#my avoidance stems from. trauma. like everything really

[david-watts]

god. maybe I do want to kill myself

[chryblossomjjk]

...

[salemlunaa]

🎀 NEW IDEA: ASK CHAT GPT 🎀

ꨄ Use AI to your advantage when it comes to manifesting and shifting…

Although AI can get a little weird and scary sometimes, it’s actually such a great way to get information, motivation and inspiration all in one

Instead of hounding bloggers for the same thing all the time. Go to Chat GPT.

Now, how about i give you a few examples, let’s imagine someone called maya 𖨆

maya is having trouble because she feels like when she tries to induce the void, she always falls asleep and that’s taken away so many years from her dream life

she asks Chat GPT: “I keep falling asleep every time I try to induce the void, I feel so frustrated all the time and I need some help”

Chat GPT answers: “Hi Maya, falling asleep during void practice is common, so don’t be too hard on yourself. One way to combat this is by practicing at a time when you feel awake and alert, like in the morning or after a light exercise session. Another tip is to sit up in a comfortable position rather than lying down, as it can help you stay focused and avoid dozing off. Keep practicing with patience—it’s all part of the process!”

now let’s imagine joey 𖨆

joey is feeling frustrated because he feels like he hasn’t progressed, he’s been in the community for 2+ years and really wants his dream life

he asks: “I’m feeling so frustrated and upset, like I want to give up, I’ve been trying to induce the void and get my dream life for over 2 years, I need motivation”

Chat GPT responds; “Hi Joey, I know it’s tough, but remember that persistence is key—sometimes the journey teaches you just as much as the destination. Instead of focusing on the time passed, celebrate the fact that you’re still trying, which shows incredible resilience. Take a short break if you need to, and reconnect with why you started. Visualize your dream life vividly, and remind yourself it’s worth the effort. Progress might be closer than you think!”

now chloe 𖨆 is feeling really powerless lately, circumstances hit her hard on some days and she feels stuck, she wants to be reminded how the void is so possible and so easy and she’s so capable of it all

she asks: “Can you remind me how powerful I am? Some days circumstances hit so hard and it gets tough!! Can you explain manifesting from a logical point of view to remind me how easy it all is?”

Chat GPT responds: “Hi Chloe, let me remind you of this simple truth: you are the creator of your reality, the God of your world. From a logical point of view, everything you experience stems from your thoughts, beliefs, and focus. Circumstances are just reflections—they only hold power because you give it to them. Shift your focus, and the reflection changes effortlessly. When you truly accept that you’re the one in control, nothing can stand in your way. You’ve always had the power!”

Now you can see how well it works!! You can even use them to give you affirmations, help you with vaunts. You can be as specific as you want, trauma dump as much as you want and say whatever you want without crossing boundaries or being judged. You can use Chat GPT to script, i’ve used it so many times and it has given me so many ideas. And your script will still feel like your own, just see it as your collaborating with Chat GPT and that it you helps put your thoughts into words.

You can even use it when you’re having one of those days and just need to be reminded of the fact that you’re in charge. You can even use it for some tough love or to comfort you as you vent.

Like guys you can do so many things with this, I love Chat GPT so much we’re locked in like this:

LMFAOOO IM JOKING (or am i? 😏)

But in all seriousness, some of you need this. Flooding bloggers asks and dms with questions that they have repeated the answers to multiple times, asking things you damn well know the answer to or just asking for motivation repeatedly can take away from people who actually have a good question to ask and actually need help. Like fogging up a blogger’s inbox repeatedly venting about the 3d, or asking “hOw Do I gEt iNtO tHe VoId?” knowing damn well you know the answer to that, will prevent a blogger from noticing someone who actually has a good question that many people might also have and would actually spark an interesting discussion.

So just ask Chat GPT, it’s okay to have doubts creep in from time to time, it’s okay to need a reminder of basic things, it’s okay to forget how powerful you are sometimes, but you can literally ask Chat GPT to help you with that and it will. Instead of waiting around for bloggers to answer your dm or ask just to say the same thing, you can get actual help, and get it when you want it and how you want it.

Why don’t you ask “explain the law of assumption to me like i’m 5”

“explain the void state to me from a scientific view to help me believe”

“give me some dream body affirmations”

“i’ve been so demotivated, remind me who tf i am again”

“I’m going to come from a filthy rich family when I permashift, can you give me some £10Million+ per year jobs that my desired parents can do”

“I feel so lazy today, bully me into inducing the pure consciousness instead of procrastinating”

you don’t need to harass bloggers for these things when you can have immediate access to the answers you seek.

ꨄ 🧸🎀 Go download Chat GPT and knock yourself out!! 💋

[prapaiwife]

On tiktok there are a lot of babe should cheat yes people still want him to cheat on Charlie... Then there is the whole babe does not deserve Charlie. And finally babe wants his senses back debate.

First off the People who still want babe to cheat on Charlie I truly do not have anything else to say about that. I think it is so self-explanatory how much babe loves Charlie I mean it goes without saying! That honestly If anything I don't know whether Charlie realizes how much babe actually does love him and that's just because of Charlie's own insecurities and his self worth. And you know what babe and Charlie both came from dysfunctional upbringings. And their trauma is speaking big volumes in this season if you pay attention to see. But both are still struggling with the communication and having complete transparency in their relationship. You're not always gonna agree with your partner and you're not gonna see eye to eye.

Then the whole Babe doesn't deserve Charlie discussion. And I think this stems from how some ppl just don't believe babe's commitment to Charlie is enough he doesn't love or appreciate Charlie as much as he says that he does or shows it. But Babe is very aware of the impact that Charlie made on his life and others around them too can see it as clear as day. I mean he even says racing was once his life but since Charlie came into his life that has changed. Along with his priorities that have shifted and his perspectives in his life. Cuz it's not just him anymore for himself and his future. He's thinking about Charlie and their future and wants to live his life with him as long as they both can. I think it's obvious that Nothing matters, absolutely nothing if he doesn't have Charlie I don't even know if babe would really even want to live his life if Charlie wasn't in it. Even when they separate as long as Charlie is still there that's enough even though it doesn't feel the same as them being together relationship wise. At least Charlie is there even when Charlie loses his memories and they will have to start over. As long as he has him that's all he wants.

Which ties he wants his senses back and maybe he's holding a grudge against Charlie. Babe made it very clear when he thought Charlie had died that he did not absolutely care about his senses. I mean Even when Charlie just says that he will die for him to get them back in the first season. Babe didn't even like Charlie mentioning it he didn't dare want him to even speak that into existence because that alone scared him. So now that he doesn't have them in the second season he's not as strong as before and he's not winning races as before. It gets people to assume that's all going to make him feel envious of Charlie taking his ability. When honestly I don't think babe cares anymore about that. Just like how I feel babe doesn't care about this whole skill dissolving drug. Because everything about that is at the cost of Charlie's life. Anything that dangers Charlie's life babe is going to object. And Charlie knows that. And still probably feels a lot of guilt for what he put babe through. But babe wanting his senses back I don't see personally? But that's my take just on the babe dispersed discussions I'm seeing I'm gonna continue to avoid twitter cause it's not any better.

[thejesterstears]

inb4 ep5 potentially switches up the character dynamics but dropping a bit of a theory here that Pomni is the first person in a long time to have made Ragatha feel appreciated and Ragatha very likely clings to that.

Getting into the initial analysis: From what we have seen and know of her character so far, Ragatha strives to be the eternal optimist who tries to make everyone else around her happy, or at least does her best to get along with everyone. We know that she is a people pleaser who is not always upfront about her feelings and avoids saying certain things that are on her mind to maintain the peace. We don’t know yet to what degree that she’s putting up this facade, how many of her actions are genuine versus what she’s forcing herself to do just to please others.

And as a brief aside, to be honest, I can understand her motives to a degree. Like, if I were the one suddenly dropped into this new life with other humans who can’t escape and this handful of individuals are the only people I will ever get to socialize with ever again, I wouldn’t want any of them to dislike me and would certainly do everything in my power to try getting along with them. And I think that’s a lot of why Ragatha behaves the way she does—she doesn’t want to be hated, she wants to be accepted and liked so she puts on this upbeat and agreeable persona. I’m not saying that every one of her kind actions is fake, not by a long shot, but that she is definitely forcing herself to act a certain way at all times so as not to give anyone a reason to dislike her. Remember that people pleasing tendencies often stem from trauma, and whether it was something she already struggled with outside of the circus or something that changed within her once winding up in this new life, I think there’s a good chance that trauma plays a key role in her desire for acceptance and fear of disapproval.

But as much as we’ve observed so far the other circus members all seem fairly indifferent or even put off by her persistent optimism and excessive positivity by now, with Gangle even mentioning how she’s not sure how much of it is genuine. They can see through the cracks in her facade even if they haven’t called her out on it directly.

So when Pomni arrived, Ragatha might have thought “oh yay, a new person to befriend who doesn’t know me yet and will hopefully like me!” Because as soon as Pomni showed up Ragatha immediately started in on trying to connect with her and getting her used to the circus, checking on her first thing on her second day and hyping her up for the adventures and claiming to have already forgiven her for abandoning her on her first day (again, I’ve visited that point many times—and while I think Ragatha was lying about having completely forgiven Pomni at that point, I sincerely don’t think she hates Pomni for it). But Ragatha’s attempts at perking Pomni up were met with an understandably lukewarm response, because Pomni just felt pacified and that wasn’t the type of help she needed in trying to acclimate to her new surroundings. Still, it was enough to make Ragatha worry that Pomni already disliked her after only having just arrived, and that seemed to really upset her. I genuinely think she wanted a friend in Pomni as much as she wanted to be liked by her, otherwise I don’t think she would have expressed that much concern for her when she wasn’t present.

But then in ep3, after Pomni has a heart-to-heart with Kinger and changes her tune a little about her relationships with the others in the circus, she right away approaches Ragatha and sincerely thanks her for her efforts in helping her since her arrival. And it’s Ragatha’s reaction—seeming genuinely surprised like she didn’t expect to ever hear those words from Pomni, but also happy to hear them—honestly made me think “wow, it’s been a while since anyone has told her that, hasn’t it?” Because at this point everyone else in the circus probably takes her for granted a little, not on purpose, but just because they’re accustomed to it. So for Pomni to actually thank Ragatha and make that attempt to reach out after Ragatha had worried she didn’t like her, I think it made Ragatha feel seen for the first time in a long time, that someone actually appreciated what she tries to do for others. And, just maybe, aside from being happy to hopefully be forging an actual friendship with Pomni, it might have made her crave a bit more validation as well.

Which brings me to my last point, which is Ragatha’s seeming jealousy at anything impeding on this budding friendship with Pomni. It’s hard to determine whether this is the case until ep5 actually comes out. But we’ve already seen Ragatha feel frustrated by Pomni “flirting” with Gummigoo in ep4–we might discredit some of what she said because she was too high/drunk to filter herself or think straight but if this was her being brutally honest, I think she does feel hurt that she was the one out of all the circus members to really try befriending Pomni at first only for Pomni to befriend an NPC before Ragatha. And then there’s some speculation that she also might feel jealous of the potential friendship forming between Pomni and Jax in ep5, because it probably stings to see her new friend get along so well with the menace who constantly pushes all of her buttons—again, this is not a “for sure” thing and only based on theory, but it’s very possible. At the end of the day I think it boils down to Ragatha not wanting to lose her new friend who actually made her feel appreciated and validated after so long of feeling like no one especially cares or are wary of her by now. Which, I feel the need to state I do not think Ragatha is acting toxically possessive of Pomni—but I do think she is a very sad and very mentally broken woman trying to cling to any scrap of hope and care she can find in this world, something she might potentially see in Pomni, and she doesn’t want to let that go.

I sincerely hope this word vomit made sense but I just wanted to pour out this thought before the next episode hits us hard. I’m both excited and anxious to see what direction we’re going in as far as Ragatha’s character development is concerned. This is just my two cents on what we’ve seen so far.

[garecc]

i need to ask im thinking about it

how do you think the bots deal with their trauma... i haven't thought about it too much but i need to it's so interesting to ponder

Hm. Well, the simple awnser is that they dont really deal with their trauma. At least not in healthy ways.

Anyway:

Upgrade

Upgrade fascinates me about this bc i have so many thoughts about her. I think she's loud, and she takes her problems out on other people. She doesn't shut down and get quiet - so many times shes expected to just be quiet, she hates it.

I think she has a pretty complex relationship with being a woman. I know the question was about trauma but autonomy and self expression in the robots is a BIG part of their deal to me.

Of the bots she was picked to be "the girl robot" and "the robot who looks like a girl" because she was the tiny repairing robot who made sure the others werent broken completely in the war. My opinion when 2 and 3 were rebuilding the bots for music she was picked as the girl one because she seemed the most "harmless" and "small of them" - rabbit was ofc losing her shit in the corner abt this.

Upgrade accepted it. But shes so sick of being disrespected and seeing as a tacked on side act.

If she's upset or something has triggered her she's loud and angry- snappy, she needs to be heard out. She gets furious and snappy when she feels like she isnt being listened to.

Bad days with her swing wildly between awful to be around to protective- she gets wierd and paranoid about everyone breaking. She was the Repairs robot and even after all this time the fact that isn't her one job anymore freaks her out a bit.

She hates being shut down or told she's being too much. Shes tired of being overlooked. She gets angry. She hates being modified and hates being off. One of her least favorite things is criticism because she just wants to do her own thing. Do exactly what she wants. She's tired of not doing what she wants.

That all is to say, I dont think she deals with her trauma. I think she mostly is dealt with.

That said, she hates explosions and doesnt get how the hell rabbit and the jon like fireworks. And the only time she's quiet and still is if she thinks she needs to avoid being detected. She needs to stay in one piece to fix the others if they break. She cant be broken first.

The Spine

The Spine.... this guy tries so hard to be normal. His primarily motive is being normal. What even is normal. His definition of normal is always out of his reach, always too steps forward from where he is. He keeps trying to get there. Hr never will.

Hes so bad at admitting he needs help. He's always labeled himself as "the strongest one" (Rabbit fucking hates that he does this- it pisses her off and makes her feel like he's underestimating them)

He has it in his head he alone needs to protect his siblings. This leads to him bottling things up and having a crippling aversion to saying no. A lot of this stems from the fact he is primarily composed of titanium. Which is harder to dent and break that copper and brass and iron. He doesnt corrode. He doesnt break. He views himself as the strongest.

Saying "I dont think i can do this alone" or "I need assistance" is difficult for him.

The Spine having a bad time doesnt look like tears or crying. It looks like him being very still and distracted. Taking seconds too long to process input. Agreeing before he even processes what you ask. Its distinctly different from his normal agreeableness because its Very Off for him.

If its particular upsetting then he will excuse himself and stare at a wall alone until he gets over it.

But. But if you catch him and pry you can get him to crack- admit things. Hes.. he's so sad, man. Hes sad.

The spine dealing with his trauma is very... grin and bear it. It's only his problem. And he needs to keep going anyway. He will internalize everything forver. He doesnt want it to be anyone else's problem so instead he just acts like it doesnt exist.

Rabbit

Honestly??? Rabbit's not terrible about coping. She certainly used to be but i think like 85% of her issues were caused by gender dysphoria/depression and now that she's overcome the gender demons she can focus on being so fucking awesome.

She certainly struggles. She has a threshold of not being listened to/not being heard before she snaps. But i dont think the war twisted her up in her head nearly as much as the spine because she actually externalizes things. She will say she feels awful about something and then feels better because she is comforted.

The Spine has his whole thing about being a machine of war. Rabbit doesnt have that. Rabbit doesnt view herself as a machine of anything, she's herself now. Sure she can do war and was built for it, but she was rebuilt for music, and she's been rebuilt again to be herself now.

There's a throughline in rabbits stuff about how she wants to keep her victorian parts- this makes sense to me. She wanted to stay as close to her original design as possible (because getting any further from her original Miss Rabbit plan was--- so awful dysphoria wise) - But I think as she's been retrofitted with her new face and more shaping to be more feminine in appearance she's generally been doing really well. Shes still protective of her parts but shes less--- if you take my eyes ill kill you like she was in the past.

Like don't get me wrong if you tried to modernize her copper into something more sleek shed fucking kill you. She hates modern aesthetics. But that's out of principle and not out of the horror of being less of what she wants to be

She can be what she wants to be now. She can be whatever she wants

In the past shed definitely take her problems out on other people, though. She was irritatable and anguished and empty in a lot of ways. But modern rabbit has emotional spoons for the first time in her life and is using them to be brighter and happier.

She was used for war. But shes mostly over it. She's never going to be again yknow? And even if she is she's good at it so like whatever.

Anyway, if Rabbit is having a bad day she spends it with her family and it goes from bad to tolerable. They make everything better.

The Jon

The Jon.... Honestly I think sometimes he doesnt even know how upset he is until he hits a wall he cant pass. A lot of things are hard for him to keep concrete in his head. He knows things but there's a nebulous quality to recalling and planning. He gets confused a bit easily.

For example, like, he wants to be taken seriously. A lot of people dont treat him seriously or underexplain things because they assume he won't understand. This frustrates him it builds and builds until he snaps at someone, and he HATES snapping. He hates being mean and rude. But he doesn't realize hes nearing that point until hes stepped over that edge

He mostly tries to ignore his problems I think. Pretend they dont exist and will just go away, although I think hes actually pretty open if hes upset, he'll talk and talk and work himself up to like, hysterics. I like to think he curls up in the other robots arms and gets all of the stress out until he feels better.

It's been a long time since veitnam. Hes safe now and hes starting to actually feel that way. Sometimes he doesnt but hes okay. Or he will be if he gets help.

And here's the point in the post where I have to admit I haven't written or roleplayed Hatchworth or Zer0 get so I dont know them yet. and you've got the brand new face has taught me all about rabbit and spine but I haven't really touched Zero or Hatchys characters yet!

Hatchworth

Hatchy I have some ideas-- i think hes entirely too agreeable and fearful to upset anyone again. Hes scared of breaking again or somehow getting put back in the fault. I think hes also consistently frustrated that the world has changed and he hasnt.

He went from like, early 20th century to now, practically. Things have changed and hes in a perpetual game of catch-up.

He might put off repairs because he doesnt want to hear bad news and be put back in the vault? But then he'd get in his head about what if things get worse because he doesnt go?

Hes very agreeable and people pleasing i think, but i haven't thought much about it.

Zero

God. I dont know. I need to watch more Zero videos to get a grasp on his character. I have an idea vaguely in my head that because he is an assembled prototype of a lot of other robots his sense of unity with his pieces is like of iffy- but i don't know honestly? Zero doesnt like being alone i dont think, but he was in the archives for most of his existence and the Weekend was war so long ago. Hes an enigma to me still. Ill get back to you on him i think!!

[comradeboyhalo]

It's crazy how literally everything about why Bad is fucked up can be linked to Atlantis. I don't even think the Federation is half of his trauma.

He lies compulsively about everything, but his whole identity is built on a lie. He's just made of lies. Yes, he lies because he's mischievous, but I don't think he can stop lying. He is so fearful of his past catching up to him, that, for 11,600 years, he's been lying about not being a demon. Telling someone what species you are is just introductory level knowledge. And Bad cannot even reveal that much to others. When we're starting with this much repression, is it really a surprise that he can't ever be truthful? And this, of course, all began because he's terrified that people will find out he destroyed a city.

He has a "family first" mindset that isn't exactly original, but it is unusually intense. He is very much the type to burn the world for his loved ones, and he's very willing to act on it. Every parent had heavily grieved the loss of their kids, and many of them unleash this grief in destructively. No parent has swung so far dark that they actively tortured another being. This is NOT to say Bad loves his children "more", this is only to prove that Bad's extreme is just so far removed from everyone else's. This can all stem from the fact that Bad's relationship with loss has, in my opinion, permanently fucked up the way he forms attachment.

So, everyone in Atlantis dies. Great. Bad tries to live. He forms friendship with more mortals. They die. He forms new friendships. They die again. This repeats for thousands of years. The only exception to this rule is Skeppy, and his relationship with Skeppy borders on co-dependency. His "obsession" with Skeppy feels so foreign to other islanders, and it should be from a mortal standpoint. But Bad has to be careful about who he lets in to avoid loss, so if he can love one person freely, then of course he will love them with everything. The same can be said for Dapper and Pomme. They're his children, and he loves them without any of the paranoia he subjects to anyone else. And then every single attachment gets taken away from him. He doesn't have an anchor anymore. It's not surprising he's forming an unhealthy dependency on Ron, and he's not going to give a fuck about anyone's feelings or morals if it means getting his family back.

The same can be said for his paranoia. He's overly paranoid because he was forcibly summoned to a place where everyone around him died. This is canon, confirmed by cc!Bad himself. He's been like this BEFORE getting dumped on murder mystery island! And if his paranoia is worsening because of the island, then of course his "worse" is going to feel drastically more intense than others'. Everything here is just validating pre-existing habits.

All of this is a cocktail for emotional disaster. Bad has been hard at work repressing everything for 11,000 years, and is losing everyone he uses to keep himself sane. I'm not even sure how he can heal from the loss of Dapper and Pomme, even if temporary, because he hasn't even begun to heal from Atlantis. It makes his friends' desperation to save him that much sadder. They're out of their depth with this one, the first step has to be made by Bad himself, and nothing he has done has convinced me that step will happen.

[mangotangerine]

Mangotangerine's Really Cool Guide to Fic Summaries

I finally got my shit together and made something coherent.

What is the purpose of a summary?

The purpose of a summary is to tell readers what they can expect out of your story. Similar to the blurb on the back of a book, this should be short and succinct. It should give the reader an idea of the themes, the characters, the primary conflict, and your writing style.

Regarding giving the reader an idea of your writing style - don't write the summary in an entirely different register than what the fic is. If your fic is a silly goofy chatfic but your summary reads as very serious gritty detective noir, you're setting an expectation you're not delivering on.

And vice versa! If you're writing a gritty detective noir and it's not silly goofy at all, make sure your summary matches the tone of your fic.

What to put in a summary

While the focus of your summary might shift depending on the story, the underlying structure is the same:

1) Who is the story about? 2) What is the context? 3) What is the inciting incident? 4) The Ultimate Question

Who is the story about? Who is your POV character, and who else plays a major role? Is there a romantic partner, rival, or friend? What’s their dynamic? Are they childhood friends with unresolved tension? Enemies forced to work together? Give the reader an idea of how these characters relate to each other and what kind of tension there might be.

What is the context? What’s your character’s situation at the beginning of the story? Are they running a bookshop? Avoiding responsibility? Recovering from trauma? What do they want, what motivates them, and what are they afraid of?

What is the inciting incident? What knocks over the first domino in their story that everything stems from? It doesn't have to be dramatic, maybe they stepped on a banana peel and broke their big toe or something, but it's whatever gets your character to move from the context they're in at the start, to the context they're in at the end.

The Ultimate Question: What is your story really exploring? What question sits at the heart of it? Will they fall in love? Can they survive the system? Will they ever forgive themselves? This gives the reader a reason to care about the journey. Not just what happens, but why it matters.

Example 1: Ship-fic

Character A runs a bookshop with his cat on a lovely street with tons of history, Character B opens up a tattoo shop just across the street. Character B is loud, brash, and causes chaos in Character A's normally peaceful little street. When Character A's cat gets out, he's frantic, and finds help where he least expects it. Unfortunately, the cat gets attached to his tatted up savior. Can Character A and Character B survive co-parenting a cat together, or will their bitter feud result in a cat custody battle and the end to both their businesses?

Example 2: Gen fic

Character A has lived his entire life never being the main character. Sidekick, apprentice, assistant manager—anything but the protagonist. He's content with that, until an estranged uncle dies and Character A inherits the cranky, old cat nobody knew he had. The longer he spends with the cat, the more he notices it's not like any other cat he's met. It's intelligent, it knows too much, and one day he wakes up to a note spelled out in inky kitty footprints—a carefully created message that reads, "Help. I've been turned into a cat." It's up to Character A to investigate the mystery of who the cat is and how to turn them back into a human.

The TLDR Summary Trope

In fanfiction, you will frequently find summaries that add what is essentially a tl;dr at the end, with a single sentence summing up the main themes.

For our first example, this could look like

(Summary Here) OR A story about how co-parenting a cat can bring two polar opposites together.

For our second example, this could look like

(Summary Here) OR A story about how Character A's uncle got turned into a cat and now Character A has to figure out how to bring him back.

It's an easy way to reinforce what the story is about at its core, but it isn't necessary at all.

[askuemki]

To Be an "Experienced" WCUE Player..

(Or, how to be a decent role-player)

I've encountered and been in some situations recently that inspires me to write this. I know this might not reach the general audience of WCUE players with the platform I'm writing on -- but I hope people can read this and understand where my concerns stem from. I may edit this later if I feel if my words fail to comprehend my thoughts. You are free to correct me in the comments or give your own ideas. This is far from perfect.

If you haven't heard or seen me before, Hi. I've been playing this silly cat game for a good while now (beta days to give a general measure). This stems from my own experience and encounters with other players from the game. I might as well call this a "guide" as well as an advisory for other players.

Introduction

I think people have their own ideals of what an "experienced" (or "exp") player is. But I think players in general aspire to be like older WCUE members. They have cool morphs, names, and bio formatting. They roleplay in such a way which may aspire to other players, me included. But experience is more than just how things look, but it's the way you conduct yourself both while roleplaying and your demeanor outside of roleplay.

You, Outside of the Character

How you act will affect other people, whether you know it or not. Because of our anonymity online, we are more prone to forgetting to take responsibility for our actions, to lie and pretend that we're "better" than other people. If this isn't a wakeup call for you, then something will be when you get older.

At the end of the day, YOU ARE PLAYING A CHILD'S GAME ON ROBLOX.

What does this mean, exactly? - WCUE is a game for people to use for an escape, to play as characters or socialize. You are interacting with children, whether you would like to or not. WHAT YOU DO may affect these kids in the future. I've seen kids exposed to inappropriate topics on this game, too young to really comprehend what it means. I've seen older players be rude to younger kids, destroying their confidence and willingness to roleplay. As an "experienced" player, it is YOUR responsibility to be kind to these younger players. You don't have to be a doormat and let them step all over you, but don't be mean just because they're younger or "cringier". Guide them from what is wrong versus right. - Everyone may move on from this game at some point. All the popularity you have farmed, game passes you bought, roleplays you've hosted/participated in -- will all be meaningless in the long run. To flex on young children to make yourself feel better is pathetic. An "experienced" player knows how to make roleplay work- not to maintain a popularity contest. You are not better just because your morphs are fancier. You are not better just because you associate with cool people. At the end of the day everyone is here to enjoy a game.

What should I keep in mind? - No matter who you interact with, they are a person behind the screen. People have their own lives and emotions, as well as their own world views. This goes for interacting with hosts, especially. Just today I was continuously crowded by people, and it's extremely difficult to enjoy a game when you're interrupted. - It's okay not to agree with what people do, but you can respect their opinions without being an asshole about it. - YOU ARE NOT REQUIRED TO STAY IN A SITUATION YOU'RE UNCOMFORTABLE WITH. I've seen this all the time where players retort back in various arguments and situations. If you can't play well with these people, spare yourself the emotional exhaustion and server hop. - THERE IS A PLACE FOR EVERYTHING. Keep certain topics OUT OF THE GAME. Discussing politics, suggestive jokes, sensitive topics such as your trauma may be triggering to certain people. In general, it is against TOS to talk about certain things. While I get some things can't be completely avoided, TALK IN PMS or keep things vague. KIDS do not need to know about certain things until they're older. I've seen a situation where a group of people talked about "character's they goon for," and a moderator was called because of it. Keep things appropriate if you don't want to be banned. Or alternatively don't be the one guilty for exposing a kid to horrible things or people. - WHO YOU ASSOCIATE WITH WILL AFFECT YOU. Personally, I've picked up small habits from friends over the years/months I've been with them. It will happen to you to. A baby doesn't just say "lol", it learns from older kids to say that phrase. If you find that you don't feel comfortable with certain people, then find another group. I understand it may be hard, but it takes some time to find that right group of friends you'll stick with. I know people can get triggered no matter what you say, nor can you please everyone -- but be reasonable enough. Don't be an asshole. Don't be that villain who affects a child's mental wellbeing just because you find them annoying.

While Roleplaying

Yes, you may play as a villain, as a mean character -- but you're still your own person outside of that character. A list of the following to consider: (I don't have much else to say here, apologies.) - COORDINATE with your clan members before asking a host/major roles. They are busy. They will be busy. Coordinate means to talk with other players to figure things out. Your host cannot do EVERYTHING for you. - IF what you want is that important or is needed for a major role to be involved READ THE ROOM. Shift + P is your best friend. Try to find a good space to ask later if they're being crowded. Or request to speak with them later. If you struggle to read the room, then be clear about what you want. - NO IS NO. Don't pout, don't whine. Nobody is the main character in other people's roleplays. If you want something that the roleplay isn't giving you, I'd advise to find another one that may give what you want. OR start your own! - BE FAIR WITH OTHERS. While you would want your oc to be the greatest, strongest cat of all times -- other people would want the same. It may be disappointing not to have the spotlight, but try to give people a chance, they may surprise you. - If you find yourself saying "I'm bored!" Then find something to do, or someone to interact with. It is YOU that has to take the initiative to entertain yourself. People won't bow down for you. - Patience is an absolute need. Why? People type slow, people may be overwhelmed, people have their own wants for your shared roleplay. Complaining will do nothing but deter people away from interacting. I understand you may have a certain limit, and best to let people know about that.

Advice for Actual Roleplay

The following is actual advice for actual roleplay! No other words from me. **The following below may not work for everyone, just what I've learned in my years.** - Write like you're writing a book. Utilize those metaphors, similes, so on! Describe your surroundings or mention others in your words. Be more than just what your character does. Explore what they think. Or alternatively: You can think like you're acting on stage, get into the character enough to feel things out -- but do keep in mind how you act outside of that. - Be adaptable to your roleplay. I promise you; nothing will go the way you want if you strategically plan everything out. WCUE roleplays are messy at best, and that's okay. You may be surprised of what's to come! - Improv is great, actually! To be able to think on the go is awesome and may bring unexpected (but welcomed?) results. Herbalists especially, people can only wait for you for so long to bring up the right treatment for rabies. - Prioritize something in your roleplay. Do you want to have fun? Do you want plot? Do you want to support a functional clan? You may have to give up certain things to achieve this. (EX: Functional clans may be boring, or having fun may not result in a functional clan.) - MAKE THAT FIRST MOVE IN CHARACTER! I've seen so many people sit around and do nothing. They may be nervous (I can relate), or they're unsure of what to do. If you want drama, then encourage that drama.

I don't like to linger on drafts that often, so this will most likely be posted right after. Again, my words are far from perfect. If there's a better way I can phrase things I am open to improve. TLDR; DON'T EXPOSE CHILDREN TO CERTAIN TOPICS, DONT BE AN ASSHOLE ON A KID'S GAME, WCUE ISNT YOUR THERAPIST (THEY'RE KIDS). TO BE "EXPERIENCED" IS TO BE A GUIDE + EXAMPLE FOR OTHERS.

Thank you for reading. I hope this will reach someone. -Cecilia 2025

[americasass81]

Good Lovers Lie

Warnings 18+ for the following:- Mention of Past Trauma, Implied PTSD, Implied M/M Smut, Implied Choking, Male Masturbation, M/M Oral, mild Angst, Mild Fluff.  Seriously do not read if any of this upsets you, the warnings are there for a reason. Feedback is welcomed and any mistakes are my own.

By proceeding you are acknowledging that you are over 18 and are consenting to the content below the cut.

Synopsis:- Finding Loki's scepter seemed like an unconventional way to bring Steve Rogers and Tony Stark together but now the consequences stemming from it may very well be the thing that tears them apart.

Author’s Note 1:- Written solely for my love of these two flawed individuals as well as the wonderful movie that is Avengers: Age of Ultron, I also incorporated a nod to the fabulous @caplanbuckybarnes who gifted us with the amazing Titles For Caplan Writing Challenge.  I think this title choice fits so well here.  Thank you.

Author’s Note 2:- As always, all images have been found through google search.

Pairings:- Steve Rogers x Tony Stark

Total Word Count:- 4,351

Standing in the barn after his talk with Fury and the wounds it had opened up, Tony tried now to remember the last time he had felt so untethered, but the memory wouldn't come.  How could it?  Closing his eyes and trying to focus, his mind instead kept him firmly rooted on what had occurred outside with Steve and what Clint had just told them ... some of them would have to share a room.

Of course, that didn't really surprise him given what little he had discovered about this place and its occupants since their arrival.  But why then did he have to get him as a bunk mate?  Why did fate, or more specifically Mrs. Barton, have to hone in on what the smarter ones of them had already suspected and suggest his ideal sleeping buddy Banner share a room with the ravishing Auntie Nat.  And what the hell was that even about?  Auntie?  Had she known about Clint's situation all along and simply not said anything?  What else did she know that even now she kept completely to herself and what did this mean for the team's ability to fully trust her going forward?

Not that that question really bothered him as much as it should have right about now though given what Strucker's enhanced experiment had shown him, what camping out here meant and all the resulting issues that now played on his mind.  For Laura's matchmaking between his teammates, well intentioned as it was, had landed him in a situation he had slowly been avoiding since New York and his verbal sparring match with Steve aboard Fury's helicarrier.  A situation that their new verbal spat by the wood piles had simply enhanced further.

After all, he had grown up in the shadow of the great Steve Rogers, his own father having revered him so much that Tony often wondered if any man could ever live up to the legend.  But the more he'd gotten to know him, while setting aside all that history and everything his dear old dad had made of the man, the more his own opinion of him began to change.  Though not necessarily in a good way.

Despite the man's self righteousness and clear cut stance on right and wrong, there still seemed to be a genuinely decent man at his core who valued loyalty and friendship above all else.  And his other assets weren't so bad either.  After all, though he would never admit it to anyone, images of Steve using his tongue in sexually creative ways, rather than telling him off, seemed to be the only thing at present that kept the nightmares of New York at bay and now it seemed the log chopping session would also feature in that therapy too.  But why?

Why had so much of what had been done and said out by the log piles stuck with him and affected him on such a primal level?  After all, he had seen Cap fight before, so swinging that axe and watching it cleave the timber in half really shouldn't have been all that amazing.  But damn, when his bare hands had ripped that log apart, Tony couldn't stop the feeling going straight to his neither regions or the new images that sprang to mind now and joined the old ones already visiting him in his dreams.  And what graphic images they proved to be.

What would it feel like he wondered to have those same hands manipulate his body into any number of positions that suited their needs?  Would Steve's aforementioned dark side be agreeable to choking Tony to near unconsciousness with those same hands or biceps to increase the high that would inevitably come from their coupling?  Hell, was the super soldier even capable of holding Tony upright off the ground on nothing but those impressively strong thighs while his cock ripped him apart and helped him forget everything except the blond's name.  Tuning out the world around him now as all these questions and images blended together and sparked the fire within his loins to life while his hand firmly stroking his cock tried to work the tension out of his system, the barn door opening failed to distract him from what he was doing ... but that voice however did.

"Hey Tony, Laura asked me to tell you that ...," Steve had started, but now all the super soldier could do was not tear his eyes away from the startled superhero before him or the feelings assaulting every nerve ending in a body the log splitting session had primed for action.

"What the fuck, Rogers?" Tony now barked out as his hand left his member while his panicked fingers worked frantically to tidy up the jeans and boxers wedged haphazardly around his thighs.  Not that he got very far with that task however.

Closing the door behind him now and moving cautiously towards the Iron Avenger so as not to spook him further, Steve dropping to his knees now and looking up at Tony while uttering the words "May I?" may very well have knocked the dark haired man off his feet if a nod from his head hadn't given the blond all the permission he seemed to need however.  It seemed Steve's dark side was coming out to play after all and Tony was going to be the one to witness it.

Placing his hands securely on Tony's hips now and as such ensuring he indeed remained upright, Steve next took advantage of his teammate’s previous actions, opened his mouth and slipped it forwards onto Tony's semi-hard erection.  And got exactly the kind of reaction he was hoping for.  Holding as much of him as he could in his throat while his lips held the rest of the muscle in place, Steve's tongue now lapping at the underside of Tony's cock while he breathed in and out through his nose might have felt like the realization of all his fantasies since he had first woken up in this time and met the man above up, but it paled in comparison to the reality his actions actually brought forth.

For that was better than his dreams.  Far better indeed.

Panting and moaning above him now as Steve's name slipped past his lips every second or third breath, Tony's hands now moving down to grab hold of the blond's head indicated that he couldn't handle much more.  The teasing had to stop.  Pulling that head completely off his member now and allowing Steve to breathe properly for a moment, there were so many questions Tony wanted to ask him, but it seemed his higher brain functions had temporarily short circuited leaving only the reality of his fantasies coming true.  Gazing down at the image before him instead now as Steve's tongue shot out and made contact with the head of his cock once more, the sensation gnawing at his loins took priority and guided his actions once more.  It needed taking care of and Steve it seemed was only too willing to offer his assistance so he gave in.

Slotting his erection back into the other man's mouth again as Steve once more opened himself up to swallow as much of Tony as he possibly could, the billionaire now began a steady rhythm of short thrusts into the man below him until it seemed Steve too couldn't take anymore either.  Fighting against the hold on his head now as Tony seemed cautious of hurting the super soldier kneeling before him, Steve took control once more however and threatened to bring the younger man to his knees again.  Placing his hands over Steve's on his own hips now as the man out of time set up his own furious pace, Tony couldn't remember the last time he had ever been sucked off so deliciously hard, but he hoped it wouldn't be the last.  Now he just had to survive it.

So egging Steve on now, though breathing became harder while his lower body began to tremble, the pressure building in his balls finally told his brain he'd had enough.  He was only human after all and the last thing the world needed to wake up to tomorrow morning was the news that Tony Stark was dead from the best blowjob ever received in human memory.  Never mind how such a thing would look to the other occupants of the farm.  Holding on to this thought now and finding reserves of strength he never thought possible, Tony took hold of Steve's head once more, let loose every profanity known to man and simply prayed no one in the vicinity had heard a word he uttered as his knees shook and his balls sent rope after rope after rope of warm cum shooting down the waiting super soldier's well used throat while both men held on for dear life.

Detaching from said super soldier then as both of them collapsed to the ground under the weight of what they had just done, their labored breathing seemed to be the only sound for miles around now as each of them tried to compose themselves enough to figure out where they went from here.  Of course they weren't really thinking in terms of friendship or relationship or anything even remotely related to the activity they had just partaken in, no their primary concern at this moment in time was more of the functional variety.

Steve after all had left the log splitting and entered the barn simply to tell Tony that Laura was in the process of making dinner if the Avengers wished to satisfy their hunger.  At least, that had been the plan before their unscheduled interruption.  The way things stood now meant that if they didn't get their asses moving, someone might come looking for them and this was not a scene they wished to explain to themselves let alone anyone else right now.  But then again, their asses didn't seem all that willing to move.

Continuing to try to come down from the high of his release as the ghostly feeling of Steve's throat still kissed his softening cock, it was Tony who somehow managed to grab onto a semblance of functionality first however to reach out his hand and grab Steve's attention as the words he now spoke slowly broke through the sex-hazed bubble hovering all around them.  "Laura ... wanted ... something?" he wheezed out and it seemed this was just the spark the super soldier serum running throughout Steve's veins needed to finally push the two men into action.

"Damn it, yes.  Dinner," Steve blurted out quickly now as he lifted himself up off the barn floor before reaching down to do the same for Tony.  Watching a moment longer then to make sure now that the other man wasn't about to end up back on the ground from the sexual act he had just endured, a quick smirk from Tony with a nod of his head once more as he put himself back together was all the sign Steve needed apparently to tell him things were perfectly fine.  Well at least as fine as they could be given the circumstances.

Catching Tony off guard once more then with a swift peck on his lips and a stern reminder of dinner, Steve next left the barn and hurried back to the house in the hopes of at least heading off any questions that might be leveled against the two men for any possible tardiness on their part.  As it turned out, their tryst hadn't actually gone on as long as they had thought as Fury now entered the kitchen from elsewhere at the same time that Tony walked through the back door and Steve through the front.  It seemed fate had smiled on them this time at least.  Too bad it couldn't last however.

Eating dinner, discussing what was known and unknown with Fury and then coming up with the bones of a plan to handle Ultron and his lackeys, night now called out to them and with it the sleeping arrangements that had earlier seemed problematic enough before the barn incident had complicated everything further.  Now it seemed the longest night of their lives was only just beginning.

Heading up the stairs now and stopping momentarily to watch Natasha close the door to the room she would share with Bruce, Tony thought of heading back downstairs and camping out in the barn instead, but that solution was just as awkward as moving forward ... for many, many reasons.  First off, what would be his explanation when dawn's light woke them all up and questions were asked as to why he had chosen to bed down out there instead of in the house.  Then of course there was the memory of what had happened out there earlier to contend with.  How was he supposed to sleep in the very location where Steve Rogers, the same man who earlier that day had admonished him on the battlefield for slipping out a swear word, had all but sucked the life out of him through his dick.  No way he was getting a decent night's kip there.  So that just left moving forward and sharing a room with the very same man.  Now that would be the definition of awkward.

Casting these thoughts aside though and opening the door now on whatever lay ahead, what greeted him inside however was not what he expected and shook the foundations of his world in a way that what happened earlier had not ... for with nothing else to do but watch him, Steve looked absolutely stunning.  Leaning angle ways against the window as the moon's glow cast him in beautiful shadows, Tony didn't need him to say anything to know the blond was lost in some memory.  Perhaps a powerful one too given that he didn't even move when Tony closed the door and walked farther into the room.  He did finally acknowledge his presence however when Tony came to mirror his stance on the opposite side of the window and the words he spoke threw the Iron Avenger for yet another loop.

"She showed me the past," he started, turning his gaze to meet Tony's now and this time the brunet thought his friend looked haunted.  But if that was a result of the moonlight or the memory that held his current focus, he couldn't be sure.  But he wanted to know more.  So nodding his head in encouragement now as Steve struggled with what he had seen, he eventually figured things out it seemed and spoke again.  "Peggy Carter.  She told me the war was over.  That we could go home," Steve now confirmed but Tony was surprised when the blond didn't stop there.  Admitting to his teammate that the vision was a lie, that there were things and people here that he refused to walk away from, he further confessed that he couldn't even reconcile returning to the past and sitting on the sidelines to watch the world struggle on when he could do so much to help.  When he had all but signed up for it.

That to him he further explained would be tantamount to playing a part in any atrocities that took place should it even be possible to send him back there in the first place.  And that was something he just couldn't live with.  No for better or worse this was his time now and he had finally made peace with that while finding some bright spots to rebuild his life around.  Possibilities he never had before, that he was now willing to explore with the right person.  And it was this statement above all others he had uttered so far that now seemed to trigger something in Tony as he joined in the confessions as well and blurted out his own vision as he had done with Fury earlier that day.

Listening intently to every word and shocked now that Tony had carried this secret around with him since before their encounter with Ultron, it triggered, at least for now, a bit more forgiveness regarding his friend's messing around with the scepter in the first place, while also making Steve want so badly to remind his friend that this was probably nothing more than residual trauma from what he had gone through in New York.  After all, Tony's heart had stopped momentarily as a result of his heroics with the missile and the wormhole that day and Steve would be lying if he didn't admit there were still nights that he woke up with the image of Tony's lifeless body lying in the street.

But that was a path he didn't need to walk right now.  Instead he simply needed to be there for his teammate, so moving to stand before the other man now, his heart skipped a beat and he hoped he was doing the right thing as he then closed the distance between them and placed his forehead against Tony's before pulling their bodies flush against each other.  Waiting a heartbeat more then to see what reaction he might receive, the other man placing his arms around his back was all the sign Steve apparently needed to carry on however.  So that's exactly what he did.

"That vision was a lie also Tony.  We're both standing here, our hearts are both still beating and as long as we stand together we cannot be defeated," Steve explained and as they continued to stay as they were and hold each other tight, it was as if their presence grounded the other and moved them away from all that had gone before to anchor them now in where they were.  But that still brought its own problems.

Remembering momentarily now the dark side Steve had intimated at during their log splitting session, what he had done afterwards in the barn and the time period he had grown up in, Tony could easily see now how conflicted the blond might be regarding what was possibly happening between them and what had already happened, but the truth was Tony was intrigued.  And when Tony Stark was intrigued, interesting stuff usually followed.

So leading on from this idea now while hoping it ended up exactly where he wanted, Tony now pulled back from Steve and winked at him cheekily before dropping to his knees as the super soldier had done with him earlier.  Undoing his belt and jeans then before helping the other man out of the clothing, Tony got to fully focus now on what lay before him and he had to admit it almost rendered him speechless.  But not for the reason he would have thought a moment ago.  Prim and proper to the point of watching his own language as well as that of his fellow Avengers, here stood the pinnacle of human perfection in all his science enhanced glory and it seemed the man was ready to go at a moment's notice.  Quite literally.  Going commando now that the jeans had been removed, his member wasn't fully erect but as Tony reached out his fingers to connect with the muscle ... it wasn't far off.  He simply needed to nudge it along.

Gliding his hand along the rod now as he warned the blond above him not to make a sound, he so wanted to repay the favor Steve had visited upon him earlier ... but Tony Stark was no fool.  Impressive as the other man's cock was beneath his fingers, Tony knew, at full mast, now was neither the time nor the place to fully experience or enjoy such a weapon.  But he still wanted to see it all the same.  So pumping the other man firmly then while his other hand came up to caress the sac twitching beneath, Tony glancing up to catch Steve biting his lip in a so far successful attempt to silence his pleading, replaced his own momentary sense of jealousy at seeing how well the blond was hung with a new found sense of pride instead that he could pull this reaction from him.  Which in turn spurred him on to do more.

Continuing the movement of his hands, he now placed his mouth around the cock before him and cursed silently to himself at the strain he felt throughout his jaw as his mouth moved forwards and enveloped as much of Steve as he could without choking.  For the man was the thickest he'd ever experienced and he wasn't even fully erect yet.  Casting this observation aside quickly however as it only distracted him with his earlier thoughts of this substantial phallus ripping his ass apart once more, Tony now concentrated on using his mouth and hands to jerk the other man off and it seemed his skills were more than up to the task.

Hollowing out his cheeks and taking as much meat as he was comfortable with, his hands continuing to squeeze Steve's remaining shaft and balls soon had the desired effect as the super soldier grabbed hold of the billionaire's head, held him in place and emptied an all merciful load of warm liquid down his waiting throat.  A load that actually made Tony thankful he wasn't able to yet take more of Steve's length given that he also still liked breathing as well.

Removing his top then before collapsing on the floor as Tony swallowed down every last drop of cum his friend had released, Steve meanwhile tried to control his own breathing along with the urge to do more.  But he knew that would have to wait.  For one, looking at Tony stripping off now before joining him on the floor, claiming this man fully deserved to be done in a setting where both of them could totally let loose and hear the effect their actions had on the other.  On top of that, tomorrow the world needed saving and Clint's property had already been generous enough to provide them sanctuary without defiling it further like two uncontrollable teenagers.

No, moving whatever this was onto the next phase could definitely wait, but talking about things was still a reasonable activity and as they now lay side by side and began to drift back down from the high both of them had just experienced, if the liquid leaking from Tony's cock was any indication, it was Steve who broached this subject now as he seemed to be the first of them to get his voice back this time.  "So Tony, was this a one time thing forged in the heat of whatever this mess is, or will we follow where it leads regardless of what tomorrow may bring?" Steve whispered and as the brunet finally relaxed and looked at the man he had now had a sexual encounter with twice in one day, he knew what they both needed to hear despite his reservations.

"We ride this to the end Steve, you and me together," he whispered back before reaching up on his elbow, moving forward and placing his lips gently against those of the waiting super soldier.  Kissing him deeper then the longer their lips remained joined, air called out to both of them again and as they parted once more Tony decided to further cement their new relationship with what he spoke now.  "I love you Steve.  I know this is all new, I know we haven't really always seen things the same way and honestly," he laughed slightly now before continuing, "I don't even know how you feel about me.  But I do love you and if you feel the same way then I promise you nothing or no one will ever rip us apart."

Staring at Tony now as a thousand thoughts clashed with a thousand more emotions within him, Steve fought the fiercest internal battle he could ever remember having to focus all that turmoil into a single cohesive structure and then blurted it out before all rational thought took over and the man who longed for a life like everyone else was replaced once more with the soldier who put duty and sacrifice above all else.  "I love you too Tony.  I don't like all the things you do and honestly, sometimes your ego does get in the way of your good intentions and screams at me to take you to task for such foolishness.  But god help me if I don't see your heart and want to lay claim to it."

And that confession it seemed was enough to do the Iron Avenger in and reveal the same heart that Steve not only cherished now but had forced Tony three years previously to face his own mortality and set him on the path he currently trod.  Wiping away an unexpected tear then as a result of their exchange before moving forward and kissing his now lover again, Tony then spoke of his promise of forever once more before turning over onto his side and slotting himself back against the bigger man and the comfort he offered.

Spooning with Steve on the bedroom floor then between the window and the bed, while the blond threw a blanket over both of them and peppered his shoulder with the softest of kisses he could ever remember touching his skin, Tony knew in his gut however that the words he had spoken had been the real lie.  But right now he didn't really care.  Though he didn't know for sure what lay ahead, the events in New York and the vision he'd had all spoke to him of a tragedy that would change their world forever.  What that meant for Steve and himself specifically and the love they had now found, well in this moment they needed the lie far more than they needed to know what their futures might hold, so closing his eyes and sinking back into his lover's embrace, he let go of the worry just this once in favor of experiencing how much joy the lie brought them for however long it was fated to last.

[grabby-smitten]

Exes poll answer

Caleb would be my ex because he actually reminds me wayyyy to much of my RL ex. His controlling nature combined with the talking down to and treating me like I'm still a child, I just can't do it. As someone with PTSD because of said ex, its too much. While Caleb thinks he means well, it'd push me so far away from him I'd be about 10 seconds away from getting a restraining order. Me leaving him I don't see him taking it well despite the outward control he shows. I can see him trying to manipulate others and those around me to try and find me after, as I'd keep my cards close to my chest. This way he has minimal information to go on and I can try and control which info he gets. And if/when he finds out I'm with Sylus, I really don't think he'd take it well given that Sylus is the leader of Onychinus and everything that comes with that.

Current LI being Sylus, I have no doubt he'd ensure the N109 zone is and continues to be a reinforced fortress where I can feel safe despite what can and does go on there. He's already protective, and I can see him being even more so after I show up on his doorstep after being in Skyhaven shaken and upset. He'd definitely do whatever he can to keep tabs on Caleb and ensure that something like that never happens again and I never feel powerless again. As for TLC from him, words of comfort, affirmation of what I'm feeling is valid, etc would be common as well as words of encouragement to prove Caleb wrong and rub it in his face.

This isn't to say I hate Caleb. I don't by any means. I find him as a villian type fascinating as I know a lot of it stems from trauma and whatnot which I can empathize with. He just hits a bit too close to home for me right now. I'm hoping as the story progresses this'll change enough so I can enjoy him more.

Oh? I understand and loved to read the reasoning behind your decision. A reminder is a reminder, we are unable to avoid that. I get it.

As you describe this whole situation, I see Sylus as the right choice in these circumstances too. He has the means to keep you safe and that’s comforting. A whole “city” to keep you out of harm’s way? There’s no better place to be. You’d be untouchable.

Exes poll

[beevean]

While I know Andrew is not perfect, a lot of people are swinging the other pendulum and acting like he's just as evil as Ashley if not more and the real abusive one of the situation or outright downplaying any nice trait he has (or any justified reason for why he acts the way he does)

Like, even if avoiding the consequences of his actions is a primary motivator, he really did feel bad about Killing her as well as Ashley's nonchalant reaction to it and the fact she used Nina's death to blackmail him, most of the venomous words for her are because said death and what she forced him into (which likely carries to how he treats her in high modern day)

Also the fact he knows what guilt w

I've been marinating in TCOAAL analyses, and the takes on both characters are fascinating.

My take is that Ashley is immoral, while Andrew is amoral. There is a difference between the two. The conflict comes from the fact that Andrew is aware of this, he's aware that it's "wrong", and tries very hard to be Ashley's moral compass to compensate. Ashley, ever since she was a kid, was made painfully aware that there was something "wrong" with her, no one except her brother loved her (and even then, who said that he wasn't pretending?), and her reaction was to embrace it.

(I'd really love to talk about their childhood, how Leyley displays behavior that she could have only learned from others, how they seem to have learned the lesson that "bad children don't deserve love" and how they cope with it)

The crux of the matter seems to be... did Andy really feel bad about Nina, or was his primary concern going to jail and being separated from Leyley? Is the trauma that stemmed from the incident from the feeling of guilt and remorse, or because that was the point where he became his sister's plaything and could not escape from her anymore? This seems, from what I've seen, what split the fans.

Rewatching the scene, Andy's first coherent dialogue is all about how the situation looks. "Why would have she clawed the lid if she was there willingly?" "She'll start to rot" "They're gonna know!". This once again hints at how Andy's first concern is "can this be traced back to us?". But to be fair, Leyley was the one who first said "you took off the stick, so it looks like she went there willingly", so he's responding to her.

But then he says "they'll throw me in prison for the rest of my life!" Which is very. Mh :)

Interpretation 1: Andy is being as self-centered as kids are prone to be. Nothing more to look into.

Interpretation 2: Andy only cares about himself and the consequences he's going to suffer. His sister's fate is up in the air. Lowkey implies that Andy didn't care much about her before this mess happened.

Interpretation 3: he genuinely thinks he's the main culprit of this incident. I want to add that this line happens before Leyley starts to hammer into his head that now he's bad and no one will love him anymore :) this would imply that Andy felt actual guilt.

There is probably not a concrete answer as of now. I hope episode 3 has more flashbacks because man they are so fascinating.

Anyway, to get back to the point. Andrew is not "evil". Andrew is a profoundly damaged person who was forced to become the everything of his even more damaged sister. Ashley is the "criminal mind", as it were... but to me, it looks like Andrew is on the same wavelength - remember, Ashley mused to herself that the dead neighbour was "a lot of meat", but Andrew, after the initial shock, immediately started to consider the implicit proposal of eating him. While Ashley wears her heart on her sleeve, is painfully honest, and couldn't care less about what anyone (except her bro) thinks of her anymore, Andrew is profoundly in denial about his own "abnormal" thoughts, and the difference between Decay and Burial is how he decides to accept himself.

Does that make him a better person? Well, he seems to be able to fit in more, at least. He's charming and can seemingly attract girls very easily, much to Ashley's chagrin. Maybe, without Ashley, he'd be able to live a normal life without crimes and all. But again, to me it looks like he lacks a moral compass in general, even though he has a strong sense of guilt and responsibility (which to me stems from being Leyley's sole caretaker since a tender age).

As to him being an abuser... well, he does threaten to slap and backhand Ashley a few times. She even calls him "wifebeater" at one point. Not enough to call him an abuser, but the threat of him becoming physical is always there. He's more than capable of subduing Ashley, when he wants to. Ashley's abuse is much more overt and constant, with her manipulation and guilttrips (and she got physical at least once too), but Andrew calmly choking Ashley and making her make a case for her life... has some implications.

I don't think I'm making sense lol. TCOAAL is a fascinating game that hides all sorts of moral questions underneath its over-the-top tone, and I love it.

[transscribepage]

If there's any one trope I try to avoid when writing characters, it's tragic backstories.

Don't get me wrong! Tragic backstories can be great! They can work really well and be awesome and cool. There are definitely good tragic backstories and clever twists on them too. But there's this thing in a lot of writing- especially in fantasy, my favorite genre- where it feels like you have to give every character a tragic backstory to be interesting. But that really isn't true at all.

However, issues with tragic backstories aside, I really do just tend to prefer characters who are built on things other than that one horrible, life-changing moment in their past, and you'll probably struggle to count the number of good, still-breathing parents in media.

When you try and write a character without giving them a tragic backstory, you're forced to write other things about them; if you're still focused on their backstory, you get things like where they were born, what they do or did for a living, and various, ""uninteresting"" things that happened in their life that influence who they are today.

But these things are important; the more tragedy you put in the backstory, the more you have to spend time explaining the past instead of spending time in the present, and tragedy always comes at a cost.

Dead parents mean no parent relationship, which is important in the development of a human being; a razed village means no community or culture, betrayal and deep introversion mean no friends or family; the aspects of this person's present life are few and far between, and their past is littered with ashes, not a world for a character to live and and have lived in; taking these things away doesn't just burn the past, it burns the future you can write about, too. Too much tragedy can leave the character and the world you're building feel colorless; painting in only black, with no shades or colors at all, only creates more black.

A character who isn't defined by the tragedy in their lives operates differently; instead of being pushed forward by their past, they move forward of their own accord; they act with more autonomy because their every action doesn't come from their past.

Not to mention, most people do not build their entire life around their past traumas. (emphasis on most people,) there are fascinating people who are fascinating because of what they're actively doing, their futures and hopes and dreams, rather than their history.

To make an example; Reif has a very tragic past that has scarred her for life, while Treya had a mostly normal upbringing. Reif is running from her past, afraid of what might happen if she fails to outpace it, and Treya is a traveling merchant who has heard stories growing up about an ancient civilization and wishes someday to see it for herself. From just this description, we don't know that much about Reif, but we can start to picture Treya already; a traveling merchant and aspiring archaeologist screams opportunistic, ambitious, and bold, with a penchant for seeing the world.

Reif's story is going to be defined by flashbacks that explain her actions, either before or after they happen. Her story is about her past, despite taking place in the present; her story is entirely rooted in her, and everything from there stems from that backstory.

Treya's story, however, is about her life as a traveling merchant as well as an aspiring archaeologist; she's traveling, trading, and working with other merchants while trying to uncover a great secret; perhaps a trade network she knows can clue her in on a rumor about ancient pottery from some unknown civilization; Treya's story traces all over the place, from the world's economy and local businesses to lost empires and mysteries uncovered from deep beneath the soil.

Reif's story could absolutely be interesting- Reif is an interesting, complicated, fleshed-out character, or at least she'll have to be, because her story is riding on us being interested in her. If she isn't compelling herself, than why do we want to know more about her and why she does what she does?

Treya's story, however, is also interesting without ever having any tragedy; without barely talking about her past, either. Treya is motivated to do things that move the plot along and enrich the world. She wants to do things beyond the scope of herself; if we're interested in this ancient fallen society, or the merchants and economy of this world, or how Treya blends these two together to work out for her, then we'll probably like Treya because of that.

Tragic backstories can be great; but they're not the one and only, absolutely necessary, tried and true method of writing characters, and they can trap you into corners and holes while writing.

[genuflectx]

It's been a year since this comic and seven months since I started playing VRChat regularly. This is a bit of a follow up that's been on the mind for a while now.

Even though the prior comic was a way for me to remind myself that no, I'm not just some angry person who can't communicate, I've still obviously internalized a lot of the pain that's come from being interpreted like that. Even today, she still interprets even the smallest soft-spoken disagreement between myself and my now wife as being some sort of huge blow out argument that will rip the house apart.

I know it stems from her own previous family trauma, and that hurt people hurt people, but I think our clashing problems and ways of living have just worn down on all of us over time by being housemates. It's incredibly sad to me having someone go from feeling like a friend, talking about deep things, and going through major events together, to how avoidant we are of each other today because we just haven't meshed in a very long time.

I can be judgmental, and stubborn, and have mean thoughts, but through making new friends I'm reminded I can also be kind, and tolerant, and accommodating of differences and needs. Just because I don't get along with someone, and that someone sees me as one thing, doesn't mean that it's true or that its the only perception of me. I can be the person who gets irrationally annoyed when I think someone is doing something dumb and I can also be the person who wants to give hugs and tell my kid friends to be kinder to themselves and that I care about them getting enough sleep.

I guess this is also a glance at how VRC has been going for me, seven months deep and almost 300 hours in. When I first started playing and stopped being mute, actually making acquaintances and then more regular friends, I suppose I was surprised how everyone looked at me like I'm an angel. It was a stark difference to how bad I had been feeling about my personality after being cooped up in this house with the same people for years. Maybe I do have bad or just generally annoying (but not morally wrong) traits, but even so, these traits aren't nearly as all-encompassing or as strongly seen as I thought they were.

People actually do like me, either for my personality or in spite of some of my annoyances. After everything, I think I am still trying to re-learn this, and often still doubt myself. Not being able to turn your brain off may be great for keeping yourself in check, but sometimes I wish it would just give it a rest and let me be me. I wonder if I mask more than I think I do, even though I know I mask a lot less in VRC than out in the real world (sans in front of my wife).

That's really it. I hope I can keep being kinder to myself.

[atherflame-theconcubus]

Ok, so I’ve had multiple sun and moon show, alternate universes rolling through my head, but one that’s recently just been rotting in my brain is my own take on a swap au that I’ve been calling swap shuffle.

It has a pretty similar plot line to the sun and moon show, however, there’s some important differences stemming from the fact that eclipse managed to figure out, alternate universes exist via finding out about the canon show. He struggled to catch up with the whole show, but he managed to, this leads to certain events playing out differently, such as they’re being a much shorter time with the timeout box & eclipse telling lunar in a panic that if they leave sun alone, there is a high likelihood that moon is going to kill sun (it’s still happens, but lunar eclipse get there, just after it happens)

I’m currently gonna go over who takes whose place within this universe, because while not, everyone has been figured out, yet, a good amount have

Eclipse takes moon’s place, & while not being the best brother, he does try to make it up to lunar. The fact he has seen the cannon show has allowed him to avoid a few mistakes (such as not telling lunar about the bit of kill code earlier on) but also leads to new issues & changes certain situations (Sun being blown up).

Lunar takes sun’s place in the au, he’s still short, but he’s much taller than he’s ever been in the show. They also has a tendency to not fully listen/take things seriously (how the moon situation got as bad as it had). Their July 16th happened on November 16th, so lunar usually gets very quiet on the days leading up to the anniversary of a massacre.

Sun takes lunar’s place, & has had a few panic attacks remembering October, though he usually gets help getting through these ptsd induced episodes thanks to his family. For a while Sun had the same issue lunar had of putting his trauma on a pedestal, though that was before he jumped universes. He managed to meet some alternate versions of others that (in sun’s words) “suffered more than I have”

Moon takes eclipse’s place, & he’s a bit more toned down than eclipse. He does attempt to have his abuse towards his younger brother be much more subtle (the best way I can describe. It is a lot of praise that slowly becomes less and less) which slowly turned more physical over the course of their takeover. Moon is also responsible for the creation of Ruin, who was finished on November 15th, & activated the next day

Jack-o-moon & solar flare swap places, I don’t have much to say about them yet though. I’m still working everything out for them

Chica takes Monty’s place, though she’s not really into scamming. She does run a fitness program that she swears by though. She’s one of the smartest animatronics in the plex (behind eclipse by a while) but she’s way too trusting & empathetic for her own good, even when her gut tells her otherwise.

(I don’t really know much about the other shows, but Monty takes Chica’s place, Roxanne and Freddie swap places, along with foxy & glamrock bonnie)

(Update: in lew of a recent realization, the puppet and golden Freddy are being swapped. I genuinely thought both of them were gods. Only one is.)

Old eclipse takes Nexus's place. I’m still figuring out everything for him, but during Eclipse's spiral, old eclipse woke up & was immediately hit with whatever dark lunar put in them, essentially sacrificing himself to keep everyone safe as his last act of self. once under the new code, he starts trying to forcibly take control, ending with Golden Freddy using magic to separate the two & launch Old Eclipse into space. it was at that moment that the Old Eclipse was forever lost to the violent code.

Shuffle time!

Earth takes the place of kc, & she takes a more manipulative mother approach to her two sons when she claims them, not playing favorites, though she does have one. When she was in eclipse’s mindscape, she made it look like an overgrown meadow, using vines to freak eclipse & sun out. While she does eventually agree to a life of peace, it didn’t change her general behaviors and thoughts about ruin & moon, with her actively making it difficult for lunar & eclipse to figure out Commet powers. As well as making her death more realistic

Ruin takes the place of bloodmoon, though he lacks a twin. He generally is unhinged, but ironically hates killing, calling it a chore. He developed his sadistic nature with his hunting to make it entertaining for him, as he’d rather toy with others than kill them (he has a bloodlust, but he despises the taste of blood) when revived by kc, he knew something was off, but played along. Unlike the cannon blood twins, ruin regrets November 16th, stating that he didn’t enjoy the screams of the children while they were dying, & that the children were too weak.

KC takes ruin’s place, & though I don’t have much of an idea for him yet, at least, while infected, I do know that him uninfected is much nicer than he was while infected, though he still isn’t really friendly. He does wish to try fixing his relationship with ruin, as infected KC viewed him as a tool which cured KC thinks theirs a lot more that everyone is missing.

The blood twins take the place of earth, and while they are neutral, they do have their biases, which leads to some disagreement between them & others. The twins are really calm, with the younger twin being extremely calm. An interesting thing is that the creator of this universe only intended for the older twin to exist, but conditions were just right that bloody & harvest developed as two sentient ai, with harvest hiding his existence as he wasn’t supposed too exist. Bloody is closer to eclipse while harvest is closer to lunar.

Francis and Frank are swapped. I don’t know much about these two in Cannon so it’ll be fun to work with them

I’ll go over others like good moon at a later date as this post is getting long, so here’s some fun facts.

Lunar is the eldest brother in the daycare family, with harvest being the youngest

Harvest & Chica end up having a romantic relationship that’s more of a slow burn figuring things out than cannon Monty x earth.

Eclipse helps bloody realize he’s aroace.

Sun has a plushie empire & hyperfixates on them

Ruin has a tea adiction, even if his systems force him to throw it up if it doesn’t have blood in it (90% of the time it’s blood free)

Eclipse has anger issues he’s been seeing a therapist for

Bloody & harvest are more like emotional support dogs than therapist siblings.

Bloody & harvest have their own unique hairstyles (harvest’s is a long braid while bloody’s is a shoulder bob). when combined both hairstyles are visible at once

In the lord moon universe, sun is held captive in a tower, earth has grown to actually regret her parenting decisions & genuinely misses ruin (she’s the landscaper) & jack is the bitter gaurd. Eclipse and a group of citizens & survivors from moon grabbing the commet are planning a rebellion against moon. Lunar is the servant their

Earth subtly favored moon over ruin, as he was the one to activate her. That & ruins hatred of killing pushed moon into her favorites, though she never openly showed it

KC has been caught trying to fix the balloon world arcade cabinet, and only the balloon world arcade cabinet

Eclipse usually uses the nickname radiant when traveling universes. He doesn’t know why, but he assumes it’s because he likes the sound of it.

Sun isn’t resurrected with Commet powers, but he does teach himself magic for defense was resurrected by puppet, who’s now training him

Old eclipse changes his name to Araceli

Araceli's last moment he was himself was during endgame, where Eclipse was begging Chickpea & golden to do something to stop him

[mecchantheotaku]

Explaining Today

Content warnings: suicide, abuse, sexual harrassment

I'm sorry for everything that happened on my blog today, and I feel a need to explain my actions.

I felt unhappy when I woke up to find that my trapped nerve hadn't fully healed and planned to spend the day coping by indulging in my interests.

This wasn't the only reason I planned to spend the day like that though.

I didn't want to mention this for both privacy and triggering reasons, but I am currently in a very unsafe environment.

My stepfather has repeatedly violated my boundaries both by pressuring me when I've made it clear I'm neither interested nor comfortable with his ideas, and by making very inappropriate comments to me on multiple occasions despite me telling him multiple times not to (as well as outing myself as asexual, which he denies I really am).

I don't want to cause any more drama than I already have in my house, so right now, I'm forcing myself to pretend like I'm fine.

I can't leave the house because I'm unfit for work, and my autism and social anxiety issues make it difficult to function without help.

I hadn't heard of there being a strike going on until after I'd already posted, and I felt upset at that. And because I felt upset, I felt even more upset with myself for once again thinking in a way that everyone else is understandably against.

I tried multiple times to remove myself from the world and only stopped when my boyfriend called me and talked me out of it.

Now, the reason I haven't posted anything about Palestine. There's two reasons. The first being that I was honestly too exhausted after all that to feel up to doing anything. The second reason is because I've been avoiding the topic as a whole because, for obvious reasons, it triggers my fear of hostility (which, as I mentioned before, stems from childhood trauma). I know that's a selfish reason. I'm not going to defend myself for it. But just know that while I can't do anything to help, I do support the people helping victims of this nightmare and do want there to be a peaceful end to this conflict.

Once again, I am very sorry to everyone for what happened today. I know I should probably get therapy for all the issues I have, but I'm not in a position to go out and seek it myself. I had a conversation with my mum about it, but knowing her, she's probably already forgotten.