#incorrect game of thrones

[inncorrect-starklings]

NedCat: {About to get physical}

Sansa: Hi! Since you almost done dressing Father? How about we head to school early? I’ll check my hair and meet you in the car.

Ned: {sighs} Cat, I’ll be back in two hours, tops.

Catelyn: We decide who does what, when you get back.

[lislemons]

asoiaf characters as posts that remind me of them part 23

[sasha-naell]

Catelyn : So this is my first son, Robb and then we have my second

Jon :

Catelyn : Sansa. Then we have Arya, Bran and Rickon. Then we have Theon.

Jon : Oh come on !

Catelyn : Then we have the dogs.

Jon : OH COME ON !!!

[hyacinths-bridgerton]

Rickon: *sends a super low-quality meme to the group chat*

Arya: if i had a dollar for every pixel in this image, i’d have 15 cents

Rickon: if i had a dollar for every ounce of rage i felt in my body after i read this text, i would have enough money to buy a cannon to fire at you

Sansa: Actually I did the math, Arya would have $225, not $0.15

Robb: If I had a dollar I would buy a can of soda :)

Theon: while you’re there could you buy me an apply juice please?

Robb: Sorry I only have a dollar

Theon: :(

Bran: hey I just realized sansa is wrong, arya would have $22'500 because it's a dollar for every pixel, not a cent

Robb: If I had $22'500 I would buy a can of soda and an apply juice

Rickon: you can buy anything you want with $22'500

Arya: yeah and he wants soda and apply juice

Jon: Apply juice to what

Theon: directly to the forehead

Sansa: Great chat everyone

[shining-m00nlight]

Some time ago in the Vale:

Ned: Well, who cuts people's hair in the middle of the night?

Robert: I do! They call me the Midnight Barber.

Ned: Yeah, well that's an infringement of people's liberties. So don't ever be doing that to me.

Robert: I DO do it to you.

Ned: ...what?

Robert: Who d'you think cuts your hair, Maester?

Ned: My hair just doesn't grow very fast

Robert: What, you think it stays that length naturally? I'm in there in the night, styling away.

Ned: How dare you do that to me in the night, when I'm oblivious.

Robert: I do my best work when you're oblivious. I lean you up against the pillow, and I go at you.

Ned: That's perverted!

[mayberobbsa]

Robb: *sends Sansa a picture of himself giving a thumbs up in an empty room with rows of empty seats behind him* Look at all the people who want to marry you!

Sansa: … But you’re in the picture

Robb: Did I stutter?

[doingthisbecauseofboredom]

Somewhere in the afterlife:

Robb: You were married to Tywin Lannister the most ruthless man in Westeros!?

Joanna: He wasn’t the most ruthless man in Westeros when I was married to him!

[catboyarmand]

Jon, studying for an exam with Robb and Theon: Robb: Fuck, it's morning already! What are we going to do? Jon: Well, maybe we could start with calming down. Robb: Calm down? We're still on Aegon the Conquerer! We haven't so much looked at the Shivers! Jon: You've got the gist. They got the shivers. Theon: Well, I can't tell my rebellions from my risings. Jon, getting stressed: And whose fault's that? If you lot had stopped invading us for five fucking minutes there'd be a lot less to wade through, you Ironborn prick!

[random-note]

When they find the wolf pups:

Ned: I wonder what this could mean, the parent wolf killed by a stag’s horns?

Later at Kings-landing:

Ned about to be executed by Joffrey in part because of how shit of a king Robert was: So that’s what it meant!

[eddieheart]

Jon: *to gendry*

Jon: you’re not fat

Gendry: and you’re not tall

[hauntedbythenarrative]

[inncorrect-starklings]

Margaery: you look like my first wife

Sansa: oh! I, um uh, didn’t know you were married before

Margaery: I wasn’t

[lislemons]

asoiaf characters as posts that remind me of them part 22

[sasha-naell]

Catelyn : So there are these two guys who are in love with me. There is one that my little sister is in love with, and the other I prefer his brother. So my crush has like 200 crushes (no seriously this guy is attracted to everyone) and he has a best friend who is like simp a little for my crush's sister. Except that my crush's sister really likes the little cousin of my crush's best friend, and it's mutual. Except that the little cousin of my crush's best friend is already married to a girl and this girl has a crush on the little brother of my crush's best friend and her best friend has a crush on my crush. So it obviously becomes a little complicated.

Brynden : Yeah I understand.

Hoster : HOW ??

[hyacinths-bridgerton]

Gendry: so when are you going out with me?

Arya: i don't know, gendry, when are you asking me?

Gendry: hm

later

Hot Pie: SO YOU JUST RAN AWAY??!?!

Gendry: I DIDN'T EXPECT HER TO FLIRT BACK!!!!

[shining-m00nlight]

Rickon, holding a python: Guys I impulsively bought a snake, what do I name him?

Robb: You did WHAT–

Arya: William Snakepeare