#pls i just need 1 (one) person to understand the reference-

[cyanpromise]

"Oh dear, Little Painter."

[sophiamcdougall]

You're a reasonably informed person on the internet. You've experienced things like no longer being able to get files off an old storage device, media you've downloaded suddenly going poof, sites and forums with troves full of people's thoughts and ideas vanishing forever. You've heard of cybercrime. You've read articles about lost media. You have at least a basic understanding that digital data is vulnerable, is what I'm saying. I'm guessing that you're also aware that history is, you know... important? And that it's an ongoing study, requiring ... data about how people live? And that it's not just about stanning celebrities that happen to be dead? Congratulations, you are significantly better-informed than the British government! So they're currently like "Oh hai can we destroy all these historical documents pls? To save money? Because we'll digitise them first so it's fine! That'll be easy, cheap and reliable -- right? These wills from the 1850s will totally be fine for another 170 years as a PNG or whatever, yeah? We didn't need to do an impact assesment about this because it's clearly win-win! We'd keep the physical wills of Famous People™ though because Famous People™ actually matter, unlike you plebs. We don't think there are any equalities implications about this, either! Also the only examples of Famous People™ we can think of are all white and rich, only one is a woman and she got famous because of the guy she married. Kisses!"

Yes, this is the same Government that's like "Oh no removing a statue of slave trader is erasing history :(" You have, however, until 23 February 2024 to politely inquire of them what the fuck they are smoking. And they will have to publish a summary of the responses they receive. And it will look kind of bad if the feedback is well-argued, informative and overwhelmingly negative and they go ahead and do it anyway. I currently edit documents including responses to consultations like (but significantly less insane) than this one. Responses do actually matter. I would particularly encourage British people/people based in the UK to do this, but as far as I can see it doesn't say you have to be either. If you are, say, a historian or an archivist, or someone who specialises in digital data do say so and draw on your expertise in your answers. This isn't a question of filling out a form. You have to manually compose an email answering the 12 questions in the consultation paper at the link above. I'll put my own answers under the fold. Note -- I never know if I'm being too rude in these sorts of things. You probably shouldn't be ruder than I have been.

Please do not copy and paste any of this: that would defeat the purpose. This isn't a petition, they need to see a range of individual responses. But it may give you a jumping-off point.

Question 1: Should the current law providing for the inspection of wills be preserved?

Yes. Our ability to understand our shared past is a fundamental aspect of our heritage. It is not possible for any authority to know in advance what future insights they are supporting or impeding by their treatment of material evidence. Safeguarding the historical record for future generations should be considered an extremely important duty.

Question 2: Are there any reforms you would suggest to the current law enabling wills to be inspected?

No.

Question 3: Are there any reasons why the High Court should store original paper will documents on a permanent basis, as opposed to just retaining a digitised copy of that material?

Yes. I am amazed that the recent cyber attack on the British Library, which has effectively paralysed it completely, not been sufficient to answer this question for you.  I also refer you to the fate of the Domesday Project. Digital storage is useful and can help more people access information; however, it is also inherently fragile. Malice, accident, or eventual inevitable obsolescence not merely might occur, but absolutely should be expected. It is ludicrously naive and reflects a truly unpardonable ignorance to assume that information preserved only in digital form is somehow inviolable and safe, or that a physical document once digitised, never need be digitised again..At absolute minimum, it should be understood as certain that at least some of any digital-only archive will eventually be permanently lost. It is not remotely implausible that all of it would be. Preserving the physical documents provides a crucial failsafe. It also allows any errors in reproduction -- also inevitable-- to be, eventually, seen and corrected. Note that maintaining, upgrading and replacing digital infrastructure is not free, easy or reliable. Over the long term, risks to the data concerned can only accumulate.

"Unlike the methods for preserving analog documents that have been honed over millennia, there is no deep precedence to look to regarding the management of digital records. As such, the processing, long-term storage, and distribution potential of archival digital data are highly unresolved issues. [..] the more digital data is migrated, translated, and re-compressed into new formats, the more room there is for information to be lost, be it at the microbit-level of preservation. Any failure to contend with the instability of digital storage mediums, hardware obsolescence, and software obsolescence thus meets a terminal end—the definitive loss of information. The common belief that digital data is safe so long as it is backed up according to the 3-2-1 rule (3 copies on 2 different formats with 1 copy saved off site) belies the fact that it is fundamentally unclear how long digital information can or will remain intact. What is certain is that its unique vulnerabilities do become more pertinent with age."  -- James Boyda, On Loss in the 21st Century: Digital Decay and the Archive, Introduction.

Question 4: Do you agree that after a certain time original paper documents (from 1858 onwards) may be destroyed (other than for famous individuals)? Are there any alternatives, involving the public or private sector, you can suggest to their being destroyed?

Absolutely not. And I would have hoped we were past the "great man" theory of history. Firstly, you do not know which figures will still be considered "famous" in the future and which currently obscure individuals may deserve and eventually receive greater attention. I note that of the three figures you mention here as notable enough to have their wills preserved, all are white, the majority are male (the one woman having achieved fame through marriage) and all were wealthy at the time of their death. Any such approach will certainly cull evidence of the lives of women, people of colour and the poor from the historical record, and send a clear message about whose lives you consider worth remembering.

Secondly, the famous and successsful are only a small part of our history. Understanding the realities that shaped our past and continue to mould our present requires evidence of the lives of so-called "ordinary people"!

Did you even speak to any historians before coming up with this idea?

Entrusting the documents to the private sector would be similarly disastrous. What happens when a private company goes bust or decides that preserving this material is no longer profitable? What reasonable person, confronted with our crumbling privatised water infrastructure, would willingly consign any part of our heritage to a similar fate?

Question 5: Do you agree that there is equivalence between paper and digital copies of wills so that the ECA 2000 can be used?

No. And it raises serious questions about the skill and knowledge base within HMCTS and the government that the very basic concepts of data loss and the digital dark age appear to be unknown to you. I also refer you to the Domesday Project.

Question 6: Are there any other matters directly related to the retention of digital or paper wills that are not covered by the proposed exercise of the powers in the ECA 2000 that you consider are necessary?

Destroying the physical documents will always be an unforgivable dereliction of legal and moral duty.

Question 7: If the Government pursues preserving permanently only a digital copy of a will document, should it seek to reform the primary legislation by introducing a Bill or do so under the ECA 2000?

Destroying the physical documents will always be an unforgivable dereliction of legal and moral duty.

Question 8: If the Government moves to digital only copies of original will documents, what do you think the retention period for the original paper wills should be? Please give reasons and state what you believe the minimum retention period should be and whether you consider the Government’s suggestion of 25 years to be reasonable.

There is no good version of this plan. The physical documents should be preserved.

Question 9: Do you agree with the principle that wills of famous people should be preserved in the original paper form for historic interest?

This question betrays deep ignorance of what "historic interest" actually is. The study of history is not simply glorified celebrity gossip. If anything, the physical wills of currently famous people could be considered more expendable as it is likely that their contents are so widely diffused as to be relatively "safe", whereas the wills of so-called "ordinary people" will, especially in aggregate, provide insights that have not yet been explored.

Question 10: Do you have any initial suggestions on the criteria which should be adopted for identifying famous/historic figures whose original paper will document should be preserved permanently?

Abandon this entire lamentable plan. As previously discussed, you do not and cannot know who will be considered "famous" in the future, and fame is a profoundly flawed criterion of historical significance.

Question 11: Do you agree that the Probate Registries should only permanently retain wills and codicils from the documents submitted in support of a probate application? Please explain, if setting out the case for retention of any other documents.

No, all the documents should be preserved indefinitely.

Question 12: Do you agree that we have correctly identified the range and extent of the equalities impacts under each of these proposals set out in this consultation? Please give reasons and supply evidence of further equalities impacts as appropriate.

No. You appear to have neglected equalities impacts entirely. As discussed, in your drive to prioritise "famous people", your plan will certainly prioritise the white, wealthy and mostly the male, as your "Charles Dickens, Charles Darwin and Princess Diana" examples amply indicate. This plan will create a two-tier system where evidence of the lives of the privileged is carefully preserved while information regarding people of colour, women, the working class and other disadvantaged groups is disproportionately abandoned to digital decay and eventual loss. Current and future historians from, or specialising in the history of minority groups will be especially impoverished by this.  

[elliespassagerprincess]

Hello can you write a fic based off of ‘1 step forward and 3 steps back’ by Olivia Rodrigo ? thank you! <3

One Step Forward, Three Steps Back: ellie williams x reader

hi anon! i hope you like it:) I tried something new adding ellies pov.. i hope you dont mind:)

This story is based off the song one step forward, three steps back by olivia rodrigo. If you can, please listen to the song as you're reading:)

Pairing: ellie williams x fem!reader

requests are open, send me your thoughts:)

Warnings: Emotional manipulation, toxic patterns, heartbreak, strong language, emotional dependency, insecurity

Summary: In which your relationship always put you 3 steps back

Masterlist

"You got me fucked up in the head, boy."

You wish you could blame it on the trauma.

On the broken world. On the things she’s seen. The things you’ve seen.

But deep down, you know it’s more than that.

It’s her.

And it’s you.

And it’s this thing you keep calling love just to justify how much it hurts.

You’re sitting on her porch again, arms wrapped around your knees, watching as the sun dips behind the mountains. Her guitar is silent inside. So is she.

You said something wrong today.

You don’t know what, exactly—but her face changed. Her mouth pressed into that tight, unreadable line. She stopped laughing, handed you your coat, and mumbled something about needing to be alone. That was hours ago.

And you’re still here. Because she never told you to leave.

But she didn’t ask you to stay either.

Ellie’s hot and cold. Gentle and cruel. Soft one day, distant the next.

She kisses you like you’re the only thing anchoring her to the earth. Then pushes you away like she can’t stand to be touched.

You never know which version you’re going to get.

It’s always a guessing game.

A test you didn’t sign up for.

A trap she doesn’t even know she’s laying.

And every time you think you’re getting somewhere—one step forward—

She pulls away. Shuts down. Disappears.

Three steps back. Every. Time.

You remember the first time she let her walls down.

It was raining, the kind of cold that seeped through your bones. She had a nightmare and showed up at your door looking half-dead. You held her until she stopped shaking. She cried into your neck. Whispered “Don’t leave.” And you didn’t.

She kissed you like she meant it.

You thought it meant something.

Maybe it did.

Maybe it didn’t.

She never said.

"Do you love me, want me, hate me? Boy, I don’t understand."

Sometimes she calls you “baby.” Soft. Real.

Sometimes she calls you “dude,” or doesn’t say anything at all, just grunts and walks past you like you’re nothing.

It fucks you up.

You lay awake wondering what you did.

You second-guess everything you said, every look, every breath.

You practice conversations in your head, afraid that the wrong word will make her disappear again.

You used to be confident.

You used to be whole.

Now, you flinch when she raises her voice. You smile too quickly when she’s calm. You praise her for the bare minimum just because it means she isn’t angry.

You’re in love with someone who’s only ever half-there.

But god, when she’s there—

She’s everything.

ELLIE'S POV (ellie is refered to as you because its her pov! pls don't get confused. i tried writing it from her perspective lol)

“And maybe in some masochistic way, I kind of find it all exciting...”

You don’t mean to hurt her.

You really don’t.

But something in you breaks every time they get too close. Every time they see too much. Every time they look at you with those eyes full of hope and softness and trust.

You don’t deserve that.

You never did.

You love her. You know you do. But love feels like a leash—tight and terrifying. It means responsibility. It means hurting them, eventually. And you’ve already hurt too many people.

You don’t want to be that person again.

So you push. You pull.

You leave the room when things get too quiet. You snap at them when they ask what’s wrong. You disappear, come back, kiss them like they’re the air you breathe, and then say something that makes them question if any of it was real.

You hate yourself for it. But you don’t stop.

Because part of you—dark and broken and mean—likes the chaos.

At least you know how to survive in chaos. You don’t know how to survive in love.

YOUR POV

“Maybe I’m just not as interesting as the girls you had before.”

You hear her mention Dina in her sleep.

Just once.

A murmur. A sigh.

A name you’ve never asked about but always felt lingering.

You pretend you didn’t hear.

But the silence after that is louder than anything she’s ever said.

You try to leave. You pack your bag. You don’t say goodbye. You make it to the gate.

And she’s there.

Looking at you like she’s drowning. Like you’re the last thing keeping her above the surface.

“I’m sorry,” she says. “I just... I don’t know how to do this.”

You hate how fast you crumble.

You kiss her again. You stay again.

And it’s good. For a while.

Until the next wrong word. The next cold shoulder.

The next time you’re sitting on her porch wondering what the fuck you did wrong.

Because with Ellie Williams, it’s always one step forward... three steps back.

And you never know which one is coming next.

[mikareo]

megumi doing smth pls

⌗ THIRTEEN YEARS ₊ ˖ ་. megumi fushiguro x fem reader (2.6k)

⊹ ⠀⠀ 3 times megumi wants to tell you he loves you, and the 1 time he does.

contains; attack on titan au, marleyan!megumi, eldian!reader, aot spoilers!!! (season 4), forbidden lovers, fluff, angst, kissing, major character death, cannabalism? (titans), annie cameo! author's note; here u get an old draft (psa none of this will make sense if you haven't watched attack on titan!!!!)

i. what is love at first sight

it's almost human instinct; knowing which people are more likely to have good fortune. some are simply born with an advantage— these people having the freedom to walk along the river bank, skip flattened rocks down streams, and laugh with their peers. with families who shop in the market together, hand-in-hand with woven baskets strewn over their shoulders, and all the time in the world to live their lives to the absolute fullest as true freelancers facing the rising sun that sees tomorrow and the day after that and the day after that.

but in the truth of it all...the sun doesn't shine on everyone.

there are countless amounts of souls who aren't as blessed as marleyans like megumi. souls entangled with the devil herself, ymir, a woman who singlehandedly birthed the 'race from hell'...which he's never fully agreed with. everyone he knows refers to eldians as humanity's sin, but it's not their fault their biology is simply different.

humans are humans, right? they've done no wrong by being born. especially the warrior candidate he's been staring at for the past hour from a distance. you can't be that bad. after all, you're beautiful.

okay, yes. he has a little crush. he can't help it! one day, he was minding his own business on a walk home from the lab, when gojo had the bright idea of sneaking a peak at the warrior training. that's when megumi first saw you and his world stopped. sure, you were covered in mud and crawling through trenches with a rifle strapped to your back; but that didn't make him any less awestruck. since then he's hidden himself in the same bush, week after week, just to get a glimpse of your face.

"she's a cutie. you've got good taste." okay, creepy.

megumi rolls his eyes, glancing up at his mentor who's the only person who knows of his little secret. "don't you have women to harass?"

"ouch, sassed by a ten year old. i see how it is." gojo chuckles, ruffling his black hair and crouching down to the younger boy's level. "you see her out there? she's killing it. i heard she's the top contender for the female."

"i hope so." his blue eyes are locked on you, watching as your focused expression turns to determination whilst helping your teammate off the ground. "she'll have a better chance of living that way."

"...and maybe your family will let you meet her."

ugh, his family. since he was six, the zenin's have raised him with their questionable values and ideals. as the leading researchers in the modern world, they've revolutionized how eldians are studied! at least that's what he's been told. to be frank, he doesn't care about the right or wrong battle they've propagandized to the rest of humanity. all he cares about is knowing your name and telling you how pretty your eyes are.

"i want to talk to her, at least once." his voice is quiet, but gojo hears.

"why? you wanna tell her you love her?"

he hates him so much.

"no!" megumi exclaims, pushing back the older man in defense. his cheeks are bright red from embarrassment and he can feel the flames emitting from them. "i just want to be her friend, that's all. why do you always make things so weird?"

it's amusing to gojo how his little friend is so flustered. usually megumi is a shy boy, keeping to himself and avoiding contact with his peers; but whenever the conversation topic is you, he seems to perk up...and gojo loves to tease a lovestruck kid.

"don't worry," he smirks, "you'll understand your feelings when you're older. you don't need to tell her quite yet that you love her."

love you?

"just shut up and let me watch." megumi grumbles, resting his head in his hands as you're jumping up and down after being praised by your captain. he wishes he could make you that happy one day. "it's not love, i'm serious."

he'll understand what love means when he gets older. for now, he'll just imagine confessing.

ii. what is love that is forbidden

you're a lot more annoying than he thought you'd be.

after having been selected as the new female titan, your ego is boasting with energy and won't stop boasting no matter how often megumi tells you to zip it. though he was excited to meet you, his thirteen year old self now wishes you'd give him a moment of peace. instead, you insist on following him around whenever and wherever you can and yapping his ear off with comments on everyone and everything about your day. please, just give him a break.

"uh, fushiguro..."

he sighs with exhaustion. "what?"

"i think i locked us in here."

dammit.

"you forgot the key?" he asks.

"i forgot the key." you confirm.

of course you did.

with an exhausted grumble, megumi settles himself on the cold, cement floor of the supply closet you'll both call home for the next few hours. it's both of your days off, but he'd wanted to prep his supplies for his training on monday; to which you, of course, invited yourself along for the ride. you'll stay out of the way. it's fine, he can just ignore you. that's what he told himself...though, it's impossible for him to ignore you.

it's likely that no one will visit the storage room until the evening time— with most of his colleagues at home with their families, cooking a warm meal with lamb and stew. it's also uncommon for any of the researchers to be in liberio on their off days. megumi's just the special kind that doesn't think he'll be plagued by breathing the same air as eldians.

"mind if i join you?" he knows you're asking a rhetorical question and you know he'd never reject you.

with a small plop, you take a seat next to him. he's used to your warmth by now— considering you to be an essential part of his every day, despite how much he enjoys complaining about you— and leans his head against yours. it's obvious that you're sleepy. though, you never indulge in conversations about your training, megumi is well aware of how overworked you are. he can't imagine fighting in wars at this age, especially wars in which you're fourteen meters tall and smashing through brick walls; which is why he tries his best to be there for you when you need him.

your life is a battlefield and he's the peaceful conclusion.

"you know..." the sound of your voice is faint, a great contrast to your usual noise and megumi can tell something is wrong. "when they find us here, they're going to think i kidnapped you."

"i mean what else would the zenin heir be doing with a titan shifter?" you start to choke on your words and he instinctively wraps his arms around you. "you don't need to comfort me, fushiguro. we both know i'm going to be punished after this. you can't apologize and make everything okay like usual."

to your surprise, his pointer finger touches your cheek and gently wipes away your running tears. "...fushiguro—"

"it won't always be like this." he interrupts you, cupping your face as if you're a rare gem that he can't afford breaking. "when i'm in charge, i'm going to change things. you won't have to do this anymore. i won't let them do this to you anymore!"

the two of you are a mess on the floor, crying in each others arms, and wishing that the world was a better place. "you still have thirteen years left. please...please keep fighting for me. i promise i'm going to save you."

"fushiguro..."

"call me by my first name."

"...megumi."

you're beautiful. he wants to kiss you so badly, but he knows now isn't the time. he wants to hold your hand in public, but he knows you'll be berated for doing so. he wants to tell you he loves you, but he's too afraid.

megumi fushiguro is a coward.

...but he's a coward in love; and one day, when he's taller and stronger, he's going to be able to tell you that. he's going to be able to protect you.

iii. what is love that is hopeless

"hold still." megumi's voice is soft, his fingers of the same gentle malice as they tend to your open wounds that haven't quite healed yet. with titan steam wafting from the slashes scattering your forearms and shoulders, they blow into his face in a fury of pain. "dammit, i said hold still."

his brings both arms down to your shoulders, heart breaking at the sight of you wincing in retaliation to his force, but carries on. there's no telling what you would've gotten yourself into if he hadn't insisted he care for your wounds; after making it publicly known that he's to be the only researcher allowed within your vicinity after your tireless warrior missions, none of the other researchers even attempt to get near you. he hates how often you put yourself in harms way in order to save your comrades. you're too brave. you've never been just a warrior of marley, but more or less a warrior of all people.

"i've been sitting here for an hour already, megumi." you roll your eyes, swinging your legs over the metal rims and turning to face your very pissed off best friend. "i'm tired and i'd like to get at least an hour of sleep tonight."

his expression is somewhat terrifying. if you didn't know megumi was such a scaredy cat, you'd be intimidated by his reddened cheeks and eyes of fury. it's almost as if he's an inflamed torch held against fluorescent lighting, pasty and saturated in fear and exhaustion. "i need to make sure you're okay."

"well, i have another plane to catch at dawn," you deflect his concerns. "there's some issue i was assigned to when i landed this morning. i guess one of our enemies isn't afraid of titans yet."

"you're not going."

he's firm in his statement. megumi doesn't like how his colleagues take advantage of you and your abilities. they're working you to skin and bones. if they were the ones checking up on you after every battle they'd know so, but they wouldn't treat you with as much care. his only wish in the world is to keep you safe, which he's doing an awful job at as of yet. "i don't want you getting more hurt than you already are."

"as if it matters." you scoff, leaning towards him in an attempt to get him to back off. "i'll just give 'em a little taste of my titan and they'll run away like mice. it's easy, 'gumi. trust me—"

"life isn't a game!" he's furious.

"well mine is!" you're angry as well.

why don't you get it? why can't you just run away with him?

"i only have four years left! four years, megumi! i don't care if i die tomorrow or the day after that or the day after that. i'm going to either way. you don't have that problem. you don't understand."

without warning, his lips are on yours in his best attempt to stop you from spouting all of his fears and worries from your mouth. he doesn't want to hear it. he just wants to pretend none of it is happening, and you're going to be okay. you are going to be okay. he'll make sure of it.

it takes a moment for you to respond until your intertwined in a feverish kiss that sends his medical supplies clanging to the floor— but megumi doesn't care about order, all he cares about now is being as close to you as possible. he's dreamt of this moment for years. what you taste like...feel like...sound like. he knows you're his soulmate. what he doesn't know is why it's taken him so long to kiss you.

but before your connection can move forward and become something more, your touch is gone.

"i'm sorry, i can't do this." there are tears creeping from the corners of your beautiful eyes. "i—"

he calls out your name as your figure dashes out the door, wishing that he was able to confess. he wants to tell you he loves you so badly; except he doesn't have the bravery he needs. with four more years left, megumi has two things on his agenda.

1.) find a way to save you.

2.) tell you he's yours forever.

iv. what is love everlasting

he's finally become a monster like the rest of them.

from the first time he saw you, he told himself he'd be your savior. he made countless promises that he'd find a way for eldians and marleyans to live in peace, that he'd find a way to save you from this shitty war; only to be the very person to lock you in chains, awaiting imminent death as the next female titan will be born.

megumi wanted to be brave. he wanted to stop being such a coward, but some people just aren't capable of changing so much— and what a disappointment that is.

"hey, fushiguro?" when did you stop calling him by his first name? "can you keep a secret?"

he's not supposed to be civil with you. his orders are to chain you up, inject the child, and watch as she devours you; but you're his weakness. he can't resist you. "of course i can."

a smile graces your lips. it's not a smile of happiness or joy...it's one of anguish and pain. "i wish i ran away with you. i should've run away with you. even though we only had four years, we could've been happy."

why are you saying all of this?

now of all times?

you should've told him years ago! you should've let him know your secrets before he let them change him! before he distanced himself from you and became distracted with his work!

"...megumi..."

"yes?" he's desperate to hear you.

"...i don't want to die."

a thought crosses his mind. it's a scene in which two main characters beat all odds and escape the chains and prisons they've faced, running off into the sunset, never to be seen again. this scene has a happy ending, one where there's a small and intimate wedding with no witnesses except the meadow's flowers. he lifts your veil away from your eyes and murmurs sweet nothings as you kiss him to start off your forever. his heart wants that to be true. he wants that to be true. it's too late, though. you have no time left. your thirteen years is up. his thirteen years of knowing you is up. it's time to say goodbye.

"i can't save you." he's struggling to get his words out while maintaining his composure; and your heart breaks as his promise does as well. "i'm sorry."

he's a monster.

you hang your head, nodding and accepting your fate as he makes his way down the stairs. seeing you like that, knowing what your fate is, almost causes megumi to pass out from lightheadedness. he knows he shouldn't be worrying about himself. after all, you're the one who's about to die. he has a whole lifetime to continue living, and your lifetime was a mere twenty-six years.

gently, he takes the newest warriors hands and tells her what he's about to do. the blonde girl nods along to his words, trying her best to ignore your radiating hopelessness as she's about to become the next you; and megumi injects his needle into her neck.

he wants to look away so badly as she grows into a pure titan with eyes locked on your frail body, but he doesn't want it to end like this. there's gotta be something that he can do to help you. anything to save you from this fate; but to no avail, he's powerless. so powerless that the only thing he manages to do is mouth three seemingly meaningless words as he locks eyes with you.

"i love you."

⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⊹₊｡ reblogs are greatly appreciated! ˚₊⊹

[alltheboysandgirlsiloved]

hi❤️! Could u pls give me ur thoughts on this? :

I was thinking abt the whole Yasmina coming out scene with Ben, and I can't stop seeing a subtext on this. Like, why choosing Ben between all the campers👀? And Is it "over reading" the context to say it looks like Ben knows more about coming out than he confess to Yasmina? 😅

I'm asking bc I'm afraid they'll make him straight, ngl. So I'm questioning, do u think we're really over reading on the context? bc no way fandom is the only one seeing queer subtext on this character 😭

I will answer this question in two ways so that everyone can choose their own adventure.

First of all, plot-wise Yaz coming out to Ben first just made sense! Their friendship has been steadily growing and once they overcame their initial hesitation, I think they just clicked as friends. They were different enough to be forced to learn how to understand each other from day one. Whether people agree or not, Ben is simultaneously very strong-minded and awkwardly delicate, very similar to Yaz. He will always speak his mind and at the same time, he is very accepting. I think that this is exactly the type of person Yaz needed back then - someone who would speak their opinion no matter what, would offer support and comfort But at the same time would not try to baby her. Does it make sense? I think that at that moment there was no one other than Ben who could have offered this kind of non-judgemental and honest support (also because most of the other characters were engaged in other drama!!).

It also makes sense considering their conversation in season 4 when Ben thought that Yaz had a crush on him. I mean, it couldn't get any more awkward than this, right? As silly as it sounds, in the end, it probably helped them solidify their friendship on an emotional level. At least, that's how I've always seen that.

Plus! Let's remember that Ben was the last to find out about Brooklynn and Kenji getting together! So, I guess it was fair for him to learn about Yaz's feelings for Sammy first, haha!

Okay, so that was canon, now it's time for my off-screen rambling.

I said it before and I'll say it again: jwcc Ben is absolutely queer-coded. Has been since season 1 and it has nothing to do with his looks but everything to do with the way he interacts with the world and people around him. Sometimes he is cautious, sometimes he is bold; he bites and curls in himself, he is hesitant but hot-headed; the world is a hostile place that requires taming. He likes the safety of his own shell, but once he peeks out of it - he makes the way for himself on his own terms.

I also believe that Ben was initially written as queer-coded, even if he was never meant to end up in a queer relationship (again - speaking about jwcc only). It would also kind of explain Darius and Sammy's reaction in jwct - their surprise when they learned that Ben has a girlfriend. jwcc Ben was queer-coded, his queerness was never commented upon, but it existed nonetheless. You don't have to come out to be queer, and you don't have to come out for others to be vaguely aware of your queerness. If you're any familiar with older tv shows, in which openly queer characters were a rarity, you would notice that a lot of the characters that are currently referred to as "queer-coded" were presented to the audience in a similar way as Ben was presented throughout jwcc. So yes, considering that I really choose to believe that jwcc Ben was queer-coded, I think it also explains why Yaz reached out to him. She knew that he would understand.

Additional notes:

When I say "Ben's gay-ass speech" at least two things come to mind:

1) Ben's iconic quote from season 1 - "And so what if she is asymmetrical? There's nothing wrong with being different, or bumpy," – don't argue with me "but he was talking about Bumpy" yeah, so? He was talking about "others being different", it's obvious that it's meant to resonate with more issues than just Bumpy's, well, bump

2) His conversation with Yaz when he openly said that he was "just now starting to find himself", self-discovery, figuring yourself out, sounds familiar? yeah.

I also have a whole theory (while I don't believe that the writers intended to write it as such I sometimes think about it) about Ben's entire character arc in jwcc being a metaphor for what it's like to grow up as a queer kid:

Stage one (season 1) - being in a closet, being really cautious about things you show interest in (pre-monorail Ben)

Stage two (seasons 1/2) - experiencing an event/trauma that makes you come out of a closet; as a result, your perception of the world changes and you completely redesign yourself (the "wild child" Ben era)

Stage three (season 3) - gaining courage, making statements, being bold about your choices (Ben intending to stay on the Isla Nublar)

Stage four (season 4) - understanding that just because a part of you is out, doesn't mean that you have to abandon your past self (Ben "figuring himself out", changing the habits he gained during stage two)

Stage five (season 5) - accepting yourself for who you are - queerness and everything that comes with the entire concept of you (Ben becomes a mixture of a jungle boy and that boy from season 1, these personalities merge seamlessly)

This particular interpretation is definitely me over-reading but this metaphor always worked for me, I really like it, mostly because it also reflects a bit of my own experience as a queer kid.

Hope that I answered your question anon :D

[meraki-yao]

Now I'm curious to know all the "candies" between Nick and Tay 👀 lol I don't ship them but I also find it interesting that some fans really ship real people together and gather evidence or proof of it. If its fine with you to share it pls do 🙏 but if not its also fine :)

Huh...

Actually, sure! I kinda wanted to share some of these at times but again I understand that rps is a complicated subject.

A couple of quick prefaces though:

1, If you’re uncomfortable with the subject, again, please don’t read under the post

2, I don’t have all the candies because I really just view them in passing, so I’m just gonna write/translate the ones I’ve seen, remember and find at least a logical speculation

3, I need to reiterate this in case my position in this gets misunderstood: Me writing about “candies” isn’t because these are MY opinion or things *I* found or *I* believe in them being evidence. I am just a translator and messenger.

4, (this one is gonna sound a little academic lol) Two things I realized when thinking about this “candy eating” culture is that Chinese people have a very difference understanding of platonic/romantic affection/relationships with the Western world, and that they look at the candies with rose-tinted glass. Chinese/Asian people are generally a lot less affectionate with their personal relationships, for example friends wouldn’t say “love you” to each other if they’re just friends, nor would they expand their friend group to the others easily or other stuff. And these people who look for candy go into their “investigation” already with the belief that “they are together”, everything remotely resembling a close relationship will automatically be interpreted as romantic. I thought about it a lot, and honestly among the “candies” I’ve seen, most of them are a matter of interpretation: yes those are things couples will do, but it wouldn’t be weird if friends did it too. So they’re not that seriously or up for further speculation. There is I think only one “candy” that I can’t quite say the same, which I will explain and elaborate on in this post. 

5, Please remember that the people who do this do it in good nature: something I didn’t make clear in my post yesterday, which is on me, is that the fans do want them to be together, but they’re not like… yandere level or something. If they’re just friends the fans won’t be upset or betrayed or anything, they just prefer to see them as romantic. They don’t mean any harm, and they don’t cause any harm because China is physically and digitally too far away for them to actually fuck shit up, and they understand the lines of parasocial relationships: those who met with Taylor during his China trip in December know to, and didn’t bring up this in front of him. They know where to draw the line, and whoever doesn’t and starts becoming a problem gets kicked out of the community. This is meant for fun.

6, Ok Future Meraki here, turns out, there’s a lot to translate, a lot more than I anticipated Jesus Christ and I do want to get this post how within today and make it a reasonable length, so I’m just gonna do two events and the one that I mentioned in 4. If yall want a part 2 let me know.

Ok with that being said, the main event under the cut:

In December they made a whole article about “candies” from December, and to quickly summarise (again noted that all of this is speculation, I didn’t and can’t fact check them, and I’m just a translator) (also this ended up way longer than I anticipated so for photo reference if you can please go to the link of the original article):

Academy Gala:

Nick and Taylor both attended the gala: Since the strike ended up to that point, the two times Nick attends a public event, Taylor’s there too (GQ men of the year and Academy Gala), and for both times he’s wearing Cartier’s Tank Must Watch (remember this watch, I’m gonna elaborate on it later because it is the only candy that even I can’t say it’s a matter of interpretation)

In various pictures of the night’s party that other people took, the boys can be seen together in the background

How the photography worked that night was magazine photographers wandered around the venue and randomly found people to take some relatively candid photos: so people who were walking/sitting/in any way sticking together would be photographed together. So best friends and married couples would be photographed together, which is what happened to Meryl Streep, Greta Gerwig, Saoirse Ronan, and Christopher Nolan, Cillian Murphy and their wives. With that logic, Taylor and Nick were caught by the photographer together TWICE, in clearly different places. Later Korean fans (with the same “candy-searching” mindset) read the time on Taylor’s watch in the photos: one was 8:30, one was 9:50. The implication is that they were together for at least that period of time (nearly 1.5 hours)

In both photos of the boys together, Nick’s elbow is…straight up leaning into Taylor's chest. In a photo with Kaia, Nick’s friend and co-star from Bottoms (Brittany), there’s visible space between Nick and Kaia but none between Nick and Taylor (… okay I’m gonna pop in with my own opinion on the latter one real quick: I really think that one is just Nick being a gentleman)  

During that night, Taylor re-posted an Instagram post from July onto Little Red Book: but the things is in the comment section of the original Instagram post, Taylor teasingly pretends to not know Nick; and according to the posting time and the time calculated in 3, Nick would have been watching him post that to Little Red Book.

Nick got a photo with Taylor’s friend Jay Ellis (Jay and Taylor follow each other on Instagram, and Taylor comments under Jay’s post), even though Nick and Jay don’t seem to have any direct connections. Kaia and Taylor started following each other on Instagram after the event.

While other people who got photos with Taylor posted them, in Taylor’s Instagram Post for the night: He only included his photo with Nick, the rest are all solo portraits of himself. Not only that: he edited the background of the photo so it’s just them, and proceeded to put the photo in the middle of the post.

a bunch of Taylor's good friends, including Taylor’s cousin went to like Nick’s post for the academy gala night. Taylor’s sister Ash shared Taylor’s post to her stories: 2 photos of Taylor himself, and the one photo of Taylor and Nick. Taylor mentioned in a past interview if he had any emotional or relationship (I don’t know which one is the right translation, the original wording is 感情) issues, he would talk to Ash. (please note that I didn’t not and don’t know how to fact-check any of the things mentioned above except for Ash’s Instagram)

Conclusion/ Speculation (okay the academy gala part alone took me 40 minutes what the fuck): I cannot reiterate this enough: THIS IS JUST SPECULATION DO NOT TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY but under the assumption that Taylor and Nick are a thing, the serious of shenanigans that happened that night, especially with the family and friends stuff in 6,7,8, was interpreted as they announcing it to their personal social circle. AGAIN THIS IS SPECUALTION DON’T TAKE THIS SERIOSULY 

Taylor’s China Trip

On 7th December, Taylor had a photo shoot at the GQ gala venue, but spent the rest of the afternoon taking photos and signing things for fans. Among those, one was the photo of him and Nick from the academy gala just three days ago. He was visibly extra happy and showed off the photo to the crowd, unlike the other photos which he simply gets it, signs it, and then gives it back.

This day was also the start of “Taylor giving Nick/Henry a moustache”: throughout the trip, he drew on four photos of the two of them

(This one is a … really big stretch) among the four, one of them was the GQ magazine shoot, and he first drew the moustache on Nick’s face, giggling “I’ll sign on Nick’s face”, signed his own signature, then just when he was about to give the magazine back he suddenly changed his mind and said “wait wait I wanna do something on my face”, and then drew a crown on his head while muttering “crown prince”. And the thing is… historically, George Villers had a moustache. And then he drew a moustache on Nick and a crown on himself. Also, one of the most popular Chinese RWRB fic on AO3 is called “The King’s Palace”, and the premise is putting Henry in George place as the social climber and the Duke of Buckingham (it is literally George’s character with blonde hair and a different name), and Alex as the crown prince who ascended to the throne and is also utterly infatuated with Henry. So… yeah.

When he drew the fourth photo, which was the piano scene, the fan who asked said “Oh you’re so nice to Nick!” and according to their description (there’s no video), Taylor blushed a little and said “yeaahhhhh” with a big grin

While Taylor was in China people were stirring shit up on Twitter about him, and during the Twitter drama, Nick liked Taylor’s Academy Gala post.

The boys liked the same video on Instagram but from different accounts (a video about a pony in the snow)

During the trip, Taylor was seen wearing a white button-up with blue stripes. Nick has been seen wearing a shirt that looks identical before.

Cartier Watch (aka the one that makes me do a double take)

Taylor used to wear a lot of Cartier watches until he started wearing Tagheuer last July due to a commercial partnership

Nick likes wearing Omega watches. In fact, Henry’s watch in the movie is Nick’s own omega watch. He also has a commercial partnership with Omega.

But then starting last year, both of them were seen wearing matching Cartier’s Tank Must Watches (the silver on with a black surface and a sapphire crown): Taylor can be seen wearing it in the 5th photos of his September post, while Nick can be seen wearing it during the GQ gala, the Academy Gala, in Milan during fan interactions, and last weekend in his TIOY co-star’s Instagram story.

And the thing about this watch is (and here is where I need to reiterate that I’m just translating, I didn’t fact check this) 1, watch is a typical thing to give a lover, and you must be familiar with their wrist size 2, Cartier is a pretty romantic brand 3, the price of this watch is closer to what Taylor’s used to wearing but much cheaper than Omega 4, This specific watch is a popular watch to give a partner/lover, 5, David and Victoria Beckham’s relationship was discovered because paparazzi saw the Cartier watch he gave her and connected dots together

Jesus Christ at this point I should consider getting a part time job in translation

This was fun but this took me so much time, it’s ~2000 words long

Again, all of this was found and speculate for fun, and mean no ill will, and haven’t, and won’t harm the boys, please understand that and don’t take this took seriously. If you find this interesting and want a part two, let me know.

[smninthisworldd]

- ͙۪۪̥˚┊❛ Babysitter next door ; König x fem!OC ❜┊˚ ͙۪۪̥◌

okay so i know this is short af, but i just needed this chapter to be kind of a prologue, explaining what would happen, and i needed to build up the relationships between characters. i promise it’ll get SO much better (trust me pls)

❝SUMMARY: König is a busy man, always working… but he must provide for his little daughter, his precious Ella. He cares deeply for her, she’s the most important person in his life. König decides to hire, as a babysitter, the only person he can trust in his neighborhood: Jasmine. He knows she’s busy with college, but he also knows that she won’t let him down, and will take great care of his Ella.❞

❝PAIRINGS AND WARNINGS: König x fem!OC, slow burn kinda, age gap (König is older than the OC), little bit of angst & fluff, friends to ?, growing feelings for each other. LATER ON: NSFW. I’ll put more details on the NSFW chapter.❞

w.c: 1720 ; part 1/?

MASTERLIST NEXT CHAPTER

A knock on the door at 10pm wasn’t really usual for Jasmine. She lived alone in a small apartment, the only one she could afford due to her poor job at the cafe down the street. She needed it, though, to afford college.

She moved in her apartment two months ago, and immediately made it hers: it was Jasmine’s now, a cozy and welcoming place, just like her warm and kind personality.

And, two months ago, she met her closest neighbors: König and his daughter, Ella. Jasmine bonded quite immediately with them, and Ella seemed to like her a lot.

Jasmine was studying when she had to stand up from the table and reach the door. She had her hair tied up in a messy bun, her glasses on the bridge of her nose, and wore an old oversized t-shirt. She opened the door, and to her surprise…

«König!» she smiled, quite surprised to see him. Jasmine could tell he just got home from work: he was still wearing his military camo pants and a tight black t-shirt. He probably had time just to take off his vest and his mask, and his hair looked a bit messy, while his face and arms were slightly covered in dirt. «How are you?»

The corners of König’s lips curled into a slight and soft smile, given Jasmine’s kindness. «I’m okay, Jasmine. Can i come in?» he asked, his voice calm and deep as his gaze fell on her body. He looked at her up and down, taking in her pretty appearance, though messy and drained from all her studying.

Jasmine nodded, moving to the side to let König in. His boots made some loud thuds at every step he took, while Jasmine closed the door and turned to him. «Sorry for the mess…» she chuckled lightly, referring to her laptop and her books all over the table.

«You were studying, I see.» König smiled reassuringly. «Don’t worry.»

He kept looking at her for a bit, admiring her messy hair and noticing how her glasses complimented her eyes.

Jasmine looked at him curiously, taking notice that he wasn’t with his daughter. «Where’s Ella?» she asked softly.

«She’s… with her mom.» König answered, a bit hesitantly, his smile dropping and his voice turning a bit more serious. «I’ll pick her up tomorrow.»

Jasmine knew that Ella’s parents weren’t together anymore, but she never asked what happened, or why. She respected their privacy. «Oh, I understand.»

«Speaking of Ella, I wanted to ask you a favor…»

König’s words took Jas by surprise, not expecting that. «Sure. What is it?»

«You know I’m busy with work… and I have a very important mission this weekend.» König explained. «I know you’re very busy, too… but I was wondering if you could babysit her this weekend?» he asked. «I will obviously return the favor.»

«Oh, no need for that!» Jasmine interrupted him. «I will gladly stay with Ella.»

König sighed of relief, smiling at the young girl in front of him. «Thanks, Jas. It means a lot to me.»

Jasmine smiled warmly at him, and listened as König spoke to her: «Since I’ll be out for two days, you can sleep at my place. I’d feel better if you did, so Ella won’t be alone. You can sleep in my room.»

As he mentioned his room, Jasmine raised her brows in surprise. Yes, they knew each other, they were neighbors and friends… but it took Jas by surprise that he was giving her permission to sleep in his room. In his bed.

«Ella usually goes to sleep around 9:30 pm, you shouldn’t have problems with that.» he added. «She likes Disney movies, playing dolls, her favorite color is purple… but i think you know how to deal with it.» he joked.

Jasmine chuckled, «She’ll be in good hands, I promise.»

«I know that.» König smiled. «I’ll text you tomorrow when I’ll bring her here, so you can come see her and I’ll leave for work. Is that okay to you?»

She nodded, smiling warmly.

The next day, Jasmine woke up to a text from König. “Good morning, Jas. Ella’s home, we’ll eat lunch together. Wanna join?”

She gulped in surprise, she wasn’t expecting it. But she obviously accepted.

The outfit she decided to wear consisted of a pretty purple skirt - Ella’s favorite color - and a simple white top. It was quite a hot day of summer, so that outfit was just perfect.

After Jas got dressed, she knocked on König’s door and was welcomed by him wearing some of Ella’s purple hair clips, with flowers and stars adorning his hair.

«Ella wanted me to look pretty because you were joining.» he quickly explained with a straight face.

Jasmine chuckled at the sight of the 39 years old soldier wearing his daughter’s hair clips. How adorable. «You do look pretty.» she joked.

König laughed with her, welcoming Jas in. «I know.» he said, as Jasmine walked in and he couldn’t help but look down toward her skirt, and notice how it exposed those pretty legs of hers.

As soon as Ella saw her, the little girl gasped and ran toward her, hugging her waist tightly. «Hi Jasmine!» she squealed with enthusiasm.

«Hello, princess.» she greeted Ella caressing her hair. Jas then turned to look at König, before looking around to notice the mess in the kitchen. «What were you cooking?»

«Wiener schnitzels. Ella loves them.» he answered, returning to fry the cutlets on the pan. Jasmine knew this type of schnitzel was a traditional Austrian dish, but she’s never ate it. So she was excited to try.

She watched as König cooked the veal cutlets, chatting with his 9 years old girl in the meantime.

But Jas was too focused on looking at him, how the sunlight hit his sharp jawline and cheekbone, his forehead glistening a bit from the sweat of that hot day, despite the air conditioning was on. She watched his expert hands handling the pan and the utensils, the vein on his hands and arms visible and evident.

Jas took a deep breath, shaking those thoughts off her mind, refocusing on her chat with Ella: «…and so I chose to wear the glittery purple dress for my birthday.»

«That’s great, Ella. I’m sure you’ll look like a princess!»

«That’s the theme of the party! Did you forget already?» Ella giggled, thinking Jasmine didn’t hear it or something.

Ella told her already, but Jas was too focused on those thoughts about her dad. She felt guilty in that moment, of her attraction to König. «Right! I’m sorry, Ella, I didn’t hear that.» she chuckled, hiding the truth.

«Lunch’s ready!» König then announced, giving the schnitzel to Ella first, and then to Jasmine.

«Finally!» Ella exclaimed, grabbing fork and knife to cut the schnitzel and eat it. She hummed and closed her eyes when she tasted it, her favorite dish. «Es ist erstaunlich, daddy (it’s amazing, daddy)!»

When Ella spoke German, Jas turned to look at her in surprise, a smile on her face. Given her father’s origins, it was obvious she knew some German. But hearing it was a whole different story!

Jas decided to finally eat her schnitzel, too, and when she did, she had to compliment König as well. It was perfectly cooked, and the veal was delicious. «It’s so good! I’ve never eaten it before!»

König smiled at both of the girls in front of him, feeling proud of himself. «Danke, Mädels (thanks, girls). I’m glad you like it.»

The three of them had a great time having lunch together, chatting and laughing the whole time. Ella’s feisty energy was contagious, and König loved that of his daughter. She was such a happy and sweet girl, and everyone around her felt affected from her positive energy.

As they all ate their meals, it was time for König to go to work. He sighed as he stood up from the table, cleaning up before Jas interrupted him. «Leave it to me.» she smiled, allowing him to properly greet his precious girl.

«Thank you, Jas.» he smiled before walking past her and toward his daughter. He picked her up and she hugged him tightly when she realized he was leaving, closing her eyes.

«Promise you’ll be home soon, Papa?» she whispered, but it was still audible for Jas as well, even though she tried giving them as much privacy as they needed.

«I promise I’ll be back before you know it, Ella.» he reassured her, kissing the top of her head. «Be good for Jasmine, okay?»

His little girl nodded with a soft “Mhm!” added to it. Jasmine smiled hearing that conversation, feeling her heart melt for how sweet König was with Ella, and viceversa.

König then placed a hand on Jasmine’s shoulder, and she turned to look up in his eyes, Ella still in his arms. «Thanks again, Jas. For everything.» he smiled warmly at her. «If you need anything, don’t hesitate to call me.»

Jasmine smiled back at him, nodding at his words and followed him toward the door. He bent to let Ella down, and as he grabbed the keys, she hugged his leg - since he was extremely tall for her - and said: «Ich liebe dich, Papa (i love you, dad).»

«Ich liebe dich auch, Ella (i love you too, Ella).» he replied, caressing her hair and crouching down to kiss her forehead.

Jasmine looked at them with a heartfelt smile, her heart melting for Ella. It must be so difficult for her, she thought, having her dad working as a soldier… But she could tell Ella loved König deeply, and admired him a lot.

As König left, Ella let out a sigh and turned to Jasmine. She grabbed her hand and smiled, looking up in her eyes. After a moment of silence, Ella spoke: «Can we watch Tangled, Jas?» she widened her eyes at the babysitter. «Please?»

Jasmine was taken aback from the sudden change in her demeanor, but it was understandable that she searched for a distraction now. A way to let the time fly, not to think of her dad being away from home.

«Of course.» Jasmine replied with a warm smile, while the two of them walked toward the couch and searched for Disney’s Tangled.

~ smninthisworldd ; please do not copy.

[mochiotomedumplings]

(oshi no ko spoiler - it’s a great anime so pls take caution) some penacony & sunday analysis bcs i was inspired :)

so this all started when i was looking at the hoyoverse website where they posted the penacony albums:

flapper sinthome pt.1:

One's desires must be satisfied through denial, and love means giving something you don't have to someone that doesn't want it.

flapper sinthome pt.2:

In essence, are dreams not a means to pay homage to a lost reality?

i was thinking about what “flapper sinthome” meant bcs it’s such a cool name and i happened to listen to this album a lot even before getting into hsr (yes penacony and sunday was my hsr entry story). to break it down, flapper here probably refers to “sth that flaps” like wings, and sinthome refers to a concept in psychology where (roughly, just my understanding) a person owns/ feels neutral about their behaviour, and they can do things just-because instead of needing a justification. it’s like being true to oneself, which both reflects the penacony vibe of “pleasure, indulging oneself” but also what sunday wanted people to be able to do in his paradise - to freely pursue happiness the way they wanted. it also somewhat reflects ppl’s desire to be free from their constraints, to “flap” their wings like icarus and reach for what they want even if it’s impossible - firefly, aventurine, sunday.

penacony as a place - the sweet dream - was one that appeals most strongly to people most desperate/ hopeless in life, where their desires could not be fulfilled anywhere but a dream/ “denial”. in this context, the “love” here could mean the fake “happiness” of the dream - it would be out of love to give someone solace through a dream, but even the dream maker had no such happiness to give (so it was already doomed) and it was ultimately a dream, never what’s truly wanted. this ofc reminds me of sunday and aventurine bcs they were the two most explored characters of penacony ☺️

white night, a night that never ends - a dream that goes on for as long as ppl choose to escape reality, seeking a “savior” that can’t be anyone but themselves - the conclusion is that we will eventually wake up and could only rely on ourselves, but as immutable as the suffering of reality is people’s struggle against the inevitable. to sleep, to dream is supposedly bcs we fear the inevitable but we’ll continue to “prepare for the end”, “reach for the stars” even if it seemed hopeless.

(yes i love that both of them came to an “end” in penacony and starting sth new after that, despite everything)

so dreams, denial… essentially lies. this was why i was particularly struck during that scene with Ai in oshi no ko episode 1, when mc talked to her on the rooftop about hiding the children. i can’t google the exact phrase on the wiki bcs i don’t want to spoil myself for later episodes, but what she said was to the effect of “love is all lies”. i really like what they did with Ai - the best characters always had something they left behind or conveyed very successfully with their existence - and she was all about love and “lies”. in a way, she was very much the essence of being an idol - the op song titling as such with her at centre stage is so very fitting - that it was all an elaborate lie, the whole industry is like that but so what if it was a lie ? the “idol” exists to love and to be loved by their fans, so the lie is so they could love and be loved by others. out of a desire for love, which Ai had thought impossible for herself. isn’t it so human in the sincerest of ways ?

so this reminded me of sunday, because the “dream” - the utopia sunday wanted to bring to the world - was basically the most elaborate, largest-scale lie there was. it was also penacony, the sweet dream - he wanted to give the most beautiful lie so people could happily live without ever knowing the pain of reality. that’s why it was done out of love - even hoyo said so - it was love that drove him to create that lie/ dream, so the people he loves could be happy. when reality is so painful and a lie can make ppl happy, so what if it was a lie/ dream ?

(of course, different message in each story but this part is similar right ?)

and i thought that was it, interesting similarity that made me think about sunday again. but then oshi hit me with even more sunday references… i didn’t know my sundayism was that bad.

the “obvious” is aqua being protective over his sister, but i’d say the “sibling” relationship is quite different between the two pairs (although they did both accompany their “mother” as she died). what stood out to me though (more like sirens booming in my head) was aqua’s behaviour as described by ruby.

(the parallel is so there ? ruby being more optimistic and sorta moving on from Ai’s death while aqua never really did, being more cautious and cynical & pessimistic. it made me think if sunday was the same - never moving on from his mother’s death)

aqua was noted to have changed - no longer smiling, not telling her what he was doing. at one point we have aqua not wanting ruby to join the industry, wanting to do the revenge by himself. there’s no “revenge” for sunday, but checking sacerdos lore and his own voicelines there’s sunday taking up responsibilities “bcs he’s the older brother” and distancing himself from robin - it was his journal or character story where it was inferred that they had separated from a young age, and seeing how easily he took over robin’s “role” as the chordmaster, sth gopher wood had always known - it’s not hard to assume that he had always done this, taking more on himself possibly bcs it would have given robin more freedom, or that he believed it was just the way things should be. he wouldn’t have involved robin - they had been apart to the point that he couldn’t even get past the cage to say that he likes her songs - and believed in a plan for salvation just as extreme as aqua’s testing password for four years straight. and his biggest reason, one of the 3 most compelling ones he chose to sway his opponents, was his fear over losing robin - sunday being insecure aside, wouldn’t it make sense that the reason it evoked such a big reaction (nightmare over countless nights) was that he was still affected by his mother’s death ? it’s not sth one can really move on from, especially alone.

not smiling, pessimistic & losing hope… aqua really reminded me of sunday that episode. and being really insistent on an extreme plan 🥹

and then somehow that wasn’t the end of it. the episode with akane - it was not hard to predict the way things would turn out, they were already dropping flags by repeating how she wanted to “try harder” (i was surprised tho, you were so cool aqua ? putting together that plan). seeing ppl be pushed to the limit in the entertainment industry is a common theme, but when they talked about how she was “too serious” and it made her all the more affected and cornered by it… doesn’t this sound familiar ?

when she cried as she made herself go back to the criticism because she’d think she deserved it… keeping it from her mother bcs she didn’t want to worry her loved one… i don’t think sunday was pushed to the point of “not wanting to think” like her (maybe when he thought robin died) but if living in the oak family was as harrowing as he had told wonweek aka himself and he had to do it alone, keeping his pains and worries from robin for years… it would have really eroded his spirit (see how he was so different from wonweek). he had gotten so pessimistic, and his position (where he would have felt the suffering of the people he was supposed to care for) as well as his personality (and past experience) (and his dream of paradise) would have made it very difficult to not fall for the temptation of ena’s dream, a “world without suffering”. the more he cared, the more serious he was, all the more he would have cornered himself into enacting the plan for the order (as gopher wood would have predicted).

and he had wanted to punish himself just the same as akane 🫠 just how bad he was feeling that laughter broke him into pieces. at least he was able to find his way back (he would not have come to believe in the order’s plan so much had it not been for gopher wood, see how quickly he realized it once he was defeated) (robin did all that to save her fallen brother 😭 he had made so many mistakes, but in the end, he was still her brother 😭😭 their paths had diverged, a long separation awaited… but they will meet again !!! 😭😭😭).

with how easily robin saw past sunday’s disguise, it’s probably how they’ve been like before separating - sunday thinking too much and robin knowing and loving him for it still, despite their differences. sunday, whose dream was still the one they shared, and robin, who had never forgotten that first stage she sang on, to an audience of one 😭😭😭😭😭

thinking about them made me cry 🥹

almost forgot about this - the thing about “lies being a way to protect oneself”, how akane studied the details as she started acting (she was so cool and became a totally different person) - reminded me of sunday (aven as well). how their life and entire career relied on them putting up a good act, that it was a lot of work to play a role to perfection (and to keep it up all the time too). aven would lie to himself, literally turning into the persona he was playing but sunday would “know” the facade - it’s the cage of his responsibilities, his identities back in penacony after all. that’s why though he’s still formal and serious, his new self feels a lot “lighter” - a bird that’s free of its shackles.

fly free sunday, to the stars 😭🌌

[einsatzzz]

ok! webcomic update! previously, i said that i'm considering on making two chapters before i release it - im scratching that idea off. tho i keep jumping back to do some linearts and a few coloring for parts that i'm sure i won't change, i finally also finished the sketch/mapping as a whole for the whole script draft i wrote for chapter 1.

as i kept on mapping and sketching everything out, especially near the end, i realized that the chapter length is easily at least two times the size of what i initially expected of a standard chapter length??? LMAO so i'm technically already working on two chapters worth of story length all along, it's just that since it's chapter 1 that its longer. if i stack these long pages together, the canvas height would at least be around 115K pixels 🤣😭🤣😭

im so extra for this shit, bc this chapter is just me essentially setting everything up (=planting seeds) and getting a grasp on the webcomic creation workflow & most of the canon characters. but i love being extra for my ocs! ueueueue you will understand when you read it.

this will also be the most i've drawn tsuna and reborn(butter this one's for you 🫵), ever. so besides oc withdrawal, i am also having cute girls withdrawal, the only one keeping me alive in these trying times is my girlie kyoko-chan. if you notice her panels are extra well-done...umm...uhhhh....i love cute girls 🫶🥰✨

my alternative is to just add another segment in the end, as some form of preview on what to expect next chapter. it should be no more than another 7K pixels, it's alr so long, this is nothing at this point 🤣

in terms of art improvement, i must say that they really are not kidding when they say if you keep drawing comics your art will improve. i keep noticing things idk how to draw (=i'll need to study how to) and i'm also being forced to draw characters in angles/poses i was too much of a coward to draw before and also! things i didn't give too many shits about to draw before, including mob characters and backgrounds (that i can't 3d my way out of).

honestly, at some point in the future, i should make a custom brush for namichuu student mobs, because goddamn! it's a pain!

it's also nice that i get to also technically do manga panel redraws by doing this! i find that doing redraws of anime screenshots/manga panels is good practice for how effectively im able to eyeball & figure out poses from references.

lastly for the updated estimate of the release! the latest i could finish it if i really take my time would be by christmas (this would be my og deadline if i had planned to release two standard-length chapters). though, i'd release it earlier if I finish earlier, of course.

and im not rlly beating myself up for not making my own personal deadline, i'll just think about it like this "deadlines are a social construct, its not like i'll lose my irl job for not finishing my personal webcomic 🤣🤣🤣" lmaoosjdfhjsf pls im already so depressed the past few days & im isolating, i don't want to add more to it. and having tunnel vision on the grind to make this is actually a good distraction from nasty thoughts. also took a break today from making it, that's why im able to drop by a few ppl's notifs 🫶

[lillyfics]

Soaring through the Skies || Aemond Targaryen x Reader

Summary: The trials and tribulations in the journey of your love with Aemond.

PLS!!! READ AUTHOR'S NOTE UNTIL " :) " IF YOU DON'T WANT THE ENDING OF THE SERIES TO BE SPOILED!!!

Author's Note: This is literally my first ever fic so don't be too harsh :) The only reason I am writing this fic is that I have read too much Aemond x reader fics where he cheats on with Alys and there is no happy ending for the reader. Like why does every fic I read with that topic just breaks my heart :((( Anyway I decided to write a similar story where the reader gets as close to a happy ending as possible :)

Chapter 1 is a lot of characterization and very little plot :-))

TW: swearing, sexual violence, angst, heartbreak, violence, child death, infidelity, death, references to smut

Chapter 1 (WC: 2159)

His eyes enchant you. After all those years spent at Dragonstone, you thought you would forget what it felt like to be in his presence. But at that moment, when his eyes met yours at the training ground, you felt yourself sucked back into the whirlpool of emotions with an even greater force. Initially, you thought you were the only one whose heart was stuck in a storm, but you later learned that Aemond’s heart was in a similar situation too. During the courting period, he confessed about the love he held for you too. At that time, you felt warmth. You allowed yourself to hope that someone would keep you afloat. But now, you were mortified and nearly ran back to the castle and kept yourself busy under the guise of preparing yourself for the petition. Your sisters kept prodding you about your nerves, but they thought it was just jitters about being back in court. Your father, the rogue prince, was the only one who noticed your unease, but kept silent. There are many things you love about your father, but you believe that his best quality was his ability to understand you. Growing up without a mother, he was your sole guiding lamp in the dark abyss that the world is. But he also didn’t believe in commanding you your every step in life, as he once said “One day you will fly on your own issa tala, and I wouldn’t be able to be there when you are soaring the skies.” He also reminded you that you are the Lady of Runestone and one day you would be a queen in your own right.  Knowing that interrogating you would do no good, he just left you alone to your thoughts and knew that would come to him when in need of help.

With everything that was happening, you couldn’t think Vaemond Velaryon’s petition could get worse, but as every minute grows you are proven wrong. It finally ended when half of his head rolled on the floor, courtesy of your father. This day was a strenuous one, and not just for you. Just when you thought everything was resolved the day has had its fill of surprises, the king commanded a betrothal. A betrothal between you and Aemond. While your eyes were filled with shock, his were…blank. It held nothing. The wedding was to happen in two weeks, in an effort to elongate the period of peace between the green queen and the heir to the iron throne you guess.

Began the courting period, spinning with emotions. You were just learning to spread your wings, you can’t fly yet. Your time had been cut short by a person who did not know you, nor care enough about what you felt and saw you just as a piece in this grand game of cyvasse. You also understand that as piece, you are not one of those that commanded, but one of those that served. Knowing that conflicting with this choice would bring you nothing but trouble, you moved forward to acceptance. This is what it is. A habit your father tried to break you out of. He believed that we are a true pair of father and child in the way we had similar flames stoking us. The way your cunningness seared through you that made you capable of outsmarting your siblings. The way determination gilded you to achieve a task that your mind commands you to. The only flaw of yours is acceptance.

Then the period of courting begins. The fact it is even called that makes your stomach ache with laughter. A courting with no choice you believed to be. During this period, you go through a plethora of phases. After the initial shock to acceptance stage, curiosity won over. Curious about Aemond. You remembered that his eyes were devoid of emotion. Is that how he felt? Nothingness? Just a duty? You think you could live with that. Duty could sprout into comfort and then transform into love. Yet, doubts persisted. What if instead of indifference, he was against the betrothal? Did he have another love? Did he think you weren’t beautiful enough? Did he think you to be timid? You tried to make content with these doubts so that you wouldn’t be troubled in the head. If he had another love, there was no way she could hold up to you, as you are the Lady of Runestone and he, a mere second son. Aemond was anything but ambitious, someone who would seek to increase his standing. The only way his legacy would ever be part of this great game were if his heirs were to be from a powerful woman, and you are anything but not that. After the Queen, the Princess of Dragonstone, and the Lady Jeyne Arryn of the Vale, you were one of the women in power. Or you would be one, in the future. If concern is regarding your beauty, he is more than lucky enough to have you, the entire realm would agree on that as you were deemed a beauty by both Valyrian, First Men, and the Andals’ standards. Your mixture of Royce and Targaryen blood gave you your unique features, sought upon by the entirety of the kingdom much to both your father’s pride and displeasure. On the other side, he was known as the accursed prince with one-eye, deemed scornful to be gazed upon. Yet, you never thought it that way. In your eyes, Aemond was nothing less than one of the most beautiful Valyrian gods to stroll through the realm. Even the juxtaposition of his one violet eye and one sapphire eye entices you. In theory, the mixture of your blood should be blessed with the most gorgeous babes. That is what you once dreamed of, with childish hopes. Now, uncertainty plagues you. You still don’t know how Aemond feels about the betrothal since you have yet to have a conversation with him. Even the queen and the princess are radiating happiness together as they divulge themselves in wedding planning and are genuinely positive regarding this union. Your personal opinion is that this wedding is just their excuse to spend time together. Regardless, Rhaenyra has loved you like her own and Aemond was Alicent’s favourite, so they want nothing but the best for this ceremony. From your brief interaction with Otto Hightower, you learn that even he seems to be in high spirits regarding this union. Why wouldn’t he be? The ambitious man would be joyful about gaining access to the Vale. The only ones that aren’t happy are your siblings and your father, but they have their reasons, and you couldn’t judge them for it. You will also eventually learn that their disappointment is for reasons different than you have in your mind.

As the first week comes to an end, you have your dress, venue, and acquaintance with Helaena, Jaehaerys, Jaehaera, and Maelor in order. Satisfaction fills you, but not enough to completely ease you. In that evening as heirlooms from Runestone finally start arriving, realization strikes you which makes you storm out to the weirwood tree. The stunning colors of the garden would usually calm you, but now nothing stops the quiet sobs that spill out of you. You never liked not knowing the future. You always carved your path. First it was the king, now it was Aemond. Lost in your misery, you sat down with hands covering your knees, staring into nothingness, as teardrops roll down your cheeks. “Are you really that miserable at the prospect of being tied to me?” Not a single whisper escaped your mouth, as you were still in the haze of surprise. You just looked at him. With no answer, Aemond made a choice and decided to take a seat close to you, almost touching you but not. “I thought you were the one who didn’t want to share your life with me”, you tried to say mirthfully, but combined with your doubtfulness it almost came out as a wince. Aemond was staggered by your response. He talked. You talked. He smiled. You smiled. This continued until the sun completely set and only the silent rustles of the leaves and the soft exhales of both of could be heard. You are now hand in hand with him, and everything is eerily calm. The calmness you hope that death would grace you with when its your time. Eventually, you were startled out of your calmness due to a rumble. Aemond looked sheepish and stated that the last meal he had was lunch and he just finished training a few minutes before he saw you by the weirwood tree. Now together, you both enter the dining hall. You also know now everything is fine. Everything will be fine.

In a week, you and Aemond grow closer. Spoke of both of your ambitions, your desires, your wishes. Even before interacting much, you knew Aemond would be a perfect co-ruler when you will eventually move to Runestone in a few years. His knowledge of history and philosophy, his commandeering outlook, and his excellent swordsmanship are qualities that would make him a wonderful consort. Ruling Runestone was something that you were less than confident about. You knew you were a just person, yet you doubted how perfect your capabilities would be. With Aemond by your side, you knew you would enrich the Vale.

As time grew closer to the wedding, you became more comfortable. At your happiness, your siblings also started displaying their happiness. While Lucerys and Rhaena were not a fan of the groom, they were able to understand that I was happy, and that makes them happy too. Even little Aegon and Viserys couldn’t stop beaming at being surrounded by festivities. It seems that everyone in the court were combusting with glee. Well everyone, except Jace and Baela. Their hatred of the groom outweighs the happiness you felt it seems. Aemond didn’t like them either, so you never bothered trying to fix that relationship. Aemond even seems to be more possessive of you in presence of Jace, almost growling when you were seen proximal to Jace. “You don’t know the way he looks at you my love.” You simply ignored the comment, thinking that Aemond’s past grudges were making him paranoid. Once again, you were proven wrong. While you and Jace are having a private conversation in your solar, probably one of your last of these kind of talks until he becomes king it seems. You couldn’t control your smiles as you reminiscent on memories of the past until Jace suddenly leaned across and kissed you. Pin drop silence spread across the chambers until Jace spoke these words “I have fallen in love with you, I am still in love with you, and I know it would be for my best to move on but I don’t think I ever will”. Still, you haven’t uttered a single word, just stared back at him. He eventually leaves the chambers, and unknown to you, that will be the very last conversation you will ever have with each other. You would be left wishing that you said something. Anything really. Anything but the empty silence so that your last memory of him could be filled with something other than guilt and regrets. The evening before the wedding, Baela helps you prepare for the celebratory dinner. Your eyes meet at the mirror. One look into her eyes lets you know that she knows. She also is aware that you know. Guilt racked through you once you realized that she wasn’t even angry with you, she understands. She is aware that she is going to face the condition that you once thought you would be the victim of. Duty instead of love. She finished fixing your hair and you turned around. You hugged her. She hugged you back. Few stray tears escaped. In the end, you are both sisters. In the end, both of you are women who have no control of their fates in the grand game of life. However, in the end, you are both dragons. You are both daughters of the rogue prince.

The wedding went without a hitch. Despite the convoluted feelings of everyone in the sept, at the exact moment your eyes meet his, yours evaporate away. The wedding was devotional. The feast was grandiose. The wedding night was…the wedding night was happy. You weren’t previously aware that happy was ever a word to describe such event but that is what you felt. Happiness. Pure bliss. You and Aemond made love. Giggled like children, made love like long lost lovers, even fed a shew tears like you were looking at a tragedy. When you woke up the next morning, you were filled with joy at the possibility that you would wake up like this every morning for the rest of your life. You could only dream.

High Valyrian Translations:

Issa tala- my daughter

[partmathpartmagic]

And isn’t that just like a sister? (1/2)

tw for references to orin/bhaal shit | Read on AO3 | part 2

"She wants to destroy you—but with her, for the first time, you think you make sense."

Sooo I think this is part 1 of a two-parter about Durge and Astarion having… complicated relationships with their families? I am *trying some stuff* here and idk if I like all of it but I am forcing myself to post it and not overthink it, pls enjoy and be nice

You knew before you knew, the sight of Orin up there with her—formerly your—co-conspirators, the way her braided hair moved when she turned, the way she stood. The shape of her. You knew.

But you needed her to give you the word for it. Sister, she calls you, and time stops.

It’s almost funny, really. For weeks now, you’d been hoping to find family once you reached the city. Family could give you something to anchor yourself to, something to orient yourself around. They would tell you who you were, though admittedly you had started to get the feeling that you didn’t want to know.

Still, even if you’d been made into a monster, you couldn’t have started that way.

Except, apparently, you could.

Now you’re standing in the street on a beautiful afternoon in front of your sister. Passersby should notice her, but they don’t, going about their days as usual. The smell of rotting flesh wafting off her scraps of clothing should be noticeable, if nothing else, but surely the chosen of Bhaal has her ways of staying hidden.

It’s not a smell that bothers you, though you wish it was. To you, it smells like home.

You’re staring at her white eyes and you remember the way you tried to see your reflection in them as a child, but they were too light and you were just a faint silhouette. Your eyes, solid black, reflect everything around them. People–and, perhaps, gods–always saw themselves in you, reflected back, and it drew them to you when Orin only ever unnerved them. So she was left behind, and now you remember, and you blame yourself for not seeing it until it was too late, but it was never personal. You were cold where Orin burned hot, calculated where Orin was passionate. You were better suited. That’s all it was.

But for your sister, everything is personal.

Astarion is next to you, and there’s disgust in every line of his face as he looks at her. You look back at Orin, and yes, you suppose you understand. It’s hard to see her objectively, though. An hour ago, she was just a distant enemy. Now, you know her too well to know what she looks like. She’s not a body, she’s a manic laugh, a vicious smile, a tongue cleaning a blade. She’s dark entity that followed you like a shadow, trying to cut your feet out from under you since the day she was born. She’s your little sister.

Her form shifts in your memory, but you know the smell of her blood. You know exactly how much pressure it takes to break her skin with a dull knife. And you know, above all, that you tried to help.

You tried so hard to explain to Orin that she was doing too much, that she was too eager. She loved Bhaal so much that it made him hate her. She hadn’t even waited for her grandfather to call her to his bed, offering herself up the moment he gave her a second glance, and he’d grown sick of her so quickly. She just needed, and needed, and needed, and she had given you no choice. You had no choice but to pull away. You and the other adults had conversations she didn’t understand, lost in her twisted fantasy land. She didn’t understand.

But it was never for lack of intelligence. You see her now, looking between you and Astarion, and you know she sees the threads that connect you. It’s her gift, one of many. Given half a chance, she will stretch them tight and play them like a harp before slicing through them—no, not slicing. Gnawing them one by one, letting them fray and unravel to a single fiber before they snap on their own. Making it last. She knows at a glance that he’s the most important thing in your life, and you’ve barely even realized it for yourself.

As she calculates how to hurt you most, you remember teaching her how to braid her hair with small fingers. She still wears it like that, down her back. Your heart is tender, horrible, and you wish, now you’ve had a chance at a new start, that you had shown her anything else, anything other than the world you were born into. But how could you have shown her what you yourself didn’t know existed?

In another life, she’d have been an artist.

She smiles and tilts her head, and time starts again, the sounds of the city gate crashing over you, a cool hand at your back, holding you steady.

Steady is something she’ll never know. She doesn’t know enough to want it, and she knows too much.

Your sister is disappearing in front of your eyes, and you’re relieved, but panic rises in your belly. You hadn’t realized what it would mean, having someone who knew the darkness you grew in. She wants to destroy you—but with her, for the first time, you think you make sense.

A cool hand is at your back, and you let her slip away.

Perhaps it’s enough to be understood from the outside. Perhaps a family you build from scratch is enough.

You let the hand pull you close, and you turn away.

[numinously-yours]

Hello there, nice to meet you! If free readings aren't open, pls feel free to ignore my ask

I wanted to get a free reading from you about How does the initial stages of my relationship or the courtship be like from my future spouse 's point of view?

Thank you a lot 💕🖤

- E

Hi there E :)

This was a cute and fun spin on a love reading, so thanks for the request! I pulled for three sections: 1) How they feel/act when they first see you, 2) How they feel/act once you go on your first date, and 3) How they feel/act once you "define" the relationship

1). When they first see you - King of Cups & Six of Wands

Ooh, they are VERY sure of themselves when they see you for the first time! Both of these cards invoke confidence, diplomacy, and success. Something about you makes them think "YES, this is a person I need to talk to!" They know that they need to take the diplomatic approach when they decide to introduce themselves. They can't come off as too excited but they also can't be boring. They are going to make a logical plan about their approach. This person understands that first impressions mean a lot and they want to make sure that they're impressive to you.

2). First date - Page of Pentacles rev. & Three of Cups

In their eyes, the first date doesn't go as well as they had wanted. I think because they were so confident in their approach that they may have gotten ahead of themselves when it came to the actual date. When they leave the date, they might wonder "Crap, E probably just wants to be friends..." This person may spend the date in a daydream state, because they're so happy to be there with you, but when they reflect on the reality of the date they don't think they conversed enough, made enough connection with you, or conveyed how much they liked you. Another thing that may happen is that while you're on the date, you may run into people that you know. One of you may invite them to join you. If it is you, this may be part of the reason they think you just want to be friends. If it is them, when they look back, they hit themselves on the head because they think you think you just want to be friends.

3). After DTR - Eight of Cups & The Sun

The Eight of Cups, I think, is actually referring to the time between the first date and DTR. Even though y'all still hang out and do relationship-y things, this person still has some doubt in them. Perhaps it feels too good to be true, they assume they'll be hurt in the end so they start hurting themselves (subconsciously) now; but, then the sun comes out! Once the relationship is defined, there is a complete 180 in this person's mood and outlook of the relationship. All of the signs keep pointing toward good things. And the more this happens, the more this person realizes that good things CAN happen and that you both are deserving of them. The relationship feels warm, happy, fun, and optimistic. Even when something "bad" happens, you help them rise above it and continually remind them that you're here for the long haul.

Thank you for letting me read for you! D

[nonomives]

hpe tp draw fangs pls your artstyle is me wanting to nom

Hi, im answering this and your other ask for a hand tutorial

Im not really the best person to ask for tutorials simply bc im not all that good at in-depth explanations on how to do things. Plus there are many people out there who can do a better job at teaching u, most of whom you can probably get a better understanding on the topics at hand

Tho i can give you some tips, i really do suggest you watch tutorials from professional artists that really know what theyre doing. Actually, Ethan Becker has some neat ones on youtube. I learned most of the stuff i know now from him

Heres a link to one of his tutorials about how to draw mouths

Anyways my tips are this:

1. Use dynamic references - kinda helps with understanding anatomy a lot more if u use refs like objects in odd angles, dancing poses, angry teeth clenching (no kidding, i legit learned how to draw teeth bc of this)

2. Use nagative space - the negative space is basically the one that doesnt have lines or blocks of colors. This applies more on teeth but its basically filling a space completely black or whatever color, and then erasing bits of it. Its a shortcut that helps with depth

Kinda like this:

3. Less is more - group things together. Its kinda like drawing hair. U dont need to draw each strand, just like u dont need to draw every teeth or every finger. It makes things easier for you in the long run. Plus the way ypu group things help add personality to the thing ur drawing

Like this:

Welp those are my 3 tips hope this helps in some way! Good luck learning!!

[tmwcs]

Masterlist (Not for minors)

- Heeseung-

My Girlfriends Roommate / MGR (1st arc of series) Chapter 1 - Mmkay Chapter 2 - Oooooookaaaaay Chapter 3 - Getting there Chapter 4 - Almost Chapter 5 -Oh damn Chapter 6 - ........ Chapter 7 - Here we go Chapter 8 - Omg theres fluff Chapter 9 - Fluff, fluff, fluff, and fluff. Chapter 10 - OMFG Its finally happening!!! 18+ Only Chapter 11 - ...THE HELL!?!! O...M...G 18+ Only Chapter 12 - DAFUQ!!!? ERMAHGAWD!! JDASHWGEI!!!!! 18+ Only --End-

MGR SMAUS:

Vicky's Roommate

Knowing me, Knowing you Part 1

Knowing me, Knowing you Part 2

Its not enough Part 1

Its not enough Part 2

Frustration

Wont you say my name?

!!!!!!!!Netflix and Chill SMAU should be the very last smau to read after reading all the other smaus (to include in MRE and HHP) because the references in it will be too confusing. I highly recommending reading MGR at the very least before reading this SMAU as well. it's very sentimental and also..there's tension that hits deep that can only be felt once you read MGR. Enjoy.

Netflix and Chill Part 1 - Read after all SMAUS in all arcs first and MGR

Netflix and Chill Part 2 -Read after all SMAUS in all arcs first and MGR

Netflix and Chill Part 3 - Read after all SMAUS in all arcs first and MGR

My Roommates Ex / MRE (Sequel to MGR, 2nd arc of the same series/universe)

Chapter 1 - Oooooh the fluff be strong in this chapter

Chapter 2 - Drama, drama, drama.

Chapter 3 - Let the juiciness commence. 18+ only.

Chapter 4 - This made y'all go crazy a little bit, huh?

Chapter 5 - Don't say I didn't warn you. Let me know what you guys think of this chapter, its one of my favorites actually. (18+ only)

Chapter 6 - Let me know what you guys think of this one. This is the last chapter for this arc, working on the third arc of the same series as we speak along with MT. (18+ Only)

MRE SMAUS:

Olive Juice Part 1

Olive Juice Part 2

Say it again and move with me

What is "it" ??

Send me a selfie or else...

I worship you.

Why are you not answering?

I need you

You really wanna know?

One and Only...

Give and take back

Unknown Number

Group Chat Part 1

Group Chat Part 2

Car Door

His and Her Perspectives / HHP (Sequel to MGR/MRE, 3rd arc of the same series/universe)

Chapter 1 - Yay first chapter! (18+ Only)

Chapter 2 - Heeseung/Ethan POV on you, omg such a beautiful chapter. (18+ only)

Chapter 3 - Just another day in the life of you and MGR/MRE/HHP Heeseung. Only for those that are 18+ older. Adults, enjoy!

Chapter 4 - Enter beotch Tiff, you guys aren't going to like her at all and she is based off of a very unpleasant person that was rude to a friend of mine back in HS. so yeah. 18+ only for this chapter so minors, pass over on this one pls.

Chapter 5 Part(s) 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, and 10. - sorry this is divided into so many parts, tumblr was acting up and would not let me paste anything beyond 1k words at a time for some reason.

Chapter 6 Part(s) 1 , 2, 3, 4,

Chapter 7 -

Chapter 8 -

Chapter 9 -

Chapter 10 Part(s) 1, 2, 3

Chapter 11 Part(s) 1 , 2 , 3, 4 OMG......This chapter i swear to God.

Chapter 12 Part(s) 1, 2 .....aaaah...redemption.

Chapter 13 Part(s) 1 , 2, 3. (Part is adult rated MDNI)

Chapter 14 Part(s) 1, 2, 3. - PLEASE understand that this is a very dark and twisted chapter. Heethan is PISSED and he's not in the right mind and shit just got real. but read the warnings bc Eden even gets back at Tiff....in a very brutal way. (recall her warning to her in earlier chapter when Tiff tried to confront her in the campus building) so please read at your own risk (it's still a good read)

HHP SMAUS:

Come rain or shine

Vegan Food

Good at acting :P

The Sun and the Flower

Ethan's hungry

Jealous

Feeling a little lonely

Freaks

Blood and Carnage

MGR/MRE/HHP One shots

Halloween Part 1

Halloween Part 2 - coming soon

Jealous - coming soon

Needy

Shark Week

Mermaids Tale (New series)

Chapter 1 - Slay! You are the Daughter of the Seven Seas

Chapter 2 - Whoo hoo! Chapter 2! I really like this story guys.

Chapter 3 - Yay its finally here! there's alot to this chapter, please feel free to send anon asks or message me if you need me to explain because alot of historical (made up, mythological) references are in this one.

Chapter 4 - Coming 05/31

Upcoming:

You're a fan. I'm a fan. - One shot (maybe a couple chapters long) but is going to be good. Smut writers, this one is for you guys. (hintity hint hint)

[poursomesunaonme]

18(oral sex)+37 w oikawa and iwazumi where oikawa doesn't know how to make reader cum and mentions that to iwa, who offers himself to show how is done😤🥵

JESUS CHRIST NONNIE THIS WAS SUCHA BIG BRAINED IDEA I LOVE U IM GONNA STEAL UR BRAIN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT EHEHEHEHEHEH

send me a character and 1-2 numbers & i'll write you a lil drabble<3

wc: 797

cw: nsfw, minors dni (pls have age in bio or dm it to me), oral sex (female receiving), cucking

“zu zu!” you call from the couch at the sight of the man coming through the door with toru. “what are you doing here?”

the men share a look before toru turns to you with a sheepish grin. “i may have mentioned… something… at one time or another… and iwa… uh… offered his assistance.”

you raise an eyebrow at the cryptic answer, but shrug off toru’s behavior and turn back to the show you’re fixated on. the boys don’t hesitate to drop their stuff at the door and kick off their shoes, coming to rest on either side of you.

there’s a certain tension in the air - one that hangs thickly around you. you don’t remember anything in the house needing to be fixed, if that's what toru had referred to earlier. so instead, you just wait for the truth to come to light.

that certainly doesn’t take long.

toru’s hands creep over your thigh, squeezing the muscle. you turn to him and see a lazy smile creep across his lips. he leans in and kisses you once, twice, before you pull away and jerk your head towards iwa.

“it’s okay, just let it happen.”

“let what happen?” your question goes unanswered as toru kisses you again, leaving iwa to his own devices.

you feel a hand on your other thigh, prying your legs open. even with your eyes closed, you know it’s not toru’s. his hands are soft, which is rare for a setter. this hand is rough.

you pull away from the kiss to find iwa lifting himself off the couch to settle between your legs.

“um, what are you doing?”

a hand on your cheek steers your gaze back to toru. “iwa’s just helping us out. he said that he’d, uh… show me the ropes.”

you laugh and understand. “so that’s what this is about.”

toru smiles cheekily, thumb running along the underside of your jaw. “so… do you mind?”

“i guess not.” you shrug, lifting your hips off the couch so that iwa can pull your shorts and panties off. “do you mind?”

“anything to help me please my princess.” his voice is sickeningly sweet as his lips meet yours again. you lean into the kiss, shrugging off the peculiar feeling of iwa’s hands wrapping around your thighs.

“you can tell me to stop anytime,” he pipes up for the first time since arriving. you nod, too entranced in the little thing toru does with his teeth on your lips.

iwa’s breath is hot on your cunt as he hesitates for a moment before pressing a kiss to your folds. you squirm at the sensation, but toru’s arms wrapping around you provide an ample anchor to his lips.

the slippery muscle of a tongue slides between your folds and you gasp, letting the sound be swallowed into toru’s mouth. iwa doesn’t hold back for long, starting to weasel his way between your thighs to get more comfortable.

as much as he hates to admit it, toru doesn’t do a good job of eating you out. he tries, he really does, but after an hour, sometimes more, of burying his face in your cunt, it just doesn’t get you off. and toru’s not the person to get his partner go unsatisfied. which is why, you assume, he had recruited iwaizumi as help.

you hate to enjoy the way his tongue swirls around your clit, how his lips close perfectly around the throbbing bud, but you know that in the end, it will only serve to help toru bring you over the same crest.

your eyes flash open at a particularly poignant move iwa does with his tongue only to find that toru watches his friend out of the corner of his eye. you pull back and lick his spit off your lips.

“y’know,” you mutter, “if you just wanna watch…”

“oh, thank god you said that,” toru grins, “you know i’m a visual learner.”

you smile at his eagerness and lean into his chest, reveling in the feeling of his hands roaming over your body. he rolls your nipples between his fingers. the sensation brings an extra amount of arousal to your buzzing body. it isn’t long before iwa brings you to the edge.

“you’re close?” toru asks against your neck. he brings his head up to take in the sight of your face, finding a hazy look and a soft smile. “oh, you are!”

you laugh and pull him in for a kiss, lifting your hips closer to iwa’s face so that he can finish the job. the pretty sounds pour from your lips into toru’s mouth and he swallows them greedily, knowing that the next time you cum like that, it’s gonna be his face buried in your legs that makes you.

© all work belongs to poursomesunaonme. do not copy and repost.

[charthanry]

what do you think about korn×pran friendship and wai×pat friendship( there's not really much but yea...)

also.. pls😭😭korn wasn't kidding when he said he has a crush on some guy from architecture! I'm so sure of it!

Anon, why would you do this? Why would you infest my inbox with a Wai-related ask? I must now lysol the shit out of this place😷. Honestly, I don't think about Waisel so his begrudging friendship with Pat is not something I care about. If Wai ever gets a passing thought from me, it's usually in relation to Pran or his relationship with Pat. To me, Wai is not someone deserving of my time beyond being Pran-adjacent.

I do think Pat tolerates Wai for Pran's sake though. We see Pat joke about being jealous of Pran's other man, but I don't think he's insecure about Wai whatsoever. Anytime he brings up Wai, it's to tease Pran or play pouty "pay attention to me" boyfriend. I also don't think Pat holds any grudge against Wai (that’s not his modus operandi–unlike me), so for Pat, Wai is just someone who orbits his space from time to time.

The way I see it: Pat probably wouldn’t save Wai’s number in his contacts so when Wai does call or text to ask about Pran’s whereabouts, Pat’s response is “new phone, who dis?” And after the nth time of this, it annoys the crap out of Wai, which is just bonus if you ask me.

Now, a Korn and Pran friendship is one I can definitely get behind. Korn is the kind of friend who’ll glom onto Pat’s boyfriend whenever he can. He’s just as touchy as Pat so does it to mostly get under Pat’s skin but also Pran is so adorably touchable, who’d be able to resist? 

Here are a few scenarios that I see for Korn: 

1. You’re dating my best friend? Man, that must suck for you. Also, everything he knows about pleasuring a lover in bed he learned from me. To which Pran’s response is “so basically, nothing?” Korn: “Hey!! But yeah, basically.” 

2. You mess with Pran? You tired of living? Be prepared, you're getting a serving of Korn with a side of ham meaning Korn is about to go ham on you. And yes, Korn would very much refer to himself in third person. And yes, his puns (and mine) are truly horrendous.

But also, his loyalty to Pat extends to Pran without question.

3. Korn would be that kind of best man at their wedding, where Pat gets waylaid by something stupid, like traffic, and Korn is all “guess I gotta step in and marry you myself, Pran. I promised Pat.” 

Everyone: “uh, that’s not what he meant by stepping in if he’s late, he meant entertain the guests.” 

Korn: “No, I’m pretty sure he meant I should marry Pran in his place. I gotta lock it in, get Pran off the market for him. It’s an unspoken understanding between me and Pat.” 

Everyone: “I don’t think–” 

Korn: “I SAID unspoken understanding!! It’s a brother-husbands thing.” 

Everyone: "That's sister-wives and I don't think that’s how it works– oh thank God, Pat's here."

4. Also, Korn would be the VERY LAST PERSON Pat and Pran would ever ask to babysit their kids because the guy needs supervision himself. Kid #1: “Don’t worry dads, I’ll watch Uncle Korn and make sure he stays out of trouble.” Kid #2: “And I’ll watch the both of them and make sure the house is still standing when you two get back.” Guess which parent kids 1 and 2 each take after.

5. I can also envision Korn being flustered when Pat and Pran fight. We saw a bit of it in EP9, where he tried to mediate and play peacemaker. My two dads are fighting? Can’t have that. So, he’d do something silly like break out into Mr. Roboto dance moves to lessen the tension which would work because Pran would be like WTF mid-argument and look at Pat like remind me again why you are friends with this guy? And Pat would just laugh and join Korn in horrible dancing which would make Pran laugh, argument forgotten. And Korn would beam in satisfaction at mission accomplished.

Really, the only person happier about Pat and Pran being together than Pat and Pran, is Korn. And you always want someone like that in your corner, colorful windbreaker and all.

I love how Pat uses Korn’s shoulder as an armrest here and how it’s just a given for Korn who leans into it. That’s true broship y'all.