#nice to see so many of them together though!

[pigeon-butch]

Hi! So first off, it's always nice to see someone who loves house sparrows - they're so often ignored or underappreciated that it makes me really happy when someone likes them. That being said, grackles aren't evil for engaging in carnivory! They're omnivorous and going to eat other animals sometimes, just like us and plenty of other species (crows do this as well)! So do those sparrows, who are also omnivores and are probably pretty terrifying if you are some sort of bug and/or grub.

That's the thing about bird feeders, they invite wild animals in close proximity so you can see them but that also means you're going to see the predator/prey relationships within your local bird community. This can be really cool even if it is sad sometimes! Those grackles and sparrows are tied together - so are the sparrows and the bugs, the hawks that might prey on them, or terrestrial animals that take hatchlings or eggs from the nest. It's sad seeing animals die, but they all rely on each other to live.

Grackles and sparrows are both birds that I love dearly and are species that many people consider to be undesirable or pests. That's obviously unfair, as they're just animals living their lives! The two of them have also adapted very well to human presence which is definitely a part of things - a lot of people don't take well to animals that exist in the same space as them.

You clearly care about birds with how much you like the house sparrows. You might never like grackles and there's not much I can do about that! If anything though, I would just ask you to try and consider them as their own creatures, not just as the predator of your sparrows. People can be very cruel when they decide an animal's life isn't worth anything - take it from me, a huge fan of pigeons (unfortunately treated like the #1 enemy of cities everywhere). So many animals are lovely and important even if we don't value them very much!

[loveroffemmes]

Since ur on a bit of a writing streak can we get a adult Natalie w a younger reader 🤭 (not illegal younger though)

Bar Talk | Natalie Scatorccio x Fem! Reader

warnings: drinking, smoking

summary: one-shot of you meeting natalie in a bar and you two seeing where things go from there

“Aren’t you a little too young to be here?” 

“They let me in, so probably not.” 

The older woman laughed, low and sultry, “Can I buy you a drink?” 

“What kind of person would turn that down?” 

The older woman turned to the bartender, “Two beers.” She fished into the pocket of her ripped jeans and pulled out a wad of crumpled dollars, throwing them onto the table. The bartender came back with two bottles and she took them, standing up and sitting in the bar stool closest to me. 

She handed me one of the bottles and clinked ours together, “Cheers.” She said, tipping the drink back with ease. I followed suit, drinking much less than her, but still making a good enough effort, “I’m Natalie, by the way.” 

“(Y/n).” I smiled. 

“Are you new around here?”

“No, I’ve been living here for a bit now, what about you?”

“Just got back.” Natalie took another sip of her drink, “I grew up around here – it’s a nice place.” 

“Mhm,” I hummed in response, “I like it.” 

Natalie shifted in her seat, her hand hesitantly moving closer to me, “Why are you drinking alone?” Natalie audibly swallowed, clearly a bit nervous, “Not in a bad way, just curious.” 

“Honestly, I like the walk home. The night sky and the slight tipsiness, it’s kinda nice.” 

Natalie smiled, just barely, “Yeah, I get that, but that Jersey wind always sobers me up.” Natalie replied with a chuckle. 

“Oh, god, yes! I like the walks, but sometimes the wind is so strong that I always end up scolding myself for not bringing a jacket. So, Natalie, why are you here alone?”

Natalie’s hand reached for her bottle again, but she pulled back before it could make contact, “Sometimes I like to get away from it all and this helps.” Natalie sighed, her shoulders seeming a little more stiff now, “Do you smoke? I feel like your generation doesn’t have as many bad habits as mine.” Natalie pulled a small black lighter out of her pocket and a pack of Newports, tapping it on the counter and not letting me answer before continuing to talk, “Do you want to go smoke with me outside?” Something about the way she was looking at me made me want to go regardless of whether or not I smoked. 

I nodded and Natalie stood up, taking one final swig of her beer before setting it down onto the wooden bar. I followed her outside. The sidewalk was barely lit and it was fairly cold out. Natalie lifted the cigarette to my lips and placed it between my lips for me. Natalie noticed my shivering and was quick to take off her leather jacket, draping it over my shoulders with the cigarette still in my mouth, “Breathe in, it’ll make it easier to light it.” Natalie instructed, flicking her lighter on and lifting it to the tip of the cigarette. 

I breathed in, taking a deep breath of smoke. When I pulled the cigarette away from my lips, I began to cough and Natalie patted my back, “So, not a smoker?” She questioned, the corners of her lips curving upwards at my very embarrassing reaction. 

“N-No, not really.” I replied, embarrassing. 

Natalie took the cigarette from my fingers, taking a long drag of it. Is it stupid to think about how our lips are indirectly touching? Or how good Natalie looks smoking? Or how sweet she is for giving me her jacket? 

Natalie took another long drag, her body relaxing as the large cloud of smoke left her lips, “Are you done drinking for tonight?” 

“Yeah, — um, I should pay you back for that beer, shouldn’t I?” 

Natalie shook her head, “No reason to, I offered.” Another drag, “I’ll walk you home.” 

“Are you sure? I don’t want to inconvenience you.” Natalie shook her head, “Thank you.” 

There Natalie and I walked down the dimly lit street together, the cold wind being the only noise heard on that walk. Natalie didn’t seem bothered by how cold it was; either that or she didn’t want me to know. 

“The cigarette keeps me warm.” Natalie broke the silence, seemingly knowing exactly what I was thinking, “Bad habit, but I can’t seem to kick it.” Natalie stopped and dropped her cigarette to the ground, stomping it out with the heel of her boot before continuing to walk with me again, “I used to think these tasted awful when I was younger and I hated the smell. I only really smoked because, well, I did everything else. Now, I like how calm it makes me feel.” 

“You did seem more relaxed.” 

Natalie chuckled, “Well, you made me nervous.” She admitted, her stoic demeanor not fading for even a second. 

“I made you nervous? You made me nervous! I’ve never had a woman buy me a drink before.” I sheepishly admitted. 

“I’ve never bought a woman a drink before, but I found my eyes wandering again and again towards you.” 

I blushed and mentally prayed that this walk would never end. The space between Natalie and I was slowly closing, her shoulder brushing against mine as we walked, and her hand hesitantly reaching out for mine. 

I took her hand in mine and Natalie seemed the most relaxed she had been the entire night. My finger grazed over her knuckles, which were calloused, but her hold on me felt so incredibly soft. She held my hand like she was scared she would break it as though I was made of glass – fragile. 

“My house is on the left.” Natalie nodded in response. She brought me to my doorstep and dropped my hand. We both stood there for a while, staring at each other and waiting for someone to say something or do something. 

Natalie’s hand moved to my face, brushing a piece of hair away before cupping my cheek with her hand. Natalie leaned in and kissed me. It was soft, a complete contrast to Natalie’s seemingly hardened exterior. Her lips moved against mine slowly. Her hand ghosted over my hip, trying to remain as respectful as possible. I placed my hand over Natalie’s, moving her hand onto my actual hip. Natalie grabbed at the skin, a small gasp leaving her lips as the feeling of me in her hand. 

Her lips tasted like cigarettes and beer, but I didn’t care. How could I care when her hands held onto me perfectly? How could I care when her lips felt so soft against mine? 

Natalie pulled away, her voice raspy and low, “Pretty experienced for someone so young.” I rolled my eyes at her comment and brought her in for another kiss. Natalie’s touches felt more comfortable. She had no problem grabbing my hips, my waist, my face, and even beginning to slide her hand down my back. 

We pulled away and, for the first time this night and in a long time, Natalie fully smiled. 

I turned away from her for a moment, unlocking the door to my house and pushing it open. Natalie glanced at the door and then at me, “Are you gonna invite me in with you or are you gonna make me stand out here all night?”

masterlist

[skyespaddock]

You & I ✨ Chapter Eleven

Lando Norris x Madeline Green (ofc)

Summary- Madeline Green’s life has always been intertwined with Lando Norris. An invisible string has always tied them together, but what if they were meant to be more than friends?

What happens when the universe flips their lives upside down? One moment, one line crossed, and they are forever connected by more than just an invisible string. 

Warnings-  Friends to lovers, growing up together, parent with cancer, loss of parent, pregnancy, angst and a whole lot of fluff. 

Notes- Giggling and kicking my feet, I love them so much. Pretty close to pure fluff chap as a reward for getting through the last few. As always share all your thoughts, I love reading them!! - Skye x

Series Masterlist

The icy hallway of the Mclaren Technology Center stretched like an endless silence. Its trophy-covered walls getting tighter as Madeline and Lando ventured further into its confines. She'd visited the team’s home base many times throughout the years, it was often a place of comfort. Somewhere she got to see Lando shine in his element. 

Madeline would never forget the first time she stepped foot in MTC. When Lando was in his first month of working with the team, about to enter his first season as a Formula One driver. He pulled out all the stops to give her that first tour, an ordeal that took well over an hour because he insisted that she deserved the full history of every nook and cranny. 

However the space felt different today, its white walls felt restrictive and too bright as they traveled further into the lakeside building. Each step brought them closer to the meeting room, and the anxiety filled discussion that would occur within its narrow suffocating walls.

After a night of comfort and cuddles Lando had gotten back to the team, passing on Madeline’s agreement to the meeting. Despite Lando assuring her hundreds of times that she didn't have to. 

If Madeline was being honest, she would say the idea of sitting down with Lando’s team to discuss her baby made her anxious and angry all at once. She didn't understand why it was their business. Why they needed to have a whole sit down discussion on the existence of their child. But she forced herself to take a deep breath and a step back, told herself that refusing would only make things worse for Lando, and that was the last thing she wanted. So here she was. Madeline left work early for this, per Mclaren’s request to hold the meeting as soon as possible.

“It’s not too late to leave.” Lando whispered as they turned off into a darker, more narrow hallway, one that housed quiet offices and meeting spaces. “We could just run away, buy a house in Switzerland and raise an army of goats, I bet our kid would love that. We could have fat chickens as well.” Lando laughed.

“As appealing as that sounds right now, I know you wouldn't be truly happy with that.” Madeline smiled up at him. “Though the fat chickens sound nice, we could have fresh eggs.” She added.

“I’ll add that to the list then.” Lando sighed as they turned one last corner. This hallway was a dead end, leaving them with no choice but to turn into the small meeting room at the end of the hallway. 

The room was lined with grey walls, the scratchy light carpet rustled beneath Madeline’s shoes as they crossed the threshold. Multiple sets of eyes rose to greet them. The walls were decorated with large canvases, each displaying wide pictures of Mclaren cars through the ages and iconic wins. She didn't care for the decor, Madeline’s main focus was on the large table in the center of the room, surrounded by big cushioned chairs and their occupant’s restless gazes. 

“Lando, Madeline. Please take a seat.” Zak prompted. Gesturing to  two side by side empty chairs. 

The room buzzed with anticipation, tension so thick Madeline would need her heaviest kitchen knife to saw through it. Lando led her to one of the empty chairs, sending Zak a silent nod as his only greeting. Once she was seated, Madeline took a second to assess the other individuals dispersed around the room.

Zak occupied the chair across from her with a stiff Andrea positioned next to him. Accompanied by two nervous looking pr reps on either side of the table. Lando hadn't gone into much detail about what exactly occurred yesterday, but as she assessed each of their nervous gazes and fidgeting hands she could infer that it was not pretty. 

“Thank you for agreeing to this meeting Madeline, we really appreciate it.” Zak started, voice tense as if he had to put conscious thought toward every individual syllable. She just nodded, neglecting to mention that she wasn't here for them, only Lando. 

“First I want to make it clear that the team has zero intentions to make you do anything you don’t want to do, or do anything related to the baby that you don’t give approval on. This is purely just a precautionary meeting.” Zak leaned forward resting his elbow on the table beneath. 

Madeline had no anger in her body for the man, not after everything he had done for Lando. He was always nice to her in the paddock and around the garage, letting her take peeks at the pit wall every now and then. Making sure she had everything she could ever want while within the Mclaren hospitality. 

She actually really liked the man, but the serious undertones in his voice unsettled her. His words said that he wanted nothing to do with her and Lando’s baby and that she had the final say. But if that was really true, then why had they practically forced Lando to bring her along for this meeting. 

Lando hadn't used the word forced, she knew he would likely never reveal what exactly transpired at Mclaren yesterday that caused him to return in the state he did, but it didn't encourage Madeline. Not one bit.

All eyes turned toward her, as if awaiting her approval to continue. To which she gave them a slight downturn of her head, barely a nod. That was all they would get from her. 

One of the PR reps, a nervous looking woman Madeleine recognized from race weekends and tension filled press conferences, opened her mouth to continue the meeting. 

If you asked Madeline to give a summary of what exactly the woman said, she wouldn't be able to tell you half of it. Not because she was trying to be rude but because her brain ran out of space to process. She simply nodded as dates, safety precautions, and guidelines were mentioned. They didn't push, true to Zak's word they left all final decisions about how they would announce their baby to the word up to Madeline and Lando. But they also didn't seem happy about the situation, not once during the meeting did anyone in the room congratulate either of them. Make any effort to make their situation seem like a joy filled surprise and not some pr nuisance they needed to work around. 

Madeline had thoughts, many on the topic of the true terms of the team's support toward Lando but she didn't speak them. She bit her tongue, so hard she could almost taste the metallic run of blood. She wouldn't make this harder for Lando, she refused too. So Madeline instead settled for quietly lacing her fingers through his underneath the table. Tucked away for no one else to see. A private reprieve reserved for the two of them. A tether holding them together so the tension didn't sweep them away.

___

The small room emptied quickly. All its attendees anxious to be released from the confines of the stuffy room, but Madeline took her time. Stretching her back after way too long spent sitting, she smirked in victory as the soft pops of her back echoed in her ears. Taking Lando’s outstretched hand as he helped her out of the chair that had been her home far longer than she would have preferred. 

The chairs surrounding the table were now empty, all of their occupants off to their next task as if the meeting was just another box to check. But one figure stayed behind. Looming by the door with cautious eyes. 

She neared the door, ready to leap over the threshold and free herself from this room, instead coming face to face with Andrea Stella. The Italian gave her his best attempt at an easy smile, however she could see the underlying worry in his eyes. The man awkwardly shifted on his feet. 

He hadn't said much during the meeting, slight head nods and occasional support were his only contributions over the past few hours. 

Madeline watched him momentarily gaze over her shoulder where Lando stood, before tentatively speaking, “Mind if I walk you out?” The question was cautious as if expecting her to shoot him down instantly. 

She didn't. 

“Sure” her voice came out smaller than expected as Lando once again joined their hands. The three continued through the sterile walls of the MTC together.

They made it to the main hallway before anyone said anything. Andrea sighed, a short huff, before filling the silence “I know no one said it and I apologize, but congratulations. This is very exciting, for both of you. You two don’t deserve to be treated like your child is a burden before they are even born.”

Their collective pace slowed. Madeline took a moment to look at him, really look. Gazing into his eyes she saw it now, clear as day. Guilt. 

“Thank you.” She responded lightly. Holding his gaze, wanting him to know how much she truly meant it.  

“Zak doesn't mean to make you feel bad about it, not really. He’s just overwhelmed and while that doesn't excuse his behavior, he’ll come around. I know he will.” This time his words were directed to Lando. Who gave his boss a firm nod and a mumbled “thank you.”

The journey out of the Mclaren Technology Center felt much shorter than the one they took in, as they were soon greeted with the large glass exit door. Andrea turned to face them one last time, exhaling a long sigh. Releasing his shoulders from their tight laced position at his ears. “You two take care, I hope to see you again soon Madeline.” He disappeared back down the hall as his parting words fizzled out. As if he was never there. But his words stuck. They stayed in the air like a thick promise.

His words were small, they held no promises. But they still meant everything to Madeline.

Someone supported them, was in their corner. Andrea may have waited the entire meeting to express those feelings, but for now it would have to do. She felt lighter leaving the meeting, knowing that Lando at least had one person in his corner. One member of his team that saw him as a human and not just a piece of their puzzle.

___

After anxious hours spent in the suffocating confines of that small room, they were finally free. Returned to the safe leather seats of Lando’s Mclaren. 

“I thought that was never going to end.” Madeline breathed as she settled back into the seat, its soft leather cradling her tense body. 

“You and me both.” Lando replied, sparing her secured seatbelt a quick glance before wasting zero time in getting them out of there. A quick escape back to the main road.

“That went better than I thought it would, all things considered.” Madeline concluded. “Took a little longer than I would have liked, but at least it's done.” She sighed, sinking deeper into her seat.

“I would have preferred to not have to go through it at all.” Lando huffed, reached across the counsel to hold her hand. Just like he had throughout the entire meeting. “I feel like I need a vacation after that shit.”

“You and me both, if I ever hear the words preventative measures again it will be too soon.” She sighed, looking out the window. Taking in the darkening countryside passing freely outside the window. Trees blurring before her eyes, sparing her nothing but a passing glance. 

“What if we did?” Lando suggested, momentarily taking his eyes off the road. Turning to spare her a moment of gentle eye contact. “What if we escaped one last time before the season starts, just you, me and your tiny passenger.” He added the last addition with a light smile that sparkled as it reached his eyes. “We can go to Monaco, stay at my place. Do nothing but cuddle and eat, I’ll even let you bring your laptop, for half work days only.” He added with a laugh, playfully tapping his finger over hers.

“Only half days?” Madeline asked with a sly smile. 

“Don’t push your luck.” Lando gave her hand a loving squeeze.

She tilted her head, pretending to ponder his conditions. “I think you have yourself a deal Mr. Norris.” Madeline concluded with a laugh. One that released the last flecks of lingering tension from their earlier meeting. She felt lighter as it released itself from its holding place in her shoulders. The mussels rolling back in ease, no longer needed to hold the heavy weight. Not around Lando. 

“Always a pleasure doing business with you Ms. Green.” Her smiley boy grinned, bringing her hand up to his lips, sealing their deal with a kiss. 

___

The change wasn't hard or fast, her body didn't drastically shift over night, not that Madeline imagined it would. There was nothing physically noticeable, it didn't scream, no flashing light blinked over her head announcing it to the world. 

Madeline knew what it was, but not through signs. The only reminder of today’s significance came from a buzzing notification on her phone, the pregnancy app she still used reminding her what day it was. 

It was a workday first and foremost. Madeline was about to work her last in person day at the office before taking a leave of absence to work from her computer while she ran away with Lando to Monaco. But that wasn't it, wasn't worthy of this level of celebration. No. 

Today marked the end of her first trimester. Thirteen weeks ticked off, now a thing of the past. Thirteen weeks of her life, more importantly the first thirteen weeks of her baby’s existence. 

Thirteen weeks of tired muscles, and nauseous nightmares were now over. Madeline prayed the nausea would release her from its violent grip once and for all. 

Every pregnancy book and informational article led the expecting mother to believe that the second trimester would gift a corner of her spark back. Madeline wasn't expecting a miracle, after all she was still growing a human. But she was hopeful the baby would at least grant her the small luxury of keeping most of her food down. 

As Madeline rolled out of bed, an action done on her own accord and not in a mad dash to the bathroom, she was hopeful. Hopeful that things would be better this trimester. Better with her body, better with her energy but also better with Lando.

They had a firm foundation, had learned to communicate, step up for each other in times of need. Things were looking up, Madeline could finally see the horizon, the future she so desperately wanted. Her, Lando, and their baby, all one happy family. It was in reach. 

If she made it through those first thirteen weeks she could make it through the rest, whatever the approaching months threw at her, she was ready. 

___

The airplane hummed, a dim lull dampening Madeline’s busy senses, allowing her to curl deeper into the cozy cushion of the sleek airplane seat. Eyes soft but focused on the laptop screen propped comfortably on her lap. Blue light illuminating the shadows of her face.

No work stared back at her. No client emails, no spreadsheets.  Madeline’s chosen airplane activity until her and Lando arrived in Nice was once again, baby research.

This time her hyperfixation of choice was not cribs but instead car seats. Her research went deeper than simply browsing the newest styles and safety features, much, much deeper. Madeline once again had more tabs open than she could count. Filled with articles addressing topics from car seat installation, safety, appropriate fit and comfort for infants, and the best fit for her car. 

Madeline would be lying if she said she wasn't anxious about the little details of having a child, of being a mother. She was incapable of shaking the feeling that she was way out of her depth. About to enter a club that she didn't belong in, the club of motherhood. Madeline didn't know a thing about being a mother. 

She told herself these were normal new parent worries, that anyone in her situation would feel nervous about the small details of their babies safety and well being. But she knew that wasn't all, there was one small speckle of a detail that made her anxiety run deeper. 

One that wasn't so small after all. The mother sized hole in her heart was anything but small, because that's what it always came back to. Her mother. 

Madeline missed Aurora Green, desperately. She would never stop longing for her presence. Looking for her in every room, despite knowing she would never see the soft smile she treasured endlessly ever again. 

In reality Madeline knew there was little her mother could tell her about the safety of car seats. In fact if she were here the woman would likely tell Madeline to order the newest model and call it a day.

Same with the crib and all the other baby essentials that induced ten too many headaches. It was unlikely that her mother would tell her anything groundbreaking that hours of google searches couldn't. 

But the issue for Madeleine was that she wasn't given the choice. She didn't have the option of asking her mother, of going to the woman who raised her for advice. Instead being sentenced to asking the internet all her many burning questions. Google didn't smile kindly while educating her on the structural integrity of car seats, or hold her hand while advising her on the many highs and lows of breast feeding. 

Madeline was a grown woman, she could do things on her own. Didn't need someone to hold her hand. But it would be nice to have someone with her, someone who had been in her shoes and made it to the other side successfully. 

She craved the validation and opinion of a mother, her mother and every moment, every google search spent alone, reminded her further that she didn't have that. Her heart cracked just at the thought, at the painful reminder.

A gentle hand rose to her shoulder, smoothing small circles across the sweatshirt covered skin, the sensation drew her from her crashing thoughts. Wild curls leaded over her, sliding their way into view, obstructing her search tab filled computer screen. 

‘You know, I bought you wifi so you could browse baby furniture catalogues, not psycho analyze car seats. Mads your computer has so many tabs open it's about to explode.”

“I’m researching.” She defended, taking a small break to nuzzle her head into the crook of Lando’s neck. The warm skin below his hoodie too enticing to pass up. 

“No Mads” a hand moved to cup her head, fingers gently massaging her scalp in a beautiful display of affection. “Reaserch is one tab not fifty. I’m overwhelmed just looking at it.”

He curiously reached over, scrolling through the many, many tabs. “Jesus. It's a carseat Mads, not a dissertation.”

“Yeah a carseat that could potentially save our child’s life Lan, that's important.” She whined to her boyfriend who clearly didn't share her sentiment for extensive research.  

“First the crib, now this. Should I be worried about you?” He asked, pressing a kiss to her hairline, before placing a second on her furrowed brow. 

If Madeline was being honest she would say yes. Honestly he probably should be. But there was nothing Lando could do for her except feel guilty. He couldn't bring her mother back from the grave just so Madeline could ask her about car seats and infant safety. So once again she settled for denial. “No, I’m just a little anxious that's all.” Madeline hummed into his warm embrace. 

“Okay.” He whispered, his tone sounding not quite convinced. “That's enough research for today baby, before your exploding laptop takes the whole plane down.” He calmly reached over to shut the lid of her laptop, hiding all mentions of carseats from sight. “We’ll be there soon, and it’ll just be you and me Mads.”

She hummed in content, suddenly a lot calmer in his arms. “You're forgetting someone important.” Her words came out a mumbled mess of syllables blending with the background hum. 

Lando sighed in mock disapproval, catching his own slip up. “How dare I forget our newest member.” He guided a warm hand to reach between them, grazing the still bump free skin of her stomach. Another detail that sparked nerves deep in the walls of Madeline’s mind.

There was no sure way to know how long she would have until the bump would begin to reveal itself. Google seemed to give her a different answer every time she asked. But her doctor had assured her everything was fine. That it was completely normal for first time mothers to take longer to show. That Madeline had nothing to worry about.

The sentiment was reassuring coming from her doctor, someone who was highly educated and capable of telling her everything was medically fine. But Madeline would have still preferred them from her mother. Reassurance always reached deeper into her tunnel of anxiety when it came from the woman who taught her to love, nothing would ever change that. Not even the woman’s permanent absence from the physical world.

___

Madeline might have not wished to call Monaco her home, but that didn't mean the soft sunlight gracing her skin as she was calmly released from sleep’s grasp went unappreciated. It kissed her skin in all the right places, keeping her heart warm long after she exited the protection of Lando’s bed.

She was milling around the bathroom. The clean space was taken over by her skincare essentials. It was simple, something so small most people wouldn't stop to notice, to cherish. But there was something about Madeline’s things intertwined with Lando’s that she would never get over. 

Her toothbrush rested in the porcelain holder next to his, the two making perfect companions. Her skincare had been compiled into a neat corner next to his single bottle of face wash. Madeline’s choice of perfume sat hip to hip with Lando’s cologne. His deep Ralph Lauren scent sat beside the light floral Chanel bottle he had gifted her. 

Madeline was so engrossed in assessing the space around her, the one that had become half her half Lando, that she neglected to assess herself in the wide mirror that reflected the world back at her.

Warm hands wrapped around her body, their tan somehow still preserved, even in the dead of winter. Two protective palms came to rest on her stomach, the skin bare save for the small tank top that cut off just above her navel. 

“You’re showing.” Lando’s voice vibrated against her collarbone, as he mumbled the words into her skin. Voice still thick with sleep. 

Madeline took a moment to process the words, understand what they meant. A moment to pull herself out of the blissful paradise of his arms. She needed to pull herself away from thoughts of toothbrushes and perfumes sitting so close they nearly merged as one.

Madeline’s head tilted downwards, a motion performed so fast it nearly made her dizzy. There wasn't much to see, only the veins of Lando’s hands stretched around her skin. She lifted them, just for a moment releasing herself from his grip. Turning to the side, assessing eyes scanning every inch of her body through the mirror, taking more time than ever on her midsection. 

Her breath hitched as she saw it. It was subtle, so small that Madeline would almost write it off as the same bloating that often occurred in the evenings. Only it was first thing in the morning, the light pastel glow painted outside the window proved that. 

This wasn't bloating, or a small fluke, no. This was her baby, their baby. Finally revealing their tiny existence. Lando was right, she was showing.

How he noticed before her, she didn't know. But he was right, the small bump now present on her stomach proved just that.

She tore her eyes away from the mirror, away from their baby who was still safe and sound. Madeline’s gaze met Lando’s, only to find the ladder already looking at her, flickers of tears welling within his eyes. She lightly dusted the pads of her thumbs over his under eyes. Tracing the soft sleep dazed skin as if she hadn't already memorized every crevasse of his body.

“That’s them.” She whispered in awe. “Thats our baby.”

“Yeah” Lando’s hands once again reached down to trace the skin of her stomach. Before shifting downward, one knee hitting the bathroom tiles, the other following only a moment later. Bringing him face to face with her small, barely noticeable bump. 

Was it normal to shed tears over the tiniest change? Madeine supposed she didn't care if it wasn't.

“Hey, baby” Lando’s low, soothing voice whispered again. This time not to address her, but their baby.  “I love you” he placed a soft kiss just below her belly button, hands delicately placed on her hips, moving the waistband of her sleep shorts down by just the smallest margin. “So, so much.” He repeated the action, this time with a kiss above her navel. 

Madeline’s heart glowed at the sight of the man she loved  on his knees before her, whispering the sweetest affirmations to their unborn baby. 

She wasn't even sure if they could hear yet, if they could register the sound of their father’s voice. However Madeline hoped they could feel what she did, that they could feel his love for them, that he would do anything to keep them safe, protect them.

___

Madeline knew cravings, through years of late night uni cravings after hours locked in a library to the most violent of period cravings, she thought she had seen it all. Turns out wanting a little something sweet after a heavy flow day was no match to the hard and heavy punch that was pregnancy cravings. No matter how much she tried, she always ended up giving in eventually.

It started slow and steady, a whisper of a voice saying you should really have chicken nuggets and a milkshake right now. Madeline tried to brush it off, typical pregnancy cravings hitting her when she least expected. She had grown accustomed to them by now. Sugar, carbs, greasy food. She had craved it all. 

Perhaps she had been hopeful in thinking it would go away. She should have known better, but she tried to ignore it anyway, thinking it would eventually fade into the background of her mind. Sad to say Madeline was wrong, very, very wrong. 

The craving had only grown as the hours passed, evolving into a grouchy monster that could only be pleased by fried food. Mcdonalds to be exact, nothing else would do.

“Mad’s its eleven o'clock at night.” Lando whined from where he laid, moments away from going to bed. Clothed in nothing but boxers already under the all encompassing safety of the dim bedroom lights and soft duvet. 

“Landooooo, please.” Madeline pounced on top of him, now resorting to shamelessly begging her boyfriend to bringing her what she so violently craved. Her cravings didn't care that it was late at night or that she would likely regret eating a heavy greasy meal by morning. The baby wanted what it wanted, and right now that was Mcdonalds. 

“Madelineee.” Lando moaned into his pillow. “If I get it for you, will you go to bed and stop begging?”

The girl instantly piped up, pleased by his surrender. “Yes, yes. I promise.”

He sighed heavily, regretfully flopping out of his cozy cocoon to grab a hoodie and sweats. “Okay fine, but don't ever tell me I don't love you and that crazy passenger of yours.” His voice was slightly agitated but his eyes gave away his true emotions. Amusement, pure gleeful amusement.

“Don’t forget the milkshake!” She called after him. Earning a soft confirmation before the door to Lando’s apartment clicked shut, the deadbolt locking her safely inside.

___

The journey from Lando’s apartment to the nearest McDonalds was a short one. One that would take twenty minutes tops to leave and return, greasy food in tow. 

But the photos were already posted when he returned and as Madeline finished the last bites of her heavenly fast food meal the top Instagram gossip pages had already picked it up. It was growing at lightning speed. For great reason.

“I am never doing that again, next time you’re going to have to settle for delivery.” Lando threw his phone down, his body following shortly after, dramatically flopping on the bed next to her. 

His phone bounced once, twice before landing face up. The picture in question perfectly centered in Madeline's line of sight. The cause for all this drama.

It was a clear shot. Taken by a fan or another Monaco resident. Lando was the star of the shot, front and center as he walked out of Mcdonalds. With a large paper takeaway bag containing enough food to feed a small army and vanilla milkshake in hand. 

There was nothing notably outrageous about the picture, other than the caption outing the pro athlete for ordering a mountain of food from McDonald's at eleven o'clock at night.

“It’s hilarious Lan.” Madeline laughed, stomach hurting from how hilarious she found the whole ordeal. 

“It’s been less than an hour and it’s already everywhere.” Lando groaned into his pillow for the second time that night. “Ugh, the things I do for you. Did you at least enjoy it?” He pulled his head out of the soft cushion to gaze at her. Not true annoyance lived in his features, just love. A love that was worth getting publicly embarrassed over.

“It was the best thing I’ve had all week. Baby says thank you.” She added as, polishing off the last drops of her milkshake. 

“Okay, then I guess it was worth becoming a viral meme over.” Lando sighed, placing a loving hand over her barely present bump. A touch that felt normal, safe, and full of unrelenting love.

___

Thunder crackled in a booming symphony against the company of cascading rain falling into the Mediterranean sea like a gentle gift. Madeline watched each drop as it fell, transported from the full grey clouds onto the Monaco view that stretched before her eyes. 

Despite the raging storm beneath, Madeline was shielded from harm, protected by the covered terrace. Cozy on the outdoor couch in the comfort of one of Lando’s Mclaren sweatshirts and soft pajama pants to cover her delicate skin. Hands settled safely on the small bump of her stomach, Madeline was at peace, protected by the rain.

The sliding of the glass door pulled her attention from the security of the rainstorm.

“Figured I’d find you out here.” Lando dropped a warm, soft blanket over her shoulders. Moving to join her. Pressing a kiss on her forehead, hand brushing gently across hers, over her stomach. A greeting to both her and the life beneath. 

“It’s a good one today.” She hummed in content, dropping her head to rest on his shoulder. A space that was sacred, always safe.

Madeline’s mind was always drawn to her mother, she saw her in the rain, in watching mothers laugh with their daughters, even in her own reflection. Knowing that she was going to become a mother herself to a beautiful child awoke a deep longing for her own. 

There were so many things she wanted to ask her. 

Like what kind of crib is the safest? 

What do you need to pack in a hospital bag? 

How do you stop throwing up at the smell of coffee? 

How do you mentally cope with your body changing during pregnancy?

All things that google or her doctor could give her the answer too, but it wasn't the same. She wanted her mother because she would have wanted to be there. Would have loved to be there.

“What's going on in that beautiful head of yours?” Another delicate kiss graced her forehead.

“I just-I miss her so much.” She choked. Tears pricking her eyes. “This is something daughters picture going through with the support of their mothers. There’s so many things I wish I could ask her. I have no clue what I’m doing-and I’m scared.” Tears now streamed down her face as she hiccuped.

Lando didn't try to stop her. Just tightened his grip around her as if to say I’m here. 

“I just want my mom, and I miss her so much.” Her tears rained onto Lando’s sweatshirt-clad shoulder, a perfect match to the rain falling onto the Monaco streets. Forming small puddles below, reminding her of the ones she used to play in with her mother on stormy days just like this one.

“Does this have anything to do with your obsessive research?” Lando gently asked, voice soft as if he didn't want to push her too far. Pry too deep into her anxious mind.

He was spot on, he always was when it came to her. In most cases Lando could read her emotions better than she could. A magical gift she would never understand but would always be grateful for.

“Yeah-yeah I think that is why.” She mumbled into him, as if she could crawl into his skin and never have to feel stress. Never have to violently miss her mother again. Just be forever safe in his embrace. “I just wish she was here, to see me. To help me through what happens next. I know it’s pathetic.”

“It’s not pathetic Mads, it’s completely valid. If I could get her to you I would. I may not be able to bring your mom back, but I can lend you mine. She can keep you company while I’m away, I can arrange for her to stay with you when you need someone when I’m gone. You can ask her anything, she’s had four kids, she's seen it all.” Lando reassured.

“Really?” She tilted her head up, placing a gentle kiss against his stubble lined jaw. “You would do that?”

“I would do anything to make this easier for you. I miss her too, I like to imagine what she would think of this. Me and you. She’d be proud of you. So proud Mad’s, just like I am.”

Lando was right, he couldn't bring her mother back, nothing could. But he was doing his best to make her as comfortable as possible. 

They sat there, intertwined with the soft patter of rain as pleasant company. She didn't know how to be a mom or how to raise a child, but she knew that she would teach them to love the rain. 

Just as her mother had taught her.

___

“Is this entirely necessary?” Lando questioned for what had to be the fifth time within the last ten minutes. 

“Yes, yes it is.” Madeline responded simply. “Now give me your hand again. I need to see what this one looks like.” She directed her boyfriend. Softly grabbing his wrist, bringing his hand before her once more. Taking a moment to assess the now colorful skin on the flip side of his palm before finding a free spot and filling it with yet another lipstick swatch. 

“Are you gonna buy any of these, or did you just drag me in here to use me as your personal lipstick canvas?” Lando sighed, his voice holding no true frustration. The amused smile on his face gave away his true feelings toward their current situation. Despite all his whining complaints, Lando was enjoying this. 

“I need to see what they look like.”

“Can you not do that on your own hands?” Lando laughed, gesturing to her clean, pristine swatch free hands. 

“I like using your hands better. There's more space.” Madeline replied, full focus narrowed in on analyzing the most recent shade she had decorated the back of her boyfriend's hand with. Sighing in approval before adding it to the slowly filling basket that Lando was also carrying for her. 

“Plus this ensures that you stay with me. I don’t want you getting lost again.” She added with an amused smirk.

“That was one time, and I was only lost for a minute.”

“Lan, you called me in a panic asking where I was.” She laughed looking up at him. “I was right behind you.”

“I don’t like this conversation anymore.” Lando pouted. “Are you done using me or are you moving to my arms next?”

“You are free of your duties sir.” Madeline moved towards the checkout counter of the small Monegasque beauty store. Reaching to grab her basket from Lando so that she could purchase her new products.

Only for the basket to be swiftly removed from her reach, fingertips just barely grazing the outside edge as Lando relocated the basket to the hand furthest from her. His other hand intertwining with hers. Keeping it occupied so it wouldn't attempt to snatch the basket again.

“Nice try, pretty girl, this one's on me.” Lando laughed, pressing a kiss to her hair.

“But that's my stuff." She argued, hoping Lando wasn't seriously misjudging how much makeup cost these days. “And it’s expensive, let me do it.”

“I don't care.” He reiterated, greeting the beautiful woman at the checkout counter with a polite smile before handing over his card.

Madeline blinked at the ease by which he cared for her, as if it was as simple as breathing for him. 

“You didn't have to do that.” She said again as they returned to the sunny winter Monaco streets. 

“I know,” he hummed. “I wanted to.”

It was their last full day in the principality, their last full day together before Lando would return back to his life as an every busy Formula One driver. He would drop her back in the UK, make sure she was settled before a quick turn around to Bahrain for pre-season testing. They would spend barely over a week apart before being reunited for the race weekend.

A week was minuscule compared to their months spent apart when she was still in school and he was fighting for a place in the rapidly evolving motorsport world. As selfish as it sounded Madeline wasn't ready to give him up, not when many hard months of pregnancy loomed before her like mountains to climb.

They continued their journey through the afternoon streets, arms linked, keeping them intertwined and grounded in the safety of each other. As they traveled further from the busy tourist streets filled with shops and eager customers, their surroundings quieted. Bustling streets now replaced with calm empty roads. 

As a small gust of wind whipped cold air into their faces Madeline leaned further into Lando. His body heat offering her a quiet reprieve, a soft protection from the elements. 

“So-” Madeline hummed. “I’ve been thinking about the meeting with Mclaren-” her words instantly caught the drivers attention. Causing his gaze to snap down towards her. Breath momentarily shuddering.

Madeline picked up on his anxiety sparked by the mention of the meeting, she could sympathize with him. Her heart rate picked up every time she thought about the fact that their personal lives, their baby could become public knowledge at the drop of a hat. 

She gave him a light squeeze in reassurance that this wouldn't be a heavy conversation and it wouldn't end in an argument. Not today, they were past that.

“I’ve just- I’ve been thinking about the media and about us.” She paused momentarily, gaze rising to look at the clear blue skies above. Before diverting to the curly haired boy eagerly waiting for her to continue. “I think we should only give away the information we want to, keep things private- but that doesn't necessarily mean things have to be a secret.”

For the second time in the short conversation, Lando’s breath hitched, but he let her continue, knowing she was not yet done voicing her thoughts.

“I don’t want it to be loud. It doesn't need to be when people already expect we’re together, but I think we should confirm that we’re together, you and me.”

She waited. Silence consumed them, a soft one this time. One free of tension, like the air was resting. Giving them this small break to breathe. 

“I think-” Lando’s arm moved completely around her shoulder, pulling her impossibly closer while maintaining their calm stroll. “That, that’s a great idea Mads.” He affirmed with a kiss to her forehead, the action and approval bringing a smile to her face.

“I agree, I don’t want it to be loud. With you it doesn't need to be. We could do it at Bahrain, arrive in the paddock hand in hand. No big announcement, that's all the world needs to know.” Lando suggested and Madeline’s heart sang at the fact that they were on the same page. Finally. 

“That way, when it comes time for the world to know about the baby, it’s a little less out of the blue.” Madeline concluded her train of thought.

Lando nodded alongside her in approval. “One step at a time Mads, you’re doing great. Just remember, you don't owe them anything okay. Not the media, not the team. Don’t let them influence your decisions about this.”

“I won’t.” Madeline nodded. She meant it, she really did.

Making things official to the media was the first step. One that would make things easier for them, they wouldn't have to resist staring into each other's souls when they found themselves on Max’s stream. They wouldn't have to resist kissing in parc ferme after Lando had a good race. They wouldn't have to hide, and that in itself took a load off Madeline’s shoulders.

One that left more room for excitement, for the baby, for her and Lando’s future. For everything that was yet to come. Even the unknown.

[karisana]

guess who it is AYY 🪬

i love your work sm its actually so yummy 👅👅

could we do like, headcanons of the whole band? i think itd be cutesy and open up cool prompts to more than one group of ppl ( if that makes sense)

band x hypersensitive reader? its super up to you whatever you do with this

youre super duper cool and i love ur writing smm!! take breaks and eat and drink nd all that good stuff

ur so cool twin

-🪬

it’s all too much

a/n: SURPRISE!!! it came today instead of tomorrow!! okay so if it wasnt obvious from my follow up post to this ask, i dont know a lot about hypersensitivity 😭 but since you specified that it was emotional that helped a lot! tried my best to do as much research as i could on this, i hope i got it accurate :) also ive never written headcanons before so this was kinda awkward for me and i dont think they turned out very well.. but hopefully there will be improvement 😓 these were really fun to write though!! i think headcanons are my favorite form of writing, i love to read headcanons so this was nice to do! also i tried doing the small font thing for the hcs, idk how i feel about them... i might go back and change it later 💀

paul :

• i think paul would be the most reassuring and comforting in this scenario

• it might be a bit awkward for him if the emotions you're feeling are negative assuming he's never met someone who deals with these struggles, but he makes it a point to learn what helps you to make you feel better or calm down as soon as possible

•  though, at first he might make comments like "there's nothing to worry about, love." only because he doesn't realize that doesn't help you at all and he'll see no issue with it until you have to tell him.

•  he comes to appreciate it after a while, the positive emotions at least. especially since you're more responsive to what other's need and empathetic, that could definitely be a big help to him, especially around the time the band was falling apart.  

john :

• john would (unfortunately 💔) likely be a bit of a dick about this at first.

• again, assuming they've never had to deal with anyone like this, let alone a partner, he would just brush it off and tell you you're being dramatic over nothing.

• another one that you would have to explain your feelings to and why those feelings are so heightened. 

• after though, he'd become more aware of your condition and keep his eyes on you if you're ever in a place where you could start feeling overstimulated or in any stressful situations you're going through.

• not at all afraid to tell someone off if they ever say anything negative about you or your sensitivity.

george :

• i think george would be the most responsive towards your feelings, not loudly in the way the others might be, though.

• his support shows up more as him silently grabbing your hand and pulling you out of a crowd when he notices you're starting to get overwhelmed.

• he's a bit of a difficult one though, he has his moments where he talks a lot and you get more of that when you officially get together but most of the time he does just prefer to be quiet.

• you sometimes mistake his silence for something that it's not and get frustrated because you can't understand exactly why he's being so quiet. especially because you're more sensitive to people's feelings, not being able to read his makes you feel like theres a lack of connection between you two.

• you have to eventually sit down and talk about it since its led you to have many emotional outbursts before. you get the clarity you need, even if you still worry ocassionally, he's always there to reassure you.

ringo :

• ringo, naturally, makes a bit of a joke out of your sensitivity. it might sound mean at first but he really doesn't mean to say anything with ill intent, he just likes to tease.

• he'll often use jokes and funny distractions when you're feeling a lot, almost trying to escape or avoid the seriousness of your situation.

• yet another one you have to talk to about this. he'll tone down the teasing after you guys talk but it does still slip out every now and then.

• he does start to reassure you a lot, i think that's something he would like from a partner given how he's often undermined next to the other guys.

• of course its different reassurance, but reassurance nonetheless. he wants to return the sentiment, especially if it'll make you feel better about your sensitivity.

• overall, he's pretty good about, mostly just trying his best even if it doesn't seem like it.

[slowlyoats]

Out of Time:

A Lost Boys Reader Insert Fanfiction

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Summary: Y/n is camping with her family, when she encounters a dangerous man. She is kidnapped and transported back to the 80’s, where she encounters The Lost Boys.

Lore Note: In this story the events of the movie took place, with a few different outcomes. None of the boys die, but the big show down at Grandpa’s house still occurs, and it ends with Max and the Emerson’s coming to an agreement to stay out of each other's ways moving forward. Star runs off with Michael and takes Laddie with her. They still live in Santa Carla but they tend to avoid the boardwalk. The Frog Brothers take a break from vampire hunting, seeing that it is much more dangerous than they actually thought. They save face by saying they are turning their hunting skill set inward to protect the “domestic home front” AKA their parents and the comic book store. Other supernatural beings will be introduced through the story alongside the implied vampires. 

Warnings: Y/n is female, Kidnapping, scary forest, gun violence, scared child, first chapter set up (I promise it gets better lol) swearing, mentions of violence against women, forced vampire turning?, creepy middle-aged man

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 1: The boys are going to love you

The leather creaks under my fingertips as I grip his leather jacket tighter. The wind whips against my face, forcing my hair into tangles that I know will take hours to get out. 

But I don’t care. 

He smells like licorice, salt, and pure danger. I pull my face closer to his neck, feeling his earring lightly sway back in force, hitting my check. 

I inhale again; his lips quip upward-

“Y/N?”

My eyes fly open, as I quickly sit up on the half deflated air mattress. 

My little cousin stands in the entry of my tent, dressed in a matching Five Nights at Freddy’s pj set. 

Shifting from foot to foot he opens his mouth. “I have to go to the bathroom.” 

I sigh and look at the fitness watch on my wrist. It’s 2am. 

“Just go in the trees, where your dad showed you yesterday.” 

He shakes his head. “I have to go number 2.”

“Of course you do.” I say with a smile as I untangle myself from the sleeping bag. 

“Go wait by the fire pit, and I will be right there to walk you to the bathrooms.”

Eagerly he nods his head and runs out of the tent. 

I search for my pants, since the oversized tshirt im wearing is not enough clothing for a walk to the camp bathrooms. 

I hum as I shift through my back pack, and then look behind our drink cooler, then my….

Oh, there they are. My leggings hang from a hook in the corner. I forgot that I had hung them up the night before. We had gone kayaking, and my doofus of a brother had capsized us in an attempt to impress some college girls in a canoe.  

I huff, pulling them down from the spot. They're still wet, but I have no choice so I pull them on. As I struggle to roll them up my body, I think back to the dream I had. 

It was a nice dream. The same one I’ve had for the past few months. Sometimes it changes, like the man driving the motorcycle will smell like hairspray or gasoline instead. Or the leather jacket will change style or color. It’s an odd dream to have, but it’s better than a nightmare I guess. 

I walk out of the tent, and zip it up behind me so no critters or mosquitoes will get in. I spot Mitchell sitting on a log by the fire pit. 

It’s dark, and the fire has long since been out, but the coals still hum red, and offer a source of light, though it be a small one. 

“Give me one more second Mitch.” I say as I turn to my parents tent. 

“Okay, but hurry up! I don’t know how many more seconds I have left.” 

Chuckling at my cousin’s comment, I unzip my parents tent half way and peek in. Their cuddled up together under a giant flannel sleeping bag. My mom’s cheek rests on my father’s chest. 

I know I should wake my father and have him walk Mitch and I up to the bathrooms, or at the very least tell him where we are going. But they look too peaceful, so I decide not to wake them. I’m sure I will get an ear full tomorrow morning when he finds out I walked all the way to the bathrooms, in the dark, by myself. 

But, that's tomorrow y/n’s problem. 

I unzip the tent a little more and pull the locked gun case towards me. 

My father never goes camping without protection and neither does any of my aunts or uncles. It may seem a bit paranoid, but we’re in bear and mountain lion country, and you can never be too careful. I type in the 6 digit passcode and the box clicks open. I pull out the hand gun, and grab a magazine of bullets. I check the chamber of the gun and make sure there is no bullet in there. 

I take a step back and zip my parents back up. 

My father has drilled gun safety into my head since I was a pre teen. I know how to handle a gun, and I know from previous camping trips he is fine with me taking his for occasions like this.

I place the magazine of bullets in my back pocket, and the gun on my other side. 

I turn back to Mitch, who currently looks like he is going to explode. I quickly grab a Coleman Lantern, and thrust it into his arms. 

“Okay little man, let’s get going.”

He jumps up from his seat and starts walking down the wooden path toward the bathroom. I follow close behind. 

The light from the lantern is bright enough that we can see the path ahead, and a few feet around us. 

It’s not a long walk, maybe seven or eight minutes tops. We make it about two, when Mitch speaks.

“I’m scared.”

I softly smile, though I know he can’t see it. 

“I used to get scared too, out in the woods at night, when I was your age. Do you know what Uncle Damon would do to make me feel better?” 

“What?” He asks, tilting his head back, but still keeping pace. 

“We would sing his favorite song.” I smile again, remembering how scared I was on that very first camping trip.

There’s a short moment of silence, the sounds of the forest at night, and our shoes hitting the dirt ground filling the atmosphere. 

He says, “can you sing it now?” 

“Only if you sing with me.” I reply 

He slows his pace a little, so that we are walking alongside each other. 

“I’ll start, and if you know the lyrics join, okay?” I say 

Mitch nods his head. 

I clear my throat. 

“Rising up, Back on the street, Did my time took my chances….” I start. 

Mitch looks up to me “I don’t know this one.”

I smile down at him “yes you do! Just listen!” 

“Went the distance now I’m back on my feet, just a man with his will to survive!”

I can see his face light up when he recognizes the song and we hit the chorus right as we see the flood lights outside the bathrooms. 

We reach them, laughing and singing “ it’s the eye of the tiger, it’s the thrill of the fight! Rising up to the challenge of our rivals!”

Mitch turns to me and hands me the lantern, before he runs into the men’s bathroom.

I love that kid, I think, taking a seat on a bench. 

The bathrooms act as a little island of light, breaking up the darkness of the woods. 

I continue to hum to myself as I wait for him to be done, and switch off the lantern to conserve the battery. 

I look up at the sky. This must be the clearest night we have had in a long while, since I can see every constellation. There’s Cassiopeia….the Big Dipper…..Hercules…..

A branch snaps

The sound jolts me back down to earth, and I survey the foliage surrounding us. My heart beats quickly, but I don’t see anything. It’s was probably just an animal- 

Another branch snaps, and I can see the outline  of a shadowy figure walking toward us. It’s not coming from any of the paths which is odd, since you’re only allowed to camp on official sites, you can’t make your own…

A red flag raises in my mind. 

I stand from my seat, and mentally check that the gun and bullets are on my person still. In the same breath, I mentally yell at myself for being so paranoid, they're probably just a regular camper who got a little turned around.  The world would be a much better place, if we were all more trusting and had a little more faith in humanity I tell myself. 

I breathe deeply through my nose, and then let it out through my mouth. 

The figure penetrates the ring of light the bathrooms cast.

For a moment I have a hard time processing what I’m seeing. 

The man is tall, with broad shoulders. He has a pair of computer geek glasses on his nose, and a sharp jaw line. The strangest part about him, though, is he is wearing a suit that's at the very least three decades out of fashion. He has a twig sticking out of his collar, and dirt covers his pants. He must have tripped and fell I guess? 

Our eyes meet. He smiles with all his teeth. The wind picks up and blows some litter between us. An owl hoots from deep somewhere in the tree line. 

“Hello, there.” 

The second red flag shoots up to attention. 

I was raised to be an inclusive and loving person, by my parents. To never judge someone based on their appearance or beliefs or ideas. But the vibes are hella off with this guy. I mentally check for the gun again, and nod  friendly, and yet sternly back to him. 

Hopefully he will get the message.

He doesn’t. 

“I seem to have gotten a bit lost….do you have a map by chance?” His voice is crisp, and precise. 

The sound of a toilet flushing fills the air, as I nod my head no. 

“I’m sorry, but I don’t….” I pause trying to think of a way to get him to leave. “I believe there’s one up by the main office though. That way.” I point behind the bathrooms. “It’s a straight shot, no way you could get lost this time.” I try to push out a laugh to ease the suspense in the air, but it ends up coming out weak and high pitched. 

I hear small steps, and then a faucet turns on. 

The man just stands there and stares at me. 

He takes a step towards me. 

The third red flag flies. 

I’m tempted to take a step back at first, but that would put me against the building wall. So I stand my ground, casually lifting my shirt up,  pretending to itch my side, to show the hilt of the gun. 

It works, and his eyes quickly follow the movement down to my side. 

His head tilts, then his expression darkens.

The faucet turns off. 

Small footsteps get louder, and Mitch walks out the door to my side. He looks at the man, confusion on his face as he then looks at me. 

He opens his mouth, but I cut him off. 

“Let's go, Bud.” I say as I turn the lantern on and hand it over. My eyes never leave the man as I do this.

 Something is wrong, really wrong. 

I push Mitch in front of me and tell him to walk. He does as he is told, sensing the tension in the air. I slowly walk behind him, but never fully turn my back to the man. 

As we walk back into the woods, the man gaze never leaves mine until we’re out of eyesight. 

Mitch is mumbling about something, but I’m not listening. 

I take the gun off my side and reach for the magazine, I load it. 

Mitch turns his head at the clicking noise , and stops walking. 

“Keep walking, don’t stop.” I say sternly. His little brown eyes go wide at my tone. Never having heard me speak to him that coldly before. 

He turns back and does as he is told. 

I listen carefully as we walk, every sound has me on edge. I can hear my father in my head yelling at me for loading the gun, “you should never load a gun unless you are intending to shoot.” He would say. “Guns are not toys, every time you pick one up, remember there is always a possibility someone could get hurt or die.”

I breathe through my nose, trying to calm my racing heart beat. 

I’m sure this will be a silly memory tomorrow morning, that I will laugh at myself for as we all sit in the sunlight, eating scrambled eggs from a cast iron pan and drinking crappy coffee. 

A branch snaps.

Mitch stops walking. 

I grab him by the arm roughly, and pull him along with me “don’t stop!” I hiss. I can hear the panic in my voice , and I know Mitch can hear it too. 

He starts to cry “you’re scaring me y/n.”

My heart breaks for a moment, but I can’t feel it now, as adrenaline starts kicking at my heart like a rabbit who’s realized they've gotten a little too close to a snare. 

I keep pulling him along, we are almost back to the site. 

Something big moves through the foliage. 

I look down at Mitch

“If I tell you to run. Run. You understand me? You run and you don’t look back, and you wake everyone up okay?”

He starts to sob, I grab his check 

“Mitch, you are the strongest boy I have ever met and I know you can do it. You are so much braver than you think.” 

Another branch snaps, and this time I can feel him behind us. 

I whirl around, and raise the gun up. 

The man smiles again, and I can feel my skin crawl. 

I clip the safety off. The sound is deafening. Final. Deadly serious. 

“If you take one step closer to us, I will kill you.” I muster as much confidence as I can as the words leave my mouth, but my voice still shakes. 

He tilts his head again. 

“Now, miss, there's no need for threats. I just want to talk.” 

He takes three, quick steps forward with his hands out reached. 

A thousand and one headlines run through my head.  Dead girl found on side of road, woman with head and feet missing found in lake, the list goes on and on. And the rage of that knowledge,  the rage of hundreds of thousands  murdered and missing women fills me. 

And I refuse to be another statistic. I refuse to die that way, at the hands of a man’s violence. 

I pull the trigger. 

For a moment I watch it all happen from above. I see the red. I see him fall backwards to the ground .I hear Mitch scream. I yell at him to run. He runs, the light of the lantern disappearing with him. 

I’m frozen.  Left alone in the dark, with a dead man on the ground. 

That I…..

I killed. 

I jolt. I feel cold and hot at the same time. I fall over and vomit. 

I just…..I….he….fuck…..

I vomit again when I see the blood on my hands and shirt.

I’m still griping the gun so tight I know I will have an indent in my hand tomorrow, but I can’t let it go. My mind won’t let me.

I stare at him. There’s a massive hole in his chest, from where I shot him. 

I dry heave. 

I know I should move, try to walk back to camp. Get help. But I can’t. 

His head moves.

My mind doesn’t accept it at first. It must have been a trick of the mind, I’m not thinking straight. 

He moves again. 

I jump back, on my hands and knees. 

He moves his head right and left, like he is testing it. 

His eyes open. 

They're yellow. 

I shake my head, squeezing my eyes shut. This can’t be…..no I’m hallucinating….

I open my eyes again,  now he’s staring right at me.

A rumble moves through his chest, as a laugh escapes his mouth. The hole…the hole isn’t there anymore. 

I try to jump to my feet but I just fall backwards on my butt. 

This…can’t….what?….

His laugh grows louder as he slowly pulls himself up. He towers over me. 

“It’s been awhile since someone has shot me,” he laughs again, knocking his head up to the sky. “Ah…..And of course you're their mate. They couldn’t be bonded to an easy to handle girl, no, they had to be with Annie Oakley in the flesh!!” 

I hear yelling in the distance. Footsteps trample the forest floor. My mother is screaming. My father is yelling. Someone is running towards us.  

I raise the gun at him again. 

He tsks, while tilting his head. 

“Are we going to do this again, young lady?” 

I keep the gun raised 

“Who the fuck are you?!” I yell. Hoping to keep him distracted till my family can get to me.

His eyes gleam then, a grin takes over his face. 

“Now, now, don’t use that type of language with me. You’ve got a foul mouth on you just like my boys.” 

He takes a step towards me. I scoot back.

Before I can even comprehend it, he lunges, grabbing the gun in one hand, throwing me over his shoulder with the other. 

I scream. 

But he only tsks again, and starts walking into the forest off the path. 

“Help! Help!” I scream “let me go!” I hit his back as hard as I can with my fists and swing my legs to try and get leverage. But nothing works, he’s like solid stone.

“Now I will have none of that.” He growls out, clutching my legs so tight I swear something sharp pierces them. His voice reeks of authority, and it sends raw fear down my spine. 

I freeze. I know I should fight. I should scream. 

“See? That’s better. I would have liked this evening to go in a different direction, but destiny must have had another plan.” He pauses, rummaging through his pockets. He stops when he  finds what he was looking for, and throws it on the ground. 

A wave  of strong….wind….energy? Bursts around us, my vision goes white. The world swirls around us, there’s deep pressure on my skull.

I think I’m going to pass out. 

He starts to talk again.

“Oh, where are my manners? I forgot to introduce myself. My name is Max, your future sire.” 

My what?…… my vision goes black, and I feel myself slip into unconsciousness. 

But before it does I hear him say 

“My boys are going to love you.”

[bi-panicatthedisco]

Beyond The Screen.

Scarabia Part.

[Heya, author here! Love the scarabia dudes! Kalim may be my favorite out of them, but Jamil has grown on me so much haha. I hope I didn't mischaracterize them too badly lolol, this is one of my first times writing them this extensively. But as always, remember to drink some water and get some rest! And I hope you have a great rest of your day!!!]

One of the last things you would've expected after downloading a game like twisted wonderland, is for the characters to leave the dang game and show up irl! But things rarely go as you expect, and this is something it's nice to be wrong about.

It was a pretty regular day when it happened, just sitting down and playing twst. Only for an impromptu single pull on the banner, turning into SSR particles and a fancy coffin. Of course you're getting excited. But instead of showing your new card, you have the character fall right out of your screen onto the floor in front of you. Oh goodness gracious...

-----------------Kalim al-Asim-----------------

Kalim practically falls onto your lap, he looks excited to see you. He's been waiting a long time to meet the player! They've been really nice to him just like a friend, and he's never been able to say it back! As soon as he realized he was gonna see you in person, he became super happy. Obviously he wants to hug his friend!

"PLAYER!!! Ahaha I'm so glad to see you! This definitely calls for a party! Jamil? Oh, I guess Jamil couldn't come with. Maybe I can go back and bring him, since he really wanted to meet you too? Huh, I don't actually know how to go back though. Well no need to focus on that! I can throw a party just for us right now, then I can figure out how to get Jamil here too so we can all celebrate together!"

And throw a party he did! It might not have been as elaborate as his usual parties back at scarabia, but it was a heck of a time! Even despite the confusion that still is lingering from a Fictional Character showing up in your house. Who's currently setting up a game of mancala, and completely ready to teach you the rules if you don't understand. It's super fun!!

Kalim is having the time of his life, I mean he gets to hang out with the player for the foreseeable future? And they're being really nice to him? This is a dream come true! He knew they would be close if he ever got to meet them. I mean they were really nice to him even while he was just a character to them! He already knows they'll let him stay with them, and he can't wait to get to know them better!

-a few months later-

There's never a dull day with Kalim. Even when he isn't throwing a party, he's pulling you to look at some new thing he made, or a new pet he adopted. Even though he understands he can't buy you as many gifts as he'd want too, having given you his jewelry early on to pay for his stay here. He still makes you a lot of homemade gifts! Often based off the things you do together, when he insists you show him around your world.

Kalim has been having the grandest time as well! Not only has he gotten much closer to you than basically anyone else, but he doesn't have to worry about assassination attempts! Your world is so amazing! He wishes he could stay here forever! That doesn't mean he'll give up on finding his way back home, but... Maybe he put it on hold. And he has to admit he doesn't like the feeling he gets when you mention him going home.

"Huh? Home? Yeah, I've been working on it! I bet Jamil is worried sick about me. But I wanna focus on enjoying the time with you right now! Can we just do that for awhile longer? Please...? Sorry haha, I don't wanna bring the mood down!"

Kalim looks... Anxious? Just for a moment. He doesn't wanna go home if it means leaving you, but he doesn't even know how to say that. He just knows he won't leave if he can help it!

------------------Jamil Viper-------------------

Jamil manages to catch himself fairly easily, not one to be caught off guard by a simple drop. What does catch him off guard however is fully seeing your face for the first time, so close he could reach out and touch it. His breath catches for an instant before he regains his composure. Shaking his head before speaking.

"Ahem, sorry player. It's lovely to meet you. Although I have technically Met you before, through your screen I mean... Nevermind. in any case, I trust you'll let me stay here with you? Unless all those words of flattery were false~"

He has a sly grin on his face as he takes your hand in his, obviously already knowing how much you care about him. And believe me, he's ready to take full advantage of this. Please understand he doesn't intend to misuse your good intentions, but he does fully intend to exploit them as far as they'll go. I mean, you know better than most people who he is, and yet you still care about him. You're either naive, or just don't know what you're getting into.

Either way, Jamil loaths to admit he's grown (very slightly!!!) fond of you through that screen. And will not let that affection you have for him stray, even the slightest bit. Here, he won't have to hide anything or hold back. Here, he can be completely free. So he's not going to let that slip away. He's already planning how best to keep everything perfect, and he's not above using his unique magic should it become necessary. Although deep down, he really hopes it doesn't come to that.

-a few months later-

It's nice having someone around to help with the chores, Jamil knows that more than anyone. So of course he's been doing that for the last few months, and still getting up early to make breakfast before going to a job he was able to get. It was just at a fast food place, but he quickly become a manager. So it's not the worst? He'll never bring you food from there if he can help it though, he doesn't want you eating anything except for his cooking.

He's been becoming increasingly paranoid about you, a strange feeling in his gut whenever you leave your home without him. Worries and doubts just don't leave anymore, except for when you're near and have your eyes solely on him. He's not sure what this feeling is exactly, but he already promised himself he wouldn't hold back at all in this world. Especially when you come up to him and ask again about when he's going home.

"Sigh... We've had this conversation a hundred times, I'm working on it. Don't you trust me? And besides that, is there a reason you want me gone so badly? Here I thought I was one of your favorites. ...nevermind, I made dinner. It's your favorite. Let's just eat."

Hmph he might as well not start a fight, it'd be frustrating to have you upset with him. But he's never going back to that world, not while you're in this one.

[seleneroserm]

(Skip to next Parenthesis for Batman Headcanons)

Hi! I've been... Deeply busy, so I haven't had much time to post.

I don't have any art to show really, and I want to make a more well developed post for my project stuff, so I figured I'd share some headcanons and ideas that I genuinely subscribe to for my interpretation of Batman.

(Batman Headcanons Below)

- Alfred enforced therapy on Bruce both before and after his training trip, resulting in Bruce not being an abusive ass (Thanks DC)

- Dick has literally no sense of money for the regular person since he went from being a child in a traveling circus to the child of a multi millionaire. For this reason, Teen Titan accounting is mostly handled by Cyborg and Speedy.

- There is a firm mental divide between Bruce and Batman, and him not communicating or handling this well is what leads to lot of the miscommunication and interpersonal drama in the bat family, since the rest (understandably) don't really separate the two identities in their heads much.

- Jason coming back to life was a mix of Gotham dirt (ala Solomon Grundy swamp water and seeped out Lazarus fumes alongside good old pollution) and a convenient strike of lightning to activate all the reactions. (The lightning struck the coffin, not Jason. No cool scars, sadly)

- There are other helpers in the mansion, because I sincerely doubt Alfred can upkeep a child, an entire mansion, and legal disputes all practically alone for over a decade (no matter how awesome he is). They are vaguely aware Batman is a thing, but are not at all involved and paid enough to not care. Rich people get up to weirder shit, at least Bruce is nice to them. It's still not many though, maybe 3-8 people.

- Kate is an artist, and designs her own tattoos. While they don't really interact much in canon, it'd be cute to see Kate and Damian drawing together.

- Finally, the Teen Titans and the Young Justice are completely different teams with very little overlap in members. Dick is the founding bat of the Teen Titans, Tim is the founding Bat of Young Justice. Jason never got to join either one before he died, and Damian joins the Teen Titans once they are established as a subteam of the now older Titans.

[gakuenfyodor]

// Here it is (I have yet to sit down and write it all but this is a start!)

// Ah, I see! I heavily do not prefer to discuss with others about main Fyodor much as I simply find such villainous characters overused even if he has his own flavor. In a way, I share your dislike despite the reasons for it. Gakuen Fyodor is original (my favorite version) and heck, even Wan Fyodor has depths mainstream media has yet to bring to the big screen in terms of villainy (if he HAS to be). Regardless, main Fyodor's actions are atrocious so that's understandable and Beast Fyodor's Nietzsche bullshit is something else. As for Dazai, I appreciated the turmoil and scathing emotions that we were given in Beast, if only to glimpse at his rawness, and I find ADA Dazai an interesting direction for characters like Dazai as I notice they aren't always allowed to be on the side of good in mainstream media. In any case, there are folks who dislike two characters individually yet adore what they bring together and the opposite (for example, as an old Naruto head, Sakura had nice lessons to impart a few times as an individual and Sasuke was my favorite character. Though as a couple? Detest). Dazai himself is controversial due to his treatment of Akutagawa (and not trying to repair it or engage with Akutagawa about it at least like a decent human being. Many people who paint these "heroism" or positive narratives forget Dazai is still Dazai and he remains on training wheels to embrace the finer things of human life) in main universe and traumatizing Beast Aku and Sushi (+ others), and destroying Beast for Oda to live (Beast Fyodor in return, sought to fix Beast, even if his ways are... crude. I don't find Beast Fyodor interesting nor his ridiculous views. My least favorite of the Fyodors). So yeah, I get it, though scratched only surface here.

// Yup, Dazai doesn't hate Fyodor and Fyodor doesn't hate Dazai. However, Dazai is less open about his feelings than Fyodor as we can observe from the fact that Asagiri himself had to confirm Dazai's feelings for Fyodor and Oda in his expo interview yet Fyodor in his own words has already in main + other mediums. According to another Tumblr, Asagiri has plans to dedicate time in exploring Fyozai so I am excited as that can help the audience understand this pair with clarity. We haven't even seen their first time.

// The culprit here is them being used as enemies for plot. The plot wouldn't move to where Asagiri desires it to be if Fyodor wasn't targeting everything Dazai holds dear in the main universe.

// I respect that you have an opinion and opt to interact your post even if I disagree with one sided Fyozai takes. Ultimately, information is more important than my view on such matters. I personally don't see any romantic substance between Dazai and Chuuya for example, similar to your one sided Fyozai take. Asagiri implied recently Skk too much screentime due to the fans. I had noticed a while back portions of Fyozai moments were chopped from the screen. This tid bit floating around is connected to Kunizai as Asagiri wished to flesh out some Kunizai but BSD has an overwhelming amount of fans that push for Skk (you'll find it on Tumblr. I do not know the full details. I have to investigate the Fyozai exploration + Kunizai claims. But usually, Asagiri does say things that shocks fans to their core if they aren't familiar with his views. Like Dazai feelings human with Oda and Fyodor. My favorite of all time. Though I look forward to other insight in the future! More on Dazai himself).

// In any case, my sincerest apologies if I disturbed you in any manner / trespassed your boundary. I know it can be invasive and even unpleasant (if this was a DNI of yours). Tumblr is known for safe spaces (but I am aware not always) more so than other mainstream platforms. I wish to adhere to that and not drag onto your zone. I probably should've just rewrote the quote but not reblog you, in the case that I had any subject pertaining to a DNI of yours. Empathy is one of the few times information is secondary. Hope your day/night is well, fellow netizen.

A neat little detail I like about Mori and Dazai that helps show just how much Dazai did NOT get his behavior from Mori is the type of people they prefer

Mori seems to prefer people he can't easily manipulate and is somewhat close to his level like Fukuzawa, Kouyou, and Dazai himself and is indiferent/dismissive of naive people that can be easily manipulated while Dazai seems prefer naive people that he can easily screw with like Chuuya, Kunikida, and Sigma and expresses a certain dislike to other manipulative people in his level like Fyodor and Mori himself (I couldn't think of any other examples but I think you can see the image)

What does this say about them? No idea. But does help fight the "Mori manipulated Dazai into being the way he is" allegations lol, he is just an asshole by nature stop giving Mori all the credit!!

This might be a little of a stretch and not even intended but I like this little parallel

[ichijokaoru]

It's cute to see Kuuga cast members reuniting for the exhibition!

[pineapplefulfillseveryneed]

Sparks tour 2023

[iknowwhereyousleepatnight]

The secret to good school is good funding. One day, I dream of a world where all schools have options for their children. Personally, I think it's pretty important for that sort of thing to start out early. See if you're actually into that think BEFORE you're 100k in debt and hating your life.

My area has some awesome architecture. One time, I wanted to do a project on it, and my teacher said it was too complicated. I cried, like genuinely left that class, found a place to sit down, and just cried. The buildings were pretty, and I wanted to talk about them. I really do love the amount of thought put into those buildings. The people who made them are dead, but their art is still there. A bunch of dudes 100 years ago sat down and designed this theater. Then more came in and built it. And here I am, sitting there.

Architecture is so awesome in the way that it's interactive. It can survive longer than any human.

definitely!! being able to explore interests before you gotta choose one for your career is soso important i rlly wish i got to try out some more shit before i had to settle on smth

also sameee my city has a lot of old architecture (especially my school. some of the buildings are falling apart but they're very old and very pretty) and im like just in awe of it like architecture is an art but it's more than an art because unlike a lot of art it's not just something to look at it's somewhere someone lives or works or goes with friends and makes memories like a lot of art doesnt have a practical function but architecture does and it serves as a setting for so much of people's lives and that's really impactful and so awesome because there's architecture everywhere and it's all so beautiful *dreamy sigh*

also sucks that ur teacher sucked i hate when teachers/profs won't let you do projects on what ur passionate abt like passion is the basis of learning why aren't u supporting that....

[fightwing]

🥹

[seventeendeer]

as a fat person who's always clamoring for more interesting fat characters in media, I honestly think one of my all-time favorite depictions of a fat character is Jumba from the original Lilo and Stitch - both visually and personality wise

from a design perspective, even though he's an alien, he has so many little anatomy quirks that make him a more believable fat character than many fat human designs in other media. I love the realistic sag and layering of the fat on his arms, the lack of neck definition, the rim of chub around his face and upper back, the way his back is rounded. his clothes pull taut and pinch in anatomically accurate places (e.g. shoulders are firmer = smoother outlines, the sides and back are squishier = bumpier outlines).

and he's stylized so well! all these great details boiled down to some simple shapes and pen strokes. IMO the Lilo and Stitch art style is extremely appealing - it's warm and clean and visually pleasing, but every character is super unique. Jumba isn't supposed to be pretty, but even though he's a very large, very fat, bald older guy who spends most of the movie in crop tops, the way he's stylized and staged makes it clear the audience is supposed to find him interesting to look at, and variably intimidating/cool/powerful/capable. he's often funny, but the physical aspect of his comedy is derived from being so hefty the other characters struggle to prevent him from barreling ahead and doing whatever he wants; being fat makes him come off more in control of the funny situations he gets into, not less. also, because the art style is what it is, a lot of his character acting also just makes him look kind of cute ... though that's universal across the cast

I also really like the fact that his size clearly gives him both realistic advantages and realistic disadvantages. along with having a stronger sense of agency in the comedic scenes, his size in combination with his impulsivity also makes him a more intimidating antagonist. you never know what he's going to do, and his size makes it difficult for other characters to stop him when he's made up his mind. at the same time, it seems to take him longer to catch his breath, he sometimes grunts when moving around a lot to imply it takes more effort, and he clearly struggled to find clothes that fit him when putting together his disguise. I think it's awesome that the character's size impacts how he interacts with the world so much, and again, in relatable ways

and personality wise, it is ALWAYS great to see fat characters portrayed as intelligent - not only is Jumba an accomplished scientist, he's also crafty and witty! a few quiet scenes imply a philosophical side, as he ponders on Stitch's existence and feelings as a living weapon. with Stitch explicitly being made in his own image to an extent, I'd argue there's even room to interpret some of the things he says about Stitch being hints to how he sees himself; we never learn much about Jumba's past, but it's clear he's a social misfit and strongly defiant. I don't think it's a stretch to assume some of what he said to Stitch about being a monster who can never belong anywhere was intended to read as projection (which makes it all the more heartwarming when both of them find a place to belong on Earth)

it's also a nice twist that toward the end, Jumba is the one who is unexpectedly compassionate toward Nani, while Pleakley tries to urge him to ignore her. again alluding to a level of emotional depth and intelligence that is often missing from even well-intentioned depictions of fat people. his character isn't even fully explored, and yet he's one of the most dynamic and interesting supporting characters in a movie full of fantastic characters. the audience is expected to find him fascinating and even sort of mysterious, and he is!

the sequels and spinoffs were more merchandise-driven franchise fluff for kids than the artsy direction of the original movie, but even so, I remember Jumba went on to become Lilo's lovable, amoral uncle figure, which I also thought was so fun as a kid. I love that they committed to the fact that he was more caring and compassionate than he seemed. not only was he a cool evil mad scientist character, but he was also eventually ... a friend ...

and he was even gay

[hotroadkill]

today 2 years ago i was in america and i had the worst hangover of my life and i was in a waffle house with my friend in awkward silence bc we’d fought in a stranger’s kitchen the night before and the server refilled my water for the 5th time while i fought to swallow half a forkful of hashbrowns and she said “i know that look, y’all had a good time at the superbowl last night” and i was thinking actually we had a mediocre time at a nerd bar where u throw darts and all the drinks r named weird things and anyway my friend gives the fakest laugh ive ever heard followed by “yep we sure did” like are we in a CW show right now what was that line delivery and also what even is the superbowl i was born here and should know but honestly i’ve always just pictured everyone gathering at a comically large bowl of cereal but her nametag says leslie and she’s really nice and she’s refilling my water for the 6th time so yeah sure whatever i’m a red blooded american i’ll be anything for leslie in this moment and she tells us stories about working at bars downtown and my friend tells me bad jokes and i feel a little better even though my heart is kind of withering away because my flight is in 17 hours and theres not enough time never enough time i won’t see him for another year and a half and i won’t ever see leslie again and if i ever run into the italian stranger who fell in love with me over darts then it won’t be the same because we won’t be dancing and i’m sitting in a waffle house while the sun sets and i’m sweating gin and tequila and my flight is in 16 hours and i have so many goodbyes to say in this

city because when i was fifteen somebody threw my glass heart onto the floor of my childhood house and bits of it shattered everywhere and fell into the cracks of the floorboards and behind the fridge and i’ll never ever get them out much less back together but i feel like ive been trying for eight years all the same and my flight is in 15 hours but maybe if my friend brings me home now i can spend three of those looking for more shards even though i’ll cut my hand because time never wore down any of the hurt because time might heal wounds but it cant really do jack shit about a metaphysical glass shard its still gonna make me bleed and my friend brings me home and we curl up beside each other in my childhood bedroom thats too small for us it was really a supply room but it became my bedroom when i was eleven and i painted it blue and put up stickers of fish and never took them down but someone someday will take them down and hopefully the house burns to the ground before anyone can touch them theyre mine i grew up here theyre mine dont touch them dont please dont please please please i grew up here and my flight is in 12 hours now because i fell asleep beside my friend and he let me because he knew i needed it he kept watch even though we dont have time we never do because he has to go now and all i can give him is a hug and my hoodie to keep safe until i can see him again and fight him in a stranger’s kitchen again and the sun is gone now and i go and i sit with my dad and my flight is in 10 hours and im trying

not to cry im trying to stare at the stickers because maybe if i look at all of it hard enough i’ll get to stay but i dont because thats not how it works and now my flight is in 4 hours because i fell asleep in my childhood loft bed and now i have to leave i have to pack up and go for the fifth time and it never never gets easier and i know i only have a few more trips left until someone takes my stickers down and paints over my ocean but for now my best friend’s stepmother comes with me and my dad to the airport because my best friend is in college two states away and my flight is in 3 hours and i cry i cry so much and she cries too because she loves me and i think it is such a beautiful blessed thing that i am so loved but oh it is so painful too because i spend more time in its absence than its presence and my flight is in 2 hours and i have to go and my dad is waving goodbye and i see it because i looked back because im stupid i always look back i never look forward i’m forever walking blind through my life because i’m looking back and i can tell my dad is crying and now i have to go through TSA sobbing and it’s awkward because they ask are you okay kid and im not but i cant tell them sorry its just that when i was fifteen somebody threw my glass heart onto the floor of my childhood house and bits of it shattered everywhere and fell into the cracks of the floorboards and behind the fridge and i’ll never ever get them out i cant tell them that so i nod yes im okay and i go and my flight is in 1 hour and i hope it fucking crashes and my flight is in the air and im so far away from all those shards on the kitchen floor now but they’re hurting me all the same and i think i look kind of insane sobbing in the middle seat but how can i miss so many people and so many rooms at once and not lose my mind a little bit? i was going to tell you a short witty little joke about the time i realized i was 21 and didnt know what the superbowl was but i think i slipped on a shard. i’m sorry. maybe next time i’ll get it right. maybe in another two years. maybe you’ll never see me again. maybe this is all the time we had.

[telephoniii]

REALLY…HIM?

☆彡 in which professor trein judges your relationship with the NRC boys

NRC boys x Reader (minus Ortho)

Word Counter: 3K

Warnings: Reader is Prefect, Trein is your father figure, established relationship, possible OOC

A/N: life’s getting pretty hectic so i’m sorry if my upload schedule slows down. i hope you enjoy :>

ace trappola

Can’t say he’s surprised, just disappointed. It makes sense; he was one of your first friends. However, that doesn’t make him any less troublesome. Despite being a first-year, Ace is one of the biggest slackers and troublemakers on campus— much to Trein’s dismay. His main worry is that Ace will poorly influence you. He’s already seeing it with the two of you getting a crazy amount of detentions and scoldings for unthinkable reasons. You’ve got it rough already being from another world, you don’t need a devil on your shoulder convincing you to get into all kinds of trouble. It’s a real shame said devil is your boyfriend. He’ll allow the relationship and all will seem swell. Little do you know that he pulled Ace aside and had a long chat.

deuce spade

A fine pick; Trein is neither severely impressed nor disappointed. He doesn’t think Deuce is too bad, but he believes you could do better. Deuce will need to somehow prove himself to Trein. On the outside, Trein looks like he absolutely hates his guts. His eyes are always staring at Deuce with this sharp look and it gets the card soldier real nervous real fast. In reality, it’s just Trein keeping a closer eye on him + his RBF. He’s relatively neutral on the first year, yet Deuce is fully convinced that his professor wants to set him on fire.

cater diamond

Trein is very annoyed with your choice. He doesn’t like Cater’s social media addiction and would much rather have you hit the books than scrolling through Magicam. Not to mention, he feels as though something about Cater’s happy-go-lucky attitude is a facade, and doesn’t trust him around you. Cater finds Trein scary, but he’s not as intimidated as Deuce. As he does with Ace, Trein takes Cater to have a talk, and—surprisingly— his opinions on the third year improve. He doesn’t fully like him, but he’ll tolerate Cater more so than beforehand. Cater also offers to help Trein make a social media account; it’s cute yet chaotic all the same watching them bond.

trey clover

Before Trein can form a solid thought on Trey, the vice housewarden is subtly trying to win his favor. Trey knows how about his father-like connection to you and immediately shapes up. He gifts Trein different pastries and learns which ones he’s partial to. What really wins the professor over is when Trey starts volunteering to help clean his classroom after class. Trein won’t even know the two of you are already together and he’ll make comments around you like, “That Clover boy is real nice…” Needless to say, Trein approves of Trey long before he finds out you both are in a relationship.

riddle rosehearts

Trein immediately scowls when he hears the news of your relationship. You’d think he’d approve due to Riddle’s intellect and dutiful behavior. Admittedly, Trein does like that about Riddle. But he despises the boy’s bursts of anger, finding them childish and unfitting for a future mage. He’s seen the housewarden go berserk on one too many students and doesn’t trust he won’t do the same to you. Trein doesn’t want you walking on eggshells around your own partner. This is another one who’ll have to prove themselves to Trein. Riddle will be upset when he hears of Trein’s low opinion of him, but gets a surge of motivation to convince him otherwise. You’ll find Riddle working even harder on his studies than before you didn’t even think that was possible in hopes of gaining Trein’s favor. He’ll eventually get it. I imagine that Riddle does some small, heroic deed for you that really shows his love, and Trein just so happens to be passing by and sees it. Once your unofficial official father in Twisted Wonderland gets along with Riddle, expect to be nagged about missing assignments and homework a WHOLE LOT.

jack howl

Similar to Trey, he immediately knows about your bond with Trein. Instead of trying to win over the professor, Jack takes a more blunt approach. He goes straight to his desk after class and tells him about your relationship, being upfront about his feelings towards you. Trein respects it. He thinks that Jack has more guts than most on campus and trusts him to protect you. He’s quite supportive of the relationship, acting as a mentor for the both of you. You can catch him watching the two of you with a tiny smile, murmuring something along the lines of, “Young love.” The two of you remind him of his own marriage with his late wife. It makes him sentimental in a way.

ruggie bucchi

A BIG 180 FROM JACK. Trein thinks this guy is sleazy. Ruggie couldn’t care less in the beginning, finding it funny to practically hang off your shoulder while Trein stared daggers into him. Then it started to seep in that it may or may not be important to get Trein’s approval for a long-term relationship with you. That’s when he gets his act together and completely starts sucking up to Trein. He’ll help out with paperwork, errands, cleaning up, etc! All for free! much to his dismay All Ruggie asks for in return is Trein’s support for your relationship. He catches Trein by surprise with how well his work ethic is. The lengths the hyena goes to for you ends up leaving the professor impressed.

leona kingscholar

Professor Trein is both surprised and disappointed. Now how did this happen? He didn't think Kingscholar was capable of being nice to anyone, let alone get into a whole relationship. Well, he bugs you to tell your boyfriend to start showing up to class. He’s not exactly happy with you dating a huge slacker like him, but Trein knows that Leona is a smart boy. Brash and not his first pick, sure, but he wouldn’t play with your heart or rope you into anything stupid. He trusts Kingscholar to protect you. But if he starts seeing you begin to skip class— which is going to happen, Leona’s going to make you do it at least once— he’ll pull YOU aside and give you an earful. Tough love, unfortunately.

floyd leech

Hell no. All the red blaring flags. Now why would you go and do that? Really? Out of EVERYONE? You bet your bottoms Trein is actively speaking out against your relationship every single time he sees you. He doesn't even want to try to talk to Floyd. Trein is convinced you are addicted to getting in trouble and lets out the biggest old man sigh. Is there any way Floyd can win the professor’s favor? Probably not. And if there was a way, would Floyd even do it? Big fat no. Floyd thinks it is hilarious that Professor Trein disapproves, upping his affections around him with that toothy grin of his. And if you guys have a class together that Trein teaches? Chaos. Expect a lot of paper balls to be thrown at you.

jade leech

“Are you okay??” Is the first thing Trein asks when you tell him you and Jade are in a relationship. Doesn't exactly trust the boy, but Jade tends to behave around him. The professor has always seen him being picture-perfect whenever he’s around which is 100% suspicious, but Trein doesn't have any solid reasons to disapprove. Jade, like his brother, finds the whole situation very amusing. He’s always figuring out new ways to appear like the ‘ideal boyfriend’ to Trein. If he ever talks to the professor he’ll slip in a comment like, “I never disappoint, trust me” and it makes Trein distrust him even more.

azul ashengrotto

Now what bet did you lose for this to have happened? At least Ashengrotto is a star student, you need to hang out around more of those in his opinion. After confirming that, “No, no bet was lost,” and “No, he’s not paying for my love,” Trein was pretty alright with it. The Monstro Lounge is a student-ran organization, it's clear from that the young boy is capable and responsible. He just keeps a very, very close eye on you two. The last thing Trein wants is for Azul to take advantage of you since— knowing him— he seems like the type to do so. Expect frequent questions of “How’s your relationship going?” and “He’s treating you right, right?” Azul is going to get asked to stay after class to talk. Trein then proceeds to threaten lecture him on how to properly treat your lover. He just wants to make sure you don't get wrapped up in one of those contracts he’s heard about. Azul has quite the track record.

kalim al asim

Automatically assumes you’re dating him for the money and begins to ramble about how you should marry for love. Tells you about his late wife and how much he loved her— it is so sweet I'm actually crying. That's the kind of love he wants you to have. You’ve got to reassure him that, “Yes, my certified father figure, I do love him very much and I’m not just in it for the money.” After that talk, he finds the relationship sweet but kind of concerning. Kalim is a nice boy but severely naive and, frankly, incompetent. Trein starts to go a little harder on Kalim in class, not that he was going easy anyway. He scrutinizes the essays he turns in and chastises him for missing an assignment. As he watches you kiss Kalim on the cheek after getting an A, Trein can only sigh and think, “He’s lucky he’s rich.”

jamil viper

Trein’s pretty okay with him. He’s a level-headed guy with passable grades and the title of a vice housewarden. However, the professor did hear about his Overblot and does think that there's more beneath the surface. He doesn't judge him for his Overblot, no. But Trein does keep a closer eye on him to make sure he isn't scheming anything involving you. The professor also tries to push him to do better academically. He’s heard from you about how smart Jamil truly is and can see his potential, so he tries to get him to stop holding back. Jamil is a little appreciative of it and respects Trein as your father figure, but still isn't a fan of sticking out. Nor does he plan on giving into Trein’s attempts.

epel felmier

Is fine with the relationship at first. He was polite, soft-spoken, and a part of Pomfiore. Most students belonging to that dorm are pompous, but respectful nonetheless. Then Epel’s true nature comes out and Trein is constantly reprimanding him for horseplay. It's kinda funny how surprised Trein is by Epel’s country toughness. The professor definitely had his suspicions— nobody at NRC is innocent, he’s learned every student here has some sort of dark side— but he definitely wouldn't have expected this. A part of Trein actually prefers him like this. You are dating someone with a backbone who will defend you. He encourages Epel to be himself around him, promising a judgment-free area. They get along pretty well surprisingly, with Trein being a sort of mentor to him. Overall, very sweet and Trein approves.

rook hunt

In the most blunt way possible, Trein tells you, “Your boyfriend weirds me out.” He thinks Rook is an oddball for sure. No way around it. Is half convinced Rook is stalking him. Because he is. When you explained to your boyfriend about the bond you had with Professor Trein, he got way too intrigued and ended up ‘watching’ Trein like he does to Leona. It's not until the professor makes a passing comment about being paranoid that he’s being watched that you realized, “Oh shit my boyfriends stalking you.” You don't say that to him— you don't want Rook getting in trouble. So you settle on having a really long talk with Rook about it who reassures you he’d never disturb your father figure or the absolutely beautiful bond between the two of you. He still worries you sometimes when he goes missing and randomly reappears by walking out of Trein’s classroom.

vil schoenheit

Trein worries that Vil won’t make the time for you. He’s aware that Schoenheit is a busy boy as he’s missed his class plentiful in the past. He’ll make Vil stay after class for a little to talk to him about it, giving him a fatherly warning about being ready to fully commit to a relationship and the time it takes to manage one. Vil is, admittedly, insulted that Trein doubts his ability to wholeheartedly love you but takes it in stride. He sees this as a sign to up his game in the romance department and properly does so, dedicating more time to pampering you. The professor expresses his concerns to his coworker, Crewel, who talks his ear off about how much of a “good pup” Vil is and that he won't disappoint. Trein can’t help but agree when he spots you walking into class looking more freshened with slight makeup on and a new hair-do that Vil definitely did for you.

idia shroud

Once you break the news to Trein, he immediately asks to meet with Idia one-on-one. The blue-haired student rarely shows up to class! And that iPad isn't going to cut it forever! He needs to be able to size him up in person. Idia, naturally, is scared to death. At first, he immediately declines, insisting that they don't really need to meet up, the whole idea is stupid, and it’ll be fine if he stays right there in his room. Then you sit down with him and tell him how important Trein is to you and… sigh You landed a natural 20 on the dice of persuasion. Idia can’t believe he's doing this. You’re beside him the whole time as he stutters in front of Trein. Is Trein impressed? No, not at all. Yet your confidence in the Shroud and constant praise is reassuring. The professor’s going to make you force Idia into showing up in person in class. His attendance rivals Leona's.

sebek zigvolt

Doesn't really care for Sebek despite the first year's desperate attempts at trying to impress him. Sebek lost him after he started talking about Malleus when Trein asked about you. Ever since then, it’s just been him trying to win him back to no prevail. Kinda sad to watch. He’ll be the biggest gentleman ever: rushing to doors to open them for Trein, scrubbing his whole classroom for him from top to bottom, and yelling at other students to be quiet— though he was pretty much doing that before you two even got together. But every time Sebek gets close to winning the professor’s favor, he ends up going on a tangent about how amazing his liege is, and we're back at square one. You’ve got to rub him on the back and kiss him on the cheek while telling him, “Trein will come around one day!” Even if that day never comes.

silver

Not a fan. He’s witnessed Silver fall asleep in his class one too many times and thinks it's disrespectful. Once you tell Silver, he’s upset as it's not exactly something he can change, but will put in extra effort not only in Trein’s class but in all his classes. He studies with you beside him so you can prevent him from falling asleep when you see him get all drowsy-eyed. Trein immediately takes note of Silver’s hard work and grit as the boy passes his class with flying colors while asking if there’s anything he could do to help him after hours. It's only when he hears from his fellow teachers that Silver has been doing exceptionally well is he actually impressed. Afterwards, Trein will start being more understanding of Silver’s constant sleeping. He won't be any less strict, but he won’t lay into him for it as hard as before since learning it's out of Silver’s control. Trein thinks rather positively of your relationship, comparing it to the ones in the fairytales.

lilia vanrouge

A bit disturbed, to say the least. Lilia is older than him after all. Trein tried to keep a close eye on the two of you, but Lilia always caught him and pursued a staring match. Trein was always the first to look away. Lilia finds it entertaining. He tries to play tiny tricks on the professor, but you stop him at the very last minute. You sit down and try to explain that you deeply care about Trein and, by extension, what Trein thinks of him. Lilia proceeded to suggest that he brings Trein some cookies to win him over to which you immediately say no. Honestly, I don’t see Trein really ever warming up to Lilia. He just pretends the old bat doesn't exist and isn't your boyfriend. Lilia finds that incredibly funny while you're dying inside.

malleus draconia

The fact you were able to get close to the Draconia is an impressive feat to Trein. However, future ruler of Briar Valley or not, he intends to make sure that Malleus treats you right. Right when you tell Malleus that Trein is basically your father, the fae goes straight to the professor, confesses to him about your relationship, and swears to take good care of you with this ominous tone. Trein isn’t very fond of Malleus at first, struggling to decipher whether or not that introduction was genuine. It isn't until you go to him after class, gushing about the late-night walk you went on with Malleus yesterday and shoving cute little polaroid photos in his face does Trein begin to trust the fae. He makes sure to scold you for not being asleep at that time, yes, but he stares at one of the photographs for way too long, imagining you and Malleus as him and his late wife for a moment. A small smile appears on his face. However, he can’t help but think that the two of you are down a similar path; the happiest marriage ever, kids, and one lover outliving the other. A tragedy, but he’ll let you enjoy it while it lasts just like he did. As long as you’re happy.

[beloveds-embrace]

Imagine 141 moving into a quaint little town post retirement and you’re the only baker in town. You love making sweets, breads, and desserts and own a cute bakery to show for it, know everyone in your town so these four new men who come early morning to try your breakfast deal immediately excite you because- new perspectives and tastes and opinions! It’s become a habit of yours to share bites of whatever new item you plan on adding to the menu, so the more diverse opinions the merrier in your opinion.

And you are glad you didn’t let their demeanor- big gruff men, especially the one with the black surgical mask- scare you away because they are sooo nice, calling you sweetheart, doll, birdie, and bonnie. So many nicknames, it has you blushing the sweetest pink shade. And they are all too happy to help taste-test for you, giving you lots of praise.

(Though you never quite notice their immense disappointment at seeing the little ring on your finger.)

Still, at the very least one of them comes over to your bakery once a day. Sometimes they come together, sometimes only two of them- but they come anyways and tip you every time despite you insisting otherwise. It’s a lovely friendship you build with them. But they do note you never mention your partner much.

Until Simon drops by one day, intent on buying one of your apple pies and maybe fluster you enough to turn the same shade as an apple, and he sees the bruises that peek out just so from your sleeves and the collar of your outfit. Puffy eyes, more makeup than usual, your smile not quite there…

And he understands. He knows this all-too-well. And the fact that it’s happening to an embodiment of sunshine like you? Unfair. Unbelievable. Unacceptable.

Simon gently takes your hands, squeezing them so lightly. “Everything’ll be well, luvie. Promise.” And that’s all he says.

And maybe it’s cruel of you to be happy when you receive a call a few days later, the sherrif of the town telling you your husband was found mauled to death by one of the bears that roam around the woods occasionally, but you just… don’t care.

A week later, when it seems appropriate enough, you open up the bakery again and your smile is blinding as you greet the 141 men and tell them for today, everything’s for free.

part 2

Other works + help me choose a title for this 😩