#incorrect cm

[magical-ethan]

Jack most definitely introduced it to Hotch first so he could play with his dad no matter where he was in the world because wifi + an account = minecraft. Then Rossi caught Hotch playing it on his phone and decided to figure out the game so he could join and be better than Hotch. And this snowballed until everyone had their own account and worlds they play together like how siblings make different worlds depending on which other sibling or friend is playing with them. But they all like their collective world (that includes Jack and Henry) that's titled "Home" because they know that no matter where their team is, if they are playing the world, they are home.

*the BAU playing minecraft* 

Emily, getting knocked off a horse after failing to tame it again: oh my god, you bitch! 

Reid: why is the green thing sparkling- oh. i died. 

Penelope: I HAVE SO MANY CATS AND WOLVES. *happy noises* 

*Derek laughing mischievously* 

JJ, gasps: why is my house on fire?!!! 

JJ: derek!! put the flint and steal away already! that’s the third time you set something on fire!  

Hotch: how did you get the diamond tools? 

Rossi: i spawned them in. what? did you want me to use the wooden ones? 

Hotch: how do you spawn things in?

Rossi, snorts: newb. 

CHAT: SPENCER_REID FELL FROM A HIGH PLACE

JJ BURNED ALIVE

A_HOTCHNER STARVED TO DEATH

EMILY BLEW UP

[lazyclumzycat-blog]

I can almost hear her say that

[lilliejareau]

“we listen and we don’t judge.”

penelope: one time reid gave me a tiny potted plant but it turns out it was actually plastic and he didn’t know so i pretended to water it for three years.

bau: we listen and we don’t judge.

JJ: sometimes when Henry wakes me up by jumping on my back, I feel like throwing him across the room for a split second.

bau: we listen and we don’t judge.

emily: one time when I was mad at Morgan for not sticking up for me during a case, I dipped his travel toothbrush in the toilet and didn’t rinse it off after and he used it about an hour later.

morgan: bitch what?!?

emily: we listen and we don’t judge!

[sarcasm-and-stiles]

[criminalmindsfanantic]

Emily, crying laughing: JJ was on a conference call and I just heard her say the words “which part of the ‘No’ did you not understand - the ‘nuh’ part or the ‘oh’ part?”

Emily: She’s out here rejecting bureaucrats the same way she tells Michael and Henry they can’t have snacks 😂

[thedelusionalbitchgianna]

Emily: ARE YOU-

Morgan: Fucking.

Emily: KIDDING ME?! YOU-

Morgan: Fucking.

Emily: IDIOT!

Spencer: …What was that?

Morgan: Hotch banned Emily from swearing, so I’m helping her out.

[emilyshotchrocket]

Hotch: What are you doing in the kitchen at three Am?

Emily: I was gonna light this chicken on fire and see if it turns into one of those Harry Potter Phoenix things.

Hotch:

Hotch: listen, I'm gonna give you the number of my therapist, tell her I sent you.

Emily: your therapist quit last week.

Hotch:

Hotch: listen, I'm gonna find us both a new therapist.

[mywilltodie]

Prentiss: If Reid and I were drowning, who would you save?

Hotch: You two can’t swim?

Prentiss: It’s a hypothetical question, Hotch! Who would you save?

Hotch: My time and effort.

[forhappysake]

[demonicbaby666]

Derek: How’d the doctors appointment go? Reid: Actually really well, she said I was super artistic. Derek: Kid… I think she meant- Garcia: Don’t you dare.

[miss-soph-star]

Jemily x Daughter Reader (Saving You)

☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾

TW: Usual CM type violence/ topics, kidnapping and torcher - Emily, JJ and the team rescue a young girl from her abductor...what will happen next...

☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾

Emily Prentiss had seen lots during her time with the BAU, she had seen the best and worst humanity had to offer, though often the latter. Emily was used to adjusting to demanding environments, yet nothing could prepare her for the teams next case and how her world was about to be turned upside down forever.

Two phones rang out simultaneously, illuminating Emily’s bedroom framing both her and her wife in a faint glow. The noise prompting an exhausted groan from beneath the crisp white bed linen in which Emily and Jennifer shared. Emily rolled over partially awake, her hand grasping out to stop the incessant ringing, “Prentiss?” The other voice rang through the speaker with urgency, “We’ve got a case.” Emily groaned, “Yes Hotch we are on our way.” Hanging up Emily turning towards her wife, gentle hands shaking Jennifer, who had been completely oblivious to the phone buzzing beside her, awake. “Jen honey, Hotch called we have case.” Jen wiggled back into Emily’s front, her usual position, needing Emily’s warmth as she sighed from sleep deprivation as she arose. “Mmm morning Em.” Emily laughed at JJ’s horse, yet cute morning voice as she sat up rubbing the sleep from her eyes, still seeking the safety of Emily’s frame. Emily pulled her into a quick hug, leaving a small kiss on her forehead before getting up grabbing her suit from the wardrobe and in the process handing JJ hers. “Thank you honey.” Emily blushed at the sincerity; it was the small moments of gratitude that made her fall even further in love with JJ each time.

On the way to their SUV Emily and JJ grabbed themselves a croissant and coffee from the kitchen, before stepping out into the crisp dawn light, the sun had barely set, let alone risen and Emily could only guess it was around 4 am. During the ride to work, JJ rest her head against the window drifting in and out of sleep whilst reaching over the centre console grasping Emily’s thigh as if making sure she would not leave, a common ritual Emily adored about JJ. Emily smiled softly at the sentiment as they set off towards Quantico.

Upon arrival, Emily placed a kiss on her wife’s cheek waking her from her nap, as she pulled the car into the parking garage. “Good morning again honey. We’re at work now come on.” JJ rolled her eyes and pecked Emily’s lips before jumping out of the car towards the building, scanning in as they were ushered towards the conference room, where Hotch waited to brief the team. Reid and Garcia already sat alongside Rossi and Morgan, waiting for everyone to arrive.

When everyone was seated Hotch briefly outlined the nature of the case due to its urgency, a family annihilator, both parents murdered, and the child missing with no sightings so far. The team were informed that this specific unsub had attacked four other families and that the missing children were only abducted for a matter of days before they were found the same way as their parents, meaning the current missing child was the main priority of the team. Garcia wished the team good luck as they made their way to the SUV’s following her intel on the child’s whereabouts. The child was said to be being held hostage amidst a row of abandoned warehouses on the outskirts of town, the spot was perfect, both isolated and vast meaning the team had to work quickly not only to capture the unsub, but to find the child. Emily and JJ, Derek and Reid, Hotch and Rossi jumping in their respective vehicles approaching the area with haste. Emily and JJ arrived first, followed in quick succession by Derek and Reid who followed their lead.

Upon arrival, Emily and the team found themselves weaving through dirty corridors filled by rows of metal shutters, discarded machinery and litter, perfect places to hide a victim. As they got deeper into the warehouse a faint whimpering could be heard, that of a scared child. They followed the noise closer and closer, before spotting the unsub in the distance. Derek and Reid split from Emily and JJ entering the alternate entrance intercepting him swiftly, as Emily and JJ ran towards the room the young girl was being held in.

Kicking opening the door Emily could see the child covering her head, her knees under her chin cowering, with rope around her wrists and dirt covering her tiny body. Emily approached slowly and JJ took a step back not wanting to scare the child further. “Hi sweetheart, we’re here to help you. I’m Emily and this is my partner JJ. What’s your name?” She child looked up at Emily, her tearstained face illuminated by the little light entering the room. She studied Emily and JJ as Emily pulled out her badge showing the girl she was here to help. “See honey, we are here to help you. I’m with the FBI.” After tense few moments anxious in thought, the girl gave a small nod allowing Emily to come closer to undoing the restraints around her wrists. Reassured by the comfort, the young girl reached out allowing Emily to pick her up, before hiding her face against Emily’s neck. JJ guided them out of the warehouse and soon enough directed the duo towards the paramedics waiting to check over the girl for any injuries.

“Hey honey, these nice people just want to make sure you’re not sick okay?” JJ pointed over towards the medics but the girl whimper pulling closer to Emily, grabbing onto her jacket not allowing anyone to come between her and the only person she trusted. Emily reassured her placing her in a tighter hold, “It’s okay honey I’m not letting you go, I’ll come with you.” With that the girl relaxed marginally, allowing Emily to sit in the Ambulance, placing her on her lap to get checked over. With a few checks the medic stated, “She’s medically cleared to travel with you, but I’ll put some Neosporin on her wrists as they look a little sore.” The medic reached over attempting to apply the antiseptic to the girl’s wrists, but she batted his hands away, shaking her head as her lip began trembling. Seeing the child’s fear JJ stepped in suggesting, “Will you let Emily help you honey?” To this suggestion the young girl nodded, reaching out her arms to Emily to help fix the grazes and bruising. “Thank you for trusting me honey.” Emily praised earning a small smile from the child who rested her head against her chest. “Hey, honey you’re going to ride with me and JJ back to our work okay?” The child identified now as y/n pointed towards the black SUV before looking towards Emily inquisitively. “Yes that’s right love, that’s our car. JJ’s going to drive and we can sit in the back together. Does that sound okay?” Emily gave the child time to answer, she nodded giving a small wave to JJ before Emily scooped her up walking towards the car.

Approaching the car with y/n firmly planted in Emily’s arms, the couple shared knowing glanced with each other, y/n completely unaware of their thoughts. JJ opened the door for Emily allowing her to climb into the back with y/n, buckling both herself and the child in whilst JJ climbed into the passenger seat starting the engine. Once on the road back to Quantico, y/n, who could not be sat on Emily’s knee leaded against Emily cuddling into her side, grasping her hand as she slowly drifted in and out of sleep due to her exhaustion. Each time she arose Emily gently encourage her back to sleep, softly lulling her and stroking the back of her hand, as JJ occasionally glanced at the duo through the rear view mirror, smiling to herself at the site of her wife becoming more maternal by the minute.

☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ☾

Tag List: @olderwomenenthusiast @m-1234-5

[spencestiel-michelle]

Emily: i saw one of those inflatable tube men with the wavy arms and the air dancing- dressed up as an italian chef.

Emily: and i thought: wow. look at rossi, he’s really getting desperate for money.

Rossi: 

[lazyclumzycat-blog]

[lilliejareau]

emily: reid is NOT allowed at my second funeral. he just told me i’d be having an open casket to “be sure”.

[sarcasm-and-stiles]

Reid: *sneaks into the house late*

Hotch: *turns in swivel chair* care to tell me where you were?

Reid: I was at a…foreign film festival with…uh…Y/N!

Y/N: *also turns in swivel chair* Want to try again?

[criminalmindsfanantic]

JJ: *Hugs Emily from behind*

JJ: *Tucks Emily’s hair behind their ear*

JJ, whispering: Eat my cheetos again and they'll never find your body.