#midlife reflection

[luckysheepharmony]

I just got into several interesting conversations on fanfiction writers unite community where we discussed relationship to creativity and writing process. One of the things that interested me was how people give and receive feedback on AO3, I've been reading that negative feedback on there is not encouraged because the person has been generous with their creativity sharing a fic and it might be experienced by others as hurtful.

Another conversation we were having was about me being a middle aged woman probably twice the age of most people on here. I don't mind critical feedback, I believe for me personally it is because I've reached the age where I DGAF (less than before) about what people think because I am more comfortable in who I am, whereas when I was younger my self concept was a lot more brittle and I would have really shrivelled up if I has put my creativity out there and others had picked it apart. That doesn't mean to say I won't take feedback on board, just that I can critically engage with it more without taking it personally.

Because of my self critical voice and worries about how others my respond to my writing, this actually blocked me from writing for over a decade despite being encouraged by my wife and family. It's wonderful to be part of a community where people are joining together to create and I feel like being in a community like this is inspiring me to grow my creative muscles. Like being in a gym of creativity and you are all my workout partners 😜.

I wanted to share a poem by Philip Larkin about being young that resonated with my own experience of that time, the brittleness but also strength and clarity of purpose that I think gets more muddied as you get older. (Think of inside out, when sadness touches the joyful core memories and they become a blend of joy/sad, because Riley thinks back of that time, which she will never have again). I want to encourage any young people out there who are mired in self doubt or feel they are not good enough to attempt to push through: what you create is beautiful and valuable. Everything has its place in the world, and should not just be measured by its potential financial value in this capitalist hellscape we are all forced to inhabit: which this corner of the internet gives us some welcome respite from ❤️

[ourlittlehouseinthecountry]

I wrote something gentle this week—a reflection on what it’s looked like (and felt like) to start learning to be kinder to myself. Because maybe you’ve been there too: where rest feels like a luxury, stillness feels suspicious, and your worth feels tangled up in doing.Just a little reminder from me (and my coffee cup) that you don’t have to earn your rest. You don’t have to fix it all. You don’t have to rush your healing. This week's blog post is a gentle reflection on learning to be kinder to myself—because sometimes, the bravest thing we can do is speak softly to ourselves when we want to shout. If you're feeling a bit wobbly or just need a kind word today, I wrote this for you. You can read the full post via the link in my bio or check out stories—it's waiting there for you with a warm mug and a deep breath. Let me know if it resonates, or share it with someone who might need a little softness today too. You’re doing better than you think. #NewBlogPost #LearningToBeKinderToMyself #GentleLiving #SlowLivingMovement #MentalWellbeing #BurnoutRecovery #MindfulMoments #SelfKindnessMatters #SelfCompassion #EmotionalHealing #MidlifeMagic #CozyReflections #WellbeingJourney #SimpleLiving #RestIsProductive #KindnessCounts #OurLittleHouseInTheCountry

[hhtpakistan]

Midlife isn’t a crisis—it’s a DIY revolution. Discover why it takes half your life to realize you’re the builder of your own story. 🌟 #MidlifeAwakening #DIYLife #Reinvention

[libriffybookstore]

https://libriffy.com/product/finding-a-career-path-after-a-midlife-career-change/

[taoofraychela]

IG gave me my account back. Apparently I was flagged as spam. Even though I rarely make a post or comment. But okay.

So now I ask myself what moving with intention on social media is for me. Because today I sat in therapy and told my therapist the very stupid story of the deactivation of my IG and how it made me contemplate things.

Where my energy was going. How I was carry around the imprint of 10+ years of my past. How I had realized that the human brain is capable of letting go of past traumas if it is not constantly reminded and if we aren't constantly curating our digital footprints, it has the ability to send constant reminders to our brains about things that maybe we wouldn't think about as often without those subtle reminders.

It is like that, how we let people into our lives via social media that maybe we would have kept out... the old coworkers or classmates who no longer reasonate with us. Relationships that wouldn't survive otherwise, even if they are just a random laughing reaction on a post every 7 months relationship.

I remember my mom bringing up my elementary school best friend and how maybe it could be cool if I found her on social media and got back in touch with her. My last memories of this girl were not necessarily warm fuzzy ones. And also? We were friends from kindergarten to 4th grade. 4 years of my life. As a very young child. I straight up told my mom it was too silly for me to entertain at this stage of my life. Just because we can possibly find anyone we have ever encountered on social media, doesn't mean we should.

I realized I don't have to keep carrying the past with me. Stupidly enough, it was the IG account loss that really drilled that point home. Who would have thought? I've been in therapy for like 3.5 years trying to get my brain to understand that and all it needed was meta to temporarily pull the plug on me.

I don't need to constantly be reminded that my husband almost died. I don't need to constantly be reminded that I had a scary pregnancy.

I don't need to constantly be reminded that I had a horrible collection of injuries to my body that left me hopeless for far too long.

I don't need to constantly be reminded what steps I had to take in my journey towards healing. I lived it, I know.

I don't need to constantly be reminded that some people died. I live with the loss each day.

And I don't need the constant reminders that this world is fucked. Thus I need to curate my feeds to turn off the impossible bullshit I can't change and focus on the things that I can change. I don't need the rage bait. And I don't need the actual rage.

I've struggled with this since I grew up enough to realize how screwed up this world is. That space between being informed and just feeling awful because... what can we do? And that's the thing, if it isn't action, what good is just the emotion of rage? Depression? Hopelessness? Our brain gives us these things so we feel compelled to act. Social media gives us these emotions towards nothing that can be acted upon.

Facebook is easy for me, because I don't follow a lot of pages or anything and I'm just not a facebook person.

My neighbor has a solution I like in theory, and that is to delete the apps and just redownload them 1x a week to check in... and then delete them and stay off the shit the rest of the week. I think that might be worth a try.

I'm culling my following list massively... which... I've heard you gotta do slowly or else the moderating bots might ban you again because they think you are a bot (good lord meta you fucking suck).

I'm getting rid of the news pages, have decided I will get my news from a dedicated source that isn't attached to social media. Like my news consumption will be intentional... not.... here's a picture of a flower, a cat, there's a country getting bombed, here's a garden, here's some dumb shit Trump said. It fucks with your brain to consume it in that way. I don't think my head will ever be right after watching a genocide unfold on on my phone.

I think I'm going to use that thing on my phone, that sets an amount of time to use an app daily and that is that.

I am going to routinely ask myself... what can I be doing instead of social media if the urge to go on social media strikes. I deeply want to use my life for things that bring me joy, not killing time staring at my phone just because it's something i got used to doing.

I was trying to explain everything to my therapist today and when I was done she was like "damn you're making me want to go and delete my IG" but now that I've seen this impact of the energy of a digital footprint, I can't unsee it.

And I unsee myself.... and see myself at the same time. Untethered from a story that I have long been building and telling myself. A story that needed to be coherent for an imaginary audience. It all needed to make sense. And for who? Me? I don't know. And yet it always makes sense in the most imperfect ways.

I finally feel unblended from the traumatic shit life has thrown at me for the first time in a way that i can really appreciate it. Which is amazing because this time last year I was still very much in the thick of it.

I am and always have been a whole person with complex feelings about a whole lot of things. I have also come to realize that that just by being a whole person I am and always have been enough. But I didn't always know that. More importantly, I have never held that as truth in my life until now. Instead I was always looking to be enough. To be good enough. To be enough for my mom, my dad, my sister, my brother, my teachers, my spouse, my kid, my employers, anyone who would ever hold space with me ever. I've lived my entire life feeling too little for the people in it. Always.

I am very much at the midpoint of my life. Not having a crisis but for the very first time, asking who am I. Not, what do these people want from me and how can I give it to them... but what do I want and how can I get it for myself

[sehrmerkwuerdig]

In der Mitte der Reise unseres Lebens befand ich mich in einem dunklen Wald, in dem der gerade Weg verloren war.

Dante aus "Die göttliche Komödie"

[timewithnatalie]

Why Women Over 40 Struggle to Achieve Their Goals | Time With Natalie

Are you over 40 and still chasing your dreams? In this video, I’ll uncover the 5 biggest reasons women struggle to achieve their goals and how you can overcome them. Whether it’s fear of failure, lack of time, or distractions, I’ve got practical solutions to help you succeed. Let’s make your dreams a reality!

[laidbackmarco]

What if I achieve my dreams and still feel unhappy?

[parwatisingari]

From YOLO to Oh-No

Life’s Chaotic Climb and Spiritual U-Turns Life’s Rollercoaster: From Childlike Dreams to Midlife Crises and Beyond When we’re kids, life seems limitless. At 18, as we step onto the threshold of adulthood, we are handed this invisible badge that says, Welcome to Adulthood, Now Figure It Out. Expectations multiply faster than WhatsApp groups during wedding season, and while the world is brimming…

[ourlittlehouseinthecountry]

Some seasons of life are loud and busy and blooming. And others… are quieter. Messier. A little lonelier. This week on the blog, I’m writing about the lonely side of personal growth—those in-between seasons where you’ve let go of what no longer fits, but haven’t quite settled into what comes next. It’s about what it feels like to step away from old roles, old identities, old expectations—and how even the right decisions can come with their own kind of grief. It’s about change, self-discovery, and that quiet space where you're still becoming. It’s not a ‘how-to.’ It’s a reflection. A gentle reminder that if you’re feeling a little lost or unsettled right now… you’re not alone. You’re not behind. You’re just not finished yet. The post is live now on the blog— You’ll find it under “Latest Blog Post” in the link in bio, and I’ve popped the direct link into stories too. Save it for a quiet read with a cuppa. I hope it lands softly.

[krumpkin]

A great quote that makes you think 🤔

[audaciousevolution]

Quote of the Day

“Midlife isn’t a crisis. It’s a call. A bold invitation to begin again, with more clarity, courage and care for who you truly are.” - Nadia Renata

Midlife is not the end of something; it’s the start of a deeper, more authentic chapter. It's the season where wisdom meets willingness, where you're finally ready to put you first, not out of selfishness, but out of sacred truth. And this is for both men AND women.

This quote invites us to reframe what we’ve been taught:

🔸 Midlife isn’t something to dread; it’s something to embrace.

🔸 It's where your experiences become fuel for purpose.

🔸 And it's proof that evolution doesn’t expire with age; it deepens.

What is midlife calling you to reclaim? Let us know in the comments.

[onherway]

Pockets

We have settled for less pockets on our dresses than we deserve.

Mother Nature and her tribe need more pockets

because we carry the earth;

it is backbreaking labor to carry the world and her hurts.

Digging graves of comparison and overwork.

Deep down, we struggle to find our worth.

Deviously pitted against each other,

pleasing everyone, putting ourselves last.

The mental load is heavy and repairable, though it is cracked.

Women were made to operate

in phases with experienced teams,

feminine power unleashed in unified communities.

We want to collapse in safety, but

fear has us divided,

we raise our voices so loud we can’t breathe.

a guttural attempt at being taken seriously

because many of us were raised to move and speak softly.

A reset,

a universal earthly maternal leave would give reprieve.

It has pockets, you say with glee.

Nice to meet you; I see you, I hear you,

you are not much different than me.

by janiesgotapen

[bipanicdisco]

Hey, you. If you’re reading this, first of all- thank you. Second of all, I hope you’ll call me Raz, Razzy, Razzlin, Razzle Dazzle, or Razzamatazz and all that Jazz. Yes, it’s a pseudonym. It’ll have to do, I’m afraid. At least for now.

I had originally planned to begin this blog on Substack, but I quickly realized a few things.

1) Lack of privacy: My friends and family members were finding my account despite turning off various friend-finding features. Seeing as I’m not “out” to everyone in my life and I’m not ready to be, this is a problem.

2) I realized my “community” is here. On tumblr. I don’t plan to charge for my writings- it’s not why I write, and it put a lot of pressure on me to make things perfect….

3) But when it comes down to it, what I’m seeking from this blog is to create connections with other like-minded people. People who will read what I have to say and say, “Wow. I have a lot in common with this person. I’d like to get to know them better / be friends / be more.”

Dating sites in 2025 are dreadfully lacking. As a writer, I find them depressing. 500 characters is not enough space for me to tell you who I am as a person. The things that excite me, the things that bring me to my knees. It encourages small talk, when I hate small talk. I would much rather know and understand your philosophy, the way you tick, the reasons you do things the way you do— and in return, feel understood myself.

I’m tired of getting firehosed by people who never actually read my profile, starting conversations with “Hey.” Hey nothing. You fool no one when you open like that. It comes across as a person who is just messaging en masse, and I’m over here seeking real connections.

I’m not saying that Tumblr is a suitable replacement, but I’ve made connections in the unlikeliest of places. Discord servers. Through friends of friends on msn messenger (Yes, I’m aging myself now- I’m 36 at the writing of this post.) And what I guess I *am* saying is this: I don’t want my next relationship to be anything less than amazing, and I know that in order for that to work for me, I need to be friends with the person for a long time before trying to date.

I’m casting a wide net, in search of friends only, and perhaps if I’m lucky, some day I’ll meet someone who doesn’t get filtered out and shows potential beyond friendship. Maybe something happens. Maybe it doesn’t.

In the meantime, I’ll be writing and posting things that are close to my heart. My experiences. And maybe, hopefully, I’ll make some connections with people who can relate. Some best friends. Some interesting people.

So, what makes me worth talking to?

I am a deep thinker. Writing is my hobby. Whether writing blog posts on Tumblr, writing smut, or erotic roleplay with D&D characters. My writing ranges from journal entries to high fantasy to erotic fiction. I’d love to make friends with more writers.

I’m a sensitive, hypervigilant, sweet person who likes to take care of her friends, and is also ungovernable, a flirt, and naughty when feeling my most comfortable around others. It takes a while for me to open up in this way, but it’s a part of my personality my closest friends must be okay with embracing.

I’m a gamer. Video games and D&D, and board games to a lesser degree. I love games that let us tell a story and create something together.

I’m an artist and graphic designer. I’ve illustrated books, designed and photographed products, designed catalogs, emails, social graphics, print work and more. I love watercolor painting and ink, have painted some oil pieces, and often draw digital works of art. I recently began leatherworking and love it.

I love travel. I’d love having a friend to travel with. I am not, but easily could be, a digital nomad. I work from a laptop and don’t need to be in a fixed location. I stayed nearly two months in total over two trips to Brazil. I’d love to travel Europe. I want to see the world. I’d love to have someone to do that with, and to be able to stay long enough in a single location to be able to explore slowly and not rush.

As an extension, I know some Portuguese. I was conversational at the end of last summer, but some things happened that caused me to put aside my tutoring.

I’m a democrat who is highly anxious and has a hard time talking about politics. I’ve had 3 panic attacks since the inauguration, and I need people in my life who believe similarly without insisting on talking about it constantly. It’s very bad for my mental health. I’m probably not as liberal as you want me to be. I don’t like applying stereotypes to any group of people, including problematic ones.

I’m a cis woman who is bi, who has a dating preference towards other bi people, cis or not. It’s just a hard world out there, and it’s really nice to feel understood.

I’m a kinkster, into BDSM. I’m a subby switch and am interested in other switches, preferably dommy switches. I like the *idea* of leather culture but honestly don’t know how to get into it.

I love passionate people. Tell me about what you love.

I want to know about your favorite D&D character. Heck, I would love to roleplay-platonically or erotically-with them if they’re a good match with one of my characters and fit within my range of interests.

I think I’m going to leave it at this for now. I have many a post I’ll be able to write later about myself, life, and everything in it. But I hope, for now, this has been a decent intro.

Love,

Razzy

[sophireslife]

Lost

I can't believe that this is it

That this is the life i have to live

I don't want this even a bit

What i want is to just leave

Time's passing by too fast

I constantly feel like I am stuck

What if all the good times have already passed?

What if the future is just fucked?

It's not that I'm not happy

I am, or at least i think so

It's just that when i'm alone i feel really crappy

and the past few years have been an all-time low

Why is life so serious?

I just want to be young forever

I just wanna stay curious

But life's not like that, so whatever

[mkaneshige]

Mark's Musings #50

Little things done well make the big things happen.