#my impression is that everything he does is for a bit and personal enjoyment

[melodead]

you know from experience that hungry students will go through many, many lengths to sate that hunger—and that’s why you’ve decided to hike a mountain on a school night.

you take a cutting of berries and slide them into the glass jar. hopefully, these aren’t poisonous. they’ll need to be checked by professor crewel first, obviously, but it’s better to be safe than sorry. grim might survive eating poison. you, on the other hand? not so much. a specialist would need to vet them first.

“i wouldn’t recommend eating those, if that’s what you’re planning.”

or a very knowledgeable student.

you turn your head. jade leech smiles politely at you from the long shadow of a tree, his usual suspicious demeanor offset by a knitted yellow cap and several layers of hiking gear. his lantern casts a soft glow across his face. you wonder why he has it out at all. the sun has only just begun to set, after all.

you must be staring too much, because jade steps out of the shadow and crouches down next to you, setting the lamp on the ground. “it’s good to have one in case of any delays. the mountains can be rather perilous, as you must be aware by now,” he explains. “one reckless act, and nature’s bounty can prove fatal,”—he taps your jar—“such as these.”

you blink at him slowly. his yellow eye almost glows in the dying light of day, but they are not predatory. not today.

“right. thank you for the notice.” you screw the lid back on, put it into your basket, and push yourself from the ground. he begins to do the same. “i’ll be leaving now. i don’t want to inconvenience you any further.” yes, he did just get here. no, you will not be acknowledging that.

“not at all. on the contrary, it is lovely to see you, prefect, especially on such a pleasant day. ah, but that reminds me,”—oh, sevens. please don’t say what i think you’re going to say—“seeing as we’re both here, perhaps you wouldn’t mind a bit of a hike to the peak? the sunset is beautiful this time of year.”

you swear. internally, of course, but the idea is the same.

you really hoped to avoid octavinelle after azul’s incident. it was one thing to be riddle or leona; they hadn’t targeted you personally. moreover, riddle has relaxed on some of his rules, and leona doesn’t bother you any more than he talks to you (which is very rarely). you got over it.

octavinelle, though, had contracted your friends into forced labor (it was mostly their own fault), stolen your house (you willingly agreed to hand it over), and sabotaged you in getting it back (in a deal you knew was sketchy). it was, it was—!

oh, who are you kidding? you feel hurt. that’s the long and short of it. it is juvenile and illogical and out of character for you and you hate it, but there is no time to unpack that, and the consequences for purposeful ignorance are little to none. jade leech couldn’t possibly have cared anyways.

“-efect? prefect?” he taps you gently. “are you alright?”

but you must have forgotten how entertaining the students find you.

you step back, hands gripping the strap of your bag. “i don’t think that’s a good idea. if i went with you, the sun would be gone by the time we got there. we’ll be better off going our separate ways.”

“i beg to differ.” his eyes glance at your bag. several jars clink emptily. “you’re foraging, yes? there happens to be a berry hedge on the trail down. i could lead you there, if you so wish.”

“that’s okay. it’ll be dark.”

“then i could accompany you on the way down,” he offers, “if the dark is what worries you.”

“i’ve faced worse—and i really should be getting back to ramshackle soon. grim will be hungry.” not to mention the three other teenage boys who might be ransacking the place.

“even so, you can never be too careful.” 

you cut the pleasantries. “and what would you get out of it?”

“pardon?”

“what are you getting in return?” your eyes bore into his. “i don’t have anything to give you, but frankly, i’m not interested in any kind of exchange if that’s what you have in mind. you won’t get anything from me.”

jade leech blinks at you twice in rapid succession, eyebrows raised, before his features school themselves into something neutral. concealed, even. you’re almost comforted by the sight of normal jade.

key word: almost.

“is that what you think of me?”

“how else am i supposed to think?” your eyebrows furrow. “i could never tell with you before, but i knew you weren’t malicious at the very least. i don’t have a clue where we stand now.” excuses. truths. you hold your basket closer. “does it matter, anyways? i don’t have any business with you.”

the sun is lower on the horizon now. the lamplight flickers.

jade leech sighs—sighs!—so inaudible you might’ve thought it was the wind. his eyes fall shut for a moment. when they open again, his left one shines gold. “you’re still nursing injuries, are you not? as vice housewarden of octavinelle, it would be remiss of me to ignore someone personally hurt by the actions of our dorm. i’ll ensure your safety against anything on the way down.” his gaze meets yours. “an eye for an eye, yes?”

you scrunch your face. “i don’t want your eye. i don’t want anyone’s eyes.”

jade blinks at you—(wow, that makes it, what, three times now?)—before unexpectedly giving into chuckles. it’s breathy, and true, and a whole host of other adjectives you wouldn’t normally assign him. that must be the floyd in him, you think as you stand there awkwardly. you wonder if you should just leave.

jade gets a hold of himself soon enough though, and he ushers you down the mountain under the guise of benevolence and whatever else he tries to sell to you on the way. you ignore it the best you can.

what you don’t see is the lingering grin tugging at the corners of his mouth, the entire trip down.

[vulpisnocturna]

Hey, El, dear! How are you?

If it's ok for you, can I have Madara's NSFW alphabet? To maintain my unhealthy levels of obsession over him

I'll totally understand if it's too much 💖

Hey my lovely, totally fine! It just took me a while, but here it is!

NSFW - MDNI

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Madara can be pretty rough when he has a session with you, and aftercare can be super important, but sometimes he tends to forget that not everyone has his energy, endurance or strength. What’s more, if he doesn’t trust you that much, he will be skittish and unnerved by the idea of showing his vulnerability and his caring side to you. If, however, you have been in a committed relationship with him for a long time, he will definitely give you a massage to soothe your muscles and maybe a warm bath. Cuddles will ensue if you initiate them. Madara will blush as though he didn’t just fuck your brains out twenty minutes earlier.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Madara loves his hair. It’s a guilty pleasure of his to feel your fingers running through it, and though it looks quite untamed and a bit like a bird’s nest, he is very proud of it because of its length, volume and the way it flows dramatically in the wind. In a partner, Madara is quite the thigh enjoyer. He loves squeezing them, laying his head on them, biting them and leaving love bites on them. They are comforting and quite sensual. For this reason, he is also quite fond of thigh highs and any outfit that lets him catch a glimpse of them. Also very fond of being squished by a pair of thighs.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

Madara loves cumming inside you. Because he’s an Uchiha, mainly, and breeding kinks, but also because it makes him feel as though you truly belong to him. It’s as though he is marking you, corrupting you, in a way.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He sometimes likes soft, tender, slow sex. Most people wouldn’t be ashamed of such a thing, but for a man who has built up a reputation as a heartless warrior, he thinks it will make him look weak and easily exploitable.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Madara definitely knows what he’s doing. He’s been around a long while, and as someone who never really settled down, he probably had his little escapades from time to time. He likes sex, he likes getting physical with people, and he has to prove that he’s the best at everything he does. He can’t afford to look like a floundering teen when confronted with a naked body.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

He loves doggy style. He really likes the visuals, the arched back and your ass presented to him, as well as pulling your hair as he slams into you. Madara is a rough lover most of the time, and quite a dominant one too, and he likes the feeling of control it gives him. Props if your arms are tied behind your back and your face is pressed against the mattress.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

Madara likes to be taken seriously when he beds you. However, he’s been known to crack one or two mordant quips from time to time, and they’re not the most… tactful. If you can take it as part of a degradation kink, more power to you. If not, it can kill the mood a little.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

The carpet does match the drapes, but he keeps it neatly trimmed. He likes looking his best and giving out the impression he’s so well put together and definitely doesn’t have any problems, and his appearance plays a huge role into that.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

He can be romantic with an established partner from time to time, but sex feels more like a battle for power to him than it does a declaration of love, which would be much more domestic in his case than sexual. Sex is where he can let go and showcase his physicality and prowess, and he likes a partner that can play that game with him and let him have control in the bedroom.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

He is a pretty physical person, and sometimes, he needs to release the tension that builds up inside him. He masturbates pretty often, and his imagination is quite vivid. He also takes to creating genjutsu where he can elevate his sensory experiences by creating an illusion of you joining him.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

The breeding kink is pretty much a given. He loves the idea of putting a child in you just as much as he loves the idea of tying you down to him so you can never leave him (abandonment issues much?).

Dom/sub is also a big one. He loves the feeling of power and of someone trusting him to control their pleasure. It gives him a thrill to have someone submit to him. He’s also big on begging.

Humiliation kink is equally hot to Madara. He likes talking dirty to his partner, he likes calling them names, it makes it sound more taboo and that much hotter to him.

Edging because he’s a little bastard who likes to tease. Punishment and lessons are often in his bedroom vocabulary, and one of his favourites is edging because of how desperate you get to have release. The sight of you squirming and begging really turns him on, and so does the knowledge that your orgasm, when he finally allows you to climax, will be that much more intense.

Corruption kink is another kink of his. He enjoys the thought of tarnishing something pure and moulding it into his image.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

He’s a pretty traditional guy in that way. He likes to keep things private, and fuck in the bedroom, or anywhere in the house, really. Sometimes he gets the occasional urge to show off and be an exhibitionist, but not in a way that would allow anyone to actually see your naked body. For example, he’d fuck you against the window of a tall building, or make you scream loud enough the whole neighbourhood knows just how good he is.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Lingerie, playful teasing, strong individuals that are not intimidated by him are all things that turn Madara on. He enjoys a challenge, and what’s better than making a powerful, feisty individual submit to him and give him control in bed?

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Madara is not big on sharing at all. Threesomes are a no go, and neither is watching porn together or voyeurism. He can do everything by himself, he doesn’t need anyone’s help.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

He likes giving, just to make you squirm, but he really loves receiving. It gets him going and it’s also a power trip of sorts, especially when you give him permission to fuck your mouth. And when you look up at him as you do it… don’t expect him to go gentle.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Madara is the fast and rough type most of the time, but because he’s a patient fellow, sometimes he goes slow and rough. Hours of endless torment and orgasm after orgasm because he has unlimited stamina and unlimited hunger.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

He likes quickies. They’re a quick way to get rid of sexual tension and let out some steam. Expect to be bent down the kitchen counter and taken care of whilst the food’s on the stove.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

He’s game. He loves to experiment, but he won’t do anything that makes him feel too vulnerable. He likes taking calculated risks, but he doesn’t like being in a position where he will completely lose control.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

All night. You’d have to tell him you can’t take it anymore, because if it were up to him, he could do it 5 or 6 times in a day.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

He definitely likes toys. They’re just a way to further torment his partner with pleasure, they heighten the sensations and make it that much more intense.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

A lot. You’d think he was torturing you with pleasure from how much this man likes to tease, he’s like a cat playing with its dinner. He enjoys the feeling it gives him, the desperation, the longing.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

Madara is vocal verbally, but his noises are relatively quiet and far between. He will groan and give low moans and grunts, but he won’t shout or moan loudly. He will talk to you throughout, and his voice will sound soft and smooth, because he likes to give off the impression he’s always in control.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

Madara likes fucking virgins. It’s just a little guilty pleasure of his, he loves the innocence they give off and he loves corrupting them, transforming that innocence into debauchery just for him.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

Madara is pretty tall, lean but toned, with a few scars and a nimble, agile figure. His cock is thick and fairly long, around 6 ½ inches. He’s also a shower.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

He’s got a high sex drive. He lives for battle and sex, and anything that gets his blood pumping.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Not that quickly. He likes watching you sleep so soundly after a little session. He will cradle you in his arms and observe you, carding his fingers through your hair and watching over you in such a vulnerable state. However, soon, your warm body and soft breathing will lull him into a peaceful sleep.

[intimidating-fettuccine]

Father figure slender to the reader???

Tyyyyy <3

I've written so many Dad Slender posts with the reader (I made a huge post of them at one point but I couldn't find it this morning >:( sorry for that) so this just random dad Slender HCs, and I hope you enjoy <3

Incredibly involved parent in your life. Slender has a shit relationship with his dad, so he wants to make sure he can be a good dad for you. He always asks about your interests and checks in on your schooling or work. I think I said in a different Dad Slender post that he likes to have a cup of tea/coffee/whatever you'd prefer with you every day so the two of you can just sit down and talk every day, about life, about stress, about anything going on that you'd like to. He can't remember the last time he had a decent conversation with his own father, so it brings him so much joy to be able to speak to you every day. He understands some days you might not be up to it, and that's okay. He just wants to be as close to you as he can as a parent to make sure you have a good relationship. Bonus days sometimes occur when his mom or one of his brothers will stop by and join in, and those are your favorite days because they always spill tea about Slender to you to try and embarrass him, and it always works. Those are always your favorite days, and much to his chagrin, Slender is very aware of that fact.

He's the type of dad to be nervous when you start dating. He's not gonna threaten your partner when you introduce them to him for the first time (everyone else in the mansion does a good enough job at that) but he does fret and worry over if they're a good person that will treat you right. He would probably have the "What are your intentions with my child" talk with them and try and feel out their personality from that, but ultimately he does trust you to make good decisions for yourself. If your partner ends up being a bad choice, he will step in if necessary and comfort and help you in any way that he can, with lots of hugs and desserts and comforting conversations. I feel like when you experience your first break up he curls up with you on the couch with big bowls of ice cream and your favorite movies just like you would with a best friend, with a box of tissues by his side and lots of love. He's really great at comforting you and helping you feel better. If you end up dating someone in the mansion, everyone else doubles up on the threats of said creep better treat you right, but Slender almost relaxes a bit more. He trusts them to know to treat you right (otherwise Slender might just have to teach them a very, very intensive lesson). He definitely has his top picks in the mansion and he'd be happy if you ended up dating them.

Loves cooking with you. He has a lot of family recipes, and it would bring him so much joy to be able to teach them to you. He's incredibly patient with you, and a wonderful teacher, so it's a very enjoyable experience for both of you. He also gets super excited if you want to try making something new and you ask him to help you with it. He'll accompany you to the store and help you pick out ingredients, teaching you the best brands for each thing, and how to pick out the best produce. This is corny, but he totally has matching aprons to wear with you whenever you're cooking anything, and if you need it he enjoys helping to tie it for you because you'll always be his little one no matter how old you get. He always offers advice for anything if you need it, and I think he likes doing things beside you so you can watch and learn at the same time. If you need a whole onion chopped, for instance, he places two cutting boards side by side and gives you half to chop while he takes the other so you can both work on it together and you can watch what he does. He's always impressed with everything you cook, and it would seriously be the most heartwarming thing in the world to see you take on his love for cooking.

[gourmetofglut]

The Mischaracterization of Ferris: A thread analyzing Re: Zero's most misinterpreted and overlooked character.

Note: This is a re-edit of a thread I wrote on Twitter. I recently decided to start using Tumblr a bit more. Since I've also been wanting to back up most of my threads, I figured I might as well move everything here. This is the first re-edit I'll be posting on this site. It was one of my favorites to write, so I hope it's enjoyable!

Side story spoilers for the entire thread. Arc 8 spoilers in the speculation section (will be marked since so many people aren't caught up).

For novel readers of Re: Zero, Ferris stands as one of the most divisive characters in the fandom. Considering his poor utilization in the anime and his role in the story within Arc 3, it's easy to see why.

On one hand, Ferris is one of the most outwardly aggressive characters toward Subaru in Arc 3. He makes no secret of his disdain from the start and consistently throws jabs at him every opportunity he gets. This behavior can certainly leave a negative first impression.

On the other hand, Ferris is quite a fascinating character who serves an important role within the narrative of Arc 3. He doesn't let Subaru off as easy as everyone else, which is exactly what makes seeing him grow respect for Subaru satisfying.

Whichever opinion you hold, that’s mostly irrelevant today. Instead, I will be simply discussing his character and his role in the story, as well as arguing in favor of many of his merits that people overlook.

Ferris's primary role is similar to all the Royals Candidates' knights: serving as a foil for Subaru. I've explained the similarities between Subaru and the other knights before, but to sum it up as quickly as possible all 3 of them represent a version of what Subaru could be.

Reinhard is a version of what Subaru could've been if he were the typical isekai protagonist, Julius is a lot more complicated but he’s essentially what Subaru could've been if he were granted enough power to face his enemies on even ground, and Al is Subaru if he had been just a bit unlucky in where he had been sent; becoming someone who struggles to care and abuses his powers to the fullest.

Ferris is much the same, though it can be argued he parallels Subaru the hardest, except for maybe Al. The resemblance on paper between the two is uncanny. They are both physically weak men who often don't fit traditional gender roles and have the sole desire of helping a woman they love to achieve her dreams of becoming a Royal Candidate, no matter the personal costs to themselves.

To do this, they use an extraordinary power unique to them (in Subaru's case RB, and in Ferris' case his magic that is relative in power to an authority). Their need to rely on others for victory is a source of immense mental turmoil and often leaves them full of self-loathing.

They place immense value in the lives of others, even those who have or will harm them, to the point that they are willing to be harmed to help them. Seeing others casually disregard the lives of others serves as one of the things that anger them the most.

They are both prone to obsessively possessive behavior and have sometimes even directed it towards the one they love. This often leads to them getting in trouble due to their jealousy.

There are more similarities I could point out, but you get the point.

Where am I going with this though? Ferris is clearly a parallel to Subaru, but what does he represent regarding him? Put simply, I believe Ferris is meant to represent what Subaru could've been if his parents were just a bit different.

Parent and Child is one of the most crucial chapters for informing us about just the kind of person Subaru is. Perhaps the most important piece is how it helps us understand just how much of his current personality is a result of his father. Subaru not only looked up to him but actively mimicked him to achieve his goals. The pressure of the surrounding world caused him to default to trying to be his father instead of who he truly was. Subaru's parents weren't perfect. In fact, they were very flawed people. Regardless of this fact though, they are responsible for many of Subaru's positive traits.

The same is true for Ferris and his shitbag of a father. If you were to ask any novel reader what Ferris' defining trait as a character is, they would probably say anger or bitterness.

This isn't surprising, as that's how he typically acts towards everyone except Crusch and Fourier, even when it comes to friends such as Julius.

I would argue, however, that this is merely an act he defaults to when he is stressed or angry, similar to Subaru's mimicry of his own father.

During his bitter moments, such as his cold statement to Subaru as he leaves Crusch's mansion in Arc 4, Ferris is merely defaulting to what he has learned to be the best method of dealing with his stress...a method that is eerily similar to how Biehn sometimes acts in EX 1.

Whether Ferris acknowledges it or not, his attitude at his worst moments makes him come off like his father. He can be cruel, sometimes even callous. He shows intense rage when he doesn't get his way and attacks the part of his opponent that is most vulnerable.

This attitude can blind him to the point that he can even hypocritically act racist towards Emilia. Ferris' entire life has been defined by discrimination. In the face of someone he should know has faced many of the same issues, he once again acts almost exactly like his own father.

It was in the middle of a mental breakdown, but that does not excuse him just like it does not excuse Subaru.

Speaking of his parents, it's also notable how their inability to connect with Ferris parallels Naoko and Kenichi's struggles with Subaru.

Ferris' dad is a bombastic, loud man who was (once) well-respected and causes many of Ferris's issues through his actions and Ferris' emulation of him. His fatal flaw in the end was that he could not understand Ferris, similar to how Kenichi could not fully understand Subaru.

Ferris' mom, on the other hand, fully understood the distress he was under but did not have the confidence to interfere or make a change as Ferris wasted away, similar to Naoko's inability to help Subaru when he most needed it.

That's not to say Kenichi or Naoko are even a thousandth as bad as either of those two, but their struggles with their child deeply parallel each other.

Back on track though, I want to highlight a bit more of Ferris' parallels with his father using perhaps the most damning example.

This specific scene is from "The Saga of the Great Crusch-sama Begins." When faced with his mother, whom he hates so much, he attempts to stab her in the chest. Crusch gets caught in the crossfire causing Felix to freak out and unlock his water magic to save her.

What can at first be written off as just a unique origin for Ferris' water magic gets recontextualized hard in EX 1, where it's revealed his father killed his mother in the exact same method.

It's such an eerie similarity and something that I feel gets overlooked too often when discussing Ferris.

As shown in scenes like the one above, Ferris often projects this image of hatred, bitterness, and malice. It's easy to write that off as just the kind of person he is as so many often do...

...but there's obviously more to it than this. There is far more to Ferris than his mimicry of his father.

Ferris doesn't allow himself to be vulnerable very often in the story. Only when he is with Fourier and Crusch, as well as when he is in the most intense moments of crisis, does he show who he actually is. Stress is the best test of character after all.

The best example to me? His confrontation with the father he so often emulates.

If Ferris was actually as vindictive as he so often outwardly acts, how would you expect him to react to the death of a man he hated so much?

Wouldn't he taunt him? Wouldn't he make his last moments a living hell? Wouldn't he crow in pleasure at his agony? Would you be able to even blame Ferris if he made Biehn's last moments hell?

You would expect that...but that's not how he reacts. At that moment, watching as the man who tortured him so much dies an awful death, he just shows sadness. He thinks about the possibility that they could've just worked things out. He just wishes that things could be different.

Despite everything his father had done to him, despite all the rage at the world Ferris projects, the moment he is put into a scenario he likely dreamed of he can't help but feel pity that this was the only route he could take. He never wanted to hurt even Biehn of all people.

And this, I believe, is Ferris's actual defining trait underneath his persona of cynicism and bitterness: kindness and a greater love for life than perhaps anyone else in the series.

Ferris's power, as Fourier once said, is the kindest in the world. At his core, Ferris is just as kind as his power.

Think about it. Despite Ferris's words, what is the thing that upsets him most?

People who waste their lives. Whether it be Subaru, Fourier, a random Vollachian guard, or even Witch Cultists...Ferris can't bring himself to watch life be thrown away. It just hurts him, regardless of how horrible the person is.

Just like Subaru, Ferris wants to help everyone, even if it costs him so much. The pain that he feels when he is unable to do so is immeasurable, as Subaru himself states in Volume 8. He is struggling with the same realization as Subaru: saving some people is impossible.

So where will this lead? What does this have to do with the themes of the story? Well, to answer that, I’ll have to take a little diversion to talk about one of the more…difficult topics involving Ferris.

Ferris and his relationship with gender is something that I feel a lot of the fanbase is really fucking weird about. Even ignoring the pretty deep-rooted transphobia in a lot of discussions involving him (he isn't trans, but he is heavily trans-coded and there really shouldn't be so much of an issue in letting people read into that), there's a feverish desire to deny that his status as a person not conforming to gender norms matters at all. All too often, people reduce it to just a fetish or something to make jokes about.

The reason this is such a bafflingly stupid take though is because of how blatant the importance is to anyone who has read EX 1. Even Tappei himself has stated that many of the things he wants to do with Ferris could not be done without this aspect of his character.

Ferris's non-conformance is part of a promise made with Crusch. Ferris took on her femininity while Crusch took on his masculinity. It's a promise between the two that proves their devotion to one another. It's the ultimate symbol of their affection for one another.

In Aganau IF Ferris dresses and acts more masculine, precisely because his connection to Crusch no longer exists.

I'd also argue it's why he continues to dress as he does even when Crusch no longer has her memories, desperately holding onto the literal symbol of the bond between them.

However, unlike Crusch who seems to love who she is both when taking on more masculine and feminine traits, finding a balance between them; Ferris can't do the same. He sees it merely as a means to show his devotion rather than something he does for himself.

He constantly expresses that it is all for Crusch and Crusch alone. If anything he seems to resent his inability to fulfill any kind of masculine role, as shown once again in his conversation with Biehn in EX 1.

When pushed to finally unleash all his true feelings to Biehn, what does he bring up as the main reason for his resentment? His abuse? His coldness? His murder of his mother? Any of the innumerable unforgivable things Biehn has done to him?

No. Ferris points at his body. He anguishes over his skinny arms, his inability to wield a sword, his lack of muscle, and his lack of fighting prowess. He hates his lack of masculine features and how he's unable to live up to his idea of what Crusch's knight should be.

He literally sees his masculinity as something stolen from him by his father; leaving him so empty that he needed something else to fill that void.

Crusch gave him something to fill that void. Crusch gave him a way to live. Crusch filled his soul...but he still resents what he "has" to be.

Now does that mean he resents Crusch? No, of course not. But he does resent that this is the only thing he can do for her; the only person he can be. Deep down, he doesn't seem to want to be the way he is, and instead of trying to change that he gives in to despair.

He's stuck in that hatred, in that desire to meet Crusch's expectations, and in that moment where a starving child begged to be released and was finally brought into the light. In many ways, he acts like a child.

This is quite literally represented in him preventing himself from going through puberty; a symbol in many stories of transitioning from childhood to adulthood. He sees his current form as a shackle whether he realizes it or not.

Now does that mean that Ferris should disregard his femininity entirely? Throwing away the representation of his love for Crusch and something that has defined him for so long seems as self-destructive as staying stuck. What's the solution? Where is his arc going?

Well, before that, I want to cover one last thing before I have to delve into Arc 8 spoilers. There's a bit of a side tangent I want to go on.

With everything I've been able to point out up to here, it's clear that Ferris is a remarkably complex character. There's so much to read into and talk about.

So why is he so hated?

He's so similar to Subaru, possibly the most popular character in the novel fandom. Despite all the claims of him being the worst and me highlighting his character's flaws, he hasn't done anything more morally dubious than the vast majority of characters in this series, even when he was pushed to the edge. This is especially true when compared to some of the most popular characters like Subaru or Roswaal. Hell, characters even more directly belligerent than Ferris like Priscilla don't get half the hate (though Priscilla's perception has...its own issues).

Why does he get disregarded so often? Why is he often treated as shallow fetish fuel? Why is he just reduced to being an asshole in every discussion that involves him?

Well, I have a few I can point out.

The first is, most obviously, misinformation. A large portion of the novel reader base has not read Arcs 1-4 in the LN and has very warped views of some of the characters in that section of the story. Ferris is just the most blatant example.

I can't count the number of times I've heard people just blatantly lie about or exaggerate what Ferris did in Arc 3. From the "mana bomb" that has LITERALLY no basis in the text to the "brainwashing" scene treated as a comedy bit that is exaggerated to hell, people go out of their way to interpret him in the worst light possible.

Many of the people who haven't read those sections then see Ferris's ribbing of Subaru in Arc 5 and then run with those pieces of misinformation; spreading it to the point that many believe some blatant lies to be fact.

The second is simply that a lot of people in the fandom don't read the side stories. I don't particularly blame a lot of these people, as there is a lot to get through, but there are a lot of people who take advantage of this for...certain reasons.

This leads to the third point...shipping. Ferris suffers from "Die for our ship" syndrome (https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/DieForOurShip…). A lot of people like Crusch x Subaru and Crusch loves Ferris so that ends up being more than enough for some people to hate him.

That's not representative of even close to every Crusch x Subaru shipper, of course, it's just a notable trend that it's hard to pretend doesn't exist with some of them.

All of these factors often go hand-in-hand with the final factor: the fandom's immense double standards when it comes to certain characters.

I'm not going to go into deep detail with this as it would distract from the main point of the thread...but you know what I mean if you've interacted with the community for a significant period of time. It also doesn't help that many of the same people in this category tend to be incredibly bigoted.

Ferris isn't the only character subjected to these double standards, as characters like Emilia and Ram often face similar purposeful misinterpretations, but his frequently unfair critiques have affected his reputation negatively perhaps more than any other.

This isn't to say that this is all true for everyone who hates Ferris. There are numerous reasons you may just not be interested in his character.

However, I feel it's dishonest to pretend Ferris isn't often targeted far more than other characters for often lacking reasons.

With that out of the way, I can move on to the last thing I wanted to cover in this thread. I have established a lot here, so I want to speculate about the future.

From this point forward there are unmarked Arc 8 spoilers, so...you can't argue I wasn't careful. I don't blame you at all for leaving now and I thank you for reading my ramblings.

*

*

*

Are you still here? Ok, let's start.

With all of the above established, I want to return to the question of where Ferris' arc will go in the future. My belief? I think it will be something similar to what Pre-Amnesia Crusch has already realized, with Felix’s closest parallel in Subaru being close to doing the same.

Crusch, as I mentioned before, has found balance in the two aspects of her life. Throughout the story, she switches seamlessly between the two without a second thought. She is comfortable and happy with both parts of herself.

Subaru is also on a similar path. He feels most comfortable in embracing his feminine side, idealizing it through Natsumi. All his confidence is channeled into that persona, while the other two aspects of his personality (his main self who has all the self-worth of an abandoned puppy and his child self who is representative of his more masculine traits) are imbalanced.

Arc 8 seems to be going in a direction where he realizes how important all of these aspects of him are. All 3 have flaws. None of them are "complete," just pieces of the coherent whole that is Natsuki Subaru.

I believe a similar thing will happen with Ferris.

He will need to find a balance between Ferris, his feminine side that has defined him for so long, and Felix the masculine identity he craves. He needs to find a role that makes him as happy as Crusch was, accepting who he is while striving to become who he wants to be.

I don't expect that to be easy though. In fact, I think the path to get there will be immensely messy and self-destructive.

The idea of Ferris having a breakdown or lashing out has been well-foreshadowed throughout the story. He has had numerous smaller outbursts and has displayed similar problems to Arc 3 Subaru when pushed to an extreme. There's a large amount of toxicity in him that will rush out, sooner or later. It will likely take similar levels of suffering to force him to get a grip, possibly hurting Crusch in the process.

Who do I believe to be the trigger for this? My best guess is Capella.

It is quite possible Capella freed Sphinx and recreated her arms initially. Why would she do this? Why not? We're seeing firsthand how much of a monster Sphinx can be with the Sacrament of the Immortal King. Why wouldn't someone like Capella want something like that under her control?

Of course, Sphinx is almost certainly dying soon. Capella will need a replacement, and who's the only other potential user of the Sacrament? Ferris.

There's also the idea that Capella may have poisoned the Royal Family and, most importantly, Fourier. If Capella does become the main antagonist for Ferris, that could serve as motivation for him to want her dead regardless of his own reservations about killing.

Adding onto this is the fact that shapeshifting is a power with a long history of being associated with identity issues. Tappei likes making his antagonists strong narrative foils to his protagonists, so it would be interesting to contrast Ferris' identity issues with the potentially strong identity issues of Capella.

Finally, there's a lot of potential for her tragic past to parallel Ferris' past, with many implications that the Royal Family may not exactly have treated Emerada the best. The idea that the Royal Family may have locked her away is not implausible and it could make their connections even stronger.

Whatever that breakdown leads to, I expect Crusch and/or Subaru to be the one who snaps him out of it. This will likely be the catalyst that forces Ferris to find a balance. He'll need to let go of things like his self-blame over being unable to help Fourier, his internalized hatred of his current identity, his idealization of Crusch, and his need to save everyone. Ferris's love will finally allow him to grow and change into a person who is the middle ground between his desires and his true self.

After all, that's what Re: Zero is truly about: love and growth. Almost every character reflects this and, if my interpretation of Ferris is right, he could embody that theme just as much as Subaru himself does.

He could be a shining bastion of what this story is all about.

Of course, this is all just my interpretation and speculation. If you disagree with it, feel free to. I just hope I was able to make you appreciate Ferris a bit more/changed your mind on how much potential his character has.

I wish whoever is reading this a nice day!

[elvendoodles]

LEGO Elves Character Tier List

Back at it again, this time with another tier list! This time I've created a character tier list for you to rank your favorite characters, least favorite characters, and those who are just kinda alright. What do you rank the characters as? Reblog this post so I can see how y'all rank the characters!

LEGO Elves Character Ranking

If you'd like to see why I ranked the characters the way I did, explanations are below the cut.

The way I ranked the characters considers 3 things: Story, characterization, and personal enjoyment.

S-Tier: I'm clearly biased, but Ragana and Cronan are incredibly fun villains in their respective story arcs! Ragana is clearly the favorite child of the producers since we saw her pop up in subsequent seasons, and she was fun each time we saw her. She was a decent first villain for the squad to face, and the format of the webisodes allowed us to see her be more goofy and genuine with Dusti and Jynx while in private.

Cronan's story is by far the most impactful, taking advantage of the darker tones the series was pushing towards. While still a fun villain in the webisodes, I enjoy SoE Cronan more for how the series better matched his character with the weight of the story, making him act like an unapologetic villain for most of the runtime.

A-Tier: Azari was one of the first elves we meet when entering Elvendale. Her energy is delightful to see, and juxtaposed with her selectiveness about where to direct that energy, Azari is an entertaining character to see on screen.

Farran suffers from the "token boy" treatment throughout the series, but still manages to have a contrasting character from the girls, being the sensible homebody type. He's almost the mom friend. If only he wasn't relegated to comedic relief all the time.

Aira is like Azari in her energy, but puts her all into everything all the time. She's a brilliant engineer without falling into the stereotypical "nerd" or "smart kid" elements that are tempting to tack onto her character role.

Cory may be a surprise to most, but in her short time on screen she made a big impact on me. She almost reminds me of a cynical veteran who can't quite move on from the old days, but that's getting into speculation. Her dynamic with Naida in their dedicated episode was the most memorable of the elf/guardian interactions.

B-Tier: These are the characters I feel like would have been in higher tiers had they been given just a little bit more.

Emily and Naida can be described as kind and caring, but there's little else to go off of from canon information. We get a touch more from the two chapter books, but again, not much. Emily suffers from this more than Naida does since we learn almost nothing else about her from introduction to finale.

Skyra my beloved, how I love a cranky lady with a soft spot... For the screen time she has, Skyra leaves a bold impression as a stern and powerful woman. But we don't have enough time with her to get much information about other facets of her character, like how she cares for her family, her intelligence, or the small similarities she has with Emily that are only mentioned in a website BIO.

Tidus and Rosalyn are the supporting cast in their respective seasons. Tidus is a gifted dragon trainer who can literally speak to dragons. Rosalyn is a swift huntress and potion master keeping her forest alive by a thread from the shadows. I want a little more from them, be it conflict, inter-character dynamic, or even just extra traits that compliment what we have now.

C-Tier: These are characters I believe had strong ideas behind them, but those ideas were never realized.

Sira introduced an interesting idea about elves not clicking with their given magic, loosely tying into Ragana's story of not being great with her own magic. She's like a mix of Aira and Azari with her interest in machines and blasé attitude.

Sophie is just the annoying little sibling archetype, but I appreciate the angle of her bringing out a new side to Emily (and forcing the writers to let us know a little more about Emily's life away from Elvendale).

Quartzine. The inciting incident. While her lust for power and karmic destruction for it is interesting, her (lack of) connection to characters aside from Cronan makes her more of a plot device than a character...

Noctura is the big finale bad of the series. The root of all evil in Elvendale. But we never know why or how she got banished to begin with. She and Lumia were friends after all. I love her as a villain idea, but the brevity of the final season didn't do anyone any favors.

Liska and Cyclo are decent foils to their respective elves. Liska doesn't pay any mind to trouble while Farran is uptight trying to find solutions. Cyclo is a quiet thinker while Aira is a noisy do-er. The latter managed to wrap up the duo's bonding in a nice meet-in-the-middle solution, but the former has sparked controversy in the fandom for the annihilation of Farran's character. In the end, the elves had to meet the guardians where they were at, the guardians had zero learning curves of their own.

D-Tier: Go girl, give us nothing! While I don't dislike these characters, they're pretty much blank slates as far as canon information is concerned.

Johnny is well-loved in the fandom just for being a sweetie pie. Granted, that's all anyone has to go off of. He gets multiple appearances throughout the show, but these appearances are only gags or goofs instead of character time.

Lumia has more character in her single paragraph website BIO than in the show proper, and even then only a single sentence gives us any information about how she is as a character. It's clear she's an important figure who works in the background to keep Elvendale in balance, she was essential in actually defeating Noctura, and she may or may not have history with the five sisters?

Rowan gives us a whole lot of nothing. There is vague reference to the first Narnia book/movie in his dynamic with Noctura, but we get no insight into his character or how he and Azari interact with each other whatsoever.

[inchidentally]

replying to asks abt the Drama today so pls skip if you're fully over that salfgjlagf (and bl 'tricky asks' to not see me respond to stuff like this - but I always put under a cut as well!)

oh my god this is a whole epic jfc and I'm p sure I repeat myself a lot I'm sorry <3

and for anyone who sees the walls of text below and is like pls tl;dr it for me bitch: today is one of multiple examples proving that Lando and Oscar are exceptionally able to maintain perspective and genuine consideration of each other given their situations and their ages. and that while they, like all teammates, will have ups and downs that they are FAR from the kinds of teammates to ever let the bad times linger or fester. I'm not going to be participating in flipping out or overreacting to it when it does inevitably happen but that it hasn’t even happened today! so I just don’t see a point in projecting the rare examples of melodramatic teammates onto Lando and Oscar as teammates. esp today when they both could quite easily have sniped at each other a bit even indirectly and yet they didn't! Lando at the team? absolutely! but like for anyone feeling sad or upset in terms of the landoscar of it all, I'm genuinely baffled ?? bc I'm personally out here impressed yet again at how well they've handled this ?? so yea <3

just to say, if you're someone who truly loves the Epic Highs and Lows of Formula One then good on you and continue having fun! some people live for The Drama and obv I'm not addressing or criticizing that at all!

but since I'm out here being regularly openly insane about landoscar and I've gotten these asks and seen people feeling upset, I def feel like it’s fair that I bring reality and reason into my posts as well being stupid akfgsalfg

so I've grown up with F1 passively in the background of my life (as in on the main TV in my house) and I'm still mostly a fake, but I've picked up some things over the years and one of them is that the average set of teammates aren't the melodrama ones. most teammates who enjoy genuine competitive closeness on the track just tick each other off sometimes but mostly like each other and hang out a bit - overall the average dynamic ranges from mildly indifferent to good buddies. 

(brocedes and sebmark are outliers for a reason. and they did NOT just turn bad overnight. that toxic soup was brewing from the very start. but more about that later in this gigantic ass essay)

so once I realized last season that Lando and Oscar genuinely like each other and weren't gonna pop off over everything, my assumption has always been that they would have their tiffs and snipe to the press or avoid each other for periods but then get over it and go back to liking each other again - rinse and repeat! from a driver’s pov it's way more enjoyable and preferable to NOT be fighting w the guy you spend so much time and share a car with.

but !! that didn't happen and hasn't happened! with Lando and Oscar it very quickly went beyond just passively okay w each other - they've made active choices to show respect and fairness and consideration that for me has truly been exceptional.

and while I'm insane about them for narratives and rpf, the not insane part is how these two fit together so beautifully? like, Lando knows and says how his feelings and his brain can just take over sometimes and he struggles - that includes his feelings of anger and resentment. Oscar's primary trait is being calm and being able to be circumspect even under stress. Lando's actually said that he's learned from Oscar remaining calm. then you've got Oscar's 'hearteyes' and genuine admiration of Lando that shows up not in loud PR ways* but in quiet respect and standing back for Lando to shine and giving Lando his full dues. over time, Lando's come to 'hearteyes' right back bc of the respect and ngl genuine affection he feels for Oscar's fairness and respectfulness and his persistence in showing up and being happy for Lando no matter what. like, none of that requires embellishment and it's said by pretty much everyone including each other!

so to me, that means that when they do inevitably have 'moments' at the front of the pack together in future they'll ofc be grumpy w each other or resentful but it'll all be okay once they've cooled off. 

but !! that was not today !! my entire day of reblogging is just a nonstop bam bam bam of them looking out for each other in the face of this drama and taking care to not feed the media who have been dying for them to hate each other since day one. Oscar apologizing and if anything being less celebratory today than he was in Monaco for his second place. keeping the post race short and simple** and not going over the top celebrating after the team photo. Lando repeating in his post races that Oscar deserved the win and that he didn't want the issues with team orders to overshadow that and literally reaching out to Oscar to say 'we're okay' right out of the car <3

so yea in the years they are teammates they will definitely have their off days and probably that'll happen at certain points this season - but genuinely ! it should not be taken for granted how mature and considerate and kind they've remained w each other since basically Austria last year ! that counts for a hell of a lot in terms of not assuming they're "over" every time team strategy screws one or both of them, or that they will become different people and suddenly cultivate melodrama.

and sure, anything can happen etc etc but I don’t see a point in just aimlessly waiting for the absolute worst to happen unless you actively want them to hate each other which seems like a huge waste of time but to each their own ldgfjlagfljsfg

guys… things like "why didn't he spray Oscar with champagne first" and "they had a moment where they weren't smiling" or "the cool down room was awkward" "Oscar didn't thank Lando like Lando did in Miami" “Oscar hasn’t liked such and such on instagram” is not only pointless self-torturing it's also all pretty easy to debunk by someone like me who follows a lot of teams and drivers and sees a ton of different sides to these things every weekend:

- as for the comment likes, Oscar hasn't liked everyone's comments that he should have - I did a quick pass and the standouts are he still hasn’t liked the comment from opeightyone (his own brand company!), still hadn't liked the Australian GP comment last time I checked, or Kym Ilman, literally a fellow Aussie who he talks to at every single race and who left a heartfelt comment. we need to give this poor guy a break and not ignore how much he was laughing and smiling with Lando just bc he’s struggling with the alerts on his phone !! (and as always, we have absolutely no way of knowing anymore when we can say how much the driver is doing vs what their sm team is doing. I saw in a story the other day that Lily had stopped doing her usual emoji replies to his posts for a while (she started up again after quali this weekend) and clearly there's been no issues between them so it's safe to say Oscar's sm officially isn't the true measure of his current relationships!)

- Lando and Oscar were already joking and smiling together before the champagne! so why would Lando then get mad and show it by not spraying him first? (EDIT: as an anon pointed out, when Lando runs over to the McLaren team member Oscar is laughing and follows him! so the plan was to drown the poor guy all along lol.) Lando and Lewis have a special bond from long before Oscar and Lewis and McLaren have had a bond even longer. if I hadn't seen ppl be upset about this I wouldn't have thought twice about Lando running to Lewis after having spend the first half the podium chatting to Oscar!

and just a quick side note, Lando had NO problem showing how mad he was before Oscar came into the cool down room when he threw down that hat and got huffy with Lewis when all Lewis did was say how fast the McLaren is! but every time Lando interacted with Oscar, he made sure to keep it together and be happy for him bc as he strenuously made clear in his interviews, his upset was at the team's directions but he didn't want it overshadowing Oscar's well-earned win. so if anything, view Lando rushing over to Lewis as an apology for somewhat biting his head off over a compliment lfgjflgsalf

- the drivers are exhausted and their default mode after a race is to be not smiling, like not even Lando smiled the entire time following his win. add to today that Lando hasn't been happy with second place for a long time and Oscar isn't an effusive guy and it's weird to think they'd be laughing and smiling nonstop.

- cool down rooms are literally always awkward ?? the drivers hate that there are cameras and conversation is always stilted. it’s where they go to … y'know, cool down, not get hyped lol

- Lando thanked Oscar in Miami bc Oscar showed what the car could do w his overtakes, guys. it was VERY sweet but it wasn't like 'thank you for my life Oscar' or even 'thank you for my win'. but even apart from that, Lando has fully taken on the rightful 'I'm the more established F1 star and the face of McLaren and it's my job to let the new guy know when he's done well' even back before he and Oscar had much of a relationship. but… and I’m about to spin off on this topic now… Lando does very well with this sometimes yes, but remember that the majority of his own feeds are also solely focused on himself like Oscar's and like most driver's are! and that he and Oscar both forget to like McLaren's content most of the time!

but also like……….

please let us please remember Oscar has the same rights to putting himself first as every other driver !! he may be remarkably mature and respectful to Lando and McLaren and exceptionally able to get over being set aside or even screwed over, but he's not a worm!

as far as questioning if him not 'thanking' Lando somehow negates his literally non-stop hearteyes-so-blatant-that-casuals-comment-on-it that he has for Lando every single week... guys.. Lily. like I'm positive he'll make a special post or story with her soon but he only said a quick "hi" to Lily after Ted brought her up and then did a generic thank you to everyone LIKE ?? the guy isn't even effusive about his beloved long time gf !! his love language is not in words* !!

but I also feel the need to bring smth up here bc there is a definite lean happening in some quarters of fandom into fully expecting and taking for granted Oscar's patience and maturity and ability to be happy for Lando no matter how much he's hurting or upset for himself. and I've got to raise everyone who says that the fact that Oscar is allowed to be like every other driver including Lando! he is allowed to feel frustrated or not be a perfect saint! in the earlier part of last year, Lando openly said he was uncomfortable being 'the older guy' and he frequently left Oscar in the lurch not knowing where to go or ignored Oscar to talk to or about his previous teammates. when Oscar hadn't been told the correct time for that major meeting shown in DTS, Lando was not hiding feeling fairly smug after Oscar said "is Lando already here?" and in Australia this year, Lando fully forgot to have anything to do with Oscar in what was literally Oscar’s home town and home country race to the point ! that in the podium drivers conference when a reporter brought up if Oscar was bummed about missing out on a podium, Lando stiffly said that he guessed anyone would want a podium on their home race - but he was far from sympathetic!

now before anyone thinks this is me having a go at Lando, I am not. I'm literally reminding the people who are reading too much into Oscar not saying thank you specifically to Lando in what was a much shorter and less exuberant overall race win celebration and post race video than Lando’s win was: it is not a big deal !! it is not some huge thing that Lando would even notice and that Lando has frequently chosen to not include or show gratitude to Oscar at times when we expected him to and !! it's fine because it really is fine !! 

but when Oscar is seen to not cover every single base of gratitude and inclusion for Lando, for some fans it's A Problem or A Worry. and for some people, a broader thank you to the team and not specifically to Lando** is reason why Lando should despise Oscar forever and even consider leaving McLaren like the comments sections are insaaaane bro

these are two Normal Guys who are each living their Own Careers and while it's wonderful to enjoy the things that bond them and are special about them, they are still going to be Normal! and they will not view these tiny insignificant moments where they didn’t fully acknowledge the other with any magnitude at all! they are not expecting a level of devotion to each other that certain fans are! Oscar didn’t notice or care that Lando didn’t make anything special out of his home race and their pre-race fan stage was funny and sweet! Lando didn’t notice or even assume that Oscar should thank him specifically for team orders when Lando himself didn’t thank Oscar for team orders!

like I just cannot emphasize enough the importance of separating fun rpf narratives from reality. Lando tried to mess up Carlos’ parking job before the race as a joke to get back at him over the sign the day before - and then Carlos very firmly said that Lando absolutely should have given Oscar his place back and he even commented on one of Oscar’s posts despite not following him. this does not mean Carlos and Lando are beefing or that Carlos is being mean by going out of his way for Oscar! will I run with that single comment for carcar fodder absolutely - but that is fiction! nobody's mad at anybody!

and then there's the things that don't exist in Formula 1: "Oscar shouldn't have accepted the orders" "McLaren are out to get Lando" "Lando already gets too much hate"

- Oscar apologized for his pace and complications and he gave a very subdued little speech over the radio which was very big of him (and very wrong of McLaren to put him in that position) but if someone thinks any driver including Lando would even slightly imply "nah give the win to my teammate not me" then they’re categorically living on another plane of stan-ism that I can't comprehend. Lando literally said multiple times after this race how he has been the one to benefit from strategy working in his favor - both by McLaren and other teams. he's many many times made a cheeky face or made a joke when he's gotten away with something that fans of a rival driver or team were rightfully furious about. and if a person thinks it was mean when some ppl criticized the role that serendipity played in Miami then maybe that same person shouldn't start biting chunks out of Oscar about the same thing idk !!

Lando repeatedly said how much Oscar has done for him and if his Oscar-hating stans choose to think he's wrong or lying then idk !! he's being mature and fair so like, live n learn from your idol !

and can I just echo everyone saying 'please stop comparing this to brocedes or sebmark' or honestly even charlos? I'm doing bullet lists apparently so I'll do another one lafgljsafgsa

- brocedes is entirely due to their complicated and abnormally intimate lifelong history together leading up to F1. they were already Not Normal Friends and that made for the tinderbox that was their F1 careers together. literally they were destined to have to rupture that level of intimacy if they weren't going to just like get married to each other. they always needed to turn that relationship into something milder and less intense and it would always have exploded no matter what adult lives they had. F1 just made the explosion more violent and public. there’s truly no comparing them with anyone else.

- Oscar bears no resemblance to Mark and Lando bears no resemblance to Seb. Seb as he was in his heyday was... not shy or bashful about being a madman. sebmark never once looked like landoscar and it wasn't this huge revelation that that relationship would end up where it did !!

- Charles and Carlos have a negligible career/experience gap compared to Lando and Oscar and their temperaments are as much primed for friction as Lando and Oscar's are complimentary to each other. not to like 'they're so continental!' charlos but like, their already passionate natures got thrown into a rolling boil of Italian heritage racing and it's why the whole love/hate being sides of the same coin thing always happens with them. their families are even houses alike in dignity etc etc. it's Pure Drama and Intensity and always has been, both good and bad. they’re as terrible at using PR to smooth things over as landoscar are at not even bothering with PR. when Charles and Carlos are good together they’re passionately all over each other and when they’re mad at each other it’s messy and all over the press like a warring celebrity couple. Lando and Oscar are still delicately pawing at their relationship to know what it is and they still shyly touch as if seeking permission. Lando and Oscar are so not PR friendly that even Netflix gave up on them as a narrative entirely. Charles and Carlos are Shakespeare. Lando and Oscar are Jane Austen. Ferrari is the Capulet/Montague pride before the fall. McLaren is Mrs. Bennett trying to social climb using her daughters as bait.

as someone who follows blogs for multiple diff teams and drivers, trust me I see a lot of "my opinion of him is gone forever after this!!!" about something their own fave driver did even just a few races ago and absolutely will do again. same with "the team is destroying him and favoring his teammate!" like I straight up will see that said by each teammate's fanbase of the same team about the same race. this happens at different times throughout the season in every single team I follow - it even happened w Williams of all teams (tho so far that's just the once).

I'm a fake so obv I'm not going to weigh in myself but my cousins and their friends who watch F1 on the app at my house - and who aren't represented ethnically by any driver or team so they don't have bias - always have a much more calm and nuanced take. they assume every driver is out for themselves and by that very fact alone, teams have to take sides when the gap closes. and !! that millionaires doing an elite sport aren't experiencing mental distress over this sport the way common people experience distress over real life !! they go and bury their "woes" in extravagant luxury and an entire army of hugely biased family, supporters and fanbases all of whom think said driver deserves everything.

and that it takes truly heinous betrayal or outright evil to make these guys hate each other with any serious level of depth bc they all know they're The Selfish Asshole just as easily as the other guy. 

so I personally trust their takes on things and it's probably why I've always assumed Lando and Oscar would be Normal and have their little tiffs like everyone else does. bc it's rule one of making it to this level of the sport that you have to think selfishly. straight up I'm astounded at how quickly they've both been able to shake that 'visors down' mentality that Andrea referenced in the post race video and see the bigger picture and not be The Asshole to each other. 

and overall I don’t mind my dash being a warzone of wild accusations immediately after a race bc everyone usually calms down.

but there are certain things I just do not want on my dash and it's actually not related to what driver a person hates or not....

because while it's silly to see any of these privileged little princes as A Victim and Would Never Do That To Their Teammate (which would honestly get you laughed at by said driver) it's pretty common biased fan behavior. even tho Lando literally kept reminding people that Oscar's swallowed his own pride over things for Lando's benefit many times and that he (Lando) has been on the receiving end of podiums that came from strategies working in his favor (McLaren’s and that of other teams).

and like the idea that Oscar is now some heinous human being bc he's behaving like every other driver including Lando by Lando's own admission is hysterical. the idea that F1 teams are ever in any way benevolent kindly forces or that F1 drivers have anything akin to 'selflessness' over race wins is hysterical.

but where I draw a line is stanning for men in this sport so hard to the point of insane amounts of agonized doomposting and biased venomous rage. sorry but most of us don't want our precious time wasted agonizing over which self-confessed selfish millionaire in a sport founded on and maintained by pure elitism is feeling So Bad and So Sad! that he runs off to be comforted by a beautiful woman/women and adoring family and coddling hangers-on and legions of worshiping, wholly biased fans and millions of dollars on gigantic yachts because the absurdly unnecessary sport he gets to do isn't "looking after him well enough" or "prioritizing his happiness" !!!!?????? 

like fuck I'm a callous bitch ig but I'm not feeling an ounce of genuine upset whenever one of these men experiences a level of "my sport makes me sad". "oh but it's all they've known !! it's all relative !! money and privilege don’t equal happiness and privileged men suffer too !!" oh stfu no it doesn't and no they're not like stockholm syndrom victims and if they're so unhappy then they can put on their big boy boots and take their money and go fucking do something else holy SHITTTTT 

am I not here for allowing any portion of my human empathy to go to a fuuucCKING F1 driver jeeeeeeesusss. all of these men fully have the potential to get metoo’d or exposed about smth bc they're all capable of doing awful things by the time they're in F2 -male pro athletes are NOT objectively safe spaces to hang human morality or to assign automatic grace and good intent - let alone bleed pain or feel sadness for their race results or issues with their teams.

there is no acceptable moral relativity for me and these men and this sport are only of interest to me as a hyperfixation that gives me enjoyment in the form of narratives and a very specific, surface degree of enjoyment.

it’s fine if Lando or Oscar feel their feelings of frustration or anger etc but no way in hell am I going to feel remotely sad for them ??? they’re fine ?? there are genuinely sad things in my life and in the world and millionaires wanting trophies and points isn’t among them !! I’m not entwining my day-to-day happiness in any way with what they get up to and I’ll take what I can enjoy from them and ignore everything else.

and to wrap up this epic which I’m only indulging in bc I do feel like my blog sometimes seems like I’m pushing my own silly narratives on others and genuinely I’m not intending to - most of the reason I actually got drawn to landoscar and wanted to engage in fandom about them is precisely because their real life non-rpf dynamic is so unusually mature and considerate and not toxic or like, at all even overtly masculine. yea I originally got drawn into f1blr for the usual bromance rpf types like carland0 and dand0 etc but I didn’t rly care enough to engage in any way. 

but I think this is why I know that the ppl wanting Lando and Oscar to become this insane toxic mess are going to keep raging with disappointment - kind of like how I knew Lando and Max would be perfect again after just a few days while so many ppl hoped it was the start of some battle royale to last years that would end their close friendship. and why I knew Logan and Alex would end up with a genuine, heartfelt friendship when so many ppl assumed Alex would see Logan as one foot out the door and just wait to bond with a more worthy teammate. now we’ve got Alex saying how he and Lily casually talk about Logan for no reason at all and their friendship surviving Alex being given Logan’s car <3

I genuinely don’t bullshit myself into enjoying dynamics unless they feel real - so whatever friction I ever sense between Lando and Oscar as a result of them pushing each other to be the best they can be and helping to bring McLaren from the back of the field to WCC contender, isn’t at odds with them being gentle and unusually private and earnestly aware of each other. bromances were always Lando’s PR insurance with his other two teammates - a nice bandaid to cover moments where cracks showed or Lando didn’t hide his emotions enough. it’s something a lot of teammates use for the same purpose. but Lando and Oscar deciding to forgo that and have their little privacy door to shut out everyone else but each other from their drivers rooms, and how they will be doing interviews and then get distracted talking to each other over things that only interest them, and traveling and hanging out together without giving McLaren PR any material to use… like that’s a lovely, tender little unpretentious narrative to enjoy. watching them tiptoe so cautiously around an almighty cockup on McLaren’s pitwall side and Lando trying to pull himself up out of murky defeat for Oscar and Oscar deciding to celebrate so modestly because what a mess that ending was for them both. 

like I just don’t see a need for trying to invent ways to be unhappy or miserable or fabricate a doomed anything when they’re both still so sweet <3 <3 (and honestly it’s the same old tune of McLaren’s strategy needing a swift smack around the head)

tysm babe and I hope this one helped as well <3<3

[yuseirra]

A comparison: What’s Up with Death Note Musical's Lyrics? KR(JP) VS English

It's quite different in tone!

To shift the mood from what I usually talk about- I thought it'd be fun to discuss about some of the songs I like from the Death Note musical I mentioned before! I've been listening to them quite a bit and they're enjoyable to listen to.

Out of all the songs I’ve heard from the Korean version(since I understand the language), my favorite is “The Unchanging/Unwavering Truth.” (I also listen to “ Ready to Love(I'm Ready)” and “Death Note(Hurricane)” quite a lot.)

From the English version, the songs I listen to the most are Playing His Game, Where Is the Justice?, and Hurricane. The lyrics are just so interesting.

It’s fascinating how even though there’s some overlap between the Korean and English versions, the songs that stand out for me do differ(they're all good ofc)—and sometimes, the tone of the lyrics is completely different.

Personally, I found the lyrics of the English version of Hurricane to be full of bold, passionate energy—really entertaining. The English version’s Light gives the impression that he’s been waiting for the Death Note all along. He doesn’t hesitate. As soon as he gets it, he’s like, “Wow… with this, I can finally do everything I’ve always wanted!” He comes off a bit unhinged, in a compelling way.

This may have to do with the U.S. being a country that allows gun ownership. Maybe the emphasis on self-defense or the constant awareness of danger plays a role. There are lyrics in several songs that compare the notebook to a gun. Phrases like “Writing is the gun, and I only have to aim” or “He’s not killing people with knives or guns...” That comparison doesn't exist in the respective KR/JP versions. The focus seems to be on how Light now has access to a method that’s easier and leaves fewer traces than conventional weapons, than the act of being able to murder someone in the first place.

Unlike a knife, which has other uses, a gun is inherently made to kill. And if something like that were to be released into the world… I feel like the impact it could have on people’s minds would be significant.

The English version of Light really shows this mindset (a mix of idealism and madness) clearly—especially in the first song, Where Is the Justice? He doesn’t really seem to struggle with doubts like “Is it okay for me to do this?” Rather, he already knows what he wants to do. He throws challenging questions at teachers who speak from a rational, rule-of-law perspective. He asks, “Should the world really be like this? Where is the justice?” expressing his own dissatisfaction with the state of the world.

So the moment he picks up the notebook, he’s not shocked like, “Oh no… did I just kill someone?”(this happens in the respective JP/KR counterparts of this song. In fact, that version is about Light's Dillemma and resolve and overcoming his doubts of killing people as the means to serve his ideals. Super interesting, isn't it?)—he seems more euphoric. It’s like, “Wait right there, criminals! I’m going to take you all down. I’m the hurricane!”

In a way, this does seem to somewhat align with how Light was portrayed in the original manga. As I recall, the manga didn’t focus much on Light’s inner turmoil over the act of killing itself. It was more like, “Sure, I’ve killed a lot of people. But it was a necessary evil. The world is full of people we don’t need, and I’m simply cleaning things up. Crime rate has dropped over 70%, hasn’t it?”

That’s how I remember it—though it’s been 3-4 years since I read it, so I may not be completely accurate. But I felt like he genuinely believed that. He had such strong conviction in his own sense of justice that he didn’t waver much. Even when he started killing the FBI agents chasing him, he didn’t seem to feel particularly troubled about it.

If Light had been the kind of person who constantly wrestled with his own justification, the whole vibe would’ve been different.

Anyway, I’ll leave that there for now.

As for The Unchanging/Unwavering Truth—my impression is that the Korean actor who played L added a lot of his own interpretation to the role. The mood is very different from the sample version.

I’m not sure, but I think the Japanese version followed the atmosphere of the sample more closely (though I haven’t listened to it in detail). I’ve seen comparison clips.

In the sample version, unlike the powerful Korean performance, the tone is much more subdued. I’ll bring in the songs to show what I mean.

And for the Korean version… among the ones on YouTube, this is my favorite:

I love it because it’s so powerful!

I haven’t seen the musical live—I’ve only listened to some of the songs, so I might be off—but from the lyrics, it seems like this song comes after L deduces, through deduction, that a supernatural entity like a Shinigami must actually exist. So he accepts that truth and decides to move forward with it.

In terms of direction, I think the Korean and English versions of this song express things differently.

In the Korean version, L seems just as bold and principled as Light—maybe even more so. His stance is basically: “I’m the one who’s right. You’re just a hypocrite and a murderer." (This is present in The Game Begins.) Almost like Inspector Javert. There’s conviction, a sense of personal justice that stands against Light’s, and a battle of wills that’s more important than even their lives. It’s a high-stakes, head-to-head clash. (And really, that’s probably the kind of resolve it would take to stand against a mass murderer.)

I think the Korean actor’s interpretation plays a big part in this. I find reinterpretations like this to be a great fit for the musical medium, and dramatically engaging. Plus, the acting and singing are top-notch—it’d be so fun to watch. The original L is also quite stubborn, so this take feels like a compelling angle—it suits him.

The English version of L, on the other hand, feels more like a classic detective. From what I’ve heard in the songs, he has strong principles, but it comes through differently—sharper, more precise. The Korean version is more emotionally intense, while the English version feels like a scholar or researcher who’s digging deep.

So the vibe of the song is a bit like… a scholar who’s spent his whole life believing in one thing, only to discover evidence of something that completely contradicts it.

Like: “Whoa… is this truly the truth? It’s so different from what I’ve always believed… but if it is the truth, then as a seeker of knowledge, I have to accept it and uphold it—because that’s what truth demands.”

That’s the kind of image I get.

Kind of like an astronomer discovering a previously unseen star, or a scientist uncovering a new law of nature.

If I had to sum it up:

The Korean version’s L is Light’s rival and arch-nemesis. He’s basically saying, “I’ll stop you no matter what it takes!”

The English version’s L feels more like a detective who, while working a case, comes across Light and thinks, “Hmm… this one’s a bit strange.” Then gradually realizes, “Wait, this is something much bigger.” He becomes more serious about it.

This L does want to uncover Light’s truth, but more than that, it feels like Light is just one of many mysteries he’s dealt with in his line of work. He’d probably give this much attention to any major case. It just hasn’t been this complex before.

So he approaches Light as a “problem to solve,” but not someone who shakes him to his core. (I can be wrong because I haven't heard all the songs nor have watched the musical as a whole, this is just what I get from this particular song alone)

The Korean L won’t budge either, of course—but there, it feels like Light and L’s battle goes all the way to a personal, human level. Each becomes the other’s focus.

In the English version, both Light and L are so self-contained in their respective worldviews that their goals are more objective. They don’t dive deeply into each other’s emotional or inner world to the extent that they get so affected by it. Their main drive isn’t “defeating the other and proving I’m right,” but more like, “I’m going to stay true to my path (become the hurricane / uncover the truth).”

You can feel this even in the lyrics of Playing His Game.

Both versions explore the other intensely—but in the English version, it’s like gathering data and analyzing objective details to figure out what the other is thinking: What do they like to eat? Where do they go? Do they dream? What will they do next?

In contrast, the Korean (and maybe Japanese) versions have more abstract lyrics—things like “You’re all I see,” “burning up,” “entangled,” “we’re the only ones in this world…”—so it feels more emotionally charged.

There’s more personal emotion in how they approach each other. More subjective assessments, more provocations.

Which version is more accurate to the manga? I'd have to reread it, both are convincing and intriguing takes!

It’s really interesting how these subtle differences pop up—maybe it’s a cultural thing, like a contrast in emotional sensibilities between the East and the West? Even in terms of goals, the English version focuses on "me winning," while the Korean/Japanese version shifts the spotlight to "I’ll cut off your breath," putting the emphasis squarely on the opponent. It’s like they’ve become deeply significant presences to each other—“That person has become my goal. I need to figure out how to defeat them.”

Now, finally circling back to the song, "Unwavering Truth" and its lyrics-

In the English version, the song "Unwavering Truth" has the title, “The Way Things Are.”

I think you can interpret this title as, “The Way the World Works” or “The Truth of How the World Turns” might work well. It's subtly...different. And it makes sense, let me discuss about it a little more.

Interestingly, the line "The Way Things Are" actually appears in the English lyrics of "Where is the Justice?"—the first song that plays when Light makes his debut:

What about the victims

Waiting for some justice?

How can we turn away and say

That’s just the way things are?

This shows that Light’s definition of justice begins with resisting “the way the world works.”

As if to say, “Who cares about how things are ‘supposed’ to be—there are people suffering right now, right here!”

On the other hand, in L’s song, he says:

The cold, hard truth

Can’t lock it out

You can’t change it

True or false, no

Shadow of a doubt

Can’t rearrange it

The cold, hard truth

Is my north star

So I know I’ll live and I’ll die

The way things are.

So L is basically saying the opposite—“I will live within the boundaries of this truth, of the way the world is.”

They both use the phrase "the way things are," but the contexts are completely different.

For Light, the phrase represents something to rage against.

For L, it’s the unshakable truth that guides his path—a light by which he lives and eventually dies.

It's such an intriguing opposition, right?

Maybe it's also meant to emphasize that the two are destined for a conflict where only one can survive.

I don’t think this kind of nuance exists in the Japanese or Korean versions.

Since the English lyrics are the original, the lyricist probably embedded devices like contrasts and mirrored phrases deliberately.

In a way, Light comes across as “the one who wants to destroy the system,” (and “Hurricane” definitely fits that image), while L feels more like “the guardian of truth.”

Their portrayals are similar to the original, yet also subtly different.

I remember Light being someone very structured—he tries to create and enforce a system.

Meanwhile, L feels more unconventional—less bound by norms, willing to get what he needs by bending the rules.

But ironically, Light’s the one who ends up crossing society’s moral lines, whereas L usually doesn’t step beyond a certain minimum threshold.

Their character construction is so well done.

Personally, as an idealist, I tend to believe that ideals aren’t things you achieve by settling into the current reality—they’re things you move toward by changing and evolving.

So even if I’m unsure in terms of real-world behavior, when it comes to philosophy, I’m usually drawn to the idea of “let’s change it for the better.”

Ironically enough, however, I did also root for L when I first read Death Note.

That's because the moment Light started killing investigators, it became clear that his justice wasn’t exactly just anymore.

Because I’m idealistic, I instinctively hit the brakes at that point—“This isn’t right.”

That said… even though Light obtained the power to kill anyone at will, he didn’t exactly use it for selfish personal gain.

He could have, but instead, he genuinely believed “I am the god of a new world.”

Now, I know that phrase sounds a little juvenile—and the fact that he gets so hung up on it might seem a bit cheesy—but ironically, that does make him more human.

He genuinely believed in his sense of justice.

I think he was pure in a way (even if his facial expressions do become more sinister as things go on).

But here’s the thing—someone who never doubts their own beliefs is dangerous, regardless of whether they’re good or evil.

He was given immense power, and I can’t help but think that if he hadn’t picked up the notebook, he might’ve lived as a model citizen with a strong sense of justice.

There was a bit of disillusionment with the world, and then, in the middle of an incomplete adolescence, he picked up the notebook—and that, combined with his brilliant mind, created a really bad synergy.

Light is… well, pure, in a sense.

Rather than “good” or “evil,” it’s his conviction that’s the real issue.

When it comes to justice, I do think it’s okay to be firm in your convictions.

But his were so strong, so absolute, and they directly translated into action.

And that’s probably why the story was so compelling—because Light acted without hesitation.

Death Note has the potential to go really deep philosophically or ideologically, but the story intentionally avoids diving in too hard.

Instead, it focuses on the psychological chess match between two geniuses, which makes it easier to enjoy without being overwhelmed.

I was always watching with curiosity, thinking, “What are those two going to try next?”

Earlier I mentioned that English-version L felt a bit like a scholar.

There’s one particularly striking song of his—was it “The Game Begins”?—where he sings about analyzing numbers, data, and graphs.

Maybe it’s because of the way the actor sang it, but the lyrics just stuck with me… haha.

Those lines were probably kept almost exactly from the English lyrics.

And really, in psychology and sociology, data is crucial.

You gather information, build a statistical foundation—big data, essentially—and that becomes your starting point.

It reminded me of that, and I really liked it.

Well, that's my analysis on these songs! I'd like to reread this manga again sometime too, I remember it having been quite good!

[brandoncarlo]

Well February happened and it sucked but I kept reading! And I actually enjoyed most of it. This month ruined my run of just hit after hit but I guess eventually I was gonna read some stinkers. If anything it's just made me excited for March though as I have a bunch of certified bangers lined up for me. Also yes I just stacked my february books on top of my january books. I want to see how tall it gets before I have to think of another way to store them.

As with last time, more thorough reviews under the cut, ranked from worst to best.

4. Everyone on This Train is a Suspect by Benjamin Stevenson 2.5 ★'s

I don't want to turn anyone off of this Author because the first ever book I read by him was amazing. It was suspenseful, thrilling, and hilarious. This was the sequel and it just fell flat. I finished it if only because I trusted the Author to write a satisfying ending. And you know what, it was okay, it was fine. It wasn't terrible. But it also was not worth my time reading. The first book in this series is called Everyone in my Family Has Killed Someone and it is amazing. Maybe I would have liked this book better if it wasn't in direct comparison to that one. It's about an author who gets invited to a crime authors convention on a train. Then someone dies. and all these crime authors do their best Poirot impression. It was genuinely funny it just lacked a lot of charm. One good thing I will say though is this encouraged me to pick up the next book.

3. Murder on The Orient Express by Agatha Christie 4 ★'s

Yes the rest of these books were much more enjoyable than the last one so I'm glad I got them all crammed in. I picked this one up on a whim, as I'm not one that usually really likes classics but this one was lot of fun. I already knew the twist going in, but I was interested to see how it would be set up. My favorite part of this book is how it respects your time. It does not linger on ANYTHING. It is straight up, it tells you what it means, and then it moves on. There are a few times where the narrator just goes "That's not possible," and you know that it isn't. No one lies to you for the purpose of the twist later. It always works. Now is it a bit goofy? Yes. Is it realistic? No. Is it definitely a book from the 1930's? Yes. But it is charming, entertaining, and worth the read. As a side note I watched the 2017 movie after I read this and while I see that they had to add some stuff to make it more exciting because honestly the book is a bit dry, some of the changes they made were ridiculous. I can understand a good gun fight, but one of the main pieces of evidence they change makes the ending literally not possible. So yeah not a good movie, but honestly, still fun.

2. These Violent Delights by Micah Nemerever 5 ★'s

I struggle to suggest this book to anyone but I think Tumblr is the place to do it. This book left me feeling so incredibly uncomfortable I originally gave it 4 stars and then was hypnotized by the impact it left on me for days afterwards and it became a 5 star read. The two main characters in this book are some of the worst people I've read books about and STILL the ways I could relate to them shook me. I spent the entire book not trusting a word the love interest said, not believing him for one moment. Then got to the end and really realized that I was seeing everything through the narrators view and that he was just as capable of lying to me as the love interest was. This is a gay romance, but it is not cozy, it is not cute, it is not sweet. It is obsessive and repressive and violent. I loved it so much. I personally love books about unhinged messed up gays so it was right up my wheel house.

The Will of The Many by James Islington 5 ★'s

Umm this book is so good? What the fuck. This is a roman empire inspired fantasy (but the kind of fantasy where they use their magic to create technology so it also feels very sci-fi in parts). This book was just pure entertainment. I heard some say it was slow in the beginning and I guess so? But the world is just so fucking interesting I did not slow down at all. The core of it is kind of basic, but the magic system and the world is so good. Add in that every character whether good or bad has ulterior motives and how you can really feel just how isolated the main character is, just chef's kiss. Now is the message of it super deep? Is it pure art? No but god it's so fun and I'm obsessed with it. I just want the whole series injected directly into my veins and the second book isn't even out yet. I had so much fun with this book I added another one to my TBR just because I heard someone describe it as a mix of another book and this one. Like hell yeah I'll read any book like this. It has action, wholesome friendships, political intrigue, grief, trauma, hope, horror, violence, humor. Everything. Is it the best at all time at any of them? No but it's all there and they're all good. And I know everyone says this in every review of this book but that ending??? WHAT?

[shoppncart]

Shopping Cart's Best Games of 2024

as in games i played during 2024 not just games that came out in 2024. Given that I've started logging a lot more of my media experiences this year, games primarily, I thought it'd be fun to rank those which I enjoyed the most and give a little more thoughts and recommendations on them. I prioritized games I first played this year, or ones I played for the first time in a while. I skipped over some great games because of this, like Portal 2 and Kirby Super Star Ultra, but those still are really good too! So, if you want some gaming rec's based on what I played this year, give a read.

10 - Little Nightmares

Little Nightmares was easily able to wriggle its way into my favorites thanks to its style alone, with solid, simple 3D Platformer-feeling mechanics to support it to boot. Though the game is extremely linear and quite short, each part of it is very well designed and fleshed out with various props and hidden details. It was fun getting to use each part of the limited moveset together, as well as comb little side areas for secrets. In all honesty it could probably be ranked higher but I played it so late and haven't even gotten to the side story yet so that doesn't feel quite fair.

9 - Kirby's Adventure

Kirby is always one to provide a very solid, enjoyable experience, but special credit has to be given to his NES outing, which is so good that it’s likely the best game on the console. Kirby’s Adventure is such a colorful, varied and well-composed treat, featuring quite of a bit of content between its long level list, plethora of Copy Abilities to play with, and numerous level secrets. It’s really impressive comparing it to its nearest relative, Super Mario Bros. 3, which in my opinion it blows out of the water. It’s rife with charm and personality too, with all of its little animations and bonuses, special example going to the iconic Drawing Song seen every time on boot-up.

Kirby’s Adventure ain’t perfect granted, it’s doing so much on the NES that it is prone to slowdown quite a bit, and has a tendency to drop inputs, and has the older Kirby quirk of knocking your Ability out of Kirby every time he gets hit, especially irritating in levels where you need to carry an ability to solve a puzzle late in the stage. The 3DS Classics revision fixes a lot of the technical issues at least, so that’s one of the preferred ways to play it. Not sure if the SP version on Switch Online does that too but, I know it exists.

8 - Pokemon Crystal Legacy

I’ve always had a soft spot for the second generation of Pokemon, I think it’s got a really charming style and has a ton of impressive features for a dinky little Gameboy RPG, but always had a hard time coming back to it due to how limited or poorly planned out some things in it felt. I mean, half the new Pokemon either aren’t available for a majority of the game or are just plain unusable, and that makes the whole appeal of Pokemon (at least in my opinion), using a varied team and trying out new ‘mons on repeat playthroughs, a real struggle.

Crystal Legacy, meanwhile, is an excellent Quality of Life romhack that does a whole laundry list of things to improve the experience. It overhauls a bunch of encounter tables, adding Pokemon where they previously didn’t appear or adjusting percentages so rare encounters weren’t hair-pullingly uncommon. It adjusts a bunch of Base Stat Totals and movepools, making underpowered Pokemon more evenly capable. It even readjusted several of the enemy trainers to provide more of a steady challenge and throw a curveball for veterans like myself, surprising me and making me face roadblocks with a little more thought than before.

I was really impressed by everything Crystal Legacy changed with the base game, and would highly recommend it as the definitive way to replay Gen 2 Pokemon if you’re ever interested in going back to it.

7 - Half-Life

Clear to see why this one's a classic and a big landmark for First-Person Shooters, the first half of the game leaves an extremely strong impression and even today all of its little events and cinematics are entertaining and impressive to see. As someone not super savvy with FPS games it probably had even more of an impact, and felt pretty welcoming with how the difficulty and scale of enemies gently rose throughout the game. Stuff like the introduction of the soldiers with their squad tactics was quite the challenge early one while also being a big surprise compared to the usual alien mooks of the super-early game.

Unfortunately I didn't enjoy myself as much as the game progressed, with the later game levels (Surface Tension being a prime example in my mind) lacking that sort of entertaining factor the early segments had and primarily focusing on empty areas with little NPC interaction and frequent sources of damage. Being followed and barraged by a helicopter was not the best experience in this game. Surprisingly I didn't hate Xen as much as its reputation would imply, I kinda liked getting to use the Long Jump ability in low-grav environments. The Nihilanth was a dreadful final boss though I'll agree on that.

Overall it was pretty solid though and I can easily see why it's as highly regarded as it is. Eager to get to Half-Life 2 one day.

6 - Pizza Tower: The Noise Update

Pizza Tower was already a phenomenal game with incredibly creative gameplay, visuals, and music, and the Noise Update just goes ahead and adds a whole extra layer of wacky goodness on top of it. The Noise’s controls and mechanics are just similar enough to Peppino to not feel unwelcome while still offering a bunch of new ideas and possibilities to make things feel fresh, it’s really absurd what you can end up doing with the Noise sometimes and the speed you can accrue in parts where Peppino had to take it slower.

Not even to mention all the various little aesthetic differences where the Noise differs from Peppino, such as the various transformations (many of which have slightly different properties with the Noise compared to the base game), the new escape and handful of level music, and even a couple changes to some boss fights. It overall might not be as comprehensive of a new character campaign as something like Shovel Knight had, but it’s still a plethora of welcome changes that make the best game of 2023 even better.

5 - Team Fortress 2

I’ve always been a big fan of TF2, but haven’t really played it that frequently in recent years, not helped by the rampant bot crisis that had been afflicting the game in years prior. However, this year, Valve finally stepped up, wiped away almost all of the bots, and allowed TF2 to finally flourish as a chaotic and fun team shooter once again. It’s definitely my most played game of the year, and ate up a lot of my time in October during its annual Scream Fortress event. Valve didn’t even push a major content update or anything, but getting to experience the game without cheaters and with friends again really helped breathe life into it, and now I can’t help myself from coming back every couple days and continuing to fight in its many maps, and trying out new tricks and ideas I keep coming up with.

Solider and Engineer are my classic go-to’s, but I found myself having a lot of fun with Demoman and Scout this year, and really feeling my aim starting to improve, if still in small increments. I’m finally getting a concept of how to airblast and hit flare guns properly with Pyro, have found out that Heavy’s pretty fun to fall back on if the team’s got other roles filled, and pick up the role of team Medic quite a bit. There’s just so much to the game that it still hasn’t felt like it’s gotten stale, even after about six straight months of consistent playing this year.

4 - Psychopomp GOLD

This one came out of nowhere but I was really happy to get to experience it. Psychopomp GOLD reminds me of various other PS1-styled horror games like Lost in Vivo, and comes with a thick layer of character too. Some environments may be the typical dark, grungy hallways you’d expect, but others are colorfully lit and intricately designed in really appealing ways, not to mention the various weird creatures and monsters you meet that just have pleasant rambling conversations with you. It helps to paint a better picture of the main character when you realize this is the type of thing she’s dealing with and still treats without much surprise.

Exploring each of these environments and the weird things in them makes up most of the game’s charm, as well as making it further into this broken, twisted world and putting together the clues of what other horrible things might happen. It’s even got a few effective actual scares at points, despite mostly focusing its horror on tension throughout.

The game’s pretty light on story on the surface though, and its authentically-classic PS1 movement (ie. grid-based tank controls), both of which are sure to turn some people off. I’d say it’s still worth giving a shot, and the free original version of the game is still available, featuring the game’s first three, more grounded and realistically-styled levels. GOLD is quite the treat and comes with a bunch more bonus content to really flesh out the setting, so I do recommend it.

3 - Anthology of the Killer

Anthology of the Killer was a game I didn’t expect to like nearly as much as I did, but I was had a really good time with it and enjoyed nearly everything it put me through. For what’s effectively just a walking simulator-visual novel sort of combo, Anthology of the Killer provides a large handful of entertaining comedic-horror stories with a very charming style, referring to both its writing and visuals. The writing leans pretty heavily on the comedy half most of the time, but never quite loses its horror half, with its absurd aesthetics, low-lit environments, and strange sound design never letting the unease fully dissipate.

It really felt like going through some weird funhouse attraction and I enjoyed seeing every character go through their little plots and escapades. It was a very fun ride and I’d highly recommend at least trying out some of the individual episodes, available for free on GameJolt. The Anthology has its own pluses and it’s great experiencing them all back-to-back, I think.

2 - The Big Catch: Tacklebox

An incredibly impressive experience for what is basically a free demo for an upcoming project. There’s so much to do, and its open-ended format is really cool and helps add to the length by not funneling you through linear levels. Everything presentation-wise is superb, with fantastic sixth console generation visuals and excellent music. The basic controls and gameplay are especially tight and fluid too. I gotta give special mention to the propeller flowers that you can grapple onto and launch yourself in their direction, then immediately grapple back onto and rubber band yourself in the opposite direction with even more force. Several of the game’s challenges focusing on these more slick element were where the game shone its strongest.

There are some moments where the game wants you to be more precise that don’t work quite as well as it feels like it should (the massive temple area that you spend a long time climbing to the top of felt pretty unforgiving at times, though had frequent shortcuts to make up for it at least). The controls were a little strange to get used to as well, such as the specific ways to use the fishing rod or mechanics like wall running-to-jump combo, but most of the game was forgiving enough that it never got too irritating.

If you’re a 3D Platformer fan or nut for slick movement-focused platformers I highly recommend at least trying it out for a couple hours, and keeping and eye out for the full game’s release sometime in 2025.

1 - Corn Kidz 64

This one was such a pleasant surprise to me. I had heard a few scattered words of praise for Corn Kidz, but once I finally got to playing it myself I found a game that combined so many elements that appealed to me personally that I didn’t even think someone else would ever make a game like this. If only it had a grungy aquatic level then it would be truly perfect…

Corn Kidz 64 is a 3D Platformer taking clear cues from fifth gen consoles in both visual and gameplay styles, with its major inspirations seeming to draw from Banjo-Kazooie and Spyro the Dragon. It also has a delightful late 90s-early 2000s gothic-Hot Topic aesthetic that warms my heart even more. I didn’t even know I wanted a Banjo-Kazooie spiritual successor to look like Invader Zim fanart but Corn Kidz delivered alright. The music is super on-point too, not sounding like Kirkhope’s stuff but other synthy and grungy tunes of the era. The character animations are pretty fluid and appealing as well, using what looks like a lot of vertex-based stuff you'd see in Spyro or Crash Bandicoot.

The gameplay itself follows the usual collectathon form, with a couple densely packed levels to explore for goodies and secrets, with an agile moveset focused on climbing and wall-jumping to really boost that feeling to scouring over every surface to find collectibles. Granted, the actual gameplay is where I’ve seen Corn Kidz fall apart for some people, and I can see why, there’s no double-jump or mid-air recovery tool, which is pretty unheard of for 3D platformers (the air dash you are provided is very situational and sometimes required for platforming challenges, so isn’t usable as a recovery tool). There’s no Totals page to keep track of all your collectibles, irritating for potential completionists, and there are a few moments in the level design that can lead to repeated backtracking (the church and graveyard segments of Wolloh’s Hollow is a large example that even caught me up in my first playthrough).

While these flaws can be pretty irksome, I was able to look past them by how appealing the game was in every other aspect, and was able to find a comfortable understanding of the gameplay not long after starting. The final challenges of the game are pretty brutal, especially the long and checkpoint-free bonus level, but using everything the game had taught me in a tightly packed back-to-back gauntlet had its charms. Even better, Corn Kidz 64 emulated the weird and mysterious vibes of Banjo-Kazooie’s most hidden secrets with its Void Screw collectibles. These are bonus collectibles hidden in extremely obscure spots used to unlock totally hidden rewards tucked away in what feels like an unused area of the game, complete with access to (what is presumably) the game's Dev Test Room. It so well captures the feeling that chasing Stop n Swop secrets had back and in the day and I was so happy to see a developer accurately recapture that feeling, with the bonus that there were secrets even beyond that that took months for anybody online to even find.

Corn Kidz 64 is the best game I played this year, almost entirely for biased, nostalgia-pandering reasons. I’m fully aware of the flaws it’s got (which can really turn off some people, I understand), and am always going to be just a smidgen disappointed with it (it’s only got TWO major areas…), but goddamn. It sure as hell does what it’s aiming to do really well. It’s a grungy gothic late 90s 3D platformer successor and that’s a really easy way to get into my heart.

[speedierthanasubmarine]

I decided to watch helluva boss and imma do 2 separate posts for seasons 1 and two (why did I write it like that…?)

Season one

God I love this show. The writing is way more my speed than Hazbin hotel on Amazon, I enjoyed the writing in the pilot, but once Amazon took over the humor just didn’t really land for me, and tbh the plot took over and I started focusing more on that, and in general I’m more partial to the rapid fire YouTube dry comedy and this sentence is a friggin mess- I found HB SO FREAKIN FUNNY

Dude when he goes “FUCK, a new hole” I lost it

“Just try and sue us”

“We’re rich and we’re hot”

“I can just buy all the things!”

“You should commit die”

“Hehe, Trumpet!”

These are just my kinda lines, I don’t know how to explain it, I was wheezing all throughout the season

The music OH LORD when I say I’ve listened to stolas’s lullabye, lulu land, cotton candy, and house of ozmodius like 100000 times I’m… exaggerating but like you get the point the music here is friggin fantastic I also really like how a lot of the music is diegetic, I think that’s a fun touch. I don’t remember whether this is the case in Hazbin, but in this one it was like… I don’t know, it made sense that they were singing when they were singing… am I articulating myself well? I don’t care, iykyk if not, no prob

The animation is great, Viv loves them spinny shots and I am here for it. The amount of genuinely amazing action scenes is super impressive, and even the chill scenes have a ton of personality

The voice acting might be what steals the show for me, idrk anyone’s names cept Alex Brightman but BLITZS VA NEEDS AN AWARD, also slight tangent but I don’t know what it is with stolas’s va but he sounds a lot like a bird in the same sense that Gary Oldman sounded a lot like a bird in Kung Fu Panda 2, what is it that casting directors recognize in actors that screams bird?! Because both of these men are just SO BIRD DOES ANYONE GET WHAT I MEAN moving on, Ozzie’s voice was also effing PERFECT it slid silkily over me like… silk butter or smtg it was the perfect lust voice, I loved it. Everyone else was also great, but they were extra great.

It was also just so fun? Like in hazbin there’s very little just… shenanigans to enjoy, nothing wrong with that because it’s not that type of show, whereas this season is jam packed with them. Like I’ve heard that everyone hated episode 4, but like I don’t know I loved it😆 I just found it to be good old fashioned chicanery, and I liked the chaos and stupidity of it, made for some entertaining TV. This story engine is just mad entertaining for me.

I also enjoyed the writing of most of the characters (Millie, Moxxie, Loona, and Octavia still leave a bit to be desired imo, but whatever, they can’t all be winners and there’s nothing wrong with them) Blitz kinda reminds me of a Barney Stinson type character, which I really enjoy, and I also really like how his boss persona kinda infects everything he does while simultaneously being what’s screwing him over, his nature is kinda like a snake swallowing its own tail, which is tragic and beautiful, and Stolas compliments him well by being, not an enabler, but… I don’t know a clever way to say this… Stolas is a wreck in the best way and he just works. He’s short sighted, like extremely so, like how he thinks sleeping with Blitz will fill his emotional void so he does it but it just drives them further apart so it’s like he’s in a hole and in order to get out he’s gonna dig to pile up dirt so he can climb out but he’s an idiot and that’s a stupid idea and I loved his whole arc. Very enjoyable stuff drama.

Kinda random but whoever Viv’s foli artist is also deserves an award, the sound effects in this show are pristine and it’s incredible (yes I’ve seen the scene where the gun sounds go off a few seconds too late, and yeah, mistakes happen, but every bone crunch sounds and other stuff like that being so enunciated in an indie show is extremely impressive)

Anyhoo, very fun, very emotional, nice to look at, very funny, yada yada- altogether great season 1.

[tuhhadkeryo]

Two rant posts in one day?

Anyways.

Hacker’s tiny legs.

I believe I am the sole person who does not enjoy this aspect…but let me tell you why.

Hacker’s legs are first mentioned in a flash episode. We all know how seriously I take flash *cough* sarcasm *cough*. What I believe the writers did in whatever season that was (I believe Team Spirit is the first mention) - was mess up the mix between cartoon and reality.

To me, the first few seasons give the impression of a lot of exaggeration to help kids immediately identify a character’s chief traits. Hacker is egotistical and threatening - therefore they give him a massive chest, large chin, and smaller legs to exaggerate the chest. Make it look even bigger than it actually is. We see this in other strong characters like Deci and Zeus.

In the beginning seasons, Hacker does not have difficulty keeping up with the other characters, for example: Eye of Rom, A Whale of a Tale, etc.

He is shown to run just as fast as Buzz or Delete in these instances.

In one episode specifically, it’s hinted that we see Hacker’s footprints!

As we can see, the footprints are large.

In the episode about human proportions, the writers purposely avoided using any borg people to avoid giving anyone a set size. Even when the earth kid’s proportions are seen in a more detailed way, they are different sizes than what is animated usually.

I think these things - Hacker’s footprints, the kids’ footprints, other similar stereotypically ‘strong’ male characters, not being shown to be slow in other scenes - all point to that little bit of cartoon exaggeration. Meaning in reality, of course Hacker’s an adult with adult sized shoes.

But flash did the same thing with others! From the model that flash used for the earth kids without sweaters, their wrists are wayyyyy too skinny. Their hands are too big. The whole thing is just awkward. Not to mention Hacker’s hands are smaller than Jackie’s in A Perfect Score!

But if Hacker has tiny legs like that, then that means the same logic should be applied to the rest of the world. So Matt, Jackie, and Inez are all terrifying looking in real life.

I feel like it’s another instance of the animators/writers/whomever forgetting the rules of the universe and something made for a cheap laugh. I’m not tryna be all like ‘oH hAcKeR CAn dO EVerYThINg’ but dammit let the man walk!

Of course we all know I like to make everything ‘realistic’ or whatever. And there are probably plenty of counter points but the cheapness of flash comedy in the later seasons gets me sometimes and I refuse to enjoy >:0 (unless one of my mutuals does it it’s okay then. Don’t worry I separate these thoughts from my enjoyment of other fan media!!!)

It is kinda a zany show and I get that it’s in a different universe where all is not applied the same way as with earth physics. So I try to compromise by drawing him bowlegged or with slightly shorter legs than average. And obviously I still exaggerate some features.

(I hc that he actually can’t run very fast because of a knee injury in college playing football or smt.)

Just agh. It sucks seeing something pathetic come out of nowhere about your favorite character.

Anyways don’t worry if you like him with teeny legs I’m just never really going to draw him with them lol.

[wolfex126]

Max from Sam and Max for the character ask meme

Max for this ask meme!

I'm gonna be so honest I got DEEP in the paint here and I'm writing this after having finished answering everything - and. Yuh this need a cut LMFAO so the answers are under the read more! Ain't wanna clog your page without warning - and my most sincere of apologies in advance for yappin as much as I did but. What can I say. Special interest fun.

I have to thank you regardless for having me think about these, because this was super enjoyable!! Plus I find any opportunity to pour my heart out really cathartic ☁️🩷

How I feel about this character

LOVE im. Love im to bits it's quite incredible actually LMAO. As with both parts of that pair they're stronger characters put together, but I think Max has way more nuanced personality as an individual than people tend to think about him!! In Sam's bio in the original Save the World, it states they've known each other all their lives and "speak a common language" - and I think that fact, about specifically Max, goes to show he's more detailed than it appears :] More than their hijinks and playful taunting, they do speak a common language: and it's supporting the other how they need case-by-case 🥺

I don't know, I always appreciated how Max was a deeper character than was outwardly demonstrated most of the time. At the end of TDPH, the moment where Max is recalling what happened in his timeline with nonchalant humor in the face of pretty horrific circumstances (whether used to cope or not), but then sees Sam visibly disconcerted, and Max immediately changes how he approaches the conversation with more tact, is beautifully subtle in showing Max is capable and willing to be gentler with Sam when their usual joking doesn't work.

Maybe it was or was not intentional, and I'm reading way too much into it, but long story short Max is a wonderfully comedic, yet nuanced character, and even as more of a Sam fan (by a mere margin, mind you), I would be remiss to deny that the pair are interwoven pretty inseparably - and Max being any other way wouldn't make their dynamic work nearly as perfectly. Good rabbity thing character 10/10

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Sammy Hound Dog is my only ship for him 🐶🐰I couldn't imagine those two being with anybody else. "In every life, I will find you," type beat y'know?

My non-romantic OTP for this character

Does Flint Paper count LMAO? I think they'd be rather close (whenever they have free time between cases really JWBFKSN) and I'd imagine Max still has a bit of an idol thing going on even post Night of the Living Dead :]

Maybe a cheating answer but truthfully my gut answer was Sybil!! She's the pair's bestie imo so sure maybe obvious person to say but all the same I think she and Max could be a hell of a lot closer than it appears (⁠´⁠∩⁠｡⁠•⁠ ⁠ᵕ⁠ ⁠•⁠｡⁠∩⁠`⁠) I think she'd be a deeply trusted confidant, and he thinks to go to her first concerning things he couldn't ask Sam about/for - not that that'd be. Very much. Considering the little to no filter he's got But for dates or to surprise Sam with something and he knows he's gonna need help with it she's his first thought. Though I'm sure the end of TDPH probably went to show how much deeper Max cared for Sybil than what showed on the surface 🥹🩷

My unpopular opinion about this character

PG opinion? Now I am The Number One, Uno, Un, Ein, Énas, Yek crossdressing fan wholly and truly I've never known myself without that passion But I would probably say as far as the content I see, I'm way surprised that Max is the most chosen of the two to do so!! Immediate disclaimer bc one will always be Grateful to be fed and the work is always SUPER delightful regardless but just from what I hear in dialogue and have seen in the cartoon I was always under the impression Sam was more willing and even eager to crossdress, while Max was pretty hesitant and/or did not do so very often :0 At the end of the day this is a huge nothing-offense but it's more something I found interesting in the fandom! Clothes aren't gendered just in case I have to say that but I'm quite fond of the term and the history so it's just how I call it :]

Adult opinion? Max prefers to top and Sam prefers Max tops too. Sure they'll switch off on occasion but I think after that dog does all the work and talkin all day there's a dynamic shift (⁠◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍⁠)👍🏼 That's all I've got for now I would further elaborate with great love but being that I'm not sure how you feel about this sort of thing I'll leave it out of courtesy!! But it was an honest gut answer I had so I didn't want to leave it from my rambling

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon

That he gives Sam a big ol kiss right on that snout of his and then rehashes that line about his warmth being alarming

If I can't answer that then I'm also cool with a peek into their actual bedroom!! I was always under the impression they lived right in the office, but I've also seen iterations from other fans of them having a house or an apartment!! Regardless of depiction, I think having a concrete bedroom visual for them would be super interesting (⁠☆⁠▽⁠☆⁠) Though it is fun as fans to be able to speculate and show off our own ideas, so it isn't upsetting or anything of that sort - just something I think could realistically be done!

Sincerely I don't have any specific wishes for Max specifically - I think he was handled very well in all the media he's in, and anything that wasn't directly shown or written is very easily remediable with fanon and community ideas!! I don't find anything wrong with the stories serving their purpose as is, and the people being left to interpret and add onto what exists 🩷

Though, if I can give a more dramatic answer to this, however unrealistic, then I'd say I wouldn't at all hate a musical motif for him (or all the main characters really!!) I understand that hardcore story-telling is not really a Sam and Max special, but if I can be self-indulgent and shamelessly passionate about music, then I'll say especially for a game like TDPH something during more emotional or intense moments including character musical motifs in the background a la God of War reboot style would make things a hell of a lot more impactful.

Like Max's motif could be something lively, something typically with drums and violin or harp, or even flute, and changes depending on the progression of the story - during his initial power sequence, it's powerful and upbeat and smooth; during his beast transformation, it's chaotic and defeaning and gritty; during Sam's departure from the lab after finding out they couldn't bring Max back, it's quiet and drawn out and almost sounds like a lullaby before Sam takes to the streets and the motif stops playing to transition into Sam's sole motif, which would be equally quiet and solemn, to imply Max being left behind and Sam left alone. Maybe Sam and Max while they're together also have a motif that's both of their individual ones combined - and when it matters most, their motifs can be separate like when Noir Sam happens or when Max is trapped in the ship.

There's a lot of potential in music being powerful for this series, and while I think the sound direction is good as is (I mean, "That Rainy Neon Glow" is a pretty damn good Noir Sam track), I think a little extra care to make motifs to consciously and subconsciously recognize themes would be tremendous. I mean shit maybe they're gonna do that for the upcoming remaster and I'll be taken aback but I'm more of the belief that this is something only in a wistful dream ☁️🩷

[fool-from-lamanchaland]

im bored outta my gourd so here's an extensive ranking of the sinners based on who i like most [with reasonings, serious and/or silly]

DISCLAIMER !!!! I like all of the sinners besides the one at the very bottom, this isn't a tierlist based on who i think are the best sinners but rather on who i Personally enjoy, don't take this to heart i know each of them has Their Reason™ to be your fave ok? ok thank

starting from the bottom,

12. meursault

meur fans im so sorry. i really am. i have tried so so hard to see his appeal. i just do not feel anything about him. i do not think about him unless I'm thinking about the sinners as a collective.

perhaps in his canto I'll see the meursault charm but for now i genuinely don't care about that man

11. faust

the faust hivemind................ she's entertaining

my favourite faust moments are her being prideful about her intelligence. her dropping the 'faust' as a first person pronoun from the sheer hater energy she had while one upping hohenheim in the lcb checkup was Absolutely amazing i love to see her being justifiably egotistical

besides that i don't have much to say on her i fear ...

although if she were ever to get an angela ID I'd actually start playing limbus. the power she holds. good lird

funnily enough faust is my girlfriend's favourite sinner [mostly via appearances], she's divorcing me for this take /j

10. sinclair

not sure how i feel about sinclair ill be fr

he and faust are about the exact same level of enjoyment, but due to my love of his dynamic with don and ryoshu he ended up a lil higher

The twink is splendid. i need to see him be violent more. yes i love the new middle id let him kick ass

i feel like out of all of the sinners with cantos out, his compelled me the least so unfortunately i just don't have much to say on the guy

9. outis

I've had personal beef with outis for the comments she made towards don/sancho during her canto sorry i need her gone /silly

in all seriousness this war vet perplexes me ....... two faced bootlicker woman that i need to analyse under a microscope/pos

i don't condone All of her wrongs [still fighting her for the don slander] but i do condone a lot of them. love seeing her be cunning and scheming lets go evil women !!!!

even if she's quite low on the tierlist pls understand i Want to like her more i need to know her goddamn problem. where is penelope. what does the broken watch symbolise. what about the odyssey. how will it end up being translated into the pjmverse. What Horrors Has She Been Through i gotta know man!!!!!

8. hong lu

placed him around the middle of the tierlist since i know he's just about to get some crazy lore drops in his canto, just in case so i can easily move him upwards/downwards

as of writing this post though, he's quite splendid and silly .......his 'uwah~!'s are Everything to me

aesthetically he's my favourite masc sinner i love gorgeous boys with long luscious hair and whimsy

i can tell his ass is hiding every damn bit of his personality and emotions to be as cordial and unsuspecting and inoffensive as possible, maybe a leftover tactic from the hell he lived through back at the jia household? i doubt his original name is even Hong lu

hong lu's absolutely nonexistent sense of self preservation has me incredibly concerned. how was he unphazed about having his time taken in TKT . this man. SHAKING HIM

7. Heathcliff

ayyy the H names back to back

looks around nervously. would i be burnt at the stake for saying through patches of violet is my least favourite canto bossfight song /SILLY

like sinclair, i just. dont have too much to say on him? doesn't mean i dislike him, he's a really interesting character, i know theyve got sm more to do with heathcliff's story and im pumped for that, especially since the way his canto ended wasn't all that great for me

his position here is very shaky tbh . i feel he'll get moved sooner or later

in all seriousness though, despite the initial impression he had he's one of the most loyal and pretty compassionate guys in that damn bus. id trust him with my drink And all my belongings at a bar id trust him with my Life. of this tierlist were for sinners I'd befriend he'd be num.1

6.ryoshu

The funniest sinner in the bus imo

as another enjoyer of the arts [although not. in the bloody way] she's so cool ... id offer myself up to become an artpiece of hers huh who said that

she doesn't stand for bullshit and is awesome as hell and also i need to know what her ties to the fingers are PLEASE

wish i had more to say but she's just super entertaining to me, so she's fairly up here

5. Rodion

she's so flawed and hasn't progressed much from her canto and i love her for it

"I'm alright" love no you are not. you've had the least character development from every other character with a canto you've still got to go through the fucking trenches you still have so much to work through

her pass on track is my second favourite behind don's... it sounds so much more off and Wrong and sad because she hasn't passed on!! your sins are still trailing behind you girl!!!! just look at how things played out in the TKT intervallo!!!!!!

4. yi sang

project moon devs i am out for your [metaphorical] blood. you guys did not need to make this man so relatable. why . sotp it pls

seeing him slowly become happier and find meaning to living despite his past mistakes makes me so emotional actually

he had the most impactful canto for me ........ there is hope ..... even when you've made mistakes and made things worse for yourself .... there'll always be hope for the future ........ dwelling on what could've been will just make you more miserable ............ something i needed to hear so badly

ok that's enough introspection . he makes me smile thats all

3. Gregor

my babygirl. ok moving on, /j

greg is generally not having the greatest time on the bus and feels like he has to endure being made the butt of the joke because it's what he deserves and slowly bur surely he's become more distant from the other sinners and is possibly metamorphosing more based on the LCB checkup [WHERE THEY LITERALLY MADE HIM THE OUTCAST BY NOT ADDING HIM TO THE LINEUP. EVIL] oghghhhh i need to see him break . let it be rodion who makes him snap PLEAASE.

also pablo 👍

2. Ishmael

fish lesbian

design wise she's my favourite fem sinner .. yes it's because of the orange . i am an extremely biased person

ohhgheghhhh her fury against ahab having taken away the person she loved most all in the name of some fuckass whale ............... slowly making her resemble the captain more and more as she spirals more and more into a crazed path of revenge ................... her adoration for queequeg showing in her longer hair when she never liked it just because queequeg did ........ and seeing her in pequod town being the only thing to calm her down................................ because queequeg was her reason to live before killing ahab was :[[[[[[[[

and her finally taking agency in her own life beyond her grudges by not killing ahab and finding a new purpose to go on, to look forward to what tomorrow awaits :[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[

im in fuckign shambles ishmael I'll always defend you girl

1. Don Quixote

character so good she overrode my life-long internal response of hearing 'don quixote' from "do do do donki donki ho–teeeeeee" to "BEEEACH VOLLEYBURR" /j

words alone cannot express what don quixote means to me.

every time i see her face i smile . every whimsical hijink of hers is instant serotonin . every don is perfect and beautiful and lovely . live laugh love don . her mere existence is a blessing actually one of the fictional characters of all time

her exaggerated pseudo-archaic form of speaking. the overly expressive and Intense emotions audible in her voice. compared to sancho's deep and methodical voice. her extreme sense of justice. the joy she brings to the bus which really needs it. her crazed adoration for fixers and fixer associations. her current moments where the persona slips and sancho shines through in mild embarrassment.

her being absolutely fuckign shattered after regaining her memories ......... feeling like she decieved the sinners and dante and simply cannot ever be with them due to how different their experiences are ........... until slowly but surely she realises that she Wants to be with them and they want to be with her, that they're her Family and she still wants to keep the dream she and her father had even when he had already long since given up ................. taking back the name and role of 'don Quixote, the fixer' after having initially reverted to sancho so the dream may live on ........... THE SINNERS ARE HER FAMILY :[[[[[[

PRE-MEMORY LOSS SANCHO ALSO MAKES ME INSANE BTW. she had nothing to live for and was content with dying in that fire until dadqui showed up, cursing her with a horrible disease that ended up actually being better than the meaningless life she had prior, content with just being with her father and her family and nothing else until bari showed up and sparked the smallest interest in fixers in her and a wildfire of interest for dad quixote and even if she found his next antics juvenile and foolish she still went along because sancho loved her father and even if she'd never admit it she was happy too all while she and dad quixote were blind to the suffering of dulcinea and her 3rd kindreds and all the other bloodfiends all for their father's dream until the FALL OF LAMANCHALAND WHERE SHE WAS FORCED TO LEAVE DAD QUIXOTE BEHIND AS THE SOLE MARTYR FOR THE BLOODFIENDS'S FESTERING ANGER OVER HAVING BEEN STARVED IN HIS LAMANCHALAND ENDEAVOR AND THE GRIEF BREAKING HER SO BADLY SHE DECIDES TO ERASE ALL OF HER MEMORIES FOREVER NO MATTER HOW MUCH THE PROCESS SCARES HER AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUAUGHGHHHHHHHH

AND THEN AFTER EVERY BLOODFIEND OF HER BLOODLINE BUT HER DIES SHE'S CURSED WITH THE COLLECTIVE THIRST FOR BLOOD OF COUNTLESS GENERATIONS...... FORCING THE TITLE OF 'MOTHER' ON HER ......... WHEN SHE'D NEVER WANTED TO HAVE ANY DESCENDANTS EVEN BEFORE LAMANCHALAND ................... SLAMS MY HEAD AGAINST THE FUCKIGN WALL. IM SICK. IM ILL. . GOD IF YOU CAN HEAR ME ,

HEROOOO ON A PLASTIC HORSE FIGHTING LIKE IT'S REAL WITH A CARBOARD SWOOOOOORD /lyr

don quixote . ogh.

ok thats all thank you

scatters

[tearlessrain]

13, 14 and 17 for the OC meme thing (for my favourite boys so Khatte and Kalarros, but feel free to toss in others in too be i love em all uwu)

hello thank (ask meme)

I probably will continue the streak of answering for the SWTOR Gang at large because why not xD

13. If you met your OC, would the two of you get along?

Khatte — depends. because on the one hand his job is to get along with people and he is extremely skilled at it, at surface level he is the kind of person who's really easy/enjoyable to talk to and will make people he's with feel liked/listened to even if they're not socially adept themselves. so as far as superficial interaction, yeah he'd be super fun to hang out with. as far as actually getting to know him as a person though, I guess I have the advantage of knowing exactly why he is the way he is but then he'd also hate that about me and frankly I wouldn't be well equipped to deal with his bullshit. so best not.

Kalarros — yeah tbh would love to hang out with that guy. he can get kind of obnoxious and full of himself but I have a distinct ability to work with that and despite it he'd be really interesting to talk to.

Jial-ro — yes but who's to say if it would be by choice or because of the Force glamor

Valdrynn — absolutely, love that guy

Qohi — absolutely not, fuck that guy

14. How does your OC want to be seen by other characters?

Khatte — well, if he could push a button and turn human he would. but failing that, he absolutely Needs to be the best at what he does to make up for it. he goes out of his way to imitate human mannerisms and social cues to the point that other cathar find him a bit weird and uncanny to interact with, but his priority is seeming Normal to the Imperials he's spent most of his life dealing with and it's a source of constant insecurity for him. at the same time he's careful to give the impression of someone who isn't really trying at all, and beyond that how he wants to be perceived at a given time really depends on what his goal is or what he's trying to get from someone.

Kalarros — he's had it impressed on him from a young age that he's a representation of his family/bloodline and to act accordingly. so for a lot of his life his priority was for everyone to know that he's Sith nobility and to be feared/respected accordingly, but by the Alliance era that's fallen by the wayside to a degree. He knows that he's perceived by the Republic at large as a monster and kind of revels in it, but he's also determined to sort of be a source of stability in the chaos. he wants to be seen as absolutely safe to the people he loves and extremely unsafe to anyone who might pose a threat to them.

Jial-ro — he wants to be liked so so so so much. he is desperate to be liked. please like him.

Valdrynn — he would prefer not to be perceived at all and generally makes himself kind of unapproachable on purpose. he spent his time during the main storyline trying very hard to be perceived as a Proper Sith in spite of the fact that he never wanted to be a Sith and hated everything about it, but once he's Commander of the Alliance? fuck that, he ditched all the mannerisms he picked up in order to be respected in the Citadel including the affected Kaasi accent and if people don't like him this way they can go fuck themselves.

Qohi — he stands at parade rest in line at space Starbucks and posts space instagram reels about respecting our troops.

17. What is the worst thing you have put your OC through story-wise?

okay so this is a bit tricky because these are ocs but they're also debatably canon SWTOR characters. so I'm only answering for the main two because I don't have concrete answers for most of them lol.

Khatte — the worst thing I've personally put him through was when he hit rock bottom during the timeskip and was as close as he's ever gotten to actively suicidal. fortunately Lana found him before ImpInt did but he was pissed about it for a good while.

Kalarros — definitely the aftermath of Ziost. I know that's not technically something I put him through since it's a canon game event, but I did line him up to get hit as hard as possible emotionally. he loved the Emperor to the point that it blinded him to the reality of the situation, and even after Yavin he believed that he was on a mission to save the Emperor, not to stop him. he thought that something must be causing it all, and Ziost was the point where it hit him that this was the Emperor's intent all along and all his devotion had meant absolutely nothing. and on top of that most of the Empire turned on him because they believed, for obvious reasons, that he'd been a part of the Emperor's betrayal knowingly. basically the foundation of everything he rooted his self worth in crumbled out from under him and it was rough for a while.

[dragonmasterhiccup]

It took her an additional second to comprehend what he said, the warmth on her face steadily increasing once she did. But then, she was spun and Freya didn't have the proper words to speak as she laughed in delight before standing in front of him again. "You're the only one who can be that cheesy around me and get away with it, Hiccup ."

Raising her brows in a short moment of surprise, she eyed her boyfriend as if to make sure he wasn't joking. "Seriously? I highly doubt that but…thank you." She lightly nudged him with her elbow, joy evident on her features. "You're not so bad yourself, Dragon Master."

Glancing around the Great Hall, the maiden pursed her lips and firmly nodded. "Yup, my mom and dad probably won't be home till the next day…they like to stay here for the whole thing.."

-------------

His words made Freya smile despite the thoughts that plagued her mind, filled with affection for him while tilting her head. "Y'know…I wouldn't be shocked if Ayla does call you her brother someday. She treats you like it already, so..it's only a matter of time..!"

Sitting down as comfortably as she could in the chair she pulled up beside him, her mind wandered off into what exactly her little sister mentioned. It felt as if she were stepping into an unexpected pile of mud; it left her disconcerted and ruffled, something not so enjoyable. Hiccup's question shook her out of that state, briefly, and there was a faint awkwardness settled inside of her.

'Am I making things worse..?' She cleared her throat, fidgeting with her fingers while answering: "Uh…she's probably gonna be up early…especially since it's Snoggletog tomorrow. I would too, but…I'm not a big morning person, obviously.." Her statement reminded herself of what would be happening the next day. She nearly forgot due to the new situation which took over her thoughts - astoundingly so.

When he paused in his movements, so did Freya, her gaze hesitating to glance at him in that small duration. Was she appearing too frustrated all of a sudden? Was she doing something wrong? It was probably her fault for causing whatever atmosphere they were in now. About to voice her apologies, she halted as he continued to gently take the flowers out of her hair, startling her even more once he talked about the very subject she was contemplating.

'He..knew..?' Another feeling came, although she wasn't sure how to label it. Could it be named as relief? Affirmed? There also seemed to be a lingering guilt, but it wasn't vigorous. "…Am I that obvious..?" She quietly chuckled, attempting to enlighten the mood. "..I don't want to come across as…I don't know.."

Needing a few seconds to finish, her tone became more hushed, "I was under the impression that I shouldn't be acting this way…I mean, Ruffnut is our friend -- I just-" Out came an ambivalent sigh. "I…I guess I would prefer if she…didn't do those things..cause…" Her sentence trailed off, glimpsing at him to speak the unsaid words of: 'We're together now.'

As he came to sit next to her, Freya began to finally ease up a bit, letting herself be soothed under each careful touch to her hair he did to get the flowers off. His claims of not having a sister didn't sound as believable when he was dealing with every black strand of hers; it could've been considered perfect by how assiduous he handled it. "Well, you did such an amazing job with your steps and whatnot…better than me, even!"

Her eyes steadily ignited in a rising contentment, glad that the previous weight of what Ayla revealed was being lessened. She kept an unwavering gaze on the small flames within the fireplace, a reminiscent smile forming as her boyfriend got the remaining flowers out. "Wanna know something…? I actually remember seeing you dance more than once for these Snoggletog events..when we were younger."

Trying to suppress the chuckle that came, her voice showed evidence of delight, "You made it look more fun than intended, at least for me…and that was before…everything happened.." She didn't specify what the term 'everything' meant, predicting he'd get the hint she referenced when he discovered Toothless.

Her attention strayed to his face, memorizing all the details upon it as much as possible. This time, she didn't fully attempt to hide the fact she was staring. "..I've barely counted 16 freckles on your face…and I'm still not done." Pausing for a moment, she didn't fully comprehend if he was done dealing with her hair, becoming lost in the green tranquility that was his eyes.

Inching closer ever so slightly, Freya held a sincere gaze set upon him. "Hiccup, thank you for…for talking about it..the whole Ruffnut thing. I probably wouldn't have mentioned it if you hadn't…which wouldn't have ended well for me…for both of us, really.."

In that split minute, she hesitated to get closer again, parts of her mind still 'recovering' from having to constantly tell herself their relationship was fake. 'It's real now, it's not a facade anymore..' And yet, she silently questioned herself; was she truly able to freely do the things a 'normal' couple would with Hiccup? Could she reach out and hold his hand just because she felt like it? Could she hug him without restraint or fear of being pushed away?

Could she talk to him for a longer duration and not get him tired or annoyed? Could she be herself around him and not worry about what her father or anybody else might think? But then, it hit her. Of course. That's why they were in a genuine relationship now. He felt the same way towards her, making her giddy again.

Freya could do those things - she had the privilege of being by Hiccup's side. And she did not plan on letting that go to waste. So, with the accepted knowledge in mind, she closed what little distance remained between them and held his cheek in the palm of her hand, delicately kissing him. Moving the same hand, she softly brushed her fingers against the edges of his hair, temporarily making contact with the braids intertwined in the auburn locks.

Freya could be the one to do that.

Slowly pulling away, her eyes opened to land upon the two braids Ayla had done for him, sitting straighter in her spot as the familiar warmth clothed her once more. "…That was, uh…that was my way of thanking you…" Quickly, she added: "I-If you don't..uhm, if you aren't comfortable or are bothered by that option then just tell me.."

Clearing her throat, the future Chief's girlfriend timidly pointed at his hair while glancing towards the fireplace. "…Your, uhm… One of your braids is becoming loose.." Would she admit that wasn't entirely the case? No…but it could give her the opportunity to braid it herself for the first time.

Hearing that made him perk up a bit. "You really think so?" Grinning, he found himself looking forward to the day Ayla called him 'brother'.

Chuckling at her statement, he nodded in agreement. "That I remember..." The two times they'd been trapped overnight in that cave allowed him to see different sides of Freya he hadn't before.

He had to admit though, her grumpy morning persona was something he found endearing.

Taking out another yellow flower, he shook his head. "No, you've just been a little off since Ayla mentioned it, is all...that, and you forget, I know you pretty well now." Raising his brows, he asked, "What?"

Oh.

Agreeing with her, he pointed out, "It is perfectly normal to not want another woman touching your boyfriend, at least in the way she was. Frankly, I wouldn't be comfortable either if that Arvid fellow had succeeded in being your dance partner tonight. Ruffnut is our friend, maybe she just forgot we were together. As soon as I told her no, she did back off."

"Arvid, on the other hand, seems to not care that you're spoken for now." Bringing a hand to his chin, he pretended to be deep in thought. "Perhaps Toothless and I oughta teach him a lesson..."

Shrugging shyly, he waved a hand. "Nah, I just had a bit more practice, that's all. You'll outshine me next year for certain!"

Pulling out the final flower, he added it to the pile on the table. "Well, that's the last of them. I'll leave unraveling the braid to you, I think..."

At her question, he leaned in closer, curious as to what she'd say.

Cracking a smile, his gaze fell to the floor as he chuckled, looking back at her as he spoke, "Really? You remember that? Gods, I--I was all limbs then!" Running a hand through his hair, he laughed, "It was one of the few things I didn't mess up!"

He met her gaze for a moment before shyly looking away, realizing she was staring. "Sixteen? You haven't had much time to count then, have you?" Even he had no idea just how many freckles he had, just that it was a lot.

Looking back at her, he gave a small nod. "I...I had a feeling you wouldn't say anything. Things like this, if left unaddressed, they could cause bigger problems down the line. It's best to talk about them before they snowball into something so big, it can't be managed..." Shrugging slightly, he added, "And, like I said, it bothered me too."

Sensing some hesitation in her, he tilted his head curiously, wondering what she must be thinking about. The flowers may be out of her braid, but the red paint still gave her that ethereal look. He found himself staring at her, and the way her eyes reflected the firelight.

Hiccup didn't even register that she was getting closer until she'd kissed him, his eyes going wide for a moment before closing as he kissed her back. He could feel her fingers in his hair, but he didn't mind it. With Freya, he was comfortable. He knew she wouldn't press too far, and there was something about being with her that made him feel calm.

Pulling away, he blinked his eyes open, smiling warmly at his girlfriend.

Not comfortable? Shaking his head, he wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her back in for another kiss. "No," he said softly, "you, you can touch my hair anytime. With you, I'm comfortable. If anything comes up where I'm not, I'll tell you."

Reaching up to touch the braid, he asked, "It is?" Glancing over at her, he got an idea. "Would you, would you mind fixing it for me?"

[jjangwonie]

Sweet Lips (S)

MAIN MASTERLIST

𓂃⊹ ִֶָ pairings: non!idol jay x reader 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ genre: suggestive 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ wc: 1.2k 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ summary: Parties don't seem to be the interesting or new anymore, until your bestfriend and Sunghoon invite you to join this themed party, unknown to you that you might be met with an intriguing encounter. 𓂃⊹ ִֶָ warnings: Slightly suggestive, kissing, alcohol, intoxication, party-setting

jjangwonie note: I have been away from writing for so long, focusing on my personal life for a bit, but I really hope this is still enjoyable! A small thought that came to mind one day. I will try to bring out more stuff soon!!

It was supposed to be a night as the nights before.

Your friends telling you about another party of one of your classmates, basically knowing what type of party it is going to be depending on the person throwing it. You are obligated to say yes, otherwise they would tell you to not be such a "party pooper", as your best friend calls it. None of them seemed interesting to you, though.

Every time it was the same; Overplayed music, some couples in the corners eating each other's faces, some guys coming up to you to ask "Where are you from," who only want to get into your pants. Everything so predictable, everyone's faces all too recognizable and all you're left with is wasted nights of not even being wasted.

See this night, this night was a bit different though.

They told you it was a party of someone who was new at throwing parties. It was a mask-themed party.

"Hm. Sounds interesting I guess." you respond to your doe eyed friend, pleading for you to go. "Oh please y/n it sounds so fun!! Not everyone knows about this party, it's the first party of this person at our school." She wiggles her eyebrows.

"I heard it from Sunghoon and apparently you can only go if invited, but he said we can come too. And I already bought us pretty masks." she grins slyly at you and takes your hand in hers.

"Pleaseeee?" She asks you again.

Thinking about it, it does sound enticing. You haven't been to a themed party in a while, and it sounds like you might be able to have at least a pinch of fun tonight. You sigh and give in to your friend, who is basically cutting off the circulation to your hands.

"Fine. One condition though." She tilts her head at you, waiting for you to speak. "Come over to my house to help me with an outfit?"

"Aha! Got it. This is definitely it, goes very well with the white mask I got you." She immediately puts it in front of you to put it on.

"I don't know. Does the colour suit me?" She rolls her eyes on you and throws the piece of clothing on your head. "You look good in any colour y/n."

You are looking at yourself, putting the white lace mask around your eyes and fixing your hair framing it. You put on your favourite strawberry scented lipgloss to top it off.

"Look how stunning you look." Your friend sneaks up to you. "We definitely look different yeah." You grab your bag and jacket and you both head out the door to Sunghoon waiting for you both.

The two of you slip in the car and greet him, before you're off on the road.

"Do you know this person personally, Sunghoon?" You ask him while scrolling through spotify.

"Yeah I do. I have been hanging out with him for a while, although I don't think you know him. He isn't really the type to like throwing parties." You nod and go back to your scrolling.

You suddenly hear him yelp and you look back to him holding his shoulder. "Where is your mask?!" The girl in the back says. "It's in my bag okay chill!"

Laughing at them, you didn't notice that you've arrived at this big house, decorated by a few coloured lights and people in similar masks and attire as yourself. The three of you step out the car and slowly walk towards the entrance.

"Impressive that everybody kept up with the theme." You rummage through your bag to reapply your gloss, lips and throat feeling dry, ready to down some alcohol.

The music enters your ears and the familiar set-up fills your vision with people dancing in the middle and a kitchen filled with laughter and red cups. You and your friend haste to the drinks, all giggly. Sunghoon shakes his head and tries to find the host of the party to say he's arrived.

"You made it!" Sunghoon gets hugged by the shoulders by the dark haired boy. "Yeah. Seems like the party is going great." He replies, leaning towards his friend's ear.

"I am with two others, that was okay right?" Sunghoon makes sure again. His eyes following where the two of his friends are walking off to.

"Oh no problem. You already told me beforehand so it's fine. Who'd you come with?" He asks.

Sunghoon nods his head over to you and your friend now laughing with others, taking in shots. The boy looks over casually, but couldn't take his eyes off of you.

He raises his eyebrows, taking you in, something about your presence hitting him in a way that makes him want to know more about you. "That is your friend?" Him now leaning into Sunghoons ear.

His sharp eyes follow you and your friend beeline towards the crowd of dancing bodies. Sunghoon's voice seems to sound muttered, not paying attention to him anymore.

"Let's go to them, I'll introduce you."

The night continues in delight and hazy vision, as your friends seem to have disappeared to heaven knows where. You are all alone at the corner of this room, as he is closely by you, trapping you between him and the wall behind you.

Drawn together as if by an unseen thread, you found yourselves sharing whispered secrets and laughter that seemed to resonate on a frequency meant only for you. The world around you faded, leaving only the intensity of a connection that neither of you had anticipated.

"You smell like summer." Jay murmured, his words barely louder than the music that filled the room.

You smiled, a movement he felt rather than saw. "It's the lipgloss." He smiles and shifts between your eyes and your lips, looking for any hesitation, before leaning in and taking his lips into yours, ever so softly.

Their conversation drifted from dreams to desires, each phrase a brushstroke in a portrait of intimacy.

You tasted of strawberries, a sweet and vivid contrast to the dim, shadowed room. It was the lipgloss—a scent that would forever be etched in his memory.

The night spiraled on, and your closeness grew, a shared heat in the coolness of the masked revelry.

But the two of you calm to a halt as you feel a buzz from your purse. As you pick up, you hesitantly look up into the boy's eyes, past his mask.

"Seems like I have to take care of my friend, I think she raided your drinks too much." You reach back into your purse and touch up your lipgloss and check if you seem alright, and walk off.

"No. It's okay. Let me walk with you." His smile is sweet just like the lingering taste on his lips, and you both find your way towards the exit.

You're met with a whiny friend hanging over Sunghoon, who seems like he is tired of taking care of her. "y/nie..." She murmurs, before lots of hiccups are heard. Quickly, you rush towards the poor girl. "Okay, okay now. Let's get you home."

You look back and met eyes with the boy, his expression unreadable. As you go into the car, and Sunghoon throws a nod at Jay, you disappear into the night from his eyes. He goes back in and he realises he never asked your number, wondering if you'll ever talk to eachother again.

He thinks about how he will go to Sunghoon to pester him out of giving him your number, while he softly brushes his lips with his thumb, your lipgloss shining in the dark from them.

He can't keep you out of his mind, but how can he if your strawberry lips are engulfing his senses?

©jjangwonie