling to your core which you tried not to think about.

"Not at all" smiled back the douchebag who started everything in the first place. John lightly grabbed your arm, turning his whole body towards you.

"Y/N, can we talk?" he whispered, but the others still managed to figure out the situation. As you answered, they started to chuckle, but at that point, you could not care less as John guided towards his office.

When there were just the two of you, he looked at you with concern on his face.

"Is everything all right, Y/N?" he asked but you just could not look at him. Your eyes were fixated on your shoes. Why would he care? He did not even look at you half an hour ago. You did not answer. You did not know what to say. He was your teacher. You could not tell him your problems even though you wanted to. "Y/N?" he asked again.

This time you looked up at him. His arms were crossed in front of his chest, waiting for your answer.

"I'm fine, thank you, Mr. Wick" you stressed his last name. A sudden expression went through his face which you could not read. "Why would you care, you're just a teacher anyway," you said without thinking of the consequences as you stormed out of his office.

The last week before spring break went quite quickly even though you felt like a zombie. You did not attend your class with John, even though you desperately wanted to. You just skipped that class, while you were attending the others. You were hiding in the hallway, trying to avoid anyone. Just arriving at the beginning of the course and coming out as soon as you could. In this way, you could survive university. Now, thankfully you had a free week when you could charge up your battery and just rest a little. Your mind wandered at the party which your classmate mentioned to you, wondering if John would be there. A few teachers had to be there, because it was a university party and they were still responsible for you somehow.

You really wanted to go. To dance, to drink and to forget all of your problems.

That is why you were standing in front of your mirror trying to soothe imaginary creases on your black dress. You kept finding mistakes on yourself, about your makeup, about your hair. But at the same time, you kept reminding yourself that this is just a party and the main goal is that you should enjoy the night without constantly thinking bullshit about yourself.

This is what you kept saying in your head on your way to the party. The place was already buzzing with music and people's voices, radiating a certain kind of heat as well. As you step inside, you were already washed away by the crowd, seeing people who you never saw before.

As you looked around you saw a giant plaque that said that it was a retro vs. modern age night. All night, songs from the 80/90s were played, after that came a piece of current music and the whole mass went insane. Everybody moved as a whole in perfect sync swaying to the rhythm of the music. Sadly, you could see that a lot of people were high and drunk, which you could never do, but you still wanted to dance. You just started to move your body alone, when your all-time a favorite song started to play from the speakers.

Sweet dreams are made of this

Who am I to disagree?

I travel the world

And the seven seas,

Everybody's looking for something

At that point, your eyes stuck at a dark figure which you could recognize even in your dreams. John Wick was standing there, looking at you. He was wearing a full black suit with his hair slicked back. You were constantly gazing at him. Even though you wanted him to be here the whole situation was absurd and unbelievable. However, he still managed to surprise you all the time.

Some of them want to use you

Some of them want to get used by you

Some of them want to abuse you

Some of them want to be abused.

Looking at him and listening to these lines hit you. Hit you really hard. As you looked at him, all of your desires and hidden fantasies started to take over your body. Your nasty hidden feelings. All of those things which you could never share with anyone. You wanted to be used, you wanted to be abused. But you wanted these in a good way. You wanted this as a thing, where the two of you want this not just you. You wanted to be safe, you wanted to feel appreciated, you wanted to feel special, you wanted to be WANTED. You wanted a man, who makes you feel things you never felt before. Who does things to you and touches you like you never experienced before. Maybe, just the daddy issues were speaking from you but looking at John you could feel that he could fulfill all of your wishes and desires. Not to mention that he would be there for you as a friend, as a lover, even as a soulmate. And as someone, who just genuinely cares about you. At least, you hoped so. But it could never happen because he was just a teacher and you were just a silly student.

However, the way he was looking at you consumed your whole being. You did not know what happened to you but you started to sensually move your hips, turning your back to him to kind of show him what he can get.

After a few seconds, you felt a muscular, hard chest pushing against your body.

"Mind if I join?" a deep voice asked and you could recognize this tone everywhere. You did not even answer as you did not have to. You just turned back towards him, getting as close as possible. He was even more handsome up close, taking your breath away.

"Is this allowed?" you shouted, but it sounded like a whisper in the crowd.

He pulled you closer to him, resting his hands on your waist and tilting his head down to bury his face into your hair.

"I don't even care anymore" he answered, his breath caressing your ear as well as the side of your neck. This sent a shiver down your spine, causing your thighs to rub together to ease the sensation which was building in your core deep down. He could feel that your body tense up between his palms, but he kept you steady with his strong and firm hands.

"What does that mean?" he looked up at you, with some expression on your face which you could not read. He wanted to tell you something, you could see that but something changed as he looked at your side.

"Stay here," he said and suddenly his touch disappeared causing you to shiver as he was not there anymore.

You could barely react, but you still managed to see where he went to. Without thinking, you started to follow him.

You looked at him everywhere when you find him outside the field of the campus. To be honest, you could barely see him but you could hear him grunting and... fighting? He was the last man standing with someone else, besides them, there were laying bodies. You could never dream of being a situation like this. You did not know what to do. You were completely frozen and could not move. Your panic started to take over your mind and you could barely manage your breathing.

"John" suddenly you cried out. He immediately looked at you, which the opponent took as a chance and hit him right in the gut. He sunk into his knees, while the other man started to approach you.

"Y/N run," he said but you could not even lift your finger. You could see as the other man was getting closer and closer to you when John grabbed him from behind and started to choke him. The other man started to run out of the air and suddenly collapsed into John's arms. John did not even think twice, he dropped the enemy onto the ground. Before you could realize, John grabbed your arm, dragging you across the field into the parking lot where you saw his car.

"Get in the car!" he ushered you, but you could barely move. You were completely frozen which was insane thinking that your body was on fire just a few minutes ago.

"Why?" you managed to push this word out of you when he started to yell.

"Get in the fucking car!" he said and that predatory look on his face with some bruises and blood made him look like a totally different person. You got in the car, slowly breathing out that air that you did not know you were holding. He started the engine and drive at a very high speed toward somewhere which you could not recognize.

"Where are you taking me?" your throat was dry. It was hard to speak, but this was the only sentence which you dared to ask after minutes.

"Home. To me," he answered shortly.

"Why?" you whispered but he could hear it. After minutes, you finally looked at him. He was holding the wheel so damn strong that his knuckles went white. He was angry, you could see that. His whole expression changed as he was not looking at you, just fixating his eyes on the road.

"Because you fucking messed up your goddamn life" to hear him swearing made you sense that you are truly in deep trouble.

"What did I do?" you asked softly and suddenly all of his muscles started to loosen up at your tone.

"I was taking out a gang when you just showed up, risking your whole life just to look after me." he started.

"So you..." you started softly as you could feel that the ice between the two of you started to melt. "You're not a teacher." was all you managed to say.

"God no," he answered, and before you could realize you started to laugh. It came from the bottom of your heart. He looked at you the first time, furrowing his brows. "It's not funny, Y/N.," he said and before you could stop yourself the following words just slip out of your mouth:

"Thank God, 'cause ever since I saw you I've kept telling myself that I can't fall for a teacher" as soon as you said it your cheek started to burn. He looked at you with piercing eyes.

"I'm not a teacher, but I'm way worse," he said in a dangerously low voice. And thinking back to those guys around him finally hit you.

"Who are you?" you whispered. He looked back at the road as he could not bear to see your expression when he told you the truth.

"I'm a ..." he started, but he did not want to say assassin. Because that was just too much the handle. "I'm the one who takes out the bad guys." you nodded, did not know what to do with this information. You have always known that there is something wrong with him, but you could not explain why. Now, this was the reason and you wished that you did not know. Still, you fell for him even more.

"Did you kill them?" you asked.

"No." he answered back. "I didn't have my gun." suddenly you felt that breathing becomes heavier.

"Have you killed someone?" you barely dared to ask this question but the heavy silence which felt on you told more than words.

You did not say a word until he finally stopped at his garage. His house was beautiful, so big that it was unbelievable that it only belonged to him.

"Wow..." you whispered and he smiled.

"Y/N" he started and you turned towards him. "I'm sorry that I disappointed you. I just wanted to protect you. You'll stay here until I finish this business and make sure that no one harms you. After that, you're free to go." you did not know what to say. You wanted to say something, but you could not. Your mind wandered somewhere else, constantly thinking about what the two of you talked about in the car. You told him about your feelings and he did not even say anything. "I have a room for you here," he said and ushered you to a room, leaving you alone.

You could barely get some sleep. Your mind was constantly thinking about John and his life. How dangerously he lived and how he managed to keep his camouflage at the university. Honestly, you even cried that night as well. You did not know what to do and how to react, even though you wanted him. Your mind could not be silenced after you saw him in action and what he did you still thought about his arms, his hands, and his body as he pulled you closer to him at the party. Not to mention that you felt his goddamn intoxicating perfume in his whole house as well as in the sheets.

After being up all evening, you woke up late in the afternoon. It was already 5 when you looked at the clock on the nightstand on your left. You left out a sigh, focusing on sounds. But you could not hear any. You slowly got up and opened to the door.

“John?” you cried out but no answers came. Instead of that, you heard something which was running towards you. Then you saw John’s dog. “Oh my God, you’re so cute” you kneeled to the ground to pet the dog which was in its early months. It was still small, but you could see the strong, robust figure which started to form underneath its skin. “Where were you last night?” you asked as if the dog could answer you. However, after petting and talking to it all of your stress and doubts left the mind.

You went to the kitchen, where on the counter you found a note. It was written by John and he had beautiful handwriting.

“Make yourself at home.” was all it said. Straightforward. Just like John.

After taking a shower and finding a long t-shirt in John’s wardrobe you finally sat down onto the sofa when the front door opened. John came in, the dog immediately cheered him licking and panting all over him. You watched the scene with a smile on your face. After John returned the same excitement as the dog, he finally looked at you. You were wearing one of his t-shirts. And that was it.

“What are you wearing?” he demanded. You stood up immediately, trying to explain yourself.

“You said that make yourself at home, so I’ve showered and searched for something to wear because the dress was really uncomfortable,” you said quickly. John left out a soft “oh” as he could have thought about this in the first place. Even though he did not want to admit, but he really liked the way it looked on you.

“Everything is clear now,” he stated simply. “I’m taking you home. Are you ready?” he asked and you were just standing there as if your legs got stuck into the ground.

“You don’t want to talk about it?” you started carefully, hinting to your previous unfinished conversation last night as well how he “cleared everything up”.

“No.” was all he said which felt like ripping and turning up your insides. You just nodded, turning away to suppress all of your emotions. That’s it. All of your fantasies about this man ended. He did not want to do anything with you. This was just business after all. And he finished it.

“I’m grabbing my stuff” you whispered, your throat was dry you could barely speak.

After collecting your dress and purse you were standing in front of him again. “Take me home,” you said firmly when his form started to loosen up.

“Y/N” he followed you as you were heading into the garage. His beautiful car was there, standing next to another one.

“Just take me home.” was all you said before he grabbed your wrist, pulling back to him and pushing his lips against yours. The kiss was not a soft one. It was passionate and hard. It took a few milliseconds to react, but gosh… it was desperate. From the two of you. Teeth clicked, tongues rolled against each other as the two of you started to express which words could not. He was cupping one of your cheeks, pushing you closer to him as much as he could. Your hands started to explore his body, caressing the soft material of his suit. You could feel as he started to harden beneath your touch, basically… everywhere. Just like in a second, which made you even more insane. He wanted you so much, he could barely hold himself back. He was rucking up your shirt with his other hand, grabbing your waist strongly which sent goosebumps all over your body. His touch was just like you imagined. No… it was even better. It took a side of you which you did not even know you had.

You could feel that you started to wet your panties even though he did not even touch you there yet. He was now kissing you a little bit softer but still passionately, sucking your bottom lip into his mouth. You started to moan as it did whole new sensations to your body which you never experienced before. He lifted you up from the ground before you could realize, to make you sit on the hood of his car. At that exact moment, you hooked your legs around his legs, pulling him closer to you. It was insane how the two of you moved in sync. It was like a perfect dance and choreography, even though you have not done this before to the other. But still, it was like you found a long lost piece from yourself. And he felt the same. The two of you did not stop kissing until his hands reached up to your neck, softly squeezing it to make out a moan from you which you could not even stop. John immediately stopped looking at you with concern on his face.

“Did I hurt you?” he asked softly looking at your neck if he caused any injuries. He did not even know what he has done until you moaned.

“Gosh no,” you started to laugh and blush. “It just… felt really good.” his eyes lit up with lust. It became even darker than it already was. He was looking at you, constantly holding his gaze when he reached again to your neck. He squeezed it a little bit harder this time, but it was even better. Your eyes rolled back as your core started to throb with desire.

“Fuck, Y/N” he breathed at the sight. “You’re making me insane.” was all he said before sinking to his knees. He pulled you closer to him, making you lay on the edge of his car. He looked so good kneeling between your thighs. And he looked even better when he started to stroke your clit through your underwear. He sharply sucked the air just by the sight of it.

You were laying on his car in your black lace panties. This was even better than he could ever dream for. He was holding himself back, but he was about to burst out.

“You look so good,” he said as he pushed your panties to the side to insert one finger slowly into you. You laid back all the way on his car as he started to finger your inside with one hand and your clit with his other one. You bite your lip to hold your moans back, but it was a really difficult thing to do. As he was so freaking good with his hand. You could barely hold yourself back when suddenly he pulled his finger out of you. Before you could realize, your panties were on the floor, and John grabbed your thighs to draw you closer to him. Now, he used his tongue instead of his fingers to play with your wetness, causing you to arch your back pushing your backside closer to his face. He grabbed your ass firmly with his hands, he wanted to control and drive you insane. He could not let you chase for your own pleasure. He wanted to make your pleasure. He wanted to make you lose your mind. He wanted you to scream his name.

He was flicking his tongue, constantly changing position between your clit and inside thing, delving his tongue deeper and deeper. You were moaning, making sounds, saying his name with some curse words as well. You were right. He truly made you feel things that you never felt before.

Suddenly, your most intense orgasm ever washed over you out of nothing, clenching all over John’s hands and tongue as he was still fucking you mercilessly with it to help over your after wave. Your hands were still grabbing his hair, rocking your hips against his face.

“Jonathan,” you said after a few seconds when he stood up, looking at you laying on his car finally satisfied. You sit up to push a soft kiss against his lips, which on you could feel your juices. Which caused you to be even hornier. As it was possible.

“I love when you say my name” he chuckled which made your stomach flop from happiness. “That is why I can’t wait to hear you screaming it,” he added with a dangerously low voice.

“Can I ask you something, Jonathan?” you said carefully, pulling him closer to you.

“Anything, doll” he answered.

“Then, fuck me” you whispered shyly. You did not know where this bravery was from, but John truly made you feel things that you never felt before.

“You don’t even have to ask,” he said as you started to undress him. His expensive suit and tie dropped onto the floor and the same time he removed the t-shirt and bra which you were still wearing as well.

He took your whole body in and admired every sight of it.

“You’re beautiful,” he said before pressing another urgent kiss to your lips. He grabbed your hair, making you moan into his mouth at how good all of this felt. At that exact moment, he thrust into you and your whole world rocked. He stretched you all the way up, cause you to cry out his name louder than you anticipated.

“Tell me if it hurts” he added and you couldn’t form a single word because the pleasure mixed with all the pain, caused to build your second orgasm and he was restlessly fucking you. You were a moaning mess, so is he. He was grunting and cursing as the two of you started to reach climax.

“Ah, fuck-“you cried out as your walls started to clench. “Let me cum, Mr. Wick” you added and you could actually feel that Jonathan is twitching inside of you. He suddenly stopped and grabbed your neck, ushering you to look at him.

“Say that again,” he demanded.

“Which part?” you asked shyly, thinking that it was a mistake and you’ve ruined everything.

“All of it.”

“Let me cum, Mr. Wick,” you looked straight into his eyes when you said it. The fact that you’re biting your bottom lip didn’t help him at all.

“Gosh…” he huffed and continued to mercilessly pound into you, deeper and deeper each time. You were overwhelmed with the new sensations and your whole-body shake, when the second, but most intense orgasm of the night hit you. John was approaching his own climax as well, every thrust of his became a little bit sloppier and out of pace. He kissed you so softly, when he reached his own pleasure, moaning into your mouth which sent a vibration down to your body. You tensed your legs around his waist, taking him in more while lying down on the top of his car.

“I’m sorry we made a mess,” you whispered and he started to chuckle.

“Don’t worry about that, especially that we’re only getting started,” he said in a dangerously low voice. And oh boy, he was right…

This is it. It was the end of suffering. End of your university years. As for now. You couldn’t be happier as you’ve left the building and saw a beautiful mustang parked on the driveway. It was from John Wick. You were quite surprised as he said that he has to leave the town for some… business. You didn’t expect him to be back this soon. Now, you’re smile grew even bigger.

“Here is my graduated girl,” he smiled at you and pressed a soft, loving kiss to your lips when you got next to him. You gave him a half-hug in this position, laughing into his shoulders.

“I did it.”

“Yes, you did,” he said, looking straight into your eyes now. He took out an envelope from his jacket. “I brought you this,” he said softly, and you were surprised.

“John, you shouldn’t…” but he cut you off.

“Just open it!” and you did. You carefully ripped off the edges taking out two flight tickets to Italy. Tears started to gather in your eyes.

“John…” you started but you didn’t even know how to begin. He also became emotional, as he looked at you.

“At our first Italian class, you’ve said that you want to see the world. I hope this will be a good start.” you didn’t know how you got a man like John, but it was more than you deserved.

“I love you, John,” you breathed out and this was the first time you’ve actually said this. He looked at you and his whole expression changed, suddenly his body tensed up. You suddenly became afraid that you said something wrong. Maybe it was too soon. Maybe…

“I love you too, Y/N,” he said finally and he pressed a kiss into your lips which told more than words. This was just the beginning. The very beginning of your life and also the adventure, which you continued with John Wick till the very end.

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