#in relation to feminism and stuff idk

[habken]

who thinks I can write an essay in the next five hours

[mermaid-lesbian]

why isn't masculinization a popular kink in fanfiction???? like i know femslash is rare in general but god dammit i'm a nonbinary lesbian and i want my girlfriend to call my clit a dick is that so bad. :p

[genderkoolaid]

was talking to my mom about the trend of (cis) (femme) women saying "i'm a feminist but men/butches/mascs should always pay for dinner" stuff and just. if i've said it once i'll say it a million times. feminism is not "being nice to women."

like if someone offers to pay for anything, you are not obligated to deny them For The Sake of Feminism. its a nice thing to do for a date or a partner. but for one, I think we should always be suspicious of treating things popular in patriarchal culture as something secretly feminism, especially when its related to how interactions between men and women should go. and two, putting yourself in a position as a marginalized gender, where you expect to be dependent on a cis man for financial support, is potentially dangerous. its good and healthy to establish financial independence. and three its just nice to have displays of equality and partnership in a relationship. idk man putting that kind of expectation on a partner simply for their gender/gender expression would make me feel gross and mean.

[demilypyro]

Hi Demily, I've been following you for a while and wanted to ask you a trans healthcare related question if you'd be willing to answer. I've heard contradictory information regarding E levels for trans women, with doctor rangers aiming for levels at 200 pg/mL, but I've found that cis women E levels go as high as 400 pg/mL and I've heard the 200 pg/mL limit is based on outdated results for when Premarin was the main E medication, which genuinely had blood clot risks above that level, but the Estradiol used today doesn't have this risk.

I've seen some trans women online suggest raising your E levels more to the 200-300 range because of this, but my doctor wasn't too excited about this idea. I've been on E for about 1.3 years, and seen some feminization but not as much as I would like. I'm worried that the current doctor standards of trans care may be keeping me at too low levels for me to get the level of feminization I would like. What E levels did your doctor aim for?

Thank you!

idk sorry. my doctor just gave me a prescription 5 yrs ago and it gave me big boobs so i had no reason to complain. but i dont actually know for certain what my dosage is. i wear this on my stomach and i switch the patch out for a new one twice a week if that helps? i dont know enough about doctor stuff to know if this is a lot

[genderqueerdykes]

just saw that "you are loved" cuttlefish post on my dash again (idk if you know the one) but it goes through so many identities and just. does not include trans men. pan people, bi people, lesbians, trans women, intersex people, nonbinary people too i think, but not trans men. like maybe I'm taking it the wrong way, maybe I should celebrate that all of these types of people are being celebrated, i especially loved seeing intersex people included, but? the deliberate exclusion just hurts I guess. it would've been so easy to say trans people or just include trans men too.

another thing that makes me feel like I'm just being overly sensitive about it is that I do tend to lean into the nonbinary label sometimes, but it feels very "the only good enby is a femme-lite enby" and I'm. audibly sighing I used to like seeing that post on my dash

i haven't seen the post you're referring to, but i have definitely noticed this with queer positivity posts in general

like people think it's somehow progressive to aggressively leave trans men out of every conversation, ever. like, people have gone too far with profiling people based off their genders to the point where they trick themselves into thinking that trans men are now Cishet Male Oppressors and find excuses and reasons to target, bully, and emotionally abuse us. people literally just think we are undeserving of love and kindness because us disclosing that we're a man suddenly somehow is hurting that person

people are NOWHERE near as aggressive about this with cis gay men. people are not sitting here trying to weed cis gay men out of every space and post as possible. it sends me reeling to realize that people accept cis men more than trans men, even though they love to say how much they hate "all" men. is it really "all" men, or is it just trans men? because it feels very pointed toward a specific group of men that nobody loves to name, but everyone loves to hate.

i know that people who aren't trans men usually can't see the pain this causes us. but so many people just don't care. they assume that we have no feelings because they stereotype men to be emotional brick walls. they think it's okay to leave us out and abuse us because somehow, trans manhood has hurt them. like these people behave like a bus full of trans men showed up at their front door and kicked them to death.

like people really are so threatened by the idea that a "woman" can become a man. why is this an issue?

and good lord that is the ugliest take on nonbinaryhood i've ever seen. "femme-lite". wow. people really just do see nonbinary people as women, huh? nonbinary people aren't cis women jesus fucking christ. masc and butch nonbinary people are still nonbinary and there's nothing wrong with that. jesus christ people are SO scared of diversity. people are SO scared of something they can't relate to.

feminine people and women are not inherently safe to be around. i have been sexually and physically assaulted by multiple women. i have been groped by women. i have had cis women tell me that i'm "basically a woman" because i have a vagina and i'm a trans man. i've had women emotionally and mentally abuse me. women and femmes have stolen things from me. women and femmes are not inherently safe to be around. women and femmes can hurt you.

i'm sorry you're encountering this kind of stuff. people are more proud to talk about who they hate than who they love/like and it's just ugly. they don't care that it's affecting people. but if someone does something to even slightly inconvenience them, like, idk, being a trans man, then suddenly the world grinds to a halt. it's entitled behavior. it's people who want to be in control of the queer community and try to control our narratives.

there are some people who are legitimately a part of the queer community for the wrong reasons. the amount of people who are converting to rad feminism and thinking that the queer community needs to be a Cis Girls Only Club is staggering. people are trying to remove everyone but cis women who are pathologically afraid of an entire gender that hasn't hurt them. this isn't the terf club. stop trying to make this into the terf club.

i hope you're able to feel a bit better soon. people are so fucking shitty and it's time it stops. there's no reason to profile people. that's not what we do here. it's not right to leave people out of our spaces who rightfully belong. ignoring the existence of trans men won't make us go away. we're here and you need to listen to us and care about us because we are your siblings and we have not inherently wronged you by virtue of existing.

[olderthannetfic]

that anon's post about how different posting fic used to be got me thinking about my own experiences in old fandom, and man... i hate to say it, but sometimes i kinda miss writing before third wave feminism got big online. i say that as a feminist myself. i feel like some of the Anti stuff we see today comes partly from misunderstandings and strawmanning of legitimate theory and observation, especially when it comes to the topic of sexuality. the thing that especially stands out to me is online horror. when i was younger, it seemed like you could get away with pretty much whatever horrible thing you wanted, and everyone kind of understood that EVERYTHING was on the table and if you're uncomfortable with some of it you just need to move on. and one thing that's brought me a lot of comfort as an SA victim was the over-the-top, stupidly horrible SA in creepypasta and darkfic. but now even the places with the most messed up content, where that's the entire appeal, has tons of people saying "oh yes all of the murder and gore was great but did it really NEED the SA elements? that could make it so unapproachable for victims" yeah so could literally everything else in this game, joseph, it's not supposed to be for everybody. it's hard to get all my thoughts in one place but when i look back on my time online, i see a through-line from "we should be more thoughtful about how we write women" to "why is the trauma always SA" to "yknow what don't EVER write SA unless that HAS to be what happened", which... again, that's my comfort zone. it's nice, being in a place where we don't pretend like death and torture are the only threats that could be hunting you. and more and more i find myself losing that ground! every time i find a new fandom that should be cool because it's right there in the media, i'm again hit with "mmm did we really NEED that though?" to be clear i do think you should warn for that, just like you should warn for psyche horror and gore and all that. but idk, when i can't even write mild dubcon without people screaming "think of the victims!!", i feel like nobody actually cares about us. because if they did, wouldn't we be allowed to write about the experiences...? apply them to the characters we related to, even? but nah, clearly we're just romanticizing shit and stereotyping women. fucking hell, man!

--

[velvetvexations]

transemasculation: for when you think freud was right about penis envy but ONLY for dirty little trannies (but seriously what the fuck is with this term? who thought this was a good ide- oh, right, ASSHOLES!)

it's really funny because I would make jokes about how TRFs don't want transmascs to make their own language without sending it in for approval to the Transfem Council and now the famous self-identified transradfem is like "here you stupid little boys I made you a word to use if you want one so bad."

That transemasculation shit is the most obvious set up to just keep making fun tmascs because people generally think emasculation is a funny and harmless nonissue maybe even #feminism. Like whats the bet if we did start using it how they want us to people would just immediately start connecting it to our “toxic transmasculinity” to dismiss it / continue to paint us as whiny MRAs anyway ?

it's so fucking belittling

One of the most frustrating parts of when a trans fem posts transandrophobic stuff openly for the first time is how any disagreement harsher than silence gets taken as "men abusing women" and held up as proof that she was right to be wary of trans mascs all along, because look how quickly we will turn on a trans fem and attack her—any negative feelings she has over the incident are just more evidence that she is a victim under siege and right to feel this way.

the wounded gazelle gambit is very popular

The thing that bugs me about transmasc on this site who called themselves TME is that I never see them doing any actual activism for trans women, they specifically just talk down on other transmasc users. Like it comes off so fake-

that's Feminist in Bio men for you

Kinda crushed to see bee/movie/erotica post that? Like??? Yeah white trans people can hold power over me but what the fuck do you think you're doing calling my maness the same as whiteness. my maness cant be the same as whiteness because I am not fucking white. hellworld.

I'm very sorry they let you down, anon. <3

You can tell TRFs are terfs because they do the same thing that terfs do where they point to people who call them baeddels and say that their critics are calling them slurs, and then a few days later will self-identify as baeddels again

they complained so much that I very generously got people to almost entirely saying TRF instead and immediately they just go "TRF is a slur to silence me :("

"the nefarious genderqueers think they're so much more radical and valid than us while the whole queer community actually caters to them, we need more representation for Real Binary Transsexuals" is a recurring theme in Whipping Girl so no wonder it's a common refrain for the "read a singular book" crowd

they do as they are taught

i really like your sense of humour btw

Thank you!

anyways all this patricia taxxon stuff is kinda just making me more motivated to make autistic transmasc therian video essays.

as you should honestly

because i love answering questions not aimed at me, re: is cheating abuse no, but it's a dick move that can be a part of abuse. abuse in a relationship is, for the most part, long term and actively emotionally/physically harmful to at least one person. cheating can be a part of abuse (for example, the fact the abuser cheated in the past, can be held over the abusees (? idk if that's the right term) head.) but alone it isn't. i hooe this made sense. i woke up two minutes ago and have thoughts! i would love to hear yours, because peoples opinions differ a lot in subjects like this

I think I agree with that.

Tall fat hairy women <3

<3

WOOFWOOF... HELLO BEAUTIFUL

;)

I’ve seen a few of your anons discussing the proposal of ‘transemasculation’ to replace ‘transandrophobia’ but I’m not sure that anyone has shared this info yet: https://www.tumblr.com/weepingfireflies/770239720162738176/im-not-even-transmasc-or-transfem-but-the essentially, ‘transemasculation’ was coined years ago by a transmasc user alongside other terms for related and adjacent discrimination/bigotry/etc.; the user who is trying to speak over transmascs about our our terminology and experiences apparently didn’t even bother to do a cursory check that what she posited was actually a new concept

I think it's been brought up but that is very funny, in a cosmic sort of way.

"trans men are men first!" gender essentialism is going to ruin us all like yes you're quite right if you're born a man no matter what your life experiences are, you are inherently more likely to be self-absorbed assholes who hate women. absolutely. the only thing terfs are wrong about it who counts as a man and who counts as a woman yep 100% i see no issues with this clearly our Man Brains make us evil

it's like yeah people who identify as men clearly have skull shapes that show an inclination towards misogyny

i rly appreciate seeing someone else who uses similar referential terms b/c i'm bigender and i honestly really like calling myself a male manwoman. it just feels right in a way nothing else does

I'm glad!

[52stations]

i’ve never read any of jeremy’s writing but i’m curious about it, would you recommend starting anywhere in particular? :3

what a question!!! i would say start with what happens now, the main character is by all accounts a self insert and as such its very evocative of exactly how it feels to have an insane anxiety disorder - i found it horribly relatable lol.

as for his short stories i think they’re a bit hit and miss. there’s a couple i really hated at the time i read them but i haven’t actually read any of those collections since at least 2022. my favourite is the haunted book but there’s some stories i really loved in the cranes that built the cranes - memorably ‘michael’ and ‘isle of the wolf’ (another OCD work for the ages imo) especially. i read never trust a rabbit in a&e at about 4am and barely remember it so that one probably deserves a revisit 🙃

and umm i didn’t massively get on with the warlock effect because i’m not massively invested in magic or crime thrillers and i think the writing was noticeably worse 😞 idk if this was because he shared the writing duties with andy but it read clunkily to me - i do like ghost stories (the movie, not seen the play yet but i have tickets for this year!!) so maybe their dialogue works better in a spoken format? that said there were definitely parts i enjoyed and found interesting, it was just… not for me as a whole.

also as a warning jeremy is really not fantastic at writing female characters - you’ve gotta head in with that knowledge. i hadn’t even meaningfully engaged with feminism when i first read his stuff and i still had the sense something was off. like, come on man, you’ve got daughters…….. aren’t you interested in our interior lives at all……. perhaps we have more in common than you think 🥲🥲 the women in his books do pretty much exist in terms of what they mean to male characters LOL he’ll get there i’m sure 🫶

thanks for asking haha. that’s only scratching the surface of my thoughts i’m afraid

[i-have-rabies-dw]

Howdy hey!!! My name is Kitt or Ko <3

This is my blog to make friends, be myself, and find others who've lived similar lives to me! This is my only source of social interaction sooo bare with me

I'm 20, live in the United States, I usually use he/him pronouns, but I am genderfluid! I'm a nb transmasc living in one of the most rural areas of the continental US! I have no friends, this place is 30 or more years behind with respecting women/afab folk & lgbt acceptance <3

I'm a boydyke aspec lesboy! I'm not attracted to cis people, mostly attracted to trans men/enby individuals and transwomen occasionally. (But hmu worms, I still love you💔)

MDnis unless debating: Trans exclusionary feminists towards ftms, nb, mtfs, intersex folk in feminism (have always been apart of feminism), endo/"non trauma" systems (not real sry pick a struggle), npd abuse or insert any other mental health condition abuse believers, conservatives, zionists, exclusionary lgbtq folk (straight pandering much)

Dnis perrrriod: Radqueers, zoos/pedos/etc, under 18!

What's wrong with me? Wellll then, I have DID, BPD&Bipolar 1, ASD, (dx with all listed), NPD and other problematic mental health symptoms where idk what they stem from tbh. I don't bite, I pinky promise, genetics and life have really sucked! Obv looking for friends with these same disorders, especially systems with any of these conditions. If you're accepting of people who have these conditions and don't have them, I also wouldn't mind talking!

My Beloved Interests; Embroidery! It's my fav past time, keeps me sannne. I love many other types of creativity, story writing, traditional art (sketching&watercolors mostly), physical crafts, and singing/music/song writing! I'm a very outdoorsy person, love foraging, hiking, plant identification and practical uses, swimming, watching animals, I love love bugs. I also love gardening, love my plants sm <3. Cooking from scratch 2! I've never had a social life lmao

Shows/Movies - Bojack Horseman, Gravity Falls, •South Park•, Heather's the Movie&Musical, Them (2019), Hazbin but I don't like or support Vivian/Vivzi

Books - Stone Butch Blues, I know Why the Caged Bird Sings, Parable of the Sower, George Orwell Books <3... I have no Mouth, and I must Scream

Manga&Anime - The Promised Neverland, Danganronpa, Mekakucity Actors

Games: DETRIOT BECOME HUMAN!!!

Social Justice stuff - Free Palestine! Feminism, Trans-rights, LGBTQ+ rights, black lives matter, disabled folks rights&quality of life, pro-choice, elderly folk rights&qaulity of life, resistance against past and modern day colonialism and imperialism, addressing modern day civil rights injustices (racism, sexism, queerphobia is well alive). Separation of Church and state my beloved <3, fighting against cults and organized religion. Acknowledging, we are in the second civil rights era. Politically queer and punk.

Imma post about symptom stuff, memes, social justice related stuff (usually from historical evidence), embriodery related stuff, and yeah just whatever I'm up toooo (this blog is ran by a Kokichi Ouma fictive)

I can't respond to comments&dm rn (can respond to dms/asks)

[chilope]

top 5 books that made you the possum you are today?

ive been trying to decide how to answer this because theres like. the five books that made me the possum that i am but that i wouldnt necessarily recommend and then theres the top five books that i would recommend but that didnt necessarily have a profound impact on me.

changed my brain chemistry, not recommended:

speak by laurie halse anderson. listen im not gonna get into it but i happened to have spontaneously grabbed this book from the middle school library at the exact specific moment that i needed to read it and i credit it in many ways with my continued aliveness

an abundance of katherines by john green. PLEASE SEE SUBHEADING. but again, read it at basically the exact moment i needed to, i have never in my life related to a character more. reading it felt like having an adult grab me by the shoulders and tell me with absolute sincerity that everything was going to be fine. and i was like 18 and homeless and suicidal and scared to death constantly so it really helped.

edgar allen poe's poetry. not recommended because i have extremely mixed feelings about him as a person but he is also like. the reason i started liking poetry as a concept. so.

the selfish gene by richard dawkins. this is a good book and you should read it i just have beef with richard dawkins.

becoming dangerous edited by katie west and jasmine elliot, in particular the final essay (need to grab my copy to remember the name and author). idk listen. i go in for this kind of stuff. it speaks to me. it is not for everyone, in particular the mutuals i have here tend to be very anti-woo (reasonable) and this is very woo, so i dont recommend it. but i liked it a lot and it changed the way i thought about a bunch of things (my queerness, my spirituality, feminism, the way i relate to other women and my expectations of them). its a good book.

honorable mentions go to why does he do that, adult children of emotionally immature parents, the body keeps the score, etc, which have many many many many flaws and yet are also apparently good vehicles for understanding what the fuck is happening to you and like. reframing your experiences.

recommended and contributed in some meaningful way to my possumhood:

the redwall series by brian jacques. just straight up i cannot imagine what kind of person i would be if i hadn't read these growing up? genuinely difficult to wrap my head around that universe. these books are the background radiation coloring every aesthetic decision i have literally ever made. i actually have no idea if they hold up because i havent read then since i was like 12 but im choosing to believe they are still very good.

the persistent desire edited by joan nestle. the first queer history/theory book i ever read. idk man i dont really have an explanation for this one it just made me feel really seen and connected.

a thousand splendid suns by khaled hosseini. i dont really have an explanation for this one it just hit.

watership down by richard adams. again i cant really explain this one its just like. in there, you know? it will never come out.

its kind of a funny story by ned vizzini. this is another one of those ones that just sort of got claws in me and i never pulled them out. i still think about it a lot. its good, i recommend it if you can stomach ya still.

honorable mentions go to the poisonwood bible, the complete works of sherlock holmes, the lord of the rings/the hobbit, the grapes of wrath, the scarlet letter, matilda, the master and margherita, the child catchers, maus, the diary of anne frank, night, persepolis, 1984 (different reasons than usual), muted, fucking trans women, the red tent, black beauty, number the stars, the origin of species, and, i suspect it goes without saying, the torah. actually i dont really recommend the torah. but its effect is undeniable.

unfortunately the criteria was "made me the possum i am today" so the list skews toward books i read when i was younger, hence the ya and english class stuff. but this was a very fun jaunt down memory lane so thank you for asking :)

[redditreceipts]

I appreciate this blog. I'm a trans man who's generally very turned off by the way I've seen some radfem-aligned people talk about people like me. At the same time, I can't hang with the mainstream trans "discourse" and I have some beliefs that'd make me a thought criminal - eg, sex is immutable and largely binary (like, I know I'm a female, lol). I appreciate your levelheaded way of talking about these topics. I'd guess you'd still disagree with a lot of what I think about gender and stuff, but that's okay - I imagine you'd still respect me unlike how I'd get blasted by the trans community for certain things I think. Idk, I'm inarticulate, but I just wanted to say I think this blog is valuable.

Thank you so much! Yeah, I don't know much about wider discourse, but I myself have some moderate gender dysphoria and have thought about taking some steps towards transitioning in the past. I think I can kinda relate to being dysphoric to an extent that you feel that medical transition is the best option so yeah. Bodily autonomy is also one of the most important points in my feminism - and that translates to the option of medical transition of adults as well. (the only part of medical transition I'd object to is phalloplasty because of the horrendous rate of complications).

And you're not inarticulate! If you disagree with something I say, feel free to point that out :) I have not transitioned and there are parts of transitioning that I don't know that much about

also, here is my small but still surprisingly large collection of images of capybara-themed birthday cakes:

[bdbdbdbdmn]

it's whatever and fine but this one time on here there was a comic about a [assumed cis] guy character with boobs and how it was funny for a dude to have tits and the reblogs turned it into a trans thing that was all fun and stuff but the thing is that someone decided that his pronouns should be he/they (like just "and his pronouns are he/they!" and that's it in the middle of a conversation on a post about a guy not wanting to be seen as less of a man for his chest size). on account of him being the guy with large breasts. instead of he/him like in the comic. and you know me, i love and support all headcanons and genders and pronouns etc., and there's also no proof that it was done maliciously, but i just find it interesting how turning "what if guy with boobies lol weird" into "that's a trans guy and they're not as much of a guy actually, you can tell by the huge honkers which are so funny because they're so big" was seen as like. an improvement. maybe it was just someone who related and was projecting the they/them part, but it feels like this potentially came from the devaluing of transmasculinity and forced feminization (NOT taking about the kink kind rn) and binary association of nonbinary people. like why is it less good for him to just be a guy? why do you [allegedly] think he/they is more breast-y and boobish? the comic guy can still be he/they idc but it feels to me in my opinion like you're seeing boobs and they/them as feminine and trans men as being unfortunate losses bc they're males (aka not Pure Females, the best gender). idk. clearly i personally hc him as he/him and hyper dysphoric lmao

this feeling can peacefully co-exist with my opinion that you can hc tomboys as transmasc btw bc firstly i still think this is fine too, but also bc the discussed masc female characters are shown as enjoying and feeling at home within masculinity and such and this guy was shown as clearly distraught over emasculation that was out of his control (not that you need to justify a hc but this is a just in case point). it just seems like a Weird Time to bring it up. "i'm uncomfortable being seen of as less of a man due to my anatomy" "i see... have you tried being nonbinary?" vs "i love being masc" "i love you being masc too. really love it." idk man. idk it sounds like i got a solid case for my feelings not being stupid and evil here. emphasis on the word feelings, i never got any opinions from this i just used my old ones to figure out why it felt odd to me. also a better metaphor that relates transmasc hcs of tomboys to the pronoun hc of this comic is if a female character was for some reason forcemasced and did nothing but complain and feel embarrassed and wish to be seen as a feminine woman and ask to be allowed to do normal girl things and y'all went "wow great tomboy representation!" "actually he's transmasc!" but that's not how transmasc hcers think or act so so it would be a false equivalency which is why my opinion in favor of transmasc hcs of tomboy characters still stands.

am i out of touch on this Thursday or no is it that it is the children who are wrong? (double meme reference but genuine question)

[balkanradfem]

Hello, I have an issue and I don't really have anyone to talk to about that specific thing. I stopped waxing my body hair two years ago when I stumbled across radical feminism on tumblr, and it's been amazing! My confidence is through the roof and I stopped caring about men. Except. For the body hair. I mean, I still don't shave or anything. But I have very thick body hair due to hormonal issues and repeated waxing/shaving since I was 12. Especially on my chin where I have very thick duvet. I caved and allowed my mother to pay for laser hair removal. But it makes me crazy because I want to do it all over now. I used to swim regularly but I lost my only swimsuit where my "luscious" pubic hair was not visible (kind of... it basically goes halfway down my thigh) and they are really rare and expensive, most swimsuits are basically pubic hair out. And even while I had that one, I was very uncomfortable with my armpit hair which is literally longer than my hair. I have my hair until my ears but still, that's really long. Do you have advice, or I don't know really, stuff to make me change my mind about pubic/armpit hair and laser hair removal? I know it's not good for skin, causes skin cancer I think? But I feel so alone and idk, like a hairy beast. It gets lonely.

Ah I can relate to being scrutinized and judged in public for your body hair, even if I don't have the extra hormonal, but I remember struggling to feel normal and always feeling like I'm being watched.

I can only offer a part of what helped me: there's actually no law stating that you have to wear a woman's swimming suit on the beach or anywhere else. I wear swimming trunks and a whole t-shirt when I'm swimming and nobody has said one word to me, and I've felt super comfortable in those! It's not very eye-drawing and it's great for a transition before you are able to feel comfortable - or in some cases, if there's males around, I understand never being able to feel comfortable because they will objectify you, but that has nothing to do with your body hair, that's just the way they are.

But you don't have to wear swimming clothing that's been designed for male fantasies and fetishes, you can absolutely make or get something that makes you comfortable and un-selfconscious.

It does take years and years to become comfortable with body hair, even the normal amount. I remember at one point realizing that what I'm having, the full body hair, is normal, and being completely shaved and bare is weird, mimicking children's immature bodies, and also making your body vulnerable to infections and diseases, as well as causing discomfort. Most of body hair we have is so that our skin wouldn't chafe together, to make our movement more comfortable! So seeing women shaved naked makes me uncomfortable, I know they're undergoing discomfort, itching, bleeding, chafing, prickling and all other stuff that comes with shaving. Seeing a woman with full body hair just makes me relax and I feel so happy that she's comfortable too. Being completely shaved to me is a sign of oppression.

And later when I became even more comfortable, the thought of being a bit more repulsive and unpalatable to males made me happy. It's slightly harder to objectify a woman who is fully comfortable and unwilling to mimic a child's body with her own. So I'm displaying full freedom from their desires in front of them and don't have to care. I am however, still sad for all the women who can't do it, and are undergoing discomfort only to be slightly more palatable to their oppressors.

I don't know if my opinions can help you see it in a different way at all, it was a long journey for me, and the best I can say is, take your time. It's okay if it takes a decade to feel fully comfortable, I believe that you'll get there! There's nothing but comfort and joy waiting for you at the end of it.

[diabeticgirl4]

(Silly gender musings under the cut, feel free to ignore)

( For the record I'm afab and have been comfortable id'ing as cis female my entire life. Just for context ig )

Honestly it's amazing I never connected my lifelong (mild) chest dysphoria to my gender before. I barely have any chest (A size) and I still dislike it. Not enough to Do Anything about it, but enough that wearing anything akin to a normal bra (and not my usual sports bras) makes me feel Uncomfy.

(I distinctly remember overhearing a conversation in 10th grade where a girl in my class was talking about getting breast reduction and while I wasn't necessarily 'jealous', there was definitely a "huh" feeling about that, like I didn't know that could even be an option. And I never re-explored that feeling until basically this month LOL.)

So I was never a tomboy, never a girly-girl (I could probably count on both hands the number of times I voluntarily wore makeup outside of a required event- and nearly everyone case was a friend/family member excitedly asking if they could do my makeup and I said sure why not lol. Turns out I love wearing makeup, but only for special occasions and no way in heck am I gonna do it myself lmao), I just felt. Neutral. Average. Casual. Nothing outside the 'norm' (LOL).

Another fun time was discovering voidpunk (while not a requirement, most members self identified as AAA- aro/ace/agender), and I remember thinking how cool it was and how much I related to most of the content "except I'm not agender like them, bummer" (lol)

I've mentioned it before, but likening this whole Self Discovery to my aroace awakening?? It was such a struggle bc how do you examine the absence of something.

Same thing w my gender I'm realizing. Thought I was just an average female who didn't connect to traditional femininity but in a weird way it felt fine and normal? (Tbf I kinda grew up in the rise of feminism where girls were finally getting comfortable w the idea of not having to be 100% feminine and wear dresses and makeup and dress/live to impress boys etc etc etc meanwhile I was like "yeah so what I never cared about that stuff anyways lol."

And weirdly the humanity introspection came up way before the gender introspection?? Again for the record I'm autistic (self-realized shortly after college, which fricked me up a bit- but that's a whole nother thing LOL), so I never rly clicked w other ppl. Never fit in, never felt like "one of the girls" but I was 10000% not even remotely close to feeling like a guy so I never questioned it. It wasn't till the last couple years or so where I was like "huh I REALLY don't feel like I fit in anywhere. Like in society in general. Like at all." Part autism, part social anxiety, part only child/introvert/etc, but I just never clicked w ppl in general. Therefore my conclusion was "I must not be human, got it" (/hj). Exploring theriantypes and fursonas (#deer self), stuff like that, and I think I eventually realized the connection that "wait a minute. Could these feelings of not relating to other ppl of my gender..... mean something??" (Cue laugh track)

Which got me looking into labels, and kinda resonated w demigirl a bit? Like I'm not Not a girl (points to username), but the lack of connection to any femininity in general felt too much to not be nothing. Started digging deep into "well what gender Do I feel?" And..... I realized I don't? I've lived life as a cis female and have always been fine w that (ngl would love a flat chest tho;;;;), but idk the Gender Feelings? What even are those? Again. Back to the "how do you examine the lack of something".

I started looking into agender memes and content and?? It kinda clicks?? It's weird to me that of all the times I thought about my gender in the past I never came to this conclusion. Like huh maybe the fact that I don't connect w the gender binary. Means I could quite possibly be. NonBinary. What a thought lmao.

Anyways circling back for the millionth time, I'm still figuring out labels and how I want to identify and if I even want to change anything or whatnot, and wow it's a lot.

I like demigirl and agender all while still kinda being cis female? Sure? I guess? Lol?

Not giving up she/her pronouns, considering they/them (apparently one of my mom's friends- whom I've known for a good number of years- once referred to me as a "they" (quoting my mom lmao) and I've always kinda felt 👀 since), and contemplating it/its pronouns. Like heck yeah I am not a human and I don't want to be referred to as one lol.

She/they/it???? 🤔

Anyways wow what a wild ride lol

[simcardiac-arrested]

sorry i saw your cat thing and this isn't quite related but my mom loves cats but she will be like "oh yeah dogs are stupid and gross and whatever" and now she has a cat that i swear is like a little dog as a cat. she drools and is crazy and she LOVES this cat so much . but still hates dogs. GIRL WHAT!!!!!!!!! it drives me crazy

anyways mostly to say i HATEEE the cat vs dog stuff. i love cats and i love dogs. they are two sides of the same coin. they have so many parallels. i dont even know how to articulate it this might be too out there but it feels to me the like. idfk but when feminism stops being feminism and is like men are EVIL BIOLOGICALLY and shit like. it's a dog. its an animal same as the cat. you dont HAVE to like it but it's an animal with qualities very similar to the things you love in cats. have peace and love in whimsy in your heart for all animals even if you don't personally like them . sorry i had to go on a crazy rant but like that kind of shit makes me SOOO MAD if you're over 13 years old saying that youre crazy

NO I KNOW BECAUSE I WAS TALKING WITH MY ADULT ASS FRIENDS ABOUT IT AND THEY WERE LIKE “why do you hate cats” WDYM??? bitch that’s a whole different sentence!!!! if i like orange more than green that doesn’t mean i hate green they are both my fav colors i just like orange more!!! God!!

ur so right tho it’s so fucking weird when people treat dogs as some sort of biologically evil animal that will turn on you for a treat (or because it’s old GODDD bc my friend was telling me why she doesn’t like dogs and it’s bc her dog grew old and confused and yk probably had some brain deterioration going on and bit her. and also bc dogs have rabies while cats don’t so cats are objectively better??? THATS THE THING THEY WERE ALL TRYING TO PROVE TO ME HOW EVEN OBJECTIVELY CATS WERE BETTER LMAOOOO LIKE WHY THE FUCK SHOULD I CARE !!! I LIKE DOGS DUDE !!!! SUBJECTIVELY !!!! but yeah srsly don’t get me started about how people treat old/sick dogs… just terrible) combined with that and the thing with ur mom im like 80% convinced some cat people are such dog haters because dogs require way more attention and care and responsibility and because they’re not nearly as small and cute as cats. people will be like ewwww small dogs are ugly and evil and gross but then go and cuddle some small cat/kitten as if it won’t also shit on you!!!! IDK IF ANY OF THIS IS COHERENT THIS SORT OF THING SERIOUSLY BAFFLES ME SO MUCH but u get me remy. u undersyand

[customboytoyz]

on the forcedfem side, but, I got a buddy who's into this stuff and wanna know some tips or ideas since I'm, again, used to the opposite and hadn't even known there was a forcedmasc community out here and you're like the CEO of it to me right now LMFAOAOAO

*tips as in for writing, should've clarified this sooner. is it okay if I were to pull some inspo from your posts?? I just want to be 100% sure so I'm not like, idk, infringing your content and shit

**and, one more question, I know forcedmasc is the opposite of forcedfem but like... how different is it?? I guess??? I don't have many ideas or concepts for scenarios or prompts for this genre so it's harder for me to conceptualize anything without trying to reach for the feminization beam LMFAO

Super sorry if this is inconvenient or too undescriptive to make sense of anything, you're the first blog I've seen though talking about it, and considering how your blog is centered on it no less had me thinking you'd be the best place to start on learning so I can make accurate works for my buddy

I literally could not relate less to the problem that you are having so I don't know about writing advice. honored to be the ceo 😛😇

I think my best advice is to just. see masculinity as a humiliating thing that women are terrified to be. and think about all the hottest men traits you like and what you can make them have (why do u think i like tattoo posting >:) there needs to be more tattoo shop porn) basically don't force anything (ha ha haaa). It's supposed to be for you not anybody else. and if u wanna throw a little feminization in there then do it (it's more popular anyway lmao)

idc if you take inspiration from my posts though. in fact I want people to do it a lot more so i can seeee them and jack off to themmmmm